Chapter Text
Thomas sat in one of the huts that the builders had made.
Yep, he was in paradise. It didn't feel like it. He couldn't help but feel the void of depression that floated around his heart. Memories of Alby, Chuck, Teresa....Newt.
Newt, he killed newt. And he would never forgive himself.
Thomas sighed and fiddled with a loose thread on his shirt. He could hear the sounds of happy chatter and laughter coming from outside. Everyone was really happy.
Everyone arrived in paradise about two weeks ago too discover that there was some houses dotted around, and all of them had electricity. So the already built houses got turned into places where people would just walk in and out of, most people chose to sleep in them as well as eat in them.
Frypan was the head chef and had a kitchen in the middle of the main park. All the houses are circled around the main park. The Main Park is basically one big field. With wooden benches in, where everyone would sit and eat.
Suddenly a bell started ringing, causing Thomas to look up and wake up from his daydreaming. The foodbell. That means that lunch is ready.
Thomas wasn't hungry, not in the slightest. He just couldn't get the image of Newt getting shot out of his head. The way his body jerked off Thomas's and landed with a 'thud' into the floor. The pool of blood and brain matter , the bloody remains of what used to be one of his best friends.
Thomas can feel the weight of the note that Newt gave to him in his pocket, he has never been able to get rid of it. He just can't bear it.
Thomas stood up and trudged to the door of the empty hut. He walkes out and is met with the bright sunlight shining on his mole covered face.
The sounds of laughter rings loudly in his ears and Thomas allows himself to smile.
At least others are happy.
Thomas's eyes land on a table where Jorge, Brenda, Aris, Gally and Minho sit. He makes his way to the table and plonks himself next to Brenda and opposite Minho.
"Hey look it's Thomas ! The ugliest shank that I have ever seen !"Minho jokes and Gally chuckles.
Thomas rolls his eyes and just stares at his lap. Minho still doesn't know about Newt. It would crush him if he ever found out.
"Thomas what's wrong with you ?"Brenda asks and Thomas looks up at her with dad eyes.
"What do you mean ?"He asks, dread fills up inside him.
"Well you have been incredibly distant since we arrived here, you haven't been eating properly and you basically ignore us"She says bluntly and Jorge nudges her.
"Not too mention but you permanently look like a kicked puppy"Minho states.
"I'm fine"Thomas says quickly, trying to answe as quickly as he possibly can.
"You're obviously not, look Thomas, we have not said anything before because we get it, you have had a sh*t life, we all have. We thought that you would get better, but you haven't, it's like your getting worse, please just talk to us"Brenda says and grabs one of Thomas's hands. Thomas flinches and moves his hand away from her.
A hurt look flashes on her face and Thomas suddenly feels guilty.
"Newt would know what to say"
Thomas head darts up to see Minho looking at his lap and muttering to himself.
"Newt was the best at being comforting, he always knew what to say"Minho mutters and then looks up.
"Thomas what's in your pocket ?"Brend suddenly asked and Thomas puts his hand too his pocket, protectively. Panic rushes through him.
"Nothing"He says quickly and scoots slightly away from brenda.
"Is it paper ?"She asks and her eyes widen.
"We haven't got any paper in paradise, where did you get it from ?"She says and before Thomas can react the paper is ripped from his pocket.
"Brenda no !"He shouts but she already throws it to Minho to grabs it and opens it up.
Thomas eyes widen in panic.
"Minho ! Please don't read it, please"Thomas begs and Minho raises his eyebrows.
Curiosity is in everyone eyes apart from Thomases. His eyes are watering and tears are threatening to spill.
"Minho....please don't" he says but Minho ignores him. He reads the note. His eyes widen and start watering. His eyes scan the words and his arms start shaking.
"Is...this...what I think it is ?"He asks and hai face goes red with anger.
"What the hell is going on !"Brenda yells as Aris and Gally are trying to peak at the letter.
"Please...i didn't have a chose....he was begging....and he had a gun..."
Thomas suddenly gets cut off as Minho lungs at him from across the table. Thomas yells out as his back falls off the table and hits the floor.
People from around gasp and everyone is slient.
"YOU DID IT ! YOU'RE THE REASON HE IS DEAD !"Minho screams and rains punches onto Thomas's face.
Pain errupts all over as the punches rain onto Thomas's poor body.
"You know ! Let's not hurt your pretty little face !"Minho screams and starts raining hard punches onto Thomas stomach.
Thomas struggles against his grip and is aware of people trying the pry Minho away from Thomas but it isn't working.
Thomas suddenly screams as he feels one of his ribs crack beneath Minho's fist. Minho takes this opportunity to grab Thomas's wrist and suddenly jerk it back. The sound of bones crunching makes Thomas scream a broken scream full of pain and heart break.
"Minho stop !"Brenda yells as he is suddenly dragged away from Thomas.
Thomas coughs and sits up. Minho is being held back by Frypan, Aris, Jorge and Gally.
"YOU UGLY SHANK ! YOU MAKE ME SICK !"Minho screams and screams insults at Thomas.
Thomas shakily stands up and clutches at his stomach. He doesn't say anything, he just lets Minho throw the insults at him. He doesn't even look him in the eyes. He just can't face him. He can cope with the guilt that's tearing him apart.
"You killed my best friend....and I will never ever forgive you Thomas, you know, I thought that you were such a hero ! A shank who has saved everybody ! But it's not true ! Your worse than the flare, as soon as you came to the glade, everyone started dying, Chuck, Alby, Teresa and everyone who ever died in the Glade...their blood is on your hands !"Minho shouts and shrugs out of Gally's grip. He turns around and stomps away from Thomas.
Ouch
Those words cut deep. Those words hurt more than the beating that he just took. Tears drop from Thomas's eyes and he turns around and limps away from the whole crowd of immunes. Everyone had seen what had happened.
Not one person missed it.
Not even Brenda tried to stop Thomas as he limped off into the woods. Alone, hurt and scared.
The pain started to consume him. Blood pouring from his nose. He holds on to his broken torso and starts to sob shamelessly as he limps further and further away from the people that he thought were his friends.
Everything that Minho had said was true. If it wasn't for Thomas then everyone would probably still be alive.
He had screwed everything up. And now he has so much blood on his hands.
Thomas walked for hours, it was now getting dark an he had no idea where he was. They had yet to explore the island so he has no clue where he is going, or where the way back is.
But he doesn't care.
He will never care. He has nothing to care for. Now everyone probably hates him.
But he just doesn't get why they wouldn't just listen to his side of the story. But if he knows anything from his friendship with Minho.
Minho punches first, asks questions later.
"Stupid WICKED, stupid flare, stupid life, STUPID EVERYTHING !"Thomas screams, becoming hysterical.
While crying out shamelessly the broken boy collapses into a tree. A new pain dragging it's self onto his body.
Thomas cries out in pain. He shamelessly starts sobbing, sobbing hard, crying like he has never cried before. He doesn't care anymore. He just doesn't want to be on this planet anymore.
If this is what paradise is like, then he would just rather rot in hell.
Hours pass as the boy sits next to the tree. He has now stopped crying and started thinking, think about how badly his life is messed up.
He watches as the sun slowly goes down and the night chill hits him in waves and makes him shiver. He listens to the chirp of crickets and watches as the moon brightens up the dull night.
A owl hoots in the background and Thomas listens with pleasure as he listens to the beautiful wildlife. Suddenly little yellow glowing things start flying around him.
Fire flies.
They are beautiful, Thomas's eyes light up as he watches the stunning fire flies dance infront of his vision. He almost forgets about the immense pain......Almost.
Thomas slowly closes his eyes to the smell of must and grass. He falls into the darkness and passes out into the sweet, painless oblivion.
More hours pass when Thomas wakes up, the sun is now shining directly on him. He welcomes the warmth with open arms.
He has cramp and is aware of an rocking digging into his upper thigh. But he doesn't care, it would hurt to much to move.
But it hurts to much to move, to think, to do anything.
So he doesn't do anything, he just closes his eyes and silently weeps.
Thomas stayed in the same stop.
He never returned to his friends.
He just stayed watching his surroundings until that was the last thing he saw.
Lonely and filled with guilt.