Chapter Text
A blonde man stands by his lonesome in a hospital, palms slightly moist from the built-up sweat due to his underlying nervousness. In his hands, on the verge of slipping out, is an arrangement of roses and a box of chocolates that’s surely melting because of the summer heat. In front of him is the door leading to the room of a patient he felt very fondly of. This patient is supposed to wake up today.
That patient is you.
The blonde man that smells of cigarettes got up bright and early that day; earlier than he would’ve liked but today isn’t about him. It’s about you. The thing is, he didn’t exactly know how to approach you… because of your condition . The nurse told him something extremely important before he would visit you today.
“ Are you Shizuo Heiwajima…? …Oh, That’s wonderful! Well, we’ve contacted you with good news! Ms. (y/n) has woken up today. Would you like to come see her…? Amazing. Visiting hours begin at 6:00 am… ”
That’s how the phone call would’ve gone if he’d hung up and hurried back home to prepare for your meeting that day—but there was more .
“ …Also, the doctor believes that you should be informed of the condition that she is in before coming. She suffers from severe amnesia due to her head injury. Please refrain from upsetting her while we work to bring her memory back! ”
Shizuo wondered why the hospital contacted him and not your family, but he wouldn’t complain. He needs to see you, especially after everything. His anxiety blossoms when he stepped into the room. You were looking out the window, not even noticing him until he’s inside. Your hair is short, growing back from your head being shaved for your operation and your eyes were droopy. Presumably from you being woken up so early after probably being on a ton of medication that made you drowsy.
The man is captivated by your simple beauty, adorning a hospital gown and a short hairstyle. Then he notices that you are looking at him now.
“Um…do I know you…?”
Your soft-spoken voice is barely audible but it brings Shizuo back to reality. “Hey—uh, no— I-I mean, yes. You do.” He sputters out, causing your confused expression to soften. “Oh, are you Shizuo?” You ask. He nods. “Yeah.” He takes a deep breath before making his way over to your bed. “How are you feeling?”
“I…I don’t know. My…head hurts.” You watched as Shizuo removes the dead flowers from the nearby vase, putting in the fresh ones he had just brought. He takes the pair of scissors to trim the stems and edges so it could fit better. It looks as though he’d done this already.
While you were asleep, Shizuo visited you a lot. He’d come by before and after his shifts and sit with you for hours. Sometimes, he’d even talk in hopes that once you woke up, you’d think of him. Finally, the day is here and you didn’t even know who he was.
“How bad is it?” He ceases his actions. “I’ll get a nurse, they can help you.”
“N-No!” You cover your mouth as if you’ve shouted by accident. You remove your hands. “I’m sorry.” You whisper, realizing Shizuo has frozen at your words. Your gaze went back to the window. You watch the cars go by. You see how fast they are going.
“Do you know who else was in the accident? Are they okay?” Your delicate hands rest on your lap. Shizuo saw how your fingers occasionally curl and grip the sheets when you talk. “The accident? Oh, yeah, they’re okay. You’re the only one who got hurt.” He tells you. Your sullen expression didn’t change. “Good.” You reply, before trying to make eye contact with him. “Thank you for bringing this stuff for me.” You manage to curl your lips up into a sweet smile; a smile that makes him blush.
“No problem.” Shizuo then sees you try to reach for the heart-shaped box of chocolates that’s slightly too far. You’re held back by the IV in your arm risking being ripped out if you lean any further. “Hey, I’ll get it.”
In a swift motion, he tears off the plastic wrap and cardboard boxing that holds the candy. “Sorry.” You hear him mutter. You don’t reply, only taking the item from him in silence.
As you eat a few, here and there, Shizuo sits next to you in the visiting chair. You watch the TV with the sound coming from the remote that sits a few inches away from your leg. The situation is finally beginning to set in for him.
“How much do you remember?” Shizuo suddenly asks. “Not much.” You answer.
“Do you remember your name?”
“Yes.”
“Do you remember how old you are?”
“The nurses told me.”
“Do you remember what happened the day you got hurt?”
“I was in a car accident.”
“Do you remember me ?”
You hesitate . A sound emits from your mouth but it’s unintelligible. Shizuo raises an eyebrow. “Do you?” He repeats. You purse your lips before shaking your head. “No…who are you to me?”
“I’m—your boyfriend .”
You visibly jump at the revelation, blushing hard and in turn, making Shizuo blush too; his blush being more noticeable. “W-Wait, you’re my boyfriend?” Like a schoolgirl, your hands cover your face to hide your expression.
“Yeah,” Shizuo says plainly. “Who did you think I was?”
“I-I don’t know! A-A Friend?! The nurses told me you visited me a lot but…How long have we been dating?”
Shizuo’s eyes roll up and to the side as if he were thinking before he answers. “Since high school.”
“R-Really? I’m so s-sorry I can’t remember.”
Shizuo’s subtle joy turns into alertness as your voice begins to waver as you speak to him. You didn’t exactly sound happy anymore. You’re crying. “I’m sorry that I forgot you.”
Now, what’s he suppose to do? You’ve never cried in front of him before. “Aye, it's alright. You don’t need to cry. The memory loss is only temporary.”
“It is?”
Shizuo doesn’t know if the amnesia is temporary or not but he'd say anything at this point to get you to stop crying. Plus, the doctors already said not to upset you while they try to make things right again. “Of course,” Shizuo replies, his hand making its way to your cheek. His thumb feels like a piece of fabric on your skin. It barely touches you but your tears are gone. “I’m gonna take care of you, so no more cryin’, kay?”
You nod, trusting him fully. You wipe the bottom of your eyes and your nose with tissue from the Kleenex box by your bed. “Did you eat breakfast, yet?” Shizuo asks as he reaches for the chocolates to have some for himself. To be honest, he’s pretty hungry, He skipped breakfast to be here.
“No. Not hungry.”
Shizuo sighs. “You have to eat. It’s the only way you’re going to get better. Why aren’t you hungry? Food not good?”
The man watchs your eyes. You blink slowly and your pupils shift from left to right from time to time. “I don’t know. I guess. I don’t like hospital food.” You tell him. He chuckles lightly. “It’s the first morning you’re up and you’ve already decided you don’t like the food?”
This time, you didn’t answer. It’s clear what you think. “Um… can I ask why you're dressed like that?” You aren’t exactly able to tell why he’d wear a bartending uniform unless he worked there. “Am I making you late for work?!”
“Oh, this? No, don’t worry.” He looks down at himself. “My brother, Kasuka, bought a bunch of these for me and I can’t let them go to waste.”
Kasuka? That name seems familiar…maybe?
“I see. I think you look really good in it.” Your face begins to heat up. It’s dawning on you that this man is so handsome and his voice is—ugh~! Is he your boyfriend? “I’m beginning to wonder how I was able to pull someone like you.”
The man seems a bit shocked at the things you have to say. He hides his eyes with his sunglasses. “I should be the one asking that. I’m just a regular guy. Heal up fast so that we can get you home—”
“What is it that you like about me?”
That catches him off guard. “There’s a lot of things I like about you. Why’s that important now?” Oh, the guilt that fills his body when he sees your expression falter just a little bit. “Well,” You shift in the hospital bed. “I don’t remember you or how we met or why we are dating so I was curious.”
“Like I said, the amnesia is temporary but—if it’ll make you feel better then I’ll just tell you.” Shizuo feels around in his pockets for a moment. ‘Damn, where did I put it?’ He thinks to himself. You patiently wait before him for a few moments before he pulls out something new. It’s a smartphone.
“This is yours.” He says, handing you the device. You take it from him, examining it a little. “Mine?” You tilt your head. “Yeah, the other one got banged up in the accident. I got you a new one. It’s expensive, so don’t go droppin’ it.”
Your ears perk up. “Huh? O-Oh, Shizuo, you don’t have to do this. Please, anything would’ve been fine.” Your eyes pan over to Shizuo’s phone that he left on the windowsill where he had placed the new flowers. He owns a simple flip phone. Surely, he could use a new phone, not you. You couldn’t remember phone numbers or any information that would make having a phone more useful.
“It’s a gift. Just take it before I start regretting it.”
You press your lips together. This man seems so selfless and sweet. You start to believe the claim that he is your boyfriend. So, it must be okay to express affection, right? You had to at least try.
“Sh-Shizuo?” You call softly, grabbing his attention for a brief moment. You motioned him to come to you and he listened, getting up from his chair completely. He was now at the edge of your bed. You still beckon him to come closer and so he bent down. No one can imagine what his face of subtle joy meant inside of him when you press a chaste kiss on his cheek. Your hand on the other side of his face is a soothing cold that gives him butterflies. You were actually touching him. You kissed him.
He wants to kiss you too but…
“Thank you for everything.” You smile again. He smiles too. “Anything for you.”
Shizuo pulls away when he hears his phone ringing. He sighs, cursing under his breath and going to look at the caller ID. It read: “Tom.” You take note of Shizuo’s reaction. “Do you have to go…?” You try not to sound sad but naturally, because of your situation, you did. “Yeah, but I’ll be back later, I promise.” He places a hurried kiss on your forehead before finally answering his phone call.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m comin’. Let’s make this round fast, I have things to do…” And that was the last you heard of Shizuo. For now, at least. He didn’t answer your question.
Butterflies fill your belly and bloom into excitement. “Shizuo” seems like such a good person. At least, you hope he is. You examine your new phone. Its thin and black with no charms or accessories. A very sleek design. This is something you’d definitely drop.
You turn it on. It takes a few moments but you’re able to get it to boot up. When the lock screen loads, you are instantly met with new prompts.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
Please Choose Your Primary Language:
► English
► 日本人
┗━━━━━━━━┛
You pick your desired language and move on to actually using the phone now. The phone chirps with a bell sound for every new notification that pops up. There are text boxes that would come up and tell you how to access certain features of the phone. And then you notice that there were texts from a person. An unknown number.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
From: (xxx) xxx - xxxx
Hey. Sorry, I had to run outta there.
-
And about “us.”
-
We met at Raira Academy. We were best friends.
-
I fell in love with you.
-
You accepted me.
-
And, since then, I’ve loved everything about you.
┗━━━━━━━━┛
His words almost bring you to tears. “Shizuo…” You quickly save his number under a better name.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
New Contact: Shizuo ♡
┗━━━━━━━━┛
You text him back.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
To: Shizuo ♡
It’s okay.
-
Thank you so much.
┗━━━━━━━━┛
You’re in the middle of hitting “send” when you hear your door open once again. You can tell from the shadow that its a tall man with short hair. Your face lights up. “Oh, Shizuo?” but then your smile falls. “Oh…” It, in fact, isn’t Shizuo. Instead, you are met with a dark haired man, wearing a particular coat with fur trim on the hood. He isn’t as tall as Shizuo either, being considerably shorter but still taller than you.
“ It seems that my sleeping beauty is finally awake.”
You raise an eyebrow. “ ‘Sleeping Beauty’? Who are you? Are we friends?” You observe his body language. It’s cheery and open but it doesn’t match the tone of voice. “Friends? Of course, we are.” He skips over to your chair, silently looking around the room. His gaze lingers on the fresh flowers.
“I see that your beloved Shizu-chan has already visited you. Too bad, I just missed him.” He shrugs, shaking his head slowly. “Shizu-chan? Who—oh! Shizuo? That’s a cute nickname.” You laugh to yourself. “Yes, Shizuo came through here…” You trail off, lowering your gaze. “I’m sorry but I’m afraid I don’t remember your name.”
“Do you know how long you’ve been asleep?” The man fidgets in his chair when he speaks. He plays with something that is in the pocket of his jacket, he leans back in the chair and forward. It’s like he can’t sit still. Something is brewing inside of him.
“Um—”
“Six months. That’s an awful long time. He hurt you that bad, huh? What a shame. ” The unknown man smirks, making sure to emphasize the appropriate keywords. You furrow your eyebrows. “He? Someone did this to me?” You ask, leaning forward in your bed.
“You can call me Izaya Orihara. We were friends before your little situation and you see—I’m an informant. I’m always willing to help a friend remember her past.” Izaya helped himself to one of the hospital-branded food items in front of you. It was a cup of orange juice. “No one told me that somebody did this to me. The doctors said it was a car accident.” You grip your bedsheets, heart-rate quickening.
“That’s what they told you? How tragic.” He peels back the seal of the cup of juice and downed it in one gulp. “Mmm.” He hums with a scrunched nose. “A bit too sweet for my liking but decent for free stuff.”
“Excuse me!”
“Oh! Forgive me. I knew you’d say ‘no’ if I asked so I just thought I should help myself anyway.” Izaya smiles a fake smile, subtly taking another one. “I don’t care about the juice. Explain to me what you mean. Who did this?! Is it being investigated?”
Izaya suddenly jumps out of his seat. “Welp. It’s been real. I already got your number. I’ll text you. Because you’re my favorite human, I’ll give you a piece of advice. Take everything with a grain of salt from now on. I’m probably the only person you can trust.” His voice conveys a sense of worry and desperation but his face only showed pure evil.
“Huh? Wait!” You shout, trying to chase after him but your legs aren't working. “Please!”
“Aw. Little girl can’t keep up? Maybe I’ll visit again. I just came by to see for myself that you survived. Glad you did. Bye-bye now!”
“Come back…”
Now, you are alone again. Physically, you aren’t. A team of doctors came in to take care of you. But emotionally, you are. The sky turns orange and purple as the sun sets. ‘Where’s Shizuo?’ You wish that you could walk so that you could at least look at the people below.
You pull out your phone. No new notifications. But that’s okay. You could just text first.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
To: Shizuo ♡
Hi.
-
I hope your day was okay.
┗━━━━━━━━┛
Almost a second later, you hear your phone make another bell sound. Eager, you rush to open the phone to see what he would say. But instead, you got an email.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
From: [email protected]
You have been invited to the Dollars!
The password is “baccano”
┗━━━━━━━━┛
You squint a bit. “The Dollars? What’s that?” You mutter. The email has a link attached. Curious, you click the link. The destination is a dark-mode website with text that reads “Dollars.” Below, there is an empty white bar that has “password” next to it. You go ahead and type the password from the email. It lets you in, prompting you to create a username. You try a few. They were all taken except for one.
┏━━━━━━━━┓
Username: Usagi (available!)
┗━━━━━━━━┛
There was certainly no harm in talking in a few chatrooms to pass the time. You don’t have anyone else to talk to. It’s your first day awake and your only visitors were Shizuo and some guy named Izaya. They both felt familiar, though. You hope your memory will return soon.
Your door opens with a sudden “clunk!” sound. Enter, Shizuo. “You awake?”
You perk up. “Y-yes? Shizuo.” You close the phone and sit it on the small table within your reach. You notice that he was holding a small bento box. “How are you feeling?” He asks. “Still getting headaches. My legs hurt too.” You answered with a subtle frown. “You need to take your medicine.”
“I did.” You quip. “It just makes me tired, so I stalled.” You add. Shizuo raises his eyebrows. “You shoulda taken it earlier then. I hope you didn’t stay up for me.” He runs his hand through his hair. A small blush covers your face. “W-Well, you did say you would be back so…”
He shook his head. “Nah, that’s no excuse. Don’t sit around in pain ‘cus of me.” He then gives you the bento box. “You remember Shinra?”
“Thank you and no. Who is he?”
“Just a friend. He said he would stop by tomorrow. You think you’re up for it?”
You open the box and are welcomed with warm food that blesses your nose. It smells so much richer than the hospital food. “Yeah, sure.” You smile before digging in. From the corner of your eye, you see Shizuo has made himself comfortable. “You know visiting hours are almost over, right?”
“What are they gonna do? Throw me out?” The corner of his mouth upturns. You want to believe he’s joking but his voice and attitude sound serious. “They’re not gonna let you stay.” You frown.
“I’d like to see them try to force me out.”
Your blush at his determination to be with you. “So, you’ll stay overnight as well?”
“Yeah. Like hell I’m gonna leave you alone at a time like this.”
“Oh, Shizuo!” You squeeze your eyes shut, grinning so hard that your cheeks are sore. He’s so nonchalant with his words and you can’t help but be moved at how unintentionally he conveys his attraction towards you. “Huh? What?” He stares, rather confused at your behavior but your expression made him become flushed too. You place your hands on your cheeks. “I don’t know. You just sound rather romantic. I hope the rest of our relationship is like this.”
“Kind of…” He mutters. “I didn’t realize how much I take you for granted until I almost lost you. You deserve so much more.” He sounds sincere . You grin fades and you open your eyes. “Was the accident that bad?” You ask quietly. Shizuo nods. “Everything happened so fast. I’m just glad you’re alive.”
“Well, I’m glad that I have you to take care of me. I don’t remember much but, already, you’re a beautiful person!” You cheer, silently wishing you could leave this bed so that you could properly hug Shizuo. A small smile creeps up on his face. Even if you didn’t possess all of your memories, you are still somehow the person he fell in love with. He hopes that one day, he could marry you.
“Hey.” After a moment of silence, he calls you. “Think about some things you wanna do in Ikebururo. When you’re able to walk, I’ll take you.” Your eyes widen at that proposal. “Really? How thoughtful.”
Shizuo would be lying if he said he wasn’t still nervous right now. You seem to be okay now but he is still worried for your health. Soon, you catch him off guard.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Yeah.” He replies instantly, placing an innocent kiss full of desperation on your lips. There are no words or actions he can use to convey how happy he felt. The blonde man smelled of cigarettes. A smell you recognized. Your lips are moist and soft with a hint of chapstick. Tender. The way you grip his vest sends him to heaven. The bartender raises his hand to the back of your head, the new growth of your hair short and soft. Kissing felt like fireworks going off. Things could only get better from here. It seemed like Shizuo was a reliable enough partner for getting better.
For now.