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Chapter Text

Theseus turned to look at his family, standing there waiting to embrace him.

The villain lay helpless on the floor, frozen by Hypnos’s powers.

Theseus hugged his brothers and his dad, letting himself be Tommy, just for a moment.

“C'mon boys, let's go home.” Daedulus smiled, spreading his ebony-feathered wings.

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“CUT!”

Director Kristen Reaper screamed for what felt to Thomas like the thousandth time that day, although for once she wasn't wearing her trademark frown.

“Alright boys, that's a wrap. Go home and we'll see you tomorrow for filming episode two.” She flashed Thomas a rare smile, then turned to her husband.

“Thank God. If I'd had to be around you three any longer, I might've quit this show altogether.”

William Tone, who played Theseus’s beloved coworker and Tommy Za’s brother, grimaced as he looked at his co stars, before turning and leaving set.

Oliver Grey simply put his headphones on before walking off to get his Acheron/Technoblade wig taken off. The extensions were too long to even have Thomas look at them, let alone touch.

Philip Reaper at least had the decency to ignore Thomas as he left the set, choosing instead to talk to his beloved wife who had just screamed at everyone except her husband for 8 hours straight.

Thomas pulled his red hoodie up over his head as he walked onto the bus- his blond strands flapped into his eyes but he didn't care. Better uncomfortable hair than paparazzi.

It was no secret to anyone involved in the show that the four main actors, the ‘family’, all but despised each other. William spent his time teasing and insulting, Oliver barely spoke a word that wasn't scripted, and Philip only cared about his wife.

That was fine. Thomas was an adult now, he could handle being ignored.

The bus jerked forward and Thomas flailed for something to hold. As his face didn't hit the ground, he assumed he had caught something!

Unfortunately, that something was a muscular man who really didn't look happy.

Thomas didn't dawdle to get off that bus.

As he walked through the rain and bustle of the street to get to his apartment, he reminisced on when he thought the show would be his saviour.

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Broke and alone, Thomas wandered through shops, searching for anywhere that could hire him.

When the last door closed and the lights went out, he slumped to the floor and accepted fate.

Until something hit him in the face.

Thomas looked up in surprise- a flyer had fallen right into his lap.

‘ACTOR WANTED- BLOND MALE, 17-20
TV SERIES
CHARACTER: ‘TOMMY ZA’’

Thomas knew this was it. Fate had sent this audition his way, and who was he to deny the calling of his destiny?

He kept up that optimistic mindset for five weeks.

Through all the auditions and call backs.

Through costume check, and being measured for all the garments of Tommy Za.

Through receiving the script, and learning his millions of lines.

All the way until first read through.

He walked in, expecting a bustle, a community, friendships blooming.

He saw three bored faces.

It had been downhill from there. His co-stars only acknowledged him if they were making fun of him (William) or acting with him (Oliver).

Thomas quickly realised acting wasn't about the people, it was about the money.

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“I'm home!” Thomas called to his almost-empty apartment as he dumped his khaki satchel on the ground and slumped down on the ragged couch-bed.

His roommates came to join him.

“Hey Shroud! Hi Henry, how were your days?”

Shroud was a glossy black cat. Thomas still couldn't believe his luck when the aloof cat had walked into his shabby apartment, and refused to leave. She had no markings, except some white scribbles on her head that Tommy swore looked like a web.

Henry was exactly the opposite. An energetic ginger kitten that was no more presentable than the underside of Thomas's shoe. He jumped and meowed and never shut up, and yet Shroud treated him as a son.

“It's been a long day.” Thomas agreed, and closed his eyes.

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e̷̛̛̙̥̳͉͉͈̘̜̭̭̜̅̍̍͆̐͐̅̄̋̋̌͗̇̓̀̑̒́̆̀̀̅̄̓̂̍͆̉̆̀̄̿̀͂͂̔̀̄̆͗̕͘͜͝͠͠͝v̴̧̧̡̧̧̧̤̺̝͇̙͈̜̼̻̩͔̮͕̩̞̗̣̭̯͉̺̥͈̯̭̩̤̼͉̱̺̳̇̍̋̋̓͊͊̈̈́̌̄̀͋̌̾̏̊́̊͂̐͒́͑̉̃̍̋͆̋͛̓̀͊̽͘̕͜͜͜͝͝͠ȩ̵̡̡̢̧̺̮̩͕͚͈̱̪͚̭̻̮̥̯̠̩̼̣̰̼͇͇̜̱̣̣̰̤͚̼̹̭͔͓̻̗̽̊̌͛̉̎̚͜ͅͅr̷̡̹̗̫̠̗̟̜͔͙͔̖̤̟̹͕̱͇̻̦͓̼͉̩̰̘͙̯̱̬̻̪̳̝̳̜̤̳̰͎̜̔̊̆̒̋̽̈́͊̀͊͛́̓̽͒͊̔̐̿̔̂͗̕̚̚͜͜͜͝͝ͅͅͅy̷͔͊̈́̀̓̔̄̄͑̌̎̆̐́́̇͛͐̊͑̽̋̑̕̕̕͝ͅț̶̢̨̢̭̩̟̼̫̯̟͕͓̤̺͙̯͚̼͎̩̙̝̲͓̹͓͕̳͈̙̦͎̮͍̞̮̙͚͕͖̠͌̀͂̓͐̽̂͊̃́̉̓̅̀́͛̆̽͐̓̂̇̌̀̕͜͝͝ͅͅͅͅh̸̡̢̩̰̞̻̲̘̳̝͍̭̼̯̣̬̱̫̘͇̩̠̞̫͕̯̣̙̲̭̮̱̤͖̩̪̳̠͖̞͌̊̀̄͌̈́̔͝ͅͅͅį̴̢̢̨̨̢̢͎̦̜̭͎̮͇͚̭͙̱͕̻̮͍̫̯͖͔̩̖̤̖̞̯̞͈͓̈́̀̌ņ̷̪̼̠͈͖̝̣̗̫̬̪̬̦͕̇̈́̓̄̔͑̽̇̿̍̎̔̈̽͛̀͗̿͘͜ͅg̷̨̨̨̡̢̨̡̛͈͓̱̣̹͍͖̭̰̯̱̱̦̝͎̩̘̬̱̟̮̙̺̻̩͙̞̣͕̼̞͚̞̥͇̥̪̠̟̜͖͆̓̇̀̓͑̓͐͊̈́̀̒̏̓̅̀̑̎͋̈́̀̇̔̃̃̊̈́̚͘͝ͅͅ ̷̡̛͈͓̖̦̪̥̳̤̖̟̲͈̼͔̘̻̼͉͍̖͎̦̥̝̗͕̀̑͒̓̂̌̈̎̀̓͘͜͜͝͝g̷̢̡̨͚̗͕̠͙̰̲̰͔̝̤͙̞̗̲̖͍͚̘͚͈̫͓͍̲̙̬͔͙̳͔̟̗̝̖͕̠̹͎̦̀ͅo̷̡̧̧̢̨̨̨̬͕͓̪̫̯͚̗̘̯̩̜̪͇͕̩͔̥͈̥͖̮̫͍̼͉͖̞̦͓̬͇̞̗͖͗͊͂̌̃̀̐̉̿͑̄̎́͂͒̆̉͋͂̀̄͛͛̽̓̇͂̈́̂̓͂͑̐̃͌̊̃̑̕̚̚̚͜͝͝͝ͅḛ̸̢̡̫̝͈̙̜͔͚͉͎̜̻̦̣̟͔̯̪̟̫͉̦̫͇̰͍̱̱̳̭̲̞̭͔͎̮͇̝̠͉̮͚͎̆̄̈̈̎͂̐́͜ṣ̷̡̔̽̒̾̑̀̂̀͒͛̕̚͝ ̵̛̛̹͙̰̺͈̳̙͎̹̓̓̏͌́̓̿͛͐̉̈́̅̐̑̔̅͌̋͂͂̎́͛̄̆́͋͋͌̆͂̚͠͠͝a̷͔̥͔͚͇̱͎̝͖͇̩̙͇̙͚̤͖͙̪̦̯̭̗̱̥̙͕̗͍̖͇͇̹͉̣͕̦͛̄̽̏̓̈́̃̌̈́́͘͜͝͠͝ͅc̷̳̯̬̲̀̾͗̄̈́̔̋̈̒̔̾͆͂̇̿́̊̊̀͘̕c̷̨̧̨̨̨̧͓̦̬̩͖̣̺̳̞̳̭̼͈̫̲͍̬͙̺̦̜̝͎̮͉̖̭̪̯͖̤̜͎̞͎̽̍̀̊̓͜ǫ̵̛̩͚̬̺͉̂̊̀̾̈́̈́̀̃̾̄͑̑̈́̃͐͋͊̎̉̾͊͊̾́̆̈́̌͂̽̐̿̌́́̓͂̏́͌̽͘̚͘͠͝͝͝͝͝ŕ̸͖̟̖͔̝͕͚̻̗̫̻̝̣͓̊́͒͆͛̕d̶̡̛̛̛̪͕͈̜͉̙̫͓̖̲͙̥͎̖̱̙͓͍̦̔̓̔̉̆͐̓͗̾͗͆̽̀̈́͛͊͑̔̀̀̎͋̉͌̎̽̐̔͛̚̕̚̕͜͝ͅỉ̷̡̨̨̨̧͎͈͚͈͓̯̮̩̗̱̹̼͓̘̺̝̦͈̰̗̝̮̳͉̒̈́̍́͒̓̐̈́͗̆́́̌͑͒̈̈̈̒̌͆́́̈́͌̄̓̄̃͑̈͆͛͋̀͑̾̆́̃̀̇̚̚͘̚̚͜͝͠ͅn̵͈̩͙̲̟̲̘̞̜̩̭͕̹̤̹͕̺̬̗̼͓̳̒̉͛̀̑̃́̈́̄̿̒̉̀̊͐̃̋̾̚͠͝g̵̨̘͎͖͍͕̣͉̩̙̤͔͍̜̠͙̽̽̎̓̏̈́̓̏̊͒͐̿͆͌͒̇́̃̔̎͌̐̔͒͐͒͒́̂̈́̓͆͊̾̇̾́̽̎͆̈́̃̾̌̍̕̕̕͠ ̶̡̡͍͖̠̯͙̮̜͙͖̩͇̿̊͂͋͋͌͐̌͒͛͂̐̿͜͝͝ţ̶̛̞̤̹̦̖͎̭̝̱̤̍̄͐̊̑̔́͐̄͐͛͊͊̍̏͐͗͒̑̂̄͛͐͋̊̈́̅̏̒̋͊͛̈́̇̒̀͘͝ǫ̶̨̻͔͉̮͍̩͕͈̘͚̩͔̲̘͓̹̰̉̆̈́̔̾ ̴̛̼̫͚̞̠̣̇̈́͒̀̒̃̓͋̈́̄̉̈̑̓̆̈́̾̅͗̌̔̽͗͑͑͑̅̊̿́̈́̓́̔̓͗͜͠͝͝͠͝͠p̴͚̩̩͔̻͇̫͕͖͙̝͕̳̥̅́ḽ̵̛̼̰̻̫͕̓̊̆̆̓̎̆̃́̄̈́̐̇́̏͑̃͆͑̈́̎͂͂̿̉̍̽̃͌̾͌̚̕̕͘̕͝͝ą̶̙̘̠̤͍͇͔͚̪̘̙̭̞̜̠̬̲͖͈͎͖̱̹̜̟͍̮̭̬̘̱̦̽̂͆̋͊͐̽͌̾́͌̔͠n̸̨̧̢̧̢̨̤̳̳̹̬̯̼̫̙̹͇̳͚͍̝͉̰͚̪͚̭̭̖̟̻̠̞̫̺̲̺͕̞͎̾͐̌́̉̈́̈̃̇̌̌̓͗̿̐͆͘͜ͅͅ.̴̨͎̭̘͔̲̳͖̱̘̰̲̟̻̦̺͖̍͂.̸̨̢̛̠̘͙̩͈͖͇̘͉̣͔͇̠̭̥̦̙̲̭̭͔͕̖̖͍͎̻͇̏͑͊̓̿̓̑́̿̌͜͜͠.̵̧̖͉͐͂̓͋̊̇̅͒̆͗̈̀̿̉̿̍̉̊͆̅͘͝

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- ROOFTOP

THESEUS: On your right!

ACHERON DIVES IN THE DIRECTION THESEUS CALLS
HYPNOS: Runner!

THESEUS RUNS AFTER THE ESCAPING CRIMINAL AND THROWS HIM TO THE FLOOR

ACHERON: Hyp!

HYPNOS SPELLS THE GROUP OF CRIMINALS TO SLEEP, AND THE HEROES RELAX

ACHERON: Nice job guys. What a group we make, eh?

THESEUS: We’re such a-

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“BAHAHAHAHA!”

“CUT!”

Director Kristen glared at Thomas, who was laughing. Loudly. In a take.

“Sorry! Sorry Kri- Director, but seriously, us three? Siblings? Like hell!” Thomas continued laughing, but another stony glare from Kristen subdued him.

“From the end!” She called,annoyed.

“I’d die if you were my brother.” William whispered with a smirk into Thomas’s ear, before the cameras began to roll again.

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THESEUS: We're such a good team, must be our sibling bond!

HYPNOS RUFFLES THESEUS’S HAIR AFFECTIONATELY

SCENE TWO- HOME

THE THREE HEROES HAVE CHANGED INTO CIVILIAN FORM

TOMMY: I always forget that pink hair is natural. It's weird how you just have pink hai-

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“CUT! Thomas, stop going off script!”

“SORRY KRI-DIRECTOR!”

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TOMMY:I always forget that pink hair is natural. It's weird how you just have pink hai- that we have normal lives. Like, Tech can literally break his teacher's bones and yet he goes to uni like a normal person.

TECHNO: Some things you just can't learn from breaking bones. Like how to decode scary words like 2-methyl-hex-1-ene.

WILBUR: What the fu-

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“WILLIAM! THIS IS A CHILD'S TV SHOW!”

“SORRY DIRECTOR!”

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WILBUR: What the hell?

TOMMY: Someday I'll finish sixth form and I will not go back to school even if you paid me. Remind me again why you take chemistry and English when you have super strength?

TECHNO: It's enriching.

WILBUR AND TOMMY SHARE A DISBELIEVING GLANCE

SCENE 3- INTERVIEWS

TECHNO: My siblings? They're cool I guess. I just hope they stay out of jail until they graduate.

WILBUR: Tommy and Tech? Tommy's pretty annoying, I love him though. Tech is just… another level.

TOMMY: I love my brothers.

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“NOW SAY IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT!”

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TOMMY: I love my brothers. They're older than me by a bit, so I guess that sucks but I know they love me. And I love them.

END OF EPISODE

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T̷̳̝̼̓̌́̊̍̅͜

Chapter Text

EPISODE 3- DAD

SCENE ONE- HOME

WILBUR: Tommy, cut it out!

TOMMY: Come make me!

WILBUR AND TOMMY ARE RUNNING AROUND THE ROOM. TECHNO SITS, UNBOTHERED, READING ON THE SOFA. PHIL ENTERS

TOMMY CRASHES INTO PHIL

TOMMY: DAD! Um, I'm not doing anything?

PHIL, TO AUDIENCE: Sure he wasn't. He never is.

WILBUR, TO PHIL: Dad, he took my mask!

PHIL HOLDS OUT HIS HAND TO TOMMY, WHO RELUCTANTLY PLACES THE WHITE BLINDFOLD IN PHIL'S HAND.

PHIL: And you couldn't stop them doing this because..?

TECHNO: I was reading. Legend of Theseus, you know. Tommy, your namesake really isn't that great.

TOMMY, ANGRY: Hey! I wouldn't be named after someone uncool! Right Dad?

PHIL LOOKS TO THE AUDIENCE FOR HELP. NONE COMES, BECAUSE WE ARE A CAMERA.

PHIL: Wilbur, didn't you take Tommy's stuffed cow?

TOMMY: WHAT?

WILBUR RUNS

TOMMY PURSUES HIM

TECHNO [MONOTONE] : Well done Dad. Now Tommy will be rabid for the next thousand years.

HE TURNS THE PAGE OF HIS BOOK

PHIL: It's fine, he loves Will really. Besides, they-

HE IS CUT OFF BY A BEEPING NOISE

PHIL: Boys! Get ready, they found two villains on L'manburg Town Hall!

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Thomas was engrossed in his costume, fiddling with the long red sleeves that stretched over his middle finger, almost too tight. He watched as his ‘family’ got their makeup redone and was just about to check his script for his lines when-

“Hello! I'm Toby!”

Thomas turned to see a boy, about his age, maybe younger, smiling at him with his hand outstretched. A much taller person cowered behind him.

Thomas took Toby's hand and shook it politely, before it clicked.

“You must be the Hephaestus and Charon actors. Toby and-” Thomas scurried to remember the printed name on the cast list- “Ranboo?”

“That's us!” Toby smiled. “I'm Hephaestus, they're Charon. You play Theseus, right? That must be so cool! What about Hypnos’s actor? Are you two friends in real life? Hey, what's your number? Let's be friends! Ranboo and I…”

Toby's constant speech faded away as Ranboo steered him in the opposite direction of the obviously not interested Thomas. They shot him an apologetic gaze, to which Thomas replied with a fake smile.

“CAMERAS ROLLING IN 3, 2-”

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SCENE TWO- FIGHT

HYPNOS, DAEDALUS, THESEUS AND ACHERON LAND ON THE ROOFTOP THAT HEPHAESTUS AND CHARON ARE DESTROYING.

DAEDALUS: That's quite enough from you two. Surrender, or we'll have to resort to force.

HEPHAESTUS: The mighty Daedulus! Come to destroy the villains, just as the heroes always do! But what if…

HEPHAESTUS FAKE GASPS, THEN GIGGLES

HEPHAESTUS: …The villains destroy the perfect hero family!

COMBAT ENSUES. DAEDALUS ATTACKS HEPHAESTUS, CHARON AND ACHERON FIGHT AND HYPNOS DOTS BETWEEN THE TWO. THESEUS TRIES TO HELP, BUT IS CONTINUALLY HIT OUT OF THE FIGHT BY DAEDALUS.

DAEDALUS: Stay back Theseus! These villains are dangerous!

HEPHAESTUS DROPS A SMOKE BOMB, AND THE HEROES COUGH. THE VILLAINS DISAPPEAR, WITH ONLY PURPLE SPARKLES LEFT IN THEIR WAKE

THESEUS: They got away…

ACHERON: This time. I'll be surprised if they come back after the defeat they just faced.

SCENE THREE- CONFESSIONS OF A FATHER

IT IS LATE AT NIGHT. PHIL SITS IN THE LIVING ROOM ALONE, TALKING TO HIMSELF

PHIL: I love them really. Tommy is definitely way too energetic for his own good and Wilbur always winds him up, but Tech is alright. Plus they're my kids, and I have to love them or social services take them away.

PHIL LAUGHS AT HIS OWN JOKE

PHIL: They work better in hero form. Theseus’s telekinesis works well with Acheron’s strength, and Hypnos’s forced sleep is a good conversation ender if we're done with villains.

HE IS QUIET

PHIL: I'm just scared. Scared they'll get hurt, or that one day we'll fight a villain too strong and I'll have to watch helplessly as their lights fade…

PHIL: I'm probably just being stupid.

LIGHTS OUT

END OF EPISODE
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O̶̢̢̳̯͖̘̭̰̯̙͖̰̗̎̋̈́̒̈̕̕͜

Chapter Text

SCENE 1- FIGHT

THE HEROES ARE ENGAGED IN CONFLICT WITH HEPHAESTUS AND CHARON. AS THE FIGHT ENDS, THESEUS IS PUSHED OUT OF THE WAY AND THE VILLAINS TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY TO ESCAPE.

DAEDALUS: Good job boys. They won't be back for a while, I'm sure. Acheron, you should train with resource weapons when we get back. I want to utilise the rubble around us next fight.

ACHERON NODS

DAEDALUS: As for you Hypnos, you're good to go. Why don't you go work on your song?

HYPNOS SMILES AND GOES TO TALK TO ACHERON

THESEUS WAITS FOR HIS FEEDBACK EAGERLY

DAEDALUS: And Theseus…

DAEDALUS: Why don't you help your brothers?

THESEUS IS VISIBLY SAD, BUT NODS AND SMILES.

SCENE 2- BROTHERS AND BOXES

TECHNO AND TOMMY ARE DIGGING THROUGH BOXES

TOMMY: [HUMOUROUS] This is nice. Family bonding, y’know?

TECHNO: Yep. Hold this, will you?

TOMMY TAKES THE LARGE BOX IN BOTH ARMS

TOMMY: So, what are we looking for?

TECHNO PLACES ANOTHER BOX IN TOMMY'S ARMS

TECHNO: My old training setup. I had loads of rubble pieces somewhere. Super-heavy, great for training. No idea where they got to.

TOMMY IS VISIBLY SHAKING FROM THE WEIGHT OF THE BOXES

TOMMY: No idea. Hey, I think I hear Will calling. Be right back!

TOMMY DROPS THE BOXES AND RUNS OUT

TECHNO: Hey, there they are!

SCENE 3- MELODIES

WILBUR: Hey, Tommy! I'm working on this new song, what do you think?

WILBUR STARTS SINGING. IT IS FRANKLY, AWFUL.

TOMMY: That's… amazing, Will. I especially loved the fifteenth verse about your breakup.

WILBUR: I know, right? You'd never guess, but I actually have never been through a breakup!

TOMMY: Wow. Really. I never would have guessed.

WILBUR SMILES

WILBUR:Anyway, want to help me write the third bridge?

TOMMY: Um, I have to get back to Techno. He needs my help.

WILBUR IS DISAPPOINTED

TOMMY: I'll be back!

WILBUR: Great! I'll get the melody sorted.

TOMMY: Great…

TOMMY RUNS OUT

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Thomas sat slumped in his chair. He kept his head down, skimming his script. This was no doubt the type of episode he despised- where Tommy was made to look like a child. The boy was 16, not 6!

“Hey, Thomas!” Toby smiled as he walked up. Thomas's face smiled and yet his mood plummeted.

“Toby. Again. Hi.” Thomas didn't try to disguise his boredom, he had just run across the set twice and he really didn't want to deal with Toby's relentless optimism.

“I just wanted to give you my number! I was hoping we'd be friends!” Toby gave Thomas a slip of paper with some numbers scrawled on it.
“You can add me and I'll give you Ranboo’s number too, we can be the young kids on set and hopefully have a bond for years and then-”

Thomas's head hurt. This guy was thinking years into the hypothetical future, and yet Thomas barely thought to the next day aside from script and set times.

“Look Toby, you seem like a great guy but I don't want to be friends. I don't want to be friends with you, or Ranboo. I don't want to be friends for years to come, or even for minutes to come. So please, leave me alone.”

Toby's face dropped. Thomas hadn't even realised he'd shouted, or how cruel his wording sounded.

“Okay.” Toby finally got the hint, shutting up. He dropped the paper at Thomas's feet and ran off. Thomas decided not to hear the muffled sobs and turned up his headphones.

And just to top it all off, William walked past Thomas right as Toby ran off. The glare from William made Thomas sure that their brotherly bond was not only nonexistent, but well and truly burned.

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MONTAGE

THE NEXT FEW MINUTES IS A MONTAGE OF TOMMY SWITCHING BETWEEN HIS TWO BROTHERS. TOMMY STRUGGLES WITH BOTH TASKS BUT WANTS TO BE INCLUDED. THE MONTAGE ENDS WITH TOMMY DROPPING ONE OF TECHNO'S BOXES ON WILBUR'S FOOT.

SCENE 4- UNDERSTANDING

WILBUR: OWWWWW!

TOMMY: Wil- I'm so sorry, it was an accident!

TECHNO AND PHIL ENTER THE ROOM

TECHNO: Tommy, where's my- oh.

WILBUR IS STILL VERY MUCH IN PAIN. THE BOX IS STILL ON HIS FOOT.

TECHNO LIFTS THE BOX OFF WILBUR'S FOOT.

PHIL: Wilbur, are you okay mate?

TECHNO: How did this even get on your foot?

THE CONCERNED MUTTERING INCREASES IN VOLUME AND TOMMY IS STEADILY IGNORED

TOMMY: STOP!

EVERYONE TURNS TO SEE TOMMY CLOSE TO TEARS

TOMMY: I dropped the box. I dropped it because all day, I've been trying to be useful to you. I tried to help Tech, even though my arms burnt holding those boxes. I tried to help Wil, even though his songs hurt my ears. I've been trying to help all day just to be included and I'm still being ignored! I took on too many tasks just to be noticed and you still act like I'm not part of this family!

PHIL: Tommy… we never meant to make you feel like that. We were just so caught up in fighting the villains we never thought about how you'd feel. But that's still not an excuse. We're sorry Tommy.

THE FAMILY HUGS

END OF EPISODE
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In Thomas's opinion, Tommy was well within his rights to scream at the end of the episode. Unfortunately, due to the show being a kids show, it had to be resolved quickly and easily. Can't have kids thinking they're allowed to feel ‘bad’ emotions, right?

“Thomas.”

Thomas turned to see Ranboo. Aw shit, he thought he got rid of those two. Seeing Ranboo just brought back his guilt.

“I'm not here to make small talk, or beg you to be friends. I'm not Toby. I'm me. And the way I do things, is that if someone hurts my friends, I hurt them. So my message to you, Thomas, is that people have feelings.”

Thomas tried to speak, to leave, to do anything, but Ranboo kept talking.

“I don't care if you want to be friends, enemies or just ignore him, but you're going to apologize. Toby has been nothing but kind to you, and you need to return the sentiment.”

With that, Ranboo walked away. Thomas stood in stunned silence as he clutched Toby's number in his hand.

✯ ✯ ✯
TOBY — THOMAS

THOMAS: I'm sorry. I was a dick. It's Thomas btw. Ranboo's a good friend.

TOBY IS TYPING…

TOBY: you remind me of a raccoon LOL

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: thank you?

TOBY IS TYPING…

TOBY: ranboo is more of an owl. and i'm a bee!

THOMAS CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘TO-BEE’

TOBY IS TYPING…

TOBY: A HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

TOBY CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘RACCOON BOY TOMZ’
✯ ✯ ✯

M̷̠̹̰̙͇̬̺̯̓̇̓́̎̏͠

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- MORNING

THOMAS ENTERS THE KITCHEN. HE IS VISIBLY TIRED.

THOMAS: Morning…

WILBUR: Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed!

PHIL: Be nice Wil. Tommy, we're out of cereal I'm afraid. If you could go buy some, we'd appreciate it.

TECHNO MOVES HIS BOWL OF CEREAL SLIGHTLY CLOSER TO HIMSELF.

TOMMY: [TIRED] Fine. Anything else?

PHIL: Nope, that's it. Tech, Wil, let's go train. You're slacking.

PHIL, WILBUR AND TECHNO EXIT. TOMMY IS LEFT ALONE.

TOMMY: Guess I'm going to Tesco.

SCENE 2- SHOPPING

TOMMY IS AT A SELF-CHECKOUT.

MACHINE: Please scan an item to start.

TOMMY SCANS THE CEREAL BOX

MACHINE: Please scan an item to start.

TOMMY SCANS THE BOX AGAIN

MACHINE: Item not detected. Please scan an item to start

TOMMY: What is wrong with this machine?

TOMMY SCANS THE ITEM A FEW MORE TIMES BEFORE VIOLENTLY PLACING THE BOX IN THE BAGGING AREA

MACHINE: Item detected in the bagging area.

MACHINE MAKES A LOUD BEEPING NOISE

MACHINE: Scanned item detected. Total: £89.65

TOMMY: How? I only scanned a box of cereal?

TOMMY PRESSES A BUTTON

MACHINE: Adding items. Total now £172.84. Please insert cash or select payment type.

TOMMY: I give up.

TOMMY SCANS CARD

MACHINE: Printing receipt for ‘189 BOXES OF SUGAR SHAPES’

TOMMY: I hate self checkout.

SCENE 3- FIGHT

THESEUS ENTERS THE FIGHT SCENE. DAEDULUS, ACHERON AND HYPNOS ARE FIGHTING WITH FIVE ROBBERS.

THESEUS: How do you get out this fast? I literally just went to buy cereal.

ACHERON: We got an alert, and didn't think we'd have time to wait for you.

THESEUS: Thanks for thinking of me, I guess. So, what's the pla-

THESEUS IS HIT AND COLLAPSES

SCENE FADES TO BLACK

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Toby actually wasn't that bad. Thomas struggled to remember why he seemed so bad in the first place. Since they'd exchanged numbers, Thomas learnt about 5000 new facts about various subjects and also discovered Ranboo is much more vocal over text than in person.

Thomas spotted Toby was coming over to talk. He had to admit, Toby was growing on him. Who would've guessed that the quirky boy would have become so important to him so fast?

Thomas remembered he'd saved a meme to show Toby. Sure, he could've sent it in the group chat they'd affectionately dubbed ‘the fellows’, but hearing Toby laugh was much preferable to the laughing emojis he seemed to love sending whenever possible, and in large amounts.

“Thomas.”

That wasn't Toby's voice.

Thomas looked up to see William Tone stood in front of him. For once he wasn't wearing his trademark smirk, but the glare he gave Thomas was arguably worse. Thomas racked his brain for a reason why William would be so mad at him, but found none. The two hardly interacted off set, to Thomas's relief.

“Yes, William? Can I help you?” Thomas tried his best to keep his voice devoid of emotion, but William's piercing brown eyes destroyed any hope he had of not reacting.

“Why the fuck do you think it's okay to scream at Ranboo?”

Right. That. Wait, that had nothing to do with William?

Thomas tried to talk but was cut off by William.

“You were horrible to Ranboo, horrible to Toby and have literally no friends here. They were probably just trying to help you but no, the star of the show doesn't need anything but his phone and a fake smile for the cameras. Tell me Thomas, do you even have any friends off-set? Or are you just a pathetic fool outside of work too?”

Damn. Thomas knew he'd been completely out of line to Ranboo and Toby, but did he really act that aloof. Was that all people saw him as, some entitled actor who thought others below him? It was true, Thomas didn't have any friends, but he didn't act that lonely, did he?

“Excuse me, we're his friends?”

Thomas looked up. His saviours, ironically, were the very people William was trying to defend.

“Excuse me?” William looked rather confused, which in a less depressing situation, Thomas might have laughed at.

“Yeah. We're his friends. So all that shit you just sprouted about him being a pathetic excuse for a human being is utter lies. Because we don't think so, and to be honest, our opinion probably matters a hell of a lot more than some nobody who is literally never nice to Thomas. I mean seriously, we've been here a week and you've been mean to Thomas in literally every interaction with him! I'd give you a medal, but I don't have one that says ‘Massive Dickhead’.”

William was speechless. Thomas forgot how quickly Toby could talk when he was passionate about something, and it seemed like William did too, with the way he hurried off.

“Are you okay?” Ranboo asked. Their voice was calm and quiet, unlike Toby. It was comforting.

“I'm fine. Damn Toby, you really destroyed William.” Thomas laughed, to which Toby replied with a big smile.

“So much for brothers, am I right?”

Thomas smiled and thought maybe, just maybe, he had some friends after all.

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SCENE 4- HEALING

SCENE FADES IN FROM BLACK

PHIL: He's awake! Quick Wil, bring me some more soup.

TOMMY BLINKS

TOMMY: …dad?

PHIL SMILES

PHIL: Yep. It's me, and Tech and Wil are just on the way now.

TOMMY LOOKS AROUND

TOMMY: What happened?

TECHNO:[ENTERING] You got hit. One of those robbers knocked you out, so we left them and brought you home.

TECHNO LIES A BLANKET OVER TOMMY

WIL: Here's some soup. We were really worried about you, Tommy.

TOMMY SMILES

TOMMY: Really?

PHIL: Of course! You're our family, and we never forget family.

FAMILY HUGS

PHIL: Now what shall we watch? Patient's choice, of course.

TOMMY: Hmm…

END OF EPISODE

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M̷̠̹̰̙͇̬̺̯̓̇̓́̎̏͠

Chapter Text

✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: guys we're finally in an episode together :O

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: did you check the script? let me watch my movie smh

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: no. no movie for you.

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: >:(

✯ ✯ ✯

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SCENE 1- SURPRISE

BLACK SCREEN

PHIL: You can open your eyes now…

TOMMY OPENS HIS EYES

TOMMY: [CONFUSED] Movie tickets?

PHIL: I thought we needed some family bonding time, so I booked us to go see ‘Heroes of L’manburg!’

TECHNO: … isn't that based off of us?

PHIL: Be quiet and enjoy your movie.

WILBUR: [MONOTONE] Thank you Dad for this gift of your time.

PHIL: I can still take away the tickets.

ALL BOYS: No, no, no!

SCENE TWO- PREVIEW

THE FAMILY ARE SAT IN A LINE. WILBUR, THEN TOMMY, THEN PHIL, THEN TECHNO

ADVERT: Have you ever felt lost? Depressed? Like you'd never be happy again?

TOMMY: This movie is PG-13, why is my life being advised

AUDIENCE: SHHHHH

ADVERT: Side effects may include: vomiting, dizziness, headache, fever, coughing, sneezing, lightheadedness and death. Please handle responsibly.

PHIL: [WHISPER] Boys, we've got an alert. Rooftop in the west area, we need to go now.

TECHNO: Good. I hate the adverts.

SCENE 3- FIGHT

HEPHAESTUS:[SWEETLY] Hello again! It's been ages since we've seen each other! I've missed you!

ACHERON: Cut the act and let's fight.

HEPHAESTUS: Why? Got somewhere to be?

ACHERON AND HYPNOS FIGHT HEPHAESTUS WHILE DAEDALUS AND THESEUS FIGHT CHARON

CHARON PHASES THROUGH DAEDULUS’S ATTACKS, WHILE HEPHAESTUS SUMMONS METAL TO FALL ON ACHERON

THESEUS: This is going to take a while…
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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: just me who thinks Theseus is cooler than Hephaestus?

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: you've done it now

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: he's still typing. Thomas you're about to get read to filth

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: something, something, freedom of speech?

TO-BEE: right listen here you are so incredibly wrong you don't even know, Hephaestus is so much cooler than Theseus don't even get me started… READ MORE

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: help you made him go over character limit XD

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: YOU READ THAT FAR?????

✯ ✯ ✯

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SCENE 4- MOVIE, FINALLY

MOVIE: I am Theseus, and I'm about to destroy you with my sword!

TOMMY: [WHISPER] I don't have a sword?

MOVIE: Quick, Acheron! Put him to sleep!

WILBUR: [WHISPER] Hey! That's my power!

MOVIE: Come on team! Our leader, Hypnoticer, will save us with his wings!

PHIL AND WILBUR: [WHISPER] What?

FAMILY: I hate this movie.

AUDIENCE: SHHHHHH!

PHIL: Boys, I'm afraid we're needed again.

TECHNO: Good. For a budget this big, they've completely forgotten how long my hair is.

SCENE 5- FIGHT… AGAIN?

HEPHAESTUS: Hey again! Sorry to ruin your plans, but I thought I should be included!

CHARON: Let's finish what we started.

THE FIGHT CONTINUES LIKE EARLIER, BUT THE FAMILY ARE CLEARLY IN WORSE SHAPE. ACHERON GETS HIT WITH METAL, HYPNOS CAN ONLY MAKE HEPHAESTUS FALL ASLEEP FOR A SECOND, DAEDULUS IS TOO TIRED TO FLY, AND THESEUS CAN'T FOCUS ENOUGH TO USE HIS POWERS

HEPHAESTUS: Isn't this fun! Although you four seem to be enjoying it a lot less that us… slacking off, are we?

THIS GIVES THE FAMILY FERVOUR TO FINISH THE FIGHT

CHARON: This isn't the last you'll see of us.

CHARON AND HEPHAESTUS EXIT

THESEUS: Let's go finish this movie.

SCENE 6- MOVIE, WAIT, NO.

THE FAMILY ENTER THE CINEMA. IT IS DARK, AND NO ONE IS INSIDE.

PHIL: I'm sorry boys, I just wanted to give us some family time. But I picked a bad movie and we couldn't even watch it because we were busy fighting.

WILBUR: Dad? It's not your fault. Besides, it was pretty funny to watch how people see us. And I sincerely enjoyed the part where I lead the team.

PHIL RUFFLES WILBUR'S HAIR AFFECTIONATELY

TECHNO: Wilbur's right. It's not your fault the villains attacked.

TOMMY: Besides, we did spend all day together!

FAMILY HUG

END OF EPISODE

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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: toby how do you get your costume on. like genuinely the thing is just covered in tiny cogs and steampunk details. I'm not even allowed to breathe on it

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: with a lot of struggling. There's a reason we film all my scenes in a chunk. also Ranboo's is so easy to wear it's actually annoying.

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: hey I literally just wear funky purple silk. it's shiny snakeskin pattern okay it's cute >:( also Thomas don't act like your costume isn't easy to wear. You have a red long sleeve top and white jeans, come on.

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: THE SLEEVES GO OVER MY MIDDLE FINGER! IT TAKES EFFORT! also my civilian costume is so much worse I cringe whenever I wear that devil horned woolen hat. top is cute though

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: forever sad we don't get a civilian look :((((

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: maybe next season

✯ ✯ ✯

Y̷̭̬͔͔͚̫̬̹̦͚̓̋̂͊̾̀̉̆̊͜͜͠

Chapter Text

SCENE 1- TRAINING FOR TRIUMPH

TOMMY AND TECHNO ARE FIGHTING. PHIL AND WILBUR WATCH.

TOMMY: I'm going to win! Look at me Dad, I'm winning-

TECHNO SWEEPS TOMMY'S LEG AND HE FALLS TO THE FLOOR

TOMMY: OW!

TECHNO: Tommy! You didn't pay attention, I didn't realise you weren't…

PHIL LIFTS TOMMY

PHIL: That's it. Too many injuries for you, you're sitting out all day.

TOMMY: [WHINING] Noooooooo!

WILBUR: [MIMICKING] Yesssss!

PHIL WATCHES AS WILBUR AND TECHNO FIGHT. TOMMY POUTS

TECHNO FLIPS WILBUR ONTO THE FLOOR

TOMMY JUMPS UP

TOMMY: I want to do that!

PHIL: Absolutely not. You're too young.

TOMMY: I'm 16!

PHIL: Exactly. You're a baby.

PHIL SMILES AS TOMMY SCOWLS

TOMMY: I’ll show you a baby!

TOMMY RUNS FOR PHIL. PHIL TRIPS HIM.

PHIL: I'm waiting.

TOMMY SCOWLS EVEN MORE

TECHNO AND WILBUR LAUGH

PHIL'S WATCH BEEPS

PHIL: Fight three blocks off. Techno, Wilbur, get changed. Tommy-

TOMMY: Yes?

PHIL: Stay home.

TOMMY: WHAT?

PHIL, TECHNO AND WILBUR LEAVE

TOMMY: I'm not staying home. I have as much right to fight as much as they do!

TOMMY RUNS OFF

SCENE 2- FIGHT (I KNOW, IT'S LIKE THE TENTH FIGHT THIS SEASON)

TWO CRIMINALS ARE RUNNING FROM ACHERON, HYPNOS AND DAEDALUS

DAEDALUS: Give up and we won't hurt you!

CRIMINAL 1: Shut up, old bird!

CRIMINAL 2: Yeah, old bird!

HYPNOS: Ew. I hate this interaction already.

FIGHT ENSUES

ACHERON: Hypnos, put them to sleep!

HYPNOS PREPARES TO PUT THE CRIMINALS TO SLEEP

THESEUS RUNS IN AND HITS THE CRIMINALS

THESEUS TRIPS AND FALLS, KNOCKING HIMSELF OUT

HYPNOS: Theseus!

CRIMINALS RUN AWAY

DAEDALUS: I told him not to push himself. Come on boys, let's go get him to bed.

ACHERON LIFTS THESEUS. THESEUS MUTTERS UNDER HIS BREATH IN A SLEEPY STUPOR.

THESEUS: Don't leave me… I want to help…

THE FAMILY ARE QUIET

DAEDALUS: Let's go.

SCENE 3- UNDERSTANDING

TOMMY STIRS

PHIL IS SAT ON TOMMY'S BED. TOMMY IS IN THE BED. HE LOOKS AROUND TO SEE TECHNO LEANED AGAINST THE DOORFRAME AND WILBUR SAT ON THE BEANBAG IN THE FAR CORNER

TOMMY: Oh no… I'm so sorry! The criminals got away, and it's all my fault…

PHIL: What?

TOMMY: I ruined the job!

PHIL: Tommy… we don't care.

TOMMY: …what?

TECHNO: Sure, you messed up, but you also got hurt and have been out for hours. We were worried about you, not the criminals.

WILBUR: Yeah. Plus you really messed up that leg of yours. I could've woken you up, but it would've taken a lot more energy. Meaning you really needed to be unconscious. That's not less important because the job went haywire.

TOMMY: Really?

FAMILY: Of course!

TOMMY HUGS PHIL. WILBUR AND TECHNO JOIN THE HUG

PHIL: This does mean you're on bed rest for the next week though.

TOMMY: NOOOOO!

END OF EPISODE

✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: wait what even is hypnos power

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: idk like putting people to sleep or some shit you think I know? bro I barely know that my character has telekenisis

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: I know no one asked but I can phase through walls and stuff :O

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: I actually knew that one! I heard Clementine from special effects bitching about how annoying it is for editing

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: I have like metalkenisis or some shit I think

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: I think it's called ferrokenisis

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: nerd

TO-BEE: nerd

✯ ✯ ✯

̴̨̨̖̞̪͎̞͈̻̯̠̯̺̯̗͔͉̖̻̭̝̭̰̦͇̒͗̔͛̑̉̏͐̅̽͆͗̆̒̐̉̊̿̔͋͊̚͘͝͠Y̵̝͚͕̤͋̒͛̂̔͂̿̂͆̀̍̈

Chapter Text

SCENE 1- SUSTENANCE

TOMMY: Right! Time for a lovely breakfast of- OW!

TOMMY COLLAPSES. HE APPEARS TO HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT HE HAS INJURED HIS LEG.

TOMMY: Okay. New plan.

CUT TO TOMMY IN THE KITCHEN, USING A MOP AS A MAKESHIFT CRUTCH

TOMMY: Now for breakfast! Toast, deploy!

THE TOAST DOES NOT DEPLOY

TOMMY: Toast, deploy?

THE TOAST DOES STILL NOT DEPLOY. SURPRISINGLY TO TOMMY, TOAST CANNOT TOAST ITSELF.

TOMMY RELUCTANTLY PLACES THE TOAST IN THE TOASTER

TOMMY: Now, shall I have jam or butter… I think I'll have…

TOMMY LIFTS THE SUGAR JAR IN HAPPINESS

TOMMY: Sugar!

TOMMY TALKS TO HIMSELF AS HE SPREADS COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF SUGAR ON HIS TOAST

TOMMY: Dad never let me have sugar on my toast, but I knew it would be amazing!

TOMMY TAKES A BITE

TOMMY: Delicious!

SCENE 2- ENTERTAINMENT

TOMMY HAS FINISHED HIS TOAST. HE LOOKS RATHER GREEN

TOMMY: Maybe I shouldn't have had so much sugar…

TOMMY FLOPS ONTO THE COUCH

TOMMY: Now, what can I do?

TOMMY TURNS ON THE GAMES CONSOLE

TOMMY: Now what games can I play…

THERE IS ONE GAME ON THE CONSOLE. TOMMY CLICKS ON IT IN EXCITEMENT.

CONSOLE: Exercise Training Mode!

CONSOLE: Select difficulty: Hard, Extreme or Unbeatable!

TOMMY: Wait, no, go back-

TOMMY FRANTICALLY PRESSES BUTTONS ON THE CONTROLLER

CONSOLE: Unbeatable difficulty selected!

CONSOLE: 3, 2, 1, BEGIN!

TOMMY IS THROWN OFF THE COUCH AS IT BECOMES A COUCH-ROBOT. THE COUCH-ROBOT ADVANCES TOWARDS TOMMY QUICKLY

COUCH-ROBOT: Destroy… Destroy… Destroy

TOMMY: No! Don't destroy! Back! Close game!

THE ROBOT ADVANCES ON TOMMY

TOMMY: Reset? Pause? Off?

THE ROBOT IS VERY CLOSE TO TOMMY, ABOUT TO PUNCH HIM

TOMMY: STOP!

THE ROBOT FREEZES

COUCH-ROBOT: Game paused. Continue, or End?

TOMMY: End!

COUCH-ROBOT: Unbeatable difficulty selected. Password required to End.

TOMMY: Password… Um, can I have a hint?

COUCH-ROBOT: Hint selected. ‘Favorite Child’

TOMMY SMILES

TOMMY: Password is Tommy.

COUCH-ROBOT: Wrong.

TOMMY'S SMILE WAVERS

TOMMY: Password is… Techno?

COUCH-ROBOT: Wrong.

TOMMY GRIMACES

TOMMY: Password is Wilbur.

COUCH-ROBOT: Wrong. One attempt left before gamemode resumes.

TOMMY: What? But Dad doesn't have anymore kids…

TOMMY THINKS DEEPLY

TOMMY: If this is right, I'm going to kill Dad.

TOMMY: Password is Phil.

COUCH-ROBOT: Correct. Returning to COUCHmode.

THE COUCH-ROBOT BECOMES A REGULAR COUCH ONCE MORE. TOMMY LIES DOWN ON IT AND FLINCHES. IN THE FEAR, HE FORGOT ABOUT HIS LEG.

TELEVISION: This just in- Heroes Daedalus, Hypnos and Acheron fight criminals! But where is Theseus?

TOMMY: Stuck at home, that's where. Wish I could be there,but unfortunately my leg is broken in two.

TELEVISION: Sources say that Theseus may have become a villain after his recent injury.

TOMMY: WHAT?

END OF EPISODE

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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: what flowers dya reckon our characters would be

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: hephaestus is a sunflower. no I'm not taking criticism

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: charon would probably be a lily of the valley. they're super pretty and also translucent but also very toxic

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: hear me out- the family are all hyacinths. in their central colours obviously. tommy is red, wilbur is yellow, techno is pink

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: and phil? what's he?

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: white hyacinth. no idea why he just screams white hyacinth to me

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: why are you all hyacinths. what's the symbolism here

RACCOON BOY TOMZ IS TYPING…

RACCOON BOY TOMZ: they symbolise power, forgiveness and joy. but also sorrow. sounds like a hero don't you think? also why the fuck is hephaestus a sunflower. where's your logic there?

TO-BEE IS TYPING…

TO-BEE: i like sunflowers

OWLBOO IS TYPING…

OWLBOO: that is exactly the logic I expect from you two

OWLBOO CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘RED HYACINTH’

OWLBOO CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘SUNFLOWER’

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: join the squad then

RED HYACINTH CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘PURPLE LILY OF THE VA’

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: fuck I forgot about character limits

SUNFLOWER CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘PURPLE VALLEY’

PURPLE VALLEY IS TYPING…

PURPLE VALLEY: close enough

✯ ✯ ✯

Ợ̵̡̛̹̰̝͈͈̜̟̲̬̗͈̼̑̍͑̉̓͊̃̋̇̂͌̐̓͗̔̾̀͗̐̂͐̆͑͌̂́̿̿̚͘̕̕͘͠͝͝͝ͅ

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- SUNRISE

TOMMY SITS IN FRONT OF A GRAVESTONE. IT IS EARLY MORNING AND STILL DARK. HIS SPEECH IS PUNCTUATED BY SOBS.

TOMMY: Hey… Mum. How are you? It's been a while. Three years, to be exact. Not much has changed, to be honest. Dad is still the leader of our little superhero group. Techno's still an emotionless rock who spends all his time fighting. Wilbur's still a cringe musician who spends all his time feeling better than everyone else. And me… I'm still just me. Tommy. The child of the heroes. I'm sixteen now, but I'm still the child to everyone else. Even you. You haven't seen me since I was thirteen. I miss you. I wish you were here. You always made me feel like I wasn't just the youngest. Like I was somebody. But now… you're gone. Today is always the hardest day for all of us.

TOMMY GETS UP AND LEAVES. THE SUN BEGINS TO RISE BEHIND THE GRAVESTONE.

SCENE TWO- UNFINISHED SYMPHONY

WILBUR SITS ON HIS BED AND PLAYS HIS GUITAR

WILBUR:
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the tube lines
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the rails
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the tube line
There's a reason
London puts barriers on the rails
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the tube line
There's a reason
They fail

WILBUR SOBS

WILBUR: That was supposed to be your song. You were supposed to be the first one to hear it. Now you never will.

WILBUR CONTINUES SOBBING AND TURNS AWAY FROM THE CAMERA

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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: help. william is laughing maniacally. he's just filmed his scene where he mourns the death of his mother :o

PURPLE VALLEY IS TYPING…

PURPLE VALLEY: L

SUNFLOWER IS TYPING…

SUNFLOWER: any episode without us is bound to be shit. also this episode is just explaining to kids what death is. boring

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: fuck you guys I'm suffering here >:(

SUNFLOWER IS TYPING…

PURPLE VALLEY IS TYPING…

SUNFLOWER: L

PURPLE VALLEY: L

✯ ✯ ✯

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SCENE 3- OVERWORKING

TECHNO IS TRAINING ARCHERY. HE IS EMOTIONLESS. SILENT. THE AUDIENCE CAN ONLY TELL HE IS EMOTIONALLY STRUGGLING DUE TO THE WAY EVERY ARROW GOES ASTRAY.

WHEN TECHNO REALISES HE HAS RUN OUT OF ARROWS, HE WALKS OVER TO THE TARGET.

HE DOES NOT PICK UP THE ARROWS, BUT INSTEAD TRACES THE HEART CARVED INTO THE BULLSEYE IN THE TARGET.

HE CANNOT BRING HIMSELF TO BREAK THE HEART.

AS HE WALKS BACK TO SHOOT AGAIN, A SINGULAR TEAR RUNS DOWN HIS CHEEK.

SCENE 4- A JAGGED SCAR, SLOWLY HEALING

THE FAMILY SIT IN THE LIVING ROOM TOGETHER. THEY SIT IN SILENCE, MOURNING ALONE.

TOMMY: …dad?

THE FAMILY ALL TURN TO TOMMY

PHIL: Yes, Tommy?

TOMMY: Can you tell us the story? I know I ask for it every time but… it helps to hear about her.

PHIL SMILES.

PHIL: Okay then. Sit down, the lot of you.

TECHNO LIES ON THE SOFA. WILBUR PUSHES HIM SO THEY BOTH SIT COMFORTABLY. TOMMY SITS IN-BETWEEN THEM, SQUISHING THEM ALL TOGETHER.

PHIL: Once upon, well 24 years ago-

TOMMY: You're so old.

PHIL GLARES PLAYFULLY

PHIL: I met a wonderful woman. And three years later, we met Techno and Wilbur. And two years after that-

TOMMY: Me!

PHIL SMILES

PHIL: Yes, you. She loved you all so much. And then…

PHIL IS QUIET

TECHNO: I miss her.

PHIL: Yeah. I miss her too.

WILBUR: We all do.

THE FAMILY SHARE A HUG, AND THE EPISODE FADES TO BLACK

END OF EPISODE

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Ù̵̩͈̮̮̟͎̖͍͂͛͊̀͆̓̅̓̅͆̊̀̚͝

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- A CHANGE OF PLAN

TOMMY RUNS THROUGH THE HOUSE UNTIL HE REACHES THE KITCHEN

TOMMY: Today's the day! Our beach day! The day we finally get to spend together as a family, with no running off to be heroes!

PHIL, TECHNO AND WILBUR LOOK AT HIM BLANKLY

TOMMY: Come on! We're wasting daylight! Techno, get out of your pajamas! Wilbur, finish your cereal! Dad-

PHIL: Tommy…

TOMMY STOPS. THE SMILE DROPS FROM HIS FACE

TOMMY: What?

TECHNO: Have you looked outside?

TOMMY PULLS BACK THE CURTAINS. IT IS RAINING HEAVILY.

TOMMY IS SILENT

PHIL: Sorry mate. Looks like we'll have to do a beach day another time.

WILBUR OFFERS TOMMY CEREAL. TOMMY TAKES IT WORDLESSLY.

PHIL: So, what shall we do today?

WILBUR: I have a song I want to work on. It'll probably take most of the day, so I'll leave you three to do family stuff.

WILBUR EXITS

TECHNO: I should probably go train.

TECHNO EXITS

PHIL: Well… we can still do something together. Right, Tommy?

TOMMY: Actually, I don't really feel like doing anything. I'm going to go play Minecraft.

PHIL: Oh. Okay. Have fun.

SCENE TWO- A PLAN

TOMMY LIES ON THE FLOOR

TOMMY: I'm bored.

THERE IS NO RESPONSE

TOMMY: What do you even do in the rain? Stupid rain! If it wasn't raining, we could've gone to the beach and done normal family stuff! But no, the sky decided to spit on me. I hate you, sky!

TOMMY IS QUIET

TOMMY: What do I do now? What do people normally do when it rains?

TOMMY THINKS, THEN REALIZATION DAWNS ON HIS FACE AFTER A COMICALLY LONG LENGTH OF TIME

TOMMY: I've got it! Dad! Wilbur! Techno! I have a plan!

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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: this is such a filler episode fml

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: why are so many episodes about family bonding

PURPLE VALLEY IS TYPING…

PURPLE VALLEY: ikr like give me and toby some screen time please

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: please :( i miss you guys. set is so boring without you. im seriously considering befriending oliver grey just to avoid being lonely

SUNFLOWER IS TYPING…

SUNFLOWER: you must be desperate. good luck tho fr

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: i hate you

✯ ✯ ✯

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SCENE 3- JOY AND WHIMSY

TOMMY: Come on!

PHIL: Tommy, it's raining? Where are we going?

TOMMY: Here!

TOMMY PLAYS SOME MUSIC AND BEGINS TO PLAY IN THE RAIN

TECHNO CHUCKLES

WILBUR: Now that looks fun!

WILBUR AND TECHNO JOIN TOMMY IN THE RAIN

TECHNO: Come on,old man! Scared of getting a bit wet?

PHIL SMILES

PHIL: Oh, it is so on!

THE FAMILY PLAY IN THE RAIN. LAUGHTER IS HEARD.

END OF EPISODE
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Thomas packed up his stuff into his bag. He'd been influenced by Tommy Za to get one of those indie-side-bag things. Unfortunately, it had been worth it and was now his staple bag. He'd decorated the plain black bag with some small red badges, but when Toby and Ranboo had seen it, the decorations had gone from a few badges to three patches, thirteen pins and one very nicely tied ribbon.

Sometimes Thomas was glad season one of the show hadn't aired yet. While his casting was very much public, he was not well-known enough to get recognised. It was hard enough to get home on two buses and a train, Thomas didn't think he could do it if he got recognised as often as Philip did. Then again, if he got recognised as much as Philip did, he could probably afford not to take public transport.

When Thomas got home, he immediately collapsed onto his bed. Shroud looked disapprovingly at him from where she sat on his desk, but Henry was happy to join, miaowing all the while.

Thomas began to doze off, exhaustion taking over.

His hẽ̷̱̖͒̕a̴̡̫̘̘̼͍̳̣̭͒d̸͙̜͓̝̱̣̳̱͖̝̭̻̗̻̓́͗͗̐͠ͅ ̵̨͎̫̦͒̔̽̈́̔̈̐͗̍̈́̅̂h̴̢̦̫̙̟͉͖͖̪͕͍͈̋͛͆̔̈́̌̆̑u̵̮͔̖͉̭̦̯͈̜̣͍͘͜r̴̲̲͓̝̼̎̒̓̃̕͝ṭ̶̗͉̱̫͖̹̟̲̙͔̠̌̈́̉͋̅̐͑ why was h̵̨̧̤̲̤͎̪̮̘̰̺̙̐̿̾̽̓́̈́̐̌́̒̀̕ȩ̷̥̺̗̲̖̤͖̱̼̘͍̱͌͗͂̏̾̓͋̉̓̽̋̅ so tired

his brain felt w̶̛̭̒̑̀͑̆͠r̷̰͚̈́̽͐ó̴̡͙̥͚̙͙̩̥̚n̴̤̤͈̠̉͆́̃̔͘̕g̷̜̜̉͜ he felt so ali̸̧͍̟̹̼̞͖̪͉̩̞̯̯̾̓͑͐́v̷̧̛̳͚̭͇̗̳̠̬̗͙̈́̽̀̀́͌̊̾̅̀͗̚̕e̴̥̲̓͐̂͛̒͋̆̀̇̿

s̶̖͍̻͖͉̜͕̻̪̟̤̪̞͚̰̫̬̱͛̋̈́̍͊̾͂͋͆̓͌͑̅̈͘̕̚͝͝ơ̸͎̄̾̾̈̂͛͛̚͘͠m̶̨̨̧̨͉͉̰̱͇̗̬̙̳̫̮̏̀͋͗̂̉͑̓͐̄̄̓͋͋́̓̇̄̀̕ė̵̛̛͇̜̹̫̫͉̩̣̼̯̦̰̘͚̜̥̮̳͎͖̪͗̐̊̒̒̽͒͑̌̈̐͘̚͠͠͝t̶̨̢̢̢̡̤̻̱͚̬̮̳̥̠̝̬͐̓͂͘͜h̸̢̧̲̙̮̮̩̑͊͘i̶̭͔͉̳̟̞̺͎̻̺̦̺̪͐̀͒͛͆̽̎͜͜n̶̩͖͔̞̯͇͉̹͓̘̻͒̈́͋́̀̄̊̄͐̔͜ġ̸̞͔̠̫̻͚̫̝̬̗͈̭̳͎̔̀̓̓̀̅̏̇̈̓̀̂̈́̃̀̉͑̋̕͘͠ͅ clicked

Tommy opened his eyes.

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C̸̨̡̳͙̜͉̙̰̲͙̻̫̲̤̬̩̠̲̝̝̖̠̝͖̘̰̳̦͓͈̺̮̻͔̜̲̯̼͉̠̼̪̳̯̈́̃̄͒̊̽̈́͒̀̃̐́̉͂͜͝ͅ

Chapter Text

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Tommy opened his eyes.

His head hurt.

He rolled out of bed to an irritated miaow from Shroud who had been gracefully perched on the edge of his twin sized bed, and was now sprawled on the floor.

Muttering his apologies, Tommy got up and grabbed his phone. He stumbled into the kitchen, head still pounding, to grab some water. He opened his texts to see an unknown number.

✯ ✯ ✯
UNKNOWN NUMBER — THOMAS

UNKNOWN NUMBER: It's Oliver. Filming is cancelled today. Phil and Wilbur called out sick. Back tomorrow. Rest.

THOMAS CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘OLIVER GREY’
✯ ✯ ✯

Well, at least he didn't have to suffer through filming with this headache. Tommy flopped onto the sofa and reached for the TV remote.

It wasn't on the side table.

Tommy looked over and had to do a double-take.

The TV remote was floating. Not just ‘my eyes are unfocused from my headache and I'm seeing two remotes’ floating. The TV remote was hovering about a ruler's length from the table it was meant to rest on.

Tommy reached out his hand to grab the remote that was obviously not floating, he was probably just seeing things, when his hand connected with the plastic.

The TV remote was no longer floating, and was now in Tommy's hand.

Tommy's headache was now screaming at him and he was sure it was affecting his eyesight. After all, TV remotes didn't just float. Tommy was pretty sure some guy named Isaac had eaten an apple and proven gravity, or something.

Tommy got up to go back to bed and hopefully sleep off the headache when he tripped over an excited Henry.

He threw out his hand to catch him, and to his bewilderment, the coffee table met his hand.

Okay. Two objects floating. He was definitely hallucinating things.

Tommy observed the table. It looked pretty normal, apart from a subtle red sheen that surrounded the wood like a shadow when he squinted.

Tommy decided he was crazy. But the good thing about crazy is you aren't limited by normal rules.

He lifted his hand in curiosity, and a grin spread across his face when the table increased in height a few inches.

A few hours and many aching toes later, Tommy had pretty much determined that all he had to do was focus and move his hand in the general direction he wanted an object to go, and it would oblige. Which in Tommy's opinion was pretty fucking cool, but also impossible.

This was the type of thing that happened to characters in stories about heroes and magic and dragons. Not 19 year olds who lived paycheck-to-paycheck on a struggling actor's wages. Not young adults who barely remembered to brush his teeth. Not Tommy.

In Tommy's eyes, he had two options. Accept he was seeing things and ignore how fucking cool this power seemed to be, or…

Maybe he could use it. After all, Tommy Za had telekinesis, right? He could probably get away with saying it was a new special effect, or something. Not that anyone except Toby and Ranboo would care. He could probably lift the entire set with his shiny red magic and no one would even blink.

Tommy was distracted from his thoughts by the apparent lack of a throbbing pain in his head. There was a dull ache, but as he focused on bringing himself a bowl of cereal, even that seemed to pass. Weird.

“Ding!” His phone proclaimed, at too loud a volume to be acceptable.

Tommy grabbed it and unlocked his phone.

✯ ✯ ✯
OLIVER GREY — THOMAS

OLIVER GREY IS TYPING…

OLIVER GREY: William wants your number. Also are you dead or just one of those people who don't respond to texts

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: Sorry I got caught up in something. Feel free to give William my number but if he cyberbullies me I will report him to all of the authorities.

OLIVER GREY IS TYPING…

OLIVER GREY: All of them? Like even the coastguard? I'll pass on the message

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: all of them. even the mountain rescue service

OLIVER GREY IS TYPING…

OLIVER GREY: I hope he makes the right choice then

✯ ✯ ✯
UNKNOWN NUMBER — THOMAS

UNKNOWN NUMBER IS TYPING…

UNKNOWN NUMBER: if you report me to the authorities I will report you to philip reaper

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: go ahead bitch. i ain't scared of some middle aged dad

THOMAS: also fuck you you're supposed to apologise

THOMAS CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘BITCH’
✯ ✯ ✯

Tommy closed his phone after William refused to reply. It seemed the older man still didn't know manners, even over the phone.

Tommy smiled as he lifted his phone into his bedroom with a red shimmer.

At least William didn't have this.

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Ȧ̴̧̢̡̛͈͍͇̮̱̤̩͉̹̼̻̗̭̞͖̱̱̭̥̪͙̤͖̞͗̌̿͐̇͌͂̓̑̾̓̌͆̕͘͝͝

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT

PHIL IS IN THE KITCHEN MAKING PANCAKES.

PHIL: Tommy! Breakfast!

TECHNO: Dad, where's my granola?

PHIL: Top shelf. I had to hide it because Tommy tried to swap it with dog kibble.

TECHNO CHUCKLES

WILBUR: Dad, have you seen my yellow jumper?

PHIL: It's in your wardrobe, on the left hanger!

WILBUR: Found it!

PHIL: Tommy! Pancakes are getting cold!

TOMMY ENTERS. HE HAS MESSY HAIR AND OBVIOUS CONCEALER TO HIDE HIS RED NOSE.

TOMMY: Thanks Da-a-ACHOO!

TECHNO: Whose concealer did you steal?

TOMMY: Wilb- what's concealer? What are you talking about?

TOMMY CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY. HIS VOICE SOUNDS NASALLY. HE IS OBVIOUSLY SICK.

TECHNO: Dad.

PHIL: Tommy, why are you out of bed if you're sick? Go back to your room, I'll bring you pancakes.

TOMMY: Wh- I'm not sick! I'm just tired, that's it! It's fine, I'll just eat my breakfast and then I can train and then-

TOMMY STARTS COUGHING LOUDLY

TECHNO: Tommy. You have five seconds to go to your room before I lift you and throw you in that direction.

TOMMY TURNS AROUND AND GOES BACK TO HIS ROOM

PHIL: Normally I would tell you off for threatening your brother, but he would not have listened to you. Bring him his breakfast?

TECHNO: Got it.

WILBUR: WHO TOOK MY CONCEALER?

SCENE TWO- TALEZ-Z-Z-Z

TOMMY IS SAT CURLED UP IN BED COUGHING QUIETLY WHEN TECHNO ENTERS.

TECHNO: Brought you some pancakes.

TOMMY: Thanks.

TOMMY DOES NOT EAT THE PANCAKES, JUST LOOKS AT THEM.

TECHNO WIPES OFF THE CONCEALER ON TOMMY'S FACE. IT'S CLEAR HE'S VERY SICK.

TECHNO: You look tired.

TOMMY: Didn't get much sleep. Coughing and sneezing constantly does that to you.

TECHNO: Want me to read you a story?

TOMMY: I'm sixteen, Tech. I don't need to hear tales of dragons and happy endings.

TECHNO: You're thinking of Dad. I was going to read you the tale of Theseus. I thought you should know the story of your namesake.

TOMMY NODS AND TECHNO OPENS AN OLD, WELL-READ BOOK.

TECHNO: The king of Crete ordered that fourteen children from Athens, the kingdom he had just conquered, would be sent as a sacrifice to the Minotaur. Theseus knew this was wrong, and volunteered to be one of the children sent. He promised his father, the King of Athens, that he would return with a white sail if he was successful. He killed the Minotaur with the help of a young woman named Ariadne, and set sail to return to his father.

TOMMY FALLS ASLEEP

TECHNO: But on the way home, he abandoned Ariadne and she eventually married Dionysus. When he arrived home, he forgot to change the sail from black to white, and his father killed himself in grief.

TECHNO NOTICES TOMMY IS ASLEEP

TECHNO: I hope your story never becomes that much of a tragedy.

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Tommy sat on a chair on the edge of the set, ignoring the faint pull of his power calling for use, and instead scrolled through social media mindlessly. He was just inspecting a piece of lovely art to be absolutely sure it wasn't AI, as the caption was pretty suspicious, when his train of thought was interrupted by the stage manager shouting for someone called Clementine.

He looked up, and accidentally caught the eye of Oliver Grey, who walked over to him, wig and all. Tommy never understood how he was able to not only act, but do stunts and fighting in the wig that reached down to his ankles.

“Hello Thomas. The new special effects suit you.” Oliver spoke in his quiet monotone.

Tommy's brain went into panic mode until he remembered- he'd played off using his power as a new special effect, a way to keep his power in use without sounding like a maniac.

“Yeah, it's pretty cool. I definitely prefer this red colour to the over-the-top sparkles.”

Oliver shocked Tommy then- he laughed. The one and only Oliver Grey, known for being emotionless and apathetic, laughed at Tommy. And Tommy hadn't even said anything funny, just made a statement?

“You're right about that. I'm just glad Technoblade’s power is strength, so I don't have to be hooked up to projectors, or whatever you have to suffer through for that red glow thing.”

Tommy laughed nervously, begging his brain to do something, anything, to interact with Oliver and make the actor think Tommy wasn't a total loser. What could he say? Talk about the episode, the story, the weather? Wait no, not the weather, that's lame. Don't talk about the weather! Talk about anything but-

“So, wig?”

Great. Ten out of ten on social interaction, Tommy's brain.

Surprisingly, Oliver didn't leave or shout or laugh at Tommy for being stupid. A smile spread across his face, and Tommy marveled at his luck that this conversation had lasted so long. It seemed his absolute social ineptitude either didn't work on Oliver or passed as humour.

“Yeah, it's pretty cool. I got to pick the colour, but they said I couldn't have red because it was most of my colour scheme, so I picked pink. Which was fair, the only coloured item of clothing I wear in my superhero costume is the red cape. But Techno Za just wears grey, black and white so it probably wouldn't have clashed that badly. It takes a solid hour to get it on, though, and that's not including the makeup for the scar.”

Tommy blinked. His entire world seemed to be imploding because not only was Oliver actually speaking to him, but it felt right. It reminded Tommy of a warm fireplace on a cold night, or a paycheck after a long day of work. Something in his mind was smiling and reminding Tommy that this was where he needed to be.

“Five minute call! Actors on set!” The stage manager called out. Tommy blinked- where had the time gone? He had pretty much just sat down for his twenty minute break. The joys of social media scrolling.

“Well, bye, Thomas. See you around. I'll have to come and talk to you more often, you're interesting.”

Tommy gaped.

✯ ✯ ✯
OLIVER GREY — THOMAS

OLIVER GREY: good luck with your scenes. sometimes I'm glad not to be the main character of this show
✯ ✯ ✯

SCENE THREE- SOUP IS GREAT

TOMMY BLINKS AND YAWNS

TOMMY: [GROGGILY] How long was I asleep…?

WILBUR IS SAT ON THE END OF TOMMY'S BED.

WILBUR: About an hour. I've only been here for a few minutes though. Soup?

TOMMY NODS AND TAKES THE SOUP.

WILBUR: Careful. It's hot.

TOMMY IS NOT CAREFUL. HE EATS THE SOUP AND IMMEDIATELY STARTS COUGHING.

TOMMY: Hot!

WILBUR GIGGLES QUIETLY

WILBUR: I told you it was hot! Don't blame me for your own negligence.

TOMMY STICKS HIS TONGUE OUT TO COOL HIS MOUTH

TOMMY: Thut up Wilby! Thop wive your big worbs!

WILBUR: Wilby? Aw, Toms!

TOMMY DRINKS WATER

TOMMY: No, wait, that was just-

WILBUR: [OVERLY AFFECTIONATE] Tommy! You gave me a nickname!

TOMMY: I hate you.

WILBUR: Eat your soup.

TOMMY: I don't want your soup. It's yucky.

WILBUR: Techno made that soup.

TOMMY IMMEDIATELY BEGINS EATING THE SOUP QUICKLY.

WILBUR: Works every time.

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SCENE FOUR- CARE AND AFFECTION, AWW

PHIL: Hey Tommy, how are you feel-

WILBUR SHUSHES PHIL. TOMMY IS ASLEEP.

PHIL: [QUIETLY] He's been so tired lately, poor thing. He's so young compared to us, and he tries to surpass us, nevermind keep up with us. Sometimes I worry that he will push himself too far and he won't be able to bounce back from it.

WILBUR: He's here now. He's okay now. We've got him. As long as we're here, we can save him from overworking himself.

TECHNO: We won't let anyone hurt him. We'll protect him. We're his brothers, it's our job.

PHIL: Yeah. We will.

END OF EPISODE

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✯ ✯ ✯
The Fellows- Group Chat

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: why is my character always suffering #justicefortommy. i need a tommy-centric episode where he wins a fight or something I can't take this much longer :(

PURPLE VALLEY IS TYPING…

PURPLE VALLEY: haha yeah.

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: toby? you there?

SUNFLOWER IS TYPING…

SUNFLOWER: im here.

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: oh. okay then.

✯ ✯ ✯

Ǹ̸̨̢̢̡̛̳̖͇̣͕̙̩̼̯̮̙͓̗̺̫̪̗̱̲̱̠̝͖̠͈̬̙̼̲͖͇̆͂̂̇̎͋͆̀̿̀͊̋̃̊͂̀͂̓͑̏̕͜͜͝

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- RITE OF INITIATION

PHIL STANDS IN FRONT OF A LARGE DOOR. TECHNO, WILBUR AND TOMMY STAND IN FRONT OF HIM.

PHIL: So boys, it's finally time. A rite of passage. One of the most important parts of being a hero. An experience I've saved until you all were old enough. A-

WILBUR: Dad, get to the point!

TECHNO AND TOMMY CHUCKLE. PHIL LOOKS DISAPPOINTEDLY AT WILBUR.

PHIL: Every hero has their iconic weapon. A way to not only distinguish them from the rest of the heroes, but to cement them as their own person. I chose my sword when I was your age.

PHIL SHOWS THE BROTHERS HIS SWORD. IT IS AN AVERAGE SIZED SWORD, WITH A BRASS HILT THAT IS ENCRUSTED WITH EMERALDS. THERE IS A SMALL PURPLE THREAD TIED AROUND THE POMMEL.

PHIL: Even today, I still have this sword. I can't imagine my life without it. It's helped me through so many fights and today… you three shall choose your own weapons to stay by your sides.

TOMMY: I get a sword?

WILBUR: Dad, I don't think Tommy should be trusted with a sword!

PHIL: He's sixteen, not six, mate.

PHIL: Now, are you ready?

PHIL OPENS THE DOOR. THE ROOM INSIDE IS FULL OF BRIGHT LIGHT.

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Tommy was wandering around. He was scheduled to be fitted for a new costume for later in the season, but the room on the schedule was empty and he really couldn't be bothered to search for what he knew would be a few hours of pointless measuring and standing awkwardly while people around him muttered and compared identical colours.

So, he went to look for Oliver. They had settled into a vague routine where if either of them was free, they would chat and exchange meaningless chatter.

Tommy had discovered Oliver Grey was not the nonchalant, careless individual his branding made him out to be. By contrast, he was actually a deadpan guy who was as socially awkward as Tommy. Their interactions ranged from talking about the weather to discussing the most useful type of rock (Tommy was convinced it was flint but Oliver argued it was some pretentious rock Tommy had never heard of.)

However, Oliver was nowhere to be found. So Tommy was wandering.

He had twenty minutes until he was required back on set, and thirty until he actually had to be back, so his plan was to walk around and see what other people were doing. Maybe there would be someone he could annoy.

He turned the corner.

Nope. Turn around now.

Tommy turned backwards quickly, but it was too late. William fucking Tone had seen him, and was running towards him.

Awesome.

“Thomas!” William called after Tommy as he walked away. Tommy decided to pretend that he hadn't heard- he could be wearing headphones, or in deep thought, or just not heard, or-

William grabbed Tommy’s shoulder.

Well, there was no way for Tommy to avoid him now.

“Thomas! How are you? I tried to catch you yesterday but you got out so fast!” William laughed nervously, and Tommy recalled how he'd run off set to avoid William.

“Yeah, I had to go. Like now, I have to go now. Goodbye William.”

Tommy tried to pull away, but William's hand still rested firmly on his shoulder. Didn't this guy get the hint?

William seemed to be going through an emotional crisis, which Tommy was very happy to leave him alone to experience, but William was very insistent that Tommy stay. Or at least, his grip on Tommy's shoulder said so.

“I'm sorry Thomas.”

Excuse him?

Tommy blinked. William was… apologising?

“What?” Tommy exclaimed, drawing a few weird looks from people around them. “You're apologising to me? After two weeks of ignoring me after Toby dragged you, you're apologising?”

Those words seemed to hit, as William grimaced like he'd just been stabbed. Which was the correct response, and what he would be experiencing if he didn't leave Tommy alone.

“I’m sorry, Thomas!” William exclaimed, starling Tommy. “ I'm sorry for teasing you, I'm sorry for being so awful to you and I'm sorry for not apologising sooner. I just thought you were this uptight kid and I thought that being mean would make you react and maybe you'd show your true colours, but then Toby screamed at me and I realised that maybe you might have just been shy or scared. I know it's not fair and it's definitely not an excuse but… I'm sorry. I don't want to hate you.”

Tommy was very confused.

William let go of Tommy's shoulder. He gave a small smile, and then walked away.

…what?

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SCENE TWO- CHOICES

THE DOOR OPENS. INSIDE ARE COUNTLESS WEAPONS OF EVERY SHAPE, SIZE AND COLOUR. TOMMY IS STARSTRUCK. WILBUR AND TECHNO TRY TO HIDE THEIR ASTONISHMENT, BUT ONLY TECHNO ACCOMPLISHES IT.

PHIL: Welcome to the Weapons Gallery. Here is every weapon you could ever think of. Think carefully, because today you make a choice that will define you forever.

PHIL SMILES

PHIL: Go crazy!

MONTAGE. TOMMY LOOKS AT GIANT SWORDS AND ATTEMPTS TO LIFT THE LARGEST ONES. HE FAILS.

WILBUR PICKS UP AS MANY WEAPONS AS HE CAN AND RUNS OFF TO A CORNER TO INSPECT THEM, DROPPING MANY ON THE WAY.

TECHNO GOES FOR THE GOLDEN SECTION OF THE WEAPONS, INSPECTING THEIR SHEEN.

AT THE END OF THE MONTAGE, WILBUR HOLDS A SET OF SILVER THROWING KNIVES, TECHNO HOLDS A LARGE GOLDEN CLAYMORE WITH A RED POMMEL AND TOMMY HOLDS A LARGE ROSE GOLD CLAYMORE THAT IS ABOUT HIS HEIGHT.

PHIL: Beautiful selections! Now, before we announce these as your official weapons, I think we should test them, don't you?

PHIL GRINS

SCENE THREE- FORM OVER FUNCTION

PHIL: So, these dummies should suffice. Just fight normally, a good weapon should feel like an extension of yourself.

TECHNO FIGHTS FIRST. HE FIGHTS FLAWLESSLY, CLAYMORE SLICING THE DUMMIES APART WITH EASE.

TECHNO: [smirking] Dad, I may never forgive you for not letting me use this earlier.

WILBUR FIGHTS NEXT, MISSING THE TARGETS AT THE BEGINNING. HE QUICKLY PICKS UP THE TECHNIQUE THOUGH, AND EVENTUALLY IS ABLE TO HIT THE BULLSEYE ON EACH DUMMY.

WILBUR: [dreamily] I think I'm in love.

TOMMY GETS UP TO FIGHT. HOWEVER, HE IS BARELY ABLE TO LIFT THE CLAYMORE AND DROPS IT WHEN HE ATTEMPTS TO HIT THE DUMMY. HE TRIES A FEW MORE TIMES, BEFORE GIVING UP AND SITTING DOWN.

TOMMY: … I'm tired. I'm going to bed.

TOMMY RUNS OUT OF THE ROOM

SCENE FOUR- THE REAL CHOICES

TOMMY IS SAT ON THE FLOOR OF THE WEAPONS GALLERY. HE IS SURROUNDED BY SWORDS.

TECHNO ENTERS AND SPOTS TOMMY.

TECHNO: So, not a claymore user then?

TOMMY LOOKS UP IN CONFUSION

TECHNO: Did I ever tell you about when I tried to use daggers to fight?

TOMMY SHAKES HIS HEAD CONFUSINGLY

TECHNO: It was terrible. I had these beautiful ruby-encrusted daggers and I tried so hard to fight with them. I would spend hours reading up on technique and practicing on the targets. But it never worked. And one day, I had to fight and I tried to use my dagger to pin a criminal to the wall to save Wilbur. And I missed, and the criminal pushed him off a building.

TOMMY GASPS

TECHNO: Phil came to me that night, and just asked to see my daggers. He explained that sometimes the weapon just isn't for you, but it's better to use a weapon that works for you than one that doesn't.
So, Theseus, what weapon works for you?

TOMMY SMILES A SMALL SMILE AND JUMPS UP. HE GRABS A BRONZE SWORD FROM THE CLOSEST SHELF AND RUNS INTO THE TRAINING ROOM.

PHIL: Tommy? Did you find a better-

PHIL IS CUT OFF BY TOMMY SKEWERING A DUMMY. HE FIGHTS WELL WITH THE SWORD, AND TECHNO SMILES IN THE CORNER.

PHIL: Looks like you found your weapon, eh Tommy?

TOMMY: Yeah. I reckon I have.

END OF EPISODE

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Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- NO MORE LIVER

TOMMY ENTERS TECHNO’S ROOM

TOMMY: Hey Techno! I was bored and talking to Dad but he's busy doing hero things that I wasn't allowed to do because I'm too young, which personally I think is stupid because I'm sixteen and definitely old enough to read paper… what was I saying? Oh yeah! Then I went to go talk to Wilbur but he was playing his guitar and we all know not to talk to him when he's playing his guitar if you want to have a free afternoon, so I thought I'd come talk to you and see what you're doing!

TOMMY FINALLY NOTICES TECHNO

TOMMY: …what are you doing, exactly?

TECHNO IS SAT ON THE FLOOR WITH PAPER SCATTERED AROUND HIM.

TECHNO: Analysis.

TOMMY: oooooookayyyyyyy. Analysis of what?

TECHNO SMILES

TECHNO: Currently I'm doing the myth of Prometheus, but I've done Icarus, Sisyphus and Orpheus already. Prometheus is the most interesting one so far though, he stole fire and got condemned to being chained to a rock and having a bird pick out his liver every day!

TOMMY: [whispered] We need to get you out the house.

TOMMY: Okay! Well, why don't you come hang out with me. I'm bored, Techno! I want to do something interesting!

TECHNO: You are lonely. I, Techno, shall save you. Come, gremlin child, and I shall give you company.

TOMMY: [whispered] That's what he thinks.

SCENE TWO- NO TECHNO, MURDER ISN'T CODED IN THIS GAME

TECHNO AND TOMMY ARE PLAYING THE SIMS.

TECHNO: There! A victim!

TOMMY: …that's a child, Techno.

TECHNO: The child of the richest family here! If we kill him, we destroy capitalism! Anarchy wins!

TECHNO CLICKS ON THE SIM

TECHNO: Why are my only options Friendly Introduction, Funny Introduction and Rude Introduction? How do I kill?

TOMMY: You can't kill people in this game, Techno.

TECHNO: Then what's the point in playing?

TECHNO TURNS TO LEAVE, BUT SEES THE SCREEN MOVE

TECHNO: Did that child just laugh at me?

TOMMY: I think he has the Erratic trait, so he-

TECHNO: I must destroy him.

TECHNO RUNS TOWARDS THE COMPUTER WITH HIS SWORD READY. TOMMY STEPS IN JUST IN TIME.

TOMMY: Okay! How about a different game?

TOMMY SCRAMBLES THROUGH VIDEO GAMES

TOMMY: Just Dance?

TOMMY LOOKS AT TECHNO, WHO LOOKS LIKE HE IS ABOUT TO KILL SOMEONE

TOMMY: For the sake of the TV, let's not. Undertale, maybe?

TOMMY WATCHES TECHNO GENTLY HIT A LAMP AND APOLOGISE TO IT.

TOMMY: Yeah, no.

TOMMY RUNS OUT OF VIDEO GAMES.

TOMMY: Why don't we…

TOMMY PANICS

TOMMY: Do fighting training!

TECHNO TURNS TOWARDS TOMMY SLOWLY. TOMMY COWERS.

TECHNO: You dare challenge me?

TOMMY: [whispered] Oh no.

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Tommy was very confused.

He'd spent three days analysing William's message and how best to reply. A perk and a drawback, text messaging.

He could forgive William for being a prick to him, and accept his badly worded apology. Maybe they could even be friends?

But what if the apology was a joke? William could just be waiting for Tommy to let his guard down and then…

What would William do? Tommy being his friend wasn't that much of a flex. Plus, William was an almost-millionaire who was renowned for most of his acting jobs. Tommy was a barely-adult who just managed to be lucky enough to get this job. Most people on Twitter had pretty much forgotten that Tommy had been cast- not a week went by that Tommy didn't see a Tweet about who would play ‘Tommy Za’.

So, if common sense could be trusted, William was being trustworthy. Which meant William actually wanted to be friends.

Did Tommy want to be friends?

William was…

Tommy stopped. Who was William?

Thinking back, had Tommy and William ever had a civil conversation? Did Tommy know anything about William? Why hadn't they become friends?

Tommy sighed.

He typed out a text, hoping he wouldn't regret sending it.

✯ ✯ ✯
BITCH — THOMAS

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: fine we can be friends or whatever. don't be a dickhead

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: hello Thomas. I'm William, pleasure to meet you

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: (this is us starting over so you can just forget how much of a dick I was to you :D )

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: hello william. im thomas. do you like the centre of the lettuce or the leaves on the edge better?

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: what type of question is that????
✯ ✯ ✯

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SCENE THREE- PREPARE TO GET AS INJURED AS YOU CAN BE IN A KIDS SHOW

TECHNO: Stand ready.

TECHNO: Prepare…

TECHNO: Begin!

TOMMY HOLDS HIS SWORD AS TECHNO TOWERS OVER HIM. THEY FIGHT, TECHNO ATTACKING AND TOMMY BARELY DEFENDING. TOMMY STRUGGLES, AND ENDS UP BACKED INTO A CORNER

TECHNO: Do you yield?

TOMMY: No!

TOMMY RUNS BEHIND TECHNO AND SWINGS HIS SWORD UPWARDS AS HARD AS HE CAN. HE HITS THE HILT OF TECHNO'S SWORD, AND THE SWORD GOES FLYING.

TOMMY: I win!

TECHNO: [muffled] Tommy, are you okay?

TOMMY: I win… right Techno?

TOMMY LOOKS DOWN. HE IS OUTSIDE THE CIRCLE. HE IS DISQUALIFIED.

TOMMY: Oh.

TECHNO MUTTERS SOMETHING WORDLESSLY.

TOMMY LOOKS DOWN AND SEES A LARGE GASH IN HIS ARM FROM WHERE TECHNO'S SWORD FELL.

TOMMY: Oh…

BLACKOUT

SCENE FOUR- FREEDOM?

FADE IN

TOMMY BLINKS

TOMMY: I need to stop passing out.

TECHNO CHUCKLES.

TECHNO: Yeah kid, you do. You scared me then.

TOMMY: I lost. I thought I'd finally beaten you.

TECHNO: Listen Tommy, are you okay? I love fighting, but one of my most important rules is to make sure my opponent is enjoying the fight as much as I am. You didn't even smile until you'd thought you'd won.

TOMMY MUTTERS SOMETHING

TECHNO: Speak up kid. I can't help if I can't hear.

TOMMY: I just wanted you not to be lonely.

TECHNO LAUGHS

TOMMY: Why are you laughing? I was being an incredible brother!

TECHNO: Tommy, I could never be lonely. Not because of you and Wilbur at least, you two keep me busier than I ever thought I'd be able to cope with. I thrive being alone, you don't need to worry.

TOMMY IS QUIET

TECHNO: Did I finish my story? I don't think I did.

TECHNO : Yes, Prometheus went through excruciating pain and suffered, but he got out. He was freed. He got his hope back.

TOMMY: You nerd. Of course you know that.

TECHNO: Thank you for keeping me company today Tommy.

TOMMY SMILES

END OF EPISODE

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O̴̢̨͖̖̼̳͇̺̲͓͓͓̭̱̯̹̜̣̤̫͂̈́͋̍̈́̀

Chapter Text

✯ ✯ ✯
BITCH —- THOMAS

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: just got the script for the new ep. who are these guys

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: yeah it's the channel-mandated collab. basically we have to have some characters from another show on the channel for legal reasons. they're from the ‘Life’ series if you want to do research

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: law is stupid and we should just get rid of it

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: sureeee Thomas. why don't you go back to learning your lines?

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: ok

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: WAIT IM SO STUPID THIS EPISODE NO PLEASE

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: HAHAHAHAHAHAH

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SCENE ONE- NEW NEIGHBOURS VS ONE KID WHO LIKES THEIR STYLE

TOMMY: Daddddd have you seen my-

TOMMY STOPS AND STARES AT PHIL, WHO IS HOLDING A CASSEROLE

TOMMY: What is that and who is it for, because it better not be me.

PHIL LAUGHS

PHIL: Tommy, this is a casserole. It's a dish traditionally given to new neighbours.

TOMMY GRINS

TOMMY: We have new neighbours?

PHIL: Yep, they're moving in down the road. I think they arrived a few days ago, I was about to go and greet them. Would you like to come with me?

TOMMY: Yes!

SCENE CUTS TO THE FRONT DOOR OF THE NEW NEIGHBOURS’S HOUSE. PHIL KNOCKS

JOEL: Hello? Can we help you?

TOMMY: Hello! I'm Tommy!

GRIAN: [FROM INSIDE] Who is it Joel?

JOEL: Some kid called Tommy and his dad, I think!

GRIAN COMES TO THE DOOR

TOMMY: Woah, you have matching jackets!

GRIAN SMILES

GRIAN: Hello Tommy. I'm Grian, and this is Joel. Do you like our jackets?

TOMMY: Yeah! They're awesome! Are they leather?

GRIAN: Joel, can you call Tim?

JIMMY ARRIVES AT THE DOOR

JIMMY: Call me for what?

TOMMY: You all have matching jackets?

GRIAN: For that.

JIMMY: Hey kid! Do you two want to come in?

PHIL: If you're alright with it mate. I've brought you three casserole.

JOEL: Awesome, thanks. Jimmy, take the kid and his dad into the living room. Grian…

GRIAN: [HUSHED] I'll hide them.

JOEL: [HUSHED] Good.

SCENE TWO- WAIT A MINUTE…

PHIL: Call me Phil, mate. And yeah, we've lived here for a while. Almost Techno and Wil's entire lives.

GRIAN: Are they your sons as well?

TOMMY: Yep, they're really cool! Techno is super strong and Wil can-

PHIL: Make music! Yep, Wilbur likes to make music. And Techno isn't super strong, just slightly above average. He just trains. A lot. We're a perfectly normal family.

JIMMY ENTERS

JIMMY: Hey guys, sorry to do this but we actually have somewhere to be so you're going to have to leave.

PHIL: That's alright mate, it was nice to meet you.

PHIL WALKS OUT OF THE DOOR. TOMMY IS BEHIND HIM, BUT TURNS WHEN HE HEARS THE BAD BOYS TALKING.

JOEL:[HUSHED] We can scope it out now, and tonight we can grab them.

GRIAN:[HUSHED] Does she know?

JOEL:[HUSHED] Not a clue.

JIMMY:[HUSHED] Good. Bad boys, let's go!

TOMMY GASPS

TOMMY: I have to stop them!

SCENE THREE- THESEUS THE HERO

IT IS NIGHT. THE BAD BOYS ARE CLIMBING THROUGH A BUILDING. THESEUS IS HIDING IN A BUSH NEAR THEM.

JOEL: Grian, can you see them?

GRIAN: Joel, stop pushing!

JIMMY: Shut up! I see them, they're on that shelf!

THE BAD BOYS GET INSIDE.

THESEUS: I have to stop them! Whatever they're doing, it's not right!

THESEUS USES HIS TELEKENISIS TO LEVITATE INTO THE BUILDING

THE BAD BOYS ARE CREEPING OUT OF THE ROOM WHEN THESEUS ENTERS

THESEUS: Stop, thieves!

GRIAN: Bad boys, run!

THE BAD BOYS RUN. THESEUS PURSUES THEM, BUT EVENTUALLY LOSES THEM.

THESEUS GIVES UP. HE REMOVES HIS COSTUME AND STARTS TO WALK BACK HOME WHEN HE SEES THE BAD BOYS

JIMMY: Joel, move!

JOEL: Jimmy, shut up!

GRIAN: Both of you stop! We’ll get caught by Theseus!

TOMMY: Um… what are you three doing?

THE BAD BOYS TURN TO TOMMY

JOEL: Tommy! We were… um…

THE BAD BOYS RUN

TOMMY: I have to tell Dad. He'll know what to do.

SCENE FOUR- OVERDRAMATIC MUCH?

PHIL KNOCKS ON THE BAD BOYS’S DOOR

GRIAN OPENS THE DOOR

GRIAN: Phil! And Tommy… hi?

PHIL: Explain. Now.

GRIAN GESTURES THEM INSIDE. JIMMY AND JOEL ARE SAT ON THE SOFA INSIDE.

PHIL: Tell me why I shouldn't call the police. My son saw you three break into a building and run away.

JOEL: Woah, when you say it like that it sounds bad!

TOMMY: You stole! That is bad!

JIMMY: It's not stealing! It's… borrowing without her knowing!

PHIL: Explain.

GRIAN: Fine. Joel.

JOEL: Well… first of all it really wasn't stealing. The woman whose house we broke into… is my wife Lizzie.

PHIL: You broke into your wife's house? Why not go through the door?

JIMMY: Because of what we took. Lizzie confiscated our sunglasses because we kept making Bad Boy puns.

GRIAN: So we stole them back! But we didn't expect Tommy to be there… or Theseus…

PHIL: You got caught by Theseus? You're lucky you didn't get sold out instantly.

JIMMY: So it's all a big misunderstanding! Please don't call the police…

PHIL: Well, I guess since no one got hurt it was fine. But next time, just talk to Lizzie!

JOEL: Oh. Yeah. Right.

END OF EPISODE

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✯ ✯ ✯

OLIVER GREY — THOMAS

OLIVER GREY IS TYPING…

OLIVER GREY: are you friends with William now?

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: i wouldn't say we're friends. we're more like coworkers who exchange the occasional 3am meme and talk about milk

OLIVER GREY IS TYPING…

OLIVER GREY: I don't even want to know.

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: Well, milk is an interesting conversation topic!
✯ ✯ ✯

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Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- YAY, RESPONSIBILITY!

THE FAMILY ARE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES IN THE LIVING ROOM WHEN THE ALERT SOUND PLAYS

PHIL: It's a minor level alert. Tommy, would you like-

TOMMY: Yes! Yes! Yes! Finally! My first solo mission! Don't worry Dad, these criminals won't know what hit them! Thank you, thank you!

TOMMY RUNS OUT OF THE ROOM EXCITEDLY

WILBUR: You're trusting Tommy with a solo mission? He's only sixteen.

PHIL: Your first solo mission was when you were fourteen. Techno was twelve.

WILBUR: Yeah, and I accidentally put the mayor to sleep. And we don't talk about Techno's first mission.

THE FAMILY SHUDDER

PHIL: Well, Tommy has two more years of experience. So hopefully he'll do better than you two did. It's only a minor mission anyway- reported as two villains hanging out on a rooftop. No weapons, no identifiers. Probably just some kids who look a bit suspicious.

SCENE TWO- THEY WERE NOT JUST TWO KIDS

THESEUS LANDS ON A ROOFTOP. TWO KIDS ARE SAT THERE WITH THEIR BACKS TO HIM.

THESEUS: Stop! For I, Theseus, will stop you two criminals doing crime!

THE KIDS TURN AROUND

THESEUS: …what? But this was supposed to be a low level mission…

HEPHAESTUS: Hello Theseus.

HEPHAESTUS AND CHARON FIGHT THESEUS

HEPHAESTUS AND CHARON ESCAPE

THESEUS: I can't let them leave! I have to follow them!

SCENE THREE- VERY SUBTLE

THESEUS ENTERS A LARGE ROOM FILLED WITH TECHNOLOGY AND TRASH. HE HIDES BEHIND A LARGE BIN.

HEPHAESTUS: That was close.

CHARON: Did we lose him?

HEPHAESTUS: I think so. That kid really gets on my nerves sometimes, he doesn't know when to stop.

THESEUS OPENS HIS MOUTH IN PROTEST, BUT SLAMS HIS HAND OVER HIS MOUTH. IN DOING THIS, HE HITS THE BIN AND IT FALLS. HEPHAESTUS AND CHARON TURN AND SEE HIM.

HEPHAESTUS: Well, well, well. Look who we have here! Theseus followed us!

THESEUS: Hephaestus and Charon, I'm taking you in. Do not resist. Anything you say can and will-

HEPHAESTUS USES HIS ABILITIES TO PIN THESEUS TO THE WALL WITH METAL

HEPHAESTUS: That's no fun. How about… we make a deal?

THESEUS: I don't make deals with villains.

HEPHAESTUS: Need I remind you who is in control here?

THE METAL PUSHES HARDER ONTO THESEUS. HE LETS OUT A PAINED GASP

HEPHAESTUS: Now, I think a competition is in order. Charon and I against you. If you win, you can take us both back to your family and we'll surrender. If we win, we keep you as hostage. Sound good?

THE METAL PUSHES ONTO THESEUS EVEN MORE AND HIS REPLY IS HALF-SCREAMED

THESEUS: Okay! Okay, fine I'll do it just please stop!

THE METAL FALLS TO THE FLOOR, AS DOES THESEUS.

HEPHAESTUS: Wonderful. Charon, go set up the Ace Race arena. Make sure no civilians are watching.

SCENE FOUR- ACE RACE

BEEP. THE THREE BEGIN RUNNING ACROSS AN OBSTACLE COURSE.

CHARON PHASES THROUGH ALL THE OBSTACLES, BUT ALSO PHASES THROUGH THE FLOOR AND FALLS THROUGH, RESTARTING AT THE START LINE.

THESEUS IS IN THE LEAD, GETTING THROUGH OBSTACLES QUICKLY USING HIS TELEKENISIS. HOWEVER, HEPHAESTUS IS CLOSE BEHIND.

AS THEY ENTER THE FINAL STRETCH, THESEUS IS IN FIRST. JUST AS HE IS ABOUT TO WIN, HEPHAESTUS USES METAL TO PULL THESEUS BACK, AND THESEUS LOSES.

THESEUS: That's not fair! You cheated!

HEPHAESTUS: All's fair in love and Ace Race. Now according to our agreement, we get to keep you hostage. Sounds fun, doesn't it?

THESEUS TRIES TO PROTEST, BUT CHARON KNOCKS HIM OUT AND EVERYTHING GOES BLACK.

SCENE FIVE- FAMILY FOREVER

WHEN THESEUS BLINKS, THERE IS WIND IN HIS FACE. HE LOOKS AROUND DROWSILY AND SEES HYPNOS IS CARRYING HIM.

HYPNOS: Shh, go back to sleep.

FADE TO BLACK

FADE IN

TOMMY IS SAT IN BED. HIS FAMILY ARE SAT AROUND HIM.

TOMMY: What happened? I don't remember…

TECHNO: Charon knocked you out. When you were doing Ace Race, one of the obstacles caught your panic button. When we saw you were in the Arena, we knew something was wrong. We got there just in time to see Hephaestus cheat.

WILBUR: As soon as you were knocked out, Dad and Techno fought Charon and Hephaestus while I took you home. I think you woke up at some point, so I put you back to sleep. We managed to get out without many injuries, but Charon and Hephaestus are out of action for a while.

PHIL: Why didn't you call us? Your first mission was supposed to be low level, but you fought Charon and Hephaestus twice! We could've helped you.

TOMMY: I just wanted to prove that I didn't need help. That I'm a real superhero.

WILBUR: Of course you are, Tommy. But you're also our brother.

FAMILY HUG

END OF EPISODE

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The Fellows- Group Chat

RED HYACINTH IS TYPING…

RED HYACINTH: guys? hello?
✯ ✯ ✯

S̷̘̝͖̭̗̻̮̟̦͎͖̯̯̍́̀̈̀͐̉͛͆̀̑̔͌̋̈̑̓̉̈̈͛̓̈́̄́̓͋́͂̏̋͒̇͑͐̀̚͘͘͝͝͠͝ͅ

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- A FAMILIAL FIND

THE FAMILY ARE SORTING THROUGH DUSTY CARDBOARD BOXES.

WILBUR PULLS OUT A BROKEN PIECE OF WOOD

WILBUR: Hey, my old guitar!

TOMMY: There's no way that was a guitar.

WILBUR: It was! Until Techno thought I was breaking into the house and decided to use it to defend himself…

TECHNO: I have no regrets.

TOMMY PULLS OUT A BOOK

TOMMY: Hey Dad, what's this?

PHIL GASPS WITH JOY

PHIL: It's the Za family scrapbook. There's been a page for every family member since the family started!

TOMMY: It's so… old!

PHIL SMILES SARCASTICALLY AT TOMMY, BUT IT MORPHS INTO A GRIN OF JOY

PHIL: This shows our lineage all the way back to the first Za…

TECHNO: Come on then. Let's take a break and look at this, huh?

TOMMY: Yess! This was soooo boring!

THE FAMILY CHUCKLE

SCENE TWO- INESCAPABLE HISTORY LESSON

The family sit around Phil on the sofa. Phil holds the scrapbook on his lap.

PHIL: This is the first Za. Sophia. She was a wonderful woman, so I've heard. She was known as the ‘Angel of Death’, which gave her an aura of fear. However, she was actually most known for rescuing people from death. She saved so many people that the public began to theorise that she either had a deal with Death, or was Death.

TECHNO: She sounds incredible.

TOMMY: What's that feather there?

TOMMY POINTS TO A WHITE FEATHER STAINED WITH RED

PHIL: The Za family has been traditionally avians since the beginning. Of course, as generations have evolved the avian gene has started to die out. But when it was guaranteed that every Za would be an avian, it was tradition to take one of their feathers for the scrapbook. And once they died, the feather was stained with red ink to symbolise their passing.

PHIL TURNS A FEW PAGES

PHIL: This is Jayden Za. A few generations down from Sophia. The first Za not to have white wings.

WILBUR: Is there a reason for the colour of your wings?

PHIL: Not really. It's mostly linked to your power. Most avians have smaller secondary powers. It was rumoured that Sophia had the power to see when someone would die, which was why she had white wings. I have black wings because I don't have any secondary powers. I'm the first Za to have black wings, because we're such a magically blessed family.

PHIL: Jayden had blue wings. They were especially good with water, and they were unable to drown.

PHIL: After Jayden, the stories began to change a bit. I was told the tales of the original Za’s like bedtime stories, but when the Za’s began to have children, it was too hard to keep track of the complete lives of every family member. So this book only documents their name, birth and death dates, wing colour and secondary powers.

PHIL FLIPS THROUGH A LOT MORE PAGES OF SMALL WRITING THAT BEGAN TO GRADUALLY GET LESS DETAILED, UNTIL HE REACHES HIS OWN PAGE.

PHIL: This is my page.

TOMMY: Whoa Dad, you're old!

PHIL: [SARCASTIC] Thanks Tommy.

The family laugh.

PHIL: This book depicts everyone in the family. Having your name on these pages shows you are truly a part of the Za lineage.

PHIL TURNS THE PAGE

PHIL: Techno… Wilbur…

PHIL STOPS

PHIL: Tommy's page is torn out.

PHIL LOOKS ANGRY, BUT TRIES NOT TO SHOW IT

PHIL: We have to find Tommy's page. This book is imbued with magic, it's incredibly important that every family member is written in here.

THE BOYS GO TO LOOK FOR THE PAGE

PHIL: [QUIETLY] Or he might not be a Za much longer.

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✯ ✯ ✯
BITCH — THOMAS

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: this is a kids show why do we have so much lore and world building???

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: no idea. lore-heavy episodes never get shown anyway, networks tend to play episodes that don't relate to the overall plot for some reason.

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: be on set in 5 kristen says

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: I'm literally behind you idiot

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: ok

BITCH IS TYPING…

BITCH: are you ever going to change my name?

THOMAS IS TYPING…

THOMAS: no

THOMAS CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘WILBITCH’

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: I don't know if that's better or worse

WILBITCH CHANGED CONTACT NAME TO ‘TOMS<3’

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: I hate you

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: <3

✯ ✯ ✯
SCENE THREE- SEARCH FOR…PAPER?

THE FAMILY ARE DIGGING THROUGH CARDBOARD BOXES WITH MORE FERVOUR

WILBUR: Hey, I found Techno's first training sword!

TECHNO: No way!

PHIL: Focus! We have to find Tommy's page!

THE BOYS RETURN TO SEARCHING

TOMMY: Wilbur, is this your notebook?

WILBUR: It is! These were the first songs I ever wrote… ‘For Techno’, ‘For Dad’, ‘For Tommy’ and… ‘For Mum.’

THERE IS A SILENCE

PHIL: Focus! If we don't find Tommy's page-

WILBUR: It's fine Dad! It's not like Tommy will get magically rejected from the family!

WHEN PHIL IS SILENT, WILBUR LOOKS UNCOMFORTABLE.

WILBUR: Right?

PHIL: Well…

THE FAMILY RESUME SEARCHING QUICKLY AND FRANTICALLY

A FEW MINUTES LATER, ALL THE BOXES ARE EMPTY AND THE FAMILY SIT ON THE FLOOR SADLY.

TOMMY: Well, if I get magically smited or something, it was nice to be your family. Even if it was only for 16 years.

WILBUR: I won't let you go.

PHIL: Wilbur-

WILBUR: No! Tommy's our brother! I won't lose him to some magic book! Family is by choice, not blood. I choose Tommy to be a Za. If that's not enough for some magic book, then I don't want it.

TECHNO: Has anyone put up a fight if their page is lost?

PHIL: Well, no, bit-

TECHNO: Then we'll fight. Tommy is our brother, with a page or without.

THE BOOK BEGINS TO GLOW.

PHIL: What?

PHIL OPENS THE BOOK TO THE GLOWING BLANK PAGE, WHICH HAS STARTED TO MAGICALLY WRITE IN TOMMY'S DETAILS.

EVENTUALLY, THE BOOK STOPS GLOWING.

THE FAMILY HUG

WILBUR: Tommy is always our brother.

PHIL: He is indeed.

END OF EPISODE

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Ǫ̸̪̠̝͖̻̦͖͍̼͇̟͖͚͔̱̞̤̠͔̭͖̼͔̘͍̫̥͉̰͕̥͎̹̿̑̑̀̽͜͝

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- PEAK STRENGTH

THESEUS AND DAEDALUS STAND IN FRONT OF A LARGE STACK OF ROCKS.

DAEDULUS: It's finally time. Today Theseus, you will take your first annual superhero exams. It is traditional for superheroes to take their exams two weeks before their birthdays. The first exam is strength. You must lift at least 500kg of rock to pass. Have fun!

THESEUS STEPS UP TO THE ROCK APPREHENSIVELY

THESEUS LIFTS A LARGE BOULDER AND ALMOST BUCKLES UNDER THE WEIGHT

DAEDULUS: You've got it! Only half more to go!

THESEUS: Great! This is [GRUNT] easy!

DAEDULUS: Don't worry, next year it's 600kg!

THESEUS LIFTS ANOTHER ROCK AND ALMOST COLLAPSES

DAEDULUS: You passed! You can put them down slowly whenever you're ready-

THESEUS DROPS THE ROCKS

DAEDULUS: Well… next exam!

DAEDALUS WALKS AWAY.

THESEUS: Hopefully that one is easier.

THESEUS FOLLOWS DAEDULUS

SCENE TWO- SHE A RUNNER SHE A TRACK STAR

DAEDALUS AND ACHERON ARE WAITING AT A RUNNING TRACK. THESEUS WAITS AT THE END, WRINGING HIS HANDS.

ACHERON: This is a 200 meter track. For this exam, you have to run it in 15 seconds. Slow pace, I know, but we have to start you easy. Whenever you're ready.

THESEUS: Right. Haha.

THESEUS ATTEMPTS TO STAND IN THE SPRINTING STARTING POSE, BUT FALLS. HE PREPS TO RUN, THEN STARTS RUNNING AT NORMAL HUMAN SPEED.

THESEUS REACHES HALFWAY

ACHERON: 7 seconds left!

THESEUS PANICS AND RUNS AT A SPEED THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT HUMAN.

ACHERON: 14.97 seconds! Well done Theseus! Light work, eh?

THESEUS IS PANTING

THESEUS: Mhm…

DAEDALUS: Last exam!

DAEDALUS AND ACHERON JOG OFF

THESEUS: I have to pass this exam. My family would be so disappointed in me if I didn't…

THESEUS: I'm coming!

THESEUS TRIES TO JOG, BUT FALLS AND EXCLAIMS IN PAIN

THESEUS GETS UP AND LIMPS TOWARDS HIS FAMILY

SCENE THREE- LITERALLY A GYMNAST

DAEDULUS, ACHERON AND HYPNOS STAND BY AN ATTACK COURSE. THERE ARE MANY OBSTACLES THAT REQUIRE STRONG PHYSICAL FORM. UNDERNEATH EVERY OBSTACLE IS A POOL OF NEON GREEN PAINT.

HYPNOS: So, all you have to do for this exam is get through all the obstacles. If you hit the paint twice, you fail. No time limit. Go on, you can do it!

THESEUS: Yep! Right, I'll just… start.

THESEUS CLIMBS ACROSS MONKEY BARS EASILY, UNTIL THEY START MOVING AND GROWING SPIKES. HE MAKES IT ACROSS WITHOUT HITTING THE PAINT.

THESEUS CLIMBS THROUGH A SPIDERWEB OF ROPES AND NEARLY REACHES THE END, BUT HIS INJURED ANKLE SLIPS AND HITS THE PAINT.

ACHERON: Strike one!

THESEUS HOPS ACROSS THE RIVER OF PAINT ON SMALL ROCKS CLEARLY DESIGNED FOR ONE FOOT. HE SLIPS A FEW TIMES, BUT SAVES HIMSELF BEFORE HE HITS THE PAINT.

HYPNOS: Final obstacle!

THESEUS STANDS IN FRONT OF A LARGE ROBOT DESIGNED TO HIT HIM. HE RUNS, DODGING, BUT CANNOT SEE A WAY TO STOP THE ROBOT UNTIL HE NARROWLY MISSES BEING HIT. HE CATCHES A GLIMPSE OF A RED BUTTON ON THE PALM OF THE ROBOT. HE SLIDES, AND WHEN THE ROBOT HITS HIM HE CRASHES TO THE GROUND AND CRUMPLES. THE ROBOT FREEZES, AND THESEUS CRAWLS TO THE FINAL LINE, BEFORE COLLAPSING.

HYPNOS: THESEUS!

THESEUS: Did I…pass?

DAEDALUS: Mate, are you okay?

THESEUS: Yeah just…twisted my ankle after the run. And nicked my hand on the bars, scratched my face on the ropes and put way too much pressure on my ankle during the hops.

DAEDALUS: You should've told us! We wouldn't have made you take the exams if you were injured.

THESEUS: Didn't want you to be disappointed in me.

ACHERON: We would never be disappointed in you for not doing something due to injury. Rest now.

THESEUS: Thanks. Love you guys.

END OF EPISODE

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✯ ✯ ✯
WILBITCH—TOMS<3

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: wait do we have a canon timeline?

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: oh to be young and innocent again

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: nah big money couldn't give less shits about continuity. the only reason they gave a date is to hype up future episodes, like a birthday or more exams

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: joyous. are all tv shows like this, or just underpaid kids tv?

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: it varies. this is pretty standard though, timelines only really happen in shows where time is a plot point or if there is a time limit. for small family shows, a year can last nine seasons or an episode.

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: you sure know a lot about tv shows. done a lot, have you?

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: ha! no. i normally hate doing tv shows as they stick me on year-long contracts that I can't escape. I'm only doing this one as a favour for phil. they're recasting me next season. you'll have a new brother.

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: oh nooo how ever will I cope without you belittling me

WILBITCH IS TYPING…

WILBITCH: you love me really

TOMS<3 IS TYPING…

TOMS<3: keep telling yourself that
✯ ✯ ✯

P̶̡̧̳͇̣͎̫̳̪̳͓͓̮̰̻̗̼̮̦̫̫͔̳̣̪̖̥̬͔̯̘͇͔͕̍́͗͆̐̈́́̈́̏̈́͋̔̏̔̔̓͒̄̈́́̈́̃͑̄͛͒̓͑̕͜͠͝ͅ

Chapter Text

SCENE ONE- PHOTO OP

Tommy is running through the hallways of his house. He runs into a wall and flops to the floor. He sighs and stares up at the ceiling.

TOMMY: I'm bored.

Silence.

TOMMY: I'm sooooo bored.

Silence.

TOMMY: I'm so incredibly bored!

Silence.

Tommy sits up, looking around. He is clearly annoyed that nothing has manifested to clear his boredom. He decides to play a game with himself.

TOMMY: Bet I can run up this whole wall and touch the ceiling!

The ceiling is the height of around 3 Tommys. Tommy runs into the wall, stubs his toe and exclaims in a cartoon-like fashion while clutching his injured foot.

TOMMY: OW!

Tommy glares at the wall like it has committed several crimes. He then traces along the paneling deep in thought. He is just about to leave the corridor when his hand catches on something.

TOMMY: Huh? What's wrong with the-

He cuts himself off as he studies the feather shape that protrudes from the wall. It is barely noticeable, thin and matches the shade of the wall exactly. Tommy has never noticed it before.

TOMMY: Please be a secret wall, please be a secret wall-

Tommy presses the feather. Nothing happens. He presses again. Nothing happens. He tries a few more times, from various angles. Nothing happens. He sighs, and moves away from the wall. However, he trips on his undone laces and falls towards the wall. His hand catches the feather and it falls to the floor. When Tommy looks up, he sees the button on the wall and presses it excitedly.

TOMMY: Yes! I knew it!

The paneling opens up into a small office. The room is unnaturally tidy. There is no windows, so Tommy pulls the string hanging from the ceiling and a weak light flickers on. We see the room is covered in boxes drenched in dust.

TOMMY: Woah…

Tommy moves towards a box that reads ‘Tommy’. He opens the box, and all that is in the large box is a pile of photos. Tommy pulls a few out haphazardly, only to stare at photos of his childhood he had never seen before.

TOMMY: This was Christmas! And my birthday- I look about six or seven? And my first hero costume… me using my powers… how have I never seen these before?

Tommy continues to dig through the photos, before pulling out a photo of him and his mum. He does not say anything, but holds the photo to his chest. Then, he looks around. There are boxes labelled ‘Wilbur’ , ‘Technoblade’ , ‘Phil’ and a few without names. Tommy darts towards the boxes, but holds himself back.

TOMMY: I should show Wilbur and Tech! I'm sure they'd love these, they're all sentimental like that.

Tommy runs out of the room excitedly. A photo falls behind him, we see a photo of his mother stained with tears from years before.

SCENE TWO- BROTHERLY LOVE

Camera pan onto Wilbur and Techno sat in the living room. Wilbur is plucking his guitar and Techno bandaging bloody knuckles. Offstage, we hear Tommy running. Wilbur chuckles. Tommy bursts into the room, out of breath.

TOMMY: Will! Techno! I found … found….

TECHNO: Breathe, kid. I'm sure whatever you found isn't going to disappear in a few minutes.

Tommy takes a comically large breath in, then exhales. He then resumes speaking at almost unintelligible speed.

TOMMY: I was really bored and so I was exploring and then I ran into a wall and lay on the floor and then I ran into the wall and then I fell and then I saw a button! And I pressed it-

WILBUR: Survival instincts of a pillow, this one.

TOMMY: -And then I found this room with loads of pictures of us and there's some of you two too and-

Tommy takes a deep breath in.

TOMMY: Come see!

Techno and Wilbur share a look, then follow their brother.

SCENE THREE- BOXES AND BOXES

The brothers enter the room. Tommy rushes straight to the boxes, but Wilbur enters more cautiously, looking around. Techno swipes a finger and raises an eyebrow at the dust. Wilbur spots his box first, then Techno spots his.

TOMMY: Go on, open it! It's alright!

Wilbur cautiously opens his box, then gasps at photos of a younger him. Techno follows suit, and the two older brothers’s eyes glisten as they stare at memories of their childhood.

WILBUR: I wonder how long these have been here for…

TECHNO: I think the main priority here is why they're here. Do you think Dad knows?

TOMMY: He can't, right? If he did, why would he hide them? Dad always says ‘Don’t keep secrets’.

There is silence as the brothers think this over.

WILBUR: Hey look, Tommy, Techno had a bob era!

Techno attempts to wrestle the photo away from Wilbur, but Tommy glimpses it before it is takes away. It depicts a preteen Techno with pink hair cut in an unruly bob.

TECHNO: Don't act like you're not jealous. Wilbur tried to grow his hair out and got mad it didn't get as long as mine.

WILBUR: We were seven! Plus, I'm sure your hair isn't natural. No one's hair grows that fast.

TECHNO: Maybe I'm just better.

The brothers argue and Tommy laughs as they reveal more and more memories. The noise attracts Phil, who freezes in the doorway when he sees them. When the brothers notice Phil, they smile but the mood quickly changes when they notice the fear on his face.

TOMMY: Dad! Look what we found!

Phil flies down the hallway, and the brothers race after him.

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“Ten minute break, everyone!"

Tommy smiled and walked over to William and Oliver, who were gushing over the prop photos. William noticed Tommy, and beckoned him over.

"Look Thomas, this one is so cute!” William cooed over an edited photo of child Oliver, photoshopped to have show-accurate hair.

“Don't worry, yours are here too." Oliver grinned, to which Tommy promptly flushed red and covered his face as the two older men laughed.

They spent the next few minutes perusing the photos, laughing and groaning at some particularly funny ones, until Kristen shouted for places. Just before they went onstage, William turned to Tommy and said in the sweetest voice imaginable:

“I hope you trip on Oliver's wig."

Before Tommy could react William had run onstage, but Tommy wasn't going to let him get away that easily. He ran after the older man, who clearly was not expecting it and threw his arms around his neck. William crumpled as Tommy laughed his heart out. When William turned, there was a sinister shine in his eye.

"Oliver, Tommy stepped on your wig!”

Tommy cowered under the piercing gaze of Oliver Grey as he stumbled over his words trying to explain and William cried with laughter.

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SCENE FOUR- REMINISCE

The brothers follow Phil into the living room, where he stops.

TOMMY: Dad! Are you okay?

PHIL: You weren't supposed to find that room.

TOMMY: What?

Tommy reaches out a comforting hand to Phil, who crumples to the floor at the touch. The brothers rush forward to comfort him.

PHIL (between sobs): She wanted you all to be able to look back on those days and smile. She was so set on making sure you never forgot you were loved since the second you were born. I promised her I'd never let you forget but… I couldn't face seeing those photos and knowing that she wasn't here to take anymore.

The brothers hold their dad as he cries, and the camera fades out on a photo that fell to the floor. The whole family, including their mother, smile at the camera.

END OF EPISODE

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

̶̢̧̝̗̯̗͉̣͓͍̱̬̲̪͖͔̮̬̟͕̱̬̣̐̋̈̀͆̿̅̇͊̌̾̓̐̂́̿͛̍̐̂̈́̈̓͑̑̍̏͛̈́̓͐̂̈́̅̐͐̽͜͠͠ͅM̴̢̢̨̡̧̛͚͙̫̭̰̼͓̠̪̪͖̝̲͈͈̪̤̜̤͛́̏̊̎̊̽́̀̈́͂̽́̽͑̋͛͑̈́͐̄̒͑̓̓͂͗̐̃̐̑̚͘̚͜͝͝͝ͅ