Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The same day as the battle in Draithus

Dain

„Mairi“, my voice thundered through he halls of Riorson House. My steps entered the choir of echoes as I ran down the hallway to the trainings room. The tip of her blonde hair disappeared around the corner and my hands clench to fists.
There was still fresh blood dripping from our hands, the flight leather raking like mud and lifeless bodies. The sulfur from Cath's breath still burning in my nostrils.
„Gods“, I grumble. „MAIRI“, I yell, rounding the corner just seconds after her and immediately stopping at the sight. Sloane was standing in the middle of the training gym. It was completely empty. Just her. Silence filled the room and the midday sun glinted through the windows on the upper walls, casting huge shadows onto the soft floor. Sparks of dust danced in the light. Her hair had a gold tint in this light. Gods, she was beautiful.
„I-I want to be alone please“, her voice almost broke my heart. She siphoned. Successfully. I didn’t have the chance to talk to her since her and Thoirt stormed back home, always just out of reach. Home. My heart stuttered. Had this become home? My home was Basgiath, but I felt like home was everywhere where I could rest. Does my father being in Basgiath make it a home? Surely not.

„Mairi, please“, I walked over to her, my boots leaving dirty marks on the floor, hilariously big ones in comparison to hers I followed with my eyes, ending where she stood.
„I shouldn’t have left the barrier. I’m sorry. I’m dumb. I know it. But Mira is alive, so I guess its a draw. One point for me, one for you. I’m still mad at you but I’m to tired to listen to your lecture about following rules. Or that I should’ve trained my signet better. I just want to be alone. I’m tired. I’m just really, really tired“, her voice merely a whisper. It was weird, I never heard here voice this weak.
„You think I would lecture you?“, I whisper, stepping closer to her. She turned around and her beautiful blue eyes were so sad, it broke my heart. I wanted to grab her, shake her, hug her, gods, kiss her. My thoughts sent me stumbling and my eyes widened.
„You know what? If it helps, do it. But do it quick, I don’t want to cry in front of you, Aetos“, she snarled, clenching her jaw. Why was my heart racing? I didn’t wanted to lecture her. I wanted to tell her, that I’m proud of her. She did incredible. Absolutely incredible when she siphoned. It didn’t hurt. And I knew she was still holding back. She saved a life today. She did the opposite of what she did to Violet’s mum. Stray strands of hair were shining softly in the sunlight. She looked tired, exhausted even. Dark shadows lingered under her eyes, her lips where cracked, blood was smeared on her cheek.
„Aetos, please, I wanna-“,
„Sloane“, I interrupted her. Her eyes widened immediately. The tension in the room rising.
„Don’t call me that. It’s Mairi. You’re my wing leader, not my friend“, she hissed. Like a cat. I flinched, then huffed.
„I can call you however the fuck I want“
„Language, wing leader“, Sloane shot back. Her eyes were cold by now, not a single thing left of the tough girl I used to look at, fascinated by her power. This woman was feral. She was … empty.
„If thats everything I’m gonna go“, with a bump against my shoulder she walked passed me, but I grabbed her wrist, holding her back, making her stumble against my chest cause she was leaving so rapidly. For a heartbeat her eyes got soft, as if she was relieved that I held her back, but it disappeared in a matter of seconds.
„Stop touch-“
„You did great. Fucking great, Mairi. I just wanted you to know“, I hissed through clenched teeth, not able to control my voice further if I managed to open my mouth. Emotions washed over me. Pride, fear, anxiety and empathy. And gods, the feeling of taking care of her - not in a wing leader way. In a „tucking her under blankets and bringing her a tea“-way.
Sloane halted but shook her hand free.
„I could’ve killed you“, was the only thing she said before she turned back around and left the gym. The silence was defeating. I knew she never would’ve killed me. Because once you take a human’s life it will haunt you. And you would do anything to not having to do it again. And instead of taking the life of a bad person, like I did with Parrish, she took the life of someones mother. Lilith Sorrengail wasn’t a bad person. And I knew that Sloane would never forgive herself for killing her.
„But you didn’t“, I whispered into the empty gym.

One day later

Sloane

„Calm the fuck down!“, the voice of the second year rang in my ear as I pressed him down. This fingernails dug into my upper arms. My entire body was burning, screaming. I wanted to thresh. I wanted to kill, to hurt somebody. Everything hurt. My head, my mind, my soul.
„I tapped out!“, he yelled, banging his hand onto the mat, but I needed to see blood. More than the bit that dripped down his eyebrow, leaving gross stains on my fighting leather.
„Mairi!“, someone yelled but I pulled harder, my dagger sinking into his clothes, ripp, one layer gone. Ripp, second layer gone.
Marked one. Let go. Thoirt’s words thundered through my body.
I’m sorry, I can’t.
„FUCKING HELL!“, the second year screamed and warm blood ran down my hand where I was pressing the blade into his rips.
„MAIRI!“, my ears tipped up. When I lifted my gaze for a heartbeat I caught his eyes. Warm, soft hazel. But angry. Furious. My heartbeat picked up and I clenched my jaw as anger and pure fear bursted through my veins. The anger in his eyes vanished and I pressed my eyes shut, growling, still fighting the boy underneath me, who constantly tried to slip out of my grapple. If I pressed hard enough, I would get tired, right? The pain would subside, right? It would get easier, right? I wanted it to get easier. I couldn’t take it anymore.
„STOP IT“, hands where on me. Big hands, pulling, grabbing as I threshed against them, swinging my dagger, trying to hold onto the body underneath me with my hands, then my legs.
„MAIRI, I SAID STOP IT“, Dain yelled, flipped me around and pressed me to the mat, his knee in my back, holding me down as his one hand held my arm flipped onto my back and the other one grabbing my dagger, throwing it away. My entire body shook but slowly I felt the adrenalin drop.
„I’m gonna fucking kill her!“, someone snarled close to me. I let my body relax, as far as the shivers would let me. Dain said something but I didn’t hear it. „Kill her“ was thumping in my brain. Again, again and again like an echo.

I would never let that happen, marked one. Thoirt said in my head. But I would.
„I wish someone would“, I whispered. The first words in what felt like ages. Dain’s hands relaxed immediately and when I looked up I saw him staring at me.

I’m not going to repeat my words.

„Get off me, Aetos“, I hissed, very well aware off his heavy body on top of me. His big, warm hand pressing mine to my back. Shame crept over me, seeped through every single hole and crevice of my body as realization hit me. I almost killed another cadet. But he said something I couldn’t let slip.
„We will meet in the classroom in 5 minutes. If you’re not there, I will do everything in my power to not let you see a training gym from the inside ever again. You may leave now“, he said. He was using his wing leader voice and a shiver rushed through my body as heat and shame both fought in my belly. With red cheeks I pressed up from the mats and got to my feet.
„I didn’t hear you, Mairi“, Dain growled.
„Yes. I will be there“, I replied. Dain nodded.
„Good“.
4 minutes later I stepped into the empty classroom and sat down on the table farthest to the right. It was silent as classes were already over and most students weren’t in the lecture halls anymore.
The door crashed into the wall on the inside as Dain stormed into the room. With a thump the door shut again with just a short hand movement of the big, brown haired man.
He wasn’t even looking at me when he went through his hair, raking through it. Fingers splayed. A big sigh escaping his mouth. He seemed upset but also unsure. Something about him felt weird. I couldn’t lay my finger on it.
„Dain, I’m-“, but he interrupted me with one look. The room felt colder. And disappointment spread on his face. I blushed with shame.
„It’s Aetos, cadet“, he said dryly. I felt like a sudden distance had built up. I was usually spending my time with riling him up, but since yesterday I was fucking furious with him. But suddenly it felt like he took a step back. Our relationship was always weird. He was the one who is responsible for Liam’s death and even though it’s still something so incredulously present that I think about if every time I see him, I don’t blame him. Not anymore. I stopped a while ago. When I started loosing hope. After draining Violet’s mother. When everything felt pointless. When I realized I could take life so easily. I dropped anger regarding him. I did stay reserved, but I couldn’t blame him anymore. I blamed Liam. He did was he did best. But I was angry at him. He left me. Because of Sorrengail. This fucking loyal asshole. It wasn’t fair but maybe that is a part of grief. It doesn’t have to make sense.
„I’m sorry“, I nodded, not meeting his eyes. His biceps bulged as he crossed his arms. There was so much emotion splayed on his face, I could see it, but he was trying hard to cover it.

It’s called caring
What, he’s caring about Mairies now?
You sarcastic little brat, Thoirt barked.
Stop seeing yourself as a sister in the first place, marked one. Start seeing yourself as a person.
I will always be a sister.
I never said you won’t.

„Don’t look at me like that“, I said, trying to sound fierce.
„Like what?“, he snarled.
„Like you’re disappointed. Not necessary. I’ve got enough disappointment regarding myself in me. I don’t need yours too. Who knows who’s gonna get hurt next“, I huffed, grabbing the edge of the desk I was sitting on.
„Hurt? You almost killed him, Mairi“, Dain came closer, his hands fists on both sides of his body.
„Well, if you remember correctly, Mr. Codex, this is a fucking war college!“, I yelled. My emotions tipped and I stood up as well, remaining learned against the desk. He was towering over me, eyes dark, hair tussled like he flew this morning. The brown curls were a tiny bit too long at this point. You could see we just arrived back from Aretia. His beard was neatly trimmed, the scar on his chin twitching as his jaw clenched. His eyes were dark. So, so angry.
„HE TAPPED OUT“, Dain yelled and slammed his hands onto the desk left and right of my hips.
„Everything is allowed but if someone throws the towel you fucking stop. That’s respect. And I saw it in your fucking blue eyes that you didn’t even hear it“, I felt his breath on my face. He was so close. I was fierce, but this was indeed quite uncomfortable and dangerous. I tried to cover the fear.
„Back up“, I growled.
„Don’t tell me what to do, cadet“, he huffed.
„Back up, Aetos, I swear“, I added reaching for his upper arms, digging my nails into them. The second I touch him, his eyes widened. Was he afraid of me? The sudden realization left me breathless. Yes, I liked it when men considered me as worthy, able to break their fucking necks, but I wouldn’t hurt him. Not with my body. Maybe while siphoning but not with something I can control like my body. I was a weak little thing in comparison to him. I mean, I was strong, no doubt, but Dain was muscles, strength and … he was afraid. We looked into each other eyes, before he slowly backed a step away. My heart thundered in my chest.
„I’m sorry, I got carried away“, his eyes stayed fixed on mine and he swallowed.
„You’re suspended from sparring“, he said, crossing his arms again, turning around, walking towards the door.
„WHAT?“, I yell.
„You heard me, Mairi“, his hand landed on the door but I pushed the table over and he hesitated. My anger bloomed in me like flowers in mai. It exploded. Red flashing in my eyes. My nostrils fluttering. He hesitated.
„We arrived yesterday, Mairi. One damn day back in Basgiath and you act like an animal. You are suspended from sparring. I will inform your teachers. You will work on your signet with me. Tomorrow in this classroom at 5pm. If you don’t show up, I will get you on a leave“, he said without turning around, just looking over his shoulder, his eyes not reaching mine.

„Pfff yeah maybe send me to the front line, would make everyone’s lives easier. I can live out my anger and if I’m lucky I wont return home. One less problem for you, wing leader“, I huffed. Dain turned around. Anger blushing his cheeks red.
„And stop this fucking talk about wanting to be killed. We fought together in this fucking fight in Draithus to save all of our lives. I rushed after you cause you didn’t follow my commands, endangering my own life and Cath’s. For once be fucking grateful Mairi you made it out alive, your brother would’ve been grateful“, he spat. Ice ran down my back. I had never heard him use these harsh words.

The pretty man is not wrong.
Shut up.
Someone’s gotta say it.
I said shut up.
Be careful with your words, human.
Do I have to repeat myself?

„He would’ve been proud of you“, he whispered. For a short moment his face softened, then it hardened again.
„Understood?“, he yelled a heartbeat later. Tears clouded my vision and he noticed because he dropped his gaze to my cheek.
„Understood“, I said toneless and another heartbeat later he was gone.
My head hurt and I let it all out. The tears, the pain, wailing like a baby.

It’s not easy, marked one, Thoirt said in my head
Shut up, I replied and pressed my back onto the cold stone wall of the classroom.
I will not. It’s not easy. But you always made it. I huffed at her words.
At which price?
Lives, lost and saved ones.
Not lost. Killed. Don’t do that to me, Thoirt. I whispered in my head.
You are doing that to yourself, human.

Chapter Text

Dain

She was sweating as she was sitting across from me. Yesterday was a nightmare. Her words were still booming in my head. There seemed to be so much anger and anxiety bubbling inside of her, and it took up way to much space in my head.
„Breathe, Mairi“, I said through clenched teeth as she was held onto the little plant's leaves. Two plants. One on the right, one on the left.
„I am“, she muttered. Suddenly the one plant crumbled and the other sprouted a flower.
„Too much“, I said, sighing as the crumbling plant slowly died off.
„What the fuck do you expect from me, Aetos?“. Her eyes jumped up, together with my heart. So blue. Just like Liam. So fucking beautiful. My fingers started to tingle.

I’m sure that’s a perfectly normal reaction to another human, huffed Cath.
I’m just empathetic, I replied, counting the freckles on her fair skin.
If that’s what you wanna call it, my dragon mumbled.

„What, are you asking your dragon for answers or are you coming up with a dumb answer yourself, wing leader?“, Sloan hissed and dropped her hands and her eyes.
I like her.
Shut up, Cath.

I took a deep breath, massaging the bridge of my nose.
„Try to wilt the plant. Not drain it entirely“
„It’s hard, these things are flimsy as fuck“. Carefully she brushed over the pot of the dead plant. She seemed sorry.
„Well, perfecting it in smallest detail will train your control“
„I wont use it again, Dain“, Sloane sighed and leaned back in her chair. She was driving me insane.

According to Thoirt you do the same to her, Cath laughed.
Stop talking about her or me with other dragons, I replied.
Who said I started the conversation?
Why did Thoirt talk to Cath about how Sloane felt about me?

„Aetos“, he said. She swallowed but didn’t answer.
„If this is still to hard for you, we need to take a step back and go onto a courser level“, I sighed and stood up. Her eyes followed me and made my heart beat a bit faster when I took of my flight jacket and threw it over the chair. With a few quick movements I rolled up the sleeves of my shirt and sat back down. Still her eyes were fixed on my arms and I couldn’t help but spot her lip disappearing into her mouth. A small smile grew on my face.
„Are you drooling because of the sight or are you afraid of what’s gonna come next, Mairi?“, I grumbled and sat back down on my chair. Her eyes shot up and I could see her walls go down again.
„Don’t overestimate your impact, Aetos, I’m surrounded by attractive, athletic men 24/7 in this school“, the mask was back. I started to be able to read her. She tried to be flirty, strong, but I knew there was something behind this mask. Something I would’ve loved to explore. Because her character kept rattling me so much, I needed to know why. Because I still felt guilty and responsible for Liam’s death? Is that why I couldn’t get close to her?
„Attractive, hm?“, I smiled and leaned onto the table, my forearms against the cold, smooth wood. Then, finally, she dropped her eyes, seeming to focus.
„Shut up“, she replied.
„Language, cadet“. She nodded but didn’t say anything.
„Put your hands on my arms“. Immediately her eyes shot up again. Her mouth dropped open and I had to pull my eyes away from her lips.
„What? No. Absolutely not!“. With a grating sound her chair got pushed back and she stood.
„Mairi, sit back down“, I snarled, twisting my palms up, hoping to seem more open and peaceful.
„I’m n-not gonna do that again“, she stuttered and backed away a step.
„You have two options. You either sit down and put your hands on my arms or you will be suspended from sparring another three weeks additionally“. Anger started burning inside of me, I didn’t wanted to punish her, but after all I was her wing leader and she needed to get her signet under control.
She crossed her arms, her eyes piercing mine. I was almost sure she was having a dialogue with her dragon in that moment.
„I could’ve killed you“, she said after a moment of deliberating if she should say it and I saw a tiny bit of fear in her eyes, slipping through the mask.
„I’m gonna repeat myself once, Mairi. You did not. And you know you never would“
„How can you be so sure? Why do you think I wouldn’t kill you because of Liam?“, her voice was low, raspy, but she seemed unsure. I pulled my arms back, crossing them myself.
„Do you wanna have this talk now? Really?“. I lifted my eyebrows in question. I was not ready for this talk. I was having this dialogue in my head, almost every single night. Sloane screaming at me. Crying, throwing things after me. Sloane refusing to siphon on the battle field because I was the one telling her to and she wouldn’t follow my commands. The „what if“ if she would’ve refused in Draithus. Every fucking night. Mira dying, Brennan burning out while trying to save her. But it was the thought of Sloane that made me choke. Her realizing she could’ve saved them. All the consequences crashing into her. So much weight, she would drown. And I couldn’t save her. Because she didn’t trust me enough. Because she didn’t like me enough. Because I got her brother fucking killed. Because I’m an idiot, a total asshole. And I would understand. I would understand if she would never forget me. But I couldn’t help it. Something drew me toward her. It wasn’t guilt - not only. It was …

You like her, Cath whispered softly. So softly I never heard him speak. I swallowed. Air leaving my lungs and refusing to return.

My eyes still fixed on her. And hers on mine.
She didn’t answer. So I did. „We are not having this talk right now. And I’m sure you’re not going to kill me, because I trust you. You saved Mira, and Brennan. And you would do it again, even though you were fucking afraid out there. And I admire you for that decision. And I would really appreciate if you’d come back here and try to siphon some energy from me, store it in you and give it back to me immediately. Like a flow“. My voice was gentle. Patient. Maybe I was too hard to her. But I was so afraid of her shutting down completely, that I got desperat when I screamed. Great wing leader.

You are a great wing leader, human. Cath was my rock. When the sea around me was screaming and rushing in on me.

Sloane dropped her eyes, nodded and walked over to me.
„Okay, I’ll try“, she said as she sat back down.
„That would be enough“, I added, holding my hands out again. She flinched. I wasn’t sure if it was because of my words of because of the grey handprints on my underarms.
„It doesn’t hurt. Its just a bit cold, when someone touches it“, I said, following her eyes over my skin. It prickled under her stare.

Again, Sloane nodded and put her hands down. Shivers rushed through my body where her fingertips touched my skin and my heart fluttered.

Sloane

Cold. The skin was cold when I touched it. I was emotionally completely ruffled. I needed a nap. This was not the right moment to do this, but Dain was generous and kind. For once. I wasn’t an asshole, he deserved to be treated fairly too.
„Take your time“, he whispered and before I closed my eyes, I caught his. Warm, light brown. Goosebumps spread on my skin. I nodded and felt the power flowing through me.
Slowly, Thoirt whispered.
First it felt like a soft tug. Then it became stronger and stronger. „Because I trust you“
I swallowed and reached for more power. Setting one foot into the living room I my mind. Liam’s laugh echoes through the room. A warm fire flickering in the fireplace. It smelled like wood, oak and citrus.
Suddenly my heart started beating faster as though I reached a deeper level of his power. My eyes opened, catching his, blown wide.
„Mairi“, he whispered but I felt myself slipping away. My hands started shaking as his power kept flowing through me.

He’s giving too much, I whispered to Thoirt.
He is not giving, marked one.
I-I’m taking?
The panic grew bigger. Dain’s eyebrows furrowed and he shuffled in his chair, sitting up higher.

Take control, human, Thoirt’s voice was harsh.
„That would be enough“. Trying was enough.

I pulled my hands back, the emptiness of the missing contact making me heart stumble and for a second black shimmered on the edges of my eyes. Dain looked a bit more tired, still staring at me.

That’s not what I mean with control, but well, Thoirt sighed.
I was going to drain him completely, I stuttered in my head.
Do you think I would let that happen? Do you think he would?
I don’t know if I would. Silence filled the bond.
Remember I chose you. And I didn’t choose the person you want to see in yourself. I chose a Mairi.

Dain reached for my hand and my heart stumbled and I blushed.
„You alright?“, he asked. Voice low, soft, gentle.
„You did good, Mairi“, he said and forced a smile.
„You’re tired“, my voice was toneless. He swallowed.
„No, I’m fine, I-“, „I took too much“, I interrupted him.
„We’re training, Mairi. It would be boring if everything would go perfectly first try“, he smiled again and this time it was generous. My heart dropped. I hadn’t seen this smile often. When I did I would’ve made fun about something and then I would earn an eye roll and an angry stare. Gosh, he was beautiful. The smile warmed me to my core.
„It’s okay. I am fine“, he said, gently squeezing my hand. I pulled my hand back.
„Imma give it back, give me your arms“, I said toneless. Afraid of the shift in the room. His warmth and what it did to my heart. He hesitated but nodded. When I looked down on his arms and the grey scars they seemed darker. Dain realized my stare immediately.
„That usually happens when it gets cold too“, he said quickly, hastily. Sure, blood circulation. Right?

Right?
Whatever you say, human.
Thoirt, did I do this, the voice in my head wobbled, my breath getting stuck in my throat.

„Mairi, come back to me“, Dain said and my head snapped up.
„Don’t hide in these thoughts. You’re here now. Focus. This is still a training session“. The wing leader was back. And with fear in my heart I put my hands back on his skin, feeling him flinch. I wanted to run. As fast as I could. But I still had his power and I couldn’t hold on to it.
„Give it back, you can do it“, Dain said like he could read my thoughts.
With anxiety crushing my chest I started opening the access to my power. I stumbled into the living room, but something was off. Liam wasn’t laughing. It didn’t smell like something.
„Slowly, Mairi, you’re doing it too fast“, Dain’s voice was distant and harsh. Almost panicky.
Then I smelled it. Fire.
„Mairi!“, Dain’s voice got louder.
Power rushed through my veins, out of my finger tips into his arms, the skin burning hot underneath my fingers. My body was buzzing.
„Take control“, Dain said. His voice muffled. Dark dots danced on the edges of my sight.
„SLOWER“, Dain snarled and I snapped my head up.

Kill the flame, marked one.
Which flame?
You know which one.

Dain’s jaw clenched like he was in pain. Was I burning him.
„Don’t take them off, you’re almost done“, he pressed, out of breath.
„I’m burning you“, I said, my voice strangled. I tasked ash on my tongue. Dain furrowed his eyebrows.
„Wha- you’re not burning anything, Mairi“, he said. My head started spinning.
Wrong fire.
Then I saw it. I was not burning Dain. My hands weren’t on fire. My brain was. The living room was burning.
Control, whispered Thoirt.
„Nothing is burning. Everything is okay. Breathe“, Dain whispered.
„I’m here“, he added. „You’re doing good. I trust you, Sloane“. His words vibrated through my chest. And then it was gone. The fire was gone. Like someone turned the light off and everything was back to normal. I heard Liam. The smell of citrus was back. No asked on my tongue.
Then I lifted my hands. Silence spread between us as we both looked down on Dain’s arms.
„You lied“, I said. Tears filled my eyes. The gray handprints of Jack Barlowe were red. A deep, dark red. They looked raw. Dain swallowed.
„Mairi, I think you might have pushed the power back too hard and too fast“, he stuttered.
„You lied“, I said again, lifting my head. Gods, his eyes were said.
„I hurt you“, I mumbled, standing up, shaking. Dain sighed and brushed his hand through his hair.
„It’s nothing, Its a risk I was willing to take“.

So much to wrong fire, I shot down the bond to Thoirt.
She said nothing. What, no reply? Nobody telling me the truth now?

„I can’t do this“, I said, strained voice, a few tears escaping my eyes.
„M-mairi“, he muttered, reaching for my face.
„Don’t you dare to touch me, Aetos“, I said shocked. And he realized. His hand stopped, like he was surprised.
„I-I was not going to-“, I shook my head at his attempt of explanation and walked backwards. He was not going to touch me face? Or not going to read my fucking memories.

Why are you not saying anything, I yelled at Thoirt.
He told me not to, she replied. I stopped. Almost stumbling.
Who
Cath

My stomach dropped. Anger rushing in my ears. All of the sudden, everything turned red. My body hurt. Everything hurt. Fear, anger and hate blinding me when I started running. But not towards the door.
„Sloane!“, he yelled a second before I jumped at him. I tumbled over the desk, feet first, hitting his chest, pushing him to the ground.
„IT’S NOT SLOANE TO YOU, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE“, I screamed, gripping his collar. It was ridiculous. He was so much taller and stronger than me. He could’ve easily flip me over, knock me unconscious.
„What is your fucking prob-,“, „Lying to me is one thing, Aetos, but telling my dragon to lie to me through yours, is something else. You filthy bastard“. My heart was racing, anger heating up my body. My fingers tightened around his collar, twisting it, the fabric cutting into his throat. His hands didn’t touch me. I was sitting on his chest, my knees pressing his upper arms down.
„I knew you were able to control yourself!“, he shouted back. His neck turned red, his cheeks as well. His chest was heaving, trying to catch a breath underneath my body. He was warm, hot even.
„You don’t get to decide about that. Not you, not Cath and not Thoirt“, I hissed. Leaning down to his face.
„I trusted you. And your fucking words, Aetos. You let me hurt you. Even though you know this is my biggest fucking fear“, I snapped, pressing my fist into his throat and he groaned. But still didn’t touch me. Water collected in his eyes as he tried to breathe. My entire body was shaking, anger ebbing and flowing inside of me
„Why don’t you defend yourself“, I yelled, lifting his head up and pushed it back down. A dull „thump“ coming from his head and he squeezed his eyes in pain. I let go immediately. Tears streaming down my face, like someone splashed ice cold water into my face. I didn’t only hold him down, I was about to smash his skull into the ground. Suddenly the world started spinning and I stood up, tumbled backwards. I lost control, I would’ve hurt him. My biggest fear - hurting others. And I just judged him for letting me do it, just to do it freely only minutes laters. Dain sat up as my back hit the desk and scratched the back of his head. No blood showed up on his hand.
„Cause you told me to not touch you, Mairi“, he said slowly. His face was soft now, still red from when I almost fucking choked him. He took a few deep breaths and even this ruffled he looked so fucking good. All emotions ran wild in my head. A deep sigh left his lips.
„Next time I’m trying to hurt you, or already do, fucking stop me, Dain“, I cried. Sniffing. In his eyes I saw restraint. Restraint to stand up and walk towards me. I saw fear.

Is is fear, marked one?
I don’t want to talk to you.
You have to.
Don’t tell me what to do. You betrayed me.

Dain swallowed than straightened up.
„I wont. I’m a big boy, I can take pain. And it’s Aetos, I will not tell you that again“, the wing leader voice boomed through the class room and I realized that this trainings session was over. The vibe in the room was completely off. A mix of disappointment, guilt, fear and something else, that made me incredible uncomfortable.
„I’m sorry“, I nodded, powerless, turning around, walking to the door. Before I opened it I turned around.
„Why does a wing leader accept a cadet to hurt him?“, a drip of sarcasm in there. It didn’t make sense. Why would he only fight with words. Dain dropped his eyes but lifted them again immediately.
„Maybe because I deserve it. But thats none of your fucking business. Get out“, he snarled, reached for the pushed away table and put it back in order, ignoring me.

Chapter Text

Dain

The next morning Sloane didn’t show up for breakfast. Last night was beyond exhausting. My mind wouldn’t shut up ever since. Nothing seemed the same. Before Draithus we had a weird relationship. Yes, she was constantly shooting against me, but I had ever felt so much hate as I did yesterday coming from her. Although she was right.

The wing leader is accepting critique? That’s new, Cath purred in my head.
The wing leader is a fucking asshole who deserves to be beat to fucking shreds by her, I reply, grabbing an apple, a banana and a muffin. She usually took the chocolate ones over the blueberry.
Is this a euphemism for some mating experiences humans solemnize?
It’s a euphemism for the revenge she deserves because I got her brother killed, I snarled, taking two steps at once on my way to her room.
Maybe even a wing leader should let their cadets decide what they deserve and what not. Besides from punishment, of course.
Maybe dragons should keep their noses out of our problems.
Maybe flying will be extra fun later.

I halted. Cath and I were strict with each other, but we never threatened each other - not really. It was exhausting to have someone in your head with you. I needed a break so I pulled my shield up and knocked on Sloane’s door.
„What“, an annoyed voice came from the other side.
„Open up, Mairi“, I sighed and leaned against the door frame, waiting for her. Footsteps resounded from the other side and a second later she opened the door. And gods, she looked terrible. Not regarding her beauty, which was absolutely disarming and blinding, but because how the strain was altering it. Her eyes were bloodshot and had huge shadows underneath them. Her nose was red. Her blond hair was braided but looked like she slept with it, countless of stray hair sticking out of it. She wore the exact same clothes as yesterday.
„What do you want“, she spat. My heart hurt. We needed to talk. She deserved the truth about why I didn’t stop her to hurt me. Not the little bit I gave her yesterday, that I felt like I deserved it.
„You didn’t show up for breakfast so I got you some“, I handed her the muffin and the fruits and turned to leave.
„Why do you care about if I ate or not“, she mumbled, turning around, walking back into her room.
„Cause you’re my cadet. What do you think?“, I huffed.
„I wouldn’t stand at your door with breakfast one day after you hurt me physically“, she snapped. God, I wish she would. The breakfast part. I was already in enough pain because of her.
Interesting
Leave, Cath
My silence made her look back at me. And I wished I could’ve been honest.
„You worked hard yesterday, you need fuel. Flying wont be easy today“, I just said. She huffed.
„Well since I don’t have sparring before that I will be fresh and fine“, she smiled. A toxic smile. I wanted a real smile. Or a laugh. The one she didn’t do a lot of. When she’s sitting with friends. I wish I’d be a friend.
„You’re allowed to come to sparring. But you have to watch. You wont touch anyone“. I heard her huffing again while I walked down the hallway.
„Aetos“, she yelled. I stopped immediately, turning around. She stood in her doorway.
„Thank you“, she said and lifted her muffin.
„Chocolate is my favorite“, she said more quietly and dropped her eyes.

Say it, Cath sighed
Stay out of it
After forcing me to talk to Thoirt yesterday you owe her to be nice for once, wing leader. You still haven’t apologized. His voice was harsh. But, unfortunately, he was right.
„I know“, I said and our eyes met for a heartbeat. Her eyebrows twitched and her mouth opened slightly. Then she blushed. I turned around as quickly as I could and left.
Humans, Cath sighed.
Shut it, I spat.

Sloane sat at the sparring ring, not saying a word with crossed arms. A few times our eyes caught but I couldn’t grasp what she was thinking. Yes, she was mad at me, rightfully so but I didn’t have the time to think about my feelings now.
Feelings, Cath snapped.
I saw a few riders from the First Wing go over to her and talk to her, but got distracted as Rhiannon had to report something to me. The sparring went on and I was constantly trying to decide if setting her out was a good idea or not. Rhiannon and Ridoc mumbled something next to me on the bench but I couldn’t understand.
„Aetos“, a voice thundered and I looked up, professor Kaori stood in the door and nodded for me to come over. We talked about flight training later, when Sloane suddenly pushed passed us, brushing my shoulder, running down the hallway.
„Excuse me, I need to-“
„Keep private things for after the lessons, Aetos“, Kaori said sharply. I stood up straighter.
„This is not private, this concerns my cadet. And since I’m the wing leader, I will take care of them“, I said with a calm voice. Something in Kaori’s eyes sparkled but he nodded and let me go. I jogged after Sloane, not able to find her at first. After looking for her at her room I finally found her while looking out of the window. She was a small dot next to a very big red dot - Thoirt.

Don’t ask me to contact her.
Can you at least see her, see if she's alright?
I see Thoirt, not the human you desire.
I do not de- can you get closer? As I might have to remind your, you guys are enormous and she is small.
You are the worst, Cath huffed and I saw red wings in the distance, landing closer to the flying field.
I sighed. It was way to obvious. Its not like a huge red dragon was the most inconspicuous way of stealth.
Nevermind. Just forget about it.
I turned around and even though everything inside of me wanted to rush outside, I went back to the sparring mats and tried to think of something else.

Chapter Text

Sloane

What is he doing here, I hiss down the bond to Thoirt. I saw Cath hundreds of meters away.
Well, we can fly to where ever we want to, Thoirt huffed.
It was raining like hell and I was a bit happy the raindrops hid my hideous tears streaming down my face. I wasn’t to cry easy, but words can hurt, and cuts too.
He just wanted to see if you’re fine. The wing leader said Cath is not allowed to ask me.

I sighed at her words. He learned. He didn’t apologize but apparently he doesn’t make the same mistake twice. I should keep a score to see how often Dain Aetos fucks shit up.

I’m not. But he shouldn’t know, I whispered down the bond. Thoirt just blew steam from her nose, but showing her agreement with a nod.
Why are you here marked one?

I sat down on her foot, being shielded from the rain by her head. Her scales where wet and I was already ice cold.
You’re gonna catch a cold.
Maybe catch one strong enough to end this misery.
He said you should stop talking that way.
Who?
The wing leader.
Shut up.
Should I get him?
You know what would be devastating? A rider killing his dragon.
Funny you think you could be able to do that.
I know where you’re ticklish. Thoirt huffed at my words and I felt a nice warmth flowing though me. The reason I came here. Yes, we annoyed each other a lot, but she just got me. I always felt like she was the only one who understood me besides Liam. She was my everything. I brushed over her blood red scales. It was scary how something so deadly can actually turn into a friend.
I can say the same thing about you, human. Her voice was gentle in my head and it felt like a caressing. Like a hug. She called me a friend.
Can I ask you something?
Sure.
I nibbled on my lower lip and sniffed. I was still exhausted from yesterday and everything that happened at the sparring ring.

Why was I so devastated to hurt him? Shouldn’t I feel relief? I’m not with a short temper usually, why does he upset me so much?

Thoirt was quiet, but she knew who I was talking about. I closed my eyes, focusing on her heartbeat I could feel in the blood vessels behind my back under her scales. Maybe it wasn’t the physical contact making me feel it, but our connection. Thoirt and I weren’t a good balance. We weighed the same, mentally. We thought the same way, we had the same flow. That explained her silence.

Marked one. I’m afraid you already know the answer. Yep, just as I thought. We were two peas in a pot. Well, a very, very big, deadly pea. And me.
You’re deadly, Thoirt said but hesitated.
I’m sorry.
Did you just apologize?
Even I might make mistakes.
You sure about that? I asked, sarcasm dripping from my lips.
Don’t we all?

Her words echoed in my head.
Voices where growing outside of my little bubble inside my head, where only closed eyes and self loathing will get you in. I opened them and saw him. Dain was walking over to me. Behind him Ridoc, Rhiannon and Sawyer. The First and Second Wing followed. With thundering booms dragons appeared one after another on the flying field. They never failed to amaze me, and, to be very honest, scare the shit out of me.
As we do, Thoirt chirped. I smiled up at her and we caught eyes. I loved her. Gods, I did.
„You alright?“, his voice immediately made my heart beat faster. His face was soft, the brown light curls already wet, dripping into his forehead. Slowly raindrops ran down his nose.
I suddenly felt Thoirt tensing behind me.

It’s just Dain, I mumbled.
It’s not about him. I lifted my head.
„Mairi?“, Dain asked but I was looking past him at the other riders approaching. Caroline Ashton smiled at me and winked. Ice spread in my chest as Thoirt dug a claw into the ground.

I’m gonna kill her, she hissed.
No, you’re not. This is my battle not yours.

„So, she is allowed to fly, wing leader Aetos? Sure about that? What if she accidentally almost kills another riders dragon because she doesn’t know when to stop?“, Caroline asked. Dain’s eyebrows jumped up.
„Excuse me?“, he asked, turning towards the rider of the First Wing. Tara followed behind her, catching Rhiannon and walking past us, over to her girlfriend.
„Sorry, Aetos, but to me it seems quite dangerous to have a rider part take at a training maneuver when she is a threat to other cadets“, Caroline crossed her arms. I didn’t look at her. I looked at Dain. Dain’s eyes darkened and he swallowed.
„Ashton, am I correct when I say that when I last checked you weren’t in line to make any decision regarding another riders punishments or allowances?“, he said. His voice strong. The wing leader one. Goosebumps trailed up my neck. He was protecting me. I blushed a bit.
„What would general Aetos think about a rebel threatening other cadets? And his son protecting her?“, Caroline snarled.
„This is a war college", he used me words and I swallowed. "I’m not gonna repeat myself Ashton. You are not in line to question any kind of decision. If you feel the need to report it to general Aetos, please do so, I will have the dialogue with him about my decision as a wing leader and why I made them. And now, please, make your way to Gleanne, the lesson will start soon“, Dain finished. My heart was racing. Caroline's ears turned red and she barred her teeth at Dain but Thoirt behind me pushed a breath of hot air out of her nostrils, making Caroline stumble.

If he protects my human, I will protect him, Thoirt said and I almost smiled. Almost.

Dain turned back around. His eyes lighter, his jaw not clenched.
„I saw you leaving earlier. Do you wanna talk about something?“, he asked, taking a step closer. He lifted his hand to reach for me but let it fall half way through.
„Talk with the wing leader or a …“, I stopped. A what? Was Dain a friend?
He could be more than that.
Stop it.
„Whatever you need“, Dain said softly.
She needs a boyfriend. I kicked Thoirt’s claw with my heel and she huffed loudly. Dain looked at my dragon than back to me.
„Overprotective much?“, he whispered and nodded towards Thoirt. She huffed again and snapped in his direction. Softly, quickly, as a joke. Cath beside her growled but I felt no tension at all in our bond and she opened a bit further, no tension in the bond with Cath either.
„I’m sorry“, he said and bowed his head to Thoirt.
He has manners. I like him.
Yeah, I got it by now.
Thoirt pushed her head forward and touched her nose to his forehead. He stumbled backwards from the impact but came to a stand to hold up against her huge head. My mouth fell open.
What are you doing?
Everyone around us went quiet. I had never seen a dragon touching another rider unless in battle.
„Is everyone having conversations without me again?“, I whispered, hoping only Dain and Thoirt could hear me. Dain snapped his head back. Looking at me wide eyed.
I told him you siphoned. Without him.
My mouth fell open. She betrayed me.
I am loyal to you, marked one, but I am also loyal to making sure you stay alive. He needs to know.
I did. I did siphon without him. But it was my signet, not his.
„Mairi, we talk later“, he said with a corse voice.

I could’ve told him myself, I yelled down the bond.
You wouldn’t. And your emotions are scaring me, and I want you to be safe.
By telling the man who is in responsible of my brothers death? Thoirt huffed at my words.
By telling the man who would kill to keep you save, human.
He wouldn’t.
You know thats not true. But keep telling yourself that.
Remember when you said to yourself you’re not mad at him anymore? My blood started boiling when she added that. She was using my own thoughts against me.
Yesterday showed me I couldn’t trust him. He let me hurt him. Even though he promised me he was not hurt, I shouted down the bond.
Have you spent one second to think about why he did that, human? Thoirt’s voice was so loud, I stumbled two steps back. Her face came close to mine. I bumped into Dain’s chest behind me and I felt his hands grab my waist as a respond. I was sandwiched between him and Thoirt. She was growling at me.

„What’s going on?“, Dain asked.

Cause he’s a fucking idiot?, I barked. Thoirt huffed.
Funny, but no. Think about, little human.
Don’t belittle me.
If you can’t think about a reason why the wing leader is wanting to help you control your signet and is willing to endure pain in exchange I might have picked the wrong rider. Cause I considered you smarter than that, blind human. Thoirt growled louder this time and Dain’s hands grabbed my hips hard, pulling me against him. Suddenly Cath snapped after Thoirt. She whirled around and did the same. Dain’s arm came around my stomach and we stumbled a few steps back, my boots dragging through the mud.
The two red dragons glared at each other but Thoirt let go, turned around and with thundering wings started off the muddy flying field and left towards the valley.
My heart was racing. Or was it Dain’s thundering against my back?

„Are you okay?“, he whispered very close to my ear. So close, goosebumps exploded on my skin.
My dragon just belittled me in front of my entire quadrant and their dragons. Tears burned in my eyes. I was not okay. And Dain knew that I siphoned without him. And now I probably had to tell him why. Embarrassment settled in my chest, nausea rising in my throat. His thumb gently brushed over my stomach.
„Yeah. Guess I wont fly today“, I whispered, shook off his arm, turned around and headed towards the barracks. I heard a laugh behind me. When I looked over my shoulder Caroline Ashton quickly put her hand to her mouth.
„Caroline“, Tara hissed. Her wing colleague looked over to her. Rhiannon, Tara, Ridoc and Sawyer sent daggers with their eyes towards her.
„What?“, Caroline sighed, turned around and walked towards her dragon. Mumbling started back up behind me when the shame still stung in my cheeks. I prayed to all available gods that Dain wasn’t following me. Suddenly something caught my shoe and I stumbled, falling face first onto the muddy grass. A few laughs rang behind me when I looked down my legs. A tendril of water held onto my foot. When I looked up and caught Caroline’s eyes, it dropped and she winked at me. Everyone was looking at me. Everyone. Tears were burning in my eyes, when I stood up, turned around and crossed the field.

Chapter Text

Dain

„What did you do?“, I asked slamming into her door an hour later. Sloane was sitting on her bed with crossed legs, her hair still damp. She was wearing a big shirt, that could be from Liam. I couldn’t see any pants so I just expected her to be in pajamas and the shirt was covering underwear. A short hot shower went through my body as my eyes fell onto her legs. A few bruises covered her shins. A bigger bruise, bloody covered her thigh.
„Hello Aetos, nice to see you, glad you’re coming to my room. Especially with the warning I received so I wouldn’t open the door in my underwear, oh, right, I didn’t receive a fucking warning and I didn’t open my fucking door“, she yelled. I closed the door behind me and threw a soundproofing rune disk onto her bed. She looked at it.
„What, are you planing on fucking me senseless and no one should hear my screams?“, she laughed. God, she was driving me insane.
„No, I’m trying to keep the entire quadrant from hearing your damn issues, Mairi, because you keep yelling at me“, I hissed, crossing my arms in front of my chest.
„Do I have to remind you that you stormed into my room? How do you expect a woman to react when you storm into her room and yell ‚What did you do‘“, she mimicked me, standing up, crossing her arms in front of her chest as well.
„Usually they’re quite happy and start undressing“, I snarled.
You’re an idiot, Cath sighed.
I know, I mumbled and if our bond could portrait clenched teeth, it would. I was an idiot. Why the fuck did I say that? Sloane didn’t answer. Her mouth fell open.
„What? You started with the dirty suggestions“, I said, walking over to her. She stared up at me. She was so damn beautiful. Even when she was angry. And I hated myself for even thinking it.
„What did you do, Mairi?“, I said softer, leaning against her desk. I did notice her blushed cheeks and the pink spots on her neck. A very bitable neck I might add. Slowly she relaxed, sat down on the edge of her bed.
„Which part? The part where I siphoned? Where I got cut open? Or the part where my dragon embarrassed me in front of the whole quadrant? Or the part where I cannot breath when I think about siphoning because I’m afraid I accidentally kill people?“, I spotted tears in her eyes, but she didn’t invite them. She brushed them away and they were gone. Anger rose in me. The cut on her leg wasn’t an accident. It was an attack and it was fresh? I crossed over to her bed faster than I would’ve liked to. I squatted down on front of her. Her eyes were blown wide when she looked at me. The proximity hit me with a force I wasn’t expecting. Her smell was suddenly everywhere. She smelled like lavender. And a hint of citrus.
„Who cut you open?“, I said. My voice trembled with anger. Then my eyes dropped to her legs in front of me. Sloane stayed quiet.
„S-Mairi, please“, I whispered.
„If you wont tell me as a person you trust, tell me as your wing leader“, I swallowed. „It’s a command“. When I looked up she was looking at her legs. So I did again as well. Slowly she reached for the hem of her big shirt and pulled it back, revealing the rest of the nasty cut on the side of her thigh. It ended just shy of her pelvic. Without being able to hold back I reached for her skin. My fingertips brushed over her thigh, moving the muscle a bit, seeing how the cut moves. She flinched and hissed. Goosebumps exploded on her skin and I immediately let go of her.
„Sorry“, I whispered. A bit of blood gushed out of the wound.
„Fuck, sorry“, I said again and reached to the pockets of my second flight jacket as the other one was still dripping wet. I checked the pockets but couldn’t find anything to ease the blood flow.
„It’s okay“, she whispered, covering the cut with her hand - barely. It peaked out from underneath her slim fingers.
„No“, I said as soft as possible. With a sigh I stood up, took my jacket off, rolled my sleeves up and left her room to quickly return with paper towels from the bathrooms.
„Here“, I said, gently taking her hand away and putting the towels onto the open wound. She flinched again and I looked up to search her eyes.
„We need a healer, Sloane“, I said. The second I said it she looked up. I wanted to correct myself, but she didn’t fight me. I said her name because it just spilled out of me. I hated calling her Mairi. It reminded me too much of Liam. And I felt like I was getting closer to her, calling her Sloane. But of course I would respect her wished of calling her Mairi. It was a mistake. I got caught up.
„No“, she said and this time reached for my hand.
„It’s a deep cut, we need someone to-“, „Aetos“, she said. I looked up but she wasn’t looking at my eyes. She was looking at my hands. No, my arms.
Her hand started shaking and she dropped my hand in shock. The gray handprints of Jack that she turned red last night, by burning my skin, where lighter, almost gone.
„What the-“, I mumbled, reaching for them. The handprints were still a bit cold, but definitely warmer than before. The color was a silvery beige, not the harsh grey.
„Why didn’t you tell me?“, Sloane asked furiously. Surprised I looked back up.
„I didn’t know. This morning it was still a bit red and…“, I stopped, letting my fingertips run over the skin again. And again. Slowly realization set in.
„Wait, that means-“, I turn around, expecting a surprised Sloane but she looked a bit indifferent. Like something settled in her.
„Mairi“, I said, slowly, squatting back down in front of her again. She was avoiding my eyes.
„Did you know you could do this?“, my heart was pounding so fucking fast. That would mean she could potentially heal Xaden, maybe.
„Talk. To. Me“, I felt unsteady suddenly, grabbing her arms when it knocked on the door. We both froze. She shook my hands off aggressively.
„Sloane Mairi, open the door“. It was my fathers voice. I caught my breath. Fear flashed in Sloan’s eyes.
„I-I will…“, „No. Stay where you are“, I said through clenched teeth. „Aetos-“, „This is a command, cadet“. Her mouth closed and god, I hated the way she looked at me when I had to use my damn wing leader voice.
I opened the door to my fathers surprised face. Two infantries were with him and I cocked an eyebrow.
„Visiting a first year with two fighters and one dragon rider. Bit over the top, don’t you think, father?“. My word dripped from my lips.  The surprise settled and his eyes wandered over me, then past me, looking at Sloan. Only wearing a shirt. Immediately I stepped up to him, forcing him into the hallway, closing the door behind me.
„Dain, I’m not here to talk with you, let me through“, he muttered, his eyes cold. My entire body was fighting against the urge to hit his face.
„She is my cadet and I deserve to know what you want from her“. He crinkled his nose.
„According to what I just saw she is way more than your cadet, Dain“, he spat.
„She has a wound on her leg from an internal fight and because I needed to clear the room I wanted to see the wound. I decided we will get it mended by a healer. Now, what do you want?“. There could’ve been smoke coming out of my fathers ears the way he was looking at me.
„She’s suspended“, he said. The door behind me opened up. Sloane was, thank fuck, wearing pants and looking at the four people in front of her. She looked afraid. I haven’t seen her afraid a lot. So it bothered me lots.
„I’m what?“, she shot.
„It’s sir, cadet Mairi“, my father slurred. I huffed and rolled my eyes.
„Aetos, your can leave“
„I wont leave, she’s my cadet“, I shot back. My father clenched his jaw.
„She is suspended. She can go back to where she came from“. He turned around, wanting to leave.
„You cannot suspend her like that. You need a reason!“, I yelled. He stopped and turned on his heel. A smile playing on his lips.
„She endangered another cadet“
„Well, other cadets endangered her“, I replied, crossing my arms.
„It’s okay, really“, she whispered next to me but hell, it was not okay.
„But she didn’t almost die“, his voice thick and angry.
„Do you know it? The wound could’ve easily found her artery close to the pelvic. She could’ve bleed to death“. My heart pounded like hell at that thought.
„She will leave. Tomorrow. If she doesn’t give in, I will have her in the cells next to Barlow in a matter of minutes“.
„Sparring gets dangerous. Cadets die all the fucking time. SHE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING ILLEGAL “, I screamed, walking towards my father. This fucking asshole.
Need me? Cath asked.
Soon, I barked.
„She did, Dain. And it’s not up to your position to talk to me like that and if you don’t want to loose your position as wing leader I suggest you keep your mouth shut“. My fathers eyes glimmed with joy.
„You can not banish her. Not alone. It’s dangerous to leave the wards, you know that“, I tried to sound unbothered, but I wasn’t. I was shitting my pants. A slow smile spread on his face. Fuck.
„Then have fun accompanying her, Dain“, he said, turned around and left the hallway.

Sloane

„No“, I said, crossing my arms. Dain was pacing at the end of my bed. I was furious. Not because this fucking asshole Aetos senior banished me, but because Aetos junior over here managed to get a ticket to hell himself.
„Dain, you stay here. I will not-“, he interrupted me.
„It’s Aetos, cadet“, he snarled. His eyes were wild. „Fucking hell, Dain. You jump back and forth between being a wing leader and a— arghhh!“, I yelled as I stood up but I stumbled and almost fell over but he caught me before I did. My eyes dropped to my legs. There was a huge blood stain on my pants.
„Sit down“, he said. I opened my mouth but I realized it wasn’t worth it.
„I don’t want to hear a single word. Sit the fuck down, Mairi“, he yelled. I winced and backed up, sitting on the bed. I spotted his shaking hands when he reached for the waistband of my pants. Then he stopped.
„Gods“, I sighed, pulling the pants down. Fucking gentleman. I immediately winced when I pulled the fabric over my leg.
„Tell me why you siphoned. Now“, something told me he already knew it. I clenched my jaw.
„I do not have time for your fucking stubborn bullshit. Tell me what you did and then you tell me who did this to you. I have a fucking shit day, Mairi and I swear I cannot be patient anymore“, he was so angry, it scared me. I felt like he put on a mask, hiding who he was a second earlier. Minutes earlier. When his fingertips brushed over my skin. When there was genuine concern in his eyes. Not it was bland hatred.

It’s not hatred. It’s fear. Thoirt whispered in my head. I froze.
I’m back because you were in danger. But Cath told me the wing leader was with you.
I didn’t reply. Fear. Afraid of me?
Gods save me, I bonded an idiot. A short pang of joy flooded me. She was back. At least a tiny bit.
He cares. Cath told me.

I reached for Dain’s hand. His eyebrows furrowed immediately. His hand was warm, big, and soft even though it was a bit callused from dragon scales, weights and probably a few cuts. His eyes didn’t leave mine. I couldn’t tell what it was but I felt like I owed him. I slowly put his hand on my cheek. Dain’s mask faded and surprise rushed over his face. His eyes widened. I felt his hand starting to shake against my face as soon as what I was asking him to do sank in. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and nodded.
„I need words, Mairi“, he rasped, swallowing dryly.
„You don’t“, I huffed, watching him again. He looked away.
„I decided I need words a while ago“, he said. I always knew he could read memories without allowance. He didn’t need my go. But I also knew what happened with Varrish and how bad he felt towards Violet. Maybe he did change. I nodded.
„Please, look at the memory, Aetos“, I whispered. Shutting my eyes again.
„Eyes here“, he said. Almost inaudible, a faint whisper. I opened my eyes, looking into his. He didn’t need the words. He needed to see my eyes to know. He was beautiful. It hit me like a dragons foot square in the chest. His brown eyes were soft, gentle and kind. His beard was perfect stubble and there were little laughter lines in the corners of his eyes. My heart beat faster. Shit.
„Okay. Squeeze my hand if I should stop“, Dain said and closed his eyes. Something inside of me wanted to lean forward and just kiss him. Urgh.

I showed him what happened. How Caroline leaned over me and whispered into my ear.
„I will destroy every single one of you rebel misfits and if Aetos doesn’t get you killed or banished I will slid you open when you least expect it, Mairi“, her voice was sleek like honey and I felt the pain a heartbeat later when her dagger dug deep in between my muscles and tendons.
„One Mairi down, one to go“, she smiled, leaning back a bit, making it look like she had hugged me and we were just talking now. Anger burned in my eyes but I promised Dain to not fight. Well, I promised myself. My heart beat faster as my gaze slipped past her, looking at his broad back. Fucking beautiful detailed back. I felt a fire inside of me bubbling. Heat licking on my blood. Slowly it rose. Slowly it grew. Small at once, just a bit of force dripping through the doors to Thoirt’s power.
„Only one. To. Go“, she whispered into my her, pushing the dagger further into my leg. I winced, biting my lip so hard blood dripped into my mouth.
„Don’t be too loud, Mairi. What will Dain Aetos think? You making trouble again?“, she cooed. My leg hurt like hell and I felt blood seeping into my leathers.
„Pour little Aetos. Pretty man, so close yet so far. Killing your brother and now, looking so ridiculously handsome. How does it feel to-“, I cut the dialog in my memory. Concentrating on showing Dain what happened inside of me. Drip after drip magic seeped deeper and deeper through my clothes. What felt like blood was particles of a golden hue tugging at the edges of the cut, pressing against the blade. That’s when I realized it for the first time. I was grabbing her wrist. And I was using her own power to heal my wound simultaneously. I was siphoning her. While she was hurting me. I was draining her to mend myself.
Dain gasped and pulled back. Shock written all over his face.

„You can..“, he stuttered, brushing his hand through his hair.
„Drain people“, „Heal yourself“ we said at the same time. Our eyes met. He was searching for something in my eyes I obviously couldn’t give to him.
„Mairi“, he said kindly, squatting down in front of me again. Like a looped tape.
„Here, do it“, he said, holding his arm out. Confused I stared at it. When I didn’t react he put his palm on my thigh. Blood smearing over the skin.
„Do it, Mairi. Please. Take a little bit from me and heal your wound“, he encouraged me.
„I’m afraid“, I whispered. Closing my eyes.
„That’s okay. We’re all a little afraid sometimes“, he said and I nodded, not meeting his eyes.
„Okay“, I said. More to myself than to him. He gently squeezed my thigh and god, why did it feel so fucking good.
I opened the doors to Thoirt’s power, letting a tiny bit of wood smell, citrus, and Liam’s laugh in. With it came the heavy cent of pine, clean soap and a hint of whiskey. It blew into the living room in my mind with a gentle breeze. It settled around me. Wrapped around me like a cozy blanket.
„Good“, Dain’s voice was distant but spread calmness inside my mind.
„Take it“, he whispered closer to my face. I nodded and tried to let the power drip through me, into my wound.
„There you go“, he sighed happily and I felt relief washing over me as I felt the wound closing. Slowly but steady. Suddenly a thunder of thoughts met my mind. A scream. A female scream. Orange skin. No, not skin. Scales. I couldn’t breathe.
„Mairi“, Dain’s voice was distant again.
„MAIRI. Let go and come back“, he insisted.

You can do it, marke one. I nodded to myself and then I saw his face.
„It’s been my honor“, Liam whispered and closed his eyes.
„LIAM“, I yelled, opening my eyes, shaking.
„It’s okay, everything’s okay“, Dain said, grabbing my shoulders. I pushed him away, with way too much force. An „uff“ escaping his lips.
„I-I saw Liam, I..“, I jumped up walking to the furthest corner of my room.
„How did you do that?“, I asked. Anxiety thumping in my chest. Cold sweat ran down by back, spreading goosebumps everywhere.
„Do what?“
„I saw Liam. You showed me Liam“, I couldn’t breath. I gasped for air, my hands and arms ice cold.
„I-I don’t know what you’re talking about, Sl-“, „Leave“, I mumbled. Dain’s eyes switched from afraid to resigned in a heartbeat. He didn’t move but I saw the decision that he would forming behind his eyes.
„Mairi, breathe, everything is-“, „Please, leave, Aetos“, I whimpered, tears making my words heavy.
„Of course. I’m sorry“, he said, standing up. Before he reached the door he turned around, looking at me one last time. He opened his mouth but didn’t say anything. He just nodded once and was gone.

Chapter Text

Three hours later I stood on the flying field next to Thoirt. The rain cleared up but it was a cloudy night. My flight googles fogged up and I angrily brushed the steam away before pulling my backpack straps tighter.
„I KNEW IT“, a voice boomed across the damp grass. Of course.

Did you tell Cath?
I cannot hide very well, if you might have noticed. If someone from the swarm leaves, others might realize.

„Well, Aetos didn’t gave me an expected time for me to leave, so I decided now would be good“, I said, crossing my arms and turned around to Dain.
„You wanted to leave without me“, he said, packed up with backpack, flight jacket and hands curled into fists. His flying googles were pushed back into his light brown curls.
„Wow, great comprehension skills, Aetos. Now, please, let me go and go back inside. Daddy might be annoyed having to pick a new wing leader when you’re gone“, I hissed, reaching for Thoirt’s claw.
„I don’t care about him!“, he said, coming to a halt close to me.
„Well, maybe you should, at least you have a father“, I snapped, looking into his eyes. Hate sparkling in mine.
„Maybe be nice to what family you have left. They could be gone way sooner than you might expect“, I spat.

Where is this coming from? Thoirt asked.
Why do you care?

His face turned to stone.
„You will not fly alone“, he just said.
„Correct. Last time I checked I didn’t have wings so I will be with this very big, very dangerous dragon right in front of you, in case you missed it, now fuck off and leave me alone“, I said, turning back around but he grabbed my arm.
„Don’t touch me“, I said. I was afraid of his touch. I still hadn’t figured out what happened in the room a few hours ago, so I definitely wont let him touch me again.
„YOU. WILL. NOT. GO. ALONE. It’s an order“, he said, tightening his hand. I threw myself around, trying to get his hand off. Thoirt growled beside me. Dain’s hand slipped but he caught my other arm with my hand.
„Listen to me, Mairi, you-“, but he couldn’t finish the sentence because I twisted and hit him square in the face with my steel water bottle on my backpack. I froze, in shock. I didn’t wanted to do that.

Your self control is horrible, human.

„Well, I guess I deserved that“, he grumbled, looking up to me, holding his cheek.
„I told you not to touch me“, I hissed, pulling on my backpack straps.
„I need you to listen to me, just for one second“, Dain started.
„No, Aetos, I will not. I don’t have to. You’re not my wing leader anymore. I was banished, as you might remember. Even your small male brain should be able to comprehend that“. God, I hated myself.

Rightfully so.

Dain’s brown eyes stayed locked on me. Disappointment and confusion rolled over his face like waves.
„I am not the well mannered cadet you want me to be. And I’m really sorry about that. And I wont be able to hit our siphoning goals. I don’t know what you did and how you showed me Liam, but I don’t want you to ever fucking touch me again. If you do, I will fucking kill you“. My lower lip quivered as I said these words. Slowly Dain lowered his eyes and nodded.
„Maybe I’d deserve that as well“, he sighed and turned around.
„Weren’t you the one telling me to shut about wanting to die?“, I hissed. He stopped, his shoes making squishy sounds in the still wet grass.
„Because you don’t deserve it, Mairi“, Dain’s voice was flimsy, quiet.
„And you d-do?“, my voice broke when I asked that. My throat closed and breathing got hard.
„Do I? You tell me. I got your brother killed“, he huffed, but there was no fun or joy in his face. Silence fell above the field and we looked at each other. Tears dripped down my face and my jaw hurt from clenching it. Did he deserve it?

You know the answer.

„And I killed Violet’s mother“, I said, my voice wavering and I gasped for air. I was shaking now. Emotions rolling over me. Dain closed his hands to fists and hid them in his pockets. Then he dropped his eyes and nodded.
„Yes, but she made the decision to die. Not you“, he replied, still not looking up.
„And Liam decided to protect Violet“, I mumbled.
„And I feel fucking horrible for being thankful he did. Cause I love Violet“. A pang shot through my chest. With a thundering boom Cath landed behind me. I just knew it was him.

Interesting

„I had to let her go when Xaden won her heart. But she is save with him, well in his fucking kingdom - mostly“, he huffed. „Now she’s like a sister to me. And I hope one day our relationship can be normal again. She was a great friend. And I can’t wait for the day she trusts me again“, his eyes came up when he said these words.
„Liam died because people trusted me, Mairi“, he said. His voice thick.
„Every time I ask people to trust me I’m reminded what happened one time they actually did“. Dain walked over to Cath.
„And asking you, of all people, Sloane, is the hardest thing I do every single fucking day. Cause I just hope you can trust me. But I’m afraid you cannot. Like earlier. I don’t know what happened“, he grabbed the dragons leg.

Don’t you think this is a good moment to stop being cruel and tell him that you’re not even mad at him anymore regarding Liam?
If I do, there is nothing standing between us anymore.
And would that be bad?
He’s my wing leader, Thoirt laughed at my words.
Not anymore. Silence spread between us.
What are you afraid of, marked one?
Getting hurt.
We’re in a war, youngling. People will always get hurt.

„Well, then its better if you stay and I disappear. One thorn less in your side“, I said, climbing up Thoirt’s leg, sliding into the hollow on her back. Dain sighed.
„Yeah. Maybe you’re right“, he said. My head shot up.

Oh, my human is surprised when she’s right?
Shut it.

„But I don’t listen to what first years are telling me“, he said, a short glance over to me.

Did I already say that I like him?

I swallowed, looked away and held on to Thoirt.

Let’s go.
Where do you wanna go?  Thoirt asked.
Home, I replied.

Chapter Text

Dain

My legs were numb when when we landed in Aretia. It felt weird to be here when the other students were in Basgiath.

This will have consequences, Cath grumbled.
I’m well aware.

„Are you alright?“, I asked Sloane who was already off her dragon, scratching Thoirt on a sensible spot next to her nose. She purred happily. Sloane ignored me.
„How rude of me to ask you after a fucking long flight if you’re alright. How’s the cut?“, I tried again. She only shook her head.
„Leave me alone, Aetos. I’m still mad you’re here. I can watch out for myself. You can fly home now. Violet is here. Maybe some of the other idiots finally returned home. You’re not needed here“, she said. A pang shot through my chest.

Ouch.
Indeed.

„I will not leave“, I said and clapped Cath against his leg.

Thanks, buddy.
You’re welcome, human.
Go get some sheep.
Don’t tell me what to do.
Why is everybody so angry with me.
I just like riling you up.
So does she, I nod towards Sloane, who looks at me confused.
And you like it.
Fuck off. With a loud „thump“ I got sent into the mud as Cath pushed me over with his nose. Sloane’s eyes widened and for a second she seemed worried. Cath huffed.

Don’t speak to me like that, human.
Fair enough. I sighed, slumping my shoulders.

When I looked up, Sloane was still looking at me, but quickly turned away, leaning her forehead against Thoirt. Then she nodded and the dagger tail flew away, Cath following quickly. I sat up, my arms on my knees as I watch Sloane making her way into Riorson house. I was fucked.

___

„What the fuck are you doing here?“, Violet asked, sitting on the dinner table, Bodhi next to her. A few cadets were chatting on the table next to them. Violet stood up.
„Is everything alright? What happened?“, she walked around the table. Her brows furrowed and she reached for my face.
„What happened?“, she asked again and I was confused but remembered the water bottle hitting me.
„Oh, nothing just-“, „BODHI“, Sloane yelled behind me, running past us, jumping into the arms of the Tyrr.
„She did“, I sighed and Violet lowered her hand, looking at the blonde storm.
„You’re alive!“, Sloane stuttered, sniffling. Bodhi smiled widely, hugging her tight. I couldn’t hide the pang of jealously washing over me, so my eyes narrowed. But nobody saw it.

I felt it, Cath huffed.

„Sloane hit you?“, Violet hissed behind her hand.
„Something like that“, I sighed and ran my hand through my hair.
„I thought you were dead“, Sloane mumbled pulling back from Bodhi, grabbing his face in her hands. I clenched my fists. She leaned forward and kissed his cheek.
„There are fumes coming out of your ears“, Violet whispered and pushed her elbow between my rips. I winced and relaxed.
„Glad to see you’re fine, little one“, Bodhi laughed and ruffled Sloane’s hair. She turned around with a big smile which vanished when she saw me and Violet.
„Hey Sloane", Violet smiled. Sloane looked at her and nodded slowly.
„Okay, so why are you here?“, she asked and we sat down on the table. Sloane clearly didn’t wanted to stay but she did.
„Uhm, so, it’s a long story“, I started but Sloane interrupted me:“I got banished and this dumbfuck followed me“, she said, grabbing a piece of bread from Bodhi’s plate.
Violet stood up:“WHAT?“, she yelled.
„No long story, I guess“, I sighed. „Wait, dumbfuck?“, I asked, looking at Sloane. She glanced over to me, her eyes sparkling. I tiny bit of cheekiness hidden in them.
„He’s your wing leader, Mairi“, Violet said shocked.
„Not anymore“, Sloane said, crossing her arms leaning back in her chair. A small smile appeared on her face. It was an honest smile. The kind of smile you give your best friend when you skip class and the teachers find out, ground you, but at least you get grounded together and had a good day outside of class. I wanted to keep it. Grab it. Store it in my pocket.
„WHAT?“, Violet yelled, still leaned onto her hands on the table.
„I’m gonna tell you, Vi. Mairi needs rest“, I sighed.
„Shut up, Aetos“, she snapped. I rubbed the bridge of my nose. Bodhi looked between us with furrowed brows.
„Are they fucking?“, he asked Violet with a stage whisper. Violet raised her eyebrows and looked to me, then to Sloane. Then a big smile spread on her face.
„WHAT? NO!“, Sloane said a few heartbeats later, face twisted into a grimace. She made a throwing up sound. Anger built in my stomach. She was grossed out. Great.
„Fucking hell“, she said, pushing back from the table.
„You know what, I stay, you guys can talk. But please, don’t make assumptions about my sex life. Especially not with this huge dick“, she said, stumbling over her own words. She blushed furiously and I couldn’t hold back a smile and lifted one eyebrows.
„How’d you know, Mairi?“, I asked quickly, but she added „Huge idiot“, while I finished my sentence. Her mouth opened and closed without anything coming out. I tried to temper my smile when she looked away.
„Gross“, Violet said and coughed.
„I’m gonna leave“, Sloane whispered and passed us.
„Well, that’s interesting. Wanna tell me something, Dain?“, Violet cooed and sat back down.
„Well I actually do have a fucking lot to tell you“, I sighed, scratching my beard.

Sloane

We didn’t have a lot to do in Aretia, so I took over simple tasks like cooking and cleaning weapons. I was avoiding Dain as good as possible but we kept running into each other. He was making me absolutely furious. I still felt incredibly unsure about the night he sent me the picture of Liam. Or, to be more precise, when I received it. I had to admit that I didn’t knew if he sent it to me.
„Mairi“, his voice broke through the silence as I was sitting in the little library in the west wing.
„Hm?“, I asked, lifting my head.
„You’re going to train your signet“, he simply said, leaning against the doorframe with crossed arms.
„You fucking wish. I’m not letting you touch me, Aetos“, I hissed.
„You can call me Dain, if you want to“, he added, walking over to me, sitting down next to me.
„You wish“, I huffed. His brown eyes were wandering over my face, brushing over my lips, then back up to my eyes. Heat shot into my cheeks - and he realized, cause one of his brows twitched.
„Okay, whatever. You can continue hating me when I’m gone, I just need to tell you something. I don’t need to be insulted by you constantly“, Dain said, folding his hands on top of the desk.
„I am insulting you?“, I asked sharply, laughing an unhappy huff.
„Well, I can’t remember insulting you“, he snapped. He leaned back. His hands slowly gliding back from the wood. He already got a bit of tan even though we were only here for a few days. Freckles collected on his nose and cheeks - fuck why do I perceive shit like that.
„You treat me like a fucking child, Aetos. Stop looking after me. I’m fucking dangerous, you’re just dumb staying close to me“, I hissed. I did a lot of thinking lately. If I could not only drain people, but maybe even get their memories from them, I could be a horrible weapon. Pretending to heal, actually sucking memories and life out of people. I shook under the thought of that. Nausea creeping up my throat. I was a fucking monster.
„I treat you like I treat everyone I’m in charge off“.
„Well you’re not anymore. And you left your entire fucking wing alone in Basgiath to follow me. A walking death trap. Great work, Aetos“, I snapped, standing up. He remained seated. His eyes got a bit darker.
„Have you ever thought about why I do this bullshit, Mairi?“, he asked, leaning forward, forearms on the table. I spotted Jack handprints. They got a bit lighter. A weird feeling made my stomach clench.
„Cause you have a death wish? You made that clear a couple of times. And because you want to be hurt, I guess. Cause you think you deserve it“, I said, crossing my arms in front of my chest. God, I hated myself for being such a snappy idiot. But him being so close scared me.

Why? Thoirt asked.
Because everyone I ever let come close enough, died. The second the words flowed down the bond, they dawned on me.
There it is, Thoirt said. And a weird feeling of relief washed over me. Warmth settled in my stomach. I was afraid of loosing him.

„No, because I owe him“, Dain said, standing up. My mouth opened and I felt like someone splashed ice cold water into my face.
„Liam“, Dain said, turning around and started walking. „I owe Liam“, he said more quietly.
„Why did you come here?“, I asked, my voice tipped and I was raspy.
„To tell you Felix is training with you. Today at 5pm. You said clearly you don’t want to practice with me and I respect that“. He said, almost through the door.
„Dain“, I said, voice almost inaudible. He immediately stopped, but didn’t turn around. I sniffled as tears filled my eyes. My emotions were rolling over me. His hands clenched to fists on the side of his body and he hid them in his pockets.
„I don’t hate you“, I whispered. My heart thundered in my chest as hot tears streamed down my cheeks.

There you go. Was that so hard?

Dain nodded, then left the room.

______

Felix stared at me while I sat across from him on the grass. We went outside for the training to keep the mind clear. Well, my mind was anything but clear, but nice try I guess. I watched two dragons flying across the house, drifting off into the valley, probably to hunt some sheep.

Focus, marked one

„And what’s the real reason?“, Felix asked and I looked up, realizing I got lost in the thought.
„For what?“, I asked sheepishly. He sighed, starting to pick on some pieces of grass.

„Why are you so afraid to loose control“, he asked. I froze.
„I’m not afraid to loose control“
„Spare me the bullshit“, I winced at the harsh words from him. He was, after all, my trainer and not my friend or buddy.
„Did you loose control when you siphoned Sorrengail?“. His blunt question made my stomach drop.
I huffed. „Well, I killed her. Does this answer your question?“.
„You know, even killing is about intention“, Felix leaned back onto his hands, lifting his face up to the sky.
„What was your intention?“. His question left me speechless.
„What?“
„Your intention. When you said yes to Violet, why did you do it?“
„For the greater good, I guess?“, my stomach was rumbling, did I eat enough today?
„No, the intention“, Felix pushed.
„To save people“, I admitted and he nodded, happy with my words.
„So, was it killing?“
„Yes, but-“, „There we go“, Felix sat up and turned around.
„It’s not that simple“, I snapped, standing up myself. Felix chuckled.
„I never said it was, but telling yourself the truth is the first step to peace“, he said, walking down the hill.

„Wait, we only just started“, I ran after him, my lungs already burning cause the session was exhausting, even just the beginning.
„Oh, I’m well aware of that“, he reached the court of Riorson house and told me to wait outside.
Dain came out of the house, carrying a few pieces of wood and an axe.
„Having to chop wood when we have dragons is kinda dumb isn’t it, Mairi?“, he sighed when his eyes caught me. I let a small smile slip. Shit, he actually wasn’t just annoying.
„Good luck getting Cath into the living room you idiot“, I snapped, but kept the smile. He smiled as well and shook his head. Damn, this smile was beautiful. I hadn’t seen it in a while. He never really smiled at me. We never had this connection. Suddenly I realized how sad it made me that we never did. After all, Dain was nice.

And hot
Oh come on, I snapped at Thoirt.

But she was right. Fear rushed through my veins out of nowhere.
He’s gonna get hurt. Everyone around me does.
Don’t be ridiculous.
Leave.
No.
I said leave. My heart was racing.
Marked one, don’t cut me off.
Don’t tell me what to do.

The mask slipped onto my face. Something inside of me got hard.
„Okay, let’s go Mairi, we’re gonna kill a cat“, Felix said like we were off to a really exciting task while stepping out of the front door, holding a small orange cat.
„What?“, said Dain and I at the same time. Felix smiled widely.
„Let’s have some fun“, he put the cat into my arms and pulled me from the courtyard.
„Is this …“, I asked.
„Drake’s cat. It’s name is Broccoli“, Felix said while I stumbled after him onto the grass.
„Hold on“, I stopped. The cat purred in my arm, hiding under my armpit.
„I’m not gonna kill a fucking cat“, I said. Felix stopped and turned around.
„I know you’re not. So you will siphon from him“, he stemmed his hands into his hips and smiled.
„I will not siphon from a cat“, I said, holding Broccoli in front of me. Gods, he was cute. Wait, was he a he? I lifted the cat up, looking for its genitals - yep, a he.
„Why? You’re not gonna kill it, so why not do it? You can give him the power back immediately“. Felix kept smiling. I was too confused and my head felt mushy.

Get Aetos here, I whispered to Thoirt.
I’m sorry, am I a pidgeon?
No, but when you tell Cath he’ll be here in seconds and I don’t have to look for him
Oh, so you’re going to exploit his anxiety?
No, I’m gonna .. yes. Get him here.

Felix crocked his head and I gave him a smile while I sat down and started petting Broccoli. Two minutes later footsteps thumbed over the grass.
„Mairi“, Dain said in his wing leader voice. He sounded a bit out of breath.
„Are you alright?“, he came to a halt next to me, looking at Felix and me sitting in the grass.
„Perfekt. Please, bring Broccoli back to Drake“, I said, handing him the cat. With confusion written on his face he took the tiny baby. He gently pushed it against his chest, cooing something into its fur and giving it a small kiss while petting it. Heat fluttered in my stomach.

Don’t say anything, I shot toward Thoirt.
It is cute.
Grrrrrr

It was cute. Dang cute to be fair. My cheeks warmed and when our eyes met I looked away. I will not, absolutely not, start flirting with Dain Aetos.
„Thanks Aetos, you can leave now“, I said and he furrowed his brows but nodded and left with the little fur ball.
„So, what's the lesson? That I wont kill helpless animals?“, I sigh and lay down in the grass. Felix sighed as well.
„Try again“, he said.
„That small kitten are ridiculously cute?“
„Again“
„I will not kill“, I sighed. Maybe one day I would believe myself.
„And why?“, Felix poked.
„Because it’s wrong“
„No. Because you’re way too afraid of it for it to actually happen“, Felix said. I sat up. Looking at him.
„I don’t know if someone has ever told you, Sloan, but you’re a good human. A very good human. You went through hell and back. Saved lives, took lives. But you’re good. Strong and good. And you’re lovable, kind, fierce and talented“, he said. His words hit me like punches to the gut. I swallowed but the lump in my throat wouldn’t vanish.
„I took a life“, I repeated him.
„You didn’t make the decision to kill, Sloane“. Felix looked into my eyes and I counted the strands of hair in his silver-ish beard.
„You made the decision to help“, he said. My hands got cold. Sweat dripped down my back, sending a shiver through my body.
„Help does sometimes mean not everyone survives“, his words where hard.
„But you’re not alone in this“, he said, reaching for my hand. I let it happen.
„And if you refuse to siphon, you will do nothing. But if you decide to, you can help others. It’s your decision“, he said. His thumb gently brushed my hand. A calming, soothing action.

„Let us help you. I trust you to not hurt me intentional. I have the power to withdraw at all times. And you do too. You have the control. And I do too“, Felix said. I hadn’t with Dain. When I burned him.

You did. He trusted you enough to let you hurt him.
Dumb idiot.
Still wanting you to succeed. Trust needs two people. The one needing it and the one giving it.

„I’m aware of unintentional mistakes and I am ready to take the risk. Cause I’m on your side, Sloane. And I trust you“, Felix added when I didn’t answer. I slowly nodded.
„It will take time. And mistakes will happen. And your fear wont be gone immediately. But remember, you are not alone“, he repeated. I needed these words.
„Thank you, Felix“, he nodded as a thanks and withdrew his hand.
„We will continue now“, he said and I shook my head.
„I’m tired, really, I just want to-“, „That was a command from your teacher, not a wish“. His voice strong and I winced. I hated authority. I just nodded and when he held his arms out I hesitantly put my palms onto them.
„Take a quarter of my power. Let it sit inside you and then give it back“, Felix said quietly. I nodded again, closing my eyes, opening the door to Thoirt’s power.

I’m with you, marked one. She whispered.

I let the sent of my home sink deeper and deeper into my cells. I heard the wood crackling in the fireplace, heard mum and Liam talk in the kitchen. He laughed. She laughed. The power in me grew until I took a deep breath and started to pull on Felix power. Gently, letting it flow into me. There wasn’t a tug, it was smooth sailing. I stumbled when I started thinking about how I knew it would be a quarter of his power. My stomach tightened and Liam went quiet. I smelled nothing. My power felt rough, the flow starting to tug.
„Stay calm, we can back out any time“, Felix said. And I tried to focus on the moment. The flow started rippling but the tug calmed down.
„Just like that“, Felix whispered.

You’re doing great.

„Now, give it back“, Felix said softly. I nodded. The current turned around and I felt it dripping into the other direction. The flow smooth. I breathed in the citrus and the lavender. Then I stumbled again.
„It’s okay, that’s part of the process“, Felix voice seemed farther away. I heard laughing. But it wasn’t Liam. It was a way younger voice.
„Sloane“, Felix said softly. A whiff of fresh cut grass crossed my powers. Than a deep, stinging smell hit my nose and I started coughing.
„Sloane!“, the voice sharper, closer to me.

Human. Thoirt whispered.
I can’t. I said. My entire body shook. Cold sweat dripping down my forehead.

„Dad!“, the younger voice yelled. It sounded happy, excited. The smell got worse. Melting metal. Gunpowder, something burned. „Dad?“, the voice asked again.
„SLOANE!“, Felix voice boomed in my head. My body was on fire as I tried to keep the flow steady but it was flowing too fast, I was loosing power. My own power.
„DAD!“, the voice yelled. No, it cried.
„ENOUGH!“, Felix yelled and a heartbeat later my eyes opened itself and I gasped for air.
„It’s okay. Everything is fine!“, Felix said, grabbing my upper arms. „Breathe, Sloane!“. I continued gasping, coughing, but I couldn’t breath. I grabbed my throat.

Marked one. Thoirt rumbled. 

„BREATHE“, Felix yelled and then, I did.

Chapter Text

Sloane

Dain’s hands were shaking. His face was pale. A grimace laid upon it.
„Keep going“, he whispered. His voice toneless. I shook my head. My entire body buzzing as the power flowed through me.
„Dain, you’re…“, I gasped, seeing how his cheeks lost its color.
„I’m fine. You have to keep going, otherwise she dies!“, he said. His voice surprisingly calm.
„Sh-she?“, I stuttered. Dain nodded over to his right. General Sorrengail was sitting on the floor in a bloodbath. Violet was standing behind her with wide eyes. Tears running down her cheek. She was frozen, not moving, just crying silently.
„And she will too“, Dain said and nodded to his left. Mira was laying on the floor, barely breathing, blood gushing from her throat.
„As long as you don’t keep the power, everything is fine“, Dain whispered. He sounded weird. Almost manic.
„Keep going, Sloane“, my name sounded weird from his lips but the panic in my head covered the confusion. People were dying. I needed Dain’s power.

Imagine what you could do with that power, Thoirt whispered.
Save people.
Revenge. I shuddered at her words.
I don’t want to revenge. I whispered.
You do. You can take his life and save two people at once, isn’t that a deal? But didn't she say she would never support me murdering someone?

My body was so hot, I felt like the sweat on my skin was evaporating. I was steaming. The rush in my ears was so loud.
„Sloane“, General Sorrengail pleaded. Blood dripped from her lips. Why was there blood? 
„Please. I don’t want to die“, she whispere, begging and her eyes broke me. They were so full with emotions, with fear.
„Keep going. It’s okay, I trust you“, Dain whispered. I looked back to him, his eyes light. Too light. His lips seemed pale. A smile splitting his lips. 
„D-dain, I'm draining you“, I said toneless but he just smiled. „It’s okay, Love. I deserve this“. Tears collected in his eyes and blood started dripping from his nose. 
„Shut up“, fury flushed my cheeks and anger tightened the knot in my stomach.
„I deserve this, Sloane. It’s my fault. It’s only fair“, he stuttered, words heavy. I tried to move my hands but he held them. They weren’t laying on Jack’s handprints on his forearms, I was simply holding his hands. And he wouldn’t let go.
„Dain, let go, please“, I stuttered, pulling. 

Can you feel it? Thoirt's voice was deep, growling. Terrifying. 
It’s wrong.
It’s fair. I shuddered. 

„It’s okay“, he whispered, his eyes fluttering. I felt nausea rising with the bile. My heart was beating so fast and so loud I almost couldn’t hear his words.

Thoirt stop it. Take my power.
You are the power, marked one.

„Dain“, I said again. He nodded and slowly his hands relaxed and let go of mine.
„DAIN!“, I yelled, grabbing his face. „FUCK, DAIN!“, my voice toppled over. His eyes were closed, his head lolled heavy in my hands as his body slacked and I tumbled forwards with him. I knelled above him, shaking him. My chest hurt and I kept screaming his name. Tears ran down my face and I sniffed loudly. I hadn't even kissed him. Hadn't told him that he was making me furious, and my heart racing and..

Use the power, marked one! Thoirt’s voice thundered.
I KILLED HIM
HE DESERVED IT, HUMAN

„Sloane“, General Sorrengail whispered and I looked up, Dain’s lifeless body in my hands.
„Give me his power. Don’t let it go to waste“. To waste. Dain DIED.
„I-I don’t know w-what do“, I said, slinging my arms around Dain’s neck, pulling him to my chest. He was so, so heavy. And still warm. His smell contaminating my nose. My heart so damn heavy. 
„I need to give it back!“, I yelled, another sob shaking me. „I need him back. I-I cannot.. I didn’t wanted to“, I mumbled, pressing my nose into his hair.

Let him go. He’s the reason your brother is dead. Feel the power, human. Let it flow through you.
A wave of hate rushed through me. Not my hate - Thoirt’s.
I looked around.
„No, I whispered. She is“, I was blinded by the anger.
„Sloane, help me. Don’t let me die!“, General Sorrengail yelled. Mira sobbed and coughed. My head was spinning, everything hurt, I was exhausted and still felt Dain’s power rush through my body. So much power. In one human. He shouldn’t have this much power. He was gone. Slowly I dropped him and stood up.
„Good. SAVE US, SLOANE!“, General Sorrengail spat. Anger dripping from her lips like blood. Or, to be fair, together with blood.
„Save me. You worthless, stubborn child“, she hissed. But I walked past her. My gaze focused on Violet.
„Sloane“, she whispered. My veins burned. Hot sizzling power. The edges of my view turning slightly red. Red, just like Dain’s dragon. And mine.

Kill her. You owe it to Liam. Take her power as well.

„Listen to me, I know this will sound crazy, but this, right here is not real, it's-“, but I didn’t let her finish and pulled my dagger, jumping at her.

Dain

„DAIN!“, a voice yelled and I tried to open my heavy eyes.
„Hm?“, I grumbled, trying to see in the dark.

WAKE UP, Cath yelled. I immediately sat up straight.

„DAIN!“, Violet yelled again, shaking me, pulling on my collar.

The marked one needs help.
Get Bodhi. If she needed help, she needed the closest thing to family available.

I was at my feet immediately.

Cuir said his rider is already with her.

Thank god.
„What’s wrong?“, I asked Violet. Her eyes were blown open wide and her hair was tussled.
„Sloane, she, she, she“, she gasped, but I pushed past her, grabbing her arm and pulling her after me.
„She had a nightmare. I was it. I-I-I walked in and she, she, she“, Violet stuttered.
„WHAT VIOLET. TALK TO ME!“, I yelled, stopping and grabbing her arm. My ears were ringing.
„I was watching her. I walked in..“, Violet seemed so afraid, so anxious. Then I realized the tears and the scratches on her face. Three long stripes across her cheek. Her cheek bone was red.
„I-In on the dream then I woke up, went to her room to wake her up but she attacked me“, she said.
She attacked Violet?
„It’s gonna be fine, Vi. Did she hurt you badly?“, I felt a pang of guilt shooting through my chest cause I did not ask her that in the first place. My hand brushed over her cheek and I pulled her quickly to my chest. 
„I’m fine. It’s not her attacking me, that, that made me upset, it’s-“, the door to her room flew open. Bodhi stood in it and quickly closed the door. His shirt was ripped. He looked at us shocked but immediately relief washed over his face.
„She’s crying your name, she wont wake up“, he said toneless, swallowing deeply. „I-I don’t know whats wrong with her“, his voice was strained, he was afraid.
„She has a dagger under her pillow“, Bodhi said and I slowly nodded.
Then I understood. He told me because he expected me to go in. Me. She attacked Violet. Is caught up in a nightmare. Attacked Bodhi. And she is crying my name. Cold showers washed over my body. Vi and Bodhi looked at me expectantly. 

Thoirt cannot reach her, Cath said. My heart raced in my chest.

„T-tell me when I should come in“, Violet whispered and I saw a conduit dangling from her arm. She was readying herself to defend me in case Sloane would attack me. Bodhi’s eyes jumped from Violet to me, narrowing.
„We will not hurt her“, I whispered. Bodhi saw the daughter of the woman who killed his family and the son who’s father gave the command which lead to the death of his long time friend in front of him. I swallowed. But he nodded.
„I trust you. But I will tear you into shreds, if you hurt her, Aetos“, he whispered. I nodded. I turned around and opened the door.

Chapter Text

Sloane’s room was dark, only a bit of light moon light shining through the windows.
„I will kill you“, a soft whisper came from her bed. Sheets were rustling and my breath was going faster.
Quickly I stepped over to her bed. She was drenched in sweat. Sheets crumbled around her, half her body out in the cold, only wearing a sleeping gown, sticking to her damp skin. Her hair was tussled and tears streamed down her face.
„He is dead because of you“, she said. Fear in her voice, mixed with devastation. My breath got faster. He was. Liam was dead because of me.
„Mairi“, I whispered. She sobbed, her hands and arms shaking. Eyes closed, head rolling from left to right. Every now and then her legs started to thresh against the sheets and relax entirely again.
I reached under her pillow, finding the blade Bodhi mentioned and quickly pulled it out and threw it to the floor. I held my breath the entire time.
„Mairi“, I said a bit louder. She sobbed again.
„I can still hear him. His voice“, the pain in her voice made my heart hurt. She missed Liam.
„Dain“, she whispered softly and sobbed. Softly. Softly?
„It’s just a dream“, I said, grabbing her shaking hand. If she would attack me, I could pin her down. Well, Bodhi should’ve been able to as well. Immediately she pulled on the hand and started threshing.
„He trusted me“, she whispered. What did she mean?
„And I killed him. You let me drain him, Violet“, her voice broke.

She means you, human.

It rattled me. Flipped my stomach. She wasn’t talking about Liam. She was talking about me. She didn’t wanted to kill me. She killed me in her dream.
„Mairi“, I said softly, standing up from my knees and sitting down on her mattress. The girl in front of me wouldn’t hurt me. Gods, she could never. She sobbed and sniffled.
„Mairi, hey. It’s me, wake up. Please“, I whispered and cupped her face.
„Come back to me, Sloane“, I said. „Open your eyes, it’s just a nightmare“. Her skin was burning under my hands. She felt so small, so fragile. And she was suffering. My thumbs brushed over her wet cheeks and I felt the lump in my throat. Heavy.
„Open your beautiful blue eyes for me, Sloane“, I said, my thumbs brushing her tears away again as they kept coming.
„Dain“, she breathed and froze in motion.
„I’m here“, I replied. Her eyes fluttered open. Bloodshot red, but blue. Sparkling, dark blue. Not the usual sky blue. Her eyes were tinted with fear and panic.
„D-dain“, she stuttered, eyes trying to focus. God, my name never sounded better.
„Yeah, I’m here, Mairi“, I repeated, attempting to smile.

Tell Tairn she’s okay. And Thoirt.
Thoirt said she could feel her again.
Good. Thank you Cath.
You did good, human.

„Welcome back, idiot“, I smiled. She just looked at me in disbelieve. Then she dashed forward, throwing her arms around my neck. My heart jumped and for a heartbeat I was frozen, then I did what I wanted to do for so fucking long. I wrapped my arms around her and held her close. She felt so fucking good. She was made for me.
„It’s okay. I’m here“. I murmured the words like affirmations.
„I killed you“, she whispered. And sobbed loudly.
„You did not“, I replied. She shook her head and tears drenched my shirt. My hand brushed over her back like the strokes would assure her even more I was here with her.
„I k-killed you. You were dead. D-dead. I-I held your body. Y-you were dead. I drained you. I felt the l-life leaving you. I-I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry“, she rambled and I squeezed her tighter.
„It was a dream. It was all a dream. I’m here. I’m alive. I’m here. And I wont leave you“, I muttered, digging my hand into her hair to support her even better but she kept shaking.
„D-dain“, Sloane’s entire body was hot, burning hot.
„Sloane, breath, you need to calm down“, I said, trying to pull away but she was cramping around my neck.
„Slo, hey“, I said again, but she froze entirely. She wasn’t breathing.
„SLOANE“, I said, pulling her off me, looking into her eyes. Her mouth was moving, like a fish but her chest wasn’t rising.
„Breathe“, I cupped her face. She shook her head.
„C-can’t“, she gasped. Fear mirrored in her eyes. Maybe mine.
„You’re having a panic attack. It’s gonna get better soon, okay? But you have to breathe“, I said, shaking her gently. She gasped. I bit of air entering her lungs. But not enough. Her eyes unfocused.
„Fuck, Sloane“, I muttered, sliding off the bed and picking her up.

Sloane

I couldn’t hear what he was saying. Everything was muffled. Everything was unfocused. I couldn’t breathe. I lived without air now.

You do not

Every now and then a bit of air came through but my airways seemed closed off. My body was burning hot. I was in flames.

You’re not.

„Sloane, please, breathe“, Dain whispered. I killed him. I drained him. I felt his life leaving my body. Another wave of panic crushing into me. I was dying. This is what dying felt like. The greatest terror possible. I only realized Dain lifted me up when we were already in the bathroom and he set me down onto the cold floor tiles. Everything hurt. My body was shaking.
„You got this, Mairi. Everything is okay. I’m with you“, Dain said. I stared in his beautiful brown eyes. I killed him.

You did not.

I did.

If you did, I would’ve left you.

A big gulp of air crashed into my lungs.

I would never support an unmorally rider. This is why I picked you.

The world was spinning. Dain was saying something but the blood was rushing too fast in my ears. I only saw his lips moving, then I did not anymore cause my eyes fluttered close. Pain in my chest. My hands, no, I couldn’t feel them. These were hands of a murderer.

These are hands of a savior.

„I’m with you“, Dain whispered. I couldn’t see him anymore when I opened my eyes. He was gone. But I felt him. His warmth was still engulfing me. What was left of him.

He’s standing behind you, human. Thoirt growled and before I could realize her words the punch hit me in the face.

I gasped loudly, coughing up water. Ice cold tendrils of water wrapped around me. It was everywhere. My entire body turned cold in a matter of seconds. I gasped for air. Beautiful, fresh, crisp air entering my system, flooding my lungs. It felt like the first day of spring. My eyes focused.
„SHIT!“, I yelled against the water splashing into my face. I felt my body coming alive again. My heart beating, fluttering, fast, but wasting away the adrenaline. I started shaking again. The sudden burst of cold sending my body into shock. Panic, anxiety and shock battled in my chest. One numbing the other. I coughed and gasped at the same time.
„Keep breathing, Slo“, Dain said, a hand carefully brushing through my hair.
„It’s okay, it’s gonna help“. His other hand was splayed on my hip, holding me steady. My legs felt wobbly and just before they could give in, Dain’s arms where wrapped around me.
„I got you“, he said into my ear. He did. He got me. Fuck. The water kept pouring down. Slowly washing away my sweat and fear. I forced myself to breathe. Forgetting it every now and then, but Dain gently brushed my stomach with his thumb, every time I did. The warmth of his hands felt like red markers on a heat detector - and the rest of my body was blue.
„You’re doing great“, he whispered and I felt his breath on my crown. Then I realized it and turned around. He was wet. Entirely wet. Cause he was in here with me. Dain fucking Aetos was standing under an ice cold shower with me because I was having a panic attack.

Told you I like him.

Wet curls stuck to his forehead. His damn sculpted body visible through his wet, white sleep shirt. Thank god he was wearing pants. And they weren’t white. Then it hit me. I looked down my body. I was wearing a night gown. A light one. But his eyes didn’t dip. They stayed on mine. His hands still on my sides, as I just turned around inside his arms.
„Better?“, he asked, water droplets dripping from his nose. His hand came up and gently brushed a strand of hair out of my face. A tear ran down my cheek. Relief washed over me. I sniffed. He caught the tear with his thumb. His eyes were infinitely warm and the little line between his brows was getting less visible with my slow breathing returning. He searched my face. No jokes, no dumb words, nothing. Just … worry.
„It’s okay. It’s a lot. You’re not alone“, he just mumbled and pulled me against his chest. His warmth radiating through the wet shirt. I sobbed. The exhaustion hitting me like a truck. He held onto me like I would melt into the floor if he didn’t. My nose pressed agains his neck.
„I’m here“, he whispered, his hand slowly running up and down my back. God, I needed that hug. He felt so good.
„I got you“, Dain moved his hand and the water stopped. Silence filling the room „I’ll always have you, Sloane“. With a sniff I nodded, grabbing him harder, feeling his strong back under my palms. My fingertips sinking into the clothed skin. Dain pulled a bit back, looking into my eyes again.
„Let’s get you back to bed, okay?“, he said, leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. When I blushed he smiled a small smile and my heart fluttered. He reached for my hand and pulled me out of the bedroom. We left wet splotches on the rooms floor. For a second Dain hesitated, looked to the door, then to me. For a heartbeat his gaze dipped, like he lost control over his eyes. He looked away immediately, blushing. So did I. I was so fucked.

Hopefully.
Gods, Thoirt.

Dain cleared his throat.
„Good night, Mairi“, he said. It was ridiculous. He was dripping wet, shirt clinging to his fucking beautiful, strong body, standing in his pajamas in my room. Blushed cheeks, and his pants. Nope, I forced my eyes up again. It didn’t matter if they were straining or not. He turned around. Fucking gentleman. Showering with me and then leaving.
„Aetos“, I sighed. He hesitated and sighed too.
„Good night“, he grabbed the handle to open the door. His butt was incredible. The wet pants hugging it.
„Dain“, I said. My voice broke. I swallowed. Everything was okay. He was alive. I didn’t kill him. I was not a murderer. He immediately turned around.
„I don’t want to be alone tonight“, I said. My voice completely strained. My heart was thundering in my chest. But not because of lust, because of fear. And he sensed it. His gaze softened.
„I need to pick up fresh-“, „I have boxers of Liam“, I replied way too quickly. I usually wore them for sleeping or over my underwear on cold winter days. Slowly he nodded, padding over to my armoire.
„Top drawer. Can you hand me a fresh gown, too, please“, I said quietly. My face, my neck, everything was flushed. While he was looking in the armoire, and in my underwear drawer, which I suddenly became well aware off, I grabbed two towels from the wardrobe, throwing one after him. It landed on his head, and he slowly turned around, the towel falling from his head. I bit my lip but started to smile. For a heartbeat he kept the straight face, then he smiled too.
„Glad I got you back“, he whispered, almost to himself, but I heard it. He dried off his hair and I did the same, watching him, still unsure if he was, indeed, alive. Then he pulled his sticky, wet shirt off. My eyes widened. Dain Aetos was taking his fucking clothes off in my room. Heat rushed into my face.
„If you want to keep looking, you would be next. Gotta stay fair“, he said and slowly turned towards me. I looked at his chest. Ridges over ridges, strong, tight muscles. The tail of a dark red dragon dipping over his shoulder. His chest was chiseled with a few brown hairs peppered over it. A dark path of hair coming from his belly button disappearing in his very, fucking, wet pants. I was blushing furiously but grabbed the hem of my gown and pulled it up. Not sure if I was joking or not.
„Gods, Mairi“, Dain growled and immediately turned away. My heart stuttered. He turned away.

Urgh, I like him too much. I’m starting to hate him, Thoirt grumbled.
Yeah, I just sighed.
Now, leave, please. I mumbled to her. I felt her pulling out of my head.

I did the same and turned around, pulling the wet gown over my head. I didn’t know if he was looking but somehow I knew he wouldn’t. A piece of clothing landed on the floor next to me and when I looked over my shoulder I saw him still faced away, pulling one of Liam’s boxers briefs over his butt cheek. I picked up the gown and quickly pulled it over.
„The horror show is over, you can turn around again“, I snickered and dried off my hair completely. Dain turned around, shyly looking up.
„Thank gods“, he growled, reaching for my towel to hang them onto the hangers in the bathroom.
„Sorry for the jumpscare“, I said, unsure if I was joking or not. His eyes searched my face. Soft, gentle, wandering over my eyes, my nose, cheeks, lips.
We stood across from each other, in silence.
„Sloane“, he started, coming one step closer.
„Maybe you’re right. You should leave“, I said, backing away half a step. He immediately stopped.
„Don’t push me away. Please“, his voice so fucking sad. „I don’t know how many times more I will be able to take it“, he said slowly. My mouth fell open. The entire mood shifted. He was honest. His words hit me with delay.
I said nothing, too stubborn. As always. But Dain didn’t leave. I was staring at the floor when I saw his feet stepping into my field of view.
„I know I don’t deserve-“, „Stop it, Dain“, I said clearly. His eyebrows jumped up in surprise.
„I drained you in my dreams tonight. I saw the life slipping out of you. And not a single fucking second I felt relieved, or happy. It was pure terror. Seeing you die“, I shook my head, trying to hold on to his gaze.
„And that scares me. Because that means I like you. That means I let you close enough to make me feel things besides apathy. And as soon as I let people in here“, I tapped onto my heart, „They fucking die“, my voice broke. „And that’s terrifying“.
„Bodhi is still alive, Imgon, Garrick .. Broccoli is too“, he said. I wanted to smile.
„And I’m shitting my fucking pants of them passing every single day“, I whispered. Dain slowly shook his head.
„You’re not wearing pants, Mairi. Stop lying“. I shot daggers at him with my eyes.
„If you want me to leave, I’ll leave“, he said simply, honestly.
„If you ask me to stay, I will stay. I will go where you want me too“. My heart fluttered. His soft brown eyes held mine.
„Dain“, I started and he sighed, licking his lips, dropping his eyes. Gosh, he was so beautiful. His stubbled beard a bit longer than this morning. I saw the scar peaking through the hairs on his chin. His lashes were unfairly long. His lips full, a tiny bruise on the edge of them. Probably from sparring.
„I’m not mad at you anymore“, I said. Confused he looked up.
„For what? Pushing you into a cold shower?“
„I don’t blame you“, I said, keeping my straight face. Dain’s eyes got even more confused.
„Liam’s death wasn’t your fault. I forgave you months ago. I never had the guts to tell you, because I was afraid it would let you come closer to me than I was comfortable with. I understand in what kind of a situation you were and I should’ve never blamed any of you in the first place. But it was hard. Still, doesn’t justify burning you with hatred and calling you the reason my brother died“, I swallowed hardly.
„You never did“, he said quickly.
„What?“, now I was confused.
„Said I was the reason. Never“, he whispered. He was right.
„And even if you felt like it sometimes, you never told me. And do you know why?“, he asked, coming one step closer, now standing right in front of me. I felt his heat on my skin.
„Why?“, I asked toneless.
„Cause you’re a fucking good person, Sloane. Just like your brother“. He took a deep breath. My heart was beating fast. Silence fell upon us and somehow we drifted closer. I felt his warmth radiating towards me, pulling me into his atmosphere.
„Stay“, I whispered, putting my palm on his chest. His heart was racing under my hand. Warm skin, trained pec. Soft hair. „Please“, I added. A small smile grew on his face and his free hand cupped my face. I wasn’t afraid that he might read my memory. I trusted him. Shit, I really did. Slowly his eyes wandered over my face.
„Okay“, his head dipped and he kissed my forehead again. His lips stayed there for a heartbeat. Then two. Oh fuck.
I pulled back, catching his eyes. They jumped to my lips. Quickly. Then he blushed and swallowed. Dain fucking Aetos was nervous? Because of me?
I pushed onto my tiptoes and touched my nose to his. His hand caught my side, keeping me on my tiptoes, drawn close to him. His smell gathered around me like a warm hug. Pine, clean soap. We closed our eyes as he pulled me closer towards him. My chest hitting his. Our stomachs melting into each other. Warm. So warm.
„Sloane“, he sighed quietly.
„Is this okay?“, he rasped, his lips almost brushing mine. I nodded and smiled. Gently, his nose brushed along mine. Then his lips found mine as my arms wrapped around his neck.
Dain Aetos was a soft kisser. Fucking soft. No haste. Slow, gentle lips. So warm, so soft, so beautiful. My fingers got lost in his damp hair and one of his hands slowly dipping over my lower back onto my butt. Thumb brushing as he nipped on my lips. Heat rushed through my body. Like electricity traveling through my veins. He pulled my waist close to his. The warmth of his crotch beamed through the thin fabrics between us. I felt him harden. After two more, careful kisses he pulled back. Our eyes opened lazily and we looked into each other eyes. Cheeks flushed, lips pinks.
„You need to rest“, he muttered, brushing a strand of hair back, before placing another soft kiss on my forehead. Right on cue a yawn escaped my mouth. He smiled. At me. And I love it.

Chapter Text

Dain

She climbed into bed and my eyes couldn’t help but look at her backside. I noticed a few seconds earlier that she wasn’t wearing underwear - I hadn't handed her some. And her skin was so soft, even through her silky night gown. She felt so fucking good. But I wasn’t feeling lust raging in my veins. I just felt relieved. She was okay. Doing better. Still, my, well, Liam’s, boxers strained under my hard on.
Sloane turned around, looking for me.
„You coming?“, she asked and my heart melted. Yes, I would always come into your bed, Sloane Mairi. Whenever she’d ask me, I’d be there. Her eyes dipped to my crotch and remained there for a heartbeat. She opened her mouth like she wanted to say something but closed it again. I wouldn’t sleep with her. Not tonight. And I hoped she knew it. Her cheeks where pink when I slid into bed next to her.
I turned towards her, taking her in. She was facing the same way and her eyes did the same, looking over my face. Gently she put a hand on my cheek. Like on command my eyes fell shut. Gods, her touch felt so fucking good. It felt like coming home. I turned my head, pressing my lips into her palm and breathing in her scent.
„Dain?“, she asked. Her eyes were heavy, but her thumb kept brushing over my beard.
„Hm?“, I groaned, taking a deep breath. She swallowed. Her eyes were turning glassy again. She shed enough tears tonight.
„Don’t cry“, I mumbled, cupping her face this time.
„Read it“, she said and I furrowed my brows, then I understood.
„It doesn’t matter“, I said and tried to pull my hand back, but she grabbed it and doing the same thing I did, kissing my palm.
„Please“, her voice was so small. I raked my head for reasons not do it, but then I gave in.
„Okay“, I nodded and closed my eyes.
Her memories of the dream were splotchy and chaotic, but there was so much happening. So much blood, tears and I saw her looking at me through her own eyes. I felt her pain. The way she remembered it. And it scared me. Then she looked up, seeing Violet and she turned feral. Screaming at her, that she killed me because of her. Because of her family. That another person she liked had to die because of the Sorrengails.
„I don’t hate her“, Sloane mumbled when I withdraw from her memory. I’d seen enough.
„I know. That’s what nightmares do. Show us what we never want to become“, I said. Carefully I pushed my head towards hers. Her big eyes looking at me.
„Thank you for showing me, Slo“, I said, kissing the tip of her nose. She nodded, a slight blush covering her cheeks. She looked so incredible tired it broke my heart.
„You gotta sleep now“
„Don’t tell me what to do“, I laughed at her words.
„You’re not my wing leader anymore“, she added with a smile herself and my heart got lighter.
„Thank gods“, I muttered, kissing her lips. These fucking beautiful lips. She chuckled and bit my lower lip before pulling out, beaming at me. She stole another kiss. Soft, so careful like she was afraid I could break into pieces. Then she turned around and pushed her body against mine. I got the message and snuggled against her, wrapping her in my arms. She nestled her butt comfortable against my crotch, not minding only two layers of clothing separating her ass and my boner. She trusted me. It was a wild, all consuming comfort and intimacy – and fucking hot, not gonna lie. A long sigh escaped her when I put my palm on her chest, just above her breast so I could feel her heartbeat. My thumb stroked over her naked collarbone. She felt so good against my body.
„That alright for you?“, I muttered into her still damp hair.
„It’s perfect“, she whispered. Her hand came above mine, fingers intertwining. I felt her breath slowing down, together with her heartbeat. Her scent engulfed me. Citrus, lavender, Sloane.
She was so warm, so alive in my arms, it almost made me tear up. And she was okay.
„Aetos“, she mumbled, voice thick with sleep. I bit into her neck because she didn’t use my correct name. A soft chuckled escaped her lips.
„Thank you, Dain“, she said and my heart jumped. Gods, this woman.
„I got you, Mairi“, I whispered into her soft skin, kissing it one last time before I felt the sleep crashing over me like waves.
"Yeah, you do", her words faint, maybe I imagined them. 

She slept mostly soundly, but every now and then she would wince and thresh the bedsheets off her body. I always woke up. Every single time, like my body was alert.
„Everything’s alright“, I mumbled against her temple and pulled her close again, kissing her gently.
„L-liam“, she sighed. The pain eminent, even in her dreams.
„Dain?“, suddenly she froze. „DAIN“, her eyes opened in shock.
„I’m here, everything is fine“, I said. Her eyes were sparkling. Immediately she relaxed and I wrapped my arm around her stomach, pulling her close again. A long breath escaped her lungs.
„I-i thought you’d left“, she mumbled, words heavy with sleep, she drifted off again.
„K-killed you“, she added almost inaudible.
„You would never“, I said, my throat closing slowly. "I would never leave you like that"

Sloane

I woke up with a strained throat and my entire body felt tired and exhausted.

„Dain?“, I rasped, turning around, expecting to find him next too me in bed, but he was gone. I groaned. Of course he was gone. Fuck, what did I thought? We kissed, cuddled, he held me with a, according to the size, painfully hard on and didn’t made any move to touch me. Just cuddling and kissing, got it. Maybe it wasn’t enough to think about more. I cringed at the though. He looked so fucking good without a shirt and I hoped to get the chance to touch him a tiny bit more. The brown hair, peppering his skin, the toned abs and sun kissed skin. The devilish smile and laugh, these lips.

Done? Thoirt groaned in my head.
Can a girl think about a hot man without getting dumb comments from a freaking dragon? I snapped, rolling out of bed.
Maybe she should the precious time thinking about where the hot man might’ve gone.

My ears perked.

What do you mean?
Do you really think he would leave you after last night? Thoirt groaned. My heart picked up pace.
Yeah, I mean, it wasn’t like–
Do you really think that, marked one? This man is absolutely gone for you. I stared at my feet.
Where is he?
No idea, but Cath is gone too. And a few other dragons, including Marbh, Cuir and two gryphons.

Shit. I jumped out of bed, quickly put on my flying leather and ran down the hallway to start looking for Violet. I couldn’t find her in the archives or the cafeteria. The gym was empty too, more riders and flyers seem to be underway.
„Sloane“, the voice caught me off guard as I passed an open door without looking in it.
„Mira!“, I said, quickly entering.
„Where is everyone?“, I asked, looking around in the office, a map spread on the table. A sigh came from besides me and I saw Violet sitting in the corner.
„I’m glad you’re okay“, she said, smiling a tired smile at me.
„What?“
„After last night“, Violet said. Guilt hit me like a punch to the face. Violet had crusty scratches on her cheek and her cheekbone was bruised.
„Don’t tell me I did ..“, I said, kneeling in front of her. She huffed and rolled her eyes.
„I’m fine, Mairi“
„That was me, right?“, my throat closed. Slowly Vi nodded.
„It’s nothing. Really, I .. I walked into your dream and I saw what you dreamed. I don’t blame you, really“, a soft smile spread on her face. I dropped my eyes.
„Y-you should know, that Aetos and I discovered something“, I said, but as I said the words I remembered why I was here.
„Oh god, I-I“, I stuttered, standing up. „Where is he? And Bodhi? And Brennan“, I asked Mira. Mira and Violet exchanged looks and I inhaled sharply.
„Out with it“, fear was rising in my chest. Violet was chewing on her lips.
„He told us not to tell you“, Mira sighed and the fear turned into anger.
„Who? And what“, I hissed. Mira put her face into her hands and sighed.
„Dain. They’re in Athebyne“, anger exploded in my chest.
„He did what?“

Did you know about it?
I’m not gonna say anything.
What are you waiting for your lawyer or what the fuck, get ready, we’re leaving to Athebyne.
No we’re not.
We’ll see about that.

„Sloane, you were completely exhausted. Dain said when he checked on you this morning you were still completely wiped and done for good“, Mira said. When he checked on you this morning. They didn’t know he stayed. My reaction must seem completely over the top.
„What are they even doing there?“, I asked, huffing and sat down on one of the free chairs, taking in the office for the first time. It was a small room with tons of books about strategy and maps stuffed into the bookshelves. It didn’t have windows and if I’d to spent more time in here I would probably go crazy.
„Cleaning up old battle grounds, checking for remnants, people and clues about Xaden and Garrick“, Violet said, her voice sad and small.
„Athebyne and Resson has been months ago“, I huffed, realizing then what I mentioned.
„R-resson“, I stuttered. Violet caught my eyes. So much sadness laying in them. And something else. Guilt? I was unsure how to deal with the situation. I liked her. And respected her, but I felt so many conflicted feelings towards her. My parents died because of her mother. Her mother died because of me. Liam died because of her. What is it? 3:1 for her? She’s in the lead with killing important people in my life?

She did’t kill your parents and neither did she kill Liam.
You know what I mean. It’s connected.
Well it’s not. Words and thoughts have power. Don’t be irrational. If you forgive the hot wing leader you have to forgive the silver human as well.

Thoirt was right.
„Sloane, I’m ..“, Violet said, dropping her eyes.
„Violet, I, I’m not mad at you. It wasn’t your fault. Neither was it Dain’s. None of you could’ve done anything better because you were sure you were already doing it. We’re in this together now. I get it. But it will hurt, every now and then“.

My human grew up. I like that.
Get ready to fly.
I was wrong.

„I will fly to Athebyne. You aren't one to decide about where I’m stationed or if I go into battle“, I sighed, the stubbornness raging inside me.
„We didn’t decide. I wanted to sent you“, Mira lifted her arms in a defense manner.
„Dain said you were to tired and if we wake you up and sent you he would … let’s just say he was very angry when I suggested waking you up“, Mira took a sip from her cup like she just told me how the weather would be tomorrow.
„Dain is not my wing leader or any major person of authority. And not in the chain of commands. I am no longer a cadet at Basgiath. Technically you are my captain“, I say, looking Mira deep into her eyes. The imagine of her bleeding out shot into my head and I almost had to gag. The scar on her neck was still pink.
„You guys are driving me crazy. I don’t want any further discussion. You clear that up when Aetos is back“, Mira sighed.
„I’m going“, I stood up, zipping up my flight leather.
„It’s just a control mission, Mairi. They’re expected to be back in about 3-4 hours. You wont even be over there in that time“, Mira stood as well. Dang it, she was right.
„Not a battle, as you said. It’s just scouting“, Violet said, stepping besides me and putting a hand on my arm.
„Then you could’ve woken me up“, I snapped, shooting daggers at both of them. I turned around and left the room.
I didn’t really know why I was this angry at them. Was it because someone else decided for me? Was it because Dain was in potential danger? Was it because I was treated like a child?

Maybe because he’s visiting Resson? I immediately stopped walking in the middle of the hallway. A rider bumped into me because I stopped so rapidly.
I know you have forgiven him. But it's understandable if it feels uncomfortable for you.
It’s not discomfort. It’s just …
Him going there before you did?

I swallowed the tears rushing into my eyes and took a deep breath.

Nobody said forgiving was easy, marked one. But it’s the right thing to do. And you’re doing really good.
Can we fly later?
Not to Resson.
No, I think I need someone close who really gets me. I wasn’t one to ask for comfort or kindness, or hugs or anything, but with Thoirt I felt like it was okay.
Didn’t violet say the wing leader will return later this afternoon?
Nevermind, you don’t get me. I sighed and started walking towards the gym.
Maybe I do too well.

I hit dummy after dummy, did countless of pull ups and push ups, when Thoirt crashed into my mind.
Flying field, NOW. My heart stopped.
Cath says the wing leader needs you.

Chapter Text

Adrenalin shot through my veins, anxiety mixing with hit. This didn’t sound fun, or jokey – this sounded dangerous. I felt the tension in her voice.
I ran, in my fighting leather, as fast as I could through the hallways of Riorson house, through the courtyard and onto the huge flying field. I could only spot one red dragon - Thoirt. Next to her were Tairn and Teine. A bit further down the field a few dragons were sleeping in the midday sun.

Where are they? Out of breath I stopped a few hundred meters onto the grass.
Close, maybe 2 minutes. She hissed.
Do we know whats going on? Is he okay? My hands were ice cold.

„SLOANE!“, a voice behind me yelled and I turned around to see Violet and Mira come running as well.

What the fuck, Thoirt. Did someone die? Did Dain die? My throat closed.
I don’t know, Cath didn’t tell me more, he was too far away for long conversations, but they’re landing. I didn't get them here. Thoirt grumbled and pointed her head toward the other two dragons. If she didn#t call Tairn and Teine here, Cath must've. And If Cath did that, maybe it meant someone actually died. Maybe Dain. Maybe Brennan.
When I turned away from the Sorrengails I saw the huge red dragon a couple hundred meters away. My heart was racing so fast, my ears were rushing. He would be okay. He had to be okay. I only got to hold him once. We deserve more time. Please, gods.
„Tairn said there was an attack from Wyverns, no Venin but someone got hurt, Cath didn’t tell him who“, Violet said, holding onto the Conduit in her hands.
„Fuck“, Mira mumbled, when Cath crashed into the grass almost a little too fast. He came to a halt about 50 meters away and I started sprinting.
Dain climbed out of his seat. Relief washed over me. He was alive. Blood was covering a portion of his forehead and he was limping a bit but he seemed okay. When our eyes met, his widened. And immediately my relief turned into anger. Wait ... why the fuck would he demand all of us coming to the flying field because he has a fucking limp?
„AETOS!“, I yelled, angrily.

Control, marked one.

„Sloane!“, he said out of breath, about 20 meters away, walking as fast as he could.
„You fucking ASSHOLE! First you leave without telling me, to the graveyard of my fucking brother playing treasure hunt, making a decision that wasn’t yours to make, seeing Resson before I fucking did, then you TELL MY FUCKING DRAGON that I need to come here immediately, making me almost shit my pants and then all that’s wrong is you have a fucking limp? What the-“, I didn’t get to finish the sentence because Dain, reached me, cupped my face and pressed his lips onto mine. It wasn’t smooth or gentle. It was quick. Literally something to shut me up. Almost efficient and I froze. Then he pulled back. I saw the cut on his forehead.
„Uhm, that’s new“, Mira mumbled behind us. Violet huffed. „Yeah, not really“, she sighed.
„Listen, Slo, you are absolutely right and you get to scream at me as much as you want when we’re done here, okay? You can even hit me if you like, but Brennan fell from Marbh when he was attacked by Wyvern and he’s unconscious ever since. I couldn’t get to him fast enough. You need to mend him“, Dain said out of breath. My eyes got wide. The panic in his eyes made my stomach clench.
„Mending??“, Mira gasped behind me.
The anger was gone. Leaving me feeling like a kid, all alone. I saw the fear and pure panic in his eyes. He blamed himself. He couldn't do enough. He was not fast enough to safe Brennan. 

That’s why Cath didn’t say what’s wrong. He was too proud to make a fool out of its rider. I said to Thoirt. She just huffed, snapping at Cath.
It wouldn’t make a difference. They couldn’t bring the oldest Sorrengail here faster if someone knew. It not like the truth is making us fly faster.
Are you defending him?

Thoirt remained quiet. When I looked over I saw her staring at Cath. Angrily. Okay, they were busy.
„Hey? Mairi? You here with me?“, Dain said gently and I looked back up to him. He stepped a bit closer, our stomachs almost touching, still cupping my face.
„I know it’s scary but you got this okay? I know you do. He just needs to wake up“, Dain mumbled and I heard heavy, thundering wings in the sky while still looking into his eyes. His thumbs brushed over my cheeks. So fucking gentle. His stubble was speckled with blood, his lips so fucking mesmerizing. He did kiss me again. Everything was fine – at least between us.
„We got this“, I whispered, claiming, that he was in this with me. He understood what I said and nodded, a relieved smile on his face. 
„We got this“, he said and pressed a kiss onto my forehead.
„Interesting“, Mira said behind us and when I turned around, she quickly looked away.
„BRENNAN“, Violet yelled, rushing over to Marbh who just landed. Mira, Dain and I followed. Dain grabbed Marbh’s leg. He hissed but when Cath snapped at him, he let Dain climb him with a low growl.
„Thank you, Marbh“, Dain said quickly and I watched him climbing up the dragon.
„Hey mate“, he mumbled, grabbing Brennan who was held by Bodhi, also on Marbh’s back.
„He refused to let Cuir carry him, so we had so compromise“, Bodhi said, lifting Brennan into Dain’s arms to climb down in front of him, in case Dain slipped. Brennan wasn’t a small person, so carrying him down Marbh was a challenge. I heard Violet sniffle behind me and suddenly the pressure rose in my chest.
Bodhi and Dain put Brennan on the ground and Dain’s and my eyes met – he nodded.
I kneeled down next to Brennan. He was breathing calmly, so he seemed to be just unconscious. Not very helpful if the only mender is unconscious.
„I’m gonna repeat my words from earlier: Mending?“, Mira snapped and knelt beside me.
„Long story“, Dain sighed, taking his flying jacket off. Blood was covering his tunic underneath in the stomach area. But my eyes got caught on it.
„It’s fine“, he said, grabbing my chin und pointing it to Brennan.
„I’m not gonna siphon from you“, I refused, my hands already on Brennan.
„Slo, really, it’s okay, you can-“, „Take me“, Mira said.
„Take what you need“, she said holding her hands out. I sensed the change when I looked at Mira. The fear from last nights nightmare coming over me like ice cold water. My throat slowly closed.
„I-I don’t think thats a good idea“, Dain stuttered and Violet made an sound, resembling agreement.
„I-I need someone to.. he’s, I-I can’t do it without“, I gasped, panic growing bigger. Bodhi lifted Mira away and knelt down next to us.
„I have no fucking idea in what capacity you can mend or whatever, but I’ve got a bit left and I wasn’t hurt as badly as Aetos“, he took his flying jacket off while I looked over to Dain. His face was a guilty grimace.
„As I said, you can hit me later“, he just mumbled. He would’ve let me siphon him, I knew it, but the big, red blood stain on his abdomen made me shiver. I was absolutely going to hit him.
„Okay, I will.. you can back out any time. Hear me?“, I said to to Bodhi urgently.
„I trust you, little one. Go ahead“, he replied and I blushed. Not because it was hot or attractive, but because I was overwhelmed by his kind words and support. After nodding quickly I grabbed his arm, right under the rebellion mark I knew so damn well and put my other hand on Brennan’s forehead. Then I carefully opened the door to Thoirt’s force. Liam’s laugh was the first to arrive. Then the smell of wood, citrus, Bodhi’s laugh chimed in. Someone yelled „idiot!“, and it felt different than the times before. It felt smooth. Bodhi’s energy flowed into me and with a deep breath I let it glide over into Brennan. A black dragon thundered before my eyes. And I froze.

Dain

„You got this, Slo“, I whispered, brushing her hair behind her ear as it fell into her sweaty forehead. She started shivering and I put my flight jacket over her shoulders, brushing over her arms, making sure to not touch her unnecessarily because of the connection.
„B-black dragon“, she gasped and tensed.
„Relax. Don’t let it distract you“, I cooed. Mira and Violet’s eyes widened and Vi looked over to Tairn.
Sloane took a deep breath. Her eyes fluttering open. Relief washed over her face as she whispered:“I saw Naolin“. Then she seemed to realize what she said and shook her head like she wanted to shake of the confusion. Her hand fell off of Bodhi and Brennan and with a gasp Brennan started breathing loudly and a deep groan escaped the oldest Sorrengail.
„BRENNAN!“, Violet yelled, grabbing her brother. Voices got louder and everyone shuffled around to pull him into a seating position.
„You did it“, my mouth was close to her ear because otherwise I suspected she couldn’t hear me over the trembling voices of Mira and Violet. Confused she looked up to me. No exhaustion, no fear and a bit of surprise were displayed on her face.
„You did it, Slo“, I repeated, giving her the biggest smile I could.
„I didn't back out“, she whispered, looking at her hands, grabbing Bodhi’s arm, lost in thoughts and inspected it. He didn’t seem to mind as he was explaining Brennan what just happened. No mark.
„No mark“, she said in the same moment. I reach for one of her hands and kissed her palm.
„No mark“, I smiled and I saw her swallowing, blinking tears away. Then her demeanor changed.
„Don’t look so happy, you’re next“, she said, standing up, wobbling a bit.
„We have time“, I said, wrapping my hand around her waist.

After taking Brennan back to his room to sleep we stored away our weapons and some rider from the kitchen brought us something to eat into the meeting room, where Mira, Bodhi and Violet already took a seat.
„He will not sit at a table now, discussing some attack-bullshit, I will mend him now and then he rests. Come on, Aetos“, Sloan said, grabbing my arm. I winced and Mira smiled deviously. Violet put a hand in front of her mouth. Bodhi straight up laughed.
„Glad someone finally got Aetos under control, this man is feral!“, Violet said grinning.
„Never listens to anyone!“, Mira added.
„And follows no rules!“, Bodhi said.
„He needed to put in line urgently. Good work, Mairi“, Mira said. Sloane looked at them completely indifferent. And, if I was honest, that seemed way more scary than her angry face.
„Fuck all of you. I’m still mad you didn’t let me leave. Maybe one rider more could’ve kept Brennan from hitting his fucking head and this idiot from .. well, whatever is hiding underneath his clothes“, she said through gritted teeth and pulled me to the door. Gods, I liked her like this.
„Yeah, good point Mairi, go and find out what’s hiding underneath his clothes“, Bodhi said, taking a sip from his water. Sloane flushed deep red and I had to hide a chuckle.
„I’m talking about the fucking blood stain as big as Tyrrendor!“, she flipped them off, went back to the table, grabbing two muffins and apples and then pulled me out the door.
„I suggest my room“, I mumbled, still limping from the pain at my hip.
„Why? It’s farther away“, she said, walking towards her room.
„Bigger bed“, I mumbled. I was just kidding a bit. Sloane stopped and I almost stumbled into her.
„Fresh clothes, Sloane, gods, relax“, I said. „And you probably fit better into boxers and a shirt from me than I do into your stuff .. and if I’m honest, Liam’s boxers were a bit tight“. A grin stole itself onto my lips.
„I hope you’re allude to the size of your butt because if your hinting at the size difference between your and my brothers dick I will throw up onto your bigger bed“, she snapped, turned around and pulled my onto the upper floor. I chuckled. She was amazing.

Chapter Text

When we walked, well limbed, into my room, I was preparing for her to drown me in accusations and give me a lecture on how she’s an individual, autonomous being who get’s to make decisions herself, but she just shook my flying jacket from her shoulder, threw it into the corner of the room and wrapped her arms lightly around my neck. Stunned by her calmness it took me a heartbeat to respond.
„You alright?“, I whispered into her hair. „I’m really dirty and gross“, I added, trying not to smear blood onto her. She sighed deeply and nuzzled her nose into my neck. We didn’t get to cuddle a lot yesterday so this was special. It was still on the „wow, that’s new“-side of things and dammit, I loved it.
„I thought I lost you. Or at least you got hurt very badly“, she mumbled into my neck. My heart sank.
„I couldn’t let that happen. I haven’t kissed you enough to be ready to leave you, yet“, I smiled but she just pulled her head back, looking into my eyes. Her eyes were bright blue. Like the sky. And as weird as it might sound, she looked so much like Liam in that moment it made me catch my breath.
„I told you people I care about leave me. So next time, tell me. Wake me up, discuss it with me and pin me to the bed and then go, but don’t leave me anywhere without telling me where you went“, she said and I have never seen her this vulnerable before. My heart beat faster. She was letting me in. She was letting me close. My fear of fucking it up burned somewhere in my stomach, but I tried to ignore it.
„Don’t make a pinning to the bed joke now, Aetos, I’m too emotional, I’ll need a few minutes“, she added, trying not to smile, fighting the sadness and happiness at once. I just nodded and leaned down to her.
„I promise, next time I’ll tell you. I will however always fight with you about you staying safe but I will at least give you the chance to yell at me, okay?“, I mumbled against her lips.
„Promise?“, her breath was warm and tasted like chocolate muffin.
„I promise“, I replied, gently kissing her. She returned the kiss immediately a tiny sigh leaving her lips. It was a wild ride. Suddenly Sloane Mairi was worrying about me. I felt like a traitor and the happiest man alive at the same time.
„Dain?“, she asked, pulling back a tiny bit. „Hm?“, my eyes wandered over her face and I brushed a strand of hair out of her forehead.
„I want to wake up next to you tomorrow“, she admitted. My heart fluttered and I couldn’t help but smile.
„That means we would get sleep, right?“, I grinned and she shook her head.
„Who would’ve thought that Dain fucking Aetos would be a flirter and a joker“, she sighed, pulling her hands back, brushing over my beard gently.
„You love it“, I grinned and she huffed. „Lucky for you I do. Get on the bed“, she said, walking over to my wardrobe.
„Well, shouldn’t I at least shower before–“, „Shut up, Aetos and take the shirt off. Put this under you, I refuse sleeping in a bloody bed. Happens often enough for us women“, she sighed throwing a towel after me. I giggled, spreading it on the bed and carefully took my shirt off, brushing against my forehead, a hiss leaving me.
„Urgh, careful“, she scolded, walking over to me and helping me with my shirt. I caught her eyes checking me out, then she froze and gasped.
„DAIN“, she stage whispered. There it was.
„Are you out of your god damn mind?“, she said, pushing me towards the bed. I winced.

Sloane

My heart was racing, looking at the shirtless Dain, but not in the good way. A deep, bloody slash went from under his rips to the waistband of his pants, disappearing in it. The fabric ripped open and held together with only by his belt, which seemed to be magically stitched where it was also separated into two.
A thin trickle of light blood dripped out of the open wound. Around the edges of the cut the blood was dried and all in all it was dirty, gory and fucking gross.
„It’s not that bad“, he mumbled.
„Dain“, I sighed, grabbing his belt, opening it and reaching for the waistband, where I hesitated. I had not asked him if I could take his pants off, but I needed to see how deep the cut went. I looked up and he was already looking into my eyes as his hands caught mine and he guided them further down, together with his pants. I swallowed and he just nodded with a content expression on his face. My eyes wandered over his upper body to his lower. The cut ended around a hand’s width under his pelvic. Besides the gory wound I did, of course, realize a very naked Dain Aetos was standing in front of me. With blushed cheeks I couldn’t help to look at his groin while he shook his pants off. Heat smoldered in my stomach at his sight. He was, urgh, I sighed internally, perfect.
„I’m sorry, Slo. It hurts. I’m dumb. But Brennan was more important“, he mumbled. Dain Aetos saying sorry? Well, thats new, and fucking hot. I brushed some dirt away from his stomach with my hands, goosebumps spreading on his skin when I touched him. Then I ushered him to lay down. This wasn’t how I expected it to go having Dain Aetos naked splayed in front of me for the first time.

You imagined it?
Oh my god, out of my head. NOW. This is private.
Still, you need to get better at shielding your thoughts.

„Okay. But we should’ve done it faster“, I mumbled, putting my hand straight onto the cut. Dain winced and flinched, an „uff“ leaving his mouth. „I know, I’m sorry, I think this might be the most productive option“, I whispered, his blood coating my hand. I felt his stomach contract underneath my palm.
„It’s okay“, he said. „Wait“, he added and looked up.
„Where are you going to get the–“, „You get a little of mine. I’m fresh“, I said. His eyes wandered over my body, my trainings outfit drenched in sweat and his blood. „Well, mostly“, I added quickly.
„I can wait for Brennan or just rest“, his hand found my cheek and I looked into his eyes.
„Let me make my own decisions“, the words came from so deep within me, I didn’t even think them. They just escaped. „Trust me, please“. Dain’s face got endlessly soft.
„I trust you with everything, Love“, he muttered, leaned upwards and kissed me quickly. With a wince he laid back down. A slight blush covered my cheeks. He’s called me Love.

And he trusts you with everything. And he’s lying naked in front of you.
Yeah, that’s nice too. I giggled down the bond and I swear I could feel Thoirt rolling her eyes.
Now go. Away. Leave. Don’t come back ‚til I say so. Play with Cath or something.

Thoirt grumbled down the bond, then she backed away.
„Okay“, I said, readying myself and reaching for Thoirt’s power. It seemed to be easier every single time. It happened quickly until I felt Dain’s present, but this time I immediately heard voices. So apparently, I only get impressions when giving. That’s weird. Like a trade off? I offer something and get another thing in return? I heard Liam’s voice. He was talking about … us. Our family. It sounded faint. The wetness under my palm disappeared and I felt my force reaching the right point. Then I heard another voice – Violet. Liam seemed to be talking to her. He chuckled and Violet did too. A picture flashed before my eyes. Dain stood in front of a room in Basgiath. The door muffled the voices of Liam and Violet. Dain hesitated and then smiled. Happiness spread in my entire body. I felt his relief. „She is safe“, he mumbled. „You can trust us rebels, you know“, a sharp, deep voice boomed in my head. A dark haired person stepped into the picture. Xaden.
I inhaled a deep breath when I felt my powers abate as the wound seemed to be closed off. I fluttered my eyes open. And indeed - the cut was closed. A big, pink scar stretched over his abdomen onto his thigh.
„You are incredible“, Dain whispered and pushed onto his hands, looking down at his body. It was still bloody, but I let my fingers wander over the scar. Dain shivered and I pulled away but he grabbed my hand, keeping it on his skin roughly about the height of his waist. „No, it’s good. I-I like it“, he rasped and I blushed. My eyes met his. The electricity vanished as fast as it came. And somehow I just knew that he also knew what I saw. He wanted to trust Xaden back then. He wanted to trust us. The grief and sorrow of his decision against us anyways flooded his eyes. He was so sorry. So ashamed. Before he could say anything I leaned forward and kissed him. It was weird comforting him, even though he betrayed us. But as I learned from Felix, intention was the most important part when hurting other people. He thought he was doing the right thing. And he proofed that he understood the weight of his mistake back than. He endured the consequences and showed that he was better than that. Better than his father. He had to live with this regret and pain every time he saw me … and I had to do the same. But it was never his intention to get anyone genuinely hurt. He was a puppet. And it broke him.
„It’s okay“, I whispered against his lips, cupping his cheeks. „It’s okay“, I sniffled, suddenly aware of the tears of my cheeks. „I’m sorry“, he said, his lips grasping for mine. „I’m so sorry, Slo“. His hands roamed my back, as they were looking for dear life to hold onto something.
„I know, it’s okay“. He pulled me to his chest.
„I’m such an idiot to fly to Resson without you“, Dain admitted. I pulled back, even in his eyes tears where sparkling. I kissed his cheek. The taste of blood covering my lips. I smeared them at my sleeve.
„Let’s cut it for today, okay? I don’t know if I can take any more tears“, I chuckled through said tears and he smiled, kissing my, not so bloody cheeks, catching some tears.
„Deal“, he nodded.

After a bit of bickering he let me fix the cut on his forehead and after looking, maybe a bit too through fully, I didn’t find any other wounds on him, well, besides some small bruises.
„Well, that should be it“, I said, blushing a bit, as my eyes wandered over his crotch again, his dick half hard, making tingles spread in my entire body.
„Look at you, haven’t been touched by a girl in a while, huh?“, I tried to laugh the embarrassment away but Dain just smiled smugly, probably very aware of his fucking well build body.
„Nope, I’m pretty sure it’s very specifically because it’s you who touched me“, he grinned. I blushed even further.
„Causality“, I said, grabbing his pants from the floor, throwing them onto the dirty laundry pile next to his desk. Dain stood up, chuckling loudly.
„Correlation, Love. It’s definitely not the first time this happened when you touched me“, he mumbled and goosebumps spread over my body. I thought about his strained boxers last night. I got a bit lightheaded. Maybe because all of the blood of my body was in my fucking head.
„Wow, a speechless Sloane Mairi is definitely something new“, he muttered, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the room.
„Where are we going“, I asked, stumbling behind him, getting a great view of his naked backside.
„We need a shower“, he smiled when we walked through the bathroom door, turning around, pulling me close before locking the door with a swipe of his hand and magic.

Chapter Text

Dain

I cupped her cheeks and kissed her. Slowly, thorough. A little moan left her lips when our tongues touched for the first time. Everything before this had been smooches. Beautiful, but smooches. Her hand dug into my side and I enjoyed the spinning feeling of my head. Sloane pulled back after biting my lower lip. Her eyes hazy, happy and content.
„Don’t you think you should rest“, she said and let her eyes roam over me.
„You had a rough day, Aetos“, I enjoyed how her eyes got caught on my chest and wandered a bit deeper and licking her lips. That beautiful pink blush on her cheeks deepening.
„Please, stop calling me Aetos“, I huffed, leaning down and biting her neck. I didn’t make any move undressing her. It was weird that I was entirely naked and she was still in her fighting clothes but this was not about haste. This was about consent. And our speed. Even though I had to breathe very concentrated and deeply earlier on the bed to not get a raging hard on from her touch.
„But I love seeing you get mad at that“, she pouted and I kissed the pout away from her lips. A small chuckle escaped her when I tickled her.
„Slo?“, I sighed and brushed through her hair. „Mhm?“, she replied, planting a small kiss on the corner of my lip.
„I really want to wash the blood off“, I said, slowly pulling away from her. I observed her body language carefully. I didn't wanted to force or pressure her. She blushed, quickly letting her eyes wander around in my bathroom before catching my gaze again.
„Need help?“, she asked and bit her lip to avoid grinning. I slowly nodded.
„I’m absolutely helpless. I don’t even know how to use soap. Or water or–“, she giggled and while kissing me started working on her fighting leathers. Quiet filled the room when I helped her taking her clothes off. We fell into a deep calm, hands brushing, working slowly, no haste. I did see her shape yesterday. Gods, even details when her night gown was wet. But I tried not to look. But as usual with Sloane Mairi, I couldn’t look away.
After pulling her shirt and pants off, I helped her unwrapping her bandages on her chest. She blushed adorably pink when she dropped her hands and I got to gently brush the remaining fabric away from her skin, leaving her topless. Gods. I was so fucked. She was so fucking beautiful. I caught her eyes and bit of insecurity flickered through them. I caught her lips with mine, holding her naked back with my palms.
„You are so fucking beautiful“, I muttered. She grabbed my upper arm, pulling me towards the shower.
„Turn the water on, wing leader“, she smiled and grabbed the elastic of her panties.
„But, I wanna do that“, I nodded towards her hands.
„Enjoy watching for once“, Sloane smiled and I while I turned the water on, checking the temperature with my hands, my eyes didn’t leave her as she took her panties off. Slowly, avoiding my eyes, but moving smoothly. My cock twitched and I swallowed dryly as she stood in front of me entirely naked – finally. Shyly she walked over to me, grabbing the soap on the ledge next to the shower, on her way.
„Two showers together in two days“, she chuckled, pushing me under the water. My eyes fluttered close and I smiled contently as I felt gore, dirt and blood finally wash off.
„That’s the only way I ever want to shower from now on“. My smile got caught by her lips and I watched the water turning her wavy hair into long, slick and smooth strands, droplets running down her beautiful body while she starting soaping up my hair and my chest. She worked thoroughly and gently. Every single touch of her hands making me almost fall to my knees. I adored this woman. Finally she let me touch her too and I brushed my hands through her hair, washing away the sweat and some speckles of blood that got in there. She sighed and leaned into my touch and I realized that she needed this just as much as I did – and I’m not talking about the shower.
When I finished her back my hands brushed down her shoulders, hesitating, looking at her chest.
Sloane caught my gaze and kissed me gently as she grabbed my soapy hand and pressed it onto her breast. She smiled underneath my lips.
„Tell me when I shouldn’t do anything“, I muttered, spreading soap and goosebumps. My thumb circling her nipple, pinching it – being rewarded with a small wince.
„Of course“, she said, our eyes met again. „You too“. This blue would be the death of me.
„Of course“, I smiled kissing her, continuing with her upper body, wandering over her hips to her back and onto her butt. I did grab it yesterday but I let my fingertips fully sink into the flesh now, sighing at her ear and kissing the sensitive spot underneath it.
„Gods, you feel so good“, the word fell out of my mouth as I couldn’t hold back anymore.
„Mhm“, Sloane mumbled back, her hands drawing circles on my chest, brushing over my rips.
„I was dreaming of this“, she whispered, turning her head to catch my lips. She licked over them, savoring me, like she wanted to inculcate the taste on her tongue. Then she kissed my shoulder, my collarbone and a deep warmth spread in my stomach. This felt so fucking good.
„Me too“, I admitted, not using the chance to be cocky about it, or joke about how she just washed blood from my body. Her hands wandered down to my butt and I took a deep breath, cupping her head, kissing her hungrily. I moved my hips and pressed my dick against her stomach. She sighed deeply as her hands wandered to my crotch.
„That alright?“, she breathed before nipping on my lip. Her fingertips brushed through the collection of hairs trailing down from my belly button into the trimmed, rougher hair. My heart fluttered because she was asking for consent too.
„Yeah“, I just gasped because I was so fucking horny right now she could’ve asked anything from me. A wide smile spread her face and she started placing kisses onto my finally clean skin. First my shoulder, then my collarbones again. Her delicate fingers gently wandered over my length, savoring every single centimeter. After peppering my entire chest with kisses, sucking cheekily on my nipples she kissed my sternum and wrapped her hand around me. I moaned and this moment was easily one of the most erotic ones in my life. I never had sex like this before. And we haven’t even started yet. I felt so safe. It dawned on me, that never during sex I felt safe or really, genuinely comfortable. Yeah, it was lust and hunger and maybe love in the past, but I for once, got to be vulnerable in someone else’s hands. I was not Dain Aetos, the wing leader, Dain Aetos, son of General Aetos right now. I was Dain. Her Dain. And whatever version she saw right now – god I liked to be this version. My body was wax in her hands.
„I really like you, Dain Aetos“, she whispered against my skin before kissing the place above my peck underneath which my heart was racing. It was telling. I couldn’t hide it. Her hand started stroking my length, holding me careful but firm. Perfectly. My hand combed through her hair, my fingertips running over her scalp.
„I really like you too, Sloane Mairi“, I replied, holding in a gasp when her thumb gently brushed over my tip, spreading the pre cum like she knew exactly that it drives me absolutely crazy.
„Good“, she smiled, kissed my lips and sank to her knees. My heart stumbled.
„Sloane, this is not a good idea“, I rasped, cupping her cheek. With closed eyes her lips brushed over the scar she produced minutes earlier. Kissing from the top of it on my rips gently down to the end on my thigh. I could easily come from just this touch.
„In a ‚I wont last long‘ way? Or in a ‚I decided I don’t want this‘ way?“, she whispered into my skin, nuzzling her face into the creese between hip and crotch, licking and nipping on the skin.
„The first one. I don’t think I ever wanted anything more“, I blushed while admitting it. Her eyes wandered up to mine, a smile on her lips. A genuine one. No cheekiness. It made her happy. My heart stuttered.
„Just a few licks, okay?“, she tried to negotiate, pouting her face. I shook my head and rolled my eyes.
„You get three, Mairi“, at these words she smiled and bit her lower lip. I tried to mentally prepare for what was next, but gods, this was my literal dream. I was feeling like I never got a blow job before. Sloane placed a featherlight kiss on my tip and then let it slowly slide into her mouth. Oh fuck. I braced my hand on the ice cold bathroom tile behind her. I was towering over her, keeping her trapped between my big body and the wall. Her warm breath leaving her nose brushed over my length as she slowly drew back. It dropped out of her mouth with a wet smack. She didn’t hesitate as my cock nudged heavily against her lips. She closed her eyes again and gave it another go, taking it in deeper and deeper. My eyes fluttered closed and I grabbed her head in response, moaning. Holding it carefully. Not pushing into her. I would never without her consent.
„Gods, Baby“, I whispered and when I looked down she opened her eyes, these fucking blue eyes, with my dick in her mouth and I saw in her eyes that she was enjoying it. Not in a cocky way. Not in a funny „making me suffer“ way. But in an intimate way. Enjoying the way she was making me feel by doing this to me. My thumb brushed over her cheek as she drew back, enjoying every centimeter slipping out of her mouth. She added a deep breath after it slipped out again. And swallowed some spit.
„I-I never really did this to anyone, I hope it’s okay“, she said, reaching for my cock, gently stroking it, her tongue circling my tip. I grabbed her cheek.
„What?“, I asked confused. Sloane looked up to me, then back down, her fingertips brushing over my abs, leaving trails of goosebumps.
„Hey, eyes here, Mairi“, I said gently, lifting her face up. She seemed genuinely embarrassed and insecurity sparkled in her eyes – that was a new emotion to find there. Sex was a thing that made the fierce, strong Sloane Mairi unsure. Gods.
I kneeled down, getting on eye level with her. The water still trickling down on us, making it feel like we where kneeling in a rainstorm. On a battle field. But this was  actually the closest thing to peace I could imagine. 
„Should I have told you?“, she asked but I just caught her mouth with mine. It was slick with us. I kissed her so deeply, she came up gasping for air. Her back pressed against the tiles because I put in so much force.
„I don’t fucking care“, I whispered against her lips, kissing them again and again and again.
„As long as this is something you’re doing because you genuinely want to, I’m gonna do it all with you“, I muttered, eyes closed, forehead against hers. My hands brushed over her back, cupping her butt. She nodded timidly. When I opened my eyes, hers were already open. I pulled her up into a standing position, kissing her neck, her collarbone, the peaks of her breasts. We intertwined our fingers on one hand and … did this ever feel so good, so right?
„Did you have sex before?“, I mumbled into the warm skin between her breasts, lips brushing her sternum.
„Twice. I was drunk“, she admitted. I hesitated and a weird feeling spread in my chest.
„I wanted it“, she quickly added like she was reading my mind. I nodded. Back at her lips we just stood there. Her hands wandered over my entire body. Caressing scars, ridges, smooth and rough patches. It was fucking beautiful. My hands cupped her ass, her breasts. Giggles and content smiles filled the warm and steamy room.
„You did good, tho“, I said in between kisses. „Mhm?“, Sloane looked up.
„Blowing me“, I grinned, biting her collarbone. „I mean, you can practice as much as you want on me“, I snickered, my tongue licking over the mark of my teeth. She huffed and pulled on my hair.
„I’ll think about it“, she grinned. My eyebrows furrowed.
„You didn’t like it?“, eyes wandering over her.
„Oh I did! A lot, but I don’t to give you a god complex“, her arms wrapped around my neck. I chuckled and lifted her onto my hips. Her hips being beautiful friction for my painfully hard dick.
„Can I take you to bed, Sloane Mairi?“. She sighed deeply.
„I couldn’t think of anything better“, Sloane replied.

Sloane

Dain carried me back into his room. My nose was buried in his neck and even though we just cleaned ourselves through fully, I smelled him on his skin. The earthy, pine smell. And he was mine, at least for right now. His hands were so big and deliciously fitting on my butt.
He sat me down and handed me a towel, watching my every move as I dried myself off.
„Can I expect the usage of your wing leader voice, Aetos?“, I smiled and bit my lip as he toweled his hair dry.
Dain froze and raised his eyebrows.
„Just to get teased by you about it?“, he asked and reached for my towel.
„Yeah. But it’s also kinda hot“, I shrug my shoulders and cross my arms in front of my chest. After hanging up the towels he turned around. His length was standing straight like a soldier, making my cheeks blush. God, he was so fucking attractive, it was almost unfair.
„Get on the bed, Mairi“, Dain growled in his wing leader voice and took a sip from a water bottle on his desk. I chuckled.
„Yeah, I love that“, I chirped and hopped over to the bed, jumping on it.
„No, the edge“, he corrected me splaying in the middle of it. I sat up, watching him prowling over to me. I couldn’t think of a better sight.
„Edge, Mairi“, Dain commanded after I didn’t move immediately. I had to admit, the voice was doing it’s thing for me and even though I felt a bit of panic as the normal reaction to him being strict, I still blushed and smiled widely. I shuffled to the edge of the bed, tucking my knees to my chest, grinning at Dain coming to tower over me.
„Open your legs for me“, he said, a bit softer. My heart fluttered at the voice shift and maybe, just maybe, I even liked the soft voice more, even when it came to sex. I had sex with two guys before him. I spread my legs, Dain appearing between my thighs, together with his palms on my knees, guiding them gently. Then he knelt down and that was so fucking hot. I swallowed. I could spot that he was trying to be dominant and play the wing leader role, but every time his gaze washed over me he softened and something else than hunger laid in his eyes.
„Good girl“, he whispered, his voice sending shivers over my entire body. I felt it on my thigh, right before his lips grazed my skin, planting soft kisses on the inside of the thigh.
„I like it when you obey“, he said but when our eyes met, there was a smile in them. Like we both couldn’t stay serious.
„Yeah, it’s quite helpful for a wing leader enjoying to be dominant“, I chuckled. One of his hands found mine and we intertwined fingers, his thumb brushing careful circles over mine.
„No, Mairi“, he whispered, kissing my lower stomach, then my outer lips. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
„I like it when you trust me“, Dain said so fucking gently and brushed his lips over my clit. I moaned, my head falling back onto the sheets and goosebumps exploded on my entire body.
„I trust you“, I replied instantly, without thinking about it.
„You might be biased“, he chuckled, the tip of his tongue running through my folds. Gods, it felt so fucking good. „Your decision making might not be on point right now“, he added with a smirk I could feel.
„I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t on point, right?“, I said breathless and for a heartbeat Dain froze. Our eyes met, and I realized that in this exact moment, that I did choose him. This wasn’t niceties. I had so many reasons not to choose him, but I did. I felt like I could see the dawning in his eyes. The realization. My hand cupped his cheek and I brushed a bit of wetness off his beard. My wetness.
„Go on, Baby“, I smiled softly and he smiled back. A content, genuine smile.
He didn’t need more words and got back to work. He didn’t make me beg and even though I was quite sure he would in the future, this right here was an important moment. Something was growing. Blooming.
I sighed deeply as he kept working his tongue, lips and teeth on my core. He licked, sucked and relished my folds and clit. Every now and then he hummed when I moaned and I felt it echoing through my entire body.
„This is so good“, I whispered, my fingers clawing at his hair when he pushed me closer and closer to coming.
„Oh!“, I moaned surprised and I saw Dain’s eyebrows furrow.
„Anyone ever did this to you, Slo?“, he whispered, nipping on my outer lips. I didn’t answer. Shame washed over me.
„Sloane“, he said again, his warm mouth leaving my warm center. I tried to push his head back down, but he refrained.
„Baby“, he said, lifting his head completely. Our eyes met.
„I should’ve asked“, he sighed. I sat up and brushed through his damp curls. His eyes closing immediately at my touch.
„No, Dain. I’m a big girl, I can say no“, I whispered, my nose brushing his carefully. I lowered my legs and he was kneeling between them, his arms resting besides my thighs, his eyes still closed.
„We could’ve talked about it. I mean, you’re a first year“, he admitted. I huffed.
„Yeah, that’s why I didn’t tell you“, I said. His eyes opened back up. Warm caramel staring right at me.
„Everyone fucks like fucking rabbits. And I wanted you to treat me normally. I am not …“, I growled frustrated, digging my fists into my eyes.
„You’re not what, Slo?“, he whispered, his lips kissing my wrist.
„I’m also the little one, Dain. I’m always the little sister. Liam’s little sister. Everyone knows me only as that. As the young first year. They didn’t wanted me to cross the parapet, they wanted to take care of me. Fucking hell, I don’t need to be coddled, I’m a strong, independent“, my voice broke and I swallowed the lump in my throat.
„And every time I let the weakness slip, for once don’t want to be fierce, I’m transported back to being a helpless little girl and people treat me like that“. I realized my words were contradictory. So I sighed frustrated, trying to push Dain away, but he didn’t budge and wrapped his arms around my lower back, his lips kissing my jaw.
„I’m afraid of being weak because I’m worried it will destroy my reputation or take away from my authority. And make a fool out of me. Especially as the son of the general, which is wild because, there is no one on this planet I’m despising more currently than him. Sounds quite contradictory to me as well“, he huffed, kissing my neck. I let my fingertips run gently over his rips.
„Sloane“, he said, pulling back to look into my eyes.
„I am not saying I know how you feel, because I do not. But I know that you’re fierce, strong and incredibly resilient. And even though you are all these things, you still get to be weak or exhausted sometimes. Even though being not fierce and strong doesn’t resemble weak, but that’s something else to unpack“, he huffed. His forehead fell against mine. My heart was beating a bit slower and less rapidly.
„And feeling conflicted and contradictory is absolutely normal. I’m always torn between thinking I only feel like this because deep down I just feel guilty. And treating you well might one day lift that guilt. And on the other hand“, Dain sighed, took one of my hands and placed it on his chest. „You make me feel like this. And as far as I remember guilt doesn’t do that“, he said and then nodded down to his crotch. „Or that“. He blushed a bit and I did too.
„I don’t care if you’re strong or fierce or weak or annoying or whiny. I’m a fucking pain in the ass myself“, he whispered, his lips now hovering over mine. „I care about you. And I like you. The entire package, Sloane Mairi. And you make my heart flutter like I never felt before and you’re in my dreams and in my shower even when you’re not next to me because one thought of you makes me to fucking hard, I can’t do anything else but touch myself“. My heart beat faster and hotness flushed my entire body.
„And if you want to, I’m down for everything with you. For being fierce and feeling sad. If you’re down for me being a rule loving dick with guilt issues and a raging god complex if you look at me like I’m the hottest thing you’ve seen in months“, he chuckled.
„I haven’t seen anyone naked in months, so the bar is low, Aetos“, I chuckled. My first words. He flashed me a huge smile. He shook his head and I grabbed his chin.
„I think I’m falling in love with you, Dain. And it scares me. But you are indeed very hot“, I sighed and shrugged my shoulders. He was quiet, taking me in. For a second I was afraid he was hurt by my words about being scared.
„I think I passed the falling stage a long ass while ago“, he sighed, capturing my lips with his. Gentle, but determined. I wrapped my arms around his necks and he lifted me up at my hips, standing up with me just to put me down gently onto the bed. My back hitting the sheets so softly, a moan escaped my lips.
„And you haven’t even fucked me yet“, I sighed when he sucked on my neck, his heavy body covering mine so deliciously. He chuckled.
„Yeah“, he sighed, his hips buckling, his length moving over my crotch. A mix of pre cum and wetness helping it slide so wonderfully smooth. „Working on that one“, he chuckled. I sighed, kissed him deeply as his hips pulled back a bit and he cupped my cheek, catching my eyes.
„You’re in?“, he asked breathlessly, his tip nudging my entrance.
„I’m so fucking in“, I smiled and his lips found mine again when he gently slid inside me. I moaned and a deep sigh escaped his lips. I held my breath when he sank deeper, centimeter after centimeter.
„Gods, Baby“, Dain growled and bit my neck. He was so warm, so big, so heavy on me. It felt like we were made for each other when after a few slow thrusts he bottomed out. Dain stayed in that position, breathing heavily, heaving.
„You alright, little one?“, he whispered into my ear. And I sighed happily and content.
„More than that“, I whispered. Our eyes met and I had never seen him so happy. He was glowing. Happiness radiating from his smile and eyes. He nodded, sighed a „Yeah“ and then kissed me while slowly starting to move his hips. We fell into a rhythm. His hips moved at a steady pace yet so smooth, like he was savoring every single stroke.
„You feel“, he started, breathing heavily. „So good“, he added, leaning back, grabbing my shins and pressing them down next to my upper body. I moaned deeply at the different angle.
„Gods, Dain“, I whispered, crumbling under his touch, his movement. Slowly I felt tumbling closer and closer to the edge of my orgasm. I grabbed his hand, intertwined his fingers with mine and pulled it to my lips to kiss it. When I opened my eyes he was smiling at me, still pushing himself into me. Over and over again. He fell forward again to capture my lips. Planking above me, his lips nipped on my chin. He rolled his hips in deep waves and I felt that he was trying to buy time cause he was close already. His hot breath hit my lips and his chest brushed coarsely over mine.
„Baby“, he whispered. „Mhm?“, I replied, looking into his eyes.
„Ride me, please“, he admitted and a warm shower washed over me. He handed me control. Cause he trusted me.
„I need you to ride me, Sloane. I want to see you on top of me“, he stuttered, his voice rough, choppy. I nodded while I bit my lip, and pressed up. He wrapped his arm around me and rolled onto his back, taking me with him and I wound up straddling him, without him slipping out of me. I gasped, because this angle was so much deeper.
„Take what you need“, Dain rasped, eyes glossy. I never sat on top before. The guys I slept with where done so quick, I thought that would’ve been everything. They took me hard, aggressively and punched me to my orgasm in no time. It was effective. This … This was something entirely different. I felt Dain pulse inside of me, his abdomen contracting and saw the concentrated stare in his eyes. He lifted his hand and laid his thumb on my clit, rubbing gentle circles. Together with feeling him hitting this beautiful spot deep inside of me when I moved awkwardly up and down I almost came immediately.
„Like that?“, I mumbled breathless, cause my movement was hilariously choppy.
„Just like that, Baby“, he muttered, pressing up on his hands, sitting up. His lips caught mine and his free hand found my breast. He pinched my nipple and I gasped into his mouth.
„You’re doing so well“, Dain whispered right before catching my breast with his lips. I let me head fall into my neck and let out a loud, unrestricted moan. I felt like falling, but in a good way. My heart fluttered and Dain grabbed my back as I grabbed his neck. I leaned back into his hand, creating a bit of tension so his dick stroked one specific spot inside of me and then I fell apart.
„Let go, Baby“, Dain whispered against my collarbone and I did. My entire body cramped up and electricity shot through every cell. I shuddered and sighed and moaned as Dain kept working me. He pulled me back down so he was on his back, tugging me against is chest. Then he started moving his hips and thrusting me from underneath. I wasn’t even done yet, I kept coming when he picked up pace.
„You feel so fucking good“, his words so soft at my ear when he nipped on my earlobe.
„Gods I love this so much. You’re doing so well“, he moaned and one last shower rushed through my body, a sudden release finding me, wetness collecting between us and I realized that it was mine. I never squirted before. Dain chuckled deeply, his arms wrapping tighter around me.
„Good girl“, he growled and I blushed.
„Can I come inside you?“, his voice was so rough, like there was no air left in his lungs, his hips relentlessly pounding. My legs felt wobbly and tired. „Or should I stop?“. The words made my heart melt. I pulled back, looking into his eyes. I was so fucked with this man.
„Come for me“, I whispered and kissed him. „Please“, I begged. Dain nodded, capturing my lips. His release was imminent. Warmth filling me up, running down and pool between us. Dain was panting, just as I did. His eyes closed. Awkward and choppy he rocked his hips into mine. Slowing down more and more. Then he came to a halt. He looked so beautiful. Maybe I should tell him. How often had he heard something like this?
„Dain“, I said gently, cupping his cheek. He just sighed.
„Eyes here, Aetos“, I chuckled and he lifted his head. Eyes glazed and hooded.
„You’re so beautiful“, I whispered. He blinked and swallowed.
„You’re too“, he admitted with a rough voice. „The most beautiful thing I have ever seen“. His big, rough hands gently brushing over my back.
„This is not a competition, Aetos“, I chuckled and he snapped for my mouth, catching my lower lip. He moved his hip and lifted me up gently, slipping out of me. We both looked at the stickiness between us.
„Hey, uhm, would you be interested in showering with me?“, I asked, sounding like I asked him for hanging out of a Wednesday afternoon. Dain chuckled and damn, I loved this sound. He sat up and cupped my face. Kissing me slowly. So fucking gentle and sweet. My heart fluttered at the touch of his lips. Dain Aetos, the soft kisser. He easily scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the shower.

„Was it okay?“, Dain whispered into my ear 30 minutes later. My back was pressed against his chest. Skin to skin, naked, no clothes. It was 5 in the afternoon, but I wouldn’t wanted to be anywhere else. I turned my head and his eyes roamed my face.
„It was never like that“, I admitted and for a heart beat fear flashed over his eyes.
„I loved it“, I added quickly. A shy smile spread on his lips. „Yeah. Me too“, he sighed and pulled me back into his arms before kissing my naked shoulder.

Chapter Text

I woke up roughly an hour later. Dain was still splayed on his back, I tucked into his side. With a deep sigh I let my hand run over his chest, brushing over Cath's tail. His skin reacted immediately, goosebumps spreading all over his skin. He mumbled something and then opened his heavy eyes.
„You can keep resting“, I whispered into his skin, kissing his chest and rested my hand on his rips.
„And miss this?“, his voice was rough. He focused his tired eyes on me.
„What?“
„You in my bed“, Dain rasped.
„I thought we already cleared that we will wake up together tomorrow morning“, I planted tiny kisses onto his pec, a few soft hair tickling my nose. My fingertips ran over his rips, then over his stomach, touching every single ridge, ending at the scar I gave him only a few hours ago, even though it felt like days.
Dain didn’t say anything. No joke, no cheeky answer, he just looked at me with a soft, content smile on his lips. He then bowed his head and caught my lips. The same gentle way he did before we went showering. It didn’t feel horny, all consuming and life changing. It was something else. He caressed my upper lip, then my lower lip. His tongue sweeping lazily over mine. Touching it gingerly.

Dain

My heart pounded in my chest when I looked at her. Gods, she was so fucking beautiful. And fuck, I was in love. At least falling. Fucking hard. Her lips tasted like home, like comfort, her warmth made me feel secure, like I could finally let go.
After kissing her for another few minutes I turned towards her and she fell onto her back. She opened her arm and I crawled into it. It was hilarious as she was way smaller than me, but I, for once, wanted to be held. Not as a child, but as a grown up. My arm wrapped around her and I nuzzled my nose into the crook of her neck, taking a deep breath. Smelling her skin, my soap and a bit of herself. Then she held me. Her arms wrapped around mine and nose buried in my hair. Her breath weaving through my strands and her lips warm on my scalp. And thats when I realized we both needed this. Someone to hold on to. Because we had no one for a very long time. I felt tears collecting in my eyes.
„Hey“, Sloane whispered, pulling her head back. I didn’t meet her eyes.
„Look at me“, she said even softer. „Everything alright?“, her lips kissed my forehead. She didn’t force me to look up and I was so thankful for that. I wasn’t used to showing weakness.
„I lied to you“, I said after a few heartbeats of silence. She didn’t move.
„Okay..?“, she asked slowly. I sniffed, my face still pressed into her skin.
„I’m sure it’s not that bad. Was it about not coddling first years? Or about sticking to the codex? Because you fucked that up, Aetos“, she huffed and I did too, sniffing again so I wouldn’t get snot on her.
„Tell me“, another soft touch of lips on my forehead. She had never been this gentle to me. Well, before today in general, but she just waited for me to be honest. No pressure and most of all, she trusted me enough that it wouldn’t be something horrible. Even though I felt like it was.
„I do not ‚do this bullshit‘, how you call it, because I feel like I owe Liam. A bit maybe, but that’s not the main reason. All this taking care of you stuff, looking out for you, making sure you work on your signet“. I took a deep breath, pulling my face back, meeting her so fucking beautiful eyes. They were kind, asking, wondering but patient. I wasn’t going to tell her something new, but I never put it into words.
„I do it because I care for you. You’re incredible, Sloane“, I let my hand absentmindedly wander over her collarbone, feeling her heartbeat. Then it slipped down the ridge of her breast, brushing over her nipple. It immediately got hard and I would lie if I said I wasn’t already. I took a few moments to cup her breast, gently press it. Hoping I get to do this more often now. Then I slid the hand under the blanket, landing on her hip, pulling her even closer to me. I sighed.
„You are absolutely stunning. To take my breath away. You are fierce, beautiful, strong, stubborn and god, so fucking talented. And the reason why I lied is that it scares me“, I whispered. My eyes stayed closed. Like I could avoid a negativ reaction by simply not looking.
„I’m afraid that one day, if I ever, for whatever magical reason, might have you, I wake up and realize I only did this to sooth the guilt buried in my stomach“. Then a tear dripped down my cheek. I created the thought the moment I voiced it. Sloane was still. Quiet. Like she was processing the words.
„You think fucking Liam’s sister would sooth the guilt?“, she said dryly after a while. Her voice raspy. It sounded entirely neutral. No joke. No sarcasm. Not entirely honest either.
„No, being kind to you, being nice .. lo..“, I stopped, sighing into her skin. „Loving you“, I finished the sentence.
„If you think you could sooth the guilt by loving me, I think thats counterintuitive to being convinced you’re a bad person. If you really think so little of yourself, would you think you’re the best thing that could happen to me? Or wouldn’t it be way smarter to fuck off and get as much distance as possible between me and you? I think liking me might be the single most unlikely thing for you to feel like when you are genuinely just feeling guilty. If it would be about being kind to me, being friendly, I get that. I get that you or someone would do that out of guilt. But love and wanting to be close to me? I think that implicates that you think of yourself as worthy to be close to me and … loving me“, at the end her words where only a whisper.
„What if I just want to protect you?“, I rasp. My throat was dry. She was so incomparable smart.
„Does protecting include fucking?“, she asked with a smirk on her lips.
„Maybe if I’m a egocentric bastard“, I chuckle. „And, honestly, you’re really fucking hot“. She blushed and kicked my shin with her feet.
„I doubt you wouldn’t let yourself near me, if only guilt was driving you. Or .. to be honest..“, she stopped and turned her face towards mine, together with her whole body. My hand slipped onto her butt, pulling her close, her leg slipping between mine.
„I just hope for it“, she paused, her nose touching mine. „I only hope it isn’t guilt driving you. Because I’m afraid I would accept it“, she swallowed.
„I don’t know what I deserve anymore, Dain“, my heart dropped.
„But I’m okay with finding out. And I would like to do that with you. Cause I … I really fucking like you, Aetos“, she huffed and I blushed this time. I swallowed some tears.
„Dain“, Sloane whispered. „Mhm?“
„I trust you“. Her words made my ears ring and my heart swell. „I trust you. And I forgive you. And I might love you but I’m in a very not so neutral situation right now, because you are very naked and also very fucking hot and I’m already very fucking horny again so I might be biased“, she said quickly, her words tumbling.
„But I am sure that I trust you. And if you’re down I would like to figure that love thing out. Even though I am absolutely terrified I might loose you“. She held her breath, like she …
„Did you just ask me out, Mairi?“, I chuckled and winced when her thigh pressed into my balls.
„Would you say yes?“, I grinned at her words and pressed my lips to hers.
„Yes, Sloane Mairi, I would love to go out with you“, I smiled and kiss her harder.

Five minutes later she was laying on her stomach, my dick in her mouth. I sat against the headboard, legs left and right of her, closed eyes, moaning.
„Fuck“, I mumbled, my hand gently brushing through her hair. Sloan’s head bopped up and down and my hips jerked without me being able to control it. She moaned and pulled back to work on the head.
„Yeah, like that“, I mumbled breathless, watching her. Her eyes fluttered open and she blushed.
„You’re doing so good, Baby“, I whispered. Who would’ve known that praise would get Sloane Mairi to shut the fuck up. Her eyes fell close again and I just watched her mouth move up and down, her tongue licking. She locked calm as her legs crossed at the ankles, her round butt beautiful in the fading daylight. I reached for my cock, stroked it two, three times, when our eyes met. Insecurity flashing in her blue eyes.
„Not good?“, she asked, licking her lips, watching my hand wandering up and down my length.
„Too good, Mairi“, I smirked and pressed it forward so it thudded against her lips.
„I’m close“, my voice rough when she smiled and kissed my tip.
„Let me swallow“, she mumbled, her lips closing around the head.
„Slo, you don’t need–“, „But I want to“, she interrupted me, taking in almost all of me, and my head fell back against the headboard. „Shit“, I muttered when my legs started shaking.
„You taste so good“, she whispered into the crook of my crotch, planting kisses onto my skin while moving her hand up and down.
„I think that’s my new favorite thing to do“, she chuckled and continued sucking while I held my breath.
„Yeah, me too“, my breath was barely a gasp and I clenched my eyes.
„Eyes here, Aetos“, she breathed against my cock and when our eyes met again, I came into her mouth and without breaking the eye contact she swallowed and reached for my hand, intertwining our fingers. My heart was racing, my body was shaking, the waves of my orgasm came crashing down again and again, when finally it was over and I gasped for air. Sloane climbed up over my body, straddling me, putting her face against my neck and I wrapped my arms around her.
„Yeah I don’t know about that swallowing part“, she chuckled and I started laughing.
„No need for that, Baby“, I said, my hands wandering down her naked body, happiness spreading in my chest.
„Worth a try“. I huffed and lifted her chin to kiss her. „You did very, very good cadet“, I murmured against her lips and a sharp pain rushed through my chest where she pinched my nipple.
„I thought you liked the wing leader voice“
„I think I might like baby or good girl more“, she whispered and kissed my collarbone.
„I call you whatever you want me too“, I replied with a big smile on my lips. Slowly she started moving her hips, rolling against mine. And while I was still sore I felt the urge building again. We smiled, got lost in kisses when suddenly a loud noise thundered through the third floor. We looked up and I held her instantly close.
„What was that?“, Sloane said, already tying to stay up.
„I don’t –“, a high picked scream followed and we immediately got up and put our clothes on.

Sloane

With a racing heart and wobbly legs I ran down the corridor next to Dain. His hair was rustled and he looked incredibly adorable.
„Oh my god“, someone whispered. Doors were opened and people flooded the corridor. Pink hair flared up in a door frame before us.
„Imogen? What are you doing here?“, Dain snarled. Her eyes were wide.
„We arrived one hour ago. Aetos, not you, father dickhead, went absolutely mad. We’re all here“, she said and followed us down the corridor.
„We need Brennan!“, someone yelled at the end of the corridor and we rounded the hallway just in time to see Violet’s panicked face.
„What’s going on?“, I yelled, tried to get past Dain, but he pushed my back behind him. I hit him, but he kept me back.
„Let me through, I-“, „Tavis?“, Dain whispered.
„What?“, Imogen said behind us. Without saying another word, Dain immediately stepped aside and instead of pushing past him I stepped aside as well. It was instinct. Imogen rushed past me a heartbeat later. When I looked after her, finally seeing what was in front of me, my heart stopped.
He was covered in blood. Laying on the ground. Violet kneeled next to him, her hands covered with blood as well. One of his arms was in a weird angel and one eye was completely swollen shut. His locks covered in dirt, mud and dried blood just like his clothes. He didn’t move. I gasped and Dain reached for my hand and pulled me close to him and I didn’t budge, instead I tumbled into his side, wrapping my arm around him. 
„Garrick?“, Imogen whispered and fell to her knees next to the lifeless body. Tears clouded my vision.
„SOMEONE GET BRENNAN“, Violet shrieked and I was about to turn around but Dain let go of me and started running.

THE END

(But to be continued ...)