Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The end of the world happened in the blink of an eye. 

Oh, humanity had fought back. But by the time they realised what was happening, it was too late. The organisation known as Division and their fucked up experiments had taken over. What had started as one Cyber became two, became four, became dozens, became thousands. Now, most of humanity had been converted, the survivors being hunted down one by one. 

It didn’t help that the Cybers looked human, except for a couple of key details that were near impossible to see until you were way too close – eyes of silver, and a mark on the back of their neck where they had been hooked to a conversion chamber. 

Devoid of emotion, they only had one mission – convert every human into a Cyber. With their speed, agility, and night vision, they were nearly impossible to kill; the only ways that had been found were by stabbing (or shooting, though ammo had become few and far between) the spot where they were hooked to the conversion chamber, or decapitation – neither of them an easy feat. 

There was a reason there were so few humans left. 

Some of them that remained were just as dangerous as the Cybers – bandits who raided other camps for food, information, whatever they might need at the time. 

In summary, the world was fucked. 

Yasmin Khan – Yaz, to her few friends who remained – knew that better than anybody. 

Unofficial leader of one of the last groups of resistance against the Cybers, it was hard not to feel like the weight of the world rested on her shoulders. At the very least, she had the weight of seven other people looking up to her for guidance, for protection – as much as there was to be had, anyway. 

Because nowadays, nowhere – and no one – was ever truly safe. 

Her ragtag group had all lost people, some more than others. None of them were strangers to grief; today, though, Yaz’s was palpable. 

One year. 

Sighing, Yaz skimmed a rock across the lake she was sitting by. It was dangerous to be alone, and she knew that. But today… today, she needed it. 

Slowly, she took out a knife from her ankle holster, running her thumb over the smooth wooden surface of the handle. It was painted a rich blue, a pretty splash of colour amidst the gray that seemed to be slowly taking over the earth as more and more of it burned to the ground. 

The steel blade was on the smaller side, not quite five inches long, but wickedly sharp. Yaz pricked her finger on the end of it, staring numbly at the blood that welled up.

Sonya had been begging to be given a rifle. 

“You can carry one when you’re older,” Yaz said, not for the first time in the last couple weeks. 

“You’re acting like I’m fifteen. I’m twenty-one years old, Yaz,” her sister protested, hands on her hips. 

“You’ve also never shot a gun before,” Yaz countered. She knew that Sonya wanted to prove herself, to feel like she was helping the resistance. But it was dangerous. She couldn’t risk losing the only family she had left. 

“So teach me.” 

“Later. We can’t afford to waste the ammo.”

Sonya clenched her jaw. “You let Ryan carry a gun, and he has dyspraxia.” 

“Sonya,” Yaz said sharply. She knew Ryan’s disability was a sensitive subject for him, and as his best friend, she was quite defensive over him. “That’s enough.” 

“I can do this. You’ve seen me with my knife. How much harder can a gun be?”  

“A lot harder,” Yaz said dryly. 

“Yeah, well, maybe if you’d let me fight with you, I’d know that,” Sonya grumbled. “I wouldn’t even have to be close to the action. You could just let me hang back and snipe them from a distance.” 

“A moving target is a lot more difficult to hit than a shop mannequin, Sonya.” 

“God, you’re fucking insufferable,” Sonya snapped, spinning on her heel and heading back towards the direction of camp. 

“Sonya –” 

“Just leave me alone.” 

Yaz sighed, rubbing her face in her hands. Her sister was as headstrong as she was – and while most times Yaz admired her for it, now was one of those times it drove her crazy. 

Taking in a deep breath, Yaz carried on with her original goal for the day – checking the snares they’d set and looking for some edible berries. They’d managed to get a couple of rabbits, which Yaz knew the meat-eaters in the group would enjoy. Luckily, she’d also managed to find some blackberries that would be a nice dessert after the vegetable stew she knew Bill and Dan were planning on making. 

When she made it back to camp, the sun was lowering in the sky. She dropped the food off with Dan, heading over to the tent she shared with Sonya. 

“Sonya, I’m –” She stopped as she opened the tent, finding it empty. A sense of unease began to take root in her chest as she walked over to where Amy and Ryan were sharpening their stash of bladed weapons. 

“Hey, have you guys seen Sonya?” she asked. 

Amy furrowed her brows. “She said she was going to help you with the gathering,” the woman replied slowly. 

Yaz’s blood ran cold. She looked at Ryan, who immediately recognised that something was terribly, terribly wrong. 

“Yaz, what’s going on?” Amy asked as she looked between them, confused. 

Yaz immediately took off towards the woods, Ryan following behind her, both of them ignoring Amy’s shouts. 

“You go that way, I’ll go this way,” Yaz said as they reached the edge of the woods. 

“Yaz, it’s not safe to split up,” Ryan said.
“We’ll cover more ground that way,” Yaz insisted. “Please, Ryan.” 

Ryan pressed his lips together, nodding. “Okay.” 

Yaz started making her way through the woods, keeping her eyes peeled for any signs of Sonya. She tried to focus her hearing, pushing past the sound of birdsong and wind blowing through the branches. 

“Sonya!” Yaz shouted. Not exactly the smartest thing to do, when she didn’t know if any Cybers were nearby. 

But her sister could be in danger. 

Her heart pounding, Yaz continued hacking her way through the woods, her desperation growing by the minute. Nightfall was coming; she had to find Sonya before – 

The sound of Sonya’s scream echoed through the woods. 

Yaz quickly tore off in the direction of her voice, fear gripping her like a vise. “Sonya!” 

She heard the sound of branches breaking behind her, only sparing a cursory glance to see that it wasn’t a Cyber chasing her but Ryan, struggling to keep his balance as he ran. 

“Go!” He shouted at her. “I’ll catch up!” 

Yaz ran even faster towards Sonya, skidding to a stop as she came to the brink of a very steep bank at the edge of the woods. Beneath her, she could see the glint of a knife whose blue handle Yaz immediately recognised. 

Sonya’s knife.  

She was weaponless. 

The Cyber was an older model, one that was missing an arm. Even still, Sonya was no match for its strength; it had her firmly in its grip as it ran through the nearby meadow, her thrashing seemingly nothing but an annoyance to the creature. 

“Sonya!” Yaz cried out, and the Cyber whirled in Yaz’s direction, crouching into a defensive position. 

Time seemed to stand still as Yaz’s brain spun, trying to figure a way out of this. 

The Cyber was protecting its only weak spot, keeping Sonya in front of it and moving backwards. There was no way Yaz could get to it in time. 

If the Cyber disappeared with Sonya, she was as good as gone. Yaz had no idea where the nearest conversion camp was; by the time she might find her, it would be too late. She would be converted, forced to live out the rest of her ‘life’ a soulless monster.  

Just like their parents had been before they’d been killed in the first wave, back when there was still a military. 

She and Sonya had made a pact that day; had promised they’d never let it happen to the other. Decided that they would rather die than be turned into a Cyber.

“Yaz!” Sonya’s panic sent a deadly chill down Yaz’s spine. “Do it! Don’t let me be one of them! You have to kill me, do it, now! You promised!” 

Yaz grabbed her gun, tears streaming down her face as she pointed it at her sister. She stared down the barrel of it, bile rising in the back of her throat. The Cyber started to move backwards even faster, and Yaz knew she was running out of time. 

“Do it, Yaz! Please!” Sonya begged, barely even fighting against the Cyber anymore. 

After all, a moving target was a lot more difficult to hit. 

Yaz’s finger inched closer towards the trigger, her hand shaking as she looked at her sister. 

Her sister, who she was supposed to protect. Who she was supposed to keep safe. 

“Yaz, now!” 

Yaz’s grip on the gun weakened. 

A gunshot rang out. 

The world seemed to stop as Sonya crumpled in the Cyber’s arms, dark red blood staining the front of her shirt. Out of the corner of her eye, Yaz could see Ryan, gun still pointed in Sonya’s direction, a mixture of grief and horror on his face. 

A snarl spread across the Cyber’s face as it let Sonya fall to the ground, running towards them. 

As quickly as it stopped, the world came back into focus as a feral rage took over Yaz’s body. Dropping the gun, she grabbed a knife from her hip and started down the embankment, half-falling down it and grabbing Sonya’s knife in her other hand as she passed by the weapon. The Cyber was fast approaching as Yaz regained her balance, and with a strangled cry she ran straight towards it. 

It reached out its hand to grab her and she quickly sidestepped, sinking a knife to the hilt into one eerie silver eye and jerking downward, causing the Cyber to lose its balance. Rotating around, she took the second knife and found home in the conversion mark, a growl tearing from her throat as she twisted it even deeper, the Cyber collapsing onto the ground. 

Not even bothering to grab the knives back out, Yaz ran over to Sonya, tears streaming down her face as she pressed her hand against her stomach, trying to stop the bleeding from the gunshot wound. 

“You’re gonna be okay, Sonya,” Yaz choked out. “Do you hear me? You’re gonna be okay.” 

“Yaz,” Sonya said weakly. “I’m sorry.” 

Yaz shook her head. “Don’t. Just save your energy, okay? We’ll carry you back to camp, and Rory will patch you up.” 

“Yaz, listen to me,” Sonya said, tears falling freely. “You have to forgive yourself, okay? Don’t let this ruin you.” 

“Stop talking like you’re going to die.” 

“I think we both know I am.” 

Yaz heard the sound of footsteps approaching, jerking her head up to see Ryan, who was looking at Sonya with tears in his eyes. He dropped to his knees next to her, grabbing her bloodied hand. 

“She’s fine,” Yaz said, like if she said it enough, it would be true. “She’s fine.” 

“I’m sorry, Sonya,” Ryan whispered. “I’m so sorry.” 

Sonya gave the smallest shake of her head. “I’m glad… you did,” she said, her words sounding more like a wheeze now. She looked back towards Yaz. “I love… you.” 

“I love you, too,” Yaz said quietly, her chin quivering. Sonya smiled. 

And then she was gone. 

Yaz let out a choked sob, pulling Sonya close to her chest, burying her face in her hair as she rocked back and forth. 

“Yaz, I’m sorry, but it’s getting too dark,” Ryan said after a few minutes, looking around warily. “We don’t know if it called for backup. We need to leave.” 

“No,” Yaz said brokenly, her grip on Sonya’s body tightening. “I can’t leave her.” 

“If you don’t, there’s a good chance we’ll die, too.” Yaz looked up at Ryan’s words, seeing the anguish on his face. “Please, Yaz. I can’t lose you, too.” 

She gently laid Sonya back down, pressing one final kiss to her forehead before numbly letting Ryan help her up. They headed back to camp, stopping to grab their weapons on the way. 

When they reached the campsite, the group went silent as they saw the blood all over their clothes. 

“Yaz…” Bill was the first one brave enough to speak, her eyes filled with sadness. 

Yaz looked at all of them, her heart shattering into a million pieces as she said the words that made it real. “She’s gone.” 

“Yaz.” A familiar voice jerked Yaz back to the present, and she instinctively lifted her knife up to a defensive position. 

“Easy, it’s just me,” Ryan said with his hands in the air, standing next to her. She hadn’t even heard him approach; she’d been lucky he wasn’t a Cyber. 

In this moment, part of her felt like she wouldn’t have cared if he was. 

Yaz stayed silent, moving back to her original position and looking back out over the smooth surface of the lake. With a sigh, Ryan sat down next to her, taking a rock and trying to skim it. Instead, it plonked into the water, sending out a large ripple. 

“She tried to teach me,” he said quietly, and Yaz immediately knew who he was talking about. Sonya. “I never got the hang of it, though.” 

Yaz hummed. 

More silence. 

“How are you holding up?” Ryan asked, glancing sideways at her. 

“How do you think I’m holding up, Ryan?” Yaz asked, more sharply than she intended. Ever since the day Sonya died, their friendship had been… strained. She knew it was unfair, knew that Ryan was hurting just as much as she was. 

Alas, her heart wasn’t always in sync with her brain. 

And so she’d pushed him away, choosing to suffer alone in her grief. After all, she’d told herself, Ryan had Graham – his late nan’s husband – to help him. He didn’t need her. 

And she couldn’t face him. 

Ryan took in a deep breath. “Yeah. Right.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together, swallowing hard. “I’m sorry,” she finally said, her voice barely more than a whisper. “I know today isn’t easy for you, either.” 

“No,” Ryan agreed. “It’s not.” 

They sat again in silence for a while before Ryan spoke again. 

“Yaz, can we please talk?” 

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Yaz said flatly. 

“Yes, there is,” Ryan said, and Yaz turned to look at him, immediately on the defensive. “Please, Yaz. Stop pushing me away. Especially today.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Yaz said, more forcefully this time. “Not right now.” 

“Then when?” Ryan asked, shaking his head. “It’s been a year, Yaz, and we haven’t talked about it. You’ve barely talked to me at all. We’re both hurting, and –” 

“My sister is dead,” Yaz hissed. “Because you shot her.” 

Ryan stilled. 

Yaz looked back over the lake, her throat tightening as she fought back the tears that threatened to spill.  

“I loved her, too, Yaz.” Ryan’s words were quiet, each sounding more difficult to get out than the last. “Every day, I think about what else I could have done. Should have done. Wished that it could have been me instead. But you and I both know that she would have rather died than be converted.” He took in a deep breath. “I don’t – I can’t – blame you for not being able to pull the trigger. But please, don’t blame me for doing it for you.” 

Yaz whipped her head around to look at him, but Ryan was already getting up and walking away. She trembled, his words hitting something deep inside her. 

She hated herself. Hated herself for not keeping Sonya safe in the first place, for not having the courage to do what she needed to in the end. Ryan was right. It was so much easier to blame him instead, and she’d held on to that lifeline with a death grip. 

After all, what was one more bloodstain on her hands? 

With a sigh, Yaz slid the knife back into its holster and stood, deciding to skim one last rock before heading back to camp for dinner. 

I wish… I wish I could forgive.

Forgive Ryan. 

Forgive Sonya. 

Forgive herself. 

Chapter Text

Yaz walked back into camp, going by the dinner station Dan and Bill had rigged up. 

“Alright, Yaz?” Dan asked as he ladled some vegetable stew in a bowl for her. It was typical fare for them, made mostly of canned vegetables scavenged from abandoned houses, but Dan always did his best to doctor it up with wild onions they’d occasionally find and the like. 

“Yeah, fine,” Yaz replied. “How are we looking on supplies?” 

Dan scrunched his nose. “Need to do another run soon.”

Yaz nodded. “Okay. I’ll take someone tomorrow and head into Hebden Bridge. We haven’t seen any Cybers there on the last few scouting missions; should be easy enough to raid some cabinets.” 

“If you can hit up a pharmacy, too, I know Rory would love some prenatal vitamins for Amy. She doesn’t think it’s worth the risk, but if you’re going into town anyway…” 

Yaz smiled softly. “Yeah, course.” 

Rory had been a nurse in the Before Times, as Yaz liked to call life before the Cyber takeover. He had naturally slipped into the role of medic in their little squad, and he was especially protective of his wife — even more so now that she was about five months pregnant. 

If you asked Yaz, she would have said that the ongoing death and destruction of earth and humanity wasn’t the best climate to bring a kid into, but she knew that Amy and Rory were excited about it, even in the current circumstances. Besides, she couldn’t fault them for condoms being in short supply nowadays. 

Let people find fun where they can, and all that. 

Besides, the two of them had brought a nice balance to their little group when they joined; Amy with her bullheaded determination and Rory with his gentle kindness. They had quickly fit in with everybody – or rather, almost everybody. 

“Hey, Yaz!” 

Yaz nearly groaned at the sound of Adam’s voice. Speak of the devil.  

It was the end of the world. Yaz knew that. And she would never be one to turn away a survivor in need of help. 

But fuck, did Adam like to try her patience most days. Amy, too, was never allowed to be on watch with him at the same time. Of course, Yaz knew Amy would never do anything or endanger his life in any way, but no one wanted a repeat of what happened the first time Adam suggested that Rory couldn’t defend himself (or anyone) if a Cyber attacked. 

Turned out the fierce redhead was just as protective of her husband as he was of her, as Adam had quickly found out. That black eye had taken weeks to heal. 

“What’s up?” Yaz asked as Adam approached. 

“Are we talking about a food run soon?” he asked, looking between her and Dan. “‘Cause you said I could come on the next one.” 

Fuck. Yaz had, in fact, said that. 

Yaz bit back a sigh. “Yeah. Tomorrow morning. But if you’re gonna come along, you’d better be able to get your arse up early. We’re leaving right after dawn.” 

“Easy there, sergeant,” Adam said. “Oh, wait, you were still on probation when the world ended, weren’t you?” Yaz’s jaw clenched, but before she could respond, Adam grinned. “Jokes, Khan. Relax.” 

Yaz gave a small hum. 

“Anyways. Mind if I grab a bowl of that, Dan?” Yaz could see the stiffness with which Dan handed Adam a bowl of stew, but Adam was apparently oblivious as he walked back towards his tent with the food. 

As soon as he was out of earshot, Dan opened his mouth to speak. 

“It’s fine, Dan,” Yaz said, stopping him. “I got used to men’s insecurities a long time ago.” It was true; as a brown woman on the police force in Sheffield, it was something she’d had to come to terms with rather quickly. 

Still, it didn’t mean she liked it. At this point in time, however, it wasn’t worth putting Adam in his place. Especially if they were now to go on an expedition together the next morning. 

“Doesn’t mean it’s right,” Dan grumbled. He and Yaz were an odd pair of friends, but they’d grown rather close in the time since Dan had joined them, shortly after Ryan’s nan had died. He wasn’t quite like a father, but not exactly a brother, either. Perhaps a sort of odd uncle. Either way, Yaz was always grateful for his grounding presence. “But if you say to let it go for now, I will. Just let me know if you change your mind.” 

“You’ll be the first,” Yaz promised, a small smile on her face. 

Taking her bowl of stew, she went to a grassy area within their camp and took a seat on the ground, deciding to enjoy the last little bit of the sunset. 

It was only a few minutes later that Bill came to sit down next to her, sporting her favourite rainbow stripe tank that she’d somehow managed to hold on to throughout the last couple years. 

“Fancy seeing you here,” Bill quipped, a flirtatious tone to her voice. “Come here often?” 

“Oh, shut up,” Yaz said, rolling her eyes even as the corner of her mouth started to tug up into a smile. One thing about Bill; she was a cheeky flirt – especially with Yaz. While Yaz had briefly entertained the thought of letting things develop further than that back in the Before Times when they’d first met, she just couldn’t think of her as anything more than a friend – and even moreso now with the state the world was in. 

Still, it was nice to be appreciated, and she knew Bill was fully aware of Yaz’s feelings (or lack thereof, rather). They had an easy banter, and Yaz had come to rely on her in the last year even more than she had before. 

Bill grinned. “Girl’s gotta try.” 

Yaz hummed, her smile growing. “And that’s the best you’ve got?” 

“Oh, babe, you wouldn’t survive my full charm,” Bill said easily. “And we can’t go on without our fearless leader.” 

Yaz rolled her eyes. “Course you could. And I told you before, it’s a flat team structure.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Bill said with a dismissive wave. “You already take on the responsibilities of one even if they’re not yours to bear. You might as well accept the mantle as well.” 

Yaz scrunched her nose. “No, thank you. I already get enough shit from Adam as it is.” 

“Ugh, again?” Bill asked, rolling her eyes. 

“Yeah. Speaking of, do you want to go on a run to Hebden Bridge in the morning?” Yaz asked hopefully. At Bill’s initial you-have-got-to-be-kidding me look, Yaz tried again. “Please, Bill. I don’t wanna go alone with him. And it couldn’t hurt having an extra pair of eyes, even if everything’s been clear recently.” 

Bill sighed. “You’re so lucky I love you, Yaz.” 

Yaz grinned. “Whipped.” 

“Cheeky bastard. Maybe I won’t go.” 

“You will.” 

“Yeah, I will.” 

There was a moment of easy silence before Bill spoke again. “So,” she started hesitantly. “How are you holding up?”

 Yaz stiffened, the earlier lightness of the moment immediately gone as Yaz’s defenses rose, quick as a whip.

“Can people stop asking me that?” she asked, more sharply than she intended. 

Bill continued on, undeterred. “We’re all worried about you, Yaz.” 

“I don’t need anyone worrying about me. We’ve got plenty else to focus on.” 

Bill sighed. “Yaz… ignoring the pain doesn’t make it go away.” 

“Don’t you think I bloody know that?” Yaz asked, her throat tightening as she looked at Bill. “You said yourself earlier. I have seven people – one of them pregnant, mind you – looking to me to help keep them alive. I don’t have the luxury of wallowing any more than I already have.” 

“It’s not wallowing. It’s grieving. It’s letting yourself process so that you can learn to live with it.” 

“Didn’t realise you had become a therapist,” Yaz retorted. “There’s nothing to process. My sister’s dead, and nothing is going to bring her back. I know that. All I need is to take down Division and destroy every last fucking Cyber on this planet.” 

“And what happens after that?” Bill asked, her voice gentle as she ignored Yaz’s sarcasm and pretended she had a chance of doing just that. Yaz knew that most of her group thought she was insane; after all, if the might of the world’s militaries wasn’t enough to stop the Cybers, what chance did she have? “What happens once you don’t have anywhere left to run?” 

Yaz went silent at that, her jaw clenching as she refused to meet Bill’s gaze. After a moment, Bill sighed, apparently realising that Yaz wasn’t going to give her a response. 

“Guess I’ll see you in the morning, then,” Bill said, a quiet surrender in her tone. Yaz gave her a nod, and Bill grabbed both of their empty bowls, taking them back to the dinner station. 

Once she was out of sight, Yaz laid back onto the grass and stared up at the stars, letting out a deep sigh. She knew her friend only meant well, but right now she was definitely not in the right headspace to hear it. 

She missed her sister. 

Some days, it was easier to push it down. After all, there was a lot to deal with during the apocalypse. 

Other days, the grief felt like it was going to swallow her whole. 

Today was one of those days. 

And Bill was right – she was running from it. From the anger, from the guilt, from the devastation that felt like a deadly tidal wave. 

It should have been her. 

If only she’d been faster, if only she’d taught Sonya how to use the rifle, if only she’d kept a closer eye on her – 

If, if, if. 

Clenching her fists by her sides, Yaz focused on her breathing. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. Again. Again. Again. 

After Yaz finally managed to regulate her breathing, she reluctantly got up from the ground and started to head back to her tent, absentmindedly tracing the raised lines on her wrists, faded echoes of a time long past. Some days, she thought about how easy it would be to slip into old habits, to take this pain and give it voice where it could only hurt her. 

And then she would think of her sister, who had been the one to realise Yaz was at her lowest all those years ago and held out a steady hand. Who had called for help when Yaz had been on the side of a road, ready to end it all. Who had told her, even through the end of the world, that they could find something worth living for. Together. 

She couldn’t let her down.

Not again. 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

The next morning, Yaz was up with the sun, putting on her gear and throwing her hair into its usual braid. When she left her tent, she saw Graham looking out from his watchpost with a pair of binoculars. 

“Alright, Graham?” she asked. “Everything been good?” 

“No sign of anything but a few bats,” Graham said with a salute. 

Yaz nodded. “Good. Get some rest, yeah?” 

“I will,” Graham affirmed. “After a bit of breakfast.” 

Yaz smiled wryly. If there was one constant in this patchwork life, it was that Graham was always ready for food. In the Before Times, back when she and Ryan were best friends, she’d never known Graham to not have a cheese and pickle sarnie in his pocket. 

God, she missed cheese. It really was the little things in life. Dan had joked about finding a cow and keeping it as a pet, but Yaz didn’t want anything potentially slowing them down if they had to evacuate anywhere quickly. Because knowing herself, she would definitely get attached to said cow and be unwilling to leave it behind. 

Besides, she was pretty sure none of them actually knew how to make cheese, and it wasn’t like they could do a web search for instructions. 

Anyways. 

Yaz bid Graham goodbye before heading towards the other edge of camp, finding Bill ready and waiting for her. Adam, of course, was nowhere to be seen. 

“Still in his tent?” Yaz asked, deciding to pretend their conversation the night before had never happened.

Bill shrugged. “Probably.” 

Yaz rolled her eyes. “I’ll go get him.” 

Yaz walked over to where his tent was stationed, quickly unzipping the flap. “Wake up, Mitchell,” she said rather loudly, startling Adam, who was lying on his stomach completely nude. He shot up, quickly pulling a blanket over his bottom half. 

“What the fuck, Yaz?” Adam nearly screeched, and Yaz bit back a smug grin. 

“Told you we were leaving at first light,” she said with a shrug. 

“Can’t you, like, knock first?” Adam grumbled. “My whole arse was out.” 

“Trust me, I’m not interested in looking,” Yaz said dryly, not even bothering to mention the fact it was rather impossible to knock on nylon. “Get dressed. We leave in five minutes.” 

Adam muttered something under his breath, but Yaz was already standing up and heading back towards Bill. 

Bill raised an eyebrow as Yaz approached. “Hope there weren’t any Cybers around to hear all that racket.” 

“Chances of them being this far out are slim,” Yaz said dismissively. “Besides, it was so worth it for the look on his face.” 

Yaz could see Bill holding back a grin, but she was unsuccessful. “Yeah, okay. I believe that.” 

Surprisingly, Adam joined them pretty quickly, and they set off on their hour and a half trek to Hebden Bridge. It was a long walk done mostly in silence, everyone always on high alert for Cybers especially as they grew closer to town. 

So far, just like in all their scouting missions, the place seemed deserted. To be fair, it wasn’t the most populated city even in the Before Times, but now it echoed with emptiness. 

They passed by several brick buildings with shattered windows, remnants of the panic that had occurred when the Cybers had started to take over and governments had started to crumble. A lot of the town had already been scavenged through, but there were still some cans of soup and fruits to be found. Yaz tried not to think about what they would do once they had well and truly run out of reserves here. Eventually, they would have to try for a bigger city with much more supplies – which meant all that much more danger, from Cybers and bandits alike. 

When they passed the pharmacy, Yaz motioned for Bill and Adam to stop and keep watch. She gave a cursory peek through one of the shattered windows, seeing nothing out of the ordinary. She opened the busted door, walking over to the vitamin section and grabbing all the containers of vitamins they had left. After all, it couldn’t hurt if the rest of the group took some, too. God knows they weren’t getting all the nutrition they needed from canned soup. 

Walking through the aisles, she grabbed a few other things she thought they could perhaps use more of soon – cold medicine (out of date by this point, but it was better than nothing), pads, tampons, some razors. The boys had complained about feeling rather scruffy recently; it couldn’t hurt to boost morale by helping them feel cleaner. There was only so much a pair of scissors could do, even though Graham had taken quite well to being the resident barber of the group. Yaz had even let him trim her hair a couple of times. 

She was just heading back to the others when she heard a scream. She immediately dropped her bag and started to run when she heard a faint noise behind her. She whipped around to see a Cyber that had apparently come in through the back and was now reaching for her. 

Ducking down, she reached for her ankle holster and pulled out Sonya’s knife as she twisted her body to escape the Cyber’s grasp. The Cyber, having lost the element of surprise, snarled at Yaz and lunged for her again. It was always a deadly dance with a Cyber; they wanted you alive, but the conversion process still worked as long as your heart was beating when you were attached to the chamber. 

Yaz dodged its attacks, looking for her chance to strike. Finally, she managed to twist around it and sink her knife into its neck, yanking it back out as the Cyber fell to the ground. 

Only sparing a quick glance to make sure there wasn’t another one coming through the back, Yaz ran out the front door, her chest heaving. 

Outside were four more Cybers; Adam was currently engaging two of them in a fight, clearly tiring out. 

The other two – 

“ Bill! ” Yaz screamed. 

Not again.

The other two Cybers were dragging Bill towards an alleyway, seemingly barely affected by her thrashing. 

Images of Sonya flashed through her mind, and Yaz found herself paralysed with fear as the memories started to overtake her.

One of the Cybers raised its arm, and Yaz’s heart leapt into her throat when she realised that it had a weapon – and had clearly decided Yaz was too much of a risk to the specimen they currently had. She tried to move out of the path of danger, but the searing pain of a laser grazing her side had her falling to the ground in agony. 

She heard Bill cry out her name, and then her vision went dark. 

Chapter Text

When Yaz’s eyes slowly began to flutter open, she was greeted by the sight of concerned hazel eyes and a tousled blonde bob that glowed like a halo in the sunlight behind her. 

Fucking hell. Was she dead? She was pretty sure that angels weren’t supposed to look like this. Also, she shouldn’t still be in so much pain. So maybe she wasn’t dead. Then who the fuck – 

“Who the fuck are you?” Yaz tried to sit up, to move away from this stranger even as her vision kept blurring from pain. “Where –”

Bill. Bill had been in the grasp of Cybers. Adam had been losing a fight with them, too. 

“Easy, Yaz.” She heard Bill’s voice coming from close by. “I’m here. So’s Adam. We’re safe.” 

Yaz took a few shallow breaths, letting her vision focus as Bill and Adam became visible behind the stranger. 

“How…” Yaz trailed off, wincing as another sharp stab of pain shot up her side. 

“Try not to move too much,” the blonde woman said, causing Yaz’s gaze to jerk back to her. In her hand was a syringe and needle that she was currently capping. “It’ll take a few minutes for the painkillers to kick in.” 

“Pain –” Yaz started, her brows furrowing. “How the hell do you have that? Again, who the fuck are you?” 

“The one who saved our arses,” Bill said before the blonde could speak. “I told her to do it, Yaz. You looked in bad shape.” 

“Still do,” Adam said under his breath, and Yaz glared at him. He raised his hands in surrender. “Just saying. We need to get you back to camp.” 

Yaz looked between all of them, still wary. 

“I can carry her,” the stranger said, looking at Bill. 

Bill raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? It’s a long walk from here.” 

“I’m stronger than I look. We can just take a few breaks along the way.”

“Nobody is carrying me,” Yaz interrupted. “And I’m not letting a stranger into our camp.” 

“Yaz, she saved our lives.” Bill’s face was earnest, sincere. “If she hadn’t been around and taken out one of the Cybers that had me, I’d be one of them by now. Adam, too.” 

Throughout all of this, the blonde woman was still just kneeling next to Yaz, her eyes wide as she looked between her and Bill. 

Yaz looked warily at the stranger. “And what exactly were you doing there? We’ve been keeping an eye on that place for weeks and haven’t ever seen you before.” 

“Same as you, I’d wager,” the woman said dryly. “Getting supplies. I’ve just been travelling on my own, got into the area yesterday.” 

“You’ve been out there on your own?” Yaz wasn’t sure whether to be impressed or suspicious. “And you’ve made it this long?” 

“I’m quite resourceful,” the woman said, a challenging glint in her eye as she raised an eyebrow. 

“And how am I supposed to know you’re not one of those bandits trying to sneak into our camp and then alert your buddies of our location so you can rob us blind?”

The blonde blinked at her. “Well. I suppose you don’t know.” 

“So I’m just supposed to trust you?” 

“Yaz –” Bill started, stopping when Yaz glared at her. 

“You haven’t even told me your name,” Yaz continued, looking back at the blonde. 

“It’s Thirteen.” 

“Thirteen? What kind of name is that?” 

“It’s mine,” the woman – Thirteen , apparently – said defensively. 

“It’s just like that chick from House back in the day,” Adam said, his face also shifting into a defensive expression when Yaz and Bill looked at him. “What? She was hot.” 

“You’ve gotta stop referring to women as chicks, mate,” Bill said, and Adam rolled his eyes. “Anyways. We really need to get back to camp or everyone’s gonna be worried sick. C’mon, Yaz. She wouldn’t have saved your arse – or used valuable medical supplies to help you feel better – if she wasn’t a good sort.” 

Yaz looked warily at Thirteen, who was watching her with a neutral expression. “How’d you know how to use that stuff, anyway? You a doctor or something?” 

“Or something,” Thirteen said with a shrug. “I know lots of things.” 

Yaz’s eyes narrowed. She wanted to push further, wanted to question the blonde more, but she had to admit that the injection Thirteen gave her was helping. 

“You’re lucky I don’t have any medicinal allergies,” Yaz huffed. 

Thirteen scrunched her nose, and Yaz didn’t like how adorable she immediately found it. Even if she was proper annoyed at the moment. 

“Yeah, that’s fair. Sorry ‘bout that. You just seemed like you were in a lot of pain.” 

Yaz felt herself soften a little bit. “Yeah. Thanks.” 

Thirteen gave her a small smile that made Yaz’s heart trip over itself for a second. 

God, what the hell was in that syringe? 

“Bill, can you help me up?” Yaz asked as she started to shift. The painkiller was definitely helping, but fuck did her side hurt. 

When she had finally managed to stand, leaning against a nearby tree, she took a few shallow breaths, biting her lower lip as she waited for the pain to subside. 

“Right,” she said once she was sure she could get the words out without her voice wavering. “If you’re going to be coming to camp with us, I need to see the back of your neck, Thirteen.” 

“Yaz, you’ve seen her eyes,” Bill started, and Yaz silenced her with a look. 

“How do we know Division hasn’t figured a way to make the Cybers look even more human?” Yaz argued. “We need to keep the camp safe, Bill.” 

Bill sighed. “Okay. You’re right.” She looked at Thirteen apologetically. “It’s nothing personal, honest. You know how it is out here.” 

“Of course,” Thirteen said, nodding. “I’d be surprised if you weren’t this cautious.” 

She walked over to Yaz, turning around and leaning her head slightly forward. Suddenly feeling nervous, Yaz tentatively reached out and pulled down at the collar of her shirt, her fingers grazing along Thirteen’s cool, pale skin. 

She could have sworn she heard Thirteen’s breath hitch at the contact, and the thought triggered a fluttering feeling in her stomach. 

Enough.  

“She’s clear,” Yaz said, removing her hand once she saw no sign of a conversion scar. Thirteen immediately took a few steps away, her cheeks looking slightly pink as she averted Yaz’s gaze. 

Yaz looked between Bill and Adam, the latter of whom was watching Thirteen with an obvious interest that made Yaz want to wrinkle her nose in distaste. Not because she had any interest in the blonde herself, of course. It was just that Adam was so… Adam. 

Honestly, she was pretty sure Thirteen would eat him alive if he tried. Which, maybe – 

“So. Home?” Bill asked, and Yaz pressed her lips together before nodding. 

She started to take a step, glaring at Thirteen when she made to step closer towards her, a worried furrow to her brow. 

“Yaz, mate,” Bill said, her face also full of concern as Yaz grimaced while trying to take another step. 

Yaz clenched her jaw, assessing the situation. No matter what, she wasn’t letting anyone fucking carry her, that was for damn sure. But maybe – maybe – it might be helpful to lean against someone while they walked. 

Well. She definitely wasn’t going to lean on Adam, so that left Thirteen and Bill. Bill would be the obvious choice, since she was one of her best mates and she trusted her.

But that would also mean letting Thirteen be responsible for covering their arses. And while she had supposedly saved the day back in Hebden Bridge, Yaz hadn’t seen anything for herself. And she still didn’t know the woman’s true motives. 

“You’re not bloody carrying me,” Yaz said stiffly, looking at Thirteen. “But if you… if you wouldn’t mind. Maybe. I could lean on you a bit.” 

Thirteen nodded. “Sure.” 

“Adam, you lead the way,” Yaz continued. “And Bill, watch our backs.” 

After waiting for their affirmatives, Yaz looked back at Thirteen. The blonde hesitantly took a step closer to Yaz, then another. 

“I’m not going to bite you,” Yaz muttered. 

“Can you blame me for being concerned about that possibility?” Thirteen answered, a wry hint to her tone. “Here.” 

Yaz’s indignant huff morphed into a grunt of pain as Thirteen maneuvered her around, trying to find the best position for them to walk. 

“Sorry,” Thirteen murmured. “I’m trying to be as gentle as I can.” 

“S’fine,” Yaz said through gritted teeth. “Let’s just start moving.” 

The walk back home was certainly a far slower affair than their journey this morning, and Bill more than once had to remind Adam to stop getting so far ahead. 

Yaz tried valiantly to lean on Thirteen as little as possible, determined to try and do this as much on her own as she could. The farther they got, though, the more she found herself unconsciously leaning closer, resting more weight on the blonde and inhaling the scent of peppermint and… was that engine oil? Whatever it was, and however she had come to smell like that… it was nice. 

She could feel Thirteen’s toned muscle underneath her shirt – the woman hadn’t been lying when she said she was strong. The only sign of exertion was the flush to her cheeks and a thin sheen of sweat on her forehead. 

God, it had really been too long since she’d been this physically close to another person. All she could feel was the woman’s arm around her waist, being careful not to brush up against the wound the laser graze had left behind. All she could see was the sharp line of her jaw, the way her blonde bob framed her face. And those eyes, hazel with flecks of gold in them in the sunlight. 

“Why’re you starin’ at me?” 

Yaz blinked, snapping her gaze back forward. “I wasn’t.” 

“You were.” 

“Wasn’t,” Yaz muttered under her breath. “Just lookin’.” 

“Do you like the way I look?” 

Normally, the words would have come across flirtatious, maybe even arrogant. As it was, there was only a genuine curiosity behind Thirteen’s eyes as she met Yaz’s gaze, and Yaz couldn’t find it in her to lie. 

“Suppose you’re not bad to look at, no,” Yaz mumbled. 

Thirteen hummed, a small smile on her face. “That’s nice.” 

Not bad to look at, no, but there certainly was something… odd about the blonde. She looked to be about Yaz’s age, and yet somehow acted as if she’d never had anyone compliment her like that before. 

And c’mon. No bloody way could that be the case, much as Yaz didn’t like to admit it. The woman was stunning, even if she was strange. 

“Not too long now,” Adam said, turning and walking backwards for a moment as he called out to them. “Sure you don’t need me to take over, Thirteen?” 

Yaz tried not to roll her eyes. She could outlift Adam any day when she wasn’t injured, and she was sure Thirteen could as well. 

“I’ve got it, thanks,” Thirteen replied politely. 

“Cool. Just let me know,” Adam said with a wink before turning back around. 

Yaz watched as Thirteen scrunched her nose, secretly grateful that she didn’t seem to like Adam’s attention. Not that it mattered. She just liked being right in her suspicions, that was all. 

“Pretty sure he likes the way you look, too,” Yaz said casually, her voice low so he didn’t overhear. 

Thirteen’s brows furrowed as she considered it. “I don’t think his opinion matters as much to me.” 

Yaz felt her heart skip a beat at her wording. As much. As much as Yaz’s opinion? Was she reading too much into it? There was no hint on Thirteen’s face, no sign that she was searching for Yaz’s reaction. It was as if she was just stating that the sky was blue. 

Bloody hell, Khan. Get a grip.  

They continued their journey in silence, Yaz refocusing her efforts on trying to keep from pulling at her side too much as they walked (and to not think about how much of a bastard that was going to be to heal). 

They had just gotten within sight of camp when Rory and Ryan came running up to them, wary expressions on their faces as they looked at Thirteen. 

“Guys? What happened?” Rory asked, his expression morphing into one of concern as he took in Yaz’s awkward position. “Yaz? Are you hurt?” 

“Cyber laser to the side,” Bill explained, and Rory winced. “Doctor Thirteen here gave her a painkiller injection, but we didn’t have time to do the full checkup.” 

Rory looked at Thirteen, his eyes narrowing. “Doctor?” 

“Don’t worry, she’s not gonna take your job,” Bill teased. “But she has been helping Yaz the whole way back, and I think we could all use a rest.” 

“Sorry,” Ryan said, looking between Bill and Yaz. “But are we just…” he trailed off, gaze flickering over to Thirteen. 

“Hazel eyes and no conversion scar,” Yaz said, and she felt Thirteen stiffen a bit beside her. “She’s a survivor, like us. And she saved our lives back there. We’ll have a meal and a rest, and then we can talk about it. Okay?” 

Ryan pressed his lips together. “Okay.” 

“I’d like to have a look at you before you go to your tent,” Rory said to Yaz. “We need to be careful of infection.” 

Yaz sighed. All she wanted was to lay down and sleep for approximately seven hours. “Fine.” 

When they walked into camp, Yaz still leaning against Thirteen, she could feel everyone’s eyes on them. It had been quite some time since Amy and Rory had joined them; they hadn’t seen many survivors at all since then, so she couldn’t blame them for being wary. 

After all, she still had a lot of questions for Thirteen. But she couldn’t deny that the woman had been helpful so far. 

“I know everyone has questions,” Yaz said, making sure everyone could hear her. “We’ll have a meeting tonight and discuss them all, I promise. But right now, I need some food and some rest. Please.” 

After she saw nods or heard affirmations from everyone, Yaz let Thirteen take her over to Rory’s first aid station and help her sit down on the foldable beach chair Rory used as a makeshift cot. Adam, of course, was following behind them like a puppy dog, much to Yaz’s annoyance, especially because she knew it wasn’t due to him giving a shit about Yaz’s well-being. 

“Should I –” Thirteen started, shifting nervously. 

“I’ll show you where the food is,” Adam said eagerly. 

There it is.  

Thirteen looked at Yaz, who gave a half-shrug. “I’ll be alright.” 

“Right,” Thirteen said. “Okay.” 

Yaz watched them walk away, averting her gaze when Thirteen looked back at her. 

“So,” Rory said, drawing Yaz’s attention to him. “What happened?” 

Yaz pressed her lips together. “I don’t know. Everything had been clear. I was grabbing supplies in the pharmacy, and I heard a shout. Before I could get out there, a Cyber came from behind me. By the time I could kill it and get back outside, they were taking Bill. Adam wasn’t far behind.” 

Rory motioned to her shirt, silently asking permission to take a look at the wound. Yaz nodded, wincing as he lifted the tattered fabric up. “And then? When did this… what did Bill say her name was? Thirteen?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Odd name.” 

“I know.” Yaz looked in the direction she had gone in, but the woman was out of sight by this point. “I don’t know what happened, exactly. After I got hit, I passed out. Woke up to her lookin’ over me. According to Bill, she took out one of the Cybers that had her and saved their lives.” 

Rory started disinfecting the wound, and Yaz grit her teeth to stop from making a noise. Fuck , that shit hurt. 

“And she just happened to be there? When we’ve not seen evidence of anyone else out there for weeks?” 

Yaz sighed. “Look. I’m not saying I trust her. I don’t. But the fact of the matter is, she helped us. We owe her at least a meal and a chance to speak.” 

Rory pressed his lips together. “Yeah. I get you. I’m just worried.” 

“I know,” Yaz said quietly. “Trust me. I won’t make any decisions that I think might endanger this camp or anyone in it.” 

Rory looked at her intently. “I do. Trust you, I mean.” 

Yaz’s answering smile twisted into a grimace as Rory placed a bandage over her wound. “Fucking hell, Williams.” 

“Sorry,” Rory said, wincing. “Maybe Thirteen has more of that painkiller.” 

Yaz shook her head. “I’ll be fine. No need to waste valuable supplies.” She nodded towards the direction she’d last seen Bill holding the supply bags. “Speaking of. Got a bunch of vitamins and stuff.” 

Rory smiled gratefully. “Thanks, Yaz.” 

“Anytime.” She started trying to move before falling back and leaning against the chair. “Think I might just… sit here for a sec, if that’s okay.” 

“Yeah, yeah, take your time,” Rory said. “I’m gonna go check on Amy. I’ll be back in a bit.” 

Yaz gave him a thumbs up, her eyes fluttering closed as he walked away. Just a few minutes of rest, then she’d get up. Absolutely. 

Chapter Text

“Thirteen.” 

Thirteen’s head snapped up, her eyes wide as she tried to keep her breathing quiet. She could hear the sound of approaching footsteps from her hiding spot behind the velvet curtain, and she did her best not to move. 

It was the day of the week she looked forward to the least – her checkup, as her mother called it. They’d used to be more frequent, and she supposed she should be grateful that she didn’t have to do them as often, but it was hard to think about that when they always ended with her writhing in pain. 

Her heart jumped into her throat as she heard those footsteps start moving quickly towards her, followed by a hand jerking the curtain open. 

“Thirteen,” her mother said, her disapproval apparent in both her face and voice. “What are you doing here?”

“Playing hide and seek?” Thirteen tried, already seeing that her mother was not amused. 

Tecteun hummed. “Right. Definitely not avoiding your checkup, I’m sure.” 

“Why would I do that?” Thirteen asked weakly, shrinking into herself. She knew her mother hated it; Thirteen was already a rather scrawny, raggedy-looking kid, even if she was physically strong. Her mother always said that making herself small made her look weak. And weakness was something that Tecteun would not tolerate. 

Tecteun’s eyes narrowed, and Thirteen forced herself to stand up a little straighter. 

“Come,” her mother said, nodding her head towards the nearby lab. “It’s time.” 

Thirteen followed along obediently behind her, wishing once again that her mother would simply take her hand. Maybe if she did, Thirteen wouldn’t feel so afraid. 

Another weakness. 

The lab was as cold and clinical as the rest of the building, all white walls and sterile equipment. Thirteen swallowed hard, taking in a deep breath as she went to get in her chair, forcing herself to lean back against it. 

Her mother readied her equipment, and Thirteen tried not to flinch at the sight of the sharp objects. 

“It hurts.” 

She hated how weak she sounded, how vulnerable. 

“I know,” her mother said, but there wasn’t much of an apology in her voice. “You know why we have to do this, Thirteen. You’re going to be the start of a better world.” 

I don’t want that, Thirteen wanted to say. I just want to stop hurting.  

Instead, she closed her eyes, going to that place in her mind that she didn’t tell anyone about. In it, she lay in a meadow, feeling the slight prickle of grass on her skin. She could smell flowers, see the clouds in the sky. Beside her, she could feel another presence – who, she did not know. It didn’t matter. All she knew was that the person beside her was safe, loving, kind. Hesitantly, she stretched out her hand, inching it closer between them. After a moment, the person’s fingertips brushed against her own, and Thirteen shivered. 

The touch was gentle, warm, reassuring. Everything she’d ever wanted, and everything she’d never gotten. 

In it, she couldn’t hear the sound of a little girl’s screams. Couldn’t feel the fire racing through her veins. Couldn’t smell the stench of blood as it spilled from her, couldn’t feel her skin starting to fuse itself back together. Over and over again, until it finally ceased. 

“Thirteen.” Tecteun’s voice was distant, muddled as Thirteen fought to come back to full consciousness. 

Thirteen blinked her eyes open slowly, wincing at the harsh light of the room. 

“Adequate,” her mother said as she wrote a few more notes down in her notebook. “You may go rest now, Thirteen.” 

Thirteen started to sit up, her vision going dark for a second. Even though her body healed at a rate faster than any human, it still would take awhile for her to feel back to her normal self. She’d been lucky this time, as well; there had been times she’d been brought to the brink of death just to see what she could come back from. It seemed that this time, her mother was after some sort of other data. 

Pressing her lips together, determined not to show any further weakness, Thirteen forced herself to stand up, taking a second to make sure she wasn’t going to fall over. She glanced at Tecteun, but her mother was paying no attention to her. 

Swallowing hard, she started the walk back to her bedroom. When she finally collapsed onto her bed, she stared at the ceiling, a lone tear falling from the corner of her eye. 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

Thirteen tried not to keep looking back towards where she’d left Yaz. There was no reason to, logically. She was fully capable of handling herself in this camp, and the other woman was going to be fine. She’d made sure of it. 

She wasn’t sure what it was about the brunette that had captivated her so fully, but she knew that it was something to be wary of. She had a mission to complete; she couldn’t let anything get in the way of that. 

“Yeah, so this is my station,” Adam said beside her, and Thirteen tried to focus on what he was saying. “I’m in charge of comms. We don’t have much, and we try to conserve batteries when we can, but we do check some standard radio frequencies fairly often to see if there are other survivors. That’s how we found Rory and Amy.” She noticed him make a face when he said those names, and Thirteen took a mental note about that. “We also have some of these walkie-talkies we found at an old construction site. Don’t get too much distance out of them, but it’s enough when we’re splitting off to do some recon around a new town or something.” 

She could see him puff out his chest the tiniest bit as he spoke, as if she should be impressed. 

In a way, she supposed she was. Her mother hadn’t given her a lot of information on how these rebels were surviving, only that they needed to be studied and converted. She wasn’t sure what she’d expected, but it certainly hadn’t been this. 

“That’s pretty neat,” Thirteen finally said, which Adam seemed to appreciate. She thought about what Yaz had said earlier – how Adam probably liked the way she looked. For some reason, it hadn’t inspired the same fluttering in her chest that it had when Yaz had said those words. 

“Yeah. Pretty important stuff,” Adam said with a cocky shrug. “Anyway, I’ll take you to meet Dan and get you some food. He and Bill are the cooks of the camp.” 

Dan seemed nice enough, albeit cautious, which seemed par for the course with most everyone in the camp. Adam quickly introduced her to everyone else, giving her brief overviews of their general tasks in the camp. She knew Rory was in charge of first aid, since she’d dropped Yaz off with him. His wife, Amy, was about five months pregnant (which Thirteen was sure her mother would find interesting) and in charge of keeping their weapons sharp and clean, along with Ryan, the other man who had met them with Rory. Graham was Ryan’s grandfather, and mostly worked with maps when they were going to new places. 

And, of course, there was Yaz. Their fearless leader. Adam didn’t say much about her, much to Thirteen’s disappointment. 

“So, what brings you here?” Adam said as he walked her around the rest of camp, showing her their security outposts and such.  

Thirteen furrowed her brows, confused. “I helped get Yaz here. You know that.” 

“Well, yeah. Don’t call her Yaz, by the way. That’s for friends. She might rip you a new one. It’s Yasmin.” 

Were they friends? It didn’t seem like Yaz – or rather Yasmin, apparently – liked Adam very much, and he used her nickname. 

Not that it mattered. She wasn’t here to truly make friends with Yasmin – or any of them. She was here to find out how much information they knew and get them to trust her, so that she could get them to Arcadia for her mother’s research. 

“But what I mean is, why were you around here in the first place?” 

“Like I told Yasmin, I were just going through the area,” Thirteen answered. 

“Heading where?” 

“Wherever the Cybers aren’t,” Thirteen said dryly. Pursing her lips, she decided to test the waters. “Actually, I was searching for a compass that’s said to lead the holder to Arcadia.” 

A lie, of course. She knew exactly where the compass was. And while her mother hadn’t known exactly where the survivors were hiding out at, she’d had a general idea of where they might be – hence why Thirteen had been dropped off relatively nearby. She’d been walking for maybe a week when she’d found them. 

Where she’d been dropped off from … if only she could remember. Every time she tried to think about how to get back home, her brain would go all fuzzy. All she knew was that she needed to get them to find the compass, to get them to follow it to Arcadia. Which was definitely not home. 

“Arcadia? That’s a myth,” Adam scoffed. “There is no safe haven for us.” 

“I choose to believe otherwise.” 

Adam opened his mouth as if to speak again when Thirteen heard footsteps approaching. 

“Boss wants to see her, Adam.” She turned to see Bill and felt a sense of relief. Adam seemed like a nice enough person, but his mere presence felt exhausting to her. She wasn’t completely sure why. “And she asked for you to do a walkaround of the perimeter before reporting back to the campfire.” 

Adam rolled his eyes, and Thirteen’s eyes narrowed a bit. Clearly, Adam wasn’t the biggest fan of Yasmin being in charge. 

Interesting. 

“See you around, then, Thirteen,” Adam said, shooting her a wink as he started heading towards the perimeter. 

She heard Bill let out a soft snort as Adam got out of earshot and they started walking back towards the center of camp. “God, I’m so glad I’m a lesbian. Not that women can’t be exhausting in their own ways. But it’s just not the same.” She looked at Thirteen curiously. “What about you? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I’m just nosy.” 

“I… I don’t know,” Thirteen answered truthfully. It wasn’t like she’d really met many people in her life to begin with; even then, romance was something she’d only read about in books – and not very often, as her mother usually deemed books like that as nonsense and a waste of both their time. 

Bill hummed. “That’s fair. I had a mate whose dad realised he was gay when he was in his 60s or so. Everyone has their own timeline for figuring themselves out. Course, it’s not like it really matters when the majority of humanity has been wiped out.” 

Thirteen felt a flicker of remorse at the sadness which crept into Bill’s tone. She hadn’t known what the earth had been like before; she’d never been allowed out in it. But there was an ache in Bill’s voice that spoke of a deep loss. 

And here she was, tasked to lead this group to their demise. 

The rest of their walk back was rather quiet. Instead of the first aid station, Bill led them to what she assumed was Yasmin’s tent, given that the woman was sitting in a folding chair in front of it. 

“Thank you, Bill,” Yasmin said, and Bill nodded before walking away. Yasmin gestured to a second chair across from hers, and Thirteen anxiously took a seat. 

“So, Adam gave you the tour?” Yasmin asked, and Thirteen nodded. “How was that?” 

“Fine,” Thirteen said with a shrug. “Pretty sure I remember everyone’s names.” She definitely did; after all, she had a near perfect memory. But Yasmin didn’t need to know that. 

“And Adam was nice to you?” 

Thirteen tried not to snort. “Yeah.” 

Yasmin nodded. “Good.” 

There was a moment of silence and Thirteen hesitated a moment, pressing her lips together before finally deciding to just come out with it. “Adam said only your friends call you Yaz.” 

Yasmin looked at her, tilting her head. “Right.” 

“But he calls you Yaz.” 

Yasmin stiffened. “What are you saying, Thirteen?” 

“Just that you don’t seem to like him very much, that’s all.” And he definitely doesn’t like you.  

The woman blinked at her a few times. “You’re rather blunt, aren’t you?” she asked, and Thirteen couldn’t tell if she was offended or amused. 

“Is that a bad thing?” Thirteen asked, her brows furrowing. 

Yasmin considered it. “I don’t think so,” she said. “I rather like it. Just maybe be careful who you say certain things around. Keep it to your friends, you know.” 

Thirteen felt a strange flutter in her chest. She wasn’t sure why, and it went against every instruction that her mother had given her, but she liked having Yasmin’s approval. 

She hummed. There were so many intricacies when it came to social situations, she was quickly discovering. It was overwhelming. 

“I’m calling you Yaz,” Thirteen said, more forcefully than she intended. “‘Cause we’re friends now.” 

Yaz simply stared at her for a moment before the corner of her mouth tugged up in a rueful smile. “Well. Suppose you did save my life.” 

Thirteen smiled then, too, that strange feeling in her chest again. 

“Everyone’s gathering at the centre of camp for the meeting,” Yaz said after a moment of silence. 

“Right,” Thirteen said slowly. The meeting that would decide if she were allowed to stay with them. 

If she were able to continue out her mission the way her mother had intended. 

“Do you want to stay?” Yaz asked, her voice neutral. 

Thirteen swallowed, her answer coming from a place not borne of logic and manipulation, but of genuine sincerity. “Yes.” 

Yaz hummed. She slowly stood, wincing as the movement clearly pulled at her injury. Having a feeling that her help wouldn’t be appreciated at the moment, Thirteen stood back. “Let’s go, then.” 

She followed Yaz to where the group had gathered, including Adam, who had apparently finished his walkaround. 

“Alright, then,” Yaz said as Thirteen stood awkwardly at her side, slightly behind her. “Everyone’s had a chance to meet Thirteen. As you might have heard, things went a bit haywire in Hebden Bridge and she saved our lives.” 

There were a few nods around the group, and Thirteen could feel several pairs of eyes on her. 

“I know it’s been awhile since we’ve come across any other survivors, much less added anyone to our group,” Yaz started. “And I hope you all know that I would never, ever willingly endanger the lives of anyone here. That being said… I think we owe it to Thirteen to let her stay with us. If she wants. But it’s not just up to me.” She looked around the group, making eye contact with everyone. She was a fierce creature to behold, even with the slight hunch to her posture as she tried not to aggravate her wound. 

She was mesmerising. 

“Thirteen? Do you have anything to say?” Yaz’s question jerked Thirteen’s attention back to the matter at hand, and she tried to ignore the flush she could feel rising to her cheeks. 

“Um, just that I’ve really enjoyed meeting everyone here,” Thirteen said. “And it’s been nice just being around other people, even if it’s only been for this little while.” 

And, Thirteen realised, that wasn’t a lie. She liked being around humans. It felt… nice. 

“I vote she stays,” Bill said, and Thirteen gave her a small smile. “It’ll be nice to have someone else to help protect us, especially with Amy being out of commission soon.” 

“I can still outshoot you in my sleep, Potts,” Amy fired back, even though there was no anger Thirteen could hear in her voice. She looked at Thirteen. “Can’t say I trust you, but I’m not opposed to you being here. For a while, at least.” 

“Rory?” Yaz asked. The nurse looked at her, a solemn expression on his face. 

“I trust you, Yaz.” 

Yaz went around the circle, and everyone gave their (some more hesitant than others) approval. The last to give his opinion was Ryan, and Thirteen couldn’t help but notice the tension between him and Yaz. 

“I trust you,” he said, echoing Rory’s earlier sentiment. The words seemed to hit Yaz harder than Thirteen thought they normally would; she could see the tiniest flinch in Yaz’s expression. 

“It’s settled, then.” Yaz turned to Thirteen. “You have a place here with us, if you want it. For now, at least.” 

Thirteen nodded. “I’d like that. Thank you.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together. “I think we have a spare blanket or two somewhere, but there’s not an extra tent. We can go looking for one on our next supply run, but –” 

“You can stay with me, if you want,” Adam said, and Thirteen tried not to recoil at the thought. 

“That’s okay,” she said politely before Yaz could respond. “I don’t sleep much, anyway. And I like being under the stars.” 

Yaz nodded. “Alright, then.” She looked back at the group. “Me and Rory will be on first watch tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll figure out new schedules and all of that. In the meantime, get a good night’s rest.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

“Contact.”  

Thirteen laid in her light sleeping bag, the blankets Yaz had given her a warm addition as she stared at the night sky, waiting for her mother’s response. After only a few moments, it came, accompanied by a faint buzzing in her ears.

“Contact.”  

“I’ve found a group. Eight humans, one of them pregnant.” 

“Excellent. And do you think you’ll be able to get them to look for the compass? To get them to find Arcadia?” 

Thirteen swallowed hard. “Yes. It will take time, of course.”

“Of course.” A pause. “Do try to get them there before the child is born, Thirteen. A fetus would provide immeasurable help to our research.” 

‘Our’ research. As if Thirteen had ever had any choice in the matter. 

Of course, she couldn’t let her mother know how her thoughts strayed. 

“I will try, Mother.” Thirteen hesitated. “It might be easier if I knew where Arcadia was. Why must we find the compass? And why can’t I remember how to get back home afterwards?” 

“You’ll remember when you need to.” Tecteun’s voice was dismissive. “It’s for your own good that you have as little information as possible. I’ll make sure you get home safe, Thirteen. Don’t worry. Just get them there.” 

Contact broken. 

Chapter Text

Thirteen had settled in rather quickly, much to Yaz’s surprise. 

In the two weeks that had passed since she’d joined them, she’d pretty much won over everyone in the camp – not least because of her willingness to take the graveyard watch shifts, since apparently she “didn’t need as much sleep” to function properly. Since Yaz usually didn’t sleep well anyway, she ended up joining her most nights. 

They didn’t always have much to talk about; Thirteen was rather quiet when it came to talking about her past. Not that Yaz could say anything. She didn’t offer up any information about hers, either. It was easier that way. 

Instead, they would mostly sit in silence, the sound of owls and nocturnal creatures scurrying around in the background. That, and the sound of Dan and Graham’s snores, occasionally. 

Honestly, it were a wonder no Cybers or bandits had found them by now on account of that alone. 

It was strangely comfortable. 

Thirteen was an odd sort, that much was for sure, but she had an awkward sort of charm about her that drew Yaz in (even though she would absolutely deny it if she were asked). 

Simply put, she liked being around her. 

“Thirteen?”

“Hmm?” 

The moon was full and bright above them as they sat in their little watchtower Dan and Ryan had built, watching over the expanse of land surrounding them. Yaz had always wondered if it was too risky, being so out in the open – but they were a long walk away from any town, and at least this way they could see anyone coming from (almost literally) a mile away. 

“Why did you save us?” 

Yaz hadn’t realised how much the question had been plaguing her until it had left her lips. 

Thirteen looked at her, brows furrowed. “What do you mean?” 

Yaz held her gaze. “I’m assuming you heard Bill’s scream. And you know what the world’s like right now, that there would either be Cybers or humans who didn’t care if you ended up dead. But you still came to help.” It was an act of kindness, something that Yaz hadn’t seen from anyone not in her camp for a very long time. “Why?” 

Thirteen stared at her for a moment, as if she were genuinely considering the question. “I just…” she paused, pressing her lips together. “I were just doin’ what I could. When people need help, I never refuse.” 

The words sounded as much like a realisation of sorts as they did a vow, and Yaz found herself even more curious about this mysterious stranger that had practically fallen from the sky into their laps. 

“You’re something else, you know that?” Yaz asked wryly. 

Thirteen tilted her head, an almost sad sort of expression on her face. “I don’t want to be.” 

Yaz shook her head. “No, it’s… it’s not a bad thing,” she said gently. “All of this ruin, and it’s only made you kind. That’s special.” 

Thirteen looked back out towards the stars, as if the praise was too much for her. 

“Sorry,” Yaz muttered. “Didn’t mean to be weird or make you uncomfortable.” 

“You didn’t,” Thirteen said quietly. “Well. Not in a bad way. I’m just… not used to that.” 

“What, someone being nice to you?” Yaz asked, her brows furrowing. What kind of life had the woman had before the apocalypse? “Thirteen…”

“Amy said that Bill’s birthday is in a couple of days,” Thirteen said abruptly. 

Yaz pressed her lips together, deciding to let Thirteen change the subject. “Yeah. Her 25th.” 

“We should do something for it,” Thirteen said. 

Yaz looked at her, surprised. “Yeah?” 

Thirteen shrugged. “I like Bill. And it could be nice to boost morale.” She hesitated. “And I’ve never been to a birthday party before.” 

“You’ve never been to a birthday party? Even in the Before Times?” Yaz asked incredulously. 

Thirteen pressed her lips together, as if she’d revealed yet more information she hadn’t intended to. “I didn’t really have any friends.” 

“And your family…” Yaz trailed off. 

“Didn’t have much of one of those, either,” Thirteen said, her tone making it clear that she was not going to be discussing it any further. 

Yaz wanted to push, but she barely even knew this woman. It wouldn’t be right to pry like that. “Okay,” she said instead. “Let’s throw Bill a party. S’not like we can bake a cake or anything, but I’m sure we can come up with something.” She considered. “Actually, why don’t you and I go on a little scouting mission?” 

“Right now?” Thirteen asked, puzzled. “We still have another hour or so before we’re relieved.” 

“No,” Yaz said, a small smile spreading across her face. Thirteen had a habit of taking things too literally sometimes, and while it had initially annoyed her a bit, she now found it rather endearing. “Tomorrow. Or today, I guess, after we rest. We can consult with Graham on whereabouts we might find a party store, and really go big on the celebrations. Also, maybe we can finally find you a tent. Which is what we’ll tell everyone else is our main goal, so the party can be a surprise for Bill.” 

“I don’t need a tent, though.” 

“Maybe not, but it’s a good excuse. And I really don’t like that you sleep out in the elements every night, even if you say it’s fine.” Yaz had more than once considered offering to share her tent with Thirteen, but hadn’t been able to go through with it. Not only had she not shared the tent with anyone since Sonya had died, but the thought of being in such close quarters so frequently with Thirteen sent a shiver down Yaz’s spine that could only lead to nothing good. The woman was getting too much under her skin. In all honesty, going on a scouting mission with just the two of them probably (definitely) wasn’t the wisest idea, but Yaz told herself it was to keep the party a surprise. The less amount of time people knew about it, the likelier it was to stay that way. 

“Okay,” Thirteen agreed. “Let’s do it.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

“I’d say head west, towards Todmorden,” Graham suggested. Yaz had managed to get a few hours’ sleep after their watch, even if it hadn’t felt like enough. She didn’t want to start their journey too late, though, so they could still hopefully be back before nightfall. “I had a mate who moved there once; it was a cute little market town. Should be able to find what you need round there. Hopefully it hasn’t been completely ransacked. Pretty long walk, though.” 

“It’ll be fine,” Yaz said, ignoring Graham’s glance at her side. “It’ll be good for me to get some exercise again now that I’m pretty much healed.” She’d been going stir-crazy the last couple weeks being confined to camp. It wasn’t like they needed to go on a supply run or anything, and she probably wouldn’t have needed to leave the camp anyway. But the fact that she couldn’t even if she wanted to was enough to drive her mad. 

“And you’re sure you two will be fine on your own? I can come with you,” Graham offered.
“Nah,” Yaz shook her head, a playful smile on her face. “Need you to stay back and keep everyone in line.” 

“If they don’t, they’ll get the old soft shoe shuffle,” Graham said smugly. It was a running joke of his – apparently, his dancing was so bad he might as well be shooting lasers out of his feet at everyone in his immediate vicinity. Yaz didn’t fully understand it, but she didn’t push. It was hard to find laughter these days. 

Rather than announce their departure to the whole camp and risk more interrogating, Yaz and Thirteen decided to just head out and let Graham tell everyone that they’d gone scouting. Thirteen, ever chivalrous, insisted on carrying Yaz’s rucksack. Usually, Yaz would argue more about it, but she had to admit the thought of their long hike was already daunting enough without carrying their food and water, considering she’d barely moved at all in the last couple weeks. 

There was an easy silence as they walked, and Yaz could tell that Thirteen was going much slower than she usually would to accommodate Yaz. Somehow, from her, it felt more kind than patronising. They took a few breaks along the way, making sure to stay hydrated and munch on a couple of stale cereal bars. 

“Can I ask you a question?” Yaz asked while they were stopped for a break.

Thirteen looked at her warily. “Sure.” 

“Why are you called Thirteen?” 

Thirteen pressed her lips together, shrugging. “Dunno. It’s just what I’ve always been called. Never thought about it.” 

“Do you like it?” 

Thirteen scrunched her nose. “Like I said, guess I’ve never thought about it. It’s just my name.” 

“Have you ever thought of a nickname?” Yaz asked curiously. “Like, is that something you would be opposed to?” 

Thirteen tilted her head, her brows furrowed. “Why?” 

Yaz felt her cheeks darken, not sure why she suddenly felt nervous. After all, she didn’t want the woman to feel self-conscious about her name or anything. It were just that… “I don’t know, I was just thinking about it. Thirteen seems so… formal. Or indifferent, I guess. Not that it’s a bad name! It’s not. It’s interesting, actually. It just doesn’t seem very… you.” Yaz snapped her mouth shut, wondering when she’d become such a rambler. 

“What does seem like…me?” Thirteen asked curiously. 

Yaz shrugged, trying to act casual. “I don’t know. I were kind of thinking, maybe, Tee?” 

“Tee,” Thirteen murmured, her face scrunching up again as she considered it. “I like it.” She sounded almost surprised at her own words. “You really think it suits me?” 

Yaz smiled. “I do.” 

A grin started to slowly spread across Tee’s face. “Thirteen and Yasmin, Tee and Yaz to their friends.” 

Yaz felt her heart skip a beat. There was such a genuineness behind Tee, and it made Yaz feel a wave of protectiveness towards the blonde. 

This stranger who had saved her life, who had somehow – against all odds (the odds being Yaz’s inherent distrust towards anyone nowadays, but that was neither here nor there) – become her friend.  

“C’mon, Tee,” Yaz said, slowly standing back up. “Let’s go get some birthday decorations.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

They made it to Todmorden without incident, moving more slowly the closer they got to the town to keep a better look out for Cybers. 

“Oh, perfect,” Yaz said as they walked down one of the main streets. “There’s the party store, and a B&M right across. Let’s go see if they’ve got a tent, first.” 

They had easily settled into a pattern of checking out their surroundings, instinctively covering each others’ backs in a way that felt as if they’d been doing it for years. They walked through the B&M, which had definitely seen better days. Most of the food items were gone, but there was still a decent selection of home goods and gardening stuff. Luckily, it had been camping season when the Cybers had started to take over, and Yaz managed to find a shitty cheap tent buried amidst all the junk. 

“It’s not much, but it’ll at least be some protection,” Yaz said, scrunching her nose as she looked at the tent. 

“It’s brilliant,” Tee said. “Although I still rather like the princess one we saw in the toy aisle.” 

“You wouldn’t be able to fit in that,” Yaz chided. “And it would blow away with the first gentle breeze that comes through.” 

Tee scrunched her nose in that adorable way that Yaz was already growing way too fond of. “Maybe.” 

Yaz slung the tent over her shoulder on the side that wasn’t injured, insisting that Tee couldn’t very well carry everything. They went into the party shop, which was relatively untouched, considering. Yaz supposed most people weren’t that interested in balloons and birthday cards when stuff like food was quickly running out. 

“Oh, they’ve still got chocolate bars in here,” Yaz crowed, delighted. “Wonder if they’re any good. Probably not.” She sniffed one. “Doesn’t smell bad, though. Might be fine.” 

Tee grabbed a different bar, opening it up and taking a giant bite out of it. 

“Tee!” Yaz said, her eyes widening. “What if it’s moldy or something?” 

Tee looked at the bar. “Doesn’t look moldy,” she mumbled around her mouthful of half-chewed chocolate. “It’s delicious.” 

Yaz rolled her eyes, biting back a smile. “Well, then. I think I’ll get Bill one of these.” She grabbed one that had a little dog with slippers on and said ‘Bestest Grandad’. 

Tee looked at it, nodding. “I see. It’s ironic, because Bill is neither old nor a man.” 

Yaz chuckled. “Yep, that’s about it.” 

Tee beamed. “I think she’ll find it funny.” 

“I do, too.” 

Tee started towards the back of the shop, where there were birthday banners and candles and the like. She found a mug that had the number 25 on it, and excitedly tucked that in their rucksack as well amongst some pairs of socks they’d found in the store – including a pair of blue striped ones that Tee insisted she needed. 

“How did you meet Bill?” Tee asked as Yaz was studying the wall of balloons they had. “You two seem to be quite close.” 

“We met online several years ago,” Yaz said, feeling nostalgia come over her. “On tumblr, actually.” At Tee’s confused glance, she elaborated further. “It was a website where people had blogs and posted all sorts of different things. You really were sheltered, weren’t you?” she added teasingly. 

“You have no idea,” Tee muttered, a sad expression passing across her face before she smiled once more. “So, you both had blogs?” 

“Yeah,” Yaz said, smiling as she remembered it. “We both were super into Buffy the Vampire Slayer . Specifically Buffy and Faith, even though they weren’t actually together. They were my gay awakening.” 

“Oh,” Tee said, and Yaz tensed at the shift in her tone. “So were you and Bill… did you ever…” 

Yaz’s brows furrowed. “Like, did we ever date?” 

“Yeah,” Tee said, with what sounded like a forced lightness. 

Yaz couldn’t stop the snort that escaped her. “No. God, no. She’s one of my best mates, that’s all. Even before all of this happened.” 

“Oh.” Tee seemed… pleased. Or was Yaz reading too much into that? Probably. Definitely. Either way, it didn’t matter. And yet – 

“Why? You into her or something?” Yaz asked, and this time it was her trying to sound casual. 

“What?” Tee’s voice was nearly a squeak. “No.” She shook her head, her tone sounding more normal. “No, I’m not into her.” 

If Yaz wasn’t crazy, there was a slight emphasis on the word her. Except there wouldn’t be. Because that would mean Tee might be interested in Yaz. Which would be ridiculous. And pointless. 

“Right,” Yaz said, pushing aside the feeling of relief that rushed through her. “Cool.” 

There was a moment of awkward silence between them, both of them avoiding the other’s gaze. Deciding to break the silence, Yaz started looking at some of the nearby cards. 

“Oh my god, some of these are the ones that sing,” she said, reaching for one that had Elsa from Frozen on it. “I wonder if –” 

She opened the card, and sure enough, Let It Go started playing, albeit slightly static-y sounding. “God, these batteries really do last quite awhile. Do you think –” 

“Wait,” Tee said, suddenly going still. “Do you hear that?” 

Yaz furrowed her brows. “Hear what?” she asked as she closed the birthday card. 

Tee’s eyes widened as she looked behind Yaz, and Yaz heard the click of a gun being cocked. 

“Get on your knees,” came a man’s deep, rough voice. “And put your hands above your fucking head.” 

Chapter Text

Tee’s heart started to race as Yaz’s eyes widened, her chest heaving as she looked at Tee. Behind her stood a scruffy-looking man, a hard set to his jaw as he pointed his revolver at the back of Yaz’s head. 

A flurry of possible options and their outcomes flashed through Tee’s mind. Now that she wasn’t distracted, she could hear the slight shuffling sounds of at least one other person – most likely armed, she was sure – in the immediate vicinity, probably hidden behind one of the card racks near the gunman. If she was quick enough – and she was – she could knock Yaz out of the way, disarm the gunman, and take out both of the bandits. Or whatever the hell they were. 

But that would involve letting Yaz see the truth. Letting her see that she wasn’t human. 

She tried to tell herself that she couldn’t do that because it would compromise her mission, revealing her identity this soon in the game. She wasn’t sure why her mother was so intent on things happening this way, rather than just destroying them by brute force, but she knew Tecteun wouldn’t be happy if it fell apart this quickly. 

If she were being honest, though, what scared her more was the thought of the look in Yaz’s eyes if – when – she did discover it. 

So. That left only one route. 

Giving Yaz the smallest of nods, Tee held her hands in the air, slowly sinking to her knees. Yaz mirrored her, and Tee could see the slight tremor in the brunette’s hands. 

“Check the blonde one first,” the man said gruffly, glancing to his side, and a woman came around from behind the card rack, moving towards Tee. “And her bag.” 

The woman patted Tee down, taking the couple of knives she had strapped to her before rifling through the bag. 

“Where’s your camp?” the woman asked, holding up the birthday banner. “Looks like you’re planning quite the party.” 

“Don’t have one,” Yaz answered. “It’s my birthday. We just wanted to celebrate.” 

Tee made sure to keep her expression neutral, waiting to see what the bandits’ next moves were. 

“Check the other one,” the man said, and the woman obeyed. When she reached for the blue-handled knife at Yaz’s ankle, Tee saw Yaz stiffen. 

“Quite like this one,” the woman said, rotating it around as she studied it. “Think I might keep it.” 

Tee could practically feel the tension coming from Yaz, could feel how she was about to snap. For some reason, that knife was special to her. 

“Enough admiring,” the man said. “Tie up their hands.” 

Tee’s breathing started to quicken, instinctual panic rising in her chest. 

“I’m sorry, Thirteen,” her mother said in a voice that didn’t sound particularly apologetic as the child fought against her restraints. She hadn’t yet learned that giving in made it pass by at least a little faster. “But if you won’t cooperate, I’m afraid I have no choice.”

“Tee.” She heard Yaz’s voice, barely audible, and focused her gaze on the brunette as the bandit woman wound a rope around Yaz’s wrists. It’s okay, her eyes seemed to say. Focus on me.  

Tee took in a few deep breaths, holding Yaz’s gaze as the other woman moved to tie Tee’s hands as well. It took all of her willpower not to fight it, not to give in to the panic, but she knew that if she couldn’t, it would be putting Yaz in danger. And that, she couldn’t bear. 

“Alright,” the man said once they were sufficiently bound. “Let’s take them to the boss.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

As it turned out, the bandits had had a cart nearby, pulled by two horses. Tee supposed she should be grateful that it was a cart not far off the ground, even if it was still a rather ungraceful affair trying to get far enough into it that she wouldn’t fall off, considering she didn’t have much use of her arms and it had quite a few supplies stacked in it. Stars knew she wouldn’t be letting either of the bandits help her. 

They’d now been clomping along for the better part of twenty minutes, sitting opposite each other while the man sat facing them, still holding the gun. The woman faced forward, guiding the horses – to where, Tee wasn’t sure. Still, she kept counting the seconds as they went along, paying attention to the location of the sun in the sky to try and keep her bearings for when they escaped. 

Because they would escape. There was no other option; Tee couldn’t let anything happen to Yaz. 

In this moment, Tee wished she could use the contact connection she had with her mother with other people. That she could tell Yaz it would all be okay, that she would find a way to get them out of this. 

Of course, that would also involve her revealing her… otherness. 

“Where are you taking us?” Tee asked the man, who raised an eyebrow at her. 

“And why would I tell you that?” he asked in return, a slight drawl to his voice. 

“Dunno. It’s not like it matters if you plan on killing us anyway. Is that the plan?” 

“Guess that depends on how helpful you are to the boss.” 

“Right. Second time you’ve mentioned him. Them. Probably shouldn’t assume they’re a he, should I?” Yaz was looking at Tee like she was ready to clobber her, but Tee wanted as much information as she could get before they met this mysterious ‘boss’. “Just want to know about who you’re kidnapping us for.” 

“ He ,” the man started, “is not much for nattering. That’s all you need to know.” 

Tee scrunched her nose. She started to open her mouth to respond again, but closed it after another glare from Yaz. 

They rode the rest of the way in silence, going for about another twenty minutes or so before pulling up to an abandoned-looking farmhouse. 

After she and Yaz had managed to get out of the cart, they were directed into the farmhouse. Inside was sparsely furnished and rather dull, and Tee wrinkled her nose. On top of the table and counters was quite a bit of garbage piled up, with some flies buzzing around. The woman dropped Yaz’s rucksack and their tent by the door before grabbing her gun and pointing towards the two of them. 

“Nice place you’ve got here,” Tee said dryly. “Probably. If you cleaned up a bit. I mean, I’m messy, but this?” 

“Enough talking,” the bandit man said, grabbing Tee by the arm. Tee bristled at the contact, but knew better than to fight back right now. She let herself be taken over to a post supporting one of the roof beams, where a metal ring was attached a fair bit above her head. 

“Arms up,” the man said roughly, and Tee cursed the fact that he had a good half a foot on her as he secured the rope around her wrists to the ring before doing the same to Yaz on a post a couple metres away from Tee. She could see Yaz’s wince as her arms lifted, pulling at the mostly healed wound, and she fought the urge to snarl at the bandits. 

After making sure Yaz’s rope was secured, both of the bandits went up the nearby stairs, leaving Tee and Yaz alone. 

“Are you alright?” Tee asked as soon as she was sure the bandits were gone, her voice a soft murmur. 

“I’m fine,” Yaz said, but Tee could hear the hint of strain in her voice. “But what the hell are you doing? Are you trying to antagonise them?” 

“I have a plan,” Tee said, giving her a sort of non-answer. And she did have a plan. Kind of. Not really. 

Early days. 

“Yeah, well, I hope it works,” Yaz muttered. “I don’t fancy dying in a smelly farmhouse.” 

“I’m going to get us out of here, Yaz,” Tee said firmly. “One way or another.” 

Yaz looked more vulnerable than Tee had ever seen her. “Promise?” she asked quietly. 

Tee swallowed hard. “I promise.” 

“How touching,” came a masculine voice, different from the man who had kidnapped them. Tee turned to see a man wearing a black suit, golden snakes adorning the shoulders. His face was clean-shaven, his eyes cold and callous as they flickered between Tee and Yaz. 

“You must be the mysterious boss,” Tee said, lifting her chin in defiance. “I’m Tee. Tell me, to whom do we owe the pleasure? Might as well exchange names, after all. Not like there’s any police to report you to when we get out of here.” 

The man gave an amused smile. “You seem quite confident in that.” 

Tee shrugged as best she could, considering that her arms were tied above her head. 

“You can call me Prentis,” the man said. 

“What do you want, Prentis?” Yaz asked, a hard edge to her voice. 

“I’m going to question you both,” Prentis started, with a tone that Tee didn’t like. Whatever his form of ‘questioning’ was, she was sure it wasn’t good. He grabbed a gun from inside his jacket pocket, pointing it between the two of them. “Now, which of you do I start with?” 

The thought of him putting his hands anywhere near Yaz made a rage rear its head in Tee, so strong that it nearly took her breath away. 

No. She couldn’t let him see that. If he did, if he spotted that weakness, he would pounce on it. 

She had to try another way. 

“Seems like you’ve done this before,” Tee said, raising an eyebrow and ignoring the look she could sense Yaz giving her. Seemed to be a lot of those, recently. “So, have you always been this much of a nutter? Or did it just start after the apocalypse?” 

Prentis’ jaw clenched. Definitely didn’t like being called names, then. “I do what needs to be done.” 

“Really? Seems to me like you get others to do most of the work,” Tee said casually. “Tell me, do you have them risk their lives to get your razors, too? You look remarkably well-kept, is all.”

Prentis’ nostrils flared, and Tee fought back a smile at how easy he was to rile. 

“Garron! Rosanna!” 

The other two bandits came down the stairs, both with guns at the ready. 

“Garron, untie the blonde. We’ll bring her upstairs. Rosanna, watch the other one.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

“Quite the torture chamber you’ve got going on here. Didn’t realise you were that much of a psychopath.” Tee had been taken to a room filled with all sorts of weaponry, rope, duct tape – and most importantly, the wooden contraption in the centre of the room that she was now resting against, her hands and feet tied to it. She pulled at her restraints a bit, focusing her senses on the rope around her. There was the slightest hint of rot beginning to take over it, and she felt a bit of give when she gave a small tug. Good. “So what? Are you going to kill me now?” 

Prentis smiled coldly. “Something like that.” He tsk ed. “But if you tell me where the rest of your camp is, I might be inclined to make your time here a little less painful.” 

“Like we told your little pets out there, it’s just the two of us,” Tee said, lifting her chin towards the door Garron had disappeared through moments earlier. “And you’re ruining my friend’s birthday, by the way.” 

“Friend, hm?” Prentis said, tilting his head. 

Tee forced herself to keep a neutral face, holding the man’s gaze. 

“I’ve always wondered about the bonds of friendship,” Prentis said after a moment. “And romance. Garron and Rosanna, you know, they stay together because they care about each other. They stay with me for protection, for safety. Which, I wonder, would win out in the end?” He hummed. “Self-preservation? Or love? It’s fascinating, truly. Personally, I believe in the selfishness of the human race. Give them enough time, and they’ll turn on each other in a heartbeat.” 

Tee thought about Yaz, about Bill and the rest of the camp. Their compassion. The way they protected each other, not as a form of ownership or of commanding respect, but because they cared about each other in their own ways. 

“You’re wrong,” Tee said quietly. “Love is the most powerful weapon we have.” 

Was Tee part of that ‘we’? It was easy to feel that way, the more time she spent around Yaz and the rest of their camp. Easier to forget that she wasn’t human. Did that mean she couldn’t feel it? She knew there was something - she could feel it when she heard Yaz’s laugh, when she saw Rory kissing Amy, when she watched Dan and Graham playfully argue about which sports team used to be better. 

“How poetic,” Prentis said, jerking Tee’s attention back to the present moment as he walked over to the table of weapons, selecting a hunting knife. “Unfortunately, love has nothing against a blade.” 

Tee’s breathing picked up a bit, her hands balling into fists as she started to subtly pull at the restraints. 

Prentis walked up to her, trailing the tip of the knife down her jawline, her neck. “Tell me what I want to know.” 

“You don’t want to do this,” Tee said, one final warning. 

She felt the press of the knife into her neck, felt the blood trailing down as he dragged the knife down a few centimetres. 

Felt her skin immediately fuse back together. 

A look of surprise and something else she wasn’t sure how to interpret flashed across Prentis’ face before Tee used all her strength to snap the rope. She immediately shoved him out of the way, lunging for the weapons table and grabbing a gun, clicking the safety off as she pointed it at Prentis. 

“Say a single word and I will pull this trigger.” 

Prentis stared at her, his mouth firmly closed. 

“Drop the knife.” 

When he did, she gestured to an iron fireplace in the corner, its legs welded to the floor. “Go sit over there.” 

She tossed a pair of handcuffs that were on the weapons table towards him, still holding the gun with her other hand. “Fix your leg to it. Now.” 

Prentis looked like he was ready to snarl at her, but he did as commanded, connecting himself to the fireplace by his ankle. 

“Hands behind your back.” She grabbed a roll of duct tape and walked over behind him, setting the gun down to secure his hands behind his back before putting another piece of tape over his mouth. 

“Taste of your own medicine, I’m afraid,” Tee said as she stood, taking the gun before starting downstairs, closing the door to the torture chamber behind her. 

She crept slowly down the stairs, careful not to let them creak. When she rounded the corner, she saw Garron and Rosanna sitting around watching Yaz, who was still tied up to the ring. Garron had a gun in his hand; Rosanna was playing around with the blue-handled knife she’d taken from Yaz. 

Yaz saw her, and her eyes widened almost imperceptibly. Tee held up a finger to her lips, but Yaz’s face grew determined. 

“So,” Yaz said to Garron. He looked up at her, seemingly surprised that she had spoken. “Have you always been under Prentis’ thumb? Or did you used to have a little self-respect?” 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Garron said sharply. 

“Just calling it like I see it, mate,” Yaz said casually. She looked at Rosanna. “Can’t believe you can stomach being with a man like that.” 

Garron’s face shifted, and he stood, lifting the gun to point it at her. Before he could say anything, Tee pulled the trigger. 

The gun fell out of his bleeding hand, and Garron screamed as he sank to the floor, holding his hand. Rosanna, her eyes wide and panicked, turned to Tee.

“The next one goes between his eyes.” Tee lifted her chin at Rosanna. “Drop the knife and kick it over to me.” 

She complied, and Tee picked up the knife, still training the gun in their direction. 

“Now kick his gun over, too.” 

Again, Rosanna obeyed, her hands shaking. 

“I’m going to cut Yaz loose,” Tee said, her voice dangerously low. “And you’re going to let us walk out of here. Do we understand each other?” 

Rosanna nodded shakily. 

“Your mate’s upstairs,” Tee said. “But I’d take care of that hand first. Wouldn’t want him to lose it.” 

Tee moved over to Yaz, still holding the gun pointing at the bandits as she used her other hand to cut Yaz’s ropes. 

“Yaz, grab our things,” Tee said quietly, following her while walking backwards. Garron was gritting his teeth, clearly in too much pain to do anything, and Rosanna was digging through what looked like medical supplies. 

When they stepped outside, Tee saw that they had left the horses hitched outside on a post. 

“Do you know how to ride?” she asked Yaz. 

“I mean, I haven’t ridden a horse since I was, like, eleven,” Yaz said warily. “Are you thinking –” 

“It’ll get us away from here faster.” 

Yaz muttered something under her breath before sighing. “Right. Okay.” She set the tent and the rucksack down, stepping up onto the little fence the horses were hitched to to climb into the saddle. “Hand me the stuff?” 

Tee instead slung the rucksack over her shoulder, handing the tent to Yaz and then climbing up behind her. It was awkward, but eventually she felt like neither of them were in danger of falling off. 

“Let’s get the fuck out of here.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

Once they had gotten a fair bit of distance away, Tee was able to relax enough that now all she could focus on was the feeling of her arms around Yaz’s waist. It was odd, being so closely pressed against her, but… nice. Even if it was slightly overwhelming. 

They’d just reached a small river when the horse started to become skittish, doing a nervous little dance that had Tee feeling rather precariously balanced. 

“Don’t think she likes water,” Yaz said dryly. 

“We probably couldn’t take care of a horse, anyway,” Tee remarked. “Maybe we just send her off. Pretty sure most horses know their way home or something like that. And we’re not too far of a walk away now. I recognise that tree.” 

Yaz nodded. “Alright.” 

Tee slid off the horse before grabbing the tent from Yaz, tossing it to the ground before helping her off the horse. When Yaz hit the ground, she stumbled forward into Tee’s arms, and Tee couldn’t help her sharp intake of breath. 

“You okay?” Yaz asked, her voice full of concern. “Did Prentis hurt you?” 

“No, no,” Tee said, swallowing hard. “I’m fine.” 

Yaz nodded, stepping back. She slapped the horse’s rump, and the mare took off back the way they came. 

Yaz turned to face the river, sighing. “We’re gonna be chafing so bad walking home after this.” 

“Might as well get it over with,” Tee said, scrunching her nose. The river wasn’t very deep, but it did go up to their waists. Tee held the rucksack above her head just in case, determined not to let Bill’s party decor get ruined. 

They made it through without incident, starting the walk back - albeit moving rather slowly, considering their lower halves were completely soaked. It didn’t help that the sun was lowering in the sky, meaning they probably wouldn’t get very dry before making it back to camp and getting a change of clothes. 

As they walked, Tee trailing along behind Yaz, she felt that familiar buzzing in her ears, as well as what felt like a slight pressure in her skull. 

“Contact.” 

Tee stiffened. Not wanting to let Yaz know that something was going on, she kept walking, grateful that Yaz seemed to be content in their silence. 

“Contact.” 

“Is everything going well, Thirteen?” 

Thirteen. Right. Because that’s who she was supposed to be. Thirteen, who obeyed her mother’s mission, not Tee who shot a man to protect a human. Not that her mother would – or could – know that. 

“Of course.” 

“You’d tell me if it wasn’t,” Tecteun said, more of a statement than a question. “Isn’t that right?” 

“Of course, Mother.” Tee pressed her lips together. “Everything is on track now. We should start searching for the compass soon.” 

“Very well. Until next time, Thirteen.” 

Contact broken, again. 

Tee felt a strange sense of unease rise in her chest, and she stumbled a step.  

“Alright, Tee?” Yaz asked, concerned. 

“Yeah,” Tee said, not believing it at all. “Alright.”

Chapter Text

The silence between them was more stilted than usual as they walked back to camp. 

Tee had said she was alright, and usually Yaz would believe her – but how could either of them be alright after what had just happened? 

Yaz stole another glance at the blonde, but there was nothing to be gleaned from those impassive hazel eyes. 

“Tee -” 

“I forgot,” Tee interrupted, holding out Sonya’s knife. “I think this is yours.” 

Yaz gently took it, rubbing her thumb along the handle. She’d been very aware of the fact Tee had been carrying it since she’d stolen it back from Rosanna, but had felt anxious about asking for it back - mostly, because she was afraid that if she let Tee see how important that knife was to her, she would ask questions. Questions Yaz wasn’t sure she was ready to answer. 

Unfortunately, she’d underestimated Tee’s perceptiveness. 

“Seems like it’s pretty important to you,” the blonde said lightly. “The knife.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together, swallowing hard. She gave a little half-shrug. “Yeah. It is.” 

“Why?” Tee asked curiously. 

Yaz clenched her jaw. Not perceptive enough, apparently. No. That wasn’t fair. Tee’s curiosity was nothing but genuine, and Yaz knew that if she told her to piss off, she would. 

Instead, she took in a deep breath. “It was my sister’s.” 

Tee was quiet for a moment. “Is she…” 

“Dead.” Yaz’s voice was empty, numb. No matter how many times she said it, each time felt just as unreal as the last. Even though she’d held her in her last moments, felt the last breath leave her body, she still sometimes couldn’t believe that her sister was gone. Every time she thought that she had grieved, that she had moved on as best as one could, it would hit her - a tidal wave that threatened to drown her. “She… she had run off on her own. Trying to prove herself to me. By the time Ryan and I got to her, she was being taken by a Cyber. There was nothing we could do. So Ryan… Ryan killed her. To stop her from being converted.” 

“You haven’t forgiven him for it.” There was no accusation in Tee’s voice, only understanding. Yaz knew that she must have picked up on the tension between her and Ryan during her time at the camp; now, at least, she had her answers as to why. 

“I haven’t forgiven any of us.” The words spilled out of Yaz before she could stop them. They hung in the air, the truth of them sharper than the knife Yaz now carried. 

“Yaz,” Tee said softly, and Yaz stiffened. 

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore,” she said, her tone leaving no room for discussion. 

She faced forward, quickening her pace as she walked towards the camp. Tee followed her, and the silence between them was deafening. 

Yaz gripped the knife more tightly. She wasn’t sure what it was about Tee that had provoked her to be so honest, so raw. 

All she knew was that it needed to end. Before both of them got hurt. 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

“What the fuck happened to you two? You were supposed to be back hours ago,” Bill said, jogging up to them as they approached camp. “And you both look like shit.” 

“Bandits,” Yaz said tersely. “Now if you don’t mind, I’d really like to change out of these clothes.” 

“Hold on, mate,” Bill said. “Bandits? We haven’t seen any signs of other humans for months.” 

“Yeah, well, seems like we’re having some pretty shit luck at the moment,” Yaz muttered. 

Bill snorted. “You can say that again.” She looked between the two of them, her brows furrowed. “How’d you get away?” 

The next one goes between his eyes. Yaz thought about the sure way Tee had held that gun, the coldness in her eyes as she stared Rosanna down. She still didn’t know exactly what the blonde had done to Prentis, either. 

“Tee saved the day,” Yaz said eventually, when it appeared the blonde would not be answering. “Again.” 

“Tee?” 

“Yaz gave me a nickname,” Tee said, a hint of pink darkening her cheeks. “Because we’re friends.” 

“I see,” Bill said, a smirk on her face that had Yaz narrowing her eyes. “Are we friends, Tee? Can I call you that too?” 

Tee’s blush deepened, and Yaz felt a strange wave of jealousy. 

“Yeah, s’pose,” Tee said shyly. “I mean, you all have taken me in. S’only fair you call me Tee.” 

“Brill.” Bill grinned. “Anyways, I’ll let the gang know what’s up and you can fill us in later. You really should go change; you guys stink.” 

“Wow, thanks,” Yaz said dryly. It wasn’t like any of them smelled great on any given day. God, what Yaz would do for a long, hot shower. 

Bill simply blew her a kiss before heading off, and Yaz started to already mentally prepare herself for the wave of questions she was sure they were about to get. At least they’d managed to hold onto the tent, and Tee would have some actual shelter to sleep under. And they’d be able to keep Bill’s party a secret. 

“As soon as I’ve got some dry clothes on, I’ll help you put up your tent,” Yaz offered, a hesitancy in her voice. They’d hardly spoken a word since Yaz had snapped at her, and she regretted it, even if she probably would have made the same choice again. It was better this way; Tee didn’t need to see how damaged she was. 

“Sure,” Tee said, a polite smile on her face that felt like a punch to Yaz’s gut. 

“Tee…” Yaz started. 

“See you in a few,” Tee said, quickly heading over to where she had been stashing her lone bag. 

Yaz sighed, heading over to her tent and quickly putting on some dry clothes before hanging her old ones out. Hopefully there would be no rain tomorrow and they would dry pretty quickly. She stashed the rucksack of Bill’s party supplies in her tent, away from prying eyes. 

Then, once she was sufficiently dry, she started to head over to where she was pretty sure Tee would be, only to find that the blonde had already been ambushed by half the camp. 

Tee looked rather overwhelmed, and Yaz strode up to the group. “Give the woman room to breathe, guys.” 

“Ugh, finally,” Amy said. “ Tee here won’t give us anything. What happened? Did you guys kick their arses?” 

Yaz looked at Tee, who was still oddly silent. “I mean, I spent most of the time hanging by my wrists to a post. Don’t know what I would have done if Tee hadn’t been there.” She wrinkled her nose. “The guy who was watching me said that his boss has been hunting survivors. Didn’t say why, but based on his ‘boss’s’ demeanour, it wasn’t for anything good. Bloody psycho.” 

“How far away were you?” Ryan asked, an undercurrent of worry in his voice. 

“Not far enough,” Yaz said grimly. “Actually, I think we need to talk about whether or not it’s safe to stay here. But I want everyone together for that.” 

“I can go get the rest of us to meet at the centre of camp.” 

Yaz nodded. “Thanks, Ryan.” 

He gave her a small, close-lipped smile that she returned in kind. Progress.  

“Are you guys doing okay? Do either of you need me to have a look over?” Rory asked, looking between Tee and Yaz. 

“No,” Tee said immediately, and Yaz’s brows furrowed at the intensity of her voice. “He didn’t get to lay a hand on me. But you were hung up for a while, Yaz. Is your wound okay?” 

“It’s fine,” Yaz said, although it had been smarting for a bit. “Promise,” she added after both Tee and Rory gave her wary looks. 

“Alright. Let me know if that changes, okay?” Rory said, and Yaz nodded. “I’ll see you both in a few.” 

He started heading off, leaving Tee and Yaz alone. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Tee asked quietly. 

“Yeah, course,” Yaz answered. She sighed. “A little shaken up. But I’m physically fine. I’m more worried about you.” 

Tee frowned. “Why would you be?” 

“Because… you’re my friend,” Yaz said. “And you’re the one who got taken upstairs by Prentis. Are you sure he didn’t touch you?” 

“Think I’d know if he had,” Tee said dryly. 

“How did you even get out of there, anyway?” Yaz asked. “I mean, it seems like he’s done this a lot. The way he was acting –” 

“Was overconfident,” Tee interrupted. “He got cocky, and it cost him.” 

“Tee–”
“I’d really rather not talk about it, Yaz.” Tee had an almost pained expression on her face, and Yaz swallowed hard. 

The next one goes between his eyes.  

“Okay,” Yaz said quietly. She bit her bottom lip nervously. “I do just have to ask one more question, though.” 

Tee looked at her warily. “What?” 

“Would you have actually killed him?” There was no need to elaborate; she could see on Tee’s face that the blonde knew exactly what she was talking about. 

There was a moment of silence, the tension heavy in the air. 

“If it meant keeping you safe,” Tee said, her voice barely audible. “Yes.” 

Yaz’s lips parted as she stared at Tee, her breathing growing more shallow. She’d asked for an answer, but now that she’d gotten one, she didn’t know how to feel about the raw honesty in Tee’s voice.

She barely even knew this woman. Her admission was both terrifying and exhilarating; Yaz had to remind herself that she didn’t truly know all that Tee was capable of. Truthfully, she didn’t know much of anything about the blonde. 

Besides the fact that she cared enough about Yaz to kill for her. 

Bit intense, that. 

“Tee -” 

“We should probably meet the rest of them. Before they come searching again.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together, nodding. “Yeah. Right.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

They walked in silence to the centre of camp, where Ryan had gathered everyone together. 

“Okay,” Yaz said, once she had everyone’s attention. “As I’m sure everyone knows by this point, Tee and I were ambushed by bandits out in Todmorden. We were taken to another location – I’m not sure exactly where, but it was only five or six miles away from here, I’d say. Which is dangerously close for my liking.” She looked around the group, seeing similar expressions of unease on their faces. “So, the question is – is it time for us to move on?” 

“Where would we go?” Graham asked. “Seems to me that it could be safer to stay where we are. Least we know the area well and can defend it if they do come after us.” 

“Or we go find them and blow their shit up,” Adam suggested. 

“We won’t be doing that,” Yaz said firmly. “We’ve had enough violence. And besides, I don’t fancy another run-in with that psychopath.” 

“He can’t be all that, if Tee managed to get the better of him,” Adam said, and Tee’s eyes narrowed. “No offense, of course.” 

“Either way, I’d prefer we don’t find out what he’s capable of,” Yaz replied. Him or Tee.  

“We can’t just go wandering without a plan,” Dan piped up. “Can we?” 

“I’d rather not,” Rory said. “Especially with Amy -” 

“I’ll be fine,” Amy interrupted. “And so will the baby. Yaz is right; I don’t want to run into this guy either if he comes hunting.” 

Rory pressed his lips together, clearly still worried. 

“We’re going to run out of supplies around here eventually,” Ryan pointed out. “It’s already getting pretty rough. We can’t live here forever. We’ve relocated before; we can do it again.” 

“Again, where would we go?” Graham repeated, wrinkling his nose. “Feels pointless gallivanting around with no end in sight.” 

“As opposed to sitting still with no end in sight?” Bill said, shaking her head. “This is life now. Ryan’s right. We can’t stay here forever. Might as well get going now before preggo over there gets any bigger and can’t walk.” 

Amy flipped Bill off, and Bill made a kissing motion at her. 

There was a moment of silence, everyone clearly struggling internally. 

“We could find Arcadia.” 

Everyone’s gaze turned to Tee at her quiet suggestion, a wide range of expressions on their faces. 

“Like I said before,” Adam spoke up first. “That’s a myth.” 

Yaz fought to keep her expression neutral. 

“I don’t think that’s true,” Tee said simply. 

“And what makes you think so?” Bill asked, sounding genuinely curious. 

“I have faith,” Tee answered, giving a half-hearted shrug. “None of us know for sure what’s out there. That’s why we keep looking. For something more. Something better than this.”

“Didn’t take you for a religious type,” Yaz said, raising an eyebrow. 

“Faith isn’t necessarily religious,” Tee countered. “It’s about trust. I have trust in humanity, in their desperation for survival. Who’s to say that Arcadia isn’t real? That somewhere, some very smart people haven’t foreseen this happening and created a safe haven for…for people like us?” A flicker of something Yaz couldn’t read passed across Tee’s face, but it was gone in an instant. 

“And how would we even find this place? In all the stories, there’s never been a hint of where it might be,” Rory said. 

Tee pressed her lips together. “Well,” she said slowly. “I don’t know if it’s true. But I have heard whispers about hidden compasses that can lead the holder there.” 

Adam snorted. “Yeah, right, that again. Sounds like something straight out of a storybook.” 

“And a literal apocalypse doesn’t?” Bill retorted. “Let her speak.” 

Tee hesitated, looking at Yaz, who simply shrugged. She wasn’t sure whether or not to believe it - she’d always thought that Arcadia wasn’t real, too - but she was willing to hear the blonde out. 

“I’m not sure how it works,” Tee said. “Some sort of advanced science, I think. They’re not supposed to be very easy to get to, but I had a friend once who told me where one was rumoured to be. That’s why I was heading through this area. I just didn’t want to say it before, mostly so you all didn’t think I was insane.” Tee gave a nervous laugh. “Course, here we are, anyway.” 

“And where is this mysterious compass rumoured to be?” Amy asked. 

“Sheffield.” 

Yaz tried not to flinch. 

Sheffield. Her home. The place where her parents had been converted - and then destroyed. 

After she’d lost her parents, she’d taken Sonya and left - and never looked back.

Ryan looked at her, and Yaz gave the smallest shake of her head. 

“That’s quite the journey from here,” Graham said, and Yaz could hear the hint of sadness in his voice as well. He, Ryan, and Ryan’s nan Grace had come along with her and Sonya when they’d left, and they hadn’t even made it out of the city before they’d lost Grace. 

“It’ll take some time,” Tee agreed. “But I think it’s worth a try. Maybe having a mission would be good for us.” 

Us. Yaz felt herself soften a bit at Tee’s words. In the few weeks that she’d been with them, she really had become a part of the group; Yaz could hardly imagine them without her, now. Even if there was still so much she wanted to know about her. 

Yaz took in a deep breath. “I think you could be right.” She looked around, meeting the gazes of everyone in the group. “But it’s up to all of us.” 

Bill, of course, was the first to speak up. “I’m in. Better than feeling like a sitting duck waiting for those fuckers to potentially come after us.” 

There was a moment of hesitation, and then slowly the rest of the group started to nod their heads. Rory was the last to do so, holding Yaz’s gaze. She remembered the words he said when she’d come back from Hebden Bridge, how he’d placed his trust in her to keep all of them - his family - safe. 

She swallowed hard, nodding back at him, hoping he could see in her eyes that she remembered, and that her promise still held. 

“Okay,” Yaz said. “We’ll need some time to gather everything and be ready. I say we leave the morning after tomorrow, if that works for everyone.” 

Again, everyone agreed. 

Yaz gave a nod of finality. “Alright, then. Tomorrow, we’ll start packing.” 

After everyone dispersed, Yaz turned to Tee, who was shuffling nervously. “Wanna get your tent set up?” she asked. “I know we’ll have to take it back down in less than 48 hours, but still. It’s not like it’s a difficult tent.” 

“Sure,” Tee replied, and they walked over to where Tee had set her tent down - not far from Yaz’s own, she noticed. 

They worked in silence, Yaz gathering up the courage to apologise. Finally, she managed to speak. “I’m sorry. For the way I snapped at you earlier. About the… the knife.” 

Tee shrugged. “S’alright.” 

“It’s not,” Yaz said, shaking her head. “You didn’t deserve that. It’s just… a touchy subject for me.” 

Tee nodded. “Really, Yaz. It’s okay. You don’t need to explain.” 

Yaz smiled softly. “Thanks, Tee.” 

Tee gave her a smile in return, and they went back to finishing up the tent. 

“By the way, I’m thinking we can do Bill’s surprise party tomorrow night,” Yaz murmured as Tee put the final stake in the ground. “If anyone catches wind, we just say that it’s a goodbye to this place.” 

Tee grinned. “Brilliant.” 

Yaz smiled, her expression turning wistful as she looked around the camp. “Gonna be weird leaving here. It’s not much, but it was home.”

Tee pressed her lips together. “Yeah. I get what you mean, even if I haven’t been here long.” There was a strange expression on her face, one that Yaz couldn’t read. “Are you… are you sure about wanting to search for this compass?” 

“I trust you,” Yaz said, and the words surprised her as much as they seemed to surprise Tee. “If you think it’s a good idea, then I’m in.” 

Tee swallowed hard, averting her gaze and looking out over the horizon. She looked as if she were about to say something, but then stopped herself. 

“Tee? You okay?” Yaz asked, concerned. 

Tee nodded. “Yeah,” she said finally, looking back at Yaz. “I just… I don’t want to let you down.” There was a sort of sadness in her tone, as if she’d already done so. 

“You won’t,” Yaz replied reassuringly. “Even if it turns out to be nothing, you’re right. We need a purpose. So thank you for that.” 

Tee gave her a half-hearted smile. “Course.” She nodded towards her tent, a weary expression on her face. “Think I might try to take a quick kip. See you for watch tonight?” 

Yaz nodded. “Sure.” 

Tee grabbed her bag, disappearing into her tent. Yaz almost stopped her - to say what, she didn’t know - but instead walked back to her own tent, intending to crash for a bit as well. 

Instead, she laid on the ground staring up at the ceiling, feeling a sense of unease taking root in her chest. 

They always said bad things come in threes, and Yaz was about to lead her group on what could be one of the most dangerous things they’d ever done. 

She just hoped she was making the right choice. 

Chapter Text

“Alright. You know the plan?” Yaz asked, and Tee gave a solemn nod. “You only have to keep her occupied for twenty minutes or so while I get everything set up. And then when you two come back –” 

“It’s the time to party,” Tee said with a grin, and Yaz couldn’t help but smile at the odd way in which Tee sometimes spoke. 

“Yeah,” Yaz agreed. “Party time.”

Tee’s eyes seemed to sparkle in the approaching golden hour, and for a moment the sight took Yaz’s breath away. 

“See you in twenty,” Tee said, oblivious to Yaz’s internal flusteredness as she skipped off to find Bill. 

What sort of plan Tee had formed to distract Bill, Yaz wasn’t sure – but she didn’t dare waste any time. Once she saw Tee and Bill walking off towards the woods, she went over to her tent and pulled out the rucksack full of party supplies before heading towards the centre of camp. Luckily, there happened to be a tree near the cooking station, and Yaz grabbed out the party banner first. 

“What’s all this, then?” Dan asked, looking up from the rabbit he was currently prepping. 

“Well,” Yaz said. “It’s Bill’s birthday. Tee and I thought it could be nice to celebrate.” 

Dan grinned. “I had a feeling you two had something up your sleeve when you went to Todmorden. Can’t believe you got kidnapped over some party favours, though.” 

“Don’t go on about it, Scouse,” Yaz said, rolling her eyes. “You wanna give me a hand? I were thinking we could tie one end to the tree and one end to this pole.” 

Dan helped her put the banner up, and by the time they were finished most of the rest of camp had made their way over – besides Ryan and Adam, who were on watch. Yaz had told them about the surprise earlier, and Adam hadn’t been happy about having to miss the beginning of the party. Ryan, at least, was understanding about needing to keep the watch going, and Yaz promised that she and Tee would take over the next shift like usual so they could also get a chance to join in the festivities. 

“This is such a nice idea, Yaz,” Amy said, grabbing some balloons to blow up. 

“It was Tee’s idea, really,” Yaz said, feeling a bit sheepish that she hadn’t thought of it first. “She’s distracting Bill now, actually. They should be back any minute.” 

As if on cue, she could hear Bill’s raucous laughter coming over the hill. 

“Everyone ready?” Yaz asked quietly, and everyone nodded excitedly.

Tee saw them before Bill did, and she grinned at Yaz before turning back to Bill as everyone shouted “Surprise!” 

Bill looked between everyone, stunned. “For me?” she asked. 

“No, for the other birthday girl,” Yaz said dryly. “Yes, you idiot. It’s for you. And so is this.” She handed Bill the chocolate bar that had somehow survived the journey. “Tee took a bite of one and didn’t die, so it should still be okay.” 

“Better to go by way of poison chocolate than Cyber conversion,” Bill said cheekily, giving a half-shrug. “Thanks, guys. Really.” 

“Tee got you something, too,” Yaz said, looking at the blonde and nodding towards the rucksack. Tee’s eyes lit up, and she reached into the bag and pulled out the mug she’d picked out for Bill. 

“Oh, fuck yeah,” Bill crowed as she took the offered mug. “Thanks, Tee.” 

“Reckon I’ve got something you can fill that up with,” Dan said. “Hold on.” 

He went over to his tent, returning with a bottle filled with a mysterious liquid that Yaz had a feeling was of the alcoholic variety. 

“Dan,” Bill said, her eyes widening. “Is that –” 

“Take a swig and find out,” he said, pouring a bit into her mug. 

“Dan Lewis, I could kiss you.” 

“I thought you were a lesbian,” Tee said, her brows furrowed as she tilted her head curiously. 

Bill laughed. “Figure of speech, babe.” 

Tee’s cheeks went pink. “Oh. Right. Of course.” 

Yaz couldn’t tell if Tee’s flusteredness came from her misunderstanding or from Bill’s use of the pet name, and the thought of the latter being true sent a brief zap of jealousy through her. Sure, Tee had said she wasn’t interested – but that didn’t mean feelings or desires couldn’t change. Bill was an attractive woman, after all. 

“Well, then,” Bill said, looking at everyone and interrupting Yaz’s stewing. “Time to fuckin’ party.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

They had decided to go all out, using precious batteries to power up a small boombox Graham had held onto, along with the Bruce Springsteen CD that was in it. It was the only one they had, but it was still nice to have some sort of music (even with the volume lower than usual so as not to attract too much attention). There may not have been any cake or party lights, but the atmosphere of the camp hadn’t felt so light and free in a very long time. 

Tee had been right; the party was good to boost morale – and it was a nice reminder that no matter what happened next, Yaz knew her camp would be able to weather the storm together. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Bill asked as she came up beside Yaz, who was leaning against the tree near the banner. Yaz, along with Tee, Amy, and Rory had chosen not to partake in the limited supply of mead, which Bill was happy enough about – “more for me”, she’d said, and she was clearly enjoying it judging by the slight wobble she had as she approached. 

Yaz shrugged. “Just thinking about what a nice night this is.” 

Bill grinned. “Yeah. I mean, we are celebrating my birth.” 

Yaz rolled her eyes. “Modest as ever, I see.” 

“You know it.” 

The corner of Yaz’s mouth tugged up into a grin before she grew more solemn again. “Really, though. I think… I think we’re gonna be alright. And maybe Arcadia isn’t real, but it’s at least something to work towards for now.” 

“We’re definitely gonna be alright,” Bill agreed. “But enough shop talk, Yaz. We have more important things to discuss.” 

Yaz’s brows furrowed. “Like what?” 

“Like the fact that you have a crush on Tee.” 

Yaz choked on air. “I’m sorry?” 

“You heard me.” 

Yaz scoffed, trying to hide how flustered Bill’s sure statement made her. “I do not have a crush on Tee.” 

Bill raised an eyebrow, tilting her head. “Okay. Then you won’t mind if I go make a move.” 

Yaz immediately stiffened, the suggestion causing a wave of jealousy to rear its head. 

Bill smirked, and Yaz’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Bill said smugly. 

“Fuck off,” Yaz muttered. 

“C’mon, mate,” Bill said before nodding her head towards where the blonde was sitting, down the hill. “You should go talk to her.” 

“And what exactly am I supposed to say?” 

“I’d probably start with a ‘hello’ of some sort, but that’s just me.” 

“God, you’re such a prick.” 

“That’s why you love me.” 

“Oh, piss off,” Yaz grumbled, rolling her eyes even as she tried not to smile. 

Bill grinned, seeing right through her exaggerated annoyance. “All I’m saying is, you’d better kiss and tell,” she said sweetly, blowing Yaz an exaggerated kiss with her free hand as she walked back over towards Dan – presumably to get a refill. 

Yaz sighed. So maybe Bill was onto something. That still didn’t mean that it was a good idea. 

And yet. 

Before she realised what was happening, Yaz was walking down the hill towards Tee, who looked up as she approached. 

“Mind if I sit with you?” Yaz asked, suddenly feeling shy. 

Tee smiled. “Course you can.” 

Yaz sat, not close enough to where she was touching Tee, but close enough she almost thought she could imagine the feeling of electricity between them. 

“So,” Yaz said awkwardly. “You said you’d never been to a birthday party before?” 

Tee looked at her. “Right,” she said, sounding slightly wary. 

“How’s this shaping up then?” Yaz asked. “Bit of a weird first experience, I’d guess.” 

Tee seemed to relax, a small smile on her face. “It’s nice. Really. I’m not just saying that.” 

“It’s a lot different from how parties used to be,” Yaz said. “Well. Some were like this. But some were a lot more intense. Least that’s what I heard.” 

“Did you not go to any of those?” Tee asked curiously. 

Yaz pressed her lips together, not having intended on revealing that particular bit of information. “Nah. Wasn’t invited.” 

“Why not?” Tee tilted her head. “If I had any sort of party, I’d want you there.” 

Yaz gave a breathy laugh. “I appreciate that.” She hesitated. She hadn’t talked to anyone in years about the bullying she’d endured as a teenager; it had been the darkest years of her life up until the apocalypse happened. “I didn’t really… have a lot of friends. There was this girl, Izzy, and she turned my whole class against me.” 

“That was their loss, then,” Tee said forcefully, and Yaz gave her a grateful smile at her protectiveness. “Their parties were probably lame, anyway.” 

Yaz laughed. “Yeah.” She shrugged. “Besides, from what I heard they were mostly excuses for people to make out or hook up with each other. Playing games like Truth or Dare and the like. That’s not what I wanted my first kiss to be like.” She snorted. “Course, my first kiss still wasn’t great. His name was Danny Biswas, he tasted like stale oatmeal, and I spent the whole time wishing it would just end. Should have figured out sooner that I weren’t straight.” 

Tee went quiet, a longing look on her face. “I’ve never kissed anyone before,” she admitted.

“Never?” Yaz asked, surprised. Not that there was anything wrong with getting to their ages without having done so, of course; she just hadn’t expected that. 

Tee shook her head, and as she met Yaz’s gaze the tension between them shifted into something that took Yaz’s breath away. 

Yaz licked her lips nervously, noting the way Tee’s gaze dropped to her mouth for a split second. Don’t you dare – “Is that something… I mean, do you want to?” Bloody hell. “Because I could. Kiss you, I mean. If you wanted.” 

Tee’s lips parted, and Yaz heard her breathing grow more shallow as she gave a small nod. 

Yaz felt her own heart starting to pound in her chest as she shuffled a bit closer to Tee, leaning in towards her and watching the blonde’s eyelids flutter closed. She could feel Tee’s breath ghosting on her lips when – 

“Oi! It’s you two’s turn for watch!” 

God, she was actually going to kill Adam one of these days. 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

Tee was quiet as they walked along the perimeter, her gaze constantly flickering around the area – but never towards Yaz. Not for the first time, Yaz wished she could know what was going through the blonde’s head. Was she thinking about their almost-kiss? Was she realising that she was actually grateful that Adam had interrupted? 

Of course, the most sensible course of action would be to simply ask Tee, but that meant being vulnerable. Which was… difficult, for Yaz. To put it mildly. 

As they approached the woods near the edge of camp, however, the awkward silence became unbearable. 

“So,” Yaz started, trying to sound casual. “Good first birthday party?” 

“Best I’ve ever been to,” Tee said, deadpan, her cheeks turning pink as she still avoided Yaz’s eyes. 

Yaz snorted. “Funny.” 

A smile tugged at the corner of Tee’s mouth. “I’m such a comedian.” 

“That’s one word for it, I guess,” Yaz teased. 

Tee’s smile grew. “I have another joke.” 

“Oh, yeah?” 

“Why don’t oysters donate to charity?” 

“Why?” 

“Because they’re shellfish.” 

Yaz laughed. “That’s pretty awful. In a good way.” 

“I read it in a book,” Tee admitted bashfully before wrinkling her nose. “Oysters are specifically molluscs, but that doesn’t work as a pun.” 

“No, suppose it doesn’t,” Yaz agreed with a smile. 

Tee responded with a smile of her own, and they continued walking for a bit longer before Yaz finally gathered up her courage. 

“Tee, about the… about what happened earlier –” 

Tee’s eyes went wide, and the look of pure panic on her face made Yaz’s heart sink with rejection. 

And then, time seemed to slow around them. 

Yaz heard the crunch of a twig, looking towards the sound and seeing the glint of a rifle in the moonlight pointing directly at her chest. 

Prentis. 

“Surrender to death,” he said, his voice cold. 

This is it.  

She was about to die. 

Please let Tee survive this.  

She heard the sound of the gunshot, and braced herself for the pain. 

Instead, she found herself hitting the ground, shoved out of the way by Tee. 

Tee, who was now crumpling to the ground. 

Not again.  

Yaz reached for the pistol at her hip, aiming it without a second thought and pulling the trigger. She watched as Prentis fell, her heart pounding as she stared at his lifeless body. 

She was only jerked back into the present by the sound of Tee’s weak moan, and she quickly crawled over to her. 

“Stay with me,” Yaz begged. “Stay with me, Tee. Please.” 

The bullet had hit her in the chest, close to her heart. Way too close. 

She had to get her back to camp. Had to get her to Rory. Rory could help. He had to save her. 

She looked around frantically, waiting to see if Rosanna or Garron were nearby and coming for them. Only the sound of crickets greeted her, and Yaz made a split second decision. She wasn’t sure if it was the best idea to move Tee in her condition, but no way in hell was she going to leave her there to go find Rory. 

Tee didn’t have that much time. 

Gathering Tee in her arms, Yaz managed to lift her, carrying her back towards the centre of camp. 

Having apparently heard the sound of the gunshots, she was met about halfway by everyone, their weapons at the ready. 

“Help me,” Yaz said brokenly. 

“Bill, Dan, Adam, with me to go see if anyone else is on their way here,” Ryan commanded, and Yaz shot him a grateful look that he acknowledged with a brief nod. 

“Graham, I need you to go start a fire,” Rory ordered. “We’ll probably need to cauterise the wound. Amy, can you go get my supplies set up? I’m going to help Yaz get her the rest of the way back.” 

Graham and Amy both hurried off back towards camp, and Rory stepped up to Yaz. 

“You have to save her,” Yaz whispered. 

“I’m going to try,” Rory promised, taking off his shirt and pressing it against Tee’s wound. “I’m gonna hold this here while we walk. Can you carry her the rest of the way?” 

Yaz nodded numbly. 

By the time they made it back to camp, Yaz had never seen Tee so pale. Yaz gently laid her down, trying to keep her own breathing regulated as Rory started looking at the wound. 

“I can see the bullet still lodged in there,” Rory said grimly. “I’m gonna have to dig it out before cauterising it.” 

“Do what you have to do.” Yaz’s throat was tight as she looked at Tee, whose breathing was so shallow Yaz feared it might stop soon. 

Rory nodded. “You might not want to watch this. Talk to her. It might help her get through this.” 

Yaz’s breath was shaky as Rory started reaching for the tools Amy had prepped. “It’s okay, Tee,” she whispered. “It’s gonna be okay.” 

As Rory started his work, the only sign of pain Tee exhibited was a silent stream of tears going down her face. 

Not knowing what else to do, Yaz grabbed Tee’s hand, her skin cool and clammy in Yaz’s own. 

“Stay with me, Tee,” Yaz pleaded. “Come back to me. Stay with me.” 

To Yaz’s surprise, a small smile appeared on Tee’s face. 

“You can pull through this, Tee,” Yaz said, almost a prayer. “You’re strong. You can do this.” 

What seemed like both a lifetime and only a few moments later, Rory’s voice broke through the haze she had found herself in. 

“I’ve done what I can,” he said. “If she survives the night, there’s a good chance she can pull through. But, Yaz… it’s a big if. I can’t lie to you.” 

“She’ll make it,” Yaz said, her throat tight. “She has to.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

Yaz woke to the sound of a low groan. Shooting upright, she turned to see Tee stirring, and her heart leapt into her throat. 

Tee was alive. 

“Tee,” Yaz breathed, blinking a few times to make sure her sleep-deprived brain wasn’t deceiving her. She and Rory had carefully moved her to Yaz’s tent after her makeshift surgery; Yaz had insisted, since she didn’t want to leave Tee’s side through the night. She wasn’t sure when she’d happened to nod off, but knew it had been well into the early hours of the morning. 

Hazel eyes met her own, and Tee gave her a weak smile. “Hiya.” 

Yaz trembled at the sight, almost reaching out to touch her face before thinking better of it. “I thought…” she started as she dropped her hand back down, her throat tightening. “I thought you were going to die. I thought we’d lost you.” 

“Made of strong stuff, me,” Tee said, a hint of forced lightness to her tone. There had to be an element of truth to that – she really did look much better than Yaz thought she would have, given how close she’d come to death. And yet – 

“Don’t,” Yaz said softly, and Tee’s eyes widened a little. “Don’t try to play it off like that. You could have died. You almost did.” Her throat tightened. “You saved my life.”

“I just did what I had to do,” Tee said quietly. “I couldn’t… I couldn’t let that happen.” She paused. “How are you… how are you feeling?” 

Yaz flinched, remembering the sound of Prentis falling to the ground, the sight of the light leaving his eyes. She could still feel the remnants of his presence from her nightmares during her fragmented sleep. “Fine.” 

Tee shook her head. “Don’t,” she said, an echo of the words Yaz had said only moments prior. “You don’t have to pretend with me.” 

Yaz bit her lip, trying to blink back the tears that were springing to her eyes. “I’ve never killed another human before,” she admitted, the words barely more than a whisper. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forget it.” 

“Maybe you shouldn’t,” Tee said. “I think that… it’s part of what makes you human. The guilt. The grief. Cybers can’t feel those things. It’s real, and it’s raw, and it hurts. But it’s so human.”

Yaz swallowed hard. “Thanks, Tee,” she said softly. “I think I needed that.” The reminder that even through all of this, even though the world had gone to shit, humanity persisted. That she was still Yasmin Khan, ex-copper from Sheffield, who loved and lost and grieved and felt . 

“Always,” Tee whispered, and the tension in the tent grew. Yaz thought back to the night before, when she had been so close to kissing Tee. She wondered if that was something Tee might still want to do sometime. 

Wondered if Tee might feel something more for Yaz, the way Yaz was fast realising she did for Tee. 

“Enough about that,” Yaz said lightly, both to Tee and to herself. “Should probably take a look at your wound, see how it’s looking.” 

“I can do it myself,” Tee said abruptly, her demeanour instantly shifting. “You don’t need to worry about it. Been taking care of myself for a long time.” 

“Don’t be silly,” Yaz said, shaking her head. “You saved my life. The least I can do is take care of you in return. You don’t need to be brave for me.” 

“I can do it myself,” Tee repeated, anxiety rolling off her body in waves. “Seriously. It’s fine.”  

Yaz frowned, a sense of unease starting to make its way through her body. “Why are you being so weird, Tee?” 

“M’not being weird.” 

“Yes, you are,” Yaz said, her frown deepening. “Let me take a look at it. We probably need to change your dressing.” 

Tee’s jaw was clenched, her body stiff as Yaz reached for her. When she didn’t protest, Yaz moved the blanket aside, wincing as she saw the bandage, crusted with dried blood. 

“I’ll be as careful as I can,” Yaz said softly, and Tee remained silent. That uneasy feeling was back with a vengeance, and Yaz tried to ignore it. This was just Tee, after all. 

Yaz lifted Tee’s bandage, and her heart stopped. 

Chapter Text

The world as she knew it was falling apart. 

“What the fuck are you?” 

Tee flinched, both at the words themselves and even more so the way in which Yaz said them. She could hear the fear, the pain, the hurt in her voice, and she wanted more than anything to be able to make things better. 

“Yaz –” Tee reached out a hand, and Yaz jerked away. 

“Don’t fucking touch me,” she hissed. 

“Yaz, please,” Tee said, panic gripping her chest like a vise. “You have to believe me, I –” 

“You’re a fucking Cyber.” 

She’d wondered, what seemed like so long ago now, how Yaz would look at her when she found out Tee wasn’t human. 

And it was so much more painful than she could have ever imagined. 

“I’m – I mean, not exactly,” Tee tried, Yaz’s look of disgust growing. “I don’t know, I –”

“You’re a part of Division.” 

Tee stilled, her mouth snapping shut. 

The final nail in the coffin. Was she a Cyber, technically? She wasn’t sure. She certainly felt more than any of the others could, emotionally speaking. 

But working for Division, for Tecteun… 

That was something that she couldn’t deny.

“Yes,” she finally whispered. 

In the midst of Yaz’s fury, Tee saw a flicker of what seemed to be devastation flash across her face, and it felt like a knife to her stomach. 

“I didn’t mean for –” Tee started, feeling like her own heart was breaking in two. 

“Didn’t mean for what? To get caught?” Yaz asked sharply. “Yeah, I’m sure you didn’t.” 

“I –” 

“Enough.” Yaz’s voice was cold, unyielding. “Rory! Ryan!” 

“Yaz, please –” 

“You don’t get to call me that,” Yaz hissed. 

“Please, just let me –”

“Yaz? Is everything okay? Is she –” The flap of the tent opened, and Tee saw Rory’s jaw drop as he saw her. “Holy shit.” 

Ryan was more quick to recover, immediately reaching for his gun and pointing it directly at Tee. 

“I think we’ve already established that a gun won’t do much to her – it,” Yaz said roughly. 

Tee flinched as if she had been slapped, and for a moment she thought she saw a flash of regret on Yaz’s face. If it had even existed, it soon disappeared as Yaz turned to look at Rory. “Go get the strongest ropes we have. We’ll keep her at the tree until… until we figure out what to do next.” 

Rory nodded, maneuvering around Ryan – who was still pointing the gun at Tee – to leave the tent. 

“Don’t try to run,” Yaz warned. “I’m sure a gun wouldn’t kill you, but a bullet to the head probably wouldn’t feel very good.” 

“I’m not going to run,” Tee said quietly, looking at Yaz, her heart aching. Would Yaz be able to command such an act of violence? Would Ryan be able to do it? Even if she already had no plans to run, she didn’t want to find out. “And I’m not going to hurt any of you.” 

“And why the hell should I believe you?” Yaz asked, her jaw clenched, a stone fortress in her eyes. 

“Because you know me.” Tee held Yaz’s gaze, hoping that her eyes could convey all the things she couldn’t say.

Would you have actually killed him? 

If it meant keeping you safe… yes. 

For a moment, she thought Yaz might relent. Thought that the last twenty minutes might be somewhat undone, that they could talk and Tee could try and fix things. 

And then the fortress doors closed. 

“No,” Yaz said flatly. “I don’t think I do.” 

Tee swallowed hard, clenching her jaw to keep from trembling. 

What have I done? 

What am I doing?  

She should be worrying about the fact that she’d compromised her mother’s mission. What sort of punishment would Tecteun have in store? It wouldn’t be good; that much was for certain. 

Instead, all she could think about was Yaz. 

Yaz, who might as well have been miles away even though they were in the same tent. That distance, that feeling of loss… it hurt worse than any of the experiments Tee had been the subject of. 

It wasn’t long before Rory returned with the ropes, and Tee willingly let her wrists be tied together as he led her to the tree at the centre of camp, Ryan following behind with his gun still pointed at her. More than anything, Tee could feel the weight of Yaz’s gaze on her as they walked. 

“Guys? What the hell is going on? Why is Tee –” Tee watched as Bill stopped short in front of them, clearly seeing that Tee’s wound had healed. “Holy fucking shit.” 

“Go get everyone else,” Yaz said tersely. “We need to have a meeting.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

“We can’t just leave her –” 

“ It lied to us.” 

“How do we know –” 

“You saw what that bullet did to it. And look at it now.” 

“Is ‘it’ really –” 

“She saved our lives. More than once.” 

“– was going to lead us right into Division’s lair –” 

“We can’t trust it.” 

“We shouldn’t –” 

The cacophony of overlapping voices was nearly making Tee dizzy. Her identity was tearing the camp apart, and all she could do was sit in front of the tree she had been bound to, watching. 

At least, she mused, they had decided to let her sit. Her tailbone would still be sore after awhile, but it was much more comfortable than standing, even if she could have withstood it. 

She tried not to take the small gesture as more than it was, tried not to hope that it meant there was still a chance she could somehow earn a chance at forgiveness. 

Which was ridiculous. She knew just how much Division had affected every single one of these people’s lives; Tee’s betrayal was something that would not be easily forgiven nor forgotten. Besides, she really should be thinking about the wrath of Tecteun that she was sure to face – if the camp didn’t decide to kill her. 

The thought of that – that it was indeed a possibility – sent a chill down her spine. 

She didn’t want to die. 

“ Enough. ” Yaz’s voice rang out, instantly silencing everyone else and jerking Tee’s attention back to the present moment. “Nothing is going to be figured out if everyone keeps yelling over each other.” 

“What is there to figure out?” Adam said, and Tee grew even more nervous. He was clearly the most hostile at this moment, his anger palpable. “It’s a fucking Cyber. In any other situation, it would have already lost its head.” 

“Stop calling her an it,” Bill said sharply. “She’s clearly not a typical Cyber. We can’t just kill her. Especially while not having a lot of information.” 

“Are you fucking serious?” Adam asked incredulously, looking to Yaz. “You’re seriously gonna consider letting it live, Yaz?” 

Yaz’s gaze flickered over to Tee, and Tee’s heart started to race. Yaz’s face was impassive, unreadable. “I don’t know,” she finally said. “I think we all have a lot to consider.” 

“A lot to consider,” Adam repeated, scoffing. “Of course the fucking dyke brigade are too starry-eyed to do what we need to do.” 

Tee nearly broke out of her restraints right then and there, ready to punch him, when Ryan stepped in front of him. “What the fuck did you just say?” 

Adam shrank back the tiniest bit before lifting his chin defiantly. “It’s true. They’re both compromised. They’re endangering the camp.” 

“I don’t give a fuck what you think they’re doing,” Ryan said, his voice harsher and more dangerous than Tee had ever heard from him before. Ryan had always been a gentle sort, but there was no kindness in his face as he loomed over Adam. “Say that word again. I dare you.” 

The tension in the air was so thick that it was suffocating as Ryan and Adam stared each other down, the rest of the camp anxiously watching and waiting to see what would happen. 

“Whatever,” Adam finally muttered. “I just think it should be up to the group as a whole. We should have a vote.” 

“I agree,” Rory said, and Adam shot him a surprised look – as did the rest of camp, including Amy. “Everyone should have a say.” 

“Then so should Tee,” Bill said. “She deserves the right to defend herself.” 

Dan nodded in agreement. “I think that’s fair. Due process or whatever.” 

“That’s for humans ,” Adam said coldly. “It’s clearly not one.” 

“She – it – whatever. Clearly Thirteen is a sentient being… thing,” Amy interjected. “I agree with Dan and Bill.” 

Tee watched as Rory looked at Amy, a silent battle of wills between the two of them. Finally, Rory shrugged as he turned to Yaz. 

“A trial, then,” Graham, who had been silent up until this point, said. His gaze flickered over to Tee, an unreadable expression on his face. 

“Alright.” Tee turned to look at Yaz as she spoke, but the woman was resolutely not returning her gaze. “A trial. But we’ll hold it this afternoon. I think everyone needs a chance to cool off, get their heads on straight before we make any decisions.” 

Tee watched as the camp murmured and nodded their agreements, some (namely, Adam) more reluctantly than others. 

“Adam, Graham, I believe it’s your turn for patrol,” Yaz continued. “And Dan, a word, please.” 

Yaz’s dismissal was obvious, and everyone scattered for the time being. Tee watched as Dan went over to Yaz, the two of them engaging in a quiet conversation – so quiet, that even Tee couldn’t hear it over the rustling of the wind. After a few moments, Dan nodded, and Yaz walked away. It wasn’t too much of a surprise to Tee when Dan came over to her; she didn’t think that Yaz would be willing to leave her unattended. 

Even if, as she’d said before, she had no plans to run. 

“Alright, then?” Dan asked as he stood near her, his gun strapped to his hip. Tee simply stared at him for a moment, and Dan let out a sigh. “No, suppose you’re not, are you?” 

Tee shrugged as much as she could considering how they’d tied her up. Her hands were still tied together and pinned behind her back; they’d then wrapped more rope around her torso as well to secure her to the tree. It definitely wasn’t comfortable, and she could feel her hands going numb, but it was far from the most pain she’d ever been in. 

There was silence for awhile before Tee hesitantly spoke up. “Why did Yaz – Yasmin – pick you to watch me?” 

Dan shrugged. “Guess she figured I’m one of the least likely to kill you while she’s gone.” 

“Oh.” Tee swallowed hard. “Is she…” 

Dan tilted his head. “Is she what?”

“Is she going to be back for the trial?” Tee asked, hating how vulnerable she sounded. 

“Reckon so,” Dan said. “Think she just needs a bit of space to clear her head.” 

“Right,” Tee said, her voice sounding hollow even to her own ears.  

Tee wasn’t sure how long the silence between them lasted before she spoke again. “You don’t seem to be very…” she trailed off, trying to find the right word. “Surprised, I guess. That I’m a… that I’m not human.” 

Dan looked at her. “I mean, it kinda makes sense,” he finally said. “No offense.” 

Tee scrunched her nose. Apparently, she hadn’t been quite as good at blending in as she’d thought. “None taken, I guess.” 

“So what are you, then?” Dan asked curiously. “If you don’t mind me asking. I mean, you look human. None of that creepy silver-eyes stuff.” 

“I don’t know, exactly,” Tee answered honestly. “I’ve always been… different. S’long as I can remember.” She fought against flashbacks of her childhood, of all the pain she’d felt during her mother’s experiments. 

Dan tilted his head, studying her. “You could probably bust out of here any time you wanted, couldn’t you?” he asked quietly. 

Tee exhaled a bitter sort of laugh. “Yeah.” 

“Then why don’t you?” 

Tee thought of Yaz’s warm brown eyes, of how they’d looked at her the night before. 

Of how they’d looked at her today. 

It didn’t make any sense. It went against her entire mission, against everything she’d been raised to do. But knowing that she’d hurt Yaz, that she’d been the cause of all that pain in her eyes today… Tee had to fix it. Wanted to fix it. 

God, she wanted. 

“Guess I just don’t feel like it,” Tee said, giving a half-hearted shrug. 

There were a few moments of silence. Dan pressed his lips together, as if deciding whether or not to speak. Eventually, he did. “She likes you, you know. Yaz.” 

Tee felt another wave of sadness and regret wash over her. “I like her, too,” she said quietly. “Don’t think that matters anymore, though.” 

Dan shook his head. “No,” he said slowly. “I mean, she likes you.” 

Tee furrowed her brows, her confusion beginning to turn to frustration. “I don’t understand what you’re saying, Dan.” She was sure that at this point, Yaz hated her. 

Dan studied her for a moment. “You really don’t, do you?” He sighed. “I mean, she likes you as more than just a friend.” 

Tee stilled. 

Because I could. Kiss you, I mean. If you wanted.  

But that was just Yaz feeling bad for her, wasn’t it? Wanting to let her have an experience that it seemed nearly every other person had. 

Not that she was a person, clearly. Was she? Everything was so confusing and her head was spinning and she couldn’t breathe and – 

“Easy, Tee,” she heard Dan say, his voice calm and reassuring. “Look at me. Try and match my breath, okay?” 

Tee fought to meet his eyes, trying to focus on what colour they were. Blue? Light green? Maybe a bit of both. Okay. Right. Breathing. In, hold, out. In, hold, out. 

“Yeah,” Dan said softly, once it was clear that Tee was going to be okay. “I thought so.” 

“Thought what?” Tee asked warily, still focusing on keeping her breathing steady. 

“You like her, too.” 

Yes, Tee wanted to say. We already established that.  

But she knew that wasn’t what he meant. 

She liked Yaz. 

The truth of Dan’s words, of her own damned feelings, hit her like a tidal wave. 

“I can’t,” Tee said, her voice barely more than a whisper, her words both a statement and a plea. 

“What do you mean?” Dan asked. 

“Because,” Tee said, shaking her head. “It’s not… it’s not what I was made for. I’m not built to… to feel things like that.” 

Dan looked at her for a moment, studying her for a while before he finally spoke. “Maybe you’re a little more human than you think.” 

Tee stared at him, stunned at the simplicity with which he said those words. 

Rather than wait for a response, Dan stood up and pulled over a nearby chair before taking a seat. 

Tee leaned back against the tree, Dan’s words on a constant loop in her mind. What did it mean, to be human? Was she, like Dan had suggested she might be, at least a little bit? Could she be? 

She knew so little about her origins, about how she’d become the way she was. What Tecteun had done to her. Had she been human, before? Converted like the other Cybers, but differently? But then how had she grown up? 

Why couldn’t she remember ? 

She clenched her eyes shut as a sudden pounding took root in her head. 

Breathe. In, hold, out. In, hold, out. 

Slowly, the pain started to ease, and Tee felt a wave of relief – one that lasted all too briefly as she remembered what the rest of the day held. 

In a matter of hours, the camp would be coming together to decide her fate. 

In a matter of hours, she could be dead.  

Chapter Text

Yaz ran. 

Her chest was heaving, her head spinning as her feet pounded along the forest floor. She wasn’t sure where she was heading; all she knew was that she needed to get as far away from camp as possible. 

As far away from Tee as possible. 

Thirteen , she reminded herself as she ran. Thirteen. The Cyber who had infiltrated their camp. The Cyber who Yaz had thought she was beginning to – 

No. 

Yaz fell to the ground, tasting blood. She fought the urge to retch, willing her stomach to settle and her heartbeat to slow. When she started to feel more human again, she looked up, her throat tightening as she realised where she was. 

The meadow. 

The same spot where she’d held Sonya, where she’d felt the last breath leave her sister’s lungs. 

“You have to kill me, do it, now! You promised!”  

Yaz touched the ground. If she focused, she would have sworn she could still feel the dampness of the earth from where Sonya’s blood had spilled. 

She let out a choked sob, clutching the grass in her fists. 

“Do it, Yaz! Please!”

“I can’t,” Yaz whispered brokenly, feeling the hot tears starting to stream down her face. There was no stopping them now; she’d run away from her feelings for far too long. 

Now, they demanded to be felt. 

“I can’t,” Yaz repeated, her voice quiet and shaking. “I can’t do this.” 

“Sure you can, loser.”  

Yaz froze at the sound of Sonya’s voice coming from behind her. 

“Sonya?” she whispered, not daring to turn around lest she shatter the illusion. 

“The one and only.”  

Yaz let out a strangled laugh that resembled more of a sob. I’m going crazy. I’ve finally fucking lost it. “Why are you here?” 

“I could ask you the same thing,” Sonya said dryly. “Thought I told you to let me go.” 

“You didn’t say that exactly,” Yaz mumbled. 

“You know what I meant.” 

Yaz clenched her jaw, knowing that her sister – or her subconscious, as it were, because Yaz surely didn’t believe in ghosts – was right. 

“I didn’t mean to come here,” Yaz finally said. “It just… happened.” 

“You’re running.” A statement, not a question. 

“I’m fine.” Yaz’s response was immediate, instinctual. 

“You’re full of shit, is what you are.” 

Yaz’s eyes narrowed. Her subconscious had her sister’s voice down pat, that was for sure. “Am not.” 

“Yaz.” Sonya’s voice was filled with sadness. 

“I’m fine,” Yaz repeated, her voice wavering as she tried to pretend. “I’m…” She let out a shaky breath. 

“It’s okay, Yaz.”  

“It’s not okay,” Yaz said vehemently, shaking her head. “Nothing is okay, Sonya. You don’t understand anything .” 

“Alright,” Sonya said softly. Placatingly. Yaz bristled. “But it’s not going to get better if you keep running from it.”  

“Running from what, exactly?” Yaz said, bitterness coating her voice like honey. 

“I think you know . ”  

“No, Sonya, I don’t,” Yaz said sharply, her heartbeat quickening, her body recognising the truth of Sonya’s words even as her brain fought against it. 

“I think you’re just afraid to say it, even to yourself.” 

“ Enough, ” Yaz said through gritted teeth. “Stop it.” 

“You can say it, Yaz,” Sonya said gently. “It’s okay.”  

All the feelings Yaz had been repressing for the last year – the guilt, the rage, the devastation – rose to the surface, crashing against the walls she’d so carefully built around them. 

“It was your fault,” Yaz cried out, turning to face Sonya’s voice. 

Instead of her sister, though, she saw only Ryan. 

Ryan, who was standing there facing her, a desolate expression on his face. 

Yaz couldn’t stop the dam from breaking, couldn’t stop the heaving sobs that wracked her body. She didn’t even realise that Ryan had moved closer until she felt his presence next to her. 

“I heard her,” Yaz managed to get out between choked breaths. “She was here.” 

“Oh, Yaz,” Ryan said, his face softening in understanding. 

“She… she was…” 

“It wasn’t her,” Ryan said gently. “Sonya’s gone, Yaz.” 

“I know,” Yaz said, her breath shaky. “But she sounded so real.” 

Ryan waited a moment before responding. “I dream about her sometimes, you know,” he finally said. “And I wake up, and it feels so real that I think I’ll walk over to the food station for breakfast and see her ribbing Dan about having canned peaches again. And every time…” He pressed his lips together, trailing off. 

Yaz sat in silence, unsure of anything she could possibly say to give Ryan some comfort. After all, what comfort was to be had right now? All Yaz could see was desolate wasteland around them, memories of happier times that were fading with every second.  

After a few moments, Ryan sighed. “Wasn’t sure you’d be here, you know. I looked for you here first. On the… on the anniversary.” 

“Figured someone would. That’s why I went to the lake,” Yaz gave a half-shrug. “Easier that way.” 

Ryan pressed his lips together, as if deciding whether or not to speak. “You know, Yaz,” he said hesitantly. “You don’t have to go through this alone. You can talk to me.” 

Yaz swallowed hard. How could she explain to Ryan that the thought of talking about it, of giving voice to any more of the thoughts in her head, filled her with a paralysing sense of dread and fear? 

If she talked about it, it was real. If she talked about it, she had to feel it. 

And that… she wasn’t sure she could survive that. 

“I don’t know how,” she finally whispered. 

Ryan considered her words. “Maybe,” he started slowly. “You could start by trying to tell me what you meant earlier. When you said ‘it was your fault’.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together. Ryan waited patiently, giving her all the time she needed. 

“I was talking to Sonya,” Yaz finally admitted quietly. “Or… her ghost. My subconscious. Whatever she was.” She swallowed hard. “She was pushing me to… to stop running. To say what it was I was really feeling.” 

“And what is that, exactly?” Ryan asked gently, encouraging her to keep going. 

Yaz let out a shuddering breath, the words feeling caught in her throat even as they begged to be released. “I’m so angry , Ryan,” she finally managed to get out. “I’m so angry that it scares me, and I push it down because I don’t want to be scared, and…” She inhaled shakily. “I feel like such an awful, awful person.” 

“That’s not true, Yaz,” Ryan said, shaking his head. “You’re grieving. It makes sense that you’re feeling this way.” 

“You don’t understand,” Yaz said quietly. “Sometimes, I… I feel like I hate her. For running off like that.” Another tear fell down her face. “For leaving me.” 

Ryan’s face softened. “Yaz -” 

“She left me,” Yaz said, the words tumbling out like a dam had been broken. “She left me here, alone, and now all I have are these feelings that I don’t know how to live with. I feel like I’m crumbling, Ryan, and it takes everything I have to wake up every day and keep my promise to her to keep going.” 

Ryan pressed his lips together, looking like he was trying to hold back tears himself. “Yaz,” he said, his voice wavering a little. “Why didn’t you say it was getting that bad again? I could have -” 

Yaz let out a bitter laugh. “I’ve spent the last year pushing you away, Ryan. I blamed you because it was the easy thing to do. I didn’t - I don’t - deserve anything like that from you.” 

“It’s not about deserving, Yaz,” Ryan said softly. “No matter what’s happened between us, you’re still my best friend. And I love you. I never want you to feel like you’re in that darkness alone.” 

Yaz couldn’t stop the tears that fell down her face. ‘Ryan…” 

“The world is already lonely enough,” Ryan said simply. “You don’t have to push me away, Yaz. Or any of us. This camp… you’re the heart of it. And I’m not saying that to put pressure on you - I’m saying it to let you know how important you are. To all of us. You are so, so loved, Yaz.” 

Yaz felt her lip trembling as she gave Ryan a small smile. She took in a deep breath, overwhelmed by the emotion of the moment. “Maybe not by Adam,” she said lightly, trying to ease the intensity of it all. 

Ryan laughed. “Fair enough. Can’t imagine he gives much of a shit about any of us, other than the fact there’s safety in numbers.” 

“Yeah,” Yaz said with a huffed laugh before the mood grew somber once more. She looked  down at her hands, swallowing hard. “It should have been me,” she said quietly. “She should still be here. I should have protected her.”

Ryan took in a deep breath before pressing his lips together. “She’s not here anymore,” he finally said, his voice gentle but firm. “But you are. And you can’t keep blaming yourself for what happened. The only ones to blame are Division.” 

The mention of Division immediately made Yaz think of Tee again. Tee, who had betrayed them. Betrayed her . The entire time they’d known each other, Tee had been lying about her very existence. Would she have ever confessed it to Yaz, if her ability to heal quickly hadn’t exposed her? She had almost let Yaz kiss her. Was that all part of her plan to get them to Arcadia? Was she really so cold-hearted, so ruthless? How could Yaz have been so blind?

“You’re right,” Yaz said, her throat going dry. “Cybers killed her. And now I’ve let one into our camp.” 

“Yaz…” Ryan sighed, pressing his lips together. “Tee… she’s not like the others. And we both know it.” 

“She’s not human.” 

“She’s not,” Ryan agreed. “Not fully, anyway, at least. But she’s also not a monster.” 

“She works for Division,” Yaz said, shaking her head. “How can she not be?” 

“We really don’t know anything about that, Yaz,” Ryan said gently. “Who’s to say she hasn’t been forced to be part of it? That she’s been brainwashed?” 

Yaz let out an exasperated sigh. “Why are you on her side?” 

“I didn’t say that,” Ryan said, shaking his head. “I just think we need to have all the facts. You and I know more than anyone else in this camp what it’s like to be judged before someone even knows anything about us.” He shrugged. “Can’t say Cyber-ism or whatever we wanna call it is the same as racism, but. You know. Similar principles, I guess.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together.

“All I’m saying is, maybe try to go into this trial with an open mind,” Ryan continued. “See what she has to say for herself. It’s the least we can do for everything she’s done for us.” 

Everything she’s done for us has been nothing but manipulation, Yaz wanted to say. She wanted us to trust her so she could destroy us.  

But was that true? Was Yaz really such a poor judge of character? She’d trusted Tee. More than anything, against her better judgment, she wanted to believe that there was some sort of explanation. That maybe even though Tee had been on a Division mission, she had changed her mind somewhere along the way. 

Was she letting her heart speak louder than her brain? Maybe. 

Yaz sighed. “We should probably get back to camp.” she said finally, deciding not to respond to Ryan’s suggestion. “There’s nothing else here for us.” 

Ryan pressed his lips together for a moment before apparently deciding to let it go. He looked around, taking in a deep breath. “Right. It’s well creepy here, now. Feels so… empty.” 

Yaz swallowed hard. He was right. Sonya’s presence – or whatever you wanted to call it – was long gone. There was nothing here but the wind blowing through the nearby trees and the ache of time long past. 

Ryan stood, holding out his hand to Yaz. After a moment’s hesitation, she took it, letting him help lift her up. 

“So,” Ryan said, his voice sounding somehow both teasing and vulnerable. “Are we hugging now, or…?” 

Without thinking about it, Yaz threw herself forward, wrapping her arms around him and feeling him embrace her in return. She’d almost forgotten what it was like, to be so physically close to another person. To feel safe, even for so brief a time. 

She’d missed her best friend. 

After a few moments, Yaz finally pulled back. “C’mon,” she said, tilting her head back towards the direction of camp as her anxiety came rushing back, leaving her with a sense of nausea. “We have a trial to hold.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

When they got back to camp, the tension in the air was so thick that it felt suffocating. Once everyone had realised Yaz and Ryan were back, they had all quickly made their way to the centre of camp. While it made Yaz uneasy to have no one watching the perimeter, she knew that this was something the entire camp needed to be present for. 

“Right,” Yaz said as everyone looked at her expectantly. She glanced at Tee, whose face seemed rather flushed as she averted her gaze. “We all know why we’re here, I guess.”

“I don’t,” Adam unsurprisingly muttered. “Seems like a waste of time.” 

“I’m aware you think so, Adam,” Yaz said tersely. “But we’ve not lost our humanity yet. She deserves a chance to speak, and that’s what she’ll get.” 

Adam’s jaw clenched, but he remained silent. 

Yaz waited a moment before turning to the tree where Tee still remained tied up. The blonde was still barely meeting her eyes, her gaze darting nervously over to Dan. Yaz’s brows furrowed. Had something happened while Dan had been watching her? “I’m afraid we need to keep you there for now. Until we decide what… what happens next.” 

Tee nodded, her lips pressed together tightly. 

“Alright,” Yaz said, swallowing hard as a myriad of emotions swirled around inside her. “Now is your chance to speak, T– Thirteen.” Was that a flash of pain on the blonde’s face? Yaz felt like her head was going to explode. She was angry at Tee. She felt betrayed. She was hurt. Why was Tee’s pain causing her own heart to ache? 

No. Never mind the fact she wasn’t ready to forgive her; she needed to get answers. Not just for herself, but for the safety of the camp. 

“What do you want to know?” Tee asked, her voice sounding flat and empty. 

So much, Yaz thought. Like, was everything between us truly a lie? 

“Who are you? Really?” Yaz asked instead. 

“Or what , rather,” Rory said, his face impassive. “I patched you up. You bleed like a human, but clearly you’re not.” 

Tee swallowed hard. “I don’t know, for sure,” she finally said. “Honestly. I know I’ve been like this as long as I can remember. I know I have the speed, strength, and other abilities of a Cyber. But I also know that I… I feel. Things.” Again, she looked at Dan, and Yaz frowned. “I don’t know if there’s a name for what I am.” 

“But you are a product of Division,” Amy said, tilting her head. “Right?” 

“I… I was raised there, yes.” 

“You were a child?” Graham asked, his brows furrowed. 

Tee looked at him warily. “Yes.” 

“How would that even work? Cybers are frozen at whatever age they were converted. Are you saying you were never actually converted?” Ryan asked. 

Tee lifted her chin. “I told you, I’ve always been this way.” 

It made sense, in a way; there had been no scar when Yaz had checked her that day they’d first met. 

But on the other hand, they’d never heard of anything like this before. If it was true, Tee was basically the definition of impossible. 

“ If that’s true,” Amy said warily. “What else is Division capable of? What else do they have planned?” 

“I -” Tee broke off, her expression morphing into one of pain. “I don’t know.” 

“It doesn’t seem to know much of anything,” Adam spat, cold anger on his face as he looked at Tee. “And I’m calling bullshit.” 

“I swear,” Tee said, her voice strained. “All I know is that I was meant to get you all to find the compass to lead us all to Arcadia. I don’t even know where it is without the compass. Every time I try to remember more, it -” She broke off, an agonised expression on her face once more. “It hurts.” 

Yaz stared at Tee, torn once again between her instinct to comfort and her anger at the blonde’s betrayal. It didn’t look like Tee was faking the pain she was in. 

But then, it hadn’t seemed like she’d been lying to them for the last several weeks, either. 

“Fuck this. I’ve heard enough.” Yaz turned at the sound of Adam’s voice, her heart jumping into her throat as her body realised before her brain what Adam was doing. Before she could say anything, his hand was reaching for his hip, grabbing his gun and pointing it at Tee’s head.

Chapter Text

If Tee never had a gun pointed at her again, it would be too soon. 

Although at this moment, she almost wished that Adam would pull the trigger - and moreso, that it would actually do something, just so she never had to see Yaz look at her again with such anger, such hurt. 

Not to mention the fact that the more she tried to answer the camp’s questions, the more she tried to think about Division, the more intense her splitting headache became.

Whether it was the physical pain she was in or her mental state, Tee didn’t even try to move from where she was bound against the tree. She took in a deep breath, closing her eyes and waiting for whatever came next. 

“ Enough. ” 

Tee opened her eyes again, her heart racing as she saw Yaz standing between her and Adam. 

No.

She wanted to believe that Adam wouldn’t pull the trigger on one of his own camp. But there was a wild anger in his eyes, one that frightened Tee. 

At this point, she didn’t know what he was capable of. 

She tensed, ready to break free and put herself in front of Yaz again, when she saw Dan shake his head at her out of the corner of her eye. She turned to him, her eyes wide in disbelief. His mouth was set firm, and he was clearly tense, but he shook his head slightly again. 

As much as it went against every instinct in Tee’s body, she forced herself to sit still, to wait out whatever was about to happen. 

“Are you really going to protect this… this thing ?” Adam hissed as he kept the gun pointed straight at Yaz. 

“As far as I’m aware, this camp has not come to a verdict regarding Thirteen’s fate,” Yaz said coolly. 

Adam’s face was twisted with pure hatred. “This camp,” he said, his voice low. “Doesn’t have the guts to do what needs to be done.” 

“This camp,” Yaz repeated, her voice more dangerous than Tee had ever heard it before. “Does not condone murder.” 

Adam stared Yaz down, his jaw clenched. After a few tense moments, he lowered his gun. “You’re gonna regret this,” he said coldly, looking around at the rest of the group. No one made a sound or dared to move. “All of you.” 

Before Yaz could respond, Adam stalked off towards the direction of his tent. She watched him go until he was out of eyesight, letting out a breath she didn’t realise she’d been holding. 

“Yaz,” Ryan said, and Tee jerked her head towards him. “What are we going to do about him?” 

“Nothing,” Yaz answered, clearly tense. “Not right this second, anyway. We still have a decision to make.” 

Tee’s breath caught in her throat as Yaz turned to look at her. If she was about to die, she thought, at least she would get one more look at Yaz’s face. 

“Where is the compass?” Yaz asked, and Tee blinked in surprise. 

“What?” 

“The compass you’re supposed to lead us to,” Yaz said. “You said it was in Sheffield. Where, exactly?” 

Tee knew that this was the most valuable information she had. Knew that if she gave it to them, there wouldn’t be much reason to keep her alive. They could go find the compass themselves and do - well, whatever it was that Yaz seemed to be planning. 

And yet, she couldn’t find it in her to lie to Yaz. 

Not again. 

“It's in the old Peace Gardens,” Tee said quietly. 

Yaz went stiff, and Tee saw both Ryan and Graham shoot tense looks her way. If Yaz sensed them, she showed no sign of it, instead staying focused on Tee. 

“How do we know it’s not a trap?” Rory asked warily. “Arcadia itself is, obviously. Why even do this compass business in the first place?” 

Tee had been wondering that herself, honestly. Tecteun was powerful; if she’d wanted to, she could have unleashed hell on this camp already. 

Rory was right. Why? 

“I don’t know,” Tee answered, her brow furrowed. “She… she never gave me a reason, just told me my mission.” 

“Who?” Yaz asked. “Who is ‘she’?” 

Tee looked at Yaz, her lips pressed together. She knew she’d already revealed too much information, but there was a hint of desperation in Yaz’s eyes that was impossible to ignore. 

“Tecteun,” Tee whispered. “Her name is Tecteun.” 

Yaz stood motionless, simply staring at Tee as Ryan spoke. 

“Tecteun? What kind of name is that?” 

“One she chose,” Tee said, gritting her teeth against the headache creeping up once more. “Tech, as in technology. Teun , meaning ‘highly praiseworthy’.” She remembered the day her mother had explained her name, how she had grown Division into the entity it now was. She had been so proud of the work she’d done; even then, it had made Tee uneasy - a feeling she had buried deep in the recesses of her mind. 

“Not full of herself at all, then,” Amy said sarcastically. 

“She did bring about the end of the world,” Ryan said. “Maybe not praiseworthy, but definitely powerful.” 

“You have no idea,” Tee said, both a warning and a plea as she looked at Yaz. She wasn’t sure exactly what the woman was planning, but she had a feeling it involved the destruction of Division. 

And that… it couldn’t be anything but a suicide mission. Tee knew Tecteun; there wasn’t anything that woman wouldn’t do to see her vision for the earth fulfilled. 

She would kill Yaz without a second thought.

“Is she like you?” Bill asked curiously. 

Tee shook her head. “I’m the only one, as far as I’m aware. She’s human.” 

Rory and Amy exchanged glances. “Easier to kill than a Cyber, then,” Rory mused. 

Tee stiffened, and Yaz’s gaze flickered over to her, eyes narrowing slightly.  

“No one said anything about murder,” Dan said warily. 

“Dan’s right,” Yaz agreed, and Rory’s lips pressed together. “Besides, that’s not what we’re discussing right now.” 

She looked back at Tee, whose heart started racing in her chest again. 

“She’s dangerous,” Amy said after a moment of silence. “We all know that, right?” 

“Everyone is, given the right circumstances,” Bill replied, sounding more serious than Tee had ever heard her. “I don’t know about you guys, but I wouldn’t have it in me to pull the trigger.” 

“Me either,” Graham said quietly, and Ryan nodded in agreement beside him. 

“Dan?” Yaz asked, looking towards the older man. 

Dan looked at Tee, and she swallowed hard. Maybe you’re a little more human than you think.  

“I vote that she lives.” 

Yaz’s face was impassive. “Amy? Rory?” 

The couple looked at each other, a silent conversation visible between them. Finally, Rory turned back to Yaz. “What are we gonna do with her? If we let her go, she can just bring Division straight back to us.” 

“She’s not going anywhere,” Yaz said, looking at Tee. “If she wanted to, she already could have. Isn’t that right?” 

Tee pressed her lips together, feeling her blood rush to her cheeks. “Yes,” she admitted quietly. 

“Why haven’t you?” Amy asked, her eyes piercing as she looked at Tee. 

Tee swallowed hard, her gaze flickering to Dan, who was watching her impassively. “I don’t…” Tee started, taking in a deep breath. “I should. But I don’t want to hurt any of you.” 

“A Cyber with a conscience,” Rory said, almost disbelievingly. “Not something you see every day.” 

“Sounds like we’re in agreement, then,” Bill said, pointedly ignoring Rory. “Right, Yaz?” 

Yaz pressed her lips together, her face frustratingly neutral. Tee wished she would look at her again, that she could read any of the emotions she was sure Yaz was hiding under the surface. Was she relieved at the camp’s decision? Angry? 

“Sounds like it,” Yaz said, and Tee let out a breath she didn’t realise she’d been holding. She turned to Tee, and for a fraction of a second Tee thought she saw the mask Yaz wore falter. 

“Ryan, cut her loose,” Yaz said coolly, the moment gone all too soon. 

Tee held Yaz’s gaze as she felt the ropes loosen and fall to the ground. She stayed still, not daring to move a muscle. 

“I want to talk to her,” Yaz said, and Tee’s heartbeat quickened. “Alone.” 

Tee expected at least one person to object, to insist that someone else needed to stay for Yaz’s safety. Instead, the camp quickly dispersed, going back to whatever it was they had been doing before all hell had broken loose. 

“Walk with me.” Yaz’s tone left no room for discussion as she turned and started walking off, not even looking behind her to see if Tee was following, as if she was sure the blonde would do exactly what she was told. 

Tee wanted to be annoyed at the fact that Yaz was right - she had immediately obeyed the order and quickly caught up with the brunette - but all she could think about was the fact that she was both alive and that Yaz was going to talk to her. It felt ridiculous, to be so desperate for Yaz’s attention, but Tee wanted more than anything the chance to try and make things right. 

Or at least, as right as they could be, given the circumstances. 

Pressing her lips together, Tee waited for Yaz to speak first, but the brunette was silent as they walked for quite some time. Staying quiet grew harder by the minute, but Tee was determined to give Yaz the space she needed. 

Eventually, they came to a lake. 

Yaz sat down on the rocky shore, staring out over the calm surface. After a moment’s hesitation, Tee joined her, making sure she sat far enough apart from Yaz that they weren’t touching. 

When Yaz finally spoke, it was not the words Tee was expecting to hear. “You told us where the compass is.” 

Tee gave her a sideways glance. “Yes.” 

“I don’t understand why.” There was a hint of frustration in Yaz’s voice, the first bit of emotion she’d shown since the trial began. “That was your best bargaining chip.” 

Clearly, Yaz had been thinking along the same lines Tee had been when she had decided to reveal that information - that they could have killed her, since she had given up the compass’ location.

“You said it yourself - I could have escaped any time I wanted to,” Tee said quietly. “But the truth is, I… I didn’t want to lie to you.” She pressed her lips together. “Not again.” 

Yaz let out a bitter laugh. “And I suppose I should just believe you now?” 

Tee felt a sharp pain in her chest at the hurt in Yaz’s voice. “I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t,” she said finally. “But it doesn’t make it any less true.” 

There was a few minutes of silence before Yaz spoke again, staring straight ahead over the lake. “Was it all a lie?” There was a slight waver to her voice. “Was it all just part of your plan to get us to Arcadia?” 

Tee thought about her time in the camp, how easy it had felt to settle in with everyone. How she had become so used to the routine of it all. How she had come to care so much for them. 

“No,” Tee said softly. “I don’t know when, exactly. But something… something changed along the way. I meant what I said, earlier. I don’t want to hurt any of you.” 

“So what exactly were you planning on doing, then? Once you’d gotten us to Arcadia?” Yaz turned to look at her. “Something tells me Tecteun wouldn’t care much about hurting me or my camp.” 

Tee swallowed hard. Yaz had asked the question that had been plaguing her for quite some time now. She felt like she was being torn in two - the part of her that wanted to protect Yaz, to protect the friends she’d made, and the part that was still desperate to please her mother, to fulfill her mission. 

“I don’t know,” Tee admitted, feeling a wave of shame wash over her. 

Yaz nodded, her jaw clenched. “Right.” 

“You don’t understand, Yaz,” Tee said, and she could hear the desperation starting to creep into her voice. “Tecteun, she - she’s not someone you can just say no to.” 

“I think I understand perfectly, Thirteen ,” Yaz said sharply. “You know, I took you for a lot of things, but never a coward.” 

Tee couldn’t stop herself from flinching. A flicker of regret flashed across Yaz’s face, and she sighed. 

“I’m sorry,” Yaz muttered. “That was uncalled for.” 

Tee gave her a half-shrug. “It’s okay. S’pose you’re not wrong, really.” 

Yaz hesitated for a moment, as if deciding whether or not to speak. Eventually, her curiosity must have won out in the end. “You said she’s only human.” 

Tee looked at her warily. “Yes.” 

“So you’re more powerful than her.” 

Tee stilled. 

“Why do you let her have so much control over you?” Yaz pressed further. Tee could feel her heart racing in her chest, could hear the pounding of it in her ears. “You could help us stop her. We could put an end to all this. We could -” 

“She’s my mother.” The words stopped Yaz in her tracks, her eyes widening as she looked at Tee. “She raised me. She gave me everything. I can’t just…” Tee trailed off, her breath shaky. 

Tee wasn’t sure what conclusions Yaz had drawn, but suddenly the brunette’s face had softened, an almost pitying look in her eyes. “She destroyed the entire world, Tee. She fashioned you into a weapon.” Yaz shook her head. “That doesn’t sound like much of a mother to me.” 

“She has her reasons,” Tee said stubbornly. 

“What reason could there be for all of this?” Yaz asked, gesturing outwardly. “How many lives have been lost, Tee? How many more will die?” She looked at Tee, her eyes filled with grief. “I know you. I know that deep down, no matter what you’ve been taught, you know this is wrong. All this destruction, all of this death… it’s pointless. Doesn’t it hurt you, Tee? Knowing how much has been lost? How much has been taken from you?” 

“ Stop ,” Tee pleaded, feeling bile rise in the back of her throat. “Please.” 

To her surprise, Yaz fell silent, the weight of her gaze still heavy on Tee. 

“I don’t expect you to be ready to fight her with me,” Yaz said after a few moments, her voice quiet and gentle. “But please, Tee. Help me get to the compass. To Arcadia. That’s what your mission is anyway, right?” 

The use of her nickname, the ease with which Yaz had slipped back into using it - it felt like Tee’s heart was being carved from her chest. Was Yaz trying to manipulate her by doing so? Weakening Tee’s defenses, using her to - 

No. 

Just like Yaz knew her, she knew Yaz. And Yaz… Yaz would never use her like that. Not like - 

Tee banished the end of that thought, refusing to think any more about the things Yaz had said regarding Tecteun. 

“Okay,” Tee said quietly, ignoring the way her heart skipped a beat as Yaz’s face grew more hopeful. “I’ll do it. I’ll get you to Arcadia.” 

She just hoped that they would both make it through the journey alive. 

Chapter Text

Yaz had never been so emotionally confused in her life. 

As she and Tee walked silently back from the lake, Yaz’s thoughts wouldn’t stop racing. Trying to subtly take a steadying breath, she decided to use an exercise from her time in therapy, so many years ago. 

Right. Time to take stock of the facts. 

Tee was a Cyber, a part of Division. Fact. 

Tee had lied to her. Fact. 

Tee had saved her life, several times over. Fact. 

Tee cared about her. 

No. If she cared, how could she have betrayed Yaz like she had? How could she work in service of Tecteun?

She’s a victim of that woman just as much as Sonya was. 

Was that a fact? Based on the limited information Tee had told her, Yaz was inclined to believe it. Tecteun seemed to be just as manipulative as she was powerful. How else could she be willing to use someone as kind and gentle as Tee like she was? 

And there it was again, that damned soft spot for the woman. Cyber. Whatever the hell Tee was. 

“She raised me. She gave me everything.” 

She had heard it, in Tee’s voice. The fear, buried underneath the almost rehearsedness of the words. Like it had been drilled into her throughout her entire life. 

The more she thought about it, the more sure she became. Tee, who had never even been to a birthday party before. Had Tecteun ever celebrated her… creation? She’d always thought Tee was just rather socially awkward. To be fair, she was pretty sure Tee would be anyway, but she had a feeling that a lot of it had come from her upbringing.

Had she ever even had a friend before?

Fucking hell, none of this was helping. Yaz still felt as confused as she had been before this stupid exercise. 

She was still angry. Hurt. That much was obvious. 

And yet… a part of her heart ached for Tee. Sympathy? Pity? 

You care for Tee. Fact.

“Yaz?” Tee’s voice was quiet, hesitant, as if she was waiting for Yaz to snap at her over the use of her nickname again. Truth be told, Yaz wished she wanted to. It would make things so much easier if she could just hate Tee. 

“What?” Yaz asked, only slightly tersely. 

There was a moment of silence before Tee spoke again. “I’m sorry.” 

Yaz stopped in her tracks, and she heard Tee still as well. Her breath shaking slightly, she turned to look at the blonde, who was staring back at her with wide, hazel eyes. 

“I’m sorry,” Tee repeated. “For lying to you. For… for everything.” 

Tears sprung to Yaz’s eyes before she could stop them, and she blinked them back forcefully even as her throat tightened. 

What was she supposed to say to that? She wasn’t sure she was ready to forgive Tee. The betrayal was still too raw, too real. 

“I’m still angry.” Well. Those weren’t the words Yaz was intending on, necessarily. 

“I know.” Tee’s response sounded resigned as she stared down at her feet, like she’d already processed and come to terms with the fact, even though there was a hint of sadness that was impossible to ignore. 

So impossible that, without meaning to, Yaz spoke again. “Thank you,” she said quietly, trying to ignore the aching pain in her chest as Tee’s eyes flickered up to meet her own again. 

Tee pressed her lips together into a sad sort of smile, the corners of her mouth barely lifting. 

They kept walking, the air between them just a little less tense as they did. 

When they got back to camp, Yaz could smell the aroma of food coming from the cooking station. 

She walked over, Tee still trailing awkwardly behind her. 

“My finest canned vegetable soup yet,” Bill said as they approached, immediately ladling some into a bowl and handing it to Yaz. She looked at Tee, tilting her head. “You hungry?” 

Tee looked at Yaz, like she was waiting for permission. 

“M’not gonna starve you, if that’s what you’re asking,” Yaz said dryly. “If you’re helping me get to Arcadia, the least I can do is feed you.” 

“Helping you?” Bill asked, raising her eyebrow as she turned back to Yaz. “Don’t you mean us?” 

Yaz pressed her lips together. She’d been hoping to avoid this a bit longer; she had a feeling that her plan wasn’t going to go over well. “No, I mean me. Tee’s going to take me to Arcadia.” 

“So, what, you’re just planning on abandoning the rest of us?” Yaz winced at the hurt in Bill’s voice. “We’d already planned to go find the compass together.” 

“That was before we knew it was a trap,” Yaz argued. “This is way too dangerous. I won’t risk everyone’s lives like that.” 

“You’re acting like it’s your choice to make.” Yaz had never heard Bill speak so sharply to her before, and it stunned her into silence. “This camp has only survived for so long because we’ve stuck together. And I have a feeling that if you ask any one of them, they’ll say the same thing as me. We go together, or not at all.” 

“She’s right.” Yaz’s gaze flickered over towards the sound of Dan’s voice, where he had come around from the back of the station. “All of us have lost people we loved, Yaz. All of us want to see Division destroyed. No matter what it takes.” 

Yaz felt a lump rise in the back of her throat. She knew they were right; she couldn’t force them to stay behind. Even if she could, it wouldn’t be right. 

Still. “I can’t guarantee your safety,” Yaz warned. “You know that.” 

“Yaz, there is no guarantee in this world anymore,” Dan said wryly. “No matter where we are. Even if we stayed here, anything could happen. Those bandits that took the two of you proved it.” 

Yaz breathed in, exhaling heavily. “Okay,” she finally said. “I guess I can’t stop you even if I wanted to.” 

“Damn right,” Bill said, and Dan nodded in agreement. “You’re stuck with me, babes.” 

Yaz couldn’t help the small smile that escaped her. Even if the idea of everyone coming along terrified her, she was glad to still have her friends. 

“Go let everyone else know, please,” Yaz instructed. “We’ll leave tomorrow. If anyone wants to stay behind, they can - and they will be left with plenty of food and supplies to keep them going for a while. I won’t let anyone make this journey unwillingly.” 

“On it, boss.” 

┈┈┈┈․° ☣ °․┈┈┈┈

The entire camp had chosen to go with her to Sheffield - even Adam, apparently, much to Yaz’s surprise. She’d need to have a conversation with him before they left, that much was for sure. Even if she didn’t want to admit she was worried for Tee’s safety, she was concerned about the chance of someone else in the camp getting caught in the crossfire. 

Which is why she’d decided that Tee needed to stay near her, for the time being. This way, too, she would be able to keep an eye on her. 

They were currently in an old makeshift watchtower, the stars above them shining bright as Yaz looked out over the seemingly endless fields. Rory had tried to insist that he take over Yaz’s watch tonight, given how clearly exhausted Yaz was, but Yaz had refused. The compromise had been that Yaz would sit up in the tower and keep watch from there while Dan walked the perimeter. 

Beside her sat Tee, who looked far more alert than she should have been, considering how close she’d come to dying barely twenty-four hours before. Or at least, how close it seemed she’d come. Both Yaz and Tee had gotten a change of clothes and a brief bath before going on watch, and the way Tee looked so absolutely normal sent something of a chill down her spine. She’d seen the wound, seen all the blood rushing from the blonde as she’d carried her limp body to camp. 

And now, nothing. Tee looked just the same as the day they’d first met her, not even a scar in sight.

Well. Maybe not exactly the same. There was something in her eyes; if Yaz had to name it, she would say that Tee looked… haunted. 

“I always wondered how you never seemed to be tired, even with how little you slept.” 

Tee glanced over at Yaz’s statement, seemingly just as surprised by the words as Yaz was. Now that she knew Tee wasn’t human, there were so many more puzzle pieces that seemed to fall into place. How she had managed to escape from Prentis and get Yaz away from the bandits. The odd way in which she sometimes spoke. How little life experience it seemed that she’d had. 

“Do you even need to sleep at all?” Yaz asked when Tee didn’t immediately respond. 

“I do,” Tee said, shifting a bit under the weight of Yaz’s gaze. “Not as much as you all require, though, obviously. But I’m not a… a robot. I still need sleep. Food. Water.” 

“Not a robot,” Yaz repeated, studying Tee intensely. “But not human, either.” 

It didn’t make sense. 

Tee sighed. “I’m not sure what you want me to say to that.” 

To be honest, Yaz wasn’t sure what she wanted Tee to say, either. 

“You said during the trial that you ‘feel things’,” Yaz continued. “What did you mean by that?” 

Tee’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second before she looked away from Yaz. “Nothing.” 

“Nothing?” Yaz scoffed. “So, what, was that another lie? Just trying to get sympathy?” 

“No,” Tee said sharply. She took in a deep breath, exhaling slowly. “No. It wasn’t. I told you, I don’t want to lie to you anymore.” 

“So what did you mean?” 

Tee pressed her lips together, and Yaz waited. “I meant exactly what I said,” Tee finally whispered. “I feel. I feel guilt. Regret. I… care. About the people in the camp. All of… you.” Tee trembled, and Yaz tried not to think about whether the slight weight she’d heard on the you meant anything. 

It couldn’t mean anything. It shouldn’t mean anything. 

Tee was a traitor, and Yaz needed to remember that. And speaking of - 

“How have you been in contact with Tecteun?” 

Tee stilled, turning to look at Yaz warily, clearly confused at the abrupt change in tone. “What makes you think I have been?” 

“A hunch,” Yaz answered with a shrug. “Although with the way you just answered that, I’m a lot more certain.” 

Tee pressed her lips together, her jaw set firmly. 

“So?” Yaz asked. “Phones don’t work anymore, so it clearly isn’t that. And I’ve never seen you with any other sort of communication device.” 

There were a few moments of silence, and Yaz sighed. Just before she was about to give up and move on, Tee spoke. “You first.” 

Yaz’s brows furrowed. “What?” 

“You want more information from me,” Tee said calmly, her expression neutral. “Fine. But I want some in return.” 

For a few seconds, all Yaz could do was simply blink at her. She hadn’t necessarily expected Tee to give her any more information anyway, but she definitely hadn’t expected the blonde to turn the tables on her like that. 

“What sort of information?” Yaz asked cautiously. She wasn’t sure what it was that would be useful for her to tell Tecteun, anyway, given that Tee was soon going to be delivering them right to her doorstep. 

“What’s in Sheffield?” 

Yaz froze. 

“I’m telling you, Najia. It’s real. People are disappearing, and it’s only going to get worse.”

“There’s no such thing as Division, Hakim. Stop being such a conspiracy theorist; you’re going to scare the girls.” 

“Maybe they should be scared. Maybe we all should be. We need to get out of Sheffield.”  

“This is our home. We can’t just leave. Where on earth would we go?” 

Memories started to flood Yaz’s mind. 

“Yasmin.” 

Yaz roused from sleep, bleary-eyed and confused. “Dad?” 

“Pack a bag, beti. We’re leaving.” 

“What?” 

“They’re coming. The city is dangerous. Your mother is getting Sonya ready. We’re going to run.” 

The pounding of Yaz’s heart as her mother handed her the keys. The adrenaline racing through her veins as she and Sonya got into the car, throwing their bags into the boot while their parents gathered a few more supplies. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” Yaz said, trying to keep her voice from shaking.  

“I saw the way you reacted whenever I mentioned it. And I saw the way Graham and Ryan looked at you, too.”  

Her parents had almost made it back to the car. Yaz could still see her mother reaching for the door handle, could still see the look on her face the moment the Cyber grabbed her. 

“Mum!” Yaz screamed. “Dad!”

“Stay inside, Yasmin,” Najia shouted, trying to fight against the Cyber’s grasp. Before Yaz could fully register what was happening, another one had grabbed Hakim and started to drag him away. “Go! Get your sister to safety.” When Yaz hesitated, her mother screamed again. “Go!” 

Tears streaming down her face, Yaz tried to put the key into the ignition, her hands shaking so badly that she nearly dropped them. 

“What are you doing?” Sonya cried out as Yaz started to drive away. “Stop! We have to go back and get them!” 

“We can’t, Sonya,” Yaz said, her throat tight and her heart racing. “Not yet. I have to get you somewhere safe first.” 

“I don’t fucking care about -” 

“I’m not letting them get you, too.” Yaz clenched her jaw, looking in the rearview mirror. The streets were starting to grow more chaotic; it seemed that the invasion was well and truly beginning now. 

She needed to find help. She needed to - 

Making a sharp turn, she started to head towards the only place she could think of to go. 

Grace and Graham would know what to do. They would have come up with a plan to protect Ryan; surely, they could help her and her sister, too. 

When they reached the O’Briens’ front door, they were met with a very tense Grace. 

“Girls,” she breathed, pulling them into a hug. “You’re alright.” After a second, she pulled back, her face growing worried. “Wait. Where are your parents?” 

“They got them,” Yaz choked out. “Please. You have to help us get them back.” 

“Yaz…” 

“Please, Grace,” Sonya begged. “They would do the same for any of you.” 

Grace pressed her lips together, exhaling heavily. “Get inside. We need to make a plan.” 

“Yaz?” Tee’s voice was full of concern. “Are you -”

Suddenly, Yaz couldn’t keep it in any longer. “It’s my home,” she admitted, her voice barely more than a whisper. “It’s where my parents died.” 

“Kevin says that old warehouse is where everyone’s being taken.” 

“How do we know he’s right?”

“We don’t. But we don’t have any other leads, do we?” 

Yaz’s leg wouldn’t stop shaking as she listened to Graham and Grace go back and forth. She felt Ryan’s hand rest on her knee, and she managed to still for at least a few moments. 

“We’ll get them back, Yaz,” he murmured. 

Yaz wasn’t so certain. Her lungs felt heavy with dread; every breath was getting harder to take. 

“You three need to stay here.” 

“No,” Ryan, Yaz, and Sonya said in unison, with varying levels of outrage.

“It’s not safe,” Grace said tersely. “You all need -” 

“They’re my parents,” Yaz said forcefully. “If that warehouse is where they’re at, that’s where I’m going.” 

“They’re our parents.” Sonya’s voice was sharper than Yaz had ever heard it. “You’re not leaving me behind.”

“Sonya’s right,” Ryan said, and Yaz shot him an incredulous look. “We’re safer together.” 

Tee’s voice was soft, quiet. “What happened to them?” 

Yaz scoffed. “What do you think happened to them, Tee?” 

Graham had taken them around some of the back streets, trying to avoid the chaos on the main roads. The area around the warehouse seemed quiet - deserted, almost. 

It was eerie. 

“Think Kevin might have been wrong, Graham,” Ryan muttered as they walked down an alleyway, jumping at the sound of a rat skittering nearby.

“Got any better ideas, son?” Graham asked, and Yaz could practically feel Ryan bristle beside her. Ryan still hadn’t fully warmed up to Graham, even though he and Grace had been married for three years now. 

“We could check the hospital, see if they’ve -” Grace started.

“Mum!” Sonya shouted, taking off running. 

“Sonya!” Yaz shouted, immediately going after her. In the distance, she saw the familiar silhouette of Najia turn around. Her heart leapt into her throat, and a grin broke out over her face as Najia started running towards them as well.

They’d found her. 

“Yaz! Sonya!” She heard Grace shout behind them. “Stop!” 

Why should she? Her mother was there, right there, and she was - 

Running faster than Yaz had ever seen her move before, with no emotion on her face. 

Najia ran under a light, and Yaz saw a glint of silver where warm brown eyes used to reside. 

“Sonya, wait -” 

Yaz grunted as she was hit from the side, crying out when she hit the pavement. She turned her head to see her father, and for a moment relief washed over her. Hakim would protect her. 

And then she saw his eyes. 

Panic gripping her, Yaz twisted her body, trying to crawl away far enough that she could stand and try to run again. Instead, she felt hands - hands that had once held her own so gently when she cried - grab her roughly. 

“Dad, stop, please,” Yaz cried, begging, pleading for some part of him to still be there. She heard the sounds of footsteps pounding on the pavement, Ryan shouting for her to keep fighting back. 

She whirled her head around, catching a glimpse of Sonya in their mother’s grasp. 

This was it. They’d gotten her parents, and now she and Sonya were going to be converted too. 

“Run!” she screamed at Ryan and his grandparents. “Get out of here!” 

Suddenly, there was a loud bang. She felt Hakim’s grip on her loosen, and she ripped away from his grasp. 

“Get down!” commanded an unfamiliar, authoritative voice. Not knowing what else to do, she obeyed. 

The sound of gunfire was deafening. She heard the thud of a body hitting the ground, and her heart dropped into her stomach. 

“Dad?” Yaz trembled, crawling towards him. She turned towards where she’d last seen Sonya, who was now on the ground, staring at their mother’s body in shock. 

“I’m going to need you to back away now, miss,” that voice from earlier said. Yaz looked towards it to see a group of men, clearly in military dress, all armed with guns. 

“I…” Yaz breathed, feeling bile rise in the back of her throat. “They…” 

“Whoever they were, they’re gone now.” The man looked at the bodies, his face grim. “They were already gone.”

“They were converted.” Yaz’s voice was flat, cold. “They were turned into soulless monsters, and they tried to take my sister and I to become Cybers, too. And I had to watch them die by military operatives who never even knew their names.” She looked at Tee, trying to keep her voice from wavering. “Their names were Najia and Hakim. And they died because of Tecteun. Because of Division. I just want you to know that.” 

“Yaz…” 

“Your mother,” Yaz said, and this time she couldn’t keep her voice from cracking. “Took my entire family from me. She took… she took everything.” 

There was a moment of silence before Tee spoke. “I’m sorry.” 

Yaz exhaled a bitter laugh. “Yeah. Me too.” She wiped away the tears that had started to form in her eyes, swallowing down the lump in her throat. “Anyway. There’s your information, I guess.” 

Tee looked at her for a moment as if she wanted to say something else, but instead exhaled heavily and looked back out over the fields. In a way, Yaz was glad. She wasn’t sure she could bear hearing any sympathy from Tee. Not right now. 

After a few minutes of silence, Tee finally spoke again. “Contact.” 

Yaz blinked, trying to mentally shake off the weight of their previous conversation. “What?” 

“You asked me how my - how Tecteun and I communicate. It’s called ‘contact’.” 

Yaz shook her head, confused. “What does that even mean?”

“I don’t know how to explain it, really,” Tee said, her brows furrowing. “She’s in my head. That’s how I hear her voice, and that’s how I talk back to her, so to speak. We call it ‘contact’.” 

“Like… telepathy?” Yaz asked skeptically.

“I guess so,” Tee said with a shrug. “Although it can’t be that, exactly. Tecteun is a strong believer in what she considers ‘real’ science, not magic or psychic phenomena. I’m not sure how it works, only that it does.” 

Yaz gave a small hum of acknowledgment. “When was the last time you… spoke to her?” 

Tee frowned. “It’s been… a while, actually.” 

“Is that odd?” Yaz asked, tilting her head. “Does she usually… ‘contact’ you? Or do you reach out to her?” 

“Both, I suppose,” Tee murmured. “The last time she did was…” Tee’s frown deepened, as if she was trying to piece a puzzle together and struggling. “After we escaped Prentis and the other bandits.” 

“Why don’t you try it? Right now?” Yaz asked, curious to see if she could glean any more information. 

Tee looked at her warily. “I shouldn’t,” she said, pressing her lips together. 

“Why not? It’s not like she’ll know I’m here,” Yaz countered. “Besides, she’d probably like to know that your mission is well on its way, wouldn’t she?” Yaz couldn’t stop the slight bit of bitterness in her voice, and she saw something flash across Tee’s face that looked a little bit like regret. 

Or maybe that’s just what Yaz wanted to see. 

Tee sighed. “Okay.” 

Yaz watched as Tee’s eyes sort of glazed over, not even realising she’d started to hold her breath as she waited for something to happen. 

After a moment, Tee’s eyes returned to their normal hazel, her brows furrowed as she looked back at Yaz. “Nothing.” 

Yaz frowned. “Is that normal?” 

“No,” Tee said, sounding clearly uneasy. “That’s never happened before.” 

“What do you think it means?” 

Tee shrugged, and Yaz watched as her expression shifted into one of casual indifference. “It’s probably nothing. She’s a busy woman.” 

It was a mask that Yaz could see straight through, but something in Tee’s eyes begged Yaz to go along with it. 

“Right,” Yaz said, and Tee’s shoulders practically sagged in relief. “Nothing.” 

They sat in silence for quite a while, Yaz’s mind going a mile a minute. The last forty-eight hours had been filled with too much to even begin processing what all had happened. 

She was so, so tired. 

Without even realising, her eyes had started to close, her head drifting down towards Tee’s shoulder. 

Wait. She had a camp to watch over. She couldn’t trust Tee anymore; she needed to… 

“Get some rest, Yaz,” Tee murmured, and if Yaz had the energy, she would have hated the way her body immediately relaxed, giving in to the exhaustion she felt down to her very bones. 

Yaz closed her eyes, and sleep took her.