Archive of Our Own ^beta

These past few days have been normal. A little bit weird, if anyone wants to point out the heavy weight on someone’s chest. But, it’s not a very big deal at the moment. Not when you have the time of your life enjoying the holiday while waiting for the regular season to start.

It’s been three weeks since Oner opened his League of Legends lobby. Apparently, it’s not a joke anymore that he’s pursuing to be a Kart Rider pro player nowadays. The dopamine that has been filling Oner’s body since he got into the game lasts longer than anyone expected. Including Doran’s expectation who started all of this mess in the first place.

Oh, right, Doran – his beloved boyfriend. The love of Oner’s life. It’s also been a week since Doran had gone home back to Changwon. Oner had another schedule when his boyfriend had to go to Seoul station and ride the KTX back home.

He wasn’t there to drop him off, but the night before, Oner spent his time with the older in his room. Helping him to pack and even said a quick hi to his parents via video call. There was still a looming elephant in the room that Oner has been quite disturbed between the two. It’s not about jealousy or any other thing, they are fine – aren’t they?

“Do you still want me to send you pics every morning?” Doran asked that night after closing his suitcase. Oner, who was munching the Swing Chips, blinked, “What do you mean?” He replied with another question, “Why do you have to ask?” Doran shrugged, holding the urge to roll his eyes in front of his boyfriend, “I don’t know. Maybe because I’m afraid I will ruin your time with Uijin hyung.” Another blink from Oner and its silence filling the room. “Hyung, are you jealous?” Oner managed to ask, while Doran let out the biggest sigh of disappointment that he ever heard through their relationship in these past months, “Really? That was your catch about what I’ve been feeling? You know I’m not the jealous one between the two of us.”

Ouch, that’s personal, Oner thought.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Do you know what it is?”

Oner wanted to answer that no, I don’t know. Because everything has been fine. Even if there were times Oner couldn’t be present in most of the day Doran went through it alone, he would make his time to drop by in his apartment and spent time together. It didn’t have to be long hours, a cuddle is enough for him and he knows it’s enough for Doran too.

Doran sighed again and nudged Oner’s knees. He laid on the right side of the bed, his back facing Oner while burying his face on the pillow. Oner felt like he’s a stranger in the room again. It felt that he’s not being a good boyfriend enough for the older man who had met a lot of people that were more than him in the relationship aspect.

Oner put down the Swing Chips on the nearest table before standing up from the bed. The shift made Doran curl on his side more. Especially when Oner left the room for a few minutes to go to the bathroom. When the door opened again, Oner stood in front of Doran’s bed, waiting for the owner of the room to peek his eyes to spare a glance at him.

“What?” Doran spatted and Oner’s heart sank. He doesn’t know where at fault he is, but he knows one thing about how he feels towards the older; he doesn’t want to lose him again. “Can I lay by your side?” Oner asked, lower lips trembled from nervousness, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it if you ever felt something wrong with our relationship.” There’s another silence filling the void space between them. Doran let out another sigh again before scooting away from the edge of the bed, making space for Oner to lay down, “Come here.”

For the rest of the night, Doran held Oner in his embrace. There wasn't any talking between them until the sun hit the horizon. When the sunlit slowly seeped through the window, the warmth was still there. Creeping inside and outside of Oner’s body from how close he was with the love of his life behind him.

But it only lasted for a few minutes before the alarm rang. Oner had to start his day and Doran was too. It was just a quick kiss on the lips Oner gave before he reached for his jacket. Doran was still laying down, the stare he gave to the younger one was unrecognizable; he was sad, but Oner didn’t know what happened for him to feel that way.

Oner crouched in front of Doran, hesitating to trace his finger on the older’s red flushed cheeks. It felt Doran was so close to tearing up, but he held all of it into himself. The same thing Oner had done for years and he knows Doran didn’t like it. Oner inhaled slowly, waiting for Doran’s consent to let him touch his face before they were going to be separated by distance.

“Can we talk again when you’re back later?” Oner asked, “I want us to work out. I want to talk and resolve everything with you, hyung. I don’t like it when we’re like this.” The big blanket only left Doran’s eyes and nose peeking from underneath it. Then there was a nod, a small one, but it’s an enough answer for Oner. “I love you,” Oner whispered and Doran nodded again, “I love you too, Junnie.”

He scooted closer to kiss Doran’s forehead. Doran closed his eyes, it was better for him to not see Oner leaving his room again when he couldn’t see his boyfriend for the next few days. Being apart from Doran is also a nightmare for Oner, knowing they spent more time together these past months. The fact that Oner finally got his chance after so many years.

The next few days were a living hell for Oner. He was alone for most of it. There were times he contemplated the urge to go back to Gwangju, but Doran insisted telling him not to. In the end, Oner drowns himself with work and games, occasionally jumping into another discord call with Untara.

When Doran came back, he made time to pick him up at the station. It was a battle of wits against Manager Mun, but in the end, Oner won and drove to where the station is. They still didn’t talk about the thing that has been bugging Doran from inside. The usual video calls and sending pictures throughout the day were still there, at the same time the two of them tried to not talk about it before they’re in the same place.

“Hey,” Oner greets, his padding jacket is thick enough to counter the leftover winter cold before Spring comes. Doran holds his chuckle, brushing the tip of his red nose, “Hi there.” It’s natural for Oner to offer his hand, asking if Doran needs any help. It is also a nature for Doran to give his suitcase to Oner’s reach, walking side by side to where the car is parked.

Their destination for tonight is not the dorm. Earlier today, Faker asked for a quick gathering before the usual scrim schedule for them to start by next week. Therefore, to remember the synergy that has been replaced with Chained Together and Kart Rider, Faker suggested doing team bonding. For Oner, this might be the chance to talk about it with Doran.

Beside him, on the passenger seat, Doran was leaning against the window car. Staring at the Seoul city lights while the pop ballad song from Oner’s playlist hums in a medium volume from the digital screen at front. The drive doesn’t take long for them to immediately reach Faker’s mansion. Turning off the engine, Oner helped Doran take a few bags from the trunk, some souvenirs and food that were prepared by his mother to be given to his new teammates.

“She asked about you, by the way,” Doran says after Oner pressed the bell ring of the mansion, “She asked how are we doing.” Oner’s heart feels like floating, like a maple leaf dropping from its stem before hitting the ground below. “What was your answer?” The footsteps echo from the inside, coming closer to where the main door is, “I told her we’re fine.” The sound of someone pressing codes can be heard, but Doran’s voice is louder for Oner’s ears, “That I’m going to stay together for long this time.”

“Hey, you’re back, Hyunjooniedeul.”

“Hello, Sanghyeok hyung. I bring food and souvenirs from home.”

“Ah, I cooked a lot already. Minhyung is also having a party in the kitchen. Come in, come in, be careful Hyeonjun-ah.”

Oner, in fact, almost tripped. No one can’t blame him because he just indirectly got a blessing from his boyfriend’s mother – kind of. He immediately finds his stance and walks past the living room. As Faker said already, Minhyung is indeed having a party in the kitchen.

Their team bonding always consists of eating food. Untara is here too and there's a bunch of sodas on the table already. Some of it is still stored inside the cool drinks fridge belonging to the mansion owner. It’s not like this is the first time for Doran to have a big cuisine night at Faker’s mansion, but all of them know it will end with a bunch of wasted people laying on the ground.

“There will be no alcohol tonight,” Faker states and the boys hold their groans, “But all of you will talk with each other.” Untara agrees, chimes in as he takes another slurp of Faker’s spaghetti, “That’s true! The four of you, love birds, need to talk.” Keria rolled his eyes, “How? You can’t force us to talk. You said it will be a team bonding, let’s have a team talk then.” Faker wipe his hands, helping Gumayusi and Oner who were placing the food Doran’s mother prepared for them, “Oh, I can. Let’s have dinner first and then we'll talk.”

It doesn’t sound like a threat. Faker never threatens someone, not when the team’s stakes are on the plate. It’s an order from their captain and it is for their greater good as a team. Thus, the rest of them follow the King’s order.

The dinner goes smoothly. There is still casual banter between the guys. Untara who occasionally nudged Doran’s arm in between. Telling him that Oner was lonely when he left for Changwon.

It’s also not a secret that there’s a tension between Gumayusi and Keria. Oner notices that for so long. As their best friend, he wants to be the middle person for them. But at the same time, it is better for the two of them to resolve it together; not when he has his own problem with his boyfriend too.

“So, what are we going to do, hyung?” Gumayusi asks after their 2nd round of dinner has ended. All of them are full with food now, Oner was chugging the last drop of sparkling water he has in his hand. Faker has a can of soda under his grip, eyes glancing at the couple in front of him. “It is called 7 minutes in heaven. Where two people will be placed in a room for 7 minutes and figure things out to spend the time together,” he leaned forward, chin touching the top of the can, “The difference in my version of 7 minutes in heaven is there’s no random spinning bottle.”

Oner chokes on his drink, Gumayusi’s mouth drops, Keria frowns, and Doran feels like time stops suddenly.

“Wait, what?” Oner reacts and Faker nods, “Yes. That’s how I’m going to do the team talk tonight.” He fishes off two pairs of room keys on the table, pushing it in front of the pairs. “Choose a room and go in there. Don’t do funny stuff, because me and Uijin will still count the time,” Oner catches Doran turning his head to face Untara, asking for help. While the Teemo lover can only raise both of his hands, “Don’t look at me. All of your problems had him choose this kind of method.”

With that, Doran immediately snatched one of the keys on the table. He stood up from his seat and hurried to take Oner’s arm with him. The jungler almost tripped again while standing up from his seat, turning around slightly, eyes widens in panic as he let Doran drag him away from their team. At the same time, Faker can only chuckle and wave his hand towards the couple.

The key belongs to one of the guest rooms available in this part of Faker’s mansion. Oner slept in one of the rooms once or twice throughout his life as Faker’s teammates. He stands there, staring at Doran who’s trying to open the lock with its key. When it’s finally open, he pushes the door and lets the two of them in.

Oner put down his sparkling water which still left a few inside of it on the bedside table. The bed is not that small, enough for two people laying down on it. He turned around to face Doran who was still standing in front of the door. His eyes glances up to meet Oner’s gaze halfway, there’s uncertainty plasters from it and Oner doesn’t like where is this going to go.

“Hyung,” Oner calls under his breath, “do you want to talk about it now?” Doran is still in silence, gaze flickering under the dim light in the guest room they’re in, “Hyung, I’m all ears. Just tell me what you feel, even if it hurts me.” Doran walks closer and his face is more seen for Oner now. Cheeks flushed red because of the drink earlier, it wasn’t alcohol, but Doran had fun with whatever conversation he had with Keria during the dinner. “I –” the statement hang in the air, throat tightens and that just makes Oner feel more worried, “Slow down, Hyunjoon hyung. Breath with me for a second.”

“I needed you.”

“Huh?”

“I –” Doran stops again, his chest starting heaving up and down at a faster pace, “I needed you in all those days when you were away.” Oner holds Doran’s wrist, traces his finger softly as it circles right above the older’s visible veins. He stays silent and Doran continues, “I know I should’ve told you about how I needed you in those times, but I also know about your work. It’s my fault that I didn’t have to do anything other than doing streams and playing games. You have more things to do out there than me.” Doran shut his eyes for a second, holding his tears as he feel his knees go weak in front of Oner, “But at least, at the very least, can you tell me how you were doing while working? Like, don’t leave me hanging like that. Don’t just leave. What am I to you, Hyeonjun-ah? Your boyfriend? A person you finally got to love all these years? Or am I just an idea for you to finally fall in love with someone?”

Before Oner gets a chance to reply, Doran falls to the floor. It drains him, the energy to finally let out all of the feelings that pent up inside him for all these days. Oner understands that – it’s the most frustrating feeling and, on top of that, he doesn’t want Doran to feel that way. He immediately rushes to lower his body, catching Doran in his embrace and letting him sit on the edge of the bed.

Doran is crying right now. The tears streaming down his face gets Oner’s heart to lurch even more. Dropping to the deepest pit inside his gut. This is the sight he hates the most.

The only time he wants to see Doran cry is when they win together in the future.

“I’m sorry –” Oner shushes him immediately, “Don’t – don’t say that.” Doran rests his head on the crook of Oner’s neck, he’s still crying. His body shakes from how hard he’s crying and Oner pat him on the back slowly, letting the older to unleash everything that has been held. “It’s okay,” Oner reassures him, planting another kiss on top of Doran’s head, “If you ever felt that you’re being selfish, you’re not, hyung. I was, and still am, at fault. Thank you for telling me this. I was just waiting, but it’s my fault too to not ask about it earlier.”

Doran snorts, his face becomes redder than ever. Oner reaches out to the nearest tissue box beside the bed and gives it to Doran immediately. The sound of a louder snort echoes in the room. It breaks Oner heart to pieces seeing Doran like this – and it’s all because of him too.

“I love you,” Doran says, “I don’t want to feel like this. I can just say it without feeling emotional. But I was scared,” Oner hums, letting him add more or his reason, “I thought I lost you for a while.” Oner freezes, his palm stops on Doran’s rib underneath the medium thick material of the cardigan. “You weren’t there when you were supposed to be at home. I was waiting for you to drop by but then you said you’re too tired to come. At first, okay, I understood,” Doran snorted again, holding Oner’s palm on his knees, “But then the stream, multiple times, you weren’t there and I felt really bad that I couldn’t contain myself whenever someone asked me about you. Because I didn’t know too and I’m your boyfriend.” Doran clutches the edge of Oner’s shirt, tears falling from his eyes again, “I hate it when I feel like I don’t know you enough. How can I love you to the fullest when you’re just a fragment of my daily life?”

Oner felt that way years ago. For him, loving Doran was just a fairytale. Impossible, if he want to use Keria’s word. It was impossible because he didn’t make any move; he was just there, staring from the opposite of the rift whenever Doran had to hug his jungler and teammates in front of him.

Doran was just a fragment of an idea to fall in love with someone out of his reach. It would never work, they won’t ever meet in between. There were times when Oner felt like he could make it, but Doran was just more than him. He’s a star shining in the midst of the chaos galaxy up above and Oner was his watcher.

“I wasn’t,” Oner replied, “I am not one of your daily life’s fragments. I’m here and I’m yours truly, hyung.” He cradles Doran’s face, cupping his chin for their eyes to meet in between. Brushing his thumb softly on Doran’s cheeks as he wipes the tears stain on it, “I love you too, I’ve always loved you. I know I’m suck at this kind of thing, but I’m trying. I’ll prove it to you, I should’ve from long ago. I hope it’s not too late.” Doran shakes his head frantically, reaching out to hold on Oner’s palm on his cheek, “No, no. You’re never too late. It’s better to realize it now than never at all.”

Oner chuckles, a tear falls on his cheek. He can’t hold it in anymore. The fact there was a slightest thought in Doran’s mind that he lost him for a while it’s enough reason for him to cry. To realize that he was so fucking stupid all this time. Doran erases the gap between them to kiss the tears away on Oner’s cheek.

“You’re here now, Junnie.”

“I should’ve been here since days ago.”

“But you’re here now, am I right?”

Oner wants to cry more, but the sound of Doran’s light laugh cures it instantly. It’s insane that the mere presence from the older is enough reason for him to continue to live. To thrive more for both of them; for their relationship. Doran is not the only one thinking that he will stay in this relationship for long.

Until death do them apart.

“How much time do we have left?” Doran suddenly asks. Both of their foreheads are now resting on each other. Oner shrugs, “Do you really think they count the time? Uijin hyung invited Jaewan and Junsik hyung. They were probably having another party in the basement.” Doran grins, scooting closer to his boyfriend’s warmth, “Then, can you kiss me now?” Oner holds his breath, he’s been waiting for this, “You don’t have to ask.”

Oner always thinks of Doran being something fragile if he isn't being taken care of well enough. He’s afraid that he will be the one who’s going to break him. But none of that is true. Doran is strong, stronger than Oner ever is.

Instead of showing how strong they are in front of each other, Doran hates it when Oner has to pretend if he’s fine; when he’s not. It’s not a sin to be fragile together. It is not a bad thing to cry. Picking up the pieces together and attaching them while staying side by side.

Oner kisses Doran like the world outside is willingly waiting for them. They have the time for themselves, anything else can be put aside at the moment. Having Doran back to embrace is more important than anything that can possibly be given by the universe to him. Doran, himself, it’s the best thing that ever happened in Oner’s life.

“Hyunjoon hyung,” Oner sighs and Doran deepens the kiss. It’s natural for him to take his place on Oner’s lap immediately, body flushes against the broader one. “Hyung –” the sigh immediately changes into a moan, not when Doran starts grinding down, “I miss you so much,” the older whispers between the kiss, a desperate attempt. Oner’s self-control crumbles each second, the grind against his shaft down there is not helping at all.

“Hyung.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m not going to hold back,” Oner pulls himself to look at Doran in the eyes, “We didn’t bring anything.” Doran looked at him with an unamused gaze, “What? I’m being respectful to you who just came home! What happens later if you regret doing it now in Sanghyeok hyung’s guest room? You’ll be sulking and we end up not going to have sex after we reach home later.” Oner has his defense, he’s just trying to buy some time so all of this doesn’t feel rushed or, worse, forced. Doran wraps his arms around Oner’s neck, another grind he gives and Oner can’t help but gasp at the action, “Who said anything about taking off our clothes?”

Throughout their relationship, they’ve been trying to spice up what they’re trying to do in bed. Not quite to the extreme scene, Doran doesn’t like it. But at least, he tried it with Oner. They are both clueless and stupid at the same time, but it’s not embarrassing to do it with the love of your life.

For them, doing it while still having their clothes on is common. They did it often, especially during the tournaments. Thanking the God up there for securing everytime they had to sneak into the toilet in LoL park before the match began. It was harder after the match ended because Oner had to be dragged for several interviews, leaving Doran slumping on the sofa, waiting to kiss the hell out of his boyfriend.

Thus, Oner trails his palm around Doran’s waist. Tugging the waistband playfully, triggers some giggles coming from the older’s mouth. They kiss again, sloppily this time. Taking the whole world in between the two lips of people who have loved each other longer than they realized.

“You’re so –” Oner pull himself to stare at Doran again, “fucking pretty.” Doran whimpers pathetically, gasping the same time as Oner slowly thrust forward against him. Writhing on his lap is one of Doran’s wishful thinking whenever they’re apart from each other. “Do you really think you can last long like this, hyung?” Doran whines, both of his legs wrap around Oner’s waist so perfectly, “I asked you a question, hyung.”

“I can – I can, I can.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh,” tears brimming in Doran’s eyes and Oner knows it’s not a sad one, “Because I’m a good boy.” That sentence alone gets Oner’s palm still around Doran’s waist. It’s like the older knows how to switch his brain off in the middle of their heated make out session. Doran moves closer, breath shudders against Oner’s cheek as the tip of his nose brushes against his ear, “I’m good for you, Hyeonjun-ah. Always have been.”

It doesn’t take long for Oner to flip him off on the bed. Having Doran on his lap is the best thing ever, but hovering him to assert dominance against him is another thing. What’s crazier than this is Doran loves it. Judging how he chuckles under Oner, tugging the younger closer to kiss him on the lips.

Oner’s kisses trails down to Doran’s neck. His hands are sneaking underneath the thin tee that has been attached to Doran’s skin for hours now. It has been a long time for him too since he has Doran’s skin underneath his touch. The electricity can’t be ignored, but there’s no reason for him to stop either.

Doran buckles his waist, seeking for more friction down there. Oner has to pin his waist down on the bed, unleashing a bigger force that gets him to whine.

“Calm down,” Oner’s voice is laced with daze and lust already, dropping a few tones lower that makes Doran’s head dizzier each second, “I’m not going to let you cum if you don’t behave.” Doran is tearing up, mouth slightly part open as his chest heaving up and down. A 100% different kind of sight on what happened earlier when they first stepped into the room. Oner curls a small smile on his lips before nuzzling their noses together, “Let me worship you for a moment, hyung. Let me make you feel good, okay? I miss you too,” he left a quick peck on Doran’s lips, letting it linger there more than it should be, “I miss you so much, I can’t even breathe when you’re not by my side.”

It might sound too dramatic for other people’s perspective, but never from Doran. To be put it exactly, the feeling’s mutual.

Doran sighs again when he feels Oner’s kisses touch his exposed chest. Pushing the thin tee until it pools around the upper body, enough for him to leave more kisses on his chest and stomach. Doran’s fingers run through the black strands. His body arches as Oner bites his skin, letting several red marks bloom there, hiding underneath any clothes Doran will wear in the next few days.

The teasing tug around the waistband gets Doran to groan. Squirming under his touch as he tries to squeeze the nearest bedsheet he can reach. Oner chuckles in a low voice, tugging the waistband again but not with his hand. Instead of using that, he uses his teeth.

It’s a visible sight for him even under the dim light of the room. Doran is rocking hard under the loose thick pants he’s wearing right now. Oner brings his palm to brush the bulge from the outside. Giving it a little squeeze and that’s enough to give Doran a sharp inhale.

“Ah –!” Doran arches his waist, leaning against the friction Oner was currently giving him, “Fuck – fuck, Junnie.” Oner can only chuckles airily. The position he's in right now is the filthiest wet dream he ever had about Doran; him, between his toplaner’s thighs while brushing his cheek against Doran’s cock? The best dream indeed. “Did you cum when I didn’t give you any permission?” The wet patch is visible for him to witness, even when the pants color is lean more to the deepest shade of blue, “Hyung, did you just disobey me?”

“No – no, I –”

“Oh, you’re lying right now?”

“I’m sorry!” Doran squeaks, cheeks bloom red and his lower lips are chapped from the earlier kiss, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I couldn’t hold on, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Oner giggles – he fucking does, even when Doran is having a trouble breathing with the sheer amount of pleasure running through his veins at the moment. “You’re so cute,” Oner crawled back to hover around Doran’s body, “I might knock you up if I have to.” The still moment is heavy, it’s ringing inside both of their heads, Doran whines, “Please – please, please,” Oner breath on top of the love of his life’s lips, parting his mouth slightly as he listens the latter pray for him, “Please, knock me up.”

They talked about it before. It was just one of those kink discussions they had before the moonlight seeped through the window. Doran agreed, they did it more than once before. Even when Oner was once embarrassed after they did it, Doran was fine, he liked it too;  better, he loved it.

Thus, whenever Oner tries to bring it up on the plate, Doran will always take it. They are hungry after all. Touch deprived, longing for something that they can get if there was more communication between the two. But, as Doran said, it’s better they realized it now than never in the future.

Oner tilted his head to drag his tongue around Doran’s jaw. Rolling his eyes to the back, Doran finds his fingers tugging Oner’s hair. Spreading his legs wider to give more space for the younger. Their bodies flushed against each other, trying to find the perfect rhythm.

The temperature rises per digit each second pass. Doran gasps when Oner starts thrusting, slotting his clothed cock down there between his asscheeks underneath the pants material. The friction is insane, Doran might combust at any time now. But the pressure of Oner’s palm pinning his waist down on the bed sends him to the front yard of heaven up there.

“Oh, God,” Doran moans, raising his hip higher for Oner’s thrusts slipping underneath it just right, “Ah – fuck, fuck. That feels good.” Oner sighs, wrapping his free left arm to grab the older’s waist in a one smooth swift. Raising his body to thrust deeper. Doran screams, loud enough for Oner to hear, and his nails dig deeper on his shoulders, “Hyeonjun –!”

“Hyung –”

“Junnie, Junnie, Junnie –”

“God, you’re so fucking hot,” Oner breathe against Doran’s ears. The toplaner tilt his head backwards on the bed sheets. Sweats pooling on his forehead, red marks blooming on the crook of his neck under the lamp light. Oner exhales sharply in disbelief, he can’t believe this is his life right now, “Gonna put babies in you, baby,” Doran’s gaze filled with lust, hazy and cloudy enough for him to feel stupid even more with how Oner’s thrusts become faster against his hole down there, “Ah – ah, babies, babies,” Doran chants helplessly, whimpering as he reach out to touch Oner’s face, “Breed me – fuck.” 

It doesn’t take long for them to reach their climax. They don’t care if they’re still covered with clothes. The friction is insane and none of them are in the right state of mind. Clouded with lust and hazy temperature slowly envelope in the room.

Oner comes with a groan, burying his nose on the crook of Doran’s neck. Doran feels his body tremble, following Oner’s release as his second climax for tonight. His fingertips still dance around the short hair belonging to his boyfriend. Scratching his nape, leaving possessive marks that still can be visible to see for anyone in the next few days.

They stay in the position for more than they should. It’s gross, Oner believes, and he expects Doran to push him off. But instead of doing that, Doran held him close. The hug tightens and there’s only softness filled with affection that Oner has crave these past days.

“Thank you,” Doran says suddenly, “Thank you for staying here with me.” Another silence fills in the air. It’s not as heavy as before. Oner turns his head, still sniffing as much as the leftover Strawberry cologne around Doran’s neck, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t say that again.”

“Why? I want you to know –”

“You just fucked me while still wearing clothes. You’ve done enough for my mood, okay?” It's difficult when they’re in some kind of situation like this. Because Oner doesn’t know if Doran is being sarcastic or genuine. Doran sighs, palm reaching out to rub his temple, “Now, we need to clean up.” Oner groans, “See? This is what I told you that you will regret after we did something like – mmmh.”

Doran erased the gap between their lips again. Holding Oner close to his embrace, shutting him up from another sulky mumbling. Doran rests his palm comfortably on Oner’s cheek. Tracing his finger to draw a circle on it before Oner stops him, lacing their fingers together as their lips move in the same motion against each other.

Oner breaks the kiss first, letting the string of saliva still attach on their lips. He thinks of it as another red string of faith, connecting the two of them throughout the years. It took him years for this moment to happen. Even when there were several times Oner needed to give up on Doran occasionally, his fate was not meant to be with him.

But, fuck that, honestly.

“I love you,” Oner whispers under his breath. As if it will be the same thing he’d say before his last breath to Doran in any lifetime. “I love you so much, hyung,” he adds again, firmer this time. Doran fights a grin curling on his lips, wiping the tear stain on his face before nodding, “I love you too. I don’t want to lose you ever again. Don’t leave me again, Hyeonjun.”

“I won’t.”

“Promise?”

“Can I show it through my actions?” Doran raises an eyebrow, “No, it’s not like I don’t want to promise. It’s just, I’m bad with words. I want to tell you through my actions.” Oner feel his breathing pace gets faster again, the room temperature rises and it’s not because of how they are in bed right now. “Sssh, hey, look at me,” Doran lift Oner’s chin for their eyes to meet halfway, “Breathe with me, baby.” Oner inhales and exhales, following Doran’s instruction, “It’s okay, I know you, my love. We’re going to be fine, our relationship is not bound by mere promises,” he rests his forehead against the younger one, “Our relationship is ours to take and it will be fine. As long as we’re together.”

Doran gasps when Oner hugs him tight. Nuzzling his head on Doran’s shoulder, there’s a sound of sniffling followed after. Oner is crying and it’s fine. It’s better like this rather than Doran having to watch him suffer in silence ever again.

They both stay in the same position for another few minutes. Oner had to make sure he didn’t look like a person who just cried earlier while Doran didn’t even bother to tell him. He still looked handsome, better when the weight on his shoulders got lifted. Oner still looks like the person that once Doran dreamed a few years ago.

Stepping out from the guest room, Oner takes out his phone from his pocket. Scrolling the notification that has been left by several people, including Faker himself.

sanghyeokie hyung: after both of you’re done, just go home

sanghyeokie hyung: also you’re welcome

sanghyeokie hyung: the regular season will start soon. the team needs both of you, okay?

sanghyeokie hyung: lets talk again tomorrow at the office

“Hyeonjun,” Oner lifted up his head, “We really need to clean up first. It’s fucking gross. I don’t want to sit in the car in this state.” Oner facepalm and Doran winces in guilt, “You can fuck me again after this. Just, please, get my bag in the car. There are clean clothes I brought from my home.” The younger nods in the end, but before he gets back to the car, Doran tugs his hand to leave a quick kiss on the cheek. “I love you,” he whispers, giggles afterwards while witnessing the blush on Oner’s cheek, “Let’s make babies after this.”

“Oh my God.”

“You like it!”

“Yeah, I do,” Oner kissed Doran’s lips, “I love you too, princess.”