Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Regulus’s POV-

It was a morning like any other, Regulus awoke in his bed, he checked the time. 5:30 am. Perfect, he would be early. He walked through the common room, walking into the boy’s bathroom. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, pulling off his robes, so he was in a white t-shirt now, his gaze dropped to his forearm. The dark mark. Regulus remembered his mother’s mad yelling, like she was in a trance, like that christmas, the last one with- Regulus clenched his fists cursing. He promised himself he would think about him, or Loony Lupin, as Crouch called him, though Regulus found it slightly childish. Or freaking Peter Pettigrew, or- Or James Potter. God Regulus hated James, stupid brother stealing Potter.
He wanted to grab him by the robes and beat that boy senseless, yell at him for stealing his brother, for Sirius’s abandonment, for letting Regulus get tangled up in this! He inhaled sharply, Boys don’t cry!, his mother’s shrill voice echoes in his head, he pulled on his Quidditch robes and composed himself. He had learned a lot after his broth- Sirius, left. How to hide his emotion, how to act like he was above everyone, when really he wanted to curl up and hide.

“Oi! Black! Get your bloody arse out here! Some of us need to use the bathrooms!” Shouted some voice from the common room, he was too tired to register who it was. He left and made his way to the quidditch fields. He walked to the field, his black shoes crunching on the gravel, polished broom in hand, Mother had wanted him to drop quidditch, but he’d convinced her it was good for him. Somehow. He got to the field to see freaking James Potter, doing laps on his broom, his brother timing him. Anger flared inside him, he stormed over. Sirius had left after James gave him a look.

“Oi! What the bloody hell are you doing here? It’s Slytherin practice today” Regulus said, keeping his voice high and mighty, James looked utterly confused.
“What are you on about? It’s Gryffendor today?” James protested, pulling out his schedule, which did say Gryffindor today. Regulus pulled out his, which very clearly said Slytherin. “God damn it! It’s double booked, innit?” James said, running a hand through his messy hair. Regulus glared.
“How do I know this isn’t one of your pranks Potter? Regulus spat angrily, glaring.
“Reggie-” James started.
“Don’t call me that!” Regulus sapped.
“I swear I didn’t do this, let’s wait until both our teams arrive, then we can sort this out.” There it was, James Potter being stupidly level headed, stupid brother stealing bastard-. James had gone back to his laps, and Regulus started up, distancing himself from the boy. He kept looking at Potter, who did loopty-loops in the world.
Regulus wondered if he’s ever had to hide from his mum, obey out of fear, he doubted it. Why did people like Potter get to have a perfect life!?! Regulus wanted to beat James senseless, demanding for his brother back. He didn’t want this new Sirius, he wanted his brother back. He wanted to turn back time, when all he and Sirius had to worry about was Kreacher catching them sneaking extra chocolates from the kitchens, or how to avoid chores. As his anger bubbled he sped faster and faster around the track, eyes burning with tears. BOYS DON’T CRY REGULUS BLACK, his mother’s screeching voice echoed in his head. His knuckles were tight around his broom.
He almost didn’t notice Marcus screaming for him to get his bloody butt down here. He landed with grace, the field had been divided into two parts. The Gryffendors were bristling, James, their captain, was trying for peace, idiot, Regulus thought. Complete idiot, he wondered if being an idiot ran in the Potter family, he was suddenly glad James didn’t have siblings. Madame Hooch blew her whistle to shut everyone up, Regulus did his best not to flinch at the noise.
“As you can all tell!” Her voice was loud and commanding, but not in a rude way, like his father’s shouting was, more in a brave tone, that made Regulus feel like she had everything in order. “There has been a minor scheduling issue- not now Marcus!” She snapped as Marcus started to speak. “I am very well aware about the upcoming cup! And that you all cannot miss any practice. Therefore, I have made the executive decision…” She paused slightly for dramatic affect, only for half a second, but Regulus rolled his eyes. “For you lot to practice together!” She went on rambling about how with the war, Hogwarts needed to come together to stay strong, like a team building exercise, no one seemed happy, even Hooch seemed like she was trying to convince herself it would work. James started to protest but Hooch cut him off.
“Any disagreements will have you in detention all week, any practicing you plan to do, you’ll do detention instead.” She said firmly, which shut everyone up. She snapped her fingers and two cups of ice lolly sticks materialized in her hands. “Everyone will pick a stick, whoever has the same colour will be your partner. Gryffindor picks from the right mug, Slytherin picks from the left, and absolutely NO TRADING! Or you will get detention!” She said, and was then flooded by begrudgingly agreeing students, mumbling about how it was unfair. Hooch didn't seem to care, if she even heard. Regulus picked his stick from the black coffee mug. There was an unmistakable vibrant orange on the end, he sighed, it would be tolerable as long as he didn’t get put with-
“ Anyone have bright orange!!!??” James’s voice rang out, and Regulus’s face paled, oh the irony. He was going to say nothing, maybe Hooch would think she screwed up the spell, and make everyone redraw.
“I believe Mr. Black drew the orange stick,” Hooch said with a smile, his fists clenched. Potter didn’t seem excited by the idea much either, but he walked over, heaving a sigh.
“Oh the irony” Potter huffed, he smelled of cigars, Regulus cocked an eyebrow and wrinkled his nose, a filthy habit. Potter laughed, a bit self conscious, “I don’t smoke! The smell is credited to your brother and his idiot boyfriend” Regulus stopped dead in his tracks.
“His what?” He asked, his voice not containing any emotions at all, making James wince.
“You didn’t know?” Potter asked, he was doing that stupid pitying thing again, making his face look very punchable. His brother, dating a guy. His mother had made it very clear that people like that weren’t allowed in his house, Regulus then remembered Sirius wasn’t allowed in the house. His mother had called them nasty, and filthy, and unmanly, Regulus clenched his fists. Of course his brother would do that,dating Remus Lupin,a mudblood boy,would surely give their mum a heart attack. His head spiralled, there was a strange tug in his gut, he just shook his head briskly. It’s not like Regulus really cared that Sirius was gay or whatever, it just seemed like more of a spite thing, which pissed him off. He couldn’t really be homophobic with Barty and Evan kissing every thirty seconds.
“I was not aware” He said and James and him went to the drills. He was very disappointed to realize that James Potter was not annoying, in fact he was funny. What kind of cruel twist of fate brought him here. He did his best to be annoying, arrogant, and stuck up, he hoped James would yell at him, shove him, do something other than just smile sadly at him. He reminded Regulus of Dumbledore, the absolute rat. His faked pitying smile I’m afraid I cannot help you with family matters. He had said the night Regulus had come to him, the start of the year. He hated the headmaster with a burning passion after that.
Regulus sighed, racing James on his broom, the other boy was laughing, doing loops and what not, Regulus thought it was very immature. And maybe it was the spiralling about his brother’s current relationship, and the war, and James Potter, being very distracting, but he wasn’t paying much attention, and was promptly hit with a bludger, falling off his broom, and spiralling down.

Chapter Text

JAMES-
He saw the bludger spiralling towards Regulus, but he didn’t call out. He thought Reg would dodge it, or it would just brush past him, he had forgotten how light the guy was. Which is why it was entirely James’s fault when Regulus cried out, falling off his broom. This moment would stick with James forever, because he hesitated. He didn't rush after Regulus. He thought, good let him fall, let him hurt. James looked at the falling boy,his face was laced with pure terror. His eyes were wide, and James snapped out of it. He dove after Reg, reaching for him, but he hit the ground, there was an unmistakable crunch, broken bones, and Regulus cried out in pain. The entire field rushed over.
“EVERYONE STEP AWAY FROM THE BOY!” Madame Hooch screamed. James looked at Regulus, he didn't step back, he just stood there. Reg’s face was contorted in pain, his leg was bent in all funky ways, it made James queasy, he always got queasy with this stuff. Reg was trying not to cry, that was clear. James was vaguely aware of Madame Hooch yelling at him.
“Potter! POTTER! Well, it seems you’ve just volunteered to take Regulus to the hospital wing then” She said, James nodded, snapping out of it.
“Ah- yeah okay, I’ll uh, do that.” James crouched next to Regulus, he was barely conscious. James scooped up Reg, he had a feeling that if Regulus was conscious he’d be hexed to death now, but he felt Reg’s body go limp. James wanted to puke, he hated injuries, and god the way Reg’s broken leg was moving, he gagged. James had a feeling he was as green as Regulus’s slytherin tie. They got to the infirmary, James set Reg down with Madam Pomfrey, and then promptly excused himself to the bathroom, leaning over the toilet and puking. After about five minutes of nonstop hurling, James felt a bit better. He groaned slightly, lying on the cold floor, the bathroom reeked of James’s throw up and other bathroom-ly things.
“Oh god” James groaned, stumbling to the sinks, splashing water in his face. He fixed his glasses, James’s hair was messed up and wet, it made him smile slightly. At least it looked good. His caramel skin was pale, having just been sick. James inhaled and exhaled a few times, then fixed his robes. He walked out of the bathroom, he heard Madam Pomfrey fussing over Reg, by the sounds of it, he had fractured his leg and spine, James winced, magic could only do so much. Madam Pomfrey could probably fix his spine, but Reg’s leg would be iffy for a while. A hot white ball of guilt settled in his stomach, making the back of his neck feel warm. James swallowed his guilt, and walked over.
“Oh Mr. Potter! Nice of you to join us!” Madam Pomfrey said with a slight smile. James and Madam Pomfrey were well acquainted, with Remus’s whole furry problem and all.
“Is-” James’s voice was thick and wet, he was nervous. “Is Reg ok?” He asked, fiddling with his snitch in his robe pocket. It was a nervous habit, better than nail biting though in his opinion.
“Mr. Black will be alright, although you will have to escort him to his dorms.” Pomfrey said as she walked over to her desk. “I was just about to notify his parents,” She said. James’s blood ran cold, even if Reg was loyal to his parents, they were horrible. James didn’t want Reg or Sirius to have to see them.
“Is- is that really necessary?” James asked cautiously, trying not to wince as he cut himself on the wings of the snitch. It happened a lot actually, James didn’t really mind. The pain kept him focused, down to earth, usually snapping him out of the anxiety. It’s not like James did it on purpose, and the cuts were minor, like paper cuts. But he didn’t do it on purpose. He didn’t. He hoped he wasn’t just telling himself that.
“Mr. Black just suffered a pretty severe injury, Mr. Potter” Madam Pomfrey said, almost shocked. Almost.
“You know what Reg’s parents are like!” James shot back, he didn’t know why he suddenly felt so protective of Reg, who had been nothing but pissy to him since they met. Madam Pomfrey pursed her lips and sighed, looking down.
“You really think this is what’s best for Mr. Black?” She asked and James nodded his head.
“Yes. Yes definitely.” James said, no doubt of uncertainty in his tone. Madame Pomfrey just nodded.
“If you think that this is the best for the boy, go ahead.” Madame Pomfrey said with a sigh. James grinned and nodded, thanking her. He then walked over to Reg, sitting by him. Regulus looked so much younger than he did when he was awake. The creases in Reg’s brow were gone, he looked so peaceful. James felt a strange urge to cast a shielding spell, so that no one would ever hurt Reggie again. Reg’s eyes opened slightly, he was still on whatever painkillers Pomfrey had given him.
“S’that James?” Reg asked, James chuckled slightly at his slurred words.
“It’s me,” James said, a slight smile on his face. Regulus winced slightly and James tried to ignore the crushing guilt eating at him.
“Tha’s cool” Reggie said, James could barely hear him, so he just nodded.
“Do you want to go back to your dorms?” James asked softly, he noticed the crease in Regulus’s brow, as if the usual weight of responsibility had set it, or the medicine was wearing off, maybe both. Regulus stayed silent for a moment, and James slowly realized that he was asleep. He chuckled softly, everything seemed peaceful and as it should be. An undisturbed silence. At least it was before Sirius came barreling in, wearing Remus’s white t-shirt and pajama pants, he didn’t even have shoes on.
His hair was still wet and he was pale. Sirius and Reg both had pretty naturally pale faces, Sirius had joked that the reason behind that was because their house was so dark. James knew he had meant it as a joke, but it always just worried him more. But currently Sirius was snow white, James hadn’t seen him like this since The Prank. James always tried not to think of The Prank, he worried that if he did, Sirius and Remus would fight about it again.
Sirius met James’s eyes, his friend’s eyes were red and he had clearly been crying. James got up and walked over, helping Sirius to a seat next to Reg.
“Is- he’s ok yeah?” Sirius asked after staring at Reg for a good minute or two.
James nodded “Madame Pomfrey said he was okay, his foot might be a bit iffy for a month or so. She’s having me walk him back to his dorm after the medicine wears off,” James chuckled softly, “He’s a little loopy right now actually.” he said, cutting himself accidentally again on the snitch. Sirius visibly relaxed for a minute, exhaling, then he paled again and shot up, stammering.
“Walburga- Orion- they- are they-” Sirius started, but James put his hand on Sirius’s knee.
“No, Madame Pomfrey decided it wasn’t worth having them come down here” James said gently, which wasn’t a full on lie. Sirius relaxed back in his seat. It was silent for about five minutes, or as silent as it could be. The Hogwarts halls were never quiet, there was always a ghost on a tangent, the staircases moving, a sink dripping, something breaking, someone screaming, etc. But James had learned how to tune all that out his first year. It had been a bit of an issue actually. He dozed off, the anxiety and effort of carrying Reg earlier finally catching up to him.

Chapter Text

SIRIUS- TW- family abuse and angst :P (An hour earlier)

They were sitting in the common room, Sirius had been teasing Remus as he heard a shout from the quidditch field, Reg’s scream. He knew that scream from anywhere. Sirius felt his blood run cold as he jumped over the couch and to the window. He was almost oblivious to Remus’s stream of curses that he had let out when Sirius had stepped on his foot or something. Sirius turned his gaze to the quidditch field. He saw the crumpled body of his brother; he didn't even blink. His hands gripped the windowsill and he just stood there, staring. Remus walked up next to him.
“S’that Reggie?” He asked softly, Sirius nodded slowly. Remus sighed and rubbed his thumb on Sirius’s hand. “Your hands are cold” He commented and Sirius seemed to snap out of his daze.
“I need to go- make sure he’s okay- or something!” Sirius said, his breath coming in short increments.
“Siri, you’re in your boxers” Remus said. Sirius didn’t say anything, he just ran upstairs, grabbing a white t-shirt that smelled strongly of Remus, and his flannel pajama pants. He dashed out the door, running until his lungs hurt. He hadn’t realized when the rain had started, all he knew was that his black hair clung to his face. His eyes were wet but he couldn’t tell if it was because of the rain or he had started crying.
When Sirius made it to the quidditch field, it was almost empty, except for Marlene, who was sitting on the bench. When she heard him stumble onto the field, she looked up from her book. When Marlene saw him, Sirius could imagine she thought she was hallucinating.
“Where- Where’s Reg?” Sirius panted, feeling his chest tighten. Marlene smiled softly.
“He’s in the infirmary with James” Marlene said something else, but Sirius didn’t hear her, he dug his bare feet into the grass and ran. He got to the infirmary and pushed open the doors. His eyes met James’s, and his friend motioned for Sirius to sit next to him.
He stared at Reg for a minute or two. Sirius clenched his fists, mind flashing back to his years in the Black house.
James explained how Reggie was okay, just loopy. A thought cut through Sirius’s mind, so sharp, like a dagger. He turned to his friend in a panic. His parents, his parents would take Reg away, they would hurt Reg, hurt Sirius.
“Walburga- Orion- they- are they-” Sirius started, feeling the colour drain from his face. He then felt his mate’s hand on his knee, a reassuring gesture that Sirius had always appreciated.
James gave him a reassuring smile. “No, Madame Pomfrey decided it wasn’t worth having them come down here”
Sirius relaxed into his chair and turned to James, “hey Jamie?” He started. James was doing his blank stare thing he did when tuning out all of the noises. Sirius tried not to be hurt, knowing that James probably wasn’t tuning him out, didn’t help him feel any less lonely as he watched his unconscious brother lie there in a hospital bed.

Chapter Text

Regulus woke up with a dull headache, the taste of potions in the back of his throat. The lights were too bright. He turned his head over, vision still blurry, there was someone sitting next to him. He tried to take guesses until his vision cleared, it could be a family member, though Regulus doubted they would wear such casual clothing. It could be Sirius, though this guy didn’t have the slouchy posture of his brother. The person’s posture also ruled out Barty, and Evan was blonde and pale. His vision cleared slightly.

Potter. Regulus looked at his arm anxiously, good he was still in his robes. Potter smiled awkwardly, waving his hand. Regulus narrowed his eyes, why was he here?
“Hey Reggie” Potter smiled awkwardly.
“Shut it Potter, why are you here?” Regulus grumbled, sitting up.
“You know you love me,” Potter chuckled, running a hand through his hair. Regulus got out of bed, the lights went dark. He was in Potter’s arms, he shoved him away, standing up. Regulus swayed, but didn’t black out again which he considered a win.
“I’m fine.” Regulus snapped.
“You sure- nevermind, Madame Pomfrey told me to walk you to your dorms, so that’s what I’m gonna do” Potter grinned nervously as if Regulus would hex him on the spot. Honestly he didn’t have the energy to protest. He got up and glared at the older boy.
“Fine, but don’t make it weird.” Regulus grumbled, walking past Potter, who was surprisingly flustered.
“Wha- I- Why would it- Reggie get your arse back here!” James stuttered, chasing Regulus down the halls. Regulus broke into a sprint, his face breaking into the slightest grin, which hurt his face muscles.
They made it to the Slytherin dorms, both boys were slightly out of breath, Potter was laughing. Regulus hated to admit it, but he didn’t hate the sound of the other boy’s laugh all that much. Regulus tightened his hand into a fist, certainly Madame Pomfrey’s potions were still in effect, making him think odd thoughts.
Regulus stiffened, standing up and dusting off his robes. “Good day James” he muttered and opened the door to the dorms. James looked dumbfounded, Regulus raised an eyebrow. “Something wrong?”
“N- no, just never heard you call me James before,” James- Potter chuckled.
“Well, it won’t happen again.” Regulus snapped, shutting the door. Now all he had to do was get to his dorm and-

“REGGIE FUCKING BLACK WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN” A worried voice echoed the hallway, Pandora Rosier. Regulus cracked a smile as he was engulfed in Pandora’s arms, she smelled like vanilla. Regulus wondered if all girls had their own scent, the only girls he hung around were Pandora and Dorcas. He then thought of Potter’s scent. Regulus promptly imagined whipping out his wand and setting that thought on fire.
As if on cue, Barty, Evan, and Dorcas ran down the stairs, everyone joining the hug except Barty. Then Evan grabbed his arm and pulled him in too.
“I- I appreciate the sentiment guys- but if you suffocate me, I’ll have to go back to Pomfrey again!” Regulus said, struggling for air. They all reluctantly let go, Pandora sighed.
“Tell us everything!” She said, sitting down on the couches in the dorms, Regulus chuckled and relayed the information.
“With Potter?” Barty let out a low whistle, “he’s a looker” Evan threw a pillow at Barty.
“I s’pose he is” Regulus mumbled, the room went silent.
“Did he just?” Barty looked at Evan with a smirk, Evan nodded.
“Our Reg finally has a crush!” They both exclaimed, Regulus felt his cheeks warm up.
“I DO NOT!” Reg snapped, “I think Pandora looks quite nice too, doesn’t mean I fancy her!”
Barty let out a laugh,” Yeah! But when you say it like you did, it’s different!” Barty ever so helpfully explained. Regulus rolled his eyes.
“How exactly did I say it, Barty?” Regulus asked, unamused.
Evan did that basic Disney princess pose, where you put your hands together and swooned “Oh I suppose he is!” Evan said, exaggerating every word.
“Oh fuck you lot” Regulus grumbled, fumbling for a nice satin pillow to throw at Evan and Barty.
“Stop teasing Reg guys” Pandora chuckled, patting Regulus on the back. “It’s not his fault he’s falling for Potter.”
“Oi! Not helpful Pandora!”
“I’m very helpful, and besides, everyone has fallen for Potter before, it’s not like you won’t get over it”
“I’m not falling for Potter!” He snapped, standing up and storming off to his dorms.
“If you ever find out how long it is, I would like to know!” Barty called, before being tackled by Evan.
Regulus sighed, lying back on the bed. The sheets were a nice silk, courtesy of his mother, they were a sickly dark green. He was angry, angry at Barty, and Evan and even Pandora now. He was mad at his family, he was mad at everything right now. Especially Potter. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes, even if he did have feelings for the Gryffindor boy, which he didn’t, Potter would surely never love him the same way.

Chapter Text

JAMES-
He made his way back to the common room, his name floating through his head spoken in Reggie’s voice. His heart was doing acrobatics at this point as he climbed the stairs. He silently climbed up the stairs, his red converse being a stark contrast to the dark grey stone stairs. He heard Peaves in the background laughing his arse off. He felt a draft float through the hallway, making the hairs on his arms stand up.
All he knew was that Sirius would fucking kill him. God, fancying his best mate’s brother. Wait, fancying? James cursed, when did that thought get there. He let out a sharp exhale and made his way to the common room and up to his dorms.
“Oh my god! James, how's Reg?” Sirius was anxiously pacing across the rug. James had bought it from a nice muggle shop with Remus and Sirius last summer. They referred to it as Sirius’s pacing rug. It was a nice red and orange, matching the Gryffindor colours. They had all been overjoyed at the sight and immediately purchased it. Peter had thought the idea was nuts when they told him, but James was elated. He felt like an old married man getting excited over something like a rug, but it felt special to them. It was the first thing they had all bought together, something that was truly theirs. The middle had been worn out from the amount of pacing everyone did on it.
“He’s been like this all morning,” Remus grumbled, rubbing his temples. “Wouldn’t even accept a cigarette to calm him down”
“Well excuse me for being worried about my brother” Sirius snapped, Remus rolled his eyes dramatically.
“Thought you hated him” Peter grumbled, which made Sirius falter slightly and hit him with a pillow.
“He’s fine Pads” James chuckled, and Sirius immediately relaxed, flopping back on Remus’s bed.
“Oh thank god” Sirius let out a breath. Remus ran a hand through Padfoot’s hair.
“Told you” Remus whispered, “he was fine this morning, and he’s fine now. I’m going back to bed,” Remus grumbled, “He barely slept, and therefore kept me up with all his pacing” Sirius shot him a look.
“Again, he’s my brother, I was fucking worried!” Sirius cried, lying back on Remus’s bed with a huff of annoyance. James sat next to him.
“He called me James” he whispered, almost scared to admit it, like it wouldn’t be real anymore. Sirius studied him slowly.
“He was probably woozy from the medicine Pomfrey gave him” Sirius concluded after a moment of collective stunned silence. James knew this was supposed to make him feel better, but it didn’t. It really bloody didn’t.
“Yeah” James nodded, his throat felt tight. Like something forbidden was welled up in there. James could feel Remus's sleepy suspicious eyes on his neck, seeing right through him. James always hated how Moony could do that, it was like his talent. James found it funny because it still had taken him until just last month to realize Sirius was absolutely mad about him. He was glad it happened when it did, because if he had to sit through one more argument between the two he didn’t know what he was going to do.
The rest of the day the group went along with their usual activities, school, mild pranking, and Sirius and Remus sneaking off a few times. James didn't want to find them. He kept an eye out for Reg, who was nowhere to be seen. James was unsure if this was unusual or not, because he usually didn’t go looking for Sirius’s little brother.
Later that night, James couldn’t sleep, he fidgeted with the snitch until he had enough paper cuts and gave up. He tried sleeping as a deer and nearly broke his bed, he tried reading, he didn’t have the attention span for Remus’s muggle poetry. This Posiedon guy sounded like a real dick. Eventually he gave up with a frustrated huff. James fumbled for the invisibility cloak and Marauders map. As he opened it, everyone was in their common rooms. Everyone except Regulus A Black. In the astronomy tower.
James paused, holding the old paper in his hands in momentary shock. It occurred to him that he had seen Reg there before, but always brushed it off, never bringing it up to anyone because he was afraid of the wrath of Sirius. Sirius and Regulus’s relationship was complicated. Sirius refused to talk about it. James got an idea, it was a horrible idea, but at least he had something to do. He stood up, feeling the cool fabric of the cloak in his hands. He opened the brass doorknob and crept through the common room.
James crept through the halls, taking shallow breaths. He was silently praying Mrs. Norris wouldn’t detect him. He hated that damned cat more than he hated- He paused, trying to think of something he hated. There were a lot of things he disliked, sure, but hate was reserved for the worst people, like Mrs. Norris. James probably only hated Snape, or anyone related to Sirius and Regulus more than Mrs. Norris.
He made it to the astronomy tower safely. He paused at the door when he heard a faint noise. Was Regulus Black humming? James had to suppress a laugh as he heard “Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy” come through the door. James was even more shocked when he started singing it quietly.
“Oh my god.” James wheezed silently.
“Ooh love, ooh lover boy!” Regulus sang, his voice at a volume level used for conversation. James clutched his side, leaning against the door, barely suppressing his laughter. He waited until Regulus was done with the song to open the door, clapping.
“Amazing performance, encore! Encore!” James grinned as Regulus yelped.
“What the fuck oh my god potter holy shit what the-” Regulus sputtered, shocked and angry. James flopped down beside him.
“I love that song” He said with a chuckle. Reg stared at him incredulously.
“How long were you standing there?” Regulus asked, his voice tight, but James didn’t miss the pink to his sharp pale cheeks.
“Ever since like the second verse”
“You- youre fucking kidding.
“Nope” James ruffled his hair, which earned a his from Reg as he swatted his hand away, glaring daggers that would pierce anyone sane’s heart. So it was a good thing James was not sane, even if he wore his heart on his sleeve. Regulus shot his hands up in anger at the sky, letting out an exasperated sigh.
“Stalking me now?”
“Yes”
“People don’t usually admit that”
“Well Reggie, I’m not the usual”
“Don’t call me that Potter” Reg swatted him away.
“Hey!” James pouts with a chuckle “I thought we upgraded to James!”
“I don’t remember that” Regulus said, maybe exhaustion was getting to James, but he saw a hint of a smile play in his eyes. James decided to hope for that.
“You said it in the hallway after I fucking chased you across the grounds” James said with a snort.
“Nothing is coming to mind”
“Are you always so pissy?” James pouted.
“Yes.” Regulus said simply, earning a groan from James. They sat in surprisingly comfortable silence until James spoke up again.
“Why’re you up here anyways?” He asked softly.
“Stargazing” James was for some reason surprised.
“Really?”
“Yes potter, I have hobbies”
“But stargazing?”
“Yes.” Regulus glared at James sharply. James huffed a sigh.
“Is this entertaining to you?” He asked slowly.
“Yes”
“How?”
“If I tell you will you go the fuck away?” James nodded quickly with a slight grin. Regulus rolled his eyes but started talking. He pointed to what James assumed was a constellation. “That’s Orion over there” Regulus said, James frowned, squinting his eyes.
“That one?” He asked, pointing to a constellation, Regulus shook his head in amusement.
“No, that one” Reg grabbed James’s hand, guiding it, seeming to not know what he was doing. James felt his cheeks warm as the younger boy’s hand brushed the paper cut from the snitch earlier.
“Oh- er, cool” He whispered, his heart thumping in his chest. They sat there in comfortable silence, James didn’t dare move his hand. He was scared to make any noise that might ruin this moment. Regulus slowly turned to look at James, they stared at each other for a moment. James looked at his eyes, they were a beautiful grey green like a lake. They were softer than he had ever seen them. He sat there, entranced for a long while. Regulus swallowed slowly.
“I should be going” He coughed, standing up. James’s heart dropped slightly, he felt slightly empty and his hand felt cold. He was about to say something, but Regulus had already left, shutting the oak door behind him quickly. James sat there, his hand slowly lowering back to his lap. He exhaled softly, feeling a smile play across his lips.
“Damn.” He whispered, lying back on the cold wood floor, reminiscing about the feeling of Reggie’s hand on his. He let out a soft chuckle, his cheeks were probably tinged with pink by now. He stared at the stars, wondering if Regulus’s constellation was out there. He blew the sky a kiss just in case, his hand resting in the air as he stared at it. Regulus’s hand had been there moments ago, touching his. His soft gray eyes had met James’s with an odd sense of vulnerability. James longed to look at them again.
After the sun started to come up, James figured he should head back. He sat up and left the cold dark tower, walking down the stairs and back to the Gryffindor common room. As he crept to his dorms, he let out a sigh of relief that Sirius was still asleep. He figured he was safe until
“Morning James” Remus’s smug voice came from the red cushioned chair from across the room, making James jump, nearly dropping the cloak. James could practically hear Remus’s smirk in his voice.
“Er- Morning” He said, trying to regain his composure.
“Have a nice night?”
“Er- what do you mean?” Remus just held up the map James had left on his nightstand.
“Regulus?”
“Er- it’s not like that”
“You sure?” Remus’s eyebrow was arched all the way up now, though there was still an annoyingly amused smirk on his face.
“Yeah- He just- We just- He-” James fumbled, his tongue seeming to betray him with a sudden stutter.
“Jeez you're worse than I thought” Moony snorted, shaking his head.
“Oi! What’s that s’posed to mean!” James protested, trying to fight down the pink in his caramel coloured cheeks.
“Wait ‘till Pads figure out you have the hots for his little brother!” A laugh escaped the taller boy’s pale lips.
“I- no-” James’s heart rate picked up, “You cannot tell Sirius!” he pleaded.
“Ah, so there is something going on then?”
“What- Moony you little-” James felt like he was malfunctioning, "You're bloody infuriating sometimes, you know that?” He snapped back, his cheeks still hot. Instead of flinching at this, or even making some remark of James’s outburst, Remus just laughed. James’s fists clenched, anger bubbling up in his stomach. “It- it’s not funny!” He cried, his voice cracking. Remus paused, laughter subsiding.
“Mate you okay?” Remus’s hand found James’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“I don’t fucking know Moony” James whispered, sitting on Remus’s bed.
“Wanna talk about it?”
“I-” James exhaled, shaking his head. “There isn't much to talk about.”
“Well, wanna tell me what happened in the tower?” Remus asked softly.
“He was singing Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy” James started.
“Sorry, Regulus Black? Who couldn’t even be bothered to talk to me when we had detention together, was singing?” Remus snorted in disbelief.
“Yeah” James nodded, “So when he finished I walked in and he got all embarrassed” It was so cute, James thought to himself. James proceeded to relay the events of last night best he could but still leaving parts like the hand thing, or the prolonged eye contact. Anything really that would make it seem romantic, which it wasn't. James repeated that over and over in his head, trying desperately to convince himself of it.
“Sirius is going to freak” Remus snorted after James finished.
“No- Moony please don’t tell him he” James started, his hands wringing anxiously in his lap.
“I was kidding Prongs” Remus reassured him softly. “I won’t tell him unless I need to.”
“Thank you” James pulled Remus into a hug, trying to rid himself of the unease in his stomach.
“Fuck James you smell like a rat’s ass” Remus gagged and James let go of him quickly, remembering that he had not showered since quidditch practice two days ago. James grimaced.
“I- yeah, I should go shower” James muttered, Remus was holding his nose dramatically. James just chuckled and walked off towards the showers.

Chapter Text

PETER-

Peter had heard all of that. He wasn’t usually an early riser, but James didn’t exactly have quiet feet. Maybe he was feeling a bit evil today, maybe he wanted to spite Sirius, maybe he was just bored. Whatever it was, he was going to pay Regulus a little visit. After James left, Peter crawled out of bed, yawning and stretching. He stood, fumbling for a jumper that fit. He picked one up off the floor that smelled strongly of Remus. Peter quickly sniffed the armpits, the fabric was soft in his hand. After a minute he deduced that it was clean enough to wear and exchanged it for the white t-shirt he had slept in. He pulled on some pants and went to the bathrooms to clean up.
When he got in he was greeted with the intense steam from a shower. Peter had forgotten James had been showering.
“Morning mate” He called out, and James’s horrible rendition of Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy had halted.
“Oh- er mornin’ Pete” James called out cheerfully. Peter went to comb his hair and brush his teeth.
“Where were you last night?” He asked, a smirk playing on his lips. He had to mess with James, it was only fair.
“I-er Potions work-” James sputtered, “Sluggy asked me to pick something up” Peter suppressed a laugh, rolling his eyes.
“Right”
“Honestly” James cried, a bit too desperately for a man who was supposedly telling the truth.
“Never said I didn’t believe you mate” Peter snorted, going back to brushing his teeth. James spoke up after a good few minutes.
“What got you up so early?” He asked, clearly desperate to change the subject of the already dead conversation.
“Going to see Reg for chess” Peter felt his own smirk grow as James struggled for a reply.
“Cool- Cool very cool” James muttered, Peter could hear the flustered tone in his voice. Eventually James had finished showering and ushered Peter out of the foggy bathroom so he could change. Peter didn’t exactly get it, because they were all guys, and it’s not like he hadn’t seen it before. But he obliged anyway, pulling on his shoes and exiting the common room. He waved to Marlene, who was laying across Dorcas’s lap, ranting to her about quidditch and what not. Dorcas was probably the only slytherin that everyone agreed was allowed in the common room. She was nice enough, Peter didn’t mind her anyways.
He made his way down the hall, wracking his mind on what he could say to make Regulus fall for James. He went back to their earlier conversation, and he got it. It was an evil idea, he had to suppress a laugh. He now knew, one good sure to work way, to at least get Regulus to think about James.
Peter was acquaintances at the least with Sirius’s younger brother. Unlike the other Marauders, Peter wasn’t aggressively bitter towards the boy. Sure he had been friendly with him to piss Sirius off in the beginning, but Peter had grown fond of him after a while. He was an amazing chess competitor, and had almost actually beat Peter a few times. They studied together a bit when they both found themselves in the library alone, hiding from their chaotic friends. Sure enough, Regulus was in the library, sitting in the corner reading a potions book or something.
Peter made his way across the library, his shoes making the soft carpet crunch below their feet. The library had been fitted with carpets over the summer to account for shoe noises. This was both a pro and a con, because sure the noises were toned down slightly, but that also meant that someone had to clean them. Usually him and his friends. Peter usually didn’t get caught much, but when he did, it was always for those nasty pranks, which in turn got a nasty punishment. Peter swore Snape purposefully tracked mud in there, or spilled his, ‘Posh boy tea’, as Remus put it.
“Hey Reg” Peter called, sitting down across from him. The black haired boy looked up, a slight smile on his lips.
“Hey Peter, here for a rematch?” Regulus smirked, “I think I can beat you this time”
“In your dreams Black” Peter smirked, unfolding his chess board, the white marble pieces were cool in his hand and he laid them across the checkered wood. The games started off simple, Peter knew almost every trick in the bag at this point.
“So, I was talking to James earlier, he was in the shower,” Peter smirked, he could see Regulus trying to plague any dirty thoughts away, obviously failing.
“Oh?” He said, suddenly very interested in his knight piece.
“Yeah, I didn’t see anything obviously, though it’s not like I haven't before” Peter said, moving a pawn.
“Are you two-” Regulus started, clearly very flustered, Peter cut him off with a laugh.
“Oh god no! James is like my brother”
“Okay then” Regulus nodded slowly, his finger tapping on the hard wood table.
“Why do you ask?” Peter teased, Regulus was refusing to look at him. “Are you planning to shoot your shot or something?" Peter teased with a grin. Regulus sputtered for a moment.
“What? Me- Potter? He- No!” Regulus got out before Peter dissolved into giggles. “Oh fuck you” Regulus grumbled, throwing a discarded chess piece at him.
“Sorry mate” Peter said, still grinning, “Couldn’t resist.” Regulus shot him an icy glare. They played in silence for a bit before Peter spoke up again. “You wanna know what it’s like?”
“Pardon?” Regulus asked, his mouth falling slightly open.
“James,” Peter said vaguely, trying to tamp down the giddy smirk fighting to take over his face.
“You and him-?” Regulus thought, barely conceiving the thought.
“No! Get your mind out of the gutter Black” Peter teased, poking his shoulder with his wand. “I meant what James is like in general, unless you want to know anything else?” Peter teased. Regulus’s mouth was opened comically wide now, his grey eyes stared in shock at Peter as the chess piece slid out of his hand.
“What the fuck-” Regulus breathed
“He has a tattoo on his inner thigh, it’s a bloody snitch” Peter continued as if Regulus wasn’t visibly dying of gay panic. “Sirius decided we should all get one, and James wanted it in a place where no one would see it” Peter snorted. “I have one on my back, it’s a rat.”
It had been around fifth year, the boys decided to follow Remus into muggle London on christmas break. Inevitably a muggle tattoo shop had caught Sirius’s eye and insisted they all went in. Sirius had chatted with the guy, scanning the tattoos and eventually landing on his star constellation. That was when the trouble had started. The boys hadn’t known you needed to be legally eighteen to get a tattoo, so when the man asked them for their ID, chaos erupted. Sirius tried to lie his way out of it, saying the boys had forgotten their ID’s, but when he was denied, his temper decided to act up.
In the end, they got kicked out, with James furiously apologizing and Remus shouting at Sirius. But the chaos hadn’t stopped there. Apparently Sirius hadn’t dropped the idea of the tattoos, because right before the summer holidays, he decided to bring it up again. Apparently he had learned how to make basically painless tattoos for free. Though Remus had said that took all the fun out of it. Sirius had offered to do the designs, being the most artistic of the three. Remus had gotten the Lupus constellation on his right forearm, Sirius had gotten his constellation in the same spot. Peter couldn’t decide what to do, so he just decided to do the rat thing.
“I see,” Regulus said after a long beat of silence. Peter moved his piece again.
“Checkmate.” He smirked at Regulus, who seemed too lost in his own thoughts to care about the loss.
“Sirius did the tattoo?” Regulus asked after a moment, Peter watched his face go through about seven stages, ranging from confusion to horror to flustered.
“Yeah, but apparently it was pretty hard due to the size-” Peter was cut off by Regulus abruptly standing up.
“That’s enough!” He said, his voice high. Regulus promptly jogged out as inconspicuously as he could and Peter dissolved into laughter. He was then kicked out for the day by the librarian, but it was totally worth it.
Peter made his way back to the common room, Sirius was draped across the couch smoking, Remus was curled up in a chair reading.
“Good afternoon, where’s James?” Peter asked.
“Oh he went out to do” Sirius made a vague hand motion.
“I see,” Peter nodded, retreating to the dorms. As he sat on the bed, reading a potions book, he replayed the earlier conversation in his head, trying to suppress his laughter. He went to pull on his pajamas, stretching out on his bed. The sheets were nice and soft, courtesy of his parents. He yawned, fumbling for his food stash. A moment later, the door flew open. James stood there, his face a deep red, glasses messed up, his tie undone in a heap. His black hair was even more of a rat’s nest than usual, the hair falling in his eyes and the beginnings of bruises forming on his neck.
“Oh my god.” He whispered. James’s eyes were wide with a comical sort of panic.
“Hey mate,” Peter said nonchalantly.
“What the flying fuck did you do?” James whispered, pacing across the rug now.
“I didn’t do anything!” Peter protested, he was a good actor when it counted.
“You- You-” James laid down on his bed, huffing a heavy sigh of defeat.
“What happened?” Peter prompted, now fully invested in this.
“He kissed me Peter” James whispered, as if still trying desperately to process this fact.
“Who kissed you?”
“Don’t make me say it” The words were choked out in a whisper. Peter nodded slowly in understanding. Peter wasn’t a relationship expert or anything, he had dated around casually for a bit, but had never had anything that put him in such a state.
“Is he a good kisser?” Peter asked after a while, wanting to break the silence.
“You have no idea” James breathed, staring up at the tan ceiling.
“Tounge?” the other boy nodded, somehow growing even more red.
“Sirius is gonna kill me” James whispered.
“You don’t have to tell him” Peter pointed out.
“I can’t just not tell my best mate I hooked up with-” James choked on a mix between a watery laugh and a sob.
“Ouch” Peter chuckled, slightly offended that Sirius was James’s best mate and not him. He decided not to hold it against him due to James’s obvious gay panic. “It’s technically not lying” Peter supplied, James stared at him incredulously.
“I don’t think that makes it any better!” He cried, pulling a white pillow over his head.
“Your’e such a goody two shoes” Peter tutted with a huffed sigh.”Just don’t bring it up, if it never comes up in conversation he can’t exactly blame you for not telling him”
“I- you- bloody hell” James groaned, running both his hands through his hair in frustration.
“I have a point!” Peter protested. There was a loud groan let out by his friend, the sound muffled by the pillow.
“I suppose”
“See, listen to your mate James, I’m always right” Peter said, a grin spreading across his features.
“That is blatantly wrong” James frowned, his face a mix of confusion and flusteredness from earlier.
“Excuse you?” Peter said dramatically, throwing a pillow at James.
“You heard me” The taller boy grinned, standing up and grabbing his own pillow.
“Oh you’re on” Peter grinned mischievously, fumbling for another pillow and standing on his bed. James struck first, the pillow hitting Peter square in the stomach. Peter bounced back, hitting James in the back. It went on like this for a good ten minutes, both boys laughing in pure childish bliss. James ended up tackling Peter onto the bed, tickling him until Peter couldn’t breathe. The boys both laid down on Peter’s bed, giggling in a heap of pillows and blankets.
“You’re the best Pete” James laughed, sprawled across the bed.
“I know,” Peter grinned, panting slightly.
“Isn’t it crazy we’re graduating this year?” James asked softly.
“Yeah.”
“I don’t think I’m prepared to go out and be an adult Pete.”
“I don’t think anyone actually ever is.” Peter rolled over to face James, who was messing with the hem of his tie.
“When did you get smart?” James teased.
“I’ve always been smart!” Peter protested with a laugh.
“You’re right,” James shook his head, amused.
“Oh fuck you” Peter chuckled, siting up and studying James, specifically his newfound hickies. “You should go to the girls tomorrow, they probably have something to cover that up.”
“Cover what up?” James asked, seeming to somehow have forgotten his earlier meeting with Regulus.
“Mate- Just go check the mirror” Peter said, putting his hand over his mouth to suppress his laughter at James’s innocent confusion. The other boy slowly crossed the room to the mirror on the dresser. He opened his eyes slowly and his jaw dropped.
“Fuck.”
“Indeed” He agreed sagely. “Marlene probably has some foundation for you that will fix it, don’t worry” Peter said, James was still studying the purple spots on his neck in fascination. “Do they hurt?”
“No,” James mumbled. Peter nodded.
“Should I go get something from Marlene now?” Pater asked, knowing James would probably jump off a bridge if Sirius saw them. James swallowed then nodded.
Peter made his way to the common room, Marlene was half heartedly playing gobstones with Mary, but neither of them seemed into it.
“Hey Marls? Can I talk to you real quick?” Peter asked, Marlene looked up, grateful for some sort of escape from the game.
“‘Course Pete, what’s up?” She said, standing up and following Peter to the corner.
“There’s a bit of a hickey problem” Peter said slowly, once he was sure everyone was out of ear shot. Marlene looked at Peter’s neck with a frown.
“Who’s?” She asked, they’ve had this conversation before.
“Er- James” Peter said and Marlene grinned.
“Finally!” She cried, and Peter shushed her. “Who was it?”
“Er- I can’t tell” Peter sighed. Marlene frowned in understanding.
“Yeah yeah okay” She rolled her eyes, “Was it a guy or a girl?” She asked after a moment of contemplation.
“A guy,” Peter said, and Marlene grinned.
“Great! Mary owes me six of her best chocolate frogs!”
“Wait- You bet on who James had kissed?” Peter asked in amusement.
“Hell yeah! When we saw him walk in, we couldn’t resist” Marlene laughed.
“Bloody hell Marlene, you lot are mental” Peter snorted, “So, do you have anything that would work for James?” Marlene nodded absentmindedly, still grinning.
“Yeah probably, I’m sure Mary also has some muggle makeup around his colour”
“Great” Peter started, Marlene turned to leave but Peter grabbed her arm, “Hey Marls? Could you-,” Peter let out a huffed sigh, “Maybe just, er, keep it under wraps a bit. James is- He’s a bit embarrassed about the whole thing” Peter said carefully, Marlene could clearly tell there was more to this debacle, but she didn’t push.
“Course I can Pete, you can count on me, and Mary” She flashed him a wide grin before happily jogging back over to Mary and whispering something in her ear. Mary let out a groan of defeat but was still grinning. After a bit of back and forth, the girls retreated to their dorms. Peter shook his head in exasperation and sighed.
He made his way back to the couch, sinking down with a yawn. He fumbled for a book on the wood table. His hand landed on one, it had a soft paper cover, he pondered for a moment. Peter picked the book up and sighed, it would do. He started to read, flipping through the pages, wondering what exactly had happened to James.

Chapter Text

JAMES-
(Much, much earlier)
James walked off to the showers, the fact that he smelled was now ungodly prominent, filling his nostrils with a foul odor. He walked across the blue tile, slowly undressing and turning on the shower. The mirror fogged. The bathroom’s layout was pretty simple, it was apparently larger than any bathroom Remus had ever seen though, so he wondered if muggles were behind in bathroom technology. They had three sinks to the right of the bathroom, with a mirror above each, the wall was curved slightly. Speaking of the walls, they were a pale gray tile, with multiple doodles on them ranging from dicks to lions.
To the left there were three showers and a toilet off to the side, James slid inside. The hot water hit his back, it was a good wake up call. He started to sing Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy, the song Regulus had sung earlier that week. He thought about the night, still grinning. Maybe it was foolish he was still giddy about it, but James didn’t mind. He would relish in the experience until he fucking died.
The door to the bathroom opened and Peter’s voice rang out through the space. James stopped singing immediately. He wasn’t embarrassed or anything, it just felt personal in an odd way. Like sharing anything about that night would make it less real.
“Where were you last night?” Peter questioned, and James’s heart decided to basically stop right then and there. He sucked in a breath, eyes wide. That was the one good thing about being in the shower, Peter couldn’t see his expressions. James was usually an easily readable person, so he took this as a pro. His brain went through about forty different excuses until he landed one one, which he dubbed most believable. He didn’t quite remember the words coming out of his mouth, something about Sluggy.
“Right,” Peter’s tone was skeptical, making James curse under his breath, he was starting to panic.
“Honestly!” He cried, he was now pacing in the shower best he could. Peter then mentioned seeing Regulus for chess and James’s mouth went dry. His brain kind of stopped a bit. Peter knew. Peter definitely knew. There was no way the other boy couldn’t know. James let out a dry reply, ushering Peter out of the bathroom, praying that he would be able to dodge the confrontation a bit longer.
He crept out of the bathroom once he knew Peter had left the tower. He spent his time pacing across the rug, trying to gaslight himself into not finding Regulus hot. James was straight. He liked girls. You couldn’t do both right? It was men or women. And Regulus wasn’t even that sexy, with his perfectly angled cheek bones, his perfect little hands, his slutty waist-
James cut that train of thought off angrily, groaning softly. Fuck. He was so fucked. So totally and utterly fucked. He flopped onto his bed, making some noise of anguish into his pillow. His cheeks were still warm and he finally just let himself think. He thought about Regulus, his perfect eyes, thin lips. The thought made him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Eventually he decided he at least had to talk to Regulus. Nothing weird or romantic, at best just some closure. Maybe he could convince himself Regulus hated him enough and get over this weird fling.
He got up, walking over to the door and into the common rooms. Sirius and Remus were sitting there as they usually did on a day with no classes.
“Where are you off to Prongs?” Sirius asked as he strutted across the common room. James made a vague hand motion as he reached the door.
“Off,” He muttered, and left it at that. He was on a mission. He made his way to the library, shoes clicking against the tile. He didn’t know what he would do when he got there, luckily he didn’t need to find out. The great big oak doors swung open and Regulus stormed out, his face an unnatural shade of red. James decided to seize the opportunity.
“Hey Reg?” The younger boy’s head snapped up, his eyes widening and staring into James’s, then slowly trailing down to where his snitch tattoo was located. Peter had meddled big time. Regulus clamped his lips between his teeth,his grey eyes were wide, James shifted self-consciously. “Reg?” He repeated, and whatever daze the 6th year had been in was gone. Regulus grabbed James’s arm in a shaky hand, dragging him through the hall. James let out a slow stream of protests, but in all honesty he was curious as to where Regulus was taking him.
He found himself in a nook of the castle. James knew this halfway was only ever used as a makeout spot or a good place for pranks. He looked down at Regulus, arching an eye in confusion. The slytherin had a hungry glint in his eyes as he stared at James. Then he grabbed James by the red tie and bent him down to his level. Before James could protest, Regulus’s lips were on his, and much to James’s surprise, he himself deepened the kiss. Regulus’s hand found its way to James’s hair, and James was pushed back against the wall. They kissed until James’s lungs hurt, but Regulus didn’t stop there. James didn’t want him to stop. Regulus’s lips made their way to James’s neck, his sharp inhales were the only sound being made in the quiet hallway.
“Regulus what the fuck are you doing?” James whispered. Regulus paused at the fourth button on James’s shirt.
“Do you want me to stop?” He whispered softly. James swallowed, slowly shaking his head. Regulus continued, unbuttoning his shirt halfway down. Regulus’s thin pale hands were on his red tie, unfolding it rapidly. James let himself soak in the moment, breathing in Regulus’s scent. His hand gripped the Slytherin’s soft curly hair, it was much shorter than Sirius’s, who had let his hair grow out as an act of rebellion against his mother. James’s hand moved to take Regulus’s cloak off.
The careful balance of the moment shattered. Regulus drew back with a sharp inhale, seeming to finally realize what the fuck he had been doing. James blinked, studying Regulus. The boy looked panicked, pulling his robe back up his arms with force.
“Hey- Reg, I’m sorry” James whispered, he didn’t know why he was apologizing, but Regulus was uncomfortable and it was all his fault. “I- if- you don’t- I can-” James couldn’t breath, his words were tripping over each other, fighting to exit his stupid mouth. He didn’t want Regulus to leave. He wanted the boy to kiss him, to hug him, to do anything other than look at him like he was about to hit him. James extended his hand, it was trembling slightly. Regulus flinched away, fumbling for the door handle behind him. James just let him go.
After the door shut behind him, James sank to the floor, eyes going blurry with what were presumably tears. James looked at his hands, inhaling shakily. Regulus had been there only moments ago, in his arms. His heart ached, he wondered what had happened to Regulus that had made him so desperate for James. Regulus had only been in the library with- James felt a surge of anger bubble up in his chest. Regulus had been in the library with Peter.
James felt horribly betrayed, Pete was his best mate! What had he even said to get Regulus to this state? James decided he did not want to know. He pressed himself off the cold floor, stumbling slightly as he stood. He grabbed the cold handle of the door, no longer warm with Regulus’s touch. He picked up into a jog, maybe it was a sprint, James wasn’t aware enough to know. He climbed the stairs, a few portraits shooting him comments. James held up a shaky middle finger and continued running.
He made it to the common room, his hand pushing the rough wood door open. Sirius and Remus looked up instantly, Sirius’s mouth hanging comically open.
“Prongs?” Sirius asked, his voice heavy with confusion and amusement.
“Peter,” He whispered, his voice hoarse from the earlier events. “Where is he?”
“Er- in the dorms?” James nodded and continued to run. He swung open another door and there Peter was. He was sitting innocently, like nothing had happened. James wanted to strangle him.
“Oh my god” He whispered, hoping that enough anger would leak into his tone. It clearly didn’t work because Peter only looked up casually.
“Hey mate,” Peter smiled at him. Smiled.
“What the flying fuck did you do” James growled, his fists clenching at his side. He went to the rug, methodically pacing back and forth.
“I didn’t do anything!” Peter sounded offended, James felt his anger bubble over. He walked over.
“You- you!” James was about to scream, but he felt something well up in his throat. His anger disappeared, like it had been washed away. He flopped onto the bed next to Peter. His rage was replaced with a dull ache. His heart felt heavy in his chest. James wanted to scream, cry, and kiss Regulus’s infuriating face all at once.
“What happened?” Peter asked, James resisted the urge to roll his eyes or glare. He felt a sob well up in his throat, like he was choking.
“He kissed me Peter,” James whispered. Had Regulus kissed him? His neck throbbed like he had, but what if James was dreaming? What if it wasn’t real. Admitting it, made it feel unreal. Because what if it wasn’t? The conversation continued, James was on the verge of tears and hysterics. Then Peter hit him with a pillow, and he realized how silly he was being. Regulus had initiated it. James didn’t want it. James liked girls. You couldn’t do both. It didn’t work like that.
James’s anger continued to dissipate as he bashed Peter with a pillow. He was laughing, giggling even. Though James wasn’t sure if they were the same thing or not. He was James fucking Potter. Why was he so wrecked over a stupid kiss? It was just a kiss. Or technically snogging he supposed. James collapsed on the bed next to Peter, his sides hurt from laughter. Once the two boys calmed down, James decided to speak up, voice hoarse from earlier events.
“You’re the best Pete“ James meant it, Peter would always be there for him, even if he had meddled.
“I know,” Peter grinned, panting slightly.
“Isn’t it crazy we’re graduating this year?” The thought was almost alien to James, they were going to graduate, fight in the war. James tried not to think about the war, it made his insides squirm slightly.
“Yeah.”
“I don’t think I’m prepared to go out and be an adult Pete.” The thought made James physically sick. He would be an adult. Fully grown, with taxes and wars and houses.
“I don’t think anyone actually ever is.” James felt the bed shift as Peter rolled over.
“When did you get smart?” James teased.
“I’ve always been smart!” Peter protested with a laugh.
“You’re right,” James shook his head, amused.
“Oh fuck you” Peter chuckled, siting up and studying James. James wondered what he was looking at, maybe his messed up tie? “You should go to the girls tomorrow, they probably have something to cover that up.”
“Cover what up?” James asked, confusion taking over. What had he done that he needed to cover up?
“Mate- Just go check the mirror” Peter said, putting his hand over his mouth to suppress his laughter at James’s innocent confusion. The other boy slowly crossed the room to the mirror on the dresser. He opened his eyes slowly and his jaw dropped.
“Fuck.” Panic gripped James like an iron fist. He was covered in love bites. Part of it made James feel giddy. He was Regulus’s. James pushed that thought down into his chest with all the other bad thoughts he wasn’t fond of. Peter said something about Marlene, but James wasn’t listening.
“Do they hurt?” Peter asked, and it occurred to James that Peter had never had a hickey, or done anything more than light snogging with anyone before. James almost didn’t answer, maybe he did. They didn’t hurt, they just felt unreal. Proof that Regulus had kissed him. Proof that James had kissed the Slytherin back. Peter said something about going to see Marlene. James nodded, swallowing the thick guilt coating his throat. James liked Regulus. He really did. He did so much that it made his chest hurt. He turned to say something to Peter, but the shorter boy was gone. James sighed, looking at his neck again.
He didn’t exactly know how many hours had passed since Peter had left, but it had grown dark. He heard a knock at the wooden door and James jumped at the sound. He stood up slowly, and a selfish part of him wondered if it was Regulus. But then he heard a girl’s voice call his name. Specifically Marlene’s.
“Yo James!” She called, pounding on the door again. “I got your stuff!” James cringed, so much for being discreet. He opened the door with a heavy sigh.
“Thanks Marls.” He muttered, trying to cover up his neck with his hands. Marlene rolled her eyes.
“James, James, James” She tutted, shaking her head with an amused smile on her face. “I’mm not gonna just give these to you! I need to know everything, because Peter is annoyingly loyal and wouldn’t tell me shit!” Marlene threw her hands up, like this was the craziest thing she had ever heard, “I mean can you believe him!” She said, James shook his head, still in a daze. “So! I’ll hide your hickeys if you babble the boba bitch!” James blinked in confusion.
“Babble the- Babble the what?” James asked. What the fuck was boba?
“Oh! Boba! It’s a wizard drink in Taiwan! It’s not popular yet, but someday I think it’s gonna be a hit! It’s like tea with pudding balls in it.” Marlene energetically explained. James nodded, understanding the concept.
“So why babble the boba?” He asked slowly.
“Becuase spill the tea is boring! And it gives me an excuse to say bitch.” Marlene smirked, walking inside and sitting on James’s bed. She patted the cushion beside her, like James needed an invite to sit on his own bed. He rolled his eyes playfully, but complied, sitting down. Marlene got to work, and James started talking. He didn’t name Regulus though, and could tell Marlene was annoyed, but she didn’t push. James appreciated that.
“Are-” James inhaled, “are you allowed to like both? Girls and guys I mean?” The question came out in a whisper, his voice cracked at the end. Marlene put down the blending sponge, frowning.
“I’m pretty sure, Mary does, so does Lils”
“But- Aren’t there rules?” James asked desperately, Marlene shook her head.
“I don’t think there really are, as long as you’re not like children or animals,” She grimaced at the thought, and James gagged.
“Oh hell no, gross. So….” James trailed off, messing with his snitch again. “What should I do next?” He whispered, Marlene studied him.
“You could ask ‘em out, at worst they say no, right?” James wished it was that simple. Was it that simple? Probably not. James nodded, swallowing. “If you’re worried about being seen in public with a guy,” Marlene started but James cut her off quickly.
“No! It- it’s not that, for me at least but…” He trailed off, thinking hard about Regulus’s family, if he went on a date with a guy, let alone James Potter, it wouldn’t go over well with them. James frowned, “Well, his family- they’re not very nice.” James muttered, that was the understatement of the century. “Where would I take him then? To go on a secret kind of date?”
“You lot sneak out a bunch to go to Hogsmeade don’t you?” Marlene asked, clearly proud she was the one who thought of this instead of James. James broke out into a grin.
“Marlene Mickinnon you're bloody brilliant!” James declared, tackling her in the biggest hug in the world. James knew exactly what to do.

Chapter Text

REGULS-

For the next week, Regulus avoided James Potter like the goddamn plague. He started skipping meals, just so he didn’t have to see him. Regulus was still horrified about what he’d done, he had kissed him. Fucking kissed the boy. What in god’s name had he been thinking! Barty had been bringing him his meals, not that he ate much of them anyways.
Currently Regulus was lying on his bed spiraling, like he had been doing for the past seven days. Barty walked in, he looked worried, which was fair. Regulus hadn’t exactly been talkative about his newfound hickeys and avoidant mood. He felt the bed squish under Barty’s light weight.
“Hey Reg” Barty said, clearly not thrilled over this conversation, which would no doubt contain emotions, which were not Barty Crouch Jr.’s strong suit in the slightest.
“Hey,” he muttered back.
“So…” Barty trailed off, pausing with a frustrated frown, “you, er, you wanna talk about it?”
“No Barty, I do not want to talk about it!” Regulus snapped, instead of flinching away like any normal person would Barty only snapped back.
“Oh excuse me for trying to fucking help!” Barty shouted, sitting up. “Because if you haven’t fucking noticed, we’re bloody worried!”
“Oh god forbid I feel shitty after kissing-” Regulus cut himself off with a sharp breath.
“Oh please! Who the fuck did you kiss? It can’t be that bad, you dramatic prick!”
“I kissed fucking James Potter!” Regulus shouted, or sobbed, he wasn’t exactly heard. Barty’s shoulders dropped.
“Oh shit.”
“Yeah” Regulus let out a watery laugh. “James Potter. Sirius is gonna kill him, or me. And- god does he even like guys Barty! He-” Regulus flopped back down. “What if I kissed him, and now nothing else happens, and it’s awkward forever!” He whispered. Barty frowned at him.
“If he doesn’t fucking like you I will personally kill him then” Barty stated, and Regulus honestly had no doubt that Barty would. Regulus shook his head.
“No- I- I should talk to him about it. Before we do any killing” He said reluctantly, Barty nodded with a shrug.
“Do whatever you want Reg, but if he hurts you Evan and I will fuck him up beyond recognition” Barty promised, his voice sincere. Regulus platonically loved Barty Crouch a lot. If Sirius was going to replace his brother with James, Regulus would replace him with Barty, and Evan. The two were kind of a package deal, them being clingy and in love and all that. The boys had met in the first year and had been inseparable since then. Barty had fallen for Evan almost immediately, although annoyingly he hadn’t realized it until fifth year. None of the three boys, including Evan himself, knew exactly when Evan had fallen for Barty. Evan said that it had happened gradually, and that he started to realize it after Barty got a girlfriend in third year. Evan had shaved her eyebrows in her sleep and to this day had no regrets over it. Regulus, Dorcas, Pandora, and probably all of Hogwarts at this point were just glad they finally stopped pining after each other daily.
Eventually the two dissolved into small talk over classes and how annoying certain teachers were. It grew dark in the dorms, leaving an odd sense of coziness in its wake. Regulus sat on his bed, Barty had left to go pester Evan a while ago, so Regulus took the opportunity to sort some things out. He liked cleaning, and Barty was a fucking mess. There were probably more of his tank tops on the ground than people in Hogwarts.That was a lot of tank tops. Regulus sighed, picking them up and placing them in the laundry bin. After he was done with that, the door barged open.
Evan and Barty were locked at the lips, hands on each other's necks. Annoyingly enough, this was a weekly occurrence. Barty pinned Evan onto one of the beds. Regulus stood up.
“Animals!” He cried, Barty just flipped him off, already working to pull Evan’s shirt off. Regulus stormed out in annoyance, not daring to go back in there until the next morning. He sunk down into a cushion by the fireplace, staring at the dancing flames and trying desperately not to think of what Evan and Barty were probably doing right now. He shuddered, looking around for a book or something to do. Then the door barged open yet again. If one more person dramatically opened a door today Regulus might actually drown himself in the lake. He didn’t even look up at first, praying it was just some annoying first year. That was until the unmistakable voice of James Potter cleared his throat.
“Hey… Regulus?” Regulus’s head snapped up in shock, his mouth agape. James was wearing a white button up dress shirt with a dark red tie and black straight jeans that were cuffed at the bottom. His hair was still an utter mess though, James assumably ran his hand through it a good hundred times before showing up at the door. He sounded nervous, his hand fiddled with a small golden ball, which Regulus realized was a snitch. His heart hammered in his chest as he studied James. He didn’t seem mad, which Regulus took as a pro.
“Yeah?” He whispered, which would be heard throughout the empty commonroom.
“I have a surprise for you” James said, smiling nervously but clearly trying to appear cocky. “If you’ll have me that is?”
“What-” Regulus cleared his throat, hoping his voice sounded less weak out loud than it did in his head. “What did you have in mind?”
“Well, I wanted to take you out.” James stated, “Liker on a date” Regulus’s heart stopped beating, or maybe it was going too fast now, he wasn’t sure. He gawked at the taller boy.
“A- A date? This is a joke right?” Regulus sputtered. James’s smile dropped.
“Er- no it’s not a joke, I- I know I can’t exactly ask you out during the day…” James trailed out, forming his sentence carefully, “So I thought we could go out, you know, during the night?” James face palmed, “Shit I sound like a fucking serial killer-” Regulus cut him off.
“I’ll go!” He blurted, although he wasn’t sure why exactly. On one hand, going out with James Potter sounded like the best night ever, and he no doubt planned a really cute date for the both of them. On the other hand, it was James Potter, the one who stole his brother, the one who- who Regulus had kissed. Passionately. Who hadn’t pulled away. Regulus weighed the scenario, picking it apart piece by piece. James had taken Regulus’s not-so-loving family into account, although Regulus was unsure if that was basic human decency or something James did because he cared about him. On the other hand, what if it was a joke? Or something James was doing because he wanted to experiment. After an ungodly amount of spiralling, Regulus realized James was calling his name.
“Reg? Regulus? Earth to Reggie?” James was in front of him now, Regulus jumped back, toppling out of the armchair. That was probably not very sexy was it? He scrambled to his feet awkwardly. He stared at James, who ran a hand through his hair and started speaking again. “You mean it? You’ll go?” He asked, almost as if he had misheard Regulus. The Slytherin boy nodded.
“Yeah, where to Potter?” He asked, and James pouted like a child.
“Seriously! You fucking kissed me! I feel like we’re on a first name basis now!” Regulus had to suppress a grin as James crossed his arms, but gave in.
“Fine, James. Where to?” James clearly had not been expecting that, because a blush crept up his neck. He stood there, staring like an idiot, mouth slightly parted. Regulus cleared his throat. “James?” The taller boy’s eyes seemed to come back into focus.
“What? Oh! Right! Sorry, follow me then.” James grabbed Regulus’s hand, his hand! Regulus was glad James was navigating through the halls, because the younger boy was very red. James’s hands were covered in thin bumps that Regulus couldn’t exactly see in the dark, but they felt like a bunch of paper cuts. His thoughts were interrupted as James turned to face him. “Right- so er, we’re kind of going to need to sneak out of Hogwarts?” Regulus blinked.
“I’m all for getting out of here,” he started and James visibly relaxed, tension leaking out of his shoulders. “But how?”
“Right! Okay this is pretty much the coolest thing ever,” James said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a silvery handkerchief. Regulus frowned and James shook his head, pulling out his wand and tapping the cloth.
“Engorgio” The Grifindor whispered softly and the cloth grew larger until it was fully blanket sized. Regulus nodded slowly, James blinked in confusion. “It’s an invisibility cloak Reg.” He explained.
“It- what?” Regulus asked in amazement, reaching to stroke his hand down the fabric. It was soft and silvery. “What my mother wouldn’t do to get her hands on this.” he whispered, forgetting James was there for a second.
“That’s what Sirius said” James chuckled, but at the mention of his brother Regulus pulled away, stiffening slightly.
“Right, so we’re sneaking out with this then?” He asked, the older boy nodded, seemingly offended by him pulling away.
“Yeah, get under it then.” James pulled the cloak over both of them, it dragged behind Regulus as they walked, speaking in hushed whispers.
“So can you tell me where we’re going then?” Regulus whispered. James shook his head.
“It’s a surprise!”
“I hate surprises,” he complained.
“Well then, sorry for taking you out on a date then,” James teased, turning towards a portrait. He slipped out from under the cloak and pushed the painting back. Behind it, there was a huge hole, or rather a tunnel. Regulus gawked for what felt like the fiftieth time that night. “Er, I would say ‘Ladies first’ but you’re not a female so…” The older boy trailed off, thinking for a moment. “Okay then, small malnourished emo Slytherins who decided it was a good idea to meet up with Peter Pettigrew for chess and then make out with me’s first.” James smirked at him and Regulus stuck his hand out from under the cloak to flip him the bird.
“Fuck you James” He grumbled, but climbed through the portrait hole. James eventually took the cloak back, and they walked through the tunnel. It started going slightly uphill until they reached what was inevitably the end. The tunnel narrowed at the end, about up to James's waist. On the roof there was a pale wood oak door, with a black brass handle. James dropped to the ground, kneeling as he unlocked the trapdoor. The unmistakable smell of sweets filled the air.
“Honey Dukes?” Regulus asked in a whisper. James nodded, grinning.
“Yeah! Figured we could get some sweets, and then we could just look around, I dunno”
“James,” Regulus blinked at him, “There’s no one working here! How are we gonna buy sweets!” He pointed out, like it was the most obvious thing ever. James let out a sharp bark of laughter, shaking his head quickly.
“It’s fine, the Marauders and I do this a lot. Just the Honey Dukes part though.”
“So, we’re stealing? Really Potter?” He raised an eyebrow, slightly annoyed, mostly amused. James shook his head instantly.
“Oh hell no!” He exclaimed, properly offended at the thought. “It’s more that we leave galleons on the counter, a bit more than what we would have actually paid for the sweets if we came during the day. You know, for the inconvenience?” Regulus narrowed his eyes at the older boy, and then laughed, it was short and sharp, but a laugh none the less.
“You’re mental James,” He muttered, climbing through the trap door and into Honey Dukes. James barked a laugh and climbed up after him.
The shop smelled strongly of sweets, the shelves were packed with candies from all over the world. Assumably with the starting of the school year, all stores had restocked for the students. He walked over to the fizzing whizbees, he had loved them as a kid. Uncle Alphred had snuck him and Sirius some at a family gathering once, Regulus had loved flying around with them in his room, until he had knocked into the ceiling. Needless to say his mother was less than pleased, confiscating them all. Regulus hadn’t had once since. He stuck out a pale hand, grabbing a few packs and pocketing them nervously.
He didn’t exactly know why he was nervous about it, but his chest felt tight. James was looking at lollipops, picking out the spicier ones. Regulus cringed, knowing his own lower spice tolerance. He had a refined palette, being a pureblood and all. James turned back to him, grinning, his eyes crinkled at the corners, and the Slytherin boy’s knees were about to buckle. He couldn’t remember the last time he had seen such genuine pure joy before. It made his heart ache. He decided that he never wanted to see James sad, ever again.
“So what did you get?” The older boy asked, still smiling as he made his way over. He fumbled in his pockets, pulling out the fizzing whizbees. James laughed, grinning like a madman. “Amazing choice Reg”
“I know” a hint of a smile tugged at his own lips. James bopped his nose with a lollipop, Regulus blinked, then let out a short giggle. “The hell was that?”
“I couldn’t resist, you’re adorable.” The other boy teased, walking up to the counter and placing down a good amount of galleons. “That should cover it, yeah?” The question was more asked to himself than to Regulus, but he nodded anyway.
The two boys wandered around Hodgsmeade, not going into any more shops. James smiled at him, and then slowly but surely slipped his hand into Regulus’s. Regulus thought his heart might blow up on the spot, his first instinct was to pull away. Regulus inhaled sharply, looking at James with widened eyes. It was pitch black out by now, the light from his own wand was hitting James’s face in a mesmerizing fashion. Regulus stared, wanting to imprint every detail of the Gryffindor boy’s face forever, from the way his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, or the way there was a slight gap in his teeth, or his eyes. Oh how Regulus could get lost in those forever.
He heard a snap from behind him, and came back to some sense of reality. He drew away with a sharp breath, his hand feeling cold and missing the presence of James’s. The hurt in the other boy’s eyes was like a swift punch to the gut. Regulus was about to apologize, say anything that could redeem this moment, when he heard a sharp meow from behind them. He whipped his head around, and there stood a cat.
She was a scrawny thing, with a black pelt and white stomach like a tuxedo. Her paws were white, stained with mud and dried blood. Regulus was overjoyed. He loved cats, they made him want to flap his hands and squeal. Of course he did not in fact do this because James was watching him with a wounded expression still. The Slytherin boy crouched down, extending a shaky hand. The cat cocked her head slowly, padding across the gravel slowly. She hesitantly moved under his pale bony hands.
“S’that a cat?” James asked softly. Regulus had forgotten he was there, then felt a pang of guilt shoot through him. God, he was on a date for Salazar’s sake,and he was preoccupied with a stray cat.
“Er- yeah” He mumbled, scratching behind the cat’s ear softly, she let out a low purr. Regulus felt a gentle hand on his shoulder, he turned to look up. James was smiling down at him, all earlier hurt had seemingly dissipated. They sat down on a bench, the cat following Regulus like the stray kitten it was. It curled up in his lap, the shorter boy wanted to squeal, but again, did not do anything of the sort. James was staring at him,mouth in a lazy grin. Regulus smiled at him softly, the night comfortably silent. The taller boy’s hand went to Regulus’s face, warm thumb brushing against his sharp cheekbones. He let out a soft breath, heart pounding in his ears.
The dark haired boy pressed his lips against Regulus’s, it was soft, tender. He pulled away, still smiling. Regulus’s heart still pounded in his ears, he was glad James had spoken up because every possible response would have died in his throat.
“You’re absolutely gorgeous,” He whispered, Regulus seemed to regain his nerve.
“I know,” He murmured, James snorted, wrapping an arm around Regulus’s waist, pulling him over so now Regulus was lying across the bench, head on the other boy’s right thigh. The cat made a low sound of protest, but she only adjusted herself on the slytherin boy’s lap. He felt James’s hands tuck his own curly black hair behind his ear, a lazy smile taking over his lips. As James whispered sweet nothings, Regulus felt full again. He could almost forget about the mark, and his family, and everything as they sat together on this cool Autumn night.

Chapter Text

JAMES-
James’s heart pounded in his chest as Regulus curled up in his lap. He inhaled the sweet autumn air as it filled his lungs softly. Fuck Regulus was a god amongst men.

“What should we name her?” James asked softly, Regulus made a small noise of confusion, “The cat?” Regulus’s eyes lit up, studying the scrawny cat with a grin. James thought it was rather cute, the cat and Regulus obviously. The cat was scrawny, pelt spotted and paws bloody, from catching prey James assumed.

“Rhea” regulus whispered, James studied him softly, having little to no recollection of who that was.

“Er- who?”

Regulus looked at him offended, sitting up much to James’s disappointment.

“Rhea? Like the fucking goddess!” Regulus exclaimed, James returned the frustration with a blank stare. “You uncultured swine!” The Slytherin boy scoffed. “She’s the fucking queen of the greek gods! She’s married to Zeus for Salazar’s sake!”

“Sorry love, no idea.” James tried not to squeal at how Regulus had to do a double take when he called him ‘love’. His mouth hung agape slightly, not in a gawk, Regulus Black didn’t gawk. A warm flush spread across the pale boy’s face, bringing his usually gaunt skin to life.

“Pardon?” He finally whispered.

“I have no idea who Rhea is,” James said with a shrug, watching Reggie deflate slightly.

“Right, anyways,” Regulus laid back down across the Griffendor’s lap with a huff, going on to rant about Greek mythology and what not. James stared at him, sucking in another breath. Holy. Fuck. His hair fell over his face, frail hands moving around animatedly as he talked. James tilted his head, so he was looking directly down at Regulus, staring at his eyes. Regulus met his eyes with a soft exhale. James pressed his lips against the younger boy’s, which still had the same thrill as it did the first time. Regulus sat up, the cat stalking off to the side of the bench with the closest thing to a pout that a cat could get to, bringing his hand to James’s hair. James placed his hand on the curve of the dark haired boy’s waist. God his waist.

James didn’t exactly notice the fact he was pushing Regulus off the bench until Regulus abruptly pulled away. At first, he thought he had done something wrong, maybe he had overstepped. But then James saw Regulus land on his ass, then laugh, a sound like a melody throughout the air. It occurred to James that he had never heard Regulus really laugh, sure he had heard him chuckle, or snort indignantly, but never laugh out of pure joy. James decided then and there that he could not go a day without hearing it ever again.

He hopped off the bench, lying next to Regulus and joining in on the infectious laughter ringing throughout Hogsmeade. Rhea padded over, curling up in between the boys this time. James started to reach for the other boy’s hand but stopped, remembering how quickly he had pulled away earlier. Regulus seemed to sense his apprehension, turning to face him, then slid their hands together. James inhaled, the touch sending a shock through his as he smiled.

“I- god Reg” He breathed out, Regulus just smiled, seemingly understanding.

“Right back at you Jamie,” He whispered. James’s heart did multiple summersaults at once feeling his own ears heat up.

“Come again?” James whispered and Regulus snickered, putting his hand up in a pause gesture.

“Sorry- I hang around Barty too much, my god” James barked out a laugh, rolling his eyes.

“You lot are crazy, terrors of the bloody school”

“Us?” Regulus laughed, rolling his eyes, “Barty gets all clingy and sad if Evan isn't with him constantly, so scary” James stared at him, he had never thought much about Regulus’s friends, Barty seemed like a mental, kill on impulse kind of guy, not sappy or clingy.

“Damn, never thought about him that way” James whispered.

“We’re not monsters you know,” Regulus mumbled, matching the other boy’s tone.

“I know!” James said quickly, “god I know, you- you're majestic fucking gorgeous” Regulsu cut him off with a soft kiss.

“Thanks Jamie,” the Slytherin boy whispered.

“Call me that again,” James mumbled, his voice soft, coming from low in his throat.

“What?” Regulus smirked, clearly toying with him. The Gryffindor boy rolled his eyes.

“I hate you,” He grumbled, squeezing Regulus’s hand.

“You love me,” The pale boy teased, James’s heart skipped a beat as he pressed his lips to the other boy’s temple.

“Yeah,” he whispered, James’s heart ached, god he loved him.

“You love sick fool,” Regulus mumbled, running his hand down the back of the cat. There was something on his mind, but James didn’t want to press. He was scared to ruin whatever beautiful moment he had created.
The sun started to rise, warm light painting the land in a soft glow, lighting up Regulus’s face. The cat stood up, nudging the younger black haired in the side. He let out a soft sigh.

“We should go, Panda and Barty are probably worried about me, Ev shouldn't have to deal with that.” Regulus said, standing up.

“Yeah okay,” James couldn’t help the disappointment creeping into his voice as he realized their date was slowly coming to an end. They walked hand in hand through the quiet village, for it was a Sunday now, and no one would be up in the early hours. The cat followed happily, occasionally pouncing on air, making Regulus laugh. James’s own heart soared at the sound.

“Has anyone ever told you that you have a beautiful laugh?” The tall boy asked softly, the younger boy shook his head with a chuckle.

“I don’t laugh often”

“That,” James frowned, “It's truly tragic, I’m afraid I must make you laugh daily now” James declared, earning an eyeroll.

“Not even Barty manages that,” The Slytherin boy pointed out with a glare, but James didn’t miss the smirk tugging at his lips.

“Well, I’ll be the first then!” He said confidently.

“We’ll see,” Regulus chuckled with a sad sigh James didn’t quite understand.

“You okay love?” The taller boy asked softly. Regulus’s eyes darkened, looking as if he was about to snap. The shorter boy exhaled, the tension in his shoulder leaving.

“I’m fine, a bit tired.” He mumbled, opening the door to Honeydukes for James. “Golden boy people pleasers who are obnoxiously affectionate’s first.” Regulus grinned, ushering James inside with a soft smirk. They walked through the tunnel, Rhea still amazingly right behind them.

“What are you gonna do with her?” James asked with a slight smile, the other boy’s eyes lighting up, hands moving animatedly. James wished it was brighter, the dim light of his want not illuminating his love’s full features. They reached the end of the tunnel, James finally coming to terms with the fact that he might never have another date this magical ever again.

“Kiss goodbye?” Regulus asked, staring into his eyes.

James obliged gladly, pressing his lips into the younger boy’s greedily. Regulus grabbed his shirt, pressing him up against the wall. James’s brain was overwhelming, the only clear signal going through was yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Oh great Godric yes.

The Slytherin boy’s hand moved to the back of his neck as James grabbed his waist. The older boy fumbled with Regulus’s uniform buttons, the boy’s shoulders tensed, grabbing James’s wrist and moving it to his own list. James got the message, gripping his waist as they kissed. James forgot about breathing, solely focusing on the anxious feeling in his stomach that occurred at the thought of Regulus leaving. Would he regret this? Would he regret James? What if Reg never talked to him again. James didn’t think he could live with that.
Regulus eventually broke the kiss, James didn’t let him pull away yet.

“James,” the paler boy panted, still regaining his breath,"I should get going” his tone was a whisper, the taller boy felt the anxiety climbing in his throat.

“Please stay,” he whispered desperately.

“Jamie,” Regulus said softly, cupping his cold hand up to James’s cheek, “What’s wrong?”

“Promise me you won’t leave?” He asked softly, heart still skipping a beat at the nickname, “Or regret this?” James made a vague hand gesture, letting go of the younger boy’s waist with one hand.

“Never,” Regulus said instantly, kissing his jaw, “But I should be going, before Barty and Ev get suspicious,” He let go of James and took his hands, examining the small cuts from the snitch.

“Okay,” The Gryffindor boy heard his own voice whisper softly. The black haired younger boy dropped his hands.

“See you later?” Regulus offered, and the anxiety in James’s stomach dissipated.

“Yeah,” he couldn't help it, a grin spreading across his face. The shorted boy chuckled, climbing through the portrait hole, Rhea following close behind, and giving him a mock salute.

“Until next time Jamie,”’ and then he disappeared. Leaving James alone.
He sighed, Regulus was right, he was a love sick fool. He yawned the drowsiness finally hitting him in a wave. Standing up, he heard a cough from the portrait hole. His head snapped up, a slight whiff of cigarettes wafted towards him.

“Moony?” James mumbled drowsily, earning a chuckle from his friend.

“Yep, you have a nice date?” Remus asked, crouching down next to him and helping him
up.

“It was fucking magical Lupin, god why is he so hot!” James whined, leaning on the much taller boy for support, the drowsiness making it hard to think straight. Remus just
laughed softly, James felt his own lips form into a pout. “He is! God Remus, even Sirius isn’t this sexy!”

“I beg your fucking pardon?” Remus laughed, “Sirius Black is the sexiest man on earth thank you very fucking much.” The black haired boy rolled his eyes in response.

“You didn’t fucking see him tonight!” James protested, “He laughed, I wanna make him laugh forever and ever.” James mumbled, tripping over a step as they climbed up the stairs to Gryffindor tower.

Remus dragged him to his bed, tucking him in like a small child. James had done this with all the Marauders before, so it wasn’t something that would embarrass him.
Remus chuckled, “God you have it bad.”

“Fuck,” James whined dramatically, “I know, I think I love him Moony, oh my god.” His arms flopped dramatically. The last thing he heard was Remus laughing, until he passed out from exhaustion.

Chapter Text

BARTY- (I promised homie a Barty ch eheh)
(earlier)
Barty lay across Evan’s lap, feeling the blonde boy run a hand through his tangled hair. Barty wasn’t great at taking care of the mop on his head, leaving Evan to sort through it later.

“Ow-” Barty winced as he hit a snag, “Rosie, save that for the bedroom” He teased. Evan stared, grinning at the younger boy.

“Shut up, you like it when I’m rough Bat,” Evan whispered in his ear, warm breath sending chills down Barty’s spine. God dayum. Barty turned up and kissed him, and things quickly escalated. Still attached to Evan’s intoxicating lips, Barty made his way over to the bedroom, hearing Regulus shout something. Barty just flipped him the bird, already running his hands under Evan’s shirt to take it off. God he was magical. Barty stared at his bare torso, feeling odd butterflies in his stomach. Evan was beautiful, and he was all Barty’s.

“Something up Bat?” Evan grinned, shoving him onto the soft cushions of the bed. Barty inhaled sharply.

“No Rosie,” Barty whispered, running his hand softly up Evan’s arms. They weren’t ‘muscular’ per se, but they had definition to them. “You’re stunning,” he breathed out.

After the sex, came something Barty would never get used to. Staying. Before they had gotten together, Barty had never stayed after their sexual affairs. He had gotten up and left, trying to convince Evan and himself that he was in fact straight as much as it broke his heart. Now he got to snuggle up in Evan’s arm as they chatted quietly, the older boy pressing his lips into Barty’s hair.
“Imagine if my father could see me now,” Barty mused quietly, Evan snorted.

“We would give him a heart attack.”

“Good, then I might finally be free of his ass,” Barty smiled wryly, feeling Evan’s soft hand running down his bare shoulders. The boys had put their pants back on after this afternoon’s events, now both just shirtless. Evan’s dark chocolate skin was a stark contrast to Barty’s pale arms. Barty would have made a ‘yin and yang’ joke if he wasn’t afraid of breaking the moment. He wished he could stay in Evan’s strong arms forever, never facing his father, or people ever again. God he would go days without food if they could stay just like this.

Barty had explained these feelings to Regulus, who scoffed and called it an ‘unhealthy obsession’, but the boy didn’t care. His heart beat for Evan, and he couldn’t live without him. And besides, Regulus was probably out sucking dick as they spoke. Barty let out a low sigh, staring at the wall. Evan was being weird, eyes trailing to the Dark Marks both their wrists bore. The older boy had been opposed to the idea of Barty joining. It had been their biggest fight.

It started off small, they hooked up less, whenever they had sex there was a silent anger behind it. Like Evan had felt betrayed. Eventually Barty had brought it up, ever so delicately he might add. It went like this,

“Ev,” Barty chuckled, pulling up his pants and fumbling with his belt buckle, “That was great, but you could’ve given me more head.” Barty was joking of course, but the older boy tensed beside him, fully clothed.

“I can’t keep doing this Barty,” He whispered, staring at the mark that had recently tainted his perfect cocoa skin. Barty’s heart stopped, he turned to the blonde boy, mouth dry.

“What?” Barty snapped, tone clipped, “Don’t feel like sucking my dick anymore? You too good for me Rosier?” the words came out in a hiss, making Evan flinch. Barty felt a cruel twist in his gut as he met his friend’s dark eyes.

“I didn’t say that,” Evan shot back, tone still quiet. Barty rolled his eyes, letting out a bit of a scoff.

“Oh then what did you mean, oh high and mighty Evan Rosier?” Barty shouted, voice escalating quickly.

“Oh fuck you!” Evan shouted back, matching his bitter tone.

“The hell did I do?!”

“Oh don’t act like you don’t fucking know!” Evan shouted, neck veins bulging in anger.

“What did I do!” Barty's voice cracked in betrayal, he cursed under his breath as Evan stepped towards him.

“You could do so much better,” Evan whispered, eyes shining with tears, “Damn it, you could get married Barty, you- you could work in the ministry, or do whatever the fuck you want!” Evan exclaimed, Barty could barely hear him over the pounding in his ears. “Why the fuck would you want to throw it all away for nothing?” The blonde boy’s voice had escalated back to a shout.

“For nothing?!” Barty shouted, “You, and Reg, you’re both going to be a part of it, maybe even Dora too! All I know is that when we graduate I’m gonna fucking be alone, while you lot have fun together?!” Something in Evan’s face snapped at this, the room feeling cold.

“Fun?,” The older boy’s voice was borderline screaming now as he took a few more steps towards Barty, “You think I want to be a part of this fucking death cult!” Evan let out a stream of curses in French that Barty didn’t understand. “Damn it Barty,” The shorter boy slammed his hand into the wall, making the other flinch.

“What do you care?” The black haired boy spat at his friend, “You don’t fucking care about me.”

“What?” Evan let out a laugh, sounding maniacal as he ran a hand through his braided blonde hair. “Barty! Barty, I'm doing this because I care! Maybe if I push you away, you’ll choose a better fucking option!”

“Bullshit” The younger boy shot back, desperate to keep fighting. Damn it he did have a point though. Evan was miffed, knuckles white as he clenched them at his sides.

Barty met his eyes and realized the boy’s frame was trembling. Whether from anger or anxiety, Barty wasn’t sure. Evan looked like he was about to cry, or hex the younger boy into tomorrow, he stormed out, slamming the door behind him. Barty sat on the bed, staring blankly at the wall.

Evan hadn’t talked to him normally until after Holiday break that winter. After Barty had gotten the mark. After he had run away from his father the day after. Barty had never noticed how much he missed Evan’s presence, it was like drugs, and Barty was addicted. He didn’t know it was love at the time, but damn he was down bad. Inevitably he had to talk to Evan, and cornered him in the bathrooms one Wednesday afternoon.

“Ev-” He was cut off, Evan’s hands shoving him against the wall and lips pressed against his in an angry kiss.

His skin was ablaze with rage and unspoken tension between the two teens. But none of that mattered now, because Barty was high on the taste of his friend’s lips. The black haired boy’s legs went around Evan’s waist, still against the wall. The blonde boy pulled away panting.

“I hate you, I fucking hate you so much,” Evan spat before pressing his lips against Barty’s once more. They broke once more for air.

“Love you too Rosie,” Barty teased, suddenly feeling cocky as Evan pulled off his shirt, going back for Barty’s lips.

“You fucking joined them-” Evan panted, angrily grabbing Barty’s waist.

“I can’t go back-” The younger boy gasped for air, grinning.

“I fucking know,” Evan snapped, sighing as he went in to kiss Barty’s jaw.

“God I missed you Ev,” Barty whispered, making Evan pause.

“That’s kind of gay Bat,” Evan turned to him with a smirk, and maybe they would be okay, for now at least.

Back to the present, Barty frowned at Evan.

“You okay love?” He asked softly, his boyfriend flinched.

“I- shit I didn’t think it would get this serious Bat,” He breathed, voice shaking with unshed tears. Barty’s heart broke and he pulled Evan into his lap. “I don’t want to kill anyone, Bat.”

“I know Rosie, it’ll be okay,” Barty rubbed his back, and they fell into comfortable silence.
Regulus barged in an hour later, the sun rising, making the two lovers flinch.

“Reg?” Barty asked groggily, Regulus turned to them.

“Didn’t mean to wak-”

“I don’t care about that!” Barty exclaimed, fully awake and sitting up, much to Evan’s sleepy disdain. “There the fuck have you been!”

“Out,” Regulus shrugged, Barty’s jaw dropped at his expression. Regulus was down bad.

“With who!” Barty asked eagerly, a grin spreading across his features.

“No one,” Regulus said quickly, shoulders tensing.

“Bullshit!” Barty said excitedly, standing up while ignoring Evan’s soft mumble of protest. “Tell me everything! I must know! Is he hot? Ooooh! Wait, was it a date?!” Barty didn’t realize he was pissing Regulus off until he shoved him back.

“I said fuck off!” Regulus snapped, shutting Barty up effectively. “God, have you ever just shut up?!” He snapped, and stormed out. Barty’s face fell, he turned to Evan.

“I- shit,” He whispered, going over to curl up in his boyfriend’s arms. “Ev- He- is he okay?”

“Yeah, probably,” Evan whispered, trailing off and hugging him tighter. “Just give him some space, ‘k Bat?”

Barty nodded, swallowing the hot ball of emotions threatening to spew from his mouth.

Chapter Text

REG- The next week was a blur of hookups, gentle kisses and late night whispers. James would grab him between classes, on breaks, wherever they could. He had an uncanny ability to know where Regulus was at all times, it was kind of scary. So inevitably, between potions and Quidditch, he found himself pulled into an empty classroom and against the lips of James Potter. The kiss was intense and hungry, relishing in the few seconds they had together. “James-” Regulus panted, pulling away reluctantly from the much taller boy’s lips. James frowned, pouting slightly.

“Jamie, I need to get to practice.” The younger boy pulled away slightly, only to be wrapped in James’s arms once more. “Stay, please.” he begged, eyes full of silent pleading. “Jamie,” Regulus whispered back, “I have to go, we can meet up in the tower though, yeah?” James’s eyes lit up, making his own heart jump.

“Okay, I’ll be there.” James whispered, hugging Regulus once more and letting him go.

Regulus headed to the pitch, feeling cold and empty without James’s presence. God, he was so far gone. Practice went by in a flash, Regulus was more than distracted as his cold hands wrapped around the broom handle. Regulus jolted away the dirty thoughts about James and took to the sky. Barty was still pissed, barely saying anything to him. Regulus felt a twinge of guilt in his stomach, what the shorter boy had said to his friend was horribly unfair. Regulus knew this of course, but Barty was fucking infuriating.

“Tell me everything! I must know! Is he hot? Ooooh! Wait, was it a date?!” Barty had exclaimed, looking like a puppy dog. Regulus was tired, pissed and overwhelmed, and trying to grapple with his growing affection towards James Potter. So yeah, he had snapped. He had been a right and proper dick and had hit Barty where he knew it would hurt. He was no better than his parents.

Regulus tried to approach the taller boy after practice.

“Hey, Barty?” He hated the way his voice got small, the way the air seemed to form a cling wrap around the two boys, Barty letting out a low exhale.

“The fuck do you want Reg?” He hissed, Regulus resisted the urge to flinch back. “Don’t I ‘talk too much’?”

“I apologize for snapping,” Regulus said, keeping his tone level and cold.

“Mm? Do you now?” Barty asked, rolling his eyes. “Where were you then?”

“I-” Regulus faltered, “I can’t tell you that”

“Mm? Well when you do tell me who’s dick you secretly sucked, I’ll talk,” Barty shoved past him, hurt clouding his eyes as he stormed out.

Regulus sank to the floor.

“Shit shit shit,” he whispered, wiping his eyes which were blurry with tears. He felt a hand constricting his chest as he hit his head with his wrists, cursing softly. God he was pathetic, breaking down over a secret gay relationship. He hit his head against the tile, hearing a crack and pain spreading through his skull. He laughed, breath still coming out in ragged gasps. His sleeve rolled down, the mark burning into his skin. Regulus lay on the cold tile floor, laughing as tears poured down his cheeks and he grinned. “God I’m such a mess,” His broken laugh echoed off the walls. His mother’s voice echoed in his mind once more.

BOYS DON’T CRY REGULUS BLACK

UNMANLY

DISGRACE

FAG

GROSS

FUCK UP

Regulus laid on the floor and cried for the next hour, slipping in and out of consciousness from his head injuries. Eventually when he woke up, the sun had started to set. He stood up quickly and immediately fell into a locker, vision blacking out for a moment before he could stumble out the doorway. He made his way to the astronomy tower, where James was already sitting, seeming tense. He whipped his head up and grinned.

“Reg!” The taller boy shot to his feet, embracing Regulus in a tight hug.

“Hey Jamie,” Regulus whispered back, “Sorry I’m late”

“It’s okay love,” James pressed a kiss to Regulus’s temple and all panic from earlier dissipated. The two boys sat down on the stone floor, staring at the stars as they did most nights. James was talking his ear off about how Peter had fucked up in tranfiguration, transforming his quill into a peacock that then terrorized the whole classroom. Regulus loved listening to James rant, the way his eyes got so animated while he described the Peacock pecking at Snape’s greasy hair. Regulus laughed along to the story, lying his head on James’s shoulder. Eventually the older boy grew quiet, picking at the slits on his hands nervously as he chewed on his lip. Regulus carefully took his hands, rubbing his thumb along the back.

“Jamie what’s wrong?” Regulus whispered, meeting James’s eyes.

“I- whatarewe?” James asked, words tumbling out in a disorganized fashion.

“What do you mean?”

“Likeareweboyfriends?” James breathed out after five minutes of silence.

Regulus blinked, because somehow this had never occurred to the younger boy. What were they? They surely were past the point of friends, and they couldn’t go back to hating each other. Regulus exhaled, shrugging helplessly. There was also the whole element of Regulus’s mother to factor in. James was staring at the floor like it held the secrets to the universe.

“I dunno….” Regulus trailed off with a sigh, “Do you wanna be?” the younger boy asked finally. James nodded instantly, but then bit his lip, going back to staring at the floor. Regulus chuckled and grabbed the taller boy’s chin gently.

“Well then, me too,” Regulus pressed his lips against his boyfriend’s. He had a fucking boyfriend! The thought made him giddy as the kiss went on, James’s hand finding his black hair.

After the…. Celebration so to speak, Regulus watched James pull his pants back up. Miraculously the younger boy had been able to cover up the mark and stay mostly clothed. He was still giddy with the revelation of having a boyfriend, sweeping any thoughts of his new sexuality under the rug for now. Who needed to know what they were attracted to? Regulus was dating James Fleamont fucking Potter!

“Hey Jamie?” Regulus whispered softly.

“Yeah love?” His lover looked up, still wearing a goofy grin.

“Am I allowed to er- to tell people about us? Just my friends of course because god forbid my mother finds out!” Regulus felt sick at the thought. James nodded quickly.

“Of course love! I won’t tell anyone without your permission okay?” James said softly, Regulus nodded.

“Okay, Remus is okay to tell- Just not Sirius, not yet at least.” James nodded, tensing.

“Yeah, not Sirius, not yet.” He whispered in agreement.

Eventually he retreated to his dorm, going to bed and kicking his feet. Evan looked up from where he had been stroking a sleeping Barty’s green hair.

“Where have you been?” He asked, amusement written all over his face.

“With James,” Regulus sighed dreamily, a grin spread across the blonde boy’s face.

“Oh my god! You’re fucking James potter!” Evan exclaimed, alert with excitement but keeping his voice low as to not to wake Barty.

“Shh!” Regulus hissed angrily, “I’m planning to tell everyone tomorrow!” He exclaimed. Evan laughed quietly.

“Yeah yeah okay,” Evan put his hands up in surrender, grinning still. Regulus rolled his eyes and went to sleep.

The next morning, Regulus awoke to Barty standing over him with wide eyes. Regulus blinked and then let out a noise of surprise, scrambling back and attempting to punch Barty in the jaw. The punch landed weakly, making Barty chuckle and rub his jaw.

“Shit- Fuck! Barty what the hell!” Regulus shouted.

“What the hell is right! You’re fucking James Potter?” His friend exclaimed, ivory arms flailing dramatically. Regulus’s head turned sharply to Evan who simply shrugged nonchalantly and smirked.

“If you tell me shit I’m gonna tell Bat, and then Bat’s gonna tell Dorcas and Panda,” Evan said simply, and as if on cue Dorcas was banging on the door, Pandora followed closely.

“REGGINALD FUCKING BLACK!” Dorcas shouted, opening the door.

“That’s not even my name!” Regulus complained, but Dorcas was not having it.

“BARTY TELLS ME YOU’VE BEEN FUCKING JAMES BLOODY POTTER?!” She screeched, grinning like a giddy maniac. Dorcas assaulted him with a hug, the rest of the group following in suit.

“Shit! I can’t fuck James if you all suffocate me!” Regulus gasped out, still grinning. His friends let go. Barty still stared at Regulus.

“Sorry for being a dick,” He whispered, Regulus chuckled.

“It’s fine, you going soft on me Crouch?”

“Soft?” Barty scoffed, smiling repossessing his features, “You wish Black. Now to revisit my earlier question….” He trailed off with an evil smirk. “How long is it?” Barty asked, earning a glare from his boyfriend. Regulus rolled his eyes but made a guesstimate size with his hands. Barty whistled, which made Evan hit his shoulder. Barty turned to Evan, who angrily kissed him.

“What did I say about asking about other guys’ dicks?” Evan breathed. Barty chuckled.

“Not to ask about them,” Barty rolled his eyes.

“Exactly.” Evan said. The group dissolved into conversation, and Regulus felt on top of the fucking world. He felt like he could take on Voldemort and win. Pandora sat next to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

“‘M happy for you Reg,” She whispered, and Regulus smiled. “Thanks Panda.” He whispered back.

Chapter Text

SIRIUS-

Sirius awoke with a start, blinking from exhaustion. He huffed a sigh, rubbing his eyes to see Remus, still sleeping and shirtless, lying across his lap peacefully. He ran a hand through his boyfriend’s tangled hair, pressing a kiss to his temple.
“Morning love,” Sirius whispered, shoving away the usual recurring nightmares that plagued his mind. Remus stirred.
“Mmm” He grunted, and Sirius shook his shoulder. “Five more minutes Siri,” Remus grumbled, curling back into Sirius’s lap again. Sirius chuckled but obliged.
“Of course,” he whispered, “Anything for my Moony.”
Eventually Remus crawled out of bed and went to go clean up, leaving Sirius alone with his thoughts. He huffed a sigh, desperately searching for a distraction. So he decided to find the best way to fuck with the dress code.
The black haired boy pushed himself to his feet and went to his drawers, which were stuffed with Remus’s stolen jumpers. Sirius pulled out the one that smelled most like Remus, and tossed it on his bed, which also smelled like his boyfriend. Sirius found comfort in the smell, and kind of panicked when it wasn’t present. James had bought Sirius a T-shirt in sixth year that read, “Live, Laugh, Love Remus Lupin” and Sirius had worn it for a month straight until it disappeared under ‘suspicious circumstances’. Code for, Remus had burned it and didn’t want to hurt James’s feelings. Sirius chuckled at the memory, pulling on the usual uniform shirt and then Remus’s sweater over it. He grinned as the huge sweater went halfway down his calves.
Sirius was so fucking short, and Remus was 6 foot something, which made stealing his clothes very inconvenient for the shorter boy. Sirius pulled on some clean black slacks and wrapped his Gryffindor scarf around his neck. After getting dressed he jumped back onto his bed and brushed though his soft black hair while he waited for Moony, humming a song under his breath. Starman by David Bowie actually. His leg bounced up and down, waiting for Remus.
Finally the boy in question emerged, lower torso wrapped in a towel. Brilliant silver scars adorned his body, usually in pairs of three. The memories were painful for Remus, but Sirius thought his scars made him absolutely fucking majestic. Or at least they looked better than his own, which were harsh and pink still from mother dearest. For some horrible reason, these scars never leveled out, they stayed fresh and sometimes still stung. None of the Marauders had found any way to reverse it, and Sirius didn’t exactly like going to Madame Pomfrey with his familial issues; the poor woman had enough on her hands already with Remus’s lycanthropy and all.
“Finally!” Sirius whined, lying back on the bed dramatically as Remus went to his dresser to change. Once his boyfriend had pulled out his uniform, and one of the jumpers Sirius had yet to steal, he turned to the black haired boy expectantly. Sirius blinked at this, genuinely confused. After a moment of staring Remus through his hands up in exasperation.
“Oh for fuck’s sake! Would you mind, I dunno, turning around!?” The tall boy exclaimed and Sirius snorted.
“Why? Nothing I haven’t seen before,” Sirius said, a flirtatious edge to his tone as his pale lips turned up into a smirk. Remus rolled his eyes.
“You-” He cut himself off and sighed in exhaustion, “Nevermind, I’m too hungry to give a fuck,” the brown haired boy mumbled as he pulled on his clothes and sweater.
The two boys hurried down to breakfast, sitting quickly in their usual spots. Peter was there, but no James.
“Wormtail, where’s Prongs?” Sirius asked, Peter shrugged.
“I’m not supposed to say,” Peter said bluntly, turning back to his food. Anger flared up in Sirius.
“The fuck does that mean?” Sirius asked, tone raising slightly which caused a few Hufflepuffs to look over.
“I- er- he,” Peter stuttered, “He’s just talking to someone” Peter picked at his nails.
“Who?” Sirius growled, Peter looked up in annoyance.
“Maybe he left to get away from your intrusive, ‘what is privacy’ stupid ass,” Peter snapped, shrinking back as the words left his mouth. Sirius barked a laugh.
“You really wanna play that game Pettigrew?” The black haired boy hissed, leaning over the table before feeling a firm hand on his arm.
“Pads you’re getting hair on my toast, sit the fuck down.” Moony grumbled, one thing Sirius had picked up from being an Animangi dog, was shedding. He didn’t shed much usually, but apparently today was not a ‘usual day’. He huffed, sitting back down.
“But Moonyyyy!” Sirius whined, “Peter’s being rude!”
“I am not!” Peter scoffed, and Sirius rolled his eyes. What a lying rat. As if just in time, James walked over, taking a seat next to Peter.
“Sorry I’m late,” He chuckled, hair slightly disheveled. Remus coughed and waved his wand, casting some sort of spell. James relaxed, and flashed his friend a thankful grin.
What the fuck was that? Sirius thought in annoyance, because when did James keep secrets from him? They were like brothers, the fuck was this? Remus seemed to notice his boyfriend’s impending sour mood, because he placed his head on Sirius’s shoulder, brown curls softly brushing against the pale boy’s neck. Maybe it would be all right, what was one secret? Remus’s smell was just that intoxicating.
Classes went on like normal, Sirius paid enough attention to get good grades, but also fell asleep during astronomy, herbology, potions, basically anything but transfiguration. He wasn’t even tired, just needed to pass the time well enough, so he might as well spend it sleeping. During lunch they pulled a prank on Snape, turning his hair pink with muggle hair dye. Sirius had re-bleached the tips of his black hair, liking the way it looked. He had been doing it since third year, the first time he went to James’s house. The two had been walking around a muggle village when they saw people with, well with blech blonde hair. Sirius looked at the ends of his hair and made an impulsive decision. His mother had lost her shit over it, but in the end it was totally worth it. Remus had stared for a whole minute when they had returned to Hogwarts.
Then came the most shocking twist of the day, Sirius had unrolled the map after classes like any normal person would do when they had something that could track everyone in the school. Sirius blinked as he had seen two names in the same hall way, right fucking next to eachother.
James F Potter, and Regulus A Black
Sirius was unsure whether he should be angry or betrayed. The emotion accumulating in his chest was a mix of both. He stood up and walked over there. Did he think it through at all?
No.
Was he gonna go and confront the two?
Yes.

What was Regulus even doing with James? Was he torturing him? Was he bullying him?
Oh god, Sirius’s stomach twisted at the thought of James being hurt. Eventually Sirius had run to the hallway, to find the two- wait what?
Were Regulus and James….talking?
No. Sirius must be hallucinating, he had caught some horrible disease and this was all a fever dream. Yes that was it, there was no way on this earth that Regulus was laughing at something James had said. Sirius stood there in plain sight, like a bumbling idiot of course. Regulus’s head snapped around and he jumped back from James as if he was on fire. James seemed confused until he followed the shorter boy’s gaze. The two’s expressions might have been comical if Sirius wasn’t fucking fuming.
“What. The. Fuck. James,” Sirius breathed out, not even acknowledging Regulus in the corner.
“I- what- I can explain-” James stuttered, but Sirius cut him off.
“Oh can you now?” Sirius spat back, “My best friend! Betrayed me! By talking to my traitorous little brother!” He could have sworn he saw Regulus flinch a little. The thought filled him with a twisted sense of justice. For some reason, James relaxed, then got angrier.
“Oh my fucking god!” James exclaimed, letting out an incredulous laugh. “You’re pissed, I’m friends with Regulus?”
“Yeah! Why else would I be pissed?!” Sirius exclaimed, not liking how there seemed to be some sort of underlying secret here.
“Oh my fucking god!” James repeated, “I- you- what the fuck!”
“And you!” Sirius spun towards Regulus, seeing as the conversation with James was getting nowhere. The younger boy looked at him with a hard defiant gaze, lifting his chin. “I thought you were better than this, manipulating my best friend-!”
“Manipulating!” Regulus scoffed, half laughing and deeply offended. “If I were to manipulate your friend he would be on the ground sucking my dick,” Regulus spat, “I’m not forcing him to be here Sirius.” The older Black brother shuddered at the mental image of James sucking Regulus’s dick. Ew.
“Actually shut the fuck up” Sirius shuddered, James shot Regulus another secretive look. Sirius hated that. How dare his best friend have secret looks with his fucking brother??!! “No talk of dick sucking, why don’t you go slither off to your little death eater friends?” Sirius hissed angrily, words landing like icy venom. His little brother’s expression twitched and the older boy fought back a smirk. He didn’t like hurting Reg, he felt like he was gonna puke, but it was satisfying in some twisted way. The hairs on Sirius’s next stood up, he was turning into his mother. A small voice whispered in the back of his mind.
‘You love to see them hurting, you’re no better than her. Worthless piece of shit’
Sirius shuddered, turning back to Regulus, who had turned to leave. Sirius briefly wondered how long he had spaced out, but James was already turning to yell at him, the youngest Black brother nowhere in sight.
“Pads, what the fuck!” James exclaimed, voice climbing in volume. Sirius glared.
“What?! You are a traitor here! Not me!” Sirius cried.
“Traitor!? God forbid I make friends!” James threw his hands up, like somehow the shorter boy was being the crass one, not him.
“You’re avoiding the issue here! You- You-!” Sirius was red in his pale face. James huffed a groan, looking like he was about to scream.
“I can’t with you, Padfoot! You’re the one avoiding the issue!” James said, voice low but still angry, “You ever think, that maybe, just maybe! That the reason you’re like this,” James gestured to all of Sirius, “Is because you fucking miss him?!”
Whatever retort Sirius had died in his throat. Did he miss Reg? No, he couldn’t. He had left him though…
Sirius stood in the hallway, a realization dawning on him slowly.
“Shit James.” He choked out, and his best friend’s shoulders relaxed with an exhale. “Shit James, I really do miss him.” Sirius whispered, collapsing into James’s arms with a sob.
After crying his eyes out a bit, the air was clear enough for James to speak up.
“Sirius, maybe,” James hesitated, but sighed, “Maybe I could, I dunno? Get you two talking again?” Sirius’s heart stopped in his chest. Talking to Reg? Like old times? The memory seemed almost foreign. Sirius nodded fiercely.
“Yes, please James. Anything to get my Reggie back”

Chapter Text

JAMES-

James was still bubbling with anger and embarrassment, but he was so fucking relieved that Sirius hadn’t seen them kissing. That would have been a whole other conversation for the history books. His heart was still beating in his chest, threatening to crawl up his throat. He couldn’t deny how pitiful his best friend looked, eyes still rimmed with tears, pleading for his little brother back.

“Okay,” James whispered, pulling back from their hug. Sirius sniffled, wiping his nose with the back of his hand and turning to follow James as they went back to the common room. Remus was there when they got back, pacing back and forth. The tallest boy’s head shot up as they entered, not relaxing at all when he saw Sirius’s state.

“What the fuck happened?”Remus asked, Sirius didn’t answer, and James didn’t want to. Remus exhaled in exasperation, “I asked what the fuck happened?” his tone was a bit sharper now.

“I-” James exhaled, “Sirius walked in on Regulus and me talking” James emphasized, wishing that Remus would stop giving him a knowing smirk.

“Okay.. then why is Pads crying?” Remus asked, narrowing his eyes at his boyfriend.

“Because he misses his brother,” Remus’s mouth made a little ‘o’ shape at that, and he sat Sirius down on the couch. Sirius’s head slumped into Remus’s shoulder, and his shoulders shook again. James decided to leave the two alone for now, grabbing the Marauder’s Map as he went. He had a family reunion to plan after all.

-SIRIUS-

Sirius didn’t mean to cry, hell he hated the feeling. It made him feel pathetic, crying in James’s, and now Remus’s, arms. But once he started he couldn’t stop, like a dam had been opened. Remus’s hands went through his hair, trying to sooth the smaller boy. Sirius didn’t know what to say, he wasn’t the best at communicating emotions, especially the sad ones. Remus didn’t pressure him to talk though, just kept running his scarred hands through Sirius’s hair. Eventually he calmed down enough to talk.

“Sorry Moony,” Sirius whispered, sitting up to hug his knees. Remus just smiled at him.

“It’s okay love”

“I- I miss him”

“I know you do,” Remus took Sirius’s hands into his own. Sirius’s lower lip trembled, but he refused to bawl again.

“J-james offered to set us up to talk,” The black haired boy choked out. Remus nodded, not seeming surprised.

“Do you want that?” Remus asked slowly, and Sirius nodded quickly

. “Yeah!- Yeah, I do,” Sirius whispered. Remus nodded, pulling Sirius back into his lap softly. Sirius curled up in his lap once more, steady breathing in time with Remus’s.

“So, where did James go?” Remus asked, Sirius shrugged, picking up the map in his hands. He huffed a sigh.

“Talking to Reg,” Sirius mumbled, jealousy swirling in his stomach. Remus snorted, as if he was in on a secret joke.

“What?”

“Nothing,” The curly haired boy shook his head in amusement and Sirius frowned.

“Tell me!!” He whined, tipping his lips down into a pout, only making his boyfriend laugh harder.

“It’s nothing,” Remus’s lips pressed against Sirius’s forehead, and all of his anxieties were momentarily forgotten. They chatted for a good hour, about simple things. Like essays, or pranks, or Remus let Sirius rant about quidditch. The cup was technically in early spring, and he wasn’t even on the team, which he skirted around mentioning; due to the memories the suspension entailed. But that didn’t make him any less excited for it. Eventually James came back, he knocked on the door and Sirius’s head snapped up. He suddenly felt horribly queasy as James’s voice rang throughout the empty commonroom.

“Can we come in?” James asked softly. We? Oh shit. Reg was with James. Sirius was not prepared for this. But he mustered up a reply.

“Yeah,” The black haired boy croaked, and James stepped through the door, Regulus close behind him. Regulus looked nervous and small, Sirius caught his eye. Regulus quickly fixed his posture and looked up in defiance. “Sirius.” He stated. “Regulus.” Sirius stated in return. This was going to be one hell of a reunion.

REGULUS-

(earlier)- Regulus’s breath was coming in short, Sirius’s voice rang through his head. Death eater. Traitor. Slytherin. Each word landed like an arrow to the heart, some monster crawling up his spine and grabbing his lungs with its large paws. His chest was tight, his vision was blurry. He didn’t know where exactly he was, but he sank down to the floor, covering his ears.

“Shit, Shit, Shit-” Regulus gasped out between muffled sobs, too much of a wreck to cast a silencing charm to hide himself. He didn’t know when the sobbing and gasping subsided, his brain still felt tingly, and so did his teeth. He didn’t trust himself to stand, in fear he would black out, and all words stayed stuck in his throat. He would just have to wait for James to find him. Rhea seemed to have found him first, curling up in Regulus’s lap. It was calming in a way, the cat had gained some weight since she had got here, and her fur had grown back soft and thick. Regulus ran his hand through her fur, matching his breathing to the lovely tuxedo cat. And he waited. James never took long to find him.

At first, Regulus didn’t even hear him, he didn’t even register him until he was crouched down in front of the boy. He smiled at Reg softly, noting the cat and deciding to just kiss his boyfriend’s temple instead.

“Hey love,” James whispered, tucking Regulus’s hair behind his ear. Regulus met James’s eyes; his were no doubt red and puffy, but he couldn't muster up the strength to care. Regulus smiled at him, still not up for speaking yet. James noted this and started talking. “Sorry about Sirius,” He whispered, Regulus shook his head quickly, James shouldn’t be sorry for his idiotic brother. James sighed and rolled his eyes, but let the topic go. “We er- we talked, and-” James cut himself off with a frustrated huff. “He misses you.” The words hung in the air, it took Regulus a minute to even process them. Sirius? Missed him? The thought made him want to laugh. James seemed to read his expression and sighed. “I know how it sounds Reg,” the older boy whispered. “He- I don’t know how to present this to you.” James said, his eyes looked like a lost and helpless puppy’s, but Regulus wasn’t one to fold easily. No matter home much he loved James Potter. “He wants to talk” Talk? A talk would surely end in some form of fight right? Or would it help? Regulus didn’t know. One one hand, he fucking missed his older brother, but on the other hand his parents existed. And that was enough to keep any urge at bay. Regulus shook his head, and James ran a hand through his tangled curls anxiously. “I don’t- shit Reg,” His boyfriend whispered, it was clear that this whole ordeal was stressing him out. Regulus sighed, James Potter was his fucking weakness. At best, maybe he would get his brother back, the thought felt foreign in his brain; at worst, he would get to cry in James’s arms when it was all over. Or his parents would find out. That was not going to be fun. He looked into James’s dark pleading eyes and pushed any thoughts of his family away. Except for Sirius, his brother was still promptly on his mind.

“Okay,” He croaked, standing up. “Yeah, let’s go.”

The two boys made their way up the stairs to the common room. When Regulus met his brother’s eyes, he knew it was going to be one hell of a reunion. James and Remus left the room to talk, the air was cold and dead. Sirius was taping his hand on his thigh anxiously.

“Come sit?” Sirius offered, voice oddly small.

“I’ll stand.” Regulus said, purely out of spite. He wasn’t going to make this easy. If his brother really cared, he would have to fight for Regulus. Sirius’s jaw tensed, but he nodded. More awkward and tense silence hung between the two brothers, both not wanting to address the elephant in the room. Much to his surprise, it was Sirius who spoke first.

“How’ve you been?” He asked, immediately wincing about how stupid the question sounded. Regulus deadpanned at him, making his brother back track. “I- I’m sorry- I just- with mum and stuff- I- shit the thought makes me sick!” His brother wasn't kidding, his face turned paler, if that was possible.

“You’re the one who left,” Regulus muttered, making the oldest Black brother drop his gaze.

“I- I wanted to take you with me-”

“Don’t fucking start with that!” Regulus said, “You didn’t even say goodbye!”

“What!?” Sirius blinked at him, “I- yes I did! You said you had to stay, I fucking begged you to-”

“Stop bullshitting me!” Regulus snapped, “You never even stopped by!”

“Reg-”

“Regulus”

“Right- I promise I didn’t leave-” Sirius started, but Regulus was done. Fuck he was so done, tears pooled into his eyes.

“You did, you left, and Dumbledore refused to help because I- I’m not good enough for him?!” Tears started pouring down his pale cheeks. “I’m not good enough for you to stay! I’m not good enough for Dumbledore’s help! I will never be good enough for our parents! And- And I’m scared I’ll never be enough for-!” Regulus cut himself off with a sob, then covered his mouth with his hand to muffle it. His watery eyes found his brother’s, which were rimmed with tears that were threatening to spill.

“I’m so sorry-” Sirius whispered, voice hoarse and catching in his throat. “Regulus-”

“Save it- you never cared,” He snapped, and Sirius visibly flinched back, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

“Reg- do you remember anything about that night?” Sirius asked.

“I-” Regulus dug through his memory, he remembered waking up so distinctly, but the rest of the day was fuzzy. Resembling a dream that you couldn’t remember the details of, but you know for a fact you had.

“Can I try something?” Sirius asked softly.

“Try what?” Regulus couldn’t help the edge to his voice

. “A memory-restoring spell?” Sirius said, bracing himself for Regulus to burst out in anger at the assumptions.

“Shit, I wouldn’t put it past them,” Regulus sighed. “You’re not doing it,” Regulus said, pulling out his wand.

“You’re really not supposed to cast them on yourself-” Sirius started, but Regulus had already muttered the incantation, pointing his wand at his head.

Bam. The world went dark.

Regulus was a few years younger, back at Grimuald place. He was sitting on his bed reading something for summer homework, when he heard a knock at his door.

“Reg?” Sirius whispered, opening the door. Something was wrong, Sirius had a bag on his back and was wearing a coat over his flannel pajama pants.

“No,” Regulus said, shutting his book. “No- No- You’re not leaving me-” The words came out frantic, Sirius quickly shushing him.

“I’m not, you’re coming with me-” Sirius whispered, glancing behind himself anxiously. Regulus felt sick, but complied. Packing up as Sirius instructed after a few more anxious glances. Summer reading, extra clothes, and his wand all went into a worn down knapsack. Sirius nodded quickly, motioning for him to follow as they crept down the stairs.

“Get your coat,” his older brother whispered, and Regulus nodded, tiptoeing to the coat rack. He pulled his coat off, but the stand came with it, emitting a loud CLANG.

“Shit,” Sirius cursed, fumbling with the flue power as the two boys heard their mother’s screeches from above the stairs. Regulus felt something settle in his stomach. Only one of the boys was going to escape tonight, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to let Sirius stay in this hellhole.

“Go.” Regulus hissed, shoving his brother towards the fire.

“No- no- no Reg I’m not going to fucking leave you-”

“I said go!” Regulus shouted, “I hate you, I hate you! Go away! I don’t want you here!” It was lie after lie, but anything to keep Sirius from coming back to save him. Regulus threw the pot of Floo Powder into the fireplace quickly, and whispered James’s address. He then put his hands on Sirius’s chest, and shoved him hard. “Reg!” Sirius sobbed, before being engulfed in flames. That wasn’t the end, his mother grabbed his arm and pulled out her wand. Crucio, Crucio, Crucio, Crucio. It was a vicious cycle of pain and yelling until the early hours. Every part of his body was on fire, but he was good at not crying anymore.

He sat there, hugging his stomach on the floor as tears threatened to pool from his eyes. His mother stood above the boy and pointed her wand once more at him. But the spell she emitted wasn’t Crucio. Regulus didn’t catch it before it all went black again.

He woke up gasping for air, clawing at his throat and drenched in sweat. He was in his dorm, in his bed, and there were four people surrounding his bed. His vision cleared, revealing Barty, Evan, James, and Sirius. Barty looked curious, Evan looked worried, James looked horrified, and Sirius looked like he might be sick from guilt.

“Reg!” James exclaimed, earning a smirk of amusement from the two other Slytherins. Sirius seemed oblivious, apologies tumbling out of his mouth. Regulus raised a hand with a sigh, effectively shutting his brother up.

“Shut up- I- I remember it now.” Regulus mumbled.

“Oh- Are-” Sirius debated what to say for a second before sighing and saying it anyway, “are we good now?”

“Good?” Regulus scoffed, and Sirius dropped his gaze immediately, “we are far from good my dear brother, but maybe we’re healing. Just a bit.”

Sirius smiled at that, and for a moment, they could just be.

Chapter Text

JAMES-

Gryffindor Halloween parties weren’t exactly a new thing, and the Marauders had taken it upon themselves to plan all events. Sirius was surprisingly a thorough and excellent planner, though he blamed it on all the parties his family threw. And since this was their graduating year, they were determined to throw the most epic parties ever. Remus was on music, Sirius was on decorations with Peter, and James was on invitation duty. Currently, it was the night of October 30th; Remus was pacing back and forth, debating whether to put another Bowie song, or put ABBA instead. Sirius was hanging up decorations frantically, yelling at Peter to hand things up faster. And James himself was finishing the invitations up. They had decided to go big, inviting everyone in the school. It was an excuse for James to invite Regulus, if his boyfriend even decided to show. 

James excused himself to go deliver invitations. In truth, he just wanted to try and convince Regulus to go. He laid all the invitations out, except for Regulus’s of course, two tables covered in dark red invitations. They were all sealed with wax, the stamp design was a cute lion wearing bat wings with jack o'lantern in front. Peter had actually been the one to make it, apparently his cousin made stamps for wax seals as a hobby, and had taught Peter over the past summer. Even Sirius had been impressed by the boy’s hidden talent. 

With a flick of James's wand, all but one of the invitations had been delivered. He pocketed the last invitation, and made his way to the dungeons.

When James got there, he nodded to Pandora, who smirked as James walked over to the door of Barty, Evan and Regulus’s shared dorm. He was about to grab the brass handle when Reg grabbed his wrist. James resisted the urge to shiver at the cold touch. The boy’s hands were like ice.

“I would not go in there if I were you,” he muttered, glaring in disgust at the door. 

“Er- Why?” 

“Barty and Evan are two teens with raging hormones,” the younger boy said, shooting another disgusted look at the door. James’s eyebrows shot up.

“Oh! Now?!” He exclaimed.

“No time like the present I guess,” the shorter boy mumbled.

“Okay then, anyways I came to ask you something-” James started, but Regulus cut him off.

“No.” He said firmly, “I will not be attending, Sirius doesn’t want me there.” 

“It was his idea to invite you!” James protested, brows knitting together.

“Bullshit!” 

“I’m starting to think that’s your favorite word,” the older boy grumbled, annoyance seeping into his tone.

“Don’t change the fucking subject James, there’s no way in hell that Sirius, my brother, the one who has hated me-”

“He never fucking hated you!” James cried, “And you two talked last week!” He quieted his tone, “He wants to be better love.”

“I-” Regulus groaned, smacking his forehead with his wrist in annoyance. “You- okay fine. But Barty, Evan, and Pandora are coming.” He said firmly, James’s face erupted into a goofy grin.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” James pulled Regulus onto an excited kiss, and pulled back still grinning. A small smile played on his boyfriend’s lips, and James’s heart soared. 

“Okay okay,” Regulus reached into the taller boy’s pocket and pulled out the invitation, then pressed a kiss to James’s cheek. “I’ll be there Jamie.”

After a bit more conversation James made his way back to his own common room to finish setting up. 

* * *

When the party finally started, people flooded in. The common room was so packed it seemed small, and reeked of weed and alcohol. James was a few drinks in by the time Regulus showed up, and he went over immediately.

“Reg!” He grinned, cheeks flushed. Regulus laughed,

“Oh Jamie you’re drunk!”

“No’m’not!” James protested, pulling Reg into himself as Good Old Fashioned lover Boy started playing. James grabbed one of Regulus’s hands, and put his other around Regulus’s waist. Regulus laughed, and they performed some form of messy waltz.

“Jamie, you’re going to be the death of me,” Regulus laughed, lying his head on James’s chest with a grin. 

“Oh come on, this is our song!” James grinned, twirling Regulus around. He yelped in surprise and stumbled, but James caught him just in time. 

“Like I said, you’ll be the fucking death of me James Potter.”
“Mm, if you die, I’m dying with you,” James whispered, kissing his boyfriend softly. They danced until the song ended, then went to sit on the couch, the two boys were properly drunk now. Reglus’s cheeks were flushed, and he had a goofy grin on his face. James looked around the party. Peter was chatting with some Ravenclaw first year, both not too drunk yet, if drunk at all. Sirius was wasted, standing on the side table and professing his undying love to Remus, who was sprawled across the other couch,the one next to where Sirius was standing, also drunk and high as a kite. Barty and Evan were making out in a corner, Dorcas and Marlene were seeing who could walk in a straight line first, and Pandora was chatting to some Ravenclaw guy. James vaguely knew his name, he was pretty sure it started with an X?

James was about to say something when Sirius made an announcement.

“Alright fuckers! Whoever is playing never have I ever, get your asses to the couches! All Marauders are obliged to play!” Most people didn’t bat an eye, Barty and Evan made their way over, stumbling and falling onto the cushion next to Regulus and James. Sirius sank down next to Remus, and Peter scuttled over.Marlene, Dorcas, Mary, Lily, and Pandora walked over as well. Peter distributed the drinks, being the most sober one there. Peter started.

“Never have I ever kissed Sirius” he said with a smirk. Remus drank instantly, James glared at Peter.

“I feel targeted.” He snorted and drank. Barty also drank, and Sirius turned bright red.

“Second year, at a party, long story.” The lanky boy waved it off with a chuckle. Remus looked like he might resort to murder any minute now. Mary also drank, which made sense because the two had dated. So did Lily.

“Wait when?” James asked, mouth agape.

“Drunk at a Party,” Lily slurred, chuckling. “Do not recommend.”

“Oi! Fuck you Evans,” The eldest Black brother exclaimed. Lily stuck her tongue out at him and collapsed into Mary’s arms.

“Okay then,” Evan thought for a minute with a huff, “Never have I ever had sex with a girl.” Everyone except Regulus drank.

“Never Reggie?” Sirius snorted, “Are you gay or a virgin?” Regulus just rolled his eyes.

“Fuck you, never have I ever hung posters of girl’s tits in my room,” The younger Black brother smirked maliciously, Sirius flipped him off and drank. Everyone laughed. 

The game continued on like this for a while, everyone far beyond simply wasted.A few more kids joined in as well. It was great, until one random Ravenclaw asked the question.

“Never have I ever kissed James,” he slurred, and James and Regulus stopped in their tracks. James took a steady breath, trying not to panic. Sirius drank, Peter did too, so did Remus. Lily did as well. Regulus tried to discreetly drink, bending down to pretend to pick something up, but oh Sirius saw.

“Reggie!” He exclaimed, Regulus flinched, solo cup spilled on the floor after he dropped it. “You kissed James?!”

“I- yes?” Regulus said, sounding like a little like a child caught red handed.  

“When?!” Sirius exclaimed, sitting up angrily.

“Define when? Like the first or the last time?” Regulus slurred.

“It happened more than once!?” Sirius shouted, standing up. 

“Sirius not now-” James started, Sirius turned to him.

“And you! My best friend is snogging my fucking little brother!?” Sirius shouted.

“I- I- You-” James faltered, tears pricking at his eyes as Sirius kept shouting.

“This is betrayal! Both of you!” 

“That’s not fucking fair!” Regulus protested, standing up to face Sirius.

“Oh and it’s fair that you’re having sex with my best friend?!”

“You’re such a baby!” Regulus pushed Sirius, who stumbled back. He was then met with a punch to the face from the older brother.

“Sirius!” James screamed, grabbing Regulus. He was sobbing now, though he wasn’t sure when it had started. The crowd was staring now, whispers erupting around them. 

“Get out! All of you!” Sirius cried, and most people walked out, James handed Regulus to Barty.

“Go, now.” He whispered. Barty did, Evan following close behind. The girls left, probably to eavesdrop from the hallways. The room was quiet now, except for Sirius’s heavy breathing. Remus was grabbing at Sirius’s arm, each time the boy had pulled away. Peter had left with the girls, which left James, Sirius, and Remus, drunk and angry. Well, Remus probably wasn’t angry, but still. 

“I hate you-” Sirius spat, “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you-” Sirius repeated, tears running down his cheeks.

“Pads-”

“Don’t call me that!” Sirius shouted, shoving James.

“Sirius!” Remus exclaimed.

“Sirius- You don’t mean that-” James whispered.

“Yes I do! You- You- how long?” Sirius hissed.

“You don’t want to kn-” James started.

“Yes I do.”

“A little after the quidditch match” James mumbled, Sirius tensed.

“Get out- Get out before I kick you out-” Sirius hissed.

“You can’t kick him out-” Remus started, and Sirius shoved James. James smiled at Remus, eyes full of tears, and walked out of the common room. He wandered down the halls, until eventually winding up by the dungeons. He knocked shakily, and Evan opened the door.

“Shit, James you okay?” James nodded.

“Where?-”

“Asleep.” Evan sighed, motioning for James to come in. Bart was on the couch, leg bouncing up and down and muttering how he would kill Sirius if he ever saw him again. And James just broke. He collapsed and sobbed. He sobbed and sobbed until his head felt fuzzy, breaths coming in shorter and shorter. 

He had lost his best friend, and had fucked everything up. It was his fault, his fault Regulus got hurt, if he hadn’t made Regulus go then none of this would have happened. He expressed this to Barty and Evan through sobs.

“No- James,” Evan said, before Barty hugged the Gryffindor boy tightly. Evan joined in after a moment of confusion.
“It- it’s my fault,” James sobbed, crying into Barty’s shoulder.

“No it’s not,” Barty hissed, “it’s not your fault Sirius has the emotional maturity of a five year old.” Evan chuckled at that. 

“But- Reg got- Reg got hurt and it’s all my fault and he’s gonna hate me forever and ever and I lost Sirius-”

“Shut up!” Barty snapped, rolling his eyes. “Regulus doesn’t have the capacity to hate you James. He loves you more than I think even he knows.”

Chapter Text

Regulus- 

Regulus woke up with a sharp pain in his nose, he touched it tenderly and winced.

“Shit-” he muttered, pulling his hand away. His head ached and last night was foggy, all he could really remember was yelling and his fucking brother punching him. He looked next to him and jumped.

“HolyshitJamespotterwhatareyoudoinginmybed!?” The younger boy cried, toppling back. James shot up immediately, glancing over the edge of the green sheets with concern at the younger boy who was now on the floor.

“Fuck- Reg I’m sorry!” James hissed, pulling Regulus back up to the bed. Regulus winced and glared at James, but that hurt too so he relaxed his expression in annoyance. James handed him a cool glass of water and sighed.

“What happened last night?” Regulus groaned, and James tensed.

“I- er- Sirius- he, he found out about-” James didn’t have to finish, a heavy sense of dread settled into Regulus’s stomach. 

“Shit- shit-shit- after we- no-,” Regulus gasped, words coming out in incoherent rambles. He had just made up with Sirius and then he fucked it all up because he was too drunk to fucking lie. James seemed to sense his internal dread and shook his head quickly.

“No- No way in hell is this your fault, love,” James whispered, pulling Regulus’s small frame into a hug. 

As the day went on, Regulus noticed the argument seemed to hurt James more than it hurt Regulus. James was having to grapple with the fact that Sirius ‘hated’ him, and Regulus was just used to it. That didn’t make it hurt any less. Peter and Remus came down to the dungeons later that day. James let them in and they all sat in Regulus’s dorm. As soon as they got in Peter started rambling.

“I’msorryJamesIdidn’tthink- Sirius didn’t-” and then the boy just went to wrap his friend in the tightest hug known to humanity, sobbing softly. Remus looked down at his shoes, leg bouncing nervously.

“So how is the bastard?” Regulus asked Remus, Remus chuckled a bit and shook his head.

“Sirius- he hasn’t left his room all day, refusing to talk to anyone, the usual” Remus mumbled,worry lacing his tone. Regulus nodded, standing up.

“You two, take care of James. I need to talk to my dear old brother,” Regulus gave Remus a cold smile, and the taller boy nodded.

“Don’t let him punch you again,” Remus said as Regulus was walking out.

“If he punches me, I make him bald.” The black haired boy said, voice and expression stone cold. Remus laughed and Regulus shut the door.

Was he nervous about approaching his brother? Yes. Would he do it for James’s sake? Also yes. 

He got up to Gryffindor tower relatively fast, and swung open the door. It was still a mess from last night’s party, Regulus’s blood stained the dark red carpet. He snorted, and walked up to the dorms. The younger Black brother didn’t even knock, he swung open the door and yanked the sheets of Sirius.

“You’re a pathetic bastard,” Sirius hissed, grabbing for his sheets back. 

“Thank you.” Regulus said, pulling out his want and incinerating the blankets to ashes. The black specks fluttered onto the floor and landed in a neat pile. 

“Hey!” Sirius complained.

“Shut up, James has been sad all day and it’s your fucking fault, so you are going to fix it or so help me-” Regulus didn’t get to finish before Sirius cut him off.

“Oh shut up!” He cried, “You’re ignoring the fact that he was fucking you!”

“It is none of your business!"

“It’s my business when my emotionally closed off brother is dating my emotionally damaged best friend! If you hurt him Regulus Black I- “

“I would never!” Regulus shouted, and Sirius seemed to falter at the raw emotion in his younger brother’s tone. “I fucking love him Sirius-”

“Shut up! You- I-”

“No Sirius! I will not shut up, because unlike you I don’t have the option to date whoever I want! And James is the most supportive, understanding, lovable, fucking idiot out there!” There were tears in Regulus’s eyes now, which surprised him. 

“He’s also the most gullible one! And if you manipulate him then-” Sirius whipped his own eyes and blinked, stray tears rolling down his sharp pale cheeks. They sat in silence, the only sound being the heavy breaths between them. Eventually, Sirius spoke up, voice shaky. “Look, we both care about James, I just don’t know if he can handle being hurt.”

“He’s not fragile Sirius”

“I know- Believe me I know!” Sirius laughed, tears falling. 

“Then fucking fix it.” Regulus said coldly, “or you’re going bald.” Sirius nodded, standing up.

“Yeah okay,” Sirius whispered. The two black brothers walked out and towards the dungeons. They walked in and the quiet chatter that the three remaining Marauders had created silenced. James stared at his shoes.

“I’m sorry, prongs,” Sirius sobbed, and fell into James’s arms. The two boys hugged both sobbing like shopping idiots. Remus fist bumped Regulus, and he smiled.