Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Well, that could’ve gone better.”

“Yes, it could’ve.”

“But did you see how hard I kicked that sheep girl’s ass?! No one expects spider legs! Or tonfas. I like tonfas but they’re not as cool. I don’t regret watching that one movie about that spider human superhero. Although the second movie wasn’t that good.”

“Mhm.”

“...Eggman might literally have our heads for failing to kidnap her.”

“He might.”

“You know, you’re not an easy person to hold a conversation with.”

“No, I am not.”

Jian and Cassia are on their way back to base via public bus. It was a little hard to stay under the radar considering the number of bruises visible to the eye; bruises. A lot of bruises. And a bit of ash from those rockets that robot launched at them.

Thankfully, Cassia made for a good distraction. Mainly a deflector. A lot of people either possess a lot of goodwill or are just nosy. 

“Do you want us to call an ambulance?”

Cassia just responds with any of the following:

“Does it look like we can afford it?”

“Nah but you should see the other guy!"

“No thanks, they’ll probably kill us with insane charges. Electrical or monetary? You figure it out.”

At least she’s entertaining. Jian doubts the young pronghorn would prefer her for company but she at least doesn’t seem to mind filling the void of silence for both of them. It’s appreciated. Cassia is nice company.

Are they friends? Probably not. But still.

“Ow!” Cassia hisses as the tiger bandages a wound. “You could at least be a little more gentle!”

“Sorry.” It sounds rather monotone coming from Jian, but she is trying her best to sound genuine. “You should stop squirming.”

“Urgh. Hurts like a biiiiiscuit. Biscuit.” Ah, so she did notice that there are children younger than she is here. Good save. The pronghorn nervously grins at the mother of one of said children as she glowers slightly at her. 

In turn, Jian glares at her back. The mother easily backs off. 

“Hmph.”

“Something up?” Cassia asks, flicking an ear. 

“It’s nothing.” The tiger hums. Jian applies one more bandage to a small cut on the right side of the younger islander’s head. “There. That should be all.”

“Thanks, J.”

J? Heh. Humorous indeed.

Once they make it back to base, all the way back in White Park Zone, Cassia suggests excuses to tell the doctor for their inevitable report.

“Why should we lie? I think that would land us in hotter water than we’re already in, 鬥士.” Jian disapproves. “If we were to tell the truth, we would at least have higher chances of coming out unscathed.”

“Firstly: what’cha called me?” Cassia points to her, questioning.

“Fighter.”

“Cool. Secondly: I get that but whose to say he wouldn’t lose his cool regardless? My sister and I just got here a few weeks ago. I ain’t leaving this early.”

This early? Does she aim to leave entirely then? If Cassia does, it won’t be easy. Jian doubts that the doctor would take "quitting" the Empire well. That does leave the question though… Why did Cassia and her sister join in the first place? If they weren’t here during the war, like she was back in Chun-nan, what could’ve possibly made them want to join?

Something to ponder, Jian supposes.

Now, the two of them reach their destination. The White Park Grand Chateau. This better be worth the nearly three hour bus drive.

“I’m sure there’s something we can do to appease him.” The tiger reassures as they get off the bus. “We would have succeeded after all, if not for that android showing up out of nowhere.”

“‘Almost succeeded’ is not the same as ‘completely succeeded without getting our teeth kicked in’. But you may have a point.” Cassia said. “Let’s just hope this doesn’t end badly for us.”

Jian hums in agreement.

It’s not long before they reach the chateau. The duo glance at each other before only slightly hesitating and entering the building. What greets them is… not what they were expecting.

“LIVING LIKE KINGS! YEAH!”

Rough and Tumble guffaw to the night air, slamming glass drinks together. Unsurprisingly, they smash into sharp smithereens and litter the ground dangerously. Egg Pawns come over and sweep the floor in an impressively fast manner.

Somehow, though, they look tired. Considering they are robots, that is concerning.

But neither of them were here for that.

Before Jian could say a word to the skunk brothers, Cassia yells, “Yo doofuses! It’s the IRS!”

The party immediately stops to a halt. If there were music playing, it would’ve been interrupted with that weird feedback that sounds like someone trying to scratch a balloon. Like, the one that plays during a record stop in cartoons. That’s the one.

Rough leaps over the couch and nearly balks over in shock. “GAH! Clutch was right!” He clutches his head in fervent despair, “The IRS is a bunch of assassins and cyborgs!”

“Bro…” Tumble marveled. “That is so cool and also terrifying since they’re at our doorstep.”

“I’m not even an assassin…” Jian mutters.

“SHHH, they do not need to know that.” Cassia grins, a smug finger to her upwards lips. She turns back to the skunk brothers. “Yes! We’ve come to repossess everything you own since you have not paid any taxes!”

“Wh–?! But we’ve only been CEOs for a week and a half!” Tumble shouts back. “We ain’t even got that chocolate pool we wanted!”

“Don’t you mean fountain?” The tiger asks.

“Naw. Pool. What good is a fountain?”

“...Right.”

Rough juts a finger in their direction, “You can’t take them! We won’t let you! Do you know how hard it was to get here in the first place?!”

“Yeah!” Tumble joins his short brother, “We had to hijack a bus but neither of us knew how to drive. And then we ended up crashing somewhere in the tundra! It took forever walking in one direction to get here!”

“Can you even imagine it?” Rough weeped. It was probably the fakest and somehow realest weeping either pronghorn or tiger had heard. “Or are you just as cold as the outside?” He hissed.

“There’s not even much land out here in this zone.” Jian said, squinting her eyes at them. “Nor any possible way to get lost, the chateau is advertised everywhere. Even in the forest.”

“Don’t matter! We’ve fought, bled, and sweated for this! We’ll fight you both if we gotta!”

“I can snap you two like twigs.”

“Now now,” Cassia puts her hands up reassuringly. As one can be when claiming to be the IRS and proclaiming to take away everything one holds dear to them all because they couldn’t figure out the complex nature of filling out a tax form. How devious. “I’m sure we can all work this out nonviolently. We just need to discuss things about how you run your business and go from there.” 

She walks over and drapes an arm around the big skunk’s shoulders. “We’ll go on and talk to Clutch since he was the previous owner of Clean Sweep Inc. Wouldn’t want the boring details us people in cubicles find enjoyable.”

Rough and Tumble looked to each other then towards the other two “IRS” people in question. That must’ve been that sibling telepathy thing Jian has only heard about it in rumors. Strange. Yet compelling.

“Alright. Fine.” Tumble points his thumb to the stairs behind him. “You’ll find the old man in his office. First door you see up there, can’t miss it.” He glowers at them. “Don’t either of ya swipe anything while you’re here!”

“Yeah. We got our eyes on you.” Rough does that gesture where someone is keeping their eyes on another with two fingers. 

They kept their gaze all for five seconds…

Then immediately went back to the nearby sofas, turned on a TV that didn’t look like it belonged there and cranked the volume all the way up. It makes Jian flinch and Cassia just look deadpan at the scene before her. Guess the funny facade was over.

Okay, more like annoying.

“Welp,” Cassia says, popping the P, “That’s the end of that. Let’s go. Better not delay Humpty Dumpty any longer.”

She walks off and Jian follows not soon after.

“Was it really necessary to do all that, 鬥士?” The Japanese fighter asks.

Cassia grins at her. Suddenly, a nanotech leg crawled out of her back—extending so far to where the skunk duo were partying and most definitely businessing. It grabs a party sized bag of chips before zipping back and disappearing. Of course, not before leaving the bag in her hands. She pops it open right after.

“Necessary? Nah.” Cassia munches on the chips. “I dunno. I needed a laugh at the moment. Especially before this ‘meeting’.” She holds out a chip to Jian. “Want some?”

Jian eyes it for a moment before politely taking it.

Chomp.

“Mm…” She hums. “Not bad.”

Cassia smiles to herself.

Unfortunately, it’s not long before that smile is gone. She sighs to herself and taps onto the office door.

Knock knock knock!

“Come in!” A raspy voice calls.

The door is pulled open and the two enter to find a certain opossum fiddling with a drink in his hands. He sits on a prime condition sofa chair, facing away from his guests.

“Given the loud music playing in the lobby… And the fact that there was knocking in the first place…” Clutch looks up from his glass of what may have been alcoholic cola (why that exists, neither Cassia or Jian knew). “I surmise I have genuine guests in my office.”

Jian takes lead, “We’re here on business.” 

“As I would hope. The good doctor has been rather ‘antsy’ about your report. I know as I have been on the other side of his… You know.” Clutch drawls, waving a hand of his around. He surveys his guests, “And given that there’s no hostage with you…”

“We failed, yes.” 

Cassia winces at the immediate declaration. “And we wouldn’t have if it wasn’t for that robot guy coming out of nowhere…”

“Nevertheless, I doubt he will be pleased.”

Clutch twists the head of a chipmunk doll thing. It clicks open a hidden path in the wall to the tiger and pronghorn’s left—a set of poles leading downwards. He wordlessly gestures to the spiraling secret entrance. “Ladies first.”

“They say chivalry is dead, old man.” Cassia huffs.

“Fair enough.” Clutch wastes not a moment longer and slides down onward.

Jian and Cassia glance at each other again and follow suit. What awaits them was expected but certainly startles them.

“Finally! I have been waiting for quite some time.”

It’s a little hard not to flinch at the sudden booming voice coming from the monitors in front of them but somehow they managed. It was impressive, for the record, especially when it belonged to the one man capable of ruining their lives in just one blink of an eye.

“I truly do not like waiting, as I’m sure you could guess.” Eggman grins at them, the wickedness of it apparent even through the multiple screens. If it was a happy one then he was happy purely because of the untold consequences for punishment he could enact upon them. “So! Report. Have you successfully captured that loathsome lamb?”

…

“I believe this is the part where you tell me ‘no, oh great Lord Eggman, we couldn’t handle one measly sheep despite being the best fighter my master said for me to be and having been outfitted with marvelous, state of the art nanotechnology. We humbly beg for your forgiveness!’ Am I correct?”

“Well.” Cassia begins, nonchalantly (at least attempting to be) clapping her hands together, “I personally wouldn’t say some of that.”

“WELL YOU SHOULD!” The doctor yells. Now the two of them flinch. “Seriously?! Neither of you could have held your own against some lowlife nobody?!” He points a finger at Jian. “I expected more from Connie’s so-called best follower and foot soldier!”

Clutch, who was standing at the side of the monitors, seems to find this amusing. It must be nice to be on the other side of the victims of the humanized egg. The tiger sees this and glowers at him momentarily before stepping to defend herself.

“Master Conquering Storm,” It was said with emphasis as she was worried her master would suddenly barge through the walls for the ridiculing name given to her. Despite being underground. “Was not wrong to place her faith in me for this mission, sir.” Jian said, bowing. “I swear, we would have succeeded in securing the target had it not been for an android overwhelming us and forcing us to retreat.”

That grabs the doctor’s attention, pausing his anger. “What android?”

“It was this weird yellow and black robot with a third eye on his forehead. I think.” Cassia recalls. She mutters, “He knocked the shit outta me.”

“Hmm…” Eggman clacks away at his keyboard. Eventually, a visual of the robot Jian and Cassia fought is shown through the screens. “Are you referring to this unit?”

“Got it in one.”

“Then it is a gizoid, not an android.” He corrects. “Tell me, where did you two encounter him?”

“In the forest by, well, Floral Forest Village.”

“Is that right?” He grins once again. “You two may have failed this mission but at least you did not come up completely empty handed! Congratulations, you live to see another day!”

A shiver runs down the spines of the lowly soldiers of Eggman. They both knew that they really dodged a bullet there.

“Standby for reassignment. I need to think for a moment.”

BEEP!

…

“Do you still have those chips?”

“Yeah. You want the rest?”

“Yes, please.”

Eggman’s Think Room may as well be his chambers. He spends the most of his time there.

Most of, if not all, his brainstorming takes place here. The only things surrounding him are his technological machines, cameras, and screens. It was a time in his schedule he takes seriously out of everything. Even breakfast. Everyone knows that breakfast was the most important meal of the day.

But this was not a time for food. It was a time for thinking.

Let’s see…

He knew Gemerl was “alive” and well for a while now, ever since the Metal Virus fiasco. It’s not as if he was easy to avoid considering how hostile he was towards Metal Sonic. And of course, he was one of the volunteers to retrieve a Chaos Emerald from one of the zeti. 

Ohohoho, no, he wouldn’t forget one of his creations simply like that!

If Eggman was going to pull this off, he would need resources and caution. As much as he would like to say that his genius alone would be enough—and it is! Crafting his latest project is another beast to conquer. Especially for how… unpredictable the key material is.

Should he use construction bots—they would be destroyed. Whether from the material itself or by Eggman’s own hands for being so careless with his project. Seriously! These resources are not cheap! Hence why Clutch’s business is still afloat but that is besides the point.

And it certainly doesn’t help that his newer bases scattered throughout the islands are being targeted by vigilantes—and succeeding to leave the locations in smithereens and ashes! Perhaps that will be Jian and Cassia’s next task.

Back on topic.

The mention of this particular former unit of his empire had drudged up a memory.

During the war, after Eggman had destroyed G.U.N, he had retrieved something from their remains. Something he thought he would never see.

His grandfather’s journal.

…

It detailed how Gerald came into possession of the gizoid that was Emerl. Yes, Sonic and his friends did name him. Yes, he was going to use it because the name had stuck at this point. It would also be confusing as of now.

Why would it be confusing?

Because there was a second gizoid! Hidden in the depths of Angel Island! At least, the latter is more of an educated guess.

Ivo’s grandfather hid a secret message in his journal. It hadn’t taken long to decipher its meaning and revealed the contents of this second gizoid.

To paraphrase: a pair of ancient robots were found. One discovered by Gerald and one by his… father.

Gerald did in fact discover something other than the Master Emerald during his trek through Angel Island. That being a different model of the gizoid that supposedly brought the end of the Fourth Great Civilization. Not a soldier. Not even a weapon.

An engineer. A helper. A fixer.

To the point: the gizoid was built to run on Chaos Energy. To withstand such unstable and aptly chaotic energy—it is more than enough to handle this project itself! Despite claims saying so, Eggman sincerely doubt the material was more powerful than the Chaos Emeralds. 

That is, assuming this model runs on that like the previous gizoid. It more than likely is. Let’s hope so, because this is the newly formed backup plan. 

Eggman didn’t so much need that sheep person—moreso the bell wispon she possessed. He was going over past footage to fabricate new plans using old formulas. This clip he had come across during the glory of Eggperial City was interesting. 

It was uniquely built, hardly that of the likes of any other wispon he’s seen during his time of taking over over 99% of the planet. Prower certainly didn’t make it; he may be a genius and has built weapons of sorts in the past, but none involving the intricacy of wisps.

Someone else made that bell.

He had hoped that by forcing the info of who made it out of that lamb or perhaps tracking it down via the wispon, he could force said engineer to make what he needed. It was certainly impressive! Not that he’d admit it.

Unfortunately, that plan went down the drain.

Now, in regards to this Gemerl he created, when Eggman attempted to utilize him, it had betrayed him and nearly caused destruction with the Chaos Emeralds. He did originally use Emerl’s coding for him. Could it be that the very same code that lied within him caused this betrayal? After all, Emerl was Sonic and Prower’s pet project and linked with that blue rodent instead.

There goes the idea of capturing this Gemerl. No point.

So, to avoid another disaster, Eggman would have to use a unique string of coding. That is, if failing to link with this gizoid ends up failing for a second time. He wasn't even sure if it had that same startup.

Hmm…

…

That’s it!

CLICK!

“Boss!” Cubot calls, “We have your coffee!”

“Made just the way you like it!” Orbot smiles.

Well, there goes that. Whatever.

“It better be good this time.” Eggman growls underneath his breath, “I was not excited to hear you accidentally added salt to my previous cup.”

“It’s not my fault, sugar and salt look exactly the same!” Cubot cries. “There’s hardly any paper here to label them!”

“Or any pens or pencils.” Orbot says.

“Then find something else to write with! Surely, in all the years I’ve spent trying to fully conquer this planet, I invented something that could be used to write.”

“You’d be surprised.” Cubot dryly says. He hovers over and hands the doctor his coffee. “Here you go, boss.”

Of course, Eggman does not say thank you. He simply scoffs before he takes it from his assistant and sips it.

“...It’s better than the last time, I’ll give you that.” He reluctantly says. “Even though the bar isn’t a high one.”

“I’ll take it! My dream of owning my very own cafe is one step closer to reality!” Cubot cheers. 

Orbot looks almost worried, “I think you read too many stories on that one website.” He turns to his boss, questioning, “What has you thinking so ahead of your schedule, boss?”

“My latest project, of course! If I am to succeed, I need that gizoid from Angel Island! And pronto!” Eggman answers.

“Er, what’s a gizoid?” Cubot asks, scratching his head.

Eggman looks at him with confused irritation, “How do you not–?! Oh, wait. Right. I hadn’t yet created you two yet.” He then sighs, almost fondly reminiscing, “Such happier times.”

“Oof. Tell us how you really feel, boss.” Orbot says, picking away at some holographics.

Cubot frowns, “I think I felt my heart die a little. Eh.” He shrugs. “I’ll get a new one.”

“Shut it. Anyway, gizoids are ancient androids essentially. Supposedly, the one I operated had destroyed the Fourth Great Civilization. After the plan involving that gizoid failed, I attempted to create one, which you may remember witnessing during the Metal Virus."

"I've seen people calling that time the 'Iron Plague'." Cubot said. "It has a nice ring to it."

Eggman shrugs. "It does. These rodents can be creative when they want to be.

"Back on track, I recently remembered from my father’s journal that he had found a different model of typical soldier gizoids, pertaining to that of an engineer.” Eggman explains. “It’s located on Angel Island. How we’re going to get it off there is the question.”

“How do you know it’s still there? I mean,” Orbot starts, “If it’s an ancient robot that was last seen around 50 years ago, who is to say someone hasn’t already found it?”

The doctor grins. “Then that makes this operation all the easier! Saves me time of needing to get it out of the ground and risking the attention of that blasted knucklehead.”

“So all we gotta do is find it and get it! How do we do that?” Cubot wonders aloud.

“Simple!” Eggman said. “All we have to do is track it via the Chaos Energy that lies dormant inside it. After all, it’s not as if it isn't infinite power itself.” He looks at his assistants, “And by we, I mean you. Get to it.”

“Right away boss! And…” Orbot holds up a single finger in anticipation. “We found it! Wow. You know, I’m not sure if that should’ve worked.”

“It worked because it was the correct solution and I’m a genius.” The human egg said. “Now. Where is it?”

“Spiral Hill Village, sir.”

“...I’m sorry, what?”

Orbot pulls up a visual; he points to a blinking red dot. On it was the location detailing Spiral Hill—spefically, a Mineral Museum. Self-explanatory.

Well, Eggman did say if anyone found it before him, it would just make his job easier. Although, he is curious as to how and when this happened. And who managed to find the gizoid before he did.

No matter. Time for a mission!

“Shall I contact Metal Sonic for this?” Orbot asks.

“No, this is a little below Metal’s paygrade.” Eggman flaps a hand. He sits up in her chair, “We have someone new in the Eggman Empire—this will be a great test for her.”

"We get paid?"

"No."

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot that we hired fleshy guys. Is that a thing we’re doing now?” Cubot said. “I thought after Starline and that other guy from the war, we would’a stick with robots and stuff.”

“If that were the case, you two would’ve been reduced to scrap for your seemingly constant incompetence.” The egg human sneers. “Get her on the phone.”

"...Who? The tiger and her friend? Stormy?"

"Ugh, Clove, you idiot! Call her!"

BRRRING… BRRRING… BRRRING.

It’s him.

Better not keeping him waiting.

PING!

“Hello?”

“Why hello, Clove!” The grinning face of a madman fills her base’s screen. “I do hope you’re settling in well.”

He wants something. It’s not easy to hold back a sigh.

“I am, thank you sir.”

“Good! Because I finally have a mission for you!”

There it is. It was to be expected and really, she can’t complain. Literally, she can’t complain too much otherwise she’ll be landing herself and, more importantly, her sister in hot water.

“What is it you need me to do?”

“In Spiral Hill, there is something known as a gizoid in the Mineral Museum. I need you to retrieve it and bring it to Shamar. There, we’ll begin testing it for my latest project.”

“Yes, sir. Consider it done.”

“Once I see positive results, I will.” Eggman sneers. “I will, of course, provide you transport and a small array of badniks necessary to carry out this task. I expect a report in a few days. Get to it.”

“Right away, sir.”

“Good.” The doctor says. He’s about to cut the transmission off before saying, “Oh, and do be sure to check on your sister. She already has one strike to her for failing me already. Be sure not to slip up.”

“...Of course, sir.”

CLICK.

…

Clove pulls out her phone. She dials the only number she has. Not soon after, a voice is heard.

“Hey, sis! What’s up?”

“I received my first mission. And just got off of a call with Eggman.”

“Oof. He tell ya what happened on my end then?”

“That you ‘failed’ your mission, yes. Are you okay?”

“...”

“Cass?”

“I… would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little shaken up. But I’ll be fine.”

“And what of your… coworker?”

“You mean Jian? We’re friends already! I guess not everyone here is all that bad. Just… mostly bad.”

“I can imagine. What will you do now?”

“We already got new orders. Apparently, there’s some guys trashing newer bases the doc’s built. We can’t track them since they aren’t using any tech for us to, y’know, track them with. We’re heading out to a new base out by Clove Sea to try and get the jump on 'em. Heh. Get it? It’s a ‘you’ sea.”

“Hilarious. Listen, I have to move out now. In a few days, I’ll be in Shamar. Keep me updated?”

“You gotcha. Stay safe, love ya.”

“Love you too. And you as well.”

“Safety is my middle name!”

“No… Your middle name is cutiepie.”

“Gah, shut up!!”

Laughing a bit, Clove hangs up. The good moment passes. With no hint of any expression on her face, she moves to get ready.

Time to go to work.