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Chapter Text

   It was the fourth consecutive day that Gon was tardy to his first period pre-calc class. Coincidentally, it was also the four day anniversary of Gon's and Retz's pre-relationship stage.

And, Killua absolutely noticed. He also noticed Gon had seemed.. almost, drained recently. I mean, how could he have not? The two had practically been attached at the hip since sixth grade.

Killua watched Gon with a concerned look on his face as he handed the teacher his tardy slip and slid into his seat spiritlessly. Killua averted his gaze from Gon to the floor for a while.

The teacher, Mr. Wing, had already began his lecture. But to Killua, it just went in one ear and out the other. The same could be said for Gon.

It was odd. Usually, Gon would come into first period and essentially talk Killua's ear off. But as of these last four days, he hasn't gotten so much as a 'Good-morning, Killua!'.

The sound of chalk scratching and Wing's voice echoed through the silent classroom, filled with many sleep-deprived teenagers. Gon included. He adjusted his gaze to Gon once again, who was slumped in his chair, already appearing to be dozing off.

Sure, Gon was never one to enjoy math class by any means, but he never slept in class. Most of the time, he would be scolding Killua for doing such.

He lightly nudged Gon with his foot under the table, attempting to gain his attention without attracting others. Gon's body jumped a little in his seat, which made it clear to Killua that he really was dozing off.

"Gon." He whispered, keeping his head low and turned in Gon's direction.

Gon rubbed his eyes lazily, "Hm?"

"Is Mr. Wing's star pupil really sleeping in class?" Killua teased, still keeping his voice low.

"Mmm, shut up. I'm not sleeping," Gon grumbled, "and if anything, you're the star pupil. Mr. math genius." He giggled quietly, putting that last part in air quotes.

Killua raised an eyebrow, "Oh really? How come I literally just had to wake you up?"

Gon blinked, then sighed in defeat, "Okay. I might have been sleeping. I've had a long couple of nights."

"Long couple of nights?"

"Too much to explain right now."

"Promise to tell me about it later?"

"I promise, Killua."

"Good. Seriously, you get mad at me for keeping stuff from you and then turn around and pull a stunt like this." He rolled his eyes. Gon just shrugged and reached into his bag to pull out a pen.

Then, Killua felt his pocket buzz. He took out his phone, sneakily hiding it under the desk in order to not catch Wing's attention. There, he saw a text message from his current boyfriend, Kenji.

8:12 kenji: hey, shalnark's having a party today with the guys, they said I could invite you

Killua stared at the text message for a moment. As if he would willingly hang around Kenji's idiot friends.

8:16 killua: hi sorry I'm staying after to watch Gon practice lmao. but next time?

The screen showed Kenji typing, then it stopped, then started again for a few minutes.

8:18 kenji: last time I checked, I was your boyfriend?:(

8:19 killua: you are I just have plans with my (best)friend haha

8:20 kenji: the party isn't until after 6 surely you'd make it

Killua rolled his eyes at Kenji's despicable inability to read his social cues.

8:22 killua: uhh probably gonna go to Gon's place after and stay the night sorry
read, 8:22AM.

Killua let out a breath he wasn't fully aware he had been holding. He tucked his phone back into his pocket, glancing over at Gon who was very clearly struggling to understand the concept of trigonometric functions.

"You good over there?"

"Shh!! I'm trying to listen." Gon shushed.

"Excuse me?" Killua teased in a challenging voice, leaning in so far to the point where his face was mere inches away from Gon's cheek.

Gon laughed and gave him a playful shove on the head, forcing him to lean back. Under normal circumstances, Killua would have declared war. But he decided against it as to not get Gon into any more trouble.

"You're lucky we're in class." Killua grumbled, only half-joking.

________

Killua sat in his fourth period Spanish class, bouncing his leg up and down out of habit. Thoughts of his flimsy relationship clouded his mind. He needed to get out of this class and get to lunch, where he could get his mind off of things. And more importantly, talk with his best friend, who was conveniently always the best at getting Killua's mind off of anything that bugged him.

After a long forty minutes of eyeing the clock, the bell finally rang, signaling Gon and Killua's lunch period at last. Killua packed up all his belongings and sped out of the class, pushing his way past all of his smaller classmates, being the whopping six foot ‘nothing’ giant he was. He navigated his way through the busy halls to the spot him and Gon meet everyday before lunch: Gon's locker.

As he approached, he noticed a short blonde haired girl standing in front of Gon, her hand resting on his chest flirtatiously.

Must be Retz. He rolled his eyes and kept walking forward until he was at Gon's side, slugging an arm around Gon's shoulder. A little too close by his side for Retz to approve. When she saw him, she removed her hand from Gon's chest and instead crossed them in front of her.

"Hi Killua!" Gon smiled, taking his attention off the girl in front of him.

"Hey. We gotta go, don't wanna be late." Killua shifted his gaze towards Retz, "You don't mind if I steal Gon here, do you?" He smiled, practically dangling Gon on a stick right in front of her.

"We were actually talking. Can you just hold up a sec?" She replied.

"Nah, sorry, we have an important project due. We have to work on it. Like, now." Killua asserted, squeezing Gon's shoulder as if to silently tell him to keep quiet.

Retz raised an eyebrow in suspicion, "Uh, right."

"So, you don't mind?" Killua repeated, an innocent glint in his tone.

She put on a strained smile. "Not at all."

"Cool, see 'ya." Killua began to move, pushing Gon lightly forward at the small of his back.

"Bye Retz, talk to you later." Gon called back as he followed Killua's lead.

"Bye."

"We don't have a project due any time soon, Killua." Gon commented.

Killua snickered, "I know."

"That was rude."

"I wasn't being rude, I was making sure she wasn't late by using up all her passing period talking to you!" Killua huffed defensively.

"Yeah, sure—and the sky is green." Gon giggled.

"Whatever you say."

Killua tugged on Gon's arm and pulled him closer behind him, assuring he wouldn't lose him in the crowd of high school students. He let go of Gon and let him follow on his own once they neared the cafeteria. Unfortunately, at this point, Killua's wish of not being late had already been thrown out the window as the bell rang.

"Mm, Killua?" Gon muttered lazily.

"What's up?" Killua replied, slowing down to match Gon's delayed walking speed.

"Did Retz sound mad? Honestly, I can't tell anymore." He grumbled.

Killua raised an eyebrow, "Uh, no? Why? Does she have anything to do with your last four tardies?"

"Dunno, maybe. I don't think I feel like sorting through all the details right now." Gon rubbed the back of his head as the two made their way inside and towards their usual table.

When they sat down, Ikalgo and Meleoron were already there, chatting away passionately about some debate neither two felt like asking about at the moment.

Their two friends noticed them and pulled away from their previous conversation.

"Look who's here! Not like you two to be late for lunch." Meleoron teased, earning an eye roll from Killua and a very delayed laugh from Gon. Ikalgo looked at Killua, with an even amount of confusion and concern in his expression.

Meleoron leaned in closer to Killua's ear, adjusting his voice to a quiet whisper,"What's up with him?"

Killua shrugged, "dunno, he won't tell me yet, he's being a weirdo."

"I literally hear you guys talking about me," Gon stuck his tongue out, blowing a raspberry. Killua did as well, right back at him.

"Anyway, Mito baked banana bread yesterday, she told me to bring some for you guys." Gon said, pulling out his lunch box, offering the container of banana bread to the other three.

Killua was already busy taking a bite out of the hugest chunk of banana bread Gon and to offer.

"Oh, God, that's perfect." Ikalgo chuckled as he took a piece, "My little brother insisted on packing my lunch for me yesterday, and I'm only now realizing how bad of an idea it was."

Meleoron grabbed a slice and popped it into his mouth, licking his fingers immediately after. "Wow, remind me to thank Miss Mito!"

"Oh yeah, same here, this is really good. If only you had her baking skills." Killua grinned.

Gon flicked him on the nose, gently, but hard enough. "Hey! I'll have you know I am a fine baker. Don't underestimate my abilities."

"Jee, okay, okay." Killua mumbled, rubbing his nose with two fingers. The two other boys laughed at their bickering.

"Fighting like an old married couple, it's always the same with you two." Ikalgo laughed.

"Yeah, whatever. Anyway, Gon, are you not gonna eat?" Killua asked, half out of genuine concern and half due to the fact he was hoping to eat the left overs.

It's not like he didn't have a fully stocked fridge at home. Killua was just too lazy to make his own lunch everyday, and the cafeteria food was nothing more than pure slop to him.

"I don't think so. You can have it, I'm so tired." Gon mumbled drowsily.

"If you insist." Killua grabbed a hold of Gon's lunch box and began rummaging through it.

Ikalgo's worried expression returned to his face, "Gon, are you okay? You've been weird these past few days."

"Yeah, you're acting more like Killua than yourself." Meleoron added, Killua gave him a playful shove and went back to wolfing down Gon's grilled cheese.

"I'm fine, don't worry. I've just been staying up longer these last few nights. Really." He yawned, stretching his arms over his head. "Killua, let me lay on you."

Killua paused and looking at him for a moment, blinking. "Um. Sure. Don't expect me to stay still, though."

Gon looked up, a smug grin forming from his lips. "Okay. Maybe I'll go over and sleep on Retz then."

"She's not even—are you—are you trying to make me jealous—Ugh, whatever. Come here." Killua stuttered in between words, before throwing an arm around Gon and pulling him to his shoulder.

Killua shivered for a split second, Gon's full weight pressing against him as he slugged an arm around Killua's stomach to steady himself better.

"You're too much, you know that, Gon?" Killua grumbled.

"You love it." He teased.

"Hopeless." Ikalgo whispered to Meleoron, pressing two fingers at the bridge of his nose, "absolutely hopeless."

"I know exactly what you mean." He chuckled, "So—anyway,"

"Yes. Meleoron. Jesus Christ. Water is wet." Ikalgo hissed.

"Okay. No. You don't understand."

Ikalgo rolled his eyes. "Enlighten me."

But before he could respond, Kenji was already sitting down in between Killua and Meleoron.

"Hi Killua." He smiled, planting a kiss to Killua's flushed cheek.

"Um, hi. What's up?" He turned to face him, subconsciously rubbing circles on the arm of an already long asleep Gon.

"What's up with him?"

"He's tired, some personal stuff." Killua replied, his tone slightly colder.

"Mm. Okay. Anyway, I came here just to, you know.. about the party, y'know how much I love it when you come with me to these kinds of things." Kenji reminded.

Ikalgo whispered something inaudible into Meleoron's ear.

"And you know how much I hate going to those kinds of things with you, Kenji." Killua rolled his eyes. Kenji bit his lip, now clearly uncomfortable.

"Right. Sorry. But text me if you change your mind, I'll pick you up from Gon's at any time yeah?"

"Mhm." Killua nodded as Kenji walked back off to his lunch table, made up of Shalnark, Uvogin, Feitan, Machi, and Phinks. Lunch was always a problem. Since Killua's friend group hated Kenji's friend group, while Kenji's friend group also hated Killua's friend group.

Still, Killua didn't mind. Sitting with a smaller crowd was better than a bigger one.

"That was kind of weird." Meleoron spoke, breaking the prolonged silence.

"I guess." Killua shrugged.

"Are you and him, like, okay?" Ikalgo inquired.

Killua blinked for a few beats before replying. "I dunno, we're fine, I guess. He just wants me to go to some idiot party along with his idiot friends."

Meleoron chuckled, "Sounds about right. You gonna hide out at Gon's?"

"I hope so." Killua mumbled. Gon's body shifted, his body stretching more across the benches and his head falling into Killua's lap. Killua tried not to pay attention as he scarfed down the remainder of Gon's lunch.

____

Gon slid into his seat, already pulling out everything he needed for his photography electives class.

When he looked back up from his backpack, Retz was standing just behind his laptop in front of him.

"Oh, hey Retz." He greeted nervously, feeling butterflies suddenly swarm his stomach.

"Hi, Gon, how'd the project go? Y'know, with Killua?" Retz asked genuinely as she leaned forward into him.

"What pro—oh—that project. It went great!" Gon laughed, almost getting caught up in Killua's stupid white lie.

"Good to hear! Anyway, I wanted to ask..." she paused, Gon tilted his head, eagerly awaiting her request.

"You know Killua's boyfriend? Or Shalnark?"

"Yeah, Kenji and Shalnark? I know of them." Gon replied, not sure of where this was going.

"Shalnark's having a party today, Kenji and Killua are probably going, so I was wondering if you would go with me?" Retz suggested, twiddling her thumbs.

Gon felt a little heat rise to his cheeks, "Oh, man. I'm sorry, I wish I could."

"Why can't you?" She raised an eyebrow, fixing her posture and placing both hands on her hips.

Gon froze for a second, scouring his brain for an excuse to get out of this situation. Truth be told, it wasn't that he couldn't go. He just didn't want to. Why? Because of the people that would be attending.

He wasn't a huge fan of Kenji's friends, nor was he a huge fan of Kenji to begin with. But he would never tell Killua that, in Gon's eyes, they had the perfect relationship. He would never want to ruin that for Killua. But to him, they were all just a bunch of  'too cool for everybody else' druggies who didn't give a single crap about their future outside of high school.

"I have to.. um.. help Mito with her bakery! Tomorrow! It's always swamped on the weekends, haha." He chuckled awkwardly. Retz didn't look convinced.

"I don't see why that clashes with the party? It's tonight, not tomorrow." Retz spoke.

Gon cringed, "I just want to be well rested, you know."

"Mm. Okay, I guess that makes sense." She frowned.

Gon was now completely washed over with guilt, "Yeah, sorry about that. Maybe next time."

"Mhm, I'll text you later." She smiled, walking back off to her seat.

Gon sighed, finally releasing a tight breath he had been holding as he waited for her to finally sit down.

That was awkward.

Chapter Text

     Flower petals fell gracefully from the trees above as Gon and Killua passed them by, giving the two a sight for sore eyes. A couple pretty pink petals landed on top of them. They laughed and shook them off, continuing forward on a far less scenic path. They walked together, matching their pace and syncing their leg movements without any force.

"Killua, do you want me to walk you home?" Gon offered.

"Pfft—okay—first of all, I would be the one walking you home." Killua snorted.

Gon tilted his head, "What, like, if we were dating?"

"No—what-not like that! Gosh, Gon." Killua grumbled.

"I'm just teasing you, Killua, what were you saying?"

Killua cleared his throat, "ahem..anyway, second of all.. I was wondering if I could stay with you tonight."

Gon raised an eyebrow in curiosity, "Isn't Shalnark having a party? I thought you'd be going with Kenji."

"I actually told him I was gonna watch you practice today..." Killua admitted, rubbing the back of his head nervously. 

"School season for soccer doesn't start for like.. another week, Killua, what are you taking about?" Gon asked, his head absolutely befuddled. 

"I know that, I just didn't want to go to the party. I also told him I would be sleeping over at yours today. That's why I'm asking."

"Won't he get mad at you for lying about my practice?"

"Probably. If he finds out. I'll tell him you're in club or something." Killua shrugged.

"Oh, okay."

Killua fidgeted with his backpack strap, "Are you mad?"

Gon jumped up, "Huh? Of course not! I love it when you come over!"

"Uh, so what is it, then?" Killua questioned.

"Nothing, just wondering why you've been so distant with Kenji, really. Is everything alright?"

"Uhm.." Killua muttered skittishly, "I don't know, I guess I'm just not feeling it anymore. And I think he has a problem with how much time I spend with you."

"Aww," Gon cooed teasingly at Killua, "and you won't let him think he can take my place?"

"Christ, shut up Gon. You know what I mean."

"O'course, anyway, are you gonna break up with him?"

"I'll probably just wait for him to break up with me." Killua announced, "I don't want things to get messy or anything."

A few more beats of silence passed as they began to approach Gon's house. Gon reached into his bag, pulling out his keys and sorting through them to find the right one.

"So, why do you think he's gonna break up with you?" Gon asked, his tone casual as he jammed the key inside the lock, twisting it to the right.

Killua let out a short, breathy laugh, "probably 'cause I'm a moody asshole."

"You're not a moody asshole." Gon stated, his tone firm now.

He held swung open the door and stepped aside to let Killua in. Killua just shrugged and walked inside. Turning the corner, he saw Mito sprawled across the couch, watching some game show on the TV.

"Aunt Mito? Hi." He greeted, plastering on a sweet smile. As sweet as Killua could look, anyway.

She quickly jumped, startled, and sat up right. "Gosh! You boys scared me!" She giggled, getting up and walking into the kitchen where the boys had already placed their school bags down.

"Hi Killua." She smiled, then turned to Gon with a more stern look on her face, "Gon, you should've told me you were bringing Killua over today! I would have made you two something to eat."

"I'm sorry—" Gon apologized, frantic, but Killua quickly cut him off. "It's my fault, I kind of invited myself over. I'm really sorry." He rubbed the back of his head nervously.

Her look softened, and her smile returned. "Oh, no worries, then. Are you boys hungry?" she asked, already kneeling down and grabbing some cooking utensils out of the drawer.

"Mm, we're okay! We were actually just about to head back out, we just wanted to drop off our bags." Gon announced.

"Oh, where to?" Mito paused, then resumed in putting everything back in its rightful place.

"We're just gonna stay for the sunset at our spot."

"Hm, sounds about right." Mito giggled.

Gon and Killua's 'spot' was just a regular old rocky cliff above the Whale Island lake. They considered it their own special spot, well, because it was.

Back in sixth grade, before they had gotten close, Killua was practicing his skateboarding just a few feet back, behind the trees. Gon just so happened to be picking flowers to give to Aunt Mito, for Valentine's Day. But really, he had ended up getting distracted by Killua's awesome moves.

Until Killua fell into a tree, and ate shit. He looked up and found Gon, his classmate, staring. Which only aided to his humiliation. He quickly shot up and marched over to Gon, where he towered over him.

"You better not tell anybody." He threatened, repeatedly tapping a finger at Gon's forehead.

Gon didn't reply at first. Staring at him blankly.

Then, he reached out his hand, full of various roses and colorful tulips.

Killua took the bunch in his hand, almost a little stunned with confusion. "Um."

"You can have them. I didn't mean to embarrass you." Gon smiled, despite the hostility he had just been shown.

Which, in present time, was a trait about Gon that Killua had grown to both love and hate.

"Oh. Thanks." He mumbled awkwardly, now even more embarrassed with his behavior. "I should be the one that's sorry for being rude."

"It's okay. You're Killua, right?"

"Yep."

They ended up staying until sunset, watching the water together from the cliff above. Which had earned Gon a very righteous scolding from Mito. But it was all worth it in the end, as it began their now unbreakable bond.

"Well, you two boys have fun. Answer your phones, okay?" Mito waved them off.

"Yup! Bye!" Gon grinned, shoving Killua quickly out the door before his aunt had the chance to change her mind about letting them go.

"Jeez, Gon! Slow down!" Killua cried, setting himself loose out of Gon's grip.

Gon chuckled, "sorry, I didn't want her to change her mind. You know how she is."

"Well it's fine now, we can take our time." Killua assured as they walked along the path leading to their spot, at a much slower pace now.

"Thanks." Killua mumbled, the words barely audible.

"For?"

Killua's pale skin had a light pink tint to it now, "I dunno, for saying I'm not a moody asshole, I guess."

"But you aren't." Gon frowned.

They walked the rest of the way in a semi-comfortable silence between the two, sounds of birds chirping and water flowing filled their ears. The transition from summer to fall was always their favorite.

They sat down next to each other, leaning their backs against a tree nearing the front of the cliff, hips and shoulders touching softly.

"So," Killua paused, "are you gonna tell me why you've been weird these past few days?"

"Does Illumi know you're sleeping over?"

"Gon."

"And Alluka? Is she fine by herself?"

"I texted him. And Alluka is sleeping at Neon's. Can you please tell me what's up?"

Gon sighed, "you know I don't like bringing my girl problems into our friendship."

Killua crossed his arms, "So it's girl problems?"

"Retz problems." Gon grumbled.

"Okay, talk to me."

Gon let out a long breath. "It's not bad. She's just been keeping me up these past few nights talking. She gets really upset when I go to bed early and I feel guilty."

"So? You aren't responsible for her, Gon. You haven't even started dating yet." Killua rolled his eyes, attempting to not seem concerned out of his mind.

"Well I'm responsible for you, and we aren't dating."  Gon giggled, poking a finger at Killua's cheek.

Killua jokingly slapped his hand away, half laughing, half embarrassed. "Okay, okay, first of all, you are not responsible for me. And second of all, this is so different and you know it."

"Yeah, I know." Gon giggled, "I like being responsible for you."

"I literally just told you—nevermind—you're getting distracted."

"Sorry."

"Don't be. Anyway. You can't keep staying past untimely hours just to make her happy, your math grade is already suffering." Killua scolded, "I won't survive another break of you being stuck in summer school, we're supposed to graduate together."

Gon pursed his lips, "I guess you're right. I'll try to be more firm with her."

Killua grinned, his tone turning mischievous, "if you don't. I can always do it for you."

"For sure." He laughed sarcastically, before he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. "Oh, speaking of, she just texted me."

"Do you want to talk to her?"

"Mm, not really, I kind of just want to be with you." Gon confessed.

"Then put your phone away." Killua spoke firmly.

"I should probably text her back." Gon mumbled, ignoring Killua's words and unlocking his phone, before Killua oh so suddenly snatched it out of his hand.

"Killua!" Gon yelped.

"I'm not gonna let you text her if you don't want to." Killua shot back, pocketing the phone with one hand and pushing Gon(who was desperately reaching for his phone back), with the other.

"Killuaaaa," he dragged, "pleaseee."

Killua shook his head.

"Ugh, I would totally beat the crap out of you for my phone right now. If I wasn't so tired." Gon sighed in defeat, giving up on trying to grab his phone back.

"Sure. You couldn't beat me in a fight even if you were fully rested."

"Whatever you wanna believe." He rolled his eyes, shifting himself onto Killua, his head resting in Killua's lap.

Killua tensed up for a second, then adjusted to the sudden affection. Gon knew Killua was sometimes a little shy with him, so he brushed it off. Killua repositioned his hands to where they were resting on the cold ground.

"Anyway.. thank you for always listening to me, Killua. Even when my problems are kind of stupid." Gon admitted.

"They aren't stupid. They bother you..so..obviously I want to help." Killua rolled his eyes with a subtle smile tugging at his lips. Gon noticed, responding with his own 'stupid-in-love' smile. Platonically. Of course.

"You're so considerate, Killua," Gon purred, then, out of nowhere, he said: "if I was a girl, I'd definitely want a boyfriend like you."

Killua paused for a moment, then rolled his eyes, "I wouldn't even want you if you were a girl."

"Just saying." Gon shrugged. Killua let out a short laugh, more like an exhale.

"Can you braid my hair?" Gon requested, closing his eyes.

"Your hair is too short." He opposed.

"Oh please." Gon scoffed, "That's an excuse. My hair is plenty long enough."

After a long pause, Killua finally relented, putting his hands into Gon's hair. He grabbed a thick piece and separated it into three smaller sections, beginning the braid. Gon relaxed, feeling the brush of Killua's soft fingertips at his forehead.

Killua rolled his eyes, "you're so annoying."

"And you're sweet." Gon smiled, keeping his eyes closed.

"Hm, maybe a little."

Gon laughed, but didn't say more in order to let Killua focus on his hair.

After a long while, Killua stopped at last. He ruffled his fingers through Gon's hair, separating all of the braids he had just carefully planted.

"My fingers are tired."

"Thanks, it felt nice. I haven't been this relaxed in a while." Gon admitted.

"It's.. no problem." Killua muttered.

Gon opened his eyes for a moment to look at Killua, who was now looking anywhere but Gon. He smiled and closed them again, feeling Killua's eyes return back to him.

"I wish I could feel this way when I'm with Retz, or anyone that isn't you, to be honest." Gon said, his voice almost low, and his cheeks fainting pink.

Killua looked at him, his own cheeks slightly reddening. Unbeknownst to Gon. Killua had a puzzled look on his face.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He mumbled.

"I dunno how to explain it. It's kind of like, I feel secure around you, y'know? Like I don't have to pretend, and I don't have to worry about you judging me."

"Oh.. um—I guess I feel the same way." Killua admitted.

Gon smiled, "I love you a lot, Killua. You're my best friend."

Killua tensed, the impact of the word hitting him like a wrecking ball.

"Uh, yeah, I love you too, man."

"Wanna know what I'm thinking?" Gon asked.

"Sure." Killua shrugged.

"The four of us should all go on a date! Y'know, like a double date." Gon suggested.

"Sounds stupid."

"Why? It would give me a chance to be better around Retz, since you'd be there. And maybe you and Kenji could patch things up? I know you really liked him." Gon explained.

"I guess. If you really want to, fine." Killua succumbed.

Gon didn't reply, he just continued smiling, his head laying comfortably in Killua's lap.

The sunset had began setting in, painting the skies with various shades of orange and pink. The clouds were low, barely even visible. Everything felt slower, even the usual rapid sound of rushing water had quieted. The atmosphere felt peaceful.

Killua felt calm, letting the soft winds tussle his hair. He looked down at his best friend, who had fallen asleep. He would have to wake him later, unfortunately for Killua, who was enjoying this more than he should. It brought him a little guilt, thinking about Kenji.

Still, he brushed it off. They were just being affectionate with each other. Nothing more. He smiled.

Until the silence was broken, a loud buzz coming from Killua's phone. He quickly grabbed it, silencing it before Gon had the chance to wake up.

Illumi was calling him, and Killua knew why.

Because when he told Gon he had texted Illumi, he was lying, he just didn't want Gon to worry. He didn't feel like dealing with Illumi's complaints earlier, but now he would be forced to. Considering Illumi knew where Killua was hiding out, and could have come by and dragged him back home whenever he pleased.

He reluctantly clicked the green answer button, "What do you want? I can't talk right now."

"Where are you?"

"I'm sleeping over at Gon's house."

A short pause, then, "who gave you permission?"

"It doesn't matter if I'm home or not. It's not like I have anything to do." Killua scoffed.

"That doesn't mean you can run off places and not tell anyone."

"Sorry." Killua forced out.

"Mother and Father would be upset." Illumi said sternly.

"So? It's not like they're even back home yet. I haven't even heard from them since they left for their business trip."

"That's because you don't answer their calls."

"Same difference." Killua sassed.

"Okay. I'm letting you off the hook. Just this once. Don't let it happen again."

"Whatever. Bye." Killua rolled his eyes, ending the call before Illumi could get another word in.

He checked the time,

8:32pm

"I should probably wake Gon before Mito comes here and drags us home by our ears." Killua whispered to himself, shaking Gon gently.

"Gon." He spoke, louder now.

"Mmm, what's up Killua?" Gon mumbled groggily.

"Let's head home, okay?"

"I'm too comfortable to move." He whined, "Carry me?" Gon asked sweetly, attempting his best to hide the absolute shit-eating grin plastered on his face. He knew Killua would give in.

"You're seriously too much, Gon." He sighed, rubbing his eyes, but complying with his request, scooping Gon up onto his back. Gon rested his head on Killua's shoulder, letting his smile appear freely now. Killua smiled too.

Chapter Text

Killua grunted as he hoisted the blanket up, sprawling it across the entire air mattress next to Gon's twin-sized bed. Once he was done, he flopped down onto it. He felt the warm steam still lingering around his skin from the shower he had just taken. He was shirtless, wearing only a fresh pair of boxers and grey sweatpants.

Gon was in the bathroom, spitting his toothpaste in the sink. Killua watched him for a moment, before flipping onto his stomach and whipping out his phone, scrolling through social media. He put it down when Mito peeked inside the door.

"Goodnight you two, don't stay up too late, okay?" She said softly.

"Goodnight Aunt Mito!" Gon called from inside the bathroom, "goodnight." Killua smiled.

"And don't make too much noise, I have to be up early tomorrow, you boys know just as much as I do how busy the bakery gets on Saturdays."

Killua nodded, Gon showed a brisk thumbs up from the bathroom.

Mito stepped back and closed the door, the sounds of her footsteps fading away as she went into her own room.

As Gon finished up his time in the bathroom, Killua's phone buzzed twice.

An image from Shizuku, weird, and a text message from Kenji.

He opened Kenji's text first. It read,

"please baby I'm so sorry I don't know how it happened I told her not to show you because I knew you'd be mad but I promise it was an accident we're so drunk right now!!!!!"

Killua raised an eyebrow in confusion, the fuck was he talking about?

He decided not to respond yet, coming to the conclusion that whatever Kenji was talking about must of had something to do with what Shizuku had sent him. So he opened Shizuku's message.

His heart should have dropped right out of his ass. But it didn't. Not really. He just had a flow of disappointment rush through his body. A singular tear ran down his left cheek, down onto his knees which he had brought up to his chest.

The picture revealed Kenji and Shalnark. They laid together, sprawled across the couch, shirtless. Kenji was on top of him, their faces smushed together, clearly indulging in a very passionate kiss. Very different from how he would usually kiss Killua.

Killua just stared at the image. Not saying anything as Gon came out of the bathroom and grabbed a pair of clean boxers, a black t-shirt, and green basketball shorts, changing into them.

Then, another message came from Kenji. And another. Then a third.

11:17 kenji: fine maybe it was on purpose but maybe it's because you never want to fucking spend any time with me selfish asshole
11:17 kenji: you only ever want to fuck around with Gon fuck honestly your probably fucking him behind my back aren't you
11:18 kenji: you're giving him it real good right now huh???? Is that why you're not responding???? Fuck you

Killua stared at the messages, a blank expression inhabited his face. He still didn't respond, instead, he blocked him with an unusual loss of hesitation.

He wiped the trace of the previous tear he shed off of his cheek and tossed his phone aside. Gon glanced over at him as he pulled his shirt over his head.

"Killua? What's up? You look weird." Gon asked casually, not expecting anything to actually be wrong.

Killua was broken out of his trance, he looked up at Gon, "huh?"

"I asked what was up?"

"Oh, uh. I got a message from Shizuku, and um, Kenji." Killua managed to speak, little to no tremble in his voice.

"What'd they say?" He asked, sitting down on the air mattress right in front of Killua.

"Shizuku sent me a picture."

Gon tilted his head, "Of?"

"Kenji..and.. Shalnark. Kissing." Killua said, almost monotonously, as if he didn't care.

"Oh, my god." Gon raised his hand over his mouth.

"Yeah. And then Kenji attempted to apologize, then accused me of having sex with you behind his back."

"Holy shit."

Silence.

"Are you okay?" Gon asked, genuine concern filling his tone and face.

"Honestly, kind of? I mean—at least I don't have to sit around waiting for him to break up with me now, I guess? I'm just kind of embarrassed." Killua admitted.

"Embarrassed? Why would you be embarrassed?"

"I got cheated on? That's kind of embarrassing." Killua chuckled.

"If anything, Kenji should be the one that's embarrassed." Gon declared.

"Hm? Why's that?"

"Because he cheated on you. Any guy would be lucky to go out with you, and he just blew it!" Gon cried.

Killua choked, seemingly on nothing. "Gon—you're being embarrassing. It's not that serious."

"It's true." Gon stated.

"I guess. I dunno. Whatever, I don't really care either way."

"Do you want to watch bird box?" Gon offered, pulling out his computer from the drawer next to them.

Killua laughed, "You hate bird box."

"But I love you, and you're upset because of some asshole, so we should watch your favorite movie." Gon grinned.

"Pfft, okay, Gon. Put it on."

"Okay!"

Thirty minutes into the movie, Gon had already fallen asleep. And Killua wasn't by any means surprised.

Despite bird box being Killua's favorite movie, he paused it, closed the laptop, and tucked it back into Gon's bedside drawer.

He laid back down next to Gon, too nice to wake him up, and too lazy to carry him onto his own bed.

Killua kept still, lying flat on his back and looking up blankly at the ceiling. He thought about Kenji. Not so much about how he had quite literally just been cheated on, but he more so thought about what he had said.

More specifically, what he had said about Killua and Gon. It made him think about his and Gon's relationship. It was purely platonic, of course. Kenji was just a jealous asshole.

Sure, Gon and Killua had been each other's first kiss. A practice kiss, really, when Gon had gotten his first girlfriend in seventh grade and was extremely nervous about kissing her.

Killua just offered his help and feedback, being the selfless best friend he always had been.

And yeah, maybe they had practiced flirting with each other. But it's not like they were really flirting with each other. Just practicing.

Killua slapped a hand to his forehead, he was thinking about stupid things. He needed to get to sleep, his mind always seemed to go to weird places at these hours of the night.

He closed his eyes tightly, and eventually drifted off to sleep, his head so close to Gon's that their cheeks were lightly touching.

The next morning, Killua woke up to a missing Gon, and an absolutely mouth watering smell traveling through the open door, directly into his nose. He raised his arms over his head in a quick stretch, then got up and made his way down the stairs, the smell hitting him even harder now. The sound of Gon's singing and some song Killua's never heard of filled his ears, growing louder and louder every step he took.

In the kitchen, he saw Gon, who was frying a whole pack of bacon on one pan, and cooking four eggs on the other. Along with a fresh stack of pancakes on the counter next to him. Gon had clearly already dressed into his day clothes.

He wore an oversized, plain, black hoodie with the sleeves rolled up, dark blue Jorts that stopped just right above his knees, and white ankle socks.

Killua walked down the last step, stopping right behind Gon, resting his still half-sleeping head on Gon's shoulder. Which was a little uncomfortable, considering Gon being a good whopping four inches shorter than him, but he didn't care.

Gon just laughed in response, "Morning, Killua."

"Morning. Mmm, what're you making?" Killua mumbled, his voice still low and raspy from his slumber.

"Breakfast. I just finished the pancakes, the bacon and eggs will be done in five minutes. But you can start eating the pancakes now if you want."

Killua straightened back up, walking back behind the counter and sitting down in one of the stools. "Wow, I'm so lucky. When did you have time to make all of this?"

"Well, it is ten. I woke up like, two hours ago. I've had plenty of time." Gon laughed.

Killua rested his head in his hand, "Two hours to make pancakes from scratch? Jeez, maybe I take back what I said about your baking skills."

"It's not that hard. I could teach you if you want."

"Mm, okay. Pass me the pancakes? And maybe some syrup, please?" Killua asked in a sweet tone.

Gon rolled his eyes, "you want me to spoon feed you too, princess?"

"That'd be perfect. Thank you." Killua laughed sarcastically as Gon passed him a plate of two pancakes, along with a fork and a bottle of maple syrup.

"You want anything to drink?" Gon asked, flipping a few pieces of bacon to the other side with a knife. Although, he already knew exactly what Killua would say.

"Chocolate milk?"

"Knew it." Gon laughed, straying his attention from the pan to the fridge, pulling out the bottle of chocolate milk and pouring it into a small glass for Killua.

"You're the best." Killua smiled, taking a big bite of his pancakes, downing it with a big sip of the chocolate milk.

Gon continued flipping bacon, then he went over and moved the eggs onto another large plate, "I know."

"Anyway, did Mito leave for the bakery already?" Killua asked, his words slurred due to his mouth full of food.

Gon nodded, switching off the stove and flipping the bacon onto the plate, right next to the eggs, "She left right when I woke up, yeah. We might have to run to the store later and pick some stuff up for her, though. She texted me not that long ago to tell me."

"Oh, sure." Killua responded.

"I talked to Retz today." Gon said casually.

"Yeah? That's good, I think."

"It is."

Gon's voice turned hesitant when he spoke again, "Anyway..are you—are you, y'know, okay?"

"Hm? Yeah, sure, without Kenji I just get to spend more time with you without having to explain myself every ten minutes." Killua laughed, rolling his eyes as he took another bite.

"That's good." Gon smiled, staring at Killua as he ate with a genuine look in his eye. Killua looked up and noticed, immediately looking back down and shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Gon continued to stare.

"What?" Killua grumbled.

"Nothing. Your hair looks funny when you wake up. You look like you just got electrocuted." Gon giggled.

"Horrible comparison. I think I look adorable when I wake up." Killua rolled his eyes and finished the last bite of food on his plate. "Aren't you gonna eat?"

Gon shook his head, "I already ate. Before you woke up. Plus, I don't like eggs."

"There's pancakes."

"They're all for you."

"Whatever, I'm full now." Killua got up, walking to rinse his plate in the sink.

"Just leave it there, I'll do the dishes later." Gon insisted.

Killua nodded and did just that.

"Are you sleeping over again tonight?"

"Probably not. Alluka should be heading home today, her and Kalluto are gonna be pretty upset if I don't spend some time with them tomorrow." He replied.

"Oh, sure. Can we go outside now, then?"

Killua shrugged, "where to?"

"I dunno. Maybe Fro-Yo and then we can go help Mito down at the bakery?" Gon proposed.

"Sure, let me just go get changed really quick, yeah?" Killua replied, rushing back up the stairs before Gon got a chance to respond.

He grabbed his backpack, pulling out a plain tight fitting black t-shirt, and a pair of blue basketball shorts. He put both on, then he sat on the bed and pulled his socks on. He grabbed a pair of black, thick rimmed sunglasses, and rested them atop his head.

When he finished, he speed walked back down the stairs, where Gon was finishing cleaning up the kitchen.

He looked up at Killua, smiling, "Are you ready to go? You look cool."

Killua shied away from the compliment, looking away for a second, "Thanks. And yeah, you?"

"Yep! Let me just grab my wallet and keys, then we can go."

"Sure."

Chapter Text

Killua watched as Gon locked the door, attempting to twist open the door knob to make sure it really did lock.

"Okay, we're good. Let's go."

"Are we walking?" Killua complained.

Gon laughed, grabbing Killua's hand and pulling him along, "If you want froyo we need some exercise! Plus, it's like, a five minute walk at most, drama queen."

Killua grumbled something under his breath, but let Gon lead him ahead.

Gon in fact, did not lie. The walk was a brisk five minutes, and it was quite pleasant. The wind was chilly, but the heat of the sun balanced it out, making it the absolute perfect weather. In Gon's opinion, anyway. Killua's too.

They walked inside the Fro-Yo shop, the bell ringing behind them as the door closed. The cashier glanced up at them, and flashed a quick smile, before returning to her cleaning.

They both grabbed a cup and began observing the flavors carefully. Eventually, they both agreed to get all six flavors, three each, so they could try them all.

Gon got Vanilla Snow, Pistachio Gelato, and Pecan Praline, loading them up evenly in his cup, as evenly as he could anyway. Killua did the same, except with Cake Batter, Cookies and Cream, and Original Tart.

"Okay, I finished making mine." Gon said.

"Uh, where are your toppings?" Killua asked.

"I don't get toppings on my Fro-Yo?" Gon responded, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"How did I not know this? You're insane." Killua cried, genuine shock in his voice.

"Whatever, just hurry up so I can pay."

"So you can pay?"

Gon rolled his eyes and laughed, "Yeah, I'm paying for you."

"If you say so." Killua snickered, making his way toward the toppings section.

He began loading various toppings into his cup, trying to fit as much as possible without any spilling out. He ended up getting brownie bites, strawberry bursting boba, lots of rainbow sprinkles, chocolate chips, gummy bears, and loads of other sugary candies Gon couldn't even begin to name.

"Christ. This is just diabetes awaiting." He mumbled, pulling out his wallet as the woman behind the counter weighed both their cups.

"Don't judge me, I just got cheated on. I'm sensitive." Killua said, putting a hand on his heart to act offended.

"Uh-huh." Gon rolled his eyes and smiled, reluctantly.

"That'll be twenty dollars and sixty-five scents." The cashier announced.

"Sure." Gon replied, digging around in his wallet for a twenty and a one dollar bill, handing it to the young woman.

She tapped on the machine screen a couple times, before opening up the register and placing the money inside, grabbing Gon's change. She handed it to him, then shifted her gaze to Killua.

"I think you go to my friends school? You're Killua, right?" She asked.

"Uhh, yeah I am. So?" Killua raised an eyebrow, Gon watched without saying a word.

"Oh, nothing, I was just wondering if I could perhaps get your number? Since.. I heard you saying you got cheated on." She chuckled nervously.

"I did say that. But I'm unfortunately very gay, sorry." Killua replied, rubbing his arm awkwardly.

"Oh! I'm sorry! Are you two out on a date, then?"

"Yep! Have a nice day!" Gon answered for Killua, before grabbing their cups, Killua's arm, and rushing out the door without even glancing at the cashiers shocked face. They speed walked down the road to the empty benches ahead, sitting down.

"Um—what was that?" Killua asked, his cheeks slightly flushed.

"Haha, sorry, that was just so awkward. I couldn't watch anymore, and I know you can't end conversations." Gon laughed, taking a spoonful of Pistachio Gelato and putting it in his mouth.

"Okay. Rude. Anyway, how's that taste?"

"Pretty good. Here, try some." Gon took another spoonful of the same flavor, pressing it to Killua's lips. Killua parted his lips, letting Gon feed him the spoon of frozen yogurt.

"Idiot. I can feed myself." Killua rolled his eyes, "But that was pretty good. Wanna try mine?"

"Sure!" Gon opened his mouth, and Killua put the spoonful of Cake Batter in his mouth.

"Mmm, that's really good. I can barely taste it because of all that other crap you loaded on there, though." Gon teased.

"Like yours is any better, you didn't even get sprinkles!" Killua cried.

"I was just kidding! Don't judge me for my preferences!"

Killua just giggled in response, taking another spoonful of froyo in his mouth. They kept eating in silence, Gon finishing quickly considering the much smaller amount of fro-yo he had in his cup, compared to Killua and his chronic sweet tooth.

Gon scooted closer to him, taking out his phone and opening the camera app. He snapped a picture of the two of them, catching Killua off guard as he shoveled fro-yo into his mouth, staring directly at the camera, eyes wide.

"Gon. I swear, if you post that, I will snap your phone in half." Killua threatened, the fro-yo dirtying his chin.

"Okay, okay! Let's take another one, then?" Gon suggested.

"Fine. Give me a second." Killua gave in, wiping his chin and fixing his hair in the camera. "Okay, I'm good now."

Gon adjusted the camera closer to their faces, he took his other hand and grabbed Killua's face, cupping it from his chin and pressing his own cheek against Killua's.

"Gon—what are you doing? This looks stupid." Killua asked, his voice muffled from Gon holding his cheeks.

"Please? This looks cute!" Gon begged.

"Cute? Fine. Hurry, my face hurts."

Gon smiled and looked into the camera, quickly taking the picture, then let go of Killua's face. He looked at the picture, giggling.

"Okay, now one of just you." He said.

"Of just me? Why?" Killua questioned.

"For the instagram post I'll be making later, obviously." Gon rolled his eyes, "now pose, okay?"

"Gosh, you're so stupid." Killua grumbled, but reluctantly, set his spoon down in the cup and smiled, making peace signs with both his hands.

Gon snapped the picture, then took a second to look at it. "You look pretty."

"Wow, you sure know how to make a girl feel special." Killua joked, his tone full of sarcasm.

Gon's phone buzzed, "speaking of."

"What? Retz?" Killua raised an eyebrow.

Gon shook his head, "Uh-uh, Mito, she wants us to run to the store and grab some stuff for her, she said she needs it in the next hour."

Killua finished the last spoonful, throwing his cup away into the trash next to them. "Sure, let's go then."

"'Kay." Gon replied, following Killua, while becoming engrossed in his phone.

Killua looked back, "What are you doing?"

"I'm posting the pictures." Gon answered, still not looking up.

"Now? Can't you wait?"

"No, I'll forget later."

"Ugh, okay, come on. At least try to keep up." Killua rolled his eyes, grabbing Gon by his one free hand and pulling him along.

Gon posted the picture of them, the picture of Killua, and another picture of both their fro-yo cups side by side. Captioning the post and tagging Killua,
'fro-yo date with killua 🍦💐 @not.killua'

Gon then pocketed his phone, picking up his pace to where he was walking side by side with Killua,

"Killua, go like it, and comment."

"Can't I do that later?"

"It'll look stupid if other people see I tagged you and you didn't even like it!" Gon cried, attempting to make his point.

"Ugh, fine, make sure I don't run into a wall or something." Killua grumbled, pulling out his phone, raising an eyebrow at the caption. "Fro-yo date with Killua? Gon, people are gonna take this the wrong way."

"Why would they?" Gon asked, now being the one who was leading Killua down the side walk.

"Uh, maybe because I'm gay, and maybe because me and Kenji just broke up?"

"If they take it the wrong way just because you're gay, they're weird, and their opinion doesn't matter."

"Pfft, okay, whatever. And why'd you use the ice cream emoji? We had fro-yo." Killua teased

"There's no fro-yo emoji!" Gon cried.

Killua just smiled, he liked the post and commented, "he forced me to go with him plz send help"

He snickered to himself, thinking of the comment as the epitome of comedy, pocketing his phone and letting his arm loose from Gon.

After a brisk eight minute walk, they made it to the local super-market. Killua grabbed a cart and they both walked inside the store.

"Okay, what's the first thing we need?" Killua asked.

"Let me check," Gon unlocked his phone and glanced over the list Mito had sent him, "the first thing on hereee..isss... all-purpose flower."

"Right, lead the way then." Killua declared, following Gon through the busy store.

When they entered the baking aisle, Gon immediately noticed a blonde girl looking at brownie mix, running up to her and striking up a conversation. Killua watched in confusion for a moment, before realizing, to his utter despair, that the girl was Retz. He rolled his eyes and walked up to the two of them.

Retz had her long blonde hair up into a high ponytail, a couple strands poking out, framing her face. She wore a blue denim skirt, along with white sneakers and a white off-shoulder cashmere sweater.

"Hi. Retz." Killua greeted, little to no emotion in his voice.

"Hi." She replied, smiling and tucking a few of the stray strands behind her ear.

"Retz was asking if she could tag along with us, since she has plans to head over to Mito's bakery later anyway, is that fine?" Gon asked, giving Killua a look that said 'please please please'.

"Yeah, I don't mind," Killua shrugged, "but why are you going to the bakery?"

"My older brothers birthday is coming up soon, and I need to place an order with miss Mito for a cake." Retz replied, "I actually came here to get some brownie mix, y'know, for the party."

"That's cool! This is actually pretty convenient," Gon admitted, grabbing the cart from Killua, "you two can grab all the things on the list while I read it off to you!"

"Sure!" Retz confirmed. Killua nodded in response, grabbing a bag of all-purpose flower and tossing it into the cart.

"Great! Okay, the next issss... granulated sugar, and vanilla extract. Both should be in this aisle."

Killua and Retz shot each other a challenging look, before both launching themselves toward the direction of the granulated sugar, almost fighting over who would get the chance to retrieve it for Gon. Unfortunately for Killua, Retz managed to snatch it first and drop it into the cart. Killua mumbled something under his breath, then took his opportunity, reaching for the vanilla extract and putting it in the cart.

The trio walked into the dairy aisle, and as Gon continued listing items, their unspoken, unofficial fight continued.

After a couple of times, Gon finally began to catch onto the silent tension surrounding the two. "Um. Are you guys, okay?"

"We're fine." Killua answered for both of them, his tone broadcasting the fact they were very much not fine.

"Uh, okay. Anyway, we should be done. Unless there's anything you wanted to bring back to my house, Killua?"

Before Killua could answer yes or no, Retz cut in, "Why would Killua be buying things to keep at your house?"

"Because I'm like, always over there, practically live there." Killua bragged, responding in replacement of Gon, the proud look on his face caused Retz to cross her arms.

"Oh. Cool, I guess." She huffed.

Gon reached for his phone, checking the time, "So, can we get going? Mito probably needs all this stuff by now, and we still have to walk all the way over there."

Killua and Retz nodded, following Gon to the checkout lane, helping him unload all of the products onto the checkout conveyor belt.

Retz indulged in some brisk small-talk with the cashier as Gon swiped his card into the reader. Killua grabbed a hold of the cart and already began walking out, Gon and Retz following further behind.

Once they got outside of the store, Gon and Killua began grabbing all of the bags out of the shopping cart.

"Do you guys need me to carry anything?" Retz offered.

Gon shook his head, "Don't worry! The bakery is like, three minutes away, we can manage until then. Right, Killua?"

"Actually—"

Gon elbowed him in the side, stopping Killua mid sentence.

"Uh. Right." He mumbled.

The next three minutes consisted of Killua complaining about how heavy the bags were, Gon responding with something along the lines of  'put all those hours you spend at the gym to work', and Retz laughing at said stupid comments.

Finally, they made it inside the bakery. The place was busier than usual, every stool at the counter was taken, and about eight out of eleven tables were full of people.

Retz stayed behind in the main area, while Gon and Killua went into the back kitchen to drop off the groceries for Mito.

"Oh, I couldn't thank you boys enough!" Mito cried, quickly taking out the gallon of milk and pouring some into a mysterious mixture on the counter.

"It's no problem, really!" Gon assured, "yeah, we didn't have anything better to do, anyway." Killua added.

"You two are the best, I don't need anything else, you can go back to doing whatever it was you were before I called for you." She smiled, going back to fully focusing on the mixture.

The boys nodded, then returned back to the main bakery, where Retz waited for them, a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Honestly, Gon! You're so sweet, doing all this for your aunt." She cooed.

"Yeah, I guess. Killua helped too!"

"Well—yeah—you know what I mean." Retz stuttered, finishing her words with an awkward laugh

Killua turned his head and rolled his eyes, "Yeah. I should probably head home now."

"Aw, Killua. Why so early?" Gon whined.

"You'll be fine. Retz is here, you guys have fun. Plus, if I don't head back now, Illumi will probably have my head on a stick in the next hour or so." Killua laughed, patting his hand on Gon's shoulder.

"Okay. Text me when you get home so I know you got there safe?"

Retz rolled her eyes at the request, out of Gon's sight, but definitely in Killua's.

"I will. Bye Gon, bye Retz."

"Bye, see you Monday!" Retz waved as Killua walked out the door, the bell chiming behind him.

Killua's walk home was a grand total of twenty minutes, which is longer than it usually takes from Mito's bakery. But to be fair, he was scrolling through his phone basically the whole time, causing him to stumble over his own feet from time to time.

He jammed his keys into the door, then pulled it open. Alluka and Kalluto sat on the couch seemingly unfazed by Killua's arrival, and Illumi was sat at the dining table, scanning over some paperwork Killua couldn't care less about.

"Wow, are you guys not gonna greet your big brother?" Killua teased, ruffling his hands through both his younger siblings hair.

"Shhh! We're watching our show!" Alluka shushed, Killua playfully shoved her head forward, laughing.

Illumi finally managed to unglue his eyes from the work in front of him, and was now looking up at Killua.

"You're home."

"Yep."

"Anything interesting happened?" Illumi asked, lacking genuine interest in his tone as he shifted his gaze back down at the pile of papers.

"Uh, well, my boyfriend cheated on me. So. There's that." Killua shrugged casually, as if he wasn't talking about something that would have been a heart wrenching experience for anybody else.

"That's a shame. Kenji was nice, distinguished. Unlike that wild card friend of yours."

"Like you even know anything." Killua hissed, slipping off his shoes and stomping up the stairs into his room.

He flopped down on his bed, not bothering to change out of his outside clothes before hand. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, he sent Gon a quick text message reading: 'hey, I got home alright. lmk what happens with retz ok? u better text me as soon as ur alone.'

He wished he had still been with Gon. But he knew Gon would want some alone time with Retz, and he wasn't going to be selfish with Gon of all people. The same Gon that would give his heart and soul just to make Killua happy. Plus, it was better he had gone home, anyway, all the less drama he would of had to sift through with Illumi if he had stayed longer.

He sighed, grabbing the remote control from his nightstand and switching on the TV.

"I wonder what they're up to." Killua whispered, to no one in particular.

Chapter Text

     The repeated sound of Alluka saying his name while shaking him awake was the first thing Killua heard Sunday morning.

"Killua, Killuaaaa."

Killua opened his eyes, blinking a couple times to get used to the sunlight that was peering in through the window, now directly into his tired eyes.

"Mmh, Alluka, why are you waking me up so early?" He yawned, stretching his arms over his head lazily.

"Uh, it's like, eleven. If you don't wake up now, you won't be able to go to sleep tonight." She rolled her eyes.

"Oh, yeah, I guess."

"Anyway.. the real reason I'm waking you up is... cause Kenji texted me a couple times this morning." Alluka muttered hesitantly.

Killua's brain was now fully awake, he laughed nervously, "Oh—did he? Um. What'd he say?"

Alluka's expression turned serious, "I know he did something Killua. But I wanted to hear it from you." She stated firmly.

He now sat up in his bed. Killua's eyes didn't meet her gaze, instead he stared down at his blankets in silence.

"You can talk to me, you know that right?" Alluka assured.

"Yeah, I know."

"Okay. So?"

"It's not important, we just broke up over something stupid. I don't really care anyway." Killua shrugged.

"I know that's not true." Alluka grumbled, growing impatient.

Killua ran his fingers through his hair, "Well then you're wrong. Because it is true."

"Killua. I know I won't stop bugging you until you tell me, you know I won't stop bugging you until you tell me. You're just wasting time being stubborn."

Killua sighed. He knew Alluka wasn't lying, she always got her way when it came to things like these. But how could he talk to her about this? He didn't even know how he really felt about it all. It's not like Alluka would understand, anyway, despite being just a year younger than Killua, she's never even liked anyone, let alone been in a relationship.

"Okay. Fine. Just promise me you won't try to text him after this, I want you to block his number." Killua mumbled, accepting defeat.

"Deal!"

"Okay... um.. where to start." He spoke skittishly, "So, uh, on Friday. There was a party, Kenji's friends were hosting."

"Uh-huh?" She nodded eagerly.

"And.. Kenji invited me, but I didn't really want to go, and I told him I was gonna be busy with Gon for the whole day."

"Okay."

"And then..later—when I was getting ready for bed at Gon's house—I got a message from him.. and one of his friends." Killua hesitated.

"What did it say?"

"Uh, well, I opened Kenji's first. He was telling me about some accident, or whatever. I was really confused on what he was talking about."

Alluka tilted her head in confusion.

Killua's voice trembled for a moment, "Then I opened his friend's message.. and.. it was a picture of him, with another guy."

"What do you mean?"

"Uh, well, all in all, he cheated on me." Killua fidgeted with the sleeves of his hoodie.

Her eyes suddenly grew softer, and more genuine, "Oh, big brother. I'm so sorry. How do you feel?"

"I..I don't really care, honestly. I knew we were going to shit, anyway. So it's not like it came as a surprise." He shrugged.

"You don't care at all that you just got cheated on?" She crossed her arms, "I'm not buying it."

Killua waved his hands in the air defensively, "I'm fine. I have you. I have Kalluto. And I have Gon. The only three I'll ever need."

"Does Gon know what happened?"

"Of course Gon knows what happened." Killua forced a laugh.

"What'd he say about it?" She asked.

Killua laid back down against his headboard, throwing his arm behind his head, resting comfortably on them. "Not much. I didn't wanna dwell too much on it. He's got his own problems."

"Oh? What's going on with him?"

"Why are you so nosy today?"

"Fine, forget I asked!" She scoffed, standing up.

Killua laughed, "I'm just messing with you. Sit back down."

Alluka pouted, giving him an annoyed look, but eventually complied.

"Gon's seeing this girl, kind of, and he's just having some problems." Killua shrugged.

Her expression softened once again, "Really?"

"Yeah, I guess she's some obsessed weirdo, from my point of view, anyway." Killua scoffed, "she never stops talking to him!"

"Kind of sounds like you." Alluka giggled.

Killua furrowed his eyebrows, "Excuse you. Not at all, if anything, Gon's the one who's obsessed with me."

"I think you two are equally obsessed. All you do is talk about each other."

"Yeah, whatever, anyway, then he said something about how he wishes he could feel the same way with her as he does around me." Killua shrugged, then smiled, "God, he's so sappy." He giggled like a little girl with a crush.

"Aw, Killua. Sounds like he loves you a lot." She cooed.

"Gon? Yeah, 'course he loves me, we're best friends aren't we?"

"Uh. Well, yeah. But that's not what I meant." Alluka chuckled.

Killua raised an eyebrow, signaling her to elaborate.

"What I meant is, it sounds like he's in love. With you."

Killua's eyes widened, his cheeks suddenly reddening, "what—I think you're confused.. Gon's not in love with me. He's in love with Retz."

Alluka rolled her eyes, "Okay, then, if you think that. Walk me through exactly what happened before and after he said all that stuff to you."

"No. Because I know what it's gonna sound like." Killua grumbled.

"See! I knew it! You're in love with him! And he's in love with you!" She cried.

Killua suddenly stood up, hands on his hips. "You're spouting a bunch of nonsense. Just drop it already." He hissed.

"Yeah? Fine! Talk to me when you're done being an oblivious idiot." She barked, storming out of his room and slamming the door shut behind her.

Killua groaned, dropping back down on his bed.

I mean, the idea of him and Gon couldn't completely be thrown out the window.

Wait a minute, what was he even thinking? Of course it could be thrown out the window. As a matter of fact, it definitely should be thrown out the window, off a cliff, burned, and completely removed from existence! It's just ridiculous.

Gon was completely, entirely, most definitely straight. No doubt about it, he had never expressed any sorts of romantic feelings towards another guy, let alone Killua.

But then again, he had never explicitly said he wasn't at the very least bisexual. Flashbacks of their memories together crowded Killua's mind as he foolishly tried to read into his and Gon's relationship.

"Okay, wait, how are we doing this?" Gon laughed nervously.

"Um, just like, put our lips together, I guess? I dunno. I've never kissed anyone before." Killua mumbled.

"You're no help! How am I supposed to practice kissing on someone who's never had a real kiss? Gosh, my girlfriend's gonna hate me."

"She's not gonna hate you for being a sloppy kisser, Jesus, just come here." Killua rolled his eyes, slamming his lips against Gon's.

Their teeth made contact first.

"ouch!" Gon cried, in between the kiss.

"Shit—sorry."

Then, they found their rhythm. They began sloppily making out, it wasn't perfect, but definitely not horrible.

"That..um.. wasn't too bad. Aside from my teeth cutting your lip." Killua admitted, laughing.

"I hope she thinks the same."

"All you think about is girls!" He shouted, throwing a pillow at Gon.

"Well, yeah! That is why we just kissed!" Gon shouted back, blocking the sudden attack to his head.

Killua rolled his eyes, laughing at his idiotic best friend.

Now, Killua slammed a pillow over his face and screamed into it, overwhelmed with all the thoughts suddenly swarming his brain.

"Damn you, Alluka!" He shouted, his voice no longer muffled by the pillow.

"Don't blame your screwed up love life on me!" She shouted back.

Killua rolled his eyes, slamming the pillow back over his face.

I wonder how Gon's holding up with Retz.

______

"You'll just absolutely love this place! Killua sure does." Gon assured, leading Retz by the hand, inside of the fro-yo shop he had visited with Killua just the day prior.

"It smells nice in here." She commented, following him to where the flavors were.

"I know right? Anyway, just grab a cup and put any flavors you want!" Gon instructed, "I personally recommend Pistachio Gelato, but to each their own."

"Okay, I will seriously take that into consideration." Retz giggled, grabbing a cup and taking a further look into the variety of flavors.

Gon ended up with a mix of pistachio gelato and cake batter, no toppings. Retz on the other hand, had only pistachio gelato, covered in rainbow sprinkles and Oreo bits. A weird combination, in Gon's humble opinion.

Gon happily paid for the both of them, then grabbed Retz by the hand once again as they walked to the outdoor seating. They sat down in the chairs across from each other.

"Hurry and try it! I want to hear your opinion." Gon insisted.

"Okay, okay, here I go." She laughed, grabbing a spoonful of fro-yo and putting it in her mouth.

She paused for a second, looking up, then raising her eyebrows approvingly. "Mmm, this is delicious!"

"Told 'ya! It's definitely the best flavor, hands down." He exclaimed proudly.

Retz placed her elbows on the table and rested her chin in her hands, "Mhm. Anyways, thanks for bringing me here. It's really sweet of you."

Gon licked the spoon clean, "Of course! I can't believe you've never had fro-yo before."

"I didn't know it was so popular, I've never heard anyone fanning over this stuff before." She shrugged.

"I guess it isn't that popular, it kind of is to me, though."

Retz raised an eyebrow, "Huh, why's that?"

"It's Killua's favorite dessert, like, ever. He never shuts up about it! It's so cute." Gon explained happily.

She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, tucking her hair behind her ear, with an awkward laugh, "Cute?"

Gon nodded, swallowing another spoonful of fro-yo.

"We are on a date, right?" Retz asked.

"Of course."

"Um, sorry, I don't know if I'm getting the wrong idea." She paused, hesitating to ask, "Are you and Killua, um, dating?"

Gon choked, setting his cup back down on the table, along with the spoon. "Oh, goodness no!! We're just really good friends."

"But, you just called him 'cute'."

"Ahh, sorry, I guess that does sound weird. But I promise there is absolutely nothing going on between me and Killua." Gon chuckled, rubbing the back of his head.

"Oh, okay, just wondering." She replied, her body relaxing.

"And uh, you? Any boyfriends? Or girlfriends..?" Gon asked, his tone hesitant.

She rolled her eyes playfully, "No. Obviously. I'm here with you. I wish I had a boyfriend."

"Oh, same."

"What?"

"Wait—not a boyfriend! I meant I wish I had a girlfriend. God, sorry." He slapped both hands over his face in embarrassment.

Retz giggled, "you're so funny, Gon. I think you're really cute."

"Oh, you think so?"

"Yeah, I have actually, for a while. I'm happy we're on a date, at last."

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?" He blurted.

Retz was stunned for a moment, not expecting the question so suddenly. Then she exploded into laughter. "Gosh, Gon! That's so, out of the blue!"

He fiddled with his fingers, embarrassment clouding his brain, "Sorry, I have a tendency to rush into things sometimes, you can say no." He admitted, laughing awkwardly for a bit.

"I didn't say that. Of course, I'd love to be your girlfriend."

"Really? Awesome!" He whooped, jumping out of his chair in excitement. "Can I show you this really cool place?"

"Uh, sure. Lead the way." She agreed, extending her arm out for Gon to hold.

They walked a few minutes down past Gon's house, all the way down to him and Killua's special spot. This was Gon's favorite time of all to visit. The sun had already began setting, and the flow of water was louder than usual. It was chilly due to the soft breeze, but the sun warmth of the sun blocked it out. The absolute perfect setting.

"Is this it?" She asked, little emotion in her tone.

"Yeah, isn't it beautiful here? This is my favorite place, like, of all time." Gon specified, admiring the scene before him.

"I guess, nothing out of the ordinary, though."

Gon turned his head to look at her, "Where do you like to go usually?"

"I dunno. I'm not a big outdoorsy person. I prefer quality time with my friends inside." Retz explained.

"Ah, makes sense. I'm pretty much the opposite, if you couldn't already tell." He chuckled.

"Yeah, I see you posting all of your pictures with Killua, you two are almost never inside it seems like."

"Yeah, haha, Killua." Gon fixated on the name, almost as if she had said nothing else but just that.

Again, he was struck with the same feeling. Nothing felt the same without Killua. Sure, Retz was nice, and pretty, but she was no Killua. Gon didn't know how to describe this feeling, but it upset him.

He didn't want to be dependent on Killua, he wanted to be able to put attention into his relationships. The lack of it was what had ended almost all of them, anyway.

Surely it was just because of how inseparable they had been these last couple of years.

Right?

They sat down next to eachother, Retz leaning against Gon as she rested her body against his.

She smiled, looking up at him, "We should go out again soon sometime, you're so fun to be with, I feel like I never know what's gonna happen next when I'm around you, you know?"

Gon smiled back at her, "Yeah, I'd love to go out again. With you."

Then, Retz looked up even higher, stopping directly at his face, causing Gon to turn his head and face her. They stared at each other for a moment, neither saying a word.

After a few seconds, Retz leaned in, in an attempt to plant a kiss on Gon's lip. Gon jumped up in surprise, and instead of their lips meeting, their teeth clashed together instead.

"Ouch!" She laughed, not awkwardly, but reassuringly.

"Sorry! You surprised me!" Gon cried.

"It's okay, I should have asked before kissing you, that's my fault." Retz smiled.

Gon smiled back. And the memories came rushing back to him, his and Retz' "first" kiss. It was almost just like their first kiss.

Chapter Text

That following Monday at school, Gon practically skipped into the classroom. On time, which pleased Killua very much so. He watched Gon with an amused look on his face as he happily took his seat.

"Morning, Killua!" He whistled.

Killua grinned, "Morning, Gon. What's got you in such a good mood today?"

"Mmm, not telling." He smiled, pressing a finger to his lips.

Killua raised an eyebrow as he pulled out his math packet and a pen, "uh, okay, weirdo."

"You're supposed to beg me to tell you! Killua!" Gon whined.

"Honestly, I don't really care that much." Killua spoke, spinning his pen around in between his fingers.

Gon pushed his bottom lip out, running a finger down his cheek to mock tears.

"Christ, fine, please Gon? Will you tell me why you're so happy?" He rolled his eyes, speaking in the most sarcastic tone he could make.

Gon grinned, "Nope."

"You are actually insufferable."

"I'm kidding! I'll tell you during lunch, it's super important." He winked.

Killua opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off as the first period bell rang, he decided not to say more as Mr. Wing began his lesson.

About ten minutes after, Gon nudged him in the side, then put a folded up piece of paper on his desk. Killua gave Gon a confused glance, but snatched up the paper regardless. He began unfolding it, realizing it was a little note.

In deep blue pen, it read,

ok I can’t wait anymore I need to tell u what happened

Or—Atleast, that’s what he thought it said, considering the writing was just barely legible.

Killua chuckled silently to himself, barely being able to read Gon's messy hand writing, he uncapped his pen and began writing back his own message in hot pink, a simple: ‘???’

He folded the paper back up and slid it onto Gon's desk. Which was Killua's first mistake. Because now, Killua was unaware that soon Gon wouldn't quit writing him notes.

When Killua opened Gon's second note, his breath hitched just for a moment.

I asked out Retz yesterday :)

Steadying his breathing, he gave Gon a glance out of the corner of his eyes, a smile plastering his face as he eagerly awaited Killua’s response.

Cool dude i’m assuming she said yes lmao

He passed the piece of paper back, Gon quickly scribbling another message, barely holding back his excitement.

She did!!!! How’d you know??

Killua rolled his eyes in amusement.

well u wouldn’t be this happy if she said no would u?

         idiot

He heard a quiet giggle escape Gon’s lips.

ohhhh right :P

At this point, Killua just assumed their conversation was over. So he just tossed the paper back onto Gon’s desk. Apparently, the two weren’t on the same page as Gon practically threw it right back.

whyd u give it back?

I want to keep taklng
talking

The handwriting was already barely legible, and Gon’s constant scrolling over stupid spelling errors only worsened the problem. That, and the fact that Killua had absolutely no interest in hearing about him and Retz’ newfound relationship any more than he already had to.

gon pay attention ur literally failing

Gon replied,

yeah i know but i’m just too excited and i really want to talk to u right now

It took Killua about, what, two minutes to read this one sentence? Christ, did he not learn handwriting in his second grade class?

I can barely even read ur handwriting anymore plz stop

Gon scribbled over the ‘barely even’, ‘anymore’, and replaced the ‘plz’ with ‘don’t’, making his previous statement into something completely different; I can read ur handwriting don’t stop.

He also added his own little message, chuckling silently the whole time, which was already enough of a warning sign for Killua.

aww ok killua ur so sweet

i hate u

A smug smile reappeared on Gon’s face as he uncapped his pen, replacing ‘hate’ with ‘love’, and of course, adding his own message as if he didn’t just change Killua’s.

I love you too man

He snickered, adding a quick doodle of him and Killua. They were holding hands, with a couple hearts, a smiley face, and an arrow pointing to the two of them captioned ‘us’.

When he passed the note to Killua, his grin only widened as he saw the embarrassed look on his friends face.

Killua, on the other hand, wasn’t letting this go on any further, and he knew how to make Gon stop dead in his tracks.

if u pass me another note I’m telling mito ur failing.

Killua smiled as he saw Gon's expression shift from smug to fearful.

"Please don't tell Mito." He whispered.

"Then pay attention, dumbass."

_______

Roughly a week later, when it was finally the time of day for their lunch period, they decided to sit at the outdoor tables without Meleoron and Ikalgo today. Partially because Gon still didn't really feel like explaining his fairly new relationship to his other friends, who were still surprised at him, and partially because they just wanted to be alone. 

Even though there were tables available, lots of them, actually. The two decided to sit on top of the brick half-wall that was almost entirely shaded by a large spruce tree.

As usual, Gon's head rested in Killua's lap. And as usual, he had forced Killua to in some way play with his hair as he played some video game on his phone and rambled on and on about Retz.

Suddenly Gon paused mid sentence, his expression growing a little weary.

"Sorry. Is all this relationship talk bothering you? I can stop if you want." He said.

Killua looked down at him, "why would relationship talk be bothering me?"

"'Cause.. you know.. you just got out of one." Gon muttered, fidgeting anxiously with his fingers.

"It's fine, Gon, really. It makes me happy seeing you happy. It's been like, a week, anyway." He smiled.

"Okay..are you sure?"

"Yes. A hundred percent."

"Aw, you're the best Killua." Gon cooed, earning a genuine laugh from Killua.

His second week back since the breakup was going great, he hadn't even really thought about it before Gon brought it up. And even now, he didn't feel too bothered by it. The day was good.

But then, just like that, Kenji walked out the cafeteria door, eyeing them down. Killua pretended not to notice as he made his way over to them.

Gon noticed immediately, not attempting to hide it whatsoever in contrast to Killua, he sat up.

Kenji stopped right in front of them, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "Cuddling in school, yeah Killua? So what, you two are official now? Or just fuck buddies?" He scoffed.

Gon stood up, "Go back to sucking off Shalnark, why don't you?" He hissed before Killua could respond.

Killua changed his seating position to where his legs dangled off the wall, he placed a hand up on Gon's shoulder.

"The fucks your problem? I was talking to Killua, dipshit." Kenji barked, shoving Gon back against the brick, almost causing him to fumble his balance.

"Hey, watch it, Kenji." Killua growled as he stood up, "don't touch him."

Gon ignored Killua, having the temperament of a fired up donkey whenever it came to standing up for his best friend. Gon shoved him back, "You were accusing both of us of something. And Killua's my best friend."

Kenji grinned maliciously, "Excuses. I know you're just pissed off because Killua was sleeping with you behind my back the whole time we were dating."

Gon felt the anger boiling over in his body. He clenched his fists, his whole body tensing up. Killua noticed.

"Gon.." Killua whispered, again placing his hand on Gon's shoulder. Gon brushed it off with his own hand.

Before another beat of silence could pass by, Gon lunged at Kenji, landing a fist to the lower right sight of his jaw. Before Killua could even react, Gon was already firing endless punches all over Kenji's face.

"Get off me!" Kenji screamed, the sound of it bringing back Killua from his thoughts.

A blonde teacher was already rushing to the scene.

"Jesus Christ—Gon!" Killua shouted, grabbing ahold of Gon's waist and dragging him off, hugging his smaller friend at his chest as he struggled.

Ms. Bisky was already crouched down, asking Kenji all sorts of questions. Then she looked up at the two of them, "What happened here?" She asked sternly.

"That crazy asshole just attacked me! I told you!" Kenji cried, responding instead of them.

"Wow, you kids are a handful." She grumbled, pressing two fingers to the bridge of her nose, "Get to the nurse, all of you. We'll discuss this more later."

Kenji grumbled something inaudible under his breath as Ms.Bisky helped him up and began walking him to the nurses office.

Killua just now finally let go of Gon, spinning Gon around to face him. "What the hell were you thinking, dumbass?" He shouted, flicking a finger to his forehead.

"Ouch..." Gon mumbled, rubbing the spot where he was struck.

"Damn it, come on, let's go." Killua cursed, grabbing a hold of his hand and leading him inside the school.

As they walked to the nurses office, Killua looked over to his side, at Gon. "Why did you do that? I can handle him on my own."

"I know.. I'm sorry—" Gon said, but Killua cut him off, "You know?? You're sorry?? You can't be going off fighting people! Do you understand they might not let you play in your game today?"

"I do—"

"So why the hell did you attack him?! Jesus, Gon."

"I didn't like how he said you were sleeping with me behind his back." Gon confessed.

"So? Let him talk whatever shit he wants, I don't care. It's not like it's true." Killua rolled his eyes as they approached the door.

Gon stopped just before they went inside, "But I care. I don't want him saying nasty stuff like that about you because I know you aren't a cheater." He sighed, "you're the most kind hearted person I know, Killua, and I don't like him shitting on that."

Killua felt a sudden heat rise to his face, but brushed it off as a result of the stress he had just been put through. "Uh—thanks, Gon. Just don't do something like that again, okay?"

Gon nodded.

Killua pushed open the door, "Let's go."

"Yeah." Gon mumbled, walking through the door.

Kenji was already sat on one of the chairs as the nurse, Mrs. Cheadle, was inspecting the damage on his face. He shot Gon a glare, Killua flipped him off behind nurse Cheadle's back.

She glanced up at the two which a sharp look in her eyes, "You two just sit down for now, if you need an ice pack go ahead and grab one while I take care of Kenji for now."

"Sure." Killua nodded, guiding Gon to sit down one of the beds further away from the nurse and Kenji. Killua sat down in front of him on an office chair, examining Gon's face gently, tracing a finger over the cut Kenji had managed to leave on his cheek.

"You're such an idiot, this will be fun having to explain to Retz later." Killua chuckled.

"Yeah." Gon laughed nervously, running his hands through his hair, revealing his already reddening knuckles.

Killua grabbed his hand, observing it carefully, "Damn, that's probably gonna bruise, huh? I'll go get you an ice pack."

"Aww, since when do you care this much about me?" Gon cooed as Killua got up.

He grabbed a ziplock bag, filling it with ice and wrapping it in a napkin. "I don't, just need to make sure you're in good shape for the next time you have to beat the crap out of somebody for me." Killua joked, pressing the bag to Gon's pulsing knuckles, "Not that I couldn't do it myself, of course."

"Sure." Gon giggled.

Killua rolled his eyes, "You really are too much, you know that?"

"Yeah, but you love me." Gon teased.

"Uh-huh, don't make me rough up your face even more."

"Mm, what do you mean by that?" Gon grinned, winking at Killua.

"Stop it!" Killua laughed, shoving him back lightly.

Then, Bisky walked in, along with Gon's coach, Morel.

Gon gulped, "Hi.. Ms. Bisky.. coach Morel.."

Killua watched the scene unfold. If Gon had gotten kicked from the game this afternoon, Gon would have never heard the end of it from him. Seeing Gon in action was always something Killua looked forward to, and he'd be pissed if it all went to shit because of his instigative butt-hurt ex.

"I talked with Ms. Bisky, about the incident that just occurred. It was foolish of you to get involved in a fight at all, let alone the day of our first game. You know you will be asked to sit out." Morel scolded.

"Yeah. I'm sorry. I can—"

"But..." Morel added, interrupting Gon.

"But... I talked with him about it. Only because you're normally a model student, Gon. Behavior-wise, anyway." Bisky said. Gon internally cried at the subtle jab at his rather not so good graded.

"Yes, she did. So, I decided that I will let you play today. But you definitely will not be starting." Morel stated.

"Oh, that's perfectly fine! As long as I get to play, thank you so much, sir!" Gon howled, both hands held high in the air.

"Glad to see you're happy about it. But don't think for a second I'm not making you run laps after the game." Morel added, a smug grin overtaking his face.

Gon's smile faded, he groaned, already dreading Morel's ruthless training, the training he had been dealing with ever since he was a freshman, all the way up to his present senior year.

"Anyway, rest up, don't get into any more trouble today or else neither me or Ms. Bisky will be able to bail you out, got it?"

"Got it."

"Good." Morel nodded, following Bisky out of the office.

"Jeez, I was so scared for a minute there." Gon exhaled sharply.

"Hey, you knew that was a possibility when you attacked Kenji." Killua reminded.

"Well, yeah, but I'd take that risk a hundred times over to make sure you're happy."

"You're seriously an idiot, what am I gonna do with you?"

____

All of their friends had come to witness Gon's first match of the season. Ikalgo, Retz, Killua, Zushi, Alluka, and Meleoron watched on the bottom half of the bleachers. Even Kurapika and Leorio, who had graduated a year prior, had driven out thirty minutes from their shared apartment to support Gon.

He was a little upset not to be starting striker in his first match, but it was a consequence he had to deal with. Anything for Killua.

All of his friends were sitting down. Well, all but Killua and Retz, anyway. They were already facing off in who could cheer the loudest, even as Gon was still sitting on the bench awaiting his playing time.

"You've got some fans out here today, huh, Gon?" Morel teased. Gon laughed.

His teammate, Knuckle, threw an arm over his shoulder, laughing, "yeah, his boyfriend, Killua! Oh, and Retz."

Gon shoved him off, still in between giggles, "you are so not funny."

Morel rolled his eyes at their shenanigans. Just ten minutes into the game, Gon's usual sub(that had been starting in this game due to Gon's fight with Kenji), Meruem, rose his hand, signaling for a sub to take his position after he had scored two, almost three goals.

"Hey, ref, can I get a sub?" Morel shouted, the referee shot him a thumbs up and blew his whistle, pausing the game.

Morel nodded, signaling Meruem over. "Alright, Gon, you're up. Play good, or I'll add a couple extra laps to your sentence." He laughed, patting him on the back.

"Got it coach!" Gon shouted enthusiastically as he sprinted to his position.

Once Gon gave a thumbs up, the referee once again blew his whistle, resuming the match.

The ball was launched straight down the field, right to the team's attacking midfielder, Colt. He gained possession of the ball, speeding down towards Gon's direction, controlling the ball precisely while maintaining his speed as the other teams defenders attempted to stop him.

"Gon!" He screamed, making a powerful direct pass to Gon.

Gon quickly trapped it, spinning around and proceeding into a series of step-overs to get into a goal-scoring range.

A tall, black haired defender from the other team pressed him. Gon faked left, then as the taller defender shifted his body weight towards left, Gon used his smaller height to his advantage, accelerating to the right instead. Killua screamed in excitement as Gon shook him off, getting a clear view of the net. Only the goalkeeper stood in his way now.

Without thinking about it for a second more, he pushed the ball forward, then shot. The ball hit the upper right corner.

Goal.

The student section, mainly Killua and Retz, exploded into cheers as Gon's teammates celebrated with him, but quickly after returning to their positions as the game began once again.

"That's my Gon!" Killua shouted, proudly crossing his arms over his chest.

Retz rolled her eyes, "Good job, baby! You're doing great! Make another goal for me!"

"Or for me!" Killua called out, shooting Retz a self-satisfied look. She grunted, but didn't say anything else.

Gon wasn't paying much attention to them, though. He was too focused running back and forth from the midfield to half-way up the other team's goal.

As the game progressed, they had been scored on eight more times. And even with Gon's three goals, Meruem's two goals, and Knuckles two goals, they were sadly defeated. Just by a single goal.

As the final whistle blew, Gon was hunched over, hands on his knees and his breath ragged.

He high-fived with the rival team, attempting not to look so sour, then quickly ran over to his friends.

"Don't forget about your laps! The JV coach hasn't wrapped up practice yet, he'll tell me if you cheat it!" Morel shouted as he finished up chatting with the other coach.

"Yeah, yeah, don't worry!" Gon called back, returning his attention to his friends. "Well, that was unlucky."

"That's cause your team sucks, you on the other hand, were amazing!" Killua exclaimed, squeezing Gon's cheek as he laughed, "thanks, Killua."

"Yeah, you were great, and you look so sexy with your hair all sweaty like that." Retz cut in, breaking them up.

"Oh, yeah, thanks." Gon blushed, his genuine laugh now turning into a nervous one. Killua just subtly rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Uh, anyways, good job, Gon, you did great!" Alluka smiled.

"Yeah, I could never run for that long! It's like you never run out of stamina, seriously. They didn't even really have to put Meruem back in." Zushi added, the rest of his friends nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, you're like a lighting bolt!" Ikalgo laughed.

"Thanks guys, but I wasn't all that special, really." Gon laughed, a little embarrassed with all the sudden praise he was receiving.

"Gon, you're kidding!" Killua cried.

"Come on Gon, don't be so humble, three goals your first game back is definitely impressive." Kurapika insisted, Retz nodded in agreement with him.

"Hell yeah, we should celebrate!" Leorio declared.

"I could definitely get behind that, long as someone brings booze." Meleoron swung an arm over Leorio's shoulder.

Gon rolled his eyes at his friends, who never seem to change. "Sure, we can go back to my place, but Mito's gonna be back around ten, so you have to all leave by then." He affirmed, receiving nods of understanding from the rest of his friends.

"Great, it's settled then, let's go!" He smiled, then remembered Morel's words, "right after I finish these laps... damn." He grumbled. "You guys just head off to your cars, I'll be done in five."

Killua laughed, "I'll run with you, it is sort of my fault you have to run laps, anyway."

Gon smiled as Killua joined him.

After four excruciating (for Killua, anyway) laps, Killua was absolutely winded. Hunched over and gasping for air. While Gon had hardly broken a sweat.

"Jesus......dude.....what are....you....some kind.....of.... mutant?..." Killua managed to say in between gasps.

"Pfft, no, I'm just in shape. I'm starting to question if you really do go to the gym." Gon laughed, patting Killua on the back, almost making him tumble over into the ground.

Once he finally caught his breath, he fixed his posture, "well, for your information, I don't do cardio. As you can tell by my awesome physique." he bragged.

"I feel like we keep having this same conversation. You still have to do cardio, Killua." Gon rolled his eyes.

"You're just jealous." Killua insisted as he flexed his bicep muscles, earning playful shove and a laugh from Gon.

"Whatever you say muscle man." Gon laughed, his eyes lingering on Killua’s bulging bicep a little too long. 

Chapter Text

        As Gon swung the door open, the rest of the group quickly pushed their way in. Leorio, Kurapika, Ikalgo, Zushi, and Meleoron, slumped on the couch while Killua and Alluka sat on the stools behind the kitchen counter. Retz stayed behind with Gon, clinging to his bicep lovingly as they walked in together, shutting the door behind them. 

"Gon, ‘ya have any alcohol?" Leorio asked. 

"Mhm, the mini fridge is stacked with beer, just don't take a noticeable amount, max is like, two per person." Gon warned, "I don't want to get a scolding from Mito." 

"Got it. Any snacks?" Leorio smiled, skipping over to the kitchen, grabbing two cold ones for him and Kurapika. 

"Should be a bunch of left overs from the bakery in the fridge." Gon replied. 

"Do you guys have any board games we could play, or something?" Kurapika called out to Gon.

"Man, screw the board games! Let's play some actual party games, like beer pong." Ikalgo proposed before Gon could even reply.

Gon snorted, "yeah, no way I'll let you guys drink enough beer for that game.", Retz giggled at the response.

"Damn, what about truth or dare? Or never have I ever?" Ikalgo suggested. 

"Let's play truth or dare!" Zushi exclaimed. 

"Truth or dare? Seriously? Are we in middle school?" Killua scoffed as he popped a piece of leftover apple pie into his mouth, Alluka elbowed him in the side, "don't be such a party pooper!"

Killua swallowed his food, then sighed, "fine, but if this gets weird, I'm out." 

"Bet! Let's play, but I think we should all get a little tipsy first." Meleoron declared

"Christ." Kurapika pressed two fingers to the bridge of his nose, Leorio chuckled and patted him on the back. 

About thirty minutes and (despite Gon’s constant protest) several cans of beer later, they all sat on the ground in a small circle, an empty liter coke bottle lying in the middle. 

"Right, Gon, since this is your place, you should get to spin first." Ikalgo grinned. 

"Sure." Gon shrugged, leaning over and giving the bottle a gentle nudge, causing it to spin a couple times and eventually land on Alluka.

"Hmm, give me a dare!" She grinned eagerly. 

"Okay, I dare you... to..." he paused for a moment, thinking, "I dare you to do your best impression of me flirting."

"Oh God, this is gonna be horrible." Killua laughed. 

"Shh! I know exactly what I'm gonna do." Alluka shushed, before standing up and clearing her throat, dropping her voice down to low and over exaggerated. 

"Ahem, are you a soccer ball? 'Cause I wanna score with you." She winked, laughing immediately after along with the rest of the group. 

"I knew it, that was horrible." Killua pressed a hand to his mouth as he smiled, the thought of Gon actually saying something so cheesy (and oh, he so would), made him giggle like a little girl.

"I would never say that!" Gon cried, still laughing. 

"Oh, you so totally would." Retz giggled, nudging him in the side. 

"I could definitely see that,” Kurapika reached a hand over his forehead, pushing blonde hair out of his face as he laughed, “Anyway, Alluka, your turn to spin." 

"Got it!" Alluka sat back down, giving the bottle a spin, it landed right on Leorio. 

"I think I'm a little scared of you, so I'm gonna go ahead and pick truth." He said, only half-joking. 

"Fine by me! What's something that someone does in this room that you secretly love?" 

"Huh, well, this is about Kurapika, obviously, but, uhh—I love the way he always looks out for me whenever I do something stupid when I'm drunk—which is basically every time." Leorio shrugged, turning his head to look over at Kurapika, who already had a slight tinge of blush creeping onto his cheeks. 

"It's nothing special." Kurapika rolled his eyes, attempting to fight the smile pulling at his lips. 

"Bunch'o saps! Let's keep going!" Meleoron called out.

"Alright, alright." Leorio waved him off, spinning the bottle. It spun fully around the circle three times, before landing on Retz.

She pressed her hand to her lips, smiling nervously, "Oh my gosh, I'm never any good at these, I'm gonna pick truth."

"Cool, so Retz, because I'm honestly dying to know, why in the world are you dating our Gon?" Leorio laughed, only half-joking, and receiving a kick in the shin from an also half-laughing Kurapika.

"Hey! Why wouldn't she want to date me? I'm deeply offended, Leorio." Gon cried, placing a hand on his chest for dramatic effect. The rest of the group laughed along, Killua the loudest, ironically.

“Gon, I could think of like, a thousand reasons why she wouldn’t.” Zushi patted him on the back.

Retz just giggled and said, "well, there's a bunch of reasons."

"Go on." Leorio encouraged.

"He's handsome, he's kind, athletic, funny, and he's a gentlemen! I mean, what else could a girl possibly want?" She shrugged, smiling, earning a bunch of ‘awws’ and ‘ooos’ from the rest of the group.

"Aww, sounds like Gon is the perfect package." Alluka cooed, sweetness remaining in her tone, despite the sarcasm laced beneath her words, all while staring at Killua. 

Killua just glared back, as if he could read her mind. At this point, he probably could. 

Retz raised an eyebrow, but just nodded along in agreement, spinning the bottle again. It landed on Killua. 

"You gonna pick dare?" Retz challenged, her eyes narrowing with playful competition.

Killua looked around for a moment, wondering if he should keep cool, take the risk of any embarrassing dare he would be forced into doing, or swallowing his pride—but saving face? 

Definitely the latter. 

"Uh, now that you said that, definitely not. I pick truth." He said.

"Okay. Sure. Truth. What kind of person is your type? Be as specific as possible." 

"Um, okay, let’s see here," he paused, thinking for a beat, "I guess, my type is somebody probably a lot more bubbly than I am, preferably shorter than me, tan, someone I could go on fun adventures and to the gym with, and I guess just someone that I could feel safe and secure around, I dunno." He mumbled, looking anywhere but at Gon.

Zushi made a loud 'oooo', Killua waved him off dismissively.

She cocked her head to the side, "That's it?"

"Yeah, I'm not picky." Killua shrugged, his tone casual. Gon giggled at his response, knowing his best friend all too well.

Retz leaned in closer to the middle of the circle, "But you do like..guys..though, right?" 

"What? Yeah—yes, I like guys. What's your point?" He asked, almost sounding offended. 

"Nothing, just, we have a really similar type. That's all!" She giggled.

Killua shifted uncomfortably, unsure of what she could have meant by that, "Right." 

"Anyway, your turn!" Retz declared, and Killua lightly pushed the bottle, causing it to spin just once, landing on Gon. 

"Damn, finally!" Killua cried, "Gon, please, pick dare, or I'm going to die." 

"Uh, I really don't think I want to with the way you're acting.." 

"Gon!" Killua pleaded, giving Gon his best puppy-dog eyes. 

Gon rolled his eyes, smiling, "fine, dare, but nothing crazy okay?" 

"Yup, yup, anyway. I dare you to let me fix your hair." Killua called out like it the words released him of some kind of physical pain. 

"My hair? Why do you wanna fix it?" Gon asked, pure curiosity in his voice. 

"Uh, in case you haven't seen your reflection, your hair is standing up like, ten different ways in the front." Killua rolled his eyes, laughing, “it’s starting to make me mad, and I know you’re too stubborn to listen to me outside of a dare.”

"I think he looks good like that! Come on, Killua." Retz whined as she stretched out the vowels in his name,  receiving a weird look from Killua. Just a split second, not enough to alert anyone else in the group. 

"You should be thanking me!" Killua insisted.

"A dare’s a dare, can't be helped." Gon shrugged, crawling over through the middle of the circle, right over to Killua. 

He sat in front of him as Killua brushed his fingers through his hair. Gon was immediately relaxed, anybody with eyes could tell. 

As Killua finished laying the pieces of his hair back down, Gon was smiling a big goofy smile as he returned to his spot, "you're the best, Killua."

"Obviously." Killua laughed. 

"Jesus." Ikalgo mumbled under his breath, nobody replied. 

The game went on smoothly after that, Meleoron was forced to bite into a raw onion, Ikalgo was asked if he’d suck toes, Zushi was dared to call his mom and say he was pregnant, then Kurapika had to—attempt to—do a summersault. Spoiler, it didn’t go too well. 

Leorio had to let Retz draw a tattoo on him, Alluka had to confess to having a crush on her teacher last year, and Gon had to show everyone his recent search history—which was very tame, to no one’s surprise, but it was still fun to know. 

To Killua’s surprise, he still had yet to be tormented throughout this entire game. Yet.

A few more exciting dares and boring truths were passed along the group, before Ikalgo's bottle landed on Killua. 

Killua grinned, "Definitely truth. Your dares have been horrible." 

"Perfect! Killua, what was your first kiss like? And who was it with?" Ikalgo raised an eyebrow, leaning in, almost like he knew.

"Uh, my first kiss?" Killua stiffened, heat rising to his face, the pink being clearly visible on his pale cheeks. He looked over at Gon, who had slightly reddened as well. 

"Yeah, is that a problem?" Ikalgo asked.

"No.. it's not.. um.." he paused, "my first kiss was, uh, kind of funny, I guess, we basically just smashed our teeth together." He managed to stutter out. 

"You have to add more detail than that!" Ikalgo demanded. 

Killua looked over at a blushing Gon for just a moment, before turning back to Ikalgo, swallowing heavily.

"Okay. Um. We were on the floor, in his bedroom. It wasn't like, a real kiss, we were just laughing the whole time, it was pretty good, aside from the first couple awkward seconds, I dunno!" Killua cried, not knowing what else to say.

"Ugh, I'll take it. And who was it?" Ikalgo pressed.

He let out a fake cough, trying to stall enough time to come up with something clever, which he was clearly struggling with, “Is that important?” 

“Killua, come on! No one’s shied away from a question yet.” Meleoron complained.

“Yeah, please! Come on!” I added.

“I already told you how it was, why does it matter who—”

“It was me.” Gon blurted.

Retz choked.

"Excuse me?" Kurapika laughed, "how come I've never heard of this?"

"Me neither!" Zushi cried. 

Next to Kurapika, Leorio had already exploded into a fit of laughter that clearly wasn't going to die down anytime soon. 

Gon on the other hand, was a blushing mess. Along with Killua, who was already doing a better attempt at hiding it.

"That's.. definitely interesting! How'd that happen?" Retz asked, trying her best not to sound too invested.

"I don't think that's important." Gon said dismissively, “I think it’s enough that you guys even know that.”

"Aw, come on! I gotta know!" Leorio begged. 

"It's nothing special. Gon needed practice before he kissed his girlfriend, in like, seventh grade, I'm serious when I say it wasn't a real kiss or anything like that." Killua mumbled, pressing the back of his cold hand to his hot cheek. 

"Pretty typical for the two of you, can’t say I’m all too shocked." Kurapika said. His words made Retz frown.

“So, Killua, did Gon spark your gay awakening?” Leorio teased, wiggling his eyebrows up and down, causing the whole group to erupt in teasing giggles, all but Retz—who just shifted awkwardly.

“Okay—first of all—no. My gay awakening was Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic.” Killua hissed defensively, “Second of all—we already said it wasn’t like that!” 

“Okay, okay, I’m just poking fun at you, don’t get so angry.” Leorio assured.

Killua scoffed, “Yeah, whatever.” 

Thirty minutes later, the whole room had seemingly already forgotten about what Killua had confessed. All except the two involved, and Retz, of course.

"Okay, this game’s getting extremely boring guys. Let's do something else." Meleoron complained. 

"Nah, it's fine, it's getting late anyways, sorry to kick you guys out, but I kinda have to." Gon chuckled, "Mito's gonna be back soon, she doesn't really like me having big groups of friends over at once." 

"Yeah, fine with us, me and Leorio have an early morning class tomorrow, anyway, so we should probably get going." Kurapika nodded, standing up along with Leorio. 

"We'll all hangout some other time, goodnight!" Leorio called out, Kurapika waved them goodbye as they left. 

"Bye!" The group called back in unison. 

Next to leave was Meleoron, then Ikalgo, then Zushi.

Killua and Alluka stood by the door, saying their last goodbyes to Gon and Retz, mainly Gon. 

"Right, we'll see you at school tomorrow, bye Gon, Retz." Killua waved as he left, Alluka followed along, calling out, "Bye Gon! Bye Retz!"

"Bye guys! Be safe! I miss you already!" Gon called back. 

"Anyway, I should get going now too." Retz said. 

"Yeah, tonight was fun, though. Do you.. like my friends?" He asked nervously.

"They're definitely... something. But of course, they're sweet." Retz smiled, "but, uh, was that true?"

"Was what true?" Gon knew exactly what, but he rather play dumb in hopes of her dropping the whole thing altogether.

"You and Killua..kissed..before?" She mumbled, almost at a whisper. 

"Oh—that. Um. Yeah, it is true." He stuttered, "But it meant nothing! Like he said, it was a fake kiss." 

Retz pursed her lips, "Sorry.. I just don't know if I'm comfortable with that or not.." 

"Yeah, I do see where you're coming from.." he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, "but I promise, we're just really close, I really like you, Retz. Killua's just my best friend." Gon reassured, calming her nerves a little.

"Okay, I guess. I'll see you tomorrow." She said, planting a quick kiss on his lips and leaving as Gon waved goodbye, shutting the door after her.

He quickly tidied up the kitchen, disposing of any left over beer cans so that way he wouldn't get in trouble with Mito. Then, he shot up the stairs and into his room, falling down onto his bed in exhaustion.

"Mm, I still have to shower." He grumbled to himself. 

Gon stripped off his clothes, leaving only his underwear on as he walked into the bathroom. He twisted the shower knob about halfway down towards 'H'. 

The sound of water hitting the bathtub echoed as steam began to fill the room. He set up his phone on one of the shower shelves away from the water, shook off his boxers, then stepped in. 

He turned on some random movie on his Netflix recommended, then lathered soap in his hands, spreading it all over his body. 

A few minutes later, his phone shifted lower as it vibrated, an incoming call from Killua replaced the movie he was previously watching. He giggled, only Killua would FaceTime him after only just leaving thirty minutes ago. 

Gon angled the camera just a little higher, that way he was only shown from the shoulders up, then answered the FaceTime. 

"Hey, what's up?" He asked, massaging a clump of shampoo into his scalp.

"Shit, sorry, are you showering? I can call you back." Killua's voice came from the other end, sounding a little bit more frantic than usual. 

"Nah, it's fine, the movie I was watching was horrible anyway. I can talk now." Gon replied nonchalantly, as if he wasn't butt-ass naked on FaceTime with Killua right now. 

"Gon. You're literally naked."

Gon laughed and rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I'd hope so. I am showering after all." 

"Jesus, save it for Retz, weirdo. I'll call you back." Killua groaned, before ending the call.

Gon frowned. What was his problem?

_____

Killua threw his phone on the other side of his queen-sized bed. What has been going on with him these last couple of days? It was normal that Gon had called him whilst in the shower, it's not like he hadn't done that before. What changed now? 

Surely it wasn't because of Retz, Gon has had plenty of other girlfriends in the past, they never actually bothered Killua, even the worst of them. 

He sat on the corner of his bed, head in his hands, thinking his whole life's trajectory over about a million times. Still, he couldn't get Gon out of his head.

Then, his phone rang. He expected Gon.

Instead, it was his father.

Like he was going to pick up. Fat chance!

"Killua, pick up the phone! I'm not kidding!" Illumi hissed from the other room.

Damn it.

Killua picked up his phone, swiping the answer button and putting the phone up against his ear. "Hello, father?"

"Killua, I heard from Illumi you've gotten into quite a bit of trouble at school today." His voice was sharp and stern.

"Quite a bit of trouble is pushing it, my friend got into a fight to defend me from something I didn't even start, how's that my fault at all?" 

"It's your fault for associating yourself with people enough who are foolish enough to get into school fights." Silva hissed. 

"Whatever, not like it matters." Killua scoffed. 

"It does matter. In less than a year, you'll be heading off to law school, you think a delinquent could take over the family business? You're surely mistaken." 

"I'm not a delinquent, Jesus Christ, you and mom take everything so damn serious. Leave me alone, I'm doing just fine." Killua barked, hanging up before his father could get so much as another syllable in. 

Killua groaned, crawling up to his pillow and falling down against it. Shortly after, his anger wore off, and he managed to doze off, forgetting completely about his promise to call Gon back.

Chapter Text

      Gon's back slammed against the wall, a squeaky moan escaping his lips as Killua slammed a hand on the wall just over his head.

"Are you…uh—are you sure you want this?" Killua asked, stammering a little. 

"Yes—fuck—yes, I want this. I want you. Killua!" Gon cried out, as if not having Killua all over him was actually painful. 

With that response, Killua pushed him back onto his bed. Gon's pants were already down, sagging at his ankles. Just his underwear remained. 

Killua leaned down, planting short-and-sexy kisses down his body, starting from his neck, all the way down to just above his crotch. "God, please—stop teasing—just do it already, Killuaaa!" Gon begged, stretching out the last ‘a’ in his name.

Holy shit, that was hot.

Killua swallowed. Hard. 

He nodded, placing his fingers underneath Gon's waist band, pulling it off slowly, then—

Killua bumped his head on the headboard of his bed, where he definitely still was, definitely not in Gon's room about to do God-only-knows what. His eyes shot open as he awoke, sweat dripping down his forehead and back, pieces of his hair sticking to his forehead uncomfortably.

"What the fuck?" He whispered to himself, unsure of what had just happened. Was it a dream? Did that really happen? 

He looked around for a moment, reassuring that his best friend was nowhere to be found.

No. It was a dream.

Killua looked down, a huge tent bulging in the basketball shorts he had fallen asleep in. 

"Jesus. Was that a... a fucking sex dream?" he mumbled, rubbing the back of his head. He hasn't had one of those since sophomore year. 

Then, he once again recalled who specifically the dream was about.

"Okay, this is seriously getting weird." Killua whispered, checking the time. The clock read five o'three. 

He rubbed his eyes, despite the fact he was a thousand percent awake now due to his unwarranted arousal, it was still extremely early in the morning. He normally woke up at around six thirty, but he definitely wouldn't be falling asleep after that. 

Killua looked down at his shorts again, groaning at the aching bulge that was surely not going away anytime soon. 

..Not if he didn't do anything about it, that is. 

"Fuck. Am I seriously going to jerk off after having a sex dream about—about Gon? Fuck. Fuck." Killua cursed repeatedly, his hand pressed so hard against his mouth it left a pink print when he took it away. 

He sighed a breath of utter defeat, "Might as well. I'll just think about something else. Yep. Then I'll never think about this ever again." 

Killua laid back down in his bed, head falling against the now propped up pillow. He grabbed a handful of tissues off his nightstand, just to be ready. Waking up in the ungodly hours of the morning was one thing, but waking up in the ungodly hours of the morning to wash your bedsheets was another. Killua was definitely not in the mood to explain himself to Illumi. Not now, not ever. 

Killua laid one leg straight down on his bed, bringing his other leg up into a sort of ballerina pose for comfort. He reached his left arm, still holding the bundle of tissues, behind his head, propping his head up higher. He exhaled, reaching his free right hand down, into his pants, into the waist band of his boxers. He pulled both down just a little, just enough for his already pulsing dick to be accessible for him. 

Then, after lubing his hand with some old lotion, he began pumping up and down. Slowly, but with efficiency. Killua scavenged his brain as to what to think about.

Normally, he would have put on some brainless porn video on his laptop, but said laptop, unfortunately was currently on his desk, all the way on the other side of his room. Killua couldn't possibly get up to go get it without alarming Illumi of the fact that Killua was awake, causing him to barge into the room completely unnoticed prior. That was the last possible thing Killua would want right now. Or ever, as a matter of fact. 

He tried to think about previous boyfriends, his favorite celebrities, Calvin Klein models, he even tried thinking about women. Nothing worked, he felt like he was just stroking his hand up and down uselessly. 

Killua shut his eyes and groaned silently out of frustration. He wanted this to be over as soon as possible, but his complete and utter lack of mental engagement wasn't bringing him any closer to finishing. 

A split second. All it took was a split second, an image of Gon flashed in his head. A smile on his face, glistening with sweat after his soccer game. And for that moment, he felt extremely turned on. Killua shook his head, quickly knocking the stupid image out of his even stupider brain. But damn, was nothing else seriously going to work? 

Why all of a sudden, was his best friend—making him feel so aroused? Why has his body never longed for anybody else like this? The way it was longing for Gon right now?

Eventually, he internally admitted defeat, this time willingly imagining the boy. He pictured Gon, who was just post-practice. Covered in sweat, shirt off, and those damn short shorts clinging tightly to his quads and ass. His face, an accomplished yet fired-up expression occupying his face. His body, those bulging muscles, glistening from sweat. 

Damn.

The guy was one hell of an athlete with one hell of a body. 

Soon, his fantasies went from innocent admiration, to horny nonsense.

Now, he imaged Gon. His tan, muscular body bent over Killua’s dresser. He flinched as Killua slowly thrusted himself into his whimpering mess of a best friend.

“Mm, Fuck—Killua! You’re so big…I love it when you stretch me out.” He would call out behind him, and Killua would laugh slowly and give him a light spank on his right butt cheek.

Oh, fuck. Now that was hot.

Killua kept stroking his hand up and down his length, faster now. Killua dropped the napkins and slapped a hand to his mouth to silence his moans as he came in white stripes all over his stomach, whimpering Gon’s name as he fully released.

"Mmm, fuck." He groaned pleasurably, before coming to the realization that, he in fact, did not catch his cum in the tissue paper as he originally had planned to—and was now completely covered in it.

Killua ended up using the tissue to wipe the mess off his stomach, "Man, that's disgusting." 

"Might as well get up now, at least Illumi won't catch me doing anything gross." He semi-whispered to himself as he got up, walking into the bathroom that connected to his room. 

He dropped the soaked tissues in the toilet, flushing it. Just throwing them in the trash wasn't enough, definitely not. 

Then, he grabbed a rag and ran it under the sink. He ringed some of the water out first, then finished cleaning the remaining residue from his stomach.

As he returned to his bed, a sudden wave of guilt and post-nut-clarity washed over him like a damn tsunami. 

He had just had a sex dream about his best friend. And if that wasn't bad enough. He had also masturbated to said best friend just a few mere minutes after, along with a really fucked up freak fantasy. He pressed both hands over his eyes, groaning softly. 

”Do I—do I want to fuck my best friend?” 

He laid flat on his back for a few minutes, his arms down at his sides now, as he looked up at the ceiling, thinking.

Eventually coming to the conclusion that, yes, he may want to fuck his best friend.

"I'm the worst ever." Killua whispered, pressing the back of his cold hand against his hot forehead.

He remained in his position, sulking for a solid thirty minutes. Then, his phone chimed. It was six on the dot now, who could possibly be awake? He thought, before lifting up the phone just so slightly so he could see his lock screen, which was now flooded with text messages from the star of the show himself. 

"Christ, it's like he knows." Killua cried, dropping the phone back down on the blanket beside him. He exhaled, preparing himself, then picked up his phone again, this time typing in his password and opening Gon's messages. 

6:00 GON: goodmorning killua 💜

6:00 GON: are u awake yet?????

6:01 GON: i have morning practice today so beware i might be late to first period don't be too mad at me💜💜💜

Killua caught himself smiling from ear to ear, as if he was a middle-school girl texting her crush, practically forgetting all about what had transpired just half an hour ago. He texted back, a simple "have fun💙", and quickly shot up out of his bed, heading back to the bathroom. 

Might as well get ready and go to school sooner than later. Besides, if Gon was there, he'd be able to watch him and his hot teammates practice. Easy entertainment, and he'd be able to fully get his mind off of this morning's homoerotic event. Probably.

Probably? Hopefully. 

He squeezed out a pea sized blob of toothpaste onto his toothbrush, then brushed his teeth while he scrolled mindlessly through his phone. Then, he set his phone down, scrubbed his teeth for a few extra seconds for good measure, and spit the toothpaste into the sink under running water. 

Killua shut off the water, looking up into the mirror to check his reflection. He looked good, good enough, anyway. He ruffled a hand through his hair, which satisfied him enough to leave the bathroom and begin hunting for an outfit he could wear. 

Five minutes pass of Killua shuffling through his large closet, so full of clothes he often forgets he owns about half of them—Perks of being the heir to the country's fastest rising law firm, the only perk Killua was really even fond of. 

He sheds his pajamas, pulling on a clean pair of boxers, black baggy jeans and white socks. He pulled a plain white t-shirt over his head, completing the look with a silver chain and a black leather jacket that he left unzipped. 

Killua grabbed his phone, charger, and his school bag, then made his way towards the front door, where Illumi already sat at the kitchen table, typing away on his laptop with a focused expression on his face. Next to him was Milluki, staring at the computer screen with a very unamused look on his face, before looking over to Killua.

"I'm leaving early, I have a study group for an upcoming exam, fine with you?" Killua said casually, slipping on a pair of grey sneakers. It was a lie, of course, but it was also the only way he could leave for school at six thirty without being bombarded with questions by his overbearing older brothers. 

Milluki looked back at the computer screen without a reply, he knew the question was directed at Illumi.

"Fine by me, study hard." Illumi replied absentmindedly, still too engrossed in his computer to truly acknowledge his younger brother.

"Cool, see 'ya." Killua called out, shutting the door behind him and locking it with his copy of the key.

He got into his car, turning on the engine and driving off into the direction of his high school, tapping his fingers to some random pop song that played on the morning radio. 

He didn't typically drive to school, since he lived fairly close. Along with that, a walk in the morning always served nicely to clear his head, starting his day off great. But once the colder months came by, walks in the chilly morning became less about clearing his mind, and more about trying to not freeze to death.

Once he arrived, he parked in his own reserved senior parking spot, stepped out, and locked his car. The parking lot was still fairly deserted, except for a few staff members' cars along with the majority of the boys soccer team, and the football team, of course. 

Morning practices were the exact reason Killua would never join a high school sport ever again. He tried out for soccer along with Gon in freshman year, but quit after about three weeks. He was definitely more of a gym bro. Killua preferred doing things when he wanted to, not because some angry middle aged coach ordered him to. And with the gym, he could go at any time he wanted, if he even wanted to go at all. Perfect for him.

The cold October air sent chills through his body as he strolled down to the turf field, where the entire varsity team was currently running laps around the track. All except Knuckle, who was currently struggling in between catching his breath and chugging his water bottle. Coach Morel was busy in the middle of the field, setting up cones to practice drills with the team. 

Killua jogged over to the bleachers, sitting down next to Knuckle, "You struggling to keep up, or what?" He laughed. 

"Funny. Why're you here? Class doesn't start until seven forty-five." Knuckle replied breathlessly. 

Killua shrugged, "Yeah, I know, I just woke up early today, decided I wanted to come watch Gon practice, since I had nothing better to do." 

"Aww, fulfilling your duties as Freecss' girlfriend?" Knuckle teased, punching his shoulder playfully. 

"That is so not funny. Retz is gonna have your head atop a silver platter if you keep making jokes like that. Pfft—Probably mine as well." Killua rolled his eyes, his cheeks growing pink. He received a laugh from Knuckle as he finished drinking his water, then, he ran back to the track and joined the rest of his team as they finished up their laps.

Then, he heard a familiar voice scream his name. Bringing a genuine smile back to his face. 

"Killua!" Gon shouted, sprinting over to the bleachers where he and Knuckle sat. He plopped down next to Killua, throwing an arm over his shoulder. 

"Hey, stupid, Morel isn't gonna kick me out, right?" Killua asked. 

"Nah, he'll probably put your butt to work, though." Gon chuckled. 

Killua smirked, "Thought so. 'Least I won't be running laps at six in the morning, I seriously don't know how you all do it." 

Gon shrugged, "it's not all bad, try some cardio for once, all that heavy lifting made you so easily winded." 

"Cardio's for pussies." 

"Sure." Gon rolled his eyes, laughing. 

"Hey, Freecss! Chit-chat later, don't ya see the rest of your team is already on the field? We're waiting for ya!" Coach Morel screamed, making Gon realize he'd been too focused on talking with Killua instead of listening to what was going on. 

"Crap, we'll talk later!" Gon cried, quickly sprinting to the middle of the field where the rest of his sleep deprived teammates stood. 

"Zoldyck! Since you so clearly want to distract my players, why don't you come over here and help out?" Morel called out, his tone passive aggressive as ever. 

Killua sighed, he wasn't surprised, Morel always found a way to make use of him whenever he had come to watch Gon practice. Killua was convinced Morel still wasn't over him quitting back in freshman year. At least he didn't have to do any real exercise against his will. He got up with a shiver, making his way towards the field in a speed walk, attempting to warm up in the cold weather.

"Right then, since this is our first early practice of the season, and I can tell you all don't want to be here, I'll give you all credit for showing up." Morel announced with a laugh, "That being said, we'll have a fun practice today, we'll start off with power and finesse." 

The team began to chatter excitedly as they formed two lines a few meters away from the goal net. The line on the left began with Gon, and the line on the right began with Knuckle, the usual friendly rivals. Killua stood a little further away, confused on why everybody was so excited, as he wasn't familiar with the game. 

"Killua, can you help out with this?" Morel asked. 

"Sure, what do I do?"

"Just go stand by the net and pass the balls to one person at a time, the two different lines are their teams. The whole point of the game is that you have to pass them two balls, and they have to try and score at least one." Morel explained, "If they don't score a single goal, they’re out, but they can stand behind the net and if they catch a stray ball in their hands, they're allowed back in." 

"Okay, what if they make both goals?" Killua asked, walking along with him towards the net and the ball bag.

"If they make both goals, then they can challenge a person on the opposing team, and if that person doesn't make both goals, they are out, even if they score at least one." Morel replied, "Do 'ya get it?"

"Sure. Sounds easy enough for me." Killua shrugged, bending down and dumping all of the balls out of the bag, kicking them behind him into the front corner of the goal where he could easily reach them.

After twenty-some minutes of playing, Gon heard a familiar voice call out his name from the bleachers. 

"Hi, Gon!" Retz giggled, waving at him. 

Gon just smiled and waved back, but remained in his position in line. Killua was once again put off by her presence. None of Gon's other girlfriends had ever come by to watch Gon practice, it was always just Killua, and he was accustomed to it staying that way. Until now apparently, that is. 

Killua's next pass to Colt was rather weak, resulting in Colt having to practically run up into the goal to even reach the ball. 

"Come on, Killua! What was that?" Colt grumbled as he walked back to his line, after surprisingly scoring one of the slow balls that had been passed to him. 

"Be grateful I'm helping!" Killua hissed, getting ready to pass the ball to the next teammate, Uvogin. 

"What's up, Zoldyck? ‘Ya distracted by Gon's pretty lady?" Uvogin teased. 

Killua passed him the first ball with all the leg power he could muster, "Not in a million years." 

Uvogin took just one touch, immediately scoring the first ball without hesitation. "So it's Gon you're distracted by?" He grunted, just barely loud enough for him to hear. 

Killua passed the second ball all the way to his right, where he could just barely reach. He missed the second ball. 

"That was on purpose!" He cried. 

"Don't be butt-hurt, go back in line." Killua rolled his eyes.

After forty minutes of power and finesse, World Cup, and Uvogin screaming at the top of his lungs after every goal he made, Gon's soccer practice had finally come to an early end. 

As Killua looked over at Gon, sweaty and bent over with his hands on his knees, he suddenly remembered his earlier fantasy. He tried not to think about it, but oh, it was so hard not to.

He felt his pants tightening as something else became hard as well. 

Oh, fuck.

Killua stayed on the field, helping coach Morel put away all of the equipment as he hoped the humiliating problem in his pants would go away on its own soon. He pulled his shirt as far down as it could possibly go in a sorry attempt to hide it.

Gon was already on the bleachers, chugging from his water bottle with Retz by his side. 

"You're even amazing at practice, Gon! No wonder you're so great at soccer!" Retz praised as she pushed strands of sweaty hair away from Gon's forehead. 

"You're too sweet, Retz." He laughed, taking another big sip of water. 

"Mmm, yeah, anyways, I was thinking..since we have twenty minutes until class starts—"

Just before she could finish her sentence, Killua had already jogged over to where they were, interrupting her: "Gon! What are you doing? Put your cleats away and go change, I'm not letting you be late to first period again." 

Gon frowned, and Retz rolled her eyes. 

Despite Killua’s annoyance, he was relieved to see that they hadn’t seen how hard he was right now. Atleast not by the looks on their faces

"He'll be fine, I think Gon wants to spend some time with his girlfriend before class.. so.. one more tardy won't hurt. Right, Gon?" Retz purred, placing a hand on Gon's chest. 

"Uh, right." Gon laughed nervously, avoiding eye contact with Killua. 

"Spend some time with his girlfriend before class?" Killua scoffed, before turning around and making his way towards the school, "Yeah, okay, see 'ya, then."

Retz smiled, grabbing ahold of Gon's hand as he finished tying his shoe laces, "Come with me." 

"Okay." Gon laughed in confusion. 

She guided him a couple meters away from the bleachers, where the field house bathrooms were. She led him behind the building, standing by the wall. 

Gon raised an eyebrow, sliding his backpack from his left hand up to his shoulder, "How come we're here?" 

"Just.. wanted some privacy." She smiled.

"Okay.."

They stared at each other in silence for a minute, before Retz let out a short laugh, her tone passive aggressive, "Is he always this cautious about what you do? He sort of acts like some kind of overbearing mother.”

"I mean, I guess? Sure." Gon shrugged. 

"Hm, okay." Retz leaned in closer to him, hovering her lips just over his. 

Gon took a small step back, "What are you doing?"

She leaned back, placing her hands on her hips as an annoyed expression overtook her face, "Trying to kiss my boyfriend?" 

"Oh, yeah, sorry. But maybe not now? If this is all you wanted to do..we can do it later, but class is about to begin." Gon mumbled.

"Come on. You're no fun, you're sounding like Killua." She groaned. 

Gon raised an eyebrow, his tone suddenly turning defensive, "what's wrong with that?" 

She paused for a second, realizing she might have struck a nerve, "nothing, sorry, I didn't mean it in a bad way." 

"It's fine." He shrugged, "So, we'll do this later?" 

"I guess. If I still feel like it." 

Gon smiled, "Good, anyway, let me walk you to class."

"No, it's fine." Retz mumbled, "I was planning on meeting some friends anyway. I'll see you later, okay?" 

His smile slightly faded, looking a bit more forced now, "Oh. Yeah, okay. We'll catch up later." 

"Yup. Bye!" She called out, before walking off into the direction of the main entrance. 

Gon sighed, mentally beating himself up over the decision of going with Retz instead of Killua. Considering he still had to change and go to his locker, he'd be at least five minutes late, and that's if he really hurried.

Mental note, always listen to Killua. Killua knows best.

Chapter Text

    Later that evening, Killua sat on Gon’s bed, while Gon sat on the floor with his back against the bed frame and whining Killua's ears off. 

Gon slapped his hands over his head as his phone blew up with text messages from Retz, all of which being videos of couples costume ideas. Considering that now Halloween was just a week away, and Meruem's annual Halloween house party was this Friday night, just barely two days away at this point.

Killua listened as Gon lost his shit, laughing hysterically. Watching Gon freak out calmed his own nerves, just a little bit. 

"How am I gonna tell her that me and you always match Halloween costumes! I swear, she's seen us at all the other Halloween parties!" He cried, "what makes this one any different?" 

"Dude, chill, match with your girlfriend. I'll just do a trio costume with Leorio and Kurapika, don't worry, okay?" Killua reassured, his voice genuine as he attempted to calm him down. 

"No! I want to match with you, that's our thing." Gon grumbled, “I also don’t know how Leorio and Kurapika would feel about you intruding on their couples costume.”

Killua shrugged and rolled his eyes, "Then just tell her. What are you—scared of your girlfriend?" 

"Yes!" 

"Why do I even bother asking," Killua laughed, "alright, just tell her we match every year and that I'll be super mad if you ditch me or something." 

"But I don't want to put the blame on you." Gon frowned.

Killua laid back, crossing his legs and throwing his arms behind his head. "You aren't putting any blame on me, it'll be fine, you're seriously making this more complicated than it needs to be." 

Gon turned around, shifting his position to where he was on his knees, with his arms on the bed and his chin resting on Killua's thigh, "Okay, yeah, I guess I am."

In response to this, Killua's body tensed up, his cheeks now suddenly glowing bright red and shorts suddenly growing tight.

Gon felt Killua shift uncomfortably under his chin, he raised an eyebrow in suspicion. 

…Meanwhile, all that was going through Killua's mind were flashbacks of the very lewd dream he had about Gon—his sexy, tan, muscular best friend, bent over the dresser as he came undone under Killua, railing into his—

"Killua?" Gon tilted his head, still lying on top of Killua's thigh. 

"Uh—yeah?" He blurted, attempting to seem as calm as possible. He failed. Miserably. 

Gon shifted his head suspiciously closer to Killua's now throbbing bulge, just underneath his beige linen shorts—thankfully covered by his thick black hoodie. 

Seriously, it was almost as if he knew. How painfully unaware could he be; about how he was making Killua go crazy right now?

As he nudged closer and closer, stopping just before his head could reach Killua’s crotch, and all Killua could think about was the position they were in—how easily Gon could open his mouth, and wrap his soft pink lips around Killua’s aching cock. It’s all too much to handle.

Killua's eyes darted around the room in a sudden panic.

"Are you hiding something from me? You're acting weird." Gon questioned, his eyes lingering a little too low a little too long—unbeknownst to Killua, of course.

He coughed, wavy tufts of white hair covering his wide eyes as he steadied his breathing, "No. What would I be hiding from you?" 

Gon smirked, his eyes narrowing just a bit, "I dunno, you're all red and twitching, you’re also breathing like you just finished a marathon." 

"I'm fine, and I'm not hiding anything, that's that." Killua stated, holding his ground. 

"You sure you're not hiding a dirty little secret? Your face says otherwise." Gon continued to pry, his lips pouting, innocent eyes looking up directly into Killua’s.

Fuck, it all looked so lewd.

"Jeez, Gon, lay off. What could I be hiding from you? You know everything." Killua rolled his eyes, his face maintaining the same shade of bright red. 

"Maybe you're hiding like.. a crush on me or something?" Gon teased. 

Killua shot up, choking on seemingly nothing, "A—A what?? Of course not!" He cried defensively. 

Gon burst into laughter, "I'm just kidding! You know I always joke like this, are you always this serious? That's not the Killua I know." 

"Well, the Gon I know doesn't say stupid stuff like that." Killua grumbled, then, "Never mind, you definitely do. All the time." 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to tease," he spoke, his tone genuine, "but seriously, are you okay? I feel like you've been acting weird around me since this morning." 

Killua furrowed his eyebrows, "I haven't. Maybe your stupid girlfriend's been putting too many ideas in your head." he hissed. 

Gon's eyes widened, just for a moment before returning back to normal. As if he was stunned by Killua's words, but then again not all that surprised. 

"Killua, are you maybe..jealous?” 

“What? No.”

“Mmm, I think you’re super jealous.” Gon giggled, a teasing grin on his face.

“Gon. I’m not jealous.” Killua repeated.

Gon frowned, letting out a sigh, “You're still my best friend, you know that right? Retz isn’t replacing you, so you have no reason to be jealous.”

“Exactly why I’m not!” 

“Killua, just be honest with me!” 

Killua's expression grew angrier, as if the mere idea of him being jealous about Retz offended him deeply, "Now I'm really sure you've gone insane. There isn't a world that exists where I’d be jealous of one of your girlfriends, especially Retz.”

Gon frowned, "You're making it sound like she's some horrible girl."

Killua paused, his expression going softer now, "Right. Sorry. Didn't mean it like that." 

Gon's smile returned to his face as he climbed fully onto the bed, flopping on top of Killua, causing him to grunt. 

"Ugh, dude! Get off! You weigh, like, a thousand pounds!" He cried, his blush a lot less furious than last time. Gon giggled but rolled off of him onto the side. 

"Jokes aside, we're friends, right?" Gon asked, looking up at him. 

"Best friends." Killua corrected. 

"Yeah. So that means you'll tell me if you're upset with me?" 

"Yeah, what gave you the idea that I wouldn't?" 

Gon was about to bring up the earlier string of events, like his and Retz' recent silent battles—but he decided against it. All Killua would do is deny, deny, deny anyway, he was sure of it. 

"Nothing. I just want to make sure you know you can always talk to me," he smiled, "because as much as I love Retz, I would eventually get over her, I couldn't stand to lose you. Like, ever.”

Killua's blush returned once again, this time, as furious and humiliating as ever. "You're stupid." He grumbled, turning his head to look the other way.

 In his head, he knew he felt the same exact way. He could never stand to lose Gon. But he would never admit it out loud, not to himself, not to Gon, not to anyone. 

Still, Gon already knew. But he decided to tease Killua nonetheless. 

"Don't be so cold!" Gon whined, "sometimes I wonder if you even like me at all!" 

"Now you're being even stupider, of course I like you." Killua mumbled.

"Let me hear you really say it!" Gon pressed.

Killua groaned, but reluctantly, gave up. Gon always got his way, that's just how things worked between the two of them. Unfortunately for Killua's sanity.

"Gon, I like you." 

Gon crossed his arms, eyes narrowing playfully, "No, say 'Gon, I love you.'" 

"Christ, dude! Save it for your girlfriend!" Killua shouted in embarrassment. 

"You never had a problem saying it before." Gon frowned.

"Oh my god!" Killua cried in irritation, pressing his hand to his forehead as he finally mumbled, "Gon, I love you.” 

Gon's lip curled into his usual shit-eating grin, the same one that would always appear on his face when he messed with his shy mess of a best friend, "Aww, Killua, you're too sweet." 

"You're not funny." Killua grumbled, flicking Gon on the forehead. 

"Ouch! Okay! I'm sorry." He replied, pouting his lips and tugging at Killua's sleeve. 

Killua rolled his eyes, but couldn't resist the smile creeping onto his face. "Whatever, since we were on the topic, how about we start looking for costumes? If we don't, we're gonna be stuck with the shitty ones that get left over." 

"Mmm, you're right. How about I drive us to Spirit Halloween?" Gon offered, Killua nodded in approval of the idea. 

"Spirit Halloween it is, then!" He shouted, pulling a dark green hoodie over his white tank top, matching nicely with his grey sweatpants, sagging just a bit around his ankles.

They quickly ran downstairs—Killua grabbed Gon’s car keys—Gon told Mito they were going out—and they were off.

The drive was short, but to Killua, it felt like hours had passed before they’d finally arrived.

Like how songs with lyrics that previously seemed innocent, started to feel targeted towards him, and it was absolutely freaking him out. 

‘Are you into me? Like I’m into you?’ 

Jesus. 

Then, the intro to Careless Whisper by George Michael began to play, an intro he knew all too well. The pretensioner in Killua’s seatbelt tightened as he practically shot up to skip the song. 

Gon glanced over at him with a concerned look on his face, but quickly and without a word turned his attention back to the road.

Only minutes passed, minutes of Gon staring intensely at the road, minutes of Gon putting his arm across Killua’s chest to push him against the seat at every stop sign. 

It was so hot. Too hot. Literally.

“Can you turn on the air conditioner? I’m sweating.” 

Gon raised an eyebrow, “Killua, it’s like—zero degrees in here, are you crazy?”

“Ugh, nevermind.” He groaned, attempting to cool down by pressing his face against the icy-cold glass of the window.

After—seemingly—an eternity, they finally arrived. Killua practically flew out of the car and ran inside the building, completely ignoring Gon’s shouts telling him to wait up. 

As he stormed inside, he was instantly met with the cool air of the blasting air conditioning. He let out a breath of relief, the uncomfortable heat washing away from his body at last. 

“Hey, Killua! Why didn’t you wait for me?” Gon called, walking in behind him. 

Killua turned his head to look at him, throwing an arm behind his head and chuckling nervously, “Sorry, I just wanted to—uh, get a head start—at finding our perfect costume—yep.” 

“Okay then,” Gon tilted his head, but brushed off his friend's weird behavior, “anyway, let’s start looking!” 

Killua just smiled and nodded, following the shorter male as he treaded towards one of the more generic costume sections. 

They parted ways as Gon went off to look in the other direction, while Killua stayed behind and looked at the different cop costume variants. 

He glanced over at the female versions, tight black shorts, a navy blue short sleeve low-cut top, a blue police hat, and handcuffs. 

“He’d look so good in this.” Killua whispered, erasing the mental picture from his head, he knew nothing good would come of that—not with these hormones.

“What’d you say?” 

Killua looked over his shoulder, shoulders jumping when he saw how up-close and personal Gon was. 

“Jesus! Don’t scare me like that!” Killua scolded. 

Gon giggled, his laugh sending sparks all throughout Killua’s body.

 “Sorry, but come over here! I found a really sick costume for us!” He beamed as he motioned Killua over to where he was previously looking. 

Gon pointed at two separate bags, a demon costume, and an angel costume, “This one! What do you think?” 

“It’s kind of boring, don’cha think?” Killua raised an eyebrow, smiling as he crossed his arms, “I mean, there’ll probably be at least two other basic bitch duos at the party we’ll be forced to match with.”

“Hm, I guess. But there’s like, barely any options! The world isn’t very considerate of two boy best friends wanting matching costumes.” Gon grumbled, shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants angrily. 

Killua stepped closer, nudging him on the shoulder, “You’ll figure it out, you do every year, c’mon—get creative!” 

“Uhh, okay—what about pirates?” 

“We did that two years ago, Gon.” 

“Damn it!” 

“Relax, there’s plenty more we haven’t seen yet,” Killua reminded him as he placed a hand at the small of Gon’s back, guiding him through the other sections. “We are at a costume store, after all.”

“Yeah, you’re right, we’ll find something.” Gon shrugged.

They looked around for a couple more minutes. Killua suggested Gru and Vector, Mario and Luigi, and—of course, minions. Which ultimately, were all rejected by Gon on account of not looking ‘good’—or—‘cool’ enough. 

When Killua was just about ready to give up for the day, and accept the fact that they would probably have to recycle one of their previous costumes, Gon frantically called him over. 

“What is it?” Killua asked.

“Look! This is perfect!” He cried, pointing at a Dalmatian and fire fighter costume.

Killua stared at it for a moment, a blank expression replacing his smile.

“Gon, I thought we agreed that our costume should be unique.” 

“But—we would look so good!” Gon begged, turning around and stepping closer to Killua. He looked up at him, batting his eyelashes. 

Killua cleared his throat and took a step back, “Okay—well, not only that, but also the fact that these costumes are like—explicitly for couples?” 

“Killuaa, come on, please?” He asked sweetly, taking yet another step closer to match Killua. 

And of course—as per usual, Gon got his way.

‘Even got Killua to pay, too. 

“You’re such a little brat.” Killua grumbled, as he held both of their bags and followed behind Gon. 

“Mhm, whatever you say.” Gon snickered, opening the driver’s door and getting inside. 

The engine turned on with a low rumble, and they were on their way back to Gon’s house.

 The ride was—thankfully, lacking the previous tension, as Gon giggled and rambled on and on about how ‘everyone is gonna be so jealous of their awesome costumes.’

Killua could only chuckle at his rant.

They rushed up the stairs up to Gon’s bedroom—Gon almost tripping over himself out of excitement to try on their costumes. Killua just laughed at the sight; a little exhale through his nose, but a laugh nonetheless.

As soon as they barged inside, Gon immediately shed his shorts and hoodie, leaving himself in just his white tank top, and plaid boxers.

Killua just stared, before he could even try to muster up a coherent sentence.

“Uhh—Gon?”

“Yeah?”

“..Um—nothing.” Killua tried his best to rid his mind of any dirty ideas, then followed in suit of Gon; leaving himself shirtless, the only thing keeping him somewhat decent being his black boxer briefs.

It was normal for him and Gon to change around one another. Hell, Killua’s probably seen Gon’s bare ass a handful of times—so why did it suddenly…feel so weird?

Before he even realized, Gon was fully dressed up—and fuck, he looked beautiful, and wow, so sexy—absolute eye candy. 

He wore a loose shirt; white with black spots, it went over his hips, covering his tight black shorts. Also accompanied by a pair of Dalmatian print knee high socks, and floppy dog ears. 

Killua looked away, focusing on his own outfit. Just looking at Gon felt as if he was allowing himself too much. For crying out loud, he was already having sex fantasies about the guy—the guy with a girlfriend. He needed to take a step back, a really big step. Maybe he needed to take a leap back.

“Do you think it makes me look, uh, too—girly?” Gon asked, his voice a bit hesitant. 

Killua didn’t even look up from the ground as he pulled up the black trousers over his hips, his voice nonchalant as ever; all the while his insides were mere seconds from combusting, “Nah, you look good.” 

Gon stepped out, looking himself up and down in the full-length bathroom mirror. 

“If you say so,” he mumbled as he walked back into the room, eyeing Killua down as if he expected something. 

“What?” Killua laughed, pausing before he could fully finish buttoning up his trousers. 

“Don’t ‘what’ me! Hurry up and finish getting dressed, you’re taking, like, a thousand years!” Gon growled.

“Okay, okay!” Killua’s laughter continued; his voice became more urgent as he swiftly pulled on a white muscle-tank, red suspenders, and a red firefighter hat. 

For just a second, he could have sworn—he saw Gon, biting his bottom lip. 

But just as Killua fully looked up at him, he looked the other way, coughing awkwardly.

Killua tried his best to act like he didn’t notice, saving the moment to painfully overthink later on, “So, do you like it? Are we keeping them?” 

“Hell yeah! We look great. We’re gonna be the best dressed at that party—as usual.” Gon beamed, pride washing over his face. 

Killua gave him a thumbs up, “Cool.” 

Gon watched him with precision, and Killua attempted not to alert Gon that he could a hundred percent feel his eyes on him. 

He unclipped the suspenders, peeled off the white tank top, and shed his trousers, folding it all tight and nice before putting the costume back into the plastic package. 

Gon hadn’t even realized that he was supposed to be stripping his clothes as well. Instead, he was admiring every single fold and stretch of Killua’s biceps as he moved, damn, was his best friend always this jacked? He swallows, as his eyes tread down to—

“Gon?”

“Hm?”

“Are you, uh, gonna keep that on? Orrr..” Killua tilted his head to the side, pulling his hoodie and shorts back over his pale body. 

“Oh—yeah! Sorry, I was just thinking.” 

“Right.” Killua replied dryly, turning around and throwing himself onto Gon’s bed. He turned on his phone, looking for something to distract him from his now almost entirely naked best friend. 

Once Gon was fully decent, wearing his old grey sweatpants and an oversized black t-shirt, he plopped down on his back next to Killua, “So, um, what should I text Retz?”

Killua put his phone down, rolling over onto his back, his head facing the ceiling and very much avoiding eye contact with Gon.

“Huh, just tell her we already bought costumes and we aren’t allowed to return them, or something like that.” He shrugged, “I mean, it is half true.”

Gon rolled over to face Killua, grinning, phone already in his hands, “You always know just the right thing to do, y'know that?” 

“Whatever, just text her already, I’m tired of your whining.” Killua rolled his eyes, did he always know what to do?

“Right,” he nodded, thumbs moving up and all over his phone screen quickly, “I said— ‘I’m sorry, me and Killua already got matching costumes..and we can’t return them’ and then I put a frown emoji, is that fine?” 

“Yeah, now we see if she freaks out or not.” He joked, placing a hand on Gon’s shoulder. 

Gon brushed him off, shouting—“don’t scare me! I’m already terrified of what she’ll say.” 

Killua just smiled, letting his hand fall back down to his side. 

His smile faded, though, as the room grew quiet. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, by any means; it was actually pretty comforting. It left Killua to his thoughts for a moment. 

Was it true? That no matter what, he always knew just the right thing to do? The right course of action? 

If it was, why did he feel so helpless when it came to his newfound feelings (if you could even call them that) towards Gon? 

Damn, could he just ignore this? Lock it away in the deepest parts of his soul—how he does with almost every thing that troubled him? It wasn’t healthy, sure, but it was better than coming to terms with being attracted to your own best friend. 

His own best friend, who was undoubtedly straight, and who was undoubtedly in love with another person, another woman. 

“Oh, look! She texted back!” Gon suddenly gasped, opening the message, the look in his eyes going blank.

“What?” 

“Uh, she said—‘Please Gon?? You and Killua match every year, just save the costumes for next year’, what do I say?” 

Killua paused for a moment, “Uh, say that I don’t have the money for another costume.” 

About a minute went by, “Okay, she just said ‘fine’, you think she’s mad?” 

“Pfft, probably—but don’t sweat it, she’ll get over it.” Killua reassured, reaching his hand up to Gon’s head and running his fingers through strands of thick, silky black hair.

Gon visibly softened under the touch, relaxing every bone in his body as Killua reached his other hand over and began braiding his hair, just how he liked—no—loved it. 

“Mmm, you’re right.” Gon purred, eyes shutting.

Killua admired the sight in front of him for a moment—Gon’s beautiful face.

Gon’s thick, long, fluttering eyelashes. They were so much prettier in comparison to his own; straight with blonde tips—making them look even shorter than they were.

His tan island skin, compared to Killua’s own pale porcelain appearance; bringing so much contrast in between the two of them when they touched.

The way a dimple would form on the right side of his face as he smiled, the way tiny light mocha freckles clustered and scattered throughout his nose and cheeks.

How come he’d never taken a moment to just admire the sheer beauty of his own best friend?

More importantly, why was he doing it now?

As Gon eased more and more into the touch, Killua quickly pulled away, earning a very unhappy whine from Gon. Still, he couldn’t let himself get sucked into this—definitely not when he knows what dark places his mind would drag him off to. 

“Why’d you stop?” Gon grumbled, eyes still shut as Killua sat up right. 

“Sorry—I just, uh, I should probably head back home now, it’s almost six,” he sighed, then chuckled awkwardly, “I don’t wanna be tired in class tomorrow, you know how it is.”

The shorter boy frowned, lips parting as he let out a yawn. He reached his arms over his head in a stretch, the hem of his shirt rising with it—exposing just a few inches of skin. Not a word, though. 

Killua quickly shot up the bed and cleared his throat when he caught himself staring shamelessly, “so, uh, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Gon quickly followed, tugging on Killua’s sleeve, “I’ll walk you home!”

“I drove here. Remember?” Killua spun around, stopping Gon right in his tracks, “it’s fine, honestly—either way, uh, I don’t really want Illumi to know I was with you just now, you know how that’ll end up.”

“Oh, yeah,” Gon looked up, “so, um, call me later?” 

“Will do. You know, if I’m not busy doing stuff.” Killua grinned, quickly granting Gon a goodbye hug. 

Then running down the stairs, waving goodbye to Mito, then out the door, and into his car. 

While the engine fired up, he dropped his head onto the steering wheel in defeat. 

“What am I doing?” He muttered.

He kept it there for a moment, before finally getting himself together and finally backing out of Gon’s driveway. The short journey back to the Zoldyck estate was going to feel like an eternity with all these lingering thoughts. 

Did Gon bite his lip when he looked at Killua all dressed up? 

Was Gon staring a little too long? 

Was he staring a little too long himself?

Making a brisk right turn, he reached up to the CarPlay screen to skip the current song—when a text message appeared on screen; a text from an unsaved number. 

Stopping at a red light, he quickly unlocked his phone and took a look at what it said.

‘hi Killua! It’s Retz, Gon gave me your number a few days ago :)’

Then,

‘can we talk? maybe in person if that’s fine with you? don’t say anything to gon please it’s nothing bad I swear’

He only realized he’d been stopped at a green light when an angry driver had honked at him from behind.

Chapter Text

   
     Sure, the text was as innocent as it could be, and sure, Retz had no real bad reason to want to have a talk with Killua. 

…Except—she did. 

As of recently; Killua was absolutely losing his shit even at the mere thought of Gon. But there was absolutely no way she could know that, zero—zilch.

Unless Gon maybe noticed, and maybe said something. 

But Gon would have talked to Killua if he had noticed anything. So it’s impossible Retz would know anything at all.

Killua groaned loudly, it felt as if he had butterflies in his stomach—that is, if the butterflies were all simultaneously exploding inside of him. 

He backed into his driveway, then switched the gear to park and turned off the engine. Killua let out a long, exasperated sigh, then picked up his phone. 

He reread the messages for a minute—‘can we talk? maybe in person if that’s fine with you? don’t say anything to gon please it’s nothing bad I swear’

After a few minutes of uselessly staring at his phone screen, he decided on a reply. Short and simple:

‘Hi Retz. That’s fine with me, let me know when.’

A dose of adrenaline shot through his body as he clicked send. Killua quickly shoved his phone in his pockets, grabbing his keys and finally leaving his car to enter his home.

He felt his pocket vibrate, but put all of his effort into ignoring it while he struggled to unlock the door. Hopefully Illumi would do something to piss him off, anything to get his mind off of this.

He examined the living room as he took off his shoes, looking for any signs of Illumi or Milluki.

Unfortunately for Killua, both brothers were nowhere to be seen; and Illumi’s car wasn’t in the garage. Great, the one day Killua had actually hoped for his pestering older brothers to distract him with something stupid. 

“Big brother!” He heard a sweet voice that was undoubtedly Alluka’s call out from the kitchen.

“Hi Alluka, hey Kalluto.” Killua waved, stepping closer towards the two. Kalluto didn’t respond verbally, just half-smiled and waved. 

“Wanna play cards with us? We just started, and it’s more fun with three people!” She offered. 

Killua put a hand up, waving her off and leaning against the wall, “Nah, I’m pretty beat; Gon forced me out shopping today.” 

“What for?” Kalluto asked, while Alluka grumbled under her breath. 

“Nothing too important, just our costumes for this party we’re going to Friday night.” Killua shrugged.

Alluka glanced back up at him, a playful grin spreading across her face. 

Killua raised an eyebrow, “What?”

“Did you see Gon in any sexy outfits?” 

Killua choked, “Jesus.”

“Just an honest question.” She smiled, Kalluto giggled behind her.

“Okay. I might have thought about it. Not a lot of actual seeing, though.” Killua admitted. 

“Mm, so you finally confess to having it bad for your best friend?” She sneered. 

“I didn’t say that,” Killua shot back defensively, “I can just appreciate a good looking guy—can’t we all?”

“Ugh, whatever, go to sleep already.” Alluka rolled her eyes, returning to her game with Kalluto. Killua smiled and turned away to make his way towards his room. 

He closed the door gently behind him, throwing his keys on his desk and laid down horizontally on his bed. Killua reluctantly pulled his phone back out, reading Retz’ text—who had responded almost immediately.

‘I’ll text you tomorrow sometime during school and we can meet up, does that sound good to you?’

Killua decided that he wouldn’t reply; and just liked the message instead—hoping that she would get the memo.

He slapped both hot hands onto his even hotter forehead. If things keep up like this, his heart may as well end up beating right out of his chest.

The next morning, when Gon crashed down in the desk next to Killua’s—Killua couldn’t even bear to look him in the eye. The thought of Gon being on to him and his suspicious behavior was absolutely terrifying. They were best friends, after all; Gon could probably read him like an open book by now. 

Fuck, he knows. Of course he knows. How would something like this be left unnoticed by Gon? Sure, he couldn’t figure out what six times four was without a calculator—but he could sure as hell figure out even what Killua was thinking just by taking a single glance at his face.

“Killua? You’re being really quiet, is something wrong?” Gon asked, leaning in a little bit too close for comfort. 

“Me? Uh, I’m fine. Just a stomach ache.” Killua lied, as he felt his entire body heating up from the proximity.

Gon just eyed him suspiciously for a few seconds, but eventually went back to scribbling on his worksheet without a word. 

The rest of the class went by in silence between the two, which was undoubtedly worrying Gon—but he knew better than to press his snappy best friend when they were in public. So he let it go, hoping Killua was just in a bad mood this morning.

When their lunch period finally came around, Killua excused himself to go to the bathroom where he and Retz had planned to meet earlier this morning. Somehow, he had managed to convince Gon into staying behind—claiming he had a really bad stomach ache, and that Gon really did not want to follow him.

Retz was already standing by the water fountain when Killua got there, fidgeting slightly with the bracelet stack on her left wrist. When Killua began to approach her, she perked up, plastering a nervous smile across her face—causing him to grow even more anxious about what she could possibly be wanting to talk about. 

Retz was smiling at him? What a legendary moment, someone should take a picture. There’s no telling when something like this would happen again. 

He silently chuckled to himself at the thought, calming his nerves just a smidge. 

Killua cleared his throat, “So, what did you, uh, wanna talk to me about?”

“You sound really nervous.” She spoke.

“So do you, and to be fair; I don’t think you exactly like me.” Killua rolled his eyes. 

Retz tilted her head to the side, “I like you. What gives you the impression that I wouldn’t?” 

“Is that a joke?” 

“What—no—whatever, I need to get back to class soon, so could you try and not be petty, and just hear me out?”

“I’m listening.” He shrugged, a glint of anxiousness returning to his previously cocky tone. 

She sighed, “Okay, um, just try not to freak out about it, okay?” 

“I want to get back to lunch, just get out with it already.” Killua crossed his arms and leaned on the wall behind him.

“Okay, um, how do I put this?” Retz scrambled, “is there um—I mean—are you positive that nothing is going on between you and uh—you know. Gon.” 

Upon hearing her words, Killua felt his face heat up, and the explosive butterflies returned to his stomach—it was times like these that he cursed his painfully pale complexion. There was no doubt in his mind his face had just flashed through ten different shades of pink and red.

“Killua? Sorry, this is really sudden, but um, your face isn’t really giving me any good signs right now.” Retz mumbled. 

“That’s not—no. What? There’s nothing going on between me and,” he paused, swallowing heavily before finishing his sentence, “Gon.”

“Do you have any feelings for him?” She blurted, “Before you answer—it’s okay if you do, I just um, need to know.” 

“I don’t feel anything for Gon, except the feeling that he’s my best friend. Are you done?” Killua hissed defensively. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just that—I’ve noticed a lot of things. You guys are really close, and the um, the kiss.” Retz began again, “If there is something going on, please, just tell me. I like Gon. A lot. I think I might even, y’know, love him.”

“Okay.”

“And because of that, I don’t want to stand in the way of his happiness. I know he could be stubborn sometimes—and maybe he doesn’t really know what he wants right now. And maybe if you’re what’s best for him—”

“Retz,” Killua interrupted, “Gon also likes you, a lot. I can tell. We aren’t doing anything behind your back, I promise. Gon is the kindest person I know, and he wouldn’t do that to someone he cares about. I also, um, love Gon, like a crap ton, but just as my bestfriend—and this is so embarrassing to talk about. Can we be done now?” 

Retz looked back up at him with a smile, “Yeah, sorry. I just needed some reassurance, it’s kind of hard to talk to Gon about it without feeling a little silly, thank you.” 

“Yeah, it’s whatever, don’t worry about it.”

“Okay, yeah, and I’m sorry about, y’know, the passive aggression, I just felt a little threatened by you, as embarrassing as it is to admit.” She laughed, dragging her thumb up and down her forearm, “It’d also be great if you didn’t tell Gon about this.”

“I won’t tell if you don’t.” He shrugged.

“Then it’s settled! I’m happy we had this talk, I’ll let you go now.” 

“Yep, see ‘ya.” Killua quickly replied, before speed walking away, finally letting go of his composure as he turned the corner, “What the fuck just happened?” 

At least he knows that Gon hasn’t caught on—most likely.

…And if he had, at least he wasn’t so bothered about it that he felt the need to talk to Retz about it.

When he returned to the lunch table, his cheeks were still flushed—and a glint of sweat glistened on the part of his forehead that was left uncovered by his bangs. 

“Killua, are you okay? Do you feel better?” Gon asked sweetly, as Killua slipped into the spot next to him, throwing his arm around Gon’s shoulder. 

“Yeah dude, I’m fine now.” He smiled. 

“All that sweet shit is finally catching up to you, huh?” Meleoreon laughed, Ikalgo snorted at his comment. 

“I could say that about your damn Taco Bell addiction, keep it up and you’ll look like a bowling ball by the time you’re twenty-five.” Killua shot back, earning two laughs of approval from Ikalgo and Gon. 

“Okay, okay, guys, stop arguing. Look, Zushi’s coming over here.” Ikalgo pointed out, causing the rest of the group to turn their heads.

“Hey.” Zushi greeted, as he sat down next to Meleoreon.

“What’s up?” Gon grinned.

“Nothing much, I haven’t sat with you guys in a while is all.” Zushi shrugged.

“So what? You’re too cool for us?” Killua teased, pulling Gon closer at his shoulder.

“Nah, it’s just embarrassing watching you guys be all over one another,” Zushi rolled his eyes, then turned to look at Meleoreon and Ikalgo, “Seriously, I don’t know how you guys do it.”

“Excuse me? What’s that supposed to mean?” Killua growled, somehow managing to keep the heat from rising to his face. 

“Oh, nothing at all.” Zushi said sarcastically, “Anyway, how’s Friday night looking? You guys going to Meruem’s?” 

“I’m going, I’d never miss one of Meruem’s parties—the dude’s house is like, a castle.” Meleoron hooted. 

“Yeah, I’ll probably be there. I might have some plans with friends from my hometown, so we’ll see.” Ikalgo shrugged.

Zushi turned his head back to Killua and Gon, “What about you guys?”

“Oh, yeah, we’re going! You guys are gonna love our costume.” Gon boasted.

“What’re you guys going as?” Ikalgo questioned.

“We’re gonna—” Killua began, but was interrupted by a jab in the side from Gon, “Hey! Why’d you do that?” 

“It’s supposed to be a secret! Everyone will find out at the party.” Gon declared, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Jeez, okay, fine whatever.” Killua rolled his eyes, trying his best to resist his smile.

When the rest of the group erupted back into conversation, Killua remained silent. How could he be in a good mood right now? After what Retz told him? And how he had lied straight through his teeth, despite how nice she was being to him? 

Sure, he didn’t feel bad about it before—but that was because Retz was, well, Retz. This was a kinder side of her, that Killua hadn’t seen before; and it was eating him alive.

Not only was the situation absolutely swallowing him whole; but he had nobody to talk to about it. Gon was always the person that helped him through every little thing that troubled him, even when Killua didn’t want him to. But this was something he could never tell Gon about, not when their entire friendship was at stake.

If Killua told him what was going on, things would never be the same—everything would be all awkward and messy.

This is the worst situation he’s ever been in. Yeah, sure, Killua has had crushes on countless straight guys in his past, guys he didn’t have chances with—but none of them were ever truly that important to him, at least not as important as Gon is. Not even close.

As well as the fact that he could just simply push those people out of his life, and eventually any trace of romantic feelings would fade away. He couldn’t ever do that to Gon, not only for Gon’s sake, but also that ever since Gon entered his life, Killua couldn’t imagine it without him by his side.

When the school day came to an end, and the last dismissal bell finally rang—Killua couldn’t help but feel guilty when Gon came running up to his car with a big grin on his face. He felt even guiltier when he found himself once again admiring the boy's radiance.

“Killua! Can I get a ride? Mito needed the car today, and Knuckle already left..” Gon pleaded with a slight pout of his pink plump lips.

“Can’t you go with Retz?” Killua asked, tilting his head to the side as he threw his backpack inside.

“You don’t want me to come with you?” Gon asked, his tone more timid than before.

Killua winced when he realized how cold he’d come off, “No, I do—sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I just thought Retz would like it better if you went with her? You’ve been spending a lot more time with me than you have been with her,” he paused for a moment, “and uh, maybe you should hang out with her instead, since we’re already going to the party together—I’m sure she’s not all that happy about that.” 

Gon cleared his throat as he nervously fiddled with his backpack strap, “Oh, um, I guess, when you put it that way.. yeah. Uh, so I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

“Yeah, I’ll see you. Have fun.” Killua smiled weakly, quickly ruffling his fingers through Gon’s dark hair, before saying goodbye and getting into the driver's seat. 

He knew it made Gon upset, but it made Killua feel slightly better about how he’d been acting as of late.

..Like a total horny freak with a crush on his best friend, who also had a girlfriend.

When he had made it back to his room, just when he decided that this was something he would definitely have to keep to himself. As well as the fact that this would definitely be keeping him up at night for the next couple of months—he got a text from someone he hadn’t even thought about talking to—Kurapika.

‘Hey Killua, me and Leorio wanted to know if you and Gon are gonna be at Meruem’s party Friday? I texted Gon, but it seems that he doesn’t have his phone at the moment.’

Kurapika, of course. He could talk to Kurapika about how he was feeling—sure, it’d be awkward. Regardless, Kurapika was usually the most rational one within their group, and he could a hundred percent keep a secret; unlike Leorio—or frankly anyone else he could have talked to. 

He texted back quickly, completely ignoring Kurapika’s question in the process: ‘can I come over rlly quick I have something super important to talk abt’

Within seconds, he received another message from a probably very confused Kurapika: ‘???sure??’, and Killua replied with a simple ‘omw’ (after struggling with it autocorrecting to ‘On my way!’ a couple times, of course.)

Given that Kurapika and Leorio lived in an off campus apartment building just a few minutes away from their university, Killua arrived in the parking lot a brisk ten minutes after—also given the fact that he was very much speeding, but a quick drive nonetheless.

When the receptionist had given him the OK to make his way up to their apartment, Killua had practically banged on the door before Kurapika let him in—panic in his face as a result of Killua’s urgency. 

“Kurapika, we need to talk—very important, is Leorio home?” 

“Uh, no, does he need to hear this as well?” Kurapika raised an eyebrow, closing the door behind Killua and following him into the kitchen, where he sat down behind the island. 

“No, just the opposite, he can’t know about this. Actually, nobody can, for that matter.” Killua declared with utmost seriousness in his tone.

Kurapika poured Killua a cup of iced water, sliding it his way as he spoke, “Okay, my lips are sealed. What’s up?” 

Killua left the water untouched, instead messing with his hoodie strings as a way to cope with his nerves, “Um, sorry, it’s kind of hard to talk about.”

“I won’t judge,” Kurapika assured him, “but take your time.” 

“Okay—yeah, um.” Killua stammered, “Recently, uh, I’ve been having some..y’know…feelings..towards Gon.”

Kurapika raised an eyebrow, “Feelings?”

“Um, like, God this is so embarrassing.” He cried, letting his face fall into his palms. 

“I’m not teasing you, am I? Just explain to me what you mean so I can try my best to help you out.” Kurapika explained sweetly.

“Yeah, I know, I just have a hard time..with uh, this kind of stuff,” Killua admitted, “I had, um, a dream about Gon. You know, like, a dirty dream.”

“A sex dream?” Kurapika asked, with no trace of judgment, disappointment, or even disgust on his face.

“Ugh, please don’t say it like that. I’m already embarrassed enough.” He groaned.

“Right, sorry, I won’t be so blunt.” Kurapika chuckled, “is that it?”

“You’re making it sound like it’s not a big deal,” Killua rolled his eyes, “but no, that’s not it.”

“I’m listening.”

“I’ve just, you know, it’s been kind of awkward recently—it’s like he's gotten ten times more attractive in the last seventy-two hours. Every time I’m around him, I get all hot and bothered; and it’s seriously fucking with me.” Killua groaned, “Not to mention the fact Retz just had a whole talk with me about ‘what’s going on between me and Gon’ and I absolutely just lied straight to her face about it all.” 

Kurapika looked stunned for a moment, before returning to his usual calm demeanor, “Wow, uh, that’s a lot.”

“I know, sorry for coming to you with all this—but obviously I can’t tell Gon, and I can’t think of anyone else who could give me better advice.” 

“No, it’s fine. I’m happy you trust me with this.” Kurapika smiled kindly, “Is it possible you have a crush on Gon? Or are you, um, how do I say this—just thinking with your dick?”

“Kurapika, seriously!” Killua whined, covering his face with his hands once again. 

“Sorry, what I mean is—is it just you being sexually attracted to Gon, or are there real feelings behind it?” 

“I don’t know! That’s why I came to you!” 

Kurapika pursed his lips, “Okay, um, let’s see, what do you think about Gon? Tell me how you feel.”

“Gon? Well, he’s, uhh, shit.” Killua struggled painfully. 

“Do you want me to turn around? Maybe it’ll be better if you can’t see my face.” Kurapika suggested.

Killua’s throat tightened,  “Um, yeah, maybe let’s try that.” 

Kurapika nodded as he turned around to face the other way, “Go ahead and tell me.”

“Right, um, Gon. He’s nice, and I like him—obviously, he’s my best friend. But like, he’s really sweet. Sometimes, I feel like I don’t even deserve his friendship, y’know? Like, we’re basically polar opposites. But I still admire him, I wouldn’t say there’s anything I don’t like about him—even how stubborn he is, I like everything about him. He’s so bright and bubbly, he practically lights up a room when he walks in. He might as well be light itself. Also—how once he sets his heart on something, he won’t give up until he accomplishes it, unlike me, who usually gives up if I feel like something is out of reach. Should I um, stop now?” Killua paused, after realizing Kurapika might be getting tired of his blabbering. 

“No, go ahead, I’m still listening.”

“Okay. Uh, he always knows what to say to me—when something happens with my family, when something or someone upsets me, he’s always there for me. He makes me really happy, and I always somehow end up forgetting all about my worries when we’re together. He’s also—well—you know, like, really beautiful. Honestly, I’m surprised more girls don’t drool over him. I mean, his tan skin, the perfect shade of olive. The freckles on his face just top it off, as if he wasn’t already gorgeous enough. And his eyes, too—the way they glisten whenever he talks about something he’s passionate about.” Killua rambled on, waiting for Kurapika to say something reassuring.

“Go on.” 

“Yeah, right, um, his voice always manages to soothe me—and God, his lips—the perfect shade of pink, I still remember how soft they were after all this time, and since a couple days ago, it’s felt like they’re some sort of holy grail I need in order to survive. Actually, it feels like Gon himself is the holy grail I need, he’s like oxygen. Shit, I couldn’t live without him. It’s like he’s the cure to anything that’s ever been wrong with me. Gon is..the only one I ever wanna be around—the only one I ever wanna touch. Does any of this even make sense?” Killua chuckled, almost forgetting about the fact he was professing his feelings for Gon to Kurapika.

Then—something hit him.

“Holy shit, Kurapika, am I in love with Gon?”

He turned back around, looking Killua in the eye pitifully, “In all honesty, I think you might be.” 

“Of course I am. It’s right up my alley to be unlucky enough to fall head over heels in love with someone like Gon, fuck—damn it.” He cursed, grabbing a chunk of his hair and pulling at it in frustration. 

“You should talk to Gon about this.” 

“Did you get hit in the head? The whole reason I’m here is because I can’t talk to Gon about this!” Killua exasperated. 

“Killua, what else do you want me to say to you?” Kurapika sighed.

“I don’t know, anything but that!”

“You are in love with your best friend, Gon, therefore, you need to talk to said best friend about it—or your situation is only going to get worse, trust me.”

“You don’t understand, I can’t.” Killua repeated.

“I did, and look where it got me, living happily with the man I love.” Kurapika rolled his eyes sarcastically, smiling. 

“That is so different, and you know it! Gon has a girlfriend, for crying out loud!” Killua reminded him, slamming his fist on the marble counter.

“Gon doesn’t always know exactly what he wants.” Kurapika stated, doubling down. 

“No, he knows what he wants. And it’s not me.” 

“You couldn’t possibly know that for sure.”

“What I know for sure is that I’m not going to talk to him about it, and I just need a way to block it out of my life, and I need your help. Will you help me or not?” Killua huffed.

Kurapika sighed in disappointment, “I’m not going to help you ignore your feelings, but if it ever becomes too much for you—just call me, alright? I’ll try my best to answer anytime I can.” 

“Whatever, thanks I guess, even though you didn’t really do much helping.” Killua muttered sarcastically, “I think I just need to go to the gym, get my mind off of all this, um, stuff.” 

“With Gon?”

Killua snorted, “Pfft, and what? Spot his squats?”

“I mean, whatever floats your boat.” He shrugged.

“Ugh, stop talking please.” Killua groaned, “But, um, seriously, thanks for hearing me out, I know this probably doesn’t concern you all that much.” 

“It’s no problem, really. In all honesty, me and Leorio have been betting on this happening for years now.” Kurapika admitted with a short laugh. 

“Funny, I’ll see you at the party.” Killua let out a fake laugh, before he waved Kurapika goodbye and slipped out the door.

Killua was—unquestionably—smitten. His doubts were now slim to none; causing him to panic even more. 

What he needed now was a very long gym session to distract him from his very sticky situation. 

This would be great, right?

…Was what he thought when he walked through the doors of the Heavens Arena gym—only to see Gon and Zushi messing around on the smiths machine. As he was just seconds from turning around and sprinting out the door, he heard a voice he knew all too well call out his name. 

What could he have possibly done to be punished this way? Was it because he beheaded half of Milluki’s funko pop collection? Surely not, he had it coming anyway. Regardless, whatever Kilkua could have possibly done—nothing could compare to the pure torture he was about to be put through. 

Gon quickly rushed over, leaving Zushi behind to finish his set, “Killua! How come you didn’t tell me you’d be here this afternoon?” 

Killua stared at him for a second, quickly admiring the immaculate pump in his biceps—highlighted with sweat and exposed by his white muscle tank, he coughed nonchalantly when he realized he was staring, “Oh, yeah, it wasn’t exactly planned, but uh, aren’t you supposed to be with Retz right now?”

“Nah, she went with Palm to buy some last minute things for her costume. So me and Zushi decided to get in a nice workout.” Gon smiled, running a hand through his hair, moving it out of the way of his sweaty forehead, “anyway, come join us! You probably have more gym experience than the both of us combined, y’know.” 

“Uh, sure, I didn’t really bring anything though, like I said, it was last minute. So I don’t know how long I’ll stay here with you guys.” Killua spoke, following Gon back to where he had originally left Zushi. 

“It’s fine! I brought a water bottle, and a couple of towels, you can use my stuff.” Gon beamed.

Zushi was busy benching a bar with two forty-five pound plates on each side. Which, including the bar, racked up to about two-hundred and ten pounds. Seemingly impressive, if it weren’t for the fact that Killua could bench three-hundred and twenty, which he would definitely be showing off later.

Once Zushi sat up, he wiped the sweat off his face with the hem of his t-shirt with a big exhale, “Hey Killua, you gonna stick around and workout with us?”

“I guess, yeah, Gon would probably throw a tantrum if I didn’t, knowing him.” Killua joked.

“I can hear you!” Gon exclaimed.

He laughed, his silver hair falling back over his eyes, “You know I’m just kidding. Zushi, are you done with your set?”

“Nah, not yet, feel free to go on and do your own thing, though, I don’t need a spot or anything.” Zushi assured the two of them.

“Sure, Gon, let’s hit the free weights.” Killua called behind him, as he already began to make his way towards the large rack of free weights, all black and varying in size.

“Sure!” Gon replied as he followed, sitting on a bench behind Killua, who was already carefully picking out a pair of forty pound weights.

“You think ‘ya could handle these?” Killua smirked, almost giving Gon the impression that he was being teased.

“Hah! Of course I can, hand ‘em over!” He declared proudly, taking the weights from Killua—his hands immediately dropping a level lower.

Killua raised an eyebrow, his smile only widening, “What was that?”

“Aw, shush, I was caught off guard, this isn’t all that heavy.” Gon grumbled, getting in a position to begin a set of hammer curls. 

Killua grabbed his own weights, a pair of fifties, then sat down on the bench right next to Gon—who was clearly struggling. A few strained groans came through his lips; causing Killua to struggle in his own way.

This was supposed to get Killua’s mind off of the fact that he had it bad for his best friend, damn it, not whatever the hell this is.

After a few minutes of Killua paying more attention to the sweet noises that were escaping Gon’s lips rather than his own workout, Gon finally spoke again. 

“I think I’m done with these for today, how about I go try the smiths machine? The one Zushi was in is free now, I think he went over to the cardio machines.” Gon suggested, putting his weights back in their places.

Killua soon followed suit, stretching his arm across his chest right after, “Sure, uh, what’re you gonna do?” 

If Gon had asked him to spot his squat—Killua would have certainly evaporated on the spot. 

Thankfully, it wasn’t in Gon’s agenda today to torment Killua with his abrupt fuck-ability.

“I wanna try a bench press, do you think you could spot me?” 

Killua nodded, silently thanking the Gods above, “Yeah, I’ll help out, let’s go.”

Unfortunately for him, he had let his guard down too soon. Because this was just as bad—if not worse—than spotting Gon’s squat. Damn it, why is it all of a sudden that every little thing is so painfully inappropriate? Why did Killua’s heart skip a beat when a trail of water trickled down Gon’s lips to his chin as he drank from his water bottle? Life surely wasn’t this sexy just a week ago. 

Killua swallowed hard as he stood over Gon, hovering his fingertips right next to Gon’s biceps, pulling and enlarging as he moved the bar up and down. Even though his hands should be under the bar—luckily for Killua, he didn't seem to be struggling yet, as he was only benching about eighty pounds. So it really didn’t matter if he was rewarding himself with a little stray physical contact.

And damn, he looked as alluring as ever. His amber eyes focused straight ahead, his lips slightly swollen from his heavy breathing. Was it really safe for Killua to be spotting him when he was completely and utterly distracted by how hot his stomach was getting at the sight of Gon under him? Maybe he should make up some excuse, and switch out with Zushi. 

Then again, it was a great sight to see. 

“Killua? Can you add a couple more plates?” Gon asked, placing the bar back on the handles and letting his arms drop down, fingertips almost grazing the gym floor.

He moved to the side, grabbing two plates, “Yeah, you want me to add two forty-fives?” 

“Try four, this is too easy.” 

“Uh, okay, whatever you say.” Killua hesitated for a beat, then placed two forty five pound plates on each side of the bar, “Alright, ready?” 

“Are you?” 

“Yep, go ahead, I got you.” Killua assured, this time his hands went to hover just under the bar.

 Gon picked it up—grunting a little this time, causing Killua’s breath to falter for just a second.

“Wow, damn, this is—really heavy.” He admitted, his voice slightly strained. 

“Do you want me to take some weight off?” Killua offered.

“I think I just need a break for a few minutes, gym ratting is hard, I don’t know how you do this all the time.” Gon exhaled loudly, placing the bar back in its spot and sitting up.

“Sure, take as much time as you need. Do you mind if I get a few sets in?” 

“Not at all, ‘ya need a spot?” Gon asked, getting up as Killua took his place.

“Nope, but it’d be nice if you could add two more forty fives, I wanna hit a new personal record today.” Killua said proudly.

“Got it!” Gon cheered, following Killua’s request and placing a forty five pound plate on each side of the bar, then immediately shooting his hands right under the bar.

“Gon, I told you I don’t need a spot, spotters are for dummies who don’t know what they’re doing.” Killua rolled his eyes.

“Not true! It’s always safe to have a spot, especially when you’re trying to hit a new PR, Killua.” Gon reprimanded.

“Ugh, okay, whatever.” He grumbled, “I’m gonna try doing four sets of ten, can you count me off? I’ll have a hard time counting in my head.”

“Yep, I’ll keep track, you just focus on your form.” Gon nodded.

“Right, thanks.” Killua replied, shifting his eyes to the bar above him, letting out a breath, and taking an even deeper one—before lifting the bar and bringing it down to his chest, then back up again. Groaning a few times out of the muscle strain.

Gon counted him off in his head as he finished the first set, “That’s ten!” 

“Damn, that might be it for me, that’s heavy.” Killua admitted, purring the bar back and pushing his hair back. 

“Come on! Just one more set, I believe in you!” Gon encouraged, clapping his hands.

“Uh, I’ll try, but then you better take your job as my spot seriously as ever.” 

“I thought you said spotters were for dummies who don’t know what they’re doing?” Gon teased, chuckling.

“Shut up, this is different.” Killua hissed, picking the bar back up with a grunt. 

Gon began counting him down, noticing the pained look on Killua’s face—and deciding to offer some words of encouragement to keep him going strong. 

“That’s good, Killua, just like that.” Gon spoke, making Killua completely forget how to breathe for a second—before finally once again regaining his composure. 

“Good job, you’re doing so good, Killua!” He continued, painfully unaware of how his words were affecting Killua—and how he’d probably never wanted to fuck Gon more than he did now—but it was definitely messing with his ability to lift the heavy bar. As well as giving him the most intense boner he’d had in a long time.

“Gon, kindlypleaseshutthefuckup before I drop this weight on my gorgeous face.” 

“Wouldn’t want that happening.”

“Gon.”

“Sorry! I’ll shut up now.” He giggled, and Killua went back to his set—finishing his last rep.

“Yeah, okay, I’m seriously done now, if I do one more I think my arms will give out on me.” Killua sighed, quickly moving his hands to cover his crotch with the bottom of his hoodie, just as soon as he placed the bar down. 

“Aw, okay, you still did great!” Gon cheered.

Killua felt his throat getting tighter again, “Uh, yeah, thanks Gon, I think I should get going now.” 

“Already? You just got here!” He whined.

“I told you, coming here was kind of spontaneous—and I wasn’t intending on staying all that long. Plus, we’ll practically be hanging out all day tomorrow, so it’s not that big of a deal that I leave a little early.”

“Okay, I’ll tell Zushi you said bye. Text me when you’re home, okay?” 

“I will, see ‘ya.” Killua waved, grabbing his phone and keys, then leaving the gym.

How was he supposed to be around Gon at all if they can’t even work out together without Killua getting a boner?

Killua cursed all of his past decisions that led him up to where he was now: horribly in love with his very straight and very taken best friend, Gon. 

Chapter Text

     Unfortunately for Killua, the day of the party he had oh so been dreading had finally come—what was even more unfortunate? The fact that the party was still hours away, and he was already at Gon’s house; the man who Killua had realized he was in love with not even twenty four hours prior.

Seeing Gon in itself had been nothing but trouble as of recently, but at his house, in his room, and more importantly—alone? True torture. 

He listened to the drowned out sound of water running from outside the bathroom door. Gon was taking painfully long, which was both a curse and a blessing for Killua.

Because for one, the suspense is killing him—but second, how would he even react to watching Gon come out of the shower? He’d done it plenty of times in the past, but things were different now; at least within Killua’s mind.

It was now six-thirty, meaning they had about an hour before the party started—but they planned on being fashionably late, of course.

Killua eventually decided that he’d start getting ready now, just little by little, so there wouldn’t be much rush later on. 

Then—he remembered. Gon didn’t even have a mirror in his room, and he was still hogging the bathroom. 

Killua groaned loudly, marching up to the bathroom door, banging on it a couple times, “Gon! How much longer? What, did you drown in there?”

“Don’t yell at me! I wanna look beautiful!” Gon shouted back, his voice lightly muffled.

“Well hurry it up, I need the bathroom too!” Killua grumbled, walking back into Gon’s room, crashing down on his bed.

He ended up passing the time by playing some retro game on his phone. All the way up until he finally heard the water shut off, and the door knob twist open—revealing a practically naked Gon, with nothing but a dangerously small white towel wrapped around his waist. Killua looked up at him for a second; but immediately regretted it when he felt the blood rushing to his face—his cheeks were as hot as the sun and as red as a freshly picked apple.

Christ, this guy was a tease—so much so that Killua had begun wondering if Gon was actually doing it on purpose, just to spite some sort of reaction out of him.

Gon’s hair was dripping water onto his shoulders, steam was coming off of beautiful tan skin; almost making it look like he was oozing a thin aura. Genuinely, a beautiful sight to see. If Killua hadn't been so shameful about all of his actions, he would have definitely indulged in a couple more sneak-peaks. If he had been as shameless as Gon? He probably wouldn’t even attempt to be sneaky about it.

Killua quickly looked back down at his phone and attempted to keep his nonchalant demeanor, when Gon flopped down on the bed, right next to Killua; who was pressed up against the wall side, wearing no shirt and pink shorts that just barely touched his knees.

“I think that was the hottest shower I’ve ever taken, I feel like I just took a lava bath.” Gon whined, shutting his eyes. 

Then he began to slide his hand over to the towel, slowly unwrapping—

“Gon!” Killua screamed, making Gon jolt.

“Jeez! You’re so loud,” he mumbled, “what?”

“What are you doing? Go put some clothes on, you nudist.” Killua hissed, mustering all the power he had to not look at Gon’s almost entirely exposed body. 

“Aren’t you gonna go shower?”

“No, I’ll shower after the party, I’ll probably get all gross there anyway. I want to go to sleep clean tonight.” Killua replied.

Gon nodded and stood up, walking over to his dresser and grabbing a pair of dark red boxers and green shorts. He stepped back into the bathroom and shut the door behind him, emerging a few seconds later fully dressed, with a smaller towel around his shoulders.

“Well, the bathroom is all yours now.” 

Killua let his phone fall down on the bed as he stood up, making his way to where Gon stood, “Thanks, you should start getting ready too, though.”

Gon shrugged, “I’ll probably wait for my hair to dry off a little, I don’t want my costume to get dripped on.” 

He raised his eyebrows and closed his eyes approvingly, opening them back up immediately after, “Fair point.” 

Gon laughed as he followed Killua into the bathroom, sitting on the counter next to him as Killua carefully observed himself in the mirror—while Gon carefully observed him.

“What?” Killua asked, feeling a little self conscious.

“How come you’re getting ready this early? All you really have to do is put your costume on.” 

“Clearly, you’ve never seen me get ready.” Killua rolled his eyes.

“You look the same as always.” Gon continued to press.

“I’m choosing to ignore that comment.” 

“No, it’s a good thing! You look hot.” He quickly blurted.

A moment of silent eye contact passed before Killua cleared his throat, “What?”

“What?” Gon said stiffly. 

Killua sighed, looking back at his reflection in the mirror, “Nevermind. Why are you still in the bathroom, anyway?”

“Is it so bad I wanna watch you get ready? Plus, I don’t have anything better to do while I wait for my hair to dry.” Gon shrugged. 

“Whatever.” Killua mumbled, pulling a small toiletry bag from his backpack and placing it on the counter. 

Gon watched him carefully as he unzipped the bag, pulling out a black hair tie and a pink hair clip. He used the hair tie to put his bangs in a tiny ponytail, then used the clip to pin it back out of his face. He pressed his back up against the mirror, continuing his shameless staring at Killua—while Killua tried his best to ignore it.

He pulled a small tube of liquid eyeliner, then opened it and began carefully applying it; just a small wing in the outer corner of both his eyelids.

“Killua, you wear eyeliner?” Gon asked, raising an eyebrow.

Killua perked up, giving Gon a side glance out of the corner of his eyes, chuckling softly when he joked: “Yeah? You think I just naturally have winged eyelids?” 

“…Yeah?” Gon giggled nervously.

Killua just rolled his eyes with a smirk, and continued applying eyeliner on his other eye. Once he was done, he grabbed a q-tip and attempted to clean up the end point.

Gon leaned in close, closely inspecting Killua’s face, “Can you do that on me later?”

Killua inched away, then snorted, “If Retz doesn’t think you’re gay already, she definitely will when she sees you wearing makeup.”

“It’s not gay for a guy to wear makeup!” Gon cried, before placing his hand on his heart with sarcastic disappointment, “And here I thought you of all people would be above saying things like that.”

“Okay, okay. If you sit still and behave yourself, I’ll really think about it.” Killua chuckled, resuming his routine as he unclipped his hair, then pulled out a comb and hairspray.

Gon smiled as he resumed eyeing Killua down. He observed with curious eyes as Killua messed around with his own hair—but he wasn’t so curious about what he was doing—more so how he looked while doing it. 

And it wasn’t weird—of course it wasn’t weird. Just one dude checking out another, all in typical bro fashion. Whoever makes it weird obviously cannot handle a normal, affectionate, and totally platonic friendship between two men. 

He continued admiring the sight in front of him, carefully studying his best friend’s abs as they flexed when he leaned in closer to the mirror. The hard muscles on his bicep becoming more defined as he reached his arm up into his hair, spraying a little too much hair spray. 

The only thing that pulled Gon away from his staring was the sudden urgent need to cough. 

“Jeez, Killua, how much of that do you need?” Gon managed to get out in between coughs. 

“As much as I please.” He replied sarcastically. 

Gon just laughed in response, but quickly whipped out his phone to distract himself with something, presumably Retz, Killua assumed.

He looked down. Then—he saw it. A big tent was forming in Gon’s boxers; with very little attempt to hide it.

…Was it because of him? Did Gon pop a boner just staring at Killua getting ready? Surely not. More importantly, why wasn’t he making even a sorry attempt to cover it up? There wasn’t a chance that he didn’t feel it. 

“Killua?”

He coughed, “Uh, yeah?”

Gon put his phone down on the counter, “Are you done?”

“Huh—yeah—yes I’m done, but I still need to y’know, change.”

“Can you do my dog makeup for me now?” Gon asked sweetly, not even a hint of suspicion or shame in his voice.

“Um, your uh, hair—it’s still wet.” Killua choked out.

Gon reached a hand into his hair, eyeing Killua with confusion, “No it’s not, it’s a little damp, but it’s not dripping at all.” 

“Uh—”

“No excuses! Please?” Gon pleaded, giving Killua his best puppy eyes, “Mito is for sure going to want a million pictures of us, so we need to be done with at least twenty minutes to spare. We don’t want to be super late, y’know.”

Killua sighed and began digging in his bag once again, “I seriously hate you sometimes.” 

“Mhm.” Gon nodded cheerfully, scooting closer to the edge of the counter, and closer to Killua.

Killua took his eyeliner pen back out, uncapping it and moving closer to Gon, hesitantly, and trying his best not to feel Gon’s erection poking into his side, “Um—just, close your eyes, okay?” 

Gon closed his eyes with a smile, “Okay, don’t make the wings too big, I wanna look like a puppy.” 

“Don’t move.” Killua ordered as he grabbed the other boy's chin, and Gon’s heart might have skipped a beat when he felt the cold liquid tip pressing against his eye combined with the feeling of Killua’s warm fingertips.

When Killua moved onto the other eye, Gon slightly flinched at the sudden cold press to his other side. 

Killua laughed teasingly, “I can tell you’re not used to this.” 

Gon shushed him, then, “You’re making me nervous, stop it.” 

Killua paused for a minute, taking the pen off of Gon’s eyelid in order not to mess up. Just as he swore he didn’t have any more blood left in his body to rush to his face—he was proven painfully wrong.

“Uh, um, yeah, sorry.” He stammered, letting white locks fall over his eyes. 

“I think we’re making each other nervous.” Gon peaked one eye open, smiling, “I mean, obviously you aren’t used to having pretty boys like me sitting on your counter—but don’t get me wrong! I’m not used to having a hot guy touching all up on my face either.” 

“Gon, if you don’t shut up right now, I’m not doing your makeup.” Killua threatened, attempting to keep his cool, all the while his heart was a few beats away from bursting out of his chest. 

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, I was joking!” Gon giggled.

Killua rolled his eyes and went back to working on Gon’s face, “I’m lucky to already have natural white hair—or you probably would have already given me a full head of greys.” 

Gon smiled in response, but didn’t say anything further in order not to mess up a now very focused Killua—who could finally focus on Gon’s makeup after his friend’s boner had thankfully faded away. 

He finished Gon’s other eye, adding an extension on both of Gon’s inner corners. Then Killua moved down to the tip of his nose, coloring in a small black puppy nose. He finished it off with a couple asymmetrical black spots along the right side of Gon’s face, from the end of his eyebrow to just above his jawline. 

“Okay, uh, I’m done.” Killua announced, putting the pen back in his bag, then shifting to watch Gon as he admired himself in the mirror.

“Wow, it’s perfect!” 

A smug smile covered Killua’s face, “Obviously, I did it.” 

“Uh-huh, I’ll let you change now, tell me if you need any help with anything.” Gon said as he jumped off the counter, stopping right at the door frame before saying: “I’m sorry, by the way.” 

Killua perked up, pure confusion written all over his face, “Sorry for what?”

He smiled awkwardly, looking down at his boxers, then mumbling “I think you know what”, before quickly shutting the bathroom door behind him—leaving Killua by himself, staring at the closed door with wide eyes. 

So he was aware.

Killua wondered how somebody could possibly be so shameless.

A few minutes later, Killua walked out fully changed. Gon was changed into his costume by now as well, and laid on his stomach on the bed, looking up innocently at Killua—as if he hadn't just admitted to sprouting a boner at the sight of his best friend. If that’s even what he meant, but Killua kind of hoped he did.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Gon asked, and Killua knew what he meant.

“No.” He shot back quickly.

Gon sprung up from the bed, chuckling, “Yeah, I figured as much. Let’s head downstairs, maybe we can sneak past aunt Mito and get out of a twenty minute photo shoot.”

“Yep.” Killua nodded, following Gon out the door and quietly down the stairs. 

Just as Killua had grabbed his keys and walked out the front door alongside Gon—they heard a voice call from the kitchen. 

“Oh, goody! You two are ready! Give me a few minutes to finish up in the kitchen and I’ll come take your pictures!” 

They both groaned, simultaneously and exasperatingly, but softly enough not to be heard by  Mito. 

“We’ll wait!” Gon called back, a palm pressed over his forehead, Killua chuckled. 

Then they returned to an awkward silence—what should be happening after, well, their bathroom situation. 

Finally, Mito came running around the corner with her phone in hand, “Alright, come on boys!”

“How do you want us?” Killua asked. 

“Oh, just pose however you see fit, I’m sure you two will look just absolutely adorable either way.” She beamed. 

They both stood up, standing in front of the door with their arms around each other’s shoulders—and one awkward smile from Killua. 

“Killua, smile normally.” Mito barked, peaking up from her phone. 

Killua tried his best to smile, which he assumed worked, considering the absence of Mito’s complaints. 

“Okay, now hug eachother.” She ordered, and when they complied—“wait, not like that, here!” 

Finally, after almost thirty minutes of several humiliatingly intimate positions Mito had forced them into, they were finally off to Meruem’s party in Killua’s car.

Surprisingly, the atmosphere was as normal as it could be. Gon had chatted the whole ride about only-God-knows-what, considering Killua was too focused on the road—only responding once or twice to some stupid question Gon asked. 

Just like that, it was like they were normal again. No weird feelings, no unsolicited erections, just typical friendship. Killua let out a sigh of relief as he parked alongside the road, since all of the driveway spots had now been taken up. 

Maybe he had been wrong to dread this party for so long, who doesn’t like a little bit of good fun?

Chapter Text

Killua’s white SUV rocked back and forth as the two slammed the car doors shut and met at the other side. The sun had long set by now, and the only thing illuminating each other's faces—and the path to the house, was Meruem’s flashy porch lights.

Muffled music was booming from inside, so much so that Killua could practically feel the bass in his chest; in contrast to his already booming heart.

“I wonder if Kurapika and Leorio are here yet.” Gon broke the silence as he followed Killua up the wide concrete steps.

Killua shrugged, ringing the doorbell, “Probably, you know how Kurapika is when it comes to punctuality.”

Before Gon could reply, they heard the sound of the lock clicking, then the front door opening halfway—the music invading their eardrums growing ten times louder. Meruem popped his head out, before smiling and pushing the door fully open.

From outside, you could clearly see the kitchen and living room, parallel from each other. The kitchen was filled with two large fold out tables, covered with a white plastic cover—which had splatters of red paint imitating blood. On these tables, laid various Halloween themed snacks, which Killua was most excited for. Meruem’s parties always had the best food. It’s something he could always look forward to.

“Gon, Killua! Glad you could make it dudes. Come on in, and don’t worry about the shoes.” He spoke, with just a hint of nonchalance.

“Happy to be here.” Killua saluted, and Gon nodded in agreement before they both stepped inside.

Meruem didn’t converse further. He just shut the door and went back to the kitchen—where his girlfriend, Komugi, greeted him with a smile and a drink in each hand.

“Ugh, the first few minutes at parties are always so awkward, right Gon?” Killua groaned, furrowing his eyebrows when he didn’t get a response, “Gon?”

Killua looked around in confusion—and not to his surprise, Gon was already running off talking to a group of people in the living room. Of course, just the usual occurrences with his painfully extroverted best friend. Just the complete and utter opposite of him. He just rolled his eyes and walked into the kitchen for a soft drink. Where he unfortunately ran into Retz.

Unfortunately? Was it unfortunate? Was it a good thing? Honestly, he didn’t even know anymore.

Retz stood still with a phone in one hand, and a red solo cup with a green plastic straw in the other. She was dressed as the queen of hearts—dressed in a diy top made of playing cards glued together; which made her boobs look two cups bigger, and a red sequin mini skirt. The outfit was topped off with a pair of black platform gogo boots that boosted her five foot frame up to around five foot four.

She wore a white crown decorated with red hearts on top of her hair, which was curled into perfect blonde beach waves. Retz’ makeup was flawless, as well. She wore subtle blue eyeshadow, wispy fake lashes, red lipstick that shaped her lips into a plump heart—and the look was completed with several pearls shaped into hearts glued to her cheeks.

She looked up from her phone, smiled—pulling him in an awkward side hug, “Hi, Killua! Have you seen, um, Gon? I assume you guys got here together.”

“Pretty sure he’s in the living room, he just kind of ran off.” Killua shrugged, a half-smile on his face, so obviously forced it was painful to watch.

“Ah, that’s alright. I’ll find him later.” Retz smiled, “Want me to make you a drink?”

“It’s fine, I was just planning on getting a Dr. Pepper or something.” Killua mumbled, scratching the back of his head.

“Oh, come on! It’s a party!” She whined, before narrowing her eyes and leaning in closer, “Or are you scared of getting drunk?”

Killua scoffed and rolled his eyes, “I don’t get drunk.”

“Oh come on, just for fun!” She lightened up, her voice still just barely audible over the booming bass of house music blaring from the speakers.

“Uh.” Killua looked around for a moment, before saying, “Ugh, sure, fine—whatever.”

“Perfect! Any special request?” Retz beamed, spinning around and grabbing two red solo cups.

“Just give me like, uhh, a rum with coke, I guess.” He monotoned, eerily close to the way his creepy eldest brother does.

“Wow, boring! But respectable, I suppose.” She joked, handing Killua the cup.

Killua took a sip, taking a second to adjust to the bitter flavor, “So, you gonna go find Gon?”

“In a minute, he’ll probably come over here soon anyway.” Retz paused, taking a sip from her straw, “Cute costumes, by the way.”

“Um, thanks, you too.” Killua choked, his face reddening slightly.

“Mhm, you guys truly look like a real couple dressed like that.” She added, her tone remaining as sweet as ever.

“Are we doing this again?” Killua grumbled, despite his insides going crazy.

“Just an observation.” Retz shrugged.

“Right.” He spoke, popping the ‘t’, “I’ll go find, um, y’know, Gon now, if you wanna join.”

“I’m fine with my friends, I’ll catch up later.” Retz assured.

Killua just shrugged and walked away. When he walked back into the living room, Gon was chatting away with Leorio and Kurapika —who were both dressed as pirates, hats, bandanas and all.

He smiled, sliding an arm over Gon’s shoulder as he approached the group. Gon’s body jolted as a reaction to the sudden touch—but he quickly turned his head and erupted into a sweet laugh.

He tilted his head up a little higher to face his best friend better, “Hi, you scared me.”

“And you left me.” Killua quipped, with a goofy smile and a playful slap to his shoulder.

“Jesus, you two.” Kurapika sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and glancing up at an already chuckling Leorio, “It’s like we aren’t even here.”

“What do you mean?” Gon asked.

“Um—anyway, Retz was looking for you, Gon.” Killua stammered before Kurapika could blab any further.

“Oh, was she? I was so caught up with everyone else I didn't even think to check where she was.” Gon shrugged, not seeming all too worried.

Just as Killua was about to suggest finding her—Canary, dressed as Wonder Woman, suddenly ran up to them; wrapping the two in her arms as best as she could reach.

“Oh my gosh!” She squealed, whipping out her light pink fancy digital camera “You guys all look adorable! Can I get a picture of you together?”

Gon nodded his head in excitement, “Sure! The four of us?”

“Yup.” Canary confirmed.

“Sounds good to me.” Leorio shrugged, positioning himself on the far left of the group.

Canary began tweaking the camera settings as they all got into position. Leorio slid his hand onto Kurapika’s waist, who was in the middle of the group, right next to Gon. Killua stood awkwardly on the far right of the group, parallel to Leorio, with his drink still in hand.

“Killua, you look like there’s a stick shoved up your ass. Loosen up!” She whined.

“Ugh, are all of you women like this?” He groaned, returning his free arm to Gon’s shoulder and bringing himself closer.

She looked up from her camera, raised an eyebrow, then looked back down, “I’ll pretend like you didn’t just say that.”

Retz came around the corner in search of Gon, but stopped when she saw the scene. More specifically—Gon and Killua. They all smiled, Gon’s teeth practically sparkling, while the rest just kept a closed smile. Canary pressed some button on her camera, and with a shutter and the flash stunning their eyes, she gave a thumbs up.

Retz leaned against the wall a few feet away as Canary ordered them around once again, “Okay, now give me just Gon and Killua!”

“Sure, we’re gonna go raid Meruem’s wine cellar.” Leorio said, grabbing Kurapika by the wrist and pulling him out of the room.

“I thought you said picture, not pictures.” Killua scoffed.

Gon gave a playful shove to the taller boy's chest, “Be grateful! Pictures always make the night last longer.”

Killua stayed silent, despite the protest clear on his face.

“Sheesh, Gon, you seriously have him on a leash, don’t ‘ya?” Canary cooed, pouting her bottom lip.

“Oh my god, this is insufferable.” Killua whined again, slapping a hand over his eyes—his embarrassment clear as day on his pink cheeks.

Gon giggled, but stopped when he noticed Retz, raising an arm to wave her over. “Retz! Come take a picture with me and Killua!”

She smiled, making her way over to hear better, and doing her very best to avoid any eye contact with Killua—which wasn’t too hard, considering his height. “Sorry, what’d you say?”

“I asked you to come take a picture with us.” Gon repeated, smiling.

“Oh, no, it’s fine.” She politely declined, “I’ll go after, you guys should have your own picture.”

“Guys! I don’t have all day, y’know. There’s like.. forty other people I need to photograph so I don’t get an earful from Meruem.” Canary whined, tapping her foot on the ground.

“Oh, yeah, sorry!” Gon laughed, getting a lot closer to Killua—so much so that Killua was sure Gon could feel his pounding heart.

He attempted to stay calm as Gon wrapped one arm around his neck, and placed the other right on to the middle of his chest.

Yeah, he could definitely tell that Killua was freaking out now. No doubt about it.

Gon stuck his tongue out and smiled. Killua attempted his best smile, which probably wasn’t all too good; considering the fact he was one more touch away from letting his mind wander in places it shouldn’t. The camera flashed, and they were done. Thankfully.

“Retz? You wanna go with Gon now?” Canary asked, looking over her shoulder.

“Yeah, come on!” Gon encouraged, his arms leaving Killua and extending out in front of him, inviting her over.

“I guess I will.” Retz giggled at the sheer excitement of her boyfriend.

As Killua backed away towards Canary, Retz now stood by Gon’s side. Her boots making it so there was just a small difference in their height now, compared to usual—and especially compared to Gon and Killua’s.

“Are you sure it doesn’t look weird? The drastic difference in our costumes, I mean.” She asked Canary, receiving a concerned look from Gon.

“Nah, you guys look great.” Canary reassured.

She shrugged, then leaned in closer to Gon as he placed an unsure arm atop her shoulder—just barely even touching her. Retz furrowed her eyebrows for a second, confused at the sudden awkwardness. Was it awkwardness? Still, she brushed it off, placing an open hand under her chin, and pretended to blow a kiss at Gon, all while looking into the camera.

“Smile!” Canary shouted, snapping the picture.

And as soon as she did, Gon practically leaped away, swarming Canary’s personal bubble. “Let me see the one with Killua and I!”

“Okay, okay.” She giggled, clicking a few buttons on her camera and handing it over to the squealing Gon.

“Look, Killua!” He beamed, passing it over to Killua, “We look so cute!”

“Yeah, I guess.” Killua mumbled, looking over at Retz, who had a blatant hurt look in her eyes.

“Oh right! Retz, come see ours!” Gon called, practically shoving the camera in her face.

She gently pushed the camera a little further away, smiling, “We look nice.”

“I’ll send you guys the pictures later, I have more work to do!” Canary said proudly, making her way to Baise, Melody, and Squala—who were all standing in a group.

Then a voice—Knuckles voice—called from the kitchen, “Gon! Get in here!”

“What’s he want?” Killua rolled his eyes.

Gon shrugged, “I dunno, let’s go find out.”

He motioned for Retz to come along, then grabbed a reluctant Killua by his wrist and dragged him into the kitchen; where Knuckle and Shoot stood with menacing looks plastered on their faces.

Actually, it was just Knuckle with a menacing look on his face. Shoot’s face read a little more like—‘I’m done with Knuckles bullshit.’

“What’s up?” Gon asked, letting go of Killua.

“Beat me in beer pong, I bet ‘cha can’t.” Knuckle dared, probably already drunk.

Actually—scratch that, he was definitely already drunk.

Killua scowled and crossed his arms, looking down at Gon’s fired up expression. Gon had never even played beer pong before, he’d be surprised if he even knew the rules. Still, knowing Gon, he would accept the challenge without so much as a moment's hesitation.

“You’re on. What’s the stakes?”

Of course.

Then again, Gon was pretty good at most everything he tried—but it usually only served to aid his stubbornness.

“The loser has to accept any dare, any dare at all.” Knuckle narrowed his eyes, slamming both hands on the table in front of him—the furry sleeves of his cheap werewolf costume almost knocking over the red solo cups full of beer as he did.

“Easy!” Gon declared confidently, before lowering his voice into a soft chuckle, “So, how do you play beer pong anyway?”

“Gon! You’re betting on a game of beer pong, when you don’t even know how to play?” Retz shouted, half in laughter, half in utter disbelief. Knuckle and Shoot were already huddled up today, snickering and saying something about how ‘they’ve already got it in the bag.’

“Are you even surprised?” Killua sighed, taking the last sip of his drink and tossing it in the nearest bin.

“Guys! Come on!” He whined, before stepping closer to Killua, looking up, placing both hands on his chest, and—“Killuaaa, teach me how to play, please?”

His body has now suddenly felt like he just finished running a marathon—his face turning bright pink, along with the tips of his ears. He was sure everyone could hear his exasperated breathing, was he breathing heavy? He couldn’t even tell anymore. Killua felt beads of sweat form on his forehead and under his armpits, and the fact he couldn’t even attempt at hiding his face from the shorter boy wasn’t helping in the slightest.

Was Gon purposefully being a tease? With his girlfriend watching? No way. No way this could possibly be intentional. Killua was just making a typical guy thing weird, because he always did. By now, he’d been silent for about five seconds. Was his lack of response exposing him right now? Or would it be the jumbled up mess of a sentence he would attempt to form instead?

“I—um,” Killua stammered, grabbing a handful of his own hair; now a little hot with sweat.

“I can teach you, Gon.” Retz smiled, grabbing him by the shoulder and spinning him around to face her.

Gon lit up, “Mmm, okay! But will I still get to play with Killua? Me and him are always the best at partner games—since we’re so in sync!”

“‘Course, how about we do a practice round?” She suggested, both arms up in front of her.

“Come on, I’m falling asleep over here!” Knuckle grumbled, drunkenly throwing an arm over Shoot’s arm.

Shoot rolled his eyes, “It’s fine if you guys don’t wanna play now, we can just find someone else ‘till you're ready.”

“Hey, just give us a minute!” Retz shot back.

Killua cleared his throat, a shy look still occupying his face, “It’s fine, just play with me Gon, I’ll show you how.” Then, his eyes grew serious as he turned his head to face knuckle, “If there’s anything in these drinks, I’ll seriously kill you.”

“I’d never! Gon is my favorite teammate, after all!” Knuckle cried, throwing both hands up defensively.

“Okay! Let’s do this!” Gon interrupted before Killua could say more.

Killua carefully sorted six cups on their side into a neat triangle like shape, while Shoot did the same on the other end of the table. Retz stood leaned against the kitchen counter next to them, pulling out her phone to get her ‘finsta’ footage, as she called it. Once both teams were done sorting their cups evenly, Killua pulled Gon closer to him—instructing to watch carefully when his turn came.

Knuckle went first, bending his knees so that his chin was leveled with the table. A strange tactic, In Killua’s opinion. Knuckle closed one eye, then, as if his intoxication had gone away at that very moment—carefully threw the ball and landed it into the cup in the very front of the triangle.

“Wow, I did not expect that to work.” Killua whistled.

“Is that how I should do it?” Gon asked, looking up at Killua.

“Uh, no, watch how the professionals do it.” Killua boasted, placing a prideful hand on top of Gon’s head, “but, we do have to drink whatever cup they manage to land their ball in, get it?”

“Oh, sure.” He shrugged, reaching for the cup—downing the contents in one big chug.

When he put it down, he glanced over at Killua; who had a dumbfounded look on his face. Gon raised an eyebrow, throwing the cup into the trash, “What?”

“Gon! You’re priceless!” Knuckle laughed, Shoot joined him shortly after with a quick snort.

“Well, I was gonna say we could share it.. but that’s fine too?” Killua chuckled.

“Oh.. oops!” He chuckled nervously, his cheeks lightly tinged with pink.

“Hey, hold on, don’t we get another turn? Knuckle did make it, after all.” Shoot interjected, just before Killua could reach for the small ping pong ball.

“Let it slide, it’s Gon’s first time, isn’t it? Go easy on us.” Killua countered—earning an angry look from his smaller best friend.

“Hey! I can handle it, don’t underestimate me.” He pouted, crossing both arms, right after giving Killua a light shove.

“Nah, it’s all good. We’ll win away. Won’t we, shoot?” Knuckle intervened, with pure and utter confidence in his voice.

“Whatever.” Shoot shrugged, carelessly.

Killua then nodded, with a smug grin flashed across his face. He leaned down, one hand flat down on the table, the other holding the ping point ball. Soon, his smug expression turned into pure focus—his eyebrows furrowing, lips slightly pursed, eyes just barely squinting.

Gon watched him with precision. He tried his best to focus on Killua’s technique, how he threw the ball, how he stood—but it was useless.

Instead of focusing on Killua’s strategy, he was more so focused on Killua’s beauty; one would even call it sexual radiance.

Instead of focusing on Killua’s strategy, he focused on the way white tufts of hair shifted toward his face as he leaned further down. He focused on how good his muscles looked in his very revealing costume, the subtle flex from Killua’s body weight pressing into his arms giving it a sort of popping look. Gon’s eyes drifted lower, admiring Killua’s ass in his sexy fire fighter pants—the outline was close to, if not perfect.

And oh, his face. That concentrated look. It was making Gon all hot and bothered.

Then—snapping out of it, he glanced over at Retz, who was giving him the biggest and sweetest smile known to man. She was so pretty, he liked her a lot.

So why was he acting this way around Killua, his best friend? They were just best friends, there weren't any other feelings behind it, right? Gon had a girlfriend, after all; it’s impossible for him to have feelings for Killua. It was just plain and simple admiration. It’s easy to mistake feelings of genuine friendship for love, isn’t it? A girlfriend is basically just a best friend with a couple added benefits, Retz was Gon’s girlfriend—Killua wasn’t his boyfriend.

Killua had shot, making the ball inside of the cup that was furthest to the right, then turned to Gon—who was clearly spaced out.

“Gon, you okay? Did you pay attention at all?” Killua chuckled.

God, his laugh was so sexy. He was like a real life Prince Charming from all those princess movies Aunt Mito had forced Gon into watching.

“What?” Gon asked.

“I said, did you pay attention?” He repeated.

Gon stared at him for a moment, stunned, “Oh, was I paying attention? Um, no, not really, sorry Killua.”

Retz laughed, “Pfft, I got you on camera, you look so clueless!”

“Retz! Delete it!” Gon cried.

Knuckle slammed the cup on the table(as hard as he could slam a plastic cup, anyway), and let out an ‘ahh’ after finishing the last of the beer inside.

“Lucky shot, we’re still gonna win.” He announced confidently, throwing out his cup.

Fifteen minutes later—between tiring earfuls from Knuckle and mountains of trash talk from Killua—the game had come to the shot that would decide the final score of the match. Gon and Killua’s team had just a single cup left on the other side, while Knuckle and shoot still had three.

Meaning, regardless of their redemption turn; if Gon makes this, he and Killua will have stolen the match. No doubt about it.

..And of course, Gon being Gon, just had to take the last turn. Despite Killua’s countless protests, of course. Gon always got his way, especially with his white haired best friend—who seemed to have absolutely no back bone when it came to him.

It was an entertaining sight to watch for everyone around them, the cold blooded boy who seemed to hate everyone and everything—acting like a loyal puppy for his smaller best friend. Entertaining for all but Retz, anyway. She watched them play, kind of, mostly just trying her best to appear uninterested as she scrolled through her phone and sipped her drink.

At this point, the party had shifted from people dancing to upbeat music—to everyone worn out, and lounging on the couch as a slow song completely changed the atmosphere.

Which Killua had unmistakably identified as ‘Everybody Here Wants You’ by Jeff Buckley.

As if the mood wasn’t already sexy enough, with Gon prancing around in front of him in his tiny little shorts and his pretty little face, this had just been the icing on the cake.

“Gon, are you sure you don’t want me to do it? You’ll be in a pissy mood if we lose, and I don’t feel like dealing with you right now.” Killua tried his best to protest, one hand half-way up and the other placed on his hip.

“No, I wanna win, and I will! Put some faith into me, Killu-aaa!” He grumbled, picking up the ball and getting into a wide stance in front of the table.

Killua sighed as he inched closer, “Okay, at least, let me help you.”

Gon thought about yelling at Killua again, but before he could even open his mouth to speak—Killua’s hands were placed on each side of his waist, inching him a little further down and closer to the table.

“Here, stand like this.” Killua instructed, “Then aim, and throw it, but don’t be too eager. Really focus.”

“Are you two about to fuck right in front of us, or are you gonna throw the damn thing?!” Knuckle grumbled impatiently. Shoot just pinched the bridge of his nose in embarrassment.

“Oh my god, shut up!” Killua hissed, practically jumping back like a startled street cat.

“Guys! Stop! I’m trying to focus.” Gon scolded—seemingly unaffected by what had just been said.

Gon had completely shifted from the position Killua had guided him into, his legs now further away from the table as he bent over slightly to try and get the best out of his shot. The bottom of his buttcheeks slightly peaked out where his shorts ended. Killua found it hard to focus on anything other than the fact that Gon was in the position Killua’s been wanting to put him in for the last few days.

Going unnoticed by Killua—Gon had tossed the ball up into the air, and made the shot. He was only brought out of his trance once Gon began obnoxiously cheering, clapping his hands and jumping up and down.

“Good job, guys!” Retz clapped with a giggle.

“Don’t get too cocky! We still have our redemption turn.” Shoot reminded as Knuckle (who was now drunk past oblivion) finished the last of the beer inside of the cup, “We’re still winning this thing!”

Gon shrugged, his face as egotistical as ever, “I wouldn’t count on it, but be my guest.”

“Didn’t take you as such a trash talker, Gon.” Killua giggled, throwing a friendly punch to his shoulder.

Gon looked up at him with a knowing smile, his voice changing to a whisper, “Yeah, I like to talk dirty.”

“What—excuse me?” Killua fumbled his words, half-confused and half-embarrassed.

Gon’s eyes shifted back down at their competition, “Hm? Forget it, I was just joking.”

Killua tried his best to keep his gaze straight ahead, “Uh, right.”

Shoot had one eye closed to maximize his focus, as Knuckle rambled on next to him about how they had to win because well of course he was.

So he shot,

…and he missed.

“Beautiful shot!” Killua said sarcastically. Gon giggled at his quip, while Retz cheered in the background—along with Meleoreon and Ikalgo, who had caught wind of their friends little competition and of course came to cheer on their two best buds.

“We won?”’ Knuckle asked, sobriety currently an unknown concept to him.

Shoot raised an eyebrow with laughter, “Yeah, no—”

“Perfect, so I can dare them anything?” Knuckle interrupted.

“No—”

“Okay. Gon and Killua, you guys have to kiss—and make out and stuff. Maybe like give each other a blow job or something.” Knuckle continued.

“Dude, we won.” Killua reminded him, crossing his arms as he tried to ignore Knuckle's words.

“Why do you want us to kiss so badly, anyway? And uh, that other thing.” Gon added, shifting his weight from leg to leg uncomfortably.

As if on cue, ‘Kiss Me’ by Sixpence None The Richer creeped its way through the speakers. Killua gulped.

Knuckle looked at them with confusion, “So, why aren’t you guys kissing?”

“Jesus, let’s go.” Shoot mumbled in embarrassment, pushing his friend away towards the nearest chair to sit him in—despite Knuckles’s complete lack of enthusiasm about it.

“Tell us when Knuckle’s sober enough to do our dare!” Gon shouted, which Shoot responded to with a thumbs up.

Then, silence. They made awkward eye contact for a second or two there.

“So, uh, that was weird.” Killua spoke up, his voice piercing the uncomfortable silence—that somehow seemed as loud and full of sexuality as any boy band concert.

Gon smiled, opening his mouth to speak—but before he could, Retz came running up to him. She pulled him in a tight hug, squealing like a fan girl meeting her idol.

“Wow, I can’t believe you actually won!” Retz praised, pulling away from him and placing a hand on her hip, “You really are good, at like, everything.”

“Haha, I guess.” He mumbled, one hand twiddling with the hem of his shirt.

She turned to Killua, raising her hand for a high-five, “Good job to you too!”

“Thanks.” Killua monotoned, returning her high-five.

“Anyway, Gon. I’m gonna go talk with Palm for a while, meet me back here in like, thirty, yeah?” Retz blew a kiss as she walked away—without waiting for a response from Gon.

Gon blinked, unresponsive.

Killua looked down at him, “Uh, Gon?”

“Killua, let’s go dancing!” He suddenly beamed, snapping out of his trance-like state.

“Seriously? You know I can’t,” Killua rolled his eyes as he leaned against the wall behind him, “How many times are we gonna go over this?”

A smug smile appeared on Gon’s face, before he leaned in as close as he could with narrow eyes, “And how many times are you gonna try arguing with me when you know I always get my way with you, one way or another?”

Killua’s cheeks lit up a little, not enough to notice. He furrowed his brows and let out a long, dreadful sigh.

“So? They’re playing all the good music now, everyone’s dancing on the porch, they even have a disco ball out there!”

“I’ll dance, go on without me. I’ll meet you outside.” Killua grumbled, waving him off.

Gon smiled from ear to ear, nodding and running off toward the backdoor.

Killua cursed himself for the amount of makeup he had put on—because he really wanted to splash his face with some water right now. At least that would help him cool down.

He sighed, deciding on the next best thing. Killua walked back to the living room, where he found Kurapika and Leorio cozying up on the couch. Kurapika was leaning on the couch arm, legs up on top of Leorio’s, while Leorio caressed his thigh and took tiny sips out of his wine glass.

Killua walked up to them, “Kurapika?”

“Hm, what’s up?” He asked, looking up.

Killua’s eyes darted around nervously for a moment, before he could speak up again, “I’m having, um, problems. Can we talk? Alone?”

Leorio shrugged, and stood up, “You guys do that, I’ll go grab a refill in the kitchen or something.”

Once he walked away, Killua sat down on the couch in his place. Kurapika shifted his position to where he was right next to Killua.

He placed an arm around Killua’s shoulder reassuringly, “So, what’s going on?” Then, lowering his volume to a whisper, “Is it Gon?”

Killua hesitated a little before replying, “Yeah, it’s uh, Gon.”

“What’s with him?”

“He just, ugh. It’s like he’s purposefully dangling himself on a stick right in front of me, he’s acting like his girlfriend isn’t watching our every single move. Literally.” Killua grumbled, his head falling into his palms, elbows resting upon his knees.

Kurapika chuckled a little, “Sorry, yeah, I did see that. While you guys were playing beer pong with Knuckle and Shoot, just try to keep yourself together, okay?”

Killua threw his head back onto the headrest, “It’s hard. He wants me to go dance with him now, as if there wasn’t enough sexual tension charged into the air already.”

“Not to dismiss your problems or anything, but go dance with him. You should have fun, and quite frankly—me and Leorio were having a pretty good conversation, and I don’t really give out good advice when I’m tipsy. Talk to me tomorrow?” Kurapika offered, followed up with a quick laugh.

Killua blinked, stunned, “Yeah, sorry, I didn’t mean to be a bother, or whatever.” He then mumbled, standing up, “I’ll go try and dance with Gon.”

“Attaboy, have fun.” Kurapika encouraged with a not-so-sober smile, shooting him a thumbs up.

Killua smiled back at him, weakly, but he tried.

Once he opened up the back door, he was immediately slapped in the face with the music that was much louder(and frankly, much better)than what was playing inside of the house.

Apparently, all the party animals were outside. Explains the sudden laid back atmosphere inside of the house.

Killua looked around, and spotted the one thing he actually expected to see, Gon dancing with someone random who he’d probably coerced into coming onto the dance floor. This time, it was Ponzu.

They were dancing to ‘Rhythm Is a Dancer’ by SNAP!, and the speed at which they were dancing absolutely baffled Killua. How did people come up with all of these moves on the spot?

He watched them for a moment, Ponzu laughed as Gon guided her into spinning around under his finger—then spinning his own body around.

The pale moonlight lit up Gon’s face beautifully, accentuating every freckle, every dimple, his fluttering eyelashes, and even every bead of sweat on his forehead. Still, he looked ethereal.

The way he and Ponzu moved their hips in sync—Gon significantly better, being the dancer he is. Although it was impressive how he could match anyone’s tempo.

Then, Gon looked up to catch Killua staring—and Killua quickly looked away with widened eyes. Gon said something inaudible to Ponzu, waved her goodbye, and pranced over to where Killua stood; practically clutching his heart at the sight of his raven haired best friend.

“Hi, why haven’t you come dance with me yet?” Gon asked, frowning.

Killua cleared his throat, looking back up, “I saw you were dancing with Ponzu already, I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“Excuses! Come on, let’s go.” Gon pouted, grabbing Killua by the wrist and bringing him out to the middle of the lit up dance floor.

As the previous song ended and the intro to some other lesser known pop song began to play, Meruem rushed up quickly to his computer and with a few clicks—Killua’s worst nightmare had come true. A slow song.

The unmistakable intro of ‘Every Breath You Take’ by The Police had sent shivers down Killua’s spine as Gon grabbed both his hands, intertwining their fingers.

“Um—can we even dance to this?” Killua choked.

“Sure we can, this is one of my favorites.” Gon smiled, almost knowingly.

He swallowed hard as Gon pulled Killua’s hand on top of his waist, placing his own around Killua’s neck. They raised their free hands together, and began swaying to the beat.

Better said, Gon began swaying to the beat, and Killua lagged behind in embarrassment.

As the intro beat continued, and the lyrics began to flood his ears, Gon leaned in closer, whispering “I told you we could dance to this.”

Killua felt a shiver rush down his spine as he felt his entire head grow hot, “Gon, you’re killing me.” he groaned.

Gon replied by raising an eyebrow in confusion and tilting his head, causing Killua to let out an exasperated sigh.

“Nothing, nevermind.”

Then, Gon practically smushed their groins together once the chorus began to play. Killua threw his head down, strands of white hair falling over his face.

He bit his lip as he felt heat travel from his face, all the way down to his crotch. There were many things running through his mind—but ‘what the hell?’ and, ‘what the fuck?’ were definitely the most prevalent.

Gon didn’t seem nearly as affected though, as if this was just two things friends do together. He had both eyes closed, and a smile as he moved slowly to the rhythm. Killua tried his best not to seem all over the place, not receiving heavy eye contact from Gon might have been the only thing saving him at the moment.

A little more than halfway into the song, Killua had managed to calm his emotions—and most importantly, his arousal. With this, Gon had opened his eyes and frowned a little.

“Sorry. Is this making you uncomfortable?” He asked as they continued dancing, genuine concern in his voice, “I didn’t mean to.”

“No, um, it’s not making me uncomfortable.” Killua responded hoarsely.

Was it weird that he said that? Or would it have been even weirder if he said it was making him uncomfortable?

“Oh, good.”

“Yeah.”

Gon’s eyes darted around for a beat, something that had been an unusual sight to Killua—he rarely had seen Gon get nervous, and this was probably the first time Killua had been the reason for it.

“I should go meet up with Retz now, so I’ll talk to you in a few, okay?” Gon spoke, unlocking his fingers with Killua and letting his hands fall to his sides.

Killua put his sweaty palm behind his head, waving Gon off with the other one, “Yeah, see you.”

As soon as Gon faded away through the sliding door, ‘Get Low’ by Lil John played—and Killua said a silent prayer, he could only imagine what kind of moves he’d be forced into dancing with Gon to this song.

——-

Retz instructed Gon to meet her in the upstairs hallway, and as he made his way up the steps—he was almost immediately grabbed by the wrist and swept away into the nearest bedroom. Once he was inside, she closed the door behind a very startled Gon.

“You scared me.” Gon chuckled, his breath ragged.

“You took your time, for sure.” She turned around to face him, crossing both arms across her chest.

Gon frowned, “Did I? Shit, sorry, I got distracted.”

“Because you were dancing with Killua outside?”

He swallowed hard, tried to make it subtle, only to be as obvious as ever, “Uh, yeah—you saw that?”

“Was I not supposed to?” Retz raised an eyebrow, her boots clacking against the wooden floors as she took a step closer to him.

Gon raised his hands in defense, “I didn’t mean it like that! I just didn’t know you were watching, it’s not a problem or anything.”

“Well, in that case,” she smiled, now completely invading Gon’s personal space, “what do you want to do?” she whispered seductively into his ear.

“I, uh, I dunno..” Gon stuttered, his face slightly flushed.

Retz giggled, “Gon, you’re adorable. How about you kiss me?”

His eyes darted around the room for a second, then back at Retz, “Oh, that? Uhh, yeah.”

Retz rolled her eyes with a smile, causing Gon to hit his back against the wall as she practically slammed into him with a kiss.

Her lips were soft, coated with cherry flavored lipgloss. Any man would have been aching with arousal—a girl with the face of a model and the body of a porn star, making out with him passionately as quiet moans escaped her parted lips? Truly something straight out of a late night fantasy.

Despite this, Gon kept his eyes open, and the usual heat rushing to his crotch was absent. He almost didn’t feel attracted to her, for some reason.

It irked him, but he tried his best to enjoy it. Maybe think of other things? Other people? Killua would be good. Mm, Killua’s cute. He wished Killua had been the one kissing him right now.

He’d be almost towering over him, one arm on the wall as he held both of Gon’s wrists above his head. Gon would tease him, and Killua would probably groan, something along the lines of Gon, you’re killing me. Just like he had when they danced together. His pretty pink lips would be so soft and smooth, and his warm tongue sliding into Gon’s mouth would feel like heaven on Earth.

He wondered if Killua would ever kiss him.

And just as Retz pressed her knee into the newfound bulge inside of Gon’s pants—he let out a deep, guttural moan.

She stopped, backing away with a distraught look on her face; eyes wide, mouth hanging so wide open you’d think her jaw had been detached from the rest of her face.

Gon just stared at her with confusion, until—he realized what he had just moaned ever so loudly.

“Fuck, Killua.”

He could have sworn he felt his heart drop right out of his ass.

Oh shit.

Chapter Text

  “…what did you just say?” 

His chest tightened.

“I.. uh, I think—”

“You just said Killua’s name.” She interrupted, surprisingly without a single tear.

Gon felt as if gallons of sweat had poured from his body that very second. His heart was beating so fast he felt as if he was running off of a caffeine high. 

They just stared at each other, Gon had his lips pursed—and was breathing so hard he could’ve powered a windmill.

“I don’t even know what to say.” Retz spoke up, this time her voice cracking as a single tear dropped from her right eye, “Is that what you were doing? Imagining him every time we were together? Is that how you’ve put up with me for this long?” 

“No, Retz, it’s not like that. I—”

“Then what? Tell me Gon.” She cut in once again, her tone growing angrier. 

He stared at her wide eyed for a minute, his head spinning as he attempted to take in what had just happened, what he just did.

“Jesus,” she clutched the right side of her head and she dropped down onto the soft cushion of the bed, “give me a minute to think.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t even speak.” Retz looked up with menacing eyes, before dropping her head back down into her palms.

Gon stood backed up on the wall, antsy as he fearfully waited for Retz’ dictation. The silence was painful, as if it was a thousand little needles stabbing him all over. After about a minute, he began biting his fingernails—an old habit, Killua would’ve been disappointed to see him now. 

He silently cursed himself, why was he still thinking of Killua now? Of all times?

“Come sit next to me.” Retz spoke softly, her voice almost a whisper. 

Gon nodded, and walked his shaky legs over to where she sat, sitting down a few inches away from her. 

“You know this is over, right?” 

He winced, this is exactly what he didn’t want to hear, his worst case scenario was all coming alive.

“…Yeah.”

Then silence.

“Do you love him?” 

His breath hitched, “Retz, I told you—”

She finally looked up at him, her eyes glossy with tears, “Please, just answer me. Just give me that.” 

Gon bit his cheek, “I don’t know, I’m um, just as confused as you are. I’m sorry.” 

He felt so ashamed. 

“I want you to be happy, Gon.” Retz muttered, “I love you, a lot. I’m not going to force you into loving me as your girlfriend if that’s not what your heart wants.”

“I don’t know what my heart wants.” 

She looked at him, her eyes almost pitiful rather than sad, “Your heart wants Killua. Everyone can see it, Gon. The way you subconsciously inch your body closer to his, finding any subtle way to touch him. The starry-eyed staring neither of you think anyone else notices, we all do.” Retz professed, her voice cracking towards the end, “I was stupid to think I could make this work. Make us work. I’m sorry for that. Be with him, Gon, I know you’ll be happy.” 

Gon suddenly felt his heart weigh heavy again, “It’s.. because we’re best friends. Best friends do those things, it doesn’t mean I’m… in-love with him. I… um, love you, Retz.” 

“You can barely even say it.” She sighed, “Don’t say things you don’t mean, we’re past saving. Nothing you say will relieve me of the hurt and humiliation you’ve caused me.” 

He wiped a tear from the corner of his eye, “I’m sorry.” 

“I don’t know if I can accept that.” 

“I know, it’s okay.” 

He listened to the sound of her sniffled breathing as they sat together in silence, both mentally accepting the outcome of the situation. 

“Have a good rest of your night, I’m gonna, uh, go home now.” She said, standing up, “Talk to Killua, okay? I don’t want to be the reason your happiness is restricted. Don’t suppress your feelings for my sake.” 

Gon decided against arguing, and after a moment, he just nodded in acknowledgment and watched her walk out the bedroom door with a weak smile.

Then it hit him like a truck at full speed. His beautiful girlfriend has just walked out the door, and he was probably most-likely-undeniably-a-thousand-percent in love with Killua. 

Damn it, he needed a drink. This type of confusion never sat well with him, especially sober. He needed alcohol in his system, or any drug for that matter. Immediately.

With that, he practically shot downstairs—taking a sneak peak in the kitchen just to make sure Retz had actually left, then marched quickly over to the kitchen; where he immediately began downing shots. Vodka, whiskey, absolutely anything he could get his hands on. 

A voice suddenly startles him, “Are you trying to speed-run a hang over? Dumbass.” 

Gon spins around, then signs in relief, “Zepile, it’s just you.” 

“Who were you expecting?” Zepile asked, raising an eyebrow in half-concern, half-curiosity. 

“Nobody, nothing, forget it. Do you have any weed?” Gon asked hurriedly.

“Since when do you smoke weed?”

“Since Killua taught me how to.” Gon shrugged.

“Ah, I should've known the answer to that one.” Zepile laughed shortly, “But to answer your question, unfortunately no, I do not.”

“Do you have anything else?” Gon asked immediately after he finished his sentence. 

Zepile looked at him with wide eyes for a moment, “What’s the occasion? Girlfriend dumped ‘ya?” 

Gon almost choked on his shot of Hennessy, “No. Do I need an occasion?”

“Killua wouldn’t fuck you?” 

“Is this an interrogation? No, that’s not what happened.” Gon hissed, setting the shot glass down firmly.

“You’re right, I couldn’t imagine Killua doing anything but falling at your feet whenever you please.” He laughed, revealing he was probably already more drunk than Gon could imagine.

“Please, go away.” Gon groaned, placing his palm over his forehead as he felt a blaring head ache coming on. 

Zepile just shrugged with a half smile, then turned around and made his way over to another group with a cheery tone. Gon continued with his mix of cherry vodka and brandy—which he had to force down as the taste was absolutely unbearable.

Truth be told? He had zero clue as to what he was doing. All he knew was that it was kind of working. 

Therefore, he continued chugging down different rancid mixtures, some good, some bad—just anything. He wished Killua was here. Killua would make him the perfect drink to drown the rest of the world out. Except he wouldn’t. Killua would scold Gon for being stupid. 

—

His head ache only got worse as he continued on his alcoholic rampage.

Then, just as every other time—he suddenly felt a hand jerk his shoulder back—and he knew exactly whose hand it was.

“Gon, what the hell are you doing? You’re gonna get alcohol poisoning.” 

“Killuaa, stop it.” Gon cooed.

“Jesus, what’s wrong with you? What happened?” Killua asked with a stern look on his face. 

“Mm, I don’t wanna talk about it. Can you make me a drink?” Gon mumbled, his legs fumbling underneath him as Killua helped him regain balance.

“Why were you asking Zepile for weed?”

Gon rolled his eyes, “Snitch.” 

“He wasn’t snitching. He was informing.”

“I just wanted to have some fun. It is a party after all.” Gon shrugged, Killua didn’t buy it for a second. 

He looked around, his eyes scanning the room around them. Killua pulled Gon towards the direction of Meruem and Komugi, who were both indulging in a board game match against each other. 

Meruem looked up, breaking his focus, “Hey, can I help you guys?”

“Yeah, uh, can we borrow your bedroom for a bit?” Killua asked with a hint of hesitance lingering in his voice. 

“Weird request. Sure, upstairs, second door on the left.” Meruem smirked, “If I find any mysterious liquids, you guys are banned for life.” 

“Jesus Christ.” Killua cursed, dragging Gon along with him. 

“Don’t fuck on my bed!” Meruem called out from behind them, Killua just flipped him off from behind and continued marching up the stairs—despite Gon’s non stop protests.

Killua flung the door wide open, shoved Gon inside by his wrist, and slammed it right back into its former position. 

“Are you gonna tell me what happened, and why you’re acting like an idiot?” Killua hissed, his tone almost scaring Gon. Almost.

Gon flopped down on Meruem’s mattress, bouncing a few times before he settled in a starfish position, “Do I have to?” 

“I have all night, Gon. Don’t test me.” Killua threatened, stepping closer to him and crossing both arms across his chest. 

Gon sat up right, making enough space for another person to settle down next to him, “Can you come sit with me, at least?” 

Killua’s gaze softened, then his arms dropped down to his sides as he nodded and complied to Gon’s request.

Gon scooched closer to him, resting his aching head atop Killua’s hard shoulder. Killua sucked in a deep breath, but quickly corrected his behavior.

“So, are you gonna tell me?” 

“Retz broke up with me.” 

He sucked in again. Killua didn’t reply yet, replacing words with a few soft strokes to Gon’s thick hair. Gon shut his eyes, leaning more and more into Killua’s gentle and reassuring touch. It made him feel better, like everything was gonna be okay. Like he was exactly where he needed to be. With Killua, and no one else.

 A tear rolled down his cheek, Killua reached up and wiped it with a tender swipe of his thumb.

“I’m sorry.” Killua finally spoke, just above a whisper. 

“Don’t be, I kind of earned it.” He sighed.

Killua raised an eyebrow, lowering his head to Gon’s level, “What do you mean—‘you earned it’?”

“Ah, it’s embarrassing.” 

“Really? You’re embarrassed? Wow, the unthinkable has finally happened.” Killua laughed, white tufts of hair bouncing up and down as he did.

Gon gave a soft shove to his chest, but not enough to deprive him of his best friend’s soft touch, of course.

“Don’t tease me! I’m still sad, y’know.” He mumbled. 

“I’m sorry, just trying to lighten the mood.” Killua apologized, “How are you feeling?” 

“A little better. Don’t stop touching me, please.” Gon replied softly, almost in a whimper. 

It was times like these Killua had very much appreciated the extra couple of inches he had on his best friend, otherwise he would have definitely witnessed the blushing mess that was Killua right about now.

Even so, he could surely feel Killua’s heart beat increase exponentially—and he could surely feel how his previously steady touch had turned shaken and messy.

 Maybe his lack of sobriety had hidden it just a little bit, Killua could only hope and pray.

“I still can’t believe I messed it up.” Gon muttered under his breath, barely even audible. Killua would have missed it if he wasn’t so hyper focused on the smaller boy besides him.

“You didn’t mess anything up, Gon.” He reassured, granting another stroke through his hair, “Let’s go home, okay?”

“Mmm, my head hurts, I wanna go to sleep.” 

“You’ll go to sleep soon, come on.” 

Gon nodded. He surrendered his body to Killua as he gently pulled him up from the bed, out the door, and slowly down the wooden stairs; and Gon let him, with sleepy eyes and silence.

“Leaving early?” Komugi said, startling Killua and causing his body to jolt a little. 

“Jesus,” he sighed, “you know, for a blind girl—you’re pretty damn good at sneaking up on people.” 

“I’ve heard that one before.” She laughed, swiping a finger under her nose, “seriously though, the night is still young y’know.”

He raised an eyebrow, “It’s one in the morning. Plus—”

Killua shut his mouth as Gon dropped his head on Killua’s shoulder, grabbing ahold of his middle and index fingers.

“Killua, are we going home yet?” He mumbled drowsily.

Komugi laughed as she began to walk away, “Oh, I see now. Have fun you two.” 

Killua grimaced, if one more person made one more suggestive comment—he was seriously going to lose it. 

“Come on, Gon.” He sighed, opening the door, “You have your shoes, and everything else?” 

“Mhm.” Gon nodded his head, almost cluelessly—and Killua had a feeling they’d be coming back here the next morning to retrieve all of Gon’s forgotten items.

“You guys are leaving already?” Knuckle marched up to them, throwing an arm over the white haired boy, despite their difference in height.

“Yes. Don’t bother us.” Killua shot.

Knuckle chuckled, probably even more drunk than he was during their beer pong game (if that was possible), “I get it. Just don’t go too hard on him, yeah? He still has to be able to run at our next game.”

“Shut up, Jackass, don’t think I’m forgetting about that dare.” Killua hissed, throwing Knuckle’s arm off of him and slamming the door behind him and Gon.

“It feels like people are being weirder than usual.” Gon pointed out, as Killua gently assisted him into the passenger seat, helping him buckle up—being the gentlemen he oh so certainly was. To Gon, anyway.

He didn’t respond, didn’t look Gon in the eye, just shrugged and slammed the car door shut once he was done. The car rocked to the side once his weight slid behind the wheel, and the engine revved loudly as he switched on the power. 

The car ride home was silent, with the exception of quiet background music that was drowned out by the sound of the wheels hitting pavement. Still, mostly quiet—and mostly because Gon had fallen asleep almost as soon as they began driving. 

Soon, Killua pulled into the parking lot of Gon’s house. Switching off the engine and taking a deep breath before exiting to the other side. He opened the car door, intending on waking his sleeping friend—but oh, he looked so beautiful. His makeup was a little smudged from his few shed tears, hair tangled and shaggy, but still as handsome as ever.

Gon was a sleeping beauty, and Killua only wished he could true-love’s-kiss him awake, but a boy could only dream. 

He rummaged inside of the glove compartment in search of Gon’s house keys. Once he found them, instead of rocking Gon awake, Killua scooped the boy up into his arms bridal style—slightly cringed at the cliché—and quickly made his way toward the front door. Killua jammed the key in the keyhole, twisting it more quietly after coming to realize that Mito was most likely asleep.

Once inside, he tip-toed his way up to Gon’s bedroom and placed him carefully onto his bed after removing his shoes and setting them next to his nightstand. Killua raised the blankets, letting them fall on top of Gon in a warm embrace; and once he was about to leave—he heard Gon’s voice call out to him. Maybe he was hearing things.

“Killua, please.” He uttered.

Nope, definitely not hearing things.

Killua turned his head back to look at him, “What?” He whispered. 

Gon squirmed under the blanket, “Please don’t leave.” 

“Gon, I have to, Alluka—”

“Alluka is sleeping at Neon’s, I’m sure Kalluto is too.” Gon interrupted as he sat up straight now, eyes still full of sleep.

Killua raised an eyebrow, “How do you even know that?”

“Mm, not important. Come here, please.” Gon mumbled softly as he flopped back down. 

He paused for a moment, his icy-blue eyes lingering on Gon as he thought it over. I mean, it was a weekend, and his younger siblings weren’t even home, so what’s the harm? 

Everything. It’s Gon we’re talking about here. 

Killua sighed, his own special sign of surrendering, then he turned around fully and made his way to sit next to Gon on his bed. 

“At least change out of these clothes, I’m sure that can’t be comfortable.” Killua insisted, now pulling the blankets off of his best friend. 

“Mmm,” he smiled, “I’m too tired.” 

Killua blinked, then, “Gon, I know what you’re doing.”

“I’m not doing anything.”

Killua rolled his eyes, “fine, put your arms up.”

Gon did as he was told with a bright and drunken smile.

Killua lifted his shirt off of him, taking a second to admire the curve of his bicep, his flat stomach, and his pretty pink nipples. Gon held his eyes closed, so maybe it wasn’t so bad. 

Nevermind, it’s pretty bad.

He cursed himself for his shameless staring. 

Killua continued sliding off Gon’s shorts, revealing pretty tan thighs and a bulge sitting in his boxers. He shook it off, removing Gon’s long socks, then his accessories. He made for Gon’s dresser, rummaging around before finding a large grey t-shirt and tiny black shorts. Maybe he was being a bit selfish, but he deserved it after all he’d been put through tonight. 

He walked back over to Gon, who already raised his hands in the air, awaiting Killua. White strands of hair fell over Gon’s forehead as his best friend leaned in closer to slide the shirt over his head. Then he smiled as Killua pulled the shorts on him, his hands sliding over the soft curve of his ass. 

“Thank you, Killu-aaa.” Gon giggled, falling back down onto the bed.

“Sure.” Killua rolled his eyes while suppressing a small laugh, then walked to the bathroom after grabbing a pair of clothes he thought could maybe fit, and shutting the door behind him. 

He shed his belts, suspenders, and clumsily stumbled over his feet as he stepped out of his pants. Then he pulled off his tank top, and slid into Gon’s oversized T-shirt—fitting him satisfactorily. Once he put on the shorts, he realized they were a little tight, but nothing he wouldn’t be able to get over and tough out.

Killua creaked the bathroom door open slowly, revealing Go, who was standing up now. His grey t-shirt brushing the top of his thighs. 

“Are the clothes good?” Gon spoke, snapping Killua out of his trance. 

“The clothes? Oh, uh, yeah.” He mumbled, walking back into the room with his costume in hand. He tossed it to the corner of the room, then sunk down into Gon’s cushiony bed.

Gon just smiled, joining Killua comfortably. Killua laid flat on his back, and Gon quickly scooched closer to him—placing a leg over his calf and a palm onto his chest. 

Killua stiffened, and his heart beat started speeding—which Gon could now definitely detect. 

“Killua?”

“Hm, what?” 

“What do you like about me?” 

Killua was going to explode any minute now.

“What are you on about now? Aren’t you still upset?” Killua deflected.

Gon suddenly jerked away from him, sitting in a position where he was now facing Killua, looking down at him with a goofy smile.

Killua fought back his own goofy smile, “What?” 

“Tell me what you like about me, please? Or I’ll be sad, this is my way of cheering up.” Gon pleaded, Killua had to take a minute just to observe the look on his face. 

His bottom lipped slightly pouted, eyebrows raised and drawn together, his eyes all wide and innocent like. His shorts barely visible under his large shirt, as if he’d been completely nude hips down. It’s like he was asking to be ruined.

“Killuaa, are you there?”

“Oh, yeah, um.” Killua sputtered, pursing his lips and furrowing his brows.

“Is it really that hard to think of a few things you like about me? I’m hurt, Killua.” Gon said, mocking sadness.

Killua groaned, “Ugh, Gon, you’re gonna tire me out one of these days.”

“That’s the goal.” He smiled.

“Yeah, whatever.” Killua rolled his eyes, “Um, I like, uh.. I like how kind you are.”

“That’s it?”

“Let me finish, you didn’t even give me thirty seconds. You know I’m bad with all this….y’know, sappy stuff.”

Gon groaned loudly, falling back down against the cushion. Killua looked at him, pure infatuation in his eyes.

“Okay, um, this is kind of hard to put into words. Uh, well, I like how straightforward you are, how you never hide the way you’re feeling about someone or something because you’d rather perish than put on an act for someone else. I like how bright and bubbly you are, you never fail to bring me up from rock bottom—and you have this effect on everyone. It’s like when you walk into a room; it becomes Heaven on earth and I wouldn’t ever dream of being anywhere else. I love how you never make me feel as if I’m a burden to you, and how you always let me crash at your place when I can’t stand being at home anymore.” Killua confessed, feeling all his emotions pour out of him at once, “But most importantly, I love how you’re everything I’m not. Pure and untainted.”

Gon stared at him for a few seconds, then, “Wow.” 

“Don’t wow me. You have no idea how hard it was to say all that.” Killua mumbled, turning his head to face the other way.

“I heard the word ‘love’ a couple times.” 

“Don’t tease.”

“Sorry, my brain is still not fully working—I don’t even know if I’ll remember all of this tomorrow, so you’ll have to remind me.” 

“You’re never hearing that speech again, just so you know.” Killua stated firmly.

Gon giggled, “Do you think I’m pretty?”

Is this the same guy who was crying over his ex-girlfriend just a few hours ago?

“I think you’re—um, very pretty.” 

“I’ve been staring at you all night, I don’t know if you’ve noticed.” 

Killua gulped, his face embellished with different shades of pink, “Okay.”

Okay? Damn it, why can’t he bring himself to say anything else? 

“And I think.. you’ve been staring at me too.. a little bit. Haven’t you?”

“I…have.” 

Silence enveloped the room once again, boxing them into their own little world—only the quiet sound of music peering through the cracks in the door and a mixture of soft and ragged breathing could be heard.

Gon laid down and dropped his head into Killua’s lap, looking up at him—Killua refused to return his eye contact. 

“Killua?”

“Mhm?”

“You know, maybe we’re just supposed to end up together or something.” 

He was joking. It was a joke. It didn’t feel like a joke.

“Sure.” Killua attempted to laugh it off.

“Hey, I was being serious!” Gon pouted, “Think about it! We date other people, we break up—but at the end of the day, we always come back to each other.”

“Gon, you’re drunk.”

“Yeah, drunk on love.”

“Stop it, you don’t mean that, you’re acting like this because you’re heart broken.” 

“Killua!” Gon pouted, “I do, I really mean it.”

“Go to sleep, you and Retz just broke up, don’t be a dick.” Killua asserted, his cheeks flaming red.

“I’m not a dick, I know what I want. I realized it today.” Gon continued to press.

Killua sat up, a stern look on his face. “We can talk about it after you’ve slept on it. Go to sleep Gon, now. Or I’m gonna leave.”

“Promise you’ll think about what I said?”

No, absolutely not, he would be shutting it out of his brain for the rest of eternity.

“Yes, Gon, I will think about it.”

“Okay, good.” He smiled, scootching up and closer to Killua, so close only the collar of his shirt showed along with the skin of his pale neck, Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed nervously. 

Gon laid on his side then spread his legs, one just above Killua’s crotch, and the other still on the bed. “Is this okay?” He asked, wrapping an arm around his friend's neck.

Killua tried his best to keep his composure as he pulled the blanket over the both of them, “Yes, go to sleep now, okay?”

“Mhm,” he hummed, “Goodnight, Killua.” 

“Goodnight Gon.”

Gon’s voice dropped to a whisper, “I love you.” 

Killua looked up at the ceiling fan with blank eyes, while his mind and body was going absolutely crazy. Why? This wasn’t all that different from before.

“I love you too.” 

Chapter Text

   The clock was slowly striking eight in the morning, and Killua’s body had begun waking upon instinct. He opened his eyes just barely, blinking himself into consciousness—just to realize Gon was leaning over him like they were some kind of newly weds on their honeymoon waking up next to each other. 

“I was serious last night, y’know.” Gon whispered, his voice as gentle as that of a songbird.

Jesus.

Killua jumped up—slamming his head on the headboard with a yelp, “Gon! What the fuck, dude? You scared me.” 

“Sorry!” Gon scrambled as his face practically turned white. 

Killua looked at him, his eyes narrowing, “What’s up with you? Why are you acting creepy?”

 Then, in a moment of realization and the look of Gon’s excited eyes—“nevermind, I already know, and we aren’t talking about it.”

“Killua! You promised!” He cried.

“I don’t recall such a thing.” 

“You can’t trick me!”

“You must’ve been dreaming.” 

Gon frowned, “Killua, you’re making it awkward.” 

“Me?” He scoffed, “I’m the one who’s making it awkward? Gon, are you even hearing yourself right now?”

Hazel eyes flicked to Killua’s own, before back down at the bed under them. 

Gon let out a sigh, “Okay, forget about it. I have to go to practice, will you come with me?” 

“Tempting.” He said with a weak and very awkward laugh, “But, um, I should be getting home.” 

“You’re making excuses. I know it, I just can’t prove it right now.” Gon grumbled, glaring and eyebrows furrowing.

Oh, how Killua wanted so very badly to fuck that loud mouth of his until he’d stop backing him into corners every damn conversation. 

He shook off the fantasy quickly—a hard on definitely wouldn’t help his case right now.

“I didn’t text Illumi last night, he wants me home. Honest.” Killua sighed, before whipping out his phone, flipping it to face Gon, and scrolling through all of his unread messages from Illumi, “See?”

Rare occasions like this were when he was actually a little grateful for his exhaustingly overbearing brother.

Gon looked at the phone, then at him with empty eyes. Killua hated when he did this, he hated not being able to read Gon’s face—especially when it was hard to decipher exactly what he was thinking most of the time anyway.

“Mm, okay.” He whined, “I’ll see you Monday, then.”

Killua smiled, “Yeah, and I’ll pick you up for school to make it up to you, sounds good?” 

A tinge of blush appeared on Gon’s cheeks and the tip of his nose—an occasion so rare it definitely called for a celebration. 

“Yeah.” He whispered, giving a thumbs up.

______

Soccer practice was especially excruciating on this particular day. 

Gon’s mind was full of Killua and only Killua. 

He looked up at the cloudy sky, picturing the fluffy round clouds as Killua’s sexy morning bed-head. The cold metal of the bleachers pressed against the bottoms of Gon’s thighs—so unappealing in contrast to Killua’s warm and gentle fingers.

He kicked the ball. Killua. He passed to a teammate. Killua. He ran a lap around the track. Killua. He scored a goal. Killua. He juggled the ball. Killua. Killua, Killua, Killua.

Everything was Killua, or was Killua everything? This was all too complicated, he felt his brain getting all hot and steamy how it did when he would make useless attempts at studying for his math tests. Gon didn’t like complexity. He was a simple man who knew what he wanted—and whatever he wanted, he went for and fought to get it. What did he want now? Killua. Killua’s strong arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer as their embrace would feel like it could last forever. 

Killua waking up next to him, running his long fingers through Gon’s messy hair—then planting a soft sleepy kiss on his forehead. They would be so happy together.

Still, it was different when it came to him. Killua was difficult, aloof, stand-offish, every word in the book. You name it. Like a stray cat, or a deer. You had to be careful when approaching, and if you do a little too much a little too quickly he might just up and run off into hiding. 

That’s just how he was. Despite all of it, Gon was proud of the way he’d come when it came to opening up. Gon knew more about him than any other person on the planet, his only two rivals were probably Alluka and Kalluto, and just barely. 

But it was all so weird. Killua was a boy. Gon had never been attracted to a man in the past, nor has he ever in a million years pictured himself with a man. He always imagined himself married to a nice girl his aunt loved and Killua approved of. Now, all he could picture is Killua. Killua was his future, and he’s maybe fine with that, Killua has done nothing but make him happy for all the years they’ve been friends. So was it really all that weird?

“Gon?” 

Gon perks up, realizing he completely forgot he was even at practice, “Oh—yeah?”

“‘Ya feeling alright? You’ve been warming the bench for like, five minutes already. Thinking too hard?” Knuckle asked, looking down at Gon and crossing his arms.

“Uh, yeah. I’m fine, sorry, just a lot on my mind today.” Gon replied, his voice coming out hoarse and strained. 

Knuckle narrowed his eyes and raised an eyebrow, “Listen, I heard about the thing with Retz. Are you sure you’re fine?” 

“What thing? Oh—that thing.” He mumbled, “Yeah, it was pretty mutual.”

“Right, then how’s it with Killua?” 

“What about Killua?”

“Getting to third base anytime soon? Now that you know, Retz isn’t in the picture.” He smirked.

“Knuckle!” Gon laughed, “Third base? What is this? Middle school? Me and Killua aren’t together….like that.” 

“Right. You don’t seem all that upset about the break up though, it kind of says a lot.”

“Can I use up my dare to make you go away and leave me alone for the rest of practice?” Gon grumbled.

“I don’t remember owing you a dare.”

“Uh, well, ‘ya did, so. Go away.” 

Knuckle rolled his eyes, “Don’t be like that, come on, before Morel punishes the both of us.” He said, extending an arm out. 

Gon smiled, grabbing onto it and pulling himself up. They went off in a quick jog towards the middle of the field, where the rest of the varsity team was practicing roundabouts in a large circle and two defenders in the middle.

After an hour and about a thousand different thoughts about the one and only Killua Zoldyck, Gon finished practice and was tucking his cleats away into the bottom of his backpack.  

He tossed the bag over his shoulder, then whipped out his phone and opened Zushi’s messages—who was currently on campus as well, for wrestling practice. They should be wrapping up soon anyway, so he texted him and asked for a ride. Mito had to use the car today, so he had to fall back on his friends again. Which he didn’t mind all that much, considering they were all wonderful and very reliable.

As expected, he replied in a matter of seconds, and they agreed to meet in front of the school. Gon smiled, pocketing his phone and waving goodbye to coach Morel and the rest of his team as he made way towards the front of the building. 

Zushi looked up from his phone once he heard Gon’s footsteps approaching on the concrete ground, smiling ear to ear.

“Hey, man!” Zushi shouted, giving him a swift handshake, “Feels like we haven’t gotten together in a while, I haven’t seen you much in school either.” 

Gon laughed, reciprocating the handshake, “Yep. It’s been a while, just the downsides of being in different grades. Good thing I don’t have a ride today, huh?”

“Sure is. Speaking of, let’s go. I’m parked just over there.” 

“Cool. Lead the way.” 

Zushi nodded, and turned around to walk the other way. Gon followed close behind. He took out his car keys, his tail lights flashing with a single click. Zushi opened the trunk so they could throw their bags inside, then they both slid inside his sedan. 

“So, anything new with you?” Zushi asked absentmindedly as he flipped on his engine, revving a little before backing out of his parking spot and driving off slowly towards the first stop sign.

Gon shrugged, “I guess you could say that.”

Suddenly, Zushi winced, as if he had just remembered something, “Shit—sorry, did I remind you about… ‘yknow?”

“About Retz?” 

Zushi nodded, eyes focused on the road.

“Why does everyone think I’m gonna, like, shatter to a million pieces if you even speak her name? It was just what had to be done, you get it?” 

“Yeah, I guess.” The younger boy sighed, “So, you’re good?”

“I’m doing great, actually. I mean, I was sad at first. But she deserved better than me, she’s a great girl. Really.” Gon admitted with a weak chuckle.

“Ah, yeah. I get it. Anything else interesting happened since the last time we talked?” Zushi asked calmly, using one hand to take a sip from his metal water bottle while the other rested on the steering wheel.

“I think I’m in love with Killua, if you think that’s interesting.”

Zushi choked—and almost swerved out of his lane. 

“Jesus! Zushi! Are you okay!?” Gon cried, gripping onto his seatbelt as he was practically shoved against the glove compartment. 

“Yeah—uh—shit! What? You’re in what with who?” He said, breathing heavily.

“Uh, I said I might be in love with Killua.” 

“Fuck.” 

“What?”

“Now I owe Alluka money.” 

“Zushi!” Gon cried, half-laughing, “Did you two seriously bet on that!?” 

“I mean—it’s obvious. It’s not like everyone doesn’t already know you two are dying to get in bed together, but everyone also knows you’re too stupid to realize it.”

“I do not want to get into ‘bed’ with Killua.” Gon said firmly.

“My point exactly.” Zushi rolled his eyes with a smug laugh. 

“I’ll have you know that I’m a virgin!” He shot back, crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes. 

“Not for much longer.”

“If you weren’t driving right now, I would’ve already thrown you out of the car.” 

Zushi laughed, “Sorry, I’m just joking. Does he know?”

“Mm, I’m.. actually not sure?” Gon replied uncertainly, “I mean, I told him that we should like.. date, but I was drunk, and I think he thinks I was joking.”

Zushi let out another chuckle as he turned onto Gon’s street, “So typical for the two of you. Do you need advice, or anything? I mean, I know I’m not Killua. But I could proudly say I’m a close second.” 

“I mean, I don’t really know how to talk to him about it, I guess. And it’s weird, communication has like…never been a problem for us. So I don’t really know how to go about it, and if I go in too strong—he’ll get all awkward on me.” Gon mumbled, unbuckling his seatbelt as Zushi pulled into his driveway. 

“You’re probably right, you just have to ease him into it I guess.” Zushi shrugged, “Sorry—I know I offered but I’m not all that great at advice… maybe Kurapika would be a better choice.” He added with an awkward giggle.

Gon smiled, opening the car door, “It’s fine. I’ll figure it out. I know him best, anyway. Can you pop the trunk?” 

Zushi nodded with a thumbs up, then watched Gon through his rearview mirror as he swung his backpack over his shoulder and slammed the trunk shut. 

“See you Monday, probably.” 

“Unlikely. But we can dream.” Zushi joked, igniting a laugh from Gon as he waved goodbye and entered his house. 

Mito was still out at the bakery, and he thought about going there to help out a little—but he decided he just had a little too much on his mind at the moment. He was also scared about blabbing off to Mito about his newfound crush, knowing she’d mouth off to the entire town. He loved her very much, yes, but he could admit she was a bit of a loud mouth when it came to Gon—who was practically her son, at this point.

What he wanted to do was call Killua. But he knew Killua would shy away, making up some suspiciously convenient excuse. It was all a little too soon, he just needed to be patient. 

He could go a day and a half without Killua, it’d be a piece of cake. Right? 

Gon flopped back onto his soft bed. The last time he was here, he was with Killua. He missed Killua. He threw his head back with an exasperated groan.

This was definitely not going to be a piece of cake.

______

Both Saturday and Sunday felt like months for both of them, not that they would admit it to each other—of course. At least Killua definitely wouldn’t. Gon? Maybe if Killua asked nicely. 

Regardless, it was finally Monday—and Killua practically sprinted out of his house that morning in order to pick up Gon extra early. He was just thankful he didn’t have morning practice that day, Killua was not looking forward to waking up at four in the morning. 

He threw his backpack into the back seat, then got into his car and drove away as fast as he could to get to Gon’s house. 

A quick handful of minutes, he wasn’t counting nor was he paying attention to the time; but it definitely didn’t take long. It was quick enough for Gon not to be even ready yet—which was reasonable, to be fair. It was only six thirty.

So naturally, Mito let him inside with a welcoming goodmorning—then laughed as he shot up the stairs to Gon’s room. 

He stopped at the door frame; leaning one hand against it and the other on his knee and he bent over in exhaustion.

“Hi. Good morning.” Killua managed to get out in between pants. 

Gon giggled as he threw a plain black hoodie over his half naked body, “Goodmorning to you too. I’m happy you were so excited to see me.” 

“I wasn’t that excited.” Killua grumbled as he stood up straight. 

“Right.” Gon sharply, unconvinced. “Anyway, are we gonna leave now?”

Killua raised both eyebrows and shrugged, “I mean, if you’re ready. I was hoping we could get to school early and get some extra work done, I don’t want to be swamped with homework on Halloween weekend.” 

“Sure. I barely had any time to get ready though, do I look okay?” He asked with pure eyes. 

Okay doesn’t even begin to cover it.

“Yeah, you look fine. Is your bag packed?” 

“Mhm!”

“Great, let's get a move on.” Killua huffed as he picked up Gon’s bag and turned to walk away. 

“Aw, look who’s being a gentleman.” Gon teased with a snicker as he followed. 

“Gon.”

“Sorry!” 

They went the rest of the way down the stairs in silence, only talking again to say goodbye to Mito; then they were on their way to the school. 

Gon had fallen asleep in the car. Again. Killua laughed at him, at the same time appreciating the sleeping beauty. He glanced over at the boy anytime he could. Stop signs, cross lights, you name it.

He decided he was unfortunately too far in to ignore his wandering eyes, therefore finally embraced it. 

Once they arrived, he parked and turned off his engine. Taking another quick moment to admire Gon before finally waking him. 

“Hey,” he whispered as he shook Gon’s shoulder, “we’re here, pretty.”

“Mngh?” Gon moaned as he slowly stirred awake, “huh?”

Killua coughed, unbuckling his own seatbelt before clicking open Gon’s, “I said, we’re here, shitty.”

“Oh, okay.” 

Before Gon could even fully take in his surroundings, Killua was already opening the car door for him, waiting until he got out sleepily, then closed the door behind him. He then grabbed both of their bags out of the back seat, and threw one over each of his shoulders.

Gon laughed, “Killua, give me my bag, you don’t have to hold it.” 

“Nah, I need it anyway, I’ve been skipping my workouts recently.” He insisted, locking his car and marching forward.

Gon rolled his eyes, then quickly jogged back up to Killua—his long legs carrying him further than Gon’s could ever. 

“How come you’re being so nice to me today? Picking me up? Opening the door for me? Holding my bag?” Gon asked with suspicion.

“I always pick you up.” Killua dismissed. 

“You don’t always open my door, or carry my heavy bag.”

“I told you, it’s because I’ve been skipping the gym.”

“You still opened the door for me, that doesn’t benefit you at all.”

“Please, you were still barely conscious. I was saving time.” Killua scoffed. 

Gon furrowed his eyebrows, “I’m onto you.” He grumbled.

Killua brushed him off. They both walked in through the main entrance, scanning their IDs and immediately going for the library doors. 

Killua held the door open for him, once again. Gon narrowed his eyes at the taller boy as he walked through, not breaking eye contact once—despite how ridiculous he might have looked. 

They sat down at one of the tables in the back left corner, Killua immediately took out his AP environmental science homework. Gon did not cease his staring. 

Killua looked up, the feeling of Gon’s eyes like fire on his skin, “What?”

“We need to talk.” Gon whispered.

“Yeah, we need to talk about how you’re failing pre-calc. Maybe you should get some work out.” Killua said, his eyes now practically burning holes into his paper to avoid eye contact. 

“Killu-aaa.” Gon whined, almost moaned. 

Killua felt blood rush down to his crotch—but he quickly blocked it out to the absolute best of his ability. 

“Do your work. Please.” Killua sighed, scribbling something down. 

Gon mumbled something incoherent under his breath, then “Fine.” 

They worked in silence until the first five minute bell rang. 

Which, pretty much describes the rest of their school day. They didn’t talk, they barely even looked at each other. Killua almost thought that Gon could be mad at him. But he wouldn’t talk to him about it. He couldn’t. He just knew he would mess it all up, it was best he didn’t meddle with his best friend's love life. Even if he might have been the center of it right now. Gon will get over it, eventually.

Killua still had to drive him home, as awkward as it would be. And he did. 

The entire drive was silent, they only talked to say their goodbyes as he dropped Gon off at his house. 

This was essentially how their entire week went. Killua picked up Gon in the morning, they barely talked. They had lunch together, barely talked. Then Killua drove him back home at the end of the day, and only a few words would be spoken. A couple sentences, at best.

When the school week had come to an end on Friday—Killua finally popped the question.

“Are you upset with me?” He said, fingers tightly gripping the steering wheel.

“No. I’m just confused.” Gon replied simply.

“I think I am too.” 

A moment of silence between the two of them. Not awkward as it had been throughout the week, but somewhat reassuring.

“Are we still on for Halloween night on Saturday?” Killua spoke again.

“Do you want to be?” 

“I do, yeah.”

“Then yeah, we are. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Gon spoke even more flatly before exiting the car, Killua waved him goodbye as he watched him enter the house—immediately receiving a warm hug from Mito. 

She looked at Killua from the doorway, waving to him, then saying something to Gon with a concerned look on her face. Probably something about why he hadn’t brought Killua over all week, but Killua didn’t feel like dealing with it right now. So he drove off.

Then—a text from Gon. 

‘I’m not mad, I’ve been missing you all week’

‘I can’t wait for tomorrow 😊💜’

He smiled and clutched the phone close to his heart. It was small, but it was reassuring nonetheless. 

Chapter Text

    Killua shifted his weight from foot to foot nervously as he waited outside of Gon’s front door. The loud thunder boomed in his ears, as a small trickle of rain began coming from the sky. He was dressed comfortably in light blue silk pajama pants, a long-sleeved silk buttoned pajama shirt—and a coat to battle against the annoyingly chilly October weather. Of course, his outfit choice wasn’t really his own. Gon had as usual forced them into matching, but Killua didn’t mind. Not really. 

He wore his hair as always, as fluffy and unpredictable as a cloud in the sky. The only thing substantially different about him was the overwhelming feeling of nervousness brewing inside of him. Killua felt as if he had an entire family tree of butterflies fluttering around crazily in his belly. He took a deep breath in, then exhaled while shutting his eyes.  

In his bag he carried oreos, chocolate covered pretzels, various types of chocolate bars, and pounds upon pounds of skittles. Gon’s request, of course. Mito would never buy him as much candy as Killua would. Gon was lucky to have him.

The very last thing he carried was a gift for Gon, a teddy-bear wearing a pumpkin costume. Killua thought it was adorable, even though he didn’t typically like this kind of stuff, Gon was a sucker for sweet gifts. He also brought him a pair of fuzzy skeleton socks, but that’s less relevant. 

He pulled his hood over his head, then wrapped himself in a tight embrace, having been standing outside for about five minutes now. Killua began to think Gon was bailing on him—until he heard a loud: “Mito!! Why didn’t you tell me Killua was at the door?!”

Then: “I didn’t know! Hurry up and let him in before the poor soul freezes to death!” 

Killua smiled, this was a family he would like to be part of forever. A family with Gon. Maybe their own one day. He would probably take Gon’s last name—just the name ‘Zoldyck’ sends shivers down his spine.

Finally, the door swung open—revealing Gon, who was dressed in the same exact thing as him, only light green and without a big puffy jacket.

“Hi.” Killua smiled shyly, still rubbing his arms in the cool weather.

Gon returned it, his smile even wider and more welcoming, “Hi. Come in, sorry, I didn’t realize you were at the door.”

“It’s fine.” Killua shrugs, wiping his tasman boots on the welcome mat, then stepping inside and leaving them by the door.

“Hi Killua!” Mito called, peeking out from the kitchen before returning to what she was doing, “I don’t mean to spoil Halloween night for you boys, I’m just finishing up a couple things and I’m heading over to Menchi’s. So don’t worry about me!” 

“Oh, don’t say that, I don’t mind you staying at all, and Gon doesn’t either.” Killua shouted back in a sweet tone receiving a glare from Gon. 

“You’re too sweet!” She laughed.

“What?” Killua whispered, still unsure of what the unprovoked glaring was about. 

Gon didn’t reply, just shrugged and walked back to the living room. 

Killua brushed it off easily, Gon was just being Gon. As usual, a little weirdo who refused to do anything that actually made sense to a normal person. 

He dropped his coat off on the bench by his door, then followed him into the already set up living room. It was perfect as usual, Gon and his aunt really had a taste for these kinds of things. He would decorate their future house so well. Maybe they’d get one with a beach front, so they could watch the lazy sun hug the purple skies above the waters as it set.

The back of the TV was framed with purple and orange LED lights, the big lights were off, the only thing illuminating the room was the TV and the many varieties of fall scented candles—the small flame dancing within the glass walls.

The two couches were pressed together, creating a sort of large bed, a small space left for hanging your legs off onto the ground. They were covered in pumpkin and ghost themed blankets, and crowded with plain white pillows. A few snacks were already prepared on the coffee table—a bowl of popcorn, pumpkin cupcakes, and white chocolate covered strawberries. Killua’s mouth watered at the mere sight. 

Gon was already sprawled out comfortably, patting on the spot next to him invitingly. Killua dropped his bag on the floor next to the coffee table, taking out the stuffed bear and socks.

“Here. Uh, I got this for you.” Killua mumbled under his breath, extending the gifts out with his hand for Gon to grab.

Gon looked at him with wide eyes for a second—before erupting into a star struck smile, “Aw, Killua. For me?” 

Killua nodded. He was probably so red right now. And he was so hot he felt as if he would explode any second now. 

Gon grabbed both, and Killua finally sat next to him. He watched as Gon unpackaged the socks, sliding them over his bare feet. 

“They’re nice and warm, thanks Killua. I love both.” 

“Yeah, you’re welcome.” He sputtered, looking anywhere but into the smaller boy's eyes. 

“Guys, I’m leaving, okay?” Aunt Mito said as she peeked her head through the living room arch. 

“Bye, be safe!” Gon said, Killua nodding in agreement. 

“I will. You boys will be good, I assure.” She said, before shutting the door behind her and locking it, not waiting for a response.

“You’ll be good, right Killua?” Gon asked, looking up at him. Almost teasingly. 

“Uh, yeah? What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked with a raise of his eyebrows.

“Mm, nothing.” Gon shrugged, “What movie should we watch first?”

Killua looked up for a moment as he thought about it, “Uhhh, what about All Hallows eve?” 

“That’s a bit extreme. Do you want me to have nightmares about some scary clown chopping me into a bunch of tiny pieces?” Gon asked, acting offended. 

“It’s not that bad.” Killua said, throwing both arms behind his head, biceps flexing through thin silk. “What do you want to watch?” 

“Hm, how about we start with a classic? Like the nightmare before Christmas?” He suggested.

“That’s a Christmas movie.” 

“Uh, no it’s not.”

“It literally has Christmas in the name.”

“Killua, it’s a Halloween movie! I can’t believe you right now. It’s like I don’t even know you.” Gon cried with a hand over his heart.

Killua rolled his eyes with a toothy grin, “Fine, let’s watch the Christmas movie on Halloween, whatever.”

“It’s a Halloween movie!”

“Okay, let’s watch the Halloween movie. You’re seriously such a little princess, Gon.”

A smile flickered on his lips, quickly disappearing, “Whatever. Get cozy.” 

Killua tucked himself in comfortably under one of the several blankets lying on the couch, both of his arms resting on the back rest behind him. Gon picked up the remote, and not-so-subtly scooted closer to Killua as he flipped through Netflix.

Gon turned on The Nightmare Before Christmas, upped the volume to sixty, then grabbed the bowl of popcorn; placing it in his lap and inching even closer to Killua. 

Killua tried his best to ignore it, because he knew the exact reason Gon was acting like that. No way it was happening, they wouldn’t talk about it, and they would both pretend to be oblivious as ever. It was how Killua handled most if not all of his queries and problems. It can’t bother him if he refuses to acknowledge it, right? 

Gon looked up at him, then back at the screen—up at him, back down at the screen. Killua pretended not to notice. Whatever Gon was up to, he didn’t feel like dealing with it right now.

Eventually, Gon let out a quiet grunt and fell back to the other side of the couch, crunching aggressively as he stuffed popcorn down his throat.

Gon sat upright, sitting with his legs criss-crossed, “Killua?” 

“Mm?” Killua hummed, eyes still straight on the screen ahead of him. 

“I’ve been thinking,”

“Uh, well don’t.” He interrupted with a soft laugh. 

If looks could kill—Killua would’ve been a dead man this very second. 

“Fine.” Gon grumbled.

“Am I in trouble?”

“Nope.” He said simply, popping the ‘p’, “ Not, at, all.” 

Killua looked at him for half a second, then returned his eyes to the screen, “….Alright.” 

They finished the rest of the movie in silence, it wasn’t really awkward—but it was clear some kind of tension was probably in the air.  No doubt.

“Terrifier next?” Killua teased.

“I am not watching that.” Gon said almost immediately, “Let’s watch the live action scooby doo movie.”

“Sure, whatever.” Killua mumbled.

Then—the process repeated. Lingering looks from Gon as Killua kept his eyes glued tight to the screen in an effort to pretend as if he didn’t notice. 

“Killu,” Gon cooed, dragging out the ‘oooooo’. 

“Mhmm,” Killua replied absentmindedly, so focused on not looking at Gon that he forgot to blink. Or breathe. Or anything else, for that matter. He was no longer a functioning human being around this guy. Nor was he ever, these days.

Gon scowled, grabbing the remote control and clicking pause. Killua kept his eyes aimed in the same direction.

“Why’d you pause it?” He asked, as if he didn’t already know the answer to his silly question.

“Can you look at me?” Gon ignored him, his tone almost desperate. 

It made Killua wince a little, he was kind of being an asshole right now. He could try being a little bit nicer while also avoiding the fuck out of Gon’s scary questions. So he turned his head, and made unfortunate eye contact with him.

“Okay. Can we please talk?” He sighed, “Don’t run away this time, please.” 

“What is there to say?” 

“I need to say something.”

Killua raised an eyebrow, “Go on...” He muttered hesitantly. 

“I’ve been.. uh, thinking about something a lot recently. Other than you. Or I mean—it is about you, but, you know.” Gon stumbled over his words like a teenage girl talking to a boy for the first time. 

Killua cleared his throat, trying to control himself just enough not to burst into flames, “And that is?” 

“Our kiss.” 

He laughed out loud, clutching his chest, relieved at the words. Gon was joking, he had to be. 

“Hilarious, how about we go back to watching the movie?” 

Gon’s face stayed the same, serious and without any signs of humor.

“Oh, um.” Killua sucked in his breath, then, “Gon, that was like, five years ago, and we were thirteen, and it wasn’t even like that. Why this all of a sudden?” 

“It’s… because of the fact that it wasn't like that, that’s why I’ve been thinking about it.” He admitted, now refusing eye contact and staring down into his lap. 

Killua swallowed, “Okay. And this means what?” 

“That I want to kiss you, so very badly, right now.” 

This was his limit. He felt his face and ears erupt into colorful shades of pink and red, just as he felt his heart skip one or maybe two or maybe ten beats. 

“N-no, no you don’t.” Killua finally managed to say. 

“You don’t know that!” 

“Gon, please, you’re just confused.” 

“No I’m not. And you know it, too. You want the same exact thing as me. Don’t you?” Gon cried. 

“I don’t…want that.” Killua whispered.

Gon flinched, his facial expression saddening for a second, before going right back to pure frustration, “Then what do you want?” 

He looked at him for a moment, with sad eyes and parted lips. He didn’t even know how to answer that. 

“I can’t…I don’t..” Killua stammered, so overcome with emotions he had no idea what to make of them anymore. 

“Killua,” Gon whimpered, the lower half of his eyes becoming glossy.

Killua just stared. He stared with a look in his eyes Gon had never seen before in all their years of friendship. Gon stared back.

“Jesus—fuck—fine. I want to kiss you. I want to kiss you so much. You’re so beautiful, so perfect. I want to do everything with you—I want you.” He finally admitted in a frenzy. “God damn it, Gon.”

Killua knew the words were coming from his mouth, but they didn’t feel like his own. It was as if some strange being from outer space had gotten tired of watching them act like idiots and came to possess his stupidly in love body. That must have been what happened, because he would never say these things. Not without short circuiting, of course.

“But then, why have you been avoiding it? I thought it was obvious I felt the same. Have I not been stressing it enough? You’re usually better at picking up these things than I am.” 

“Because, Gon. What would it have changed? Tell me, honestly, you and Retz just broke up. And I know you, you aren’t going to take me seriously. It’ll all come tumbling down on us along with our friendship, all because of some stupid selfish needs—no, not needs—wants. Selfish wants.” Killua snapped. 

“That’s not true Killua. It’s not fair that you say that.” Gon rebutted. 

Killua stayed silent, panting and looking him directly in the eyes, as if instructing him to go on. 

“Me and Retz broke up because I’m head over heels for you, Killua. I want to take you seriously—I want to take us seriously. But I can’t if you don’t let me. Maybe I dated other girls….people in the past, but none of them were you. Please, Killua, let me prove myself to you. I want this, you, us.” Gon went on and on, waving his arms around in hopes to get his point across.

Killua didn’t reply. Just stared at him. He admired the passionate look on his face, and he shivered as a strange feeling overtook his body. He felt weird, he felt warm and tingly. Gon kept his eyes fixed on him, a small tear in the corner of his eye, almost going unnoticed by Killua. 

Killua finally spoke up, his voice hoarse, “Is this what you really want?”

“More than anything else in the world.” 

Another wave of silence.

Then, “Fuck, Gon.” Killua huffed, his fingers rubbing his forehead and breathing still ragged. 

Before Gon could even begin to ask what was wrong—Killua pounced—and smashed their lips together. He pushed himself in between Gon’s spread legs, knocking the popcorn straight out of his lap and all over the couch. 

“Mm—Killua! The popcorn!” Gon shouted, his worries barely making it past Killua’s wild lips. 

“Fuck the popcorn.” He said with a feral look in his eye, giving Gon just about a second to gasp before reuniting their lips.

Gon’s eyes were still wide with shock, excitement creeping in as he fluttered them shut and wrapped his legs around Killua’s waist, then his arms around his neck—pulling him in even deeper. 

Killua let him. He didn’t care about anything right now. Even if this was going to ruin their friendship forever, he felt so selfish right now. He couldn’t keep fighting his urges, the natural way of his body. Nothing else mattered in the world right now except kissing Gon. This would have to be future-Killua’s problem. He earned this.

Gon’s lips were soft and warm against his, coated with spit—either his own or Killua’s—it was hard to tell at this point. Killua felt hot against him, it was like a fire had ignited in between the two of them. 

It felt right. 

He was kissing Gon Freecss. And it felt like the rightest thing to ever be right.

Killua groaned into the kiss as he traced circles along Gon’s jawline. He’d been wanting this for so long, he was going to savor every second with as much greed as possible. Gon threw his hands into Killua’s hair—fisting soft white chunks just a bit too roughly.

It hurt. But Killua didn’t care, Gon could’ve punched him square in the jaw right then and there—and yet he’d still shake it off and smash their lips right back together in a Gon deprived frenzy. 

Their mouths moved fast, as if they were running out of time and needed to kiss as much as possible before they would be ripped away from one another, as if they would never be able to do this again. 

Gon arched up into him ever so naturally, it was as like they had done this a million times before. Killua pushed down onto him instinctively. It was like their bodies were made for each other, fitting together like two matching pieces in a puzzle—like magnets to a fridge, it felt so natural, more natural than anything else they’ve done. Something apparently wrong could never feel like this. They were meant to do this.

Then—Killua realized something.

Gon was hard. So was he. He hadn’t even realized what he was doing or what he was touching. 

And they were practically dry humping.

Shit, this was now future Killua’s problem. He was future Killua.

Immediately, and very surprisingly to Gon—Killua pushed off of him, now sitting up right still in between his legs. A line of spit connected them together, to Killua’s horrifying embarrassment.

Gon looked up at him with arousal in his eyes, a glint of sweat sticking a small piece of black hair to his forehead, his lips parted and swollen from the abuse. His eyebrows were raised and upturned, and saliva coming out the side of his mouth. It was almost sinful how much more excited it made Killua. He wanted nothing else right now but to unravel Gon, make him his own before anyone else could.

But no, it was all too much all too soon. 

“Mm, what’s…what’s wrong? Why’d you stop?” Gon whimpered, as if he actually needed more.

“Um, you know,” Killua mumbled, eyeing Gon’s erection and then his own before looking back up into big brown eyes, “that.”

Gon looked down at his hardened dick bulging through his shorts, then shifted his gaze to Killua’s—eyes lingering a few seconds too long before finally snapping out of it.

Then, “What’s wrong with it?” Simple. As if he was only asking about the weather or what was for lunch.

“Are you… uh, serious?” Killua asked, dumbfounded.

Gon blinked. “Yeah? I wanted to kiss you, you wanted to kiss me. So we did. Now we both want to—”

“Please, don’t even finish that sentence.” Killua cut him off, pressing a warm palm to his mouth. He let it drop back down after a few seconds. 

“Killua,” He groaned, “you’re too confusing. I hate it when you expect me to just know what you’re thinking all the time.” 

Killua sighed and went back to his former position on the couch. He sat about half a foot away from Gon with his legs pressed firmly against the carpet—just to remind him that this was all real and really happening—not just another one of his weird dream fantasies. 

“I don’t know.” He murmured quietly, “Gon—what is this? Ever since…ever since the party last Friday, it’s been weird. What is going on between us? Why did we, um, do that…just now? Why did you let me?”

Gon looked up for a short minute, pursing his lips and pressing a finger to the tip of his nose. “What do you want to be going on between us? I mean, I want to.. hold you, and touch you, kiss you ‘n stuff. So…. whatever that means.” He said, almost with embarrassment and without looking Killua in the eye. “And, I don’t really have a reason, um, to why I let you—I guess I just—wanted to?”

“Oh, um, right.” 

Gon perked up, hope flickering in his eyes, “Is that okay? Do you feel like that, too?” 

Killua choked, eyes darting around the room in a panic. Look at anything but Gon. Anything but Gon. 

“Ah, um, I don’t… I don’t… you know, I’m—”

“We don’t have to talk about it right now….we can go back to what we were doing before.” 

Killua just stared at him, fingers twiddling around and mouth open as if he were going to say something but was at a loss of words.

Which he most definitely was.

Gon flinched, a rare light blush forming across tan cheeks as he threw his hands up to plead innocence, “The movies, I mean! I meant, um, the movies.” 

“Oh, yeah. The movies.” 

More silence. 

“Ah. You know, it’s actually..” he paused, checking the time on his phone, ten thirty. Damn, could he even say it was late? Usually these lasted all night. Killua cleared his throat, “I actually have something to do tomorrow, so, I should get home. Sorry to cut the fun short.” He finished with a short and awkward laugh. 

“Oh. Okay.” Gon said, his bright eyes now turning sad. Almost tired like. He got up, pushing past the pillows on the floor, “I’ll walk you out.” 

“Mhm.” Killua nodded, following him to the door. 

Gon watched as Killua slipped his shoes on and threw his arms inside of his jacket, “You sure you don’t want to take anything home with you? I won’t be able to eat all of those sweets myself, you know.”

“Nah, it’s fine. Illumi doesn’t really know I’m here, so,” 

“Ah.”

“Yep.”

“So, I’ll see you at school?” Gon attempted at one last moment of conversation, clasping his hands together in front of him.

“Yeah. Try not to get too sick eating all of that. Goodnight, Gon.” 

He wanted to kiss him goodbye. But he knew he couldn’t, and he wouldn’t ask Gon to. It’d be incredibly selfish, after basically walking out on him after something so intimate. So he just smiled weakly as Gon waved him goodbye, then shut the door behind him.

Killua let out a long, drawn out sigh. He could see it in front of him, the cold air mystifying his breath. 

What was he doing? Was this not what he wanted? He slapped both palms to his face with a groan. Feelings are so weird. He never felt like this when it came to Kenji or any of his other exes, so how was he supposed to deal with it? 

Maybe, for once, he shouldn’t run away from it. 

This is a horrible idea. 

..is what he thought when he spun around and banged loudly on the locked door in front of him. 

This is a horrible idea.

He thought again as the door creeped open, then fully. 

“Killua?” Gon said, his voice barely above a whisper, “What are you—” was all he managed to get out before he was quickly slammed against the back wall. The door was still wide open, letting in a cold breeze. Killua put one arm over Gon’s head and on the wall, then his other one stayed cupping his cheek. 

“Gon,” he whispered.

Gon swallowed, but attempted his best not to look nervous in front of him, “…Yes, Killua?” 

“I, um,” 

“Wait.” Gon interrupted. Killua just stared blankly, looking confused as ever. “Sorry, can we just—close the door? One of us doesn’t have a coat on… you know.” 

Killua’s face quickly flashed red, and an “oh” was all he managed to squeak out before shutting and locking it. 

“Um, yeah, anyway.” Gon laughed, Killua went back to their former position. 

“Uh, right, um. I wanted to say that.. I want.. fuck.” 

Gon smiled understandingly, he knew these kinds of things were hard for his friend. He could take things slow, even though he’d rather charge at everything full speed. “Take your time.” 

“You’re making fun of me.” Killua grumbled.

“No! I’m serious!” Gon cried, looking up at the boy who was currently towering over his shorter frame. 

“Mm, okay. Uh, anyway. I was saying, "I want you, Gon.” Killua finally managed to get out, then shut his eyes tightly before adding, “I also want to kiss you and hold you and whatever that other stuff was.” 

“So, you’re gonna ask me something?” Gon asked with a smug smirk. 

“What? Oh—right.” Killua cleared his throat, “Gon, can I be your—”

“Where are my flowers?” 

“…Excuse me?”

“You’re gonna ask me out without flowers? Wow, Killua. I mean, I didn’t take you for a romantic but I think I deserve it after your evasive behavior all of last week.”

“Jesus Christ, Gon. Where do I get flowers at this time?” Killua sighed, pushing off the wall so that he stood up right. 

“The Walgreens is still open. You have, like, fifteen minutes.” 

“You are unbelievable, and I’m gonna kill you.” was the last thing Killua said before sprinting to his car and angrily speeding away. Safely, of course—Killua could only imagine the earful he’d get from Gon after crashing just before officially asking him out. 

He quickly parked, marching into the store. The only flowers left were light pink roses, the edges slightly withered, leaving a discolored color on a few of the petals. Killua picked them up, eyeing them closely. He eventually sighed and shrugged, figuring that this was the best he’d be able to get at this hour of the night. As he made his way to pay, he picked up a box of ferrero rocher chocolates. Gon would probably like these. If he didn’t, it’d be a treat for Killua for having to deal with him.

The young woman at the register seemed uninterested as she watched Killua walk up the counter, tapping her long nails on the marble. Killua felt like a bother, he knew she just wanted to get home—but then again, Gon was more important. 

“Just these, please.” 

She raised an eyebrow as she scanned it, “Do you need a bag?” 

“Uh, no thank you.” Killua said politely, paying with his credit card then grabbing the flowers and chocolates from her outstretched hands. 

“Late night hook-up?” 

“Sorry?”

“Nevermind, have a good night sir.” She shrugged, not sounding sincere what-so-ever. 

Killua gave a concerned look, then hopped in his car and drove just a little bit faster back to Gon’s house. He had been waiting for this, and he didn’t want to delay it any further. 

He stopped crookedly in the driveway, then sprinted towards the door. Gon was already sitting on the stairs waiting for him as he opened it.

“Hi.” Gon smiled sweetly, as if he didn’t just make Killua haul ass to Walgreens at ten at night. 

“Hi,” Killua panted, very much out of breath, trying to speak in between inhales and exhales, “I got….these…..for you. And…these” 

“Aw, Killua, you got me chocolates too?” 

“Yes. Be grateful.” 

Gon laughed. Killua loved that laugh. It was like the angels coming down from heaven and personally serenading him. 

“So, as I was saying,” Killua smiled nervously, walking toward Gon who then stood up to match his height. As well as he could, anyway. “Gon Freecss, may I be your…uh, boyfriend?” Killua managed to say, his face as pink as the flowers. 

“A thousand times yes—no, a million times yes.” Gon giggled, wrapping his arms around Killua’s neck and pulling him into a tight hug.

Killua exhaled in relief, wrapping his arms around Gon’s back and returning the embrace. When they pulled away, Gon had a goofy smile plastered across his face. 

The taller boy tilted his head, “What?” 

“This means we’re boyfriends now?” 

Killua averted his eyes to the ground, “Um, yeah, I guess we are.”

“So, that means we can finish our movie night?” 

Gon was met with a dumbfounded look, as if Killua had forgotten all about their original plans, then, “Yeah, yeah we can.” 

So they returned to the couch (right afterwards Killua had rightfully cleaned up the popcorn mess after ever so rudely knocking it over earlier), only this time—Gon’s head laid comfortably over Killua’s shoulder—Killua was tense as ever, of course. Despite that, it was nice to know his strange feelings were reciprocated. 

Gon turned on Hocus Pocus, and they didn’t speak again until about halfway through the movie. 

“Gon?”

“Mhm?” 

“Can we talk?” 

Gon raised an eyebrow, sitting up to look at the boy next to him and pausing the movie. “What’s up?”

“It’s um, about earlier. When I wanted to stop kissing you because, um—you remember.” Killua replied, scratching the back of his head anxiously. 

“I remember.”

Killua bit his lip, “I just, uh, wanted to tell you that… I want to take all of this slow, okay?” 

“Mhm?”

“I want everything to be special…because, well—you’re special, really god damn special. I don’t even want to think about you in, uh, that way, until I’ve taken you on a real date. I also think it would be the best… for us.” Killua twiddled with his thumbs while avoiding eye contact. “I know you like to rush into things blind, but I don’t want….this,” he said, gesturing to the both of them with a finger, “to be one of them. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

Gon raised an eyebrow, “You’re saying you don’t want to have sex with me?” 

Killua was once again caught off guard. 

“Fuck, Gon, you’re so blunt. You can’t just say it like that—and yes, I do—I mean, you worded that terribly!” He groaned loudly. 

“So, you don’t want to have sex with me yet?”

“Uh, yeah—that. Or anything else past, like, kissing… or holding hands.” 

“No hugging?” 

“Yes, that, hugging. Gon, you know what I mean, stop trying to make me spell it out for you just so you can tease me.” 

Gon chuckled, inching closer on his knees and running a hand through soft white hair, “You caught me.” 

Killua rolled his eyes, trying to ignore the smile tugging at his lips and the uncomfortable heat rushing to his face. 

“Well, that’ll be a challenge for you.” Gon shrugged, flopping back down against the couch pillow. 

“At least I have some self control, Freecss.” Killua said in a mocking tone, then reached for the remote to unpause the movie. 

Gon’s smile returned to his face, then he plopped his head down into Killua’s lap, continuing the movie in silence.

This was nice. They both hoped that they could do this forever, stay here forever, together. 

“Are you sleeping over?” Gon asked. 

Killua looked down at him, “I…can. Do you want me to stay with you?” 

“Yes, please. I would like that.”

“Okay. I’ll be here.” 

“Promise?”

“I promise.” Killua smiled.

“Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?” Gon asked tiredly.

Killua looked up for a moment to think, then back down at the boy in his lap, “Mmm, I guess it can wait until the morning.” 

Gon nodded, his face turning happy and his eyes fluttering shut, slowly drifting into sleep.

Gon was so pretty when he slept, Killua could never help but admire the boy while he laid. So vulnerable, so trusting. He liked thinking about it. Gon trusted Killua, Killua would protect Gon no matter what. Gon is Killua’s treasure, even if he would never say it. Not in words, anyway. Maybe in a form of mean insults and physical violence. 

After a few minutes, he figured the movie was boring anyway and that it didn’t make sense for him to watch without Gon. He should go to sleep as well. 

Another thing he figured was that he was in a very sticky situation—and that it would be very hard to change into a comfortable sleeping position without waking the sleeping Gon. 

Regardless, he took on the challenge, slowly shifting his body downward, and gently dragging Gon up to him by his waist. Sure, this would probably be incredibly embarrassing the next morning. Once again, that’s future Killua’s problem. Not his.

He was going to enjoy this to the fullest. 

Killua now laid down on his side, almost spooning Gon while he traced lines up and down his back. He liked it like this, being able to act like this and doing these kinds of things with Gon without suffering from his usual embarrassment. Gon didn’t know it was happening, therefore there was no reason to be shy. He wished he could be like this all the time, touching and loving without hesitance. He’ll get there, eventually.

This was okay for now.