Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Tenna watched as Toriel’s sleeping form drifted gently to the ground. Sure, this wasn’t what the knight had wanted, but after everything Tenna had put the trio through he was sure he could get the knight to understand if he ever saw them again. Besides, this was a much better ending to the story in Tenna’s opinion. The brave heroes had shown their dastardly villain the light through their kindness and once again the power of friendship had saved the day. How marvelous a story! How grand an ending! Yes, this would be for the best.

“Here you go!! She’s all yours, folks!!” Tenna beamed, “How wonderful!! The family’s all together again!! Now you can all finally—”

Suddenly, Tenna found himself falling… falling? No, no that wasn’t right. He’d been… he’d been knocked over. He’d… he’d been attacked! Yes, that was right. Someone had attacked him! Someone had blasted him with their magic. Someone had blasted him with their very familiar magic and knocked him over.

“…Mailman!?” Tenna had let out before his electrons could fully catch up with him.

Spamton was here. Spamton was here right now! Of all of the times for that crook to return and he chose now!? Forget being a mailman, that little traitor should have been a gameshow host! That slimy con-man had attacked him right as he was about to give Toriel back to the lightners! Was… was Spamton here to steal Toriel and hand her over to the knight!? No, no, Tenna couldn’t let that happen! Tenna had to protect Toriel! Tenna had to protect Kris! Tenna had to protect—

… Spamton?

That… that thing couldn’t possibly be Spamton.

Spamton had never looked so small.

Spamton had never looked so afraid.

What in the world could scare the Spamton G. Spamton?

Oh.

The knight was here…

The knight had their blade raised high—

The knight was right behind Spamton—

“SPAMMY!!”

“[[DON’T]]—”

The knight’s blade came down hard on the disheveled Addison before Tenna could do anything to stop it. Tenna watched in horror as Spamton’s dual-toned glasses went dark and he fell to the ground, a horrible gash cleaved into his little puppet back. This didn’t feel real. This couldn’t be real. Everything felt like it was happening in slow motion. Tenna’s vision remained stuck on Spamton’s lifeless body in front of him. Even as the knight approached him, even as the heroic trio stepped in to protect him, Tenna’s perception had narrowed to just him and just Spamton.

“…Spammy…?” Tenna got up and tried to take a step towards Spamton—

Only to narrowly dodge a stray attack from the knight.

Tenna gasped, quickly coming back down to reality. Powerful attacks were flying everywhere as the three heroes engaged the knight in battle. Tenna could feel the fans in his head whirling as he began to hyperventilate. This was all his fault. This was all happening because of him. They were all going to die now because of him—because he took the knight’s deal. He had to do something. He had to help somehow. He had to—

Another attack landed on the ground in front of Spamton’s body, just barely missing the puppet’s head.

Tenna’s legs moved on their own. He darted forward, dodging oncoming attacks as he grabbed his little mailman. He clutched Spamton to his chest as he dove for cover behind a snow mound. Tenna curled up around Spamton as snow erupted from behind them. A few more attacks were hurled their way before finally subsiding. Tenna gulped down a few desperate breaths before sitting up just enough to check out the battle. The knight’s attention was back on the trio, that was good…

Wait, no, that was terrible!

Tenna looked frantically between the battle and the mailman in his arms. He checked Spamton, the mailman’s condition nearly bringing him to tears. Spamton looked terrible. If it hadn’t been for the mailman’s magic, Tenna was quite certain he wouldn’t have recognized him. This wasn’t how Spamton was supposed to look. Spamton had been larger than life—a Big Shot! Now he was a crumpled heap in Tenna’s arms, and his health… Tenna had never seen anything so far in the red. Why? Why did Spamton push him out of the way!? Tenna was terrible under this kind of pressure! Spamton knew that! Spamton was the one that knew how to keep it together between the two of them! The only thing Tenna had for this kind of scenario were his—

“TV Dinners!” Tenna hurriedly rifled through his inventory for one, pressing it to Spamton, “It’s going to be okay, Spammy, it’s all going to be okay, this’ll heal you right up—”

The TV Dinner wasn’t working.

The TV Dinner wasn’t working!

The TV Dinner wasn’t working!!

“No, no, no no no no no no—”

What was he going to do? There wasn’t anything he could do! If he couldn’t at least save Spamton then what was he even good for—

Tenna heard the snap of Kris’ fingers.

“Tenna!” Susie called out.

As if it had been scripted, Tenna threw TV Dinners their way, healing the party up. He saw Kris smile at him and for a moment Tenna felt like he could be proud of himself. That’s right, he could still help them. He wasn’t useless. He wasn’t outdated. He wasn’t afraid—

The knight was looking at him.

The knight was suddenly in front of him—

“MAMMA MIA!!” Tenna cried out as he was just barely able to roll out of the way of their blade, Spamton held tightly in his arms.

Tenna jumped to his feet and started running as the knight tried to chase him down. Tenna ducked, dipped, dove and dodged as the knight swung attack after attack at him. Tenna had done a lot of Physical Challenges in his time, but this was by far the hardest one. Tenna knew if any of their attacks landed it would be curtains for him. To make matters worse, it felt like his stamina was running out while the knight’s only seemed to grow. He couldn’t keep this up. He couldn’t! He couldn’t—

Tenna looked down at Spamton.

He had to.

Swallowing his fear, Tenna dodged the next attack and turned to face the knight. Keeping Spamton cradled close to him in one arm, he brought the other one up and summoned his All-Star Cast. That seemed to catch the knight off guard as the first two stars hit them square in the… face? Helmet? Head. It wasn’t much, but it gave Tenna just enough time to hide behind another snow mound before the knight could notice. He took a deep breath, gently setting Spamton down before popping up again just as the knight had finished blocking the last of his attack. He looked over at Susie, an unspoken plan forming between the two as she readied her next attack.

Tenna clapped his hands in a Smash Cut as Susie used Rude Buster, sending static the knight’s way just as they tried to dodge and causing them to take the brunt of both attacks. The knight turned their attention back to Susie and the others. Tenna wanted to jump in and get the knight’s ire back on him, but something about the look Kris gave him stopped him in his tracks. He watched as Kris dodged the knight’s next attack effortlessly—like they knew what each move would be before it had even happened. The other two had managed to dodge a little less effortlessly—though both managed to keep standing. Kris looked over at Tenna, and it was as if Tenna knew what Kris was about to do. He quickly grabbed Spamton and readied the TV Dinners.

Kris snapped their fingers.

He heard Susie call his name.

Tenna threw the TV Dinners at the trio and took off running as the knight started to chase him again. Duck, dip, dive, dodge—Tenna’s muscle memory guided him through the next series of attacks sent his way. Dodge, jump, duck, dive, jump, dodge—now! Tenna turned around and brought his arm up as if to summon his All-Star Cast again. The knight was ready this time and moved to block—only for Tenna to bring his hand back down and shoot them with a gun. Tenna quickly dove behind a snow mound, setting Spamton down gently. He popped back up as quick as he could, clapping his hands in sync with Susie’s Rude Buster. The knight once again failed to block either attack. Tenna almost began to cheer—but suddenly the knight was in front of him.

Tenna rolled out of the way of their slash, grabbing Spamton as he did so. The knight began to teleport between him and the three heroes, letting out a barrage of attacks. How any of them were managing to keep up with it, Tenna didn’t know. His heart was racing and he was starting to feel fuzzy-headed as he kept dodging. It was all too much, but just as Tenna thought he was about to drop the knight’s attack stopped. Susie looked like she was growing pale, but she mustered up the strength to attack the knight anyways. Tenna was certain she’d said something, but he could barely hear anything over the sound of his fans working overtime.

The knight’s hands began to glow.

Kris looked at Tenna.

As if he’d been commanded, Tenna sent a TV Dinner their way and prepared himself for the next attack.

The knight flew up and called forth a barrage of stars to them. Tenna yelped as he quickly turned around, just barely able to dodge out of the way in time as several stars started flying towards him. Tenna’s close calls got even closer as the stars began to form a tighter and tighter pattern. He held his breath as he ducked out of the way of a line of stars, now forming a spiral pattern. He could hear the whirl of his own mechanical heartbeat as he followed Kris and the others in sticking as close as possible to the center of spiral, Spamton clutched tightly to his chest. He hoped this would be over soon. Please let this be over soon—

The knight let out a roar and Tenna was just barely able to roll out of the way as they let the stars they’d accumulated loose. Tenna cried out as one of the stars clipped his antenna, moving faster and holding Spamton closer. The stars exploded, sending their fragments every which way. He had to keep it together. He had to keep it together. He had to—

He heard the knight teleport behind him.

He was just barely able to turn around in time to see their blade raised and ready to cleave him in two—

An axe met the blade and in a flash of purple Susie was suddenly right there protecting him. He watched in awe as she was able to meet the knight’s strength. He took a step back to join Kris and Ralsei, ready with another TV Dinner as he watched the struggle unfold, until finally—

CRACK!

Susie’s axe cut into the knight’s blade and a piece of it came flying off.

Had… had they actually done it? Had they beaten the knight?

Tenna couldn’t believe it, they’d done it, they’d won!

Susie laughed, “Not so tough NOW, are you!?”

Tenna was ready to laugh with her, until—

There was a sickening crunch as Susie went down. What had happened? What had just happened!?

“Susie!!!” Tenna heard Ralsei cry, “H…how could you…”

With another crunch, Ralsei went down. A wave of panic overtook Tenna. Where had that attack come from!? Who had that attack come from!? Tenna didn’t know. Tenna didn’t know!! The only thing Tenna knew was that he was next! He was next and he had no way to defend himself from something like this!! What was he going to do!? What was he—

Tenna took one last look at Spamton.

As quickly as he could, Tenna curled himself around the little mailman, shielding him from the blow.

Chapter Text

“…N…A…”

What was that?

“T…N…A…”

Was… was someone calling out to him?

“…A…N…T…”

Ant… the only person who’d ever called him by that name was—

“Ant!” Spamton’s voice rang out through his head.

“Spammy!!!” Tenna jolted awake, flailing and nearly falling off the couch in front of the mailman.

“Whoa there, superstar, take it easy!” Tenna heard the shuffle of footsteps quickly approaching him, “You okay there, Ant?”

Tenna panted as he tried to take in his surroundings. It felt like his entire being was thrumming with the kind of energy one would only get when faced with certain death. He looked around at the room, taking in the mirror and posters. He was… he was in Spamton’s dressing room. He felt static build in his head as he tried to recall what he’d been doing here. He figured he must have fallen asleep, but he couldn’t for the life of him remember what he’d been doing before that. He’d been… he’d been… he’d been—

“Ant…?” Spamton’s hand touched his.

Tenna looked at Spamton, a rush of confusing emotions overwhelming him and driving him to scoop the other man into his arms.

“Whoa—hey—!” Spamton cried out in shock before letting out a sigh, bringing his arms up to hug Tenna back, “…bad dream?”

Tenna didn’t know, but he nodded anyways, holding Spamton impossibly close. His arms trembled, his breath was uneven, and every component in Tenna’s being told him to keep the mailman in his arms and never let him go. It was as if he would lose Spamton forever if he ever did. Some part of Tenna told him that he was being ridiculous—that he was giving away far too much for the game he had been playing with the mailman, but in that moment Tenna didn’t care. He hadn’t the faintest idea what it was that he’d dreamt, but it felt as though whatever it was had opened his eyes.

“Must’ve been a really bad one…” Spamton shifted in his arms as he reached up, causing Tenna to whine, “I’m still here, I’m still here, jeez, I’m just…”  

Tenna felt Spamton gently begin to pet his antenna, nearly melting into the floor right then and there. Spamton would do that whenever Tenna was distressed and he realized he’d never once thanked the smaller man for it. Part of him tried to argue that that couldn’t be right—surely he would have said something! Yet, he couldn’t recall a single time he’d done so. There was so much he’d held in, now that he thought about it. So much that he wanted to tell his little mailman yet withheld. For what purpose? Because honesty was bad for business? Because he’d wanted to get one over on the new technology? Because he’d wanted to impress the little mailman? Because he didn’t want to risk rejection?? Life was so short, why would he ever wait to tell the love of his life—

Oh…

Oh…

That was right…

He never got to tell Spamton—

“I-I love you.” Tenna blurted out.

Spamton froze in his arms, “…what…?”

“I love you, Spammy.” Tenna repeated with more confidence.

“A-Ant—”

Tenna set the stunned mailman down on the couch and knelt before him, taking both of Spamton’s hands into his own.

“And I-I’m not saying that to get you to agree to any contract or to say that you love TV or—or anything else!!” Tenna quickly followed, giving Spamton’s hands a gentle squeeze, “I’m saying it because I mean it. I really, truly mean it. I love you so much, Spammy, and I never want another day to go by where you don’t know that.”

“Ant…I—”

A knock at the door interrupted the two, drawing the pair’s attention. He looked between Spamton and the door, a whine escaping him at the thought of moving away from his mailman. Still, he knew he’d need to answer, so he gave the hands clasped in his own a quick kiss before releasing them to go get the door.

“Tenna, luv, I got that contract you wanted—!!!”

“Ramb!” Tenna felt compelled to pull the power-strip into a tight embrace, words falling from his mouth before he could understand what he was even saying, “Oh, Ramb, it’s so good to see you! You do so much for me and it’s time I start paying that off! So, from here on out, you’re getting a raise and more vacation days and—”

Ramb brought his hand up to feel Tenna’s screen, “You feeling alright there, luv? You’re not acting like yourself.”

“I’m feeling marvelous Ramb, simply marvelous!” Tenna laughed as he set Ramb down.

Ramb looked at Tenna for a long while, then he looked over Tenna’s shoulder—likely at Spamton—before shrugging, “If you say so, luv…I was just stopping by to deliver this, so I think I’d best be getting back to work now.”

Tenna felt his wires freeze as Ramb handed him the aforementioned “contract” before he hurriedly walked out the door. That’s right, he’d… he’d concocted this plan to get access to Spamton’s secret. Tenna’s heart sank as he looked at the names signed on the paper before him… and at the one signature missing from the entire thing. Had… had he really been willing to go to such lengths just for the chance to be a Big Shot? Had he really spent the next month trying to convince Spamton to sign this?

“Ant, are you okay?” Tenna startled at the sound of Spamton’s voice, unsure of when the other man had gotten next to him, “Ant…is—is that—?”

“A marriage license…” Tenna looked down shamefully, glooby tears welling up on his screen as he began to shrink, “I…I was going to convince you to sign this…make up something about tax purposes…but really, I…I wanted to use this to get to your secret…I…I’m so sorry, Spammy…I—”

Spamton used his hand to tilt Tenna’s screen up to face him, his thumb gently wiping the tears away, an understanding smile on the mailman’s face, “Ant—”

“I-I don’t want this to be a ploy!!” Tenna set the paper down and cupped Spamton’s face, “I don’t care about getting something out of this or what your secret is anymore! I love you, Spammy, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you! A-And I want to do it right! I don’t want to push you into it this time!! My name’s already on it, so you can just take it and whenever you want to—no, if you ever want to, you can sign it and—mmf!!!”

Spamton’s lips met his and Tenna nearly sobbed into the kiss. His heart ached with longing. Oh, how Tenna had missed this. He pulled Spamton close, loving the way the mailman shuddered as he deepened their kiss. Everything felt so right when he was kissing Spamton, like nothing else in the world mattered. All of his worries melted away. Everything would be alright, he thought. All he needed was this. All he needed was Spamton.

But, then Spamton pulled back.

Spamton’s eyes held such a deep sadness, his lips curled in a bittersweet smile as he said, “I think it’s time for you to wake up, Ant.”

Tenna’s heart clenched at that despite his own confusion.

“What are you talking about—”

“—Spammy?” Tenna shot up, looking around at everyone in confusion.

“Tenna!” Susie cried as she pulled him into a hug, “You’re okay! I can’t believe that worked!”

“Susie—what—where—” Tenna instinctively returned the hug, pulling back a little bit to look at her as the memories of what had happened came flooding back to him, “Are you alright!? Is everyone alright!? Is—”

“I’m okay, everyone’s okay—” Susie paused, the smile on her face dropping as she looked over at something, “well… almost everyone…”

Tenna followed her gaze—

“N-No…” Tenna gasped in horror, tears forming on his screen, “no…no no no no no no no—”

Spamton’s body was laid out on Prince Ralsei’s scarf, his glasses were dark, he wasn’t moving—he wasn’t moving—Spamton wasn’t moving—

Spamton was dead.

“We tried everything we could to bring him back, but…” Ralsei’s words sounded so distant to Tenna as he crawled over to where his beloved mailman lay.

He brought his shaking hands over to slowly scoop Spamton into his arms once again, ignoring the pain in his shoulders. He brushed hair out of the mailman’s face, a sob escaping him at what he saw. His eyes were so wide, so stricken with fear—with the sheer terror he’d felt in his final moments. Terror he’d faced to save Tenna. Tenna, who had spent years wishing him nothing but ill. Tenna, who had spent years thinking of all of the things he would do and say to Spamton if he ever saw the little mailman again. Tenna, who had spent years thinking of all of the ways he would get back at Spamton. Tenna, who had chosen to stoke the embers of malice towards the smaller man again and again and again, ensuring that they would never grow cold. Tenna had spent all of their years apart blaming Spamton for everything—had made a monstrous effigy in the shape of his beloved business partner to any and all who would listen. Had his and Spamton’s roles been reversed, Tenna was certain he would have sat by with popcorn in hand eager to watch Spamton’s comeuppance…

But Spamton hadn’t done that…

Spamton had pushed him out of the way…

And now…

“This is all my fault…” glooby tears fell onto Spamton as Tenna curled around him, “this is all my fault…I’m sorry…I’m so, so sorry…”

Tenna had spent years wishing that Spamton would disappear forever.

Now, he wished more than anything that his little mailman would come back.

“Can’t we just…I don’t know, take him to the Addisons or something?” Tenna heard Susie mutter.

“Unfortunately, it’s not that simple,” he heard Ralsei quietly reply, “Spamton isn’t from this Dark World, so when Kris closes the fountain with him like this…”

Tenna froze.

He… he was about to lose Spamton forever…

He… he couldn’t… he couldn’t let that happen… but how—

Tenna felt the port on the back of Spamton’s neck. That was right. Spamton had tried to explain its function to him once. It was something about Spamton’s name and serving staff using an old net and how he was able to use it to sell some sort of service to lightners that let them flood spiderwebs to deny them something? Tenna had never quite understood what Spamton had been talking about, but he’d always seemed a bit embarrassed whenever Tenna asked about it. He’d qualified every tale with the justification that he’d only ever used it to keep a roof over the heads of the other Addisons when they’d started popping into existence, espousing how he’d “gone legit” and intended to stay that way now that he was with Tenna.

Tenna looked at Spamton’s lifeless body.

Spamton wasn’t from his Dark World…

… But maybe…

“The—the game console…” Tenna muttered, looking up at Ralsei and then at everyone else, “please…if someone—anyone—could please get the cable from the game console—”

His gaze landed on the three fake Mike’s in the crowd.

“Please…” Tenna begged, “please…if you get it I can save him…please help me save him…”

The trio looked at him for a moment, then, with a nod of understanding, they took off.

Ralsei regarded him, uncertainty etched into the prince’s features, “Are…are you sure this is safe?”

No, Tenna knew that by connecting to Spamton in this way he could die.

“Of course I am!” Tenna gave the prince his award-winning smile before turning to Susie, “Now, if I could ask of you the biggest favor—”

“Go distract Kris,” Susie nodded, “on it, Tenna.”

Tenna smiled at Susie as she ran off—the best contestant he’d ever known.

“We found the cable, boss!” Cowboy Hat Mike came rushing over to him.

“Thank you, Mike,” Tenna smiled at the Zapper before looking at the RCA plug, “now… how do I—”

“I can help!” Elnina shouted from the crowd as she rushed towards him.

“Elnina…” Tenna felt as though his heart was ready to burst from him, “thank you…thank you…I should have treated you better…you and Lanino…you both did so much for me…I…I’m sorry…”

“…” Elnina looked at him as she plugged the RCA cable into his head, “…don’t apologize, just…do better when we all get to this Castle Town, okay?”

Tenna looked up at her with a watery smile, nodding before turning his attention back to Spamton.

“It’s going to be okay, Spammy, it’s all going to be okay…” Tenna whispered to his little mailman as he plugged the other end of the cable into Spamton’s neck—

Tenna felt his screen code out to the color bars the moment he was connected to Spamton.

It burned!

It burned!

Why did it burn!?

He wanted to beg someone—anyone to help him!

Then… suddenly… everything went dark.

Everything was so dark…

Chapter Text

Tenna felt the faint hint of buzzing in the back of his head as he slowly woke up. The first thing he registered was that he was standing on a familiar carpet for some reason. That… that couldn’t be right. He’d never fallen asleep standing up before and stayed standing up. In fact, now that Tenna thought about it, he hadn’t fallen asleep standing up at all. He’d been in the snow holding—

Everything came rushing back to him like a runaway train.

Tenna’s head snapped up, allowing him to see exactly where he was.

Oh…

Oh…

He… he must have died… and this…

… This must be a memory…

Tenna was back in the old conference room. On the couch next to him sat two red jackets, one with his signature TV pin and another, smaller one with the custom mail pin. At the end of the table where Tenna stood there were boxes of half-eaten takeout and two empty coffee mugs. Bottles were strewn about haphazardly throughout the table, guiding Tenna’s gaze up to where the single cigarette they’d shared lay forgotten in an ashtray. Then, at the far end, he saw them. Himself and Spamton as they had been all those years ago, sleeves rolled up, ties loose, laughing, happy…

His heart ached bittersweetly.

He knew where he was.

This was the last night he’d had with Spamton before the mailman had signed Tenna’s contract.

He remembered this night—well, most of this night. They’d both gotten quite drunk, scrambling to finalize the schedules for the coming season. Everyone else had turned in for the night, so it had just been them again, alone, bouncing dead-end ideas back and forth until they managed to strike gold. Tenna chuckled to himself. These days he would have been panicking if he didn’t have everything ready by the end of the day, but back when he’d had Spamton he’d loved nothing more. It had almost become a ritual to them at that point, the two of them staying to “burn the midnight oil” so to speak. It had just made things easier, in Tenna’s opinion. No one else shared Tenna’s passion quite like Spamton had, all of the others more eager to just get something done than to get it done right. That, and Spamton had just always had a way of keeping Tenna calm, even under the closest of deadlines.

He heard his past-self let out a laugh at one of Spamton’s jokes and couldn’t help the smile it brought to his own screen. Tenna then paused, curious. He walked over to where the pair were, Spamton sat on the table in front of Tenna’s counterpart. He put a hand in front of the two to test if either would react to his presence, letting out a sigh of relief upon finding that they didn’t. He then looked at the door. Part of him said to leave—that he didn’t belong here anymore. There wasn’t anything he could do anyways, so what would be the point of staying?

Then again, what would be the point of leaving?

He was dead after all.

Couldn’t he stay in this moment—even as a mere spectator?

Would that be bad?

Would that be weird?

… Did it even matter anymore?

Tenna let out a huff and looked over at the cigarette. He hadn’t smoked since Spamton left, but now that he was dead and facing down his end he found himself reaching for it once more. To his surprise—and relief—he was able to pluck it from where it lay. He held it between his lips as he pulled up a chair next to the shadow of his past life. He took a long drag from it before tilting his head away from the couple to blow out the smoke. Regardless of it being a memory, Tenna still didn’t want to be rude. He watched, cigarette in hand, as the last good night of his life played out before him.

“I’ve— I’ve got it, Ant!” Spamton took a moment to cackle at whatever idea he’d had floating around in his head, “How about this… we have one of them just run ads! Nothing but— nothing but ads! Whole channel dedicated to ads!”  

Tenna found himself laughing alongside his counterpart.

“We can’t have something that just runs ads, you maniac!!” Tenna let out between giggles.

“Sure we can, people love ads! Don’t act like you haven’t heard Toriel humming this one:” Spamton grinned as got up on the table and began to dance around, “Turn up the juice! Turn up the juice! Make sure you don’t get it on your sho—OESE!!!”

Spamton had misjudged his footing and slipped from the table.

Luckily, Tenna’s past-self was able to catch him just in time—practically falling out of his own chair in his scrambling to do so.

Tenna watched as the pair remained frozen there, a flush on both of their faces. Goodness, they really had been quite the pair, hadn’t they? They’d even managed to breathe in sync with one another. He watched their chests rise and fall in time as their faces grew closer and closer. He took another drag and averted his gaze for a moment when it looked as though the two were going to start kissing—despite knowing what actually came next. Despite having been the very person who’d held Spamton that night. Even in death, Tenna couldn’t bring himself to change.

“Well, well, well,” his past-self quickly put on a mask of composure, “it looks like you’ve fallen for me.”

Spamton blinked at him, the flush on his cheeks growing just a bit darker.

Then, Spamton burst out into laughter, “Ant that’s… that’s— wait, that’s it! We need more rom-coms on the schedule! Asgore loves rom-coms! Ant, you’re a genius!”

Tenna remembered how hard it had been to keep the flower from blooming at the end of his nose whenever Spamton tried to butter him up.

“What can I say, there’s a reason people love TV.” Past Tenna chuckled as he went along with Spamton’s ruse, gently setting the little mailman back on the table in front of him.

Tenna couldn’t help but smile as he watched his past-self freeze when his hand brushed over the back of Spamton’s neck.

“Uh… Ant? Hello? Paging Dr. Tennaville?” Spamton waved his hand in front of Tenna’s past-self, “What’s going on in that tube of yours, huh?”

Tenna watched himself fumbled over his words, trying to come up with something convincing before blurting out the truth.

“The—the port on your neck…you said it was how you established connections, right?”

“Oh— uh— y-yeah, but—” Spamton began to fumble himself, “I mean, certain connections— it’s— I mean, it’s not how I got connected with my benefactor— it’s there more for— more for…”

Spamton paused, taking a moment to process, before excitedly cupping his screen.

“Wait, you— you remembered! You remembered that it’s for connections!!!” Spamton’s face lit up in the biggest grin Tenna had seen, “Ant, this is— you’re actually starting to pick up what I’m teaching! I can’t believe it!! This is so exciting!! Soon I’ll be able to teach you about dial-up and all of the protocols and maybe I’ll even be able to show you the Usenet groups where I— wait… wait, shit, right, I’m banned from all of the good servers… b-but I that doesn’t matter, I’ll just make a workaround! I—”

Tenna felt guilt wiggling its way into his chest. Spamton had been so proud of him in that moment, he’d had no idea that Tenna hadn’t been listening to him. All he could think about back then was—

“What would happen if we were connected?”

Spamton stopped midsentence, the flush on his cheeks spreading to his entire face.

Tenna couldn’t help but laugh alongside his past counterpart.

Red always did look good on Spamton.

“W— W— W— W—” Spamton stuttered, “WHAT? WHAT? [[WHAT]]? WHAT? WHAT—”

 Tenna watched his past-self begin to stand and lean over Spamton, putting on an act of confidence that he could only convincingly sell to the smaller man while they were both drunk.

“If we were to use a connector cable to establish a connection,” Past Tenna gently tilted Spamton’s chin up, “what would happen?”

“TH-THAT— I— YOU—” Tenna had always found it so cute, the few times he’d ever actually been able to fluster the mighty Spamton G. Spamton, “WHAT ARE YOU— WHY ARE YOU EVEN ASKING???”

“Was just thinking,” Past Tenna’s usually hidden tail began to swish behind him, “like, what if that laptop got taken away before you could figure that Neo thing out, could I make you part of my Dark World if I connected you to me?”

“W-W-WELL YEAH, B-BUT THEN YOU’D HAVE TO STAY CONNECTED TO ME!” Spamton retorted.

Tenna’s counterpart chuckled, leaning his face closer to Spamton’s, “Sounds like heaven.”

“I-IT’D COME WITH RISKS!” Spamton began to lean back.

“Every good show does.” Past Tenna countered with a grin, leaning in to follow him.

“A D-DIRECT CONNECTION LIKE THAT WOULDN’T BE SECURE!” Spamton gasped as his back met the table, “ANYTHING THAT AFFECTS ME C-COULD AFFECT YOU TOO!”

Tenna’s past-self looked at Spamton with a lovestruck expression as he replied, “Worth it.”

Tenna watched as Spamton’s eyes grew impossibly wide.

“… Why… why would you go to all the trouble… ?”

“Because I’d get to keep you.” Past Tenna had said with such certainty.

Tenna watched in shock as tears began to gather in Spamton’s eyes.

He… he hadn’t noticed them back then…

Why would Spamton—

“You… you’d really do that for me… ?” Spamton’s voice wavered slightly, “… you really… want me here… ?”

“I do.” Tenna said at the same time as his counterpart.

Spamton kissed Tenna’s past-self with the fervor of a starving man. Tenna chuckled to himself, accepting their display as his cue to finally leave and give the lovebirds their privacy. He allowed himself to take one last drag of the cigarette before he got up and put it back to rest in the ashtray from where he’d disturbed it. He adjusted his jacket and tie, doing his best to ensure that he was at least presentable. He took in a deep breath and made his way to the door, trying his best to ready himself to face whatever lie beyond. He told himself that he could do this. He told himself that he could face his end with his screen held high. He told himself—

His hand touched to doorknob and he froze.

Glooby tears sprung onto his screen…

He… he didn’t want to leave…

… Yet he knew he had to…

… He cast one last glance to memory of what he’d had with Spamton.

“…I love you, Spammy,” Tenna confessed quietly, a bittersweet smile curling on his screen through the tears, “I wish…I wish I would have told you that when I had the chance…”

Tenna turned the doorknob and—

Where…

Where did everything go…?

It was dark. It was so dark. It was as if in an instant everything had disappeared around him, leaving him here in this bleak darkness. Alone. Tenna began to panic. This… this couldn’t be right, could it? This… this had to be just a transitory area! Yes, that had to be it, just a place in between. Surely this wouldn’t be where he would spend eternity… right? Here, alone, in darkness. This couldn’t be right. This couldn’t be right. This couldn’t be—

RING.

Tenna froze.

A sound—a sign!

He tried to move to search for the source—

Only to find that he couldn’t move of his own accord. Instead, he felt himself being moved by some other force, turning him in the direction of the ringing rotary phone. Tenna felt the beating heart of his circuits begin to work overtime. This wasn’t right. None of this was right. Why couldn’t he move? How had he been moved? He didn’t want to pick up the phone. Why was he reaching out to pick up the phone—

What—

What were these—

What were these strings!?

Tenna didn’t have much more time to think about that as the phone was plucked from the receiver.

A message rang out in Tenna’s head, piercing through it like a sword strike.

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

Finally able to move of his own accord again, Tenna couldn’t help but cry out as the message rang out over and over, falling to his knees as he gripped at his head.

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“S-STOP!!!”

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“STOP!!!”

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“HELP!!!”

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“SOMEONE!!!”

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“ANYONE!!!!!”

THE LORD OF SCREENS CLEAVED RED BY BLADE.

“PLEASE—”

Suddenly everything was quiet…

“…w…what…?”

“INTERESTING.”

“Who…?”

Tenna to look up from where he’d fallen, trying to find the source of the mysterious voice, only to see—

“Spammy!”

Tenna stumbled forwards on unsteady footing as he practically ran to where Spamton lay. Spamton looked like a discarded puppet, the same strings attached to Tenna painfully tangled around him. Tenna nearly growled, pulling Spamton into his arms as he began to rip at the wires that were constricted around the smaller man. He didn’t know what this was, but regardless, he refused to let Spamton suffer like this. He would save his little mailman from whatever this hell was…

The wires began to tug Spamton away from Tenna.

“NO!” Tenna cried as he held onto Spamton, fighting furiously against his own wires as they began to tug, “NO NO NO NO NO!!! YOU CAN’T HAVE HIM!!!”

The wires on Tenna began to pull harder, growing painful.

“PLEASE!” Tenna pleaded, clutching Spamton to him desperately, “PLEASE, JUST—WHATEVER THIS IS TAKE ME INSTEAD!!! YOU CAN HAVE ME JUST DON’T TAKE HIM!!!”

The wires didn’t falter, still pulling and pulling.

“PLEASE—PLEASE—” Tenna scrambled for something, anything, “WHY? WHY HIM??? IS IT—DO YOU HAVE TO??? IF—IF YOU HAVE TO TAKE HIM, THEN—THEN—”

Tenna felt his arms begin to give out.

 “THEN TAKE US BOTH!!!”

The wires stopped, allowing Tenna a moment to breathe.

“Please…” Tenna looked down at Spamton, “if you have to…if you have to take him…please let me go with…if I can’t save him, then…let me stay with him…please…”

For a moment everything was frozen.

Nothing moved, nothing gave any kind of sign.

Tenna prepared for the worst—

Only for some of the wires to start moving again—the ones Tenna had ripped from Spamton. They moved around the pair and Tenna only held Spamton tighter in response. Tenna watched the wires as they grew closer and closer and closer. He wouldn’t let them take Spamton from him. Whatever this place was, he wouldn’t let Spamton be here alone. He wouldn’t let these wires separate them. He—

He felt as the wires began to coil around them both…

… As if they were…

… Binding them…?

“… A… n… t… ?” Tenna heard Spamton croak out.

“S-Spammy—I-I…”

Tenna looked around at the wires before looking down at Spamton, taking in how the smaller man’s glasses displayed only static…

“…”

Taking a deep breath, Tenna gave Spamton a gentle squeeze.

“…I’m here, Spammy…I’m right here…”

He held Spamton close to him as everything fell into darkness again.

Chapter Text

Tenna felt disoriented as he began to power on again. What happened? Where was he? He tried to recall anything about the events that had occurred before he’d been powered off—about where he could have been and what he could have done. He tried. He tried. He tried… but… he couldn’t remember. He couldn’t remember! He couldn’t remember… which meant… oh… oh… oh no. Confusion gave way to sheer terror. He’d been… he must have been unplugged again. That meant that he’d… he’d be waking up in some thrift store again. That was what being unplugged had always meant. He’d been through this cycle many, many times before. He was familiar with how this went. Unwatched, unloved, unplugged, then left unwanted at the doorstep of an unfamiliar shop. Passed along as if he’d never meant anything to the people he’d once thought his family. Left to rot in the discount section until some kind Lightner took pity on him. Except, Tenna knew that wouldn’t happen this time. He recalled how he’d been on the brink of being thrown out entirely when Asgore had saved him. However, Asgore wasn’t here anymore, and Tenna had—Tenna had—Tenna had—

Tenna had tried to hand Toriel over to the knight.

He… supposed he’d earned his abandonment this time. Well and truly deserved it this time. As the memories began to come back to him, he recalled just how awful he’d been to everyone. He recalled how he’d broken his end of the deal he’d made with Kris. He recalled how terribly he’d treated poor Kris and their friends. He recalled how quick he’d been to sell out poor Toriel on the promise that he’d never be discarded again. He recalled how badly he’d treated everyone under his employ—how he’d desperately tried to use their contracts as a bludgeon to crush any and all dissent amongst their ranks. He wouldn’t have blamed any of them if they’d decided they wanted nothing to do with him after how he'd acted. It was what he’d deserved, after all. He deserved to rot alone, left lost and broken in the snow, forgotten about…

Except… that wasn’t what had happened…

That’s right… he’d been saved. He wasn’t in a thrift shop… they’d… they’d placed him in a… in a bedroom? Right… they’d… they’d taken him to a bedroom in a castle… a castle? He… how had he ended up here? He… he remembered… he remembered he was about to face certain death. Right… the knight was going to kill him. Someone had killed him. Yet… Susie and everyone had put him back together. They’d done everything they could to bring him back. They… they all still believed in him. Despite everything, they all still cared about him. They all still tried to save him. They all still tried to help him save—

“Spammy—!!!”

Panic gripped Tenna. Spamton had been dead. Spamton had died trying to save him. His Spammy. His little mailman. Tenna couldn’t—Tenna couldn’t have just let that happen, could he? He couldn’t have just let his spammy little savior die, could he?? No… no… he couldn’t have… he wouldn’t have! He… he’d never… he’d… no… no… no no no no no no no no no no no—

Tenna froze.

He felt something in his arms…

He…

He looked down.

There, asleep in his arms, was—

“S-Spammy…”

Tenna practically cried in relief. Spamton was here. Spamton was alive. He didn’t even need to check Spamton to know that he was alive, he could feel it. He could… feel it? That… that was right. He’d established a connection with Spamton. He’d… he’d saved Spamton. That must have been why he could feel that Spamton was alive. That must have been why he could feel wires around them both. It… it had to just be the cables connecting them. Right… the cables. Tenna brought his hand up to the back of Spamton’s neck, where he felt—

… Nothing???

That…

That couldn’t be right…

There couldn’t just be nothing there…

Tenna could still feel them…

The wires…

The wires on him…

The wires connecting him to Spamton…

The wires…

The wires—the wires—the wires—the wires—the wires—the wires—the wires—

Tenna felt his circuits run cold as everything came rushing back to him like a freight train. He’d connected to Spamton. He’d connected to Spamton while Spamton was dead. He’d died right alongside Spamton. He’d… he’d ended up somewhere… somewhere dark. Darker than dark. He’d found a phone, answered it, heard… something… he thinks it was a voice… then he’d heard another voice… then… then he’d found Spamton… and he… he’d…

He must have messed something up.

That was the only thing that made sense to Tenna. Somehow, he’d done something wrong. That must have been how Spamton had ended up with all of those strings on him. That… that must have been a fate meant for Tenna—a punishment for all of Tenna’s transgressions. A punishment that was then transferred onto poor Spamton. A punishment that had followed them beyond the graves they’d both escaped. This… this was all Tenna’s fault. This had to be. Which meant that… that once Spamton woke up… he would… he would… he would…

Spamton would hate Tenna.

Tenna could feel his mechanical heart begin to break at the very thought of it. He didn’t want Spamton to hate him! He’d just gotten his little mailman back! He couldn’t… he couldn’t just lose Spamton again, could he!? He… he didn’t want to lose Spamton again. He’d only been trying to help… he’d only wanted to help. He… he didn’t know. He didn’t know that he’d be dragging Spamton into whatever this was. He didn’t know that he would be dragging Spamton down with him like this. He’d been trying to save Spamton. He’d been… He’d been…

He’d been trying to save Spamton…

Maybe… maybe if he explained himself, Spamton would forgive him? Yes… yes, Spamton would forgive him. After all, Spamton had saved Tenna, so clearly Spamton must still love him, right? Spamton… Spamton wouldn’t have done that if he hadn’t still loved Tenna, right?? Spamton still loved him… he had to still love him, right??? Spamton loved him and he loved Spamton, so all of this would be fine, right??? Everything would be fine, right??? He could just explain himself and Spamton would forgive him for his screw up and he would forgive Spamton for abandoning him all those years ago and they would make up and they’d never need to talk about the past again and they would hold hands and kiss and get remarried and skip happily into the sunset and Spamton would never ever ever leave him again and EVERYTHING WOULD BE JUST FINE, RIGHT—

He felt Spamton begin to shift in his arms.

Spamton was waking up…

Spamton was waking up!!!

Every alarm began to blare in Tenna’s head.

He was done for.

He should run away.

He should stay right here.

He should pretend he didn’t recognize Spamton.

He should tell Spamton how much he’d missed him.

He should demand that Spamton apologize.

He should cry and plead for Spamton’s forgiveness.

He should smother Spamton with a pillow.

He should protect Spamton.

He should scream at Spamton for leaving.

He should beg Spamton to stay.

He should ask Spamton why he’d saved him.

He should tell Spamton he loved him.

He should…

He should…

He should…

He wanted—

“… [Cathode]… ?”

Spamton’s eyes opened and began to look around the bedroom in confusion.

“… where… ?”

Tenna stayed frozen as Spamton sat up, confusion shifting to concern as he clearly felt the same tug Tenna did.

“… what… ?”

Spamton’s concern began to morph into fear as he tried to grasp at the invisible strings that bound them.

“… WHAT…”

Spamton’s eyes snapped over to Tenna’s screen.

“… WHAT. HAPPENED.”

Panic gripped Tenna as he sat up and, before he could even process what he was saying, words began to tumble out of his mouth.

“The—the—the kids! The kids they—they—I don’t know!? I don’t know!?” Tenna began to babble, “They did something!! One minute you were d-dead and then they stepped in to save you somehow and now you’re—bzzt—Coming to you live on a Friday night it’s—”

Tenna’s hands flew up to grip his boxy head.

That…

What was that???

Spamton was looking at him.

Spamton was looking at him!

“Ahaha…that…” Tenna swallowed hard, “I…I think a screw must be loose somewhere…the…the knight! Yes! The knight must have—bzzt—HIT A HOMERUN! WHAT AN UNBELIEVABLE GAME—”

Tenna could hear his internal fans whirling as he began to hyperventilate.

That…

That wasn’t just a one-off thing…

Tenna…

Tenna couldn’t lie…

Tenna couldn’t lie…

Tenna was done for…

Spamton would figure out the truth…

Spamton would figure out the truth because Tenna couldn’t lie…

He couldn’t lie…

He couldn’t lie…

He couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie— he couldn’t lie— he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t lie—he couldn’t escape—

Someone…

Someone was holding him…

Someone was holding him…?

He…

Had he shrunk…?

He’d shrunk…

He’d shrunk and someone was holding him…

Someone was gently petting his antenna…

Someone…

Someone…?

…

… Spamton…

… Spamton was…

“IT’S…” Spamton’s voice, though loud, was oddly gentle, “IT’S GOING TO BE OKAY…”

Tenna looked up at Spamton.

Spamton thought… Spamton thought he was only freaking out because he was glitching…

“IT’S [Difficulty Set To Hard] AT FIRST, BUT…”

Tenna’s mechanical heart jumped into his throat.

“IT… IT GETS [3 Easy Installments of $9.99]… I WOULD [Want To Know Your Sign? Click Here]…”

Tenna felt sick.

Spamton didn’t know.

Spamton didn’t know.

Spamton didn’t know that Tenna was lying. Spamton didn’t know that Tenna was freaking out because he couldn’t lie without glitching. Spamton didn’t know that this was all Tenna’s fault. Spamton didn’t know that Tenna was really panicking about the thought of not being able to lie to Spamton. Spamton thought Tenna was just struggling with the new adjustment… just like… just like Spamton had…

Just like Spamton had…

Tenna wanted to cry.

Tenna probably was crying.

He should push Spamton away. He should yell at Spamton for believing him. He should tell Spamton that he was comforting a selfish monster. He should tell Spamton to never ever trust him again. He should tell Spamton about every lie he’d ever told. He should tell Spamton the truth about everything. He should tell Spamton that he would never admit the truth even if a gun was held to his screen. He should yell at Spamton that there was a reason he’d ended up in second-hand stores so often. He should yell at Spamton for trusting his word when Spamton didn’t even truly, truly, know him! No one who truly knew him would have saved him! No one who truly knew him would ever try to comfort him! No one who truly knew him would hold him so close! No one who truly knew him would love him—

“IT’S OKAY… IT’LL BE OKAY… I’LL… I’LL GET RID OF THESE [Silly Strings]… I’LL [[Fixed]] THIS…”

Tenna didn’t deserve this.

Tenna didn’t deserve this kindness.

He should push Spamton away.

He should push Spamton away…

He should…

He should…

…

Hah…

Tenna didn’t want to let go…

Spamton…

He didn’t…

He didn’t want to lose Spamton…

He didn’t want to lose Spamton again…

…

Tenna clutched Spamton close to him as he began to sob, guilt heavy in his chest as Spamton held him closer in return.

Chapter Text

An awkward tension hung in the air as Tenna began to calm down. Spamton was quiet, leaving Tenna not certain what he should say or even what kind of rehearsed script he should pull from. It almost reminded Tenna of how he felt the morning after they’d first met. He didn’t know if that thought made him want to laugh or start crying again. He could, Spamton was still holding him—had been holding him the entire time without hesitation. Even as Tenna grew back to his usual size, Spamton still held onto him, only moving to adjust as needed. Spamton held him just like he had so many years ago—with Tenna’s head tucked safely against his chest. Spamton held him as if no time had passed between them at all. It made Tenna’s heart ache painfully. How long had it been since he’d been held like this? How long had it been since he’d had someone there to catch him when he fell? How long had it been? How long…

Tenna did his best to hold back more tears.

He’d missed Spamton…

He’d missed the way Spamton would hold him when he’d needed it. He’d missed the way Spamton made him feel as though everything would always be alright. He’d missed the way Spamton would pet his antenna to calm him down, or to help him to sleep, or just absentmindedly. He’d missed the way Spamton had been able to turn any situation in their favor. The way Spamton used to laugh—really laugh—whenever they were alone. The way Spamton used to laugh so hard at his own jokes he could barely tell them. The way Spamton would smile at him when they’d succeeded at something together—as they often did. Going out drinking with Spamton whenever they did manage to fail at something—because Spamton was right when he’d said they’d remember the fun more than the fuck-up. The way Spamton would always get crumbs on his cheeks whenever he ate a CD Bagel. How Spamton would always try to play off his embarrassment by putting more crumbs on his face—as if he’d planned to get crumbs on himself from the beginning just to make Tenna laugh. How Spamton could always get him to laugh. How Spamton always knew what to say. The way Spamton used to cling to him in his sleep. The way Spamton used to snore. How cute Spamton always looked in the morning. How Spamton had tried to use every sales tactic he’d known to buy himself five more minutes of rest each and every morning. How much Spamton would complain when his attempts didn’t work. The way Spamton would be the one to get him out of bed whenever he was on the verge of oversleeping. He’d missed getting ready for the day with Spamton. He’d missed hosting all of his shows with Spamton at his side. He’d missed having Spamton by his side.

He’d missed Spamton…

He’d missed Spamton so much…

And Spamton was here. Spamton was right here, in Tenna’s arms, just like he’d always dreamed. Spamton was here again after all of the years Tenna had spent grappling with his absence. After walking into the Green Room expecting to see him right there joking around with Ramb and the Shadow Guys only to see no one sitting at the bar. After walking past the music stage expecting to see the mizzles dancing while Spamton played the piano, only to remember that he’d been the one that had thrown the piano out after Spamton left. After helping Shuttah fix its camera because Spamton wasn’t there to do it anymore. After walking into Mike’s room as if he’d see Spamton there, sprucing the place up and talking to Mike about anything and everything, only for Mike to order Tenna out of the room—at least, until the real Mike let the three fake Mikes take over the space. After he’d spent night after night hoping that Spamton would sneak into Tenna’s old dressing room through their secret entrance once again, only to be left waiting. After opening the door to his home day in and day out expecting Spamton’s voice to be there to greet him, only to be met by silence. Finally, after everything, Spamton was here with him again, holding him just like once did…

… But everything still felt different…

…

… Tenna didn’t want to think about it right now.

So instead, Tenna moved out of Spamton’s arms and sat back, wiping at his screen.

“Ahaha…guess I got a little glooby there…” Tenna tried to play it off with a smile, “I don’t know what—bzzt—Get into the season with these easy to make recipes—”

Tenna almost began to panic again, but when he felt Spamton’s hand on the side of his head his anxieties grew quiet.

“IT’S [A-Okay], EVERY          GETS A LITTLE [Glooby] SOMETIMES.” Spamton ran his thumb along Tenna’s screen.

Spamton used to say the same thing to Tenna back when they’d been partners…

… It hurt.

“I…I don’t think so…” Tenna felt his smile drop, “I think I might be the only one, actually…”

“… WELL, THEN…” Spamton’s eyes darted back and forth for a moment before he blurted his next words out, “THEN THAT JUST MAKES YOU [Specil]—”

Tenna froze at that, seemingly prompting Spamton to freeze up as well.

Tenna… hadn’t been expecting that…

Once again, Tenna was left speechless, unable to do much more than stare into Spamton’s wide eyes where he saw a flash of… something… like a deep sadness…

Was that… heartbreak that he saw…?

“AH… THAT… PROBABLY DOESN’T [Press F1 For] HELP… [[Coming Straight From]] ME, AT LEAST…” Spamton offered a weak laugh, “I SHOULD [Get to Work] ON THESE [[Silly Strings]] 4NYWAYs… I JUST NEED TO [Find Your Match] MY [[Prescription Lenses]].”

That was right, Tenna remembered that Spamton always had trouble seeing without his glasses or contacts. Tenna looked around at the room they were in, finally taking it in for the first time. It was a nice enough suite with what appeared to be a bathroom attached. It was roomy too, with two couches, a coffee table, desk, his armoire, a nightstand next to the bed they were in that had a note and pair of dual-toned glasses on it—

Wait.

Tenna picked up the glasses and looked at them. Kris had been wearing a pair just like these during their time in the TV World. He’d also seen something like these again during what was most certainly a stress induced hallucination and surely nothing more than that. Tenna could also recall Spamton’s glasses seemingly holding the same dual-tones color before they went dark. Tenna wondered if it was simply the new fashion—something else that left Tenna feeling out of place and time. As he stared at the glasses, he noticed something on the temple near the hinge. It looked like there used to be a name scratched into it but it had been almost entirely scratched out. Though, if he felt over it, he was certain he could probably still feel out what the name on it had been—

Spamton’s hand shot out and quickly swiped the glasses from Tenna.

“[THX 4] FINDING THEM [[4]] M3.” Spamton said as he hurriedly put the glasses on, “NOW, WHAT [To Do List] ABOUT THE STRINGS…”

Tenna thought for a moment, “Maybe we could try cutting them—”

“NO!!!”

Tenna jumped at that.

“AHA— I ME4N— WE CAN”T JU5T [[Cut It Out]] AS WE [Please and Thank You]!” Spamton tried to quickly recover, “WITH THIS K1ND OF [[Magic]] WE NEED TO…”

Spamton’s voice faded out and he got that look that Tenna remembered so fondly—the look he got when something in his mind clicked.

“THAT’S IT!” Spamton looked at Tenna triumphantly, “I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE I CAN [Press Start]!”

“That’s great!” Tenna could feel himself relax a little, of course Spamton would know how to sort out this mess, “What do we—what are you going to do?”

“I CAN GO SEE [Stitches]— I MEAN [Patches]— [$!?!]!!!” Spamton grabbed his own face in frustration, “LOOK, I [Know a Guy], THEY’RE AN… ASSOCIATE OF AN ASSOCIATE, AND A [[High Lvl Boss]] MAGICIAN, THEY MIGHT BE ABLE TO [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]— [[F1]]—”

Tenna startled as Spamton’s face glitched out, panic settling over him as the glitching got worse.

Tenna tried to reach out to the smaller man, “Spam—Spamton???”

“AH— !!!” Spamton’s glitching stopped in an instant as he flinched away from Tenna’s hand.

Tenna pulled his hand back as if he’d been burned and watched as Spamton’s eyes flickered between Tenna’s hand and his screen.

“AH… AHA… HA…” recognition began flood back into Spamton’s eyes, “JUST A MINOR [Technical Difficulties], [[Sorry For The Inconvenience]]…”

“Are…” Tenna wanted to reach out again, but stopped himself, “are you okay…?”

“I”M [Right on the Money]— [Right Now for a Limited Time Only]— [Right as Rain]— I AM [Right as Rain]!” Spamton put on a salesman-like smile as he lied right to Tenna’s face.

Tenna was just about to try to call him out on it when Spamton began to move towards the edge of the bed, causing the strings to shift with him.

“Spamton—” Tenna tried.

“I’M [[All Good Things Must]], [Cathode],” Spamton kept going and Tenna wondered how he could be so oblivious, “I [Cross My Heart and Hope to]— [[Promise]].”

Tenna almost wanted to scream at him—to remind him of the strings!

Spamton had to feel it too, right!?

There was no way Spamton didn’t feel it!!

Did Spamton just not care!?

Was Spamton doing this to hurt him—

Wait…

Hurt…

Spamton was…

Spamton was still in pain…

He… he was trying to hide it… but…

Tenna could see it when he actually took a moment to look at Spamton, all those small tells…

Even if he looked healed…

Spamton was clearly still in pain from—

That’s why he didn’t notice the strings getting—

“BESIDES, I HAVE [Feel Like You’re Working from 12 to 12?] TO DO!” Spamton declared as he jumped off the bed, doing his best to mask how he’d winced by walking it off, “SO I’LL JUST GO [[All By Myself]] AND SEE IF—”

“Wait!!!”

“HRK—!”

Spamton fell backwards and Tenna nearly toppled off the bed, the strings between them taut.

“The…” Tenna tried to get his bearings again, “the strings…”

“… RIGHT… [Apology Card]…” Spamton huffed as he scooted closer to Tenna before getting up, “… LOOKS LIKE WE’RE A [Double Feature] FOR NOW… WOULD YOU MIND [Blow This Popsicle Stand] WITH ME?”

“Oh, uh… sure, but…” Tenna looked back at the nightstand, “shouldn’t we read this note first?”

Spamton walked towards Tenna, “NOTE? NOTE?? WHAT [Notary Republic]???”

“This one,” Tenna picked it up and began to look it over, “it’s from…Prince Ralsei! It looks like he’s welcoming us to Castle Town and it says here he patched our clothes up for us—aw, how sweet!”

“OH GREAT, A [Welcome Basket] [[Instruction Manual]] FROM [[FluffyBoy]].” Tenna could almost swear Spamton was about to roll his eyes but he appeared to stop himself, “… I MEAN… THAT’S VERY NICE AND THOUGHTFUL OF HIM, BUT WE [Have a Job To Do], SO—”

“Oh hey! It says here that the bathroom should be safe for both of us to use!” Tenna grinned, watching as Spamton’s eyes flicked over to the bathroom door before quickly moving back to Tenna, “Looks like Queen was able to advise Prince Ralsei on it after she patched us both up—”

“WHAT???”

Tenna practically jumped, looking between Spamton and the note—

“She—she said it was “Part One” of her “Apology For Evicting You”—” that gave Tenna pause, claws and fangs beginning to appear in equal measure, “She what???”

It was Spamton’s turn to jump as he started to scramble for something to say.

“OH— THAT— THAT WAS— THAT HAPPENED [A Long Time Ago], BESIDES, I HARDLY NOTICED IT— IT WASN’T A PROBLEM— I CONSIDER IT [All Debts Paid In Full]—” Spamton was lying—Tenna didn’t know how he knew that, but he knew Spamton was lying to him again, “BESIDES, SHE [[Save File]]D US— SHE’S NOT— SHE PROBABLY DIDN’T EVEN LOOK AT MY PREVIOUS— I MEAN SHE’S— SHE’S— SHE’S CLEARLY [[I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry]], SO YOU DON’T NEED TO [Make a Mountain Out of a Mole Hill]!!! I WASN’T EVEN [Think On It] GETTING [[Eviction Notice]]! I WAS— I WAS JUST— I WAS WORRIED SHE PUT [Tea and Cookies] RIDE IN THE [Why is it called a restroom???]—”

Tenna stood up.

“WAIT— WAIT— WAIT—” Spamton moved in front of Tenna and put his arms out as if to block the taller man, “SHE’S A [Friend Request Accepted] OF KRIS— EVERYONE HERE IS! YOU CAN’T— I CAN’T LET YOU—”

Tenna froze.

“DON’T…”

Spamton looked up at him, expression pleading.

“… please…”

Tenna could feel himself shrinking as he began to deflate. He… Spamton was right. Tenna didn’t know what he’d been thinking. He couldn’t just go and fight everyone who’d ever done Spamton wrong—he didn’t have the right to. Not after what he’d done, at least. Tenna began to shrink further as he buried his screen in his hands. It had been so easy for him to slip back into that role—the role where he had been Spamton’s and Spamton had been his. He must look really stupid. Spamton must hate him—

“HEY,” Spamton began to pet his antenna again as he held Tenna in his hand, “LOOK, I APPRECIATE THE [Sentimental Gesture], BUT THIS IS A [[Nonviolence]] ZONE, CAN’T BELIEVE [[FluffyBoy]] DIDN’T PUT THAT IN THE [Fine Print]. HE’D BE [Liable For Damages] YOU KNOW?”

Tenna couldn’t help the weak chuckle that escaped him at that.

“I’M SERIOUS,” Spamton cracked a genuine grin, obviously trying to hold in his own laughter, “YOU CAN’T JUST [Are You New in Town?] PEOPLE WITHOUT EXPLAINING [Terms and Conditions] FIRST! THAT’S A [Thinking About Filing a Lawsuit?] WAITING TO HAPPEN!”

Tenna began to cackle as he wiped the glooby tears from his screen.

“YOU KNOW, THE KID’S REALLY GONNA NEED A [Lawyers Near You] SOMETIME SOON IF THIS IS HOW HE [Want To Run The Town?],” Spamton gently nudged the side of Tenna’s screen, “HE DIDN’T PUT ANY [Rules of the Road] IN THE [Notarized Document], DID HE? MY LITTLE RANT WOULD LOOK PRETTY [Are You Stupid Quiz] IF HE DID AND IT WAS JUST FURTHER DOWN.”

Tenna snorted a laugh, “No, just something about a Banner visiting us after they’re done with work.”

Spamton went rigid, “AH… HA…”

“Spam—”

Spamton quickly put Tenna on his shoulder, “WE SHOULD [Someone Get Me Out of Here]—”

Before Tenna could say anything, Spamton all but ran for the door, throwing it open—

… Only to see one of the blue Addisons with their hand raised as if to knock.

Chapter Text

“B— BA— BAN— [Prodigy Advertisement]—” Spamton appeared to struggle to say something to the darkner before them, “[Wait There’s More!]— I C4N [Looking For Answers?] [A Little Bit of Everything] JUST—”

All of Tenna’s internal sensors were alight as he looked up at the blue Addison from his perch on Spamton’s shoulder. He could hear Spamton’s breathing pick up as he began to back away from the door. The blue Addison took the opportunity to step into the room, closing the door behind them before they drew closer to Tenna and Spamton. His mind began to race. What should he do? What could he do?? Spamton had told him that violence was off the table, so that meant they couldn’t fight their way out of—out of this! Whatever this was!! Not that Tenna even wanted to fight the blue Addison, they were one of Spamton’s siblings after all! Estranged as they may be—or, at least, might have been—Tenna didn’t want to hurt Spamton’s family! But Tenna also didn’t want to sit idly by if they tried to hurt Spamton—

Oh…

Oh no…

They could hurt Spamton…

They could fight Spamton…

Tenna didn’t want to see another family fight…

Tenna didn’t want to see another family fall apart…

Tenna didn’t want—

A flash of motion snapped Tenna out of his thoughts and he quickly braced himself for an attack as all at once the blue Addison—

“I”M SOR— !!”

—dropped to their knees and pulled Spamton into a hug.

Spamton stood just as frozen as Tenna felt in that moment, unable to do little more than watch as the blue Addison’s shoulders began to shake, the sound of stifled sniffling the only noise in the room for a moment.

“… BANNER?” Spamton sounded confused.

“You’re the biggest asshole in the universe, you know that!?” Banner cried.

“…” Spamton maneuvered his arms to hug Banner back without disturbing Tenna, “… [Based on a Technicality] THE PLANET [[Uranus]] IS [31,763 Miles in Diameter]—”

“Asshole …” Banner let out a teary laugh.

“YE4H…” Spamton let out a sad chuckle of his own, “… I THOUGHT [[U]] H8ED ME…”

Banner shook their head frantically, “No! No — I — I was mad — Click was acting like — and then you were acting like — and I — I —”

Banner choked out a sob.

“I never should have left — I never should have left! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!!” Banner pulled Spamton closer, “I knew better! Better than anyone! I knew — I knew — I tried to find you — I tried — I tried to figure out where you moved to — and I followed where people said you’d been — and I tried the shop you set up in the trash zone but it was always locked — it was always locked! And then the Lightners came and I just — everyone just — and then we thought you were dead! And then you showed up here and you’d actually been alive the whole time but now you were actually dead!!! And I never told you that I was sorry! You died never knowing I was sorry! That I am sorry! I’m so, so sorry!!! I tried — I tried — I really tried — I swear, Spam, I —”

“I KNOW, BB… I KNOW…” Spamton tried to comfort Banner by gently rubbing their back, “IT’S OKAY…”

“… why didn’t you reach out?” Banner took a shallow breath, “… were you … avoiding me … ?”

“…” Spamton nodded.

Banner’s voice shook, “… why … ?

“… I…” Spamton’s voice wavered for just a moment, “… I DON’T KNOW…”

It was a lie. Tenna could feel it somewhere within his circuitry, but he wasn’t about to interrupt—he knew he wasn’t supposed to be here anyways. This was meant to be a conversation between siblings, something that Tenna wasn’t meant to have any part in. He was only here because he couldn’t physically be away from Spamton, a circumstance he’d created himself. He didn’t have any right to try to intervene.

“Please …” Banner let out, “please don’t disappear again … please …”

Spamton was quiet.

“… At least …” Banner continued, “… at least tell me before you go next time … please … please don’t leave without a word … promise me you won’t leave without a word again …”

“…” Spamton took in a breath, “… OKAY… OKAY… I PROMISE…”

Another lie… but a convincing one, at least by the way Banner seemed to relax.

“… Thank you … I …” Banner’s voice began to wobble again, “I’m sorry, Spam … I’m so, so sorry, I —”

“HEY,” Spamton pulled back just enough to look at Banner’s tearful face, “WE’RE [Looking to Turn a New Leaf?], YOU’RE [All Debts Forgiven], IT’S OKAY.”

Banner sniffled, “You don’t hate me … ?”

“COURSE NOT!” Spamton ruffled their hair, “WHAT KIND OF [Big Brother] DO YOU TAKE ME FOR? CAN’T STAY MAD AT MY [Baby Care Tips and Tricks] [Siblings You Never Knew About?] FORVER!”

Banner snorted as they wiped their eyes, “We’re practically the same age.”

“I’M STILL [[Older]].” Spamton grinned.

Banner cackled, “Barely!”

“Y’KNOW, I’M [[Start]]ING TO [Forgive and Forget] YOU LESS.” Spamton’s words were harsh, but by his tone it was clear there was no bite to them.

“No you’re not,” Banner smirked, “you said it yourself, you can’t stay mad at any of us — especially not your favorite.”

Spamton balked at that, “I DO NOT [Playing Favorites]!!!”

“You used to say I was your favorite all the time!” Banner’s grin grew wider.

Spamton rolled his eyes, “YEAH, BACK WHEN YOU WERE MY [One Time Only] SIBLING.”

“It still counts!” Banner countered.

Spamton crossed his arms, “NO IT DOESN’T!”

“Yes it does!” Banner said in a singsong voice.

“NUH-UH!”

“Yuh-huh!”

“NUH-UH!”

Rather than respond with words, Banner opted to stick their tongue out at Spamton in a way that almost made Tenna snort.

Spamton replied by sticking his own tongue out and Tenna couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him.

Tenna slapped his hand over his mouth as Banner’s eyes immediately snapped over to him, a flush of embarrassment painting their cheeks as their tongue was still out.

“Is … is that Mr. Tenna???” Banner practically squeaked as they quickly stood up and tried to fix their coat and scarf, a clear attempt to look presentable in front of the TV star.

Spamton’s eyes darted back and forth between Tenna and Banner, his mouth opening as if to blurt something out only to stop as a look of recognition flashed in his button eyes.

“HEY.” Spamton’s eyes narrowed as he looked at his younger sibling, “YOUR. CONTACTS. GLASSES. NOT WEARING THEM. EXPLAIN.”

“Spam, c’mon, you know me —” Banner jumped but quickly tried to play it off, “I mean, clearly I wore my contacts today! They’re just a little — I just didn't put them in right before I left the house!”

Spamton’s eyes narrowed further, “NICE TRY. EXPLAIN.”

“Would you believe me if I said that I was trying to see if ignorance was truly bliss?” Banner feigned an innocent smile.

“BANNER. ADDISON.”

“Hey wait! You’re changing the subject!” Banner turned their attention back to Tenna, “What happened to Mr. Tenna??? Why is he so small??? Why is he on your shoulder??? Why are you trying to deflect from that, huh???”

Spamton startled, clearly not wanting to divulge the truth of their situation. Tenna’s first impulse was to lie and say that he was simply there because they were going to go shopping together and he was small because didn’t want to attract a large crowd—what with him being famous and all—but he froze just as he was about to speak. Wait, he couldn’t lie. That was right. If he tried to lie he’d get interrupted by his own head. If he tried to tell a lie that Spamton would know was a lie, and he was interrupted, then Spamton would know that those weren’t only new vocal tics like what Spamton had. Then Spamton would realize that Tenna had been lying about what had happened and how they ended up tied together. Spamton would question him and Tenna wouldn’t be able to lie anymore and he’d eventually have to confess the truth and then Spamton would—Spamton would—Spamton would—

“WE WERE JUST GOING [Shop Local!].” Spamton’s voice brought Tenna out of his spiral, selling a lie that Tenna had been too caught up in his thoughts to go through with himself, “EASIER TO HIDE [Cathode] WHEN HE’S [[Travel Size]] IN CASE I GET [We Have You Surrounded] BY [Papa—Paparazzi!] OR [Man Mobbed by a Flock of Birds!!!] BY THE REST OF THE [8 Signs You’re An Oldest Sibling]S WHEN THEY SEE ME [[Alive and Well]].”

Banner snorted, “Seriously?”

“SERIOUSLY. DON’T WANT THE OTHERS [Your Advertisement Here] TO HIM.” Spamton crossed his arms, “THAT INCLUDES YOU [[2]].”

“I was actually just going to thank him,” Banner rolled their eyes, “but since you mentioned it, you can’t just call dibs without the whole family here — you made that rule.”

“YEAH, YEAH, YE4H, BUT [[Are You Seeing This]] IS DIFFERENT!!!” Spamton shot back, “[Cathode]’S MINE—”

Spamton froze as soon as the words left his mouth, but Tenna couldn’t stop the flower that bloomed from the tip of his nose at them. Spamton’s eyes drifted over to Tenna and he watched as a faint red hue began to speckle the mailman’s cheeks. Tenna could feel his mechanical heart thrumming and he wanted nothing more than to kiss Spamton in that moment. However, Tenna had to reign himself back in. Spamton’s words had… just been a slip of the tongue—something said in the heat of the moment. That’s right, he didn’t actually mean it. He’d just gotten a little lost in the lie. Right, that’s all this was. All of this was all still just to sell a lie and divert suspicion. Spamton was just… still really good at lying—so good that Tenna had forgotten that that’s what this all was. One big, long, drawn-out act.

And Tenna had been slacking.

“That’s right!” Tenna put on his award-winning smile, “I signed a contract for it and everything, so I’m all Spamton’s!”

Tenna watched as Spamton’s blush grew brighter, wide eyes staring at Tenna and breath hitching just slightly.

Wow, Spamton was still a really good actor!

“Oh … oh! Oh shit! When you said different, you meant —” Banner’s jaw practically hit the floor, “Holy shit, Spam, you and Tenna???”

“THAT— THAT— THAT—”

“That’s right!” Tenna helpfully cut in.

Tenna watched as Spamton’s face turned bright red.

“Wow, okay, that explains why … damn, never would have guessed. I mean, congrats you two!” Banner offered a smile at first, but then their face dropped as something seemed to dawn on them, “Oh wait — shit — does that mean that I — I didn’t mean to — I didn’t even know you two were — I mean you both looked like you’d been through hell anyways so I didn’t — I didn’t even think I could be interrupting — actually I really don’t want to know what or think about it, so I’m just — I’ll just come back later! Congratulations again you two, I’m so sorry I interrupted, I’m just … I’m just going to go … I’ll be back later to check in and … yeah … yup … see you later!”

Banner hurriedly ran out, making sure to close the door behind them as they left.

“I don’t know why they’re apologizing,” Tenna tilted his head curiously, “we opened the door before they could knock, so it’s not like they were interrupting us.”

Spamton slowly turned to look at Tenna, mouth agape, “WHAT! THE! [Fifty Percent Off]!? WHAT WAS [[That]], [Cathode]!?”

“What was what?” Tenna looked at Spamton confused before the question clicked, “Oh! I figured I’d help you sell our alibi—now no one’ll question why we’re sticking so close together while we sort everything out! Especially after our—bzzt—What an incredible performance from our guests—”

Oh…

That…

That must just… be because Tenna wasn’t really confident with how his own act went.

Right…

That had to be it…

Spamton looked at Tenna, “… RIGHT… OUR [[Solid Alibi]]… SURE— WAIT— [$!?!] THE PRESSES! BB DIDN’T EXPLAIN WHY [Quality Glass Frames]!”

“Maybe they just lost them?” Tenna offered.

“JUST LOST THEM? JUST LOST THEM?? WHAT DO [[U]] MEAN JUST [[Lost and Found]]???” Spamton snapped at Tenna as he’d said something offensive, “THEY PROBABLY JUST LOST THEIR [Contact List], SURE, BUT THEIR GLASSES??? [Trash heap] WE ALL [Spawning Objects] INTO 3XISTANCE WITH THESE! THEY”RE A [Piece by Piece] OF US!! IF WE LOSE THESE, IT’S A BIG [%!&*]ING [Problem!!!], NO, BB WAS WAY TOO CALM TO HAVE LOST THEM…”

Oh. That… that explained why Spamton was always so protective over his glasses.

“Oh…um…sorry…” Tenna felt himself shrink a little more, “I didn’t…sorry…”

Spamton stopped and let out a sigh, scooping Tenna back into his hands.

“[!$!#], NO, I’M [Reply All: Sorry I Didn’t Mean To Send That], YOU DIDN’T KNOW, I JUST…” Spamton started to pet his antenna, “LOOK, I’M WORRIED. SOMETHING HAPPENED AND THEY [Keeping Secrets] ABOUT IT…”

Tenna relaxed a bit and looked up at Spamton, an idea coming to mind, “Well, they only just left, maybe if we hurry we can catch up with them and get some answers before we see that magician you—”

Spamton froze, a look crossing his face, one that Tenna was very familiar with.

Tenna couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled out of him.

“You honestly forgot—”

“[?@$!]!”