Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

To say Donnie was thriving in college may have been an overstatement. Sure, academically they were flourishing. A straight A student, liked by the professors, and genuinely enjoying classes. No, it seemed to be everything else that was the issue. The first three months were perfect for Donnie. They were a sponge for knowledge, absorbing as much information as possible from classes, and enjoying alone time to get projects finished. No Mikey pulling them away from work for a meal. No Raph cheering loudly from the living room for whatever wrestling match he was watching. No Leo pestering them with a dumb joke. Just peace and learning.

But alas, Donnie’s dumb emotions caught up with them. Gross.

As much as Donnie would like to be a robot and simply keep working and advancing, they were cursed with a human body. A human body with emotional and physical needs. Suddenly, their mode dropped, along with their productivity, and Donnie came to the horrifying conclusion that they were lonely. They missed Mikey’s home cooked meals, now sometimes going far too long without eating. They missed Ralph’s enthusiasm and spending time with him. They were even loath to admit they missed Leo’s dumb jokes. And staying up late with Leo when neither could sleep. And ranting to Leo about their day. And listening to
Leo’s absurd Jupiter Jim theories. And Leo nagging them about wearing their back brace.

God, Donnie missed their twin.

Which was ridiculous to Donnie, because Leo and them texted each other almost every day and FaceTimed at least once a week with the other two brothers. However, family FaceTime calls were starting to crush them when Leo, Raph, and April would all hunker down in Raph's dorm room, always arguing about the camera angle. Because a journey to Raph’s dorm was about five minutes for his twin and best friend. It was hard when Mikey’s face would poop up, their father squinting in the background. Mikey still lived with him after all, having yet to graduate high school.

It was especially challenging when all five would appear on the same screen once a month. Sure, Raph, Leo, and April were at college, but only being forty-five minutes away made it easy to get together once a month for a family dinner at their dads house. All Donnie could do was watch from three and a half hours away, longing to be there with the family. They felt planets away from them, the distance massive. Uncrossable.

Especially without a car.

Donnie sighed and leaned back in the uncomfortable library chair they had found themselves camped out in for the last few hours. Their back ached horribly and they started to regret not grabbing their brace. Splayed out in front of Donnie was several text books on car coding systems. They weren’t particularly into cars, but were hoping pulling some ideas from automotive technology could help finish the bugs in their robotics project. They weren’t getting very far. They pulled their headphones off to rub the sides of their head, hoping to alleviate some discomfort from an oncoming headache.

“The coding in Toyota’s probably isn't the best to base other projects on.”

Donnie jumped about five feet in the air at the new voice. They whipped around to find a fellow student suddenly occupying the seat next to them. At least, they assumed he was a student. His frame was wider, compared to Donnie’s thin, lanky limbs, but they could see muscle peaking out of his t-shirt. Dark bangs framed his face, though the rest of his hair was pulled back into a small ponytail. He wore a smile, seemingly unaware of the heart attack he just gave Donnie.

“I mean don’t get me wrong, they’re engines are great and a Toyota will last you forever, but a lot of those cars have coding issues where the warning lights will just show up on the dash and never go away.” The brunette continued to talk, as if Donnie hadn’t reacted at all.

“Excuse me,” they asked, incredulously. They were having a hard time processing his words, given how jarring and sudden his appearance was.

“Oh, I’ve just been watching you sit here for a while with those books,” he motioned to the various in depth car manuals scattered around the table. “And I wanted to save you the time and effort and let you know not to go with Toyota’s coding for whatever project it is you’re working on. You had your headphones on though, which is like the universal sign that someone doesn’t want to be talked to, so I waited until you took them off.”

Donnie’s face must’ve been nothing short of flabbergasted, yet the other student continued to smile at them.

“You do realize how creepy that sounds, right? I’ve been sitting here for close to four hours and you’ve been watching me?”

His face fell and he brought his hands up in a defensive manner. “Oh no, I didn’t mean it like that! You just looked stuck and I wanted to help, I’ve only been here for like twenty minutes! I promise,” he suddenly cut himself off, his brows furrowing in confusion. “Wait, you've been sitting here for four hours? Without a break?”

“Yes?” There was a beat of awkward silence where the other student just started at Donnie. They cringed internally, suddenly hoping this interaction would be over soon. This is probably why Donnie was so lonely, because they couldn’t get through a social interaction without messing up or being awkward. It made them never want to talk to people outside of their family.

“Well anyways, my name is Timothy, but most people call me Tim,” the other student's voice, now known to be named Tim, quickly brought them back to the moment. Donnie looked over to find Tim holding his hand out.

Ew, physical contact with a stranger, Donnie thought, staring at the hand presented to them. Before they could muster up the courage to reciprocate, Tim seemed to pick up on their discomfort, retracting his hand but continuing to smile at Donnie. Now that there was no handshake expected of them, they relaxed marginally.

“I’m Donnie,” they supplied. Tim’s face seemed to light up more, and he sat back in the chair he had appeared in.

“Nice to meet you! So I have this study group, we meet every other day around this time and I think you should come! We have snacks and take mandatory breaks so you won’t be stuck for hours on end.” Donnie blanched, certainly not expecting that invitation. Who was this random guy? And why was he inviting Donnie to a ‘study group’?

“Oh no, I prefer to work alone,” they exclaimed. Tim never stopped smiling as they leaned an elbow on the table, quirking an eyebrow.

“If you come, I bet I could help you figure all this out,” Tim said, gesturing to the mess in front of them. Donnie hesitated at that. They’d been stuck on this project for a while, mostly because their emotions were so tangled, but also the logistics had them stumped. They were being offered a solution on a silver platter, even if that meant going so far outside their comfort zone.

Leo did encourage them to make some friends. But Leo had always been the more socially outgoing of the two.

“How many people are in this ‘study group’,” Donnie asked hesitantly.

“Just four! Five if you stopped by!” Donnie bit his lip and averted his gaze. Channel your inner Leo, Donnie thought.

They sighed before mumbling, “where and when do you guys meet?”

Tim beamed at Donnie. It was almost infectious.

Chapter Text

Technically speaking, Tim didn’t lie about anything in his conversation with Donnie. He never asked for their name, because Tim already knew who they were. Donnie just happened to supply that information. Which also meant that Tim’s theory about them not realizing the two students were in the same engineering class stood true. He also did technically have a study group, but it was him and his three roommates gathering in their living room to body double each other through homework. One said roommate gave Tim an unimpressed look that he could feel, despite being elbow deep in the engine of the car he was working on.

“No, you didn’t lie, but you didn’t give them the full truth either,” Jeremy said.

“They didn’t ask any clarifying questions to be fair,” Tim argued. From an outside perspective, this conversation sounded bad, he realized.

“I think this is great! It goes to show they must not be as smart as people think they are if they didn’t recognize you,” Kendra added, jumping to sit on the tool table that sat in the corner of the garage. Tim rolled his eyes, despite the fact he knew Kendra couldn’t see it.

“Yeah, I don’t think you being a bitch is going to help anything,” Jeremy murmured.

The whole situation had begun a month ago, at the start of the new quarter. Tim’s engineering class was full of students he barely recognized, but one had stood out to him. They were short, with a full head of tightly curled hair that was always pulled back into a ponytail, little strands sticking out by the side of their face. They always sat in the back of the class, never talked unless spoken to by the teacher, and generally just seemed checked out. However, no matter how uninterested they seemed in the class, they always supplied a correct answer when asked. They even corrected the professor on a mistake he made the third day into class. Perhaps it was Tim’s friendly nature, but he was thoroughly intrigued. When he asked his roommates, formally known as ‘The Purple Dragons’, if they had any idea who this student was, Kendra had cackled at him.

“That sounds like Donnie, good luck making friends with them.”

Tim was a little peeved Kendra just assumed his intention was to become their friend, no matter how true it was, but he was mostly curious at that point. Clearly they had history with Donnie he didn’t know about, so he asked further. Turns out, Donnie had joined the tech club the three of them ran in high school and, in typical high school Kendra fashion, she stole a handful of their coding and blueprints. One thing led to another, and eventually Donnie and Kendra had been pegged against each other as the two smartest students in the school.

Until the end of sophomore year.

Kendra was going through what she called ‘major character development,’ and lots of therapy, so Jace and Jeremy recommended she apologize to Donnie. Maybe even become their friend. She agreed, a little reluctantly, but before Kendra got the chance, Donnie had disappeared. Stopped showing up to school, no attendance to social gatherings, simply vanished. Summer came and went, and they finally saw Donnie again when junior year started.

Three math grades ahead of even Kendra and attending college classes in a program called Running Start.

Seeing as most of Donnie's classes were now located at the local community college, the tech group hardly ever saw them at the high school. And when they were in the building, Donnie was constantly flanked by their three brothers, who glared at Kendra if she tried to approach.

“I regret being such a dick to them and never apologizing," Kendra had lamented during the conversation. She had that far away look in her eyes, the one she got when thinking about unsavory things from her past. Jace had put a comforting hand on her shoulder in silent support.

Donnie had graduated high school with their Associates degree, and despite going to the same college, the three of them hardly ever saw Donnie around. A lonely peer with a mysterious back story? Tim decided at that very moment he was going to become their friend, and declared as much to his roommates. Jace and Jeremy agreed, saying that they would be a nice addition to their little friend group. Kendra still seemed reluctant, but eventually claimed that ‘collaborating with them might be useful’, which was Kendra’s way of being excited.

Tim had struggled to even get a second with Donnie, despite being in the same class. They were always in and out of the classroom so fast, Tim would look up when the class was dismissed and they were already gone. Donnie was like a ghost haunting his engineering course, their presence fleeting and hard to catch. Almost as if they were trying to blend in with the shadows, to be unseen. So when Tim saw them in the library, taking up space and existing, he jumped on the chance.

Jace huffed from where he was sitting on the only chair in the garage. It wasn't the best hangout spot, but they always seemed to all congregate there when Tim was working on a car.

“I think we're all overlooking the fact that you definitely creeped them out with your ‘out of the blue approach’, Timothy,” Jace commented, not looking up from the laptop situated on his lap. Tim cringed, straightening himself from his hunched position over the car.

“Yeah, not my best move. But I was getting desperate!" Jeremy hummed in thought, drawing Tim’s attention to him.

“The Hamato siblings were always bigger than life, at least in high school. They were all talented in their own ways and proud about it. Donnie was the quietest one, especially compared to their twin, but they were still…hard to miss,” Jeremy said.

“Ha, yeah because they never shut up,” Kendra scoffed. “Nobody in that family knew how to stop talking honestly.”

“You’re one to talk,” Jace grumbled from his chair. Kendra gasped dramatically, but Jace ignored her to finally look up at Tim. “The point is, it’s kinda weird it has taken so long to get Donnie to talk to you.”

“In high school, if you approached them with any kind of coding or tech question, you’d be stuck in a forty-five minute conversation about all the specific details of whatever you asked,” Jeremy added. Tim rubbed his chin, thinking about the new information. It all sounded so contradictory to the person he knew from his engineering class. What happened, Tim found himself thinking, not for the first time.

“Dude, gross,” Kendra said, suddenly tossing a rag at him. Tim realized his hands were still covered in oil and grease, the hands he just used to touch his face.

“How many siblings do they have,” Tim asked, whipping himself down.

“Three, an older and younger brother, plus a twin brother,” Kendra supplied. “They were all really close, but the twins especially were basically attached at the hip.”

“I wonder where their brothers are? I’ve never seen Donnie without at least one of them for this long,” Jeremy mused.

“Leo and Raph go to Cornell University. I don’t think Mikey has graduated high school yet.”

Damn, an Ivy League school, Tim thought. That shouldn’t have surprised him, considering they all went to a selective technology school, but sometimes it was still hard to believe he was attending such a prestigious college. Jeremy furrowed his brow further, looking even more confused.

“How do you know that,” Jeremy asked. Kendra simply shrugged, still scrolling through her phone.

“I follow April on Instagram, she goes there too.” Tim was starting to get lost, not knowing who April is, so he decided to bring the conversation back around.

“Anyways, I gave Donnie my phone number, so I guess it’s up to them to reach out,” Tim said, rubbing his knuckles nervously. “Hopefully I didn’t scare them away.” Kendra finally looked up from her phone only to smirk at Tim.

“Ohhhh, you guys exchanged phone numbers? Next thing you know you’re gonna be planning a date with them,” she teased. Tim didn’t hesitate to chuck his dirty rag at her. Kendra shrieked, attempting to bat it away while Tim closed the hood of the car.

Hopefully Donnie texts me soon, Tim thought as he excited the garage.

Chapter Text

Donnie curled up tighter in their little hide away. It was a spot they frequently found themselves existing in, a small nook between two buildings. One wall jutted out further than the other creating an alcove hidden to outside eyes. The corner was located in an area that didn’t see much foot traffic, so it was perfect for an overstimulated Donnie. However, that’s not why Donnie was there at that particular moment.

“I think you should do it,” Leo’s voice rang through their headphones. “I mean, what could possibly go wrong?”

“Would you like that list in alphabetical order, or best to worst case scenario,” Donnie responded sarcastically, rolling their eyes, despite the fact that Leo couldn't see the action through the phone.

Donnie stared at the message that still sat unanswered, even two weeks later. The chat consisted of one word, a simple ‘Hey!’ received from the other number. Tim had sent the message while sitting with Donnie in the library, to make sure they each had the correct number. They had re-read the single word obsessively, typing and deleting hundreds of responses. Donnie couldn’t help but feel like the empty chat was reflective of their life currently, barren and alone, the prospect of help dangling right in front of them. All they had to do was grasp it. All they had to do was respond. And yet.

“Dude, you’re worrying too much about it,” Leo chuckled. “This was like the time in high school when you made yourself sick trying to decide if you wanted to join the theater club!”

“I was worried I would be forced to perform on stage when all I wanted to do was man the lights,” Donnie grumbled, but a small smile tugged at their features.

“Yes, but when I forced you to join, they were thrilled to just let you stay on tech. You even got to work on the sound board and loved it!”

Leo had made sure to attend all of Donnie’s performances, even if they never actually were on stage. He knew the work Donnie did in that theater club meant a lot to them. They looked back down at the mostly empty chat. They had made Tim’s contact name ‘weird library guy’, despite knowing his name. Donnie’s brows furrowed, their smile dropping.

“Okay, but that was a reputable, after school program. This is a group of some random people!”

“Their students, just like you, Donnie.”

“He was watching me in the library! That’s weird, right?” Donnie couldn't understand how Leo wasn’t as wary about this as they were.

“Maybe he just didn’t know how to approach you,” Leo asked. He sighed, and Donnie could perfectly picture the way he rubbed his face, something he did when Donnie wasn’t seeming to understand the point. “I love you sib, you know I do, but you’re not the most approachable person.”

Donnie curled up tighter, trying to make themselves as small as possible. Their binder dug into their ribs uncomfortably, and the press of the cement wall on their back sent shocks of pain. It would certainly be more comfortable to be curled up in their dorm room, but that wasn’t an option currently. A wave of despair washed over them, at Leo’s description of them, and the situation in general. Leo seemed to take Donnie’s silence as an invitation to continue talking.

“Maybe he’s just socially awkward? Does that sound familiar to you?”

“Shut up,” Donnie mumbled half heartedly.

“All I’m saying is that you should just give it a chance dude,” Leo said, his tone almost sounding pleading. “Worse comes to worse, it sucks and you never have to see those people again. Best case scenario, you get help with your project, and potentially make new friends. You can’t just hang out with your roommate all the time.”

Donnie scoffed at that. If frequently being kicked out of your dorm because your roommate was having sex counted as hanging out, then yeah, Donnie was best friends with their roommate. That’s why Donnie had found themselves hidden away in the alcove to call Leo. They had wanted to curl up under their weighted blanket after classes to have this conversation, but the moment they walked into the dorm, Donnie had simply turned and left. Jared, their roommate, had some girl riding his dick. Loudly.

“Okay, okay, do you want to make a pro’s and con’s list,” Leo offered, and Donnie could hear the kind smile in his voice.

Yes, oh god please yes, was their immediate thought, but Donnie paused. They bit their lip, looking up towards the darkening sky. It was getting late, and making a list always took them at least an hour, and Leo had mentioned needing to finish an essay while they were texting earlier. Every fiber of Donnie’s being was screaming to make that list with their twin, like they always would, but they hesitated.

“Tello,” Leo prompted. Apparently Donnie had been quiet for too long, which made sense, seeing as they usually jumped at the offer to lay out their complicated thoughts in a neat list. That’s why Leo had offered, because he knew Donnie better then they knew themselves. 

However, Donnie also knew Leo would sacrifice an assignment for his twin.

“No, I think I’ll just… ask Tim for some more details,” Donnie lied.

The best part about being so far away from their brothers was that it was easier to lie over the phone. It was coming in handy with the treasure cove of secrets they’d been keeping recently. Whether Donnie actually reached out to Tim was still up for debate, but they didn’t want to worry Leo more than they already had. There was an odd moment of silence from Leo’s end.

“God, who are you and what have you done with my Dontron,” Leo asked dramatically, though there was an edge to his voice Donnie couldn’t decipher. “My twin would never turn down making a list!” Donnie rolled their eyes again, but smiled fondly.

“Believe it or not Nardo, I am capable of existing without my lists.”

“Blasphemy,” Leo suddenly shouted. “Now I know you’re not my Donnie, they would never slander their lists like that! Next thing I know, you’re going to tell me you’re dating someone! Before me!”

“It wouldn’t be that surprising, seeing as I am the superior twin,” Donnie countered. They chuckled when Leo spluttered on the other side of the line.

“Lies,” Leo insisted. He waited for Donnie to stop laughing before continuing to speak. “How’s your back doing, by the way? Are you remembering to wear your brace?”

Donnie cringed a little. They knew if Leo was standing in front of them, he would be giving Donnie a critical look, causing them to haunch into themselves and quickly try to change the subject. It’s not like Donnie forgot the brace on purpose, or because they wanted to be in pain, sometimes it was simply too much of an inconvenience to grab it. Or it was too hard to pull themselves out of the hyper focus long enough to put it on. Leo pulled them back to the conversation with a judgmentful tsk.

“Your silence is very telling, my dear twin.” Okay lying over the phone was easier, but Donnie was still not good at it apparently.

“It has been…adequate,” Donnie responded slowly. They could almost feel Leo narrowing his eyes.

“Donatello.”

Shit, full name, Donnie thought. I’m fucked.

“incorporating when to wear my brace has been a challenge, given this new schedule,” Donnie sighed. They decided to half truth their way out of this. “Admitittly, I have not been wearing it as much as I probably should, but I’m getting better as I adjust! And honestly, the pain hasn’t been that bad.” As if to spite Donnie, pain shot up their back, and they winced. They had probably been sitting against the hard wall for too long. There was a deafening silence, Leo analyzing their words.

“Okay, I’ll give it to you this time,” Leo finally said, and Donnie felt themselves untense marginally. “I’m glad you're getting better about remembering, but there’s no way to overuse that thing dude. The brace is there to help, I don’t want you to be in pain. That was the whole point of the surgery.”

Donnie’s stomach dropped to their toes. They hated when Leo talked about it like that, like surgery hadn’t helped them at all. That just wasn’t true. Donnie went from not being able to move some days, to more simple chronic pain that didn’t render them paralyzed. They knew Leo hated seeing Donnie in pain, and seeing them so tormented by their condition was hard on Donnie’s twin. Leo, along with the rest of Donnie’s family, seemed to have hope that the surgery would eliminate their pain all together. So, the Hamato’s, Leo in particular, were crushed when they learned Donnie would be dealing with chronic pain for the rest of their life. However, Donnie knew that was coming, it was just a part of their life they had come to accept.

“I know, Leo,” Donnie soothed. They were supposed to not be stressing their twin out. “But you know change is hard for me, and I’m trying, so you gotta give me a little credit.”

“I am, I am,” Leo defended. “I just don’t like that I can’t nag you about it every hour of every day anymore.”

His tone was joking, but Donnie could read between the lines. Leo missed them. It should have made them feel better, but guilt suddenly clogged their throat. Donnie didn’t want their twin to be feeling the way they were, it was miserable. They knew it was worse for Leo too, because he worried about Donnie’s pain and less than adequate social skills. They wanted him to be enjoying college, along with April and Raph, not constantly agonizing about Donnie all the time. That line of thinking is what compelled Donnie to change the subject.

“Oh please, you still nag me about it over text,” Donnie scoffed. They put all the bravado they could muster into their tone. “You never shut up about my brace, as well as that guy in your pre-med class. Didn’t you have a story to tell me about him?” Leo only hesitated momentarily, potentially detecting the subject change, before he was off to the races with the new topic.

“Oh my god, Donnie, you have no idea how cute this guy is! And yesterday he asked me for a pencil,” Leo began his excited rambling. Donnie smiled, settling back into their hiding place and getting ready to listen to their beloved twin for however long Leo went on for.

—

Donnie and Leo ended up talking for about half an hour longer, before they encouraged Leo to go do the assignment he was putting off. When Donnie stepped into their dorm it was much quieter. The scent of cheap cologne hung in the air- most likely an attempt to cover up the stench of sex. Jared was sitting on his loft bed, laptop in front of him, only sparing Donnie a momentary glance.

“What’s up tranny,” Jared greeted. They scoffed loudly, and made sure Jared saw their eye roll. Donnie honestly couldn’t tell if the two of them would banter back and forth, or if they hated each other. Leo and them playfully called each other slurs- but they were related and both queer. This was a straight man insulting Donnie’s gender identity, but maybe they were reading the situation wrong.

“Get better material, I’ve been called that hundreds of times. Loses its effect after a while,” Donnie said, slipping their shoes off and moving towards their loft. “We should get a sign to hang on our door, so I can stop walking in on your… sexual escapades,”

“Ew dude, just call it sex you weirdo.”

Donnie didn’t grace that with a response throwing their messenger bag at the foot of their bed ladder. Donnie grabbed some sweatpants and a t-shirt before shuffling to the bathroom to change. Their whole body sagged with relief once the binder was wrestled off. Donnie moved through the paces of their night routine robotically. They couldn’t help but miss when this routine was completed with Leo by their side, playfully bumping shoulders, or venting about the day. Their already less than ideal mood soured. This wasn’t just their autistic hatred for change, they were struggling without the support system of their brothers. Donnie eventually found themselves curled on their side in bed, doom scrolling Twitter.

“It was good sex by the way, thanks for asking,” Jared suddenly spoke into the silence of the room. “She had a massive rack, might even see if she wants to come around again.”

“Now who’s the weirdo? I don’t want to hear about your sex life,” Donnie groaned. “Do you even know her name?”

“Nope! She’s just in my phone as ‘big boobs, blonde hair’.”

“You’re revolting." Donnie rolled so they were facing away from Jared, pulling the blanket over their head, hoping he would get the hint and shut up.

“It’s not my fault you like, hate sex or something. My last roommate loved to hear about my sex!” Donnie desperately hoped if they stayed quiet long enough, Jared would stop talking. Alas, the universe would grant them no such mercy. “Actually, I don’t think you hate sex, it’s just that nobody wants to get in bed with your nerdy ass. You probably get off on what you see of my ‘escapades,’ cause you definitely ain’t getting any of your own!”

Donnie was seriously growing uncomfortable with the conversation. If this was banter, they didn’t like it. Jared knew hardly anything about Donnie, so in their eyes, he had no reason to be claiming such things. However, his tone was light and jokey, so it was very possible Donnie was missing a social cue. One where they were supposed to be enjoying this conversation.

“Do you know how to shut the fuck up,” Donnie said behind gritted teeth. Jared merely laughed, sharp and punctuated. The response felt hostile in the otherwise stagnant room and Donnie pulled the blanket tighter around themselves.

“The day you bring someone to this dorm is the day pigs fly!”

Donnie had officially heard enough. They pulled their earbuds out, because headphones were too uncomfortable to lay down in, shoving both into their ears. The sound canceling mode was Donnie’s life saver, because if Jared had said anything else, it was lost to them. They shuffled their favorite playlist before settling into their curled position again. Sure, Jared didn’t know Donnie, but clearly their complete social inadequacy was more obvious than they thought. It hurt, knowing a person they tried to interact with minimally, could see through the defensive shield they’d put up. Maybe, Donnie truly was just that miserable.

They wormed an arm out of the safety of their blanket, searching for their phone. After half a second of awkward patting, Donnie found the device, pulling it into their sanctuary. Wearily, they opened that empty chat with Tim.

‘Hi, when is your study group meeting next? Where is it located?’ 

Donnie hesitated for a moment, but hit the send arrow before quickly slamming their phone face down.

I can’t believe I just sent that, they thought frantically to themselves. Oh god, what if he doesn’t even want to help with my project anymore? It has been two weeks-

Before their thoughts could further spiral, Donnie’s phone buzzed softly. They flipped it over to find Tim had texted back immediately.

‘Yay!! So happy you wanna come still! Were meeting tmrw around 5pm in study room 206 cant wait to see you!’

Donnie almost smiled at how enthusiastic he seemed. Almost.

‘Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.’

And with that, they turned their phone on ‘Do Not Disturb,’ and curled up a little tighter to try and sleep.

Chapter Text

Donnie was never one to pace, they much preferred stimming through their hands to help relieve emotions too big to simply feel. Besides, Leo always did enough pacing for the both of them. However, Donnie could confidently say they were going to pace a hole into the floor in the secluded hallway around the corner from room two-zero-six. They were seriously starting to regret agreeing to come as nervous energy burned through their body.

Why did I think I could do this, Donnie thought. They let out a sigh that sounded closer to a whine, gripping at the roots of their hair. The zing of mild irritation from the action was a little grounding. It’s not too late to just go back to my dorm, and they were about half way through the action of turning around to do just that, when they were reminded of Leo’s words of encouragement.

“Worse comes to worse, it sucks and you never have to see those people again,” he had said.

Donnie halted in their brief retreat back to their dorm, biting their lip in thought. Leo wasn’t wrong. Their College was huge, much bigger than high school had been, and very rarely did Donnie see the same person twice in their classes. It was unlikely they would ever see these people again, if Donnie decided they hated them.

With that in mind, and Leo’s confidence in them, Donnie took a large inhale of breath. They squared their shoulders and rounded the corner, ending up in front of the study room. They clenched and unclenched their fists a few times in an agitated stim, before reaching for the door handle and yanking it open.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Othello Von Ryan,” a grating voice greeted them. Donnie recognized it immediately.

“Nope,” they stated, turning on their heels to make a hasty exit. Twin groans of annoyance were heard, accompanied by the scraping of a chair as someone got out of their seat.

“Donnie wait,” Tim called, making his way over to them. Donnie spun swiftly back around, glaring at Tim. He recoiled, seeming caught off guard by the reaction.

“So, this was all some ploy to steal my tech again,” Donnie’s voice was flat, it was the only thing keeping the dam of emotions from bursting.

God, I’m so stupid, they thought. Of course Tim had ulterior motives for inviting me.

It reminded them of a time in high school when a group of kids suddenly started being nice to Donnie on a random Tuesday. Months of supposed friendship was ruined by Raph saying the students were talking shit behind their back. The group claimed they only hung out with them to get the answers to all the homework and tests. When that information came out, Mikey couldn’t believe Donnie had accepted any of the group's actions as nice.

“They were so obviously teasing you! Why did you put up with it,” Mikey had exclaimed, an upset tone ringing through his voice. Because they were Autistic and socially inept apparently. The two weren’t always paired together, but Donnie was just cursed with both.

“What no! That’s not why I invited you,” Tim said frantically. Donnie was brought back to the current, horrible social situation they found themselves in.

“Way to go, Kendra. That was a great way to start this conversation,” the sarcasm practically oozed from Jeremy’s voice when he spoke up.

“What? I thought it might make them feel more comfortable,” Kendra claimed. She had a wicked smile plastered on her face though. The other three boys in the room turned to glare at her, obviously not impressed with her antics. Donnie placed their hands on their hips, cocking an eyebrow at Kendra.

“If this is some plan to get your hands on my work, it’s really not panning out for you.” A funny expression crossed Kendra’s face, making Donnie’s seething emotions hesitate slightly. It was gone so fast, they wondered if they had imagined it.

“Gross, as if I’d want to steal your work again,” Kendra chuckled. “It probably wouldn’t get me very far anyways.” Yup, moment of hesitation over.

“Really? That’s not the impression I got when you were using my personal AI code to get A’s on your assignments.” Donnie poured all the attitude they had into their words. It was months worth of built up sass, enough to make Kendra shrink a little. This interaction was almost easier than if the room had been full of strangers. At least Donnie knew how to conduct themselves around the Purple Dragons.

“No, Kendra is not here to steal your work, and that’s not why I invited you,” Tim claimed, making sure to punctuate the statement with a scathing look towards Kendra. “I invited you to actually help you with that project! I didn’t even know you knew these three, well technically I found out because we’re all roommates, but if anything this was a ploy to get you guys to make up!”

And Donnie had heard enough. “Yup, I’m out,” Donnie said, cutting off Tim’s rambling and making a reach for the door again.

“Donnie, wait.” The way Kendra’s voice lost its flippant edge made them pause. “Look, it was fucked up what I did in high school, I’m not denying that. I was a shitty person and my actions reflected that. But! I had some character development!”

“And a lot of therapy,” Jace pipped up for the first time.

“Shut up Jace! Okay yes, and therapy, but I wanted to apologize to you in sophomore year, but you kinda disappeared off the face of the earth.”

Donnie cringed, sophomore year had been when they got surgery and yeah they did 'kinda disappear,' espicially from school. Finally turning back to the rest of the room, Donnie was greeted with Kendra standing the closest to them now. Her expression was open and vulnerable, something not commonly seen from the girl. Regret seemed to shimmer in her eyes, so Kendra was either a really good actor suddenly, or she was being genuine.

“Now listen closely, because I’m only saying this once. I’m very sorry for what happened in high school, you never did anything wrong and it was bitchy of me to take advantage of your enthusiasm to share your work with our group,” Kendra sighed, suddenly holding her hand out for Donnie. “I regret ruining the potential friendship between us, because I think we could’ve been good friends. So, I’m sorry and I hope you can forgive me.”

If Donnie was a computer, they probably would’ve blue screened at that point. Hearing Kendra string that many civil words together, and directed at them no less, was unheard of. The two were known for being rivals and teachers dreaded having them in the same class in high school. However, that was almost three years ago, and Donnie had changed a lot within those years. Who’s to say Kendra couldn’t change too?

They glanced around the room to gauge the other’s reaction. Tim had a hopeful sparkle in his eyes, rapidly glancing between Donnie and Kendra. Jace and Jeremy seemed more relaxed, though the two still seemed invested. Donnie wasn’t good at making decisions on the spot, they needed at least five business days to think, and plan, and process! They needed to call Leo for gods sake! Leo for sure would not approve of this though, he would’ve never told Donnie to come if he knew about the Purple Dragons.

However, they had originally joined the tech group to have fun and make friends. Before everything went to shit, Donnie remembers enjoying themselves and looking forward to their time with the Purple Dragons, that’s why it hurt so bad when Kendra betrayed them. What if they could have that now? Donnie had made plenty of mistakes in high school they regretted, who’s to say Kendra couldn’t do the same? Maybe she did genuinely regret stealing from Donnie?

I’m going to regret this, Donnie thought. They steeled themselves before swiftly reaching for Kendra’s hand.

“You are forgiven for now,” Donnie stated flatly. “But make no mistake, I won’t be so gracious if that happens again.”

“Yes,” Tim cheered. It was enduring to watch him pump his fist in the air and spin a small circle, clearly ecstatic with the outcome. The whole room seemed to lose twenty pounds of tension, even Kendra visibly sagged with relief.

“Oh thank god,” she sighed. Donnie retracted their hand, shoving it into their jacket pockets and clenching their fists rapidly. The hidden stim helped wash away some of their own tension. “I’m so glad I never have to do that again.”

“So how long have you been rehearsing that,” Donnie asked. Kendra collapsed into a chair and grinned a little at them. It wasn’t malicious or snarky, more akin to a playful expression.

“Literal years, dude,” she replied.

“We had to listen to her practice and change it about a hundred times,” Jeremy interjected, placing himself in the chair next to her. Jace joined them with his laptop, only contributing by giving Donnie a small smile, before staring intently at whatever he was doing again.

“When Mr. Bleeding hearts over there,” Kendra jabbed a thumb over her shoulder towards Tim. “Came home claiming he wanted to make friends with the quiet kid in his engineering class, he decided it would be a good time for us to finally make amends.”

Donnie suddenly had many questions.

“Wait, back track. Why didn’t you just have that conversation with me in high school if it’s been that long,” was their first question, directed at Kendra. They turned to Tim, who had stopped his celebration to join them at the table. “And how do you know me again? I mean, besides creepily coming up to me in the library.” That earned a snicker from the rest of the room, and Tim groaned.

“Okay, I’ll admit that wasn’t my smartest move. But dude, we’re in the same engineering class! And I kept trying to talk to you in class, but you’re like a ninja or something because you’d disappear so fast!”

“You should’ve seen him the day he talked to you in the library! He was all giddy until he realized how weird that was,” Kendra laughed. Donnie was taken back, not only by the fact that Tim wanted to talk to them, but also the fact that the two shared a class. How did they not recognize him? Even now, examining Tim with a critical gaze brought no recollection.

Jace grinned from where he was still looking at his laptop. “He was even more giddy when you texted him last night.”

“Okay! You guys can stop now,” Tim sputtered. A small blush tinted his pale checks and he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I was just excited you would be coming today!”

“Yeah, you almost face planted down the stairs in your ‘excitement’ to tell us Donnie was coming,” Kendra snickered. Tim’s face exploded a flustered red color, his roommates simply laughing at him. “But to answer your second question; I never apologized in high school because I couldn’t get within ten feet of you without your guard dog of brothers growling at me.”

The smile that had been forming, at Tim's expense, fell when Donnie heard that . Yeah, their brothers become over protective of them after the Purple Dragons incident, especially Leo. The day Donnie had learned Kendra betrayed them was the day their twin decided she was enemy number one. To be fair, they came home and had one of the worst shutdowns of their high school career. Leo had to spend an hour sitting outside their shared closet, trying to coax Donnie out.

God, Leo would pummel me if he knew I was willingly in the same room as her right now.

“Yeah, my brothers are like that.”

“You don’t say,” Kendra scoffed, before the room lapsed into silence.

Suddenly feeling uncomfortable again, Donnie fiddled with the strap of their bag to keep their hands busy. It had the added bonus of relieving some weight off their back, which was getting sore from standing with their bag for so long. That thought process led Donnie to realize the award lull in the conversation wasn’t the only off putting thing, so was the fact that they were the only one still standing.

Okay, I’ve reached my limit for none awkward social interactions for the day, Donnie thought, scuffing their feet along the floor. They desperately wanted to stim in an attempt to alleviate some of the sudden social stress, but decided against it. Just as Donnie was planning to flee for their dorm room again, Tim smiled and spoke up.

“Now that that’s all settled, let's get to work on your project, Donnie.” Tim patted the seat next to him and they stiffly sat down.

The Project Donnie had been stuck on for over two weeks, took three hours to finish with Tim's insight. The group mostly worked in silence, aside from a stray question every now and then, and information exchanged between Donnie and Tim. He was easy to talk to, Donnie found. The whole time spent there was pleasant, light in a way they felt most social interactions weren’t. No heavy burdens of the extensive dos and don'ts that seemed to accompany most conversations. And if Donnie was a little less stressed as they made their way back to their dorm building, that was for them to know.

—

The paranoia was the first thing to creep into their senses. Before Donnie even processed they were a living being, they had the innate feeling that something was wrong. It rushed through their veins rapidly, urging them to open their eyes and take stock. Unfortunately, that task seemed monumentally more challenging than it should have been. However, if opening their eyes felt challenging, moving any of their limbs was like trying to lift a cement pillar. So they stayed put.

Once their mind felt tethered to their body again, Donnie processed what they could with closed eyes. They deduced that they were laying down, but certainly not anywhere comfortable. The ground beneath Donnie was hard and cold, the comfortable weight of their blanket was missing, which meant it certainly wasn’t their bed. Furthermore, they couldn’t quite remember where their bed even was. The paranoia continued, whispering taunting threats and making Donnie’s skin prickle. Why couldn’t they remember where they were? If Donnie was waking up from sleep, which seemed logical given their closed eyes, why weren’t they in bed? Something was wrong. They needed to open their eyes.

Pealing their eye lids apart felt like opening a window that had been shut for too long. It took some force, but clearly it was meant to be opened, therefore open it will be. The image that greeted Donnie didn’t make their situation any more clear. They were laying on their side in a stairwell, seemingly at the base given there were no more descending stairs. That was weird given the elevators everyone chose to use in the dorms. That thought struck Donnie like lightning. Right, they were at their college. How did they get in the stairwell? Were they supposed to be in class right now?

Before they could try and piece together the incredibly confusing puzzle that was their current position, Donnie finally started receiving physical input from their body again. It was horrible. Every muscle in their body ached, even without moving anything. The pain in their muscles was nothing compared to the pounding in their head though. It felt like someone was taking a hammer to the back of each eyelid, unyielding and impossible to escape or ignore. Donnie’s lunges ached something fierce and that’s when they realized their breaths were too short and erratic. With a gasp, the ability to move their body returned to Donnie suddenly. They used the newly found faculty to curl further into themselves, desperately taking in deep breaths. A small whine echoed through the empty stairwell and tears started to form in Donnie’s eyes, the absolute misery their body was in becoming too much.

A loud beep demanded Donnie’s attention and they looked down to find it had come from the watch on their wrist. They peered at the number on the screen for too long before processing the information. It was a percentage, ninety two percent to be exact. That number was too low considering it was Donnie’s blood oxygen measurement. The beep had been a warning for the decreasing number. Some relief washed through them as it started to creep back up the more Donnie greedily sucked air into their lungs.

They finally took stock of the remaining items around them. Donnie's head was cushioned by their bag, carefully folded up to be somewhat comfortable, and they lay on their side. Next to them on the floor was their phone, face up with an ongoing timer that six minutes and seventeen seconds, and a composition notebook. Donnie’s stomach dropped when they examined the open page of the notebook.

January 8th, 7:03pm- start of seizure aura, setting myself into an appropriate position. I can’t make it back to my room in time, so I’m laying down in the vastly unused stairwell. Post seizure Donnie: don’t panic, you just had a seizure, turn the timer off and record the data.

Donnie numbly reached out to do just that, they would have to subtract some time off. They stared at the sloppy hand writing that was a testament to how they desperately tried to write the information before they lost consciousness. Donnie's eyes widened when the information finally sunk in.

They just had another seizure.

Chapter Text

The five data points seemed to taunt Donnie as they compared them. The first entry, dated as being twenty two days into the school year, lacked the most information seeing as Donnie hadn’t even known they’d had a seizure. Sure, waking up scared and disoriented on a public bathroom floor wasn’t normal for them, but they had chalked it up to passing out due to being overworked. The second data point had significantly more to it, because as soon as Donnie felt something was off they set their phone up to record. 

The video still haunted them. 

It made Donnie sick to watch themselves convulse for thirty two seconds, eyes rolled back and spit trickling out of their mouth. The look of utter fear and confusion as they started to come out of it made them shut their phone off. They moved the cursed thing to their ‘Hidden’ folder on their phone and hadn’t watched it since. 

The seizure the night before in the stairwell marked the longest one so far, and the fifth data point. Donnie could tell this one had been more aggressive, based on how horrible they still felt. All their muscles ached and the headache persisted. The tension in their muscles reminded Donnie of when they did competitive swim and would push too hard at practice. A constant white noise in the background that demanded to be heard with each movement. Exhaustion weighed on them. The complicated mix of emotions that came with a seizure, plus the fear of having another one, kept Donnie up most of the night.

They sighed and closed the notebook, deciding that too much of their time had already been spent worrying about the seizures. Donnie had an appointment with a specialist because, despite what their brothers would say, they weren’t stupid. All of their research had come to the conclusion that random seizures this late in life was concerning. Any seizure was cause for concern truly, but they usually appeared in early adolescence, and some people even grew out of it. If only Donnie’s appointment wasn’t scheduled for almost a year out.

Fuck the American Healthcare System. 

Slipping the notebook into their bag finalized their decision to stop stressing about it for now. Besides, they had much bigger things for their anxiety to feed off of in the current moment. Like the fact that Donnie was waiting for their engineering class to start and supposedly Tim was in this class. The ‘study group’ incident had been two days ago and they hadn't heard a peep from Tim since. Which was good, because Donnie definitely had no interest in hanging out with some random creep from the library, or the Purple Dragons of all people. Obviously they were just worried about lack of interaction with Tim because it meant he was planning something. Or Kendra was. Either way, it wasn’t good. 

It definitely wasn’t because Donnie had enjoyed their time with the group, and Tim specifically. Definitely not. 

“I almost didn’t recognize you when I walked in.” Yet again, Donnie jumped at the sudden voice. At least it was familiar now. 

“It’s like your goal is to give me a heart attack,” they grumbled, turning to the left to reveal Tim settling into the seat next to them. He at least had the decency to look sheepish about his murder attempt. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Oh, I just mean you usually are wearing something purple! Kinda weird to see you in a different color,” Tim responded, gesturing to their hoodie. 

Ah yes, Donnie had forgotten they were wearing Leo’s hoodie. The article of clothing didn’t offer the most physical comfort seeing as the inner lining, once soft and cozy, had become that scratchy texture that told of too many times in the dryer. However, it did offer maximum emotional comfort. It was a common occurrence for the twins to steal each other's clothes, especially their comfort items when upset. So, when the two departed for college, they traded their precious hoodies. 

“So that we can still steal each other's clothes,” Leo had claimed. 

“Scoff, you just want mine because it’s still soft inside.” Despite Donnie’s sass, they had quickly snatched his offering, hugging the hoodie to their chest. 

“What? Nooooo,” Leo’s joking tone sounded forced, a sad glint in his eyes when he looked down at the purple piece of clothing. 

They had never really thought anyone would notice their affinity for the color purple, especially when not put next to their other color coded brothers. So, it felt like a no-brainer to put on the comfort item that morning when Donnie had woken up in pain and stressed. However, Tim was right, the hoodie was a vibrant blue, leaving them distinctly lacking any purple. This boy was observant, that was for sure. 

“Oh yeah, it’s my twins actually,” they said, rubbing the back of their neck and looking away from Tim. “My brothers and I all have our favorite colors that most of our clothes are in, so much so that our dad started calling us by those colors. My twin's color is blue.” 

“Really? That’s cool,” Tim exclaimed, something genuine ringing through his tone. 

Donnie turned back to face him, only to find Tim leaning close with a twinkle of interest in his dark eyes. This close, they could see that he had a splatter of faint freckles that decorated the bridge of his nose. The proximity, and Tim’s hair being pulled back into a bun, also revealed a well kept undercut. Donnie thought of running their hand over the short hair, the satisfying feeling of freshly buzzed head under their fingertips. Distantly, they registered that Tim had said something else, but they were too distracted by the sudden, inexplicable urge to card their fingers through his hair. 

Wait, what? 

“What,” Donnie said out loud, the embarrassment at their own thoughts too intense to simply keep in their head. 

“I just asked what your other brother's colors are,” Tim repeated, looking confused. 

“Oh uhhh.” They were extremely grateful for their dark skin when they felt their cheeks heat up with a blush. If they were any paler, Donnie was certain they would've looked like a tomato. It took embarrassingly long to remember not only the question, but also the answer. “My older brother’s favorite is red, and my younger brother likes orange.” 

“Cool! Are you close with them,” Tim asked. Donnie appreciated the easy topic of their family. It made the task of throwing their, oddly intimate, musings to the back burner to char for life exponentially easier. A small smile tugged at their expression the more Donnie thought about their siblings. 

“Yeah. My older brother, Raph, is the kindest person I know. He’s massive, built like a tank, but a gentle giant.” Their smile turned a little mischievous as they recalled their next tidbit of information. “He used to be scared of this dumb rabbit from a show when we were younger, and we would tease him relentlessly about it. Sometimes putting on the show just to see his reaction. Until our dad made us stop of course.”

Tim chuckled next to them, pulling a snort from Donnie as well. He looked genuinely interested in what they had to say, something they hadn’t experienced in a while. It was hard when everyone mostly kept to themselves in college and Donnie had no pre-established friends. It made them wonder if Tim would continue to listen through one of their infodumps. 

“Do you have any siblings,” Donnie inquired. The infodump thought made them remember that once, when they were little, Donnie’s father had interrupted a rant to remind them a conversation went both ways. A piece of advice that often got them out of awkward situations. 

“Nah, I’m an only child,” Tim responded. “Annoyed way less throughout my childhood, but definitely more lonely.” 

“You can have one of my brothers, I really don’t need three of them.” The comment made Tim giggle with the added bonus of a bright smile sent their way. Donnie decided they liked Tim’s smile. Despite the fact that seemed to be Tim’s default expression, they started making a mental list of how to make him smile. 

“Oh yeah? Which one would you give me,” He teased. 

“That’s easy, you can have my twin. He’s a pain in my ass and it would bring me some peace to finally pawn him off on someone else,” Donnie scoffed. 

“And yet, you’re wearing his hoodie,” Tim mocked, giving them a quizzical look. 

“Shut up,” Donnie said, crossing their arms. He laughed in earnest now and something buzzed in their stomach at being able to pull the sound from him. Before the conversation could continue, the professor entered the room, putting an end to any idle chatter. The world felt a little less lonely with Tim sitting to their left, both quietly scribbling notes. 

—

An hour later found Donnie wincing as they stretched when the class was dismissed. Jeez, their body hurt. The headache they managed to mostly ignore pounded incessantly when they stood up. They pressed their palms into their eye sockets, hoping to alleviate some of the pounding pressure. 

“Are you okay,” Tim asked. When Donnie peaked out from behind their hands, they found Tim slinging his backpack over his shoulder, having stood as well. 

“Yeah, just a little headache.” Half truths were always Donnie's best friend, being the terrible liar they were. Tim gave them a sympathetic look, his brows furrowed in mild concern. Before they had time to dwell on the loss of his smile, he seemed to remember something, snapping and pointing at Donnie. 

“I almost forgot! We’re getting together to study at a local cafe tomorrow, you wanna come?” 

Donnie frowned and moved past Tim, towards the exit of the classroom. They wanted to join the group because they had been extremely productive in the time spent with them. Certainly not because they wanted to hang out with Tim more. Nevertheless, Donnie didn’t have a car and public transportation was hard given how easily they could get overstimulated, which made activities off campus hard to attend. The whole thought process felt too vulnerable though, so they avoided it. 

“Scoff, why would I want to attend another study group when I was promised snacks I didn’t receive,” Donnie said, because brazen sarcasm was easier than admitting their shortcomings. Like not being able to handle a simple crowded bus. 

“Okay, yeah I failed last time,” Tim laughed. He bumped his shoulder into Donnie’s as they walked down the hallway. Surprisingly, the action didn’t make them want to sock him in the face, instead sending a tingly feeling up their arm.  “But hey! This one is at a cafe so there's snacks and coffee!” 

God Donnie missed good coffee. They actually hadn’t left campus since arriving, too anxious to venture out on their own, and they had all the essentials on the school grounds. That included a small ‘grocery store’ the students could shop from. However, the nature of the store meant the stock was limited and name brands weren’t usually available. So they had been left to drink shitty instant coffee for months now. Maybe the overstimulating bus was worth it. 

“I’m already driving the other three so I could totally pick you up from campus! If you want to that is,” Tim commented, cutting off their mental calculations on how much bus they could handle. He was suddenly Donnie’s new favorite person and they could thank him a million times for even suggesting that plan. 

“I think I could be amendable to that,” was what they vocalized instead of groveling at the mans feet. They had their Bad Boy image to uphold after all. Donnie looked up to find Tim beaming at them. All cognitive thought seemed to leave their brain and all at once the world around them was gone, and it was just the two standing in the middle of a hallway that resembled a four way stop. 

“Awesome! What time does your last class end tomorrow?” 

“Three,” Donnie responded automatically. They were still entranced by the look of joy directed solely at them. They didn’t know anyone other than their family could look at them with such an expression and that was only earned when Donnie did something right.

“Cool, I’ll pick you up in the east parking lot around three-fifteen,” Tim responded. Donnie was taken aback when he pulled them in for a hug, though the feeling only lasted a millisecond before they melted into the embrace. Tim was much warmer than Donnie who always seemed to be cold. The moment ended too fast in their opinion, Tim pulling away before they even had the chance to reciprocate, bringing the heat with him. He seemed to realize what he had just done, face lighting up in a blush. 

“Okaytalktoyoulaterbye,” he rushed out before disappearing into the hallway on the left. 

“Bye,” Donnie responded dumbly. The world around them seemed to snap back with harsh clarity and they felt their face heat up. 

What is wrong with me, Donnie thought. They pulled their hood up and scurried off in the direction of their next class. They needed to text Leo. 

—

Donnie set up their laptop so that they were in frame. They waited patiently for their brothers to join the video call, always being the first one there. Donnie had texted Leo earlier that day with a simple, “brother, I think I’m dying”, but weirdly had not received a reply. He usually replied right away, even if he was in class, so they started to wonder if something was wrong. Mikey’s face blinking onto the screen pulled them from the thought. 

“Hi Donnie,” Mikey chirped in greeting. He was set up on the floor in front of the living room couch. Their dad sat behind Mikey, pulling two strands of his hair into a tight twist. 

“Hello Purple,” he spoke up. He put some product in Mikey’s now fully twisted hair. “How are your classes?” 

“Greetings Angelo and papa. My classes are fine, straight A student as always.” 

“That’s my Purple,” their father responded and pride welled in their chest. Donnie would do anything to make their father happy. No seizures or weird feelings about a boy was going to change that. A distant voice could be heard from what Donnie knew was the kitchen, and Splinter perked up at the sound. He patted Mikey’s head before standing and seemingly following the call out of the living room. He left just in time for the last screen to come to life and chaos abruptly erupted. 

“Donnie! What’s wrong?! Why do you think you're dying,” said Raph who was far too close to the screen. Their stomach dropped, the irrational thought that their brothers had found out about the seizures coming to mind. That made no sense though, considering nobody knew about them. 

“Wait what,” Mikey shrieked. 

“Raph, fucking move,” came Leo’s voice. He shoved himself into frame and eyed his twin. “You can’t just…” he trailed off, squinting at Donnie. Leo’s voice was suddenly much more serious when he said, “What’s wrong?” 

“What are you even talking about,” Donnie asked, praying it wasn’t what they thought. 

“You’re wearing my hoodie and you sent me a text that claimed you were dying without any context,” Leo said. “So spill, what’s wrong?” 

“First off,” they sighed, very happy this had nothing to do with the seizures. They definitely should've taken the hoodie off before the call though. “You didn’t get any additional context because you never responded to me, Nardo. Second off, I merely said ‘I think I’m dying.’ It’s only a theory, one in which I needed some outside advice. Hence why I texted you.” 

“How dare you not respond to your twin, Leo,” Mikey butt in, always quick to defend Donnie. Leo had the decency to look guilty, scooting back to allow Raph back into frame. Their oldest brother still looked worried, but far less frantic. 

“Yeah, my bad. It’s been a crazy busy day and I literally just opened your text. That’s why Raph saw it too,” Leo explained. His look hardened though, examining Donnie closely. “That still doesn’t explain the hoodie though. Actually that explains nothing! What’s going on?” 

Shit, Donnie thought. All eyes were on them, making their skin crawl. 

“I procrastinated on laundry and your annoyingly scratchy hoodie was the only clean article of clothing,” they half truthed. Yes, their laundry had been overdue, but they had completed it yesterday. “Where’s April? I only want to explain this once.” 

“Should be here any moment, got caught up doing homework,” Raph explained. There was a sharp knock on Raph's dorm door, announcing their older sisters' arrival. “Speak of the devil and she shall appear.”

“I know for a fact you didn’t just call me the devil,” April said, having let herself in. She took a spot on the floor by Leo, looking towards the camera. “What’s up fam?” 

“Donnie was just about to tell us why they think they're dying,” Leo responded, giving his twin a pointed look. 

“Wait, they think they're dying?" 

“They texted Leo,” Mikey filled in. 

“Sigh, it was simply a joke, kinda. Not really. Anyways, I met this guy.” 

“Dangerous,” April interrupted. “Men suck.” Raph nodded sagely as if he, as a man, could say anything. 

“Says your lesbian ass. You’re literally in a call full of men, well and Donnie,” Leo commented. This is why the family never got anything productive done in these calls, the ADHD tendencies strong within the group. 

“Okay fine, straight men suck. Anyways, you met a guy.”

Before Donnie could even begin speaking their bastard of a twin spoke up. 

“Hold on, is this creepy library guy?” And thus started a barrage of questions. 

“Who’s creepy library guy?” 

"How'd you two meet?”  

“Are you hanging out with him? Why would you do that if he’s creepy?” 

“What’s his actual name?” 

Donnie pinched the bridge of their nose. They could feel the headache they just got rid off coming back. This is why they wanted to text just Leo about it. 

“If all of you would stop interrupting me, I’ll explain everything,” they sighed. It worked, seeing as the call dissolved into silence. “About two and a half weeks ago, a fellow student abruptly approached me in the library. He claimed he had been watching me and that I looked stuck on the project I was working on. He introduced himself as Timothy, Tim for short, and invited me to his study group and offered his expertise for my project.” 

“That was nice of him,” Raph cut in. 

“Um no? That was creepy, he was literally watching Donnie,” April exclaimed. 

“You guys are interrupting again,” Mikey helpfully pointed out. The other two shut up and Donnie continued. 

“I thought it was creepy, which is why I didn’t respond to him for two weeks. However, my dear twin here convinced me to at least check it out. Low and behold, it was actually a very productive and enjoyable time, as well as having the added benefit of getting my project done. Plus it turns out Tim is in my engineering class, so he wasn’t being that creepy after all.” They decided to leave out the part about the Purple Dragons being there. That was a whole different conversation. “The problem arose today in said engineering class. Talking with Tim led to some… bizarre thoughts.” 

“Like,” Leo prompted. He had a shit eating grin on his face, which meant he was up to no good. 

“Like wanting to feel his undercut because it looks fuzzy and satisfying to touch. Or randomly taking note of the freckles he has, which are very hard to see by the way. You have to be very close to him. Oh and anytime he smiled at me, it made my stomach feel weird. And I want to listen to him talk more and learn more about his personal life.” The words spilled out of Donnie’s mouth unwarranted. Once they started talking, they couldn’t stop. “And I want to spend more time with him even though I’ve known him for less than a month. The kicker is, when he touched me I didn’t want to slap him! It actually felt good? Maybe? I don’t know, but I think I’m sick.” 

“Ohmigosh,” Mikey’s voice blessedly cut off their ramblings. “Donnie! You have a crush!” 

Everything seemed to stop for a second. The gears in Donnie’s head grinding to a sudden stop. Imaginary record scratch and all. They had gone so long without feeling romantic attraction for someone Leo and Donnie came to the conclusion they may be aromatic. Leo’s boisterous laughter is what broke the silence. 

“What? T-that’s not possible,” Donnie stuttered. They really had been resigned to the fact that they would be alone forever. Which was truly okay, their 'to-do' list was always long enough to keep them entertained. Aimlessly chasing after a person felt like it would take too much of their time.  

“Hate to break it to you babes, but it sounds like you have a crush on Tim,” April said, a smirk plastered on her face. 

“But I just met him! No, I’m sure I just admire his intellect!” 

“Don-tron, not once did you mention his ‘intellect’ in that little ramble. And admiration doesn’t usually involve physical contact,” Leo stopped laughing long enough to say. 

“At least it sounds like he’s nice,” Raph commented in true oldest brother fashion. He was directing a pitying smile towards Donnie, obviously still finding the situation somewhat amusing. 

This was ridiculous. There was no way in hell Donnie wanted to date Tim! They simply wanted to hang out with him more to pick his brain about car engines and codes, because he was very knowledgeable about the topic. It was thrilling to have a fellow peer teach them about new things, matching their intelligence. It's not like they wanted to be close enough to Tim to count the freckles that adorned his face, or have him hug them again. Maybe he would do it for longer next time, so Donnie could relish in his warmth-

Shit. 

“Noooo,” Donnie whined, dropping their face into their hands. 

Leo’s laughter only continued at their misery. 

Chapter Text

Tim was buzzing with energy when he swung the front door open. The outcome of the day had left him with more excitement than the first time Donnie had agreed to hang out with the group. 

“Guys I have the best news ever,” Tim exclaimed, rushing into the living room. His roommates barely spared him a glance, all too absorbed in whatever they were doing. 

“The EPF is finally going to release all their hidden information on alien races,” Jace asked. For once he wasn’t vigorously typing away on his laptop, instead draped in the armchair, flicking aggressively between their streaming services on the TV. 

“What, no. I don’t even know what the EPF is,” Tim responded. Jace shrugged, finally deciding to open YouTube. 

“It definitely isn't the ‘best news ever’ then.” 

“You’re way too smart to believe that shit, Jace,” Kendra spoke up from the floor. She was sprawled out on the carpet, scrolling through something on her phone. 

“I’m smart enough to know we can’t be the only living organisms in our universe. Why would even have an EPF if aliens didn’t exist.” The conversation was derailing before it had even started and Tim still didn’t know what the EPF was. 

“No, the best news ever is that Donnie’s coming to the cafe with us tomorrow!” 

“Well that’s good considering we’re only going to the cafe for Donnie,” Jeremy commented. “Seeing as I don’t think they’d be comfortable with coming here and can be bribed to do essentially anything with coffee.” 

“Yeah they seemed excited about the cafe part in particular,” Tim mumbled. He couldn’t help but remember the way Donnie had looked at him when he offered to drive. They looked at Tim as if he had hung the stars in the sky, before the expression vanished and Donnie brandished their sarcasm again. It was adorable, Tim had decided. “You guys are not as excited about this as I thought you would be.” 

“Not all of us have a huge crush on Donnie,” Kendra said, smirking at Tim. 

“Ugh, am I being that obvious,” Tim groaned. He flopped onto the back of the couch for dramatic effect. 

He didn’t know how far to go with Donnie, not wanting to scare them off by asking them on a date. However, getting stuck in the friend zone also seemed like a real possibility. Figuring out their mannerisms was like learning a new language and it was as exhilarating as it was terrifying. Tim wanted to figure out their tells, break through that sarcastic barrier they put up, learn everything he possibly could about Donnie, and share his life with them. And hug them again, Tim really wanted to do that too. 

It was just an added bonus he thought they were cute too. 

“Oh he’s down bad guys,” Kendra’s voice brought him out of his thoughts. “He’s blushing just thinking about them.” 

“Shut uuuuup,” Time whined, covering his face. 

“I hate to break it to you, but Donnie doesn’t really do subtlety. You probably just have to be direct and ask them out,” Jeremy pointed out. 

“Yeah but I want to establish more of a friendship with them first. I’m afraid I’ll scare them away if I’m too direct.” 

“You probably will,” Jace, very unhelpfully, supplied. 

“Gee thanks. I did learn more about their brothers today when we talked,” Tim recounted. He chuckled a little when remembering the conversation. “They did offer for their twin to be my brother, since I’m an only child.” 

Kendra snorted. “Yeah that sounds about right. In middle school, Donnie once told a teacher they were gonna sell Leo because he was being annoying.” 

“What else did you guys talk about,” Jeremy asked. 

The question reminded Tim of how the conversation ended. He was naturally a physically affectionate person, so no thought was put into hugging Donnie goodbye. He’d only realized his mistake when he pulled back and found them staring at him blankly. Tim groaned, burying his face in the couch. 

“Oh, he definitely said something embarrassing,” Kendra teased. 

“No, well yes, but no. I didn’t say anything embarrassing, but I may have accidentally hugged them when we were parting ways.” The relentless jokes at his expense he had been expecting never came. Instead, a resounding silence filled the room. He looked up to find all three of his roommates staring at him in surprise. “What?” 

“You initiated physical contact, and you're still alive,” Jeremy was the first to speak up, sounding just as surprised as he looked. 

“Yes?” 

“Dude, in high school, if you so much as brushed against Donnie without permission, they’d like, growl at you,” Kendra explained. “I was afraid of being bit!” 

“They tried to always walk with a brother on both sides, shielding them from the crowds.” Jase rubbed his chin in thought, seemingly remembering something. “But Donnie was always clinging to and hugging their siblings, I mean they all practically used Raph as a jungle gym with how massive he is. They even seemed to be okay with April. So perhaps it’s a person to person basis” 

“They seemed fine with me! A little confused, but no growling or threats,” Tim said. Donnie really hadn’t seemed uncomfortable, but it was hard to tell with how embarrassed he had been. 

Kendra grinned before saying, “I guess you’re one of the chosen ones, Lover Boy. Maybe you do have a chance with them.” 

“And that’s my cue to leave.” 

Tim turned to make his way up the stairs and to his room, leaving behind a snickering Kendra. 

—

Pulling into the east parking lot didn’t immediately reveal Donnie, leaving Tim suddenly worried they had decided not to come. 

“I can’t believe I was kicked to the back, I always get the front seat,” Jeremy said. Him and Kendra sat in the middle row of the mini-van, with Jace in the far back and the passenger seat open for Donnie. The old Dodge van wasn’t Tim’s favorite car, but he found it worked well for carting around his roommates. 

“Front seat is reserved for guests, especially ones Tim wants to fuck. Gotta give them the gold star treatment,” Kendra retorted. 

Before Tim could argue with that, a figure exciting the building caught his attention. Sure enough, Donnie emerged from inside and immediately Tim could feel his face heating up. They wore a pair of long, black overalls with a deep purple sweater underneath. Said sweater matched the color of the bandana tied around their head, hair pulled back in a low ponytail. They looked cute, and he couldn’t help but stare, even as Donnie didn’t spot Tim's car immediately. 

“Oh boy, you better shut your mouth before you start drooling, Lover Boy,” came Kendra’s voice again. She rolled down her window before shouting, “Donnie! Over here!” 

Donnie’s head perked up at the call of their name. They made their way over to the van swiftly, and Tim corrected himself, not wanting to get caught ogling. They came up to Kendra’s window first, but she jerked a thumb to the front seat. 

“You get to be the passenger princess today.” 

“I better be treated like royalty,” Donnie commented before slipping into the seat next to Tim. 

“Consider yourself lucky since I usually get front seat privileges,” Jeremy grumbled, lightly kicking the back of Donnie’s seat. 

“I really don’t think it’s that deep,” Jace finally spoke up from the very back. The three devolved into some back and forth about the importance of car seating, to which Donnie simply rolled their eyes at. 

“Hi,” Tim said when they turned to him. Donnie gave a small smile, reaching for a strand of their hair and twisting it around their finger. He couldn’t help but think the action was endearing. 

“Hi. How are you,” they asked. 

“I’m good,” he responded. Tim pulled out of the school parking lot, starting the short trip to the cafe. “You look nice, by the way.” 

“Oh, uh, thank you,” they said, seemingly not expecting the compliment. 

Donnie brought their hands up to cup their cheeks and Tim thought he saw them smiling brightly, but he was more focused on the road. Before he could take a closer look, Donnie turned to stare out the window, obscuring their face. Which was a shame, considering Tim thought they looked awfully cute at that moment. The car lapsed into silence as Donnie watched the scenery pass by, but it wasn’t long before they spoke up. 

“Where is this place?” 

“It’s like fifteen minutes down the road. I’m surprised you haven’t been, it’s like the go to place for a lot of students,” Tim commented. He had sent Donnie the name of the local business upon their request last night over text. He expected them to have been to the cafe before and recognize it once seeing the name, but it seemed he was wrong. 

“I uh, I live in the dorms and haven’t left campus much,” Donnie explained, sounding a little nervous. 

“Wait you haven’t been here before,” Kendra interjected, clearly done with the pointless conversation from before. “Their coffee is great and the place is open super late for when you’re on a study binge.” 

“Like I said, I live in the dorms and the campus has everything I need. Therefore, I haven’t explored outside of the school much.” 

“Everything you need except for good coffee,” Jace scoffed. “I’m an avid caffeine consumer, but I won't drink the school's disgusting excuse for coffee. You must be so deprived dude.” 

“You have no idea,” Donnie lamented. 

“Oh woe is you, Donnie,” Kendra teased. 

“This doesn’t feel like how royalty is treated,” they responded, twisting to look back at Kendra. “I thought I was supposed to be the princess here. Right Tim?” 

He didn’t hesitate to jump in on the joke, “Oh yes, you should be treating my Passenger Princess with respect.” 

“Bow down to me, peasant,” Donnie exclaimed with a wicked smirk. Kendra matched their energy, learning forward and grinning at them. 

“In your dreams, Forehead.” Tim didn’t understand the context, but the nickname got a reaction from Donnie. They gasped dramatically, clutching their chest. 

“Gasp,” he was starting to love when they vocalized actions like that. “How dare you insult my beautiful face like that! As your princess, this is treason! I order you to be hanged immediately for this crime! Tim, kick her out of the car this instant.”

Luckily, Tim pulled into the cafe parking lot before Donnie could consider throwing Kendra out of a moving vehicle. 

“Okay, no hanging people in my car. Everyone out,” Tim exclaimed. 

“Fine, you’re free this time. But your princess won’t be so merciful next time.” Donnie accompanied the statement with a snooty look, before exiting the car. Tim chuckled lightly when he heard Kendra scoff even as she slid the side door open to follow them. 

The jingle from a small bell above the door is what greeted the group when they stepped into the shop. It was a decent sized cafe, with a cozy cabin feel. Tables were littered around, accompanied by a few large armchairs, but the focal point was three couches that formed a semi circle around a fireplace. Seeing as it was January in New Jersey, aka cold as shit, the stone fixture had a gentle flame lit in its core. A few other patrons lingered around, mostly college students engrossed with their homework, but a large group lingered at the front counter. 

“Kendra, nab the couches,” Jeremy spoke up, pointing to the empty spot in front of the fireplace. “I’ll get your drink, you want the usual?” 

“Yeah, that works,” Kendra said, already starting to make her way over to the groups favorite area to sit. 

The remaining four students joined the short line at the counter to order. Tim glanced down to see Donnie observing the place, seemingly deep in thought. He was about to ask what they thought of the cafe, before one of the students from the large group shrieked and shoved her friend in their direction. He watched Donnie’s whole body go rigid as they eyed the group suspiciously. Tim, who was standing a little behind them, moved discreetly to place himself between the group and Donnie. They seemed to relax marginally, which brought a small smile to Tim’s face. 

Ordering really didn’t take long, and Donnie seemed eager to move away from the group as soon as their large drink was in hand. The heat of the fire was inviting as they all settled on the comfortable furniture. Tim had the pleasure of watching Jeremy’s face scrunch up with mild disgust, eyeing Donnie’s drink. 

“Dude why,” he asked. Donnie simply raised a single eyebrow in question. “It’s like, twenty degrees outside and you’re drinking iced coffee?” 

“Hot coffee is straight people shit,” they said with a shrug. They took a sip of their drink and practically melted into the couch. “Metaphorically, this is the best coffee I've ever had.” 

“Remind me to just get Donnie a caffeinated beverage if I ever piss them off,” Tim teased. Donnie flashed him a smug smile, and Tim felt his neck warm up at the look. Oh that was kinda hot, he thought. 

“You should just be getting me coffee everyday, whether I’m pissed off or not. It’s my god given right.” 

Tim draped his arm over the back of the couch and leaned just a hair closer to Donnie. He smirked as he watched their eyes widen slightly, seeming to subconsciously list further into his space as well. 

“I guess you’ll just have to hang out with me everyday. Y’know, so I can buy you a coffee,” Tim said with a shrug, piling as much nonchalant energy into the statement as possible. Before Donnie could respond, a pencil hit the couch between the two, causing both of them to jump. Tim turned a glare to whoever dared mess up his flirt, only to find Kendra on the couch across the way, giving them an annoyed look. 

“Stop being gay in public, I’m trying to do work over here,” she stated, gesturing to the paper that had appeared in front of her. Jace and Jeremy had also pulled out their work, though they seemed to be favoring snickering at Tim to actually doing the assignments. 

The two pulled away from each other, huddling into their respective corners of the couch instead. Donnie looked to the side, twirling a strand of hair around their finger, very similar to what they had done in the car. They refused to look at Tim and he returned to glaring at a proud looking Kendra. She was shaping out to be a horrible wing man. 

“Can you pass me my pencil, please?” 

“Maybe you shouldn’t have thrown it in the first place,” he grumbled, but tossed the item back to Kendra.

The five settled into silence as they got lost in work, the fire a warm comfort. Tim was enjoying being in their company, even as he struggled through an assignment. Putting aside his crush, Donnie made a great addition to their group and kept up with the banter well. He supposed that made sense though, given they knew his roommates in high school. It was a peaceful enjoyable silence, until Kendra spoke up about halfway into the study session. 

“Sooooo, Donnie,” she said. They looked up at her suspiciously, but didn’t say anything. “Why did you disappear during sophomore year of high school?”

Tim gaped at Kendra. The other two boys occupying the same couch as her turned their heads so fast he was afraid they got whiplash. Donnie had seemed reluctant about the subject three days ago so, despite his curiosity, Tim decidedly wasn’t going to ask. He thought it was an unspoken agreement amongst the group, Jace and Jeremy certainly seemed to get the memo, but obviously Kendra had missed it. Or she just didn't care, that was entirely possible too. Donnie simply stared at her for a second, before sighing and setting down their work. 

“I had to get spinal surgery.” 

Tim had never seen Kendra’s face fall so fast. The smug confidence that she was about to uncover some horrible secret morphed into open surprise rapidly. The four of them stared at Donnie in silence, waiting for them to elaborate. Jeremy was the first to decide it was taking too long. 

“I'm sorry, what?” 

“More specifically spinal fusion surgery,” Donnie merely sighed again, tucking their hands into their lap politely. They looked in the general direction of the three on the other couch, but never actually met anyone's gaze. “I was born with Congenital Scoliosis, the curvature in my spine was pretty severe. One day I woke up in so much pain I couldn’t move and my left leg was numb. That’s when it was decided I needed the surgery.” 

They spoke with a certain detachment, like giving answers on a quiz instead of retelling a traumatic event. He wondered just how many times Donnie had to tell this story. Clearly enough that they had somewhat of a script. It made Tim want to reach for their hand, give a little squeeze of reassurance. He opted not to though. 

“Dude, what the fuck,” was Kendra’s response. “Why didn’t you tell us!” 

“Um, because why would I tell the person that stole my work about my spinal surgery,” Donnie asked incredulously. “And we only made up like, less than a week ago!” 

“Touché,” she grumbled, deflating a little. 

“I’m so sorry, that must have been hard,” Tim butted in. Donnie was really trying to make it seem like this was an easy, casual, conversation for them, but Tim could see past the facade. He saw the way they discreetly pulled on and twisted their fingers, hidden in their lap, or how Donnie wouldn’t meet any of their gazes. 

“Its over now, that’s all that matters,” Donnie said with a shrug. 

“The recovery time for that kind of surgery is long,” Jace spoke up for the first time in a while. “It usually involves lots of Physical Therapy and extremely limited activity. Most patients report still feeling pain even after the surgery.” 

Donnie cringed and it seemed Jace had hit the mark. He was good at that, being quiet for most of the conversation, but adding something insightful that was usually backed by his plethora of knowledge. He was astronomically smart and liked to make sure his contributions showed as much. Except for when he started talking about aliens, Tim still doesn't quite understand that specific interest for him.  

“Yeah, I was bed ridden for a long time and physical therapy was a bitch. That’s why I didn’t come back sophomore year, but it also gave me a lot of time to take online classes. Which helped because I was bored as hell after the first month or so.” They hesitated suddenly, rubbing the back of their neck awkwardly. “I uh, still have chronic pain, but it’s way better than the pain I dealt with before.” 

“Do you have anything that helps with the pain,” Jeremy asked. Donnie unexpectedly looked bashful, a nervous smile stretching across their features. 

“So I definitely have a custom brace I’m supposed to wear and I definitely don’t forget to put it on all the time,” they chuckled nervously. 

That’s when Tim found out Donnie was a terrible liar.  

“Donnie,” he scolded, and they only shrunk further under the scrutiny. “Are you supposed to be wearing it everyday?” 

“It depends, I’m supposed to wear it when the pain gets bad. My issue is I get too caught up in things and forget to put it on and sometimes I don’t realize my back hurts until I’ve already started my day. Or sometimes the pain gets worse throughout the day but I don’t have time to grab the brace,” a sad expression crossed their face, and Tim watched them start to mess with their fingers again. “My brothers used to remind me all the time, so it’s hard to remember without them.” 

“Well,” Kendra started. She was wearing a mock expression of annoyance, leaning back into the couch with her arms crossed. “I guess if you’re too dumb to remember we’ll just have to remind you.” 

“Okay, you’re like the furthest thing away from being dumb possible, but she’s right! No point in being in pain when your friends can help you. I’ll text you every morning if I have to,” Tim added. Donnie looked taken aback for a moment, but they quickly schooled their features, going for a sassy eye roll instead. 

“Scoff, you sound like my dumb dumb twin,” they grumbled, but Tim could see a small smile gracing their features. He decided he liked that smile much more than the sad look they bore earlier. 

He also decided there was no point in denying how 'down bad' he was for them anymore.