Chapter 1: Endometriosis
Summary:
R who has endometriosis gets her period 2 weeks early, and panics when she wakes up soaked. Wanda though, doesn't care, she just cares about R and helping her feel safe and comforted.
Notes:
CW: 18+, Endometriosis, period pain, cramps, emotional, pain, comfort, Chronic Illness, Period Pain, Sensitive Topics (Health/Body-related), Mild Language, Comforting/Healing Themes
Word Count: 2.1k
Reading time: 9 Minutes
Authors note: This was meant to be a drabble, it’s turned out longer…oh well, enjoy! This is mainly Wanda x Reader, but as Nat makes a small appearance at the end I've made it Wandnat x Reader.
Chapter Text
You felt them before you even had a chance to wake up properly, and you knew it—you knew it had come almost a week early—the cramps that felt like you’re insides were being pulled apart bit by bit, twisted, squeezed and yanked until they killed you. Yes maybe it was a bit melodramatic but that’s how they felt. Your fucking period, one of the times you hated with every part of your soul of being a woman.
"Ughhhh!" You groaned, rolling over in the white—not so white sheets “Shit…she’s going to kill me.” Despite Wanda having never once raised her voice with you, not even in arguments, which honestly didn’t happen that much—in fact you don’t even remember the last time you did argue.
Your voice though was already panicked as you sat up and looked between your legs, it was heavy, really heavy. You grunted again, palms flat on your stomach, fingers gripping the loose top that came down to your hips.
“Hey—” Her voice was gentle and light as she stepped in through the door, her part of the bed had been made hours ago when she woke at morning light. She had decided to let you sleep in whilst she tidied up the house, and made some coffee for herself and tea for you.
Now she walked in, her jeans tight against her legs, cream sweater bunched up around her waistband, and the look on her face was full of worry. “Milaya? Everything okay?” Her brows knitted together like she was trying to work out the hardest puzzle known to man—or in this case woman.
Your heart almost tore out your chest at the thought of having to tell her the truth. “Wanda, I—I’m so sorry—I—I didn’t mean to—” your eyes were welling quickly, and she wasn’t standing for it.
She placed the hot mug of tea she had bought up for you on the side, swiftly walking around the bed until she was next to you and she saw. She paused, just for a moment as she looked over you, but she didn’t care that it was heavy and that her sheets were now stained, what she did care about though? Was you. Your pain, how you felt. That was more important to her than any sheets ever could be.
"Okay, here's what we're going to do," she began, and your heart finally stopped exploding inside of you with the worry "we're going to get you into that shower. Whilst you're in there, I'm going to make you breakfast and I shall get some dark towels and put them on the couch with all your favourite things," she sat gently on the edge of the mattress, her hand cupping your face "I'll call Nat get her to bring some extra supplies hmm? This is nothing we can't sort out detka, okay?"
You nodded, too afraid to move.
Again, suddenly, the pain came and you crumbled, body folding in half as you tried to push away the cramps, your head fallng onto Wanda's lap. "It hurts..." You tried not to sound like a dying bird in pain, but an endometriosis flare up were worse than anything else you had experienced medically.
"Shhh, it's okay, I think we have some painkillers left. come on, shower time." Wanda insisted. She hated seeing you in pain, but she always knew a shower helped you feel better, even if it didn't stop the pain.
Wanda carefully stood up, hands around your waist pulling you into a standing position. "Okay?" She asked, never rushing, never pushing you beyond your limits.
You nodded again "I'm okay," you paused before asking her the next question "Uhh can you get Nat to pick up some chocolate?"
Wanda chuckled as you and her began the short but arduous journey to the the bathroom "Of course, can't have you suffering without some chocolate now can we?" she smiled.
Once in the bathroom she sat you on the side of the bathtub, you clung to the side, fingers cirling round the edge as the cramps came again, hitting you heavier than before and the pain keeping you in a hunched over position.
Wanda walked over to the shower, turning it on to that perfect hot temprature you loved it at, not a notch below or above. Wanda always laughed about how boiling hot it was "You're like boiled lobster in this, you're sure this isn't too hot?"
"No, it's perfect," you thought for a second, about how cold Wanda and Nat have their shower in comparison to yours, the though sent a shiver down your spine. Anyway, I thought you liked me as your boiled lobster?" You pouted, it was a bit pathetic, but she nodded testing the water with her palm and stepped back towards you.
"All ready, need some help milaya, or—"
"I'll be fine." You cut her off, not really meaning too. Wanda was not convinced though as she watched you still gripping the side of the bath with one hand and your stomach with the other.
"Hmm...okay, but call if you need anything, I'll leve the door open. I'll bring up some warmed towels for after your shower." Her smile was soft as she tilted her head to the side, a crinkle forming in her forehead with concern.
"Wan—" You began but she cut you off this time, she seemed to always know what you were going to say before even you did.
"No, no arguments sweet girl." Wanda whispered, drying her hand on her jeans. She then pressed her knuckles to your cheek, stroking just lightly before kissing the crown of your head "Go on, I'll be back up in ten minutes."
You finally sighed and agreed "Alright."
"Good girl." Wanda whispered before stepping out the room and leaving you to shower through your pain.
Whilst you were showering Wanda made herself busy. Changed the sheets, set down some fresh clothes for you, warmed up the towels. Then she called Nat.
You could hear the conversatiuon from the bathroom, not that you were taking much notice as you clung to the shower door to keep yourself up right. You knew if Wanda could see you right now, she would be telling you off for not calling her up sooner. But you were stubborn as hell.
Wanda put the tea pot on the stove to boil and Nat answered the phone within two rings.
"Wands? Everything okay?" Nat asked sounding exhasted, panting like she'd just done a workout—which she probably had with the mission she was on, and that should be coming to an end soon.
"Yeah, it's y/n. Her period came early and she's requested chocolate. You're on your way home today right?" Wanda hated to admit it but whenever Nat had to leave even if it was just for a day, she really, really missed her. More than she would ever admit to. Nat wasn't stupid though, she knew this and she felt it too. She missed Wanda with every beat of heart and y/n whenever she was away.
"Yeah, I am now. We'll be leaving in the next hour." Nat sounded drained but satisfied. "I'll pick up some more pads and painkillers too, oh also her microwave lavender bunny is under the coffee table, I moved it last week when I was cleaning. Forgot to put it back." Nat laughed thinking about it.
"Okay, thanks, see you tonight dorogoy. Stay safe." Wanda smiled as she hit end call and turned back to the tea.
She poured out two mugs, and moved them to the coffee table in the lounge. She picked up your Lavender microwave bunny, it was a little old now but it still did the same job it needed to. Wanda loved the smell of it too, and she popped it in the microwave for the two minutes it needed. Whilst that was heating she grabbed the towels from the tumbledryer and went back up to you.
Wanda knocked lightly on the door to find you barely standing, not even having washed your hair yet.
"Oh draga, hey, you should have called me sooner." Wanda set the towels down on the chair, and rushed to your side. "Oh look at you, come on, let me wash your hair and then I'll settle you on the couch. I have made a mug of tea and your lavender bunny is heating up. Nat told me she moved it when cleaning last week."
You looked up at Wanda, eyes wide, like your whole world was collapsing in on it self. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess." you whisper, barely audible.
Wanda rolled up sleeves, her brows knitting together—she immediatley shook her head. "You are not a mess." she said firmly, cupping both your cheeks in the palms of her now shower wet hands. One hand pushing your wet hair back from your face "Look at me draga. You have a chronic illness, this does not make you a mess, it just means things are harder for you. Okay? This does not make you a bad person, or that anything is wrong with you." Wanda took a sharp breath as she kissed the top of your crown "This is why you have Nat and myself. We love you y/n. We don't care how much of a mess, as you put it, are. We love you just as you are."
You nodded, allowing Wanda to turn you round slowly. She began to wash your hair, gentle, calm, massaging the vanilla smelling shampoo into your scalp and through your thick hair. "Can we get some food too?" you asked, suddenly awar of your loud rumbling stomach.
Wanda laughed and nodded "Sure, tell you what," she began now moving to pick up the next bottle, and running the smooth silky conditioner through your locks, smiling contentedly to herself "I'll make you something and then we can get take out tonight when Nats back? What do you think, deal?"
Wanda was always so soft with you, you just could never help melting into her when you heard her talk. "Deal, can I have pancakes? Please?" You fluttered your eyelashes like you were asking for the whole world.
"Sure, pancakes it is." Wanda chuckled, finally turning the water of "anything for my favourite lobster."
The day had felt like it had been months—time seeping into each hour making it longer than it was. You lay on the couch on Wandas stomach, side of your head resting on her chest. Your lavender bunny settling against your own stomach, right where the pain was, it didn't always help and it never took the pain away, but it did enough to make you feel comforted when you felt the most uncomfortable.
Wanda had the curtains closed, the fairy lights dimmed on the blue setting you liked, and the two of you were watching your favorite film waiting for Nat to come home with the take out as well as the other bits you needed to survive the next week—or however long this period was going to last.
Your favorite show was playing as the door unlocked, and Nat stepped in with an tiresome sigh, hands full of the takeout carrier, her own small rucksack and a small plastic bag hanging off the croock of her elbow.
"Hey you two!" Nat smiled, heading into the kitchen to place all the bag on the counter and her rucksack on the ground.
"Hi Moya lyubov, did you manage to get everything?" Wanda asked, running her fingers through your hair as you were beginning to drift off finally.
Nat came over, kissing the top of Wandas head staying for a moment longer than either expected. "Yeah, I got her the painkillers, pads, chocolate she wanted and I picked up the chinese food. I'll plate hers up and she can warm it up when she's ready."
"Mmm," you mumbled "want it now." you said sleepily, eyes still not quite opening at the sound of Nats voice "we missed you."
Nat crouched down in front of you, hand settling on the side of your face. Her heart filling with so much love watching you lay on Wanda, curled up just trying to get through the pain—your flare up and Wanda having never left your side, not once.
"You sure milaya devochka? You can rest and you can warm it later," Nat whispered, knuckles stroking gently over your warm skin, but you shook your head making both Nat and Wanda laugh a little "Alright, sit up then, and I'll plate everything up. I even got you a Dr. Pepper, your favorite."
You moved slowly off Wandas lap, lavender bunny still sat against your tummy.
You took the painkillers Nat had bought you, and ate the take out with the two of them sat on either side of you, and once you all had finsihed Nat turned to you and whispered "As it happens devochka, I missed you too," Nats eyes flickered to Wanda, who smiled back at her "And you too lyubov'"
"Good, because you are never going away for that long again."
"It was two days hardly long Wands." Nat laughed, Wanda was making out like she had been away for months at a time, which okay, yes on previous missions that has been the case. This one though? This was just a couple of days, a quick round trip and she was back in the warmth of her own home with her wife and you.
"Shush. It was long—at least long enough." Wanda huffed, settling back into the couch and the two of them wrapped an arm each around you, as you settled into their cozy warmth and your lavender bunny sat, still warm against your stomach.
Chapter 2: The Party
Summary:
At a high-profile party, you find yourself the target of cruel judgment for being autistic — but you’re not alone. With love, courage, and quiet power, you stand tall in the face of ableism and walk out stronger than ever.
Notes:
CW: Ableism (overt and implied – includes demeaning language, mockery of autistic traits, and verbal attacks based on disability), Verbal Bullying and Harassment, Social Anxiety and Sensory Overload, Public Humiliation, Confrontation Anxiety, Alcohol Use (by protagonist to cope with nerves), Emotional Distress, mentions of crying, Shutdown response, Mentions of Psychiatric Institutions and Institutionalization (used as an insult), Mild Language, Swearing, Discrimination and Prejudice (based on neurodivergence and appearance)
Word count: 2.4K
Reading time: 12 Minutes
Authors note: This piece is incredibly personal to me. It’s inspired by a real situation I went through last year — one that left me feeling small, misunderstood, and out of place for simply existing as my autistic self in a space that didn’t feel safe. Writing this was healing.
The character of Isabella is an original character, created specifically for this story, and while this features familiar faces from the Marvel universe, the focus is on how they respond to someone cruel targeting a vulnerable person.
Also Steve's vibe in this is very much of I want to do the right thing but I’m also scared of the angry lesbians. Classic Steve.
Chapter Text
The party was loud, glasses were clinking, chatter above a noise you were barely able to deal with, and music just as loud. You stood in the corner of the room, hand gripping your glass like it was the only thing tethering you to the safety of the ground beneath your feet, and in someways it was.
You bounced awkwardly-subtly from one foot to the other, whilst one hand was twisting in the hem of your dress, the other pressing on your lower stomach, keeping you steady-still making sure to not drop the fragile glass. Your eyes laser focussed on the liquid inside the, watching it swirl, before flicking up to where they were.
Wanda and Natasha. Two women who had made you feel safe, comforted and a joy to be around more times than you could say. They loved you.
Wanda and Nat stood chatting to Agatha, Rio and Steve, and one other woman you didn't recognise. She was dressed to the nines, blonde hair scraped back, with a diamond clip to keep it together, red dress down to her knees and black heels, higher than even Wanda or Nat would ever be seen it. You watched carefully as her eyes kept looking towards you-but not your face, to your shoes.
The two of them hadn't noticed the looks. It wasn't one of intrigue or kindness. It was one of judgement, because you weren't wearing any high class heels like she was, in fact you weren't wearing heels at all. You'd got into a bit of a meltdown before leaving because your shoes—the heels you were going to wear, they felt wrong on every level no matter how you wore them. With socks, without, or with Padded insoles. Nothing helped.
When Nat had bought over your white converse shoes, with the pretty sunflowers on the inside, and Winnie the Pooh and friends on the outside, the cute little stars and moons beads threaded into the laces, you were hesitant to accept them.
"I can't" you had said voice shaky, recovering from the crying that had ensued for the last forty minutes.
"Why not? because they're not heels? They're your comfy shoes, you said they felt like slippers, so wear the proudly detka. Be you." Wanda had said it gently as she slid the shoes onto your white socked feet, with the little frills at the top. They made you happy. And Nat reminded you it was okay to wear the things that brought you joy, even when going to a fancy work event.
Nat had even helped you into a dress that colour matched your shoes—a beautiful white dress, with intercret detail of pink and white blossom flowers stitched onto the dress, one that wasn't itchy material, in fact it was delicate almost silk like, and hugged your figure like a warm hug.
You could hear the laughter from across the room. Nat, Wanda, Agatha, Rio, Steve - and the woman who hadn't taken her eyes off your shoes. Gods it was becoming unbearable, it was like a fire crawling up your spine, and more than anything you wanted to run, but you didn't. You stayed gripping your glass, continuing to bounce as the woman looked you up and down like you were an inconvinece at the party.
Wanda laughed loudly and it sparked your nerves hitting your dopamine levels and bringing you a level of joy you couldn't quite comprehend. You hadn't even noticed Wanda and Nat had both seen what was happening, they wanted to see what would happen next not to make you uncomfortable but to make her uncomfortable, because they did not like her, there was something off about her and then you heard it...the womans words left her throat like a nasty bite.
"I'm sorry to interrupt," voice like thin ice digging into every crook "but who is that girl? God how could she turn up looking like that? It's shameful."
"Actually," Steve began but Nat grabbed his arm, shaking her head at him.
"Go on Isabella was it? Do share your grievances about the young girl who is simply keeping to herself and drinking her wine." Nat asked, saying it in a tone that wasn't snapping, no it was calm, almost curious. But of course, inside, she was burning with rage.
Isabella was unaware of the relationship between yourself and the rest of them, so she wasn't going to hold back when speaking. "Well, come on. This is a fancy party and we're all dressed up nicely, in heels and proper dresses, and she's in... that? Childish Converse shoes with Winnie the Pooh? What is she, four? I mean-" She laughed. A sharp, forced kind of laugh. "You can't help but laugh, really."
Her whole wording was ridiculous. Honestly, she was at a party with actual super spies, witches, and a dude who fought Thanos - and this was the battle she chose to start? Agatha was looking from Wanda and Nat towards the woman, wondering who was going to snap first.
"You can help it, you're just choosing to be cruel behind her back." Wanda's hand was down beside her thigh, red magic floating through her fingers. Nat's hand gripped Wanda's wrist, a subtle way to steady her wife, grounding her in the moment and stopping her from blowing the entire building to smithereens.
"Well, what's it matter to you anyway? You don't seriously care about people like that? I mean, would you just look at the girl?" Isabella sneered, tone thick with disgust. "You'd think someone like that would know better than to come to a professional party like this. I don't believe for a second she works with any of you, that's just impossible. look at her for fucks sake, the way she's bouncing on her feet, wearing headphones, that match her shoes. Yuk. She shouldn't be allowed here. Was this some kind of pity invite for a charity case?" She laughed like it was a punchline, that no one else understood. "People like that don't belong in beautiful places like this."
"Oh?" Natasha asked through gritted teeth, her voice sharp and low. Her fingers tightened on Wanda's wrist, anchoring them both, willing the magic not to ignite. "Where do they belong, then? Do tell us doctor?"
"She belongs in an ugly place, a psychiatric unit will do," Isabella said, choking on her laughter. "And never be let out again. That's where."
"Excuse me will you, I can't listen to another moment of this abelism." Wanda removed her wrist from Nats and slowly, taking a deep breath walked towards you.
"Hi bug, how you doing?"
"Okay." You whispered, not wanting to let on how overwhelmed you really where.
"Detka...the truth." Wanda placed an arm around your shoulder, and her hand on your chin pulling your face up towards her "What's going on?"
You sighed, eyes watery from the relief of Wanda "That woman, the blonde, she keeps giving me dirty looks and maybe I'm over reacting but it's...it make me feel icky, and it smells weird in here."
"Okay, well would you like to leave?" Wanda asked, hand still firmly on your chin, keeping eye contact to continue to esure you feel centred in a room where you don't feel that.
"Please. Although I'll finish my drink first if that's okay?"
Wanda giggled slightly "Of course detka," she smile leaning forward and pressing her lips to your forehead,
"now I want to introduce to someone, but she's not a nice lady, in fact she's awful, but I want her to see the kind and beautiful soul that you are. Just stick by me and Nat okay? Then we'll be out of here."
You nodded, apprehensive as Wanda turned grabbing your hand, pulling you towards the group where Natasha Romanoff looked as if she was about to blow.
Agatha and Rio were watching like it was a performance of shakspeare, and Steve looked like he wanted to either punch Isabella or let the ground swallow him up.
"Isabella, if you-"
"NAT!" Wanda shouted louder than she had meant, her voice echoed thorugh the hall, and every single person went silent as the building rumbled.
Nat gave Wanda a glare, but nothing compared to the one that was shot back at her, making her pull back.
Wanda walked over and placed you between the two of them as she looked towards Isabella, arm over your shoulders, Nats hand in yours.
Silence.
"Oh?" Wanda laughed, smirking eyes focussed on Isabella "Nothing to say now I have bought her over? Funny that."
"What's the point in this Wanda?" Isabella asked, almost dissmisive of the whole thing, but Wanda? She wasn't go to let this rest. Isabella started it, but Wanda was about to finish it.
"Because I want you to see the amazing, incredible, intelectual person you have just stepped on with your words. For she may keep to herself, she may where headphones or converse shoes for comfort, but that doesn't take away from who she is. She just...is different, and people like you can't stand people who are openly differnt. But me and Nat? And Steve and even these weirdos..." Wanda nodded towards the two gawping at them like a show "Even they are love who she is, because this is what love looks like, how can you put someone down, even nehind their back, who finds joy in the little things?"
"That's not-oh come on, Agatha, Rio, surely you don't agree-" Isabella was trying, but it was no use, no one would be on her side, not with this.
"You're an abelist asshole, so don't really think anyone in this room will be on your side? You should leave, and thank yourself lucky no one has punched you, or better yet that Wanda hasn't torn this whole building down." Agatha said it with such a conviction, it even surprised Wanda herself.
Wanda smiled softly at Agatha, mouthing a small thank you in her direction. "Look Isabella, this girl, this beautiful, wonderful girl, with the headphone and Winnie the Pooh Converse shoes has a full on master degree…and is getting her doctorate. Not that a degree should me that's she's suddenly acceptable to you. It sadness me that you think like this."
"Wait, can I say something." You look up at Wanda and passed your now empty glass to Steve who took it happily.
"Always detka." Nat whispered "you never have to ask permission, you know that."
"Now this is pathetic." Isabella rolled her eyes, sipping her wine like she was bored.
"No, it's polite…something you wouldn't know anything about." Nat snapped,you felt her hand tightening around your own, and you realise in the moment just how much you all needed to get out of here. It wasn't just you who needed to escape.
"Now let the little bug speak, or are you too stuck up for that too?" Steve said, instinctively protective of you, they all were.
"Bug? Ugh, don't tell me that's your name?" She asked you but didn't even look at you.
"Hey!" You snapped your fingers at her, which gave everyone else a little laugh "I'm over here, not at the bar. I'm autistic and if I can look at you then you can do me the courtesy of looking at me at when you're talking to me." You took a breath, feeling Wandas hand on the small of your back, helped you to feel calm, and understood. "I know you don't like me. You don't even know me and you've already made an opinion of me, because what? Because I wear converse shoes with Winnie the Pooh on because they give me not just comfort but joy? Because I'm not wearing a red dress that fits too tight to your body? I wear one that Nat hand sewed for me, making sure the material was perfect so I wouldn't be uncomfortable, or is the headphones? Loud noises make me crumble in a corner, so you're mad that using them makes me able to function? It's funny. I've just realised who you are. You really think because you own the building…that you get to be nasty and cruel, and that you're better than everyone else, well guess what princess, you're not."
"Oh and who is? You?"
You just laughed in disbelief "No. listen to me when I say this. Not one person is better than another, we're all just…different."
Wanda and Nat stood proudly next to you as you had tore Isabella a new one. Nat had managed to stop herself from punching out the woman, and Wanda with Nats help had avoided a full scale building collapse.
"Come on bug, let's get you home, comfy pjs, hot cocoa and a film." Nat said, arms wrapped around you, feeling the way you're shoulders finally relaxed after that confontation.
"Yeah, let's go before I start crying." You whispered so only they could hear.
Wanda took your hand gently, Nat squeezed at your shoulder walking you all away from the crowd. Body silently shaking even with their presence, because confrontation makes you so incredibly anxious and uncomfortable that you usually avoid it like the plague.
You had however drunk four glasses of wine in less than an hour — alcohol is very good at making you speak the truth wether you want to or not. Your body was still catching up to what had happened.
Steve, Agatha, Rio and Isabella watch you walk out the room, safe in the arms of two beautiful women. Three of them happy that you were safe away from that horrible woman. Isabella should count her stars that she didn't have ever Avenger on her case as well as Agatha Harkness and death her self.
"Lucky little bug." Steve whispered.
"The luckiest." Agatha agreed.
"That was no need for the dramatics though." Isabella said.
"Oh shut the fuck up would you!" Rio snapped "I'm literally death. I'm fed up of hearing you whine, a moan about someone's comfort. Stuck up cow. Come on Ags, let's go, Cap you coming?" Rio looked at him,eyes narrowing as her hand slid into Agatha's.
"Sure am." Steve nodded, still gripping your glass from earlier, and following Agatha and Rio towards the bar, the noise at the party not as loud.
And just like that. Isabella, the most judgmental woman who had come to the party, was left all alone with her bigoted, ableist thoughts.
From the bar, Agatha, Rio, Steve and now Pepper, Watch Isabella carefully, a woman who had been socially obliterated by the autistic woman she tried to tear down and break behind her back. But you had a family, you had people who loved and cared for you—Isabella was standing alone in a crowded room from nothing but her own making.
Chapter 3: Sleepless Nighta
Summary:
After weeks of sleepless nights and sensory overload, you finally break down in the quiet hours of the morning.
Notes:
CW: 18+, Sensory overload, overstimulation, insomnia, discussion of autistic experiences, mild swearing, mentions of self-neglect due to lack of sleep, brief frustration/raised voices (resolved quickly), soft angst, domestic fluff, neurodivergent reader.
Word count: 5.6k
Reading time: 28 Minutes
Authors Note: I had to write this after I have had really bad sleep for the last few months, and if only I had a Wanda and Nat to help me through it.
Chapter Text
God it was like being in a nightmare but awake.
The sheets underneath you felt scratchy. The hum of the fridge from downstairs was at a noise louder than a child's scream. You could hear the electricity pulsing through the plug socket. And Nat? Lovely, kind, warm Nat. She was snoring, and you'd already had one or two thoughts about smothering her with a pillow with Wanda laying on your other side.
Everything felt too much. Too hot. Too cold. Too bright. Too dark. Too Loud. Too Quiet. And now you had that god damn song going round and round your head like a god damn carousel. You hated carousels. And you hated the song.
I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation
Come on Barbie, let's go party
And it started again. You may not be smothering Nat with the pillow tonight—you might however, be smothering yourself if it means shutting off your brain for the night.
"Ughhhhh…." You groaned into you bunny.
You didn't care that you were 31 and still slept with your stuffed Bunny, and neither did they, in fact in kind of way, they actually admired you for it which at the time surprised you. You could not understand how anyone could be admired for sleeping with their childhood stuffie, but it wasn't about the bunny—it was about the fact you were yourself, without fear, without pretending to be someone you weren't you came as yourself, no pretending, not faking. Just you. Their little bug.
You rolled your head over towards Nat, eyes drilling a hole into the back of her red hair. If she would just shut up with the snoring for five minutes it could be enough that you would actually be able to sleep. You turned your head towards the left, to Wanda who was facing you, her red hair falling messily around her face, but she was peaceful and not snoring, which was one thing you were thankful for in this moment.
You then saw her watch on her wrist, she usually takes it of at night but Wanda had been so exhausted when the three of you fell into bed she had obviously forgotten,—even so, your eye checked, and you groaned when you saw the time.
"4.a.m. You have got to be kidding me." You muttered into the atmosphere.
You let out another exagerated sigh, because now you could hear the clock ticking from down stairs. You were done. That was enough to send anyone spiraling.
The scratching in yout brain was becoming more irritable by the second and finally you decided to leave the bed. You placed your bunny against the pillow where you head had been, pulling your legs out from under the covers to not disturb Nat or Wanda, crawling down to the end of the bed and jumping lightly of the edge yntil you feet hit the tiles. You paused hearing Wanda move closer Nat, but thankfully she didn't wake.
You held your hands over your duckie cotton pjs, taking a deep breath trying to figure out if going downstairs and making yourself a drink would be better or opening the window here would be the right decision. If you went downstairs you'd be closer to the noise…and that was what salidified your decision. You were not going closer to the noise.
The fresh air was calling to you, so you stepped forward, tiptoeing towards the window. Your hands trailed along the edge before you pulled it up, the air burst through the now open window and into the dark room, where Nat was still sleeping and snoring.
"Nat please…." You muttered, begging from under your breath. Then you finally put your head out into the fresh air, eyes shutting as you felt the cool air kiss your skin, hands gripping the ledge and then a soft twit-twoo, the sopund always danced on your soul in the moonlight.
The air on your warm skin felt like relief in a single moment. No more noise, no more scratchy seats, even Nats snoring had somehow lowered, still there but not grating on your skin like before.
In fact you were so focussed on the fresh air, the smell of rain, which meant a storm was on its way and the hooting owl that you finally spotted perched in a high tree across the way, that you dind't hear the rustle of the sheets, Wanda's groan as she woke, or her gentle footsteps on the wooden floor padding her way towards you.
Wanda's hand reached forward pressing on the low of you back gently, so to not startle you, but it did—you jumped, head hitting the top pf the window as you turned to see Wanda standing there in the moonlight, wearing her red silk pjs.
"Oh, Detka, I'm sorry bug, I didn't mean to frighten you." Her hand reached up to yhe back of your head pulling you back into the room.
"No, it's okay, I was just—I don't know." You whispered, eyes flicking back to the owl, who had no vanished into the night.
"Bug, what's going on?" Wanda asked, wrapping her arm around your shoulder and pulling you in closer. She saw the way your head turned towards a spread out, starfished, snoring, dribbling Nat, with half her body falling off the bed. "Ahh, her snoring keeping you awake again?" Wanda asked as she moved over to where Nat was, pulling her fallen leg and arm back under the covers and her fingers pushed back the red messy hair, lips finding her forehead as she kissed her softly. "Sleep love."
You stood watching the the image unfold into the most beautiful historical painting you had ever seen. This was soemthing you would happily go and see in museum, maybe if oneday there was a museum specifically for the sapphics, that's where this image of these two women would be.
Wanda smiled sweetly down at her wife, and with the corner of her sleeve wiped the drool from Nats mouth making her choke slightly on the snore, before continuing at her normal snoring rhythm. Both you and Wanda laughed lightly at the sound.
"Okay Bug, lets go downstairs, make a warm drink and you can tell me what's wrong? I'll even watch Lord of the rings with you if you want?"
"Okay, but only if it's the first hobbit film instead." You smirked, chewing on your own sleeve, as your other hand twisted in the hem of your pyjama bottoms, holding tight, twisting the material hard round each individual finger, until Wanda came back over to you and took your hand in hers.
"None of that now, come on baby, lets go." Wanda gripped your hand tight, not to the point of loss of circulation but tight enough that you wouldn't be able to let go and feel safe and comforted all at once.
By the time you reached the kitched her hand had left yours and she was pushing her own long, brown hair up into a bun atop her head.She pulled out a chair at the kitchen island, patting the soft material. "Sit." And you did. Without argument of fanfare, you jumped right up there in your duckie pajamas and bare feet and watched Wanda with the most adoration, as Wanda did with you too.
She stood at the back of the chair, hands on your shoulders squeezing gently "Take a deep breath." she fellt your lungs expand as she breathed in and out slowly and her magic swirled around you. Breathing suddenly became easier, your mind was no lonnger overwhelmed, but those god damn noises were still going—until silence. And you wanted to cry from the releif.
Wanda felt your shoulders relax under her touch, and the sigh of exhastion leave your lips as her red magic pressed in on your brain and the rest of your body centering you. You moved closer, her head next to yours, lips touching your cheek and lingering for as long as she could without making you incomfortable. "Now, how about hot cocoa and conamon with some vegan whipped cream?"
You nodded, words still not quite capable of coming out in full sentences yet.
"Good girl." Wanda smiled, walking over to the cupboard and pulling out your favourite pumpkin mug, ridged around the edges, autumn leave lumpy around the side of the mug.
As Wanda made the drinks, humming an old Sokovia lullaby, one that always gave you comfort in the dead of night and one that she never even realised she was humming until it was pointed out—which no one did, not anymore. But the sound made your own heart sing.
Your hand began a gentle tap, tap, tap, tap on the counter as you watched Wanda, now on the finaly piece of the hot cocoa puzzle, whippped cream—she stopped and went to put the lid on the can until—
"More please." You whispered into the night air.
Wanda laughed, looking over her shoulder with a raised brow "More? Bug, if I put on anymore it's not going to stand up."
"Pleaseeee." You begged, in the tone you knew she couldn't resist not even for a minute.
Wanda just giggled to herself. "Fine, but don't blame me when you start looking like a can of whipped cream."
"You'd be able to lick me clean." You tease, and Wanda just shaked her head in a comedic disbelief.
"And I bet you'd taste delicious moya lyubov." Wanda continued the hum, silently adding just and extra more into your mug. She then grabbed a small tea sppon and squirted some onto the rainbow metal, walking over to you, she held your chin gently in her hand. "Open."
And you did, without hesitation, already smelling the creamyness of the whipped cream and the cinnamon that was beginnning to woft towards you. Her eyes watched your lips carefully as they seperated and she slid the spoon into your mouth, your lips pressing on the sppon gently and she pulled it free letting the cream settle onto your tounge.
"How's that?" Wanda asked as if she didn't already know your answer.
"Mmm, good." You nodded, and it was good, it was more than good—it was delicious in a way that made you think of art.
"Good?" She question, hand still holding your chin in the msot loveable and caring way she could.
"Okay, incredible, I want to bathe in the whipped cream."
"Alright my little sass bug." She laughed at your over exagerated description. "Right, why don't you tell me why you're away at four—almost five in the morning detka? hmm?" Wandas gentl touch was something that always warmed your heart, the way her pressence alone made you feel safe. Her fingers left your chin and reach for the stray hair, curling around your cheek in a bounce and she pulled on it subtly before tuckling it behind your small, delicate ear.
You waited for her to bring the mugs over, your fingers now tapping against your thigh, pulling slightly ay the materil of your top. Wanda placed your pumpkin mug with a mountain of whipped cream and two cinnamon sticks only just poking through the cloud in front of you on the island. Her warm herbal tea next to it, that you once told her tasted like a 'groggy marsh' your not even sure you knew what you meant when you said it—but the sentiment was all the same, it tasted foul. But Wanda, for some bizare reason, found it delicious.
Wandas hand moved to either side of your chair and she twisted your ound so you'd be face to face with her. She jumped up onto her own seat, settling in incely tapping her bare, red painted toes that Nat had done the night before agaimst the top of your own bare food, nudging you towards the cocoa.
You took a sip—well more of monster bite out of the fluffy whipped cream, you looked like the hulk trying to eat something that a fairy had offered. It was indescribable, but god it made Wandas face crumple up, nose twitch, as she tried to hold back her snorting laugh, that had caught in her throat before she stopped it coming out in full force.
Wanda took a sip of her own tea, as she watched you now tak in the actual cocoa through the whipped cream cloud. Once you had both had a few slurps to get you settle at this time of the morning, you placed you mugs back on the island and Wanda watched you, here eyes looking into every small detail of your face, every crease, every freckle, every small movement that had her asking herself if you were okay.
"Love bug? talk to me?" She whispered in the early sunlight as the clock chimed five, her hand reaching for yours and squeezing, but never once letting go or making you feel any kind of pressure to talk. She would, if you wanted to, just sit here in silence, with the thoughts of one another filling up the stolen air of the night.
You looked into her eyes, seeing the intentions, the very purpose of the crinkle in her brow. She was genuinely worried, and you could say nothing was wrong, but you were past that point now. It was too obvious to Wanda and it would be to Nat too, that you were not yourself.
"I—" you began, and Wanda waited, keeping hold of your hand, the patience of her was exactly what you need in this moment. "I couldn't sleep." You said like it wasn't the most evident thing in the world.
"No shit sherlock." Wandas laugh dropped out her mouth like mud thick in the rain. "Sorry Bug, it's just clearly you couldn't sleep with the fact we are sitting in the kitchen at five in the morning and—" Wanda paused, eyes darting towards the ceiling as she heard a creak—at least she thought she did "that could be Nat, carry on malysh, she'll come find us if she wants to."
You nodded in response, hearing the grunts and groans of Nats, and the slow creaking floorboards above you—but you continued.
"I couldn't sleep—" you saw the look on Wandas voice and you nodded, a subtle smile pulling at your lips "yeah I know, I already said that, but listen, I couldn't sleep because I could hear the living room clock ticking from where we sleep, as well as the hum of the god damn fridge, then I could hear the electricity running through the plug socket, the sheets where too scratchy, I was too hot, then too cold and…" Your ears pricked up hearing footseps on the stairs "Nats snoring. I love her but christ, I wanted to smother her and then myself Wanda! It's complete overhwhelm—overstimulation, I don't know what but it's too much to the point I can't sleep and makes me want to cry in the same breath."
"Hey, look at me," Wanda jumped down of her seat stepping forwars, her hands moving to your cheeks and holding you still, forcing eye contact "Look at me." And you did, you looked into her eyes, watching as she begged for you to hear her. "You hear things on a level other people can't, I know you get told that being autistic is a superpower and this is what I think people mean by it, but it doesn't mean it is, not for you. Your autism doesn't make you feel good and that is okay darling, but you can't keep this to yourself."
"Well what do you expect me to do? Wake you at four in the morning?" You muttered, irriatted at the very thought.
"Yes."
"Yes"
You frowned hearing the second voice, but you saw Wanda's eyes smile as she looked over your shoulder, in which you now turned your head, and there standing in matching duckie pajamas—was Nat.
"I—I can't just wake you up—that's not—" You stumbled over your words, not even sure how you were planning on finishing that sentence.
"Not what detka? Not fair? not how we do things?" Nat frowned, trying to figure out what you were really thinking. “And why isn’t it?” Nat asked stepping next to you, and placing a hand on the small of your back.
“Because—because—it just is! We can’t all be exhausted, I can deal—”
“Whoa. Wait a moment, exhausted?” Nat moved, her fingers grabbing your chin tight and forcing you to look at her now, “how long have you not been sleeping?”
You looked to Wanda for—help maybe? But even if she was still sat in front of you, she wiuldn’t have helped. You’re on your own with Nat.
Wanda was now up, grabbing something from the side “I’ll go grab your bunny and i’ll sort out the film, whilst you two…chat.” and before you could even argue, she walked slowly out the kitchen, brown hair bouncing against her back, smiling back at you with a small nod before she was out of sight. You could hear the gentle Slovakian humming echoing throughout the house as she climbed up the creaky staircase.
“Look at me. Not Wanda. Me bug. What’s going on? How long haven’t you been sleeping for” her finger held your chin firm, making sure you were focused on her and only her—at least for this moment.
“What's it matter? It's not big deal!” You snapped, voice like stones against a brick wall.
“No, we’re not doing this. You can stop that right now, i’m not having it.” Nat snapped, but she saw you flinch and automatically softened her face, along with her voice “I’m sorry bug. I didn’t mean to be so loud, or sharp.” Nat took a breath before she continued “Listen to me, it is a big deal. A very big deal. Wanda and I love you so much, but if you don’t talk to us, don’t tell us we can’t help you and we will stop trusting you. Is that really what you want?” Nats voice more like honey than glass now, and she finally let her fingers fall from your chin.
Your sleeve quickly found its way into your mouth chewing lightly, as you shook your head “No, but—”
Nats hand reached for your wet sleeve, pulling it from your mouth. “I can’t hear you with your mouth full of dickie pajamas. And there’s no buts. This is how it is, so tell me the truth.”
You looked up at Nat and what you saw in her eyes—her face, it wasn’t anger, not even frustration. It was utter concern for your wellbeing.
“Okay.” You whispered, turning your head away “the truth, I’ve not slept properly for over a month.”
“A MONTH?!” Nat took a breath, hand on her own stomach, “sorry love bug. But a month sweetpea? This isn’t good.”
You just shrugged, not because you didn’t care but because you were just used to it. The going to bed. Hearing all the noises throughout the house until you couldn’t take it any longer and you had to climb out of bed.
“Wait a minute is this why I’ve been finding you asleep on the bedroom or bathroom fooor, or when yoi’re eating breakfast.” Nats expression was full of concern, her hands holding your face warmly in her hands “oh bug.”
You nodded reluctently, you knew she wasn’t mad at you but your stomach twisted, the knowledge of having just tried to pretend everything was fine when it clearly wasn’t, pulled at you like walking on a tigherope. It made you feel sick and Nat saw.
“Okay, here’s what’s going to happen.” She began hands still firmly on your face “take a deep breath for me, you are not in trouble. So with me bug, one, two, three and out, one, two, three. Thats it. Now how about, you, me and Wanda go and settle on the couch with these warm drink and watch The hobbit, how does that sound, and we will try and get you to sleep?”
You nodded, eyes shutting a little, exhausted and runnning almost on empty.
“Okay, that my good girl. Now anything else you want to tell me?” Nat asked, and you knew what she meant, she pushing for you to tell her about her snoring, because telling her means she can actually do something about it.
You fingers twisted back in the hem of your pants, grounding you in a way nothing else could, eyes glistening with sleep as you looked up at her, and then—Wanda was back. She stood in the door way arms crossed, your Bunny being strangled in the crook of her elbow, one ankle crossed over the other and leaning against the door fram with an elegance that you didn’t see in anyone other than her, or Nat, and a small smile fitted to her lips, nodding towards you as if to say ‘go on you can do it.’
You looked from Wanda, over your shoulder and back to Nat “Just the noise, I’m sure I’ll be fine, I’ll get there, I can’t sleep because of the noises—”
“No, that’s not it,” Nat paused, moving her hands from your face and down to your thighs, just gently resting them and pulling your hand free from the hem of your pants. “I know sometimes it’s hard for you to ask for help even on things that to the rest of us don’t seem like a big deal, but for you they are and I will sit with you until you’re ready. I can’t help if you though, not if you don’t ask me bug.” Nat pushed further, not to be mean, but so you understood that this didn’t need to be scary, asking for help never needed to be uncomfortable.
“Okay, okay, I can say this, but Nat,” you took a deep, slow breath, shutting your eyes for a moment before whispering into the cool air of the kitchen glowing in the light of the sun rise. “don’t hate me—”
Nat was never going to let you think that for even a second, her eyes shifted to Wanda who wass till stood against the door frame, smiling softly. Nat came back to you “No Bug, just no. I could never ever hate you, not ever. Understand?”
You nodded “You snore.” you blurted it out like the easiest thing in the world after stressing about telling her for the last ten minutes.
Wanda let out an almost strangled laugh.
“You, shut up!” Nat glared over at her wife.
“She’s not wrong moya lyubov. Before we came downstairs you were snoring like a banshee and I had to wipe drool from your mouth.”
Nat just glared at Wanda before her eyes came back to you. “Now malen'kaya bukashka. If my snoring is that bad you should have toild me earlier.”
“I thought—I dunno, I just figured it would upset you.” You frowned, hand reaching for your hot cocoa, hand wrapping round the mug.
The silence in the room fell suddenly like a stone in the water. Wanda and Nat eyes met with one another over your shoulder, they held their gaze for a few moments before coming back to you.
“Bug. I am a literal trained spy. It's going to take a hell of a lot more than that to upset me.”
“Really?” You frowned, still anticipating a negative come back—something you were so used to. Whenever previously in any relationship friends or family, you had bought up something even as little as snoring or putting a mug in a wrong cupboard, you were usually berated if made to feel guilty.
“Really.” Nats hands gravitated back to your face, she held you firmly between them, keeping the pressure, keeping you centred. She leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead and holding you in a place you needed. “I’ve been tortured, shot at, and chased by aliens. You telling me that my snoring keeps you awake,” Nats eyes softened even further, and Wanda found her way to your side, pushing your bunny into your lap. You clung to him and Wanda, like you needed them to breathe. “…it’s not even in the same universe, milaya.”
You nod slightly, leaning your face into Nats warmed hands, heart feeling full at the comfort you felt from both of them.
“Here’s what’s going to happen,” Nat whispered so not to startle you, and you just listened, you didn’t move an inch, just felt her palm on your cheek as she spoke softly “tomorrow I will go and find soemthing to stop the snoring or get Wanda to do something, I don’tcare what I do to snop me snoring if it helps you sleep better.”
“But I can’t turn of the loop in my head or the sound of the clock ticking, ot the fridge humming—”
“We’ll figure it out bug, but you don’t have to be falling asleep on bathroom floors anymore, and if you can’t sleep, you have to wake us up.” Nats voice was firm, not in a way that would make you feel bad because she knew your past and how even her tone was of the upmost importance when she spoke to you. It was just in a way that reminded you that you were no longer alone, even with the smallest things such as sleep—truthfully though, not getting enough sleep is never a small thing in Nats and Wanda’s eyes.
Nat and Wanda had their conversation with you, helped you to see that you didn’t need to deal with any of this alone, because you weren’t alone. You had them, you had Wanda Maximoff.
Wanda pressed a kiss to your cheek “I’m proud of you baby, now I’m going to take this,” Wanda grabbed your hot cocoa which was still warn, and full other than the few sips you had taken “and put it on the coffee table. I will put the film on ready to watch, blankets and stuffies are all on the couch, so come in when you’re ready.” Wanda’s voice was always so soft and kind even when she was frustrated with you for not fully being honest—or prehaps that was your overthinking that was controlling your thought pattern here. Whatever it was you were thankful you had them in your corner and heart.
When you still hadn’t come through to the living area about ten minutes after both Wanda and Nat had left the kitchen, you heard whispering voices and Nats raspy voice call out you “Bug you coming? I’m not gonna watch this with Wands complaining about the orcs again without you here to shut her up.”
“You could practically hear the glare from Wanda, who whispered to Nat in a low cautious voice “I’ll go get her.” you heard the creak of the sofa as Wanda stood, the noise of skin against wood as she amde her way back to the kitchen “Honey?”
“I—I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” You whispered the thoughts of having not told them about your bad sleeping getting to you more than they should. That conversation was done and over with but for some reason it was still swirling like a rock pool.
“That’s enough of that.” Wanda smiled sweetly “you’ve apologised more times than I can count, persides this wasn’t about something we needed to forgive you for.”
“It wasn’t?” You looked up, eyes wide and teary.
“No, it was about you not holding onto bad sleep alone, about telling us when things are hard, like we do with you, that’s the rules. We tell each other when things are hard, big or small.”
“But what about when Nat—
You were cut of by a voice loud enough to cut glass “THAT WAS ONE TIME!” You could hear the huff after Nats exhasperated shoutinng.
Wanda giggled at her wife’s annoyance, making your own heart light up like symphany “Yeah, well she’s a little harder to convince bug. Now we love you, so stop berating yourself. This wasn’t anything you did wrong.” Wanda repeated the sentiment. She loved you, you did nothing wrong, this was not about forgiving you, it was about trusting each other and communicating—no matter the issue.
“Okay.” You replied quietly, letting your voice linger in the cool morning air.
Wanda held out her hand which you took after about ten seconds of staring at it like it might bite you. Wanda let out a quite, heartfelt sigh of relief as she gripped your hand in hers. “Good girl. Come on.”
The two of you walked into the living room where Nat was sat and one end of the couch, one elbow on the arm—her heard turned when she ehard your footsteps, and she looked up at you with pride and love…so full of love that even as a super spy, she couldn’t hide that from you or Wanda.
You went to sit down on the other end of the couch but Wanda Pulled you in the direction of being in the middle, and Nats hand wrapped around your elbow.
“But, I always sit on the end.” You frowned, a little bit irritated that you were being moved like a doll.
“Not tonigt pumpkin.” Nat smiled, with a cheeky grin that covered almost her whole face.
“Natasha I told you never to use that nickname again. I hate it.” You growled, sounding more like a chipmunk than a bear, which only made it worse for you. Nat looked at you like you were adorable not scary—that was not the desired reaction.
“Then sit your arse between me and Wanda, or I’ll bring out your least favourite nickname of all. Don’t try me sweetheart.” Nats eyes looked straight into yours, she never expected eye contact back from you because she knew you couldn’t, it was too much for you, but even you noticed that her eyes could drill a hole in your head if she had the power to do it. You hated that she knew exactly what to bring out to make you sit in a palce you didn’t usually and why they were both doing it.
They were going to make you sleep if it killed them. First part being making you sleepy, with their hands on your back or face, surrounded by your stuffies. “I won’t fall asleep, I told you—”
“Try. Or at the very least trust us enough to help.” Wanda asked, desperating slowly seeping into her voice, and so, you reluctently agreed.
"You let yourself fall back into the middel of the couch right next to Nat who found your favourite eeyore amongst all the other stuffies Wanda had bought down. sHE pushed him into your arms, stting him beside your bunny. Wanda found the remote and sat next to you, but before pulling the blanket down from the back of the couch and onto her lap she looked at you with a soft glance and said to you in a small tone “Which lap?” and you knew exactly what she meant.
You weren’t exactly sure why you were fighting them on a thing like sleep, maybe you were overtired now, whatever the reason, it wasn’t going to happen.
“Wanda, stop, I’m not a child.” You huffed…exactly like a child, crossing your arms over your chest, and pouting a little, maybe even subconciously doing it.
“Then stop acting like one we have to put to bed. Youa re over tired, you haven’t slept properly in weeks. Lets us help you before I force you—I mean no, I’d never force you, just I’m frustrated bug, I want—no I need you to let us help you before you make yourself sick. Just, please for me?” Wanda eyess sparkled in the earlu sunrise light seeping in through the curtains, and you knew on some leavel, or maybe even all the levels that she was right.
“I hate you.” And you curled up, head on Wanda’s lap, and feet on Nats, and the both looked smuggly towards each other. Wanda pressed play on the remote, and the sound of Lady Galadrials voice came out the speakers ‘Namarie, Nai elen siluva lyenna. The world had changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was, is lost, for none now live to remember it.’
You let yourself feel held, blanket now over you, bunny and eeyore safely in your arms. Nats thumb gently running circles over your ankle, the lightest touch so you could feel her pressence without seeing her.
Wanda had one hand under you sleep shirt and on the middle of your back rubbing gently, with the other hand, with her her index fingers she ran lines down the bridge of your nose, her touch doing more than any sleep medicine ever could, the last thing you remember befor falling asleep,was their touch, the sound of their breaths and Wanda whispering “Good girl, sleep now, we’ll be here when you wake.” and the last voice of Lady Galderial on the television talking about the rings given to the dwarves.
Funny, You had fought something so hard and yet you were a sleep in seconds by their touch.
(Previous comment deleted.)
Beekneelsformommy on Chapter 2 Wed 13 Aug 2025 11:16PM UTC
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