Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Where the Hell are those two?!” 

Once again, it was IP collab time between Tower of God and another mobile game. As it was whenever there was a collab, a photoshoot was in order, which was all fine and dandy except for the fact that two of the main characters were missing. Hence, the lead photographer was currently pulling his hair out as he frantically mashed his phone. 

For what felt like the hundredth time that morning, the dreaded voicemail tone beeped and went, “ Sorry, but the person you are trying to reach is unavailable at the moment. Please hang up and try– ”

“Fuck!” the photographer cursed as he whipped his phone across the room. It ricocheted off a lamp and nearly knocked out an unpaid intern in the process. “What could possibly be the goddamn holdup?!”

“If you’re talking about Bam, he’s probably helping out some rando with a sob story or starting another war,” Endorsi said as she boredly filed her nails. “If you’re talking about Khun, he’s probably with Bam, enabling whatever shit he’s up to. Or lying dead somewhere.”

“Dead?!”

Endorsi shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time. Or the second time.”

“How many deaths is that kid up to now?” Yuri mused. “Three? Four? Man, it’s like the Grim Reaper’s got a thing for him.”

“Well, if AO3 and Twitter are to be believed, everyone’s got a thing for him,” Endorsi snorted. Yes, she knew all about the tags and the sheer number of Khun ships. It was a combination of frightening, infuriating, and pretty damn impressive.

“What, including you?” Yuri teased.

Endorsi gagged. “Please, he’s about as attractive as a bucket of rotting fish guts.”

“You sure you’re not talking about yourself?” As if summoned by them gossiping about him, Khun hurried into the room. He looked slightly out of breath and unusually disheveled; his tie was done up sloppily; his collar was rumpled; and his shirt was only partially buttoned up, half it tucked awkwardly into his pants for some reason. Even his hair was fluffed up in some places, not helped by him trying to fix his blue bandana into it as he used to do when he was younger. “I haven’t worn this thing in ages,” the light bearer muttered. “Why do they always make me put it on every time we have a photoshoot?”

“You!” the photographer raged at him. “Do you have any idea what time it is?!”

Khun made an exaggerated show of peering behind the other man. “According to that clock on the wall, it’s a bit after 11.”

“It means you’re over an hour late! Where the Hell have you been?!”

“Eh, it’s not important,” Khun said with a flippant wave of his hand. “What matters is that I'm here now.”

“Where’s Bam?” Yuri asked. 

“Out with a nasty virus,” Khun said with a rueful shake of his head.

“Really,” the photographer scowled, having a hard time believing such a thing.

Khun nodded. “Yeah, when I called him this morning, the poor guy could barely talk from how hoarse his throat was. Oh, and did I mention the virus is super contagious? For everyone’s sake, he asked if we could all just leave him alone for the day.”

The photographer let out an exasperated groan. “Well that’s just great. How are we supposed to do this shoot without the main protagonist? Shit, we’ll probably have to reschedule or–”

“No,” Jahad boomed. “I am a busy man. I’m already behind on my daily routine of aura farming in random people’s flashbacks. So either we do the shoot now or I’m leaving.”

“What’s he doing here?” Khun whispered to Endorsi.

“You know how it is for these collabs,” she said. “When they want some guy to market aside from Bam or you, they flip a coin. Heads for Jahad, tails for Urek Mazino.”

“Fine! Whatever!” the photographer huffed. He threw up his hands in frustration. “I’ll just have to photoshop Bam in another time or something. Okay everyone, let’s get into position!”

“Hang on,” Khun interjected. “Can I get a hair straightener and 10 minutes to fix myself up?”

“Absolutely not. Mr. Jahad needs to go back to his aura farming,” the photographer sniped as he slapped a prop Manbarondenna into the latter’s hands. “Besides, you’re the last person to be asking for any sort of time extension!”

“But–!” Khun protested.

“Oh shut the hell up, you look fine!” Endorsi griped. “We’ve been waiting for your dumb ass long enough! Can we just get this over with?!” 

“Everyone stop yapping so I can start snapping!” the photographer screeched. 

The next hour flew by in a flurry of blinding camera flashes. In between short water breaks, the photographer still fruitlessly tried to reach Bam. All that accomplished was him sending his blood pressure to the moon. When his face eventually turned a concerning shade of magenta and his forehead veins looked like they were about to burst, the team decided to end the shoot.

While the interns and assistants struggled to convince the belligerent photographer to go to the hospital, Khun took this chance to try and dip out of the studio. He didn’t get very far before Endorsi leapt in front of him. “Not so fast, dipshit. Tell me what you’ve really been up to this morning. What are you hiding?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he scoffed as he tried to duck around her.

The princess grabbed him by the collar. “Don’t play dumb with me, you little–” Her gaze trailed down to where the top of his shirt was still unbuttoned. Her eyes narrowed. Then, her face quickly contorted with rage and disgust as she recognized what it was she was looking at. She socked him in the gut.

“Fuck!” Khun wheezed. “What was that for?!”

“You dog,” Endorsi spat as she stormed out.

Yuri came over to ‘help him up’, but only so she could see what he was hiding under his collar. When she spotted what made Endorsi so angry, she burst out laughing. “Aha! So that’s why you were running late!” With a coy smirk, she added, “And I’m guessing the ‘virus’ Bam’s bedridden with is none other than coitus maximus ?”

“Please do not say the words ‘coitus maximus’ ever again.”

“How else do you want me to say it? That he got dicked down too hard?”

“Okay, I get it! Just stop!” Khun hissed, cheeks flaming red. His eyes darted over to the staff. He nervously wondered if they heard Yuri’s loud crowing, or if they noticed the cluster of rosy hickeys on his chest that were now on full display thanks to the princess pulling his shirt open like that. Fortunately, they seemed too preoccupied with the lead photographer, who was now stumbling around in the midst of a cardiac arrest. 

“What Bam and I do in private is nobody’s business,” Khun said irritably. “Now will you let go of me already?” 

Yuri did, still grinning from ear to ear. “Number one: you should do a better job of hiding it next time. And number two: you’re lucky Jinsung isn’t part of this photoshoot. He would rip out your skull and turn it into an ashtray.” 

Leaving behind that disturbing image for Khun to dwell on, Yuri happily skipped out of the room. To add further insult to injury, Jahad (who Khun forgot was still in the room) then strode past him and muttered, “How disappointing. You are so much like that father of yours.”

“Wha– I am not! ” Khun shrieked indignantly. “I’m nothing like that old pervert! You hear me?!”

But Jahad ignored him and simply walked away with his cape fluttering dramatically behind him.

Thoroughly embarrassed and with his dignity in shambles, Khun couldn’t help but feel that he should’ve taken his chances by skipping the whole blasted event.

Earlier that morning

Nestled under the blankets with Bam wrapped around him, Khun felt he could easily sleep the day away. Unfortunately, Bam’s Pocket had other plans. It rang and buzzed incessantly, forcing Khun awake despite his best efforts to ignore the noise. “Bam… Pocket…” he groaned.

“Mrmmmph…” Bam went as he hugged Khun tighter.

The blasted device continued to ring. Khun sighed. “Please Bam, answer your Pocket…”

Bam made a disgruntled noise as he pulled it out. He passed it over to Khun before determinedly burying himself back in the crook of the light bearer’s neck. 

Khun opened its Messages with annoyance, wondering who he should stab today for daring to take him out of his cozy little bubble. His eyes widened and he shot up in bed. “Oh shit!” he exclaimed as he shook Bam by the shoulder. 

“Urghh… what is it?” Bam whined.

“The collab photoshoot! It’s today!”

“What?!” Bam yelped, now fully awake. “I completely forgot! It’s scheduled for–”

“An hour ago,” Khun grimaced as he scrolled through the sheer number of missed notifications. His own Pocket had been on Silent Mode overnight but he figured its notifications probably looked just as intimidating. He gave Bam a sidelong glance. “Do you want to read all these? They get progressively angrier as you go down the list.”

“Ah, no thanks,” the other man gulped. “What do we do?”

Khun scrambled out of bed. “If we hurry, we might be able to do some damage control. Tell them we’re sorry and that we were horribly held up in traffic or something.” He hastily threw on the clothes that were strewn all over the floor from last night’s… activities. They were a bit wrinkled and his shirt was missing one of its buttons from when Bam yanked it off. But there was no time to go rooting through his closet. 

Bam tried to get ready as well but hissed in pain as soon as he sat up. Khun turned to him immediately. “Bam? Are you okay?”

“Sore…” the brunette winced as he rubbed his lower back. 

With the blankets pooled around his waist, his upper body was an open display of purples and reds; a vivid painting paying tribute to their lovemaking last night. Khun didn’t have to look under the blankets to know Bam’s lower half was in the same state. He gave his boyfriend a worried look. “I’m sorry. I think I took things too far.”

“Hey, I’m the one who wanted it,” Bam said. A small, lazy smile appeared on his face as he reminisced on their fun. It was then replaced by a sheepish grin. “But, um… I think I’ll have a hard time walking around for a little while.”

“Can you use the Thorn?”

Bam pouted. “I could but it won’t heal me without erasing all your marks as well. They already fade away quicker than I’d like thanks to the Thorn’s passive abilities.”

Khun blushed. His boyfriend liked to wear those hickeys around like they were medals of honour. It was a miracle that no one noticed yet. It gave Khun a headache just thinking about how the others would react if they learned the pair were sleeping together.

“Firefish?” Bam suggested.

Khun shut his eyes and was silent for a moment, presumably asking the flaming creature via internal thoughts. When he opened them again, he responded flatly, “It said, ‘I’m not even going to dignify that with an answer.’”

“Bummer,” the wave controller sighed.

Bam’s Pocket blared again, somehow sounding even angrier. Khun cursed under his breath. “Listen, I’ll just go on my own then,” he said as he messily whipped his tie around his neck. “I’ll tell them you’re busy, like you’re in the middle of starting another war or something.”

“Please don’t. Everyone’s gonna think that’s all I do,” Bam complained.

“Everyone already kinda believes it, so…”

“No.”

Khun sighed. “Okay fine, I’ll just say you have a bad cold. Something along those lines. I’ll figure it out on the way there.” He gave Bam a quick smooch on the cheek. “Take it easy. I’ll come back as soon as I can.”

As the light bearer spun around and bolted out the door, the untucked side of his shirt flapped up. In that instant, Bam noticed the trim of his briefs peeking out above Khun’s waistband. Bam’s briefs, not Khun’s own . He wondered if he should call his boyfriend and let him know he pulled on the wrong pair of underpants. In the end, he decided against it. With a smirk, Bam tucked his Pocket away and flopped back onto the bed. More people needed to understand that Khun was his anyway.