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Beyond looked into the face that she had been try mimic her whole life, feeling utterly defeated. She'd done everything she could be like L, starting estrogen as soon as she could to escape her own body and become her. She'd grown her hair out, dying it an almost unnatural shade of black, because Beyond was taught that all girls had long hair. She'd traded out her beige khakis for long pleated skirts and wool sweaters, figuring that L would be classy. L had plenty of money to dress like royalty. Beyond had even spent time learning how to walk around in heels, something that had come in handy when she decided to chase Misora down.
L stared at her, blinking slowly. "So you're the one they raised to take my place. Huh."
L's voice carried no disconcertanable accent, despite having been raised in the same halls as Beyond. Her eyes were a stormy grey color, reminding Beyond of the clouds that always seemed to linger in the English sky. Beyond had nailed some of her features— the dark hair, the pale skin, the unusually short nails, and the practiced poised look— to an uncanny degree. But things Beyond hadn't perfected were glaring.
L, for one, did not have long hair— rather, her dark hair was short and choppy, standing in every direction. Secondly, L did not wear skirts and dress shirts. Roger had insisted Beyond do such, as classy ladies wore skirts and dresses and dress shirts. Looking back, it seemed stupid to think someone busy and always on the move would be a high end femme. Beyond wasn't sure if Roger had been trying his best or if Roger was simply a strong believer in traditional gender roles. Either way, Roger had been relatively supportive of her transition, hating her just as much as he had prior to her transition.
"You're not quite what I imagined," admitted L softly, though she didn't sound disappointed.
"I imagine you thought I wouldn't kill anyone," muttered Beyond, staring at the ceiling. Her time in prison had been relatively uninteresting, each day pass in unending silence. The guards left her alone in her cell, finding her unnerving. She imagined they were unaware of her transition, imaging they would be meaner if they did.
"I didn't really know what to think of you, actually." L tilted her head, locking eyes with Beyond. "Miss Misora was the first time I really got an outside perspective of you. I had heard of you— I mean, technically, I'm the one who paid for your surgery."
"You?" Beyond let out a soft laugh. "You probably wish you would have saved that money rather than spending it on a criminal bound to rot in prison, huh?"
"I never said that," replied L gently, reaching out to touch Beyond's face. "I owe you that, I think. I cannot imagine that your life was easy."
Beyond was actually speechless. She never imagined L would apologize for something she didn't really have control over. Beyond had wanted to impress L, not cause her guilt. Yes, Beyond's childhood had been far from ideal, filled with violence and gore. However, Beyond imagined that L's childhood had not been much better, ushered from crime scene to crime scene without much regards for her childhood innocence. Beyond wasn't really sure she could really speak on childhood innocence, considering she did murder a child.
"You never asked for this."
"Neither did you." Beyond finally found her voice. "But the difference between us, the thing that separates us, is that I deserve my current fate. You, on the other hand, are forever trapped in yours."
"Well, I do enjoy this life, despite all of the turmoil. It's sick to say, but I love the chase. I love the entertainment." L's fingers finally brushed over the side of Beyond's face, causing Beyond to blush. "I think, that had I not been properly stimulated, I would have taken a similar course."
"Killed people?"
"Yes." L's confidence didn't waver, despite the morbid topic. "You are, in a way, a mirror. You show all the things I could have been. You are a reflection of me. We have lived much of the same life— eaten off the same plates, walked down the same halls, slept in similar rooms— yet we have major differences. I find it all rather fascinating. We were meant to mirror each other, but I think it is more accurate to say that we intertwined our fate.
"By trying so hard to become me, you have created something I am undeniably attracted to. You are similar to me, but different enough to be attractive. I knew you killed those people right from the beginning, but I'm not even sure how I knew. I had never really met you, only heard of you. But when you did such, I knew I needed to find out more. I had to know why."
Beyond didn't know how to take L's speech. Part of her wanted to ask about fucking, while the other part wanted to know what L had expected Beyond to be. "Who did you think I would be?"
"I really don't know. Roger described you as neat, strong-willed, and quiet. You're more feminine than I thought you'd be," admitted L in a nonchalant tone.
"And you're more masculine than I thought you'd be."
"Are you disappointed by that, Beyond?" L raised an eyebrow, her finger tracing over the scar on Beyond's face.
Beyond really couldn't feel L's finger running over her face; she could see the slender, pale finger out of the corner of her eye. Despite having minor scarring from the burns, Beyond had never regained feeling in areas that were badly burned. It had been excruciating to heal through, only for some of the areas to never regain feeling— something doctors said would never return in certain areas due to the nerves being destroyed. Beyond immediately snapped out of her trance, focusing back on L. "No, not at all."
"Mmm." L bit her lip, finger frozen over the dark scar on Beyond's cheek. "Do you still hate me?"
"I never hated you." Beyond had been fascinated, simply obsessed, with the detective. She had wanted the detective's constant attention, willing to do anything to get it. "I have never hated you and never will."
"Then why do this?" L gestured to the room around them, and Beyond missed L's fingers on her face.
"Kill people?" Beyond continued when L nodded. "I wanted to give you a challenge. I thought you would enjoy an unsolvable case. I set out to give you a case that you could not solve, although I obviously failed. If anything, I thought you'd hate me."
"No."
"Why are you here?" Beyond asked suddenly.
"I need your help." L looked around nervously. "There is a case I need your help with. Kira— that's what the media has dubbed this killer— is able to kill with a name and face. I suspect that they have something similar to your eyes. I want your help."
"My eyes?" Beyond finally looked up to see L's lifespan, wavering between months and years. Beyond supposed her decision made the fate sealed. "You think they have similar eyes?"
"I'm not certain," muttered L. "I have a few leads. I've narrowed it down to Japan. I'm thinking somewhere in Tokyo, but I'm not dead-set on that."
"Will you send the images here for me?"
"No." L looked disgusted by the idea. "You're coming with me, if you want."
"The prison will let you do that?"
"The prison will erase any record of you ever being here if I asked," answered L. "Your eyes have use in practically every case. It's a waste to have you just sit here."
"Will we be partners then?"
L, apparently relaxed now, moved their foreheads together. It was the most intimate contact Beyond ever had. "Yes. We will stop Kira so that he doesn't kill you. I've already scrubbed your records, but I refuse to take any chances."
"Are you doing this for me?" questioned Beyond. Her heart fluttered at the thought.
"I am. I need my other half, my mimic if you will, safe." L breathed out, her lips oddly close to Beyond's mouth.
Beyond wondered, for a split moment, what would happen if she bit L's lips before thinking better of it. "I'll help you. I want to help you."
"Good." L seemed to relax into Beyond. "Good girl."
"I will always try to be your good girl," said Beyond, unsure why she said it. Despite her confusion, she meant it.
"I know." L smiled. "I know you will be."