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Stranger than paradise

Summary:

Subspace realizes his time is running out and decides he needs to cure his rot, and soon, but first, he needs a guinea pig. Fortunately, he has his co-worker.

Chapter 1

Notes:

I LOVE HYPERLASERR (ts chapter is short and poorly written sry)

Chapter Text

The sound of a beeping alarm awoke Hyperlaser. It was dark out, like always, and he could feel the cold seeping in through a window he had forgotten to close the night before. Patting around for his helmet on the table next to him, his hand finally landed on its cold, glass visor, and he turned to pick it up with both hands, placing it on his head. The familiar sounds of machinery turning on filled his ears.
As he slowly started to regain his vision, Hyperlaser stretched and stood up from the small bed he had slept in, making his way to the scratched wooden dresser that lay next to the door of his room. Hyperlaser's apartment wasn't nice by any means, but he was still grateful for his job, which provided him with a place to live, even if it wasn't in great shape.

He tugged on his shirt over his helmet and buttoned the grey-blue suit over it, he walked over to the mirror and looked at his reflection through the helmet's glass, he hadn't seen his face since the accident, and he didn't want to anyway, he couldn't be ashamed of how he looked if he didn't know what he looked like.
After it had happened, the doctors had offered to show him a photo, but he had refused. Knowing might have made the pain worse than it already was. Though he wasn't sure if he cared anymore after everything that had happened in his life, he didn't have room to care. If he weren't mostly blind, he probably wouldn't wear the helmet.

A small noise took him away from his thoughts, and he looked down to see a grey ball of fur pawing at the hem of his pants, Princess. He picked up the cat and carried her down the narrow hallway to the small kitchen, setting her down. He grabbed the bag of cat food and poured some into her bowl. Upon hearing the pellets hit the bowl, Princess waddled over and began to eat. Hyperlaser sighed. Just then, his phone buzzed, and he looked down to see who the message was from, Subspace, of course. His boss was an interesting character, to say the least. They had never been on the best of terms; if Hyperlaser was being honest, he heavily disliked the imp. He unlocked his phone to read the text.
“Come to my office as soon as possible. I have an important question for you.”

Snow that had fallen the night before crunched underneath Hyperlaser’s boots as he walked down the path in front of the blocky-grey apartment he lived in, and cold wind snapped at the sliver of neck that was exposed between his jacket collar and the bottom of his helmet. In the distance, he could see the silhouette of the train station, barely visible from the small glimpses of light that crept over the tops of the looming mountains that surrounded Blackrock. It wouldn’t get much brighter than this; it never did. Blackrock had always been known for being cold and dark; the sun never fully showed itself, it had always been blocked by the mountains or the thick clouds that constantly loomed over the faction.

After a few more minutes of walking, Hyperlaser finally made it to the train station and sat down on one of the cool metal benches and awaited the train's arrival. After no more than five minutes, the train arrived. It was a sleek steel bullet train with black tinted windows, with each car spanning around 80 feet. A grey ramp extended onto the train platform Hyperlaser was standing on. He stepped forward into the train and sat down on one of the blue seats before the train took off.

Hyperlaser looked around the train cabin. About a dozen other inphernals were in the train, minding their own business. He gazed out the window, watching the large snowy mountains and clouds rush by. Soon, the buildings of the center of Blackrock came into view. A mix of brutalist and cyberpunk architecture made up the city; it was certainly a sight to behold compared to the outer parts of Blackrock, where most of the working class lived in the giant square apartments. Part of him wished he worked in the city of Blackrock; his life could have been so much better, working in an office or making weapons instead of using them seemed much less dangerous than his current job was, but the job he had was, in a way, all he knew how to do. His office was on one of the mountains right outside the city. He sighed lightly as the buildings started to get farther away and the mountain got closer.

The train hissed to a stop in front of a small station where Hyperlaser stepped off onto the concrete path that led to his office. It was a dark grey building lodged into the side of a mountain. He continued walking forward until he reached a big black metal door with Blackrock’s insignia on it. He took a keycard out of his pocket and pressed it to a scanner, and the doors slid open as he walked in.

The hallway was dimly lit by caged lights that were bolted onto the metal walls. Hyperlaser's footsteps echoed throughout the tunnel until it opened up into a large main room where he glanced around to see a few other inphernals chatting or doing their job. He continued forward and up a flight of stairs, stopping when he reached a grey door with a sign on it that read 'Subspace T. Mine, Scientist'. He pushed it open to find the imp sitting in an old office chair with his hands clasped together, as if he had been waiting intently on Hyperlaser's arrival.
"Hello Hyperlaser, so glad you could make it!"

Chapter 2: She doesn't have anything You want to steal Well, nothing you can touch.

Summary:

Title is from the song "Pretty in pink" by the Psychedelic Furs, I personally prefer the Dresden Doll cover but wtvr. anyway sry 4 taking so long. I have had low motivation l8ly lol

Chapter Text

“Why did you call me here, Subspace?” Hyperlaser asked, hand still on the door, reluctant to enter.

"I need a small favor, but let's not dwell on that! Sit down and get comfortable!" the imp said, gesturing toward a metal folding chair a few feet away.

Hyperlaser let go of the door and let it close. He grabbed the chair and set it down in front of Subspace’s office chair.

“Enough with the pleasantries, Subspace. Why did you call me here in the first place? You obviously want something from me. What is it?”

“I only said I wanted to ask you a question, but you are right, you do have something I want.”

“Could you just tell me Subspace?”

The imp cleared his throat and stood up, “As you are aware, Hyperlaser, in recent times my rot has gotten worse.”

There was a slight pause before ‘worse.’ Hyperlaser sensed Subspace’s hesitation, as if he disliked admitting his condition.

“And what does that have to do with me?” Hyperlaser asked.

"I’ll tell you if you let me finish! I know I don’t have much time left. I’m working on a cure for my ailment, but first, I need a test subject. That’s where you come in!" Subspace said, pointing at Hyperlaser.

Hyperlaser was taken aback. Was Subspace actually suggesting that they run tests on him? He knew the scientist was insane, but he had underestimated how far they would actually go.

“Subspace, I am not going to let you run tests on me. I am a person, not a lab rat. I am well aware of how your ‘experiments’ go, and I would prefer not to end up like them. Besides, don’t you just kidnap all of them, can’t you… er get another?” Sfoth, that sounded wrong, like he was condoning kidnapping, which he kinda was, he would rather someone he didn’t know be kidnapped than killed.

“I need someone I can see regularly, and if I ‘invited’ someone else, they’d talk about it afterward. Besides, Hyperlaser, these tests are for a cure, not harm! I’d pay you, of course!” Subspace’s tone was light but still off-putting.

That got Hyperlaser’s attention. He wasn’t broke, but extra cash was tempting. Maybe it could help him leave Blackrock—or at least get a new place.

“How much are we talking? Hyperlaser asked, his voice trailing off slightly; he couldn’t believe he was actually considering taking Subspace up on his offer, as crazy as it seemed. He felt the need to leave Blackrock more and more every day. The faction’s political tension had been rising recently; every day felt almost the same. But then reality came crashing back. If he left, what would he do? Almost all his life, he had done nothing but kill for Blackrock. As much as he hated admitting it, he felt he didn’t truly know how to live without faction; it had given him structure, whether he liked it or not. Before he could get too deep in his thoughts, Subspace’s grating voice snapped him out of it. “I’m willing to offer around 45 thousand bux for your contribution, that is, if you follow through.”

“45 thousand bux?! Subspace, where did you even obtain so much money?” While that much couldn’t permanently get Hyperlaser out of Blackrock, it was certainly a good start.

“Where I got it isn’t important, now do you accept?!” Subspace was getting impatient; this was taking longer than it should have. Most inphernals in Blackrock would have taken the offer, no questions asked. But Hyperlaser wasn’t like most people in Blackrock.

“Well, I’m not exactly sure about this Subspace, there are risks after all, and-” Before Hyperlaser could finish his sentence, Subspace cut him off, “50 thousand bux, take it or leave it, there are hundreds who would take this offer up, I could have just as easily chosen someone else to help me but I was feeling nice so I chose you first.”

Hyperlaser sighed; he might as well. Subspace had said that this would be harmless... probably, and 50 thousand bux was an incredibly tempting offer. “I’ll take it, on one condition you don’t do anything that will affect my skills.”

“Wonderful! Now sit down, I need to draw some of your blood first to see if we are compatible for these experiments.”

“Oh, are we doing this... now?” Hyperlaser hadn’t expected this to go down so fast.

“Well, yes, I don’t have all day now. And if we aren’t compatible, I’ll still pay you, uhh... 50 bux for wasting your precious time.” Subspace’s voice was laced with sarcasm, but at least he was offering to pay.

Hyperlaser relaxed in the metal chair, sighing, “Let's get it over with then.” He rolled up his left sleeve and pointed his scarred arm in Subspace’s direction. The imp grabbed his arm, their sharp claw-like nails digging into Hyperlaser’s flesh. With his other hand, Subspace opened a drawer beside him, pulling out a large needle.

“You ready?!” Hyperlaser could practically feel the scientist's ugly grin under the gas mask he constantly wore, before Hyperlaser could respond. Subspace jabbed the needle into his arm at an angle that Hyperlaser suspected the imp chose just to cause him more pain.

“While we are at it, why don't you tell me about those lovely burns on your arm? Must have been a pretty gruesome phight!” Subspace asked, ‘Was this his way of making small talk?’ Hyperlaser thought.

“No.” He replied. The pain from the needle was starting to become noticeable, but just as soon as the soreness started, it stopped.

“All done!” Subspace triumphantly held up the needle; it was filled with crimson blood. “Now just give me a sec before I send you off!” He ran out of the small room with the needle, which probably wasn’t a safe thing to do, but this was Subspace after all. A small fan that Hyperlaser hadn’t heard over Subspaces' screechy voice suddenly seemed deafening without all of that scientists' blabbering. He looked down at his arm, the one that Subspace stabbed him with a needle, and from it, a small hole was dripping blood. Was Subspace going to bandage it up? Probably not, the imp was oblivious to others, and Hyperlaser had survived far worse than getting his blood drawn.

The door slammed open with a loud bang, and Subspace stepped into the room. “Blackrock hasn’t bothered to update my damn lab equipment yet, so I will get the results within a few hours.”

“Oh, can I leave?” Hyperlaser asked

“Yes, you may!” Subspace exclaimed, holding open the door for the mercenaries' exit.

“Uh, bye then.” He said, walking out of the office.

“I’ll message you the results when I get them!” Subspace called after Hyperlaser as he walked down the metal hallway.

Chapter 3: Katana spawnday doodle

Summary:

its a bit late (im postng ts abt an hour after after 9/20/25 ended) uhh ts is jst a stupid idea i had 4 a doodle, i was gonna finish chapter 3 and post this along with it but today is also my girlfriends birthday! so i spent it w/ her, i love her smmm!

Chapter Text

 

Katana will be in ch3 i pinky promise 🥺

Chapter 4: It doesn't matter, doesn't matter at all, just come to the bar

Summary:

Katana & Hyperlaser go 2 the bar :3, anyway song name is Come To The Bar by Pete And The Pirates, its rlly fire song :)

Notes:

sry 4 not posting i have been superrr busy and i had a ton of writers block :(, anyway i went 2 fan-x on friday and cosplayed medkit :D

Chapter Text

The tone of Crossroads was much more cheery than Blackrock’s had ever been; it was warm, and the sun was shining with only a few clouds in the sky. Inphernals chatted and walked about freely. The whole sight gave Hyperlaser a sliver of hope and washed away some of the worries he had about the meeting he had just had with Subspace. As he made his way over to Zuka’s car, he saw a few other phighters that he recognised, two of whom he knew personally; Katana and Medkit.

Katana was a large demon who resembled an owl-like creature. They would go drinking after phights sometimes, and while Hyperlaser didn’t consider him a ‘friend’, he felt somewhat safe in Katana’s presence.

Medkit was a healer who had run from Blackrock years ago. While Hyperlaser wasn’t particularly close with Medkit when he was working there, he didn’t think of him as an enemy, but not someone he would trust either.

The teams were announced before the match started, the red team was made up of Scythe, Medkit, Slingshot, Skateboard, and Katana. The blue team was made up of Rocket, Sword, Suriken, Boombox, and himself. As the other phighters chatted, Hyperlaser stood to the side waiting for the match to begin. His team wasn’t bad by any means, but the red team had a talented healer, a tank, and Scythe.

 

A buzzer rang, signaling the start of the match. Hyperlaser grabbed his gun and walked into the arena, he scanned the large space for a place to hide from, as to get a better shot without being seen and attacked, he wasn’t fast by any means, and it was best to stay safe. He climbed up some bleachers and crouched. He needed a good target, scanning the arena he could see Skateboard and Slingshot teaming up and going after Rocket, Medkit was nowhere to be seen, and Scythe was talking To Katana, while shooting at Boombox who was trying to get closer, Katana seemed to be doing nothing but try to slowly get away from Scythe, Hyperlaser knew they had history, but what it was he didn’t exactly know. Katana wasn’t very talkative about his past, so in turn, Hyperlaser wasn’t too talkative about his either. They mostly chatted about anything but themselves. In an attempt to distract Scythe so Boombox could get closer, Hyperlaser shot at her. It hit her in the chest, stopping her for just enough time for Boombox to get closer.

The match went by in a blur. The red team ended up winning. He wasn’t too bitter about it. Scythe got MVP, Katana came in second to last, that wasn’t like him at all. No matter, he needed to get home.

As he exited the building, he saw Katana sitting on a bench, unmoving. It was a bit unnerving, but not out of the blue for him. Either way, Katana seemed off. Hyperlaser approached him, the samurai didn’t move as if he didn’t notice him; in fact, Katana didn’t seem to register Hyperlaser’s presence until he tapped him on the shoulder.

“Katana, are you okay?”

Katana looked up as Hyperlaser said this.

“Yes, I just,” He hesitated as he talked, choosing his words carefully, “Have been thinking about some stuff that was brought up recently.

“Would you like to talk about it?” Hyperlaser asked, knowing his efforts were futile; Katana rarely ever opened up to him.

There was a slight pause before Katana replied, “Yes, I think I would.”

His response took the mercenary off guard, “Oh, really? Uh, do you want to go to a bar and talk about it?”

“That sounds quite nice.”

Hyperlaser extended his hand to Katana to help him get up Katana took it, and the two walked down the street. Hyperlaser glanced up at Katana; his feathers seemed to shine under the warm sun. Hyperlaser had always admired the larger inphernals' feathers; he had rarely ever seen demons with bird-like traits. Maybe that was why he liked them so much.

“What?” Katana had noticed Hyperlaser staring.

“Nothing,” Hyperlaser turned his head away.

After a few minutes, they made it to the bar, Hyperlaser pushed open one of the doors, holding it for Katana to pass through, and they made their way to two of the red leather barstools. And the pair sat down in front of the wooden counter. Hyperlaser glanced around. The bar was mostly empty except for a few other demons; it was only four, and the bar would fill up in a few hours, but for now, it was mostly quiet. Behind the counter, a small demon with auburn horns walked over to them.

“Can I get you two anything?” He asked.

“Whisky.”

“Sake.”

“Of course!” The small inphernal turned away ,and the two sat in awkward silence, Hyperlaser wasn’t sure if he should ask Katana what he had wanted to talk about, he was always closed off, and he might have changed his mind, if he asked him Katana might think he was being pushy, but on the other hand if Katana had even considered telling Hyperlaser about his troubles that could mean he was okay talking to him about stuff. Katana’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts,

“Today… during the phight,” Katana chose his words carefully, “Scythe pulled me aside to talk, I do not know how aware you are of my past with her… organization.”

“Oh, the True eye thing?”

“Yes, I was once a part of it.” Katana admitted, he sounded ashamed, “It was years ago ,but more recent than I would like.”

 

“I see. What did Scythe say to you?” Hyperlaser asked, before Katana replied, the bartender placed the drinks in front of them, and Katana lifted his mask slightly to take a sip before he answered.

“Well, after I left, Scythe was angered and made a few attempts to harm me, but in more recent years, she has stopped that, and today she asked me to consider joining again. When I rejected her offer, she continued to ask.”

Hyperlaser stayed quiet as Katana talked, lifting his helmet only once to drink from his glass; if Katana wanted his input, he would ask.

“I worry that Scythe won’t give up. She is resilient and doesn’t quit easily. I know she will go to great lengths for my return. I was a valuable asset to The True Eye when I was with them, but I was just an asset, not a person.”

Hyperlaser watched as Katana tilted his mask back once more to down the rest of his drink in a single gulp, as he did he noticed something he had never seen before, part of Katana’s mouth was torn, his sharp teeth showing through the tear in his skin, it shouldn’t have been too shocking considering Katana’s age and his newly revealed history, the cult was vicious, and you don’t often go looking at your acquaintance's mouth.

“What was it like in the cult?” Hyperlaser found himself asking without thinking. He had always been a bit curious about it. “Sorry if that was forward, I understand if it’s not something you want to talk about.”

“No, no it’s fine, I don’t want to get into too many details, but it was… terrible, I was my worst self in during those years, I was a soulless killer who didn’t care about the victims, I thought I was part of something bigger, and those who weren't believers deserved the worst, the people in it are terrible or brainwashed, it took years for me to realize what I was doing and the lie I was following.”

Hyperlaser finished off his drink as Katana spoke his helmet was tilted back revealing his burnt, and scarred lower face, he found it odd how much trust Katana was giving him, they had only been friends for around eight months, and Hyperlaser didn’t consider him a friend, only someone to drink and have conversation with, he didn’t fully trust Katana, this was not to say he didn’t like Katana, in fact the owl-like man was the first positive relationship he had had in, well years, to be honest the most important person to him at the moment, he hated Subspace, and Princess was a cat.

The two had another round before paying and leaving the bar and into the night.

Katana tilted his head down to look at Hyperlaser,

“Goodbye, Hyperlaser, thank you for listening to me.”

“Anytime,” Hyperlaser said, turning away from Katana towards the train station. It was late and he had work in the morning.

As he walked down the street, his phone buzzed in his pocket. Pulling it out, he read the message; it was from Subspace.

“Good news, you are compatible! Come to my office tomorrow!”