Work Text:
Louis swung open the door and threw his keys onto the counter. It wasn’t the first time this week he was getting home from work at 3am, even though his shift was supposed to end at 2am. Somehow, he always ended up staying late cleaning up the bar and helping servers cash out. He wasn’t exactly a manager, but the managers there gave him all the privileges of being a manager without the pay. So, whenever someone needed help, he agreed to help, which always left him leaving an hour later than he was supposed to be. He was just happy that he was finally home. He managed to clock in 60 hours this week, which was decent for a job.
Louis got hired at the local bar three years ago when he started university. He was supposed to be living in a dorm on campus, but by the second week of classes, he was already claustrophobic and could not stand his roommate. He had papers all over the room and no matter what he did, he couldn't keep track of anything. So, he decided to save up money from every shift he worked, and worked overtime every week, so he could move out. The next semester, he dropped living in the dorm and decided to get an apartment a few blocks away. He managed to weasel out the first two rent payments by himself, but then work cut back his hours since he was going to classes more than he was first semester. So, he put an advertisement on the school bulletin and got a couple dozen replies. He met a few of them, and decided that Liam and Harry were the two best people to live with, since neither seemed to be too weird or annoying. They managed to get to know each other a lot over the past two and a half years.
Louis was surprised that Liam wasn’t on the sofa playing FIFA. He usually stayed up until Louis got home just so he knew that his roommates were home safely. You could say that Liam was the father of the household. He managed all the bills, collected everyone’s rent a week before it was due, made sure that there was enough food in the house, and made sure that everyone was okay and safe before he went to bed. Louis wasn’t mad, though. In fact, he was quite the opposite; he was relieved that Liam went to bed at a decent hour. It was Louis’ fifth shift in a row and he didn't like it when Liam stayed up too late waiting around for him.
Harry was definitely fast asleep by now. He was the kind of guy who fell asleep, usually, before midnight. But, he was also the one who wakes up at 6am to make a kale smoothie and go for a run. Louis quickly labeled him as the “freak” of the house. Louis and Harry were basically opposites when it came to lifestyles. Harry was a health freak who ate healthy and exercised every day unless he was beyond sick. He worked at a retail store 9am-5pm four days a week and then taught exercise classes at the local gym two of the other days.
On the other hand, Louis was not a such a health freak. His version of exercise was carrying kegs to the bar, carrying trays of glassware, and doing some bar tricks that involved flipping cups and shaking glasses and drinks. He worked from 5pm-1am five or six days a week, which meant that he was only usually awake at home from 11am to 4pm. He was barely home, but when he was, he and Harry would chill and play FIFA or go and do some stupid shit together. Last week, Louis had the great idea to go rock climbing before his shift and Harry almost killed Louis since he fell off and scared Harry. Sure, he was attached to wires and safety harnesses, but Harry could just imagine him falling, breaking an ankle, having to stay home, get miserable and broke, and he could not watch Louis do that to himself.
Louis covered his mouth with the back of his hand as he yawned. Since everyone was asleep, he stripped out of his work clothes, threw them on the back of the chair for tomorrow since they were still “clean enough” and didn't reek of sweat yet. Or, maybe, Liam would throw them in the laundry for him tomorrow. He hoped for the latter.
The night came and went and Louis woke to the smell of coffee and burnt toast. Well, at least it wasn't a completely awful smell he woke up to. He looked over at his alarm clock. 9:48am. Earlier than normal, but, he didn't stay up talking to Liam until 3am, like he usually would do if Liam was up. Or, he would stay up even later if he was playing FIFA.
He pulled on a baggy shirt, that was actually probably Harry or Liam’s, and made his way downstairs, without pants on. Nothing completely abnormal for Louis.
“Hey, lad,” Liam said, a bit too cheekily for Louis.
“Morning, fucker. Made me coffee?”
“Only for the best.”
Louis grabbed the biggest mug that they had and filled it up with coffee, and took a long sip of it, not even bothering to add in milk or sugar.
“Where’s Harry?” Louis questioned. He stepped up on the stool that was in the kitchen and sat up on the countertop, just like every other morning. He swung his legs, relaxed.
“Probably work, I think,” Liam replied. He handed Louis a piece of buttered non-burnt toast.
Louis nodded and thanked Liam for the food.
“And I threw your clothes in the laundry, you sneaky bastard.” Louis just winked in response, completely addressing the fact that he was a sneaky bastard, indeed.
Harry didn't show up back home before Louis left for work, which was fine. What was odd to Louis was that Harry didn't swing by on his lunch break, but he figured that Harry must have just either worked through his break or went to the gym. He didn't linger on the thought of where Harry was for long before he headed out the door to go to his job.
The bar was busy and Louis worked right straight until the last minute. For whatever reason, Wednesdays were busy at the bar. He had many of his regulars come in, and they were always forgiving when Louis took a bit longer than usual to give them refills and to check on them. It was always a pain to bartend those days, but Louis always walked out with a pocketful of cash, so he couldn't complain much.
At work, Louis was quite the flirt. He would flirt with anybody if he thought that it would mean more money in his pocket. Of course, his regulars always left him a decent tip, but if Louis turned on the charm on some younger people, he could nearly get double the tip that he was expecting. All it took was a few winks and a few flirtatious jokes; nothing he wouldn't have done in the first place. The guys always tipped him well if he kept them topped off and happy. It wasn't too hard, especially since he has been doing it for three years now.
He stayed late and helped the waitresses clean up the bar so that they could go home earlier than they would have if Louis didn't help. He checked the clock and was surprised to see that it was only 1:30am, rather than the typical 2am he usually walks out the door. In fact, he was out of the door at 1:45 and was home by 2am.
He walked into Liam asleep on the couch, the TV remote in his hand, and he could hear him snore from the front door. Rather than throwing his keys like he normally does, he placed them gently on the table and shrugged his sweatshirt off and put it on the coat rack. He never knew what to do when Liam fell asleep before he got home on the couch. In theory, he would wake him up and tell him to go to bed, but then he might get snippy. But, it was only 1:30, so he couldn't have been asleep for that long.
He decided to let Liam sleep and put a blanket on him and dimmed the lights in the living room. He went up to his room and saw on his way that Harry was asleep as well.
It was nice to know that Harry was back home.
Louis awoke to Harry jumping on his bed. He chuckled under his breath and pulled the sheets over his head in an attempt to ignore Harry. Instead, Harry took a seat on Louis’ thighs and leaned forward, elbows resting on his chest.
“What time is it, Harold?”
“7!”
“At night?!” Louis shot up, anxious that he had slept through the day and was late to work.
“No, silly. In the morning. Let’s go for a run!”
“Are you bloody joking?”
“You got home early last night.”
“And how do you know that?”
Harry shrugged. He didn't want Louis to know that he checks in his room when he wakes up in the middle of the night to make sure he made it home safely last night — or that he has an alarm set for 2:30am just to make sure that Louis is either home or gets home in the next hour.
“I went to go to the loo and saw that you were in your bed at 2,” was the excuse that he made. Louis just stuck his tongue out, playfully.
“Well you almost literally scared the piss out of me. Come on, you know I don’t run.”
“Not yet.”
Harry had a way with his facial expressions. All he had to do was put out the pouty-lip, and next thing Louis knew, he was out of breath, running down a nearby trail, a mile and a half into the run.
It didn't take much for Louis to give into Harry’s requests. They were great friends and Louis just wanted to see Harry happy, and vice versa. They both went out of their way to make sure that the other was safe and home, even though the other didn't know it.
In fact, when they went back home, Louis made everyone, including Liam, breakfast and tea.
It was going to be a good day.
They mostly just hung around for the rest of the day, until Louis an hour before Louis had to leave for work. Liam prepared Louis a quick meal before he left for work- sushi and rice. He always loved it when Liam made him a meal — even if it was sushi from the store and minute rice. It’s always the thought that counts. Louis ate and then rushed out the door, worried that he was going to be late for work.
In fact, he wasn't even late by a minute. He was early by five minutes, which was wonderful. A few of his regulars showed up in the first few hours of his shift. Four hours into his shift, he managed to somehow make a hundred dollars. But by four and a half hours, he had to go to the back on break and sit down. He was nauseous and had a massive headache and just overall didn't feel good. Nobody was sick at the apartment and nobody yesterday appeared sick.
Then, he realized, that it was probably the sushi. Fuck.
He was relieved to see that one of his favorite managers was on. He told her he felt ill and needed to go home. Within seeing Louis for thirty seconds, she was nodding and told him to feel better and that she would cover the bar. It wasn't busy, and Louis knew that by the patterns, it wouldn't get busy for the rest of the night.
When Louis got home, he was nauseous beyond belief but just was focusing on not puking. God, he hated puking. He noticed that Liam’s car was not in the driveway, but that there was another car in the driveway that he didn't recognize.
It wasn't unusual for Liam to not be home at midnight. He usually went out partying or went to his girlfriends house for a bit. He figured that Harry must have friends over. He knew he wouldn't mind Louis going up in his room and minding his own business if he had friends over.
He quickly entered the house and was thankful that the air conditioning was on and that the house was basically freezing. He grabbed a rag and ran it under cold water before he wrapped it around his neck.
It only took a minute for Louis to hear the noise that was coming from upstairs. He knew exactly what that noise was.
Sex.
He sighed and made his way up the stairs. Harry must not have heard Louis enter the house, otherwise he would have quieted down, rather than the moaning that practically could shake the wall next to him. He gave one quick bang to the door to notify him that someone was home. Harry’s noises quickly stopped. Louis was about to walk away once the noises settled down, but instead, Harry swung the door open, towel hanging off his waist. He didn’t bother to even hide the fact that someone — a guy — was laying in bed with the sheet up to his waist.
“What the fuck?!” Louis exclaimed.
“Louis — I — I,” Harry started, stuttering. Louis quickly ran into the bathroom and emptied his stomach into the toilet. He wasn't sure if it was from the sushi or due to the fact that Harry — his roommate — was fucking a guy. What the actual fuck.
He locked himself in his room and ignored Harry’s knocks at the door. He then ignored Harry’s dozens of text messages and phone calls.
He just caught Harry with a man. In bed. Fucking.
His roommate is gay. Or bi. He's not straight, at least, that’s for sure. What the fuck did he do to deserve walking in on that? That was disgusting and gross, and that, for sure did not sit well in Louis’ stomach. Not one bit.
Louis eventually checked his phone but didn't open up any of Harry’s messages to him. Instead, he called Liam, who was at his girlfriend’s house. He figured that he and her must be doing the same thing that Harry and Mystery Man were doing — but in a normal sense. Well, normal to him at least.
Liam actually picked up his phone, much to Louis’ surprise.
“What’s up, man?” Liam said. Clearly tipsy.
“I need you home. We need to talk.”
“Okay, why?”
“Just. Home. Now. Please,” Louis said. “And, just to top it off, your sushi made me sick and I’m already home.”
Click.
Liam arrived home thirty minutes later, tipsy, as Louis suspected on the phone call. He sat down on the edge of Louis’ bed while Louis sat against the head of the bed.
“Harry was having sex tonight.”
“Okay, and?” Liam asked curiously. He was well aware that Harry has had sex in the past.
“With a man.”
“Okay?” Liam said. Louis didn't reply. “And?”
“I think I need to move out, Liam.”
“Woah, Tommo. Wait on that, mate. Wait on this conversation until tomorrow. We’ll talk tomorrow morning when Harry goes out for his run. I’m too drunk for this conversation.”
“You’re always too drunk, Liam. Whatever. Go to bed. Good night,” Louis said, snipping at him.
And on that note, Liam left.
God, Louis couldn't believe that he was living with Harry Styles - - who was just having sex with a man. What an awful thing to do. He’s going straight to hell.
His thoughts stunned him a bit. He never thought that he was a homophobe. He’s flirted with guys at work as if it was nothing. He’s seen couples of all combinations make out and he never once felt disturbed. Hell, it was their decision. He couldn't place why he was just so mad at Harry for this.
Liam gently woke Louis up at 10am. Harry was at work at this point in the day, and Liam figured that this was a safe hour to wake Louis up. He sat at the edge of Louis’ bed as Louis’ eyes blinked open. When he saw it was Liam, he groaned and rolled over.
“Lad, I’m up. Let’s talk,” Liam said, softly. He was met with a pillow to his face.
“I was up all night puking, don’t talk to me,” Louis said, in an attempt to get Liam to leave him alone.
“Puking why?”
“Because Harry slept with a guy”
“Or was it the sushi I made?”
“Shut up,” Louis snapped. He sat up and crossed his arms. “I need to move out. Today. I can’t be in the same house as him.”
“And why is that?”
“Because he’s gay.”
“You guys are best friends.”
“Were, Liam. We can’t be friends now. Nope.”
“Says the one who I am sure flirts with gay guys while he’s working all the time.”
“But that’s for money,” Louis groaned. “That’s different.”
“Is it, Louis? Is it different?”
“Yes! I don't have sex with them! Harry probably didn't even know them that well. What a fucking loser. Ha! Yes! Let’s have gay sex! Let’s do it! With a stranger!”
“You’ve had sex with people you didn't know,” Liam said, flatly.
“With women.”
“You are fucking ignorant as bollocks,” Liam said before throwing the pillow that was previously thrown at him back at Louis. “What a fucking prick you are.”
“Great. Now you’re mad at me too! Wonderful!”
“Are you fucking joking, Louis? You really honestly think that Harry having sex with whoever he wants is awful? Fine! Think that! You can’t move out over his decisions on what to do with his body. It’s not affecting you, is it?!”
“No.” Yes. “Not at all.” Yes. He wasn’t sure why, but he just wanted to curl up in the corner and bawl his eyes out. He wanted to grab Harry and rip his chest open and just cry. He felt lied to and betrayed in so many ways.
“Alright lad. Now. You can’t move out. Then our rents go up and then we can’t pay, so you have to stay,” Liam said, trying to reason with him.
“I won’t today. You know I wouldn’t screw you over like that. I know some people would though.” Liam’s only comment was an eye roll before he walked out the door.
God. How couldn't he have known that Harry liked guys in that way too? He knew so much about him, except that. They never had a conversation about who they like or what their sexuality was. It just never came up. Maybe Harry wasn't even supposed to be out yet and it was just supposed to be a one night stand. Fuck. Did he just fuck up Harry’s coming out by basically walking in on him banging some dude? Fuck. He fucked up. He should’ve stayed at work.
He managed to fall asleep, but was awoken when the foot of his bed dipped down. He rubbed his eyes and looked at the edge of the bed, just to find a bloodshot-eyed Harry who had disheveled hair and his lips raw from biting it.
God. Even when he’s basically broken he’s beautiful. Louis groaned quietly. Wait. What the fuck?
“Why does everyone feel the need to wake me up today, hm?” Louis asked, closing his eyes again mid-sentence.
He felt a little movement on the edge of the bed and figured it was Harry shrugging.
“What do you want?” Louis said. He wouldn't even say his name anymore. He refused to.
“I mean — I can go,” Harry said, moving closer to the edge of the bed.
No. Stay. Louis didn't say anything out loud, though.
“I’m — I’m just sorry, okay?” Harry said, his voice cracking at the end of his sentence. “I didn't tell you, I know. I’m sorry. Just. Yeah. I’ll leave.” He got up from the bed and left the room, gently closing Louis’ door. But, for some reason, Louis wished that he had just stayed.
Louis stayed in his bed for another hour before Liam came in. He had no plans to get out of bed today, honestly. He was up all night thinking and vomiting, and was quite exhausted from that alone. And now, he was worrying about Harry, even though he’s gay.
Louis was the first one to talk. Liam had sat on a chair in his room for fifteen minutes, staying silent, before Louis finally broke it.
“Did I hurt him?”
Liam said nothing in return. He let Louis sit there in the room with him, door locked.
“Did I?”
Again, nothing. Louis hid his head in his hands and let the tears roll down.
“I fucked up. I fucked up, that’s it. I fucked up and I’m a shitty friend and a shitty roommate. He fucking slept with someone and I made him feel guilty about it. I just worry. I hate that he does that. Fuck. What the fuck is wrong with me, Liam?”
Liam put a gentle hand on Louis’ back and rubbed it in circles.
“You’re alright, lad. He’s good. I didn’t tell him what you said.”
“I don’t know why I said those things, Liam. Fuck. Fuck!”
“I don’t know. Are you jealous or something?”
Louis head snapped up at Liam.
“Do you think I’m gay, Liam?! Fuck no.”
Maybe. I don’t know. Am I?
“I don’t know, are you?”
Louis stuck his tongue in his cheek and shook his head — not as a no, not as a yes. Liam got the message.
“Are you jealous or something?” Liam asked cautiously.
“I don’t know.”
Liam nodded and kept rubbing Louis’ back for a minute until he calmed down.
“It takes time.” And with that, Liam left the room to let Louis sit in his own thoughts for a bit.
Louis knew everything about Harry. They've discussed so much in the few years that he has known him. He knows that Harry is a psychology major because he wants to help children. He knows that Harry prefers the city to the beach because even though both are busy, the city at least has nice stores to shop in. Harry used to be a baker since one of the older women at the shop used to always give Harry a free cookie and it made him so happy and he wanted to pass that happiness onto others. Harry wanted to move into a nice house and have two dogs and a cat and three children. He wanted to go to vacation every year to a new place so that he could experience the world. He wanted to go onto graduate school to focus on childhood psychological development. God. He was so interesting. Louis hated that he was so harsh on Harry, even if it was only in his head.
God, all he wanted was Harry next to him in bed right now, so they could cry together and Harry could sit on Louis’ lap again and lean against his chest and they could tell each other that everything was going to be alright. He wanted to run his fingers through Harry’s curls and tell him that it was alright and that he wasn't mad. He was just surprised. And maybe slightly jealous . He thought that Harry deserved better than a one night fuck. He deserved a long love and a careful partner who wouldn't hurt him. He needed someone to tell him that it is cute every time he crinkles his nose up and he needed someone to keep him warm during Winter. He needed a late night study partner who would quiz him on some crazy psychology terminology. He needed someone to throw popcorn at him during the scary part of the movie in the dark just to scare him a bit more. He needed someone who would push him against the wall and kiss him passionately and hold his hips so that he was just focusing on the kiss rather than keeping his body on the ground. He needed someone to be there for his midnight meltdowns and early morning runs and stupid kale smoothies. He needed someone who would actually water his plants when he's gone so that they aren't all dried up and crusty when he comes back home.
He doesn't deserve a one night love.
Fuck.
Louis knew he was in too deep at that moment. He contemplated screaming into the pillow — or suffocating himself with it. Instead, he shot a quick text to Harry and asked him to come in so that they could talk.
Harry cautiously entered the room, looking a bit better than earlier today. His hands were shaking, but he didn't want to let Louis see that, so he sat on his hands.
“I’m sorry for banging on your door last night and for anything I may have said or done last night,” Louis said. He immediately bit down on his lip. He knew that must have been all that Harry did last night considering that his lip was still bright red and raw in the middle.
“Me too,” was all that came out of his mouth.
“God, Harry, why are you apologizing?” Louis asked softly.
“I didn't tell you I’m gay,” Harry said under his breath. He hasn't made eye contact with Louis since he walked in.
“You didn't have to.”
Harry just nodded. Louis moved up next to Harry and sat next to him. Both of their heads were bowed down, Louis’ thumbs twiddling while Harry continued to sit on his hands. Silence.
“I just — You don't deserve one night stands,” Louis said softly. He brushed his thumb against Harry’s thigh, not to tease him, but to comfort him. “You deserve so much better than that, and you knew that.”
“I wanted sex, Louis. I wanted to fuck. It wasn't about love. It was about a nice fuck from a guy that was hot and we were both tipsy and comfortable. That’s all,” Harry said defensively. Harry wasn't sure why he was defensive or why he thought Louis was accusing him of something awful. He wasn't sure why he felt guilty for sleeping with somebody — somebody else.
Fuck.
“I just worry, that’s all,” Louis said. He bit his tongue after so more wouldn't follow that, like how he knows Harry so well and knows that he would prefer a long, sweet lovemaking session rather than a quick, dirty fuck.
“Louis, stop. Shut up!” Harry snapped. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at him, this time.
Those blue eyes were one of Harry’s absolute weaknesses.
“Make me, Harry,” Louis said, challenging him.
The tension rose in the room as both of them looked at each other; Harry’s green eyes made Louis’ stomach flip — in a good way. And, as always, Harry loved the crystal blue of Louis’.
“Make. Me.”
With that, Harry leaned his forehead against Louis’. Louis gasped softly and closed his eyes. Harry’s lips pressed against his and Harry’s hands guided him back. Louis was laying down, Harry sitting on his thighs, leaning against him, just like how they were the other day.
Fuck.
Louis wrapped his fingers in Harry’s curls and eagerly met Harry’s lips every time that Harry pulled away and re-pressed his lips against his again. Louis definitely did not mind that Harry was gay, especially when he was kissing him. He, for sure, did not mind Harry kissing him, one bit. He loved every second of it.
A soft moan escaped from Louis’ lips before Harry pulled away and sat up, afraid that he made Louis uncomfortable. Louis simply patted his chest — an invite for Harry to lay back down on top of him. Harry did so, his head resting comfortably on his chest.
“You deserve so much better than last night,” Louis said softly, his fingers still twirling Harry’s curls around.
“Show me what I deserve, Louis. Show me,” Harry said, his eyes closed. Both men were fully relaxed.
Louis wanted to blurt out something, but he held back.
“Maybe one day, Harry.”
“Listen.” Harry sat up, still on Louis’ thighs. It kept him laying there and still so that he could listen to Harry and not get up and leave. “Listening?”
Louis nodded.
“I think I may have feelings for someone in this house, and it’s not Liam. And I know that this sucks and probably is a sucky situation and I don't know what to do, Louis. I don’t. I don't want to move out, I don't want you to move out. I want to stay with you, Louis. Be mine. Let me be yours. I don’t want you uncomfortable though. And I realize I may have just fucked everything up and may now have to move out. But, I needed to tell you because, God, Louis, I can’t stand living with you and you not knowing. I tried making it obvious but I guessed you weren’t into me. Hell, I don’t even know if you are into guys. I don’t know and I’m going out on a ledge here, but I need to know. Do you like you the way that I like you?”
Louis blinked. God. Yesterday he was mad at Harry for being gay, and now he was questioning if he, himself, was. Liam did point out a good point earlier. Louis actually wasn’t mad that he was gay. He was mad because he wasn't with him. He didn't really give two shits if Harry was gay. He just wanted Harry to be gay with him and only him. That’s all he wanted. He just wanted Harry.
“Are you —“
“Louis Tomlinson. Answer the question.”
“I — I think so,” Louis said, his voice soft. He paused for a moment and looked up at Harry. Everything came back to him. Every single feeling he has ever felt for Harry in the past two and a half years came back. The time that Harry was upset because he dropped his ice cream cone and Louis let him have his and Harry was the happiest one in the park. The time that Harry failed his psychology test and contemplated dropping out of school because he was convinced he wasn't good enough. Louis hated seeing him hurting. The time that his sister came over the house crying because her boyfriend broke up with her and Harry almost went out to punch the fucker who made her cry. The time that Liam went away for the weekend and they were home alone together and got drunk and partied all night together, enjoying themselves. The time that Harry was named president of the psychology honor society and Louis even attended the reception dinner, even though Harry told him he didn't have to. The time that Louis came home crying because some guy at the bar was nasty to him and Harry sat up with him while he regained composure. The nights that Louis came in late and saw a peaceful Harry laying in bed. Every moment made his heart flutter a bit or made his heart sink. Everything was with Harry. “Yes. Yes. I do.”
Harry nodded, a smile growing on his face. Louis’ cheeks turned a deep red.
“So, Louis Tomlinson, what do you say? Can we be official yet or are you too chicken?”
Louis laughed and nodded. He wasn’t confused anymore. He knew that he loved seeing Harry happy and successful and he only ever felt wonderful next to Harry. He wanted to curl up next to him and enjoy the warmth that his body provided. He wanted to wrap his arms around him at night and kiss him on the cheeks and the forehead and the nose and the lips — everywhere. And, now, neither had to keep their alarms and safe-night check-ons a secret.
They could just be happy. They could be happy at home — together.