Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’s a beautiful day in the chaos that is the Borderlands, the sun is shining and the crowd gathering outside Moxxxi’s is murmuring, so Mad Moxxi puts on her brave face, ready for another day of running her bar, or so she thought, as she throws another one of her flirty innuendos at another set of ladies Moxxi sighs, is this the life she truly wanted? Running a bet while her favourite girls kill bandits, and gain fame? Yes Moxxi has her own fame, and it spreads across the world, but is it the same? Moxxi doesn’t think so as she grabs Her favourite SMGs and heads back to the bar, where she lets Lilith run the bar, with a wink and a word, Moxxi joins the world of vault hunting, gaining riches no one else would believe.

Heading into the headquarters of the Crimson Raiders, Moxxi heads straight for Tannis and Maya, who are just off chatting in the background about some raids and some science, and the two look over in Moxxi’s direction as the stunning beauty walks over to them “I need a backpack” the mature woman says as she tells the two her plan, and the two women are shocked but happy to help nonetheless, as Moxxi gets a considerably large bag, for all her future loot, and she heads out, mission in mind, and gun in hand.

As she leaves Sanctuary and most of her old life behind she can’t help but wander, is this the life she wanted? Is this the life she deserves? Or is this all but a daydream? There’s one thing for certain, it’s Moxxi’s life and she’s going to live it.

Chapter Text

It’s quite a warm day in the Borderlands as Moxxi is driving through the steam heated land of Three Horns Valley, as the wind is blowing through her hair all is well in the Borderlands, especially since she’s already ran over some bandits.

Arriving at the Bloodshot slums, Moxxi holds her bad touch SMG, as she tries to find some cover, sneakily of course because she doesn’t want to get shot, and she finally finds a place, hiding behind some raggedy old metal, which is hopefully enough to hold off a few bullets, and she begins counting her targets in her head, before alerting the whole camp with an elemental shot to some poor bandits head, which explodes in contact, knocking the lifeless corpse to the ground. But everyone knows where anoxic is now, so she’s got to be careful, but of course like any vault hunter, she won’t. As she guns down another set of bandits intent on ending the beautiful woman’s life, Moxxi reloads the vibrating gun, remembering the days when they used to have a different kind of fun in Moxxi’s paradise of a bedroom, but those days are over for now, she needs to save Roland, snd she’s eager too.

Killing the last of a useless bunch, Moxxi hears a whirr and she looks over at the stronghold entrance where the bridge is starting to drop, but that’s not all, a giant bandit holding a shield protected by midgets jumps out, shaking the earth as he lands, before another earthquake like shake happens when the bridge smashes into the ground, now Moxxi’s attention is on the shield holder, so she dives and combat rolls into cover, making sure to dodge the seemingly slow moving bullets, which is an easy task because they’re about as accurate as the bandit’s piss stream, so Moxxi pokes her head out of cover to get a better view, the giant nomad is calling out some really terrible insults while wasting his ammo, so Moxxi throws a ‘nade, which perfectly lands on a midget’s head, before knocking the nomad back a bit and exploding the poor midgets head but that doesn’t matter, they’re still a bandit, and all bandits must be dealt with, so with the now exposed gap they n the shield shining a light into killing the badass, Moxxi begins her first set of shots, which happily hit their target, causing him to stagger, that’s when the beautiful woman moves closer, dodging bullets, or at least not getting hurt by them thanks to her shield, that’s when she sees the height of bandit’s intellect, the badass nomad moves his only protection away from his body as he screams something stupid that Moxxi doesn’t listen to, she’s more focused on the now exposed body, where she sends a flurry of bullets, which mostly hit the stupid nomad, as he falls to the ground, lifeless and dumb. That’s when Moxxi hears some high pitched screams from the now free captive midgets, but a single shot kills one and Moxxi needs to reload, so she does, before using her fabulous legs to kick the last rampaging midget to death, which wasn’t difficult and she heads on inside, closer to finding Roland.

As the beautiful mature lady enters the filthy, foul smelling shithole that is Bloodshot Stronghold, Moxxi heads to one thing she knows for certain, she can sell her acquired loot at the vending machines inside, so after walking buy a machine that beeps into life, and shows a symbol on her echo, Moxxi heads to the big, green, ammo vending machine, buying some ammo, before she sells her useless guns, only useless because they did nothing to her though, and she gets a lot of dollars back in return, and she only just realised how profitable shooting a bandit can be, but that’s nothing to the wonderland of loot inside the vaults, so armed with her Maliwan SMGs, Moxxi begins her descent into the hellpit of the underbelly of the Bloodshot clan, and it’s a full place unfortunately, good for loot though.

Heading through the first set of rooms with an unnatural ease for a bar owner, Moxxi shoves every gun into her backpack, thinking about how magic these must be to store that many guns, and still have room for more, but that’s the reason why the vault hunters use them after all, so the white faced woman heads onwards, gunning down every miserable, manky midget, every pathetic psycho and every bulky bruiser, making sure no gun gets left behind, they are the best money makers after all, and kicking every lifeless body to make sure it doesn’t bite her in the ass, that’s when she gets to a high room, too high for any building she cares about, luckily for her there’s a circular ramp around the whole place, but unluckily for her, there’s also bandits scattered everywhere, and they’re intent on keeping Roland, so Moxxi sighs as she dives into cover, being chilled as the room cools her down, just enough that her nipples are on show if you move her luxurious jacket, but Moxxi doesn’t mind, all she minds is the bullets spraying around her cover.

Moving her gun round the corner, Moxxi looks down the sights, before locking onto an absolutely poor psycho, who is beginning his run towards her, only to be set alight by Moxxi’s Good Touch, and with a roar of screams, some pleasurable some not, the first of many drop down dead, that’s when more bullets start to smash against Miss Moxxi’s poor concrete cover, from all around the place, high and low, but Moxxi knows she has to go forward if there’s any hope in completing her mission so with her shield soaking up most of the bullets Moxxi heads forward, determined, as she lights yet another disgusting dickbag on fire, she heads up the ramp, using whatever she can for cover, but mainly letting her shield soaking up most up some hits, and the shots getting quieter and quieter as less and less bandits are alive to shoot at the wonderful woman, thanks to her favourite guns, eventually the large room silences, with the last bandit falling into a swirling black hole at the bottom of the room, that’s when Moxxi sees it, a lonesome toilet cubicle, just sitting there, so with her gun at the ready she opens the door, to find no one sitting there but another set of crappy guns, which she then bags before a garage looking metal sheet door opens, revealing one of the big baddies, amoxicillin is used to big baddies though, so without a second hesitation she begins firing her vibrating SMG at the party crasher, dropping him before he even gets a chance to shoot his rocket launcher, with a loud thump on the ground via a dead bandit’s body.

Gunning down more and more bandits who don’t seem to get the memo that they shouldn’t be here, Moxxi heads closer to her target, but Moxxi knows loot comes first in a vault hunting life, so she continues to just rip guns from dead loser’s hands, before finding something a bit special, a singularity grenade mod, that instantly gets equipped, but Moxxi knows loot is temporary, so she continues looting, shooting and figuring out how to open a certain cell door holding a fat red chest that looks like it’ll explode with loot, that’s when Moxxi sees Roland, and she rushes over and barely even given a chance to speak before the wall behind him gets smashed down by Hyperion’s robots and he gets dragged, but Moxxi does her best to chase down the transporter bot, leading to a whole new area.