Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was undeniable that her and Bob’s relationship had only gotten closer since the whole Void incident.

When she said they’d stick together, she’d meant it. Right after moving to the Watchtower, the two of them decided to stay on the 12th and 13th floors. Yelena had always  loved the number 13 for its spooky vibe and Bob just kind of went along with her, still choosing the one that was closer to the ground. The Thunderbolts – or The New Avengers spent the first few erratic weeks going back and forth between small missions, interviews, PR training sessions and tactical meetings. It was exhausting really, but she started liking those days. Not because of all her superhero duties, but because, when she got home (it was weird to think of the Tower as home), Bob was there reading some book or watching some silly reality-TV show. He’d always stop what he was doing and walk up to her, asking her about her day and laughing along as she told him all about Valentina’s antics.

Slowly, they began opening up to each other. It all began when, one night, she’d had a terrible nightmare and was in the bathroom catching her breath. She heard a faint knock at her door, followed by someone calling her name – It was Bob, he’d heard her screaming. He asked if she was okay, if he could help and if she wanted him to come in. That night, she’d let him in. Soon enough, nights where they’d just stay up talking as something mindlessly played in the background became part of her routine. She opened up about Natasha, about how much she missed her sister and how coming back to her being gone had killed a part of her. He’d told her about his parents, about his benders in Miami, Malaysia, Berlin, Prague or pretty much wherever else he could get his hands on drugs.

What Bob had never told her much about were his past relationships. While they’d opened up about pretty much everything else to each other, love, romance, relationships… It was a complicated topic for both of them, and Yelena would never push him to talk about it unless he was ready. 

It came as no surprise to her when one day, while returning from the ice-cream parlor, a voice spoke to her right outside the Watchtower’s main doors.

“Hey!” She heard another woman yell out to her. “Yelena!”

They were superheroes, afterall, so she’d gotten used to the unwanted attention at this point. She wasn’t a dick like Walker, though. Sometimes she’d even give someone an autograph or pose for a picture. Today, she wasn’t feeling up for it.

“Sorry, no pictures today.” She replied absent-mindedly, not looking up from her phone, where she’d been reading yet another ridiculous article about their team being the B-Vengers. The doors closed shut behind her.

“I’m here to see Robert!” The voice said again, voice muffled by the glass, and it halted Yelena in her tracks.

She slowly turned around.

Bob’s identity had been kept a secret as much a secret from the public as possible. Valentina had even bribed a couple of publications to make sure that no one knew who he was, so no one could follow his trail to Malaysia and, ultimately, to the Sentry project and… the other guy. So whoever this person had either stalked them really good or… actually knew him? 

She was a crazy skinny lady. She was taller than Yelena, which made her look even skinnier. She had strawberry blonde hair going down to her shoulders and very beady light blue eyes. She wore an old hoodie with the logo from a band Yelena did not recognize, ripped jeans revealing some tattoos down her legs and very run-down boots. She was carrying a duffel bag over one shoulder and it looked so heavy, Yelena could have sworn it would break her in half.

Before she took the woman’s bait, she had to be careful, make sure she knew whoever this was.

“Robert?” She replied, making her way back towards the doors.

“Yeah!” The woman smiled as she approached. Her teeth were incredibly white and straight. “Reynolds.”

Shit.

“Who’s Robert Reynolds?” Yelena asked, trying to keep calm and focusing as much as possible on not allowing the muscles on her face to give anything away. This person could be dangerous.

The lady laughed.

“Come on!” She exclaimed. The woman’s voice was high-pitched and it immediately started getting on Yelena’s nerves. Perhaps she was being mean-spirited, but the whole situation was not what she had expected from a Tuesday afternoon. “The guy who’s always with you guys. Brown hair, brown eyes–” Bob’s eyes are blue, she thought to herself, an eyebrow raising in suspicion. “Lanky? From Sarasota Springs?” Shit, that part was actually true.

“And you are…?” Yelena asked.

“Lindy.” The woman said, as if Yelena had to obviously be familiar with her. “Lindy Lee.”

What Yelena did next could be heavily questioned.

“Oh!” She exclaimed, trying to deliver the best, most Oscar-worthy performance. She face palmed. “Of course! Lindy!” The woman’s smile beamed at her. “Come on in.” 

Yelena nodded to one of the guards, who opened the glass doors. The woman giddily stepped inside and hugged Yelena – which she very much hated.

“Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!” Lindy told her mid-embrace, there was a faint ghost of alcohol in her breath. She pulled away and squatted a little to be at Yelena’s eye-level. Rude. “I knew he’d talk about me to you guys. I mean, how could he not, right?” She motioned to herself.

Yelena gave the fakest laugh ever known to mankind and led Lindy inside. The woman did not shut up for the entire time, even as they waited for the elevator. Once they stepped inside, Yelena turned back to her.

“Ice cream?” She rudely interrupted Lindy, who looked a bit offended.

“Uh, chocolate?” She raised an eyebrow. “No, thanks.” 

Yelena laughed and pushed the ice-cream into the woman’s face. Lindy yelled and raised her hands, trying to get it from her eyes.

“What are you doing, you crazy–” Yelena had limited space, but she managed to slide a leg behind Lindy’s, and sweep kick her to the floor. She quickly grabbed her gun from the back of her pants and hit the taller woman with the butt of the gun, knocking her out. 

Yelena pressed the button to the 28th floor, where Valentina had a couple of holding cells built just in case and tapped her ear-piece. 

“Lena to all Thunderbolts, do you guys copy?” 

A steady flow of ‘copies’ later, Bob’s being the last, but followed by an “everything okay?”, the elevator dinged and the doors opened. She grabbed both of Lindy’s arms and began dragging her down the hall. 

“Need everyone on the 28th, we have a situation.” She told them. “I’ll elaborate when you get here.” With that, she kicked one of the cell doors open and dropped Lindy’s arms. She gently kicked the other woman.

“You alive?” She asked. Lindy groaned, arms one again reaching for her face to clean off the remainders of ice-cream. 

“Bitch.” She mumbled.

Yelena nodded, getting the duffelbag from the other woman’s arms and walking out of the cell, quickly closing and locking it behind her. She fumbled a bit with the controls, but also managed to tint the enclosure’s glass and to enable the soundproofing. She couldn’t risk Lindy hearing or seeing them, in case she was indeed a threat. She sat down in one of the benches and opened the woman’s bags, searching for anything useful.

The elevator doors opened again, revealing Ava.

“What’s the situation?” Her friend asked, approaching her.

Yelena grabbed a wallet and phone from Lindy’s things and threw the bag at Ava.

“Look for anything suspicious.” She told her as Ava grabbed the bag mid-air.

“Great, if there were a bomb in here I’d be a goner, but thanks, Belova.”

“No bomb, I already checked.” She replied, going through the loose change and credit cards in Lindy’s wallet. There was an ID, which she quickly looked at.

“Did you find this in the garbage?” Ava asked as she lifted up what looked to be some used underwear. “Whose is this?”

She wasn’t lying. Yelena had seen plenty of fake IDs and this wasn’t one of them. Credit cards also confirmed it. Her name was Lindsay Lee and she was also natural to Sarasota Springs, Florida. Yelena raised an eyebrow.

John and Alexei arrived next.

“Bucky’s in congressman duty today.” John told them. “Hope we’re enough.” He stopped and looked at Ava’s disgusted expression going through the bag. “Whose bag is that?”

“I have no clue, she won’t spit it out.” Ava snarked.

“Everything okay, solnyshko?” Alexei asked her. “These are not yours, yes?”

“Everything’s fine, dad.” She said, attempting to unlock Lindy’s phone. It was ridiculously easy, since it didn’t even have a passcode. “Where’s Bob?” 

Walker shrugged and knelt down next to Ava, grabbing a passport from the bag.

“Who’s Lindsay Lee?” He asked Yelena. Ava and Alexei got closer to him. “Is this her stuff?” 

As if on cue, Yelena began hearing screams down the hall, coming from Lindy’s cell. That was the one fault in their soundproofing – it only worked one way.

“Jesus Christ! Is that Lindsay Lee?” Walker stood up and began walking down the hall.

“Hey, leave her.” Yelena warned, standing up and following him, as did Ava and Alexei. Lindy was… normal, her photos revealing rock concerts, a shitton of drinking and reminiscing on high-school days. She was no cheerleader, but she seemed to have fun. 

“Please tell me you didn’t kidnap a civilian.” Ava pleaded.

“Lena wouldn’t do that, that woman must be big threat. What do we do, Lena?” Her dad defended her.

“Okay, everyone shut the fuck up!” Yelena yelled, just as Walker disabled the tint of the cell, Lindy appearing to them clear as day. She had a black eye and her face was still smeared with ice cream.

“Please tell me that’s not shit.” Walker said.

Lindy began knocking on the glass and cursing at Yelena as soon as their eyes met.

“Give me back my phone, you dickhead!” Lindy screamed. “Where the fuck is Bob?” She now roared.

“Where the fuck is Bob?” Yelena looked around. As she swiped to the next image, there he was.

It was an old photo. A photo of a photo, perhaps, but it was definitely him. His features were softer, younger, but he did seem much sadder, huge dark circles under his eyes and a half-smile that conveyed no emotion at all. Lindy was next to him, kissing his cheek. Yelena bit the inside of her cheek as she felt a sting of pain in her stomach. 

“Bob?” Walker questioned. “How does she know him?” 

“Oh, I see. This could be really, really bad.” Ava said, always the quickest thinker.

The elevator dinged once more and Bob came jogging down the hallway, his wet hair sticking to his forehead and his loose sweater all crinkled, as if he’d put it on in a hurry. His eyes found hers and a worried expression came over him.

“Hey, sorry, sorry! I– I was showering. I– Is everything okay?” He asked her.

Just as he stepped in front of the glass, all eyes turned to him. He furrowed his brow. When he turned to the cell, his eyes met Lindy’s. She gleamed when she saw him. 

“Bobby!” She exclaimed. “This crazy bitch threw me in a cell. I told her I know you!”

His expression was undecipherable.

“Hey.” Yelena spoke. Bob’s eyes shifted to hers.

“What is she doing here?” Bob asked her.

“So… you know her?” Walker asked.

“I do… I… I did, actually.” Bob nodded, eyes still looking at Yelena.

“Can we trust her, Bob?” Alexei asked. “Or is she big threat?”

Before Bob could respond, Lindy banged on the glass again.

“Hey!” She pleaded with Bob, but he still held Yelena’s gaze. “Bobby pleeeease let me out! I came to see you! I missed you soooo much.” 

His eyebrows perked up in surprise and Yelena could feel her stomach churning. Bob looked at Lindy again. Stepping closer to the glass.

“Can she hear me?” He asked, the others denied. “Let me talk to her.” 

Walker nodded and disabled the soundproofing on Lindy’s side.

“Hey.” Bob said, simply.

“Hey, Bobby…” She said, voice so…. fond? Yelena didn’t buy it for a second.

“Okay, we’re out of here.” Ava said, grabbing John’s arm despite his protests and motioning for Alexei to come as well. 

“Lena, are you coming?” Alexei asked.

All eyes turned to her, except for Bob’s who were still glued on Lindy – in spite of hers already deadly glaring at Yelena from behind the glass.

“Bob?” Yelena asked him. 

“You…” His eyes darted down at his hands, where he’d been fidgeting with a teal hair tie Yelena had given him a few weeks back. Then they moved back up at Lindy, who met his gaze. “It’s okay, Lena.” He nodded. “You can go.” 

She wouldn’t admit it if she had a gun pointed to her head, but those three words were… painful to hear. It was stupid, she knew. He didn’t need her to be there, Bob could take care of himself and Lindy wasn’t a real threat. Still, she hoped he’d ask her to stay – or even better, to kick Lindy out once and for all. They stuck together, didn’t they? 

Yelena breathed a bit more heavily than she had anticipated and nodded, not daring to look back at either Bob or Lindy.

“Okay.” She turned around. “Let’s go, everyone.”

Her eyes met Ava’s as they began making their way back down the hall. When they walked inside and the doors began to close, she looked at Bob, who had stepped closer to the glass and seemed to be enthralled in conversation with Lindy. Her dad and Walker joked about the situation and noted on her ice-cream stained face.

“Hey.” Ava approached her, leaning back against the wall next to her. Yelena averted her gaze. “You okay?” 

“Yeah.” She nodded firmly. “Why wouldn’t I be?” 

Ava didn’t push.

Still, Yelena couldn’t get the image of Lindy kissing Bob’s cheek out of her head. Nor the way his eyes were glued to hers, the way he’d stepped closer to the glass, his hand beginning to move up, as if he were reaching for her. Her brow furrowed at the memories and her stomach churned. She didn’t trust Lindy one bit, the woman’s patronizing and annoying behavior enough to get on her nerves. She felt stupid. She really did. But… She was worried about him, that’s all.

Chapter Text

Bob had his fair share of ghosts. They mostly came to him in silence. When the silence got too much, they were his only company; in times when he felt completely alone, when the Void was too deep to fill, when not even the strongest drugs were enough to pump him through another day, they’d show up. Unfortunately, as it is expected from ghosts, they were far from kind.

Reminiscing about his childhood, there weren’t friends coming over to his house, siblings or cousins to play with, no neighbors to run across the lawn or play baseball with. His classmates thought he was odd: always wearing long-sleeves in spite of the boiling Florida summer, never attending any birthday parties, nor having them himself, never hanging out with them at the beach even during summer break. No one ever dared to get too close.

As middle school began, his best friend quickly switched from the one little mouse that had been living in his room (and whom his father had mercilessly “gotten rid of”) to one Mrs. Silvers, the pharmacist who’d let him buy pills for his mom without ever asking for any prescriptions. From age 12, his memories were hazy – no distinct names or events, the only constant in his life being always coming home to his father’s unstoppable anger and his mother’s evergrowing resentment.

When he was 15, though, he could say he made a ‘friend’. A new  family moved into the house across the street. The parents had recently gone through a divorce and, while dad and his new wife stayed back in Tampa in their fancy apartment, the three kids had moved back to their hometown with their mother, forced to exchange a life of luxury for living in a two-bedroom house in a low-income neighborhood.

Lindsay was a year younger than him, red hair, blue eyes, lean and a bit tall for a girl her age. She was the most outgoing of the three Lee kids and… nice enough. She had walked up to talk to him the very week her family moved in, seemingly not caring about his long sleeves or his dark circles. It was a new feeling, the closest to comfort he’d felt in a long while. 

In little time, Bob had gotten to know all about her terrible relationship with her younger sisters, her grudge against her mother for having been dumped for a younger, more beautiful woman, her admiration for her dad. Arriving halfway through the school year and not being welcomed into any cliques wasn’t an easy task either, so she orbited her neighbor and senior as much as she could. 

She never asked him questions either. She never questioned his bruises, the cigarette burns in his arms, nor the black eyes he’d show up with every now and again. A part of him believed she never even noticed them, another believed that she actively chose to ignore them. And while others may have been bothered, for him, it was a relief. He could be close to someone without having to open up, to let them in. It was just… easier this way. 

He couldn’t remember how they started properly dating, if he could even call it that. When he was with Lindy, there was never silence, never any ghosts. So when they began lurking their heads in, the two of them just decided to start making out. They were teenagers, high off their minds, dealing with the craziest, horniest hormones ever and clinging to the smallest crumbs of affection they couldn’t find in their broken families. It felt very wrong, but somehow inevitable.

Through his foggy memories, Bob could still see her clear as day. She was ambitious, she wanted him to join the football team, for the two of them to win prom royalty, for him to ask for her hand in marriage as soon as they left high school… Needless to say none of those ever came to fruition. She never hid her frustration and never spared him of anything mean she had to say.

The breakup hadn’t been pretty, much like the entirety of their ‘relationship’. When Bob eventually dropped out in his sophomore year of high school, she was furious. But her anger landed on deaf ears: Bob was getting the fuck away from that town. He managed to swipe a couple of 50 dollar bills from his dad’s wallet and bought himself a ticket to the furthest place 100 bucks could take him – New York.

He left one night without ever saying goodbye to her, to his parents, to anyone. Even still, he never got a phone call, letter, nor e-mail, and neither did anyone ever come looking for him. As the years dragged on, their ghosts were all that remained. Little by little, he detached himself more and more from them. By the time he’d gotten his new chance at life with his new team, he was sure no ghosts would ever catch up to him.

Thirteen years after he’d left Florida, he walked down a hall in the Watchtower to find himself face to face with a ghost. Only she didn’t look dead, decrepit and monstrous as most of them did in his memories. She had the same old red hair, blue eyes and a bunch of… brown stuff all over her face. 

“I’m so happy to see you again, Bobby…” Lindy said tenderly and pressed her hand to the glass. “You’ve grown into your looks.” 

Bob was speechless. Truly.

“What…” he began. “What are you doing here, Lindy?”

“I already told you, silly!” she exclaimed. “I saw you on the news and I had to come find you. I haven’t heard from you in… what? Six years?”

“Thirteen.” he corrected her a bit too quickly.

“Oh, yeah. I was blipped… So, time gets all weird…” she shrugged, laughing it off.

“Yeah, so was I.” he replied, nodding.

Lindy’s face seemed to fall at his response, she gave him an uncomfortable grin. His eyes darted down to the teal hairband Yelena had given him. His hands had always been fidgety, but Lena had assured him playing with it was much healthier than picking at his fingers. He agreed. It was far less painful and… teal reminded him of her, it was the color of the nice eyeliner she always had on–

“Hey!” Lindy tapped on the glass, Bob’s eyes darted back up at her. “Earth to Bobby?” he gave her a weak smile. “Can you let me out of here? It’s like getting super hot and the AC’s not on.”

“Uh, sure.” Bob agreed and opened the cell door for her.

As soon as he did, she jumped into him and wrapped her arms around him in a ‘bear hug’, something she’d sworn was their thing back in high school – and which he had no recollection of. When they parted, Lindy stayed close to him. A bit too close for comfort, even stepping back with him when he tried to put some distance between them.

“So, hum… W-What can I do for you, Lindy?” he questioned her.

“Oh, come on!” she playfully punched him in the arm. Her brows furrowed as she did so. “I’m here to catch up.”

“You’re thirteen years too late, I’m afraid.” he replied, rather dryly. Fuck, that was very rude. “I mean, thanks for coming, but… do you need anything?” he managed to blurt out.

Lindy’s mouth opened and shut abruptly. He could practically pinpoint the moment when a lightbulb lit up in her head. She looked up at him through her eyelashes.

“Actually, I need a place to crash for like… two days or so?” she batted her eyelashes. “I was staying at an Air BnB, but this dude kind of canceled on me all of a sudden. So… could I crash at your place?”

“M-My place?” Bob asked.

“Yeah, silly! I would have gone straight there, but I didn’t have your address. And when I saw you on TV the other day, I figured you were working here with the B-Vengers–”

“It’s The New Avengers, actually –” he corrected her.

“– Yeah, whatever.” she shrugged. “So I came here to find you.” she smiled. “So, what do you say?”

The idea of having Lindy over at ‘his place’ was terrifying. One thing about Bob’s ghosts was that he liked – loved, actually – keeping them as far away as possible. And keeping them just like that: as ghosts. 

“I’m sorry, Lindy, but there’s… I have… there’s no room in my… my apartment.” he gently nodded. Real smooth, Bob.

Lindy’s mouth turned into a mischievous smile.

“Well, that doesn’t have to be a problem, does it?” she took one of his wrists in her hand and started playing with Yelena’s hair tie. “We could share the bed, you know?  Like old times…”

Jesus Christ. Bob vehemently shook his head.

“No, sorry. No can do.”

She dropped his wrist and looked up at him.

“Then can’t I stay here?” she asked, blatant annoyance in her voice. “Don’t your super-powered friends have an extra room I could sleep in? Or is that too much to ask for too, Bobby?”

Bob remembered this side of her a bit too well. Pushy, persistent, spoiled, annoying. He was hoping thirteen years would be enough to change it. He looked back down at Yelena’s hairband. What would Yelena Belova do? That had been his motto for a few months now. He breathed in, breathed out, and looked up at her once more, shaking his head.

“It is, actually, Lindy. Especially considering I haven't heard from you in thirteen whole years.” he said, “Also, weren't you the biggest Iron Man fan back in the day? You know superheroes pretty well. They’re very, very strict with their boundaries and their living quarters.”, she took a step back, crossing her arms over her chest. “Also, only New Avengers personnel are allowed in the building…” he felt himself growing more confident as Lindy's silence persisted. The lights in the hallway began to flicker gently. Lindy looked around, eyebrows raising in suspicion. “And only members of the New Avengers can use the facilities, which means that would break protocol. So no can do, Lindy.”

Lindy sighed, rolled her eyes and began making her way to her duffel bag on the floor, mumbling all the way through. Holy shit, Lindy had accepted defeat. Yeah, he couldn't wait to tell Lena about this. And his psychologist too, of course.

She slowly stopped in her tracks and turned around, looking up at Bob.

“Your hair is wet.”, she stated.

Huh?

“Uh, yeah?”, he replied.

“Only personnel are allowed in,” She repeated his words back to him. “And only members of the New Avengers can use the facilities.” Fuck. Her light blue eyes pierced through him. “It’s 82 degrees outside, Bobby. How’s your hair wet?”

He swallowed hard, eyes averting hers. Lindy began to stand up and step closer to his direction. Bob stepped back, but his breath had started to pick up, panic rising in his chest.

“And if you work here… why are you wearing sweatpants?” She questioned him once more. “And no shoes…”

All the lights in the room began to flicker at an even faster rate. Bob closed his eyes. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in.

“Oh.” Lindy whispered. “I see.”

“Leave, Lindy.” Bob breathed. In. Out. In. Out.

“But, Bobby, I can’t.” her voice turned tender, pleading with him. “I have nowhere else to go.”, he could feel her getting closer. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out– “Besides, I missed soooo much.”, she raised her hand up to caress his cheek.

All the lights in the room exploded as soon as she touched him. The sprinklers went off, an alarm began blaring from the direction of the elevator. Bob opened his eyes to find Lindy staring at him, eyes wide in amazement, smiling from ear to ear. Somehow he knew his eyes were burning gold.

“I knew it.”, she dropped her hand from his cheek. “I always knew you were destined for greatness, Bobby.”

He felt his cheeks burning, but quickly shook his head. She’s lying, a voice muttered in his head, all you’ve ever been is a failure, Robert. He walked away from her and headed to the elevator. Lindy quickly followed him, hastily grabbing her bag from the floor. 

“So…?” she asked him when they stepped inside. Bob pressed the button to the rooftop.

“I’ll see what I can do.” he told her, still averting her gaze, eyes focused on Yelena’s hair tie.

Valentina was furious. Bob could swear that if she were a cartoon character, fumes would be coming out of both her ears. Weirdly enough, she and Lindy seemed to get along well.

“They’re the same person.” Mel had whispered to him while the two other women endlessly yapped in front of them. “My God…”

Bob felt awful for her. Mel had to fetch a bunch of NDAs, draft contracts, run tests. Valentina said they had to make sure word of Bob’s powers would never leave Lindy’s mouth, no matter what. 

“Name your price, Lindsay, dear.”, Valentina told her, leaning on the desk in front of Lindy. “Whatever it is, we’ll provide.

The cost for Lindy, of course, was staying over at the Watchtower for an undisclosed amount of time. 

“Plus some money wouldn’t hurt.”, she added smugly. Valentina gave Lindy a fake smile, glaring at Bob as she did.

They wouldn’t provide her with her own room, though. All floors were already taken by the other team members and the vacant ones had been converted into all sorts of spaces, from tennis courts, to labs, to prisons. So she would be staying in his room. Great.

As soon as Lindy had settled in, he’d taken the stairs and fled as far away from her as he could. That meant he climbed up to the twentieth floor, where the TV room was. He needed some time to think. 

He couldn’t believe this was happening. Leaving all his unfinished business behind in Florida hadn’t been the smartest decisions, as he had come to understand after lengthy chats with his therapist, but it did him some good. Never seeing his parents again, never seeing Lindy. There were no strings attached to that god-awful town and all the god-awful things he’d endured while living there.

But the past doesn’t go away, Robert. That voice echoed in his head. You can’t run from it. From us. From me.

When he opened the doors to the TV room, it was dark but the TV was already on – an episode of the Bachelorette was playing; the air conditioner was so cold, Bob felt a chill down his spine. He didn’t need to see the figure curled up in a leopard print blanket to know exacty who it was.

“Close the door, please, thank you.” Yelena asked, absent-mindedly, eyes still glued to the TV. 

He smiled.

“Hey.”, he announced himself.

Yelena’s turned to him and she clicked the pause button on the remote.

“Hey.”, she replied, giving him a shy smile.

“Got room for one more?”, he asked, motioning to the blanket. “It feels like Siberia in here.” 

Yelena laughed and extended a bit of the blanket to him. Bob quickly joined her on the couch, slipping under it. It was just so warm.

“If you say so, Florida man.” They laughed. Ever since Yelena had discovered the existence of the Florida man phenomenon, the nickname had just stuck.

“What’s going on?”, Bob asked, motioning to the TV. “Did she eliminate Luke P. already?” 

Yelena shook her head.

“At this point, I think she’ll actually choose him." she said.

“Ugh.” Bob sighed.

“Ugh indeed.” she repeated, pressing play.

The two of them finished the episode in relative silence, only making a couple of funny remarks. For the first time in hours, which had felt more like days, Bob could feel himself relax, body sinking into the comfortable couch, breath steadying, drifting in and out of sleep. The faint sound of the TV playing in the back, Yelena’s tangerine perfume fragrant and fresh. He wished he could scoot a bit closer, tuck his head in her shoulder and drift to sleep in her presence. 

Stop it, Bob. He berated himself. She’s your best friend, you can’t fuck this up too, like you always do.

When the episode was over, Yelena turned to face him and he forcefully blinked himself awake.

“So…” she started. “Lindy?” 

Bob let out a deep sigh, closing his eyes. Lena clapped twice, soft yellow lights illuminated the corners of the room.

“Wanna talk about it?” she asked, coming to a sitting position, still wrapped around the blanket.

“She’s… she’s one of my exes,” he admitted. “She was my first girlfriend, actually.” 

“Yeah, I figured that much.” Yelena grabbed something from her back pocket. It was a tiny phone in a bright pink phone case, Lindy’s. Yelena showed him a picture. Bob’s eyes widened in disbelief.

It was him, his 15-year-old self, with an emo haircut and black eyeliner, dark circles under his eyes and a terrible looking purple hoodie. Next to him, Lindy was kissing his cheek. He swallowed hard.

“Wow...” was all he managed to say. 

“Terrible haircut.” she said with a laugh, Bob rolled his eyes. 

“Come on, it was cool back in the day.” he tried.

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that.” Yelena handed him the phone. “I took it with me when I left you guys, sorry about that. But I guess you can return it to her when you see her again.” 

“... Shouldn’t take long.” Bob replied, getting the device and slipping it into his own backpocket.

Yelena raised an eyebrow at him.

“She’s staying over.” he told her. “She… she doesn’t have anywhere else to stay, so… Yeah. Valentina assigned her to my room of all places.” Bob shook his head. “It was going well, actually—”

“Cool.” Yelena replied sharply, before he could finish. She abruptly stood up from the couch. “Good you have –” she circled her hand in his direction. “-- all that going for you.” She started making her way to the exit.

“Hey, Lena, wait–”

“Bob, listen…” she looked him dead in the eyes. “I’m happy for you.” He couldn’t pinpoint what, but something in her expression told him otherwise.

Before he could respond, she closed the door.

Chapter Text

She was avoiding Bob, there was no other way of putting it.

Since Lindy had moved into their home and, more specifically, into Bob’s room, Yelena could barely even look at him. She felt stupid, like a little girl with a crush who blushes and walks away whenever he gets close to her. The thing is: Yelena didn’t have crushes. Ever. In the Red Room, she was trained to be a seductress, capable of using her body to its fullest potential. She knew the ins and outs of kissing, having sex and all the other kinky shit. But it never meant anything. She never felt anything – other than deep regret and shame whenever she was done with any job that involved that sort of stuff.  

All of Yelena’s ‘relationships’ (if she could even call them that) had been nothing more than missions, all her partners, targets. ‘Sleep with X to get inside information’, ‘try to seduce Y to get into their personal computer’. Simple, matter of fact, no strings attached, no feelings involved. She would shut off her brain and get the job done. Outside of work, there had never been that longing she’d heard so many people talk about, the desire to be with someone, to kiss and hold hands and have a future with another person. That all sounded too sappy and unrealistic to her. Love itself was unrealistic to her, afterall, the people in her life didn’t stay.

She had also never felt… those… other things. Once she had an eight hour layover at the Vienna airport and decided to buy herself a book to kill time. She chose it by its cover and she wasn’t ashamed to admit it – Yelena hated owning ugly looking books –, not even taking the time to read the synopsis. When she began reading, it quickly became clear that it was some sort of forbidden romance between a thief and a hot, tall police officer. She was bored, but it was better than doing nothing on her phone for eight hours. But then came the… the sexy stuff. Yelena was disgusted by the descriptions of it. All the fluids and touching and names and– No. Absolutely not. She threw the thing in the trash and decided to buy herself some crosswords instead.

Sex was something that existed, sure, and she knew that a lot of people liked having it. But she wasn’t one of them. She had never felt compelled to do it. She did it for work, but she barely remembered it afterwards. She was also capable of admiring people and recognizing when they were attractive, but that was pretty much it. There were no butterflies in her stomach, no lustful stares and yearns to touch another human being in that way.

That was until she met Bob.

It was frustrating, honestly. Whenever she was close to him, she couldn’t help but admire how soft and touchable his hair looked – especially when it was all fluffy and messy after he’d just woken up –, nor how pretty his smile was, or how his eyes were the darkest shade of blue she had ever seen, like the sky on a stormy night. She also found herself looking at him while they were training, admittedly more than once – way, way more. She looked at how toned his arms were and couldn’t believe how such an adorable looking man could have such huge thighs! Like, huge! She would never admit it out loud either, but she had also caught herself staring at his abs whenever he was doing his pull-ups.

At first, she thought nothing of it. Again, she was aware that Bob was a very attractive looking man. She had eyes. That was all it was: admiration for the human physique. That could be the end of it, if she didn't have a dream about him, a very explicit and not-PG-at-all sort of dream. She woke up the next day with a shame too unspeakable and with no courage to look Bob in the eyes. Unfortunately for her, he was very adamant to stay close to her the entire day, not helping in the replayability of her dream. From that day on, something shifted; something inside her changed.

Now Lindy Lee was back in Bob’s life and Yelena’s couldn’t be more miserable. Since the other woman’s arrival, Yelena had truly thrown herself back into work, accepting every little mission that came up. Whenever Bob asked her about it, she would just give him some half-assed excuse – Bucky was on congress duty, Ava had therapy, Walker was doing whatever. Bob never questioned her, he'd just tell her to “be safe out there” and she'd shoot him an “I can take care of myself”. There wasn't time nor privacy for much more, since Lindy was always there, clinging to Bob at every moment.

Now that she was back, the two of them seemed attached by the hip. She never left his side. She made sure the world knew Bob was back in her life too, always with at least two or three stories per day about their routine on the Watchtower. Yelena didn't follow her, of course. She just mostly stole either Bucky's or her dad's phones to check on Lindy's updates. She wasn't the only one, apparently. Lindy's videos on ‘living on the Watchtower as a staff member’ (the persona Mel and Valentina had created for her) were getting more and more views. They had also been great to shut down the rumors surrounding Bob's identity. He was staff like her, and people online were crazy for #Blindy. 

It was a perfect love story, great for PR and Yelena could see it: two middle-school sweethearts reconnecting after ‘getting hired’ for some superpeople. She hated it with every fiber of her being. Watching Lindy yap as Bob did the dishes or watching her get ready by putting on some of Bob's shirts… Yelena's throat felt like it was on fire by the sheer thought of it. She knew this was for the best. Bob deserved someone normal, someone who knew how to feel things and who wouldn't fuck it all up. He was too good for her. 

On a Friday evening, she found herself taking a shot of vodka alongside Bucky, Walker and her dad after having successfully stopped a bank heist and released all hostages.

“The Thunderbolts save the day once more!” her dad said, slamming her glass back onto the kitchen table.

“It’s the New Avengerz, dad.” she replied, wincing as the vodka burned its way down her throat.

“Still undecided.” Bucky corrected her, already reaching for the bottle and pouring them another round. 

As he did, the elevator doors opened, revealing a rather enthusiastic Ava. She had two big bags of booze in her hands and she danced her way over to the group as the others cheered for the new wave of alcohol that was about to hit them.

“D’you know what’s the only thing better than getting absolutely hammered on a Friday night?” Ava asked, setting the bags down on the counters. Bucky and Alexei were quick to put the drinks in the fridge.

“Let me guess,” Walker said “saving a bunch of civilians from a bank robbery?”

“Boooo, boring answer.” Yelena retorted, “I know–”

“Making love to beautiful women!” Her dad’s voice boomed and Yelena’s face instantly became as red as a tomato. The others laughed as she grunted.

“Dad, please, stop.” She tried, but the ship had already sailed.

As her dad tried to convince them and as Ava’s question got lost amongst the sea of laughter, the elevator doors opened once more and revealed a very uncomfortable looking Bob standing next to a very chatty Lindy Lee. He scurried out of the elevator and took a seat next to Yelena, immediately taking notice of her flushing.

“What did your dad say this time?” Bob whispered to her. Yelena’s insides felt like jelly at his question. She snorted and shook her head. 

“What’s so funny?” asked Lindy, wrapping her arms around Bob’s neck and standing behind him before Yelena could respond.

She could feel her face twitching at the interaction. That was a huge flaw of hers and she was well aware of it: terribly expressive. She quickly stood up and made her way over to the fridge, grabbing another bottle of vodka from the freezer. Before Alexei could reply to Lindy, Ava cut him off.

“Nothing, Linda.” she said. “Bob, you’ll know how to answer this one: what’s the only thing better than getting hammered on a Friday night?” 

Yelena poured herself and the others another round. Bucky shot her a warning glance. She ignored it.

“Wow, tough question, Ava.” Bob replied. “Can I get a hint?”

“Starts with letter K and Alexei likes it a bit too much.” Ava replied. Yelena noticed Lindy no longer had her arms around Bob. She'd taken Yelena's seat and was scrolling on her phone. Yelena tried not to think about how Lindy had now literally taken her seat, her place. She was being stupid and whatever was eating up her insides must have been the alcohol.

Once again, before Bob could respond, Alexei’s voiced thundered through the room:

“KARAOKE!”

Yelena jumped at her father's sudden burst and spilled vodka all over the counter, which was met with protests from Walker.

“Hey, hey, there’s more where that came from.” Ava, who was sitting next to him, looked him in the eyes and put one of her hands on his thigh. “Tonight we drink, sing and relax, how about that?”

Yelena raised an eyebrow at the interaction. It was now John’s turn to blush. The man nodded and mumbled something that made Ava laugh. Yelena glanced over at Bob, who looked giddy, like a toddler who’d just heard his parents say a bad word. Ever since the divorce was finalized, John and Ava had pretty gotten close and it was pretty clear to anyone watching. When Bob noticed Yelena looking at him, he gave her a small smile and looked downwards.

“I’ll drink to that.” said Bucky, taking his shot.

“Sorry, Ada,” they all turned to Lindy, who was still looking at her phone, “but Bobby is not a karaoke guy, so… I guess we’ll pass. Right–” she shrugged.

“Why don’t you let him decide that, Lindy?” Fuck. It was out of her mouth before she could even notice. Lindy shot her a fiery glare. “What do you say, Bob?” Yelena asked him.

Now all eyes turned to Bob, the poor thing looked like a deer in headlights. He looked up at Yelena, eyes pleading. Bob hated conflict. She was well aware of that. Besides the few instances when Sentry or the Void had shown up, he was the ultimate people pleaser, he'd do everything in his power to not piss anyone off. In this case, Lindy already looked pissed off as she urged Bob to answer. His eyes stayed on Yelena's, though. She gave him a small encouraging nod,to which he replied by standing up, which seemed to confuse Lindy.

He walked over to Yelena and got himself a glass from the ones she was pouring. He gave her a small smile and she did the same.

“You know, when I was in Southeast Asia, I actually stayed in Thailand for a while,” the others paid attention to him, but Bob's eyes were on hers– it was her he was telling this to, “and karaoke just so happens to be one of the national pastime activities."

“Does that mean…?” she asked him. The room was quiet, everyone waiting on Bob's response. He downed his shot and Yelena followed him.

“I actually love karaoke.” Bob replied, a goofy smile forming on his lips.

Cheers boomed through the room and Alexei picked Bob up bridal style, they all made their way to the TV room. As they did, Yelena smiled despite feeling Lindy’s glare still following her all the way from the kitchen.

One might expect a serum that turns you into a God-like creature with the power of a thousand exploding suns to make you somewhat immune to the effects of alcohol. For Bob, it did quite the opposite. All it took was a drink (two at most) to turn Bob into his drunk self – who the others had very creatively named Bobert. Bobert was the extroverted drunk, a side of Bob that Yelena had never even dreamed of seeing. He was outgoing, sure, but it was still Bob with his goofy sense of humor and golden retriever persona. Yelena found it endearing, perhaps a bit too endearing. Especially now that Bobert and her dad were singing their hearts out to Africa.

Yelena cheered for them as Bucky sat on her left playing Candy Crush on his phone and Walker sulked on her right – they had all immediately shut down his attempts at rapping. Ava was queuing up her song on the playlist and Lindy was sitting on an armchair away from the group, watching. Yelena tried to ignore the other woman as much as she could. 

“Lena, come!” her dad urged her.

“No, no, no.” she shook her head. “This is your moment, dad!”

“Ok, but this one’s for you, Lena!” he blew her a kiss, she laughed.

“Yeah, for you, Lena! Even though you’re avoiding me!” Bob with a smile, pointing two V-sign fingers at himself and then at her, just as the two of them began screaming through the chorus.

She felt herself blush at his comment, despite there being no bite behind Bob’s words. She felt herself blush even more as their eyes met during the “it’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you” part. Ugh, this was getting embarrassing for her. Walker leaned over.

“For you, Lena.” he said in his best Bob impression, which sucked. She elbowed him.

“Fuck off, mister ‘tonight we drink, sing and relax’.” she said in her best Ava impression – which was great, by the way – and made kissing noises.

“Ok, ok, cut that out.” It was his turn to elbow her.

“What’s going on between you two, anyway?” She asked.

“Ah, don’t give me that shit, Belova.” Walker replied.

“Yeah, it’s pretty obvious.” she said. “You two suck at hiding it. Disappearing during missions, showing up together for breakfast…”

“Bold coming from you.” he retorted, she raised an eyebrow. 

Before she could say anything, Bob plopped down on top of both of them.

“Sorry, sorry, excuse me.” He said, wiggling himself in between them on the couch. He let out a deep breath. “That was intense.” he said, eyes closed and head thrown back.

“You killed it, Bobby.” Walker told him.

“Awww, thanks, Walker.” Bob smiled, “Hey, are you and Ava–”

“Nope. Sorry to leave so soon, but it’s my turn.” John said suddenly and stood up, joining Ava (and Alexei, who was always hogging the microphone) for a duet.

They laughed at his embarrassment. Yelena would be lying if she said she knew what song they were singing. Her attention turned completely to Bob, who groaned in pain as he held his right shoulder, she noticed her teal hair tie on his wrist.

“You okay?” She asked him.

“Yeah, just sore.” Yelena felt the bile rise in her stomach. The idea of Bob being sore, possibly from being with Lindy was – “Since Lindy moved in, I’ve–”

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” She nodded uncomfortably. “Must be very sore.”

“BOBBY!” Speak of the devil. “You did so well!” Lindy took a seat where Walker had previously been. She leaned on Bob and gave him an awkward side hug. “Wasn’t he just awesome, Yelena?”

“Yeah, he did amazing.” she agreed, “Could’ve mistaken you for a rockstar.”

Bob smiled at her.

“I was in a band when I was like… thirteen through fifteen?” he told her, his face seemed to light up at the memories, “Just me and a couple of friends jamming in their brother's garage. It wasn't much, it–”

“It was pretty shit.” Lindy interrupted him. 

Bob's body tensed next to her, the gleam in his expression fading. Yelena wanted to punch Lindy square across the jaw.

“Remember? Oh, you guys once dedicated a song to me… It was pretty tragic. I'm glad you didn't follow through with that career!” Lindy laughed, but neither Bob nor Yelena joined her.

When Lindy's eyes crossed hers, Yelena could see the cogs in her head turning. 

“Come on, Bobby! I was joking! It was adorable...” Lindy added, but her eyes were still on Yelena. The woman scooted closer to him and then kissed Bob on the cheek, which made him furrow his brow and look at her. “You are adorable.”

Yelena felt like she was going to explode. She wanted to steal Ava's powers and just phase out of existene. She could feel something snaking inside her, gnawing at her insides and making her whole body tremble.

“Cute.” Yelena said before she could even process. Bob turned to her, as did Lindy, “You deserve to be happy.” She gave Bob a small smile. Push it all deep down. She's normal. He's too good for you. “Both of you.” Something crossed Bob’s expression, something Yelena couldn’t quite put her finger on.

“Aw, thanks, Yelena!” Lindy said, nearly sitting on Bob’s lap. He stood up without giving them a second glance. “Don’t you sing?” Lindy asked her.

Yelena shook her head.

“Too bad. I was hoping we could sing together.” Lindy continued, though Yelena could feel the disingenuousness in her voice. She scooted over to get closer to Yelena. “I know we got off on the wrong foot–”

Lindy kept on talking, but Yelena's attention shifted back to the front of the room, where Bob had now joined John, Ava and her dad. He grabbed the microphone from her dad and walked over to the computer, changing the song. John and Ava complained, her father yelled something along the lines of ‘I love this song’ and, next to her, Bucky groaned.

“I wasn't jealous before we met

Now every man that I see is a potential threat

And I'm possessive, it isn't nice

You've heard me saying that smoking was my only vice”

Bob sang, but the drunken antics from his previous performances were gone. He stood there like a statue, holding the microphone to his mouth like his life depended on it. His voice was deep and his eyes fixed to the lyrics playing on the screen.

As he sang the chorus, the others joined enthusiastically. Lindy let out a little yelp and started standing up to join Bob. 

Before she could though, Yelena felt herself being dragged from the couch and to the front of the room, a microphone hastily placed on her hand. Ava and John then sat next to Lindy, basically trapping her on the couch. John winked at her. Asshole. Next to her, Bob looked… adorable, obviously.

It was now her turn. A deer in headlights.

“It was like shooting a sitting duck

A little small talk, a smile, and baby, I was stuck

I still don't know what you've done with me

A grown-up woman should never fall so easily”

She couldn't look at Bob, also standing still as a statue next to him, eyes glued to the TV. Yelena didn’t have to look at the lyrics, she fucking loved Abba. Mamma mia was one of her favorite movies of all time. But these lyrics hit a bit too close to home to risk looking over at Bob and see him looking doe-eyed at Lindy.

“But now it isn't true

Now everything is new

And all I've learned

Has overturned 

I beg of you…”

They sang in unison. Yelena's eyes darted over to her left and she noticed Bob was looking at her too. 

“Don't go wasting your emotion

Lay all your love on me”

Yelena felt like she was going to faint. The room was silent except for the two of them, singing onstage and looking at each other. Her body began swaying, and Bob seemed to relax a bit as he watched her.

“I've had a few little love affairs

They didn't last very long and they've been pretty scarce”

She sang, somewhat a confession. She and Bob were now facing each other. She noticed he was holding onto the microphone with one hand and playing with her hair tie with the other

“'Cause everything is new

And everything is you

And all I've learned

Has overturned

What can I do?” 

Their voices sounded beautiful together, she noticed. She loved singing, but she had never sung for real in front of anyone else. Singing was sacred, her own little therapy. With Bob, though, it felt… right.

“Don't go wasting your emotion

Lay all your love on me” 

Bob had dropped his microphone and taken her hand in his, lifting their hands and twirling her around. She laughed, it felt so silly and so like Bob at the same time. She dropped her microphone too.

“Don't go sharing your devotion

Lay all your love on me”

It was her turn to swirl him, which led to much laughter at a man his size trying to spin under Yelena's arm. She could hear the others singing behind them, as the two of them laughed. Bob got on his knees.

“That's a bit much,” she laughed, “I'm not that short, come here.” She got his other hand and helped him up, when he was standing, she placed her hands on his shoulders and pushed downwards. Bob bent his knees as she did it, until they were face to face, mere inches apart.

“Don't go wasting your emotion

Lay all your love on me”

The others sang loudly in the background. Yelena was taken aback by the intimacy, standing so close to Bob. His eyes were blown wide, the blue irises getting swallowed by the sea of darkness in his pupils. Yelena took a deep breath.

Her whole body felt tingly, like there were ants crawling all over her. She dropped her hands and reached for one of Bob's, lifting their hands together and spinning him around. 

“Don't go sharing your devotion

Lay all your love on me”

He sang as he spun, looking at Yelena through the final line.

The song came to an end, the room was quiet, just the murmur of the others behind them. White noise.

Their fingers were still intertwined and Bob still had his knees bent to face her. Yelena swore she could see a glimpse of gold in his eyes.

“There.” She said, using all her brain power to get the words out without looking down at Bob's lips. “That's how you do it.”

Bob laughed and nodded at her.

She wanted to be brave, to tell him to forget about Lindy, to go back with her to her room, where they could kiss and cuddle and watch shitty TV and do whatever they wanted. She wanted to put her lips on his, not caring that everyone else was watching them – including her dad! She wanted to do so much. 

“Bobby…” Lindy's voice sounded from their right.

Bob blinked a couple of times, he seemed to focus on what was going on around him. He looked at Lindy. Yelena looked down. Just because she wanted so much, didn't mean she deserved to have anything. She removed her hand from Bob's and took a deep breath. She didn't pay attention to what Lindy was saying, only that she stood close to Bob, her hand on his bicep. 

“Alright, I'm done for today,” she said. There were protests, questions, and pleas for her to stay. She paid them no mind, “Night night, losers.”

She walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. She walked to the elevator and, as she did, felt something burning in her throat and behind her eyes. She tried to breathe, but it only made the pain worse. She tried to hold them back, but tears began streaming down her face. She tried to blink them back, but to no avail. She felt so stupid and just… so useless.

“Lena?” her father's voice was soft behind her. She wiped her tears with the sleeves of her sweater. “Lena, look at me.” she shook her head, but he walked up to her.  “What's wrong, solnyshko?”

Yelena didn't answer, she just walked forward and lay her head on her dad's chest, wrapping her arms around him. He quickly retributed, shushing her as he cried and holding her. 

“How about I make you pancakes?” he asked, “They always used to cheer you up when you were little kid.”

Yelena nodded

“With strawberries?” she asked him, Alexei nodded. “Pancakes sound great, dad.” 

“Then let's go, solnyshko.” Alexei pushed the elevator button once again, the doors opened and he guided Yelena inside. She kept her eyes closed and just let the tears fall silently as her dad held her.