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Chapter Text

November before the Euros

“Wieke?” Aggie asked carefully, having subtly slipped out of the room to follow her.

Wieke jumped, she twisted around slightly, letting Aggie approach.

“Are you alright?” Aggie asked when Wieke didn’t say anything as she approached.

Wieke nodded.

“It’s ok if you’re not. I…I noticed you’ve been a bit more reserved. Is…can I do anything?”

Wieke looked up at her then, eyes full of unshed tears. Aggie hesitated, searching her face for some sort of information that she was missing. She stepped forward, tugging Wieke into a loose hug and Wieke shuddered a breath.

“It’s alright. Feel whatever you need to feel.” Aggie told her softly, holding her.

“Sorry.” Wieke squeaked, tensing.

“Don’t be. Here, come with me.” Aggie tucked an arm around her and led her through the maze of hallways.

Aggie shouldered open a door, revealing a storage closet of old couches, beanbags, comfy chairs. Aggie tugged her down onto a plush couch with mismatched cushions.

“This isn’t where you bring your…girlfriends, is it?” Wieke asked warily.

Aggie snorted, “Definitely not girlfriends, the word you’re looking for is hookups. And uh, yeah, some…I didn’t know where else would be private for you to cry if you need.”

Wieke wrinkled her nose, pushing to her feet without touching the couch more than she already had. She glanced around the room, finally pointing at a beanbag questioningly.

Aggie cocked her head.

“What in here have you not had sex on?” Wieke asked bluntly then.

Aggie snorted, “I mean, yeah, but I don’t know if anyone else has had sex in here, ya know?”

Wieke grumbled something in Dutch. Aggie shrugged out of her jacket, spreading it on a couch further in the room she knew she hadn’t used for any amorous reasons.

“Come on, come here.” Aggie coaxed.

Wieke sat down, shuffling back into the corner of the couch.

“So, what’s up?” Aggie asked now that Wieke was tucked in comfortably.

“I don’t know. I just…I feel heavy.” Wieke admitted.

“Heavy?”

Wieke nodded, “Like, I don’t have a reason to be sad, but I am not happy. I have reasons to be happy.”

“Have you felt this before or is it new?”

Wieke shook her head, “I’ve felt it before. I know I just have to wait to feel better, keep doing things that should make me happy.”

“Ok. Is there anything I can do to support you?”

Wieke cocked her head thinking, “You did not bring me here for those reasons, did you?”

Aggie’s jaw dropped, “No! I…I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I mean, not that you’re not gorgeous, you are, but you deserve good.”

“You think you are not good?” Wieke asked, seemingly concerned that she’d misunderstood.

Aggie waved her hand away, “Wieke, can I do anything to support you?”

Wieke shrugged, “I just have to get through it.”

“Ok, well, if you ever need a buddy to get through it with, just let me know.”

Wieke twitched a smile at her, a dim, shy smile, but the first real one Aggie had seen from her in a few days.

Chapter Text

December before the Euros

“Has anyone seen Wieke?” Millie asked the group of younger players lounging around.

“No, what’s up?” Hannah Hampton asked from where she had her legs across Sjoeke’s lap.

Millie shook her head, looking around again for Wieke.

Aggie followed her gaze before grabbing her phone and sending off a text to Wieke to check in. Ten minutes later she had no reply, so Aggie stood, walking off in the direction of the changing room and training fields. She assumed Millie had checked their first, but she wanted to be sure. It took 15 minutes and a trip to the carpark confirming that Wieke’s car was still there for Aggie to start really worrying. As a last-ditch effort, she went to the storage room, flipping on the light as she swung the door open. She caught the end of a shoe out of the corner of her eye and released a shaky breath. Wieke was asleep, she had spread her jacket out under her, and her hands were tucked up in her hoodie, her hair still wet from the showers even though most of the team had gotten out of the showers over an hour ago.

“Wieke?” Aggie asked softly as she climbed through the mess to get to Wieke.

Aggie reached out, brushing a soaked strand of hair out of Wieke’s face. She scrunched her face, pulling away from the contact.

“Wieke, hey, what’s wrong? Do you feel sick?” Aggie asked.

Wieke looked at her bleary eyed and then nodded.

“Yeah? Ok. Ok, can I take you home then and get you something to eat?”

“Just leave me here.” Wieke groaned.

“I’m sorry honey I can’t do that. You’re burning up. Come on, I’ll help you.”

Wieke grumbled and groaned and swayed as Aggie half carried her back to the lounge room where their teammates were hanging out still.

“Wieke!” Millie yelped launching to her feet.

“She doesn’t feel good. I’m going to take her home. Can one of you help me get our stuff to my car?” Aggie asked.

Hannah and Sjo went sprinting to the changing room to grab their things while Aggie led Wieke to the car. She turned, trying to pull out of her embrace in the direction of her own car.

“No, you can’t drive like this. Come on.” Aggie told her gently.

Wieke fell asleep against the car door practically the moment Aggie settled her in and shut the door. Millie looked on worriedly, Lucy, Hannah, and Sjo hot on her heels in concern.

“Where did you find her?” Millie asked.

Aggie hesitated, she knew if she told them that Millie would think she had taken the younger woman there for other things and she didn’t want the rumor mill going.

“She’d just gotten out of the shower and gone to lay down. She was asleep when I found her, her hair is still dripping wet, so she hadn’t been out long. I wonder if she sat down in the shower when you were looking for her and just hadn’t called out or anything. I…how do I help her?” Aggie asked looking at the gathering of women around her.

Lucy twitched a smile whereas everyone else looked suspicious.

“I’ll follow you home kiddo and help you get her settled.” Lucy offered.

Hannah and Sjoeke looked surprised, “What? Keira was sick a lot the first year we were together. I got really good at taking care of her when she couldn’t really communicate. I can help.”

Aggie didn’t even bother masking her surprise, she did not have Lucy talking about dating Kiera on her bingo board for the day, or ever really. She knew that Lucy and Keira both adored the young midfielder though. Keira had tucked her right under her wing and was teaching her everything she knew. She’d said she wanted Wieke to be better than her.

“Thanks.” Aggie managed, “I’m taking her to mine.”

Lucy held the door to Aggie’s building open for her to drag Wieke through and to the elevator.

“Aggie.” Lucy called carefully.

“Yeah?” Aggie grunted, readjusting the lifesize ragdoll further into her side.

“Lift is out.”

“You’re fucking with me.” Aggie said straightening only to immediately catch Wieke as she swayed, her eyes fluttering.

Lucy grimaced, “Give me her, I can carry her.”

Aggie shook her head, “I got her.” And she securely scooped Wieke into her arms.

She carried Wieke into her apartment, up three flights of stairs since the lift decided that it didn’t need to function when she needed it to the most, and through to her guest bedroom where Lucy helped wrestle her shoes and hoodie off. Weike shivered, frowning uncomfortably.

“Hey, I’m going to get you a drink and some medicine, alright? I’ll be right back. Lucy will sit here with you.” Aggie told her gently, leaning down to speak softly to her.

Wieke looked at her, not comprehending. Lucy took her temperature and balked at the number.

“Hey kiddo, can you tell me if you started feeling bad at training or before?” Lucy asked stroking her hair.

“In the shower. I felt a little weak during training, but it hit all at once.” Wieke managed.

“You’ve got a pretty high fever, so I’d really like you to drink what Aggie brings back ok?”

Lucy stood, directing Aggie into the chair so she could slip out of the room to call the medical staff. They expressed concern and gave her a list of things to pay attention to that would warrant an increased level of care needed. Lucy rooted around Aggie’s kitchen, putting together a thin broth.

“How’s she doing?” Lucy asked.

“She’s not cooperating with the drinking.” Aggie sighed.

“Not thirsty, just tired.” Wieke grumbled.

Lucy hummed, she found a straw in the back of drawer and popped it into the glass before tucking it between the younger woman’s lips.

“Drink.” Lucy instructed.

Wieke managed a half-hearted glare as she did.

“I know you want to sleep, but I can’t let you just yet, ok? I need you to drink another glass of this and have some broth for me and then you can sleep.” Lucy explained.

Wieke groaned, grumbling in Dutch. Lucy frowned, unsure what she said. She stepped out to refill the glass while Aggie supervised the broth.

“I’m freezing. Where’s my hoodie?” Wieke asked looking around.

“You’ve got a fever; you need to cool down.”

Wieke shivered, a thin sheen of sweat on her forehead and neck.

“Stay?” Wieke asked as Aggie stood a few minutes later after coaxing the last few sips of broth into her.

“Ok. I’m going to go change and then I’ll be back, alright?”

Wieke nodded once, curling into a ball and falling immediately asleep.

“I don’t like how poorly she clearly feels.” Lucy said immediately upon shutting the door.

“No, me either.” Aggie agreed.

“Viv would kill us both if we let something happen to her.” Lucy suddenly realized.

She thumbed through her contacts and made the call, hoping Viv was home and not in Manchester. There was a number of Dutch and English curse words, the sound of keys, and a slamming door as Lucy explained what was happening. Viv stood at Aggie’s front door twenty minutes later frowning deeply, Beth and an armful of supplies in tow.

“Where is she?” Viv asked gruffly.

Aggie swallowed, leading Viv through her apartment to Wieke. She’d spent a decade in awe of the Dutch striker following her through her apartment. She watched her play, tried to mimic her play after her, and now Viv was here, but she barely seemed to see her. Aggie understood, but she was thrown off by the coolness until she saw how she was with Wieke.

“Sweetheart what happened?” Viv asked, rubbing her arm to wake her.

“I don’t know. I felt weak at training and then really bad in the shower. I sat down for a while and now I have a fever.”

Viv hummed, “How much have you had to eat and drink today?”

Wieke answered with Aggie supplying a bit of information on the past hour.

“Ok sweetheart.” Viv said softly, “Do you want me to call your mom?”

Wieke shook her head no.

“It seems like Aggie and Lucy are taking good care of you. Do you want to stay here, or do you want to come to mine and Beth’s?”

“No more car.” Wieke grumbled, shifting uncomfortably.

“What is it sweetheart?” Viv asked, catching the discomfort.

“Feel sick.” Wieke answered her face going a pale hue of green.

Aggie launched over the bed to grab the trashcan from the hall bathroom and get back in time.

“No. No. Just, help me to the bathroom.” Wieke pleaded grimacing.

“Ok.” Aggie shoved the bin into Viv’s arms, threw the rest of Wieke’s covers off, and scooped the woman into her arms carefully.

Wieke barely made it before dry heaving twice and crying as she threw up.

“I know honey. I know, it’s alright.” Aggie murmured, rubbing her back with one hand as she dug out a cloth to dampen and offer her.

Lucy, Viv, and Beth crowded around them. Beth crouched down with a glass of water.

“Here sweetheart, rinse your mouth out when you can.” Beth offered gently.

“Thank you.” Wieke cried while taking the glass weakly.

The glass barely touched her lips before Wieke yanked it away to be sick again, sloshing water all over herself, crying harder.

“Aggie?” Lucy asked gently.

Aggie looked up, eyes wide and wild with panic and fear.

“Could you get her a change of clothes? And maybe a blanket or towel you don’t particularly care about?”

Aggie swallowed, she didn’t want to leave Wieke, but she was the only one who knew where to find all of those things.

“I’ve got her.” Viv added, seeing the clear warring thoughts.

Viv stepped further into the room, kneeling down into the floor before settling more comfortably against the tub and rubbing Wieke’s back softly.

“I’ll be right back.” Aggie murmured softly.

Wieke cried, heaving nothing but water and bile. Aggie hurtled through the apartment snatching a blanket and towel blindly from the closet and before upturning her dresser to find soft shorts and a shirt. Viv was speaking softly in Dutch, soothing her, when she whirled back into the room.

“I think this wave is over at least if we want to try to replenish some hydration.” Lucy said from the doorway after a few minutes of quiet crying, soft Dutch, and no puke.

Carefully, Viv and Aggie helped Wieke to her feet, only for her to immediately stumble and Aggie scooped her right up and sat her on the bathroom counter, not having any of that risk. Viv helped her out of her sweat, water, and puke, soaked clothes, gave her a damp cloth and a baby wipe to quickly clean up with, and helped her into Aggie’s soft pajamas. Wieke sighed into the collar of the hoodie they allowed her to put on if she didn’t use a heavy blanket. Aggie turned the fan on in the bedroom.

“Her fever is down a degree.” Viv announced after scrubbing her hands up to her elbows.

Aggie dimly realized she was likely next in line to throw up with how close she’d been to Wieke and how little regard she’d had for her own risk of sickness the last several hours. She winced internally and slipped away to get her own electrolyte drink and water to pre-puke-hydrate. She found Lucy chugging a water in the kitchen seemingly having realized her similar fate.

“You alright?” Lucy asked lightly.

Aggie nodded, “I don’t like seeing anyone sick, but I’m glad I didn’t let her convince me to just take her home like she wanted.”

Lucy nodded. They could hear Beth and Viv moving around upstairs still, leaving the two of them awkwardly in the kitchen. Aggie handed over an electrolyte packet for Lucy to mix into her own glass.

“What are the odds we’re infected?”

“You more than me, but very high unfortunately.” Lucy sighed.

Aggie winced, “I hate how sick she feels on top of everything.”

“Everything? What else is wrong?” Lucy asked.

“Oh, nothing.” Aggie lied lamely.

Lucy cocked her head, “Better question, how do you know something else is wrong?”

Aggie drank her water, willing herself to remain quiet.

“Has our Chelsea “It Girl, playboy” found herself someone she’s a bit soft on?” Lucy asked teasing.

Aggie squirmed, shrugging tightly, “It doesn't matter.”

Lucy hummed, “We’ll talk about that when you’re more ready to, alright?”

“No.” Aggie said simply.

Lucy snorted, tugging the young forward into a hug, before patting her arm gently, “Will you and Wieke be alright or do you want someone to stay with you?”

“We’ll be alright. Can you let Sonia know what happened and that we won’t be at training?”

“Absolutely. I’ll come check on you tomorrow, or if I’ve fallen ill, I’ll ask Kei to swing by when she gets Narla from me.”

“Good luck.” Aggie told her grimly.

“Yeah, you too. I’m going to check on her one more time and say bye to the Meadema’s and then I’m going home.”

Aggie heated up a bit more broth and put some of the electrolyte drinks into freezer molds for later before traipsing up the stairs to where Viv and Beth were sitting with Wieke. Viv was texting someone, frowning.

“Netherlands medical staff said if her fever keeps going up or if she hasn’t been able to keep anything down by the morning then we should take her to hospital.” Beth explained when Viv ignored Aggie joining them.

Lucy hummed, “Chelsea staff said the same thing. I’ve explained it all to Aggie. They’ll be fine.”

Viv frowned, taking in the young midfielder curled in pain. Wieke’s cheeks were flushed, a thin sheen of sweat on her forehead. Lucy’s heart ached. She was nearly 15 years older than Aggie and Wieke, and she adored the younger women on the team, and tried to tuck them under her wing protectively.

“I’d really rather take her home with us.” Viv grumbled.

“I know, but Aggie will take good care of her.” Lucy said gently.

Viv eyed her suspiciously, “I don’t know.”

Aggie felt her stomach drop as Viv surveyed her. She’d faced Viv as an opposing striker, but this look was worse than being picked apart on the field.

Lucy folded a knee under herself on the bed, pushing back the damp strands of hair stuck to Wieke’s forehead. The younger woman’s eyes fluttered open.

“Hey kiddo. I’m about to go home. Viv and Beth are still here. Viv wants you to go home with her and Beth. Do you want to go with them or stay here with Aggie?”

“Stay here with Aggie. I don’t want to get in the car again.” She grumbled.

“Ok darlin. Can you drink some more water for me before we go? I bet Aggie will bring you some broth or something if you think you can stomach it.” Lucy coaxed gently.

Wieke took tiny sips until Lucy was satisfied. Lucy leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead gently before setting the glass down and heading out into the evening.

“How do you feel?” Beth asked as Wieke settled uncomfortably against the pillows after a wobbly trip to the bathroom with an overprotective Viv.

“Bad.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know. I felt a bit weak at training and then in the shower I really started feeling bad. I turned the temperature down and sat down on the bench hoping it would pass. The cooler water helped but I still felt bad, so I went to take a nap before driving home. Aggie found me and brought me here and then I threw up on everyone.”

Beth and Viv nodded.

“Hey, you’re awake. How’re you feeling?” Aggie asked slipping into the room with a fresh glass of water and bowl of broth.

“Pretty bad.”

Aggie nodded, folding herself onto the same spot Lucy had occupied a few minutes prior. Wieke closed her eyes, wincing.

“I brought you a kitchen towel I put in the freezer I thought might feel good if you’re too warm now.” Aggie told her gently.

Wieke took it, wiping at her face with the cold towel. She silently accepted the glass of cool water, taking small sips. Aggie rested a hand cautiously on her knee, just supportive.

Beth nudged Viv to her feet.

“You’ll call if you feel any worse, alright? Or Aggie, you will?” Beth asked gently.

“Of course. Don’t worry too much, thank you for coming over to check on her and bringing us some supplies.”

Aggie walked them to the door, locking it behind them before making her way back upstairs.

“You need anything different?” Aggie asked taking the seat Viv had been occupying.

“No, I’m alright. Well, not really, but I will be.”

Aggie hummed, “Might just be a 24 hour bug and you’ll be fine in the morning.”

“I hope so. I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. I could sleep for days.”

Aggie laughed, “I’ll take that as my cue then. If you need anything I’m upstairs, but I turned my phone sound on so you can call me, and I’ll hear it.”

“Thank you.” Wieke called softly after her.

The next morning, Wieke felt weak, and a little dizzy, but otherwise alright. She tried to sip from the glass that Aggie must have refreshed at some point but ended up chugging it because she was so thirsty. She pushed out of bed carefully and padded to the bathroom. She made a face at herself in the mirror at how bad she looked. She was pale and had dark circles under her eyes. She carefully made her way downstairs on wobbly legs.

“Morning.” Wieke called softly, hoping Aggie would hear her.

Aggie popped up in front of her a moment later, eyes flitting across her face for any signs of an urgent need.

“Are you feeling better?” Aggie asked.

Wieke nodded, “Still weak, but really thirsty. And I’m starving.”

Aggie laughed, “Let’s fix that then.”

An hour later, Aggie coaxed Wieke back into bed for a long nap, which left Wieke feeling actually alright other than some lingering fatigue. She woke and went looking for Aggie to offer ordering dinner and found her hugging her toilet like a lifeline.

“Oh!” Wieke yelped, dropping to her knees to pull her hair out of the way even though she’d already gotten sick in it.

“I’ve got you. You’re alright.” Wieke told her softly, rubbing her back as she heaved and cried.

Wieke dug through her cabinets, finding a cloth for her to wipe her mouth on before rifling through her closet to find pajamas for both of them. She coaxed a glass of water into her only for it to immediately make a reappearance. Aggie pushed the next glass away, leaning her head on the side of the tub.

“I need to wash my hair.” Aggie said weakly.

“Alright. If you lean your head back I can wash it for you. I think if you try to stand you’ll be dizzy and feel worse.” Wieke explained clamoring into the tub and pulling the shower head down to wash her hair.

“Thank you.” Aggie whispered.

“You would have done the same thing for me yesterday.”

Aggie smiled weakly.

Wieke settled her into her own bed and set her up with everything she could need.

“Stay?” Aggie asked, “Just for a few?”

“Alright.”

The two ended up falling asleep. Wieke curled on her side, Aggie propped against pillows with a bucket next to her for emergencies.

Aggie blinked awake around 4am, dizzy and sore, and in desperate need of water. She clumsily half drank half spilled the glass of water on her nightstand and fell right back asleep.

When Aggie woke up for real, she found she had her arm tossed over Wieke’s waist, her head tucked in her side, Wieke was staring at the ceiling.

“Hey.” Aggie mumbled.

“Feeling better?”

“Much. Still tired though.”

Wieke nodded against her pillow.

“You ok?” Aggie asked.

“Yeah.”

“Penny for your thoughts?”

Wieke frowned confused, “What?”

“Sorry, it’s an American saying, what are you thinking about?”

“I…I was just thinking about how many other women have slept right here.” She admitted.

“Just you.” Aggie admitted quietly.

Wieke frowned, glancing over at her clearly not believing her, “I uh, if I bring them home, I don’t bring them upstairs. There’s a guest room downstairs.”

“But you don’t bring them to your room?”

“No. I mean, they don’t stay the night, and they don’t come back. I don’t let anyone sleep in my bed with me. If they fall asleep before I can get them out of my flat, I get up and go to bed and leave them a note and a water bottle and granola bar for the morning and hope they’re gone before I have to wake them up and ask them to leave.”

Wieke stared at her as if that was one of the most insane things she’d ever heard.

“Thanks for staying.” Aggie added quietly, still curled into her.

Wieke turned her gaze back to the ceiling with a soft sigh. She patted the arm Aggie had tossed over her waist.

“Come on, let’s get up. We both need to eat, and you need to rehydrate.”

Once Wieke was satisfied that Aggie was on the mend and they had both eaten, she made her way to the door to put on her shoes.

“Wh…where…are you leaving?” Aggie asked, deflating, she had turned the corner to ask which movie marathon Wieke wanted to do with her while they recovered on the couch.

“Yeah, I should go back home, Viv and Beth have my dog, and I know they love her, but I should still go get her and go home.” Wieke explained without looking up.

Aggie’s shoulders sagged further, “Oh. Ok. Um, well, text me when you’re home then?”

“Alright. I hope you get a good nap today. I feel normal today.”

“Yeah, me too, thanks for taking care of me.”

“I mean, I gave it to you, it’s the least I could do.” Wieke laughed as she opened the front door.

Chapter Text

Euros

          Aggie sank into her seat on the bus after the game against France with a pit in her stomach. She hadn’t gotten to go into the game at all. The forwards couldn’t get around the French defenders. She swallowed hard, a hint of panic at the taste of bile in the back of her throat. She closed her eyes, pressing her body fully back into the seat. Her phone buzzed in the pocket of her track pants. She didn’t really want to see what her mom had to say, and she knew Wieke was likely on lockdown at the Netherlands camp. Her stomach twisted more knowing that they had to play each other this week as well. 

Aggie ignored her phone throughout the Netherlands game. She put it on in her room, curled up around a pillow, threw herself a bit of a pity party. She managed to twitch a smile when Wieke got into the game, she was doing so well, and Aggie was proud of her. She pulled her phone out at the end of the game to text her before falling asleep.

It hadn’t been the same between them since they’d both had that 24 hour bug. Aggie felt scrambled up. She caught Wieke looking at her sometimes, just a bit differently, like she was a puzzle she couldn’t figure out. At first Aggie thought it was stress, then she wondered if she’d done something wrong.

She decided to ask her about it one night when the team was all out together a few weeks prior. She grabbed a second glass of the cocktail Wieke was almost out of and zeroed in on the direct path to the balcony she’d just excused herself to for a break from the evening.

“Bit loud in there isn’t it?” Aggie asked, pulling the door shut behind her.

Wieke startled just a bit before relaxing back against the railing she’d been leaning on, “Yeah, thought no one would notice if I slipped out for a few.”

Aggie smiled, leaning next to her, “I wasn’t sure if you wanted another drink, but I grabbed you one in case.”

“Thanks.” Wieke said softly, taking the glass with a smile.

“You alright?” Aggie asked after a few minutes of dull noise coming through the door but quiet between them.

“Yeah.”

“You sure? You…I don’t know. You seem different, more reserved around me. Did I do something?” Aggie asked, fiddling with one of her rings.

“No. We’re alright Aggie.” Wieke told her, her smile was not reaching her eyes.

Wieke turned back to the rail for a few moments, “You’ve had suitors all night Aggie, you can go back to them. I’m alright.”

“Oh. Ok.” Aggie managed, suddenly wanting to be nowhere less than back in there with all of that attention, but she did go.

Later that night, Aggie spotted Wieke out of the corner of her eye as she and the woman who she’d spent most of the night flirting with made their way hastily out the door. The look on Wieke’s face still haunted her, but she didn’t know what it meant.

Aggie tossed and turned that night unable to stop that memory replaying again and again. She couldn’t get comfortable enough to sleep. She was exhausted for recovery the next day. She dreaded the Netherlands game.

Chapter Text

Netherlands v England

Aggie was nearly sick with the idea of playing Wieke that night. They’d texted a bit, but the conversation was stilted. Aggie decided to blow off some steam after she couldn’t sleep after France match and ended up finding an attractive Swiss woman in a pub. She did the same the next two nights before playing the Netherlands. None of those women made her feel better.

Wieke smiled at her during the pre-match pitch inspection and Aggie breathed a sigh of relief as she tugged the shorter woman into her arms. Wieke was soft, and she rubbed her hand up her shoulders gently.

“You did great in the Wales game.” Aggie said quietly.

Wieke giggled nervously, “Thank you. I’m sure you’ll come in to play us.”

“I’d much rather play with you then play you.” Aggie admitted quietly.

“We’ll be fine. See you out there.” Wieke told her quietly.

England beat the Netherlands and Aggie tucked a teary eyed Wieke into her arms protectively in the tunnel, whispering softly to her. Wieke had been on the wrong end of a couple rough tackles, and she’d watched from the bench, her heart clenching for her friend, even as she celebrated each England goal.

“You should be celebrating with your team.” Wieke said weakly.

“I’m right where I want to be.” Aggie murmured rubbing her shoulders, “Do you want me to get you some ice or a wrap for anything?”

“I’ll get some ice at the hotel before laying down.”

It was too late of a game for Aggie to find her way into someone else’s bed and she found herself lonely. Really, she found herself missing Wieke. She wanted her friend. She didn’t even want to find another bed to fall into, she just wanted Wieke.

The next night Lucy was leaning against her door when she got back a bit late from her adventures. Aggie felt her shoulders sag even further. She’d been doing her best, but clearly Lucy could see through her.

“Enjoying Switzerland?” Lucy asked lightly.

“Yeah. You?”

Lucy shrugged, “It’s alright. Tournaments are always exciting and stressful. How is Wieke?”

“I don’t know. She was upset yesterday. She got some ice and hopefully some good sleep and recovery today.” Aggie replied.

Lucy frowned, “You weren’t just with her?”

“No. Why would I be?”

“I thought…nevermind.”

Aggie threw her a confused glance but didn’t push.

“So, what were you up to then?”

“Just having some fun.” Aggie replied.

Lucy looked her up and down, she didn’t look like she’d been having fun, frankly she looked kind of miserable.

“As long as you’re being safe.”

Aggie rolled her eyes, “Yes, Mum.”

Lucy ruffled her hair, “Night kiddo, get some sleep.”

Lucy paused, then pulled the younger woman into her arms. Aggie clung to her a bit tighter than she expected.

“You sure you’re ok?” Lucy asked gently.

Aggie nodded into her shoulder before pulling back. She couldn’t meet Lucy’s eyes.

Chapter Text

Netherlands v France

Aggie snuck into the Netherlands hotel after she overheard Beth telling Leah they’d made it back. She’d waited twenty minutes after Beth left for Viv to search for Wieke. She found the midfielder on the roof of the Netherlands hotel. Aggie didn’t say anything, she just wrapped an arm around her waist softly. Wieke yelped and jerked away before realizing it was Aggie and tucked herself into her side, clinging to her waist as she started to cry in earnest. Aggie stayed silent, she didn’t know what to say. England were going to the Quarter-finals while the Netherlands went home.

“I wanted to get out of the group.” Wieke hiccupped.

“I wanted you to get out of the group too. I wanted to play you in the final.”

Aggie rubbed her back for a long time; she didn’t have any words for her that would help.

“Will you stay with me tonight? I don’t want to be alone.”

“Of course I will.” Aggie replied instantly.

Aggie changed into a soft pair of Wieke’s pajamas while Wieke showered. She crawled into bed, taking the side with the empty nightstand. She was nervous, she and Wieke had shared a room a few times at Chelsea away games, and once when they were both sick, but this was different.

Wieke looked downtrodden and exhausted as she crawled into bed. Aggie reached out hesitantly, rubbing her shoulder.

“Is there anything I can do to make you feel even a tiny bit better?" Aggie asked.

Wieke shook her head but seemed to swallow most of a sob. Aggie scooted closer, tugging Wieke into her side.

“I’m so sorry.” Aggie whispered as she stroked up and down her back, careful of her hand placement.

Aggie’s heart squeezed painfully as Wieke curled tighter into her. Aggie stayed awake long after Wieke’s sobs evened into deep breathing. Aggie pressed a soft kiss to Wieke’s hair before allowing herself to follow her into sleep. It was the first night Aggie slept fitfully the whole tournament, her own anxieties quelled by the steady breathing mixing with hers.

“I’ll come back when you make it to the final.” Wieke told her quietly the next morning as Aggie got redressed.

Aggie hugged her tighter, unsure of what to say.

The rest of the tournament Aggie got plenty of attention from other players, finding herself more than occupied by a few of them. But it was Wieke’s arms at the end of the final when the friends and family were let onto the field that she wanted. Wieke scooped her up and twirled her around, screaming in her ear.

The attention Aggie received when they got back to Chelsea was nearly overwhelming. She had her clear pick of women throwing themselves at her.

The team went out for her birthday a few months after the win, Keira tucked protectively into Lucy’s side with a mocktail, the two back together and better than ever despite the cast encasing Keira’s healing leg. Wieke spent most of that night tucked into Keira’s other side. The older midfielder adored Wieke, and Wieke had been Lucy’s right hand for the last few months helping take care of Keira.

She’d gotten up once to talk to Aggie when Aggie had been leaning against the table, taking a break from dancing the night away. Wieke had awkwardly asked if she wanted to get some air with her, and Aggie went happily.

Wieke gave her a small, wrapped box and a birthday card. She explained that she’d brought it back from her hometown in the Netherlands. It was a carved wooden figurine of Aggie with the Euro’s trophy. Aggie blinked, sobering.

“It’s gorgeous.” She murmured tracing the intricate lines, already imagining where it would go in her trophy case.

“So are you.” Wieke replied.

Aggie had blushed bright red, flustered and unsure what to do for once, she’d pulled Wieke into a crushing hug.

“Thank you.” She’d kissed Wieke on the cheek as she pulled back.

She held her there, bodies pressed together, faces a few centimeters apart. Wieke’s cheeks were pink, her eyes twinkling, Aggie felt her breath hitch and her heart squeezed. She reached up with a trembling hand and brushed a strand of Wieke’s hair back, brushing her cheek with the pads of her fingers. Wieke’s eyes fluttered closed, her hands tightening their grip on Aggie’s sides. Aggie pushed them both back just a step, her hand protecting Wieke’s head from the brick wall. Wieke’s breathing stuttered. Aggie leaned in, pressing their foreheads together, brushing their noses. She just barely pressed her lips to Wieke’s when the door burst open, a drunk woman who’d been hanging on Aggie all night stumbling over to them, draping herself over Aggie. Wieke was gone in half a second. By the time Aggie was able to get back inside, she was gone fully, Lucy and Keira with her. Her heart plummeted, she went home alone that night, the gift from Wieke on her nightstand instead of in her trophy case.

Chapter Text

World Cup Countdown: 150 days

Lucy let herself into Aggie’s apartment after banging on the door for nearly 10 minutes. Keira had advised her not to get involved, but Lucy was over it, so she barged in using the spare key. Aggie was upstairs in her bed, a random woman downstairs in her guest bed that Lucy graciously kicked out for her.

“What the hell, Lucy?” Aggie demanded sitting up in her bed groggily.

“Look, I don’t know what you’re doing, but you’re going to get hurt.” Lucy explained as she shoved the guest linens into the washing machine, needing to do something with her hands.

“What do you mean?” Aggie bristled.

“You aren’t sleeping enough. You’re exhausted. You’re playing sloppy. You’ve picked up more cards this season than you have ever before. You’re going to get hurt. And you’re going to get dropped from the World Cup roster if you don’t get a handle on yourself. So, I am here to kickstart that.” Lucy explained sternly.

Aggie blinked back surprised tears at what Lucy told her. She swallowed thickly.

“Ok.”

Lucy nodded, “I want you up front at the World Cup. I want you to take care of yourself. I want you to play and not get hurt. I’m not trying to be cruel.”

Aggie nodded, not trusting herself to speak. Lucy leaned forward, tugging Aggie into a hug, before pressing a kiss to her temple.  

Aggie stood in her kitchen an hour later after an everything shower. She frowned. Her apartment was a mess. Lucy started the laundry so she decided she may as well finish it and wash her own sheets while she was at it. She wandered around the apartment tidying up what she’d neglected since that night at the bar with Wieke before collapsing onto the couch.

It was too quiet.

She called Lucy before she could get too in her head about it.

“Good evening Ms. Beever-Jones.” Lucy singsoned as she answered the phone.

“If you’re going to barge into my house, start my laundry for me, and kick out the woman in my guest bed, you could at least invite me to dinner for upending my day.” Aggie groused.

Lucy snorted a laugh, “Hey Kei, we need to make enough for Aggie.”

Aggie couldn’t hear Keira on the other end of the phone, but she did hear Lucy’s warm “Come on over.”

Keira was still in rehab for her leg that was broken after the Euros, but she was off crutches and much more mobile and steadier on her feet with each week.

Keira opened the door with a grin 20 minutes later, “Hey kiddo, come on in. Lucy’s making dinner right now.”

“I thought you were making dinner when I called.” Aggie said toeing out of her shoes.

“I was, Lucy took over. I did a lot of pressups on my legs today in rehab so I’m a bit tired.” Keira shrugged, leading her to the kitchen where she plopped into a chair motioning for Aggie to join her.

“Oh, uh, do you need anything then? Or Lucy do you need help?” Aggie asked, changing her attitude as she remembered how hard of a time Keira was having. She felt the heat in her cheeks at her embarrassment for being snippy with her.

“If you want to stir this so the garlic doesn’t burn while I dump the pasta water off that’d be good, so Kei doesn’t have to get up again.” Lucy instructed as Aggie jumped to action.

Aggie tried not to be nosy as Lucy carried Keira’s plate to the table and pulled her chair out for her. She glanced away but not without catching the kiss Lucy pressed to Keira’s temple or the way Keira smiled softly after her as she returned to the kitchen for the rest of their dinner.

“So what did you get up to today, Aggie?” Keira asked lightly before taking a bite of her salad.

“Well after Lucy started my laundry for me, I decided to keep it going and did a few more loads. I tidied up what I’d been neglecting and then sat down on the couch and called Lucy.”

“You started her laundry for her?” Keira laughed.

Lucy shrugged, “Kicked a random woman out to do it too.”

Keira coughed on the sip she just took.

“Oh?”

Aggie shrugged.

“Who was she?” Keira asked as she recovered.

“Met her last night.” Aggie grumbled.

Keira shrugged, “Nothing wrong with that. Did you get her number for later at least before Lucy kicked her out?”

“I wouldn’t use it anyways.”

“Why not?” Lucy asked.

“Not really interested in any of the women I bring home enough for anything more than a night.”

Lucy hummed, “Been there. Gets a bit lonely after a while.”

Aggie shifted uneasily, glancing between Keira and Lucy. Keira didn’t seem phased, but this was their second time around, so maybe she’d known about the string of hookups before then.  

February: Four Months before the Euros

          With the help of Lucy and Keira, Aggie had spent a lot less time with random women the second half of the season. She felt better. She was playing better. She hadn’t gotten a card since Lucy came barging into her apartment to shake some sense into her. It hadn’t been easy. Lucy had intercepted her getting in her own way an embarrassing number of times.

          There was one major upside to spending the amount of time with Lucy and Keira as she had been: Wieke. The two older players absolutely adored the Dutch midfielder. They had her over for dinner a couple times a week, often getting Aggie to join them with the promise of some time with the Dutch woman.

          The less of an active mess Aggie became the more she realized she was screwed. She’d adored Wieke, just like everyone else. She’d had a crush on her when she first got to Chelsea, but she hadn’t seemed interested in her, or women in general, except for that one night where they barely kissed, and Wieke really hadn’t talked to her much since. Now that she was getting her shit together though, she was screwed.

          Wieke’s adorable laugh and the way she shyly tucked into herself when she was hesitant or embarrassed melted Aggie. She was easy to tease and laughed at the attention she got. Her accent was adorable, and while she was fluent in English, there were still words that tripped her up and Aggie nearly tripped over herself she was so distracted by how adorably flustered Wieke got.

Wieke was unsure of her at first. When Aggie started acting different to Wieke, the midfielder was naturally suspicious of her intentions. They’d been dancing around each other for months. Aggie falling further and further for her, Wieke closing her down, slipping out of her grasp each time.

It was the 82^nd minute of the last group stage match in the Champions league. Snow swirled around the pitch, making it hard to see when the wind gusted. Aggie jumped up, searching for a header off a corner. Pain sparked up Aggie’s ankle as she leapt and she folded like a card, grasping at it.

“Aggie?” Wieke asked, dropping beside her.

Lucy was there too, and Mille. The whistle blast was short and unnecessary, the whole of both teams having frozen when Aggie cried out and fallen. Aggie couldn’t say anything. She pressed her face into the ground, an arm tossed over her head, grasping at the grass.

Aggie barely registered the medics arriving on scene until one of them manipulated her ankle and she cried out. Lucy and Wieke were both kneeling at her head. Lucy stroked her hair, blocking her from view of the crowd.

“Aggie?” Wieke asked again.

Aggie’s ears were ringing, but she blinked up at her, grasping onto her arm tightly, her lips quivered with the force of holding back her sobs.

“They’re bringing the stretcher out.” Lucy said loud enough for Aggie to find her in the sea of pain behind her eyes.

“I can walk.” Aggie gasped.

“I’m not sure you should.” One of the physios told her.

Aggie frowned.

“What happened when you went down?” The physio asked.

Aggie squeezed her eyes shut, breathing deeply as the pain kept radiating, “Um, I tried to jump, and my ankle gave out.”

“What does it feel like now?” She asked.

“Like even breathing hurts my ankle.” Aggie told them.

Lucy kept stroking her hair. Wieke followed the trainer’s gaze to her ankle.

“I’m going to squeeze your calf.” The physio told her.

Aggie whimpered, her eyes squeezed shut as she cried out when her foot twitched.

“That’s good news Aggie.” Lucy said gently.

Aggie felt like she might be sick.

“Your ligament may be torn, but if it was a full rupture your foot wouldn’t have responded to the stimulation of your calf like that.” Lucy explained.

Aggie shook her head, it was too much to take in. Lucy leaned down and kissed her forehead.

“You’re going to be alright sweetheart. We’ll take care of you.” Lucy said in her ear.

Lucy and Wieke let her go, but she cried out.

“Aggie honey, I need to go to the side to get a new plan together with the team. Can Wieke stay with you, or do you need both of us?” Lucy explained, stroking her head again.

“Wieke?” Aggie asked thickly.

“I’m right here.” Wieke answered, taking Lucy’s place awkwardly.

Aggie nodded. Wieke held her hand, stroking the inside of her wrist with her thumb.

“You’re going to be just fine Aggie. I know it hurts, I’m so sorry. Can they put you on the stretcher and get you off the field?” Wieke asked.

“I can walk.” Aggie insisted.

“For me, please don’t?” Wieke asked and Aggie couldn’t say no to her.

Wieke walked her to the touchline, “I’ll come find you in just a few minutes, ok?”

Aggie nodded, pressing her lips together to prevent the sob trying to rip out of her. Wieke squeezed her hand.

“Go win it.” Aggie told her.

And Wieke did. She settled back into the midfield, eyes darting to the tunnel one last time. Eight minutes plus eight minutes of added time later, Chelsea were through through to the next round.

She clapped the crowd, did an interview, and showered before making her way to the physio room to find Aggie.

“How are you feeling?” Wieke asked.

Aggie’s shoulders were rounded, “I need surgery.”

“I’m so sorry.” Wieke said softly, sitting on the physio bed across from her.

“I…I just jumped…and now? Now I might miss the World Cup…I just jumped!” Aggie cried.

Wieke stood, tugging Aggie into her shoulder and rubbing circles onto her back.

Lucy knocked on the door and stepped in then, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Lucy said stepping back out.

“It’s…you’re not, come on in.” Wieke told her stepping away from Aggie.

Lucy came inside fully then, pulling Aggie into a hug.

“They told me you need surgery.” Lucy said quietly.

Aggie nodded.

“It’s not a big one though honey, it’s just a stitch or two to shore up your achilles tendon. There’s a tear there, but it’s small, and the surgery will ensure it holds up and heals before the World Cup as long as rehab goes as it should. You might even play the last few games of the season with us.” Lucy explained.

“That’s good!” Wieke added running a hand up Aggie’s back.

Aggie whimpered into Lucy’s shoulder.

“You’re ok sweetheart.” Lucy said softly, “You’ve got your Mum and family and all of us. We’re all here for you sweetheart. You can come stay with Keira and I if you would rather us instead of your Mum if you want.”

“You’ve got Keira to focus on; I don’t want to get in your way.” Aggie explained.

“Kei will be back playing in two months, she’s already almost back at full training, she’s fine, and she’s already texted me to get the update and told me to bring you home so we can take care of you.” Lucy explained.

“Ok.” Aggie agreed.

“I’m coming with you too.” Wieke added.

Lucy threw a knowing look over to the young midfielder, but Wieke missed it entirely, she was turned, getting crutches together for Aggie.

Wieke settled a hand on Aggie’s back as she carefully crutched out to the bus. She hesitated at the step up onto the bus.

“I’ve got your back.” Wieke murmured, pressing her hand more firmly.

Aggie nodded, taking a hesitant step up. Wieke slid into the seat next to Aggie at the front of the bus. Aggie leaned her head against the cool glass, scrubbing at the tear tracks on her cheeks. It was a quiet ride from the stadium back to the training ground between the two of them.

Wieke hovered protectively as Aggie made her way off the bus and into Keira’s waiting arms.

“Hey sweetheart.” Keira murmured holding her tightly, “How’s your foot feel?”

“It hurts.”

“I’m sorry honey. Come on, I put in an order for dinner to pick up on the way home, and then we’ll tuck you into bed and deal with the rest in the morning alright?”

“You don’t have to take care of me, Kei.” Aggie started.

“Enough of that, I’m doing it anyways honey.” Keira said firmly, “And Wieke will be there too, Luce said she hasn’t left your side.” Keira whispered.

“She doesn’t…it’s not…we…”

“Ok, ok, sweetheart.” Keira soothed.

Keira tucked Aggie into the comfy armchair, elevated her foot up on a pillow, and made her a plate of the takeout, Aggie barely tasted it; she just kept staring at her booted foot. Someone put on a movie that Aggie didn’t pay attention to at all.

Wieke carefully stood, sitting herself onto the edge of the armchair Aggie was in. Aggie rested her head on Wieke’s arm.

“Do you want to watch the movie, or do you want to go to bed? I know the meds they gave you are probably making you feel kind of out of it.”

“Will you stay with me?” Aggie asked.

“Of course, but you do have to shower first.” Wieke told her gently.

Aggie swallowed, “I don’t know how to do that like this.”

“Luce and Kei have a sit in shower they put in for Lucy’s knees, came in handy for Keira, and now for you.” Wieke told her.

Aggie nodded.

“Lucy is going to help you, ok? She’s got a lot of experience with the wobbles right now.” Wieke explained.

Lucy was there then, helping her stand up, and leading her into the guest room on the first floor that she and Keira had spent so many weeks in after she’d been released from the hospital. Lucy tucked Aggie into bed about thirty minutes later, she kissed the young forward on the forehead, telling her Keira would be in to say goodnight in a few minutes.

True to her words, the mattress dipped under Keira’s weight. Aggie opened her heavy eyes to watch her deposit a bottle of water and electrolytes.

“Hey sweetheart, I thought you were already asleep, can I help you sit up and you drink something and take another dose of pain medication for me?” Keira asked.

Aggie hummed, leaning up just enough for Keira to stuff a pillow behind her back. Aggie took her meds and drank a bit uncoordinatedly, getting a bit sloshed down her front.

Aggie sank back against the pillow, eyes drifting shut. Keira smiled softly at the younger woman, her heart squeezing. She leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead and murmured a goodnight to her before slipping out of the room.

“Ok sweetheart, you want to tell us what all of this is about?” Lucy asked as Keira came back into the room, effectively sandwiching Wieke between them.

The younger woman’s cheeks flushed immediately as she stammered out a very unconvincing, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Wieke.” Keira said gently.

Wieke threw her head back, scrubbed at her eyes.

“It’s so stupid.” She groaned.

“It’s not honey.” Lucy told her.

“It is! You know her! You know how she is! She will have sex with anything that moves! I…I…no! No. She is my friend. I care about her as my friend. I will not let it go further. I can’t.” Wieke cried, breaking down abruptly, “I can’t. It hurts.”

“Baby.” Both Lucy and Keira cooed.

Wieke shook her head, “No, I can’t. She…it already hurts. I…we…”

“What happened baby?” Lucy soothed as she rubbed her arm.

“We…at her birthday party, I gave her the gift I made for her, I told her I got it from someone at home and not that I made it. She told me it was gorgeous and I told her she was too…she…I was so stupid. I thought…I thought maybe it would be different…she never looked at me like that again…she went home with someone else that night.” She cried.

Wieke curled into Lucy’s arms, Keira rested her chin on her shoulder, effectively squishing her between them while she cried.

“It’s not stupid.” Keira said softly, “Shhh, just listen a minute ok, it’s not stupid. I know how bad it feels, ok. When Lucy first came to Manchester, she was a bit of a mess too, and I was too really, and I’m not telling you this to say that you and Aggie might be sitting with a younger woman curled in your arms crying about another woman who’s a mess, but to show you that you’re not the first in this place. You won’t be the last either darlin. But how you feel, it isn’t stupid.”

Eventually Wieke nodded into Lucy’s shoulder soaked with tears.

“Do you want to sleep with us tonight?” Lucy asked softly.

“Can I?”

“Of course you can, you know you always can sweetheart. Come on, let’s go get ready for bed.” Lucy replied, nudging her up.

Wieke fell asleep before Keira and Lucy were even in bed. She’d wore herself out from playing the full game and then crying her body’s weight in tears.

“I love you, Keira.” Lucy smiled softly, kissing Keira.

“I love you.”

“I’m really glad I got my shit together all those years ago, got to have that time with you when we were young. But I’m even more glad that I get to have this time with you now.” Lucy told her.

“Me too Luce.”

“Hey Lucy?” Keira asked a few minutes later.

Lucy hummed to show she was listening, “Do you think they’ll figure it out?”

“Aggie and Wieke?”

“Yeah.”

Lucy sighed, “I don’t know Kei. I don’t know if Wieke could give herself over to the risk. I know Aggie adores her, I mean, who doesn’t. I think Aggie might spook if she knew how much Wieke felt.”

Lucy was quiet, Keira was almost to sleep.

“I thought you were going to spook.” Lucy admitted.

“When we were younger?” Keira asked.

“Yeah. You were 19 when we got together. I was so much older than you. I was a mess. You were…god you are so beautiful. You were so awkward and shy and had such a weird sense of humor. I had no idea what to do with you, but I fell so hard so fast. I was so scared. And then I did fuck it all up a few years later.”

“I was so awkward back then. I mean I’m still awkward now, but at least I own it now. And you weren’t alone in fucking it all up Luce. We both had a hand in that. But we got back to each other in the end, and now? Now we’re better than ever Luce.”

Lucy smiled over at her in the dark of their room. She reached over Wieke and Narla, squeezing Keira’s side lightly.

“You know, one day, when we have kids, we’re so screwed about getting them to sleep in their own bed when they’re upset.” Keira teased.

Lucy groaned, “She was crying! What was I supposed to do? Let her go sleep by herself and cry more?”

“You’re gonna be such a good mum.” Keira told her warmly.

“You are going to be amazing.” Lucy replied softly.

A few days later Keira, Lucy, Wieke, and Aggie’s parents sat in the waiting room of the surgery center. It would be a quick surgery, it wouldn’t even involve a full incision, just two little cuts and two stitches with the robot and then a few more stitches where the little cuts were and she’d be back to them. Lucy’s nerves were frayed, she clung to Keira’s hand tightly the whole time. Keira rested her chin on her shoulder, pressing the occasional kiss to her cheek.

Aggie’s parents went to see her first, they came back a few minutes later, a bit tense still. Lucy, Keira, and Wieke went next.

Aggie was pale, she looked like hell.

“Hey there kiddo.” Lucy murmured leaning down to kiss her forehead, “How’re you feeling?”

“Bad.” Aggie shivered.

Keira and Lucy both nodded, Keira broke out the post surgery blanket she’d gotten Lucy years before and wrapped the young forward up in it. She kissed her on the forehead as well, pushing her hair out of her face a bit.

“You just cold or something else?”

“No. Everything feels bad. Hurts. Feel sick.”

“Ok sweetheart. I’m going to go chat with the nurse a minute.” Keira told her.

“It’s alright. Anesthesia makes me feel really bad too. Keira knows how to talk to them to get you some relief.”

Aggie blinked tears out of her eyes, she was shivering from the cold, probably shaking under that from the trauma on her body.

“I woke up during it.” Aggie cried.

“What?” Wieke asked, it was the first time she’d spoken since seeing Aggie.

Lucy closed her eyes, she knew it happened, it was so rare.

“That sounds scary.” Lucy told her softly.

Aggie whimpered then, a cry breaking loose. Wieke moved then, pulling her into her arms, holding her tightly as she cried.

Keira came to get Lucy then, where the nurse explained that Aggie woke up and then got a higher dose pushed immediately to knock her back out. Lucy pushed her hands through her hair, twirling the piece of hair at the back of her neck as she listened.

“Wieke’s got her right now. I think I need a minute.” Lucy told Keira before all but running out of the surgical center.

Keira stepped back into the room with Aggie and Wieke with the nurse who gave Aggie something for the nausea. The rest would just take time. Keira helped Aggie change back into real clothes, careful of her booted foot, and she and Wieke got her out to the car.

They set her up back in the guest room again. She was still shaky and cold when they tucked her into bed.

“I’ve got to go find Luce. You ok with her?” Keira asked quietly.

“Yeah, I’ve got her.” Wieke nodded.

“Hey Aggie, can I get you some water?” Wieke asked stepping back in the room.

“Tastes terrible.” Aggie said making a face.

“How about some juice then? Maybe a coke?”

“Coke yeah.”

“Do you want something to eat?”

“No I feel sick still.”

Wieke came back with a coke in hand, she hesitated, then climbed into bed with her.

“Come here, I’ll rub your back.”

Aggie whimpered a few times in her sleep, Wieke soothed her each time. Once she even pressed a kiss to her hair, murmuring in Dutch to her until she relaxed back into her arms. She slipped away after a few hours to retrieve the lunch she ordered for both of them.

“Can you wake up for me?” Wieke asked, coaxing her awake.

Aggie blinked heavily.

“I got us some lunch. Here, I’ll help you sit up some.” Wieke murmured, helping her up a bit and stuffing pillows behind her.

Aggie ate her soup in a bit of a daze.

“You still feel bad?” Wieke asked taking the bowl from her.

“Yeah. I need to pee though.”

“Come on, I’ll help keep you steady.” Wieke sprang out of bed lightly, coming around to take hold of Aggie’s sweatshirt.

Aggie was shaking violently when Wieke helped her back into bed a few minutes later.

“The anesthesia really was hard on you.” Wieke said soothing her as best she could

Aggie nodded, and she scrubbed at her face where tears were spilling down. Wieke tugged her hands away, gently wiping the tears away. Wieke perched next to her, one leg tucked under her body as she took in the shaky and pale woman in front of her. She felt her heart squeeze painfully as Aggie reached for her hand, almost unsure if she was allowed to ask for the comfort. Wieke laced their fingers together easily, settling both of them with the contact.

Chapter Text

Recovery

Recovery was hard. Aggie knew it would be, but she hadn’t expected it to be quite like it was. She was exhausted, tense, and being unable to relax made it hard for her body to let her ankle cooperate with physical therapy. She spent so much time with her jaw clenched tightly that her ears hurt.

Each step was painstakingly taken, each jump jarring, each weight lifted heavier than it should have been. For weeks. Aggie was crashing and burning. She snapped at everyone trying to be helpful, including Keira, which meant Lucy nearly rang her neck with how protective she was of a newly healed Keira.

She was supposed to be cleared after six weeks, 8 weeks before the start of the world cup. Six weeks came and she failed her fitness test. She was devastated, furious, and scared. Mille tried to talk to her as captain, Aggie shoved past her, angry tears spilling down her cheeks without her consent. Lucy was there then, attempting to wrap an arm around her shoulders to slow her down and ease her. She shook Lucy off shouting at her to leave her alone. She slammed the doors to the locker room open revealing half a dozen surprised teammates looking up at her. She yanked her bag out of her locker, stuffed her things in it, and stalked back to the door.

“Don’t.” Aggie nearly spat at Wieke as she shoved the doors to the exit open.

Wieke raised an eyebrow as she passed, turning to see the small group of team leaders watching on from a distance. Lucy shook her head. Wieke’s heart dropped. She made her way to the locker room, gathering her own things much more calmly and made her way to the exit. She drove home, got her Australian Shepard Blue, and both of them set off towards Aggie’s.

Wieke rang the bell, knowing Aggie was unlikely to answer it. She waited a few minutes, then used the key she had snagged from Keira and Lucy’s house and copied. She opened the door to silence. She wandered through the house, looking for Aggie and finally found her, curled under a mountain of shaking blankets, loud sobs making it even clearer where she was.

Blue barked once, trotting over and jumping up on Aggie’s bed and laying down on top of her. Aggie squeaked, throwing the covers off.

“What are you doing here?” She demanded of Wieke.

“Hoping Blue helps.” Wieke shrugged, settling herself in the reading chair Aggie had laundry stacked on that looked otherwise unused.

Aggie glared at her through her tears, flopping back against the pillows.

“Just let me wallow.” Aggie begged.

“I’m not stopping you. You need to feel the feelings, and that’s ok, I’m just here to sit with you. Blue too.” Wieke told her calmly.

Blue, upon hearing this information, wiggled further into Aggie’s arms, tucking her head on her shoulder. Aggie turned into her then, crying into the dogs fur, clinging to her. Wieke stayed in her chair as Blue comforted Aggie. She felt her heart crack as she watched Aggie break down. She cried for what seemed like hours but was likely only about thirty minutes before she exhausted herself into hiccups and then stillness, tears still leaking occasionally. Wieke stood then, making her way into Aggie’s en suite to retrieve a wet cloth for her to wipe her tear stained face.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Wieke asked gently.

“Not really.” Aggie whispered, feeling the shame of how she’d lashed out at everyone start to wash over her.

Wieke hummed, “Will you tell me anyways please?”

Aggie lay quiet another long moment before repositioning the sleepy Australian Sheppard on her chest.

“I only loaded 80%.”

“80 is not bad.” Wieke frowned.

“I was supposed to be above 90.” Aggie snapped.

Blue startled awake.

“Sorry.” Aggie said tightly, then much more softly, “Sorry. I shouldn’t snap at you when you’re being so kind.”

“Thank you. I get it though. You wanted to be through this already. Do you think it’ll be another week or two?”

“I don’t know. I thought I was doing everything right. I thought everything in there was working right. I…I don’t…what if it doesn’t load to 90 again? The world cup is 10 weeks away, rosters come out in 6. Camp is in 4! I have to be there! I can’t miss the world cup!” Aggie spun out.

Wieke their fingers together, squeezing, as Aggie’s breathing escalated until she was hyperventilating.

“Aggie, hey, you’re having a panic attack. I need you to take a breath for me.” Wieke soothed.

She tapped Blue, getting the dog off Aggie and pulled her into a sitting position on the bed.

“Can’t!” Aggie gasped, eyes wide with panic as the realization crashed over her and she started gasping even worse.

“You can. I’m right here, just squeeze my hand, focus on me, ok? Look at me, we’re going to breathe together ok? Big breathe in, then out, ready?” And Wieke took exaggerated slow calm breaths.

Aggie’s eyes were wild with panic as she shook her head, gasping, eyes darting around. Wieke cupped her cheek with her other hand, forcing her to still and meet her eyes.

“With me.” Wieke encouraged.

Aggie stuttered her gasping, trying to slow and take a bigger breath.

“Good. That’s good, keep going, you’re safe. I’m right here.” Aggie’s breathing kept stuttering as she leveled out, hiccupping and speeding back up a few times, but Wieke guided her through it.

“You’re doing so good. Keep breathing for me, just like that.” Wieke encouraged gently.

Tears spilled over, soaking Wieke’s hand cupping her cheek, splashing onto their interlaced fingers in Aggie’s lap. Blue nudged at both their thighs with her cold nose, Aggie’s attention snapped to her, bringing her down even more as she reached a trembling hand out to the dog.

“Feel ok?” Wieke as Aggie’s breathing leveled out seemingly for good.

Aggie was still trembling, her body exhausted from the emotional gauntlet the day had been. She sagged forward, forehead pressed to Wieke’s shoulder. She shook her head.

Wieke laughed quietly, “Yeah, panic attacks usually leave me feeling terrible too.”

“I hate this.” Aggie whispered.

Wieke hummed, “It’s pretty awful. You did a really good job matching my breathing though.” She reached a hand around her carefully, resting it on Aggie’s side.

“You’ve had this before?” Aggie asked.

“Many times. Was this your first panic attack?”

Aggie nodded.

“I’m so sorry. Can I get you something? Or we can order food?” Wieke offered.

“I don’t really feel hungry.” Aggie admitted.

“I know. You will though.” Wieke sighed, working her phone with one hand, the other rubbing soothing circles on Aggie’s side.

“I think I need to shower.” Aggie said after Wieke put in their dinner order.

“That might make you feel better.” Wieke agreed.

Aggie stood on wobbly legs. She looked down at her feet under her, swallowing a wave of emotion that her feet could carry her around fine but couldn’t put her on the pitch.

The shower was magic, bleeding out the stress. She put a hair mask in, just to give herself a reason to stay under the spray longer before getting out and reluctantly changing into soft shorts and a t-shirt before plaiting her hair in a loose braid down her back.

“Perfect timing, food just got here.” Wieke called as she heard Aggie’s feet on the stairs.

“Thank you.” Aggie told her quietly as she came into the living room.

Wieke smiled, something incredibly soft behind her guarded expression. The two ate their dinner curled on opposite sides of the couch, Blue between them after having her own dinner.

“Will you be alright by yourself tonight?” Wieke asked gently as she threw out their dinner trash.

Aggie paused, she wanted Wieke to stay, every part of her screaming for it really, for the soft Dutch woman with her adorable heart melting accent and kindness.

“Would you stay with me or in the guest room?” Aggie heard herself ask.

Wieke cocked her head questioningly, “I thought you didn’t let women sleep in your bed.”

Aggie felt shame pool in her stomach, she shook her head, “You’re different.”

Wieke smiled sadly, as if she didn’t believe her, “I’ll stay, but I’m staying down here.”

The rejection tasted like metal in her mouth. She blinked back embarrassed tears.

“You can go home. I’ll be fine.” She told Wieke, turning away.

“Whoa there.” Wieke snagged her by the elbow and Aggie fought not to shake her off and run up the stairs before real tears could spill over.

“Hey, what is it? Do you really want me to stay with you up there?” Wieke asked confused.

Aggie nodded, not trusting her voice.

“Ok.” Wieke soothed, “I need to take Blue out for a nice walk, but if you want to go lay down after today that’s fine.”

“I’ll come.” Aggie said quickly, heading for the door where their shoes lined up next to each other.

Blue sat down expectantly as Wieke slipped her harness over her and clipped her in. The three of them set out around the neighborhood, walking for over an hour, filling the silence with careful small talk. They stopped at the park on the way back to Aggie’s townhouse, unleashing Blue and running her through the obstacle course. It was one she’d been through, but not very often, so her tail wagged happily as she snuffled out her new path out where she was rewarded with the chase toy on a line system that ran throughout the park. She went bounding after it excitedly running off another twenty minutes of steam. She came back, tongue lolling out of her mouth as she panted, tail wagging happily as she was clipped back into her harness and they set out for the last twenty minutes of the walk to the townhouse.

Wieke situated Blue on the makeshift dog bed downstairs, knowing she’d join them in bed not ten minutes later, but not having the heart to tell Aggie that as she set up the blankets for the dog.

Wieke took a quick shower, changing into a set of pajamas she’d had the foresight to pack. She climbed into the opposite side of the bed to Aggie as Aggie got up to finish getting ready for bed. Wieke responded to a few texts, namely Lucy, Kiera, and Millie asking if Aggie was ok and if she made it home alright. She nervously responded to each of them, including the information that she was staying with Aggie for the night.

Lucy: Make sure the downstairs sheets have been changed since the last bout of escapades.

Keira: Ok sweetheart, let me know if you two need anything.

Millie: See you tomorrow!

Wieke hesitated, hovering over the keyboard as she worked out what to tell Lucy.

Wieke: I’m not sleeping down there.

Lucy: Are you sleeping on the couch then? I’m sure that bed is plenty comfortable. You’ve slept in it before when you were sick.

Wieke: Aggie asked me to stay with her upstairs.

Lucy: Ah, ok, be safe.

Wieke: We’re literally in bed with the doors all locked up, we’re safe.

Lucy: I meant with your heart kiddo.

Wieke: It’s not like that. You know she doesn’t feel like that.

Lucy: But you do, don’t hurt yourself to help her.

Wieke: I’m fine Mum.

Lucy: Alrighty, night kids

“Lucy and Keira say goodnight.” Wieke said as Aggie pulled the covers back to join her.

Aggie hummed, reaching for her phone to text them both back herself.

Aggie to Lucy: Night Luce, thanks for checking in, sorry I was so awful today.

Aggie to Keira: Night Kei, I’m sorry I was so mean today. I was upset, and that’s no excuse I know. I’ll do better.

Aggie to Mille: Sorry Millie, I’ll do better.

Mille: You’re good kiddo, thanks.

Lucy: Sweetheart I get it, I’ve been there more times than I wanted to be too. Be nice to yourself too. And to Wieke.

Aggie to Lucy: She helped a lot.

Lucy: She cares about you.

Aggie: She’s the best.

Aggie: Maybe one day I’ll deserve her.

Lucy: Honey

Lucy: That’s not how that works.

Aggie: I know, she’d never even consider me. Just wishful thinking.

Aggie: Night Luce. I texted Keira, but I guess she’s already asleep.

Lucy: We’ll talk more about this, but yeah Kei and Narla are both snoring over here.

Aggie: Wieke and Blue will be soon I think.

Lucy: Is she not downstairs?

Aggie: I asked her to stay with me.

Lucy: Didn’t think you invited anyone into the sanctuary of your bed.

Aggie: Wieke is different.

Lucy: You should tell her that.

Aggie: No

She closed her phone then, putting it on the charger and glancing over at Wieke, curled on her side facing her, blinking tiredly at her.

“Thank you for today.” Aggie said softly, “For everything, really.”

Wieke smiled, “You don’t have to thank me, I’ll always be here for you.”

And that warmed Aggie’s soul while squeezing her heart painfully.

At some point in the night they’d shifted, Aggie curling herself into Wieke’s arms, both her arms wound around Wieke, under her back and her face was shoved in her shoulder. She was as close she could get without crawling into her clothes.

Wieke woke groggy and confused, itching at her nose and froze. The night crashing over her as the realization of how Aggie was curled around her hit. The sun was up already, they probably still had another thirty minutes on their alarms, so she stayed still other than carefully inching to her phone and taking a selfie of how curled together they were. Her heart squeezed as she squinted at the screen for the details. She shifted around just a few centimeter, readjusting so Aggie’s neck was at a better angle. She froze as little puffs of breathing hit her neck, sending goosebumps all over her body. She closed her eyes, willing her body to shut down the less than acceptable reaction coiling through her at the feeling of Aggie with her like that. She was far too aware of every point they were touching, Aggie’s arms curled under her, her head in her neck, her leg over hers. Aggie shuffled then, pulling herself even closer with her leg. Wieke felt her breath hitch, then carefully she slipped her hand a bit lower, pushing Aggie’s hips just enough to fully hoist her ontop of her. Aggie sighed into her neck, now fully ontop of her, clinging to her. She snapped another picture, then before giving herself time to think about it, she sent it to Aggie’s phone.

They lay like that another twenty minutes until Aggie’s alarm cut through the morning. Aggie groaned, her arms tightening under Wieke. It took another minute before Aggie was awake enough to silence the alarm before immediately settling back into her comfortable position on top of Wieke. She nuzzled into her neck, releasing a sleepy sigh. Wieke grinned, this version of Aggie was adorable, and so unlike the one she roomed with on away trips that gruffly sat up and glared at the bed while her brain came on line. Wieke rubbed up and down her spine softly, getting another soft sigh into her neck.

The second alarm had her moving quicker, actually opening her eyes this time as she popped up to silence it before flopping back onto Wieke who grunted at the force. Aggie froze, every single muscle locking down in an instant. She’d never been more awake in her life as she slid her arms back out from under Wieke and used them to press up, looking down with wide eyes. Wieke grinned, cheeks pink. Aggie pushed off immediately scooting to her side of the bed so fast she nearly dumped herself into the floor. Her cheeks were scarlett, red spreading down her neck and up to the tips of her ears.

“Sleep ok?” Wieke asked, feigning a level of calm she was trying to achieve.

“I’m so sorry!” Aggie sqeaked horrified.

Wieke laughed, “Why? You were comfy. Almost like a weighted blanket, except your fingers are a bit…how do you stay…” She scrunched her face in thought and Aggie nearly died from the cuteness “bony? I think? You were digging into my back a bit.”

Aggie nodded from under the pillow she was holding over her face.

“I can’t believe I was on top of you.” Aggie groaned.

“I can’t believe you’re that cuddly. You never cuddle like that.” Wieke teased happily.

“I’m never going to hear the end of this.” Aggie groaned.

Wieke laughed as she tugged the pillow out of her hands.

“You’re fine.” Wieke murmured gently, settling close to her side.

Aggie swallowed, face still bright red from embarrassment.

“You ok?” Wieke asked gently.

“No!” Aggie groaned.

Wieke poked at her then, “Come on you big softie, you make food while I take Blue out for a walk.”

Aggie peaked her eye open, the sight of Wieke half leaning over her, looking so teasingly pleased, eyes twinkling in the sun pouring in from the window was almost too much. She slammed her eyes shut, nodding. She waited until she felt Wieke get out of bed to open her eyes again, only to immediately regret it as she caught the full expanse of her bare back as she pulled on a sports bra and sweatshirt. Aggie felt heat pool and coil low in her stomach and rolled over to shove her face in the pillow, wondering what she’d done to the universe to deserve this test.

She shoved out of bed when she heard retreating footsteps down the hall. She got dressed and made her way downstairs to start breakfast. She decided she didn’t need coffee, the adrenaline rush from the morning was enough. Not to mention the best night of sleep she’d had in months. She plated breakfast just as Wieke and Blue came back inside, the scene entirely too domestic for Aggie’s sanity. She swallowed, watching as Wieke moved through her home as if it was her own.

It’s just a crush.

She’s just beautiful.

Everyone adores her.

She’s too good.

No.

She squeezed her eyes shut, willing herself to turn away from the scene and back to the fridge where she poured them both juice. Wieke’s preferred tea made to perfection. Somewhere in her brain she wondered when she’d learned that. Wieke’s smile was dizzying as she set the cup down after her first sip.

They drove into the training center together, not needing two cars. Blue could join them at puppycare for the day with the other dogs since it was a longer training day.

Aggie parked the car and set her jaw, staring up at the training center sign.

Wieke reached over, interlacing their fingers, “You’ve got this. I believe in you. Slow and steady. You’ll be back out there in front of me soon enough banging in goals.”

Aggie closed her eyes, letting Wieke’s comfort try to take hold. She nodded then, turning off the car.

It was a grueling day. She swallowed down her words more than once, breathing deeply, doing another rep when she wanted to stop. She pushed herself further on the pitch, lifted the weights that were heavier than they should have been still, recalling the feeling that her body memorized of waking up in Wieke’s arms. She may have only been conscious of it for a few seconds, but her body felt like it took a screenshot of the moment and all she wanted was to crawl back into its softness.

She barely heard Lucy come up next to her as she reracked her weights.

“How was your night?” Lucy asked, an edge of something in her voice.

“Fine.” Aggie shrugged. Lied.

“How’d you sleep?”

“Better than I have in a while.” She admitted.

Lucy hummed. Aggie looked at her then, searching. She could see barely controlled something behind her eyes and stepped back surprised.

“I’m going to tell you this once and only once.” Lucy began softly, even if her face was hard.

Aggie swallowed, nodded.

“You will not play with her heart. You will not drag her into your bed just to kick her out of it. You were wrong to say that one day you’d be worthy of her goodness. You already are, you’re a good egg Beever-Jones. But if you play with her I will personally kick your ass from here to kingdom come, and then I’ll feed you to Viv. Do you understand me?”

Aggie felt her eyes widen in surprise as she nodded, “Yes.” She squeaked.

Lucy appraised her again, “You’re doing good. Keep it up.”

Aggie sagged as Lucy disappeared around the corner. She had a bit of whiplash at that.

Aggie made her comeback two weeks later, twenty minutes at the end of the game against West Ham where she assisted Wieke’s second goal of the match. Wieke launched herself into her arms, screaming in her ear before disappearing into Lucy’s embrace as the team gathered around them.

Keira made her comeback two weeks later for the last game of the season. Aggie came to a dead stop in the door to the changeroom. Keira was there, her back to her. Instead of Walsh on the back of her shirt, she had Bronze-Walsh. And the twinkling of her engagement ring still on her hand, she’d take it off before they walked out, but she’d wore it for warmups. Lucy was behind her, gently pushing her into the room and giving her a confused look before her eyes nearly fell out of her head as she caught a glimpse at Keira.

Aggie grinned then, looking around at the giddiness on so many of her teammates faces. Hannah Hampton blinking hard, always one for sappy tears. Sjo stood next to her, a soft smile on her face.

“Think you’ll add his name to yours Nusken?” Aggie asked teasingly as she walked to her locker.

Sjo snorted, “He’s not playing in a World Cup. No. Makes sense for them though.” She nodded over at Lucy and Keira.

Lucy the definition of heart eyes falling out of her head in awe as she traced the Bronze part of Keira’s shirt.

Millie rolled her eyes and pretend gagged behind them.

“Alright, cute as that is, we’ve got a game to win. Let’s get our head in the game please.” Sonia called.

Lucy changed still dazed, grin seemingly etched in her face as she lined up next to Keira for the team picture. They all knew when they shrugged out of their jackets by the series of collective gasps and squeals that built throughout the stadium.

Aggie turned to Wieke, nudging her arm, “You know that was happening?”

“No, but I love it.”

Aggie nodded, headed to the center circle. Keira and Wieke behind her in the midfield, Lucy at the back.

She didn’t know Sarina was there until she saw her with Lucy and Keira after the game. Lucy’s tears still wet on her cheeks from the pride she had in Keira’s first game back. Aggie waited off to the side nervously until Sarina came her way.

“Excellent shift today Aggie.” Sarina told her with a bright smile.

Aggie felt something in her relax, “Got to be ready for the World Cup.”

Sarina nodded, “Ankle has a clean bill of health is the report I’ve gotten. Looked good out there.”

“All’s as it should be.”

“I heard you had some trouble in the rehabbing process, dealing with the injury.”

Aggie swallowed tightly, “It was harder than I thought it would be. It was very….teaching. I didn’t enjoy the learning bit of that, but I did it. And if I ever have to do it again I have a better starting point for expectations.”

Sarina appraised her a long moment, picking her apart. Aggie did her best not to squirm. Finally Sarina nodded, she reached out and squeezed her arm, tossing a subtle wink over her shoulder as she moved on to speak with Hamps. Aggie felt her feet shifting as the world moved under her.

“Hey there kiddo. You ok?” Keira asked as her arm locked around her waist.

“Just wasn’t expecting Sarina.” Aggie told her.

Keira hummed, “That’s quite the stress response honey. We’ll talk more at camp next week about this, ok? You had a great game today. I’m proud of you.”

Aggie gaped at her a moment, “Keira! You played your first game back today!” She all but shouted.

Keira laughed brightly, “I did!”

“You did amazing!”

Keira rolled her eyes, “Come on kiddo, we’ve got a crowd to clap.”

Lucy joined them then, taking up her place at Keria’s arm, pushing her ahead of them to get her applause and cheers. Keira shyly accepted it. Her cheeks were flushed and she kept giggling, trying to tuck herself into Lucy’s side who merely pushed her back into the front for her flowers.

Chapter Text

The World Cup

Aggie nearly threw up during the pre-pitch inspection from nerves. It was her first world cup. The stadium was massive. Bigger than Wembley. Lucy and Keira ambled along in front of her, hand in hand, seemingly unphased. Hamps was walking with the rest of the Goal Keeper Union, chattering on about something she couldn’t quite hear.

The crowd was deafening even during the warm up, the stadium fit well over 100,000 fans and it was rumored to be sold out for the opening game: The US vs England on US home soil. It was a sea of red, white, and blue, pockets of England fans throughout, and a strong traveling contingent behind the goal. Beth tossed an arm around her shoulders, grinning as they strode back down the tunnel to change for the anthems and the game.

Aggie knew that she’d have a bigger role in this tournament because of her Euro’s run. She’d been getting more and more playing time, especially since Fran’s retirement. She and Alessia had settled into somewhat of a dual 9 role, just a bit more forward than Arsenal’s plan of Stina up front and Alessia right behind her. She looked over at Alessia tugging the rainbow armband into position on Leah’s arm, carefully tucking in the sleeve. It made her feel aggressively single, and it made her miss Wieke. She pushed that thought out of her mind and shoved herself into her shirt.

When she scored in the 28^th minute the whole team dragged her into their embrace as if she’d scored the gold medal winning goal. She looked back, finding Keira, then Lucy, grounding herself in her England and Chelsea team Mums.

They came up against the Netherlands during the quarter-finals. Her hands trembled the whole ride to the stadium. She hadn’t seen Wieke in almost six weeks. They’d texted, called a few times even, but now someone was going to the semis and someone was going home. And Aggie knew it in her bones. England was going through. The Netherlands were going home.

Her feet were moving before she realized it, breaking into a massive grin as she moved.

“Wieke!” Aggie squealed, slamming into her.

Wieke laughed brightly, “I missed you too Aggie.”

Aggie clung to her, burying her face in her neck, blocking out the world a moment. Wieke swayed them softly, one of her hands holding Aggie to her, the other rubbing circles on her back.

“You ok?” Wieke asked softly.

“No.” Aggie whispered back, surprising herself, “I don’t want to play you.”

Wieke hummed, “Well, whatever the outcome, we will be just fine Aggie. We’ll be home at Cobham before you know it, back in the same kit.”

Her Dutch accent was more pronounced after weeks around the Netherlands camp.

“How is the Netherlands Camp?” Aggie asked.

“It’s really good. We’ve got a massive pool competition going on, best score when we win gets the betting money. Viv has been teaching me some of her fancy footwork that’s too cool to use in a game. It’s been fun. What about England?”

Aggie squeezed her, still not letting go, “It’s been really good. Lucy and Keira are doing wedding stuff, I don’t think they want to be though, but the team has rallied and it’s honestly chaos. Lucy has her big board. She let Grace put one of the buttons in a new place, but otherwise that is her board. I’ve played a lot of mario kart, still bad at it.”

“Many shells?”

“So many.” Aggie whined.

Wieke chuckled, the sound music to Aggie’s soul.  

“Aggie, are you alright?” Wieke asked gently.

“I just missed you.” Aggie told her quietly.

Wieke softened in her arms, Aggie felt the ghost of a kiss brush into her hair and she nearly sobbed.

“How about tonight we hang out after the game?” Wieke asked.

“Yes!” Aggie nearly shouted in her ear.

“Lucy and Keira want to see me too, but you’re coming with.”

Aggie’s excitement halved, she wanted time alone with Wieke. Really, she wanted to curl up in Wieke’s arms, just like she’d been so horrifically embarrassed to do so many months ago now. The tournament had taken a lot out of her mentally, emotionally, and physically and Wieke’s arms were a balm to her weary soul.

“They won’t get mad?” She asked smally.

She practically heard Wieke roll her eyes.  

Aggie was right. England were through to the Semis and the Netherlands were headed home. As excited as she was to have managed a goal, widening the scoreline 5-3 in the 87^th minute, she felt a pang for her Dutch friends. She saw Viv first, standing off to the side near Beth. Beth celebrating with their friends before she sobered a bit and made her way to Viv, gently wrapping her up in a hug. Aggie made the rounds to her England teammates, stopping off to congratulate and consol a few Dutch players she knew from spending so much time around Wieke.

She took a deep breath, finally setting her sights on the Dutch midfielder currently tucked in Keira and Lucy’s arms. Her heart nearly cracked in half when she realized Wieke was sobbing into Keira’s shoulder. She stepped in, adding another protective layer from the cameras and prying eyes.

“I’m so proud of you.” Wieke hiccup yelled into Keira’s ear, “You’ve had such a terrible year with your injury and you’re going to a World Cup semi-final.”

Keira kissed the top of the younger midfielder’s head, soothing her even as she blushed bright red from the attention.

“You ready to go in?” Lucy asked softly.

Wieke nodded, Keira hummed her assent, and Aggie let go, letting the two of them tuck Wieke between them as they made their way to the tunnel. Lucy paused partly, opening an arm to Aggie who scurried to join them then.

“Thought Wieke told you that you’re joining us?” Lucy asked squeezing her side.

“Wasn’t sure you’d be ok with it.” Aggie admitted.

Lucy ruffled her hair affectionately. The group split off to shower and change before catching the busses back to the hotel. The England and Netherlands teams were fairly intermixed with couples and friends so it had already been cleared for the busses to be a mixed zone, a few ie Viv and Beth, split off and took a car on their own to wherever they were going for their night off before afternoon recovery.

Aggie melted when Wieke rested her head on her shoulder on the bus ride back to the hotel. She turned lightly, barely dropping a kiss to her head, Wieke hummed contentedly.

The two younger players followed Lucy and Keira through the hotel, snagging their take away dinners from the team rooms and making their way to Lucy and Keira’s room.

Aggie laughed upon entering, “How is even your hotel room put together?"

Keira snorted, “Have you met Lucy? It’s part of her calming routine to iron our socks.”

“Hey!” Lucy cried.

Keira grinned, leaning over to give her a soft peck on the lips to ease the teasing.

Aggie sprawled out on the clearly unused queen sized bed, Wieke clamoring in next to her. Lucy shooed both of them further up the bed making room for her and Keira, essentially having a picnic on the bed. The four chatted, Wieke regaling them with tales from the Netherlands camp, Lucy and Keira providing a highlight reel of England camp moments that had Aggie wheezing with laughter even though she’d been there for some of them the first time around.

Eventually the giggles slowly relaxed into something sleepier. Keira retreated to her own bed after changing into what were so clearly Lucy’s clothes she’d decided were pajamas.

“Aggie are you spending the night too?” Lucy asked as she stood and stretched, a concerning number of joints creaking and popping.

“Uh…I don’t…am I?” Aggie asked half to Lucy half to Wieke.

“If you want.” Wieke shrugged with a smile.

Aggie did want. She knew if she cuddled up with Wieke that Lucy and Keira would tease her relentlessly, but they’d also keep their mouths shut to anyone else. She nodded.

“I need to run to my room and get clothes. Wieke do you need anything?” Aggie asked hopping up.

Wieke shook her head, “I brought an overnight bag.”

“I’ll be right back then.” Aggie said nearly sprinting out of the room.

She changed into her pajamas at light speed, left a note for Millie that she was out for the night, not that the defender would be surprised given her usual tournament track record, and knocked on the door to the room. Lucy opened it, now in her own pajamas, which Aggie was surprised were actual pajamas and not old kit.

Wieke was curled up next to Keira, her head pillowed on the older women’s chest, her eyes closed. Keira played with her hair softly, it brought Aggie up short. Keira usually wasn’t very tactile. She was one of the most awkward huggers Aggie had ever seen, even with Lucy. Yet here she was cuddling the younger midfielder.

“You leaving me to sleep alone at a sleepover?” Aggie teased gently.

Wieke rolled her eyes, pushing up out of Keira’s cuddle, and crawled sleepily back into the other bed.

Lucy locked the security bolt and flipped out the lights. She walked over to the end of the room, flipping out a lamp, stopping to drop a kiss to both of their foreheads, exactly light a Mum would tucking them in. Aggie relaxed, letting herself be soothed like that. Once the lights were out, Aggie scooted closer to Wieke, curling herself into the Dutch woman’s side. Wieke laughed in her ear.

“Are we cuddling then?” She murmured.

Aggie froze, “Unless you don’t want to?”

Wieke’s arm slipped around her side, tugging her back in, a silent answer.

It was the best night of sleep Aggie had since the tournament started. She woke to faint light streaming into the room through a crack in the curtains. She was tucked fully on top of Wieke again, completely molded to her, puffs of air hitting her neck where Wieke was turned into her. One of Wieke’s hands was pushed up the side of her shirt, curled along her ribs. Aggie realized with a jolt that both of hers were shoved high up the back of Wieke’s shirt, so much so that she’d exposed most of the woman’s stomach as well. She forced herself to keep breathing even as her body heated up from a mix of emotions and sensations. She closed her eyes, focusing on the soft snores coming from either Lucy or Keira, trying to guess which one of them it was in an effort to calm herself down. Her attention drifted back to Wieke though, soft breaths steady against her. She let herself relax fully again, drifting back off.

The next time she woke it was to soft fingers trailing up a small patch of her side and faint voices.

“I never would have guessed how cuddly she is.” Aggie registered Lucy saying faintly.

“It’s really cute actually.” Keira agreed.

“I think they’re both still asleep. Do you want to go get breakfast? Let the kids sleep in some?” Lucy asked.

“Yeah, bring them something back and then we can get brunch later maybe?”

“Sounds good love.” Lucy agreed.

There was quiet shuffling as the two got ready. Aggie drifting again with Wieke’s continued affections. It was clear to her that Wieke was barely awake too, fingers pausing occasionally before springing back to life slowly.

“Bye kids!” Lucy whispered softly over to them as the door shut with a quiet snick.

It was another few minutes before Wieke sighed. Aggie dragged her tired eyes open, somehow still surprised at the grey blue eyes just a few centimeters away from her own. She smiled, body managing to stay relaxed. Wieke tugged her hand out of her shirt. She tapped her hip softly and Aggie took the request, untangling herself from Wieke and moving to her cold pillow on the other side of the bed. Wieke smiled as she stood slowly and made her way to the bathroom. She returned a few minutes later looking much more alert, hair brushed, teeth brushed if the faint mint meant anything. Aggie smiled.

“You’re beautiful you know.” Aggie told her softly.

Something almost sad crossed Wieke’s expression as she sat back against the pillows. Aggie got up, mimicking her morning routine, and then curled herself around Wieke, resting her head in her lap like a cat. Wieke ran her hand through her hair and Aggie hummed, melting as she dozed in and out of sleep.

Chapter Text

The Aftermath of the World Cup

Wieke let herself hope. Keira and Lucy encouraged her. Aggie fucked it all up making out with a random woman at the party when they won the World Cup a few weeks after that sleepover, someone’s cousin or friend, she wasn’t sure. It was adrenaline, the woman flirted, she didn’t stop her, and then she was kissing Aggie, and Aggie, a bit under the influence and not thinking with her head, went right along with it.

Aggie didn’t even remember it the next day.

She grinned when she saw Wieke with Lucy and Keira when they were back in London, bounding up to them, aiming to scoop Wieke up into a hug but was shouldered off by Lucy. Aggie’s face fell as she came to a stop, looking at the three of them confused.

Wieke turned and walked off in the other direction.

“Wait, Wieke?! Where are you going?” Aggie called trying to step around the couple.

“You’ve done enough Aggie, let her go.” Lucy told her firmly.

“What?” Aggie asked, a hint of confused desperation in her tone now.

Lucy glared at her.

Aggie looked to Keira, who wore a pinched expression, clearly not pleased, but not looking at her with the same furry Lucy was.

“I don’t…what’s wrong?” Aggie asked.

Lucy barked a dark laugh and shook her head, “You don’t even remember?” She demanded.

Aggie stepped back, surprised at her tone, she shook her head, “Lucy, what, what’s wrong?”

Keira let out a rough sigh, running a hand through her own hair, “You don’t remember making out with one of Grace’s cousins at the afterparty then?”

Aggie blinked, clearly surprised, “What? No. Who? I didn’t do that?!”

Keira took pity on her, tapping her phone a few times and displaying clear as day Aggie with someone she didn’t even recognize.

“I thought your frat days were over.” Lucy snapped at her.

Aggie pinched her eyebrows together, “I don’t know who this is. I mean, clearly it didn’t mean anything. We’d just won the world cup! I don’t… why are you mad?! I mean, I saw Tooney fully plant one on Less and they’re both married. It was the heat of the moment for everyone!”

Lucy shook her head, her jaw jumping as she ground her teeth together.

“Keira?” Aggie pleaded.

Keira shook her head, looking over her own shoulder to where Wieke disappeared.

“I should go check on her.” Keira told Lucy gently.

Lucy nodded. She went to turn with her but Aggie dove, clinging to her by the arm.

“Wait! Please! I don’t understand! Why are you mad at me?!” Aggie pleaded, “…OH MY GOD DID I KISS KEIRA?! Lucy, I swear it was just that we won the World Cup! It didn’t mean anything I don’t even remember it!” She started babbling at a higher pitch.

Lucy pinched the bridge of her nose, forcing herself to be calm, “Aggie shut up. No. You didn’t. Just stay away from Wieke. You’ve done enough.”

And with that Lucy was gone. And Aggie was confused, a bit devastated, she had looked so forward to seeing everyone today and now she just wanted to go home. She walked in with her shoulders rounded, not really participating with much of the chatter. It was just a physio check in, players in and out all day. She tried to get Wieke’s attention later, only to be intercepted by an angry Lucy shoving her against the wall after dragging her down an empty hallway.

“I said leave her alone Beever-Jones. You’ve done enough.” Lucy snarled, hands fisted in her shirt as she shoved her against the wall.

Aggie blinked, stunned. She’d never seen Lucy like this. It was scary. She swallowed hard, eyes burning with tears that she refused to let Lucy see now. She practically ran home after that. For weeks she went home and to work. She ate because she had to. She slept because she had to. Lucy glowered at her still at training. Keira still had a pinched look on her face, but it was slowly looking more like pity. Wieke hadn’t spoken to her outside of work.

At England camp in October, Aggie finally swallowed enough of her fear and sought out Keira. Keira had slipped down the hall to the physio room to get tape for her and Lucy’s wedding rings and Aggie followed.

“Keira?” She asked carefully.

Keira turned, pinched expression back.

“Yeah kiddo?” Keira asked gently.

Aggie blinked hard then, sudden tears surprising her.

“Oh.” Keira breathed, dropping the tape and crossing to Aggie, taking her into her arms, “What is it sweetheart?”

Aggie broke then, down into full blown sobs in Keira’s arms. Keira soothed her rubbing big circles on her back as her body racked with sobs.

“I…I….I don’t know why you’re mad at me.” Aggie sobbed.

Keira froze, “What do you mean?” She asked slowly.

“You haven’t hardly spoken to me since we got home!” She sobbed.

Keira sighed, her heart breaking for the pain she’d caused, so caught up in protecting Wieke, she missed what she’d done to Aggie.

“I’m sorry. Shhh, we’ll talk, ok? Shh, just breathe for me.” Keira soothed as she realized Aggie was dangerously close to hyperventilating.

Keira pulled her to one of the couches pressed against the wall, settling her down against her chest, still soothing circles on her back.

“Why is everyone mad at me?” Aggie sobbed, hiccupping with the force of it.

Keira reached up to wipe her own eyes, guilt eating at her now.

“I’ll tell you once I’m sure you’re not going to start having a panic attack, ok?” Keira asked gently.

Aggie nodded into her shoulder, fighting to control her breathing and hold herself together.

Tears were still leaking down her face as she pulled back to look at Keira. Keira closed her eyes at the sight of the wreckage she’d helped cause.

“I’m so sorry Aggie. I owe you such an apology. I didn’t realize how much of a negative effect I was having. I never should have treated you like I have been. I was wrong.”

“But why?” Aggie hiccupped, sobs threatening again.  

Keira wasn’t sure how to say it without saying everything, so she took the shortest route, “Sweetheart, when you kissed that random cousin you don’t even remember at the Euros, you broke Wieke’s heart. She thought…she thought you two were heading somewhere and then she felt like it all blew up in her face.”

Aggie’s eyes went wide as saucers then her hand shot to her mouth, sobs starting afresh.

“I…I didn’t…no. Oh my god. Is that why she has been so cold too? I…no. No this can’t be happening. I…I didn’t mean to!” Aggie sobbed.

She didn’t. It all made horrible sense now though. The devastation that Wieke seemed to radiate the past few weeks, followed by the hard edge, the closed offness towards everyone. The overprotectiveness Keira had for the young woman. Lucy glowering when she got too close to Wieke when she was hurting so much those first few days home.

Aggie spiraled. Not that she’d been doing well in the first place, but now she really wasn’t. Where she’d been tracking Wieke’s every movement, confused, she now couldn’t lift her head to look at her. She’d proved herself right, she wasn’t good enough for Wieke. She’d wanted to be. Then she blew it to hell. She never thought she would even have a chance, she had no idea Wieke wanted her to take one and go after her like that. She threw herself into training. She was the first one there, the last one to leave. She set sights on the Olympic roster and drowned out everything else.

Chapter Text

Intervention

Aggie neglected seeing her family as often as she should have. She barely spent time with her friends. She turned down invites for coffee, lunch, walks, hikes, puppy time. Keira watched on helplessly as she spun out. Lucy thawed out guiltily. Viv didn’t try to take her out at the ankles in their second meeting on the pitch of the season. Wieke started looking worriedly at her, not that Aggie would have noticed.

In March, Aggie was pulled from her new day off routine by a knock at the door. It was early still, but she’d been up a while, she’d done a first clean of the whole townhouse, and had moved to the deeper clean. She’d dusted, mopped, scrubbed the bathrooms down, anything to keep her body moving, wearing herself out. Wieke stood there in the cold spring downpour.

She blinked in surprise.

“Wieke?”

“Can I come in?” Wieke asked.

Aggie started, “Oh, yeah, of course, sorry, I’ll…I…I’ll get you dry clothes.”

Aggie tripped over the edge of the rug in the living room on her way to the stairs, swearing as she hopped on one foot. She ripped open her closet, grabbing the first jumper and shorts combination she lay her hands on and ran back down the stairs.

“Here, come here, I’ll put a towel on the warmer for you.” Aggie called to her as she dropped the clothes on the bathroom counter and turned on the towel warmer. She paused, then draped the sweatshirt over the warmer carefully.

Wieke followed her in then, shivering a bit from the cool rain, and the coolness in the apartment since Aggie had the windows all cracked open for airflow.

“I’ll make tea.” Aggie said slipping around her to run out of the bathroom.

Wieke shivered in the hall bathroom as she stripped out of her damp clothes. She dried her hair with the warm towel and pulled on the warm sweatshirt and fresh shorts. She shivered still as she came out of the bathroom and towards the kitchen. She paused to dig through the ottoman and wrapped herself in a soft blanket before leaning in the doorway to the kitchen. Aggie had her back to her, fiddling with the tea.

Wieke watched her a moment, taking in how tight her body language was, how hunched her shoulders were. She looked around the kitchen, it was spotless, a hint of cleaner filled the air telling Wieke she’d been scrubbing before she’d interrupted her morning off.

“Do you want a snack or anything?” Aggie asked, realizing Wieke was there.

“No, tea’s fine, thanks, let’s sit?”

Aggie carried their teas to the living room and sat down, shifting nervously, not looking up at Wieke really. Wieke settled in the couch, curling her fingers around the warm mug, letting the tea warm her inside and out.

“Aggie?” Wieke asked gently.

Aggie startled, and turned towards her, gaze flicking up to her face and then back down.

“Aggie, are you alright?” Wieke asked softly.

Aggie felt tears prick in the corners of her eyes. She nodded valiantly though.

“Yeah, of course, are you? Why were you out in a downpour?”

Wieke peered over at her, unimpressed, “Needed a walk, wasn’t really paying attention I guess and ended up near you. Figured I could drop in and get a rescue from the storm.”

“Always.” Aggie agreed, glancing over at her a bit longer.

“Why’d you go on such a stroll? You ok?”

Wieke smiled softly, “Just was thinking about how you’ve been since the World Cup. I finally dragged some information out of Keira, wasn’t sure what to do about it and well…here I am. I’m sorry they were so hard on you.”

Aggie shook her head, tears really threatening now.

“I was so confused why you never tried to talk to me all these last few months. I was worried, still am to be fair, and I said something to Lucy about it a while ago. Lucy dodged around it, not really saying anything. I took Keira to dinner last night though while Luce is doing that brand shoot the next two days, figured I’d get some Keira time…she told me some things. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t stop it when I saw them being unfair the first time, and I didn’t notice how hard a time you’ve been having. You…You’re my friend, and I should have paid attention. And maybe I shouldn’t have just shown up unannounced, but I really did just get caught up in the rain.” Wieke continued.

Aggie scrubbed at her eyes, desperately trying to slow the stem of tears. She was unsuccessful.

“You don’t have anything to apologize for Wieke. I’m the one who fucked it all up. I’m so sorry.” Aggie sniffed.

Wieke shifted, she pulled Aggie around to look at her and carefully took over wiping her tears much more softly than Aggie’s scrubbing.

The look on Wieke’s face nearly broke Aggie’s heart again.

“Aggie, you didn’t deserve the way you were treated.” Wieke told her evenly.

Aggie’s mouth trembled, “I hurt you, of course I deserved them being protective of you.”

Wieke cocked her head, “Aggie, you think because I misunderstood and was hurt that means I wanted you to hurt too?”

Aggie’s breathing was stuttering then, she was overwhelmed, and unprepared for this conversation, but Wieke was still wiping her tears with soft fingers, still in her space. She’d missed her so much.

“It killed me to find out I’d hurt you.” She hiccupped, unable to tell anything but the painful truth to the soft grey blue eyes requiring her attention. “I knew…I always knew that you were too good for me. Too wholesome, soft, loving, caring. Anyone of the team, any of the teams, would have protected you from me at any moment. I never could have been good enough for you. I deserved them being so protective.”

Wieke closed her eyes, her heart clenched to hear that. She knew she was adored by her national team, their Chelsea team, so many had put a protective and caring arm around her. Lucy and Keira would literally tuck her in bed between them when she cried because they loved her so much. She’d sprained her ankle, and Viv drove three hours from Manchester just to check on her. But to hear Aggie say that she’d never be enough for her, that hurt, and it was untrue.

“Aggie, that’s just not true. Yeah, it hurt at the afterparty, but I knew you wouldn’t remember it the next morning. It was just a reminder to me that you’re a bit more relaxed about those kinds of interactions than I wanted and I’d never communicated that, so I couldn’t be mad at you. I mean, I was hurt, but I never wanted us to be sitting here so many months later just now dealing with it. You are good, Aggie. Period. You are kind. You are funny. You…I hate that you feel less than, of course you’re good.”

A sob ripped its way out of Aggie’s chest then. She tried to stuff her fist in her mouth to tamp it down and failed miserably. Wieke pulled her by the arms, down into her hold. She tucked her under her chin on her chest, rubbing her hand up her side soothingly as she sobbed. She murmured softly in Dutch, Aggie had no idea what she was saying, but her tone was soft and caring.