Chapter Text
Touya loved romantic movies, which was something ridiculous he would never admit to anyone. He didn't want people to think he was like those stupid girls who dreamed of Prince Charming on a white horse with a perfect smile—although the image was strangely appealing, if he was honest.
So Touya was definitely not telling this to anyone, and he wasn't kidding when he said he loved romantic movies. He had a whole collection hidden under his bed. He suspected his mother knew about it, but she never said anything, and Touya was relieved about that.
And his favorite movies were about soulmates. Touya thought it was the height of romanticism, especially the movies from the pre-quirks era. They were so fantastical that they made him laugh for hours. He liked the idea of a simple, humble protagonist having someone very powerful, strong, and amazing as their soulmate. It was so unimaginable and idealistic that he loved it.
Watching so many movies like that made him create many expectations that he knew he shouldn't, but Touya was looking forward to the day he would find out who his soul mate was, who would love him unconditionally and treat him like a prince. He had been dreaming about it since he was five years old.
Although he wasn't that stupid. He knew that in real life things didn't work that way. He had seen many stories on the internet about people who had horrible soulmates, and he didn't think he was special enough to be so lucky, but it wasn't a crime to dream, right?
He wanted someone to finally look at him for more than two seconds, even with all his flaws and problems, and just smile. And the one thing Touya wanted more than anything else was to finally find his soul mate. The only person who had an obligation to love him unconditionally. It was destiny.
But Touya knew that predestined couples didn't always stay together, and that saddened him. He saw it every day at home; his parents weren't soulmates. When he was younger, his mother told him that her soulmate had been her best friend from childhood, but they didn't stay together because she had to marry Enji, and little Touya was very sad when he heard that.
In his childish mind, everyone should be with their perfect match, and his mother just laughed bitterly.
Touya's birthday was approaching, and he could be found jumping around the house with excitement, or constantly inspecting his body for any signs of a soul mark. At the age of ten, a name would finally be scribbled on his skin, and Touya was so happy.
Even if he wilted when his father gave him a reproachful look and went back to ignoring him again. Touya thought there wasn't a single soul alive on the planet who marveled at the idea of a person destined to love him, but apparently Enji rejected the idea.
Touya didn't know who his father's soul mate was, he had never seen any mark on his body, and Touya suspected that he didn't have one, which was very sad, because everyone deserved a soul mate, even if his father wasn't exactly the best person in the world. Touya still wanted him to be happy.
But it was also scary to think that Enji didn't have a soul mate, which meant it was possible that he didn't have one either, and he didn't want that; he wanted a soul mate.
When Touya tried to talk to Enji about it, his father was harsh and practically growled at Touya not to talk about it in front of him anymore, with such disdain and contempt that it left him perplexed. His father didn't even seem concerned about it, which was unthinkable to Touya. Soulmates were the most important thing to everyone, although apparently not to Enji.
Enji had always been more focused on being a hero than anything else, so Touya quickly realized that he didn't care about soul bonds; he cared about surpassing All Might, and that was it.
So Touya reluctantly tried to put it aside. When he finally earned his mark, he would worry about it then. His focus became training and getting stronger to at least live up to his father's expectations, although it was difficult because as he grew older, his quirk seemed like a total failure, and every time he burned himself, Touya felt his heart ache at the look of disappointment and anger in his father's eyes.
He didn't want to disappoint him; he wanted to be the hero Enji wanted him to be. Touya wanted to surpass All Might and make Enji happy. No matter how painful and exhausting it was, he kept training and getting hurt; he couldn't give up.
And in the end, after Touya burned himself so many times that he started to get used to it, all Touya got for his efforts was an angry and disappointed look from Enji, and on the worst days, Enji would grab him aggressively and yell at him to stop, with explosive anger.
Touya couldn't understand it. His father wanted the number one podium, but didn't want him to train? Touya knew he could do it, so why couldn't Enji see that? It hurt so much.
He had so many questions swirling around in his mind, making him even more distressed and distressed. Although they all dissipated when his mother continued to give him siblings. First Fuyumi, an annoying girl who wouldn't shut up, and then Natsuo, he thought his brother probably hit his head at some point because there must be something wrong with him.
And Touya finally understood, his father was trying to find a masterpiece, since he was a failure, and his brothers were flawed too, and that infuriated Touya. They were all broken objects to Enji—useless and replaceable.
He continued training, even after his father's orders. Touya simply couldn't stop, even with all the burns and pain. Touya wanted to prove to Enji that he wasn't a failure, that he could be a hero, but the last straw was when Shoto was born. The masterpiece.
Touya felt like he could explode with rage looking at the euphoria and happiness on Enji's face as he looked at the baby with the quirk he wanted. His father seemed to have found his reason for living again, and he didn't even deign to look at Touya for days after Shoto's birth.
Little Touya could feel himself reaching breaking point, and he finally snapped when Enji told him for what felt like the thousandth time to forget about being a hero, that he couldn't be a hero.
Touya had never felt so angry, and he was going to show his father, so he just reacted wildly by attacking Shoto. He should be the one making Enji happy, he should be Enji's masterpiece, not that damn baby, Enji should be looking at him.
And a murderous rage ran through him, so hot and visceral, as if something had possessed him — something he couldn't even comprehend at his tender age and didn't even think about when he attacked Shoto.
Although Touya hadn't gone very far, Enji stopped him, and that day he truly felt Enji's fury—brutal, burning. He thought he would never forget the look of pure disgust and hatred in those blue eyes that once looked at him with such pride and love, let alone how Enji screamed furiously and hit him without caring who he was hitting.
Touya cried himself to sleep that night, until his eyes were dry and his head hurt. All he wanted was for Enji to look at him again and love him. Maybe he didn't even deserve that, he thought.
After that day, he never tried anything so stupid again, not that Touya could anyway since Enji moved the damn baby to the other side of the room, leaving him no access to it. He focused on training, completely ignoring Enji's warnings.
—
Touya whimpered when he felt another twinge of pain in his hands.
Stupid Quirk. Why couldn't it just work? Touya was frustrated, he was tired of it already, and he sat in the dojo, running his hands over the burns on his arms. He'd be lucky if he could hide this, he thought, frowning.
Enji would be absolutely furious if he found out that he was still training, and the last thing Touya wanted was to feel his father's wrath come down on him again.
However, his thoughts were interrupted by a growing tingling sensation in his left wrist. Touya looked down curiously. It was a warm feeling, and it didn't bother him because he was already used to it, the slightly strong, tingling heat that spread through his wrist.
His eyes widened, practically popping out of their sockets as a name began to be engraved on his skin, deeply and clearly.
Touya held his breath, his heart nearly stopping in panic when he realized that the letters were forming a name that shouldn't be on his skin.
This couldn't be happening, it had to be a bad joke, he thought desperately. And he felt his breathing quicken, and he screamed in shock when his father's name was fully engraved on his skin.
Todoroki. Enji.
Enji Todoroki was his soulmate. The realization of this caused him to panic, his heart was racing like a roller coaster, and his breathing was so rapid that he couldn't breathe properly.
This couldn't be true, how could this be possible? His father was his soulmate, Touya didn't even know how the hell this was possible. He had never heard of relatives having soul bonds.
He felt his eyes burning as he stared at the soul mark as if it were a curse. Shouldn't soulmates love and care for you? He couldn't understand how fate could be so cruel and make his father his predestined partner.
He didn't even notice the tears running down his cheeks, wetting his shirt. It wasn't fair, Touya deserved to be loved, didn't he? He wasn't that bad, he never hurt anyone—at least not effectively. And Touya didn't even know how Enji would react to this, even though his father clearly didn't care about soul bonds, and the thought made more tears fall from his eyes like a waterfall.
Touya was so focused on the ornate mark on his wrist that he jumped when the dojo door was violently thrown open, and his eyes shot up in alarm, immediately bringing his wrist to his chest to hide it as he looked up at his clearly furious father.
“Touya!” Enji shouted, making no effort to hide his anger. The large, burly man stomped in, his eyes practically shooting daggers at the boy.
Touya swallowed hard, feeling his throat tighten in panic. He was in trouble. Not now, this couldn't get any worse.
“What did I tell you? Do you have a problem? You can't train, give up this madness!” Enji growled, glaring at him as he approached Touya sitting on the floor.
Touya instinctively cringed. He honestly couldn't care less about any of this right now, not when he had a huge problem stuck in his wrist. “I... I'm sorry,” he stammered shakily, staring at the floor and holding his wrist tightly against his chest.
He heard Enji's breathing become heavy, as if he were boiling with rage. Touya didn't look up; he didn't need to look at Enji to know that he was very angry.
“Why were you crying?” Enji asked in a tone that showed he was losing patience, and when he didn't answer, Enji spoke again in a raised voice—a warning. “Touya.”
Touya bit his lip, he didn't want to say anything about it, he could literally crawl into a hole right now and hide forever, but Touya knew that if he didn't start talking, things would get ugly for him.
“Uh, my mark...” He began in an almost inaudible tone, he didn't even want to imagine Enji's reaction when he found out, and he finally looked at Enji, who just raised his eyebrows, and Touya's expression was almost miserable when he spoke again. “It appeared.”
Enji just stared at him, his expression showing no emotion, he didn't seem interested at all, and he then sighed irritably, and he bent down in front of Touya, before demanding bluntly. “Give me your arm, I want to see.”
For a moment, Touya just remained motionless, that was the last thing he wanted to do. He swallowed hard, nothing good ever came from refusing to obey Enji, and so he slowly lowered his arm as if the action hurt, and Enji immediately grabbed it unceremoniously, pulling his arm so he could locate the mark.
His breath caught when Enji's eyes widened and the color drained from his face, looking immediately sick, as if he were about to vomit. He felt Enji's hand squeezing his arm hard enough to leave bruises, and he whimpered in pain, trying unsuccessfully to pull his arm away.
“Let go of me!” Touya exclaimed, glaring at Enji. Why was he hurting him now? He hadn't done anything wrong, it wasn't like he had asked for it, and his heart ached as Enji's expression shifted between disbelief and revulsion.
“Touya.” Enji began in a low murmur, so low that he had to strain to hear it. He seemed so shaken that Touya blinked a few times, not understanding why he looked so frightened. “Listen to me, no one can know about this, okay?” Enji said in a strangely tense tone, finally fixing his eyes on him.
Touya frowned slightly as he became more confused and frightened. Why couldn't anyone know this? People always ran around telling everyone about their soulmates. “Why not?” he asked hesitantly, tilting his head to the side.
Enji just stared at him silently, he seemed to be struggling internally for a few moments, before looking back at his wrist, tracing the letters of his name with the tip of his thumb before digging his fingernail painfully into the delicate skin and Touya groaned at the sudden pain, trying to pull away from Enji again.
“This isn't a request, it's an order. You can't tell anyone about this, do you understand me?” Enji spat the words out venomously, he looked so disgusted and it hurt Touya's heart. Was Touya so bad that Enji didn't want him as his soulmate? And he felt his eyes burning again, because this wasn't fair.
“But Dad, you're my—” Touya began in a tearful tone, and he felt the grip on his arm tighten painfully, until he saw flames beginning to burst from Enji's hands, and his eyes widened. “What?” He asked confusedly, looking at his father, his expression twisted into a grimace.
“Don't say that again.” Enji growled sickly, and then he felt Enji's hand moving with the flame flickering and then landing on his wrist, he felt his stomach churn with the sudden menacing heat, he was afraid.
He screamed at the sudden excruciating pain that covered his wrist as he felt the flames burn his skin over the mark, erasing it. It hurt, it hurt like being in hell. Touya continued to scream, tears streaming down his face as his father burned his wrist, corroding his mark with burning fire, the part of him that was technically very valuable.
When Enji finally let go, his trembling body collapsed against the dojo floor, his mind numb with agonizing pain, his body convulsing as nauseating pain shot through him before he felt bile rising in his throat, and Touya turned to the side to vomit the contents of his stomach as more tears streamed down his face, burning his eyes.
He couldn't think, the only thing that crossed his mind was that now he didn't have a soul mark, his father had made sure of that.
Touya heard his father getting up, while he was gasping and whimpering in pain, he didn't look up as he continued to cry, this was horrible, he couldn't believe it, his father had really erased his mark. Did he really dislike him that much?
“Forget that stupid thing, it doesn't mean anything, and don't you dare tell anyone.” Enji practically shouted, and he cowered against the dojo floor, unable to stop the tears from falling, and when he didn't answer, Touya felt his father grab his hair tightly, forcing him to look at him as he growled. “Did you hear me?”
“Yes, yes... I won't tell anyone.” He stammered with a trembling voice, stumbling over his words, his throat feeling like sandpaper from all the screaming.
“Good.” Enji muttered, letting go of him again, and he fell like a rag doll to the floor as the flood of tears continued, and he heard Enji sneer. “Stop crying, you're acting like a little girl.”
That was enough for him to try to swallow his tears. It was nothing, everything was fine, he told himself as he sniffed, sitting back down on the floor. Touya didn't need to be so dramatic, everything was fine, even though he felt his heart being torn apart in his chest.
“I'll get some medicine and bandage it up, stay here,” Enji said indifferently as he turned away without giving him a second glance.
It hurt like never before. Maybe it was the combination of the pain in his wrist and the emotional pain of losing his mark, but Enji's indifference was like a stab in his heart, and he pulled his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them, being careful with his injured wrist.
Touya lowered his head as he felt more tears streaming down his eyes, he didn't even know how he still had tears to shed. It shouldn't be like this, he wasn't that bad, was he? Did he really deserve this? Did he deserve to be hurt and wounded by his own soul mate? Enji clearly hated him, it was the only explanation, because how could he do this to him and act like it was nothing?
Perhaps in the end, Touya really was a failure, a useless and worthless thing, hated by his father, someone who should love him, protect him, and care for him. He could feel his ears ringing, and he was spiraling into distressing and self-deprecating feelings.
Normally, Touya wouldn't give a damn about Enji's behavior, but now it was different. The new realization that he didn't even deserve a soul mate, like everyone else had, was leading him to an emotional breakdown.
Touya didn't hear Enji come in, his mind was too clouded with distressing thoughts to pay attention. He didn't even look up when Enji knelt down in front of him and pulled his arm, he watched expressionlessly as his father cleaned the wound and bandaged it with surprising gentleness.
It was completely opposite to the situation, it made Touya want to scream about the injustice of the situation, but he said nothing, he remained silent, he honestly didn't even think he could say anything now.
“All right, just be careful.” Enji finally opened his mouth, murmuring the words in a neutral tone, and then placed some pills in his hand, probably painkillers. “Take one every six hours, you'll feel better.”
As soon as Enji finished, he stood up, looking at his son for a moment as if he were thinking about something, but then gave up on the line of reasoning and walked away bluntly, heading toward the dojo exit.
Touya didn't think much about it, the words just came out of his mouth before he could stop himself.
“Do you hate me?”
Enji hesitated before leaving the room, he remained motionless at the door, and Touya felt apprehension wash over him, he honestly didn't want to hear that. Touya didn't need to hear what he already knew, it would be like a final stab at his wounded heart, he didn't even know why he had asked that.
“No, I don't hate you.” Enji replied simply, the words sounding as if it hurt to admit it, and then he just opened the door and left the dojo, leaving a surprised and speechless Touya behind.
Of all the things he could have imagined hearing, this was definitely the last, there was a part of him that refused to believe it, while another part was feeling relieved.
This was pathetic.