Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Grabbing the bucket of cleaning solution you make your way over to a table that was recently vacated by a sweet family of 4. Carefully you place the bucket down and proceed to roll up the sleeves of your black sweatshirt. The table isn’t overly messy but regardless you begin to stack plates and bowls together.

When you originally moved back to Korea from your home in the States, you really didn’t have much of a choice in what type of job you’d get. Whatever job you could find was a good one to have and really, you don’t mind working here. The pay is decent and you actually enjoy your co workers who are very patient and helpful to you especially for translating if needed. You were born in Korea but you left when you were 5. It was shortly after your mom died from Leukemia and your dad couldn’t bear to stay here without her. Sometimes you’re happy it happened while you were young. You don’t have many memories about how awful it was for her. You do remember little things though, like how she wasn’t as active with you as she used to be. She always seemed sad too. You know she tried to fake it around you, pretend like things were fine when they definitely weren’t. Vividly you remember the last time you saw her, your dad had taken you to the hospital for your daily visit and she was acting weird. She just kept saying how much she loved you and how she was so sorry. At the time you didn’t understand what she was apologizing about, but now you know… she was apologizing for leaving you. She passed two hours later while holding you in her arms. That was your first time watching someone you loved die, you wish you could say it was the last.

At her funeral your father gave you a letter she had written for you. He read it to you through teary eyes.

My Junebug,

You may not understand what has happened to me. You must be so scared. Just know that even when I am no longer with you, even when you begin to forget my voice or my laugh, I hope you never forget how deeply I loved you. I hope you can find a true love, like your father was to me. I hope you will travel and explore. I hope you live a long happy life. I love you bigger than the moon Junie.

Mama

You dream of your mom all the time. Her smile, her laugh, even the way she used to crinkle her nose at you to make you laugh. She was perfect in every way. But after she died your dad moved you across the world to the states and because of that you forgot a lot of Korean. It took you a while to understand why he needed to leave, why he uprooted your entire life and isolated you from your culture. In many ways you still resent him for it.

Once all the dishes are stacked together you carry them back to the dishwashing sink and set them gently inside. Then you make your way back to the table and begin to wash it down with a cloth. When you’re convinced the table is pristine you start on your next task, scrubbing down the dishes. The job is not glamorous at all. Cleaning up trash and washing dishes are both gross and mundane tasks but it gives you a lot of time to think. When you’ve washed the last plate, you place all the dishes back in their spots to dry.

After washing your hands, you make your way back to the front of the shop and over to the register. “G, do you need me to help with anything else for now?”

Your manager is a short and stocky woman with red hair. She’s standing behind the counter tapping away at her laptop before she turns and looks you up and down. “You’ve been here all day. Go get some rest before you fall over!” She shakes her apron in your direction shooing you out from behind the counter.

With a glance at the clock you realize she’s right. You’ve just worked 10 hours straight. “Okay okay I’ll go!” You laugh pulling off your apron and setting it down under the counter where your bag sits. You grab it and pull it over your shoulder. “Remember tomorrow I’m off so I won’t see you until Tuesday.”

G’s back to tapping away at her computer and you can only assume she’s replying to emails. She offers you a grunt of understanding. “Yes, enjoy your time off. Don’t get into trouble.”

“You know me, boring boring boring.” You shoot her a smile and a wave before dashing out the door.

It’s rare that you ever get a day off but today is your roommates birthday and you promised you’d spend the night out with her. Preemptively you know you’re a light weight when it comes to drinking, so you figured why not clear one day off your schedule so that you really can enjoy yourself. As you head to the bus station two streets over you pull out your phone and send over a text.

3:22pm You
I just got out of work and I’m on my way to you!

3:24pm Lia
Yessssss!!! Okay I have our outfits steamed so all we have to do when you get here is get ready!

3:41pm You
Bus just got here see you soon

You slip your phone into your back pocket and step onto the bus finding a seat in the middle section sitting opposite a hunched old lady. After slipping on your headphones, you stare out the window watching the buildings pass by.

In no time you’re arriving outside your apartment building. Each time you walk in you are always a little surprised at how lucky you were to find this place or really how lucky you were to meet Lia at the airport when you first arrived to Korea.

You had just made it through customs and made your way over to the information desk to ask for directions to the nearest bus station when you overheard Lia having a very animated conversation with some guy. In general you don’t necessarily consider yourself nosey but with how loud they were it would’ve taken a lot of effort for you to ignore them. By the time they finished their argument and the man stalked away deeper into the airport, Lia had broken down in tears. In most situations you’d have just minded your business and went about your day but something inside of you knew you had to go comfort her. You made your way to her and asked her if there was anything you could do. She laughed and told you “unless you are looking to rent an extra bedroom in my apartment I don’t think so.” And when you told her you absolutely were interested in that, you two became fast friends. You’ve always been very confident in your ability to read people and for all you knew about this girl sniffling in front of you, she was going to be someone you could trust.

She helped you with your bags and told you the whole story of how that guy was her ex and how he had been cheating on her with some girl in Europe. She found out that he was planning a secret trip to go visit her and she told him to go and never come back. Then she told you how she needed someone to help with his part of her lease and how she believed you must’ve been an angel for being the perfect answer to the problem.

The apartment itself is in the perfect location where you can walk to most stores and restaurants but still far enough away that you don’t get the bulk of tourists hanging around. Once you enter the apartment and slip off your shoes you call out for Lia and find her in her bathroom starting on her makeup.

“How was work sweetie?” She says giving you a bright smile. Lia is someone that is undeniably gorgeous. Her perfect skin without any blemishes and big beautiful brown eyes. Her black hair freshly cut right to her shoulders. You are both the same height at 5ft2in but she has a much fuller figure than you do.

With a groan you walk over to her shower turning it on to the temperature you like. “It was weirdly uneventful today.” You start to shrug off your clothes and hop in.

Lia is easily the closest friend you’ve ever had and really, you see her as the sister you always needed. You rarely have any boundaries on most things and no conversation is off the table.

“Well good that means you will have plenty of energy for tonight!” She does an excited squeak and you laugh.

A while later you are both dressed and ready for your night out. You’ve been planning this with her for almost a month so you have a whole itinerary ready. Before you head out the door you both stand in front of the mirror for some pictures. Lia is in a short cheetah print dress with gold trimming. She has black boots on and her hair done in curls that loosely graze her shoulders. She’s the epitome of beauty tonight.

You don’t typically dress up very often and that’s partially because you don’t really go out and also you don’t own many cute outfits anyway. Lia let you borrow one of her dresses and while it doesn’t fit you in the most flattering way, it’s definitely better than nothing. You’re wearing a dark blue mini dress with a corseted bodice which helps a lot because you can tighten it properly to your body shape. You decided on an updo for your hair hoping that it will stay in place with all the dancing you will inevitably be doing. You’re also rocking black boots as well but yours have a little extra heel to them making your legs look much longer.

As soon as you are both satisfied with the pictures you are headed out the door to your first stop.

The evening passes in a blur of drinks and dancing. By the time you make it to the last club of the night you are both starting to feel foggy. In response, you decide to be mature and lay off the drinks.

You’re at the bar grabbing a water for yourself when you feel the heat of someone’s gaze on you. Nervously you glance around and notice a man at the end of the bar staring you down. Quickly you look away hoping he didn’t notice you. The club is pretty full tonight so it’s entirely possible you’re just mistaken. You smile at the bartender as he hands you the glasses and you shuffle over to the back side of the club near the emergency exit where Lia has taken over the dance floor. “Lia drink up.”

With a cheeky smile she grabs the water and downs it quickly. Then immediately she makes her way back to her current dance partner, Kiho. He is one of her classmates who just so happened to be at the last bar you visited an hour ago. You don’t mind that he’s tagging along now, really he’s so funny and Lia has been good friends with him for years. It’s just the fact that you are starting to feel a bit like a third wheel as they dance around the room.

With a huff, you drink a sip of your water and walk over to a nearby table to rest for a bit. Just as you are about to slide into the chair, you feel someone forcefully grab your wrist and you yelp. “What the f-“ You lose your words as you’re whirled around, eye to eye with the man from the bar. You blink a few times staring at him, confused. “Who are you? Let me go now.” You say with all the anger you can muster but before you can even get another word out your being pulled away to the back of the club and through the emergency exit into an alley.

At the best of times you struggle with asserting yourself and when it comes to the idea of fight, flight, or freeze you naturally turn into a deer in headlights. So while you feel the fear building in your chest, your brain is blank on how to fix this situation. You feel paralyzed as he shoves through the door and the cool night air hits your face. Goosebumps prickle over your skin bringing you out of your frozen state and into reality. Then you’re clawing at the man’s hand, words getting caught in the back of your throat, tears burning in the corners of your eyes. “P-please let me-“ He pushes up against the brick wall a hand over your mouth.

Now the tears are really pouring and your mind is going a thousand miles a minute wondering what he’s going to do with you. Your eyes dart around looking for something to grab onto or someone who may see this happening. The alley behind the club is empty besides a large waste bin and a few scattered pieces of trash. Further down, you notice a single door leading to a what you assume must be some restaurant. That door is slightly ajar and you can hear noise coming from inside but with the distance you know they won’t hear you, even if you were to get a chance to scream. Finally your eyes make their way back to the man in front of you. He’s older, and much larger than you. He’s breathing hard, a gravely sound and you can see the sheen of sweat across his forehead and upper lip. You start to think maybe if you can just remove yourself from his tight grip you could run fast enough to get away.

The man keeps one hand over your mouth pushing your head into the wall, the other hand still gripping your wrist. He smells foul and as he notices you watches him he gives you a terrifying smile that shows off his disgusting teeth and rotting breath. “I’m going to remove my hand from your mouth…” His hand pushes your head harder into the wall. The pressure makes you feel like you’re a balloon ready to pop and black dots spiral in your vision. “If you scream, I will kill you.”

He continues to push you harder until you are sure that this man is completely capable of breaking your skull. But to your surprise, he does as he promised. He removes his hand from your face and gently, you move your jaw around. He gives another smile. “Good girl.” He says. You’re breathing heavily through gasps of air. Your tears are streaming down your cheeks and your free hand, the one he isn’t gripping and cutting the circulation off of, is digging nails into your palm. A nervous habit you’ve had since childhood. Sometimes, when your anxiety is at its peak, you’ll dig so hard that you draw blood.

While you’re struggling to control your breathing, he’s started to dig around in his pocket for something and for a moment it takes his attention away from you. Glancing around again this time with a little more range of movement, you look out towards the road a decent distance away. At this time of night you don’t see anyone walking around but you wonder, maybe if you do chance screaming, just maybe someone would hear.

The man pulls out something that looks like tape and you realize you this is your last chance. You have to make a decision now. And so you do. You scream.

Chapter Text

You feel the scream echo off the walls around you as the man’s eyes go wide, then they zero in on you in anger. “Bitch.” He spits out. Then he slaps the tape onto your mouth and pushes you to the ground.

On impact your head collides with the brick wall of the club and you feel momentarily stunned by the pain of it, but with adrenaline pumping through you, you allow one calming breath before you’re scrambling away from your attacker. You were right before, he is wildly slower than you so you’re able to dodge his grasps and make your way towards the street. It feels like an eternity before you make any headway but still you decide to take a chance by turning and checking over your shoulder to see if the man is following behind you.

Your heart hammers in your chest as you see him there. He hasn’t followed, which should be a reason for relief, but he’s wearing a smile that sends fear to your heart and gives you all the more reason to push harder as you run. Something in that smile tells you, he’s not done with you, even if you have escaped him.

He shouts towards you then, its faint at this distance but with the quiet night surrounding you, its clear as day. “Run Junie, but I will find you.” Terror seizes your mind as another scream leaves your lips. With one more glance over your shoulder you realize he’s no longer there in the alleyway. Before you have the chance to freak out over his disappearance you run smack into what feels like another brick wall but this time it’s warm and wraps its arms around you. At least that’s what you think as the adrenaline escapes you and the pain in your head reaches a climax. You pass out.

————————

Beep. Beep. Beep.

When you come to, you’re mentally aware of what’s happening long before you open your eyes. The sharp stabbing pain on the back of your head is the most obvious sign that something is wrong. There’s something attached to your arm restricting your movement and you're laying down on a hard and uncomfortable bed. One blink, then another, and you notice you’re in a hospital room which feels strange as the last thing you remember is dancing with Lia at the club.

Oh shit, Lia. You’re about to sit up in the bed, when the stabbing pain intensifies and tears spring to your eyes.
“Fuck..” you moan out through clenched teeth. You’ve always been so sensitive to all types of pain, having had your fair share of injuries. However there's something about this pain that causes you to descend into a panic. Your breathing increases rapidly, and your eyesight goes blurry. You shut them tightly and think hard about something to calm you. The first thing that comes to your mind is your moms voice. She would always sing to you when you were scared or hurt. You think of her singing her favorite song to you I Cant Help Falling In Love. One deep breath, then another.

Just as quickly as the panic began, you now feel a sense of calm only your mother’s memory can bring. There's a rustle of movement to the left of you and quickly, a man comes into your field of vision. Your body is seconds away from descending into yet another panic attack because you’ve never seen this man in your life. His face is sweet but etched with concern. He has full pink lips and dimples placed perfectly on his cheeks. Something about the way he looks at you is surprisingly soothing. The man gives you a kind smile that brings crinkles to the corner of his eyes. Maybe he notices the questions that you’re just about to bring to your lips because he shakes his head earnestly.
“No no, don’t speak. I don’t want you to be in any pain. Um.. honestly I know this is terrifying. You were pretty out of it on the ride here.” His smile falters some and the concern has creeped back into his gaze. “Well firstly my name is Chan. I was there after you collapsed. And I really didn’t want to leave you alone so…” His words trail off as he reads the expression on your face.

Your eyes have grown wide and you whisper, “collapsed?” It’s a strained gravely sound and you’re not sure if he even understood you. As if you weren’t already confused out of your mind before, you have no recollection of this man or how you got here. There's another stabbing pain in your head that causes you to wince.

Chan pulls a chair over and sits down beside you. “Well I’m not super sure on all the details of what happened before I saw you. I heard a scream and then when I walked around the corner you ran right into me and passed out. I had my friend call the ambulance and..” he motions around the room. “Here we are now.”

You glance around once more struggling not to move your head too much. “I don’t… I really don’t remember.” You slowly reach your hand up to the spot on your head and press gently on the bandage there. “Where’s Lia?” You groan again because the energy it takes to speak is starting to weigh on you. “My phone..”

Chan looks around and grabs your phone off of the table beside your bed. As you raise it up to your eyes with another groan at the brightness , you see 15 new notifications, all from Lia. “Shit.. oh sorry.” You say to Chan. You realize it’s not very polite to curse so frequently but there’s a part of you that really doesn’t care about that at the moment. You swipe up on your phone and see 6 missed calls and 9 texts.

10:22pm Lia
Did you leave? I’m looking for you…

10:26pm Lia
???????

10:31pm Lia
Seriously where did you go?

10:57pm Lia
I’m freaking out HELLO?

11:01pm Lia
Someone said a girl got taken in an ambulance

11:01pm Lia
Please… I’m so worried

11:03pm Lia
They cleared out the club. I’m calling a taxi

11:37pm Lia
Where are you? I’m home. CALL BACK!

11:41pm Lia
😓

12:04am You
I’m so sorry. I am at the hospital. Don’t freak out.

You don’t expect a text or call immediately but just as you’re about to set your phone back down on the side table it lights up with her picture. You quickly pull the phone to your ear wincing in pain.

“Hel-“

“What the fuck happened?? I’m getting dressed I’m on my way to you, are you okay? Babe what’s going on?” You can almost feel the anxiety rushing through you again. Her voice is loud and it’s causing your head to throb so harshly that you feel nauseous. Chan must see this on your face because he grabs the phone from you and brings it up to his ear.

“Um hello,” he says looking slightly embarrassed. “I am with your friend and-“

Even though you can’t hear Lia on the other line you definitely know that she’s screaming at him right now, probably demanding that she can speak to you.

“Hey okay, I get it you’re upset just listen, she has a concussion but she’s healthy and safe here.” He pauses as Lia responds sounding much calmer now. “She is asking if you want her to come to you?”

You ponder that for a second but ultimately decide that she would probably make a huge deal out of this situation and honestly you just want to go back to sleep.

Chan gets the message and explains to Lia that you are going to call her back in the morning. After that Lia seems happy enough because she hangs up and Chan sets the phone back on the table. “Sorry I don’t mean to be overbearing. It just seemed like you needed some help.”
You smile and nod ever so slightly. “Thank you. For everything.” While you may still be very confused about how tonight’s events may have happened, one thing you are positive about is that this man must be a guardian angel to have saved you like this. And hanging around, waiting for you to wake up? He’s more kind than most people you know.

Chan shrugs and laughs softly. “It was nothing really. A pretty girl falling into my arms. Like a fairytale huh?” Your cheeks heat despite yourself. “The doctors said your concussion isn’t too serious and that you’ll probably be able to go home in the morning.” He looks you over, his eyes traveling from your head, down to your eyes, then to your wrist, which you realize feels sore and swollen.

He seems very tense in the way he's speaking and checking you over. Your eyebrows furrow as his eyes trail back up to your face and he bites his lip softly in a nervous manner. Even with the small things that you know about this man, you can tell he's not a great liar. “Tell me…” you demand, your heart starting to beat faster. “What happened to me?”
Chan blinks a few times, “I don’t want to scare you.. the nurses said not to mention anything until you’re more stable.. um.” He raises his hand up to the back of his neck, rubbing the spot anxiously. He looks as if he's contemplating something but just before you ask again, he clears his throat and says, “When you ran into me, you had tape over your mouth.” Suddenly his eyes are locked intensely onto yours and he reaches out to grab your hand.
His hands are slightly calloused but warm. A shiver runs up your spine at his words but you continue to listen. “Apparently cameras saw some man grab you and take you out of the club. Then when you were outside he.. He was pretty rough with you. You screamed and he pushed you into the wall. That’s where that happened.” He points to your head and then shakes his own angrily. “The asshole ran, when you escaped and probably good for him because if I’d known at the time…” Chan takes a long deep breath. You can feel the anger radiating off of him. Slowly you begin to rub your thumb in a circle around his palm. In all of your experience with people, and you have a lot of it, you have rarely met a man like this. For him to show so much genuine concern for some stranger is incredibly shocking to you, but you decide that must just be how he is with everyone. A protector.

“How did… who told you that?” Your voice is still very weak and your breathing is labored.

Chan is blushing as you watch him. It’s a bizarre reaction to such a simple question but you wait for his response. “Well, I hope this doesn’t upset you, they weren’t going to let me stay originally. I had to tell them that I’m your fiancée.” And now you're blushing too. “There were police officers here before you woke up and they filled me in on what they found.”

You close your eyes and sigh deeply. You feel as though there’s more to say to him about lying to the police but with the pain you’re experiencing and the way he’s cared for you, there's no reason to point that out now. Despite his explanation on what happened to you, you still don’t recall anything that he’s said. It’s not that you don’t believe him but maybe you’re still too groggy to process the terrible details. As you continue to mindlessly rub his palm, his hand tightens on yours. Your eyes find him. His blush has dissolved and he seems to be trying to gauge your reaction. “I still don't remember… but that’s probably for the best..”
Another round of stabbing pain starts in your head again. Quickly he’s slipped his hand from yours and places it on your head, the side that isn’t so painful. He begins to brush the hair from your face and his thumb grazes your forehead. With a groan you lean into the touch.

Then you hear the hospital door open and he jerks his hand away. When you look around there are two police officers and a nurse standing there. “Hello, how are you feeling?” The nurse has a sweet, sympathetic aura that brings at least a little ease to the increasingly stressful situation.
“Not great..” you mumble. Chan reclaims your hand gently and offers an encouraging smile to you.

“Hello ma’am. We were wondering if you’d be okay with answering a few questions about what happened this evening.” The first officer is a tall man with greying hair. He gives you a slight bow and a smile.

Immediately you look at Chan which takes him a little off guard. Really you’re shocked as well. You barely know this man and you’re looking to him for strength and encouragement. When the shock wears off Chan gives you a nod and you turn back to the officer. “Yes, that's fine.”

Chapter Text

When the officers leave, you finally feel exhaustion creeping in and Chan encourages you to sleep. They weren’t able to get much information from you. Everything seems to be blocked from your memory which the nurses say is normal for a serious concussion. Overall the conversation was not nearly as scary as you would have thought it to be. Even when you could tell the shorter officer was getting irritated at the lack of answers you had, Chan stepped in to remind him that you weren’t in a position to be interrogated as the victim. Ultimately you wouldn’t have been able to get through any of that without him. Your guardian angel.

When you awake again your head is significantly less painful than before. There’s still a consistent throb and sitting up makes you lightheaded, but the nausea has passed and you feel like you could at the very least move some. When you glance around you realize that Chan is nowhere to be found. A small part of you knew this would probably happen once he was sure you were okay. He exceeded any expectations you had on helping a stranger in need. However a larger part of you feels sad and alone. You realize, looking at the seat he had occupied for the last few hours, that you miss him. You shake your head shocked by the realization.

To get your mind off of it, you reach and grab your phone. There’s only one notification and it's a text from Lia.

6:12am Lia
Hey… I know you’re probably resting. The guy told me that you just wanted to feel a little better before I come visit. Please let me know… I’m worried.

The time now is a little past 7am so you imagine she may have fallen back asleep, and decide to reply to her later. With a huff you kick your legs out over the side of the bed. You need a second to catch yourself but when you feel more confident you slide down and onto your feet. It’s not as bad as you imagined it would be to stand, but you can absolutely feel the throb of where your head hit the brick wall. Slowly you shuffle to the bathroom and turn on the shower head to begin warming the water. It takes a few moments for you to strip down, taking extra care not to move too quickly. But once you do, you slide into the shower and wash yourself down.

It’s relaxing and you feel so much better after it’s over. Your head does ache more once you’re done, being upright for this long is taking its toll. But then you dry yourself off and look around. Of course…you remember, you don’t actually have any clothes here and there’s not a clean gown in the bathroom with you. You let out a groan of frustration and wrap the flimsy hospital towel tightly around your body. Naturally you are smaller in stature but even this towel doesn't cover you as well as you’d hope it would. After drying your hair and detangling it with your fingers you step out of the bathroom and head straight to the bed.

Just as you make it over to the nurse call button you hear a knock at the door. “Come in!” Then you spin around ready to ask the nurse for a new gown.

Except it’s not a nurse that you see. Heat rushes over your body and up to your cheeks as you lock eyes with Chan. He’s dressed in a new outfit, black skinny jeans with rips in several places, and a black band tee. He has two bags on his arms and what appears to be a coffee in his hands.
“I thought you left…” you say, shocked and confused.

He gulps, his eyes refusing to leave yours. “I.. um I went to grab a few things for you. And some hot chocolate… I thought you might… um” It takes you a few seconds to remember that you’re standing in front of this stranger in only a towel and you shriek, turning quickly away from him. The quick movement sends a sharp pain from your head down your body and you groan loudly.

Faster than you could believe possible, Chan is at your side, almost carrying you to the bed. His arms are warm and so large that you’re sure he could’ve just scooped you up and thrown you on the bed if he wanted to but you push that thought from your mind quickly. When you are sitting again, he makes extra effort to look anywhere but at your body as he heads back to the bags he dropped on the floor.

“Um this bag has some clothes you could wear, if you want. And then this one has a few snacks.” He places the bags beside you and then turns his back to you. “I live close by so I brought some stuff from home.. The nurses said you could leave this morning so I wanted to make sure you had everything you needed. I’ll step outside so you can get dressed.” And then he’s gone.

The more you spend time with this man, then the more you are struck by how genuinely kind he’s been to you. Bringing you things from his home? Staying with you all night? Angel.

You riffle through the bag he brought you and pull out a t shirt with the letters SKZ on it and then a pair of biker shorts. You raise your eyebrows at this because why would he have bikers shorts at his home. Especially ones that were extra small. That’s when you notice that tag on them and in the bottom of the bag next to a pack of socks and undergarments, you see a receipt dated for this morning. You breathe out a confused sigh. Maybe he just feels really bad for you? Or maybe he’s just a really forward person. Either way, you decide that you will pay him back for everything he’s done for you.

————————-

Chan gives you a good amount of time to get ready and then he knocks and waits for your reply before coming into the room. You laugh as you look up at him, hands over his eyes until you promise that you’re fully dressed. His gaze rakes down your body and back up to your eyes. “You look… great.” His smile is genuine as he takes a few steps closer and looks at the bandages on your head. At this distance you can smell his cologne. It’s fresh and mesmerizing, not too strong or bold. You also realize that he’s just tall enough to tower over you. When he’s done examining it he looks down at you and you up at him. “How do you feel, really?” The concern is back, the furrowed eyebrows and the slightly downturn to his lips.

“Better. I still don’t remember but I feel good. Promise.” This seems to help some. He takes a step back and smiles earnestly. Then the next hour passes in a whirlwind of paper work and doctor’s orders. You are to mainly stay resting as much as possible. No heavy screen use, and remember to take your pain medicine. Once all of that is squared away Chan leads you out of the hospital.
“I should probably text Lia to come pick me then.” You pull your phone out and press Lia’s contact when Chan yanks it from your hand. “Hey!”

He locks your phone and slides it in your back pocket carefully, his fingers insanely close to grazing your ass. Instead of acknowledging that you look to him incredulously. He just shrugs “I have a car, I’ll take you home but like the doc said, no screens.”

You scoff as he grabs your hand leading you to his car. “You’re joking right? You think I’m just never going to look at my phone again?” He doesn’t respond but instead you are led to the passenger seat of a sleek black car that screams luxury, at least to you, who’s used to beat up rusted vehicles. He opens the door for you and helps you inside, even going as far as to buckle you in. Then he closes the door gently and hops in the drivers seat. “Alright what’s the address?” He says looking to you.

It’s at this point that you realize, this man is a total stranger and now you’re in his car and he’s about to find out where you live. “Um… we barely know each other…”
Maybe he can see the wheels turning in your head because then he laughs deeply. “Let’s make a deal, if I can get you home safely, you’ll let me take you out once you’re feeling better, and then you can really get to know me.” His eyes are intense as they lock on yours but not in an intimidating way, it’s more hopeful.

As if this man hasn’t proven his trustworthiness at this point. Over and over again. A smile slowly creeps up your face and you nod. “Deal.”

When he drops you off at your apartment building, you have to swear to him that you can make it inside and to your place safely. He grits his teeth and sighs. “Fine… but here,” he gives you his phone. “Put your number in. I’ll text you so you have my number too. And you better let me know once you get settled.” He’s demanding, you realize. Maybe he’s used to getting what he wants or maybe he’s just genuinely concerned. You can’t exactly put your finger on it but you believe it’s a mixture of the two. Once you exchange numbers he seems much calmer about leaving you.

“Oh!” You say before he drives off. “I’ll send you back the money you spent on the clothes.” His face scrunches in confusion and you point to the shorts and socks. “You know I saw the receipt.”

His laugh hits you like a truck. It’s hearty and sweet, and his head rocks back into the headrest on his seat. “No no no. That’s no problem at all. Consider it a gift.” And then without any other words, he drives off leaving you only a little shocked.

Later, once you’re settled in your room and Lia has spent hours making sure your water bottle is filled, that you’ve eaten a good meal, and that you fill her in as much as possible on this mystery man, you finally have your room to yourself and you reach to grab your phone, which haven’t touched since you walked into the apartment.

With all the pampering from Lia and the medication you feel pretty good so the light from your phone doesn’t hurt too bad. You scroll through TikTok for a few minutes before you lose interest and then you open your messages. First, you send a text to G letting her know what happened and that you will be out for a few more days on doctor’s orders.

Next, you send a text to your friend Min-jun letting him know that you won’t be able to help him study for his final tomorrow. Finally, you’re about to put your phone down and turn over to go to sleep when it starts to buzz with a phone call. You don’t check the name assuming it must be Min-jun.

“Hey love, I wouldn’t worry to-“ You’re cut off by a huff and a voice very different from Min.

“Love? Do you call all the strange boys that?” You can practically hear the smirk on his mouth. “You never texted me once you got settled.” His voice isn’t necessarily angry. But you it is strained and short, different from how you remember his voice before.

You pause, collect yourself and say in the sweetest voice you can muster. “I’m so sorry Chan.” He’s silent so you continue. “I made it back fine, Lia was very adamant about making sure I filled her in on everything and then she stuffed me with food and I’m just now getting to bed.”
The silence continues, making you feel awkward. You squirm some in your bed. Finally he says, “How’s your pain?”

With a soft sigh of relief you let him know how you’re feeling. He asks a lot of questions mainly centered about how much you’ve been able to rest since getting home and if you need anything. On the third time of his asking you cut him off. “Chris, you know you can stop right? You got me home, you saved my life. You don’t have to take care of me, I'm fine.”

You’re unsure if the noise you hear is a groan or a growl but what you can tell is that you must’ve said something wrong because the next time he speaks he sounds hurt. “I care about making sure you’re okay. I know we just met but is it so bad that I was to help you?”

“I didn’t mean.. I just don’t want to be a burden to you. Lia is great and I already bug her enough as is.” You begin to shake your knee nervously. “I just mean, you don't have to worry. I’ll text you. We can set up that date.”

“Yeah.. definitely. Have a good night.” He says, still sounding like you stabbed him in the chest. Then he hangs up.

You don’t expect to feel so guilty about how the phone call went. Unfortunately you realize that you were harsh to someone who was nothing but helpful, more so than most strangers would’ve been. Your head is starting to throb again so you grab your meds off of the side table and then relax into your bed and allow sleep to over take you.

You fall into a deep sleep and you dream of a knight, his armor shining in the sunlight. He rides his horse to you and scoops you up into his arms right before you fall off the cliff.

Chapter Text

The next days pass in a blur. You wake up, you get yourself ready, you climb back into bed and you rot… all day. You’ve been trying to fill your time with reading as much as possible to distract you from wanting to use your phone. Typically you work everyday so you don’t have a lot of free time to focus on hobbies so the last few days you’ve spent any downtime to think; About your past, about your mom.

Those thoughts always lead you down a very long and emotionally exhausting path so then you try and be productive. You’ve had enough free time to clean your apartment from top to bottom and even revive your passion for drawing which has been amazing with getting the time to pass faster. At first you draw flowers, and landscapes you wish to visit some day. Then your drawing turns darker and you’re drawing a man shrouded in darkness. When that happens you have to quickly find a way to distract yourself, so find other ways to be productive.

On the last day of your required bed rest you wake up feeling groggy and more nauseous than you have since leaving the hospital. You hadn’t slept very well at all, waking up frequently from nightmares. It’s impossible to decipher what you’re really dreaming about. You still can’t remember anything that happened the night you were attacked but you’ve run through the details that Chan told you about over and over again. A small part of you is relieved that you don’t remember but the other part of you is scared to even think about running across this dangerous man again and not even remembering what he looked like. You’ve spoken with the police a few times over the last few days and the conclusion is that the footage from the security cameras are just too blurry to make out any distinguishing features.

Sitting up slowly, you turn on your bedside lamp and pick up your phone. There’s one unread message and your heart flips when you realize Chan has texted you. You haven’t spoken since that day he dropped you off at your apartment. Part of you expected not to hear from him again after you shut down his concerns about you. But his text is pleasant enough.

8:21am Chan
Good morning. How’s recovery going?

8:32am You
Hi!! I’m feeling 99% better thank you for checking in

8:33am Chan
Anytime… Are you busy right now?

Well of course you’re not busy. He probably knows that as well but could this possibly be the date he had mentioned he would take you on?

8:36am You
I just woke up, going to make some breakfast soon.

8:36am Chan
Well before you start cooking, I’m in the area… Would you want to meet up for breakfast?

Your smile is instant. You’ve been cooped up for days with no one to talk to but Lia and she’s been busy with school and her own job so it’s been lonely. It will be so nice to get out for a little bit.

8:37am You
Definitely! I can be ready in 15

8:38am Chan
Perfect. See you soon, love

For a moment you stare at the word. It’s an oddly personal thing to call someone and sure, you’ve gotten inexplicably close with Chan, the stranger who saved your life. But you really wouldn’t call yourself more than acquaintances. You barely know the guy, and he barely knows you. In the end you decide you’re probably just reading into things and remind yourself that he is very kind so this is probably a normal way to address people.

Giving one good stretch and a groan, you waddle over to the closet and pull out a comfy casual sweatsuit. It’s a dark grey with the nike logo across the front and on the side of the pants. Once you’re dressed you head into the bathroom. Starting first on your teeth, then your makeup. You slip your glasses onto your face instead of wearing your contacts which have bothered you endlessly since your concussion. Then you focus on your hair which is a mess from the night before. After detangling and straightening your bangs you decide on a loose curl. When you’re done you turn off the light and step into the living room.

Lia is already out for the day meeting up with her boyfriend to study. She told you she would be back for dinner and as always she left a little note for you on the counter reminding you to take your medicine and to drink water.
Growing up you didn’t have many people around who cared very much about you. After your mom died, your dad just gave up. He tried for a while to put on a show that he was okay, but even at a young age you’d have to take care of him. You would remind him to eat, you kept your apartment tidy, and even ensured that he actually got up with his alarm each morning to get to work. He was the shell of the man you’d known when your mom was alive. Years later when you’d graduated and he didn’t show up at your graduation, you knew somehow deep down that something was incredibly wrong.

When you’d gotten home after your celebration and found his body hanging in his room… you weren’t shocked. You didn’t grieve. You just existed as you had before. The people you love always leave you.

Now you have Lia though and as much as you hadn’t wanted to get too close to anyone else with the fear of losing them too, she’s been a sister to you. Always thoughtful in a way that makes you feel seen. So when she writes you these notes, you keep every single one in a little jar in your room.

As you get to the front door you slip on your shoes, give yourself a check in the mirror and then you are headed out of your apartment building to find Chan.

————————

When you step out into the fresh air you have to take a second to adjust. It’s been 3 days since you’ve been outside and you didn’t realize before just how much that had been effecting you mentally. Now that you’re out in the open air you feel light as a feather and genuinely happy. The smile that spreads across you face is big and toothy and you imagine you probably look a little crazy but you’re too consumed in your own joy to care.

So consumed, that apparently you’re totally oblivious to the man standing in front of his black car directly in front of you. When your gaze does finally meet his, your face heats with embarrassment.

Chan is wearing a long sleeve buttoned black shirt. The top few buttons hang open loosely leaving his chest partially visible as well as a chain around his neck. He’s also wearing loose fitting black jeans with wide bottoms and several chains draped down the side. He has black sunglasses and his fringe is messily layered on his forehead. He smiles at you, dimples and all and your heart jumps a little. “Good morning….” Maybe you’d imagined it but his voice is a little lower than you remember and the way he whispers sends a shiver down your spine.

He’s stepping towards you and scooping you up into his arms in the next second. His touch is gentle but you can’t help but recognize the strength there. You’re wrapping your arms around his neck forced to stand on your toes as he lifts you. “Hi Chan.” You murmur. Then you’re set back down onto the pavement and he’s checking you front top to bottom.

It’s not a sexy exchange. He checks your head where the bandages used to be, and then continues his way down. “You’re sure you’re feeling up to this?”

‘Ever so thoughtful,’ you think. “I really feel great Chan. This is exactly what I needed. Let’s goooo” You whine playfully pushing past his concerned gaze and walking to the car in front of you. You’re just about to open the door when a strong hand grips your wrist and pulls you away from the car and into Chan’s chest.

“Don’t you dare.” Chan murmurs in your ear. You whirl around and catch a glimpse of frustration that quickly dissipates into his cheeky smile so fast you think you must’ve imagined it. He leans forward, which causes you to lean as well, he's pressed so close to your back you can feel his chest rise and fall as he breathes. Then he pulls open the door for you. His head nods towards the car and you realize that’s your cue to get inside.

Chan is still standing there as you slide into the seat and shocks you when he bends again into your personal space, grabs your buckle and clicks it in. On his way sliding back out he brushes a gentle kiss to your forehead and then closes the door and walks around to the drivers side.
You’re blinking dazedly at the entire encounter before realizing that it’s not just you in the car. You whirl around at a sweet chuckle and find another man in the back seat.

Chan is back in the car now buckling himself and just pulling into the road before the newest mystery man speaks. “Oh! Sorry to scare you. I should’ve greeted you first. I’m Jeongin.” He nods his head to you, and smiles.
“Oh hello.” It’s not that you’re trying to be rude or anything but you’re confused and now feeling much more embarrassed at that whole scene with Chan moments ago.

However now you’re sure you must be just reading into his actions because there’s no way he would be so forward with you in front of his friend. You turn back to the front and stare out the window as Chan drives.

An awkwardness hangs in the air around you. Maybe you’d imagined it, but hadn’t a small part of you believed this meeting as a date? The last time you spoke with Chan after he dropped you off at the hospital, he’d said he wanted to take you out so you could get to know him. Had you read too deeply into that as well?

“Jeongin is my roommate,” Chan says. You can feel his gaze drifting over to you every few moments. “On Monday mornings we always go out to breakfast as this little hidden spot near your place so I figured bringing you along would be nice.” He’s quiet for a second and then adds. “I should’ve told you he’d be with us…”

Your head jerks over to him and you wince a bit at the pain it causes. It’s more dull and achy than the sharp pain you have had for the last few days but it’s persistent all the same.

“No no no!” You reach your hand out to him placing it on his forearm. “This is fine! The more the merrier, really.” Your smile is genuine as he looks at you. “Jeongin, how long have you both been friends?”

As you shift in your seat to better see him behind you, you realize his eyes are locked on your hand still holding onto Chan. You quickly pull it away, placing it into your lap. His eyes track their ways back to you and he shrugs. “Channie-hyung and I go way back really.”

Beside you Chan gives a sputtering laugh. “Oh yeah wayyy back.” He says sarcastically.

“We work together actually.” Jeongin smiles at you. “But he’s like a brother to me.”

Your smile is brighter at the sweet exchange. Quickly it’s ruined by Chan chucking something at Jeongin. He wails dramatically and reaches forward, towards Chan’s neck where he begins to tickle right below his ear and the car descends into chaos. They are throwing little things back and forth and Chan is reaching back to him try to grab him which Jeongin easily dodges as he slips around the back seat. And you’re just laughing heartily at the playfulness of it all. ‘Yes,’ you think, ‘definitely like brothers.’

After a short ride, you arrive in front of a building that looks pretty bare to you; the only distinguishing factor is a small sign outside. Chan announces you’ve arrived and then he's out of the car and walking to you quickly. Jeongin is fast though, hoping out and reaching your door first. He pulls it open and holds his hand out to you with a smirk on his face just as Chan makes it to his side holding his hand out as well.

You’re painfully taken aback by the beauty of these two men. If Chan has a more rugged manly beauty, Jeongin exudes boyish charm. Not necessarily childlike, but full of optimistic whimsy. He’s wearing an oversized sweatshirt and jeans with a black beanie. His face is sweet, like you know he is trustworthy and his smile consumes you.

Carefully you look between each man’s extended hands. They obviously love to play, to compete, so you decide to join the game too. You lock your eyes with Jeongin and take his hand. “Let’s go,” you say, slapping on the sweetness. Your eyes flick to Chan. “I’m starving.” And as you are helped from the car by Jeongin, you brush past Chan, purposely bumping his shoulder with yours and never breaking eye contact. The smirk he gives you makes your knees wobble. Almost as if you’re his prey and you’ve walked right into his trap.

Chapter Text

The restaurant is surprisingly large compared to what you imagine when you first walked up to the building. There are tables scattered all around and beautiful ornate detailing lining the walls. You take a mental picture deciding you want to draw this place when you get back home. At this time of morning, it’s not very busy, with only a few tables towards the entrance holding older couples. You think the guys must come here frequently because they are greeted promptly as you enter and whisked away to a closed room in the back corner.

Chan enters the room first and then Jeongin, who has intertwined your fingers together. He’s been mindlessly rubbing his thumb across your knuckles in a very rhythmic and smoothing pattern. The action makes your heart tumble. For someone who doesn’t allow people close to her heart so easily, you already feel attached to him in a way you can’t explain. The room itself is pretty small, just enough space for the 3 of you, so it feels very intimate. Chan is standing to the left of the table with a chair pulled out for you. With a squeeze to Jeongin’s hand, you slip from his grip and you sit down. Chan seems satisfied enough as he sits beside you. Jeongin sits across from you and grabs up his menu. While he's a little distracted, you look at Chan, who is staring down at you.

At this angle you feel small. Despite yourself, you awkwardly break eye contact and reach down for the menu in front of you. “So what's good here?” You say to no one in particular. After some back and forth with Chan and Jeongin as they describe different dishes to you, you decide to try the Kimichi Jjigae. When the waitress returns, Chan orders for the table and you descend into a conversation with Jeongin. It’s effortless to chat with him as you discuss details about your life. He then asks about your recovery and is very sweet and apologetic about the whole ordeal. Apparently he was the friend Chan was with that night. It makes you feel closer to him in a way.

Chan hasn’t said much since you arrived and nervously you wonder if you’ve upset him by getting so comfortable with Jeongin so quickly. When the food comes out you chance a glance at him. And still he’s watching you, something dark swirling in his eyes. His gaze brings heat to your cheeks and you quickly turn to your food but just quickly Chan grabs your chin turning you to look back up at him. His hand is warm to the touch, and firm. It’s not a painful grip but the look in his eyes and the way he licks his bottom lip, brings a warm feeling to the pit of your stomach and you clench your legs together. He says absolutely nothing to you, just staring at your features. Your eyes, your nose, your lips. He lingers there the longest before dropping your chin and returning to his food.

Blinking dumbly you look at Jeongin who, to your horror, has seen the entire encounter. His cheeks are flushed and when he notices you looking he smiles sheepishly looking between the two of you. You quickly glance away and begin to eat. The awkward quiet in the room doesn’t last for long as Chan and Jeongin find a playful rhythm. While they are distracted with each other’s company you take a moment to gather yourself. The heat in Chan’s gaze and the controlling nature of his behavior today have you questioning a lot about yourself. You’re not completely inexperienced with men. You know there are people who love more rough expressions of love and sex but you’re really clueless about those things. The only thing that comes to mind when you think of the possessive nature of his actions today is a book you read years ago that had you very wound up and confused. After reading that book you always said you could never be the type of girl to allow such force, even if it brought you pleasure, but the way your body feels at Chris’ obvious show of dominance was completely unexpected.

“Everything okay? You’re red as a tomato..” Your eyes snap up to Jeongin who appears to be holding in a laugh.

You realize, stupidly, that thinking about smut at the breakfast table is probably not the most polite thing to do. Especially surrounded by two men who you’re sure could fold you like a pretzel. ‘Shit,’ you think, ‘don’t imagine that..’ But it’s too late. Now your brain is thinking of all kinds of crazy positions and possibilities and you have to get up to excuse yourself to the bathroom.

After a few minutes of deep breaths and fanning yourself, you’re back to the table eating your food as nonchalantly as possible.

There’s a different mood at the table when you return but you can’t exactly put your finger on what's changed. Both men are being conversational with you and touchy even more so. Chan’s hand has found a resting place on your thigh. He doesn’t grip you with the force he showed before but with each movement of your leg, he gives a little squeeze. Jeongin, across the table from you has stretched out some, his legs reaching into your personal space causing you to have no choice but to cross your legs with him.

The meal is delicious and when you’re done Chan offers to pay for both you and Jeongin to which you were going to object but he insisted. “I can’t let you pay on the first date.” He nudges you playfully and you’re struck with even more confusion about the whole ordeal.

You lead the way out of the restaurant this time and insist on sitting in the back instead of the passenger seat. Chan doesn’t love the idea but you don’t give him the chance to object or stop you as you slide into the seat behind him.

“What are your plans today?” Jeongin asks as you both get settled into the car.

“I have a date with my sketchbook at 1pm and then a meeting with my shower at 6pm. Other than that a whole lot of nothing.” He laughs at your sarcasm and it brings a smile to your face. Really something about this man is just so consuming for you.

Chan is eyeing you through the mirror. “I didn’t know you drew.”
You wiggle your eyebrows at him playfully. “Theres a lot you don’t know about me stranger.” You add all the teasing you can into that last worst which sends Jeongin into another laughing fit.

Chan starts the car and pulls away without saying anything for a while then, “I have to run by our dorm to pick up some things so I will drop you off first Innie.” You realize this must be his nickname because Jeongin nods wordlessly.

“Do either of you have any fun plans today?” You're staring out the window as you speak.

Jeongin answers first. “Today? Not really. It’s my first day that I don’t have any plans in a while.” He shrugs. “Channie-hyung, are we still meeting up with the team later?”

You listen back and forth as they talk about schedule conflicts and meetings. You’re really not too positive what all of it means. They mention a bunch of names of people you don’t know and after a while of trying to piece things together you give up and lean your head on the window. It’s possible the morning just wore you out because before you know it you’re drifting off to sleep listening to the sound of their voices.

As a child and throughout your young adult life, your dreams have always been vivid. With the new trauma and memory loss they have only gotten worse. In this dream you’re sitting in the living room in your father’s home. He’s laying on the couch crying, his face stuffed into a pillow and you’re kneeling on the floor in front of him.

“Please papa. You haven’t been eating again.” He says nothing so you grab his arm, tugging gently. “Please papa plea-“ Suddenly his arm reaches out and pushes you. As you fall the scene changes slightly and you’re being pushed to the ground in a dark alley way, tape on your lips. You’re hyperventilating as you scramble to your feet and run. Ahead of you is nothing but darkness. The further you go the darker the area around you becomes until you look around and you’re totally consumed by it. You hear a rumbling deep laugh that sets the hairs on your neck on end. “Stop! Stop!” You’re screaming at the top of your lungs. Your voice escapes you as man walks out of the blackness. You can't make out his face but you know his voice as he shouts, “Bitch!” He pushes you down again and darkness takes over.

You’re being shaken, not violently but enough to jostle the pain in your head and you jerk as you regain consciousness. Your eyes are darting all around you as the sharp stabbing in your head sends you into what you can only describe as a panic attack. You hear voices close by. They are saying something to you but the ringing in your ears makes it impossible to know what it is. Your vision is spotty, black dots swirl around as you blink rapidly trying to gain a sense of your surroundings. That's when you feel hands on your shoulder and knee. They are warm and gentle but that doesn’t stop you from jerking away and shrieking. In the next moment you feel strong arms wrap around you tightly from behind and you begin wiggling and pulling trying to get free. You’re scratching at the arms and crying, pleading.

That's when you hear it. It sounds vaguely familiar but you can’t make it out, words still sounding mumbled and mushed together. It takes a moment for you to realize they're singing. You know the song too, your mother would sing it to you while she played the piano. You see her then, in your mind. A beautiful yellow dress, cheeks full and plump. A smile that dazzled you every time you saw it. Slowly the world comes back to you and you hear the song clearly although you know it’s not your mom singing to you. As your breathing slows and your muscles relax you close your eyes tight and focus on that song.

“Like a river flows
Surely to the sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Take my hand
Take my whole life, too
For I can't help falling in love with you
For I can't help falling in love with you”

You breathe out a staggered breath. Slowly, the arms around you loosen and you feel something soft brush against the back of your neck. You’re not sure, but it feels like a kiss.

Finally you open your eyes and find that you're still sitting in the back seat of the car, it’s no longer moving and Chan and Jeongin are out of their seats. You look to your right first and meet eyes with Jeongin who has a look of devastation on his face. You can't look at him for long, his smile and his joy long gone. It makes your heart ache to know that you’re the one to cause that look.

Before you have a chance to look to your left, a hand grabs your chin and gently turns your face. It’s Chan of course and seeing him makes your eyes sting with the threat of tears all over again. You don’t even care that he’s seen you freak out, you feel deep in your heart that you would let this man see all of you if he asked. All the awkwardness, the pain, the fear. He could have it all.

His face is soft, a slight curve to his lips. “It’s okay. I’m here.” Then he scoops you up into his arms and carries you out of the car. You don’t object, though you hate the idea of being seen as the helpless damsel. You also realize that your body feels incredibly weak and you are not confident at all that you’d be able to hold yourself up. You wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face into his chest.

Not even bothering to look around or worry about your surroundings you feel Chan’s body enter a building that smells woodsy and clean. He walks up several stairs and then opens a door. After a moment you’re laid down gently in a bed that smells just like him. He doesn’t let you go once you’re laid down though, he just curls in behind you, pulling you close to him. Your back is pressed to his chest and he adjusts his arms so that one is under the pillow and the other is draped across your waist. You hear some more shuffling and you open your eyes just barely to see Jeongin pull a chair over to the side of the bed across from you.

Cautiously he reaches out his hand towards you and when he sees that you’re not going to pull away, he brushes your bangs out of your eyes and rubs your cheek with his thumb. His other arm is tucked under his chin as he rests his head on the bed watching you. For a while you all stay like this. Chan is humming a song that you’re not familiar with but the rumble of his chest is soothing to your body. Jeongin pulls his hand away from your face and towards your own and slowly, he massages circles into it. You’re not sure how much time has passed when you hear a phone ringing and Chan has to pull away from you to answer it.

“Yes… yes I know. Just reschedule it okay? I can't leave right now.” He sounds frustrated with whoever he's speaking to. Then you remember he said he had to grab things and rush to a meeting today.

You drop Jeongin’s hand, to which he lets out a cute whine. You turn over carefully and you look up at Chan who is sitting on the edge of the bed. He just hung up the phone and has set it back down when you start to speak.

“Do not tell me you canceled your meeting…” After a while not speaking and with all the screaming you did earlier, your voice sounds weak.

His head flicks down to you, his eye brows furrowed in confusion as if you said something in a different language. “Of course I did. I wasn’t going to leave you after… that.”
You shake your head in disbelief. “You can't put your life on hold for a stranger Chan.” Just then Jeongin mumbles something about needing water and shuffles out of the room, closing the door behind him. You watch him leave, a pang of sadness reaching you at his absence, then you look back to Chan.

“Do you want me to go?” His eyes are sincere, searching.

You shake your head, breaking eye contact and looking down to your fingers. “No, of course not. But I’ve caused you and Jeongin so much trouble and I’m not worth the effort you keep putting in. You don’t even know me.” Your gaze flicks back to his and you can see the frustration. You think that Chan is the type of person to hide away his true feelings and for once instead of smirking or changing the subject, he allows you in.

“I want to. I want to know everything about you.” He licks his lips and lays back looking up at the ceiling. “That night that… you know.” The night you were attacked, a shiver runs through your body at the thought. “I’m not usually the type to care so much about strangers. I care a lot about the people I love and I would die for any of them.” His sigh is long and you imagine he's thinking of how to say whatever is on his mind. “I wasn’t going to stay with you at all. I really thought about leaving before you woke up. But when I was gathering my stuff and about to walk out the door..” He sits up and looks down at you intently. “I saw you lying there, alone and I couldn’t. There's something about you that I’m drawn to and I can't explain it. It’s unlike anything I’ve felt before and it’s terrifying.” He shuts his eyes tightly and you study his face. His chin, his cheeks, his lips. You feel the urge to lean into him. You’re shocked back to reality when he speaks again. “I begged Innie to come with me to breakfast this morning.”

You scrunch your face at this. “I thought you said-“

“I know, I lied because I didn’t want to look like a nervous fool.” He shakes his head. “I was scared to see you. I was scared the veil would be ripped away and the next time you looked at me you wouldn’t see me as just Chan anymore. You’re so refreshing and beautiful and funny and..”

Now you’re blushing hard. He notices this and smiles. “And you don’t even realize it, which is insane to me. I do want to get to know you more though. I want to know everything. And I want you to know everything too.”

Just then he gets out of the bed quickly and walks to his desk on the opposite side of the room. He picks up his laptop and makes his wake back to you. He climbs into the bed and begins typing on his computer. “I didn’t know how to bring this up. With your concussion how was I supposed to know if you really didn’t recognize me or if I was just being a conceited ass.”

The confusion you have reaches a new level making your head throb. “Chan, I don’t understand.”

He laughs softly, that cheeky smile and dimples making their appearance. “Just listen okay. And don’t say anything until the end please.”

And so you do. He plays a song you feel that you’ve heard before. You’re not super familiar with it but that's really just because you’re not super familiar with K-pop in general. The song is really good though and by the end you smile widely.

“That was a good song! What's the name of it?” You’re looking at him expectantly and he looks slightly nervous again which causes you to bite your lip.

“It’s S-Class, by Stray Kids.” He says plainly.

Your face screws up again as you think hard. “I feel like I’ve heard of them before but honestly I’m not sure.”

Then he pulls his laptop back up and he's tapping away again, you watch him carefully. Before long he’s pulled up a music video version of the song and you watch as he presses play.

It’s not until you’re about 35 seconds into the video that your mouth drops open and your hand flies out to pause the picture on the screen. You realize immediately what Chan was so scared to tell you. What he was nervous about you realizing about him. You snap your head to him, eyes wide. He stares at you, that same nervous expression on his face.

“I don’t know what to say… this is… oh my God.” You put your head in your hands trying to process it all.

There’s absolutely no way that you’re not dreaming right now. You feel immediately embarrassed about all the things you’ve said and done in front of this man. In front of this Idol. This insanely famous idol. On top of the embarrassment you feel stupid. You may not have known much about Stray Kids but now you're sitting here in the home of one of the members and..

“Wait!” You shout. Chan watches you expectantly as you turn the music video back on and watch through to the end. “Jeongin too? Oh my God.” You take your hand and smack it to your forehead.

Chris’ nerves have dissipated and been replaced with a soft chuckle. “So you really had no clue?”

Disbelievingly you shake your head. “I really don't follow any music stars too closely. But this… wow, Chan.”

He reaches over and shuts down the laptop. “So,” you say with a smirk, “I was saved by a K-pop idol huh?”

You both end up laughing and collapsing to the bed. It’s ridiculous and sweet all at once. At some point the laughing dies down and you both are curled back into each other’s arms. Maybe it's the shock of it all but knowing this about him makes you feel even closer in a way. You spend a little time asking him questions about all of it. He answers honestly and recalls a few stories. But eventually you run out of things to ask and he brushes a hair in front of your face, pulling your chin so that your head is tilted up to look at him. “Now it’s your turn. I want to know everything.”

Chapter Text

You stare at him for a while contemplating. It's not that you have secrets or skeletons in your closet, but your life has been full of some of the most traumatic and intense experiences. You naturally have a hard time speaking on any of it. How would he feel to know just how broken you are? How pain and suffering follow you at all seconds to the point that you refuse to fully allow yourself to be happy because you don’t deserve to be. You don’t normally feel so close to someone this soon into knowing them. The fact that the man sitting in front of you is an idol doesn't even seem to phase you surprisingly. You decided that, someone with that many fans, that much fame, using his personal time to help some strange girl means more to you now that you know the truth. He is someone you refuse to lose, someone that you will not allow to be hurt by your awful luck.

“There’s not much to know…” You’re staring down at your hands, playing with your fingers nervously. “My mom died when I was young and my dad died after I graduated highschool” Chan sighs and reaches out to you. You take his hand into yours and smile up at him. “I lived in the states at the time and went to university. It was lonely but I really didn’t mind it. Just the normal university experience.” It pains you to lie to him in this way. To pretend like you didn't suffer from years of abuse by the people you loved the most.

Chan’s smile is somber as he intertwines your fingers together. “You’re so strong… you know that right?”
You scoff and shake your head. “Thank you. But really it's no big deal at all.” You remove your hands from his and push a piece of hair away from his forehead, as if on instinct he leans into your touch. “So, you need to call back whoever you were talking to and tell them you’ll be there for the meeting.”

Incredulously he stares at you. “You’re joking right?”
“Absolutely not.” You cross your arms and stare back at him.

A smirk crosses his lips as he looks you up and down. “I do like to be bossed around sometimes but only when there’s less clothes involved.”

Your jaw drops and you reach out and smack him on the arm, which you know was not hard enough to do any damage but regardless Chan reacts like you’re a 300lb wrestler. He is flailing and crying on the bed so loudly that Jeongin has made a reappearance looking concerned.

“Excuse him, Innie, he's being a cry baby.” You’re laughing so hard that you think you might start to cry. In all the time you’ve spent with Chan today, you’ve seen so many layers being pulled back that you genuinely believe he can’t be real. He's too perfect.

Jeongin is staring at you with surprise and something darker etched across his features. You can’t put your finger on it and just as you're about to ask, Chan interrupts. “Yeah Innie.” He wiggles his eyebrows at Jeongin, as he gets out of the bed and walks over to his closet, and you realize why he's reacted this way.

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize… I just… sorry.” Your face is hot with embarrassment. While Jeongin is such a sweet person and you feel close to him in a way that scares you, you know it's not very polite to refer to someone outside of their name without permission. You’ve always felt so strongly that your nickname was off limits to anyone who you didn’t fully trust. “Junie” is the name your mom gave you. Very few people have been allowed to use that in your life.

“No no.” Jeongin rushes over to you, his smile back on his face. “It just surprised me. You can call me whatever you want. Jeongin, I.N., Innie.” He sits beside you on Chan’s bed and you both just stare at each other for a moment. From his hair, perfectly messy, his high cheekbones, and sweet smile that makes you feel like you could talk to him for hours, you realize yes, this man is absolutely a famous idol and he deserves it all. They both do and you can only assume the rest of the members would be just as caring as they are.

“Stay here until I get back, then I can take you home before we need to meet up with the rest of the guys for dinner.” Chan breaks the moment between you and I.N. His voice seems oddly cold compared to the playfulness you shared together just minutes ago.

If Jeongin notices the change in mood he shows no signs of caring as he smiles even brighter at you. “I guess you’re stuck with me then.” He stands and holds a hand out to you. You grasp it and allow him to lead you out of Chan’s room. However, before you make it out of the threshold of the door, Chan is behind you wrapping a strong arm around your waist.

His breath cascades down your neck, sending a shiver through you and you think he's noticed that reaction because then he squeezes you even closer to him. There’s no way to deny the intimacy of the position, but desperately you try to push those thoughts aside realizing that your hand is still intertwined with Jeongin’s. Chan’s voice is soft as he leans into your ear, so close that if you were to twitch even a little, his lips would press to the sensitive spot where your ear meets your neck. “Be a good girl for Innie okay?” Your eyes which have fluttered closed, shoot up to Jeongin’s. He’s watching the entire encounter between the two of you biting his lip softly, and you notice his eyes seem slightly dilated. Before you can utter a response to Chan, he lets you go and walks away to finish getting ready.

Flustered and confused, you allow Jeongin to lead you away from Chan’s room and back down to the main floor. “So,” he says as you make it to the large sitting room. “You found out about us, huh?”

His question catches you off guard as you try to get your emotions under control. The feel of Chan behind you was different than when he had held you after your panic attack. You refuse to admit it but something about being between the two of them with Jeongin eyes burning into you left you feeling warm all over.

As you sit in the plush couch Jeongin repeats his question, watching you as if he knows exactly what you’re thinking. With an eyeroll and a gentle nudge to his shoulder you say, “You make it sound like you’re all in a cult or vampires or something.” This causes you both to laugh and I.N. walks to you mimicking a vampire.

“Let me suck your blood.” He moans and then he’s on top of you tickling at your side.

It’s fun and lighthearted but then you twist your head too quickly and a stabbing pain courses through you. You yelp out in pain and Jeongin quickly removes himself. His eyes are wide with worry and he places a hand on your thigh. “I’m so sorry. Shit… What can I do?”

You hear thunderous footsteps coming at you and then Chan’s voice at your side. “What happened, are you okay?”
When you open your eyes they are both staring at you worry etched across their features. You nod your head and offer a weak smile. “Guys, I’m fine. I just moved my head too quickly.” You take a deep breath and roll your neck around slowly.

Chan walks closer to Jeongin and grips him on the arm. “Be careful, okay? I’ll be back in a few hours.” Jeongin nods, his hand still on your thigh now rubbing small circles there. Despite the pain his touch soothes you, the rhythmic circles distract you from the pain. Chan leans down and kisses your temple before heading to the door with his laptop in tow. “I’m just meeting with 3racha and management, and then I’ll be back for you.”

You furrow your eyebrows. “3rach-“ but before you can even finish your sentence Chan is out of the door.
You turn your gaze to Jeongin, “I know there's a lot that I don’t know but any chance you’d like to give me the cliff notes?”

He smiles impossibly bright. “Buckle in, there’s alot.” And then he begins the story of Stray Kids.

———————

Jeongin tells you everything. You learn about how the group was formed, you learn more about each of the members, you even learn about some of their current projects which sends a thrill through you. More than anything though, you learn that they have been through a lot together and really have become family through it all.

When he’s done with his story which does take a few hours to tell, you’re thoroughly ready for a nap. After your third time yawning Jeongin scoops you into his arms. You’re ashamed to admit that you weren’t expecting his strength as he carries you easily up the stairs. He walks past what you remember to be Chan’s room and then he kicks open a door to what you can only assume is his own room.

He places you gently on his bed and smiles down at you. “You should rest.” You sit up with a groan and he shakes his head at you in disbelief. “What part of the word ‘rest’ aren’t you getting?"

“Trust me I get it, but I haven't been able to really rest in days.” You think back to this morning, when you drifted to sleep. For days these same dreams have terrorized you.

He raises an eyebrow to you and sits beside you on the bed. “Are they nightmares?”

With a shrug you roll your eyes. “It’s dumb. I’ve just never been a peaceful sleeper I guess.” His face has lost most of the boyish charm as he stares at you intently. The concern on his face squeezes your heart, you don’t want him to worry but it’s just so easy to tell him the truth. “Before, in the car, I had a dream about the night I was… attacked.” Your voice lowers to a whisper on the word, as if saying it any louder would wake the panic inside of you.

Jeongin sighs softly and lays down on his pillow holding his arms out to you. There's something about the gesture that threatens tears to spring from your eyes, but you oblige and curl into his arms. Your head is laying on his chest right above his heart, you drape an arm across his middle and pull your leg up on top of his own. He holds you there as you listen to the thump in his chest. It's steady and calming and you realize his touch has been that way for you since you first met only hours ago.

“You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to… but I will listen to you when you’re ready.” Your eyes close at his words and a few tears do fall. Maybe he hears your stuttered breathing as you cry because he begins to rub your back soothingly. You’re not crying from sadness or fear but from genuine happiness. In the last 6 hours since you’ve been with Chan and Jeongin, you have laughed and smiled more than you have in months.

You shift slightly, wiping your tears on the sleeve of your shirt and you tilt your head to look at him. Unsurprisingly his eyes are already on you as they seem to always be when you're around him. Both of you just stare at each other for a while. You really study his features, burning them into your memory for you to draw later on.

You’ve had very few romantic partners in your life. With the instability of your father, you weren't allowed to date and in college you were too focused on your studying to care about guys. Casual relationships have been the best thing for you because you don’t allow yourself to get too attached but as you stare at this man holding you. You feel immediately that there could be nothing casual here if you allowed yourself to fall. But, with a pang of guilt you remind yourself that there's no way you could give into those feelings that are already boiling at the surface. Not only do you really like Jeongin, but you have a connection with Chan, the man who saved your life. To choose would be torture and you arent even clear on if either of them would even be interested, though their actions would be bizarre if otherwise.

Regardless you have to keep them at some distance because you know the universe will find some way to break them away from you. You are not destined to be happy so whatever feelings you have must be held in.

Jeongin breaks you from your train of thought, his eyes still on you. “I want to kiss you.” The darkness in his gaze has returned and your breathing catches in your throat.

“I… what?” You're blinking dumbly at him, confused if the thoughts in your head are betraying the reality of the situation. Over and over again you feel that Jeongin can read into your mind, that even with only hours of knowing each other, he knows you better than most people in your life ever have.

A pink flush has crept up his cheeks and he shakes his head. “Please don’t make me say it again…” His voice is soft, and it caresses over you. You’re still blinking at him as he leans down closer to you. He places one hand under your chin to tilt your head back even further, and uses his other hand to adjust your entire body to where you are nearly straddling him. He licks his lips and leans into you, and you let him. Though you know this is bound to end badly, you lean into those feelings that you tried to push away and you kiss him.

Part of you would’ve thought kissing Jeongin would be a sweet peck but in reality, it's passionate and hot. The hand he had placed under your chin trails down to your neck. He doesn't grip you with any force but just the act tells you everything you need to know about the type of lover this man is. His other hand has made its way up into your hair where he wraps his fingers into it and pulls. He is gentle enough not to trigger any pains in your head but forceful enough that a moan escapes your lips and you feel a smirk raise to Jeongin’s.

Then you hear a loud clap from the door to Jeongin’s room and it startles you so bad you jump off of him, gasping and turn to face the door. Chan is standing in the open doorway, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes are dark and his expression is unreadable.

“I guess you took being a good girl for Jeongin a little too literally…” He trails his tongue across his bottom lip, his eyes not leaving yours. “I’ll be down stairs waiting while you two finish up.” And he turns on his heel and stalks away.

You’re scrambling to your feet trying your best not to jostle your head around too much. Jeongin is still laying on his bed as you rush out of the room and after Chan. “Wait!” You choke out breathing heavily.

He hasn't made it to the stairs yet and he slowly turns in your direction. “Well that was quick…” He has a smirk on his face and you really aren’t able to distinguish what he may be feeling.

“It was an accident. I’m sorry.” You take a few more steps in his direction closing the distance between you. “I was just caught up in the moment.”

Chan raises his eyebrow at you. His expression isn’t harsh like you imagined it would be if he was angry. “Really… it’s okay. Jeongin’s never been someone to waste his time.” He gives you a soft smile. “Maybe I’m a little jealous he got to you first though.”

Your breath catches in your chest and you furrow your eyebrows but before you can ask, someone has slipped their arms around your waist from behind and you hear Jeongin’s laugh rumble in his chest. “You were right about her, she is special.”

At this you jerk out of his arms and look back and forth between them. “Excuse me, what are you talking about?”

Chan reaches his hand out to you, pulling you into his body. You’re shocked at the movement as your eyes lock onto his. He dips his head down so that his lips graze your ear softly which causes a shiver to run through you. “Let’s not pretend like your body doesn’t give away exactly how you feel about us, love.” You’re utterly speechless at the change of direction in this conversation. Where you thought Chan seemed angry about your intimate encounter with Jeongin, he seems thrilled by it. “Are you ready to go then?” Chan’s pulled away from you now and has started down the stairs.

Jeongin moves into your line of sight, he has that playful smile on his lips as he rubs the back of his neck nervously. “I’m not sorry about the kiss.” Gently he takes your hand in his and pulls you towards him and he places a kiss on your forehead. It hadn’t registered to you at first but many times today these men have pulled and moved you as they please, whether a tug on the arm or picking you up and carrying you away. Not once have they asked and only now, as you’ve been pulled yet again into Jeongin’s arms do you realize that you like it. The confidence and the way that they handled you without hesitation was hot and it caused you to feel a tightness in the bottom of your stomach. “I’m only sorry that it ended so soon.” You stare up at him and feel it then, deep in your chest you know that you will fall hard for this man.

He guides you down the stairs to the living room where Chan is sitting, fiddling on his phone. You turn to Jeongin and give him a quick hug goodbye. As he leaves to head back to his room, you walk over to Chan and sit beside him on the couch. “This day… has been exhausting.”

Chan’s touch is gentle as runs his fingers down your shoulder, to your elbow. “Well let’s go so I can take you home.” You nod at him.

—————————

The ride home is uneventful. He doesn’t try to make conversation, maybe he just realizes that the gears in your head are working overtime at all the stimulus from the day.
You look over to him and sigh. “I want you to understand this is all very unlike me. I’m not a trusting person, I struggle with real intimacy. This is all a lot to take in.” Carefully you reach over and grab him. You trace over his knuckles, then his palm. “I don’t want to hurt you so I think we should just be casual.” It hurts to say. To deny yourself the ability to soak in the happiness that Chan and Jeongin have given you.

His hand tightens around yours with a squeeze. “If that’s what you want.” Your heart breaks slightly at the sound of his voice, like it's the last thing he wants to say.
“Besides,” you say, letting go of his hand and turning to look out of the window. “I’m sure you have your pick of any girl in the world.”

He doesn’t respond, but you can feel his gaze on you. You’re too scared to look, to meet his eyes and see the pity there. That you really are just a fun stranger to tease. You hate that you feel so drawn to him.

Eventually you arrive home and despite your efforts to explain to him that you don’t need an escort inside, he still accompanies you to your door. You take out your keys and unlock it and then turn to him. “I’ve had a great time today. Besides all of my freak outs.” Stepping closer to him you move up on your toes and you place a kiss to his cheek.
He gives you a smile and then an overly dramatic bow. “Until next time.” He says and then gives you a wink and a chuckle that reminds you just why you have befriended this man. He has a way to make you feel like nothing in life can be so awful.

He turns on his heel and stalks away down the hall. “Goodbye Chan.” You whisper after him.

Chapter Text

The next day you finally return to work and for the first time you feel that your head isn’t a ticking time bomb. It’s a light workload today by G’s orders, so you spend most of the shift at the register. Despite the emotional rollercoaster of the day prior, you haven’t heard anything from Chan and really that may be for the best as you still haven’t fully processed the insane series of events. While you work you ponder what exactly Jeongin and Chan believe to be happening between the three of you. You run through many different possibilities and come to the same conclusion each time, they know you are insanely attracted to each of them and they seem absolutely fine with sharing.

Once your work day has ended you decide it would be a great idea to take Lia out to dinner. It’s the first day since your concussion that you actually have a chance to spend with her. So when you text her on your break she accepts and says she will come by and pick you up after your shift.

As you both sit down at the back of the restaurant she reaches her hand out to you and you grab on with a smile.
“I’ve missed you.” She says with a squeeze. Lia is naturally a busy person. Even on her days off she has her schedule booked out. She’s currently in school studying to be a nurse but she also works every other night at a bar. Not to mention she has a boyfriend of 3 years who is bound to propose any day now.

You roll your eyes at her. “We see each other everyday, Lia. Don’t be so dramatic. How was class today?”

And then she descends into a long winded story about her lab partner. One thing you can appreciate about Lia is that she can talk for days and you genuinely love to listen. She makes it easy too because she's so naturally animated.

After your food arrives she furrows her eyebrows at you.
“When are you going to fill me in on your little date with your mystery man?” The stare she gives you reminds you of how a mom may look when she's trying not to be obvious about prying into your business. Another thing about Lia is that she is protective of you. Ever since you decided to move in with her she has taken you under her wing and rarely lets you stray away from her without constant updates. However when you got home last night and went straight to your room, she must’ve realized your time with Chan didn't go as planned.

With a sigh you sit back and stare up at the ceiling. “I don’t even know how to start…”

She rolls her eyes and nudges you with her foot. “Tell me everything.”

And you do. You start off by explaining the biggest surprise, that your two breakfast dates are members of Stray Kids which gets a very sharp squeal of joy from Lia. Then you explain how breakfast went, the panic attack in the car and even the kiss you shared with Innie. You decide to leave out the conflicting details about your feelings for them both. That part just feels too confusing to process.

Lia stares at you with rapt attention as you divulge almost every detail of your time and by then end of it all her jaw is on the floor. “You have the best luck I swear. Two hot guys. Excuse me, two hot idols.” She emphasizes the last word and wiggles her eyebrows at you.

You shake your head and roll your eyes. “You do realize none of this would’ve happened if it weren't for me getting attacked right?”

“Oh shit… yeah that's true.” Her expression turns somber. “How are you feeling about that?” Her eyes search your face, as if they are looking to find any hint of that trauma.

You break eye contact from her and look around the restaurant. “I’m still not really sleeping… it’s been hard to… relax you know?”

She nods. “I’m sorry for bringing it up. Maybe we can go-“ but before she can finish her phone starts to buzz. “Sorry, it’s my boss.” She places the phone to her ear. The conversation is short and sweet and before she can even hang up you know that she's been called in to work a shift at the bar.

Lia looks at your annoyance written all over her face. “This is the worst timing.”

You laugh and shake your head. “Go, seriously. Make it up to me another time.” She’s looking at you with a look of shock on her face as you flag down the waitress. “I’m serious Lia. You always say you wish they would give you more shifts.”

She lets out a groan and nods her head. “You’re right as always. But let me call you a cab okay? There’s no way I’m letting you take the bus.”

In no time at all you’re sliding into the back of the cab as Lia waves you off. “Text me as soon as you get to the apartment!” You nod and promise her you’ll send the text.

When the cab pulls in front of your building you thank the driver and hop out onto the street. The night air is crisp, sending a shiver down your back. As you’re about to step up to the building, you feel as though there are eyes on you. You pause and slowly turn your body until you're looking across the street at the storefront across from your apartment. The windows are dark and the street lamp is very faint, flickering on and off every so often.

For a moment you believe you’re just staring at a mannequin in the store window. But then it moves slightly and turns to you and you realize, it's a man. He is tall and very large. He wears a black cap on his head so that you cannot fully see his face. There’s something about him, about his frame that scares you so badly you feel your heart begin to hammer in your chest.

Just as he takes a single step in your direction, you turn and run into your apartment building. You don’t stop at all running to your door and throwing it open before stepping inside and shutting it closed behind you. As you breathe heavily you fumble with the lock. Finally you turn the bolt but you refuse to let out a sigh of relief because now you hear heavy footsteps in your hallway. They are getting closer to your door and then they stop. Carefully you take a few steps back until you are in your kitchen. You slip open a drawer and feel around until you have your hands on a knife. It’s silent outside but you aren’t fully convinced that there’s not a reason to be on edge. You slide to the floor in the kitchen and pull your knees to your chest.

Then he speaks. His voice low and muffled through the door but it triggers a memory inside of you. You realize, yes, this is the man who came for you. The one who grabbed you in the club and forced you outside. You can see it now like a veil being torn open in your brain. You can see his face clearly. “I know where you live now… there's no escaping your past, Junie.”

As the memory solidifies in your mind you feel your heart beat rapidly and your eyes go blurry. ‘Now is not the time for a panic attack’ you think as you grip the knife even tighter. Remembering suddenly that you can call the police for help you glance around and see your phone sitting on the counter. You’re so stiff and scared that reaching for it feels painful. Once you have it though you immediately dial the police.

The next few minutes feel like hours as you wait for an officer to arrive. The man outside doesn’t speak again and with the threat of your panic attack, you can’t do anything more than cry quietly on the floor in your kitchen. Within 3 minutes you hear a harsh knock on the door. “Police!” Your heart is thumping so loudly you aren't sure if you are just hearing things but as you make your way cautiously to the door, they call out again. You know this is not the same voice of the man who attacked you so you open it, and breathe out a desperate sigh of relief at the officers in front of you.

For the next hour you fill them in on everything. They ask for any details you can finally remember about the night you were attacked and you give them everything you can. By some act of God you were able to get through the entirety without any panic. As they are gathering their notes to leave, the younger officer asks, “do you have anywhere else you could stay until we get everything sorted out? It’s likely the man may come here again and with how bold he was tonight, you may not be so lucky if it happens again.”

“I will make some phone calls.” Your voice is weak as the adrenaline of the night slowly leaves you.

“Would you like us to stay while you get that sorted out?” The concern in his voice threatens tears in your eyes but you nod graciously and grab your phone as you walk into the kitchen.

You realize you don’t have anywhere else to go, at least not anywhere that feels safe. You’ve already texted Lia about the ordeal but you know she won’t read her texts until her break in an hour. Just as you start scrolling through your contact list looking for someone to help you out. Your phone starts to buzz with a call from Chan. Quickly you answer it.
“Chan…” He must sense the weakness and fear in your voice as he speaks.

“What is it? Are you hurt?” His voice oozes with concern.
You release a stuttered breath. “I know this is a lot to ask… but I need somewhere to sleep tonight.”

Through the phone you hear a rustle of keys and some hurried movement. “I’m on my way to you now. Don’t hang up.”

You can still hear the police officers in the sitting room chatting. While in the kitchen you pull a stool out from the counter and you sit down, listening to Chan’s breathing through the phone. After 20 minutes there's a knock at your door and the police let Chan in with your permission. Then they wish you a goodnight and leave.

Chan is at your side instantly. “Are you hurt?” His voice is low, almost a growl as he checks you all over.

“I’m fine… just shaken up. If you give me a second I’ll just go grab some stuff and meet you back here.” You start towards your room and Chan stays right behind you the whole time.

One thing you appreciate about Chan is his ability to read a situation and know how to act. He immediately steps in to help you pack your bag. You grumble about not knowing how much to pack and he dismisses your concerns letting you know that he would be able to come back here himself to pick up anything you may need. It doesn’t take long for you to stuff your things away and all the while Chan is watching you as if you’re a porcelain doll on the verge of cracking. However, he doesn’t prod you with questions or demands of understanding what may have happened to you. You’re grateful for that.

Once you’re packed and headed out of your apartment to Chan’s car you get a call from Lia.

“I knew I shouldn’t have left you tonight!” Her voice is shrill. You can hear her breathing heavily. “Just tell me you’re okay?”

As you answer, Chan opens the door for you and you slip inside. As he is accustomed to, he leans in and fastens your seat belt. “I’m safe. Just really really scared. I can give you all the details later. I’m going to stay at Chan’s tonight.”

There’s a long pause. “Are you sure? I can get us a hotel room.” You glance over at Chan who has slipped into his seat and started the car. His hands are tight on the steering wheel as he drives, the whites of his knuckles showing and his veins popping all over his arm. He’s tense and his eyebrows are furrowed. You can tell he’s very angry.

With a sigh you reply to Lia, “I’m safe with him. It’s okay.” After more pleas, she finally accepts the fact that you will be with Chan. She does offer a reminder that you can call her any time. You beg her to stay with her boyfriend for a few days until everything calms down and she promises she will. Then you hang up.

At some point Chan’s hand has found your thigh. You begin to trace his fingers and the veins in his hand. For a while the two of you stay that way, then he speaks. “There’s a spare room across from Jeongin’s that you’re welcome to have. Have you eaten?”

You nod wordlessly. It’s not that you don’t want to tell him everything that happened tonight, it’s just that if you do, you know it will become all too real, and you’re not ready to deal with that. What you need is a distraction. As you continue fiddling with his hand, you glance at him again.

He’s wearing a pair of gray sweat pants and a muscle shirt where the arm hole drops down to his waist, allowing you to see everything underneath. Your eyes linger there, tracing the curves of his muscles down his chest and abdomen. You have to drag your eyes away from him before you inevitably start drooling and embarrassingly you find that Chan has been watching you the whole time. He has a smirk on his face that emphasizes the dimple in his cheek. You turn your face away from him, knowing that the blush on your face is very incriminating.

You clear your throat. “Sorry if I pulled you away from something important.”

Chan chuckles softly. “I was just in the gym with a few of the guys. Really, it was a saving grace getting your call. Binnie was going to start me on squats.”

“Binnie… that’s Changbin right?” You raise your eyebrows to him and he nods with a smile.

“Been doing your homework huh?” He seems genuinely proud of your recollection of his friend.

You give a little shrug. “Jeongin helped me out a lot. I know they are all important to you and I just don’t want to sound like a total idiot when I meet everyone else.”

There’s quiet for a moment and you feel as though you may have said something wrong. Then, as he takes a left turn around a corner he murmurs, “Yeah… about that.” Another pause and now you’re biting your lip nervously. “Some of the guys are at the house… now.”

Your eyes go wide as you turn to face him. Maybe you weren’t expecting to meet them all at once or maybe you are still battling the panic in your heart, either way you were not expecting to meet a bunch of famous idols tonight. “A-all of them?”

Chan squeezes your thigh gently but shakes his head. “No, not all of them. But I can kick them out. Seriously, I don't mind. It was just a last minute plan after working out earlier.”

You take a deep long breath. Maybe tonight had gone completely wrong. But hadn’t you been desperate for a distraction? “No no! It’s okay. I’m just, you know nervous I guess? I wish I would’ve dressed better or something.”

He takes the chance at a red light to look you up and down. You’re still in your work uniform minus your name tag. It’s just simple black leggings and a white button up top. “I think you look perfect.” He says softly, tearing his eyes away from your body.

The rest of the ride to his house you spend fixing your hair in the mirror and reapplying your favorite lip oil. When you arrive, Chan runs over to open your door for you and as you get out you decide to undo some of the buttons on your shirt. Not enough to be too revealing but just enough to not look like a nun. Chan catches this movement and quickly moves in front of you. You swear his eyes have darkened but you blame it on the lack of light around you.

“Before we go in there I just want you to know, some of the guys can be… a lot.” He’s watching you. “If anyone makes you feel uncomfortable, feel free to put them in their place. And you are always free to just hang out in the guest room too. Don’t think you have to stay with us the whole time.” You realize then, that he’s nervous which brings a smile to your face.

Carefully you reach your hand out and grab him. “Chan… It's okay. Just a bunch of friends hanging out right? Just pretend like I’m not even there.”

He scoffs and shakes his head. “Right…” Then he gives your hand a squeeze and guides you up the stairs and into his home to meet the guys.

Chapter Text

When you enter the house, the living room is empty but you can hear noise coming from the kitchen off to the left. You slip off your shoes as Chan shuts the door and announces your arrival. Then he grabs your hand and pulls you into the kitchen.

When you enter you see one man standing in front of the refrigerator and two more are sitting at the table. As you enter you immediately feel the heat of their gaze raking over you. You look up to Chan and he offers you an encouraging smile that warms your heart. ‘Just be normal.’ You think.

“I thought I heard you come in.” This, you assume from all your studying with Jeongin on all things SKZ, must be Felix. He has blonde hair that grazes his shoulders. His eyes fall to you standing slightly behind Chan. Immediately his eyes light up and he smiles at you and you're taken aback by the beauty of him. “And hello to you.” His voice, which caresses your skin, sends a shiver down your spine.

With a quick squeeze to Chan’s hand you move in front of him and closer to Felix. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Felix gives you a lopsided grin. “It’s nice to meet you too.” He reaches his hand out and pulls you into a hug. It surprises you but you give in and wrap your arms around him. Something about the hug feels freeing, like hugging a best friend or a lover. You can’t put your finger on it exactly but you could stay in his arms for a very long time and be perfectly content.

Then he’s pulled away as the two men who were sitting at the table walk over. The first one standing in front of you is Changbin. You’re embarrassed to admit that you notice his body first. He’s wearing a long sleeve athletic shirt that hugs his muscles. Your mouth goes a little dry at the sight of him. He clears his throat and draws your attention away from his torso.

“My eyes are up here.” He says with a sneer. You feel your face grow hot and as you start sputtering over your words in an apology he just brushes past you without another word, something dark in his eyes strikes you. Obviously being looked at in such a way by a complete stranger must rub him the wrong way and you feel thoroughly assumed for it.

This leaves you feeling flustered but you push that aside as you meet eyes with Seungmin. He gives you a little wave and a soft smile. Of the three men that you’ve met, you are most surprised by him. Jeongin spent so much time telling you so many details about Seungmin that you feel as if you know him in a way you don’t really know the other guys yet but you have to remind yourself, that to them, you’re just a girl crashing their movie night, nothing more. You return the gesture and then turn to Chan who has grabbed some snacks and started sitting them on the counter.

“Is Innie here?” You ask and each of the men around you besides Chan, all break into chuckles. You raise an eyebrow at them. “What?”

Changbin speaks first, flicking his eyes up and down your body which makes you squirm. “He’s upstairs in his room. I think he said to send you up there once you arrive.” He shrugs and leads the way out of the kitchen with Seungmin and Felix in tow. They are all still laughing as they leave.

Now you turn to Chan who is smirking at you. “You can go see him if you want. I’ll save a spot for you on the couch?” He walks past you with two bowls of snacks in hand. As he goes he places a kiss on your forehead.

You have always hated being on the outside of an inside joke, you assume they must know about the kiss you shared with Jeongin. Maybe you should feel embarrassed but you don’t think they are teasing you as much as they may be teasing Jeongin at that moment. Regardless, you walk out of the kitchen and turn to the stairs which face the opposite side of the sitting room where the guys have gathered on the couch.

“Nice ass..” you hear Changbin mutter to no one in particular as you make your way up the stairs and then you hear a smack and he yelps out in pain. You’re thankful that your back is to them because now you must be blushing all over.

Once you reach the door to Jeongin’s room you knock softly. After a few moments of waiting you do it again. You hear a muttered, “I’m coming.” And then seconds later the door opens and your mouth drops to the floor.

Jeongin is practically naked with only a towel wrapped around his waist. His body is still slightly glistening with water as if he just stepped out of the shower minutes ago. You both lock eyes together as you try so very hard not to allow your gaze to drift any lower than that. Then quickly you turn your head away. “Uh sorry… Binnie said… um… I just-“

“Hey,” he says, stopping your mumbling as he gently grips your chin, turning your gaze back to him. He has a slight tinge of pink on his cheeks as he speaks. “It’s good to see you. I thought I’d have a bit more time to clean up. Sorry..”

You nod dumbly. “Its good to see you too.” And maybe that triggers something in you as you allow yourself to really see him. Your eyes track down his neck down his body. While you were shocked by the strength of him yesterday, today you see exactly where it comes from. His arms, his chest, his abs, all finally chiseled. You trace the line of his waist down to the towel and slowly drag your eyes back up again to his face.

Where there may have been a slight tinge of embarrassment moments ago, now Jeongin stares at you with a look that causes your stomach to clinch. His breathing is heavy and his eyes are darkened with something you can only describe as desire.

“I’ll save you a seat… downstairs…” And just as you’re about to turn away, his arm reaches out and wraps around your waist pulling you inside his room. He shuts the door behind him and you find yourself pushed up against it within the next second.

Your chest is pressed against his as he stares down at you. Both of you stay that way for a moment just watching each other. In this moment you don’t feel the anxiousness of the night, the panic that has been just below the surface of your skin. You only feel affection for the man in front of you, whose touch soothes you to your core. This is exactly what you need, this is the distraction that you want at this moment. Your heart is hammering in your chest as you watch him check you over. He starts at your head, tracking down your face to your neck, then back up to your eyes. There’s a different look there now. Instead of the heated gaze you saw just moments ago, he stares at you with worry.

Carefully you reach your hand up to his face. Your fingers graze his furrowed brows and underneath his sad eyes. “Don’t look at me like that…” you whisper.

He groans and leans more into your touch. “Chan said there was something wrong. He wouldn't let me go with him… Are you-“

You cut him off by shaking your head. “Don’t, seriously do not ask. I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to think about it.”

Jeongin eyes you nervously. “I’m just worried about you.”
At this you close your eyes tight, the images of your attacker come swirling into your mind. “Don’t Jeongin… You can’t worry about me. You can’t… you shouldn't care.”

He pulls away from you at this, shaking his head in disbelief. “I can’t just stop caring.”

Fear builds inside of you. This is what you had wanted to avoid. This is why you made clear boundaries the other night. “Chan agreed. He said things could just be casual. Why can’t you do the same?”

He scoffs. “Oh yeah. Was it casual how he dropped everything tonight to rush to you. Casual how terrified we were when he got your call? I just want to know what happened. I want to know that you’re okay.”

There was a point in your life that you would’ve begged for someone to care. You used to spend every night praying that someone would check in on you. However, now you know why you don't pray anymore, after years of being alone any time someone would care, they always realized you were just too much to deal with. You bring along baggage and trauma. It rears its ugly head every time you decide to open yourself up. Though you trust him with everything in you, you also realize that you want to keep him safe and that means you must keep him at a distance. You look at Jeongin and sigh.

“Just… stop okay? Please. I can’t do this…” And with that you push him away from you enough so that you can pull open the door and, then you walk out, leaving him there, pain in his eyes.

Before making your way back down the stairs, you take a few deep breaths trying to push away the emotions that are clawing their way to the surface. Once you feel a bit more calm, you head down. The other guys have decided on some superhero movie. You feel slightly awkward walking around the couch and over to Chan feeling the eyes of the other guys on you. Maybe they had expected you to come down with Jeongin but either way you don’t make eye contact with anyone as you fold into the couch beside Chan and Changbin.

Chan presses play on the movie without a word to you but he does offer you his arm to lay on, which you do. The images on the screen blur together as you try so hard to stay focused on it and not on your conversation with Jeongin. He does end up joining you all after another 10 minutes. He sits opposite you beside Felix and you know exactly why that must be as you feel his gaze on you the entire time.

Half way through the movie the guys run out of snacks so you offer to go get some more. As you fill a bowl with more honey butter chips you hear someone enter the kitchen behind you. When you turn around, you’re shocked by Changbin.

“Oh sorry, I’m almost done grabbing the snacks. Do you need something?” You raise your eyebrows to him. He shrugs and leans up against the counter next to you. “I thought we could just talk for a minute, without Chan breathing down your neck.”

You nod to him and smile. “Sure, is everything okay?”
In the blink of an eye, his demeanor changes and he pounces on you. The bowl of chips has been removed from your hands and he grabs each of your wrists, pinning them on either side of your body as he moves himself in front of you. You gasp at the sudden movements and the pain in your wrists. You stare at him with your mouth slightly open, a question on your lips but he speaks first.

“I don’t care what Chan and Jeongin do in their free time. I don’t care what they do with you.” His voice is nearly a growl. The proximity of his body to yours, his hips pinning you to the counter, his breath warms your skin, you should feel scared or worried at least, but you just feel a thrill vibrating under your skin. “If they choose to ‘fall for you’ that's their issue.”

He grips your wrists even tighter causing a whimper to leave your lips. He groans at your noise and pushes himself closer, wedging your legs open with his knee and you feel him then, at first you deny it but he’s hard and you can feel him as he presses that hardness against your core. Immediately your cheeks grow hot at the effect you’ve had on him.

His voice is lower now as he leans his face in closer to your ear. “Whatever it is that you want with them, it better not end badly.” His lips are nearly pressed to your neck as he speaks.

Your eyes close as you lean slowly, mindlessly, into his lips that now press against you. He kisses the spot softly and then there's a sharp sting of pain as he nips you with his teeth. Just as quickly the pain is replaced with a soothing sensation as he flicks his tongue over the spot and sucks on the sensitive skin there. This causes you to whimper again this time longer as he continues to suck.

The moan that escapes his lips is heavenly especially as his dick twitches in his pants. Just as quickly as the moment started he has removed himself from you and the loss of contact elicits a whine from your lips. Changbin looks you up and down, irritation on his face as he grabs his hard dick through his pants adjusting himself.

Seeing him standing there in front of you and reflecting on the rollercoaster of emotions you just felt, from fear to confusion to undeniable pleasure. Changbin in just a few minutes with you has set the stage for exactly what you relationship could be. Where you would be shocked by this realization days ago, now you are not surprised in the slightest. From Chan to Innie, and now Changbin, they all have an undeniable hold on you. In this very moment he could ask you to drop down on his knees and finish him off and you absolutely would. But he doesn’t do that, he doesn’t even say another word as he grabs the bowl and walks back to the sitting room.

At some point wetness has pooled in your underwear and as you reach your hand up to the spot Changbin kissed you, you know it will absolutely leave a bruise. Thankfully you can just adjust your hair to cover it up but now you have your swirling thoughts to contend with and to your surprise and joy, they are no longer filled with images and replays of your attacker, all you are thinking of at this moment are the ways that these men will absolutely ruin you. And maybe part of you desires that more than you’d like to admit. It was obvious that Jeongin likes you, and that Chan would do anything for you. Chanbin was unexpected and though the intimidating situation with him was confusingly erotic, you cannot even imagine how or why you’ve found yourself attracted to 3 idols who seem to all have a connection with you as well.

Finally you build the confidence to walk back into the sitting room. Instead of heading back to your previous seat you slide onto the couch beside Felix and Seungmin. Felix gives a little clap of excitement while Seungmin scoots over more, giving you some space. You all watch through the rest of the movie without any more interruptions.

————————-

An hour later Seungmin and Felix have headed home and Jeongin back to his room without a single word to you all night. Chan and Changbin are still sitting on the couch as you offer to clean up dishes in the kitchen. Chan refuses saying you’re a guest but after enough insistence finally he gave in.

You’ve just dried the last bowl and you hear someone enter the kitchen from the sitting room. You spin around and look at Chan. “Changbin leave?” You say, trying to sound nonchalant. You’re not sure if it works at all as Chan walks to you.

“Yeah…” Chan’s glare on you is intense and even more so as he reaches his hand to you and places it on your waist. “I’m sorry about I.N. he’s just… passionate. But I’ll talk to him. I know you want things to be chill.”

You shrug and set down the dish cloth in your hands onto the counter. “It’s my fault really. This is all just confusing.” You think of Changbin and his kiss on your neck. “I’m just ready for a hot shower and sleep.”

He smiles at you. “As you wish. Why don’t you head on up and I’ll go grab your bag?” You nod at this and then start towards the stairs. He follows behind you and as you make it half way up he calls after you. “Binnie was right, you know? About your ass?”

You laugh and turn to him. “You boys have no decency.” And then you make your way the rest of the way up.

While you haven’t been shown to the guest room yet, you recall Chan saying it was across from Jeongin’s room so it doesn’t take long for you to get there. It’s the same size as the other bedrooms and much more bland. There’s a king size bed in the center of the back wall and a walk in closet. In the back left is a door that leads into a bathroom. The walls are bare and you’re reminded of your childhood home. Your father never put up any pictures or decorations; it was boring and dull.

You make your way into the bathroom, starting the water in the shower. You’re happy to see that the toiletries are fully stocked so you really didn’t need to bring much. Once you're naked you step into the water. At some point Chan knocks and lets you know your bag is on the bed and you thank him.

When you’re out and all dressed for bed in your favorite pair of pajamas, a silk pink set of shorts and a cropped tank top, you put your hair in a braid down your back and climb into the bed, then you pull over your phone. There are two notifications. The first is from Lia.

11:42pm Lia
Remember any time to call me. Idols or not I just want you safe.

12:56am You
I’m safe and sound in bed. (You send a picture of yourself with a little peace sign and smile.)

The next notification is from Chan.

12:44am Chan
Come to my room when you’re done?

Immediately you slip out of bed and towards the door to the guest room. When you step outside, facing Jeongin’s door, your heart aches. You want to go knock and beg for his forgiveness but you know that won’t help anything. So with a huff you turn and you’re walking down the hallway to Chan’s room nearest to the stairs. You knock gently and after a few moments Chan opens up. He’s fully dressed in his pajamas, a pair of black pants and a white t-shirt. He looks you over his mouth slightly ajar. His gaze lingers on your bare legs before making it back up to your eyes.

“Are you trying to give me a heart attack, look at you.” He bites his bottom lip as he reaches a hand out to you and twirls you around pulling you further into his room.

You let out a laugh. “You are dramatic to a fault Chan.”
He gives a shrug as he continues to look you over and his eyes stop on a spot on your neck. At first you’re confused by what may have caught his attention and then you gasp your hand flying to the spot where Changbin left his mark.

Chan’s eyes have darkened and his lips are slightly parted. “I told him to take it easy on you…”

“I’m sorry I should’ve-“

“Stop.” His voice is musky and his eyes snap back to you. “Stop apologizing. I told you… I don't think you understand the effect you have.” Your cheeks heat at his words. Maybe you should feel ashamed or feel like some whore for the way you have acted around now 3 of these idols. But something in the way Chan speaks on these things and the way he looks at you makes you feel like this is normal.

Despite having barely had one romantic partner and only a handful of intimate situations, it’s absolutely fine for you to feel this way for Chan and the other members. You wonder even if you could feel this way for all of them.

Chan drags his eyes away from you and walks over to the bed and beckons you to him. The sudden change in his mood has you anxiously shuffling your feet in his direction.

He pulls you into his lap and you lean your head onto his chest. “I talked to Innie while you were getting dressed. I think he’s really just embarrassed about everything. He’s… he’s never liked anyone the way he likes you…” You open your mouth to interrupt but the look he gives you has you shutting your mouth tightly. “I know you’re not ready to talk about whatever happened tonight and that's fine. But I want to make sure you have a restful night."

You scoff and shake your head, looking down at your hands. “Unlikely…”

Then his hand is trailing up your leg to your thigh and dangerously higher until his fingers settle inches away from your core. You suck in a breath at the closeness and your eyes shoot up to his. “Let me… let us help you. Please.” Just as you furrow your brows at his words you hear the door to his room open.

Jeongin is standing there, his hair tossed messily and his eyes trained on you. The look there causes your nipples to prickle through your silk shirt. Chan must notice because in your ear he groans and you begin to feel him harden underneath you.

“I don’t… I’ve never…” Chan’s hand continues its movement up your body. He slides it against the base of your stomach near the band of your shorts and then slowly he inches higher until he’s cupping the base of your breast. You tense in anticipation and then lock eyes with Jeongin who is now walking to you, his eyes on Chan’s hand under your shirt.

He bites his bottom lip as Chan begins to kiss your shoulder slowly. “If you don’t want this just say the word. We promise to be gentle. If you behave.” Your eyes flutter closed as Jeongin drops to his knees in front of you and Chan adjusts your body so that your legs are spread wide and your back is leaning onto his chest as you sit on the very edge of the bed.

Chan mumbles against your skin. “Tell us you want it.” His hand is now hovering over your nipple and you arch slightly desperate for his touch. Jeongin’s eyes are on you, he watches you from down on his knees like you are an answer to a prayer. Like you know he will worship your body. When you don’t reply Chan roughly pinches your nipple and you yelp at the shock of it. “Say it.” He demands in your ear.

You’re breathing harshly, all thought of trauma and nerves gone from your mind. All you can think about is the men around you. Chan now kneads your breast, easing off of the pain he inflicted, replacing it with pleasure. And Jeongin who has started to trail his fingers up and down your inner thigh. In this moment you don’t care that this is careless or that this is your first time with two men in this way. All you think about is the care they have shown you and you know that no matter how much you fight it you need this and they need you.

Chapter Text

“I want you, both of you.” It comes out as little more than a whisper but you know they heard you because as the words leave your mouth, they attack.

Jeongin moves in between your legs, his eyes never leaving yours. He begins to kiss your thighs trailing his tongue along the way as he makes his way to your shorts. Meanwhile Chan has placed his lips firmly to your neck, kissing and biting then licking and sucking in a rhythmic pattern that causes your eyes to close. When they do, Jeongin grabs your chin and turns your face down to him.

“Don’t you dare close your eyes. I want you to watch me.” There’s a fire in his eyes and a confidence that increases the wetness that's beginning to form in your panties. When you nod to him he gives you a smile that shows off his dimples. You think back to when you first met him in Chan’s car. How sweet and kind he had been. You know that part of him is still there but the man in front of you is full of nothing but hunger, and you’re his meal.

Chan lifts your body up slightly as Jeongin pulls down your shorts and your underwear in one go. As he does this Chan has lifted your arms and pulled off your lace top. Jeongin stands up and takes a step away from you as Chan rolls you over onto the bed and pulls your body so that you're in the center. He’s kneeling next to you as you look from him to Jeongin then Chan dips his head down to your chest slowly. He takes his time to lick the very tip of your nipple and a whimper leaves your lips. He smirks at this as he blows cool air onto it, causing the skin to tighten almost painfully. As Chan repeats the action Jeongin has crawled in between your legs, his face dangerously close to the folds of your skin. He wraps his arms around each of your legs pulling them further apart then he takes a single finger and runs it in between the lips of your pussy and the sensation has you bucking your hips to him.

“That’s my girl…” he groans. “It really didn’t take much to get you dripping for me.” He repeats the action again and again, it’s a slow caress that has you dying for him to give you more friction.

Above you Chan has finally taken your nipple into his mouth, his opposite hand on your other nipple and pulls and twists it in a way that brings tears to your eyes. The conflicting feelings of pain and pleasure have the nerves all over your body on edge. You’re breathing hard trying not to allow your eyes to drift from Jeongin but with each teasing pass of his fingers and pinch on your nipple from Chan you’re nearing your climax. There’s ringing in your ears as you throw your head back and your eyes shut tight.

All the stimulus stops at once. Chan has sat back up onto his knees and Jeongin is standing at the edge of the bed. The orgasm you were seconds away from having now feels only like an ache in your stomach. You lay there panting and naked and they each look at each other.

When your breathing calms, your eyes meet Jeongin’s “I’m sorry…”

He has a smirk on his face and he looks at you from top to bottom so slow that you squirm under his glare. “I’m going to go easy on you, because I know it can be hard to follow directions.” He grabs each of your ankles and pulls you down to the edge of the bed. “If it happens again.. I don't have any choice but to punish you.” Something about the threat, about the danger, has your body on fire. You’ve never understood how pain can cause so much pleasure, and part of you, the part that is absolutely obsessed with these men, wants to tryy re everything.

He drops back to his knees in front of you. “Watch me.” And then his tongue dips into you. You are ashamed to admit, it’s been a long time since you’ve been touched in any way intimately. Even more embarrassing that you have always played it very safe in sexual situations. Watching Jeongin, seeing how delicately he uses his tongue, you realize that there is so much you really don’t know.

Chan has leaned back down and is kissing a line down your neck and collarbones. Every so often his teeth nip at you and then he sucks on the spot. You know this will leave marks all over but you’re too consumed in their touch to care. As he continues his attack Jeongin, flicks his tongue against your clit and you moan out his name. He groans against you and then slowly you feel him pull away and replace his tongue with two fingers. They create a rhythmic pattern, circling around. He picks up speed, his eyes boring into you and you buck your hips to him. You can feel it coming again, that intense sensation low in your stomach. They both must notice as well because they share one glance at each other before Jeongin plunges his fingers into your pussy. He’s moving so quickly that your breathing catches. Chan has dove his head back down to your breasts and all the sucking and pinching is enough to send you over the edge.

“I-I can’t… I’m… I..” You can’t even form words, the pleasure is too much for you. Every inch of your body is on fire.

Jeongin is smiling at you as he pumps even faster, he dips his head down, flicking your clit with his tongue as his fingers abuse your pussy. Chan breaks away from your breast to look at you, fire in his eyes. He leans down to your ear, licking the sensitive spot there. “You’ve been a good girl. Now come for us.” And that is enough to send you spiraling. Your back arches impossibly high as your muscles tense and the sensation takes over. Jeongin has removed his fingers and is devouring you, licking and sucking and kissing. Chan squeezes your nipple roughly and you yelp out, the pain in the middle of the orgasm sending you to a new high. You’re grinding against Jeongin’s face and with the moan he gives, he must be enjoying the way your body has reacted to him.

Slowly you come down from that high. When your breathing slows, Jeongin stands and walks off to the bathroom. Chan pulls your body so that you’re laying on a pillow in the center of his bed. Your heart is still hammering and your thoughts are all over the place. Chan has situated you so that your head is buried in his neck. When Jeongin returns he crawls into bed on the opposite side of you, curling into your body. You all lay there that way for what seems like forever.

Against your back, Jeongin mumbles, “I hope you sleep well tonight.”

You don’t respond exactly, you offer a pleasant hum that radiates against Chan’s neck. Jeongin slips out of the bed leaving a kiss on your back and you whine in protest but Chan grabs your chin in his hand and forces you to look at him. “Go get yourself cleaned up and then come back to bed with me.”

You shake your head. “But… don’t you.. don’t either of you need to…” the words die in your throat and they both chuckle causing you to blush deeply. Maybe this whole experience, as eye opening and intense as it was, has shown you just how much you really don’t know.

Jeongin shakes his head and shrugs. “This was all for you love. Get cleaned up and then rest.” He kisses your temple gently, the sweet and gentle Innie back again. Then he turns and leaves Chan’s room. That sight causes your chest to ache but then you feel a sharp smack on your ass and your head turns to Chan who is eyeing you mischievously.

As you stand you roll your eyes at him and walk to his bathroom. When you switch on the light, your reflection in the mirror catches you off guard. You have bruises all over your neck and chest and while it’s surprising, you feel a thrill of excitement run through you. These men have marked you. There's a small part of you that is terrified by just how vulnerable you are with them, but the larger part of you is still riding in the most satisfying orgasm you've ever had. The rest of it, the questions, the worries, that can all wait.

When you’ve finished in the bathroom and head back to Chan’s bed he happily opens his arms for you. You make to grab your pajamas but he grips your wrists and pulls you into him. “Absolutely not. I have a strict naked policy in this bed.”

You look him up and down incredulously. “Well it must be once sided then?” You add every bit of sass you can into that question. He must take it as a challenge because then he stands and slips off each item of clothing one by one, never breaking eye contact with you. Then he’s standing there naked before you and you can’t help but gawk. Yes he’s muscular but as your eyes trail down those muscles to the V at the bottom of his stomach and then even further your heart stops as the size of him. When you were sitting on his lap earlier you had thought you must've been dreaming at just how large he felt against your ass but now, seeing it?

Your eyes trail back up his body until you reach his eyes. “Are you ready to sleep now baby girl?”

At that moment, you feel the urge to push him down against the bed and ride him until the sun comes up, but with a deep breath you nod and crawl into the bed. He crawls in after you and pulls your body so that your back is pressed to his chest. You feel him rubbing against your ass slightly as he adjusts your body. It’s not easy to ignore the way your body reacts to him, your core already starting to feel warm again, but you do decide sleep is a good idea and eventually, much quicker than normal, you drift away.

———————

You don’t dream that night. You don’t even wake immediately to your alarm which typically would have you bounding out of the bed instantly. The sound meshes into your dreamless sleep, coming and going rhythmically until it completely stops. At this you finally become aware of your surroundings, your head is laying in a plush pillow with a warm comforter covering your body. There’s an arm wrapped around your waist slowly tracing circles around the base of your stomach and you feel it then, you feel him behind you, his dick hard, rubbing slowly against your ass.

Your eyes fly open and you remember that you are in Chan’s room and all the memories of your time with him and Jeongin come flashing back to your memory. You must go stiff because Chan stops rubbing you.

“Good morning sweetheart.” He mumbles into your shoulder, kisses trailing the skin there.

There are a million thoughts spiraling through your head. You want to ask questions about what any of this means, you desperately want to take care of the erection that's still placed firmly against you, you want to just curl into his body and ignore your responsibilities for a few more hours. Ignore the worries, the stress, your job. ‘Oh shit.’ You think before reaching out and grabbing your phone sitting on the side table next to you.

Chan whines playfully at your absence but then pulls your body back into his as you scroll through your notifications. Luckily it’s still early so you have an hour to get ready and head out to work for the day. You also realize Lia texted you at some point last night replying to your selfie.

1:22am Lia

IS THAT A HICKEY

Oh God, you’d forgotten to cover up Changbin’s mark on you after your shower. You decide now is not the time to worry about it so you deflect the question and ask her how she slept before laying down the phone and twisting your body around so that you are facing Chan.

His eyes are on yours and he has a sleepy smile plastered on his face. You reach your hand up and brush a few hairs from this forehead. You trace down his eyebrows, under his eyes, nose and then his lips. His body shudders at your touch and you feel his dick twitch against you. He is simply gorgeous in every way and you wish you could stay here all day long, wrapped in his arms. But you can’t.

You sigh softly and worry finds its way to Chan's face. “What is it?”

“I have work in an ho-“ The look on his face startles you, your face furrowing in confusion. Where seconds ago had been a sleepy childlike happiness etched there, now his eyes are burning into yours and you feel yourself shrink under his glare.

“You’re kidding right?” Even his voice has changed from the musky deep growl of the morning to a more sharp tone.

You shake your head, his quick change in emotion feeling like whiplash. “Um no, Chan, I’m not kidding? I have to work…”

He scoffs at you and pulls away, sitting up in the bed. “I know you may not be ready to tell me exactly why you called me terrified last night, but lucky for you I was able to piece it all together.”

You swallow and sit up slowly in the bed, your eyes drifting away from him. “Chan…”

“He found you didn’t he? At your home. And now you’re careless enough to go to work today?” His words feel like a slap to the face. You’re blinking at him dumbly and he shakes his head at you standing and walking away to his closet.

As you watch him walk away you feel numb. After the night you had, it hadn't really crossed your mind to give him a full update on what happened at your apartment. You figured it would happen naturally at some point but knowing that he figured it all out is humbling. And he has a point, going to work knowing that strange man found where you live is ridiculous but you can’t just quit. You groan and rub your eyes, a migraine forming in your temples.

After waiting a few minutes for Chan’s return you decide to head back to the guest room. You grab your clothes off the floor and pull them back on. Then you walk out of Chan’s room and down the hall. When you get back to the guest room you slip open the door and close it softly behind you, to not wake Jeongin who is sleeping in the room across the hallway.

Once inside you walk to the bathroom and hop in the shower. As the water rushes over you, you contemplate the situation you’ve found yourself in. Taking a deep breath you think back to last night. To the memories that resurfaced and what they mean for you right now. When you spoke to the police they did say that they would be in contact if anything more happened. They are also the ones who suggested it wouldn’t be safe to stay at your apartment. You shut your eyes and pull your head under the water. The face of the man forces its way to the front of your thoughts. He has used your name, the name only a few people have ever called you, “Junie.” You want to burn the thought from your memory. The idea that this man must know you, or at least know of you terrifies you deeper than you care to admit. Does he know about your past? About what your dad did to you?

You’re hyperventilating now as you slide down to the floor of the shower and pull your knees to your chest. The water pounds against you as the deepest darkest memory comes to your mind.

You’re sitting in your childhood bedroom, curled up in a fetal position on your bed, your eyes are shut tight and the blanket is covering your entire body as you shake like a leaf. You can hear him, your father, open the door and call out to you. “Junie, Junie I need you.”

You start to cry now, trying hard to disappear. Maybe he’s drunk enough tonight that he won’t touch you. The floor creaks as he steps up to your bed and you hold your breath. And then he strips the blanket away from you and you see his face. The dark circles around his eyes, his teeth bared in frustration. “Don’t hide from me.” He spits out, and then he grabs you.

A loud bang on the bathroom door startles you out of your memory. You hear Jeongin calling out to you.

“Open the door!” He doesn’t sound angry, he just sounds desperate and you’re still panting trying to catch your breath as you push the shower door open. You quickly grab a towel, wrap it around your body and then step to the door just as he bangs on it again.

You lock eyes together and seeing that fear in his eyes leaves your knees weak. “I-I’m sorry.” You breathe out. Your chest is still rising and falling rapidly as he checks you over.

“What happened..?” His voice shakes as he speaks to you and then he pulls you into his arms, not caring at all that you are still dripping wet.

You don't respond and he doesn’t ask again as he pulls you out of the bathroom and into the guest room towards the bed. He’s rubbing your back with his palm and that helps to calm your breathing and the panic eventually subsides. When you finally stand and dry your body off, Jeongin politely turns his head as you dress and it brings a weak smile to your face.

“Was last night just a very vivid dream or did you forget that you’ve seen every inch of me?” Now dressed you sit beside him on the edge of the bed. His boyish smile sits on his face as he turns to you and pulls you into his lap. He kisses the top of your damp head as you curl into his body and sigh. “I’m ready… to talk.”

He doesn’t respond, he just nods and scoops you into his arms, carrying you out of the room and down to the couch on the main floor. Chan is there, fully dressed and fiddling on his laptop. He doesn’t look up when you both enter so Jeongin kicks at him to get his attention.

Chan sighs and then closes the laptop, before leaning back against the couch, his eyes looking everywhere but at you. You feel awkward, but you know that the men here in this room care for you, and at some point that has to be acknowledged.

You take a deep breath. “When I got home yesterday I saw him…” Now Chan’s eyes are glued on you, you look away to the floor. “He… came after me and chased me into my apartment.” You hear Jeongin suck in a sharp breath and he wraps his arm around you pulling you in close but he does not interrupt. Chan has moved to the edge of his seat and looks as if he will reach out to you. “I think he knows me. I think… he may be one of the men who…” You shut your eyes tight as the images try to flash through your mind. Your fathers abuse, the way he would hand you off to his friends, the first time child protective services came to your home and the moment he knew you had betrayed him.

Your eyes flick to Chan’s. “He’s an awful awful man. I think if he does ever get to me, he will kill me.”

Chapter Text

“Junie… I promise this won’t be like the last time.” Your father is standing outside of your room. You’ve locked the door which you know will get you in a lot of trouble but you’ll do anything for a break from him.

You’re sitting on the floor in the closet as he continues to plead for you to come unlock the door. He’s surprisingly gentle in the way he’s speaking to you which is never a good sign. He stays there for a long time before leaving and you know that won’t be the last of him but at least you can give yourself a few more minutes of peace before he returns. Your mom used to tell you to lock yourself in here when he was really drunk, which was almost all the time. One time he was throwing things all around the house. Your mother had been begging him to stop as you cried in her arms. Then you remember him charging at you both. Your mother stood up and blocked him from getting to you and you ran to your hiding spot. No one ever came to get you to come out so you decided to just stay there until the next morning for school.

———————-

You haven’t allowed a single tear to drop as you are determined to explain every detail to Chan and Jeongin before descending into a panic attack. You can feel it radiating just under your skin but with Jeongin rubbing circles on your back and Chan kneeling in front of you holding your hands, you are able to keep it at bay for now. Before beginning your life story, Chan had encouraged you to call out of work. It took a little extra convincing from Innie, but you decided it would be for the best. Then Chan ran into the kitchen and grabbed you a water before you began.

“It got worse after we moved to the states, after my mom died. He would have these friends over all the time and…” You take a deep breath and shrug. “I know he was just sad, grief does awful things to people.”

Chan squeezes your hands drawing your eyes to him. They have both taken care not to interrupt at all and you know they must have a million questions ready to burst from their lips.

Staring at the pity deep in his eyes will send you spiraling sooner than you would like. Your eyes flick away as you continue. “At first it was just this one guy that he would send to my room. But then he started sending each friend in turn.” Your voice cracks and you can feel Jeongin lay his head on your shoulder. “I don’t remember their faces. I just know that when I finally told my teacher about it and CPS came to our home, it all stopped.”

Everything stopped almost instantaneously that day. Almost. Your father had taken extra care to punish you in other ways. After that though, everything changed. He just stopped. Stopped eating, stopped working, stopped smiling. And it was all your fault.

“Stop.” Chan’s voice isn’t sharp, it's not angry. The word is a plea that has your eyes moving back to meet his. “This is all his fault. You… you did nothing to deserve any of that.”

You just blink at him, your mouth shut tight.

For the most part your story stops there. So you feel there is nothing more to add. Jeongin nuzzles your neck and mumbles. “I’m so sorry about last night.”

Shocked by the sudden change in subject you turn to him. “I-I… what?”

“I didn’t know. And I was so demanding and I’m sure that was difficult-“

“No no no. Stop. I had the best time last night. I… I haven’t… It’s been a very long time since I’ve even wanted to be with anyone.” He sits up to look at you. “It was perfect Innie.” A curve forms on his lips as he reaches his hand up to play with his ear. You notice he does this when he’s thinking but more often when he’s nervous. “I’ve been to years of therapy.” You look between the both of them. “I haven’t even thought about those things for a long time. It's just…”

Chan sighs. “It’s because of the attack. That guy.” You nod at him. A large part of you expected them to both run from you at some point during this story, to realize you are way more work than you’re worth especially with the amount of inexperience you have, but even when voicing that exact concern to them they made extra care to comfort and reassure you.

Now, having told your story and feeling utterly empty because of it you decide to switch gears. “This is all happening really fast for me. And really I don’t understand any of it.” You look between the two of them. “For whatever reason, I trust you both more than I have trusted almost anyone in my life. But what is this?” You shake your hands around gesturing at the three of you.

Chan moves from kneeling in front of you to the couch beside you, Jeongin still fiddling with his ear, shrugs.

“This is… new for both of us. We’ve never been with the same girl before. None of us have.” You think he must mean the Stray Kids as a group, so you nod. “We care for you. We are drawn to you. If you… you know, don’t mind it. We would like to both be with you.”

Your eyes drift away from him. You’d be stupid to say no of course, they have been your saviors in all of this, but to open yourself up would be to allow yourself to truly fall for them which you know is inevitable. This is what scares you, they have done so much for you in the few days you’ve known them, what happens when they leave? But you know there’s no way to stop this from happening now unless you were to leave.

“But what about your life…? You’re both idols. I can’t imagine this is a normal thing?” You furrow your eyebrows trying to draw all the limited K-Pop information you have to the forefront of your mind.

Chan nods to you. “We will have to keep things quiet or the media will tear us apart. But last night I was talking with Changbin..” Your face grows hot at the name thinking back to your intimate moment shared with him. And Chan must notice this as he smirks at you. “He was quite surprised by you as well.”

You roll your eyes and scoff. “Yeah as he was threatening me?”

Jeongin just laughs at this. “He’s just putting on a show. Binnie is a big baby.” You glance at him over your shoulder, his laugh absolutely infectious and bringing a smile to your lips.

“Bin offered the suggestion that you could step in as a Stray Kids assistant.” This draws your attention back to Chan. “I would pay you of course but that would allow you to also be around us more often without drawing too many eyes to us. And we would all be able to keep an eye on you too.”

You shake your head in confusion, disbelief oozing in your voice. “So I’d be your employee with benefits?” Both Chan and Jeongin laugh at this.

“In a way?” Chan raises an eyebrow and cocks his head to the side. “We have a dance rehearsal with the rest of the guys so we plan on introducing you to Hyunjin, Jisung, and Minho then. Everyone else agreed already. I guess you made a good impression last night.”

Your jaw drops in shock. “But… wait.” Your head is starting to spin. “I will work for all 8 of you…”

Jeongin’s hand has begun its circles around your back again as if he can sense the impending panic. You lean into his touch and take a deep breath. His voice is soft. “You can say no. We can adjust anything to what you need, we just want you to be safe.”

His words seem to steady you. It’s not as if you’re expected to form relationships with all of the members. When Chan explains a little more about what is expected of you, you realize it's not as overwhelming as you believed. Besides if all the guys are on the same page about you then how could you say no? At least until everything with your attacker blows over this could be the safest place for you.

After a few moments of silence as you process it all you finally nod and say, “Okay… I’ll do it.”

———————

You agree to go to rehearsal with the guys tonight to meet the rest of Stray Kids but you spend the majority of the day with Chan. Jeongin left early in the moving to meet with his vocal coach and then a few other meetings.

Chan works most of the day on his laptop. You can’t even begin to understand how he puts together so much music in such a short time but just as you're getting ready to head to rehearsal with him, he has played several new tracks for you.

When it’s time to go Chan walks you out to his car and you hop inside, nerves beginning to form under your skin. “So what are you rehearsing for?” You say trying not to allow the nervousness to show. You must do a poor job at it however because he reaches his hand over to you and places it on your thigh squeezing gently.

“We have a comeback soon so we have to get ready for the music shows.” He pulls out of his driveway and starts off down the road. “It’s just us guys today, trying to get as much practice in as possible so it shouldn’t be too overwhelming.”

You nod at this but begin to bite your lip softly. Eventually you lose yourself in your thoughts, drifting off and thinking about each of the guys in turn. You feel very comfortable with Jeongin and Chan obviously. Felix was really sweet with you and everything about him was warm and comforting. Seungmin was really hard to read but Jeongin has mentioned that he can just be a little closed off around new people and you don't blame him at all. Changbin is… well. You don't really know how to describe Changbin. He is the one who suggested this arrangement in the first place and despite his angry demeanor with you the other day in the kitchen, confusingly it had turned you on. And hadn’t he been the one to mark you first? You shake your head clearing those thoughts away.

So now you are to meet Hyunjin, Lee Know and Han. From everything Jeongin told you, Minho can be another wild card. And you can only hope Han and Hyunjin are as sweet as Innie said. You spent a lot of this morning pouring through each member’s social feeds and you feel as though you will never get over the absolute beauty of each of them.

Eventually you pull into the parking lot of a large building. Chan hops out and as you’ve become so accustomed to, he opens your door and lets you out as well. With a wide smile on his face he intertwines your fingers together and you take a deep breath.

“Hey.” He says grabbing your chin with his opposite hand and turning you to face him. His dimples are in full view and the way he looks at you draws a smile to your face. “They will love you, just like I do.” And before you can even draw a protest to your lips at the words, he pulls you into the building.

The space is huge with rooms all around. Chan points out the bathroom to you and then continues down a long hallway to a room towards the back with a large 3 on the door. He pushes it open and you realise the room must've been sound proof because noise comes at you at all angles.

There’s music blaring and the members are all bouncing and laughing around the room like a bunch of puppies. Within the room there is a large wooden floor, mirrors on all sides and in the far corner there is a small couch beside some folded chairs and a table. Hanging in each of the corners are speakers.

Jeongin must sense your presence because he whirls around and runs straight for you. You let out a strangled laugh as he lifts you into the air and spins you around in circles. When he finally sets you down after much coaxing from Chan, Felix is the next to grab you and while he is much more gentle with his hug, he does lift you off the floor. When Seungmin steps up you offer a little wave but he shocks you as he dips down and gives you a soft kiss on the cheek. Then when Changbin gives a dramatic “awwww” Seungmin spins around and starts chasing him around the room. Minho and Jisung step up next and you give a little bow to them before introducing yourself. Jisung just gawks, his eyes wide and his lips slightly open.

“She’s so cute.” He says a blush forming on your cheeks and then he’s also drawn you into a hug placing a kiss on the top of your head. “It’s so nice to put a face with the name. Right?” He shoves Minho towards you and now you’re all three in a forced bear hug from Han. To which both you and Minho can’t help but laugh.

When Han finally breaks the hug, Minho gives you a bow as well and then steps away. When he does, you lock eyes with Hyunjin. He’s standing with his hands in the pockets of his sweat pants as he steps to you with a smile on his face.

“H-Hi.” You stammer because you are totally in awe of the beauty of the man in front of you. Maybe it's the way he walks to you or the fact that everyone in the room has their eyes on the both of you now. Chan brushes past you with a kiss to your temple just as Hyunjin makes it to you. He stops inches away from you, his warm breath glazing over your skin.

“It’s nice to finally meet you. I’m Hyunjin.” He bows slightly and then grabs your hand bringing it to his lips. Is it crazy to think that a peck on the hand can be a sensual act? Probably. But that doesn't stop you from watching each second and feeling your stomach tighten at the contact.

Chan has stepped to the center of the room and pulled out his laptop. The majority of the other members have joined him except for Hyunjin. He nods his head in the direction of the couch. “You can sit there if you’d like.”

You nod like a bobble head and he grabs your hand walking you to the couch and then heading to the center of the room with the rest of the guys.

During the day with Chan you had asked him many questions about what exactly you would need to do as the assistant to the members and he really didn't have a lot of insight to offer. He just kept saying each member would have a private meeting with you to discuss your role. You take out your phone and begin taking a few notes of changes and questions that you have for the guys.

The rehearsal is mesmerizing. While you have seen many videos of the group perform. Seeing them rehearse is something so different. They way they cheer each other on and respectfully correct any wrong moves. It’s incredibly professional. Having spent the most time with Chan and Jeongin, you are drawn to them the most as they dance full out. You find yourself thinking back to last night and the way they touched and pleased you. When you realize your face must be as red as a tomato you quickly look down to your phone.

After a few hours of rehearsal, the time now shows 11pm and Chan calls you over to him as the guys begin to grab water. You stretch your legs out and walk over to Chan who is at the front of the practice room.

“I know most of you know this already but starting this week we have a new assistant.” Chan has his arm wrapped around your waist and as most of the members let out a cheer and clap he kisses the top of your head.

Then he nods to you and you shuffle forward smiling at everyone. Your eyes pass over each member who is smiling, then they stall at Changbin who has his arms crossed over his chest. He’s not exactly frowning at you but he does look at you like you’re some bug under his shoe. Chan must notice too because he leaves your side and goes to stand behind Changbin, he grips his shoulders firmly and Bin just looks up at him. They share a moment with their eyes locked as you begin to speak.

“I’m excited to be able to help you all. I have a degree in marketing and communications so I really hope I can do anything that you need from me.” You smile at Jeongin who gives you a supportive nod and now Chan has finally made his way back to you.

“So if you all need any extra help with things just give her a text.” And then he dismisses them, reminding them of rehearsals again tomorrow.

Each member steps to you and offers some kind of hug and congratulations. Jeongin to your surprise presses a kiss to your lips which you can’t help but return. Then you feel the eyes of the rest of the members on you as you turn away to grab your things off of the couch before the embarrassment eats you alive.

You hear someone step up behind you and when you turn to face them your heart skips a beat. It’s Hyunjin, standing very close to you, close enough that when you turn he is just an inch away from your nose. “I have a fitting tomorrow morning. Can you come help me out?” His head tilts lazily to the side as he looks down at you through his lashes.

You swallow as your eyes track down his face to his lips. They are slightly parted and so pink you feel the urge to lean forward just enough to feel them on your skin. Then to the left of you someone clears their throat and you jump back a step. Changbin is there and he looks you up and down.

The annoyed look from Hyunjin who steps over to him and wraps an arm around his shoulder brings a smile to your lips. Changbin seems to shrink under him.

“Be nice, Binnie.” Hyunjin reaches out and pinches Changbin in the cheek and he lets out a little groan.

For whatever reason this gives you a little confidence boost seeing how the other members love to tease each other. You turn to face him head on and cross your arms across your chest mimicking him. “Yeah Binnie.” Plastered with a look of smug indifference on your face you look back at Hyunjin who seems pleased as he bites his lip. “I’ll be there.”

Hyunjin smiles at you which causes your heart to flutter and then he dips down, places a kiss on your cheek and turns away to walk back to his bag. Changbin still stands there in front of you and now that it's just you and him you feel the confident facade you put on, begin to falter.

“If you’ll be over early in the morning I guess it would make the most sense for you to stay the night huh?” There's almost a teasing nature to the way he speaks to you and it causes you to stammer over your words.

“S-stay over?” You blink at him and he just shrugs.

“I mean, otherwise Chan would have to bring you. Don’t worry, I don’t mind sharing and neither does Chan and Innie apparently.” Your blood runs cold at his words as your head flicks over to Chan who is making his way to you with a look of concern in his face.

“What did you do now Changbin-hyung?” Chan gives him a playful push. You grab onto Chan’s arm, and notice Changbin eyes are still locked on yours, an eyebrow raised.

This is a challenge and he wants you to back down. You know Changbin isn't a bad guy. He’s a protector of his friends and you’re a stranger to him. To all of them. If you ever plan to break that barrier with him, you know you have to show him you refuse to back down. You care deeply for Chan and Jeongin and the other members are slowly growing on you as well. He wants to win and you refuse to give him the satisfaction.

“I’ll be staying with Changbin and Hyunjin tonight.” You say to Chan who turns you to him, his eyebrows raised.

“Are you… sure?” There’s a little worry there but you’re not exactly sure why. Hadn’t he wanted you to do this, to step in as the assistant? It was Changbin’s idea in the first place so why would he be worried.

Somehow Changbin understands the look on his face better than you do because he steps up to Chan and pulls him away from you, gripping your arm firmly but not painfully. “Channie, she’ll sleep in the guest room, Hyunjin will be there all night. Stop worrying, that man won’t just show up at our house.”

The words are sharp and at the mention of your attacker you realize that each of the members must now know at least a little about the arrangement you have with Chan. You understand that Chan is not nervous about you going home with Changbin and Hyunjin, but that you won’t be under his watchful eye tonight.

Changbin is now pulling you away from Chan and towards the exit of the practice room. Your eyes don’t leave Chan’s until you walk out the door and it closes shut behind you.

Chapter Text

When you step into the hallway you pull yourself from Changbin and walk as fast as you can away from him. You can feel his eyes on you as you stride straight for the door and out into the night air.

You cannot even begin to understand why you agreed to this situation. As Changbin finally catches up to you, there’s a feeling of pride that you can’t seem to shake. You are dying to prove something to this man, but as he stalks towards you his brows furrowed and his muscles puffed up, that pride seems to ebb away, replaced with doubt.

“Are you going to be a brat all night? Chan would kill me if I let you out of my sight.” He digs in his pocket for his car key.

You cross your arms and look up at the night sky. “You would probably like that I bet, dealing with a brat.” Again you feel his eyes on you and deny him the satisfaction of revealing to him the effect he has on your nerves. “Besides, I’m only going to your house for Hyunjin. Not you.”

Now you do turn to him and realize he's stepped even closer to you, where he is now looking at you from down his nose. “Of course. Just another member you have wrapped around your finger. Desperate to collect them all?” There’s a fire in his eyes that has you cowering under his gaze.

“Hey!” You turn your head quickly and see Hyunjin waving his hand at you. He’s in the driver seat of a black sleek car. “I heard you’re sleeping over. Can I give you a ride?” There’s something in the way he speaks that makes everything feel sensual, so when a shiver slides down your back, you’re not very surprised.

You flick your hair over your shoulder, trying hard to catch it on Changbin's face before bounding off towards the car. “I’d love one.” Quickly before Changbin can offer any sort of response you hop in the car.

Once you’re situated in your seat you take a deep breath. “You look like you’re going to shit yourself.” Hyunjin is staring at you chuckling softly.

“Shut up.” You say burying your face in your hands. “You are all a lot to deal with."

He reaches up to your hands and pulls them down, intertwining your fingers through his. “Thank you I think?” You know your face must be red right now with the embarrassment you’re feeling but you’re too busy looking at your fingers in Hyunjin’s hand to care. “He’s really not as bad as he seems.”

His comment draws your attention back to his face. He’s already pulled out of the parking lot and you’re driving now to what you can only assume is his apartment. “Innie said the same thing. I just don’t understand why he hates me.”

Hyunjin lets out a bark-like laugh that causes you to smile. You realize, yes this man is hot as hell, but more than that, he is full of joy and it radiates off of him. “With how long it took him the other night to stop talking about your ass I really don’t think he hates you sweetheart.”

Now again you feel the heat under your skin. “Yep, this is what I meant when I said you’re all a lot to deal with.” And then he’s laughing and you can’t help but join in.

Eventually you make it to Hyunjin’s house and as you reach to open your door, he groans and you spin your head to him. “What?”

“Let me do it for you.” He has the sweetest look on his face, his bottom lip slightly jutted out as if he were begging. You’re reminded of a puppy and you give him a nod. He smiles brightly and then half skips half runs over to your side of the car. In the most dramatic way possible he pulls the door open for you and offers a deep bow in your direction.

You decide to play along as well, stepping out of the car and giving him a bow and a kiss on the cheek. With a look of shocked excitement he places his hand against the cheek. “Wow.” And then you’re laughing deeply as begins to fan himself.

“Innie was right. You are so dramatic.” Hyunjin sighs and takes your hand into his as you make your way to the front door.

“You’re mine for the night pleaseeeee stop bringing up baby bread.” His voice is whiny but you can’t help but acknowledge the playfulness of the statement.

You raise your eyebrows at him incredulously. “I’m yours?”

“Of course. We both know you want it that way.” The way he looks you over has your heart hammering in your chest. There’s some truth to it. You would love to be his in a way. How could you not when he looks at you like he wants to tear your clothes off at any given second. You can’t simply admit that though, things are confusing enough with Innie and Chan.

Hyunjin unlocks the door with a smile, the tension in his eyes now replaced with a boyish expression. As you walk inside, you pinch his cheek playfully and he gives a smack to your ass that causes you to yelp in protest. Despite the intensity he throws at you randomly, it’s easy with him. The man you took note of while watching Stray Kids performances, is so very different from the one standing before you. Still confident, still handsome, but so much more playful and almost goofy. You love every aspect.

As you slip off your shoes at the door, Hyunjin asks if you’d like a tour and excitedly you nod your head yes. Again, he intertwines your fingers and leads the way. The house itself is only one floor compared to Jeongin and Chan place. The entry way has tall walls that are covered in artwork that absolutely takes your breath away. When you round the corner to the right you enter into the sitting room that has two couches sitting opposite each other and a large tv. The next rooms he points out are the kitchen and bathroom before heading down an opposite hallway towards several closed doors. The first on the left he says is Changbin’s. Then there are two rooms that he calls offices, another bathroom and at the very end of the hallway is his room.

He encourages you to take a look inside so you gently turn the doorknob and push the door open. A smell that reminds you of open pastures and freshwater falls hits you and it’s so soothing that you smile instantly. The room itself is neat and beautifully decorated with more paintings similar to the ones you noticed in the entry way. You’re immediately drawn to them as you enter the room, taking your time to look at each one closely. You lose yourself in the drawings and pictures before remembering that you are not alone in the room.

Hyunjin has left you to your own thoughts, having drifted away to his bed where he's perched on the edge watching you carefully. When you feel his gaze piercing you, you spin around. Your cheeks are warmed slightly as you walk over to sit beside him.

“Sorry, I could spend hours looking at all of these pictures.” You’re looking up at him and the way he cocks his head to the side and draws his bottom lip into with his teeth has your heart skipping a beat. His gaze starts to feel like a caress as it slides down your face and the rest of your body. Reaching out to his arm you shake him slightly. “Hey, my eyes are up here princess.” You say teasingly.

The smile this brings to his lips does nothing to help the undeniable tension so you press along. “Who’s the artist?” You ask standing and walking back to a particular painting of a vase hanging beside the closet.

Hyunjin lets out a laugh as he walks over to you and drapes an arm across your shoulder. “I am.”

Your head snaps in his direction. “You’re joking… you draw?” The excitement radiating off of you takes him by surprise as he pulls away and nods. “I do too! Well not anything like this but I love to draw.”

He looks as if he’s just won the lottery. “Yeah, Chan was right about you.”

Quirking an eyebrow up, you turn to face him. “Huh?”

The boyish grin on his face and the way he leans in close to your face, noses almost touching, causes your stomach to clench. “He said you were perfect, special."

You shake your head. “Do you all just go around chatting about me when I’m not around?” It’s not that you have a problem with it, it's just you have no clue what the boundaries are within this group of friends.

“Oh baby girl… we tell each other everything.” Hyunjin's smirk has your knees feeling uneasy. Now he walks past you towards what you can only assume is the bathroom. He motions you towards the door and you follow. Once inside the bathroom and walks to the bathtub and turns that on, adding a lavender scented bubble bath. Quietly you just watch as he moves along. When the bathtub is full and the water is turned off, he turns to you.

“Ready?” He walks over to you and grabs your hips, lifting you and sitting you up on the large marble sink. His arms placed on either side of you pinning you in place.

Every time you’ve looked at this man tonight you feel as if you're staring at some Greek god or a prince. From his jawline, to his eyebrows, the way his eyes shut slightly when he smiles and then the messy look of his hair. He quite literally takes your breath away. And now you’re sitting here with him in between your legs, his eyes grazing over you in the same intense way he looks at everything. You feel utterly vulnerable in a way that scares you.

As you blink at him, he quirks another smile and then steps away from you and out of the bathroom.

You let out a sigh that is a mixture of relief and desire. Sliding down the counter you step up to the bathtub and pull off your clothes before sliding in.

The bath is the perfect temperature and you feel relaxed in a way you haven’t in a while, in all honesty you can’t remember the last time you took a bath. You grab a sponge and as you're washing yourself it slowly starts to come back to you. A memory from a lifetime ago.

A week after your 10th birthday, your father went away for a work trip so for the first time it was only you at home. He hadn’t gone to the store before he left but had promised that someone would bring over dinner for you each day. It was day 3 of no food.

You had just gotten home from school and immediately went into your bathroom to wash the day away. After turning on the bathtub and watching it fill, you slipped inside and stayed there for what seemed like forever. Maybe you had drifted off to sleep, because a loud bang on your bathroom jolts you up from your restful state.

“Daddy?” You call, your voice barely more than a whisper because if it had been your father, you knew nothing good would come from it. Slowly the door creeps open and when the man walks around the corner your heart drops to your stomach and screams bellows out of you.

You’ve seen this man around before. He would come to your fathers house to play games and drink. He hadn’t been one who would touch you but he always had his eyes on you when you were around. “Oh little Junie.”

When you snap out of the memory, you’re panting and shaking, the water in the bath no longer warming you but feeling more like needles on your skin. Quickly you step out and grab a towel. When you are mostly dry besides your damp hair, you grab a plush white rob that is handing on a hook beside you and wrap that around your body. These memories have been coming steadily everyday. It scares you to think of some of these forgotten moments of your life.

With a huff you open the bathroom door and step out into Hyunjin’s room. When you glance around you don't see him anywhere but you do notice clothes laid out on the bed and can't help but grin when you realize they're his. A pair of boxer shorts and shirt that you’re sure will fall well past your knees. When you’re dressed you sit on the edge of his bed and pull out your phone, noticing several new notifications.

The first is from Lia who sent you 3 texts.

12:11am Lia
I can’t believe you actually quit 😭

12:11am Lia
I thought you were joking

12:11am Lia
Who are you and what did you do with my Junie.

12:22am You
G said I can come back when things call down. Relaxxxxx

The next set of notifications are from Chan

11:32pm Channie
Please tell me Hyunjin got you home safe…

11:42pm Channie
I hate when you don’t respond right away

11:51pm Channie
Call me.

You roll your eyes and pull the phone up to your ear. As normal he only lets it ring once before answering.

“You’re going to be the death of me.” He groans out, relief in his voice.

With a smile you croon, “Hello to you too, Oppa.” Carefully you turn the phone on speaker mode and place it on the bed as you reach up to your hair and begin to braid it down your back. When he doesn’t reply for a moment you speak again, “hello?”

“Oppa, huh?” You can practically hear the smirk on his lips.

At that moment, Hyunjin returns to the room also dressed in his pajamas and you smile and wave at him before gesturing to the phone. “Channie is checking in on me.”

You hear a scoff. “I’m not checking in on you. I just… I was…” You and Hyunjin break into a laugh. “Shut up.” Chan groans which only sends the two of you deeper into a laughing fit.

When the laughs finally die down Chan, who was waiting so patiently, speaks again. “I had Changbin come over and grab your things, are you about to go to sleep?”

Hyunjin reaches down and grabs the phone, you reach out in protest trying to take it back but he is much faster than you as he waltzes away with it. “Channie-hyung, I will take extra good care of our girl tonight, no need to worry.” Your stomach clenches at his words as he winks in your direction.

You can hear Chan roaring through the phone. “She needs rest. Please make sure she gets settled in the guest room.” His voice is stern which only makes Hyunjin’s smile more mischievous.

“Oh no. She’s staying in my bed. Goodnight Bangchan.” And Hyunjin hangs up the phone. Immediately it lights up again with another call from Chan but Hyunjin turns the phone off entirely and places it on the table beside his bed.

The look of smug satisfaction on Hyunjin’s face has laughs bursting out of you hard enough that you’ve curled up on the bed. Hearing the stress in Chan’s voice and the confidence in how Hyunjin shuts him down shows just another side of the playfulness in this group of men. Still struggling to get your laugh under control Hyunjin takes the chance to climb on top of you and begins tickling your sides. “You heard Chan, you need to rest!” He’s barely placing any weight on you so you’re able to slip from under him and roll your body to where he is now laying under you and you’re sitting up straddling his lap.

The silliness is gone in an instant as Hyunjin grabs your wrist and pulls you down so that you’re chest to chest with him. His eyes search yours, feeling as though he’s reading into your innermost thoughts. You wonder if he can feel how hard your heart is beating at the closeness of your bodies. You watch him as he slowly licks his bottom lip. And then as quickly as this started Hyunjin moves you off of him.

Now you’re both laying on either side of the bed just staring up at the ceiling. The quiet isn’t awkward at all, it's just steady. After a few moments Hyunjin whispers goodnight to you, leaning over to turn off the lamp beside the bed. You turn over as well, slipping underneath the comforter but sleep doesn’t come to you as quickly as you’d like. You stay up thinking only of the man laying in bed with you.

Chapter Text

Sleep has never been something that comes easily for you and even laying in Hyunjin’s bed is no exception, it has absolutely escaped you. There’s several feet of space between the two of you and you don’t think he would mind all that much if you moved in closer to his body to seek some sort of comfort. You also know that he has a very early morning ahead of him, so rather than bugging him with your racing thoughts, you slip out of bed and head out of his room.

The house is absolutely dark and quiet so you take extra care as you tip toe past Changbin’s door and out to the kitchen. After rummaging around for a few moments you find the kettle and start making yourself some tea. When it’s all set up on the stove you move around to the table in the corner, beside a large bay window and sit down, pulling out your phone.

1:12am You
Are you awake??

1:14am Lia
Just got home. Everything okay?

1:14am You
Can’t sleep 🥲

1:15am Lia
Can any of your boyfriends help out? 😏

1:15am You
LIA. 1. Not my boyfriends 2. Grosssssss

1:15am Lia
Not your boyfriends?? In that case are you busy tomorrow?? Min-jun has been asking about you

As you furrow your eyebrows you glance out of the window. It’s been almost a week since you’ve heard from Min-jun. After the attack you were supposed to meet up to help him study but obviously you cancelled when you got your concussion. He’s been a good friend to you since Lia introduced you both, occasionally you would go out for drinks and sure in the heat of the moment you'd share a kiss or two… But now he's asking to see you?

1:17am You
What does he want?

1:17am Lia
You obviously.

1:17am Lia
So lunch tomorrow? I’ll bring Jeonyun and we can make a double date!!

1:19am Lia
You better say yes. I miss you and you can’t just stay around those guys 24/7

1:22am You
Fine.

Despite the clench in your stomach at the thought of leaving the protective boundary around the guys, you know she's right. You can’t stay hidden away forever and besides going out to lunch in broad daylight with Lia would be extremely safe. Although part of you wonders why you’d agree to anything she would call a date especially with the feelings you have developed for Chan, Jeongin and now even Hyunjin. Sure things aren’t exclusive and probably never will be but it’s conflicting all the same.

For a while you lose yourself in your thoughts, this web you’ve found yourself trapped in. The night outside is clear, and you can make out a few constellations that you remember your mom pointing out to you when you were very little. You’re so consumed in the stars up in the sky and your thoughts that you don’t even notice the eyes on you from the entryway of the kitchen until he clears his throat.

Your head snaps over to Changbin who is leaning up against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. He's wearing black sweatpants and a dark grey muscle tank. The way he’s standing has his arms and chest muscles puffed out and leave your mouth dry, but the pride and annoyance that floods you at the sight of him has you puffing out an annoyed sigh.

When your eyes lock on his, you put all the confident indifference you can into your words. “Can I help you?”

The sneer on his face and the way he scoffs at you, has your nerves vibrating under your skin in anticipation. He drops his arms and crosses the kitchen all the way to the table where you are still sitting. When he finally makes it to you, he places an arm on either side of you and leans over until he is close enough that his breath hits your face. It takes everything in you not to lean in closer as you smell peppermint.

“Princess, you’re in my house.” His voice is low and musky as if he hasn’t spoken in a while. There’s a challenge there, deep in the fire in his eyes. Every encounter you’ve had with him he continues pushing on your boundaries. As much as Jeongin and Hyunjin try to speak so highly of the man standing over you asserting his dominance, you cannot see past the hatred that overflows from him when he looks at you. It’s so intense that you want to run from it all yet there’s something that draws you to him as well. At some point you know Changbin will reach a boiling point with you, and you’re terrified and exhilarated of what that may look like. Now, however, you don’t care about that. You just refuse to be talked down to.

With all the confidence you can muster, you stare up into his eyes, mirroring the look of disdain there. “Your house huh? Wow, I had no idea.”

He shakes his head slowly at you. “Are you such a brat with Chan? With Jeongin?”

This causes you to roll your eyes. “Please. If they had any issues with me they know exactly how to handle it.” You lean in closer to him, a smirk playing on your lips. You know you’re in dangerous territory, and maybe it’s that thrill that pushes you to keep going. “You, on the other hand, just like to complain about it.”

As if in slow motion you see his pupils grow darker as he pulls his bottom lip into his teeth. “You’re trying to tell me that Chan and Innie have put you in your place?”

Innocently you bat your eyes up at him. “Oh yes.” You reach your hand up to the neck of your shirt and teasingly you pull it down so that he has a full view of your chest, just above your breasts. There he has access to see just how Chan had used his mouth on your body, hickey’s still covering you from last night’s attack.

“Baby girl…” His voice is impossibly deep as he reaches out a finger and traces the spots lazily. “If that’s what you call punishment, I have my work cut out for me.” Leaning in closer to your body you feel the heat of him and your eyes flutter closed. “Better not forget who marked you first. Or I’ll need to remind you.” Just then the kettles make a sharp noise and he pulls away from you. “Get your tea and then get your ass to sleep.” And then he leaves the kitchen without another word. Your hand lifts to your neck, to the spot where Changbin pressed his lips to you the other night and you feel heat radiate through your body right down to your core.

——————-

Eventually you get a few hours of surprisingly restful sleep. When morning finally comes you are up early, cooking breakfast while Hyunjin takes a shower. For the most part you try to stay out of the way during his fitting, only stepping in when asked specifically to grab something and as always taking any candid pictures you can for him. You’re surprised at how often Hyunjin asks for your opinion of the clothing, he does look amazing in every piece but you try your best to help him choose specific items that you love.

Changbin doesn’t show his face all morning and with the time you spent with him last night, you’re grateful for that. Around noon Hyunjin lets you know that he has a voice lesson to get to and he offers to bring you along.

“Actually I am going to meet up with Lia for lunch today. But I’ll see you at rehearsal later?” The look he gives you has your stomach in knots. He doesn’t look mad, but he definitely seems concerned.

“What..?” As if on instinct you feel anxiety clawing at your skin. “It’s just… are you going alone? How are you getting there? Is anyone else going to be with you?” Hyunjin moves in closer to where you’re standing in the kitchen and similarly to last night, he lifts you by the waist and sits you up on the counter.

His eyes are focused on you, and nervously you glance away from him. “Hyunjin…” You know that the guys have some kind of agreement going on when it comes to you. Chan said they all agreed to keep an eye on you but like Lia said, you simply can’t stay around them 24/7. “It’s just Lia and I, we’re going to meet with her boyfriend and another friend of ours.” Maybe it would be better to be upfront about Minjun. For the life of you, you can’t understand why it's even necessary to skate around the subject, he's just a friend like any of the other guys but maybe the idea of the “date” is weighing on you. Why you decide not to give those specific details, you don't really know, it’s not like you owe him or any of the other members those details.

The intensity in his eyes increases. “No way.” Now you do sense some anger there as he grips the sides on the counter on either side of your hips. “I’m canceling my lesson and coming with you.”

You scoff in protest. “No you’re not!” Your eyes are drawn back to him. “These are my friends. I trust them.”

He backs away from you shaking his head as he puts his hands into the pockets of his black sweats. “No. Fucking. Way.” The playful man you know is long gone, replaced by someone harder, sharper.

Your voice is a whisper as you reach out to him. “Hyunjin… It’s not -“

He cuts you off with a sharp tone. “It IS a bid deal.” His voice is strained as if he's holding something in and you can’t quite identify what. “You’ve been with one of us every second since it happened. And now you just want to go off with people we don’t even know?”

You blink at him. Your heart rate increasing.

Maybe he senses the panic in you because something in his gaze changes. The harsh lines are gone, replaced with a softness that causes you to look away. “This is careless. We just want to keep you safe.”

You can’t reply to that, you can’t even look at him. The silence sits with you for a while before Hyunjin steps back in between your legs and lifts your chin gently. “In the last week, he’s come for you twice. Please…”

This is too much for you. At first it seemed like a great idea, being with the guys to keep you safe, but you’re desperate for space. You’re beginning to feel claustrophobic with the intensity from Hyunjin. You’ve never done well when you feel cornered and that’s exactly how this conversation has made you feel.

Outside of the kitchen you hear a door open and close and then you look up. Changbin has strode into the kitchen and looks at you with disgust as he moves to the refrigerator. “What did she do now?” His voice is cold, distant.

“She’s going to meet up with friends for lunch. Alone.” Hyunjin is still pressed close to you as he speaks, your chin in his hand.

Changbin steps over to your left side. His face indifferent. “Flirting with danger princess?” He turns his gaze to Hyunjin, “I’ll make sure he gets there okay. You go to your lesson.” They stare at each other for a moment, unspoken words seem to pass as Hyunjin places a kiss on your forehead and then steps away.

“Be safe.” His eyes bore into you, it's not a command, it’s a plea and all you can is nod in response.

Finally he leaves the kitchen and after a few moments you hear the front door close. You sit there on the counter for another moment processing. How have you gotten yourself into this predicament where these men care so deeply about you that you can sense the fear inside of them. You’re not used to this kind of attention, on one hand you can appreciate the care that they have for you, a girl that they barely know. On the other hand, you can’t stand the idea that they would put their lives on the line for you, that they feel the need to protect you in all situations, that they’re willing to consistently cancel meetings or other plans just to ensure your safety. You close your eyes and throw your head back. A groan leaving your lips.

“Are you ready princess?” Changbin’s voice is overly sweet as he steps in front of you. You roll your eyes at him as you slide off the counter and step up to him, staring him down.

The last thing you wanted out of this situation was more time with Changbin but it looks like you have no choice in the matter. “You can sit in the car while I eat. The last thing I need is a piece of meat breathing down my neck.” The words are like venom from your mouth yet he does nothing but smirk as he follows you out of the house and to his car.

———————-

As you imagined, Changbin did not stay in the car. He followed you into the cafe and sat at a table a few rows away with his baseball cap and a mask hiding the majority of his face. That didn’t stop you from noticing that his eyes never left your body the entire time you ate with your friends.

Lia noticed halfway through lunch as she leaned over and placed her hand on your elbow. “It seems a little excessive to have a security detail.” She nods her head in the direction of Changbin. Unfortunately with the intensity of his gaze you haven’t been able to fully enjoy yourself. Minjun, who’s sitting across from you has tried several times to make conversation though your answers have been short and detached.

“He’s… a lot.” You mumble.

She offers a soft smile and nudges you. “Loosen up sweetie. Let him handle the sulking.”

You nod and really do try to have a good time. Eventually you lose yourself in conversation with Minjun who tells you all about his finals. Apparently he struggled pretty badly without your help.

“But you can make it up to me somehow I’m sure.” His hand under the table has found your knee and he brushes it softly with his thumb. Your cheeks heat at the touch but you don’t move. Throughout lunch he’s progressively gotten more touchy, brushing your knuckles with his fingers when passing a plate to you, nudging your foot with his when laughing at a joke. He even reached over the table to push a hair from your forehead. You try your best not to read into it much but you also aren't trying to avoid it or draw any lines with him, ‘it's all fun and innocent anyway… right?’ You think.

However now with the closeness of his hand on your knee your heart does pick up speed as your eyes flick towards Changbin. His eyes are like daggers as he stares at the hand on your leg. Maybe that would be enough for you to shift your leg away from Minjun but something in you, that stubbornness that only Changbin ignites, has you reaching your hand out to him under the table. You brush your fingers over his and when your eyes meet across the table, there's a fire in his pupils that makes your breath catch. Minjun has never made it expressly clear how he’s felt about you. Though you’ve both been friends for a while this is really the first time that you feel as though he’s seeing past your friendship. It’s not that you don’t like this either, he’s tall and muscular. He is one of the funniest people you know and he’s sweet as well. But the look there in his eyes makes something very clear, this was much more of a date than you realized.

When lunch is over and you stand to leave, Minjun is right at your side. “It was really great seeing you.” You feel his hand drop to your lower back as he guides you out of the cafe and out to the street. “Can I take you out for drinks sometime?”

At that moment you feel someone’s tight grip on your wrist as you’re yanked away from Minjun. “Hey what the f-“ As you turn you make eye contact with Changbin who looks as if he is ready to punch a wall. But his eyes aren't on you, that anger and fire is directed at Minjun.

“We’re leaving. Now.” Still he doesn't look at you. You glance between him and Minjun. Where Changbin is furious, Minjun looks playfully curious.

“I don’t think she wants to go with you.” Minjun’s voice oozes a confidence that has your stomach in knots. At this, Changbin positions himself in between the two of you and even though Minjun is several inches taller than him his presence is overpowering.

You look around desperately for Lia and realize she must still be in the cafe, however there are several other people who seem to be checking in on what the commotion is. “Guys… stop.” Your voice is low as you feel that panic building inside of you. All the eyes tracking you in the middle of the sidewalk makes your knees feel weak.

Minjun turns and puffs up his chest which reminds you of a rooster asserting their dominance. Changbin drops your wrist and when you glance down you see his hands are balled up into fists at his sides. And now your breathing is starting to get erratic. The stare down seems to raise the temperature around the three of you. You know you need to get away from this or you may have a panic attack right here in the middle of the street.

“Binnie…” You breathe out, reaching for his fist. At the sound of his name and the touch on his hand, he snaps his head to you. After a second glance his entire body softens and he grips your hand gently.

Then he leads you off to his car. You glance back at Minjun whose mouth is slightly open with his brows furrowed in confusion, maybe even a little hurt? You don’t have time or energy to process this as you grip your heart begging to keep the panic at bay.

Changbin takes care to open the door for you and closes it once you are in and buckled. Then he quickly gets in the driver's side and turns to you. “Take a deep breath. It’s going to be okay.” He reaches his hands out to you. One landing on your thigh and the other on your cheek. You shut your eyes and lean immediately into his touch as you focus on deep, slow breaths. After a moment your eyes flicker open again and you meet his gaze. For the first time you really look at him, all of his features. You take in the entirety of this man before you who has only ever looked at you with anger but who now looks at you as if the worst thing in the world is seeing you in pain. In this moment you see it, what everyone has been telling you about him. You see a glimpse of the real Changbin.

Chapter Text

You don’t speak with Changbin again for the rest of the evening. Honestly you feel very conflicted about the entire situation. Realistically its your fault, you were only flirting with Minjun to get a rise out of Changbin and that’s exactly what happened. How he reacted after, when you were starting to panic, that was a gentler side of him than you’ve yet to see but really it doesn’t change anything. Right?

You spend the rest of the afternoon avoiding him until you have no choice but to hop in his car again to head to rehearsal. Before you can dive out of the car to get away from the intensity that surrounds Changbin he grips your wrist and your eyes jerk up to him. “Don’t think you’re off the hook after what happened this afternoon.” You refuse to respond as you yank your hand away from him and practically throw yourself out of the car. When your door flies open and Felix is on the other side it takes you by surprise.

“Lix!” Your eyes grow wide at his bubblegum pink hair color. “Oh my god… You look so good!”

Excitement flares in his eyes as he reaches for you and pulls you into a hug. “Thank you, sweetheart.” As usual with Felix, you feel yourself melt into his body, soaking in his touch until you feel as light as a feather. When he does finally pull away you’re displeased and end up pulling his arms so that he wraps it around your waist. He hums happily as he rubs your side softly. The touch sends a chill through your body.

At some point Changbin must’ve left you to go into the building because when you glance around for him, he’s nowhere to be seen. This realization causes you to pause as you glance up at Felix who, to your surprise, is also staring at you too. You don’t look away, you just take him in. The soft lines of his cheeks, the freckles that make your heart ache. Everything about him radiates warmth and you are drawn to it, to him.

There’s a look in his eyes that draws you closer to him, like he’s beckoning you without using any words. You stay that way for a moment before his words come out as a whisper against your face. “Can I take you to breakfast tomorrow?”

If nodding like a bobble head was an Olympic sport you feel you would get the gold because you’re absolutely so enthusiastic in your agreement that he starts to laugh. The sound is heavenly and causes you to move closer into his chest as it rumbles through him.

After the both of you make it inside, catching up as you walk into the rehearsal room, a yell catches you completely off guard and then you feel the wind knocked out of you as Jeongin picks you up, swinging your body around dizzily. You let out a squeal that sends your face flaming in embarrassment.

“Innie please!” You’re not sure if the words are even intelligible with the way your body is being swung around.

Finally he places you down and you feel the entire room go wonky as you try to catch your bearings. You’re holding your arms out at your sides and both Felix and Jeongin are gripping you and laughing at you stumbling around helplessly.

Once the world is back right side up and Felix has moved on to greet the other members, Jeongin grabs your hands in his and walks you over to the couch in the corner. You set down your bag and he plops down, pulling you right into his lap. “Please say you’ll stay with me tonight? I miss you.” You can’t help the skip that your heart gives at the words. You have missed him too. The last time you spent with him was when you, Joengin, and Chan we wrapped up together in Chan’s bed. Even though you hate to admit it, you are craving his touch again. Not necessarily in the same way, though you wouldn’t complain at all, you just know that Innie’s touch is comforting to you, like a drug you just can’t get enough of.

“Of course, Innie. I’m all yours.” The way Jeongin bites his lip at your response has butterflies flying all around your stomach. The look in his eyes is dark and knowing.

His voice is low as he dips his head downward. “All mine baby girl?” There's almost a growl there as he leans closer and closer, his lips now barely grazing yours. “You shouldn’t say things like that to me…”

Your face and neck heat at the closeness and when your eyes flutter closed, he presses into your lips. It’s gentle, a sweet caress, but damn, it leaves your core tight. Jeongin’s hand finds your lower back, pulling you more firmly into his body, and you’re shocked when his fingers dip lower and cup your ass briefly. The kiss is brief and when he finally pulls away you realize the entire room is silent and all eyes are on the two of you. Jeongin is unphased, besides a tinge of pink in his cheeks, as he trails his finger up and down your side.

Chan who is standing furthest away, has a smirk on his face with his arms crossed over his chest. “Cute.” He starts walking towards the two of you, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Hi Chan” You’re very obviously breathless from the kiss and your voice cracks some as you feel the wait of every pair of eyes trained on you.

When he finally makes it to you he cocks his head lazily to the side, his eyes trailing up your body. “You can be his tonight.” There’s a darkness in his eyes that you’re becoming all too familiar with. “But we know you’ll be in my bed again sooner than later.”

Jeongin laughs his hand squeezing your hip softly as he slips you off of his lap and onto the couch, then he steps away and finds a spot on the floor to stretch. “Okay hyung, we get it, you’re jealous.” There's a playful smile on his lips. “I mean, if she’s up to it, we can always share again.”

Your heart absolutely drops as your eyes dart between the two of them. “Guys!” Your voice is an embarrassingly high pitched sound that removes any chance of the other members seeing your response as anything other than guilty.

To your surprise it’s Hyunjin who speaks up next. “Get in line Chan. She knows I’m patiently waiting.” He’s not smiling but his gaze on you is so strong that you feel as though he’s mentally passing the message along. He wants you.

The boldness of the men around you has absolutely thrown you for a loop tonight. You open your mouth to respond but there’s nothing to say. The eyes on you from all over the room begin to feel overwhelming in a way that has you squirming in your seat. You glance around for something, anything to ground you. Instead your eyes lock with Felix who is leaning up against the mirrored wall. The way his eyes roam your body as his tongue flicks out to wet his lips sends your stomach fluttering. It’s as if he is imagining how breakfast tomorrow will end.

Sitting on the floor beside him is Seungmin who’s expression is much calmer but the glint in his eyes gives him away. He's studying you, every inch of your body being tucked away into his memory. It's the kind of look that reminds you of a lion meticulously tracking its prey, calculating. The look has you pressing your thighs tighter together without thinking about it.

Han is next squatting beside Hyunjin in the middle of the floor. He’s been unusually quiet. Where he would usually insert a joke he now sits staring you down with the slightest smirk on his lips. When he notices you watching he lets down a chuckle. It’s a sound that rumbles through your bones. Low, dark, and dangerous.

Your breath pitches as you glance at Minho. He stands just a few feet apart from the others, his hands in his pockets but the weight of his gaze pins you to the couch like a physical force. The tension in his jaw and his eyes slowly raking over your body makes your chest tighten.

You hear Chan beside you, closer than he was moments ago. “You sit there all sweet and quiet but I know you love this attention. You want all of our attention don’t you?” He doesn’t whisper this. He boldly professes what you have been so scared to admit to yourself. With a sweeping glance around the room you think each member is waiting for your response. Maybe this is the moment that you hadn’t realized you’d been waiting for. The recognition that you aren’t afraid to open up whatever bizarre relationship you have with Chan and Jeongin up just a bit more. It’s clear that they don’t have an issue with it, in fact with the way they pass glance between each other you think they probably have discussed this possibility amongst the group already. Maybe they are just waiting for the okay from you.

In a way, this could cause so many more issues for you. Opening your heart up even more, but slowly, it's been happening on its own anyway. You’ve spent your entire life worried about being wanted, maybe this is the payout after years of abuse and self hatred. You push aside the worry of it all and take in each of the men scattered around the rehearsal room, they each look eager. Even Changbin, who you’ve avoided looking at since you arrived, seems like he’s waiting for some response.

You glance up at Chan who is eyeing you curiously. “I do…” Your voice is resolute. “I want it all.”

The smirk on his lips and the way he grips your chin with just a small twinge of pain has you feeling a wetness in your underwear. When he jerks your head up to him and places a strong kiss to your lips, you even let out the smallest whine. He draws back and mumbles “Good girl.” Before he drops your chin and walks away calling everyone’s attention to him as rehearsal begins.

The rehearsal flies by without any incident however everytime you glance at a member your stomach turns with anticipation. Despite the normal atmosphere of the room tonight, the guys being their normal playful selves, you feel a tension humming under your skin so by the time everyone starts to pack up to leave, your mind is exhausted but your body is wired. You catch Jeongin’s eye from across the room and he jerks his head towards the door, wordlessly encouraging you to come with him. You melt under his eyes, he makes you feel seen in a way that feels like home.

As you slide your laptop into your bag and zip it closed you feel a shift in the air around you that makes your hands go still.

“Leaving so soon?” Changbin's voice is a low grumble, calm and steady.

Slowly you turn to him pulling your bag over your shoulder. “Chan is working late with you and Han on music and Jeongin’s waiting…” His posture is relaxed but his jaw is tight and his eyes spark with irritation and something… deeper.

He takes a single step closer to you with a cold smile on his lips. Where earlier you could finally see the warm Changbin the other members had told you about, now he is long gone and the one before you, the one who loves to watch your squirm, has returned. “You think I don’t know what you were doing earlier at lunch? Teasing me? Testing me? You’ll learn not to play with me princess.” The words came out like venom on his tongue as he reaches out and twirls a lock of your hair around his finger.

After a few painful minutes of silence he leans into you, right beside your ear. “Chan will be hearing about your little stunt. We will deal with you later.” His voice is sharp and cold as he pulls away from you. “Go.” He dismisses you without another word and obediently you hurry away towards Jeongin, Changbin’s threat spiraling in your mind.

—————-

The ride back to the dorm is quiet as you listen to the hum of the car around you. Changbin’s words linger with you… ‘we will deal with you later’. You’re not scared necessarily. After today at the cafe you know Changbin isn't interested in hurting you and you know Chan couldn’t possibly do anything to harm you. Yet the thought of them punishing you circulates in your mind.

“Are you with me? Or off in dreamland?” Jeongin’s voice pulls you back to reality and you snap your head to him. He has that boyish grin on his face that displays his dimples perfectly and has your heart skipping several beats. He doesn’t press you for details but as you continue the drive he glances at you frequently as if checking to see if you’re still there.

When you arrive at the dorm you immediately find a spot on the couch and pull a pillow into you holding it firmly. Jeongin follows you over and plops down beside you. “Talk to me… please.”

With a sigh, you lean over and lay your head into his lap, mindlessly he begins playing with your hair, his opposite hand drifting down to rest on your stomach. His touch is just what you need as it draws the response out of you. “Tonight was… intense. I still don’t know what to make of it all.”

A wry smile tugs at Jeongin’s lips as he nods. “Yes it was. But you know, we would never push you into anything.” There’s a flicker of concern on his face as his hand makes spirals on your stomach.

You swallow, not answering. Of course you know they would never do that. Especially with your history. In reality you just don’t want to let any of them down.

A softness crosses Jeongin’s face as he reads right through your thoughts. “I know you hate to hear this. But we all see how special you are.” His hand begins shifting lower and lower on your belly until his finger tips are grazing the bare skin just above the button on your jeans.

The warmth of his touch and the way his eyes rake down your body leave you breathless and your nipples harden. His eyes catch on them through your shirt as draws his bottom lip between his teeth. “Let me show you how special you are, baby girl.” Slowly he undoes your jeans and slips his hand into your underwear.

At his touch your eyes flicker closed. “Innie..” You groan out. With your head on his lap you feel him harden at the mention of his name on your lips.

His fingers are still making their descent to your core and as he reaches it, he lets out a moan. “Mmm. Already wet?” And you are. Honestly you feel drenched from all the stimulation at this point, so when he sticks just a single finger inside of you, your muscles tighten around it and he spits out a curse. “Fuck.”

He flips you over then, dragging your legs open so that you are straddling his waist. Your chest is right at his eye line as he raises a hand to palm your tit through your shirt and with his finger still inserted in you, picks up pace. You throw your head back, bucking your hips to him as you feel yourself on the very edge of an orgasm. Jeongin slips another finger in and that tips you over your body moving erratically as the heat pulses through you and you call out his name.

His movements inside of you slow as your breathing regulates. Staring down at him, you brush a few pieces of his hair from his face. You lean your lips down to him, placing soft kisses across his brown, down to his chin and then to his lips.

And then, to your horror, the front door opens.

Chapter Text

Chapter 14
Jeongin’s face is shadowed with surprise as he lifts you to stand and turns his body blocking your view of the front door. You take the time to quickly button and zip your jeans before stepping out from behind him to see who has interrupted your time together.

Heat flares in your chest, as you see Felix and Seungmin stride inside the house, eyes on the two of you beside the couch. Maybe you’re imagining it but you swear that Seungmin’s gaze flicks down to Jeongin’s hand then to your body. But there's no way he knew what the two of you were just doing… right? You weren’t expecting company so it’s not as if you were necessarily being quiet. Your eyes widen as you glance to the left of you at the window that is partially covered by a curtain but there is a large enough sliver open that has you questioning what anyone may have seen when they were walking up to the door. Shit.

“Hope we aren’t interrupting.” Seungmin’s voice is indifferent as usual but he still tries to plaster a smile there as he locks eyes with you. “We brought some games and food.” The silence is thick as you and Jeongin look at each other and then back to the guys.

“You guys have the worst timing as always.” Jeongin’s voice is light and playful but behind that there is something there. Something that you can’t quite grasp. Jeongin turns his body to face you completely, his back the only thing that Seungmin and Felix can see. His eyes slide down your body as he murmurs just quiet enough that only you can hear. “We can finish later.” And he drags his fingers up to his mouth and licks your juices off of him. Your breath hitches at the sight but it’s over so quickly that you think you must’ve imagined it as he turns back to Felix and Seungmin. “Let's get set up in the office!”

Jeongin leads the way and Felix follows behind him but when you start to follow after them, Seungmin grips your wrist and twists your body to him. His grip isn’t firm and you’re sure that if you pulled away he would let you go but when you tilt your chin up to face him you can see the fire burning there. “So, we did interrupt?" His face is not accusatory, there's only a hint of quiet amusement and knowing.

Your throat goes dry. “You-“

He cuts you off with a warm laugh as he leans just slightly down to you. “Did you really think you were being subtle?” He jerks his head over to the large window where the curtains sit open just enough that you can see out into the night. “He could’ve at least pulled the curtain, but knowing him he probably wanted to be seen.”

You blink rapidly at him, feigning innocence and Seungmin just grins down at you, clearly enjoying your reaction. “Relax..” Something in his voice changes slightly, where before there was a clear breath of sarcasm now it's a tease that slates across your body. “It wasn’t too much of a show… but it’s hard to miss someone pressed up against the couch like that.”

You’re shaking your head at him. “Seungmin—“ You’re incredibly flustered as you speak, stammering like someone caught red handed.

“What?” His voice raises slightly in pitch, the perfect act of innocence. “It’s not like it was a bad view.” When your jaw drops in stunned silence, Seungmin just grins brighter. “Thanks for the entertainment before the game night.”

You glance away from him, feeling unsteady because you’ve been taken completely off guard by this reaction. As if he loves to see you squirm he continues, “For what it’s worth,” his gaze darkens as he flicks his eyes down to your lips and before trailing back up. “you two looked… happy. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen Jeongin smile like that.”

The sudden show of sincerity shocks you as you draw your bottom lip into your teeth nervously as if waiting for his next teasing remark. But again he shocks you by simply turning away and striding for the office.

“Next time maybe close the window.” He shrugs his head cocked to the side. “Or don’t. Up to you.”

After a moment of gaining your composure you follow after him. When you make it up the stairs, Felix’s laughter spills out of the room to you. Once inside you see the office for the first time and have to reel in your shock. It really isn’t an office as much as it is a cozy sitting room. There’s a large tv hanging from the wall opposite a black couch that has plush pillows and blankets laid across it. On the opposite wall is a table with several chairs and even a mini kitchen. You can’t imagine that this is where Jeongin comes to work on things but then again, you feel if this was your study space during college, you wouldn’t mind being locked in here for hours.

Across the table are snacks, drinks, and games. When Felix sees you he jumps up and heads over. “Finally! I thought Seungmin kidnapped you.” He hands you a plate with a variety of snacks.

Seungmin finds a spot on the couch near Jeongin who has busted out a speaker, flicking through a playlist for some music. “No.” His eyes flash in your direction, a sly smile on his face. “Just making sure we didn’t interrupt anything… important. Right?”

Jeongin’s eyes snap up from his phone, there’s a hint of concern there but he flawlessly recovers with a big grin to Seungmin. “You always interrupt important things, hyung.” He nudges him and then moves from the couch over to the table to grab a chocolate Pepero.

Felix places his hand on your lower back guiding you over to the table as well. He seems absolutely oblivious to whatever power struggles his two friends are putting on and the warmness is a perfect distraction from your still uneasy heart. “So what’s first? Can we pull out the Nintendo? Or maybe try Mafia?”

“Mafia.” Seungmin says easily as he makes his way over to the table as well. “Let’s see who’s the best liar tonight.”

“Definitely not you.” Jeongin says. His face is a cool expression of indifference but there’s a sharpness to his tone that makes you want to sink into the floor and disappear. You’re desperate for a change in atmosphere.

Seungmin, whose composure is as strong as an oak tree just shrugs. He begins to deal out the cards to each of you. “I guess we’ll see.”

The game begins and you’re pleasantly surprised as laughter and banter fill the space, warming your heart. You’re always so refreshed at how easy it is with these boys. They each bring something so new and needed to your life. After years of having no one to depend on, it’s constantly shocking at how easy you’re given into being cared for by them.

When your turn comes around to defend yourself, you only get a few words into your statement when Seungmin cuts through. “She’s innocent.” His tone is soft but there’s a finality there.

You roll your eyes at him. “You don’t even know my card.”

Seungmin just smirks as he leans forward slightly. “I don’t need to.”

Your eyes flick to Jeongin whose jaw tightens but quickly he recovers and flicks a chip at Seungmin. “You’re so confident for someone who always loses.”

“I’m just very observant.” Seungmin croons easily, his gaze lingering on yours for a fraction of a second before turning back to the game.

By the time the round ends, Felix has declared himself the survivor. The game and the constant remarks from Seungmin leave your skin feeling electric so you decide desperately to lighten the mood. You reach across the table and grab the last Pepero from a plate, much to Felix’s dismay.

“Alright.” You say forcing a confidence you’re not sure how you keep alive. “Game night rules are changing. If you lose any round you have to do a dare.”

Felix’s smile is bright as he does a little clap of excitement. “Yes!”

When your eyes flick to Jeongin there's a smirk that sends shivers up your back. “Sure you want to play with fire?”

With a shrug you smile cooly. “After tonight? Fire sounds fun.”

Seungmin laughs at that, smooth and surprised. He’s watching you closely but says nothing, and you don’t give him the satisfaction of glancing in his direction.

You start up a fast paced word game that requires you to clap and shout in rhythm. It’s a simple enough game but it has you all feeling and looking a little ridiculous. Now you’re all sitting on the couch. Seungmin has found his spot on the arm of the couch to the left of where you are sitting and Felix and Jeongin sit a few feet away. Early on, you lean into Seungmin’s body, your arms draped dangerously close to his lap. His body seems stiff and when you move just an inch closer he slips up in the game.

You turn to him with a shocked look as he, who is normally so composed, trips over his words. “I guess you’re the first up for a dare.” You saw overly sweet.

His glares down at you. “I don’t scare easily.”

“Well that’s good.” You reply. “Then why don’t you give us your best aegyo?”

The look of pure horror on his face has the three of you bursting into uncontrollable laughter. So when Seungmin stands up proudly and gives the most adorable puppy aeygo you’ve ever seen, the room dives even deeper into a chaotic hum, laughing ricocheting off the walls. It’s exactly what you wanted.

When the laughter finally dies down and Seungmin has returned to his seat beside you he leans down to your ear. “Happy?”

You nod leaning into him just slightly. “Very.” You murmur as the game continues around you.

At some point you make eye contact with Jeongin from across the room. He gives you a knowing look, as if he knows exactly what you were trying to do by starting this game, and he’s incredibly thankful. For the first time that night, the air doesn’t feel charged with tension, but something warmer, something you could live in for the rest of your life.

After the final game, Felix declares himself champion before ruffling his hair. “Alright it’s time to go.” His sleepy eyes glance at Seungmin who just smiles fondly at him. “Besides, I have a date in the morning.”

You feel the heat of his gaze on you before you realize it. With a wink, you stand and walk over to him, placing a kiss on his cheek before turning and grabbing various pieces of trash lying around. “Better get your rest then.” The smirk in your voice is audible. Then immediately you feel him wrap around you from behind and Felix lifts you from the floors laughing.

“I’ll be all rested for you baby girl.” You can’t control your laughter as he begins placing kisses all over your face, before placing the final one on your lips and backing away. “Don’t let Jeongin keep you up too late.”

The statement has your heart beating erratically as Felix turns away with a knowing look at you. It was probably dumb of you to assume that only Seungmin saw you from the window but knowing that Felix may have seen you like that? You take a deep steading breath before turning to the guys again. They are all spread out tidying up the space so you make your way over to Seungmin.

“Have a good night.” You say sweetly.

He doesn’t even look up to acknowledge you as he says. “You really have them wrapped around your finger huh?”

You roll your eyes as you begin to help close up food packages. “I had fun tonight too.” Your voice is dripping in sarcasm which causes his gaze to shift to you finally.

Seungmin isn’t cold, but he does calculate everything in a way that always makes you feel as if you’re under a microscope. When he looks at you know, you feel as though he isn’t searching for anything but more that he’d found it. You both stand there, staring at each other for a few moments.

The intensity is broken by Jeongin who waltzes over and slaps Seungmin on the ass. He lets out a yelp and then a laugh, the one that you love so much. “I hate to be that person, but get out.” Jeongin pulls you into his arms as he points to Felix and Seungmin. “I want some alone time with my girl now.”

You scoff. “Your girl?” He just shrugs and gives you that boyish smile of his.

Felix marches over in protest. “OUR girl Innie.” He pulls you from Jeongin’s arms and gives you a hug and a little spin before placing you back down. You’re so flustered by the act that you don’t even protest as Seungmin pulls you into his body next. His hug is sweet and short. Then he places a kiss on the top of your head.

They each say their goodbye’s to Jeongin as well before letting themselves out. As they make their way to the front door you hear Seungmin shout up to you. “Make sure you close the curtains this time.” And then the door shuts behind them.

There’s a stillness that lingers after they have left. It’s thick and waiting so when you turn to Jeongin, you’re not surprised to see his eyes burning into you. “You didn’t have to kick them out so quickly.” Your voice is softer than you intend but with the weight of his gaze you feel a pressure surrounding you.

“Didn’t need to. They knew it was time to leave.” His lips curve slightly, his dimples making an appearance. “They know I’ve been waiting for this moment.”

You freeze, your breath catching. “They—?”

He takes a few steps towards you, backing you to the couch so that your legs give out underneath you and you’re now sitting in front of him. “I don’t have to spell it out for them. For any of them.” You know he means all the members, and your mind flicks back to your conversation at rehearsal today.

That’s what undoes you. The idea that they all are in agreement about this. Despite how different and complex this new arrangement is for you, they have made an effort to be understanding and honest with each other when it comes to you… it's an overwhelming feeling in the best way.

You reach out to him but he shakes his head. “I want to do this the right way.” Then he bends down and scoops you into his arms. He’s walking out of the office, shutting off the light and making it to his bedroom.

Smoothly he shuts the door behind him and lays you on his bed. For a moment he just stands there looking down at you. Then his words come out as barely more than a whisper. “You’re everything I never knew I needed….” He crawls to you, hovering just inches over your body. “Say you’re mine tonight? Only mine.” He's demanding and needy and it makes your stomach clinch.

“I’m yours, Innie.” And then he places a hungry kiss on your lips.