Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“TRIAL SUBJECTS NEEDED, WELL-PAID OPPORTUNITY, EARLY 20s - LATE 30s REQUIRED”

That flyer had been staring at me for days, sitting in between an eviction notice and a letter stating I had lost my job. There was no information about what the trial was exactly, but I was desperate for the money. Sitting at the bottom was a phone number. 

“GIVE US A CALL NOW! JOIN THE TEAM!”

The words stared at me for a long time, almost taunting me. The options weighed up in my hands, the uncertainty of the trial, the eviction date, where I could even possibly go if I couldn’t get the money I needed. At one point I stopped, looking down to find my hand had reached out and found my phone without a conscious thought to it. That was the moment I dialed the number. 

A week later, my stuff was packed into boxes and put away into storage, while I found myself standing in a room with 13 other strangers who had signed up for the trial. Everyone was of similar age, around our late 20s to early 30s, and in similar spots in life where times were desperate and money was money. We spent the first few days of the trial learning about each other, why we were all here and who we were.

The last thing I could remember was that I had signed a form and been told to stand still before they injected me with something. The last thing I remember feeling was a burning sensation spreading throughout my body, before my vision went black. For a long time, it was just darkness, an empty black void of nothing. I don’t know how long exactly, but it felt like months. Finally, I started to feel conscious in my body again, my fingers and toes twitching as my eyes tried to blink open. 

My name is Grian, and this is the story of a trial that changed my life forever. 

Chapter Text

I groaned as my eyes started to open, a blurry and bright light filling my senses suddenly, overwhelming me. Around me I could hear movement and groans from other familiar voices that I had come to learn in the days leading up to the trial’s start. My eyes finally opened fully only to be assaulted by the bright sun, so I rolled onto my stomach to shield myself and give me an easier way of sitting up. Laying around me was the other trial subjects, all of us having been placed in a circle in the middle of–

“Uh, guys? Where even are we?” I heard a voice call out, turning around to see Scott with his hand above his eyes to block the sun as he looked around the landscape. 

“Well now that is a mighty good question, but I have another one. What are we supposed to do now?” Cleo roared from behind the group. 

Everyone stood together in the group, all of us with too many questions to ask, when a sound began to play from seemingly nowhere, a screen now starting to fill the sky. 

“What is that? Are we in The Hunger Games?” Joel called out, everyone giving a nervous laugh in response because the truth was, we didn’t know anything, and we very well could have been!

“Hello to all of our beautiful trial candidates! Welcome to the wilderness! You won’t remember me, but I am the one in charge of this trial, so thank you all so much once again for volunteering, don’t worry though, once the trial is over, you will all be paid handsomely for your time and effort. Now on to the technical stuff!

Here in this land, you have to fend for yourselves. There is some shelter, food and resources in the village about a hundred metres from where you all are now. I’m aware most of you come from the city lands, so let me just warn you about the wildlife here in the wilderness. Be wary at night and in the caves as hostile creatures will show themselves to you, and they’re not very talkative. You will need to use the minimal landscape we have allowed for this trial to build yourselves a home and find tools and weapons to help you survive! If you all direct your attention to your left wrists, you will see a patch of colour. That patch indicates how many lives you have! Green is for 3 lives, Yellow is for 2 lives and Red is for your final life, so be careful. Treat the red like you have treated your whole life so far. 

Oh, and before I forget, there are no rules in this land! You have complete free will here. Am I forgetting anything else? Oh, I don’t think so. Well with that, good luck everyone! We hope the trial is a success!” The words boomed across the sky, and admittedly, I didn’t pay much attention to a majority of what was said, too focused on trying to see the village from our standpoint. 

We were standing in an open field, to one side of us was some stone terrain that looked a bit steep, and the other side of us was forest land. Admittedly, I was terrified. I had never been beyond city limits in my entire life, mostly due to my parents sheltering me a lot, but from the stories I had heard about people who had been beyond the city limits and never returned again, about the scary creatures that lurked beyond the veil of light, and now I was here. Left to my own to make new friends and survive in a trial that hopefully wouldn’t leave me dead at the end. 

The video flashed away, leaving the group in silence once again. None of us dared to speak the first word, letting ourselves be embraced by the sun and the sounds of the wildlife we had never known. I looked around more until my eyes landed on a foggy wooden shape further in the distance in the open field. 

“Uh, guys? Is that the village or have my glasses stopped working?” I called to the group, looking and pointing off in the direction I hadn’t dare let my eyes leave from. 

“Holy shit, it is! Grian, you found the village!” Skizz called, running over to Grian and grabbing his shoulders. 

“Alright guys, I think we need a game plan. That woman just said we are completely desolate, we will be experiencing the things we’ve heard stories about in the city. We need protection and shelter until we understand this land a bit more, let’s move as a group to the village. We don’t want to test the life system this early, so look out for each other. I’ve read many stories and researched the wilderness for many years. There are going to be random holes in the ground we won’t see until it’s too late. They will be good for caving for resources but they will hurt like a bitch to fall into. Let’s move now before we waste any more sunlight.” Etho spoke up, moving to the front of the group. In the days leading up to the start of this trial, we had been warned of the dangers and we had learnt there and then how powerful Etho would be in this trial. He spent the days leading up to it trying to share any little bits of knowledge he could with the group so that we weren’t completely unprepared. He taught us how to gather resources in the wilderness, how to use certain tools and craft together items that would infinitely help us. As we all walked as a group towards the village in the distance, Etho made sure to continue his commentary and share his knowledge about everything around us, now that we were actually standing amongst nature where we could visually understand Etho’s words. 

After what felt like hours, the group made it to the village, all in one piece. Surprisingly, none of us had injured ourselves in the walk, and at one point we stopped to have a rest while Etho spoke to us about the sun, how both the sun and moon can be used as both a compass and a clock. At the village, we all split away to make a claim on one of the houses. Surprisingly, but thankfully, there were already beds in every house, and farms outside for food. At least the people running the trial didn’t leave us completely abandoned. I decided to claim a house right next to one of the farms, and was surprised to find what looked like a treasure chest inside the house. 

“Guys, there’s some kind of treasure chest in my house?!” I called out, wondering if anyone was still close enough to hear me. 

“Oh that’s amazing! Grian you chose a good house dude, you’ll get some free stuff in the chest you can take and use! You’ll be able to find these chests in random places all over the wilderness.” Etho shouted as he ran into the house, slamming the door open as he ran. With his watchful eye, I opened the chest to discover some pieces of food, a pickaxe, a sword and some heavy shirt thing?

“Hey Etho, what’s this?” I asked, gesturing to the weird heavy shirt. Etho came closer, peeking his head over my shoulder before his eyes lit up and he grabbed my shoulders with his hands. 

“Grian holy shit! That right there is a chest plate, and it’s one of the best items to have here. That will give you extra protection against the hostiles, it is going to become your best friend. You can also find, or make, pants and boots to completely cover and protect you!” Etho exclaimed, pulling out a notebook about the items to show me. Etho was the only one allowed to bring anything from the city with him to this place, purely because it was an asset for everyone. His notebook had every bit of research he had done about the wilderness with every fact and detail you could imagine. If I could get Etho as a friend and ally in this trial, it would be the biggest blessing in my entire life. 

With all the information given to me by Etho, I felt prepared. The sun was quickly setting, so everyone slowly shuffled away and split up again, off to their separate houses. The first night was the scariest, watching the zombies and skeletons rise from the ground, watching the endermen suddenly teleport in front of my window, to the creepers and giant spiders that came out from the shadows. Each and every hostile was terrifying, and could hurt in bad ways, not that I understood what all of them did. I could tell the obvious ones, like how the skeletons had bow and arrows somehow, the endermen were tall but thin and could teleport anywhere and the spiders with their very large size, each of the hostiles fascinating in their own ways, and I wanted to learn more and know exactly what each one did but I was not one to dare even think about leaving my house. The beds that were there actually weren’t the worst in the world, and before I knew it, the sun was rising and the hostiles were disappearing quickly. 

Everyone took that as their cue to leave their houses, regrouping in the middle of the village. With the information we had learnt so far and the knowledge that we were safe for as long as the sun was up, everyone split their own separate ways. My goal for this first real day of the trial was to try to build myself a little home. I wasn’t brave enough to venture to the caves just yet, thankfully what I had collected from the village was all I needed for the moment. I wandered away from the village, staying the direction of the clear field so I wouldn’t be surprised by any hostiles, when I came across a small little group of hills filled with different flowers, dropping off to be the perfect space for a little house built inside the stone mound, offering me some protection around the entrance in the form of torches lighting up the surrounding landscape. When I finally emerged from the house I had carved out, the sun was midway in the sky. 

“Huh, that didn’t take as long as I thought it would have…” I spoke aloud to myself. The peace was nice, being by myself in nature was a completely new experience for me, and I was realising just how much I enjoyed using my hands to build and craft like this, but at the same time it felt lonely, with everyone having split off so far apart from each other. With that thought in mind, I decided to venture back towards the village, see if anyone else had gone back and try to gather up enough food supplies to start my own farm close to home. 

Thankfully, the walk wasn’t a long one, I had given myself a decent space away from the village while staying close enough, mostly for protection, a bit out of fear of travelling too far and getting lost. I didn’t know the limits of the landscape they had given us for this trial. Based on the video projection, we were caged up like animals inside an invisible dome of some kind, so I knew there was a limit to how far we could travel, but I wasn’t going to test it just yet, not until the time comes where I absolutely needed to for certain supplies and materials. Entering the village pathway, I spotted a group of people hanging out on the edge of the village. 

“Hey guys, it’s Grian!” A voice called from the group, everyone turning to face me with a smile. Everyone was now looking to be in a similar position to me, with some protective armour and weapons. 

“Oh I’m so glad to see you guys are still doing okay!” I exclaimed, walking towards the group. As I got closer, I could see them all surrounding one tree that was different from the rest, one I hadn’t seen before in real life. “Is that a Dark Oak?”

“Why, it is indeed! The only one of its kind here! I have explored far and wide and found this beauty!“ Etho exclaimed, proud of his discovery. I walked around the tree, taking in its beauty when I noticed some hidden Dark Oak saplings in the shadows under the tree. I remembered that in the end, this trial is meant to be a free for all type trial with no consequences, where I realised I was in the perfect position to take the saplings completely unnoticed.

Walking back to the front of the tree, Etho was still explaining how he found the saplings for it but it was a very limited resource in the limited space we had, when I found myself at the back of the group once again, looking toward the tree where I noticed a flash of orange and a grey haze drifting up from the leaves. 

“Uh, Etho? I think your tree is on fire.” I spoke up, interrupting the group discussion. 

“WHAT?!” Etho shouted, running to me to look at the tree as it quickly engulfed in flames. “WHO DID THIS?” The group turned away from the tree and began looking between each other before a voice spoke up. 

“I have my money on Scar.” Cleo spoke, turning to look at Scar as he stood, staring at the tree with an accomplished smirk across his face. 

“What was me? Oh, the tree? Oh yea that was totally me,” Scar laughed, looking back to the group. “But I'm sure you’ve got plenty more of those saplings, don’t you Etho?”

That voice. That face. I don’t know what it was, but there was something in the way Scar laughed and the confidence he held that had me, for the first time in this trial, hoping that I could make it through this trial, and maybe make a lifelong friend out of it. There was something about, well, everything about Scar enchanted me, and I wanted to get closer to that feeling, even if he did scare me. 

The group had erupted into chaotic conversation and shouting, but I remembered the saplings I stole from under the tree. Looking around, my eyes landed on Scar again, as if my eyes were drawn to Scar with a mind of their own. He was standing off to the side, watching the chaos he had started, and in that moment I knew that I wanted to be Scar’s ally and friend in this trial. I carefully shuffled my way towards him so as to not draw any attention to us. 

“Hey, uh, Scar?” I spoke, voice barely above a whisper. I didn’t look at him, just kept watching the still burning tree. 

“Hello, Grian. Good to see you’ve got some protection going,” Scar smiled, flicking his eyes to look me up and down before looking back to the group. “What can I do for you?”

“Follow me.” I spoke, my body trembling from anxiousness and also a bit of fear. I would be lying if I didn’t say Scar scared me, but for some reason I wanted to feel every feeling Scar gave me. He followed me behind the house that was directly behind us, slipping away unnoticed from the group’s chaos still booming. 

“Oh secret meeting, how scandalous of us.” Scar chuckled, speaking in a low voice that surprised me. I found myself just staring at him for a minute as he laughed gently, looking to make sure no one followed us before turning back to me, raising his eyebrow in question. 

“Uh- I uh–“ I found myself stumbling, trying to compose myself again by clearing my throat. “So, uh, I may have noticed something when I inspected the tree and, well, after that uh, display, I think you might be the only one I can give this information to right now.” 

Scar stared at me for a minute, his face twisted in calculated thought. He nodded as a smile crept onto his face, reaching his hand out in a gesture to continue talking. I stumbled over my words a bit more before giving up, opting for pulling the saplings out of my bag to just show him. Scar’s eyes lit up, and he looked at me with eyes so bright you’d think the stars and moon lived inside them. 

“Oh, Grian, this is gold! How did someone like you manage to be the perfect thief?”  Scar laughed, shoving them back down into my bag before anyone came around. I don’t know why, but those words stung, which was odd because I had spent my entire life being the weird, nerdy, wimpy sort of kid that’s an easy target, but people’s words had never really affected me before, so why did Scar’s words sting?

“Dunno, maybe my true secret calling was to be a thief, lurking in the shadows.” I chuckled, only being half serious, but when I looked up at Scar, he was looking at me with a face I couldn’t decipher. 

“I feel like that was meant to be a joke, but Grian, you genuinely have the skills to survive here, I know it. I’ve already hurt myself a bunch, but by the looks of you,” Scar paused, his hand reaching out to grab my arm, gently moving my sleeve up my arm. “You don’t have a single mark anywhere on you. You need to give yourself more credit.”

Scar stared at me for a few minutes, and all I could do was stare back. Scar’s hand was still gently holding my arm, where I could feel sparks running through my veins. 

“Do you want to start a monopoly with me?” Scar spoke, breaking the silence. I jumped, my arm pulling back out of Scar’s grip suddenly. Being around Scar caused all my nerves to be on high alert, and I didn’t understand why. I knew Scar scared me a bit, but would fear be causing all this?

“I’m sorry, a monopoly?” I asked, my voice cracking slightly as I broke out of my circle of thoughts. 

“Yeah! You have those super rare saplings now, but I also happened to have found a small desert we could rule over, forcing everyone else here to have to pay us for the desert supplies. No one can make their houses safe and beautiful without sand!” Scar announced, his voice dripping with cocky arrogance. The way he spoke, he brought a confidence that had you wanting to believe every word, but I didn’t have confidence in myself. 

“I don't know, Scar. I don’t think I'm the right person to do this with you. I’m sorry.” I sighed, closing my bag up again securely. 

“Ah, it’s okay, Grian. I’m sure I'll be able to make this monopoly dream happen at some point regardless! Don't worry though, I won’t tell anyone about your little find,” Scar spoke, smiling softly at me. He paused for a second, slowly looking me up and down once again. “For what it’s worth, I think you’re going to be a powerful person in this trial, even if you don’t think so.”

Scar paused for a moment longer after he spoke, before turning and heading back towards the forest, away from the rest of the group. What did he mean by that? I had always been bottom of the class in terms of anything physical, so I didn’t believe a word Scar said. I looked back towards the group still standing in the village, none of them having noticed the absence of myself or Scar, so I took that as my moment to quietly leave the group before anyone figured out there were saplings that went missing.

Chapter Text

My mind kept replaying Scar’s words, over and over again. 

“You’re going to be a powerful person in this trial, even if you don’t think so.”

What did he mean by that? Even if I don’t think so? We had only been here for two days and it felt like the man had seen through me, into my soul. How could he possibly have made an assumption like that over one interaction!

I laid in bed in my new house, carved out by my own hands, but I couldn’t sleep. My mind wouldn’t let me rest when all I could imagine was Scar, his voice, his face, his energy. Eventually, I gave up on the idea of sleep as it obviously wasn’t going to happen for me that night. I stumbled to my makeshift kitchen, which was really just a stack of logs, a chest and a furnace, and made myself a coffee. I had been here for a few days now and no one had died yet, all of us too scared to test the limits of the trial yet. We all knew we had time still. Even with the dark sky showing only what little light the moon and stars gave, even with the fear of the hostiles beyond the light of my torch sanctuary amongst the flowers, I stepped outside for some air, some peace in nature to stop my mind from circling. I had managed to set myself up pretty safely over the previous couple of days, finding and making enough torches to light up a large portion of the flower valley surrounding the stone hill I perched in, and for the first time since landing in the wilderness, I felt safe. I felt calm. As I sipped on my coffee, I sighed a breath of relief as my mind went silent for the first time since landing here. 

“Well, what a sight this is.” A low voice softly called from behind me. I jumped, surprisingly not spilling a drop of my coffee, spinning on my heel to see whoever was there, only to see no one. I spun my head around but having no glasses on in the middle of the night with only torch light surrounding me, I couldn’t see a thing. 

“Who’s there?” I called, gripping my coffee a bit tighter in my hand. A low whistle sounded into the still night, sounding like it was coming from higher land than I was standing on. 

“Ah, so without those glasses, you’re pretty blind, huh?” A chuckle followed the words before a blurry figure jumped down from a tree above my house. The figure disappeared into my house but before I could get a word out, they reappeared, handing me my glasses. I hesitated for a second before quickly grabbing them and slipping them on my face, opening my eyes again to find–

“Scar?” I asked, my voice coming out soft. How was it that the one person I couldn’t get out of my head for who knows what reason, is now the person standing right in front of me. “What are you doing here? At this time of night?”

“I’ll counter that, what are you doing awake, outside with a cup of coffee and no protection in sight?” Scar asked, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrow as his hands gestured to my body, where I remembered I had crawled straight out of bed and was wearing only a long pair of pants. My face immediately flushed, using one hand and a coffee cup to try and cover my chest as I awkwardly laughed. 

“I uh, couldn’t sleep, that’s all! Besides! this is my home, so why are you here!” I shouted, feeling myself getting flustered. I sighed, letting myself relax enough to drink what remained of my coffee before it went cold. 

“Hey, no need to get so defensive buddy. Truth be told, I couldn’t sleep either and I haven’t exactly found anywhere I’d like to build a home yet. I’ve been bunking in a village house at night but for some reason, the hostiles really like the village, and I noticed the light coming from your torches in the distance so I decided to investigate, see if it was a safe place to hang out for a while, but as I got closer I saw you walk outside and didn’t want to alarm you,” Scar spoke, a sheepish look on his face as he scratched his neck, leaning against a tree. “By the way, you should totally install some chairs out here.”

“Chairs? Why would I do that when I finally have the excuse to be allowed to sit in the grass, feel the grass. I’ve never been allowed near nature.” The words fell from my lips absentmindedly as I sat in the grass, stretching my legs out and leaning back on my hands, closing my eyes as I took a deep breath. 

“You really haven’t experienced nature? Like, at all?” Scar questioned before I felt the grass next to me shift. I opened my eyes and looked to my side where Scar had sat, joining me in the grass. His question made me realise what I had said and my eyes went wide. 

“Uh, I mean–“ I stumbled, unsure of what to say that wouldn’t make me sound weak, before my head dipped as I sighed. “You’re going to change your mind about thinking I’ll be powerful in this trial.”

I looked over to find Scar staring at me, an almost puzzled look on his face before recognition of his words flashed through his eyes. I turned away again, staring out over the empty field where hostile creatures were running rampant in the dark distance. 

“What if I promise it won't?" Scar spoke, watching me. I turned to face him, raising my eyebrow in question. “My mind, I mean! What if I promise it won’t change my mind about you in this trial?” Scar stuttered, starting to sound like me. I chuckled, sitting up and crossing my legs instead. 

“Well, I mean I’ve never told anyone really about my upbringing, but hey, we’re stuck here for who knows how long,” I started, glancing toward Scar who softly smiled at me, sitting up also. “I, uh, gosh where do I even begin. So, I was homeschooled for most of my life. My parents shut me away from most of the world, I don’t know why but I believe having me as an only child changed them, made them afraid of everything. So I spent most of my developing years inside, having never left my house. It wasn’t until I had turned nineteen that I was sick of it and grew the courage to leave. That was over a decade ago now, and I haven’t spoken to or seen them since. It’s just been me trying to pave the way and make something happen with my life by myself.” 

A silence fell across us as my words drifted into the night. I hadn’t told anyone about my life or my parents before, and after a decade of being by myself, it felt freeing to finally have someone to tell. Without noticing it building up, a tear slipped from my eye that I quickly wiped away, hoping Scar didn’t see. If he did, he didn’t show it. 

“Well,” Scar coughed, breaking the silence. “Since you shared with me, I feel it’s only right to share with you, too. If you don’t mind, of course.”

“Oh! I mean, you absolutely don’t have to but I won’t stop you.” I responded, sitting straighter in surprise. I straightened my glasses and looked back toward the open field, waiting in the silence. 

“Well, I guess the best way for me to start this is to say I never really knew my parents. I guess you could say we’re opposites, you and I. No one wanted me, and I bounced from home to home with the same excuse each time. My personality was too much for them. All of them. So, we're the same in the fact we’ve both been alone for a long time, except I’ve experienced nature before.” Scar spoke, a sigh escaping behind his final word. 

We sat in silence for a few minutes, my mind continually playing over his words. I’ve experienced nature before. What did he mean by that? It wasn’t easy to find nature in the city, there’s regular Oak trees grown everywhere they could fit a space for, but nature itself was not common to see, unless you went beyond the city border. 

“Well, the sun's starting to rise so I’m going to take that as my cue to leave,” Scar spoke, starting to stand up again. He started to walk away before stopping, turning his head slightly back towards me. “And for what it’s worth, Grian, you’re a lot better cut out for this than you believe.” Scar stated, ending with a wink before jumping off the stone hill, disappearing into the shadows again. 

I sat there, staring off in the direction of where Scar went as my confusion rose. What about anything we had spoken about made that man really believe I was cut out for this? Why the wink? My mind wouldn’t stop racing until only a short moment later, I was cut out of my thoughts by a piece of fabric, wait no, a shirt, being thrown towards me. 

“You should cover up, you don’t want everyone to know you’re not as much of a wimp as you make yourself out to be.” Scar’s voice startled me, forcing me to stand up and spin around, knocking over the cup my coffee had once been in. Scar was standing just in front of my door, one arm crossed over his chest while his other was extended out, gesturing down when I remembered I had still been shirtless this whole time. 

“What do you mean? Where did you come from again? Why do you keep scaring the ever loving shit out of me!” I shouted quickly back at him as I scrambled to cover myself with the shirt. 

“Ok woah slow down, now let me answer. I mean the fact you make yourself seem like the biggest nerd and wimpy guy you’d ever meet, and yet there you stand with that hidden muscle. I simply came from behind again, I jumped down to get a leverage point to climb up the other side of your door. As for scaring you, well, I can’t help it. It’s funny to watch.” Scar answered, giving that same cocky smile I had seen when he burnt the tree down at the village. 

Before I could say anything more, Scar laughed, saluted me and ran off once again, this time actually leaving my home space, with the sun fully risen now. I had spent an entire night doing everything but relaxing. I turned on my heel and walked back into my makeshift home, deciding to gear up and spend the day exploring the world a little bit more. 

I headed off, walking around the landscape for a while in the safety of the sun when I found the desert that Scar had spoken about, except it was much larger than he had thought it was. Eventually I looked up toward the sun, noticing it was the early afternoon where I decided to find my way back home. As I crept closer to home, I noticed the majority of the group gathered out by the village, so out of my natural curiosity, I walked towards them, detouring away from my home. 

“What’s going on over here?” Grian called, approaching the group. He smiled, soaking in the welcomes from Etho, Tango and Cleo. Everyone was happily chattering away, with Scar, Martyn and Impulse coming to join in. 

As everyone was talking, getting pranked by Martyn with loud noises and whatever else was going on, I noticed a creeper standing in the distance. I hadn’t had any experience with them yet, but the creature had no arms and no weapon so it couldn’t do that much damage right? 

I snuck away from the group, getting close to the creeper when it started slowly chasing me. Without thinking clearly, I ran back to the group hoping the hostile would be deterred away, but instead it locked on to Scar, who had his back faced to both me and the creeper. Before I could even shout or interrupt everyone’s talking, the creeper stood still behind Scar, a sudden loud hissing noise playing through the air before an explosion rang out across the group, all of us being thrown backwards. As I landed, I quickly tried to climb myself back up to look at Scar, which I realised was a horrible idea. Standing there, in the same still position he had been standing already, was Scar with his face struck in a look of shock and confusion. He slowly dropped to his knees as the blood surrounding him became evident. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but he couldn’t get a word out before he dropped forward, exposing his bloody, shredded back where you could see part of his spine showing. 

The scene in front of me was bloody and gruesome, not at all what I would have expected for a new life system, but right there staring at Scar, I didn’t know if it was even going to work. If Scar was actually dead. 

Everyone was in a state of silent shock, not a single person daring to open their mouth, and no one dared openly blame me. I could just tell. My head dropped in defeat as tears started rolling down my cheeks, the sight in front of me one I didn’t think I could ever bear to see, and yet in the worst way possible I had exposed myself to the horrors. Before my mind could continue to spin, I felt a hand on my shoulder and heard a gentle whisper. 

“Grian, look.” 

My eyes snapped open, my head raised to find Scar’s body slowly disintegrating into particles, looking like a scene out of Avengers Endgame. Before I could even process what I was seeing, he was gone. Scar's body vanished and aside from the damage from the creeper’s explosion, it was like there was never even a trace of Scar being there in that state. My mouth opened and closed a few times and the tears slowly finished streaming down my face, my body in a state of shock and adrenaline, struggling to process the series of events that just unfurled in front of me, because of me. Before I could even manage to get a word out of my throat, a voice started shouting off in the distance. 

“Is that–“ Martyn began to speak before being cut off. 

“Scar?!” Cleo shouted, her eyes opening wider than I ever thought possible. My head snapped up to look in the direction everyone was facing to find Scar running towards us all again, waving his arms around. 

“Guys! Guys! Oh my God! It worked, it actually works!” Scar’s voice sounded out as he grew closer. Impulse, Etho and Cleo all ran towards Scar, none of us believing he was here and he was okay. 

I sat on my knees, the hard ground rubbing against my shins as I watched everyone crowd around Scar, smiles on everyone’s faces at finally seeing proof the trial was working. As I watched everyone crowd around Scar, I watched as his eyes scanned everyone before they landed on me. He paused, and where I expected to see him give me a smile, maybe some kind of acknowledgment that he was okay and I hadn’t jeopardised my potential friendship with him, instead I watched as he narrowed his eyes at me, looking at me with what could only be described with a cold, dark rage, before turning back to the group with a smile. 

I sat there, still on my knees, as I continued watching the group with a shaky smile, the tears beginning to flow once again. 

Chapter Text

“SCAR! I’M SORRY! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!”

I jolted awake with a fright, my body snapping itself upright in bed as my hand clutched at my chest. I looked around in a hurry, rushing to find my glasses beside the bed. Everything was dark except for the small amount of torch light that shone inside the house, if you could even really call it that, but I was back in reality. 

It was just a nightmare. 

I pulled my knees up to my chest, hiding my face away to take deep breaths. The scenes of yesterday hadn’t stopped replaying in my mind, and now they were haunting my dreams. The guilt, the shame, I couldn’t dare face anyone else in the group, let alone Scar. 

I knew it was pointless trying to sleep any further. It seemed like this was becoming a new regular thing for me, not getting much sleep and waking up to have a coffee in the middle of the night. Yesterday, I was happy with the late company from Scar, but today? I was terrified to see him. So this time, I made my coffee and made my way back to bed with it, not daring to step even one foot outside of this hole in the wall. 

From my bed, I had a perfect window view to the outside wilderness, where I sat and stared off as I drank the coffee, trying to make a plan for how the day would go. Would people come looking for him? Would Scar want revenge? The look in Scar’s eyes as he stared at me, it was like nothing I had ever seen. The pure rage, the hurt, the betrayal all wrapped into one, and I didn’t have enough courage to go find him and just explain and tell him I’m sorry. 

I was a coward. 

I groaned, slamming my mug down onto the log next to the bed, grabbing my face with my hands, pulling my hair slightly just to feel pain. There was nothing I could ever do to repay Scar for the damage I had caused with my carelessness. 

Or, maybe there was something I could do. 

I slowly raised my head, my eyes widening as a thought flashed through my mind. I looked around me in a hurry, finding my shirt and stumbling toward the door as I attempted to slip my shoes on my feet. I flung the door open, stumbling out into the brisk air when I stopped, looking around the landscape. 

“I don’t know where he would even be…” I sighed, my shoulders hunching slightly. I paused in the flowers surrounding my home's entrance, adjusting my sword on my hip. I barely knew how to use the thing, but Scar had been right. I needed to always have some form of protection on me if I was going to survive in this wilderness, especially if I kept up these middle of the night adventures. 

“I see you took my advice.” A voice rang out from the shadows in the trees above my house. I quickly spun on my heel, my hand messily finding the hilt of my sword. Looking up in the trees, I lowered my hand, sighing as I realised who it was. 

“Scar…” I spoke softly, letting my body drop out of its defensive position, hoping Scar would see I didn’t mean to hurt him. I opened my mouth to call out to him, asking him to come out of the shadows when a force pushed me, my back slamming into one of the trees around us, a strong arm pressed flat against my chest holding me in place. I felt the wind leave my lungs, choking as my body slammed into the solid tree trunk. I slowly looked up, my eyes finding Scar’s that only showed rage behind them. 

“Why,” Scar growled in a low voice. “Why did you do this to me? How could you betray me?” 

My body stood frozen, my blood running cold under the glare of Scar’s eyes. The pain in my back and chest weren’t anything compared to the look in his eyes as he stared at me. I had destroyed what could have been the best friendship I could have had, ever. 

“Scar, please, I didn’t mean to…” My voice came out raspy, barely audible if it wasn’t for the silent night surrounding us. 

“Bullshit. You led that thing RIGHT TO ME!” Scar shouted, my whole body flinching in a violent reaction to the closeness of us. 

“Please, Scar, I didn’t know that would happen! I’ve never even seen a creeper before! You have to believe me, please.” I begged, feeling the warm tears streaming down my cheeks, my body failing to hold them back any longer. I looked up at Scar, gripping his arm, seeing a flash of something cross his eyes, as if he was trying to decide whether he should believe me or not. 

Slowly the pressure released from my chest, my body falling to my knees without the force to hold me up any more. I crouched underneath Scar, begging in my hands and knees for his forgiveness. 

“Scar, I couldn’t think of anything I could possibly offer you to make up for what I did. I was careless. I was a God Damn fool,” I choked on my breath as I spoke. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes tight as more tears streamed freely down my face. “The only thing I could even think of to make it up to you, I don’t even know if you’ll accept it. Please hear me out, Scar. Please.” 

Scar stood there, mouth shut tight as he crossed his arms over his chest. I looked up at him, and he nodded at me to continue. 

“I owe you, until I lose my first life. Everything you tell me to do, any wish you have, I will be there by your side to help you. You don’t have to be alone.” I spoke, looking up at Scar as I choked back my tears, pleading for his forgiveness. 

Scar stood there for a long while, staring down at me with calculating eyes. It felt like en eternity of torture waiting for his response, but it was the absolute least I deserved after the damage I had caused to him. He sighed and looked up, pinching the bridge of his nose as he turned around, trying to decide if he was going to accept my offer. 

“… Fine,” Scar spoke, short and sharp. If I hadn’t been anxiously waiting to hear his response, I would have missed it. “Everything I say, everything I tell you to do, you will do it, no questions asked, and I'll help protect you from losing your first life for as long as I can. Do I make myself clear?” Scar spoke, turning his head back to look at me as I sat up. In the shadows, it was terrifying to see this angle of Scar. The torch light lit up his eyes, while the rest of his face was cast into shadow. He looked like a creature coming out of the shadows to hunt me. 

“Of course! Understood. Please believe me, Scar. I just want to be your fr–“

“My friend? Oh, Grian, my boy,” Scar chuckled darkly as he crouched down to my level. “We were never going to be friends.” 

Scar stood up quickly, staring at me for a moment longer before disappearing once again into the shadows, leaving me alone once again. I stared after him for a long time after he left, before finally collecting myself together, standing up once again on shaky legs, stumbling back into my house where I promptly collapsed once again, barely making it back through the front door. 

I had connected with Etho in the very beginning, but Scar was the one person who I felt connected to on a different level. I had told him my story so easily, and being around him felt natural, and in one moment I had ruined everything. The yellow glow on Scar’s wrist bearing a constant reminder of the betrayal, but he had accepted my offer. He agreed to letting me help him, and that was at least a step in the right direction. A broken smile crept onto my face, a shaky laugh escaping my lips as the weight of everything that had happened within the last twenty-four hours hit me like a truck as my vision went black. 

When I awoke again, I was on the stone ground of my home, my joints aching in stiff pain as the sun shone bright through the windows, already half-way up the morning sky. I groaned, picking my body off the floor and stretching as I stood, finding myself a drink of water as my heart raced, remembering all the events of the night. 

I slowly slipped into my armour, ensuring my sword was hooked tight to my pants, before exiting the house into the daylight. I looked across the valley, seeing random people from the group running around with each other doing who knows what, before I came to my decision. I had to pack up and find Scar, stay by his side at all times to help him, protect him, no matter the task or circumstances. Until I died, my life was pledged to keeping him safe. 

I packed all my essential gear into my bag before stepping out the door for the last time, looking back at my first home in the wilderness with a proud smile, before setting off towards the village. I had no idea where I could find Scar, but my best bet was to start in the village, see if anyone else knew where he might be, even if showing my face to the group was a terrifying thought. As I approached the village, I saw a small group of people wandering around, slowing down when they spotted me. I felt like a bird in a cage, walking on eggshells around everyone and hoping that the incident hadn’t caused irreparable damage to my relationship with everyone. 

“Grian?” Cleo asked, stepping forward. “I didn’t expect to see you out here so soon after– well uh, yesterday…” She trailed off, unsure if she was about to set off a ticking tomb bomb within me. I gave her a weak smile in response. 

“I know, I uh, well, didn’t think I’d be out here this soon either but… I need to find Scar. I need to fix what I did.” I spoke, feeling a confidence rising in my chest. Cleo gave me a smile in response, looking like she was happy to see me fighting through. 

“Well, none of us have seen him today. Can I help you look for him?” Cleo asked, looking at me with something that looked like pity in her eyes. 

“No, that’s okay. This is something I need to do myself.” I smiled, shaking my head gently. I thanked Cleo for her help, wandering away again to a place I could be alone to think about where Scar may have gone. 

“I also happened to have found a small desert we could rule over.” 

Scar’s words rang through my head, remembering where the desert was from my minimal exploration so far. 

“Well, it’s my only lead right now.” I spoke quietly to myself, turning around to look in the direction of the desert. Sighing to myself, I hitched my bag up on my shoulder and set out on the journey to find Scar, hoping to God that he had a house or even a bed. 

The sun slowly travelled across the sky overhead as I followed its direction, leading me slowly but surely towards the desert I believed Scar would be at. Eventually, I could see the sand in the distance, but it still looked empty and alone, with no sign of human life. Hoping this wasn’t just a huge waste of time, I travelled closer in hopes I would see Scar just over the hill, but as I reached the top, there was nothing. No one anywhere, no sign of life even having been here. Out of frustration, I let my bag fall from my shoulder as I kicked the sand below my feet, letting a shout ring out into the air. I yelled for as long as my breath permitted until collapsing on my knees, gasping for air. I had only been here for four days, and I had already ruined everything. 

I sat there in the sand, on my knees, for a while as I caught my breath, until I felt I was stable enough to stand once again. The sun was high in the sky, glaring down on me in a heat that overwhelmed the senses when I finally decided I needed to find some shade where I was thankfully still close to the edge where the forest meets the sand. With my bag in hand, I shuffled my way down the sandy hill towards the tree line, sighing a deep sigh of relief as I reached the shade, pulling a bottle of water out of my bag for my sudden desperate thirst. 

I sat under that tree for a while, trying to think about where Scar could possibly be. I didn’t know the limits of our landscape, and he could have been absolutely anywhere! I rested my head back against the trunk of a tree, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, allowing myself to try and relax for just a moment to clear my mind and come up with a plan of how to find Scar before it got dark. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself staring straight up at Scar, who was perched on a branch in the tree above me, his arms crossed behind his head as a humming tune started vibrating out of the leaves. 

“Scar?” I questioned, wondering how long he had even been there for. 

“Hey, Grian. You know, you’ve got a mighty powerful set of lungs on you. If I didn't know any better, I would’ve thought you were being murdered.” Scar remarked, shuffling himself so we could swing off the branch onto the ground beside me. 

“You heard that…” I spoke, trailing off as embarrassment flushed over me. 

“Mhm, I did indeed. What are you doing out here, huh?” Scar stood up, towering over me with his arms crossed over his chest as I remained seated in the grass. I don’t know why I expected a friendlier greeting from him, but my heart sank slightly at the coldness still lingering in his voice. 

“I’m here to honour my deal. I’m here to help you with everything you need,” I stated, standing up before hoisting my bag back over my shoulder. “I remembered you saying you wanted to make a monopoly on the desert so I took my chances at trying to find you here.”

Scar’s demeanour shifted slightly at my words, his arms dropping to his side as his expression shifted into one of confusion and surprise. 

“You… you were serious about that?” Scar’s words came soft, the shock in his voice being horribly masked by coldness. 

“I was, Scar. I pledge my first life to you. As long as I still have my first life, I am your ally. I am your soldier. I’ll be whatever you need me to be as long as it can help keep you safe.” My voice was stronger than I thought it would be, the shakiness I felt in my body completely gone from my voice as the confidence rose up. 

Scar stared at me for a long time, and the nerves coursing through my veins continued to rise as the silence grew longer. Eventually, Scar looked up to the sky where the sun sat low in the sky, the afternoon slowly drifting away. 

“Alright. I accept your pledge,” Scar started, looking back at me for a brief moment before turning around to face his back to me. “But only under the condition that you’re aware I won’t be easy on you. I will make you do as much work as it takes to repay me for the betrayal. The first order of business I have for you is to build us a house.”

I awoke the next morning to find Scar had already retreated out of the temporary shelter we had set up for ourselves in yesterday's late afternoon. I wasn’t surprised to see him gone, and in all honesty, I was relieved he wasn’t there when I awoke. 

I situated myself by gathering my few tools, rising from our makeshift underground bunker into the sunlight with only one mission on my mind: a house. A real house. 

I spent a majority of my day collecting the materials and resources I would need, and by midday I had the foundations of the house built. Being in the city my whole life, I never knew I had this skill to build and design, but being out here gave me the chance and the confidence to let myself work freely, and my efforts were quickly paying off. I had almost completed the first floor when I sat on the wall, giving myself a chance to rest for a minute when I spotted Scar running around the empty desert, looking like he was taking notes about the border where the sand meets the trees. I felt a small smile creep onto my face before I quickly composed myself, shaking my head as if to clear my thoughts. I looked back towards Scar and whistled as loud as I could, which worked in attracting his attention. I waved my arms to signal him to come to where I was building our house on top of the small mountain. I sat and watched as he hesitated before slowly making his way towards me. As Scar grew closer, I remained sat on top of the wall where I snickered to myself as a joke came to

mind. 

“So, how does it feel to be shorter than me for once?” I laughed, looking down at the very small Scar below me. All I got in response was Scar rolling his eyes at me. Still not friends. Got it. 

“Did you need something? Why’d you call me over here?” Scar spoke as he reached the base of the wall, crossing his arms and looking towards me with a slight glare that made my body shiver. 

“I was just, uh,” I started, watching his face for any indication of anything. Clearing my throat, I looked away to see the border of the desert again. “I had an idea for creating a defensive border protection, if you wanted to hear it.”

Scar studied me for a moment, watching as I shrunk in on myself to try and shield away from the cold stare. I knew I shouldn’t have expected him to become friendly with me again, but it felt like pure torture having this be the Scar standing in front of me at all times. After what felt like an eternity, Scar closed his eyes briefly and nodded for me to continue. I paused for a moment before deciding to climb down to talk to Scar, nervously clearing my throat. 

“Uh, well, since we’re in the only place that naturally grows the cactus plants, why don’t we plant them around the border? They’re tough to cut through and I don’t think anyone would particularly want to reach out and break them by hand…” I spoke, my voice trailing at the end as I noticed Scar’s eyes looking off to the border once again. He didn’t respond for a few minutes, but I watched as his eyes darted back and forth in a pattern, scouring the landscape in front of him as if searching for some big scheme. Eventually his eyes closed again and he sighed gently, turning his head to look back at me. 

“It’s a good idea, Grian. I’ll get to work on it, you continue the house,” Scar spoke as he turned before pausing briefly, barely turning his head to catch me in his line of sight. “You’re the better designer of the two of us.”

With those words as his parting, Scar jumped down the sand mountain and once again put his distance between us. I stood for a moment, watching as he started planning out the cactus border off in the distance, happy for the brief moment where the friendship we were once building felt not so far out of reach again. 

——————————

Stupid fucking cactus–

“OW! Fuck–“ I shouted, a stabbing pain shooting up my arm as my hand slipped against the cactus I had been moving. “There’s got to be an easier way to do this.”

I heaved the cactus into place at the border, standing it in one of the holes I had already dug along the perimeter. After filling the hole in and securing the cactus in place, I looked around to see what could be used for this process to make it easier and less painful to my beautiful skin. 

There was nothing I could possibly do, or make, that would help with this task, and as much as I thought it was a good idea, I hated Grian for leaving the task up to me. Everything about him pissed me off. I thought he could be interesting at first, maybe even slightly attractive, but then he went and killed me. I could never trust him again. As far as I knew, he was bordering on the line of being dead to me. 

I looked over to find a cactus sitting in a position close to one of the holes I had earlier prepared, so I heaved my shovel over my shoulder and walked towards it in hopes it would be an easy one to move thanks to the short distance needed.  

After what actually didn’t feel like that long of a time, the sun started to set and I realised I had been moving the cactus all day. Sighing to myself, I realised just how sore my body really was as I looked around to find I had accomplished surrounding almost the entire border. I felt proud, and realised as it was all so close to finished that Grian had been right. It was an excellent idea, and all we had to do now was work out the entrance of the land, which hopefully Grian would build. Even if the guy rocked me to my very core, red hot rage running through me every time he opened his mouth, he was skilled and he knew his way around how to design a beautiful and safe house. 

Just like I had first said when I first mentioned the prospect of a desert monopoly. Beautiful and safe. 

I shook my head, gathering myself again. I looked around to see the sun very quickly setting, so I made sure to start placing torches everywhere the darkness touched within the new border I had set in place. It was a quick and easy task, with most of the torches having already been set by Grian previously. If anything, at least the man was helpful, and even if I hated to admit it, he would be powerful. I just knew it. 

I quickly packed myself up after placing my last torches and ran up the side of the sand mountain. As I reached the top, I looked up to find that Grian had almost completely finished building the house. It was two stories, and had a beautiful rustic vibe to it that matched perfectly with the landscape. Grian was a natural builder. I shook my head, trying to clear my head and stop myself from thinking about him any further. All he was good for to me, was to be my puppet for as long as he stayed alive. If I could keep him alive for as long as possible, I could control Grian. 

I walked around to the front door, taking note of the soft lantern light surrounding the door, stepping inside to find it already semi-furnished. Grian had managed to build a table, a couple of chairs and even have beds for us both in separate spaces. Grian had given me the downstairs room, which looked significantly larger if I had to admit, while he took upstairs. The trade off for the size was that he had a balcony, but I had a back door out of my room so it was even better in my own opinion!

As I stood in the front doorway, my eyes landed on Grian who was standing at the base of the staircase, his eyes widening as he saw me. I could see his fear, and I basked in the joy I felt by his reaction to seeing me. As long as he was afraid, he was easier to control. 

“Nice job on the house, Grian.” I spoke, ducking under the entrance arch slightly before walking into the open space. 

“Oh, uh, thank you. It's not taking me as long as I thought it was going to.” Grian responded, his eyes still wide and calculating as he looked at me, his stance glued to the staircase. 

“Well, in that case, I think we need to have a quick, uh, meeting to move forward, seeing as I have almost completed the boundary myself.” I spoke as I clapped my hands, motioning to the table set in the middle of the room, inviting Grian to sit with me. 

Grian stood for a second, hesitating and unsure about what was about to happen, but as I glanced back towards him I watched his expression shift to one that was unreadable. He let go of the staircase railing, moving slowly towards the table and taking a seat opposite me. He sat, watching me but not once opening his mouth. 

“Alright, well I’ll start,” I began, chuckling slightly as I leant my elbows onto the table in front of me. “So, we’ve both basically completed our tasks. Now, it’s my turn to tell you what to do. After all, you are in my control.”

I paused my speech for a moment, watching Grian as his expression shifted, but this time only for a moment. Why is he not reacting? What’s wrong with him?

“Alright, firstly, I want you to build a proper entrance way through the cactus for us. Secondly, I want you to build a moat of lava on the inside border of the cactus. If someone was to attempt to break in, that will stop them. Thirdly–“ I paused, watching as Grian’s breathing shifted to a faster pace, his eyes looking like they were spiralling even if he was trying to make himself look fine. God damn it. “Thirdly, think of a name for this place.”

Grian shifted his eyes up to meet mine again, this time the shock evident on his face. I smirked slightly, feeling satisfaction in his reaction, before standing up from the table and walking towards my bedroom. I paused in the doorway of my room, looking back towards Grian slightly from the corner of my eye to see him watching after me. I smirked, realising he hadn’t seen me look back yet, which begged the question of what he was exactly looking at, when his eyes flashed up to my face. I shit him a wink before walking into the shadow of my room, shutting the door behind me. 

I sighed as I collapsed onto the bed in the corner of the room. I hadn’t cared to turn on any sort of light, the torch line from outside shining in was enough for me. I had never needed much light. I was used to walking in the dark alone. I sighed, rolling over to sit up properly, unlacing my boots and shifting out of my shirt. I knew I wasn’t going to sleep any time soon, so I stood up with my boots still loosely on my feet, my hand finding the pack of smokes I had smuggled in from the outside world. It’s not like I smoked all the time or anything, but they helped on nights like this where my mind wouldn’t stop racing. 

I stepped out the back door of my bedroom, shuffling under what I assumed to be the floor of Grian’s balcony, where I found a chair sitting outside for me. 

“You should install some chairs out here.”

I shook my head, clearing the thought of my previous conversation with the blonde man, and sighed as I sat in the rough wooden chair, lighting a match as I placed a cigarette in my mouth. As I raised my hand to the cigarette to begin lighting it, my hand paused as my ears pricked at the slight sound I had heard. I shook my hand, extinguishing the match and pulling the cigarette out of my mouth again as more noise sounded out, this time coming distinctly from above. I raised my head as footsteps rang out above me. I sighed as I realised I was safe, once again moving to light my cigarette. 

I sat there in silence for a minute, my eyes closed as I basked in the open air when a sigh rang out from above me. 

“What have I gotten myself into? How could I have ruined everything for myself so quickly?” I heard a soft voice speak above me. I froze, softly exhaling the drag of my smoke when I realised Grian didn’t know I was here. Before I could even make any move to try to back inside and give Grian privacy, I heard his voice again, and my body remained frozen. 

“One little mistake and I ruined the only friendship I had going for myself here. The only friendship I had going for myself anywhere.” Grian sighed. He was silent for a while longer where I decided to give him some real privacy, retreating back into my room to try and get some sleep before the next day. 

He did this to himself.