Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The world was muffled, like wet cotton packed into his ears. Everything felt fuzzy and distant, like reality was a million miles away. Everything except for that goddamned leak. He couldn’t tell if it was coming from the ceiling or the far wall or from inside his own, aching head. But it had been going on forever.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Every heartbeat throbbed in Kakashi's head like a hammer against his skull, each pulse pounding up through his neck. It lodged behind his eye, a sharp stabbing that erased every thought he tried to form. Kakashi tried to blink but regretted it instantly when whitehot fire flashed across his forehead and down his head. 

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The pressure of suppressed chakra didn’t help his headache or the tightness in his muscles. His Sharingan was trapped closed, as useless as Kakashi himself. Though, at least he didn’t have to worry about losing more chakra. 

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

A deep throb radiated up from the base of his neck, spiderwebbing through his head. He wanted to move, to find a way to take weight off his injured hip, but he couldn’t. It took all he had to push a wad of congealed blood past his lips, giving his burning tongue a break from the coppery tang. 

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Cold pressed against Kakashi’s bare torso and a shiver raced through his body. The minor twitch sent lightning through his spine and nausea through his gut. Around him, the world spun violently left. Everything else tilted with it, walls warping and shadows bending. His stomach lurched and he bit down on his abused tongue again. 

He tried to swallow the bile before it could climb his throat. It just as stung as badly on the way down. Letting a breath out his nose hurt. 

His head throbbed.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

“K-Kakashi Hatake. 009720. A-AN-ANBU jonin,” he stuttered out, trying to ground himself.

The words had worked when he was young. Kakashi only had vague memories of being held by Cloud shinobi. It had been after Rin but before Minato-sensei. Kakashi had been reckless, young and suicidal. He’d thrown himself into the fight, given his team time to escape and ended up locked in a cell, muttering his ID number and rank under his breath like he’d been taught. 

Minato-sensei had been livid. The elders had been less than impressed that the newly minted Hokage and vanished from the village, arriving in the Kumo holding cell with all the pent of rage of a man that had lost everything. Kakashi had only been there for a few hours before Minato-sensei destroyed half a building.

But there was no Minato-sensei to save him this time.

“K-Kakashi Hatake. 009720. A-AN-ANBU jonin.” 

Across the cell, the man in the orange mask giggled at him. It was a high, sharp sound that sent stabbing waves of agony through Kakashi’s head. He squeezed his eyes closed, trying to swallow the sickness at the base of his throat.

“Drip, drip, drip,” the man in the orange mask tapped his finger in tandem with the steady leak. “Bet that’s driving you nuts, huh?”

You’re driving me nuts. Kakashi barely managed to bite down on his tongue and hold the words in. His brain turned in slow circles, words trying to slip past his lips without his permission. Concussions were a pain in the ass. Throughout his career as an ANBU captain, Kakashi had a lot of concussions and he always ended up slurring out information that he shouldn’t have. 

But not this time.

This time he had to keep his mouth shut.

This time, Naruto was on the line. 

“I thought you were going to be more of a challenge. There have been all sorts of tales about you. The Copy Ninja. Genius Kakashi of the Sharingan. You don’t seem all that tough.” Another sharp giggle. “Turns out you’re just kind of soggy.”

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

“I wonder if the fox is soggy too. He’s yours, right? Well, I guess we’ll know soon.” The grating giggle stabbed into Kakashi’s temples. “It’s really pathetic, isn’t it? You let yourself be captured because you thought you could protect him and you just ended up being bait to catch him.” 

Kakashi’s heart tightened, squeezing until a growl crawled up his throat. His lip curled upward and he was sure his canines flashed. For the first time in his life, he was grateful his mask was missing. Looking in the mirror had been hard since his father died and between his mask and his hatai-ate it was easy to forget they looked so similar. It had started out as a way to keep Kakashi from being overstimulated by his Inuzuka laced senses when he was young - one of the only things he’d gotten from his mother - but became a mask to protect him from memories of his father once he’d gotten older. 

But, at this moment, Kakashi wanted to look like his father. Wanted to look as intimidating as the man that had once made entire shinobi villages tremble. Wanted his message to be clear, concussed or not. 

Touch my pup and die.

“Is that what the mask is supposed to hide? Sharp teeth?” The Akatsuki member sounded disappointed. “Bor-ing! Or is it a cute little mole? It really does make you less scary than the White Fang, you know? Hmm, oh.”

Kakashi didn’t need to see the bastard’s face to know he was smiling. He could hear it in that high pitched, child like tone. 

“Is that it? Do you not want anyone to know that you look like Daddy?”

Kakashi couldn’t hide the wince that wracked him.

Another round of giggles left him. “Oh, that is it! Hmm, well, I can see why you wouldn’t want them to mix you two up. After all, the White Fang was a hero, wasn’t he? Do you think he’d hate you as much as the rest of your village does, Friend Killer? Maybe that’s why he did it. He could tell you’d grow up to be a monster.” 

“Your mother would be so proud of you.”

“Daaaad.”

“She would be. You’re so much like her, Kashi.”

“Jiraiya-jiji says I’m like you.”

“Hmm, in some ways. But in most, you are your mother’s son.” 

“I am?”

“Hmm mmm. She was brave like you. And she always knew what was best. And she had an attitude far larger than she was.”

“Daaaaad.”

The ghost of his father’s voice lingered in his ears. Briefly, Kakashi wondered if his mother would still be proud of him or if she’d dislike him as much as his father did. If she’d hate him as much as he hated himself.

“Hey, did I break you?” 

A finger poked against Kakashi’s temple and he flinched as pain flared. 

“Oh, nope, you’re still alive! That’s good. Itachi-san was right. We need you alive if we want the jinchuriki to come for you.” 

They wouldn’t. 

At least, Kakashi hoped they wouldn’t. He hoped that Gai and Asuma would bring Naruto back to the Leaf, where Jiraiya could find him and take care of him. Or, maybe Tsunade would. She seemed to have been taken with him after their meeting years ago. Jiraiya said she still asked about him on occasion. 

Maybe Kakashi should have been jealous. Somehow, the two godparents that had never loved him had come to care about Naruto. But he wasn’t jealous. He was grateful. Kakashi had never been worth saving, worth caring about. That wasn’t their fault, it was his. But Naruto, Naruto deserved the world. Deserved the Sannin, the two legendary shinobi that could protect him. 

Please, Kakashi thought, even if you could never love me, love him. Protect him. Please.

The funny thing about stories was they always told you what to do when you raise the hero. You encouraged them, supported them, taught them strength and honor. Sometimes you died for them. Sometimes you lived for them. But, no matter what, when you raised a hero, you taught them life lessons. It was a simple road map really. Anyone could follow it. 

But no story told you want to do when the hero you raised decided to become the villain. There were no maps for this. No scrolls or stories that told you how to face the child you failed.

Jiraiya hadn’t come to the Land of Rain looking for Konan and Nagato but he’d found them all the same. 

The dogs growled as they held down Gamaken and Jiraiya gritted his teeth. If he was unable to fight then Jiraiya had no hope of summoning the two great Sages. He'd need another plan. But plans took time.

Anything thing stories never prepared you for. Time was an abstract in writing, it was what made tension so difficult to write. But now, time was ticking, tension filled the air, and Jiraiya didn't have time to make a new plan.

So he'd just have to make some more time.

And that was easy enough.

"I really am impressed you can summon so many of them," Jiraiya praised, wondering if Nagato was close enough to hear him. He needed to keep his voice light. Nagato didn't need to know about the tight grip despair and guilt had on his chest. He needed to think Jiraiya was perfectly in control of his emotions. "But the to the Great Hermit Sage of Mount Matoboku, you're nothing but a snack."

The inside of the toad digested the dog creatures in seconds, leaving Jiraiya and Gamaken to regroup. With any luck, Nagato would reveal himself in the confusion. Gamaken seemed grateful for the break, shaking himself off. Chakra pulsed as his wounds began to inch closed.

Nagato and his lizard summon reappeared and Jiraiya's lips quirked in a smile. He'd taught them well, but their separation was still peeking through.

"You're still just a rookie kid!"

The lizard tried to vanish as they reappeared but Gamaken's staff caught them around the neck. And then they poofed out of existence.

Damn it.

Sakumo entered his mind as he moved. It was a terrible time but Jiraiya’s oldest friend had the strangest ability to do that, find his way into Jiraiya’s thoughts at bad time. He’d laughed the first time Jiraiya had showed him how to gather energy for Sage mode, eyes lit up with a joy Jiraiya had never seen in his son’s. 

“That’s how they have you gather energy?” Sakumo had sounded so fascinated. “So strange! Doesn’t it take too long?”

“Huh? What do you mean? It takes as long as it takes! How else would you gather nature energy?” 

Sakumo had looked amused but waved a dismissive hand. “I’ll show you one day,” he’d said. “Next time we’re on a mission together.”

“Next time? Why can’t you just show me now?”

“You’ll see.”

And he had. Sakumo’s version of Sage mode had nothing to do with sitting still. It demanded action, movement and strength. It had taken seconds for Sakumo to gather the energy he needed for yellow eyes and sharp fangs. 

In moments like this, hands clasped together uselessly as he tried to concentrate on gathering energy and fleeing for his life at the same time, Jiraiya wished he could have achieved Sage mode the same way. 

Another summon popped into existence. Why? It made no sense. Why did Nagato keep bringing summons to the fight instead of assaulting Jiraiya directly? Was it a weakness he could exploite - was his old student afraid of him? Or did Nagato just think he wasn’t worth the effort?

The latter thought caused a pang of insult to make its way through Jiraiya’s chest. Could Nagato possibly think so little of him - the Great Toad Sage? Jiraiya couldn’t take that insult standing still. He refused to. 

“Gamaken,” Jiraiya said, as the energy pulsed through him. Any second now Sage mode would take over. Fukasaku and Shima would likely be surprised - and in Shima’s case unimpressed - to be called so suddenly, but to stop Nagato it would be worth it. “Go home. I’ve got it from here.”

This kid was done insulting him. 

The bull summon rammed into Jiraiya’s barrier just as it went up. Together, they exploded through the wall, creating a new tunnel through the ground. Perfect. Now Nagato wouldn’t see any of it coming. 

Fukasaku and Shima arrived with their usual amount of fanfare, Shima scolding him for bringing her to “rowdy” places. Jiraiya would have felt bad if it wasn’t for the danger looming before them. Naguto’s plan was horrifying and would never turn out the way he thought it would. Those created by hatred rarely did. Living in fear didn’t force people to grow up, it forced them to grow desperate. Grow apart. 

That’s why no story ever ended with the message of “always hate, create fear”. Those strategies had been tried again and again. And they’d never once worked. 

Sage, if only he could have taught Nagato that lesson properly. 

The air shifted. Unease spilt through Jiraiya’s blood even with Fukasaku and Shima there to help him. Something was wrong. He could taste it in the air. Nagato stared down at him, breeze whipping his orange hair from side to side. His hands moved, seals forming to call another summon and Jiraiya readied himself.

People appeared. Humans.

Five of them. 

All orange hair.

All with rinnegan. 

Jiraiya’s breath caught as he looked up at them, his gaze landing on the man standing in the middle. It was impossible. He didn’t have the rinnegan. But even if he did…

“Yahiko?” Jiraiya blinked before turning to Nagato. If it was truly Nagato at all. “What’s going on here? You said Yahiko-”

“That pain in your eyes,” Yahiko’s lips moved but it was Nagato’s voice that came out, “perhaps you’re already beginning to understand. Yahiko has been dead for quite some time.”

The water beneath Jiraiya’s feet rippled. Another cold breeze whipped across his face. Yahiko had never looked so blank before. He had always been so full of life, eager excitement to try, to train, to prove himself. 

“Just what the hell are you?” Jiraiya growled.

“We,” Yahiko’s body said, “are God.”

They moved fast. Too fast and fluid to be puppets. Not that Nagato had ever shown any ability in puppet jutsu. Everytime Jiraiya evaded one attack, the next was there. And every time he thought he had the drop on them, they moved. 

Too quick.

Too effortless.

Without setting eyes on him, they would dodge away from his attack.

Almost as if they could see him at all times. 

“They can see through each other’s eyes,” Fakasaku said. 

It had to be right. It was the only way they could dodge this easily. And it would make sense. How would Yahiko have Nagato’s rinnegan? Was that Nagato to begin with? It didn’t look like Nagato. People changed as they got older but not that much. The person Jiraiya had been speaking to all this time bore no resemblance to Nagato apart from his eyes. 

Desperately, Jiraiya forced his mind to work as they continued. 

He sent Shima with the limited information he’d gathered to find Tsunade. Even if it wasn’t everything, it was a start. If he didn’t make it back.

The hero of the story always made it back but Jiraiya had never been naive enough to believe himself a hero. He was a mentor perhaps. A coward without a doubt. But a hero, no. There was no plot armor for him. 

No plot twist to come and save him from this reality.

The reality that Yahiko wasn’t the only body in this fight that he knew. All of these men were familiar except for their eyes. Nagato’s eyes. 

How had they gotten Nagato’s eyes? 

Unless.

The realization hit him at the same time one of them erupted from the water beneath him. A hand slammed into his throat and Jiraiya tasted bloody from the impact. Pulling in a breath was a struggle. A crushed windpipe. 

That was bad.

Almost as bad as the metal rods that slammed into his back. 

His cheek smashed into the ground. 

Fakasaku’s voice muffled, as though under water. He wanted Jiraiya to stand up. To fight back. But he couldn’t. Every ounce of strength leaked from him and no one was coming to save him now. 

A shame.

People talked a lot about the regrets you lived with but no one really talked about the regrets you died with. 

Is this how you felt, Sarutobi-sensei? Full to the brim with regrets and dying at the hands of one of your students? Someone you once believed in so much?

Jiraiya had trained so many different students.

Lost so many students. 

He thought so many different kids were the child of prophecy. But, in his dying moments,  Jiraiya was done thinking. Now he knew. Changing the world started with changing one person and Jiraiya had never met anyone who could change Kakashi Hatake. Not until Naruto. That kid changed everyone he met. 

So Jiraiya was done thinking. 

He knew now that Naruto Uzumaki was the child of Prophecy. He just had to hope that his death didn't turn the kid into the villain of his own story.

"You!"

The blackness of Jiraiya's vision faded into a familiar room. Books lined the walls, fluffy blankets were thrown over the couches and arm chairs, and a fire crackled in the hearth. It was warm and familiar.

How many times had he sat in this room with his closest friends, basking in the warmth and trading tales?

"I should gut you where you stand, you lying bastard!"

Masaka looked as she always had, honey blonde locks framing her face and almost hiding the sharp red of the Inuzuka marks on her cheeks. Her blue eyes blazed, lip pulled back to reveal the sharp canines. The mole under her left eye crinkled.

Kakashi always looked like Sakumo, his dark eyes and his untamable silver hair. But those canines and that small mole he kept hidden beneath his mask, those belonged to his mother. And so did the radiating killing intent Jiraiya had felt before Kakashi had vanished in the hashiran. The same killing intent he felt now.

Jiraiya held his hands up in the attempt at a placating gesture. "Masaka, now wait a minute."

"Shut up!" Masaka's face twisted, canines glinting in the low firelight. "You promised me you would take care of them! Of Kakashi!"

Jiraiya flinched. He'd never had the pleasure of hearing his first godson's name from his mother's voice. She'd whispered it to Sakumo as she faded but that was long before Jiraiya had made it back to the village. He had always imagined it said softly, sweetly, and full of love. To hear it snarled, full of pain and anguish - the only thing she'd given the child she'd loved so much - was a knife in Jiraiya's chest.

Tears sparkled in Masaka's blue eyes. She'd never been a crier. In all the years Jiraiya had known her, he'd never once seen her cry. Not even in the war.

"I know," Jiraiya whispered. "I know, Masaka. I-I'm a coward."

He was and he always had been. It was the reason he hadn't gone back for Naruto. He couldn't look at the young boy and see the student he'd failed every day. So he'd forced Kakashi to do it instead.

Because Jiraiya couldn't look at the broken man his first godson had become either. He couldn't stand the thought of watching Kakashi become Sakumo - depressed. Alone.

Masaka let out a sob. Her hair fanned around her as she hit her knees, face buried in her hands. "I trusted you," she wept. "I trusted you and Tsunade to look after my boys. How could you?"

Jiraiya looked away, hands clenching into fists. "I wish I could fix it."

"You care for him like you cared for me?"

Even days later, Jiraiya could hear it. The crack in Kakashi's voice. The pleading. The raw hurt.

I do care for you, Jiraiya should have said. I love you.

He did. He loved both of his boys, even if he was hopeless at showing it. Jiraiya would have moved mountains to protect them. He should have moved mountains to protect them.

"I wish," Jiraiya whispered. "I wish I could change it. I wish..."

I wish I wasn't here with you now.

I wish I wasn't dead. 

Chapter Text

The stench of burnt flesh and scorched ozone lingered in the air. Naruto’s stomach churned as he looked around the wreckage. Black scorch marks spider webbed across the pale sand, as if lighting had clawed its way out of earth from the depths of hell. Shuriken and kunai lay scattered, glinting in the dying sunlight. But there were only two bodies.

Despite the nausea bubbling at the base of his stomach, Naruto took comfort in the sight. Both of them were the Akatsuki members that had been killed earlier. Red spilled out around the pieces of the blood and the puppet master’s fake body lay cracked and scorched.

Kashi wasn’t there. 

It made Naruto’s chest lighten and squeeze at the same time. Kashi was alive - he had to be. But he wasn’t waiting for Naruto. 

“There’s scorch marks everywhere.” The pink haired girl - Sakura’s - voice startled him and he turned to find her staring down at the half scorched ground. “But they’re perfectly round. I didn’t think a jutsu would be able to do that.” 

Beside her, the dark haired boy - Sasuke - squatted down to frown, his fingers brushing one of the marks. “The edges branch out like lichtenburg figures. It was likely from a lightning jutsu.” 

Kashi, Naruto’s gut told him. Those marks had to be from Kashi. 

He stared out at the darkened spots, watching them bounce from spot to spot. Displaced sand and glistening pieces of fulgurite scattered the ground near the scorch marks, half-sunk into the sand like glittering gravestones. 

Gaara and Kashi had lots of those when they sparred together. The burning blue of Kashi’s chidori colliding with Gaara’s sand to create strange but beautiful twisting lumps of glass. 

“Focus,” Kurama told him. “There’s something strange here. The chakra is wrong.”

“Strange chakra?” Naruto echoed. 

Kurama hummed. “Close your eyes and focus.”

With his eyes closed, the frayed ozone stunk. It burned his nose, poking at his lungs. The coppery tang of blood lingered against his tongue. Sand rustled softly, a dry breeze ghosting over his skin. 

Threads. Thin, pulsing, ghosting through the air like spider silk. They trembled, tugging faintly at his senses. Naruto let out a breath, a tang of sulfur clinging to his mouth. The sharp bite of fireworks gone wrong. Beneath it was the slow, wrong beat of something. It wasn’t alive, not anymore. A chakra that had pooled and had forgotten how to move, swamp water that festered under a hot summer.

Something old and agonized. Something that had been slayed and wanted only to leave pain and suffering in its wake. 

Naruto followed the threads, shoving down the screaming instinct of no, wrong, run. The blonde’s body sat in pieces, red splashed across the pale sand. His robes were in tatters, singed and blackened. Spatters of white clay lay across the sand, weeping into the soft brown as though mourning its user. 

The threads tugged him down and he knelt, fingers sinking into the sand. “What are you doing?” Sasuke called.

Naruto ignored him, his eyes locked on the pull of the thread. Grains of sand scraped under his nails, grinding against his skin until it felt raw as he dug. Every scoop he tore free spilled away before he could clear it away, the thread’s hole collapsing in a dry whisper. Gritting his teeth, Naruto sat back and glared at the hot earth beneath him. 

Digging was pointless like this. The loose grains would just keep filling in the hole.

“Sand is fine, Naruto. That’s why they use it to measure time. No matter how hard you try, you can’t ever move it.” Kashi had told him once. It was after they’d been caught in a sandstorm on their way to see Gaara. Naruto had been covered in sand, itchy, uncomfortable and annoyed. 

“So how do you get rid of it?” Naruto had whined, itching desperately at his back.

Kashi had laughed, soft but bright, his eyes closed in a smile. “I wonder.”

“Aw, Kashi, come on! I’m so itchy!”

Still laughing, Kashi had leaned forward, pulled his mask down, and blown as hard as he could in Naruto’s hair. Little grains of sand had tumbled out of Naruto’s hair, settling on his shoulder and Kashi had given him a wink as he pulled his mask back up.

“Oh.” Naruto had pouted up at his dad. “That’s not fair, Kashi. I’m not smart enough to think of stuff like that!”

“It’s not about being smart, Naruto,” Kashi had told him patiently. “It’s about being creative. That’s all geniuses are. And you’re one of the most creative kids I know.”

“Creative, huh, Kashi?” Naruto muttered. “Alright. I can be creative for you.” 

Naruto let his hand hover over the thread and breathed. Chakra built in his palm, pouring out in small, gentle wisps. Beneath him, the sand began to move. Small grains caught the wind, swirling around in a small tornado of sand and chakra. 

“Naruto!” From behind the building sand tornado, Sakura and Sasuke shouted for him.

He ignored them, his gaze locked on thread. It was under there. Whatever this strange, agonizing chakra was, it was down there. And Naruto had to find it. 

Silver caught the light as the sand shifted. Then pale skin. A single finger with a ring on it. And the threads of chakra pulled at the ring, wrapping around it. Naruto reached for it, pulling the ring free, and the sand collapsed back to the ground with a soft pattering. 

The ring’s top was green, the single kanji 青 standing out in start black. A chill settled over him as he looked down at it, the chakra flicking against him. Something that remembered how to breathe but had forgotten how to live. 

“What is it?” Naruto whispered.

Kurama’s chakra shuddered and then swirled. Wisps of orange leaked from Naruto for the first time since he and Gaara had been attacked over a day ago and Kurama’s chakra form took over. His single tail flicked uncomfortable as he stared down in the ring, lip lifting at the corners. 

“The chakra,” he huffed, “it’s unnatural.”

Naruto nodded. Now that the ring sat in his hand, Naruto could feel the stinging against his skin, like the chakra poked every pore with invisible pins, some made of fire and others made of ice. 

“Naruto!” Sakura’s voice was sharp and scolding. “Warn us next time, will you? I’m covered in sand.”

Glancing up at them, Naruto blinked in surprise. Both his companions were covered in a thin dusting of sand. Sasuke’s black hair had turned a pale brown and he was scratching at his scalp. Beside him, Sakura was shaking herself and glaring at him.

“Sorry,” Naruto said as he stood. “I had to find it.” 

“Find what?” Sasuke asked.

Sakura’s glare didn’t lessen. “You still could have warned us. I thought you were being kidnapped. You’re on a team now. You have to tell us stuff.” 

Did he?

He and Kashi were a team and they rarely had to speak. Silence was one of a shinobi’s greatest allies, especially in the heat of battle. If they had to yell to each other, the enemy would know what they were doing. 

“Do you guys have to explain your plans to each other?” Naruto asked. “That’s so weird. Kashi n’ I never have to explain what we’re doing. We just do it and then it works.

The two Leaf-nin looked confused. They glanced at each other, as though Naruto had said something completely insane. 

“Never mind,” Sasuke said, stepping forward. “What did you find?”

Naruto held the ring up for them to see. The warm, ghostly weight of chakra settling over his shoulders warmed his neck as Kurama leapt up, his single tail form settling around Naruto. Both Leaf-nin started and stumbled back, eyes wide. 

“What is that?” Sakura said, hand splayed across her chest.

Sasuke stood slightly in front of her, one arm hovering as though to block an attack from reaching her. Naruto blinked following their line of sight. They had no interest in the ring leaking strange chakra. Instead, both of them were staring at something over his shoulder. He turned in a circle, trying to figure out what he was missing. All he could see was the desert landscape.

“Idiot,” Kurama huffed, his tail flicking up to hit Naruto’s nose. “They mean me.”

“You?” Naruto glanced down at him before looking back at Sakura and Sasuke. “You mean, Kurama?”

“Kurama?” Sakura asked. She tried to inch forward, but Sasuke’s arms stopped her. “Is he a-a summon?”

Kurama grumbled at the suggestion and Naruto shook his head.

“It’s the Nine-Tails,” Sasuke answered for him. “Isn’t it?” 

“Yeah.” Naruto smiled, bringing up his hand to feel the warmth of Kurama’s chakra. “He wants to help us find Kashi.” 

At that, Kurama didn’t grumble. It was strange, normally he would make a show of insisting he didn’t care what happened to Kashi. But he hadn’t made a single complaint since they’d left the Sand. It felt wrong and caused Naruto’s stomach to shift uncomfortably. If Kurama wasn’t making a production out of insisting Kashi was fine, should Naruto be more concerned? 

Kurama’s tail swished in front of his face again, pulling him out of his thoughts. Sakura and Sasuke were staring at them, bodies tense and uncertain.

“Uh, what’s wrong?” Naruto asked.

Neither of them answered, both staring at Kurama. From his shoulder, Kurama let out a long huff.

“I destroyed their village, Naruto,” he muttered. “Remember?”

“Oh, right.” Naruto often forgot that Kurama had rampaged in the Leaf village, killing many people. Including his birth parents. But it was so hard to remember. To think that Kurama would do something like that, so lost in rage and loneliness that his only option was to fight his way out. 

Naruto wasn’t naive. He knew Kurama had done bad things. But, he supposed, any prisoner would. And that was all Kurama had ever been at the Leaf, a prisoner held to use as leverage against the other Hidden Villages. Trapped in jinchuriki after jinchuriki, told to shut up and stay imprisoned. Away from the world. Away from his friends. 

“Kurama doesn’t need to do things like that anymore,” Naruto told the Leaf-nin.

“Doesn’t need to do things like that?” There was an edge to Sasuke’s voice. “No one needs to slaughter people.”

“You do when you’re a prisoner,” Naruto replied with a shrug.

They stared at him.

“Kurama didn’t want to be stuck in the Leaf,” Naruto told them. “He got locked inside someone against his will. Of course he’d try to get away when he could. Prisoners of war always do.” 

“The nine-tails isn’t a prisoner of war,” Sakura sputtered after a minute.

“Well, he isn’t anymore.” Naruto smiled, letting Kurama’s chakra bump against his fingers. “He’s free now, just like me. Kashi freed us.” 

The two Leaf-nin stared at Naruto like he was speaking a foreign language. Their gazes flickered from Naruto to Kurama and back again. After a long stretch of silence, Kurama huffed and stared back, his tails flicking in annoyance. But something bled from him like smoke from a dying fire. It curled, bitter and slow around Naruto. Sorrow leaking in ragged threads, heavy and hollow. 

Regret. 

Apologizes that Kurama seemed to know might be heard but never accepted. 

Don’t apologize, Naruto focused the thoughts into his own chakra, trying to pulse back warmth and love. Don’t apologize for surviving. I’m glad you’re here.

“I want nothing to do with your village,” Kurama grumbled, his ears pining back. “Just help us find Kakashi and you’ll never have to worry about me again.” 

Neither of the Leaf-nin looked convinced. Sakura’s hands curled into fists at her sides, her eyes sharp as she stared at Kurama. At her side, Sasuke pursed his lips, jaw set. Their suspicious cut like a sharpened kunai. 

Anger rose fast, hot and choking. Naruto forced it down, swallowing it like broken glass. Yelling wouldn’t do him any good. People never listened when you yelled or attacked them. And it wasn’t really anger Naruto was feeling anyway. Kashi taught him a long time ago that the building fire up from his stomach wasn’t anger. It was love. The wild urge to guard what was his, to defend Kurama with everything he had. 

“Anger and hatred are cut from the same cloth,” Jiraiya once told him. “Both of them are love turned feral. One just doesn’t know how to be tamed again.” 

Naruto grit his teeth. “Kurama isn’t some monster,” he told the Leaf-nin, his voice trembling with the effort to keep steady. “He isn’t. Yeah, he killed people and I’m not saying that’s right. But the Leaf isn’t innocent either. They hurt him first. They trapped him and used him and called him a weapon. Two wrongs don’t make a right. I get that. But he shouldn’t be hated for freeing himself. He shouldn’t have to be a monster for trying to make himself safe. Everybody deserves a chance to be free.” 

Kurama’s chakra pulsed around him, calm and steady. There was a bone deep exhaustion in it, a knowledge that no matter what Naruto said, the Leaf would always hate him.

The red hot love flared again. 

“You can’t trap someone, try to make them a tool, and then hate them for fighting back.” Naruto’s chest clenched as he glared at Sakura and Sasuke. “How many people has your village killed to make sure they stayed safe?” 

Both of them finally looked away, their gazes dropping to the ground. 

Naruto looked away too, his gaze dropping to the pulsing ring in his hand. It tugged hard against him, trying to lead him somewhere. They’d already wasted so much time arguing over this. And it was time they didn’t have to waste.

“Kurama isn’t the Nine-Tails. He’s just Kurama. If you guys don’t want to help him, fine. Go back to the Sand. We’re gonna find Pervy Sage and save Kashi.” 

Kurama nipped his ear, soft and fond, a silent thanks. Naruto ignored it. He didn't need Kurama's thanks. He just needed the white hot fire in his chest to ease as he turned his back on the Leaf-nin and stared down at the ring.

“Whaddya think it is?”

“Whatever it is, it belonged to one of the Akatsuki,” Kurama hummed. “That's who has Kakashi and who the Pervert was searching for.”

Naruto nodded, pulled in a deep breath and took a step in the direction of the tug. Sand shifted behind him. Sasuke and Sakura had stepped after him, both wearing pinched looks of confusion. 

“I said I'd help you find Kaka-sensei,” Sasuke said in answer to a question Naruto hadn't asked. His gaze lingered on Kurama. “And I guess… if he wanted to kill us, he would have already.”

Sakura nodded hesitantly. 

Not perfect, but enough. A fragile truce. 

Healing took time. And knowing people, Naruto supposed. 

“Right.” He nodded at them before turning his attention to the horizon. “Let's get going.”

Naruto always hated it when it rained. The villagers he met in his travels used to love the rain. They talked about how everything smelled light and reborn. But, thanks to Kurama, Naruto knew better. 

Rain held. It sucked up the scent of every dying plant and animal and held it in the air. A sticky blanket of rot that draped around them. 

“Don't,” Kurama warned when Naruto's mind wandered toward what the rot could be coming from. His chakra tail snapped in front of Naruto's nose. “Focus on finding the old man.”

“Yeah,” Naruto replied.

The pouring rain flattened his hair against his head as he and the others walked. In the distance, he could see the gate of the village. His heart thudded in his chest, the ring tugging harshly as though eager to reach the village beyond.

In the distance, red filled the air, followed by dark smoke. Around them, the air trembled. 

“What was that?” Sakura gasped from behind him. 

The bridge beneath Naruto's feet trembled. Around them, the air continued to vibrate, clashing as more smoke erupted. On the horizon, along the tall buildings, Naruto could see small figures darting through the air. 

A familiar chakra danced on the wind, the rain threatening to weigh it down. It was usually so calm and steady, despite the faint static that always bounced around on it. But now, Naruto could sense the untamed storm within it, the weight of water threatening to drown those against it. 

Pervy Sage. 

He was here.

“Naruto, wait!” Kurama protested sharply but Naruto ignored him. 

His feet moved, bounding toward the gate. The ring pulsed in his hand, pressing against something as he raced forward, jumping over the blockade without a thought. Feet slapped against the wet pavement behind him, Sakura and Sasuke hot on his heels. 

The village was almost deserted. Somewhere in the distance, people were screaming in terror but the streets Naruto raced through were empty and still. The earth quaked as they moved, pieces of buildings collapsing in on themselves as Pervy Sage's battle continued. 

Naruto ignored the hollow drop in his stomach as he ran, the sensation of missing a step on the stairs. But it would leave him. It was the wrong feeling. Naruto was supposed to feel relieved. He’d found Pervy Sage and now he was one step closer to finding Kashi. But his heart fluttered, too fast and too light, like a hummingbird caught in a spider’s web. 

“Naruto,” Kurama hummed in his ear, chakra curled tightly around his shoulders. “Calm down. The pervert is alive.”

I know, Naruto wanted to snap but his voice was frozen. His godfather was strong. Kashi used to tell him stories all the time. Pervy Sage and Granny Tsunade were supposed to be the strongest shinobi in the world. So if someone was putting up this much of a fight against him, it couldn’t be good. 

I can’t lose him. Naruto grit his teeth and pushed his aching legs harder. 

Clenched in his hand, the ring kept pulling him. 

Debris rained down on them the closer they got. Naruto dodged around each piece of falling buildings, hearing the sure crunch of Sakura punching them into bits. He’d barely made it into the empty hallway of the ruined building he’d seen Pervy Sage fighting in when the ring tried to pull him backward. 

Naruto ignored it, even as it dug into his palm. He could sense it ahead, Pervy Sage’s chakra. But it was weak. Too weak, too quiet.

“Shit.” Kurama’s voice was sharp but lingered on desperate. “Naruto, let me.” 

His chakra pressed in, tight and determined. The ruined room they ran into was empty. Wet red washed across the cracked floor. A deep well of water sat around the red, blood dribbling into it slowly. 

Kurama moved before Naruto could let the scene sink in. Before he could focus on the destruction, the silence, the blood. His godfather’s blood.

Water rushed up around them as Kurama dove into the water and Kurama’s chakra engulfed their body as they swam deeper and deeper until the only light Naruto could see was what came from Kurama’s chakra. Curses filled Naruto’s head as Kurama’s frustration leaked through and they stopped swimming. 

“What are you doing?” Naruto shouted. “What’s going on? Where’s-?”

Kurama’s chakra flared. A glowing streak of orange shot past them, plunging into the dark depth. The glow illuminated something as the streak - tail, Naruto realized after a minute. It was one of Kurama’s tails - continued downward. A sinking mass, unmoving, with little drips of red leaking into the water around him from the six long poles sticking out of a dark red shit. 

Water shuddered as the tail wrapped around the body and Kurama pushed them upward. Sakura and Sasuke waited at the edge of the water when they surfaced, both of them jumping in surprise. The tail rocketed out of the water behind them and laid Jiraiya’s still form on the ruined ground beside the Leaf-nin.

A beat of silence filled the air, only broken by sloshing water as Kurama pulled them out of the depths. Sakura moved first, shooting to her feet and dropping to her knees beside Jiraiya, her hands glowing green.

“Sasuke,” she barked, “get these out of him.”

Sasuke blinked before he nodded and began to pull the black pipes out. “Is he even alive?”

“Go faster,” Sakura ordered, hands still glowing.

“Let me out,” Naruto snapped, shoving against Kurama’s chakra.

“Kit,” Kurama said gravely. 

It was a tone Naruto hadn’t heard him use before. Something deep and pitying. It made Naruto’s stomach churn and curdle as Sasuke pulled the last rod out and Sakura rolled Jiraiya onto his back. 

Naruto had never seen medical ninjutsu before but he’d seen CPR. Sakura pressed her glowing hands against his chest in a steady rhythm, pausing only to blow breathes into his bloody mouth. Sasuke stood over them, his hands clenched in fists. Kurama kept them at a distance, ignoring the pull of the ring in their hand and Naruto as he tried to shove them forward.

“Kurama!”

“You don’t need to see this.”

“Yes I do! He’s gotta know I’m here. That he’s not alone! Let me out!”

“Naruto.”

“Let me out! Let me out! Let me out!”

With a huff, Kurama released him. Naruto stumbled back into his own body, his knees weak as he made his way over. Jiraiya was still. He was never still. Kashi used to say that Jiraiya and Naruto had the same amount of energy. 

Sakura’s desperate breaths had left blood smeared across his face. Bruises had sputtered into life, dark and bloomed from his fight. Even after they fought the snake guy, he hadn’t looked like this.

“Wake up,” Naruto told him as Sakura pressed down on his chest again. “You gotta wake up. You have to!”

“Naruto,” Sasuke said carefully.

Naruto ignored him, fighting the burning in his eyes as tears formed. First Kashi. Now Jiraiya. 

No.

No, this wasn’t happening. It couldn’t. 

“Jiraiya,” he whispered. “You can’t leave me. I need you!” 

Sakura pressed her glowing hands down again, her face scrunched with determination. Jiraiya’s chest moved under her palms, each push sending a rippling through his blood-soaked shirt. The green glow of her hands flickered even as she kept pushing.

“Come on,” she hissed. “Come on.”

Naruto’s chest cracked, the small flicker of hope he’d been clinging to slowly leaking out. An empty, hollow feeling began to envelope his chest. 

“Kit,” Kurama whispered.

The softness of his tone was too much, too gentle, too comforting. Too much like a goodbye. 

Jiraiya coughed, a weak, choking noise. Water bubbled from his throat, spilling over his lips. Naruto froze, every inch of him stilling as Sakura began barking orders at Sasuke again and the two rolled Jiraiya onto his side. Sakura’s hands glowed green again as she leaned over him.

“You’re alive,” Naruto whispered. 

Jiraiya didn’t answer. He coughed again, more water trickling out from between his lips and his eyes remained closed. 

But he was alive.

Naruto hadn’t lost anyone else.

He wouldn’t lose anyone else. 

Chapter Text

The fire crackled weakly. In the chaos left behind after Pervy Sage's fight, slipping out of the Hidden Rain had been easier than Naruto expected. He was grateful. Pervy Sage was heavy. It took him and Sasuke to move the old Sage while Sakura cast a genjutsu on anyone nearby. Either she was very good at it or everyone was far too distressed by the destruction to pay close enough attention. Still, they kept the fire low. The rain had petered off as they left the border to the Land of Fire, leaving behind the sticky humidity that was somehow as cold as it was suffocating. 

Pervy Sage slept on. Sakura assured Naruto that he was alive, that he was going to be okay. Naruto still thought he looked too pale. Sure, the old pervert had never been tan to begin with but he'd never been this paper white either. Naruto hated it. 

Hated the stillness, the quiet. 

Jiraiya always moved. He laughed and danced around. He was always telling stupid stories about sages and toads and battles. He was always making Kashi sigh and shake his head or shoot a glare in Jiraiya's direction when he used "inappropriate language”. 

Now though, now he was still. The rise and fall of his bandaged chest was shallow. If he hadn't been staring at him nonstop, Naruto might have missed it. But he couldn't take his eyes away from Jiraiya.

Still and silent. 

Laid across his lap, Kurama's single tail flicked lazily. He'd lost a tail giving Sakura his chakra, grumbling for her to use it to help Jiraiya. She'd looked somewhere between surprised and uncertain but didn't reject him. 

Sasuke sat on the tree above them, his gaze locked toward the Land of Rain. It was too quiet, too humid. But too loud. Naruto's breath and heart beat in his chest. Too fast. Too angry. 

Too much.

Too much.

Too much.

“Kit,” Kurama huffed. “Calm down. He's alive.” 

Naruto bit down on his tongue, hoping the sharp sting would ground him. It only left a coppery tang in his mouth.

Everything was wrong.

Too wrong.

So wrong. 

How was he going to fix it all? 

Save Pervy Sage.

Save Kashi. 

How? 

“Naruto,” Kurama crawled up his lap to nip at his hand. “Stop.”

“I can't,” Naruto whispered. His fingers clenched around Kurama's chakra, desperate to feel the warmth and safety. “Kurama.”

Kurama's eyes looked almost sad but his chakra was steady. “Jiraiya is alive. We will find Kakashi.”

“How?”

With a long sigh, Kurama settled himself against Naruto's chest, his muzzle resting between Naruto's pectorals. “I don't know, Kit.” 

“Then why did you say we would?”

“I never know how you're going to do shit. But you always figure out how to do it anyway. I figure this is the same. You just have to calm down. Use some of those smarts the Fourth gave you.” 

The Fourth.

Minato.

His father. 

Not his dad. Never his dad.

Dads were around. Dads were there when you cried. When you scraped your knee. Kashi was his dad. 

But Minato was his father. 

And everyone said Minato had been a genius. He was the best shinobi in the world.

He'd given Naruto those smarts. Even if Naruto wasn't the best at using them, he had them.

“Quit feeling sorry for yourself,” Kurama advised. “You'll think better.” 

Sniffling, Naruto wiped away the tears already starting to form in his eyes. “Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks, Kurama.” 

“I'm always right.” 

Naruto huffed, “Not always.” 

Kurama's tail flicked. Burying his fingers in Kurama's chakra, Naruto closed his eyes and tried to think. What would Kashi do?

Start with a plan.

Kashi always started with a plan. 

Start of the plan: save Jiraiya. 

Then find out if he has any suggestions on how to fight the Akatsuki without Kurama being ripped out of him. 

Then find out where the Akatsuki Hideout was and kick all of their asses.

Then listen to Kashi yell at him for doing something so reckless, after Naruto saved his life. 

Not a perfect plan. Kashi wouldn't like it. He'd say it was too bare bones. There were too many gaps, too many variables left uncertain. But variables sucked. No one could ever really account for them because they always changed. 

Kashi was better at thinking on his feet than Naruto was. If something changed and his plan didn't work the way he thought, Kashi could turn on a dime and come up with a new plan. That wasn't Naruto's strong suit. Even if he'd grown up with the smartest man in the world, Naruto didn't grow up with Kashi's brain. And Naruto's brain didn't like details. 

They took too long and changed too often.

The simpler, the better. 

Naruto let out a long breath as the fire crackled again. 

Step one: Save Jiraiya.

Naruto's gaze moved to his godfather. He wasn't sure if he could check that step off yet or not. Kashi always told him not to count his chickens before they hatched. And he always rolled his eyes when Naruto reminded him that they didn't have any chickens to count. 

Another snap from the burning logs. Another ember that erupted out of the flames to drift into the sky and disappear into the darkening skies. A single speck of white took its place, hovering in the dark blue.

“Starlight, star bright,” Naruto mumbled. 

Kashi used to laugh when Naruto recited the nursery rhyme. But he never told Naruto to stop.

”Everyone has their own rituals.” Kashi would say, ruffling Naruto's hair.

And Naruto would make his wish with a grin. 

“Starlight, star bright.” 

“Jiraiya-sama?” 

Sakura's voice snatched Naruto's attention. He tore his gaze away from the sky to look over as Sakura leaned over Pervy Sage, her hands hovering anxiously. The blankets around his lap rustled as he moved, fingers flexing as he stirred.

“Oi, Kit,” Kurama huffed as Naruto shoved him off, scrambling to his feet. “Watch it, I'm trying to nap.” 

“Jiraiya-sama,” Sakura said softly. “Can you hear me?” 

Above them, leaves rustled softly as Sasuke stood. His dark eyes watched with interest as Naruto scrambled over to sit on Jiraiya's other side.

“Pervy Sage?“ Naruto whispered. “Hey, you awake?” 

Jiraiya's brow furrowed and he moaned, bringing one hand up clumsily to swat at Naruto. “N't now, kid,” he mumbled. “Go'd dreams.” 

His voice was weak and raspy. It sounded like someone had sent it through a paper shredder and then tried to piece back together again. But it was the best sound Naruto had ever heard. 

“Jiraiya-sama,” Sakura said patiently. “I need you to open your eyes for me.” 

Miraculously, he did. Jiraiya's eyes dragged open, blinking slowly up at Sakura for a moment. “Pretty,” the old man mumbled. “H'w'd I ge' so l'cky? Wakin' up to you.”

Sakura blinked, cheeks coloring. 

Naruto breathed out a laugh. 

They always tell stories about the light at the end of the tunnel. You died, you saw the light, you followed the light, and that was it. Jiraiya had heard story after story about what happened when you died. What to do and how to do it. 

The problem was, no one ever told him what to do when he was brought back from the dead. 

Masaka's tears lingered in his ears, like a fly that buzzed around his head as he leaned against the tree. It was a high pitched, horrible noise. His ears rang with it, even as the pretty pink haired girl - Tsunade's student. What was her name again? - prattled on about his wounds and how detrimental they could be to him. Behind her, Naruto bounced on his heels anxiously. His face was pale, blue eyes drooping with exhaustion and worry. He looked like Minato.

It wasn't often that Jiraiya saw his student anything other than happy-go-lucky. But it had happened quite a few times. When Minato would come to him after sleepless nights and look at him with watery blue eyes.

“Sensei,” he'd whisper, his voice wavering. “I don't know what to do.”

“Heroes never do,“ Jiraiya would soothe. ”But you're smart, kid. You're going to figure it out.”

The words always seemed to bring Minato some comfort. He'd sniffle softly and scrub at his eyes before he accepted Jiraiya's offer of a drink.

“Does the Hokage know you're offering your underage student sake?” Minato would ask.

“If you're old enough to die for the Leaf, you're old enough to drink her sake.”

“Don't let Sakumo-san hear you say that, Sensei. If you offer Kakashi sake, I think he'd run you through.”

“You'd think, but let me tell you, kid. Sakumo got into his fair share of trouble when he was Kakashi's age.”

“Jiraiya-sama,” the pink haired girl snapped her fingers in front of his nose.

Shit, lost in another flashback. And at the worst time. The young woman frowned at him, her brow creased with worry. 

“Did you hear what I said?” she asked. 

No, Jiraiya didn't say. He'd learned with Tsunade to never admit when he wasn't listening to a medic.

“Don't move too fast. Take it easy. Almost died,” Jiraiya replied smoothly. He'd almost died enough times to know what a medic was going to say about it.

Though, this time was different, wasn't it? Jiraiya hadn't almost died. He'd died. 

Hadn't he?

He had to of.

That was the only way he would have been able to see Masaka. She'd been dead for almost thirty years. Where else would he see her, if not in the Pure Lands.

“You promised me you'd take care of them!”

He tried to hang on to her voice. Her words had been honest, as much as they made his chest ache, and her voice had been full of the Inuzuka growl that had stolen his best friend's heart. He'd almost forgotten it. After so many years without it, Jiraiya thought he'd lost the sound of Masaka's voice. 

He clung to it now. Clung to the regret and pain it had caused to flare in his chest. 

Despite the pain, at least he still had a piece of her. 

“Jiraiya-sama.” The pink haired girl's voice grew less soft and understanding.

Shit. 

He had to stop doing that. Had to stop getting lost in flashbacks. In the sound of the voices he'd been forgetting for so long. 

What did Sakumo sound like? Had his voice been sharp and deep? Or was it more like Kakashi's - that low but soft baritone? When had he stopped remembering the sound of his best friend's voice? 

Why had he let it go? 

“Jiraiya!” 

The sharpness didn't belong in Naruto's high-energy tenor. He was always loud, full of emotion and energy, but it never cut like a freshly sharpened kunai. The sudden sting and demand. 

And he never called Jiraiya by his name.

Blinking hard, shoving all thoughts of his fallen friends aside - he needed to be aware of now. What was happening now? Naruto was here now - Jiraiya finally forced himself to look at his godson. His clothing was torn and soaked, his hands clenched in fists at his sides, and his eyes wild and wet with emotion.

And he was here. 

Here with Jiraiya and two leaf-nin - Tsunade's student and the Uchiha kid. And no Kakashi.

“Where's your dad?” Jiraiya's voice scratched against his throat. 

Even to his own ears it sounded chapped and wrong. Like he'd gargled gravel or chewed on nails. 

Naruto's jaw clenched and his eyes watered.

Jiraiya's chest tightened. 

No.

No, he couldn't do this again. Couldn't hear that someone he cared for - someone he was supposed to protect was gone. 

Masaka.

Sakumo.

Minato.

Sensei.

No more.

Please, no more. Jiraiya didn't know if he could take it. 

“Akatsuki took him.” Kurama's gravely voice answered and the chakra fox flicked his tail as he slipped through Naruto's legs to stare at Jiraiya. There was an accusation in his yellow eyes. “The brat thought he could slow them down. Now he's got himself captured.“

Relief and horror clashed in his chest, fighting for dominance like a pair of wolves fighting over the last piece of meat. They merged into a horrible sensation, nausea that sat at the base of his throat. It lingered, refusing to come up and refusing to vanish. 

Jiraiya swallowed. “But he's alive.” 

Kurama's tail snapped. Over the years, Jiraiya had learned it was his equivalent of a shrug. “His scent left with their's. Not enough blood for them to have killed him there.”

“Kurama.” Naruto sounded as sick as Jiraiya felt.

“It's a trap,” the fox continued as though Naruto hadn't spoken. “They're hoping Kit will come to them. Which,” the fox raised an eyebrow, as though wondering if Jiraiya thought for a second Naruto wouldn't go sprinting after his father, “is going to happen whether we like it or not. I'd just prefer not to get ripped out of him and sucked up. I have a reputation to hold up, you know.” 

The bored tone wasn't as effective as Kurama seemed to think it was. It fell short, his unease clear in his stance. And if Kurama was nervous, they were all in trouble. 

Huge trouble. 

Shit, if this wasn't the darkest night - the moment when the character fell to their very lowest and questioned everything they'd ever known - Jiraiya wasn't sure what was. How the hell was he supposed to help them save Kakashi when he couldn't even defeat Nagato?

His chest clenched at the thought. Those kids. Shit, what had happened to them? Nagato had been so full of life. Despite the lack of confidence, Jiraiya had always seen life in Nagato. The determination. The want - no, the need - for the world to be better than what they'd seen. 

“Hey, Pervert, are you listening?” Kurama snapped. 

No. 

No, Jiraiya hadn't been listening. Listening was hard over the sting of Masaka's voice, pitched with despair. It was hard over the agony filling Jiraiya's body, his wounds drumming dully. It was hard with the thought of his godson locked in Nagato's grasp. If Nagato's goal really was to create fear and suffering, what would he do with Kakashi? 

Hadn't he suffered enough pain? Jiraiya didn't know how much more Kakashi could manage to handle. And he shuddered to think how much “Pain” and his Akatsuki bastards wanted to put on the boy. 

No man.

No, boy. Jiraiya wasn't sure Kakashi had ever had a chance to grow beyond that. It was easy to look at age and experience and see a deadly missing-nin. But Jiraiya still looked at him and saw a bloody six-year-old sobbing over his father's dead body. As much as he put on a show for all to see, Jiraiya didn't think that scared little boy ever grew up. 

“We have to save Kashi!” It was Naruto's voice that demanded his attention, High and scared and -

“You! I should gut you where you stand, you lying bastard!”

Save Kashi.

”You promised me you'd take care of them! Of Kakashi!”

His name had sounded so anguished in her voice. A symbolism that hurt Jiraiya's soul. As though the pain in his name on his mother's tongue had foretold the agonizing life Kakashi would lead.

“Jiraiya!” Naruto's cheeks sparkled, firelight dancing off his tears as he looked at Jiraiya, eyes wide and terrified. 

And suddenly Jiraiya was looking at a nine-year-old boy again - his too small hands trembling around a too large kunai but his eyes screaming that he would do whatever it took to protect his dad. 

They had to save Kakashi.

But how? 

How could Jiraiya save one godson without sacrificing the other? 

How could he let Naruto anywhere near the people who wanted to hurt him? 

Kakashi would never forgive him. 

They were supposed to fix it, together. They were supposed to stop the Akatsuki before they could come anywhere near Naruto. 

Naruto would never be able to get close to any of the Akatsuki. Not like this. Kurama was right, he couldn't fight without the risk of the Akatsuki ripping him out of Naruto. They didn't know fully how they removed Tailed Beasts from their jinchuriki. Just that they could. 

There were so many questions. So many answers hanging too far out of his reach. But, one thing was clear, Naruto was going to find Kakashi. Nothing Jiraiya did could stop him. And, even if he did, the Akatsuki would come for Naruto eventually. And Jiraiya wasn't going to be strong enough to stop them. 

Naruto needed to get stronger. Fast. 

”Alright,” Jiraiya nodded, biting back a flinch as his head pounded in protest. “Alright, I think I have a plan.” 

There were toads. Lots of toads. Naruto had seen Pervy Sage's summons before, but never all at once. There were tons of them. And they were all hopping around, yelling and celebrating. 

He and Pervy Sage had parted ways with Sasuke and Sakura as soon as Sakura said Pervy Sage wouldn't bleed out. Pervy Sage sent them back to the Leaf with the answer to the coded message he'd sent before. And all the information he'd managed to get on Pain and the Akatsuki sealed in a little scroll. 

Both of them looked a little uneasy at the thought of going back without them. Naruto wondered if it was because they'd disobeyed their sensei. But Pervy Sage had just waved a lazy hand and promised Granny Tsunade would go easy on them. 

The thought made Naruto shudder. He knew exactly what Granny Tsunade's version of “easy” was.

The toads broke out in another round of cheers.

Naruto shouldn't be annoyed. They all thought Pervy Sage was dead and now they knew he wasn't. They had every right to be happy about that. But the thought of anyone celebrating anything right now pissed him off.

They were supposed to be helping him control Nature Chakra so he could save Kashi, not hopping around in circles and shouting about a party. There was no time to party! It had already been so long since the Akatsuki got their hands on Kashi. Too long. 

What if he was hurt? 

What if he was -

”Don't,” Kurama hissed, his voice low and sharp. Almost dangerous. 

As though the thought had crossed his mind too but he didn't want to admit it. It was an acidic parasite that latched onto him. The moment the thought bloomed, it wrapped around Naruto's brain and latched on and all he could think was what if Kashi's dead?

What if he was too late?

What if he'd already lost the only person that had ever loved him unconditionally?

”Stop,” Kurama growled again. ”He's fine. After all the shit he's survived, he'll survive this too.”

Sage, Naruto hoped so.

“Naruto,” Pervy Sage called, waving him forward.

Shoving down the little bits of resentment bubbling in his stomach, Naruto made his way over to stand beside his godfather. The old toad was small. He had white hair, a white beard, and thick white eyebrows - Naruto didn't know that it was possible for toads to have hair. He thought they were supposed to be small, slimy creatures that gave you warts when you touched them - and he leaned on a cane as he looked up at Naruto. 

“No,” the toad said.

Naruto blinked. “No? No, what?”

“No?” Jiraiya echoed. “But - Boss, please, I-”

The toad held up a hand. His yellow eyes - they were unsettling, the pupils turned the wrong way and bright yellow against his grayish green, lumpy skin - scanned Naruto again. There might have been a frown on his lips, but it was hard to tell. 

Kurama growled within Naruto's chest, his chakra wrapping around protectively. Naruto pulsed his chakra back, hoping to calm his fox. Kurama hated it when people stared at them and he'd been grumbling about toads being “lazy cold-blooded bastards” their entire trip. 

“If I trained him,” Old Man Toad said, “I'd be asking for war.” 

“War?”

Pervy Sage sounded as confused as Naruto felt. The toads weren't too afraid of Pain to help Pervy Sage fight them. Or were they worried about a different war? 

And what war? 

It didn't make any sense.

Old Man Toad let out a long sigh. “The wolves would eat us alive.” 

“Wolves?” 

”Yes. The wolves are far different than us, Jiraiya-boy. We are willing to accept those who sign our contracts and prove their strength. The wolves though, they stick to family lines. Its loyalty, their only redeeming quality taken too far. They would eat us for taking on a Hatake. Same as they'd eat anyone that wasn’t a Hatake.”

“But, but,” Naruto stuttered, his eyes widening as the words washed over him. “I'm not a Hatake. I'm Naruto Uzumaki.”

Kashi was his dad and he'd always called Naruto his kid, but that didn't make them blood. Kashi had never asked Naruto if he wanted the Hatake name and Naruto had never asked if he could have it.

He didn't think he ever would. 

Kashi was his dad but Naruto was Naruto Uzumaki. He always had been.

His name was the only thing his birth parents had given to him. And, even though he still didn't know how he felt about them... he didn't want to give up the one thing they'd ever given him.

Old Man Toad didn't look overly impressed with his answer. “Regardless of name, a Hatake has claimed you, have they not?”

“Claimed me?” Naruto echoed.

“His adoptive father,” Pervy Sage said smoothly. “Kakashi Hatake.”

Old Man Toad hummed. “Then you are a Hatake boy. Perhaps not in name but in love.”

Love. 

Kashi loved him. Naruto knew that. Kashi was the first - maybe the only person - to ever love Naruto unconditionally. Almost as naturally as breathing.

Naruto swallowed. “So this Nature Chakra, you can't teach it to me?”

“I'm afraid not.”

“Only the wolves can?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Okay. So where do I find them?” 

Old Man Toad stared at him for a minute. “You want to find the wolves?” 

“If they can teach me this Nature Chakra stuff, then yeah. It's what I need to save Kashi.” 

The toads around them all fell silent. Old Man Toad shifted uncomfortably before he raised his chin slightly. ”Their tests are dangerous, Naruto-boy. And senseless. You may wish to avoid them all together. Find another way to save your father.”

“No.” Naruto shook his head. “No, Pervy Sage said this is the best way to save Kashi. Maybe the only way. And I'm gonna save my dad. So where do I find the wolves?” 

Another long pause of quiet. Old Man Toad glanced at Pervy Sage.

A slight smile crossed his face and he shrugged. “Kid's a Hatake. They've got a stubborn streak.”

Old Man Toad sighed. “I don't know the secret path, I'm afraid, Jiraiya-boy. And, even if I did, I have no right to send people to the wolves' forest.” 

“So then how do we get there?”

“How did you come to us?”

For a minute Pervy Sage looked excited. “The summoning jutsu.” 

“Huh? But I don't have summons.” Naruto jerked a thumb at his own chest. “Just Kurama.”

”What do you mean just?” Kurama growled.

Naruto ignored him. 

“Neither did I,” Pervy Sage said, “I had the contract but I hadn't signed it yet. When I tried, I reverse summoned myself instead.” His smile faded after a moment and he shook his head. “But we don't have a contract. I'm sure Kakashi's is still with him. The kid clings onto it like a five-year-old with a teddy bear.” 

Old Man Toad frowned. “Then I'm afraid-”

“I have a contract,” Naruto interrupted. He dropped his pack on the ground and began digging through it. 

”You have a contract?” Pervy Sage asked slowly. “You just said you don't have summons.”

“I don't.” The contract was at the bottom of his pack, tucked beneath his extra clothing. Kashi had offered it to him years ago, in case he ever changed his mind about not wanting a summon. Naruto hadn't changed his mind - he doubted he ever would - but he kept it anyway. The scroll was important to Kashi, he said it had once belonged to someone precious. “I never signed it.“

Pervy Sage took the contract when Naruto offered it to him. “Then why do you have it?”

“Kashi said it was a family contract.” Naruto shrugged. “What was I supposed to do with it? Throw it away?”

Pervy Sage's brow furrowed and he opened the scroll a little, just enough to read the last name on the contract. He inhaled sharply once he read it, his fingers tightening around the scroll. 

“Pervy Sage?” Naruto inched a little closer. “What's wrong?”

Swallowing hard, his godfather shook his head and rerolled the scroll before offering it back to him. “Nothing, kid. This should work.”

“Yeah?” Naruto grinned, grabbing the scroll back. “This'll get us there?” 

Pervy Sage didn't answer him. He turned back to the Toads instead. ”Boss, thanks for your help.”

Old Man Toad frowned at him. “You can't be going with him, Jiraiya-boy. The wolves will eat you.”

“No way!” Naruto shook his scroll in the old toad's direction. “I won't let them do that!” 

“I doubt you'd have a choice. The wolves-”

“I'll be alright, Boss.” Pervy Sage bowed deeply. “The wolves and I are old friends, after all. And you know they never forget a scent.” 

“No,” Old Man Toad sighed. “I suppose they don't. Well then, Jiraiya-boy, Naruto-boy. Take care. I wish you luck in your mission.” 

Naruto grinned, his hands already moving. 

Boar.

Dog.

“Thanks for your help, Old Man Toad.“

Bird.

“Sorry we can't stick around.”

Monkey.

“But I gotta go save my dad.”

Ram.

Naruto had never been reversed summoned before but he didn't like the feeling of it. One minute, he was standing in front of the toads and the next his lungs seized like he’d sprinted a mile too fast. Wind screamed in his ears, hot and wild, dragging him forward and there was nothing there to catch him. Instead, his chakra caught on something sharp and feral, yanking him further down, down, down. 

He landed on his back. The ground was hard and cold, colder than the toad's. Around him, the air was sharp and crisp with the scent of pine floating around him. It was tinged with something else - something musty and damp. 

”Wet dog,” Kurama grumbled. “The mutts stink.”

Pervy Sage landed beside him with an “oomph”. The old man groaned, rolling onto his side. Naruto winced in sympathy. Pervy Sage wasn't even all the way healed from his fight and now he was getting thrown around in reverse summons.

The air around him was wet but pleasant, despite the smell of wet dog. Fog hung low around them, a haze floating around pine trees and a large cave opening. It was pretty, the moonlight casting a silvery glow all around them. 

“Keep your wits, Kit,” Kurama ordered. “Wolves are barbaric. And they smell.”

Naruto snorted and shoved himself to his feet. A growl split the air. It was low, dangerous, daring Naruto to move any further. He didn't. 

Claws clicked against stone as a huge wolf stepped out from the dark cavern. The wolf's eyes were so bright, they glowed blue in the pale moonlight, fur glistening white. Naruto figured the wolf was as tall as he was, if not taller. But it was hard to tell, since the wolf was standing on a ledge above him, fangs dripping saliva and bared, and Naruto stood below, only halfway to his feet.

Within seconds, more wolves appeared. All of them were varying sizes, eyes sharp and fangs bared. They didn't look happy to see him. 

“Who dares,” the first wolf growled, “enter my domain without invitation?” 

”Uh, me?” Naruto replied, holding his hands up to show he wasn't a threat.

The wolf's snarl grew. “I know that child. Who are you?”

“Oh, um, I'm Naruto Uzumaki! The toads said you could help me.” 

The wolf huffed in clear disgust. “Vial little cold-blooded beasts. How dare they send someone here without invitation?”

“Um, well, they said they couldn't train me 'cause you'd eat 'em. So I had to come here to you instead. And Pervy Sage said all I needed was a summoning contract. And I already had one, so.” 

“You had one of our summoning contracts?” the wolf demanded.

“Mother,” another of the wolves, smaller and black, crept forward, nostrils flaring. “He smells of Hatake.” 

The mother wolf stared down at him. 

Naruto blinked back. “Uh?” 

A scarred gray wolf leapt down as well, bypassing Naruto completely to plop itself down beside Pervy Sage and stick its whole nose in his neck. Pervy Sage groaned. The scarred wolf laughed.

“Jiraiya,” it greeted before pouncing on top of him.

“Ow!” Pervy Sage howled. “Kashikiri, get off me!” 

“Kashikiri,” the mother wolf snapped. 

“Sorry, Mother, sorry.” The scarred wolf crawled off Jiraiya and trotted to Naruto instead, shoving his nose against Naruto's side.

“Hey!” Naruto jumped at the cold wetness that brushed against him. It was uncomfortable and sudden, much colder and harder than Pakkun or Shiba used to sniff him.

“Kakashi,” Kashikiri breathed before nuzzling against Naruto's side and wrapping around him. “He smells like our pup, Mother.” 

The mother wolf stared down at him, her blue eyes sharp and demanding. “You know Kakashi?”

Naruto nodded frantically. “Yeah, Kashi's my dad. I came so you could help me save him.” 

“Pup's in trouble?” Kashikiri asked, pausing in his attempts to merge his scent with Naruto's. Or maybe steal Kashi's scent away.

A hush fell over the wolves and even the mother wolf's snarl seemed to fade into something less angry and more anxious. From the back, another wolf emerged, from the ledge behind the mother wolf to stare at Naruto. This one was silver too, the bright silver that matched Kashi's hair and glowed under the moon the way Kashi did too. Its eyes were sharp and steely, its front leg raised to take another half step toward him. It looked desperate, afraid even as it searched his face as though looking for a lie.

Naruto nodded. “Yeah. And I gotta save him.” 

The hush faded as the wolves began to demand questions, their voices, yips, and growls all piling on top of each other. 

“Silence!” the mother wolf ordered. “Speak, Naruto Uzumaki. Tell us of our pup.” 

”There's these guys called the Akatsuki. They were after me.” Naruto's hand moved toward his stomach, fingers clenching over the spot that once held his seal. “But Kashi... He's alive and they have him. But I'm not strong enough to save him. Pervy Sa- Jiraiya said I'd need to learn all about Nature Charka. That it'd be able to help me save him. And the toads wouldn't teach me, so you gotta.” 

Silence.

The wolf in front of Naruto - with the steely eyes and fur made of soft moonlight - looked back to the mother wolf. A whine started low in his chest. Naruto didn't like the sound. It was too nervous. 

Nervous wasn't good.

Naruto didn't need nervous, he needed certainty.

He needed to know they were going to help him save Kashi.

The mother wolf stared back down at him with her sharp eyes. ”You think you deserve to know the secrets of the Wolf Sage, little fox?”

The name was sneered at him with danger, almost disdain 

Naruto blinked and shook his head. “What? No. I-I just wanna save my dad. Everyone said you could help!” 

Another whine from the silver wolf. 

The mother stared down at him in silence. 

Naruto's chest clenched. “Please.” The word spilled out. “Please, I just wanna save my dad. I'll do anything. Please.”

She hummed, disinterest somewhere in her voice. ”You want the power of the Wolf Sage? Prove to me you deserve it.”

“Prove?” Naruto breathed. 

“Make it back to me alive, little fox.” The mother's lips curled upward. “And perhaps I'll allow you the honor of the Wolf Sage.” 

“A-alive?” 

The whining in front of him stopped and the silver wolf turned, snapping his jaws at Naruto. 

“Alive,” the mother wolf replied. “Let the hunt begin.”