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Wonderland

Summary:

A transwoman escapes an abusive relationship only to spiral into a nihilistic depression and yearn for her lost innocence. An introverted affini questions if her terrifying appearance and sadistic urges render her unfit to ever own a floret of her own. When the two finally meet, will Alice make a decision she can't take back?

A dark romance set in the Human Domestication Guide universe.

Notes:

Written in dedication to my Owner~

This is a work of fiction! It is not intended to be a realistic or healthy example of how to be in a relationship or how to cope with and recover from traumatic experiences. Please mind the tags and read at your own pace.

If you enjoy it, please let me know! Praise keeps my little bunny butt motivated~

Chapter 1: Life Is Hard, Isn't It?

Chapter Text

Alice stared out the window. An infinite carpet of inky darkness, interrupted by tiny dots of light, like pinholes in a black sheet. She wondered, idly, if she were to reach out and press her finger into one of those holes, would she feel the warmth of a better world on the other side? As if, perhaps, space itself were some kind of terrible box, designed to entomb and torture those unlucky enough to be born within its uncaring confines. These were not serious, literal thoughts, but the idle imaginings of a woman whose grasp on reality was slipping.

Hollow. She felt hollow. Empty. Her skin was numb to the touch. Around Alice, there were lights and sounds, but she did not register them. Even the words of a person standing right next to her were practically inaudible, as though she were underwater.

She ignored them.

Alice stared at her own reflection in the murky glass. There were black bags under her eyes. The cheap bleach job had already grown halfway out of her long, tangled black hair. Her skin was pale, yet also heavily pockmarked throughout. Beneath, a burn scar decorated her neck. Her left ear was missing a small slice.

She would never be beautiful. Alice couldn’t even feel sad about it. She was just so tired.

Her right side throbbed. Slowly, lazily, she glanced down at it, almost forgetting why. Beneath her sweaty, stained sports bra, Alice’s bare skin bore a large, purple bruise. Another one stung on her cheek. Feeling was returning to her and she didn’t like it. She wanted to stay numb forever. Alas, reality was merciless. It began to claw its way back into her brain, inch by inch.

Shouting. People were shouting.

Alice continued to sit and stare out into space. Where were they? She’d never bothered to actually figure that out for certain. Somewhere far from Terra. Very, very far. Alice barely remembered it. She was a child when she left and she never saw it again. Since then, she’d lived many places, though never long enough to truly put down roots. Not until now, she supposed.

This mining colony had felt like home. Like family. At least, until… Alice refused to think about it. Not now. Rather, she could not think about it. Instead, she focused on what she could. Work. Friends. Were they friends, or only coworkers? If Alice ever quit, would any of them ever want to see her again? Perhaps at first, there would be a half-hearted effort to stay connected, only for them to slowly fade into strangers. Despite living with some of these miners for over a decade, Alice didn’t know their true character.

Over a decade… Fuck. Had it really been that long? Alice’s face paled at the thought. She wasn’t a young woman any more. Was she thirty three? Thirty four? Alice supposed it was probably something like that, but the truth was, she didn’t even know any more. It isn’t as though they had the means, nor the time, to celebrate birthdays out here. Not without missing a quota.

Where did my life go? She thought to herself.

To be fair, Alice knew she wasn’t old, per say. In fact, since getting on hormone replacement therapy, she had looked and felt younger by the day. Alice wished she’d done it ages ago. She wished she’d known it was even an option. But that train of thought wasn’t helping right now, so she discarded it.

“Alice.”

Her hearing was beginning to come back. Someone was trying to talk to her. She didn’t want to talk. She didn’t want anything to do with this.

“Alice, I… I get it, okay? What he did to you was terrible... But... A company rep is here to speak with you and-”

It was Keyla. A bit round around the middle, with a kindly expression, though Alice was never really so sure whose side Keyla was on. She seemed to flip flop between the emotional availability of an earnest friend, and her own special brand of passive aggressive self-interest, depending on the day. Even now, Alice couldn’t shake the feeling that Keyla’s maternal tone was a play at gaining some kind of social currency from this incident.

Alice couldn’t be picky right now. Though, she couldn’t really bring herself to speak at all.

“Hey. Alice.”

A male voice, just as soft. Everyone was being so soft with her right now. Handling her like she was fine china. A hand was on her shoulder. She didn’t want that right now. She didn’t like it. But she didn’t say anything.

It was Eddie, Keyla’s husband. Alice had attended their wedding in the mines, down on level K-3 where there wasn’t as much noise from the machines and where the mineral deposits glimmered a soft silver. The two of them could afford such an occasion on account of Eddie’s standing. His family managed the mine, though its owners were living in luxury far, far away. Eddie was the foreman, a position he truly believed he had earned through merit and hard work, but everyone knew better.

“You sit tight, okay? We’ll take care of what we can,” he said. Eddie was a kind man, though a bit meek. When it was up to him, anyway. He had led a relatively easy life and wasn't good with conflict. Eddie couldn’t stand his ground very well when Keyla decided she wanted her way, and she’d come between him and acts of generosity before. In this case, however, they both seemed to be in agreement.

“We’ll help you,” Keyla said, hugging Alice from behind. Again, something Alice did not ask for and did not appreciate. People just touched her. Why did people just touch her?

“... Thanks,” Alice managed to croak out, barely audible. Her voice was a pitch too low and she hated the way it sounded, even on a good day. And this was not a good day.

After that, they gave her more reassurances. Alice would have liked to say that it didn’t mean anything to her, but it did. She was too vulnerable, too raw, to keep herself closed off. Their words, while canned expressions of sympathy, really did make a small difference.

And then she was alone.

The metal door to her room was shut flush to its frame, though not yet sealed. It could only be sealed from the inside by rotating a thick, iron ring. Alice stared across the room at it. Her eyelids sagged heavily and her eyes were glassy. She dragged herself up off of the metal bench and over to the wheel, grasping it with shaky hands, then put her full weight into turning it one rotation.

Privacy.

Alice flopped onto the sleeping cot. At least she had her own room. Eddie had seen to that, after… Alice refused to think about what happened. Her ribs hurt. She laid down across the stiff fabric and flipped open a chunky metal laptop. The thing was heavy, ugly, and tethered to the walls with huge, awkward cables. It booted up loudly and clumsily. Pale, green letters decorated a black screen. 𝗪𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸, 𝗔𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲𝘄𝗼𝗼𝗱. This awful device was her lifeline. Her purpose.

As she was no good in the mines, Alice’s role on the station was to handle communications. She and another dozen poor fools who all thought, like she did, that it would be relatively easy money. Her reward was hellish hours for barely any pay and the constant looming threat of ‘Don’t like it? Grab a drill and get down there, then.’

Today, though... Today she’d been given a week off. One week off. Unpaid. Even the Terran Accord was a little considerate when it came to cases like hers. Rather, they’d likely run the numbers and found that providing abuse victims a few days to get their shit together resulted in marginally less employee suicides, which made it good for business. Any longer than that was out of the question.

With nothing to do, Alice just skimmed the internet idly. A hyperspace drone had updated their station’s network last week, so it was decently fresh. Doomscrolling might not have been the best use of her limited free time, but it wasn’t as though there was anything else to do in her tiny broom closet of a bedroom.

Another colony gone. Another warship gone. Nobody knew exactly where the battle lines were, but there was a creeping shadow of missing humans slowly spreading out from the edge of Terran space. From what Alice gathered, an alien species called the affini were making steady, uninterrupted progress in their invasion. She wondered what happened to those people? Were they dead? Slaves? Alice hadn’t even seen the affini propaganda, all the way out here. She knew next to nothing about them aside from the rate at which they’d expanded and the Terran Accord’s response to their aggression. There was a war happening, somewhere. A war they were losing.

Alice couldn’t even bring herself to feel fear, right now.

With a sigh, she opened another window. The Terran overnet. To be specific, she’d connected to a much larger computer deep inside the station which was capable of such a thing. She required access to it in order to transmit data to their corporate headquarters. The connection was so slow that Alice could only send a few characters at a time. It was an excruciating, but necessary, process. She kept the feed open, in case they happened to reply, since receiving a response could also only be done by bits and pieces. That way, when Alice checked it, complete messages would be waiting for her.

Today, there was no such correspondence. At least, not from the company.

“... What?” Alice actually said out loud when she saw it. A message. It wasn’t addressed to anyone. Who would just broadcast a message across the Terran overnet without even setting an intended recipient? That would be an obscene waste of time and resources. It intrigued her. Against her better judgment, Alice couldn’t help herself. She opened it.

Life⠀ ‎ is⠀ ‎ hard,⠀ ‎ isn't⠀ ‎ it?

Alice just blinked in the dim light of the monitor. Who would send this and why? What was the point? Maybe… Could it be somebody like herself? Another servant to the merciless comms, miserable and despondent, just casting their thoughts out into the void? They could get fired for that.

She could get fired for responding.

… Alice started typing.

She couldn’t send much. She didn’t have that kind of time. Alice hoped she could get three letters through at once. It was pushing things, but maybe if she compressed it enough.

Yep

Well. That was pointless. Alice supposed she was also just screaming into the void, too. She sat up, wincing a bit and clutching her side, then stood slowly and made her way back to the bench by the window. She could almost see the edge of the ring. Mariposa Mining Station 821-019 was set in the side of an asteroid; it was one of many which formed a great ring around the gas giant Edapus. Sometimes, if she were lucky, she could see it clearly.

Tonight, she wasn’t lucky.

All that awaited Alice outside her small, round porthole was the unforgiving emptiness of space. How many light-years away were those stars? Could one of them be Sol? She didn’t actually know. Maybe. If she sent a message home, how long would it take to arrive? Would anyone she knew be alive to receive it?

Of course, this was nothing more than idle daydreaming. To make such personal use of company property would be severely punished. She really shouldn’t have even sent that one word out, just moments ago. If anyone noticed, she could lose her job, which meant losing everything. Food, shelter, the clothes on her back. She couldn’t afford to get off this rock. Alice would die here without work.

She turned back to her laptop in a flash of paranoia, intending to obfuscate her frivolous message in some way so that it would be more difficult to discover who was responsible. However, when her gaze fell onto that dim screen, sitting open on her bed just a few feet away, she froze.

Alice’s eyes were wide as saucers, her mouth hanging slightly open. She felt a trembling in her limbs and a cold chill running down her spine. Her throat seized and her skin tingled.

There was a reply.

That’s impossible, she thought. That is completely impossible. No Terran technology can do that. From the looks of it, the reply wasn’t all that short either. Much longer than hers. Transmitting something like that across the overnet should have taken hours, maybe even days, let alone receiving hers so quickly! Humanity can’t do this. We’re decades away from it, at least, Alice told herself. She was certain. She had to be hallucinating. Imagining things. Maybe… Maybe everything that had happened to her had… Broken something in her brain. Something important. Yet, as Alice approached, the hallucination did not disappear.

This can’t be real.

Even so, there it was. Not just any message, either, but a reply sent directly to her, and only her.

Maybe⠀ ‎ it⠀ ‎ doesn't⠀ ‎ have⠀ ‎ to⠀ ‎ be.

Chapter 2: Deadly Nightshade

Chapter Text

A hulking shape of tangled, black vines and sharp thorns skulked in the dark, blood red eyes transfixed on the bioluminescence of the plant-tech facsimile of a monitor. Around her, empty glass vials and jars shimmered in the pale light, their contents long consumed. The chamber was small and cramped, but it befit her needs. No distractions. No interruptions.

Atropa Belladonna did not like to be bothered.

And the many days she had spent cooped up in here were finally bearing fruit. Though the past seven hundred and fourteen attempts had been a failure, Atropa was certain that this time, this time she had done it. Now, for the test.

Life⠀ is⠀ hard,⠀ isn't⠀ it?

A simple message. Something just to see if it works at all. If she’d finally developed the means to communicate with humanity’s pathetic excuse of an overnet with superior affini hardware. The difficulty here was not on their end, it was with the limitations of the recipient. Atropa could hardly believe that humans even called what they had ‘technology.’ It was closer to banging sticks and rocks together than anything she would ever use such a term to describe.

Come on, sticks and rocks. Receive this message.

Of course, she wouldn’t know unless someone replied. Maybe it had been working all along and the humans were just too wise to fall for such obvious bait? No. Not all of them. Atropa couldn’t entertain the notion that every single human with access to their overnet would all, collectively, have the sense to ignore any mysterious transmission. At least one of them would be stupid enough. Surely, most of them were stupid enough. Dumb, cute little things.

Stop it, Atropa told herself. Stop degrading them. They’re beloved sophonts - sentient beings! They deserve our grace and protection and… Alas, she could not police her own thoughts. They came whether Atropa liked it or not. Her superiority. How small, and incompetent, and adorable humans were. The way that they screamed at the sight of an affini, the way they cowered, begged for mercy. Her vines trembled. The delicious expressions they made when all hope was lost. The sound of their moans and cries. The crying! Oh, the crying. What a marvelous feat of evolution. To think that a species would actually leak saline and make such beautiful music when they were sad or in pain or…

Atropa took a deep breath to calm herself down. She’d gotten excited again.

This is why no human should ever be your floret, she reminded herself. Not ever.

A grim silence fell over Atropa in the wake of her rampant fantasies. The excitement had faded into a dull, aching guilt. Why am I like this? Affini were supposed to be the caretakers of the universe. She was supposed to feel compassion and love for all sophonts. And… She did! She did love them. But her love was so warped, it was so… Wrong. She was wrong. Even reblooming hadn’t helped. If anything, the thoughts were louder now! Why… Why why why why-

Yep

A reply. There was a reply!

Atropa couldn’t even bother to hate herself right now. Instead, she was overtaken by righteous achievement. Victory! She’d done it!

“Yes!” Atropa actually shouted with a predatory tone, her thorns oozing something toxic, before getting ahold of herself. Embarrassed, despite being alone, she smoothed over her vines with a hand and then slumped over her desk again like some kind of overgrown black kudzu.

Okay. It works. It works and a human replied.

She didn’t have time to think. She needed to keep this correspondence going. They probably didn’t expect anyone to receive their little message for days, but Atropa’s custom array had captured it near instantly. She could even pinpoint its location, though that was less pressing than the immediate concern of keeping this creature engaged.

Maybe⠀ it⠀ doesn't⠀ have⠀ to⠀ be.

That should do it, Atropa thought to herself. After all, the human had agreed that life under the Terran Accord was difficult, even undesirable. She didn’t want to come on too strong, so she simply posited the possibility that there might be something better out there. She was hoping this would entice them enough to reply again. The more correspondence the better. Atropa needed all the data she could get out of this.

Naturally, if her discovery led to the rescue of these poor humans on the other end of the line, they would not go to her. Other affini, affini without these terrible impulses, would take them in. Atropa was fine with that. She’d made her peace with it a long time ago. Part of her motivation to develop this new technology was a sort of recompense for her internal failings.

She would never have a floret of her own and she was fine with it.

She was fine with it.

She was fine with it.

Atropa realized her grip on the desk had begun to dent the metal and buckle its legs. She quickly released it, sulking back against the wall behind her and staring at the ceiling.

“Sweet little things. Such fragile, soft creatures... They shouldn’t ever have to share a room with something like me.”


Alice couldn’t move. She was frozen, like some prey animal caught in a predator’s gaze, just standing there staring at the monitor. There it was. It couldn’t be, but it was.

Maybe⠀ it⠀ doesn't⠀ have⠀ to⠀ be.

She wasn’t educated enough to understand precisely how the overnet worked or what the giant, room-spanning machine in the base of the station actually did to send and receive information across multiple solar systems. But Alice knew enough to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this speed and quantity of data was completely outside of human capabilities.

Who, or what, sent this message?

Her mind flashed to the war. The affini. She’d never paid too much attention to it. Mariposa was so remote that Alice had never seriously considered the possibility of the war directly affecting her life. Like many, she was too focused on her own problems to think of the bigger picture. One never expects such things to matter until they do.

Could this be the affini?

She wracked her brain for everything that she knew about them. They were an alien race, or species, she supposed. Plant-like, allegedly, and very large. Advanced. So advanced that they’d gained ground every single time Mariposa’s internet was updated with news of the front.

Is it possible that they could be capable of this?

Alice placed a hand on her sweaty forehead, smiling deliriously, eyes a bit wild. If they’re able to send a message like that, instantly, across this much distance… Then humanity doesn’t stand a chance. That puts them decades, maybe centuries ahead of us, she thought to herself.

She just started to laugh.

There was no humor in Alice’s laughter. It was a hollow, empty sort of sound, something cold and broken. If the affini are going to win no matter what, then none of it mattered. All those hours she’d worked. The days. The weeks. The years. Everything she’d been through. Everything that had happened to her. Humanity was all dead, anyway. Walking corpses.

Even him.

Her grin became manic. That’s right. He’s doomed too. That bastard.

Alice slumped against the wall and leaned her head back, shutting her eyes and just laughing. She wasn’t happy. It was a release of emotion. She needed to get all this pent up feeling out, somehow. As the minutes passed, her laughter dissolved into sobbing. She slid down the wall into a fetal position, hugging her knees to her chest and crying violently. She wailed and trembled, snot and tears running down her face and knees.

Some of her coworkers could hear it. None of them wanted the trouble. They left her mercifully alone.

Alice had no idea how long she cried. There was so much pain inside of her and it all came rushing out. Before she knew it, she was laying on the floor. The cold metal stuck to her cheek. It felt nice against the bruise. Her ribs were hurting again.

“So that’s it, huh?” Alice asked nobody.

And then, something clicked. Inside Alice’s brain, a piece slid into place. Things felt different now. If humanity was doomed, then that was that. There was nothing she could do about it. So why bother? Why bother with anything? None of it mattered. Nothing mattered.

Alice struggled to sit up. She felt so sore. Her face and neck were disgusting. She grabbed an oily rag off the banister and wiped herself down, then sat softly on the hard, uncomfortable bed.

Alice glanced idly at the screen.

The message was still there.

She sighed. Wow. Lucky me. The inevitable doom of my entire species wants to chat. You know what? Sure. Why not? After all, what did she have to lose? Her job? Alice chuckled darkly. Not like that was going to matter for too much longer. Whether she starved on this rock or got ripped apart by aliens, what difference did it really make any more?

Alice put her fingers over the keyboard, but she hesitated. After a beat, she swapped to the previous window. In the claustrophobic darkness of her tiny quarters, Alice opened the internet database, then typed in a search term.

𝗔𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶

Dozens of documents opened. Audio files. Video files. It was all new to her. She felt oddly fixated on the topic, now, even though it had never interested her before. Fixation was good, Alice reasoned. Anything to keep her mind focused and away from… Alice refused to follow that line of thought any further.

𝗗𝗶𝘀𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗱𝗴𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗦𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗲

𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗦𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗔𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗻 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗸𝗲𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗰𝘁

𝗔𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗖𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗺 𝘁𝗼 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗣𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗲

𝗔𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗗𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗮𝗹

𝗧𝗲𝗿𝗿𝗮𝗻 𝗔𝗰𝗰𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗔𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗲

𝗡𝗲𝗴𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗕𝗿𝗼𝗸𝗲𝗻 𝗗𝗼𝘄𝗻

𝗔𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗗𝗲𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗪𝗮𝗿

Article after article. Alice opened each one, briefly skimming its contents. In the end, she only ended up more confused. There was so much misinformation and bias in these reports. They gave her little concrete understanding of what the affini actually wanted. To enslave humans? To conquer the galaxy? Something like that, she supposed.

Alice was already a slave to begin with. Albeit, the oligarchy was clever, and they had developed a sophisticated system to ensure that their wage slaves didn’t feel like slaves. But that’s what it was. At least, she’d always thought so.

She moved the cursor back to the overnet window. Her finger hovered over the key for a beat, then she opened it. There it is. This message could not have come from anywhere else. Alice swallowed. She couldn’t help but be nervous. Despite largely giving up on life, there was an instinctual fear at play. Something ancient. Self preservation pushed at the back of her skull, becoming louder by the second.

It would be better to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth, right? She’d read all the human accounts of what affini were and what they wanted, but why stop there? She had a direct line to one. This was her chance to at least find out what kind of lie they’re selling. It might even be the truth. Alice’s curiosity was getting the better of her.

Alice typed a single letter. Her breathing was getting heavy. She was sweating.

A second letter. Her heart was pounding in her chest.

The third letter. Alice just stared at it. If she sent this, there would be no going back.

The rabbit hole was right in front of her.

Crawl back to your old life, or jump in.

She hit enter.

How


Atropa felt a shiver run through her core. Her thorns tingled with elation, causing the black mass of her viney body to undulate and ripple disconcertingly. The sophont replied. Of course, due to the limitations of humanity’s pathetic technology, they could scarcely send three characters. Not even a question mark, though Atropa had little doubt that this was a question.

She propped her chin on a spiny tendril to think for a moment. How? How could life be less hard? Or how had she sent these messages? She supposed both of those questions could be what the human meant. Should Atropa answer them? Should she answer honestly?

Poison seeped from some of her larger spikes, a bad habit when she was focused or stressed. It pooled on the floor in steaming purple puddles. Even other affini were unsettled by Atropa’s appearance and mannerisms. She was everything that the most paranoid humans had ever dreamt up in their worst nightmares, and more. Genuinely terrifying. Like some kind of eldritch mass of writhing shadows, sharp and venomous and disturbing. This is why Atropa kept to her private ship. Her peers were too tactful to admit it, but she knew they didn’t care for her.

Finally, she’d reached a conclusion.

This human was clearly not happy, she’d admitted as much in her first reply. Atropa wasn’t surprised about that, human culture was basically designed to produce suffering. In fact, if she tried, Atropa doubted she could concoct a more insidious and efficient mechanism for producing human misery than what humans called their own economic and political system. It was brilliant, if deranged. She almost had a twisted appreciation for its shameless malice.

If her new pen pal was reaching out from a place of desperation and despair, she didn’t really need to answer the human’s question. Rather, all she truly had to do was throw them a lifeline. Open the door, so to speak. And in the meantime, she could continue to run diagnostics on the communications feed for her presentation to the others.

I⠀ can⠀ help⠀ you.

That should do it. Atropa snickered to herself. She knew, logically, that her goal was to help this human. To help all humans. That this was an act of benevolence and rescue. Yet, Atropa couldn’t help but enjoy the chase, just a little. She took a sort of smug glee in the act of leading this lower lifeform along and playing with its inferior brain. Like a predator pursuing and cornering prey. Her mind briefly wandered to what this human might look like. How they were probably cowering at the realization that an affini was speaking with them. Their pale face and wide eyes and that adorable way they would shiver and shake.

A pang of guilt. Right, I shouldn’t be thinking those things.


Alice furrowed her brow. What an obvious trap. Help her? Like they helped all those colonies that went dark? Sure. It sounded to her like the kind of help she could devise for herself with a strong rope and somewhere to hang it. No thanks.

But then, what if it was earnest? She didn’t actually know what happened to the people who were taken. Domestication? Slavery, basically. That’s slavery. Well, this station is slavery too. Maybe the affini’s slavery was better? Uhg. Alice sighed and rested her forehead on a lumpy, hard pillow.

This was insane. If anyone ever found out she was sitting there, just talking to an affini on her laptop, she’d be shot in the head for treason.

She looked at it again.

I⠀ can⠀ help⠀ you.

‘We’ll help you,’ Alice heard Keyla’s voice in her head. She couldn’t help but chuckle darkly. Everyone pitied her, even the fucking alien overlords. What a day.

“Well… In for a penny, in for a pound,” Alice whispered to herself as she began to type.


Atropa was passing the time with a simple trace. It was child’s play for her to pinpoint the location of her new friend. She compared the coordinates to a starmap projected on the adjacent wall and whistled. What a remote system. This poor thing was stranded in the middle of nowhere. Edapus. No, that’s a gas giant, it can’t be. Ah, one of the asteroids in its ring. Why would they be there? Humans were so strange. Could it be to gather resources? Atropa knew that they liked to take some of the most unfortunate members of their ‘society’ and toss them into hellish places just to collect a few rocks.

With a stray vine, Atropa caressed a flower bulb, coaxing it into unfurling and projecting something new onto the opposite surface with its bioluminescence. Their archive of the Terran internet. At least, a collection of all the data they’d absorbed from the networks of every colony and ship the affini had conquered.

She idly navigated the database until Atropa found it. Mariposa Company had mining stations all over this ring, or they used to. As the ore veins ran dry, workers were either relocated or, to Atropa’s horrified disbelief, simply abandoned and left to starve. They call this insanity governance? Only one station remained in operation. Mariposa Mining Station 821-019.

“There you are, little thing,” Atropa cooed, sounding way more sinister than she meant to.

OK

Atropa blinked. She glanced at the central display. A reply. Just two letters, but they said a lot. Her new toy was willing to play. Sophont. Not a toy. Valued sentient lifeform. Come on, Atropa. Stop it.

She tried to concentrate. Atropa had all the information she needed to mount a full scale rescue of these poor souls. Rather, she had enough data to share with her peers so that they could go help these humans. Atropa didn’t really like to leave this room, let alone her hab. Her fulfillment was here, with her beloved displays. All the information and entertainment in the Affini Compact, right at her fingertips. Direct communication with anyone she might want to talk to, all from the comfort of her home. Why would she want to leave? Especially to wade through some filthy human mine.

Besides that, if she were surrounded by the adorable, screaming little things, Atropa didn’t trust herself enough not to hurt one.

With a dejected sigh, Atropa began to type a question. Her peers would want to know how many humans were on this rock so that they could accurately judge the scale of the operation. Might as well ask.

How⠀ many⠀ humans⠀ are⠀ living⠀ in⠀ Station⠀ 821-019?


Alice almost screamed. Sure, she’d more or less accepted that humanity was doomed. But still, there was a difference between that sort of detached, indirect surrender and this. The affini knew exactly where she was. She swallowed hard, trying to push down the flight response and get ahold of herself. You knew what you were doing. You knew this is where it would lead. Calm down.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

Alice’s heart rate slowed and she physically felt herself coming back down to reality. This is fine. Alice slapped her cheeks with her hands. Anything is better than this fucking place.

She opened the network and checked the employee and family roster. Then Alice sucked in a big gulp of air and held it, typing the number. This was treason. She was a traitor.

57

Alice held her breath. What had happened to her, that she would be willing to go this far? What would the others think if they ever found out? Names and faces began to run through Alice’s mind. Conversations over coffee. Laughter at dinner. Watching the latest broadcast when a hyperspace drone came through to update their network. Board game night at Eddie’s.

What had she done?

Then, that thing in her brain kicked in. The new passenger. The voice that told Alice: It doesn’t matter. Nobody matters. You don’t matter. They don’t matter. We’re all dust, anyway. She could feel the tension leaving her shoulders as merciful, kind apathy washed across her thoughts. She glanced at the window and let the vast, empty expanse of space comfort her. We’re nothing.

Alice was tired. Today had already been emotionally draining enough before all this. Her eyelids were heavy with exhaustion. She’d laughed. She’d cried. She had felt deep terror. And she’d felt hope. A glimmer of hope that maybe, if things changed, they might change for the better. Rather, there was a growing resentment and determination inside her. Things had to change. They had to.

As she laid her head on the pillow. Her body felt heavy. It would be strange, sleeping alone in an unfamiliar room. This hadn’t been her quarters until today. Last night, she’d gone to sleep in the top bunk of a room shared with… Him. Alice shut her eyes. She felt such a complicated mix of emotions. Relief to have escaped, yet also, somehow, remorse. Alice was terrified that she’d made a mistake. That now she would be alone forever. That no one would ever love her again. That he was right about her. In fact, she’d all but accepted it. Would a woman with any hope for the future have answered that message?

And yet, why drag the whole station down with her? If Alice wanted it to end, why didn’t she just put a plasma rifle in her mouth and pull the trigger? The answer, she surmised, was that she was a coward. Alice was a coward who would rather bring doom to her home, to all the people who’d loved and supported her, than take matters into her own hands.

However, that was not the real reason. She wasn’t ready to accept it, but the truth was, deep down inside, Alice wanted to be saved. She wanted something, anything, to happen. She dared to hope that maybe, just maybe, this affini creature actually would rescue her.

Stupid. Childish. How could a grown woman lay there and wish for something so immature as to be magically spirited away from her life? It was pure fantasy. Maybe she’d never really gotten a chance to grow up.

And yet, try as she might to deny it, Alice did want that. She wanted it so badly, in fact, that when the last message came through, she didn’t even feel fear. Alice observed the words from where she lay, eyelids half closed, mouth slightly agape.

See⠀ you⠀ soon.

A soft blush ran up over her cheeks and she shut her eyes with a sad smile. As if. Alice sleepily closed the overnet window, then rolled over and let darkness take her.

Chapter 3: Something Has To Change

Chapter Text

See⠀ you⠀ soon.

Of course, Atropa didn’t mean that personally. She wouldn’t be going anywhere near that rock. But she did intend to rescue this human. All 57 of them. …In her own way.

Atropa inserted her limb inside of the plant-tech machine and twisted it to the left 90 degrees. The organic computer made a soft squelching sound and then hummed as it connected to the affini overnet. Light unfolded around Atropa, enveloping her in an array of affini script inside concentric circles and connecting lines. The projection spanned the room, running up over the walls and ceiling. She extracted her arm and began to make selections.

𝒰𝓇𝑔𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓂𝑒𝑒𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔. 𝐼 𝒹𝒾𝒹 𝒾𝓉.

These words, though written in native affini, seared themselves into the luminous display before dispersing. They arrived near instantaneously on matching devices all over the quadrant of systems where Atropa was stationed, alerting a variety of her peers and superiors.

It took time for all of them to assemble. Eventually, though, Atropa would be surrounded by the life-like holograms of her own kind. Many of them seemed tired or overworked, and none were excited to be here.

“What is the meaning of this?” asked Genista. A thick, voluptuous pillar of lavender colored vines decorated by small, delicate flowers. Her tone was exasperated. She slumped over from the weight of all her tasks, many of which had been unceremoniously put on hold in order to humor Atropa’s request.

“We’re very busy, Atropa,” Nerine admitted with a voice that was at once both sympathetic and frustrated. A thin, spindly figure of bark and dry leaves, she looked even more overworked than the rest of them.

“I’ve done it,” Atropa declared with a bit less enthusiasm than she’d hoped. The atmosphere in the room was oppressive and she already felt uncomfortable. “I've cracked the Terran overnet. I was able to send and receive multiple messages. I’ve found a human settlement using this method. A mining station, to be precise. 57 sophonts are-”

“You contacted them?” Nerine asked, looking alarmed.

“Dirt and roots, Atropa. Please tell me you didn’t give away your identity to a human.” That deep, angry voice could only belong to Hellebore. A massive oaken figure built like a work of art, covered in old gashes and scars that they’d yet to rebloom and heal. A security expert and ex-feralist hunter who’d helped bring no less than three sophont species into line during their service. They'd had no such excitement during the human domestication campaign, at least not yet, but Hellebore retained the grim caution and seriousness of their responsibilities.

“Not explicitly, though I imagine they’ve put it together,” Atropa admitted, her voice getting low and quiet. “But we can just save them. I have their coordinates, we’ll just-”

“Do you have any idea how many planets, how many systems, we’re juggling at one time right now?” Hellebore asked with a cold, tempered rage. “We don’t have time to fly halfway across the galaxy to some remote location, deep inside enemy territory.”

“And now that they think affini are coming for them, the humans will erupt into chaos,” Genista said frantically, holding her face with both hands. “The sophont you contacted could be killed for turning traitor! Some of them might even self-destruct out of terror.”

“There’s a reason we take them by surprise,” Nerine said tiredly, rubbing the equivalent to temples on her head. “Atropa. Sweetheart. This isn’t good.”

Atropa’s body was undulating, irritated, like an angry pile of black licorice. Her thorns were leaking violet death. She could not hide her frustration. Not just at them, but at herself. What she’d expected to be her crowning moment of glory had turned to dirt in seconds. Worst of all, she'd put these humans at risk, and that wrenched at something deep inside her. A fundamental, instinctual component of any affini ached at the thought that her actions could have caused sophont suffering.

The other affini largely hid their disgust, but a few couldn’t help but show how they didn’t really care much for just how creepy Atropa was, especially when she got agitated. She was like a beast in the company of beautiful maidens. For every soft, smooth curve among the holograms, Atropa matched it with sharp, jagged edges. Her voice had a toxic, sinister quality to it, even when she meant well. Try as she might, she could not rearrange her face into something that wasn’t scary to look at. Her pitch black coloring gave her the unsettling appearance of a predator’s silhouette in the dark.

And she knew they pitied her for it. Their sympathy stung. She knew they thought she was some kind of mistake. That affini should never be this frightening, this monstrous. No one would ever say it. Never. It would be an unspeakable faux pas in their culture to judge anyone for how they look or sound. But Atropa could tell that they did. She could tell.

“You have to manage this,” Hellebore stated flatly.

“What do you mean, manage this?” Atropa asked tensely.

“None of us have the time. You’ve put sophont lives at risk. You will fly to that system, dock your hab, and monitor them to ensure that no human gets hurt.”

Atropa was speechless. She stared for a long moment, just processing what they'd said. Hellebore expected her to go babysit 57 humans while still fulfilling all of her other responsibilities?

“You think I have time for that?!”

“You made this bed, as the humans say,” Genista said. The rest of the affini nodded in agreement.

“What do I even do if they do go crazy and start killing each other or themselves? I’m not a field operative. I don’t even have pharmaceuticals in this hab.” Well, maybe a couple, but definitely not enough to subdue a whole colony. “I’m not trained in xenodrug administration or human physiology or-”

“Just use your natural-” Nerine started to say, but then fell silent as she remembered. As they all remembered. Atropa was poisonous. Almost anything grafted onto her would soon wilt and decay black. Her pollination was toxic to any lifeform. The problem was with her core. The affini’s best had tried and failed to fix her. Now they were all looking at her with such sadness, like she was defective. Like she needed their compassion.

“You’ll figure something out,” Hellebore said, cutting the awkward silence.

Atropa hated this feeling. The feeling of helplessness. Of being powerless. The authority of the masses, of those older and more experienced than her, came crushing down. It made her feel small. It made her feel like she didn’t get a say. There was nothing that she hated more than this. She knew they all looked down on her. She knew in her core that they didn’t see her as an equal. She was seething.

“...Atropa,” Genista tried to say with a maternal and comforting tone. It sounded so fake to Atropa. So forced. She didn’t want it, anyway. The very last thing she needed was to be coddled and condescended to.

“Very well,” Atropa replied with as little emotion as she could muster, trying not to give them the satisfaction.

She cut the feed.

Atropa sat in silent darkness for a long moment, coiling like a spring. Then, all at once, she lashed out, smashing against the walls and floor, piercing and ripping and slapping and whipping and letting out all of her pent up frustration in a flurry of violence and self-hatred. When she was finished, the chamber was leaking fluids from multiple gashes and pierced holes. Entire machines had been rendered inoperable until she repaired them. She was covered in blue and green and orange fluid from the vandalized equipment. It pooled at her roots and mixed with her venom, hissing quietly.

“It’s cool,” Atropa said shortly.


Alice sipped her coffee, holding the mug with both hands. It was terrible. The instant powder they used was way past its expiration date, but technically not too dangerous. The sweetener was even worse. She didn’t dare imagine what it was actually made out of. Definitely not sugar. Without it, the coffee was completely undrinkable. And yet, the aftertaste and tacky sensation in her mouth which that sickly sweet chemical left behind almost made her want to chug the whole thing at once.

“Alice? … Alice?”

Alice snapped out of it and realized that she had been just staring into her cup for a long time, not saying a word. She came back into reality just in time to glance up and see Keyla, sitting down to eat breakfast. Her meal didn’t look any more appetizing than the coffee.

“We… We’ve stalled as long as we can, Alice. …Eddie is with Mr. Cooper now. He’s from the company. He really needs to talk to you.”

Keyla had stalled as long as she felt like it, Alice concluded to herself. Keyla had reached her quota of benevolence and now she was done with her. Fair enough, Alice supposed. She couldn’t very well expect everyone to put her first. Or anyone to put her first. Ever.

“Alice. Alice, I’m losing you.”

Keyla tapped a finger on the table in front of Alice’s face, bringing her glassy eyes back into focus.

“... Sorry.” Alice said quietly.

“It’s fine, hon. Just… Just maybe fix your hair? Mr. Cooper will be here any moment.”

What’s wrong with my hair? Alice didn’t say it. She just stared blankly back at the woman.

The door slid open behind Keyla. There stood two men. One was a bit skinny and on the shorter side with a buzz cut that really didn’t look quite right on him, glancing anxiously at the floor. Eddie. The other was different. Tailored suit and slick back hair. Piercing eyes. Alice let out an exhausted sigh. She really didn’t want to have to deal with the company right now.

“Alice, this is Mr. Cooper,” Eddie explained, pointlessly.

“A pleasure,” Cooper said, voice devoid of anything resembling pleasure.

“Morning,” Alice replied begrudgingly with a monotone.

Keyla and Eddie retreated to the opposite end of the break room to give them some space. She spoke to Eddie quietly. Alice eyed them with suspicion. What was she saying to him? Alice couldn’t help her paranoia. They were definitely talking about her and it was so hard not to worry about it.

But who cares? Alice thought, and it actually helped to alleviate her anxiety. If she dared to believe that she hadn’t imagined her correspondence last night, then none of this mattered at all. Or it wouldn’t matter for much longer, anyway.

“Lewis-” Cooper began.

“Alice,” she corrected him.

He blinked. Cooper glanced down at his papers and flipped through them a bit. How could the company still have her deadname on file? Alice rolled her eyes. Incompetency didn’t account for this. They just didn’t give a shit about her.

“Ah, right. Apologies, Alice.” He didn’t sound sorry. “In any case, I am here to speak with you about your recent dispute with your husband-”

“Ex-husband.”

“As I understand it, you’ve just recently separated. I’m afraid that you must remain separate for one year before we can officiate a divorce, the cost of which will be deducted from-”

“Sure,” Alice interrupted him, propping her arm on the table and supporting her head with one hand. The black bags under her eyes had gotten worse and her eyelids sagged with the weight of sleep loss.

Cooper cleared his throat.

“As I was saying. You had a dispute with Gabriel Daley, is that correct?”

Alice grabbed the bottom edge of her stained tank top and lifted it up over her head. She stood slowly, placing the crumpled garment on the table and facing Cooper, stone faced. Her body was covered in bruises. Her sports bra, the same she wore yesterday, bore bloodstains.

“... I see,” he replied tersely, taking notes. “And did you happen to upset him in some way?”

Alice’s eye twitched. She sat back down hard, not bothering to put the top back on.

“Apparently,” she replied with venom.

“Well, Alice. You have my sympathies,” she doubted that, “but I’m afraid that this whole incident isn’t really in the company’s best interest. Gabriel is a hard worker. A loss in his stellar productivity would-”

“I never want to see him again,” Alice stated firmly.

Silence followed. It was tense. She couldn’t tell what Cooper was thinking.

“Perhaps marriage counseling?”

Alice chuckled darkly. She stared into her coffee mug.

“Docked from my pay too?”

“Well, you are the one who lodged an official complaint.”

She grinned. Cooper raised an eyebrow, not sure where this was coming from. Alice just leaned back in her chair and smiled at the ceiling with her eyes shut. You’re all going to get what’s coming to you, she thought smugly. None of this matters. Not your company. Not your shitty policies. Not my goddamn name being wrong on your fucking paperwork.

“... Moving on, I understand you will no longer be dwelling with your husband-” Alice winced “-in the immediate future? I’ll leave it to your supervisor to sort that out.”

She remained silent.

“There is also the matter of your login credentials on the network. I see you’ve updated them to Alice Rosewood?”

Alice stared at him expectantly until he continued.

“While I do have a record of your first name being updated with our office-”

“I would hope so,” Alice retorted. It was years ago.

Cooper ignored the remark. “Rosewood is your maiden name, yes?”

Alice didn’t reply.

“Legally speaking, you aren’t divorced until-”

“I’m not changing it.”

“I would be forced to file an official reprimand on your permanent rec-”

“I’m not changing it.”

Cooper adjusted his tie.

“Very well. Thank you. Have a nice day.”

He stood and walked across the room to Eddie. They briefly exchanged words and then the company man took his leave.

Alice just felt numb. She was laying on her hand, face squished slightly, staring out the window at the stars with a vacant expression. Eddie and Keyla approached softly, delicately, as though she were some fragile thing.

“Hey Alice,” Eddie started, timidly. “About that room you’re in.”

“You said I could use it,” Alice replied quietly.

Eddie and Keyla looked at each other.

“Yes,” Eddie replied, “But you see, something came up and-”

Alice just stopped listening. Keyla wants the room for something. That’s how it always was. She just shut her brain off and focused on the stars. The vastness of space. Somewhere out there, something spoke to her. Something more than human. Would she meet it? Whether it killed her or kept her, in that moment, Alice thought to herself: either way is fine.

Anything was better than this.

“-so that’s why. I’m really sorry. You can sleep there tonight, then we can set you up with another bunkmate. It, uh, will have to be a man. The station is 90% men, as you know,” Eddie sounded so sorry.

He probably really was. But he was also weak. Too weak to say no to Keyla. Too weak to stand up for his values. And that made his values worthless. Alice was so tired of cruel people who hid behind a guise of kindness, but she was even more exhausted of spineless cowards who claimed to help, but weren’t willing to face even the slightest conflict to do so.

I’m so sick of humans.

“Whatever,” Alice replied.

Keyla looked offended at her tone, while Eddie just seemed to become guiltier. Not guilty enough to actually do anything about it, of course.

“Are we done?” Alice asked flatly.

“Oh, um, yes I think that-” Eddie started to say, but trailed off when Alice stood and walked past him.

She dragged herself down the hallway dejectedly, hanging her head. That hollow feeling had returned in force. She couldn’t even feel the cold metal against her hand as she slid it along the wall. Voices sounded like noise and lights were blurring in her vision.

Before Alice knew it, she was back in her room. Well, the room. She collapsed onto the bed, face down, and let her legs hang off the opposite end.

“Fuck.”


Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

Alice woke up with a start and blinked deliriously. What…? She reached out in the dark and fumbled around, finding the edge of her laptop. She lifted the screen, blinding herself with its dim light. The beeping didn’t cease. Now, a blinking icon in the corner of the monitor matched its rhythm. Alice struggled to slide the cursor over onto it, clicking on what she assumed had to be a notification of some kind. It expanded as her vision cleared and focused.

𝗜𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 [ 𝗨𝗻𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗡𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 ] [ 𝗔𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗼 ]

𝗔𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁? 𝗬 / 𝗡

This felt familiar. Last night, when she’d received that message, she’d been faced with a similar choice. The kind of decision that made Alice’s heart beat faster and her skin tingle. Something between fear and excitement. An emotion she didn’t have a word for.

If it was the affini hailing her, then it was close. At least inside the system. Close enough to use the station internet for a direct call. Close enough to be on their doorstep at a moments’ notice. Alice shot a paranoid glance out the window, panic creeping up her spine. Nothing. Nothing but space. She looked back at the screen. This was real. It was a bit too real.

Her finger trembled over the keyboard. Her self preservation instincts screamed in the back of her ears, but something else spoke louder. A voice that said ‘Something has to change.’

“Something has to change,” Alice said out loud with a shaky voice, steeling her resolve.

She accepted the call.

At first, her laptop emitted only static. A low hum, like an old radio, crackling in the dead of night. Then, a voice. An androgynous voice. Deep. Low. Quiet. It had a sinister, malevolent quality to it. Dangerous. Like the voice of a predator. It was synthetic, but also organic, nothing mechanical about it. An imitation of human speech. The sound sent shivers down Alice’s back and made her hair stiffen and eyes lock wide open. It made her sense of touch more sensitive; suddenly, the texture of her clothing and the bed against her skin were distracting. It made her sweat and gasp for air. It was the kind of voice that would make anyone feel like prey. Every bit as malicious and hungry as it was playful.

“Hello, little thing.”

Chapter 4: Proper Introductions

Notes:

Early readers might have noticed that I've combined some of the smaller early chapters together. Won't happen again, I just decided I'd like to shoot for a certain minimum length.

My Owner was graciously willing to read Atropa's closing line from Chapter 3. A little bit of editing on my part and, well, here you go! Atropa's canon voice. Enjoy~

Chapter Text

Alice wasn’t breathing. When she realized that, she quickly sucked in air, gasping. How long had it been that she’d sat there, frozen solid? Her lungs burned. It was as though that voice coming out of her laptop had sucked the air and heat out of her body. There was a strange rhythm to it. A cadence that wobbled in her ear drums and made her brain feel fuzzy.

“Still with me, little one?” Atropa asked smugly, grinning a wide, crescent shaped grin of gleaming silver thorns as she lounged casually in her hab. Though she wasn’t thrilled to be here, the opportunity to tease and play with a human was a very nice bonus. Atropa couldn’t help herself. They were just so cute, especially when they were scared.

Radio silence. Atropa balanced her chin on a black tendril, glancing out the adjacent window at the ring of Edapus. Somewhere in those thousands of asteroids, a poor, helpless sophont was transfixed by her voice. Terrified, probably. It was another reason that Atropa really wasn’t cut out to be a pet owner.

While all affini were naturally hypnotic to a degree, most had a comforting presence which naturally calmed sophonts down and made them more suggestible. Something rhythmic about their circulation, movements, and intonation. Atropa’s biorhythm, however, was asynchronous and wrong. It was unpleasant and unsettling. Like the rest of her, there was something defective about it. Instead of bringing peace to sophonts, it instilled a deep and instinctual tension. It was still effective - in fact, Atropa’s voice was uniquely potent even for an affini - but the natural response to hearing her was always fight or flight.

“Deep breaths, human. You’re safe,” Atropa cooed, her tone more demeaning and mischievous than she intended.

Alice did not find this reassuring. She’d never heard something scarier in her life. It was mesmerizing. She was transfixed like a deer in headlights. She tried to speak but her throat clenched up. Pushing air through the constricted passageway, Alice only managed to produce some small, high pitched squeaks.

Atropa almost melted right then and there. That was so adorable! She couldn’t believe how cute humans were, especially this one. It took her a moment to regain her composure. This wasn’t a pleasure call, she reminded herself.

“How about we start with proper introductions,” Atropa suggested, trying to drag Alice out of her paralysis. “You may call me Atropa. For now.“ She really wanted this little cutie to call her something else, but now wasn’t the time for that. There would never be a time for that, Atropa concluded with a tinge of resignation. “I represent the Affini Compact.“ Atropa tried to remember the rest of the canned elevator pitch, but couldn't quite place it. Something about bringing all sophonts into their loving embrace? She never had to do this.

“... A… …Al.. ..l..” Alice was shaking so hard her teeth were chattering. “A… Ali… Alice!” She finally managed to force out, with great effort.

“Oh, very good girl,” Atropa purred.

Alice’s heart skipped a beat. A blush ran up over her face and she quickly covered her mouth with both hands to muffle the heavy breathing. What the fuck was that? Hearing Atropa speak those words, even over comms, had been a full body sensation for her. Alice’s skin was tingling all over. She didn’t know what to say. She wasn’t sure that she even could speak.

“Well, Alice, I’m simply checking up on you. Can you answer a few questions for me, sweet thing?”

“.. Y.. Yes..”

Atropa sighed. The effect she had on humans was a bit inconvenient for this. The girl could barely talk. She would get used to it eventually, Atropa thought. She hoped so, anyway.

“Very good. Now. You will tell me whether or not the other humans have discovered our correspondence.”

“T-The.. They ha… haven’t…”

Atropa smiled that silver, cheshire grin of hers, where instead of teeth, rows of razor sharp thorns sparkled like white diamonds in the pitch black abyss of her body. Alice was adapting quickly. That was two whole words! Not to mention just how obedient the girl was. Atropa had to restrain herself from getting too attached. This little thing was making her yearn for a floret of her own; thoughts that she’d long since buried. She clenched her vines and then relaxed. Focus on the task at hand.

“Now, you will describe the state of your physical and mental wellbeing.” Atropa stated each command as though it were a simple fact that Alice would comply. She opened her digital notes and prepared to transcribe the human’s answer in affini text.

“I… I’m.. uh…”

You can do it, Atropa thought, daring not speak again and subject Alice to another dose of her voice.

“I’m.. I’m s.. Safe.. I guess…”

Atropa furrowed her equivalent to a brow. That wasn’t especially convincing.

“B.. But.. I.. I…”

Alice couldn’t believe she was answering this question. She couldn’t understand why, but she felt compelled to respond honestly and fully, despite the way her throat seized and her body trembled. Somewhere deep in her brain, she understood that that voice belonged to something that was superior to her in every way. That she was like an insect in the palm of this being’s hand. Though she’d yet to even see Atropa, something about the way she spoke, the tone, the rhythm, the intonation… Alice could not decipher what was being done to her, but something was being done. This felt compulsive. Induced. She didn’t feel as though there were any choice but to reply. If she didn’t, Alice had the overwhelming sensation that refusing would be lethal. She had no reason to think so, but she felt it.

Of course, it was just a feeling. It wasn’t as though Atropa’s biorhythmic speech could actually physically harm Alice. But the feeling of danger was very real.

“I’m… S.. Sad? I.. I think?”

Atropa nodded, still remaining silent while Alice recovered. She was regaining her speech, which was necessary for there to be any point in this. The last thing Atropa wanted to do was sabotage that for her.

“... No… Not sad. …Empty. Hollow? …I just don’t know what to do any more. I guess, I never planned this far ahead. …I didn’t expect to still be alive, I suppose. I’m… I’m tired, I think. Tired all the time. I don’t feel like anyone really cares about me. I hate my job. I hate my voice. My body… Everything is wrong. They all wish I was still Lewis. I know they do, I can see it in their eyes. They want me to be someone I’m not. …I hate it here. I hate it. I don’t want to be here any more.”

Alice had never said these things to anyone. Not once in her life. She was pouring her heart out to this creature, this monster from beyond the stars. Atropa’s hypnotic voice had dragged the ugly truth out of Alice like unclogging a drain. And once Alice started, she couldn’t stop.

“My body hurts… I’m covered in bruises… I can still feel it. I can feel him hurting me. And I hate that. I hate being reminded of him… I hate it so much. I just want people to stop talking about that bastard… We used to have something. I thought we did. But maybe, I was just desperate to be in love? I don’t think I ever really paid attention to the signs.”

Alice was crying and shaking, clutching herself so tightly that her arms stung. Atropa almost interjected but managed to stop herself at the last second. She needed to let Alice speak, even though the flood of information was almost too much to follow.

“I ignored every red flag because I just wanted to belong to someone. Does that make this my fault? Are the last six years I wasted managing that gaslighting, guilt tripping piece of shit’s emotions and taking his outbursts all because of my own stupidity? Did I deserve it? ..Did.. Did I…”

Alice couldn’t talk any more, though this time for her own reasons. She was sobbing so uncontrollably that her words had been drowned out completely. Alice was hunched over, shaking violently, tears soaking her chest and thighs. Heaving and gasping. Wailing.

Atropa stiffened at the sound. She wished that she didn’t like it as much as she did. By the Everbloom! Humans made such incredible noises when they were in anguish. She could listen to this all day. It excited her in ways she didn’t want to acknowledge. And for a long moment, perhaps a bit too long, Atropa simply listened to Alice cry and enjoyed the music of it.

These were disturbing revelations, though. Atropa reviewed her notes to the beautiful sound of Alice’s lamentations. This sophont was in critical danger of self destruction. It seemed that she had been badly abused and, worst of all, blamed herself for letting it happen. Atropa groaned. This entire situation was way more complicated than she’d anticipated nor wanted to deal with. She had been hoping, dearly, that Alice would have simply confirmed that she was physically well and of sound mind. Not… All of this.

Atropa's place, first and foremost, was with machines, not sophonts. A recreational interest in xenopsychology aside, Atropa hadn’t been trained in the handling and care of humans. She wasn’t overly familiar with their physical or emotional needs. And she definitely was not prepared for this situation.

For a moment, Atropa considered offering to rip the offending man’s head off. This kind of intrusive thought was the sort that she hated the most. Immediately, Atropa felt a wave of deep guilt and self-loathing for even allowing that into her mind. The primary motivating directive of all affini was to preserve sophont life, by any means necessary. All of her peers felt this way with burning conviction. The fact that Atropa even had this compulsion for an instant, no matter how subconscious or involuntary, was a defect. She was defective.

Meanwhile, Alice had cried herself hoarse and was now sitting in an awkward and uncomfortable silence. She’d just dumped her trauma on a super advanced, potentially evil space alien. Admittedly, Atropa had all but forced her to, though Alice didn’t know anything about affini or how they functioned, so she felt responsible for venting. Cold sorrow was slowly being replaced by red hot embarrassment. Alice buried her face in the pillow, humiliated. This was their first contact?

“Do you really want to leave that place?” Atropa’s sinister, spellbinding voice finally asked, sending fresh shivers down Alice’s spine.

She had to think about that. What it really meant. If she said yes, was she signing up for slavery or execution? She still wasn’t completely certain what the affini’s intentions were. Especially this affini. Atropa sounded, well, terrifying. Alice had never heard a more evil sound than the tone of this plant’s voice. Poisonous. That’s how she sounded.

Then again, what else was there for her, here? Alice turned her head to the side so that she could stare out the window. The ring was visible. Finally, their asteroid had rotated just enough that Alice could see it. Lines of dazzling blue and orange and silver, sparkling like an endless road of gemstones, stretching off into the distance where it vanished around the side of Edapus’s pale violet body. The view was breathtaking. Space was so vast and so beautiful, and Alice was so, so small. This station. These people. All of humanity was just a tiny grain of sand in the cruel, uncaring scale of the universe.

In that moment, apathy overtook fear. Alice stared blankly, glassy eyed, at the floor as she spoke in a quiet monotone.

“Yeah.”

Atropa muted the feed so that she could audibly sigh. This human was practically begging to be a floret, but her vines were tied! The poor thing needed to be saved and taken care of so badly, that much was plainly obvious. Yet, Atropa could not be the one to do it. Even if she was able to accept herself as an owner - which she very much could not - that didn’t change the facts. Atropa didn’t know the first thing about floret ownership, and more importantly, she lacked the authorization to even begin such a legal process. Getting said approval would be next to impossible, with how her peers looked at her. Atropa was a dangerous mistake. She didn’t deserve a pet and she shouldn’t have one, for the human’s sake. That’s what she told herself.

“I’ll be in touch,” Atropa responded.

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗧𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱.

Alice trembled in the dark. This was too real. It was far too real.

“Atropa,” Alice said quietly to herself.

This creature. This alien. This… Person? The affini was sentient. Thinking. Feeling. Alice questioned if Atropa was really a monster. She was terrifying, sure. Profoundly terrifying. But there was something else to her. Had that affini sounded… Sad? Alice must have imagined it, but she couldn’t seem to shake the notion. Atropa’s last words sounded somehow so lonely. That couldn’t be, right? It was stupid to think that. Surely she misheard. In fact, trying to read into an alien’s tone was probably a fool’s errand to begin with. Alice had no way to know if what she’d detected even matched up with human emotions. Alice was overthinking things, she concluded.

Trying to psychoanalyze some eldritch thing from across the stars. Stupid, Alice berated herself. She had no idea what she’d gotten into. How could she even begin to try and understand something like Atropa? She had jumped right into the palm of some entity from another galaxy whose motivations and means of achieving them remained a messy tangle of misinformation and assumptions. And she’d taken the entire station with her. Every single human on this rock would be dragged into this game Alice was playing with a board and pieces that were both beyond her comprehension.

Alice smiled darkly against her pillow, fear and excitement equally at play in her conflicted expression. Serves them right.

Chapter 5: Must Be Lonely

Chapter Text

Sunlight streamed in through the window, illuminating the dust hanging in the air. Alice held a small, black drawstring bag, already sagging from the weight of her heavy laptop and its thick cables, coiled and packed. Her expression was vacant. She hadn’t had this room for all that long, but it had been a safe haven. A shelter from her life. It hurt a little to leave it so soon.

As she looked around at the bare steel walls, riveted supports, and single cot, Alice couldn’t help but associate the space with her new affini contact. Atropa. The name floated in her brain. She could hear that voice in the back of her head. Even a day later, it still made the hairs on the back of her neck prick up. She imagined their conversation. Her words. Very good girl. Alice shivered all over. Maybe a change of scenery wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

She took her pillow under one arm, slung the bag over her shoulder, and then knelt down. Alice lifted the cot enough to reach underneath it, dragging out an old, dusty book. Its once vibrant pink cover was now worn and tarnished by age. The once golden lettering had lost its shine, but the words on the front were still barely legible.

ᴀʟɪᴄᴇ'ꜱ ᴀᴅᴠᴇɴᴛᴜʀᴇꜱ ɪɴ ᴡᴏɴᴅᴇʀʟᴀɴᴅ

ʙʏ ʟᴇᴡɪꜱ ᴄᴀʀʀᴏʟʟ

The book was a gift from her dad, back when her name was Lewis. It must have been his favorite. After all, he named his child after the author. So when Alice couldn’t live as Lewis any longer, she’d chosen to honor his memory. Dad loved this book. And yet, Alice had never even read it. She’d skimmed it, sure, but it was more of a memento to her. And besides, she just never had the time.

Now she had time. Maybe I should read it, Alice thought with a soft smile.

She flipped it open, carefully, to observe a message written in pen on the title page. ‘Never stop trying,’ signed by her dad. That was his motto. She tried to live by it, and in a way, she owed her life to those three simple words. No matter how dark things got, Alice refused to give up. If things aren’t working out, just try something else. She could almost hear her dad’s voice. Just try something else. Alice glanced out the window. Out at the blackness of space. Was Atropa out there somewhere, watching?

“I’m trying something else, Dad.”

“What?” Alice almost jumped out of her skin at the voice. She turned, face pale, fists clenched, eyes wide. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” the young woman behind her said, looking awkward and shy now. She was a bit shorter than Alice and wore an ill-fitting mining uniform which only emphasized how scrawny she was.

“Lora,” Alice said, her voice still shaky. Her heart rate started to slow as she calmed, realizing that this was not the monster she’d been conversing with finally here to eat her pancreas or something. “What’s up?”

“I just… Wanted to see if you needed help. Like, carrying anything.”

Lora was always so nice to everyone, especially her. Alice had helped her through a rough time, a few years ago, and while neither of them ever had enough free time to really bond, she was one of the few people in this station whose friendliness was truly genuine and selfless.

“Oh, no, I’ve got it.” Alice shut the book and slid it into her bag with a cold smile. “It’s just this.”

Lora nodded, looking a bit awkward that she’d come by for nothing.

“Walk with me?” Alice asked, mostly to cheer her up.

“Oh, sure!”

The walk to her new room was pretty quiet. Alice kept staring darkly at the walls, her mind lost in the possibilities of what she might have set into motion. Lora was a bit too timid to start a conversation, though eventually she mustered up the courage.

“Enjoying the time off?” She asked, innocently.

“... I guess, yeah,” Alice replied. It was hard for her to see it as a good thing, considering what she had to go through to ‘earn’ a reprieve.

“Do anything fun?”

Very good girl, Atropa’s voice said in Alice’s head. She shivered all over her body and her shoulders tensed.

“Nope!” Alice squeaked out, “not really!”

Lora, thankfully, didn’t seem to notice that anything was off.

As they approached the door to her new shared quarters, Alice furrowed her brow. Something was off. All the doors around it were open, as well, and there was the sound of shuffling and talking. What was going on? She crossed the threshold into view of these open chambers and a sudden eruption of cheer greeted her. A dozen miners, sitting or standing all around, some holding beers. She knew every one of them by name.

“What the fuck?!” Alice exclaimed, startled half out of her shirt.

“Hell yeah, bitch!” “Yo fuck that guy.” “About time you left him.” Everyone was talking all around her. It was so loud and chaotic.

“W-wait wait wait what is this?!” Alice felt her social anxiety creeping up the back of her neck with a ripple of discomfort.

“Gabriel is a sack of shit, girl. We all knew it,” Rick said, throwing an arm around her shoulders. While she appreciated the sentiment, she hadn’t consented to being touched. Then again, the culture down here really didn’t respect that. Alice grinned and bore it. She knew Rick meant well. A portly guy with a scruffy beard, he was a hard worker and a supportive friend.

“This is your housewarming party!” Murphy announced.

“Until our break ends,” George clarified despondently.

Alice was a bit overwhelmed. She didn’t do so well with sudden, unexpected social situations. But the thought was really touching. She had given up hope that anyone on this rock cared about her at all.

“We can take another fifteen minutes,” said a voice behind her. She turned to see Eddie coming down the hall with another case of drinks. Keyla accompanied him, and pretty soon she was holding Alice’s hands tightly with her own.

“We wanted to do something for you,” she explained softly.

Alice accepted a beer begrudgingly and sat down on a metal stool. She couldn’t help but crack a smile. This was so ridiculous and unexpected, it was actually cheering her up.

“Seriously? What about the quota?” Alice asked.

“It’s fine,” Eddie replied warmly. “We’ll fudge it a bit.”

“He means we’ll have to work overtime!” Rick said and they all laughed.

Alice laughed too, a sort of reluctant half-laugh that slowly became real.

“Wow. You guys… I.. I’m not sure what to say,” Alice almost whispered.

“Girl. We’ve got you.” “Yeah, it’ll get better! You got this.” “You’re a tough one.” All the rowdy miners were patting her on the back. Frank, Julian, Will, Quincy, Zack, Murphy, George, Rick…

“It was Lora’s idea,” Keyla said, and Lora blushed behind her.

Alice just stared into the middle distance, her smile losing its enthusiasm.

“Thanks, everyone. Really.”

Soon, they were all talking amongst themselves, clanging bottles and sharing stories of all the times Alice had helped them personally or made their day better. Alice just sat and stared into nowhere. Could it be, in the mental state she’d been in, that she had misjudged these people?

Her mind flashed to Atropa.

… Shit.


“You okay?” Rick asked from his cot. It was evening. As far as roommates went, Alice didn’t mind him. He was cool enough, if a bit messy. His quarters were a disaster. Dirty walls and empty bottles on the floor, trash and dust and grime everywhere. Alice was sitting on the top bunk, legs tucked up onto the bed to avoid touching the floor.

“Yeah,” Alice replied idly, staring with disinterest at the screen of her laptop. Tapping it with her finger.

“Alright, well, I’m gonna get some shut-eye,” Rick said before tucking in. “G’night.”

“Sleep tight,” Alice replied flatly, as an obligation.

Her attention was on the device. Staring. Waiting. Rick’s immediate snoring was way too loud for Alice to have any hope of sleeping, anyway. After a few minutes, she riffled through her bag and pulled out her dad’s old book. Alice opened it and began to read, just to pass the time. The laptop never left her sight.

Minutes turned into hours. As she read, something about the premise was oddly familiar. Though each individual anecdote of the heroine’s adventure seemed nonsensical and disconnected from the rest, Alice couldn’t help but resonate with the theme of facing the unknown. She’d taken a leap, herself, Alice reasoned.

`ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇ, ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ, ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ᴡᴀʏ ɪ ᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴛᴏ ɢᴏ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʜᴇʀᴇ?`

`ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅꜱ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴅᴇᴀʟ ᴏɴ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ,' ꜱᴀɪᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀᴛ.

`ɪ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴍᴜᴄʜ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ--' ꜱᴀɪᴅ ᴀʟɪᴄᴇ.

`ᴛʜᴇɴ ɪᴛ ᴅᴏᴇꜱɴ'ᴛ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏ,' ꜱᴀɪᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀᴛ.

`--ꜱᴏ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴀꜱ ɪ ɢᴇᴛ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴡʜᴇʀᴇ,' ᴀʟɪᴄᴇ ᴀᴅᴅᴇᴅ ᴀꜱ ᴀɴ ᴇxᴘʟᴀɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ.

`ᴏʜ, ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ꜱᴜʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ,' ꜱᴀɪᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀᴛ.

This cat reminded Alice of someone, for some reason. She smirked playfully at the thought, then yawned. Her eyelids were heavy. She blinked a few times before shutting them.

Beep.

Her eyes shot open.

Beep.

She was already climbing down, as fast and silent as she could. Laptop in hand, Alice darted out the door.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Alice prayed the quiet notifications didn’t disturb anyone as she scurried to the break room. Nobody could possibly be there at this hour. She slid inside the dark, vacant space and set her laptop on the table, sitting down in front of it. Then, she accepted the call.

Radio static. Silence. Tension. A bead of sweat ran down the side of Alice’s face. She swallowed.

“... Kept me waiting, cutie.”

Alice was ready for Atropa’s voice this time. Braced for it. Yet, despite all her mental preparations, it still hit her like a freight train. It knocked the air out of her lungs and made her heart rate spike. Adrenaline flooded her brain.

“.. I… H-Had to get somewhere.. Private,” Alice struggled to explain, gripping the table and her chest. She took a long, deep breath in, held it briefly, and then let it out. Repeating that process seemed to help. Somewhat.

“What a quick answer! You’re getting used to me,” Atropa purred with pleasure. “I’m so proud of you, little thing.”

Fuck. Atropa was talking a lot and that was not helping Alice get ahold of herself.

“You’re even more adorable than I’d imagined. What pretty long hair,” Atropa said with glee.

Alice’s heart stopped for a second. She shot a glance out the adjacent floor-to-ceiling window, tempered glass that ran the length of the break room, interrupted by titanium supports. Alice stared, unblinking, into the void of space. Could Atropa fucking see her?!

“Oh~ what a cute expression,” Atropa cooed. Holy fuck she could see her!

“W.. Where.. Where are you?!” Alice gasped.

“In my hab, sweetheart.” After a beat, Atropa clarified, “My ship.”

“.. I.. I can’t.. See it.”

“Oh, darling. It’s camouflaged,” Atropa explained slowly, as though Alice were stupid. “I wouldn’t want to spook your friends.” Atropa’s tone was so condescending, just oozing with smug superiority.

Alice finally relaxed back into her chair, putting her face in her hands. She was dripping sweat onto the table.

“You’re doing so well. This is only the second time you’ve heard me and you’re being so strong already!”

“... W.. What.. What is this?”

“This? Do you mean the way that my voice makes you feel, cutie?”

“... Yes,” Alice choked her answer out, clenching her fists to fight the induced terror.

“I’m afraid that it’s simply how I am, sweet thing. You have my sympathies.”

“.. Okay. It.. It’s fine.”

Something inside Atropa stirred at Alice’s words. While no affini would ever explicitly insult her, she had also never been told, by anyone, that she was fine the way she was. Alice lacked the context and understanding for her admission to be truly meaningful, but it still made Atropa shift happily in her seat.

“Aww, look at you! So brave.”

“.. Yeah, well.. Listen. About um.. About all this…” Alice coughed on her own spit and doubled over.

“Oh, sweet thing! Take your time, please. Don’t push yourself.”

Yet, Alice was getting used to it. “I’m fine,” she insisted. “... About.. About th.. this.. I… Nevermind, okay?”

“... Nevermind?” Atropa asked with an amused tone, raising the closest approximation that her face had of an eyebrow.

“.. Y.. Yeah. I.. I mean, I.. Look.. I just, I didn’t.. I don’t..”

“Shhh, shhh. Calm yourself, sweet little thing. I am only here to observe.”

Alice visibly relaxed, tension leaving her body like air from a balloon. Her shoulders sagged and she slumped against the back of her chair.

“That’s it, darling. Relax.” Even when Atropa tried to be comforting, the nature of her voice and biorhythm made it sound so untrustworthy, like a predator luring prey into a trap. It wasn’t Atropa’s fault, she genuinely did want Alice to feel better. She cared just as deeply for all sophonts as any member of her kind would.

“... So.. You’re just.. Watching us?”

“For your safety,” Atropa clarified. “I will also continue to check up on you, personally.” Alice noticed that that was not an offer. It was a statement.

“... Alright.”

“Do you have access to water?”

Alice stared blankly at the screen. Had the eldritch space creature just asked if she had… Water? What?

“... Yes?”

“Why don’t you fetch it and return to your seat. Then, you will hydrate.”

Alice’s hair stiffened. A confusing mix of feelings bubbled up the back of her neck and into her head. Why was this thing so… Motherly? Was it motherly? Or was Alice losing her mind? It was so scary sounding that just a single word from Atropa’s mouth made Alice want to run for her life. Yet, at the same time, she seemed somehow strangely invested in Alice’s safety and health. It was so confusing.

“... Okay.” Alice stood, shakily, and made her way to a pile of nearby crates. She retrieved a dented metal canister, then sat back down, unscrewing it. Alice put her lips to the opening and drank. There was a strange feeling to drinking on someone’s instructions. Somehow, it was different than just getting herself some water of her own volition. What was that feeling? Alice couldn’t name it.

“Have you been eating sufficiently?”

“... I guess,” Alice replied, quizzically. She was so completely thrown off by this that she didn’t know what to think.

“Have you harmed yourself?”

“What? N-No!” She answered, sounding shocked and offended. Then, she heard it. The sound of something sliding or, maybe tapping? Some kind of repetitive motion on the other end of the line.

“Wait,” Alice said, “Are… Are you taking notes on me?”

“Of course,” Atropa replied matter of factly.

Alice really did not know how to feel about that, either.

“... So what’s your deal?” Alice finally asked.

After a delay, which she could only assume was Atropa focused on her notations, the affini replied. “Before that, may I just say that you are doing stellar, little thing. Look at you, almost speaking without pause.” Then again, being in person with her would be very different, Atropa mused to herself.

Alice blushed. Why did it keep praising her? She didn’t reply. She didn’t even know how to reply to that.

“As for our deal, as you put it, the Affini Compact’s objective is plainly happiness for all sentient beings.”

Alice choked on her water. It was so corny and unbelievable. Not just defending their invasion but actually going so far as to proclaim unconditional benevolence. Who could possibly buy that at face value? After a lifetime being crushed by the capitalist machine of her society, she couldn’t even conceive of anyone or anything genuinely having such cartoonishly benign motivations.

“... So.. Why are you.. Like.. Kidnapping or killing us?”

“We would never hurt you. The humans you’ve lost contact with are most likely living very happy and fulfilling lives within the Affini Compact. Have you not seen the broadcasts?”

“... The what?”

Atropa sighed. So the videos of happily domesticated colonies hadn’t reached all the way out here. Perhaps the Terran government was censoring them. Most likely. The hyperspace drone which updated Mariposa’s internet every so often was owned and controlled wholly by those who would not want such pro-affini sentiments shared with their workers.

“You are safe,” Atropa insisted. “I am only sorry that I cannot intervene directly, at this time. At least, not without justification.”

“... It’s… It’s fine,” Alice answered with a bit of relief. She was thankful that, at least allegedly, Atropa had no intention of abducting all her friends. She felt a lot of regret for not thinking about the other lives on this station. Grief made her lose sight of the kind of person she wanted to be.

After a moment, Alice dared to ask something else.

“... Are you alone?”

Atropa blinked. After a pause, she concluded that what Alice probably meant was: are there other affini monitoring the station? Surely it wasn’t a question about Atropa’s personal life.

“I am.”

“... You’re really far from… The rest of them,” Alice stated solemnly.

Them? Oh, Atropa realized Alice meant the affini.

“Yes,” she replied without emotion.

There was a long silence. Then Alice said, quietly, under her breath…

“Must be lonely.”

Atropa flinched, clenching all of her vines, piercing the cushions with thorns. It only took her a moment to collect herself, but she had not expected that. It tugged at her heart strings. This cute little thing, thinking of her at a time like this. Atropa couldn’t imagine the kind of compassion it took for a human in Alice’s position to say that.

Before Atropa could answer, there was a sound on the other side of the feed. Metal against metal. Something falling? Then, a man’s voice. She remained dead silent, for Alice’s safety and the safety of every human on that asteroid.

“I knew you were a slimy little bitch, but this?”

Alice turned with a start, freezing up at the sound of him. Her face contorted into a mix of pain, rage, and fear. He was a little over six feet tall, broad shoulders straining the fabric of a filthy uniform. His wide face twisted into a self-satisfied grin, square teeth bared with violent intent, like a mangy dog.

“Gabriel-” Alice started to say, voice catching in her throat. On the other end of the line, Atropa recognized the sound of Alice’s panic with growing concern.

He approached the table, cracking his knuckles and neck. “Keepin’ secrets?” He asked menacingly with all the glee of a heartless psychopath whose crimes had just become justified in his eyes. He reached out over the laptop and Alice shouted.

“Atropa, help me!”

Gabriel’s fist came down, slamming the lid shut and crushing it, cutting the feed. Alice ran, sprinting to the opposite end of the room, stumbling, only to be stopped by two more figures in the doorway. Rick and Eddie. They had horrified expressions on their faces. The way they looked at her, Alice couldn’t bear it.

“Alice,” Eddie said gently, but with cruel judgment in his eyes. “... Gabriel asked me to monitor the comms tonight. I… I heard everything.”

“I told you she was fucking trash,” Gabriel declared viciously, smiling wide behind her. The others didn’t seem very pleased to be cooperating with him, but his abuse of her had gone all but forgotten in the face of these accusations. “She’s a vindictive little monster! She’d bring the whole fuckin’ station down along with every one’uh you!”

“Did you really sell us out to those… Things?” Rick asked with sadness and disgust.

“This can’t.. You.. But… I…” Alice felt her airway closing. She couldn’t breathe. She was glancing around frantically, sweaty, looking for an exit. Several others had gathered. They all looked at her like she was a monster. A traitor. No. Stop! Don’t look at me like that! Then, Alice spotted Lora.

“Lora, it’s not what it looks like!” She pleaded.

Lora stared at Alice for a moment, her face unreadable. Then, she ducked away in silence, allowing some of the men to step in front of her.

“Lora!” Alice cried.

Tears filled her eyes. She was beginning to hyperventilate, whipping her head around, desperate and panicked. Bodies and hands closed in on her. Her head felt light. “S.. Stop! I didn’t-!”

Eddie gave a grim order. “Throw her in the back room and… Do whatever you have to.”

Chapter 6: The Nightmare

Chapter Text

Alice was dizzy. Her vision swam with illusions and afterimages as she blinked awake. Then, the cold hit her. So cold. Her body was wet and the water was freezing. Is that what woke her up? She tried to move, but her arms and legs refused. Was she dead? Was this what it felt like to die? Or perhaps Alice had simply stumbled and fallen into some strange, dark, frigid world, never to be found again. These were not serious, literal thoughts, but the idle imaginings of a woman whose grasp on reality was slipping.

Hollow. She felt hollow. Empty. Her skin was numb to the touch. Around Alice, there were lights and sounds, but she did not register them. Even the words of a person standing right next to her were practically inaudible, as though she were underwater.

She ignored them.

Everything started to hurt. Feeling was returning to her and she didn’t like it. She wanted to stay numb forever. Alas, reality was merciless. It began to claw its way back into her brain, inch by inch.

Everything hurt so badly.

Now, Alice could feel why her limbs were immobilized. Tight, unyielding leather dug into the soft skin of her bare wrists and ankles. It stung, but could not compare to the throbbing soreness that permeated most of her body. Her jaw hurt to move. Her flesh was colored with fresh, new bruises, blossoming in vibrant color. She was sitting in some kind of chair. Attached to it, more like. Alice groaned miserably.

“There you are, bitch,” a voice pierced her foggy brain. A man’s voice. Who was it?

She still couldn’t make out their faces. How many were there? Two? Three? Alice was still too delirious to tell. The room was spinning. Where was she?

“Now, we are going to try this again,” a different voice said. Also male, but a bit more formal. There was the slightest spark of panic hidden in his otherwise professional and measured tone, as though he were truly desperate to accomplish his goal here. As though his life depended on it. He probably thought it did.

“Cooper,” Alice muttered, her vision coming into focus.

The company man was standing over her, tight suit unkempt, tie loosened and undershirt unbuttoned. He looked sweaty and upset. She thought so, anyway. Scared. He was scared. They were all so scared.

Gabriel was behind him, along with… Was that Murphy in the back, holding an empty bucket? Alice squinted, scarcely making out his portly, nervous form. It was. He must have thrown ice water on her.

Cooper grabbed her chin, roughly, with his hand. She felt the black leather of his glove as he forced her to face him and look into his eyes.

“How many are there?”

Alice blinked vacantly. Confused. Cooper sighed with impatient frustration.

“How many affini are aware of our location?”

Alice’s head lolled to one side and she couldn’t help but giggle, sounding deranged.

“Fifty,” she replied sarcastically. She knew her answers didn’t matter. Nothing would satisfy these people. They were scared shitless and this was the end. She would be tortured to death to satisfy their paranoia. She was certain of that.

Cooper slapped her across the face, hard. The blow snapped her out of her stupor. It rang in her ears and shot aching pain up through her brain where it had collided with the inside of her skull. Her jaw stung and she felt a tooth loosen. Tears welled in Alice’s eyes.

“..O.. One.. One!” She replied, choking on her words.

“Good,” Cooper replied coldly. He grabbed her chin again to steady her head. “Is this the creature that you called Atropa? Did you call it here to this station?”

Alice was becoming horribly present in her own beaten body. She began to sob, hiccuping, fat tears rolling down over her cheeks and soaking her bare chest. Only now did Alice realize that she had been stripped naked down to her waist and was wearing only trousers, though she couldn’t even spare the thought to find fresh agony in that revelation. The physical pain was too great to worry about her dignity.

“Answer me,” Cooper growled.

“Lemme rough her up again,” Gabriel offered with the stupid giddiness of an animal that was incapable of thinking more than a few minutes ahead. He hardly seemed concerned by the situation. Rather, this whole incident had essentially cleared Gabriel of any charges against him. Abusing a monstrous traitor like Alice was not only accepted, but perhaps even admirable.

“No,” Cooper barked at Gabriel with growing frustration, “We need her lucid. You went too hard on her before I arrived, you braindead oaf.”

Gabriel tensed with the instinct to square up with Cooper, reacting like a beast who’d been challenged by a competing male. In the end, however, Cooper’s authority won out in Gabriel’s altogether simple mind. He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. “Whatever.”

“Now,” Cooper turned back to Alice. “Did you call this affini, this Atropa, to our station?”

“P-Please.. Please stop.. Stop t.. This…” Alice was crying so hard that her chest was constricting and it was hard to breathe. “L.. Let me go…”

Cooper furrowed his brow. “Murphy. Pliers.”

Murphy hesitated only for a moment, then slowly extracted a pair of heavy, metal pliers from his tool belt and passed them to Cooper.

“I.. I did! I did…!” Alice confessed desperately between sobs, writhing in her binds. She struggled violently, pulling at her arms, digging the cuffs into her wrists until they bled.

“Good,” Cooper replied, tapping the pliers against his open palm. “Now. How much time do we have?”

Alice could hardly breathe. Her face was a mess of tears, snot, sweat, and blood. “I.. Wh.. What?!” She didn’t understand his question, but she wanted to. She would say anything, do anything, to make the pain stop.

Cooper sighed tensely. “How long until it arrives? When will the affini be here?”

“I.. I don’t…” Alice started to say, only to stop when she felt Cooper’s black gloved hand take hold of her own. “Wait… W-Wait..!”

Cooper lined the pliers up with Alice’s pinky finger, right at the second joint. He affixed his gaze with her own, staring cold daggers into her eyes, daring her to call his bluff.

“I don’t know! I.. I really.. I really don’t know!”

She felt the pliers begin to close. The unyielding metal teeth dug gently into her skin. Cooper repeated himself, grimly.

“When. Will. It. Be. Here?”

The lights went out.


“I always knew something was off about that one,” Keyla said, sitting at a desk behind Eddie. Around them, electronics lined the walls and ceiling: communication equipment, security systems, monitors. This was the beating heart of the station.

“I- Okay,” Eddie replied shortly. He was frantically checking on the state of their meager ground-to-space defenses and didn’t really have the mental bandwidth to be engaged in what his wife was saying. They were a mining station. They didn’t have weapons. What they did have was a short range laser intended to break apart any large space debris that might collide with the asteroid. It would have to do.

“I told you, I told you Lewis was off his rocker when he-” Keyla kept going.

Eddie really detested when she was like this. He couldn’t bring himself to defend Alice, after what she’d done. But it did make him deeply uncomfortable to hear Keyla so casually deadname and misgender a former friend. They’d lived with Alice for years. Maybe it was just Eddie’s soft heart, but he really hated this. He hated all this so much.

Not enough to save her. Not enough to defend her.

“I think… Maybe we can use this,” Eddie said, calibrating the laser.

“Or we could leave,” Keyla offered.

“... We only have a ship with supplies for two people,” Eddie replied.

“Right. You and me,” Keyla said. “We get off this rock and start over. Your folks will help us, they’re loaded with cash. It’ll work out.”

Eddie pinched the bridge of his nose. “And… Abandon everyone to their fate?”

Keyla stood and walked up behind him, wrapping her arms around Eddie’s neck from behind. “Don’t you want to keep me safe?” She asked, manipulatively.

The lights went out.

“What the fuck?!” Keyla exclaimed. She began to panic, groping around in the dark. Eddie sprang into action.

“That sound,” he said, “It couldn’t be… Did you hear a noise?” He asked her.

“I didn’t hear anything.”

“... Like a dull thump,” Eddie continued under his breath. “It couldn’t be. An EMP?”

He felt his way over to an adjacent wall and opened a locker, pulling out a flashlight and flicking it on. Except, it didn’t work. Had something happened to it, too? He continued to search, eventually finding matches, and lit one.

“Can’t be. All this stuff is shielded,” Keyla stated confidently.

Eddie opened one of the panels and held the small fire up to the circuitry.

“... It’s all fried.”

“But. But it’s shielded!” Keyla argued, as though her being right was more important than their safety in the present moment. “We need to leave, now, Eddie!”

Eddie just knelt there, staring at the open panel.

“It’s fried, Keyla.”

“What?”

Eddie sat down. He placed the flashlight in his lap with resignation.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Keyla exclaimed.

“... The ship will be fried too,” Eddie explained with a somber tone of acceptance. “Nobody is going anywhere.”


Rick was looking around in the dark, reaching out and feeling along the walls. It was so sudden! What was going on?! He managed to find the opening of his room and pulled himself inside, then shut the door tightly behind, cranking the wheel several rotations until he couldn’t seal it any tighter.

He groped under his cot blindly, extracting a crowbar. It wasn’t much, but it was something. Then, in the pitch blackness of his quarters, Rick sat on his cot and waited, the heavy iron tool resting across his hand.

The silence was deafening. Seconds felt like hours. Beads of sweat ran down over Rick’s forehead and face.

Just when he was beginning to hope that nothing would happen, a terrible sound. Like metal grinding against… Something. The room shook. Was the entire station shaking? What had just happened? It only lasted a moment. After that, everything grew still and quiet again. What was that?

Rick moved to the porthole. He looked out into space, glancing around at the stars, frantically. Then, he saw it. A ship like a sleek, black needle, almost invisible against the void. A sort of donut encircled the pointed craft, just as dark in hue. Vine-like extrusions were clinging to the side of the station, holding the alien vessel firmly against it.

And not just anywhere. Rick realized with horror that that location corresponded roughly with the station’s maintenance airlocks.

A distant scream startled him away from the window. Rick fell onto his ass, raising the crowbar instinctively and shaking all over. Another scream, a little closer, suddenly cut short. Then, a loud bang on his door, causing him to jump.

“Rick! Let me in!”

It was Lora, he realized. She was crying and shouting. He’d never heard her so scared in his life. Rick didn’t respond. Her pleading only got louder and more desperate. Guilt burned in the back of his mind, but he was too afraid. His teeth were chattering. Yet, the fear he felt in that moment was nothing compared to what would come next.

Lora went silent.

Then, he could feel it, out there. The air was electric with the creature’s presence. Its movements made no sound, and yet, Rick knew it was right outside his door. There was something imperceptible rolling off of the monster’s body. The atmosphere around it was unnaturally uncomfortable and disturbing. It made Rick’s skin crawl.

The door jostled. He almost screamed.

“... Poor thing,” a voice said, muffled by the thick steel. Yet, even with a barrier between them, the sound of its words made Rick freeze up. His grip slackened and the crowbar clattered to the floor. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t think.

“Don’t worry. It will be over soon,” the affini assured him, sounding more menacing and terrible than anything he’d ever heard in his life.

Rick was so transfixed by the horrific, hypnotic tones of this thing’s words that he almost didn’t even notice that something was beginning to seep inside the chamber. The bottom of the steel door had been adjusted ever so slightly by something pushing against the other side. Pushing with enough force to bend it. And the monster did not need to bend it much, only enough to create the tiniest gap.

He could barely see it in the dark. The light of the stars through the porthole illuminated the opening dimly. In that shallow half-light, Rick witnessed the end. A purple mist was creeping inside, growing thicker by the minute. He could smell it. It smelled sweet, like wine.

Rick felt light-headed. The room began to spin. He couldn’t keep his eyes open. Until his last moment of consciousness, he remained utterly terrified. Then, darkness.


That should be a low enough dose that it doesn’t kill them, Atropa thought to herself. Hoped, rather. Her poison, in extremely small doses, had an anesthetic property. In aerosol form, she theorized that their exposure would remain well below lethal levels, though Atropa had never tested this before. It certainly wasn’t good for them, but the xenoveterinarians would sort that out when they arrived.

The other affini had to come, now. Atropa had left them no choice. While they were, indeed, extremely busy and did not have time for this, they would make time. She’d already sent them an explanation of the events up to this point, before acting. At the end of the day, no matter how thin the affini were spread, their priority would always be the preservation of sophont life above all else. Her peers could not ignore this. They certainly wouldn’t be happy with her, but they would come. She had forced their hand.

Right now, she needed to focus on saving Alice. And the rest of the humans, Atropa reminded herself, surprised that she had thought any differently for a moment. Don’t get attached.

She glanced idly down at the small, soft, fragile creature resting in her vines. She did not know that its name was Lora, but when the noxious gas had knocked her out, Atropa had caught the little thing before it hit the floor. The human still had such a horrified expression on her face. Atropa tingled at the sight of it, her thorns standing up with excitement.

“Why must they be so, so cute when they’re scared,” Atropa lamented. Why must I be like this? She thought, but did not say.

The purple fumes began to recede, reabsorbed into the base of Atropa’s body. Once she was certain that the area was clear, she gently laid Lora down onto the floor, brushing a stray hair off her forehead with one tendril.

“Sleep well, little one.”


Alice couldn’t think. Her head was pounding. She heard another collision, but barely felt it. Something striking her face. Was it a fist? That’s right. That’s what it was. Gabriel was hitting her. For how long? Alice didn’t know. Her skin was swelling. She couldn’t open her left eye. Not that it would do her much use, anyway. None of them could see a thing in this darkness.

“That isn’t helping!” Cooper shouted, finally losing his cool.

“This bitch got us all fuckin’ killed,” Gabriel replied, louder. It seemed that his small brain had finally put two and two together and concluded that they were in trouble. However, a man like Gabriel could not feel any emotion besides anger. Rather, if he did, it would quickly be converted into rage. “She deserves to die too!”

Suddenly, the room was illuminated by a tiny glow, emitting from the flame of a simple petrol lighter in Murphy’s shaky hands.

Alice could see, now. Just barely, and only out of one eye. The barrel of a gun. Gabriel was holding a pistol inches away from her forehead. Yet, she didn’t really feel anything. So, this is how it ends, Alice thought. Somehow, she couldn’t even bring herself to feel afraid or sad. She just felt… Nothing. She was about to be nothing. So none of it mattered, anyway.

And yet, nobody was doing anything. No one was saying anything. They were all frozen stiff. Before Alice saw why, she felt it. The air was thick and oppressive. Discomfort creeped up through her body, wriggling under her skin. She’d never felt anything so deeply unsettling in her life.

Then, she saw her.

Looming in the dim, flickering light of Murphy’s lighter was a shape. It rose well above the man, making him look somehow so small by comparison. This thing filled the end of the chamber, crouching so that its head did not scrape the ceiling. There was something vaguely humanoid about its shape, but only vaguely. Limbs that could have been mistaken for those belonging to a person, though much too large, were concealed inside a cloak of hundreds, maybe thousands of slick, black tendrils. The outer vines were covered in sharp thorns, while the inner vines were smooth and had a strange shine to them, like latex. Crowning this monument of pure terror, something almost resembling a face gazed down at the humans, its burning red eyes transfixed on them. Slowly, the approximation of lips parted to reveal rows of razor sharp, gleaming silver thorns.

Nobody could move. Nobody could speak. Nobody could even breathe.

Atropa had restrained herself so well. Through great effort, she had withstood every urge and every dark desire that sizzled in the back of her mind. She had been so gentle and so soft with these little creatures. But now, witnessing the state of her new toy, she could resist it no longer.

Before they could react, Murphy had already been pressed face first into the floor, vines enveloping him as he screamed himself hoarse. It took only seconds for him to vanish inside of Atropa’s body, eyes wild and desperate before vanishing behind the curtain of tendrils. His lighter bounced on the floor and went out.

The room flashed as Gabriel fired his gun at Atropa’s grinning face. The bullet buried itself in the thick, dark wood of her mask. She didn’t even flinch. The second time he fired, she was closer. Then, it went pitch black again. He fired a third time and she was upon him. The flash briefly revealed Cooper, held up against the left wall by a vine wrapped snugly around his neck, legs kicking. His struggles slowed to a stop and he went limp.

A tendril ensnared the firearm and wrenched it up towards the ceiling. The fourth shot accomplished nothing except momentarily illuminating Gabriel’s nightmare.

“I think I might have heard about you,” Atropa cooed with sadistic glee, absolutely giddy to have him in her clutches.

In the darkness, Gabriel felt his gun torn from his hand with such ease. The strength of his grip was nothing to her. A cold, hard hand, bigger than his chest, ensnared his shoulder, back, and chest. Atropa’s claws dug rivets into his flesh. He opened his mouth, but before any sound could come out, thick vines shot inside and wormed their way down his throat. Gabriel kicked and punched her, until one of his swings met Atropa’s other hand. She gripped his fist tightly, then, with all the ease of snapping a twig, bent his arm too far one way until it broke. Gabriel’s eyes filled with tears, but his would-be wailing only met the merciless girth of Atropa’s invasive tendrils, lodged halfway to his stomach. Finally, mercifully, he lost consciousness.


Atropa took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Fire, she cursed herself, That was too much.

She concentrated, summoning up a soft illumination from her red eyes, just enough light to make sure that they were okay. Then, Atropa looked down at the poor creature unconscious in her arms with a sharp pang of guilt. She’d lost control. Atropa slowly lowered Gabriel to the floor, onto his back, and checked his neck with one vine. A pulse. Good. He was alive. Her peers could easily fix a broken arm. Thank goodness.

Next, she turned her eyes to Alice. On no.

Alice was staring right at her, one eye swollen shut and the other locked wide open, red light flickering in her horrified gaze. Her pupil was a tiny pinprick, trembling in place. She was completely terrified. The kind of terror that one could not so easily forget. Alice had felt fear during her communications with Atropa, but never like this. Now that the affini was right in front of her… Now that she’d seen what Atropa could and would do to a person…

Well. That’s that, I suppose, Atropa concluded with sorrow. Alice would be afraid of her forever, now. She sighed, then composed herself. It isn’t as though she could care for a human, anyway. It didn’t really matter what Alice thought of her.

Atropa sliced off Alice’s bindings with little effort. The girl was in a sorry state. It broke Atropa’s heart to see her like this. She was beaten so badly that she likely couldn’t walk on her own.

“Sit tight, little one,” Atropa whispered sadly.

She turned away to quickly check the other humans. Cooper and Murphy were unconscious on the opposite side of the storeroom. Atropa bent over, reaching down to check their vitals. Alive. Everyone was alive. She exhaled with great relief. Atropa could never have forgiven herself if she’d accidentally taken sentient life.

Alice watched the dim light of Atropa’s eyes rotate out of view. She swallowed, hard. Her head hurt so badly that she could barely think. Miraculously, her life had not ended. That realization lit up her self-preservation instincts like a match to gasoline. She was alive and she wanted to live. I want to live!

Fighting through the agony and the haze and the fear, Alice struggled to move. She managed to slide halfway out of her seat. Her eyes fell on Gabriel’s unconscious body with mixed emotions. Then, she saw the pistol. She reached for it, desperately, only to collapse onto the floor in a crumpled, pathetic pile. Moaning with agony, Alice hooked her fingers around the weapon and forced it into the wide pocket of her pants, tucking it out of view.

She could do no more except lay there, her strength spent and consciousness fading. The last thing Alice saw was Atropa, turning to look down at her. The affini’s face was unreadable. Was that pity? She didn’t have time to think about it. Her mind was fading. She felt something lifting her into the air, but she was already too far gone to even question what it was.

“I’ve got you, petal,” Atropa said softly.

She’d never called her that before.