Archive of Our Own ^beta

Rose bushes lined the front of the building, as if, with the addition of color, the wrought-iron fencing enclosing the entire property wouldn’t make it seem like so much of a prison. Nick clutched at his duffel bag as Juliette shook hands with the doctor, as Hank whistled at the fountain with the angel sculpture spewing water out of her mouth, as the gates behind them closed with a quick shnick.

“Pretty nice, huh?” Hank asked Nick, who grimaced and held his bag tighter.

“It looks like she’s puking,” he muttered. The urge to do so himself threatened at the back of his throat, and he drew in a shaky breath to steady his stomach. This was temporary. He’d be out in days, if that.

“Think of it like a much-needed vacation,” Renard had told him - or, more like threatened him. Nick hadn’t had much of a choice.

Him, in a mental hospital. But it was temporary. It had to be.

“Hey…” Hank said, catching Nick by the shoulder and giving him a squeeze. “It’ll be good, you’ll see. All those monsters you’ve been seeing will be nothing but a bad dream after this.”

“This feels like a bad dream,” Nick told him, shaking him off. “I don’t need to be here. I’m not crazy!”

“Please, Mr. Burkhardt,” the doctor spoke up from his place beside Juliette. The name tag on his white coat read Dr. Harvey Rodrick, and he wore a pair of designer glasses that glinted in the morning light. He was holding a file folder, at the top of which was labeled Burkhardt, Nicholas. “Don’t think of it like that. Everyone needs help sometimes, and we are here for that.”

Juliette smiled at Nick and said to him, “Honey, please.”

Nick pursed his lips to keep them shut. Dark circles had formed under Juliette’s eyes, and her hair had the shine of grease to it that meant she hadn’t washed it in a while - she’d been burning the candle at both ends trying to secure him a spot in this place, and all he’d been able to do was lock himself in their room, away from the faces that twisted into monsters before his very eyes.

Nothing had helped. It just kept happening, and when they had started attacking him, he’d had no choice but to fight back.

He’d been charged with violent assault, and given two options: prison, or the psychiatric hospital. Despite everything in him saying this is real, Nick had pleaded insanity. And now, here he was, and he wasn’t allowed to leave until Dr. Rodrick decided he wasn’t a threat to society.

Hank squeezed his shoulder again. Juliette wasn’t the only one with circles under her eyes, though Hank had powered through Nick’s breakdown with a smile plastered on his face. He’d been the pillar of support for Juliette that Nick was supposed to be, stepping in to help her when he couldn’t. But who was helping Hank? Nick forced a smile for their sake, saying, “Right. Thanks.”

“If it’s any comfort,” Dr. Rodrick said, “it’s not uncommon for us to help policemen get back on their feet after rough cases.”

Rough cases. As if watching Aunt Marie get killed by one of those monsters was a rough case. She had just told him she was dying of cancer. She had said she needed to tell him something, something about family heritage and Grimms and none of it mattered because in the end she had died in his arms and Nick might’ve been the best shot in the PPD but that still wasn’t enough to save her. No, that hadn’t been a rough case. That had been a nightmare, and every day after had been hell.

Still, Nick said, “Great.”

“How long do you think he’ll be here for?” Juliette asked Dr. Rodrick.

Dr. Rodrick shook his head with a sigh. “That’ll depend on you, Nick. We can give you the tools, but you have to be willing to use them.”

“Nick’s handy,” Hank said, patting Nick on the shoulder. “He’ll be fixed in no time.”

Nick’s smile cracked. He wasn’t broken - then again, maybe he was. If any of his suspects had told him they saw people turning into monsters he would’ve sent them straight here, too. But he didn’t just see them, the monsters reacted to him, and that’s what made them so hard to ignore. He couldn’t exactly will away a charging lizard man.

Dr. Rodrick tutted. “We don’t say that here. Please be mindful of your language.”

“Uh - sorry?” Hank looked at Nick as if the apology was meant for him, and Nick shrugged because it was true.

“If that’s all, we should get you inside,” Dr. Rodrick said to Nick. “We need to get you settled in and start your evaluation.”

“Of course,” Juliette said, though her lower lip trembled as if she might cry. She stepped up to Nick and wrapped him in a tight hug, whispering in his ear, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” he whispered back. He’d get better. He had to, for her.

When she pulled back Hank took her place, dragging Nick into a bear hug that squeezed the breath out of him. Hank whispered into his ear, “You better get out of here, partner.”

“Count on it,” Nick promised, squeezing him back.

Hank released him, and Nick cast him and Juliette one last glance before following Dr. Rodrick up the stairs and into the building. The door opened with a tap of Dr. Rodrick’s badge, and closed without so much as a click. Inside the walls were white, the floor was white, the front desk was white - everything lacked the color of the rosebushes outside. Dr. Rodrick nodded at the receptionist behind the desk, who nodded back, and then he led Nick further in, scanning his badge again to get past another set of doors leading further into the building.

They walked down a hallway lined with doors, at the end of which Dr. Rodrick turned to one and opened it, waving Nick inside. The room was small, fitting only a cot and a plastic chair. Dr. Rodrick closed the door behind them and then sat on the chair, gesturing for Nick to sit on the bed. Nick sat, clutching his duffel bag to his chest.

“I read your file,” Dr. Rodrick said, flipping through Nick’s file. “You’ve been seeing people’s faces… change? Into monsters.”

Nick nodded.

“Describe them to me,” Dr Rodrick said.

“They’re… they look animalistic. Like werewolves, except it’s more than just wolves.”

Dr. Rodrick made a note in the file. “And what other animals have you seen?”

Nick tried to peer into the file, but couldn’t see what was written from his angle. “Lizards. Birds. Pigs? I don’t know, some of them were just plain ugly.”

“Alright.” Another note. “And it says that you attacked one of them?”

“They attacked me!”

Dr. Rodrick stopped writing. He studied Nick, and then set the folder onto the ground and leaned forward in his chair, and there was something about the way he was looking at Nick that made the back of his neck prickle. Dr. Rodrick asked, “Did they look like this?”

And he turned into a monster.

His face transformed into something with a beak sharp enough to pluck out eyes, and Nick squeezed his shut with a cry and launched himself backwards, tumbling off of the bed and onto the ground in a heap. 

It wasn’t real. It wasn’t.

The door opened, and burly men flooded the room, all heading straight for Nick. Nick shrank back into the corner behind the cot, his voice cracking as he told them, “I didn’t do anything! I didn’t hurt anyone!”

They pinned him down anyway, and one of them held up a syringe. Nick flinched away from it but the hands on him held him in place, and that needle slid into his bicep, the medicine burning as it was administered. The men didn’t let him go though, not even as Nick’s struggles became sluggish and his frantic breaths began to slow.

Dr. Rodrick appeared behind them, and he looked human once more. He said, “I had heard there was a Grimm in Portland. Don’t worry, Mr. Burkhardt. We’ll make sure you never see another monster again.”

Grimm.

Like Aunt Marie had said. Like all the monsters had shouted at him before they attacked. Dr. Rodrick had just called him that too.

Nick wasn’t crazy.

But he couldn’t even struggle anymore, could hardly keep his eyes open to look at the man who knew Nick wasn’t crazy and had admitted him into his care anyway - who was the only one who could release Nick from this prison. Nick forced his thick tongue around the words, “You… knew.”

“Suspected. We don’t get a lot of your kind coming through here.” Dr. Rodrick snapped his fingers at the orderlies, saying, “Take him to solitary. This one will be with us for a long time.”

“Don’t…” Nick mumbled, but the edges of his vision closed in, and the world went dark.