Comment on stay

  1. mundanite on Chapter 1 Sun 26 Feb 2023 10:25PM UTC

    THERE ARE SO MANY PROMISING GOOD THINGS HERE. First off, your writing is so nice. So, so nice. Also! I love NoteInABottle and their take on these two so much, so knowing they contributed in some parts is reassuring and makes me excited! There is such poetry and a very well maintained balance of seriousness and tragedy in the characters and what has happened to them- Bam finally cracking and his power quite literally exploding? That was horrible, so bad in a way that I was hooked right from the start to see how he will go about the change.

    And I love what I have seen from Khun thus far. He expects to be alone, for betrayal. He runs calculations and how he came to think that he was important enough, just short enough to be sacrificed for the team is so interesting; so heartbreaking. Bam is so desperate for him not to leave that it is the unexpected cataylst to his power reacting to his fear. Having to face that and then be sent to a 'Nightmare Floor'...

    I really love the direction of this so far, the metaphors (tension a spider weaving webs. Not a ripped wing, not an impaled sword, but a puppet string—and Bam, at its end, a marionette to his own loneliness.) are glorious and I am enjoying this!

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