Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It all starts when Namjoon walks into Taehyung’s room.

      Nothing is off about it, nothing to indicate that something… unusual is going on. No weird sounds, no weird behavior from Taehyung when he last saw him. Taehyung didn’t appear tired, even after such a busy day, so Namjoon isn’t worried that he might be sleeping. The man had been annoying the fuck out of every member all day, and, frankly, Namjoon was kind of hesitant about even going into his room for fear of riling him up again. He was just going to let Taehyung settle down for the evening and Namjoon was going to conk out for a bit before dinner, but as soon as Namjoon got into his own room he saw a familiar jacket hanging from his bedpost. It was flashy, kind of tacky, ridiculously patterned—Taehyung’s, obviously. Namjoon recalled chasing Taehyung and Jimin out of his room this morning as they were getting ready to leave for interviews. The men had decided to wander in and get into a wrestling match on his bed. Taehyung must have left his jacket behind then. So, Namjoon sighed and grabbed up the jacket, walking down the hall to Taehyung’s room to return it.

      He doesn’t knock, decides to get Taehyung back for just barging into his room earlier that day. Besides, Taehyung doesn’t have a lock on his door. That signals to everyone in the complex that his room is fair game, and Taehyung knows this. Namjoon thinks that Taehyung actually enjoys fueling the coming-in-unannounced game they play. He had no right to complain if Namjoon decided to play his game as well. In fact, Taehyung should expect it. So Namjoon slowly, quietly turns the doorknob and flings the door open dramatically, wanting Taehyung to regret being such a nuisance lately.

      Instead, Namjoon finds he is the one dealing with regret.

      Because, on Taehyung’s bed sits Taehyung, completely naked, his clothes as carelessly tossed aside as the jacket Namjoon has draped over his arm. And standing in front of him, completely clothed except for his hard dick sticking out of his fly, is Seokjin. Namjoon stares at his dick for a moment, not believing what he is seeing, startled to see that it’s glistening and that Taehyung’s lips are glistening in the exact same way. Seokjin’s hand is in Taehyung’s hair and Taehyung has a hold of his hyung’s hips. They both turn their heads to look at him as soon as he opens the door. Taehyung’s mouth drops open… well, further than it already was.

      “Uh…” Namjoon deadpans, feeling as if he weighs a whole two-hundred pounds heavier. He is rooted to the spot, his muscles not responding to his brain’s screams for him to leave. Now.

      Thankfully, Seokjin seems just slightly less mortified than Namjoon. His hyung’s brows knit together in an expression of indignation—something not usually seen on his face. “Why the hell are you just standing there?” Seokjin exclaims. “Get out!”

      Namjoon keeps standing there. Stutters a bit.

      “Leave!” Taehyung shouts.

      “S-s-sorry!” Namjoon stammers and practically dives out of the room, closing the door a bit too hard behind him. Once out in the hall, he doesn’t stop, his legs pumping as if making up for the fact that they’d stopped functioning earlier.

      He passes Yoongi, who is heading to his own room. The man frowns at him. “Um, Joon? You okay?”

      But Namjoon’s mouth is dry, and it doesn’t matter anyway. Because his legs don’t stop moving, and he blows right on past Yoongi without saying a word.

      He gets back to his room and quickly shuts the door. After a second of thought, he locks it. Yoongi might decide to pay him a visit after their encounter in the hallway, and he doesn’t blame him; Namjoon figures he must look pretty worked up. He’s hyperventilating, scrambling to his bed and just sitting there, hands clutching the edge in white-knuckled horror. Why did he just walk in? Why didn’t he knock? Why? Was it worth it, Namjoon? Was it?

      He just caught his bandmates having sex. He caught his two best friends having sex. Well, about to have sex, but it isn’t like that makes much of a difference. Wait, no, that makes a hell of a lot of difference. He saw Seokjin’s dick. Sure, he’d seen it before, but not hard. Not having obviously been in Taehyung’s mouth. Oh shit, Taehyung. He’d been blowing Seokjin. Not like Namjoon had seen it, but he could infer what was going on just before he burst into the room like a complete moron. Is Taehyung gay? Is Seokjin gay? Namjoon is sure he would have noticed something like that, having lived with them for so long. Maybe they aren’t gay, maybe bi? He’s seen them both flirt with girls. Was that a front? How long has this been going on? Surely not the entire time they’ve been together. Does anyone else know? Can’t be. Namjoon considers himself very observant and just found out about it. Shit, this can’t be kept a secret. They need to call a meeting. How the hell is he going to bring this up? Should he just blurt it out or talk to Seokjin and Taehyung beforehand? Will this change the group? Will it cause them to split up?

      Although Namjoon didn’t feel like talking to anyone earlier, when he hears a knock on his door relief washes over him. He knows he must look like a wreck, but at least talking to someone will help him forget his concerns. He knows his friends. They wouldn’t press him if he refused to say what was bothering him.

      So he gets off his bed and opens the door. And if any color remains in his face, it’s now entirely gone.

      Because there, standing just a foot away, are Taehyung and Seokjin. Fuck.

      Seokjin is looking everywhere else but at Namjoon and Taehyung has his head ducked, as if he expects a scolding. “Um,” Taehyung says, his voice breaking a little. Namjoon wonders if it’s because he’s nervous or because his throat is sore from blowing Seokjin and immediately discards the thoughts from his mind. “Sorry, can we, um… come in?”

      Namjoon stands there, swallows dryly, considers. He wants to slam the door in their faces and run back to his bed, dive under the covers, try to come to grips with what he saw. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to even hold a conversation with these two, but Taehyung looks so ashamed and Seokjin is nervously scratching the back of his head, and Namjoon realizes that he is still their friend. He has to be there for them, no matter what. Besides, who else would they be able to talk to about this? Namjoon is leader of the group, dammit. He should be able to deal with stuff like this. He is obligated to.

      He motions for them to come in and quickly shuts and locks the door behind them. Taehyung takes a seat at the foot of Namjoon’s bed, still looking at the floor, while Seokjin stands awkwardly to the side, almost across the room from Taehyung. Namjoon sighs, puffing out his cheeks.

      This is going to be so fucking awkward.

      Namjoon wants to pace, but he knows that would make the situation worse. So he takes a chair from a small desk in the corner and plops down in it.

      For a good five minutes nothing is said. Seokjin clears his throat and keeps shifting from foot to foot. Taehyung is wringing his hands, more nervous than Namjoon has ever seen him. Namjoon heaves a sigh. He would have to start this conversation.

      “Um,” he says, and they both look at him. Namjoon stiffens, suddenly anxious that he is now the center of attention. He licks his lips, is reminded of Taehyung’s own lips when he stumbled upon him with Seokjin, and fights to keep down a blush. “So, uh, were you…?

      Namjoon wants to kick himself. Of course they were. He’d seen it with his own eyes! What the fuck else could they have been doing?

      Seokjin clears his throat again, arms folded over his chest. “Um… yeah. We were.”

      Namjoon bobs his head stupidly, watching Taehyung chew at his lips. “How long?”

      “Before you showed up,” Taehyung piped in, his eyes meeting Namjoon’s for only a moment before flickering elsewhere, “about five minutes.”

      “No, no,” Namjoon says, exasperated. “I mean, how long has this,”—he motions to both of them—“the two of you, been going on?”

      “Maybe three weeks?” Taehyung answers.

      Seokjin shakes his head. “Two. Two weeks.”

      “Nuh uh,” Taehyung flashes back. “Three. The kiss—”

      Seokjin ponders, looks like he’s recalling something. “Okay. Three weeks,” he amends.

      “Wait,” Namjoon interrupts, his mind whirring. “You guys kissed?” For some reason it surprises him more than walking in on Taehyung sucking Seokjin off.

      Taehyung bites his bottom lip, his face reddening a little. “Yeah. Three weeks ago.”

      “How?”

      Taehyung frowns in confusion. “With our mouths?”

      Namjoon sighs heavily and puts his head in his hands. “It was just random,” Seokjin supplies, interpreting Namjoon’s question. “Just… happened one day.”

      Namjoon looks up at Seokjin, eyebrow raised.

      “We were in the bathroom brushing our teeth,” Taehyung explains. “Then—”

      “I went to say goodnight and ended up hugging him, then kissing him on the lips,” Seokjin cuts in. His eyes wander again. “Situation reminded me of when I was living with an ex-girlfriend. We used to get ready for bed together and the bathroom was kind of tiny with both me and Taehyung in there. Brushed up against each other a lot. Got into that headspace.” Seokjin shrugged. “Was on autopilot, you know?”

      Namjoon nods as if he understands. Maybe he does. There was that one time not too long ago when he started talking to Yoongi like he was Rapmon. Cute baby talk and mush and everything. That was weird and embarrassing, but he’d been spending so much time with his dog that it just slipped out. Now Namjoon likes to talk to Yoongi like that sometimes just to see that disgusted face he knows he’ll make. Just to bother him. Sure, he didn’t accidentally kiss Yoongi, but he could see how he… might? Um…

      “An accident,” Taehyung reiterates. “He tried to apologize, got all flustered.” Seokjin blushes and Taehyung giggles. “I told him I was fine with it. From what little I felt, he was a good kisser. Nice soft lips.”

      “Shut up,” Seokjin says, smiling.

      “It’s true!”

      Namjoon stares at them as they go silent, failing to see how this progressed to Taehyung giving Seokjin blowjobs. “So… what? That it?”

      Taehyung shakes his head. “No. We started making out.”

      “How did you just ‘start making out’?” Namjoon says. “You don’t just start kissing your friends out of nowhere. I mean, remember that time with Hobi?” He looks pointedly at Seokjin. “You guys practically kissed in front of the cameras, but you didn’t start making out with him right after.” Namjoon considers the possibility that Hoseok may have willingly made out with Seokjin on other occasions without his knowledge. After all, Namjoon had caught Taehyung sucking Seokjin off. Anything is possible. “Right?”

      Seokjin cracks a smile, as if he knows where Namjoon’s mind is. “Well, that was in front of the cameras. And, no, me and Hobi haven’t kissed since. It’s just that—”

      “I mean, have you seen Jin hyung?” Taehyung insists, gesturing to him. “Tell me you don’t think he’s hot. ‘Worldwide handsome.’ Come on. You can’t blame me.”

      Namjoon squints at him. “Are you saying you’ve been… kinda gay for him for a while?”

      “Well,” Taehyung’s eyes roll up to the ceiling, thinking. “If you put it that way, I guess so. Maybe deep down I thought to myself, ‘if Jin was a girl, I would hit that.’ But then when the kiss happened, I figured why does he have to be a girl? I mean, it’s not like I’ll find a girl as pretty as Jin anyway, so…”

      “Tae,” Seokjin says, blushing even harder. “You’re rambling. Not that you aren’t right, but…”

      “That’s kinda reckless, you know,” Namjoon says. “If you made a move on Jin hyung and he rejected you, it might have harmed the entire group.”

      Taehyung looks as if he might object, but then he drops his gaze to his lap and wrings his hands. “Yeah, I wasn’t thinking. It just… I was touch-starved. It felt so good to have someone kiss me. Didn’t realize how much I missed it. We’ve just been so busy… so when Jin hyung tried to leave, I pulled him back and kissed him. That was probably pretty selfish of me, but it’s all worked out.”

      “And by that you mean it progressed to you blowing him?” Namjoon says, a bit shocked by his own bluntness.

      Taehyung and Seokjin seem shocked as well. Both their faces are blazing red.

      “Yeah, kinda,” Seokjin says, recovering first. He finally takes a seat on the bed, although he’s barely any closer to Taehyung. “We made out for a week and then Tae wanted to know what it was like to give a blowjob, so… I let him. I’m his hyung, we’ve known each other for years, and it was a safe environment for him to try. I figured, why not? I wanted to be a good hyung for my dongsaeng. I wanted him to feel like he could come to me for anything and I wouldn’t judge him.”

      “And this blowjob practice session has been going on for weeks now?” Namjoon asks.

      Taehyung and Seokjin exchange glances, then look back at Namjoon with sheepish grins. Seokjin shrugs. “Practice makes perfect.”

      “Oh my god,” Namjoon says, shaking his head. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. Does anyone else know?”

      Taehyung and Seokjin look at each other again. Namjoon doesn’t like where he thinks this is headed. Before they can say anything, Namjoon tells them, “All right, then. Things are more complicated than I realized. Should we call a group meeting?” He looks between the two of them, studying their hesitant faces. “Look, I know what you’re doing is private and… I’m sorry for just interrupting you in your room like that, but we have to think about the others. How this might affect them and our work as a whole. We need to be on the same page about things. The longer we hide this from each other the more jarring it will be when it finally comes out. And you don’t have to be scared. We all love you. If this makes you happy, then I’m sure everyone else will be happy too.”

      “You make it sound like we’re dating…” Seokjin mumbles.

      Namjoon frowns. “You’re not?”

      Taehyung laughs. “Someone’s a hopeless romantic.” Namjoon fights down a blush, wants to point out that it’s the pot calling the kettle black, but holds his tongue. “We’re just relieving each other of our urges. It’s working out pretty well. You should try it. Maybe with Yoongi hyung?” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

      Namjoon can’t hold back his blush anymore. “For fuck’s sake… I’ll call a meeting, if that’s okay with you two. Doesn’t have to be tonight, we’ve had a long day, but it should be soon. I can give you two more time to discuss it with each other—”

      “Oh my god,” Seokjin interrupts. “We don’t need to talk about it. We’re not a couple. We knew this would come out eventually and, yeah, you’re probably right that this meeting needs to happen. I don’t have any objections.”

      Namjoon looked at Taehyung. “Tae?”

      Taehyung nods his head. “I’m cool with it. We kept it secret because we were worried you guys would freak out, but you have a point, Joon. I trust them not to overreact. Should’ve realized that earlier.” He scrunches up his nose. “Well, maybe Jimin will. I tell him practically everything, but I’ve managed to keep this from him. It’ll be a relief to finally admit it, I guess.”

      Namjoon slaps his thighs and pushed himself up from his chair. “Okay. I’ll get everyone together. We’ll meet in the kitchen in ten.”

They all sit at or stand around the island. Jimin and Taehyung are sitting next to each other, somehow still possessing enough energy to mess around. Jungkook is looking around at everyone, as if trying to figure out what the hell is going on. Seokjin is standing at the opposite end of the island as Taehyung, examining his nails and very obviously trying not to look nervous. Hoseok is quieter than usual, looks exhausted. Namjoon feels guilty for bothering him when the man so clearly needed rest and, frankly, he was kind of scared to get him for the meeting. Hoseok’s happy-go-lucky meter tends to drop to empty toward the end of the day. Yoongi is much the same. He shot Namjoon a death glare as soon as he sat down at the island, appearing every bit like a bear woken up right in the middle of hibernation. He’d thrown one of his hats on to hide his messy bed hair.

      Namjoon stands at the head of the island, wondering if maybe he should have waited to call this meeting. Then he mentally shakes himself. No, he’s already called the meeting. This is serious. He knows the longer he pushes it off, the more reluctant he—and Seokjin and Taehyung—will be to talk about it. It’s now or, quite possibly, never.

      Before Namjoon can say anything, Yoongi sighs loudly. “If we don’t start this meeting, I’m gonna have to kill someone.”

      What a way to start this off. Namjoon clears his throat, folding his hands together on the counter. He quickly realizes how weirdly formal this looks when everyone’s eyes follow his movements, so he opts for placing them behind his back instead. “Uh, I know this is sudden—”

      “Fuck yeah it is,” Yoongi mumbles in irritation.

      Namjoon ignores him and continues, “But we needed to talk about a… recent development.” He motions to Taehyung and Seokjin awkwardly. God, this is so awkward. He didn’t realize how awkward this would be. “Um, so…”

      Taehyung suddenly pulls his hands back from Jimin and huffs, as if this whole thing is a chore. “Joon caught me giving Jin hyung a blowie. There, that’s out there now.”

      “What?” Jimin practically screeches, tearing his fingers from Taehyung’s hair.

      Hoseok’s face scrunches into his typical disgusted expression, but he seems to realize quickly what he looks like and discards it. “A ‘blowie’? Please tell me you mean a Blow Pop.”

      “Nope,” Seokjin answers, his face turning pink. “He means blowjob.”

      “What?”

      Taehyung bats Jimin away from him, blushing hard. “Calm down, Jiminie, jeez.”

      “Calm down?” Jimin balks. “You’re telling me to calm down when you didn’t bother to tell me that any of this was going on?”

      “That’s what you’re worried about?” Yoongi says, visibly more interested in the meeting now. “Not the fact that Tae just admitted to sucking Jin hyung off?”

      Seokjin winces. “Yoongi, please.”

      Yoongi frowns at him. “What? That’s what happened, right?” He swings his head around to look at Namjoon. “You walked in on Tae with Jin’s dick in his mouth?”

      Namjoon squeezes his eyes shut and covers his face with his hands. “Oh my god, this is so weird.” He takes a deep breath and answers, “No, not exactly—”

      “I kinda pulled off him just before he came in,” Taehyung clarifies. Jimin gapes at him. “Good thing, too. Joon looked close to passing out as it was.” He laughs awkwardly.

      “And you thought it was okay to keep this from us?” Hoseok asks. He looks less tired now. More… kind of pissed. Not good. “Do you have any idea what would happen if PD Nim or any of the other management caught you? Or the noonas? You know how they gossip.”

      “No, no, no,” Seokjin replies, gesturing wildly. “We never, never do it outside of our rooms.”

      “Yeah, but Namjoon walked in and caught you,” Hoseok points out.

      Seokjin rubs at the back of his neck. “Yeah… that was a fluke.”

      “A fluke?” Hoseok squawks, indignant. 

      “I didn’t know you were gay,” Jimin interrupts, and Namjoon is grateful that he stops Hoseok from raising his voice any further. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Jimin looks genuinely hurt.

      “Because I’m not gay,” Taehyung says. A guilty expression falls over his face.

      Yoongi raises an eyebrow. “Bi, then?”

      “Well…” Taehyung trails off. “It’s… complicated. I mean, I do like women still. I’ve just,” he shrugs, “sucked a dick.”

      “Ah,” Yoongi bobs his head. “Having an identity crisis? Don’t worry. You’ll figure it out.”

      “You sound like you speak from experience,” Jimin says jokingly. “Sucked some dick yourself?”

      Namjoon winces. This was not how he planned this meeting to go. Time to redirect. “Guys, could we—?”

      “Yeah, so what?” Yoongi talks over him and suddenly everyone’s eyes are on him. Yoongi looks taken aback. “What? You guys didn’t know?”

      “Didn’t know that you’re gay?” Jimin says, shocked. “No. It’s not like you told us!”

      Yoongi rolls his eyes. “I’m not gay. I like women, men, been with a girl who had a dick before. So, I guess not bi, more like… pan? I’m not a fan of labels.”

      Hoseok’s mouth is hanging open. “A girl with a dick?”

      “What? Yeah, they exist, you know.”

      “No, I mean,” Hoseok says, “didn’t know you’d be into that.”

      “The topic of my sexuality never came up. Besides, I thought I made it pretty clear that I wasn’t straight,” Yoongi says. His face is a bit pink now, despite his outward confidence.

      “Since when?” Namjoon can’t help but ask.

      “Since Cypher 3,” Yoongi scoffs, looking at Namjoon like he’s dumb. “Do you think I just threw that ‘whether it’s a guy or girl, I’ll make you come’ verse in there on a whim?”

      Namjoon ran the words through his head again, feeling his face grow suddenly hot. “Oh, well… guess I never thought of it that way. Saw it as a really good diss. Never really thought more of it.”

      Yoongi rolls his eyes again. “I always mean what I rap. You out of everyone should know that.”

      “Oh,” Namjoon says, feeling a bit guilty. He’d known Yoongi for longer than most of the others in the group. How had he not noticed? What kind of friend was he? “Sorry.”

      Yoongi shrugs. “It’s whatever. I had my suspicions that you might not know, since it took you so long to figure out that Tae and Jin were fooling around.”

      Namjoon stiffens. “What do you mean? You knew?”

      Yoongi tilts his head and shrugs in a ‘yeah, no big deal’ gesture. Hoseok’s frown returns. “So, you found out, then you thought it best to keep it a secret?” Hoseok asks, peeved. “Isn’t that a bit irresponsible considering, well, it could have ended the group?”

      Yoongi sighs. He doesn’t look like Hoseok’s tone of voice intimidates him, but Namjoon can tell he’s a bit uncomfortable. “It wasn’t my place to say. Not my choice. If they weren’t comfortable being ‘out’, then I wouldn’t say anything.”

      A wave of guilt washes over Namjoon anew. He tosses both Seokjin and Taehyung apologetic glances. “I’m sorry. I-I didn’t know. Should have let you guys do it on your own terms. I wasn’t thinking…”

      Taehying put his hands up. “No, really, it’s okay. I gave you the go ahead, so it’s fine. But I think it would make me more comfortable knowing where everyone else was on this…”

      “On what?” Hoseok asks.

      “On, uh…”

      “Sexuality?” Yoongi supplies.

      “Yeah,” Taehyung perks up. “Uh, yeah, that. I-if you’re all willing. If not…”

      “I’ll start,” Jimin says, sitting back in his chair. “I’m gay. Very gay. Never been with a girl and never want to.”

      No one reacts.

      Jimin frowns at them. “What? Did you guys know?”

      “Kinda,” Taehyung answers. “I mean, in clubs you do tend to grind up on the guys more than the girls…”

      “And one time I found your secret porn mag stash,” Hoseok says. Jimin fixes him with a horrified look. “Not on purpose! I was just cleaning the room and found it.”

      Jimin’s face goes entirely red then and he drops his face into his hand. “God, kill me now.”

      “I didn’t get a very good look at it!” Hoseok insists.

      “Because you’re not into men?” Yoongi asks, then says to Jimin, “And who the hell still keeps a stash of porn mags? What are you, a fifty-year-old man?”

      Jimin snorts but doesn’t answer, and Hoseok goes quiet for a moment, squinting at nothing. “Hm, not really. Never been with a guy. Never really found them attractive. Except… well…”

      “Well?” Yoongi prompts, leaning in.

      Hoseok noticeably swallows, his eyes dropping to the countertop. “Maybe I find you all attractive every now and then. You know, like in a friendly way. Like, I acknowledge that you’re handsome or sexy in some of our videos and photoshoots.”

      Everyone is quiet for a moment.

      Yoongi pushes his tongue against the side of his cheek to hide his smirk. “Interesting.”

      Hoseok’s head snaps up to look at him. “Interesting?”

      “Yeah,” Yoongi goes on. “In my opinion, sexuality is a spectrum. A lot of gray area. Some guys have only ever been into girls, but I think in the right circumstances they could go gay. And it seems like we’re your circumstances.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

      Hoseok’s face pulls into his disgusted expression again. He makes a dismissive motion with his hand. “Oh, don’t flatter yourself. We’re idols. We’re supposed to be hot. What do you think the makeup noonas are for?”

      “Whatever you say, man,” Yoongi says, still smirking.

      Hoseok looks like he’s about to retort when Seokjin says, “About this spectrum…” He bites at his lip. “I think I’m in a gray area too. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I love women. All I’ve had are girlfriends. But then this thing with Tae made me realize… I’m not completely opposed to having sex with a guy. Maybe not anything beyond oral, definitely not anything romantic. But a mouth’s a mouth, you know?”

      Yoongi toasts Seokjin with his water bottle. “Damn straight… or rather, not.”

      “Aww yeah,” Taehyung cheers, fist-pumping. “I turned Jinie gay! Behold, the power of my oral skills!”

      Seokjin blushes deeper. “I said I’m in a gray area!”

      “Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Taehyung says with a dismissive flick of his hands, although his face is practically on fire from the praise. He shifts in his seat. “I’m the one that wanted to know what giving a blowjob felt like, so I guess I’m more into guys than I originally thought. All I’ve had are girlfriends too, but, like, in high school there was this one teacher…” Taehyung squirms a bit more, but, to his credit, doesn’t let his eyes roam. “Gym teacher, naturally. Gotta see a lot of him in shorts, tee-shirts. There was this one time when I was goofing off and not doing the exercises. He pulled me to the side and made me do twice as many exercises as everyone else. Watched me the whole time, scolded me a bit. When I finished, he ran his fingers through my hair and…”

      Namjoon narrows his eyes, fear and anger clenching at his belly. “He didn’t… did he?”

      Taehyung meets his eyes and shakes his head adamantly. “No, no. Nothing inappropriate. He just kind of patted my head and said, ‘good boy’ or something along those lines and, well, let’s just say I was very confused by my body that day, haha.”

      Yoongi snickers. “Uh oh, looks like someone has a praise kink.”

      “Praise kink?” Taehyung asks, tilting his head to the side.

      “Praise kink,” Yoongi explains. “You know, when a partner praises you and you pop a boner.”

      Taehyung blushes even harder. Namjoon didn’t think that was possible. Namjoon is also blushing a bit himself since he’s thinking about how he liked to praise his partners in bed, but no one needs to know that. This coincidence is just too weird. “I didn’t pop a boner! I mean, I got a half-chub at most, but… maybe it was also because it was an authority figure who said it? It’s always been older men I seem to react… like that to.”

      Yoongi’s smirk widens. “Ohoho, a daddy kink too, then.”

      Jimin snorts next to Taehyung, almost falling out of his chair laughing. Taehyung slaps him. “Shut up! Don’t kink-shame me!”

      Hoseok nods, hiding his laughs behind a hand. “Yeah, we gotta be supportive. It’s important that we support each other’s sexuality.”

      Jimin wipes the tears from his eyes. “Sorry.”

      “Is that why you chose Jin hyung to blow?” Yoongi asks. “‘Cause he’s your hyung?”

      Taehyung goes thoughtfully silent for a minute. “Well, it was just because we accidentally kissed one day, and I thought ‘might as well.’ But, I don’t know. Maybe it turned into that at some point.”

      Seokjin clears his throat and shifts from foot to foot. Yoongi flashes him a grin. “You into that, hyung?”

      Seokjin tries his best to look confident. “Uh, I’ve had girls call me ‘oppa.’ At first I thought it was weird, but then I kinda got into it. I think it happened when one of my hookups called me ‘daddy.’ There was a… response.”

      “Hmm, so there was already a mutual attraction, huh?” Jimin cuts in, smiling fiendishly. “Explains why you two decided to go with it after the accidental kiss.”

      Taehyung slaps him again and Jimin laughs.

      Namjoon nearly jumps out of his skin when Yoongi looks at him next. “Don’t think you’ll be left out of this. What about you?”

      “If you feel like sharing,” Hoseok adds insistently.

      Namjoon stares at them all, his mouth going dry. Then he decides, fuck it, everyone else is doing it. Why not set an example and go for it? So he shoves his hands into his pants pockets to hide the fact that they’re trembling and replies, “I’m kinda like Hobi. I like calling you guys cute and admiring how handsome you are sometimes, but other than that I’ve never been attracted to men. Although there was this time in high school when I thought maybe I was.”

      “Why’s that?” Yoongi asks and Namjoon thinks of course he would ask. Why did he even bring it up? Damn Yoongi.

      Namjoon tries to keep his shit together. He’s not one to go shy when it comes to sex talk, but it’s different when they’re all discussing it seriously. A bit… intimate. He fees vulnerable and he has to tell himself that it’s okay, that these are his friends. He can be vulnerable in front of them. They won’t judge.

      So he continues, “Well, the gay guy in my class kinda came onto me, asked me out.”

      Yoongi whistles low. “Good taste.”

      “Shut up,” Namjoon says, smiling at the compliment. “I got flustered, even though he asked in private, away from my friends. I didn’t know what to say. I’d never been asked out. Never even had a girlfriend at that point.”

      Taehyung frowns. “Wait, when exactly did you lose your virginity?”

      “Doesn’t matter,” Namjoon says quickly. “The fact was I was still unfamiliar with the whole… romantic love kinda thing. I ended up turning the guy down and he was cool about it, but it got me thinking… am I gay? So I went home and started watching gay porn—”

      “Wow, that escalated quickly,” Hoseok comments.

      Namjoon ignores him, pushes on through the story. He can’t stop now. “All sorts of gay porn. After a while of not responding to any of it, I concluded that I didn’t like guys.”

      “Fair enough,” Yoongi says, nodding. For some reason, he looks disappointed.

      They all go quiet again. Then Yoongi turns to Jungkook, who is fiddling with the hem of his shirt. “You’ve been weirdly quiet, Kookie. Do you have anything to say?”

      Jungkook jumps in his seat, as if he forgot where he was. He looks at them all, his cheeks pink. “Uh… well, I guess I should contribute. I mean, I want to contribute,” he adds when he sees Hoseok open his mouth. “I just feel a little… out of my depth. I’m kinda still a virgin.”

      “We know,” they all say at once.

      Jungkook smiles sheepishly. “But I should say that I’m open to anything, at this point. Not that I’m desperate or anything. I’m not one for hookups. I wanna wait until the right person comes along. Someone special.”

      “Aww,” Namjoon can’t help but say. “That’s cute.”

      “And you don’t have any reason to be ashamed of that,” Hoseok assures. “You know what you want and that’s a good thing.”

      “Thanks,” Jungkook says. He pauses, as if mulling something over. “U-um, as I said, I’m open to anything. I started out liking girls, probably because they always came onto me.”

      “Naturally,” Yoongi agrees.

      Jungkook blushes. “Yeah. But then some guys started coming onto me and I also liked that. It’s not about it being an attention thing either. I genuinely felt like maybe I’d consider being with a girl or a guy one day. I don’t know.”

      “Do you get off to the thought of guys?” Yoongi suddenly asks.

      Jimin leans in curiously while Hoseok hisses, “Yoongi hyung!”

      To his credit, Jungkook doesn’t seem embarrassed by the question. He thinks for a moment. “Yeah, I have. That came as a surprise as well. First it was wet dreams, then it sort of… escalated.”

      Seokjin lets out a little gasp, as if he can’t believe his little baby Jungkook has something as dirty as wet dreams. It’s weird for Namjoon to wrap his head around as well, but Jungkook is barely out of his teenage years. Wet dreams are not unusual for such a time. In fact, from Namjoon’s own experience, they’re extremely common. Kind of an every night thing. How does Jungkook deal with that much pent up sexual desire? Namjoon could barely control it himself and ended up jumping at the chance to fuck some random girl his senior year just to end the urges. It was not like he’d have gotten another chance anyway; exams were coming up, and he’d be damned if studying once again kept him from sex. Still, he was happy to see that Jungkook had more self-control than Namjoon did when he was his age.

      “Also,” Jungkook adds. “I knew about Tae hyung and Jin hyung as well. I didn’t tell anyone for the same reason Yoongi didn’t. I felt it wasn’t my place.”

      Taehyung’s eyes widen as he stares at Jungkook. “How did you and Yoongi know anyway? I could’ve sworn we were being discreet.”

      “I’ve been around enough fuck buddies to know when they’re fuck buddies,” Yoongi answers smoothly. “They spend more time alone together, make excuses to be by themselves.” He faces Seokjin. “I’ve caught you staring an unusually long time at Tae’s lips as well. Figured there was something going on between you two.”

      Seokjin blushes and stammers. Jungkook comes to his rescue. “I may be inexperienced with sex,” Jungkook says, “but I tend to notice emotional rather than physical changes. You guys aren’t a couple, but you look at each other as if you have some happy little secret you share.” He smiles at them. “It’s cute. And, well, I noticed you guys going off by yourselves a lot too. Once caught Tae hyung coming out of Jin hyung’s hotel room at five in the morning, looking like he slept there. I knew there was only one bed in there and, while a lot of us tend to sleep together sometimes, Tae looked…”

      “Sexed up?” Yoongi offers.

      Jungkook nods. “Yeah, kinda. I mean, his lips were all red and swollen. His hair was more messed up than usual, and he had a, uh…” He gestures to his neck.

      Everyone swings around to look at Taehyung.

      Taehyung bites his lip. “I told Jin to be careful. It’s his fault.”

      “Hey, don’t pin this all on me,” Jin says, pointing at him. “You’re the one who let me do it.”

      “I can only imagine the looks on the makeup noonas’ faces when they saw that you had a hickey,” Jimin laughs.

      “You really do have to be careful with those, though,” Hoseok says sternly. “We’re not supposed to have any visible marks. That and if it happens enough times, people may start wondering where they’re coming from and start looking into it.”

      “Yeah, and the fact that you were caught coming out of Jin hyung’s room with a hickey,” Namjoon adds, “that could have ended badly if it wasn’t Kookie that caught you.”

      “True,” Taehyung admits, rubbing his neck. As if he’s trying to make sure there isn’t another hickey there right now. He groans. “It’s so frustrating sometimes, you know? Having to constantly tiptoe around when it comes to sex.” More quietly, he adds, “I like getting hickeys.”

      The way Taehyung whines the last part causes a weird twinge in Namjoon’s groin. To his left, he sees Seokjin’s hands come down to clasp together over his crotch and Yoongi wet his lips a couple of times. What the fuck was that just now?

      “I have an idea,” Yoongi says suddenly.

      “What is it?” Taehyung prompts, genuinely interested.

      Yoongi licks his lips again. He’s nervous, Namjoon can tell. But about what? He’s been mostly all bravado throughout this entire meeting. What could possibly have him so nervous now?

      “Look,” Yoongi begins, his voice possessing a weirdly cautious note. Like he’s slowly feeling his way forward, closely reading their reactions. “I miss just having sex without the added pressure of being discreet. Sometimes it’s a turn-on, but for the most part it’s pain in the ass.” He pauses, licks his lips again.

      Namjoon finds himself looking at Yoongi’s lips and comes to his senses. “Yeah? So, what’s your point?”

      “My point is,” Yoongi begins slowly, eyes darting around to them all, “that we all take a huge risk whenever we go out and pick up other people. And one day, whether that be tomorrow or years from now, we can’t be sure, one of our partners is gonna go to the media or we’re gonna get caught in a compromising position by, for lack of a better word, an outsider.”

      Hoseok sits back in his chair, nodding a bit. “Yeah, I’ve thought about that a lot. Sometimes too much. To be honest, it’s really kind of killed my sex life. Lately I’m so afraid of the bad publicity that I’ve mostly just been staying at home.”

      “Um,” Jimin mutters, then goes silent again. He peers up to see all eyes on him and looks startled, as if he didn’t mean the sound to slip out. He sighs. “Uh, um, yeah, I can understand that. Please don’t freak out,” he says to Hoseok, “but last year I kinda got into a bit of a… situation regarding something like that.”

      Hoseok’s eyes widen, but he says nothing. Just waits for Jimin to continue.

      “So, it was during our tour in Brazil,” Jimin continues, pointedly not looking at them. “I was out clubbing with Hobi and Tae. Dancing, drinking, y’know? Kinda drank too much, to be honest. Maybe that was why when this guy started coming onto me super strong, I wasn’t suspicious. I mean, he was hot as all fuck. One of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen. The moment he started grinding up on me, I was thinking with my dick.”

      “Been there,” Yoongi admits.

      “Yeah,” Jimin says, happy that he has an ally. “We were at the end of our tour and I was super horny. Hadn’t fucked since—”

      “Since a few months back when we were in Japan,” Taehyung fills in. “I remember seeing you go off with another guy in Okinawa.”

      Jimin blushes. “Jeez, wasn’t aware I was that obvious. Um, so, I was thinking with my dick and I was drunk and… kinda desperate. Stupidly desperate. I don’t know why. Maybe ‘cause the guy was hot, maybe ‘cause I’d been celibate for a while, maybe the atmosphere of the club… I don’t know. But whatever happened, I can’t recall, because one minute I’m grinding up against this guy on the dance floor and the next I’m shoved up against a stall in the bathroom…”

      Namjoon feels anger work its way through his veins. His fists clench in his pockets. “He took advantage of you,” he says, his voice low.

      Jimin quickly shakes his head. “No, no, nothing like that. I mean, when I came to I wanted it. I participated. It was consensual. I mean, at least it was until I noticed that he’d taken his phone out—”

      “Oh no,” Hoseok breathes.

      “—and was recording us. Like, I should have noticed it sooner, really. But I was buzzed and he was so sneaky about it. Like, if I hadn’t craned my neck just right at just the right time, I may never have seen it.”

      “What did you do?” Seokjin presses.

      “I freaked the fuck out, naturally,” Jimin continues. “Here I was fucking some rando in a dirty club bathroom, straddled over the toilet, pants around my ankles, and he’d gotten it on video. This could ruin me, ruin us. I saw… the end of BTS then, and it would be all my fault. Because I was so damn stupid.” Jimin inhales shakily, his eyes moistening.

      Taehyung wraps an arm around him. “It wasn’t your fault, Jiminie,” he assures. “Dude seemed determined to get you into a compromising position from the start. He manipulated you.”

      “And I let him manipulate me,” Jimin mutters quietly and when Namjoon opens his mouth to protest, Jimin says more loudly, “Don’t. Just… don’t, okay? At least part of it’s my fault, and I accept that. Anyway,” Jimin runs a hand through his hair, sniffling. “I tried to grab the phone out of his hand, but he held it away from me. Told me that it was too late. He had me on video and he was going to publish it on the internet. It would be everywhere. Everyone would know how much of a slut I was to have sex in a club bathroom.” He hiccupped and wiped at his eyes. Taehyung gets up to stand behind him, wraps his arms around him, puts his chin on his shoulder, murmurs something that Namjoon thinks is comforting. Jimin takes a deep breath. “He demanded I give him money or else he would post it. I said, sure, yeah, anything. What did he want? A lot of money, that’s what. Like, half my earnings for the year. But I promised it to him because what else could I do?”

      “That’s why you were so jumpy after Brazil,” Jungkook says quietly. “Oh, Jimin…”

      “So, I gave him what he wanted. I gave him the money. Had to tell PD Nim and the rest of management. God, it was so embarrassing.” Jimin laughs shakily. “But for the most part they were sympathetic. Asked the guy to meet up in private some place so they could check his phone in exchange for the money, make sure the video was gone. He did delete it, but there was still the possibility that he could have put it online somewhere. So, management did a months-long sweep of a bunch of porn sites to make sure the video wasn’t there. And it hasn’t shown up. So far. I guess it also helps that we threatened to sue the guy if the video ever got out. At least there’s that.”

      “I’m so sorry that happened to you, Jimin,” Seokjin says. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

      “Because I didn’t want to worry you guys,” Jimin answers, wiping at his eyes. “I also wasn’t ready to… come out yet. Which is stupid, I know, because apparently everyone seemed to know I was gay already…”

      “It’s not stupid,” Yoongi says. He sounds casual, but there’s an underlying fatherly tone in his voice. “It was your choice. If you weren’t ready, then you weren’t ready.”

      “Thanks,” Jimin croaks.

      Silence stretches on for a moment between them, only filled with Jimin’s sniffles and Taehyung’s quiet murmuring. Namjoon remembers where this conversation was going earlier and turns to Yoongi, who looks lost in thought. “Um, you were talking about your idea?”

      “Oh yes,” Yoongi says, snapping out of it. “Well, considering what happened with Jimin—which was not your fault, I don’t care what you say—we can conclude that having sex with people outside the group is extremely risky.”

      “‘Outside the group’?” Hoseok echoes. “You talk as if we have sex with each other on the regular.”

      Yoongi bites his lip, a gesture Namjoon knows he only makes when he’s unsure about something. “Yeah, that’s my point.”

      Seokjin frowns. “Your point?”

      “My point,” Yoongi takes a deep breath, “is that… maybe you and Tae have the right idea.”

      “What? Me blowing him?” Taehyung says and Namjoon puts his head in his hands again. He’d almost forgotten that this meeting was about that.

      “Kind of,” Yoongi says. “I mean, you got caught by Kookie, but even if you were caught by someone outside just us then with a good excuse you could wiggle out of it. Doesn’t pose as much a risk as taking a stranger home.”

      “We could just not have sex,” Hoseok suggests, then immediately frowns as if he dislikes his own idea.

      They all give a collective groan, everyone except Jungkook who just stares at them blankly. “No, no, I had enough of that during the years before and just after we debuted,” Yoongi complains. “Never again. I thought my dick had shriveled up. Besides, we know from experience that holding off on sex makes us desperate, and being desperate makes us take risks, yeah?”

      Jimin lowers his head, squirming in his seat. “Yeah…”

      “Yeah,” Yoongi goes on. “So I’m suggesting—”

      Namjoon suddenly catches on, tries to stop Yoongi in his tracks, even though he knows that would be impossible. If Yoongi had his mind set on something, there was no changing it. “No, no, you’re not suggesting—”

      “—that we have sex with each other instead,” Yoongi finishes. Although he’s a bit pink in the face, he flashes Namjoon a smirk. Little shit is reveling in the fact that Namjoon couldn’t stop him from saying it.

      Everyone goes quiet for what feels like a full minute. Then Taehyung lets out a loud laugh. Jimin soon joins in, leaning all over Taehyung, almost falling out of his chair. When all Yoongi does is stare at them with a straight face, Taehyung stops laughing and says, “Oh wait. You’re serious?”

      “Uh, yeah, I’m serious,” Yoongi says, as if it’s obvious.

      “You’re serious…” Hoseok mutters.

      Yoongi rolls his eyes, a blush working its way across his face. “For fuck’s sake. I meant what I said. It’ll be easier and safer if we all just fuck each other.”

      Namjoon’s heart picks up speed after hearing the word ‘fuck.’ Like the word really emphasized exactly what Yoongi was suggesting they all do. It seems to snap everyone else out of their trances as well. Seokjin starts chanting a string of ‘wait, wait, wait’s while Jungkook sputters and Hoseok starts downing water from his bottle like crazy.

      “Look,” Yoongi says loudly, talking over them. Seokjin glares at him, but he continues regardless. “I know it’s weird—”

      “Oh, it’s weird as fuck,” Namjoon agrees, still in shock.

      “It’s weird,” Yoongi concedes. “But just think about it. Who do we trust more than each other? Who do we spend the most time with? Who would get suspicious if we spent time alone with each other? We do that all the damn time. We live in the same apartment complex. We work on music with each other. It’s a safe bet.”

      “What about the fact that some of us just told you that we’re not into men?” Hoseok asks, finishing his water. “Is that just… some arbitrary thing to you?”

      “No, but I stand by my spectrum theory,” Yoongi says.

      Hoseok frowns at him. “So, you think that we’re gonna go gay for each other just because it’s convenient?”

      “Why not?” Yoongi asks innocently, pouting.

      Namjoon stares at him, a realization forming in his mind. “This is some fantasy for you, isn’t it?” he accuses. “You’re trying to get us to indulge your perversions.”

      Yoongi’s blush gets darker, but he leans back in his chair and shrugs nonchalantly, like this whole thing doesn’t bother him. “So what if I am?”

      Jimin barks out a laugh. “Oh my fucking god, Yoongi hyung. You thirsty bitch.”

      Yoongi scoffs. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

      “So you admit you’re attracted to us?” Taehyung asks, raising an eyebrow. He looks way too pleased with himself.

      Yoongi shrugs. “I know you’re all talented in your own ways, but please. Did you really think Big Hit didn’t consider our looks when they chose us? I will readily admit that you’re all hot. I mean, you’re supposed to be.”

      Hoseok frowns. “I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or…”

      “Trust me,” Yoongi assures. “It’s a compliment.”

      “That still doesn’t change the fact that some of us aren’t into guys, though.”

      Yoongi sighs wearily, as if he’s trying to explain a complex concept to a child “You don’t have to be into guys. You just have to be into us.”

      Hoseok stares at him, his face scrunching up. “Is there something I’m missing here or…?”

      “Look, sexuality is a complicated thing. As I said, I don’t like labels. So what if you let a guy suck your dick?” Yoongi motions to Seokjin, who appears uncomfortable at being brought into the conversation. “Doesn’t mean you want to be romantically involved with a guy. A mouth is a mouth. You said so yourself.”

      “Hey, don’t use my own words against me!” Seokjin snaps, a blush creeping across his cheeks.

      “This is happening right now,” Namjoon says to himself. “This is actually happening. What the fuck?”

      “Hey, man, you’re the one who called this meeting,” Yoongi says.

      “Yeah, about Tae and Jin!” Namjoon flashes back.

      “This is about Tae and Jin.”

      “Really? ‘Cause it sounds like a cliché porn ad to me!”

      “Hey, don’t you hate on my cliché porn ad impressions!”

      “I could give it a shot.”

      Namjoon and Yoongi tear their eyes from each other to look at Taehyung. He’s standing behind Jimin, a contemplative look on his face. “I mean,” Taehyung continues, “I like blowing Jin hyung. Who’s to say I won’t like blowing the rest of you guys?”

      Namjoon can’t believe what he’s hearing. I should have saved this for tomorrow. We’re all so tired we’re talking nonsense.

      Yoongi has a wide, satisfied smile on his face. “That’s the spirit!”

      “It’s gonna be really weird,” Jimin says. “I mean, you guys are hot. But you’re my friends. I would never consider dating you.”

      Yoongi presses a hand to his heart. “You wound me, Jiminie.”

      “It’ll be less awkward for you, at least,” Seokjin says. “You’re gay.”

      Jimin folds his arms over his chest. “Just because I’m gay doesn’t mean fucking my best friends won’t be awkward. None of you are my type.”

      “Ouch,” Taehyung says, wincing. “I thought we got along pretty well.”

      “Yeah, as friends,” Jimin emphasizes.

      Taehyung pouts at him for a moment before he pounces on Jimin, hands going for his crotch. Jimin almost falls out of his seat, tries to extricate himself from him. “What the hell are you doing?”

      “Let me suck your dick!” Taehyung begs.

      “What?!”

      “Just let me do it. Come on! I’m good. You’ll like it!”

      “No! Get off me!”

      Yoongi chuckles next to Namjoon. “You’re loving this, aren’t you?” Namjoon deadpans.

      Yoongi smirks at him. “You have no idea.”

      “Wait, wait,” Jungkook suddenly cuts in and they haven’t heard his voice in so long they all stop to look at him. “Yoongi hyung has a point. Everything would be much more discreet if we… you know, did it with each other.”

      “‘Did it’?” Jimin says, smiling. “You’re so cute, Kookie.” Jungkook blushes while Taehyung is distracted enough for Jimin to finally push him away. “Are you saying you would do it? What happened to wanting to wait?”

      “I’d feel comfortable if it’s with you guys,” Jungkook says. “I trust you and I love you. Besides, um, I’m kinda… insecure about being so inexperienced, so maybe this’ll be good practice?”

      It was so strange to hear Jungkook, of all people, agree to something so sexual. Namjoon thought Jungkook would be the least comfortable with this situation, but, for some reason, he’d gained some confidence. Maybe it was because he’d done really well at dance practice today, so well that the choreographers praised him. Maybe it was because he looked the most well rested this morning. Namjoon can’t be sure. It catches him off-guard and, strangely, puts him a bit at ease. He’d been worried that Jungkook would react badly to this, that this might scar him. Hearing that he is somewhat comfortable with Yoongi’s idea makes muscles Namjoon hadn’t known were tense, relax. 

      The others seem to be feeling the same way. Namjoon can practically hear a collective exhale of breath. Then, Jimin concedes, “Fine. If Kookie’s in, I’m in. Could be fun.”

      “Aw yeah, then I’m in too,” Taehyung adds.

      Hoseok shakes his head. “I have to admit, this is the safest option. And I don’t want anything like what happened to Jimin to happen again. This is just… gonna be weird.”

      “I guess I’m already roped into this seeing as me and Tae have done things,” Seokjin sighs. “But, mostly, I’ll agree to it to make sure none of you go overboard.”

      Everyone is agreeing. Namjoon wasn’t expecting that. He doesn’t have an answer prepared, so when Yoongi gives him a questioning look, he stammers a bit. “U-uh, well. As Kookie said, we trust each other, right? Our friendship has weathered so much shit already. I think it can survive this. We can try it and if we don’t like it then we don’t have to do it again. You can drop out any time you want, no hard feelings. No pressure.”

      “Is that a yes?” Yoongi prompts.

      Namjoon sighs. What is he getting himself into? “Yeah. But don’t let it go to your head.”

      Yoongi’s eyes flash mischievously. Before Namjoon can warn him further, Taehyung pipes up, “So… how are we gonna do this, exactly? Just go off into rooms with each other in private like me and Jin have been doing, or…?”

      “Hm, that’s no fun,” Yoongi pouts, resting his chin on his hand. “I was thinking orgy.”

      Hoseok almost spits out the water he’s drinking. He swallows quickly, coughs a bit. “O-orgy?”     

      “Yeah, why not?” Yoongi says. “I mean, we all just agreed to have sex with each other. What better way of getting to know each other sexually than getting all together at once? That way we can see who has chemistry.”

      “Stop talking like you’re a matchmaker,” Seokjin says. “This is just sex.”

      “Chemistry doesn’t have to be emotional. Sexual chemistry is also very important,” Yoongi points out matter-of-factly.

      Taehyung bows dramatically. “Oh, great Yoongi hyung, master of sex, teach me your ways.”

      Around the island the others either roll their eyes or groan while Yoongi raises a hand. “I will impart my wisdom on you in due time, my son,” he intones.

      “So,” Hoseok interrupts and pauses like he can’t believe what he’s saying. “We’re having an orgy. When, though?”

      Namjoon goes over their weekly schedule in his head. He has up to three months memorized by now, every activity, all the times, the places they need to be. He didn’t let himself contemplate long enough to linger on the fact that he was trying to find free time for all of them to have sex together what the fuck. “Next Wednesday evening. We don’t have to be up early and we have no work to do at that time. We’ll have a good few hours.”

      “Sounds good.” Yoongi nods. He pushes back from his chair and stretches, yawning, looking extremely pleased with himself. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go pass out until morning.”

      “Same,” Hoseok says, yawning himself.

      “All right then,” Namjoon tells them. “Meeting adjourned. And Jin hyung, Tae?” Both men stop in their tracks on their way to their rooms, looking back at him. “No more hickeys. Please.”

The rest of the week is a blur of dance practice, interviews, more dance practice, photoshoots, voice coaching, recording, and yet more dance practice. So, when Namjoon walks through the lounge area on his way to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water and hears soft moaning, he wonders how in the fuck Taehyung and Seokjin have enough energy to get each other off.

      Namjoon doesn’t even bother to observe them as he opens a cabinet. “Guys, come on. Tomorrow’s the day. Couldn’t you have waited until then? Also, gross. We all sit on that couch, have some shame.”

      There’s the sound of something knocking against the coffee table and a mumbled curse. Namjoon stops in his tracks and turns on the lounge light. “Guys? You okay?” Jungkook’s head pops over the top of the couch, his face flaming red. Namjoon’s eyes widen. “Kookie? Were you just…?”

      They just stare at each other for a few long, tense moments. Then Jungkook’s face disappears behind the couch cushions. “Uh…” he says hesitantly. “I was, um, I… shit, okay, fine. I was… you know.”

      “Getting off?” Namjoon supplies, dumbfounded.

      “Yeah.”

      “On the couch,” Namjoon deadpans.

      A pause.

      Namjoon realizes then that he’s being kind of judgmental, that as the youngest and most sexually inexperienced member of the group, Jungkook could be ashamed of his own sexuality if he’s too hard on him. Then again, this is their couch. And while Namjoon isn’t foolish enough to think that no one had ever jerked off on it before, he’d rather they do it discreetly when no one else is around. And clean up after themselves. Maybe put down a towel. Had Jungkook even put down a towel? No, no. Don’t be critical. Be firm, but supportive. Yeah.

      But Namjoon had never had to scold a member for masturbating in the lounge before. He isn’t prepared for this.

      “I’m sorry,” Jungkook sighs, sitting up so he can see Namjoon. “I didn’t mean for you to walk in. Thought everyone had turned in for the night.”

      “It’s okay,” Namjoon says, filling his glass. “Honestly, I’m surprised I haven’t caught you jerking off any other time.”

      Jungkook laughs awkwardly. “Yeah, that’s because I usually do it in my room.”

      “Why the change today?”

      Another pause.

      “Um,” Namjoon says, reconsidering. “Never mind. You don’t have to tell me.”

      “No, no, it’s okay. I, uh. I was watching TV and the urge just hit me. Did a twice-around the complex to make sure everyone was in their rooms and all was quiet before, uh… starting.”

      “Did you finish?”

      Namjoon doesn’t know why he asked. Was it curiosity? Just making conversation? Was a part of him—just a tiny, miniscule part of him—turned on by the thought? Before Namjoon can explore that latter reason further, Jungkook replies, “Um… no.”

      “Uh…” Namjoon doesn’t know how to process this information, what to say next. Eventually, he downs the rest of his water as quickly as possible, puts his glass in the sink. “Well, uh. I’ll just go back to my room then. Just make sure to… clean up after yourself.”

      Namjoon passes by the couch rather fast, keeping his eyes forward. He hears Jungkook make a strange sound—a strangled sort of noise, sort of like a whine. It quickly turns into a hurried, “Okay, um, sorry about that.”

      Namjoon gives him a backhanded wave as he retreats. Is Jungkook really going to finish on the couch? The one that everyone shares? And Jungkook must not have been checking the complex very well, since Namjoon knew he had his door cracked open with the light on before he went to get water. If Jungkook passed by, they would have seen each other. If Jungkook is this negligent when it comes to hiding his masturbation sessions, then maybe it would be a good thing if they had sex with just each other. Well, maybe good for Jungkook, at least. For Namjoon, he still hasn’t been able to quite wrap his head around it.

      Great. Now every time I even look at that couch I’m gonna know that Kookie jerked off on it.