Chapter Text
Ichino’s Writer (and Aoyama’s Reader) Corner
Ichino : @everyone
Ichino : I have a question
Hamano : yep?
Ichino : Imagine you can get one info about your death between when, where and how
Ichino : Knowing you can’t fight against it
Ichino : What you get is the absolute truth and you can’t escape or slither your way out of the prophecy
Ichino : Which one would you choose?
Kirino : When
Aoyama : When
Hakuryuu : When
Kurama : when
Ichino : Why?
Manabe : Death is unavoidable and we shall accept it. However, passing away leaving no unfinished task is, in my opinion, the best way to leave.
Kurama : yeah
Kurama : i need to get my business done before kicking the bucket
Mahoro : I would loathe to leave the mortal plane with regrets.
Zanakurou : Akin to a wandering spirit, our souls would err, searching for a way to appease our woes.
Zanakurou : It is a play I wish not to partake in.
Kirino : There are things I need to tell before crossing this bridge and I need to know how long I have to say it
Konoha : i don’t want to leave with untold thoughts
Ichino : Good reasoning
Hakuryuu : Tsurugi and I agreed not to die before breaking our streak of draws
Hakuryuu : Until then, we are immortal
Hakuryuu : So if we know the day of our demise then we also know the day one of us will finally come out on top
Kurama : is your streak really that long?
Tsurugi : It’s like something we can’t avoid
Tsurugi : At this point we don’t care who will be the winner we just want it to end
Tsurugi : And no, faking defeat doesn’t work
Tsurugi : We tried and something happens every time
Hamano : like what?
Hakuryuu : We tried a fighting video game once
Tsurugi : In the middle of the battle Hakuryuu put down the controller to see if we could bullshit our way out of the streak
Hakuryuu : And the game crashed
Kurama : wtf
Tsurugi : Yeah
Tsurugi : Wtf
Hakuryuu : Another time we tried a simple run on a bridge
Hakuryuu : We had Tsurugi slooooowly walk through it, a step every few seconds
Tsurugi : And when Hakuryuu put his foot on it the bridge collapsed
Tsurugi : By the time he got on the other side the timer showed the same time as mine
Hakuryuu : So that’s why we want to know when
Hakuryuu : We need to be put out of our misery
Ichino :
Ichino : Ok
Ichino : The rest of you?
Aoi : I need to know how long I will be able to keep up before leaving you to fend for yourself.
Aoi : I’m worried about when that day will come.
Yukimura : oof
Midori : i was gonna say “how” but im joining aoi on this one
Midori : i wanna know whos going to stop living first between the team and me
Aoyama : Also
Aoyama : At least we know we can’t die before the time comes so we yolo our way through life until then
Ibuki : if I die next month that means i can fistfight everyone on the way there and only go after
Ibuki : im going to sock shindou and minamisawa straight in the face and die afterwards if needed
Ichino : I like that reasoning
Ichino : And assgshs Ibuki
Shindou : Whenever you want, Ibuki.
Minamisawa : We are waiting.
Sangoku : As long as I can see all my juniors graduate from high school, I will be satisfied.
Sangoku : I have to know if my wish will be fulfilled.
Amagi : you must see further sangoku
Amagi : we must be there for their wedding
Amagi : i will punch death if i have to live till then
Amagi : but i need to see hikaru grow
Amagi : AND I WILL BE THE ONE TO WALK HIM DOWN THE AISLE
Hikaru : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hikaru : o//////o
Hikaru : i’d love to have you walk me down the aisle amagi!
Ichino : Hell yeah
Ichino : That’s the best reason to live
Senguuji : My objective is to follow my father’s steps and to continue his legacy as an government officer. To achieve this goal, I need plenty of time.
Kishibe : I don’t know what I want to do yet, but succeeding Coach Aphrodi and watching over Kidokawa Seishu is maybe something I could do.
Kishibe : So I need to live long enough to become the best coach possible until I find my true calling!
Ichino : Nice
Miyabino : I’d say where.
Miyabino : I might not be able to fight against my fate but I can at least delay it by avoiding the place.
Tenma : i think id take where too
Kariya : but imagine you get a normal place
Kariya : like “youre going to die on a soccer field” or “youll be home when it happens”
Tenma : no! D:
Ibuki : the absolute horror
Shinsuke : but then ill have a reason to give my all at every match!
Shinsuke : so i wont have any regrets!
Aoyama : Basically Taiyou?
Yukimura : basically taiyou asgddfaa
Taiyou : i mean
Taiyou : not wrong
Kusaka : and if it happens at home then i just need to be careful
Kusaka : or to sleep with an eye open
Kusaka : or to trap my house if its a burglar
Matatagi : sounds stressful as fuck
Kusaka : yeah now that i think of it thats not a good idea
Kusaka : maybe how then
Kusaka : or when
Kusaka : actually idk
Ichino : Don’t worry
Minori : knowing myself ill kick the bucket throwing hands so i just want to know which turfs gonna be my grave
Minori : when ill be going there im bringing the stun gun and taking everyone with me
Kita : aqswgdf
Kita : going down like a warrior
Kita : metal af
Kita : i love that
Hamano : id like it if i could lady death could pick me up near some water
Hamano : itd be relaxing
Hamano : like a small date
Ichino : That’s kinda sweet
Kishibe : Lady Death? Does Death have a gender?
Senguuji : Does a concept have a gender?
Kurosaki : If Death is symbolised as a human entity, then it could possess one as well as not.
Manabe : Why wouldn’t Death possess multiple representations ? It is usually represented as a scythe, which is an inanimate object.
Sakura : but what if it was someone?
Minaho : Why not Lady Death and Mr Demise ?
Ibuki : theres still gender here
Zanakurou : Might we add a genderless familiar then ?
Miyabino : Any idea?
Zanakurou : A play I performed recently had Hell represented by a dog. Fell Dog maybe ?
Yukimura : fell dog asdgfd
Taiyou : i want fell dog to be the one to fetch me
Tenma : me too!
Kariya : imagine if fell dog looks like sasuke
Shinsuke : please dont say that
Tenma : well
Tenma : i know sasuke is going to go before me its not something i can forget or ignore
Tenma : but if he is fell dog then that means he will go back to fetch me!
Tenma : so i wont be going alone
Tenma : ill be with my friend that i havent seen for long and he will guide me to where i have to go
Tenma : so its not bad at all
Kariya : ok im crying
Kariya : i wasnt expecting that answer
Matatagi : i wasnt expecting emotional shit today
Konoha : i don’t think anyone one expected it
Namikawa : if im not dying on the sea i refuse to go
Namikawa : if i cant die on the sea im taking myself out on the spot
Nishiki : I DONT REALLY CARE WHERE BUT WHEN I DIE I WANT TO HAVE MY ASHES SPREAD AROUND THE KYOTO RYOZEN GOKOKU SHRINE
Ibuki : the what
Hayami : It’s a Shinto Shrine in Kyoto.
Hayami : Sakamoto Ryoma is buried there.
Hamano : oh thats why
Hakuryuu : Trespassing authorities to scatter the remains of a friend around?
Hakuryuu : You can count on me
Nishiki : THANKS
Ichino : You guys are so extra
Ichino : Awesome
Hyoudou : As long as it does not occur on a cliff or at high altitude.
Kita : fear of height?
Hyoudou : A possibility.
Kurumada : I JUST DONT WANT IT TO BE IN A TRAIN
Kurama : for?
Kurumada : REASONS
Kurama : ok
Hikaru : i want to know where
Miyabino : Why?
Hikaru : well
Hikaru : if i die close to raimon or teikoku or in a hospital then i can hope ill be surrounded by people i know
Hikaru : i dont really want to be alone when that time will come
Minamisawa : You first years need to stop making me cry. You are supposed to be happy-go-lucky kids.
Tsurugi : Sorry
Tsurugi : Kariya and I got in the way
Kariya : we destroyed the innocent first year quota
Amagi : HIKARU WELL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU
Amagi : THATS A PROMISE
Nishiki : HIKARU WE WONT LET YOU DIE SAD AND ALONE IN AN EMPTY ROOM
Sangoku : Know that we will rush to your side should anything happen to you.
Kariya : your going to die with us morons yelling in the background and thats a promise
Kurama : were not having it any other way
Hikaru : !!!!
Hikaru : thank you!
Ichino : And the “how” group?
Minaho : Keeping the time and the place of my demise builds some suspense I gladly appreciate. However, the circumstances of my disappearance…
Minaho : It is the peak of my existence ! It must live up to my expectations, lest I refuse my fate !
Akane : Exactly !~
Akane : How exciting would it be to become an unsolved case lacking evidence from decades !~
Sangoku : Are you alright? You’re scaring us.
Akane : By all means !~
Minaho : And in all fairness !
Sakura : i want to know if im going to get into a gymnastic accident
Sakura : i dont want to die falling after a headstand or slipping from the uneven bars
Sakura : thats ridiculous even for a non-gymnast so for a pro
Sakura : 😬
Yukimura : not wrong
Yukimura : if that happens to me with ice skating i want to know if its going to be ridiculous or if ill manage to die with panache
Yukimura : concussion from slipping like a noob is cringe so at least i demand a whiplash injury after a triple axel
Minamisawa : What is wrong with you all ?
Yukimura : have you seen us
Sakura : everything is wrong
Shindou : As much as my demand stems from my desire to trace back the causes, the place and the time, I just desire to die peacefully.
Shindou : A swift and painless death would be nice.
Kirino : A legitimate claim
Kirino : But your tiredness shows Shindou
Shindou : Does it ?
Kirino : Yes
Kirino : Next time you spend the night finishing a music sheet please go to sleep and don’t wake up until noon
Shindou : No promise.
Kirino : I will raid your house and put you to sleep myself
Shindou : By all means.
Kirino : I’ll get Raimon involved
Shindou : Maybe not that far.
Kirino : Try me
Sangoku : Try us.
Kita : i want to know if my death will be the consequence of my act
Kita : being collateral damage or caught in the crossfire is lame
Kita : at least let me plan my own death
Minamisawa : Will I die on my own or will I get involved in another one of your bullshitry ?
Minamisawa : I will live my life peacefully if the answer happens to be the former.
Tetsukado : id like to avoid getting into another accident involving an assault but at the same time if i die helping someone its worth it
Tetsukado : so how is not a bad thing
Ichino : You have your ways
Ichino : Not bad
Kurama : @Minamisawa
Kurama : have you seen us
Kurama : if somethings going to get us killed its raimon and no one else
Minamisawa : Let me hope. Let me dream.
Kurama : no
Taiyou : nurse fuyuka will kill me if i fall ill again
Taiyou : please tell me its not illness that will end me
Taiyou : everything but being at the end of nurse fuyukas wrath
Kurosaki : Sickness and diseases are also an ill I wish to avoid.
Tsurugi : Understandable
Tsurugi : Kurosaki more than Taiyou but understandable
Kariya : i have a list of questions regarding that and i need the answers
Kariya : am i going to die like a fool or will someone kill me for being a dick
Kariya : how spontaneous its going to be
Kariya : how much will it be on me
Matatagi : same
Matatagi : what have i done for those peeps to get rid of me
Matatagi : how many of them took part in the party
Matatagi : whos the one who will push me off the cliff
Matatagi : i need the info
Ichino : Incredible
Ichino : I dig this as some people say
Kishibe : I think the “how” category is not alright…
Taiyou : were perfectly fine wdym
Hayami : As much as I want to choose when or where, I know myself enough to know I will stress over the date or the place too much.
Hayami : So how is the less impactful choice for me.
Ichino : That’s fair
Kirino : And you, Ichino?
Ichino : How
Ichino : As Aoyama said: Yolo
Ichino : I want to know how I’ll get myself to be killed and how stupid it’ll be
Ichino : Will Faram Obius really come for me or will it be something else?
Kirino : Fair enough
Ichino : Wait
Ichino : No
Ichino : I’m taking when
Minaho : Why the sudden change ?
Ichino : I started writing a fanfic and Aoyama convinced me to post it online
Ichino : I don’t want to leave an unfinished WIP on eternal hiatus
Ichino : I need to finish it before I die
Ibuki : why can no one here expect to die of old age like normal people
Kirino : Have you seen us?
Kirino : I don’t think anyone from Raimon will get past 40
Kirino : The other team maybe but Raimon? Impossible
Miyabino : One or two people maybe?
Miyabino : Like maybe Aoi or Shindou?
Minori : aoi is probably going to die trying to stop us from doing shit
Kita : i can see Shindou downing a whole bottle of cyanide after losing his chill
Kirino : Next time we get into something bizarre and Shindou is involved in it, he takes a bottle of cyanide and drinks straight from the nozzle
Kirino : That’s how we lose Shindou
Matatagi : the one whos going to live the longest is probs tenma
Matatagi : cause hes
Matatagi : you know
Aoi : Unkillable ?
Matatagi : yeah
Aoyama : Until adulthood at least
Aoyama : We don’t know after that limit
Kurama : coach endou was unkillable when he was younger but as a coach he can die by sacrificing himself to save our asses
Hayami : So coach Tenma, if he ever is to become coach, could die.
Hayami : In this scenario, he would even be the first one to go.
Tenma : oh
Ichino : Thanks guys
Ichino : Saving it somewhere
Nishiki : NO PROB