Any and all Prep is Questionable at Best
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burn that bridge (when we fuck on it) by TheSoundEngineer
Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Fantastic Four
27 Apr 2025
Tags
Summary
“Ooooh, shiny,” Wade said, eyes widening with glee. He lunged forward, katanas at the ready. “Let’s see if it bleeds!”
“Deadpool, wait—” Spider-Man and Johnny shouted in unison, but it was too late. Deadpool’s blades sliced through the plant, and for a moment, everything was still. Then, with a deafening pop, the plant exploded, showering the trio in a cascade of sticky, pink goo.
“Oh, fantastic,” Johnny muttered, wiping the goo from his face.
Wade sucked in a breathed. “Smells like...cherry cola. And burning. And—” His eyes widened, a slow, mischievous grin spreading across his face. “Uh-oh.”
“Uh-oh?” Peter echoed, his spider-sense still buzzing. “‘Pool, what do you mean ‘uh-oh’?”
Before Deadpool could respond, Johnny groaned, pressing a hand to his forehead. “I feel... weird. I’m covered in goo and now I feel weird.”
“Oh no. Oh no, no, no.” Peter’s breath hitched as a strange warmth spread through his own body. “This is bad. This is very bad.”
—
or the one where Deadpool, Spider-Man and The Human Torch get covered in an alien goo. Goo that turns out to be sex goo.
Chaos abounds.
Series
- Part 1 of The Bridges AU
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All the Funny Edges by TheSoundEngineer
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
13 Jul 2025
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Summary
Peter’s having one of those days. The kind only Peter Parker could have—where everything that can go wrong, does. But sometimes, the universe throws him a bone. This time, that bone happens to be 6'5", mouthy, wrapped head-to-toe in red leather and kevlar with a Spider-Man obsession.
Lucky Peter. Maybe.
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Tags
Summary
“No,” he said flatly.
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Oh yes, Spicy Torch,” Wade grinned, sitting up like a mad preacher at the altar of filth. “Looks like to escape this we have to ‘summon the beast with two backs and a three-drink minimum’. Dock the starship in the forbidden harbor. You following me so far? The ceremonial pickle polishing. Engage in some high-level naked jenga, which is basically like regular jenga except the stakes are way higher and so is everyone’s blood pressure.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “Really, it’s a dealer’s choice, Hot Stuff.”
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or the one where Johnny and Wade get stuck in a magical sex box.Series
- Part 2 of The Bridges AU
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break that bridge (so we can fix it) by TheSoundEngineer
Fandoms: Fantastic Four, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
13 Oct 2025
Tags
Summary
Sequel to burn that bridge (when we f*ck on it).
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Wade bounced on the balls of his feet, box in gloved hands. “I have a surprise for you two,” he announced, grinning with his whole mask, eyes crinkling as he presented the artifact—a small cube, black as old pitch, its surface crawling with ancient, indecipherable symbols that glimmered faintly red.
Peter’s voice was wary, stretched thin. “‘Pool, what is that—”
Johnny, ever the faster draw, stepped back, instincts sharp. “What the fuck?” He eyed the box like it was about to explode.
Wade’s voice pitched up, sugar-sweet. “Surprise!” And then, with the enthusiasm of a child hurling a water balloon, he lobbed the box straight at them.
—
or the one Wade locks Peter and Johnny in a pocket dimension until come out in love because he literally cannot handle any more of Peter’s moping…
Series
- Part 3 of The Bridges AU