blueberrycrocodiles
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Summary
"Death"
"You are finally ready, I see"
"Ready for what?"
"To live"
"Wasn't I doing just that?"
"Were you?"Harry had no answer.
(Perhaps that was answer enough. Or perhaps Death just enjoyed being cryptic. Hard to say.)
___{Time-travel AU. Watch as Harry is yeeted into the past, bullies the wizarding world into making sense, and absolutely refuses to follow Dumbledore’s script. Features excessive worldbuilding (someone's gotta fix this mess), slow-burn romance (because trauma-bonding is hot), and a protagonist who treats destiny like Terms & Conditions—unread and promptly ignored. Happy ending optional, sarcasm mandatory.}
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 292,666
- Chapters:
- 19/?
- Collections:
- 23
- Comments:
- 2,511
- Kudos:
- 8,028
- Bookmarks:
- 3,313
- Hits:
- 236,793
Bookmarked by blueberrycrocodiles
24 Sep 2025
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Absolutely brilliant. One of my all time favorite fics. Hilarity ensues. You will cry laughing frequently. And tear up from feels occasionally. An absolute joy.
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Summary
In 1993, Gilderoy Lockhart points a stolen wand at Harry Potter and Ron Weasley with the intent to Obliviate them. The wand doesn't backfire. Gilderoy's "discovery" of the Chamber of Secrets is a short-term success.
Other consequences are not short-term at all.
Archived Author's Notes:
I was watching the Chamber of Secrets movie several years back when the scene in question began to play...and immediately I wanted to know what would happen if the wand had done what it was supposed to do. The answer got very complicated, very, *very* quickly.Blame Edgar Allan Poe for the title.
Beta work by Norcumi and Mrs_Stanley. Brit Spellcheck will be performed...soon.
*I use the first 7 books and the Tales of Beedle the Bard as canon, but there are moments from the films used because they left me with fun things to play with.
I do not consent to my work being reposted or used in any unofficial apps or other websites. This work is not posted for anyone's profit.
Series
- Part 1 of Swung by Serafim
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 352,375
- Chapters:
- 45/45
- Comments:
- 5,635
- Kudos:
- 12,111
- Bookmarks:
- 4,914
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- 493,936
Bookmarked by blueberrycrocodiles
16 Oct 2021
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Favorite Harry Potter
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Summary
A piece of Voldemort's soul attached to baby Harry Potter that fateful Halloween night. Over the years, the soul piece witnessed how much danger and pain his host was in. How far would the soul go to protect the child he began to care for, especially when the boy started to care for him in return? Oh, just a little over-protective care, some magic training, maybe some necromancy...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 228,691
- Chapters:
- 49/49
- Collections:
- 87
- Comments:
- 1,506
- Kudos:
- 15,839
- Bookmarks:
- 5,880
- Hits:
- 501,746
Bookmarked by blueberrycrocodiles
10 Oct 2024
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HP fave, creative and thorough plot and character development. Surprisingly fluffy. Excellent world building.
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Summer after the traumatic end of the Triwizard Tournament, instead of Harry Potter getting visions of the latest evil plot from the Dark Lord, it is Voldemort who gets visions of The-Boy-Who-Lived’s childhood.
And they’re not pleasant.
When Newt accepted to become one of Harry Potter's secret guard as a favor to Albus Dumbledore, he hadn't anticipated being faced with a choice concerning the welfare and safety of a child: obey Albus Dumbledore's orders or stay at Voldemort's side to protect Harry.
Though difficult, the right choice was clear.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 63,822
- Chapters:
- 18/?
- Comments:
- 1,946
- Kudos:
- 5,286
- Bookmarks:
- 1,947
- Hits:
- 100,263
Bookmarked by blueberrycrocodiles
04 Aug 2025
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Bookmarker's Notes
HP Faves, unique plot
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Holly Potter and the Midlife Crisis by Enigmaris
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
16 Sep 2020
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Summary
“The first group I sent over made the Avengers uncomfortable by thanking them constantly and asking for autographs. The next group stole things to sell on ebay. The group after that didn’t even get through the front door because Stark’s security system found something in their background that we missed. The fourth group left traumatized after cleaning out Thor’s room, apparently the god had some beheaded poultry dripping blood into a bowl in there. Then after that every group I’ve left hasn’t lasted more than three days because of some problem or another. I’m pretty sure one of those assholes has made it a game to scare my workers away.”
“I don’t think you’re supposed to call the heroes of New York assholes.”
Or, cleaning up after the Avengers involves more than just getting blood stains out of the carpet and most of them can't take the heat. Thankfully the Savior of the Wizarding has spent the last decade cleaning up after Death Eaters, so she's up to the task. Nothing, not pranks, bird corpses, or unidentified slime will keep her from cleaning up.
This Fic is now complete!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 392,453
- Chapters:
- 80/80
- Collections:
- 32
- Comments:
- 17,783
- Kudos:
- 28,776
- Bookmarks:
- 9,532
- Hits:
- 1,290,183
Bookmarked by blueberrycrocodiles
12 Feb 2022
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Bookmarker's Notes
Marvel Faves, HP Faves, MCU HP Faves, Brilliant World building, Nuanced and thoughtful character development. Ride or Die Golden Trio Friendship