Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“You going home, Charlie Rae?”

A pair of bright brown eyes turned to look into the green ones of her colleague; black and blue hair framing her face while her smile brightened the room. “Yeah, I’m done. I’ll see you tomorrow, Macy.” Macy waved at her before pushing some strands of her brown hair that escaped her bun as she watched the young adult walk out the door.

A pair of black Vans barely made a sound in the noisy city of Hell’s Kitchen as the black and blue streaked layered hair went up into a ponytail.

Charlie Rae dug her iPhone out of the left back pocket of her black shorts and slung her black bag over her shoulder; pulling her black and white checkered sleeveless shirt down to cover her ass. Even though it was the hottest summer yet in New York; she tugged her black above the elbow length fingerless gloves up a little more and cursed the heat. Charlie couldn’t wait to get her hands on a cherry slushie before making her way to Central Park.

She just had one thing left to do.

She checked the time and made her way to the bus stop, carefully keeping to herself as others waited for the bus as well. Digging through her bag, she pulled out her fare money as the bus came in sight and patiently awaited her turn to board. As soon as she paid and was seated by the window, she brought her pale legs up close to her chest; watching the buildings go by as the bus started to move. A baby started to cry as she watched people become a blur of colors and shapes and someone coughed to her left; making her grimace slightly.

Public transportation was only nice to ride on occasion.

A ding on the bus announced the next stop and Charlie got up, making her way to the front of the bus. She smiled at the bus driver and thanked him before exiting; holding her breath as the vehicle hissed out air. She slowly let it out as it continued on its way and turned to walk up the steps of an old red bricked building, squinting her eyes as she walked through the door; the gust of wind blowing her fringe around. Flicking her hair to its appropriate position to the left of her forehead, she smiled at the receptionist at the front desk.

“Hi, Delores. Is mom awake?”

Delores glanced at her over her wide brimmed glasses and grinned. “Good afternoon, Charlie Rae. Your mother just got done eating her lunch but you’ll have a few minutes to visit before she needs to sleep.” Charlie flashed her a smile. “Thank you.”

Coughing and quiet voices reached her ears as Charlie walked down the white hallways of the hospital toward the room her mom was in; smiling at personnel and patients alike. She stopped at the white door and knocked quietly before slipping in. “Hey, mom.”

Daisy Vaughn looked away from the window at the sound of her daughter’s voice and smiled. “Hi, baby girl.” Charlie quietly walked to her bed, the white sheets and blanket making her inwardly cringe, and bent down to hug the petite woman. “How did therapy go?”

Daisy frowned as Charlie pulled up a chair and took a clammy, pale yellow hand in hers.

Her mom hated it when she asked about her chemo and radiation therapy but Charlie needed to ask. She had already one type of cancer before but pancreatic cancer is so much different than breast cancer. They were able to catch that early about five years ago but the doctors looked and sounded concerned when Charlie had brought Daisy in due to her skin turning yellow in some areas. She had been diagnosed with Stage Three pancreatic cancer and admitted into the hospital almost a year ago, never leaving the white walls again. Charlie had bugged the doctors and nurses and the only thing they could tell her was that chemo and radiation therapy was her mother’s best hopes.

Charlie had gone home that night, much to her annoyance, and looked up all she could on pancreatic cancer. Surgery was a major option along with chemo and radiation but the doctors had not brought that up.

Her mom was a lot worse than she thought.

Daisy fixed the red beanie on her shaved head before answering; her blue eyes showing disproval. “It’s going fine, sweetie. Don’t worry about it.” Her daughter cracked a small smile; her left eyebrow raising. “Every time you say that and every time I’m going to answer with ‘It’s my turn to watch over you’.” The woman in the bed chuckled, giving Charlie enough signs that today had been somewhat of a good day. She was usually in pain and her medication did little to help; maybe they had upgraded her painkillers to a stronger one.

Her mom’s nurse, Kendra, came in to quietly talk to Daisy while Charlie watched the IV drip. She prayed all the time that the chemo medication in the drip and all the therapy would, somehow, produce a miracle and that her mom would be okay. The sickly thin, fragile woman was all that Charlie had left, besides the kind old lady across the hall from her apartment who had adopted her as a granddaughter, and she really didn’t know how she was going to deal with her mom dying. As much as she hoped and prayed she didn’t, the small voice in her head told her to prepare for the worst. But her mom seemed to be doing somewhat better and Charlie hoped this was the breakthrough they needed.

She didn’t fully believe that though.

Shaking her head slightly and disguising it as messing with her fringe, she looked up at the nurse as the blonde woman turned her head to look at her. “Charlie Rae, your mom needs rest now.” Nodding, she got up from the chair and kissed Daisy’s forehead; the skin feeling as cold and clammy as her hand. “Love you, mom. I’ll come by the day after tomorrow.” Her mom squeezed her hand and smiled a little when Charlie pulled back. “Love you too, sweet girl. Take care of yourself. Even with that Daredevil cleaning the streets, it’s still dangerous.”

Charlie nodded and walked out of the room while Kendra fixed the blankets on the bed.

“Charlie Rae, it’s good to see you.”

Smiling, she turned to find Dr. Blake Winston, her mother’s appointed doctor. “It’s good to see you too, Doc.” Dr. Winston nodded toward the way Charlie needed to go out and they stepped into a slow pace walk. The brown-eyed woman glanced at the dark skinned man. “Doc, can I ask you a question?” The doctor was looking at a clipboard in his hand but looked up at the sound of Charlie’s voice. “You know you always can, kid.”

Charlie bit her lower lip.

“Is my mom dying?”

Dr. Winston stopped and Charlie’s throat started to close up as she stopped as well. She reached into her bag, searching around until she found a small object, her inhaler, and wrapped her fingers around it tightly. “Charlie, we are doing all we can to make your mother comfortable as she goes through treatments.” Counting to three and taking a deep breath, Charlie shook her head. “That’s not what I asked, Doc.”

The few seconds of silence was enough for Charlie to grip the inhaler tighter with her right hand and reach up with the left to finger the tattoo choker and the cord choker with an angel wings charm around her neck.

“Your mother is a very sick woman, Charlie. You know that cancer is not to be taken lightly and it takes some time to heal; if it heals at all. Pancreatic cancer is one of those illnesses that’s a waiting game; an illness you need to catch in the beginning to stop it quickly. Your mother was at Stage Three when you bought her in. It was serious enough then that it was only a fifty/fifty percent chance that we could still beat it. I said in the beginning if anything changes that I would tell you.” The doctor sighed softly. “Charlie, she’s at Stage Four and has been for a few months. The only thing that has changed is that she is getting worse. We’ve upped the dose of morphine to make her more comfortable, switched her to drinking more liquids instead of eating solids and are trying not to do more harm than good with the severity of the chemo and radiation.”

He lightly put a hand on Charlie’s right shoulder.

“You need to start thinking of the worst possibility.”

And all at once, that slushie didn’t sound so good anymore.

Chapter Text

Charlie walked out of the hospital into the unforgiving heat and yet she still felt cold.

After a horrible panic attack had brought upon an asthmatic one, Charlie needed to go someplace where she remembered always being happy. She hailed a cab and got in, telling the cab driver where she needed to go. Her thoughts swirled in her head and uneasiness crept into her chest. She dug into her bag and pulled out her inhaler; breathing in the medication once more. There wasn’t any danger of her having another attack at that second but she didn’t want to chance it. Her anxiety attacks always provoked one and she’d rather not deal with one again.

Not after what she had been told.

Her mom was dying and nothing was working.

The city blurred as she sat in the back of the cab. She constantly felt the cab driver’s eyes on her and silently thanked God that he didn’t ask any questions. All she wanted to do now was process everything and stuff it behind the walls she had built. She would grieve at a later time, in the privacy of her own apartment and hopefully after her mother had passed. Dr. Winston didn’t tell her exactly when her mother would pass, just gave her an estimate of a few months. That Charlie could handle and it would make things easier to process; give her time to sort legal documents and her headspace.

The cab came to a halt and the rustling of clothes up front made Charlie actually focus outside the window. The carousel was brightly lit up before her and the faint music reached her ears. She paid the cab driver and he gave her sympathetic look; like he knew exactly what she was going through. Pushing aside her slight annoyance, she gave him a small smile before closing the door. She didn’t like pity or sympathy from people; there had been too much of that in past years for her.

Pulling her left glove up some more, she weaved through the people who had gathered around the carousel to watch their children have fun and took a seat in the shade. She breathed in deeply and focused her attention in front of her; listening to the now louder music and children’s laughter. A small smile graced her lips as she remembered coming to this spot with her family long ago; a long, long time ago.

“Charlie!”

Her head snapped up at the sound of her name and smiled bigger as she saw one of the head vets at the animal hospital where she worked coming towards her with her daughter. She got up and hugged the older woman. “Hi, Carol. What’s up, Sophie?” Hugging the four-year-old girl, she looked up at her mother as she spoke. “Hi, Charlie. Do you mind watching Sophie for a few minutes? I need to head to the restrooms before her dad comes and picks us up.” Charlie nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

The woman thanked her and walked off as Sophie slipped her hand through Charlie’s; the two of them going on a small walk around the carousel. Sophie giggled and danced a little while she walked with her; letting out a squeal of delight when Charlie twirled her around. Charlie quickly picked her up and spun her around; Sophie’s laughter rang throughout the park. People looked at them; some with a small smile and other’s with a disapproved look like they thought that Sophie was Charlie’s kid. Charlie brushed it off, getting looks from people was part of her daily life.

A few minutes later after much twirling and laughing, Carol came back and smiled at the two of them. “Thanks so much, Charlie. Her dad is here and we still have some stuff to pack.” Charlie smiled and nodded. Sophie and her family were moving to a different state as her dad had been promoted in his job. “When do you leave?” Carol sighed tiredly and tucked a piece of Sophie’s blonde hair behind her ear. “Early tomorrow.” Nodding, Charlie brought the woman into a hug. “I’ll miss you, Carol.”

“I’ll miss you too, Charlie.”

Kneeling down, Charlie tapped Sophie on the nose. “Be good, kiddo. And take care of your mom and dad, okay?” Sophie threw her arms around the young woman and promised she would. Charlie stood up and waved as the two females walked off; returning the gesture. Sighing deeply, she checked the time on her phone before deciding to head back to her apartment.

As she turned to leave, her eye caught a rather unusual sight.

A man with a military crew cut was sitting on a bench a few feet away from her. What had mostly caught her attention was the black jacket he wore. Now, Charlie knew that she looked ridiculous with her gloves and she knew that a lot of people in this city wore long sleeves due to their clothing style. But this man looked military and appeared to have both his arms so he wasn’t hiding a prosthetic. He looked to be in serious thought and Charlie shook her head; continuing her path out of the park. She was very aware of all the people around her and all the eyes; her own shifting around to evaluate people. Looking over the area with the man, she felt her heart stop in her chest when she locked eyes with him. Trying not to appear rude or afraid, she gave him a small smile in a polite gesture and hurriedly walked out of the park. She walked along the sidewalk, keeping close to the buildings, and within ten minutes, she had arrived at her apartment.

Buzzing herself in and pulling out her keyring, she quickly checked her mailbox; grabbing the few white envelopes in the box. She greeted the doorman, Al, and continued her way up to the fourth floor where she lived. Music reached her ears as she passed the few doors to get to her own; smiling when she heard the jazz coming from Gram’s across the hall from her and unlocked her door.

She took a relaxing deep breath as she stepped inside.

Two tiny heads popped up from the small mound of blankets on her bed and she smiled as the tiny kittens jumped up to run to her. She had been caring for them since someone had dropped them off at the animal hospital a few weeks back. The black haired brother and sister had been malnourished and filthy; Charlie had only meant to keep them until they were well enough to be put up for adoption. But it was lonely in the apartment and there had been no new animals that needed looking after for a while. So Charlie told the vets that she would keep them herself and they had allowed her to.

Kneeling down, she gave them a good rubbing before throwing her bag on the black futon in front of the small flatscreen TV and placing the envelopes on the kitchen counter. “Come on, Shadow. Duchess.” Both kittens rubbed against her legs, their soft fur tickling her ankles, as she opened her door once more. They followed her to the door across the hall and Charlie knocked quietly before opening the door she knew would be unlocked.

“Hey, Gram.”

An elderly lady wearing a blue dress turned around, smiling. The kittens quickly walked over toward her as Charlie closed the door; mewing at the old lady. “I was hoping you’d come by today, Charlie Rae.”

The young woman smiled. “You know I always do.”

Chapter Text

Pain.

Pain.

Pain.

Pain.

Charlie Rae woke up screaming her lungs out, her heart threatening to beat out of her chest, and sat up. Clawing her way toward the nightstand beside her bed, she clumsily grabbed for her inhaler; shoving it into her mouth and taking deep breaths as the medication went towards her lungs. From the dim city lights that shone through her windows, she made out Duchess’ eyes from her pillow and Shadow’s from the windowsill beside her bed.

Swinging her legs over the side of the mattress, she pulled her purple tank top strap back over her left shoulder from where it had fallen in her frenzy to breathe. Her lungs burned from the attack and her heart was slowly but surely working it’s way to a normal rate as she looked around her apartment.

She was glad her mom had gotten it as it was an open space, save for the bathroom. The living room area was the first place you walked into from the door. A black futon and a blue chair were set around a black coffee table before a small TV stand with the flatscreen. A silver floor lamp sat behind the chair as well and a tiny, tall table say next to it; holding her mom’s favorite books. Behind the futon was a small, dark brown four-seater table with an orchid plant as a centerpiece. The small kitchen sat in an alcove along the wall that separated Gram’s apartment from her’s and the bathroom was along that same wall. Pictures were set on the tables, the TV stand and hung from walls; almost all of them were of Charlie and her mom.

Her bed sat pushed against the bricked walls in the farthest corner of the room. The nightstand was to the left with a window behind it. A chest laid at the foot of the bed and so did another window; a bookcase on the other side of it. Charlie and her mom had hung a pole on the wall that separated the “bedroom” from the bath to hang their clothing with a shelf above that. A shoe rack was put under the clothes and Charlie still remembered the moment she finally knew she was home in this small brick wall apartment. Back then, her mom’s colored clothes had clashed with her darker clothing; their shoes doing the same thing. But now, almost all of her mom’s clothes and shoes were gone, put into storage in the basement, and Charlie swallowed the lump in her throat as she pushed the black comforter away and made her way to the couch.

She wasn’t gonna get any more sleep.

Plopping down on the futon, she grabbed a dark green crocheted blanket her mom had made on a good day at the hospital and curled up in it. She grabbed the remote and turned on the TV for background noise as she remembered her conversation with Gram earlier.

“Mom’s dying, Gram.”

The old woman turned from the casserole she was making to look at Charlie who was sitting at the table; her two kittens resting on the other chairs. “I’m sorry, sweetie.”

Charlie didn’t want pity but she looked at Gram with tears in her eyes.

“I’m gonna lose her, Gram. She’s the best thing that has ever happened to me in years and I’m gonna lose her.” Gram put down the spoon she was holding and walked toward the young woman, wrapping her up in a hug. “Your mom would say the same thing about you too, baby girl. But you can’t thwart the will of God.” Charlie took a deep breath and the old woman rubbed her back. “You have done everything you could have done for her, Charlie Rae. And the doctors that took care of Daisy were the best in that area of expertise. There’s nothing more you could have done.”

Charlie wrapped the blanket tighter around herself as Duchess and Shadow decided to join her. Shadow walked along the back of the futon before sliding into the blanket to cuddle at her chest and Duchess curled up between her legs and the couch. Dipping her head low, Charlie nuzzled the tiny animal and he pushed his face into her’s; his purr vibrating throughout his body.

She let her head hang back to rest against the couch but lifted it up again as something on the news caught her ear. Turning up the volume, she paid attention.

“A shooting took place earlier tonight as a local gang was shot by unknown persons. Police are not giving out information about the shooters at this time but as you can see behind me; it is a nightmarish scene. Approximately ten gang members were killed with a few more injured. The gang had fled the scene before the police arrived and without any affirmative answers, it looks like they were hit by a rival gang. No further intel has been released..”

Charlie narrowed her eyes at the screen. She had seen plenty of dead bodies in photographs, due to her mom’s job as a lawyer before she was diagnosed, but never like this. The bodies were still laying in the streets; dark, huge lumps that were barely visible due to the horrible lighting of the street lamps. Red and blue police lights bounced off the buildings and the police were keeping the press as well as passersbyers as far back as they could. Charlie took in a deep breath as her brows furrowed; Shadow gently kneading her arm with his paws.

There has always been gang violence in Hell’s Kitchen, being on the Hudson has its perks, but there was never anything like this. Sure, rival gangs would have turf wars and deals gone bad but never, ever like this. This was something else entirely. This was an ambush; maybe even a hit. The press had it wrong and the press was almost always wrong until they had the facts handed to them on a silver platter. Charlie also knew it wasn’t the Daredevil doing this. The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen never killed anyone.

That meant that Hell’s Kitchen had new players in the field.

Charlie knew a lot about the gangs around the Kitchen due to past issues with them and this would set off the ones in the area. She would have to be extremely cautious while coming home from work when she worked the evening shift at the animal clinic; not that she wasn’t already. Perhaps she should get a dog, a big one. One that the clinic would have no problem with her bringing in and big enough that maybe everyone would just stay away. There were plenty of dogs in the shelters; finding one would not be a problem at all.

Or maybe she was just being paranoid like always and she should calm the fuck down.

Chapter Text

“Did you hear what happened last night on the news?”

Charlie pushed her bangs away from her face as she sat at the front desk in the animal hospital and looked at Macy. “The one about the gang?” Macy nodded. “Yeah. I heard that the men who were injured are babbling nonsense about an army attacking them. Weird, isn’t it?” Charlie nodded slowly. “Kinda, I guess. There’s always been gang activity though. Maybe someone decided to up their game.” Macy made a face and grabbed some folders off the desk, putting them away in alphabetical order in the file cabinet. “That could be the case. Whatever it is, be careful out there, Charlie Rae. The attack took place only a couple of blocks away from your apartment.”

Charlie waved her off. “I’ll be fine. Nothing has happened to me and I’ve lived here for a long time.” Macy snorted. “Bet that’s what the gangs said too.” The younger woman glared up at the older one as a bell dinged; signaling a costumer. “You, Macy, need a more exciting life. Hi there! How can I help you?”

----------------------------------------------

”Be careful, Charlie Rae! See you tomorrow!”

Charlie waved to Macy as the woman walked out the front door before going to the back room of the clinic. She pulled her bag out of her locker and quickly changed out of her black scrubs; pulling on some black skinnies and combat boots before slipping a moon phase tank top over her head. Grabbing her gloves, she quickly tugged them on before slinging her bag over her shoulder and running out of the clinic to catch the bus.

Kendra had called her on her lunch break with an update that her mom was having a semi-good day and that she loved her. Charlie Rae smiled when she remembered hearing her mother over the phone and promised to come by tomorrow but that she needed to sleep; which is why Charlie didn’t go to the hospital. Today was the day her mother usually had the worst of the therapies and it was best to leave her alone afterwards.

She made her way through the small crowd when she arrived at the carousel and looked down at her phone when it buzzed. Seeing that it was an email from one of her mom’s lawyer friend’s, she quickly opened it to see what they had said. She collided with a solid structure and apologies started spewing from her mouth.

“I’m so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention, which is totally all my fault. Ah, jeez, I’m really sorry for being a klutz. ”

She looked up to see the man she had been staring at yesterday was the one she had run into. He had a five o’clock shadow and his eyes were slightly sunken in or else it was his broad forehead that made it look that way. He appeared way more muscular up close and the man was now looking down at her. Charlie shook her fringe out of face; shaking that thought out of her mind in the process before furrowing her brows. “I’m really sorry. Did I hurt you?” The man looked taken back at her sincerity while at the same time looked thoroughly amused; like he couldn’t believe she was asking that. “No, no. I’m fine. I think I should be asking you that though.” His voice was deep and soft spoken; something Charlie instantly liked about him. Soft spoken people were usually her favorite people to talk to. That is, when she did talk to people. She chuckled nervously. “Yeah, I guess that was a stupid question. But, um, I’m alright. No need to ask.” The man nodded at her and looked like he was about to walk off but stopped when Charlie stuck out her hand; her mind frazzling at the sudden courage she magically obtained. “My name’s Charlotte.” He raised an eyebrow but took her hand in his calloused ones; the two of them shaking them. “Frank Castle.” Charlie tilted her head at him; her thoughts running at a hundred miles per hour before settling on one that seemed the most logical. “Tell me if I’m prying but did you serve, sir?” He bit his lip and Charlie shook her head frantically; anxiety settling in almost immediately afterwards. “Shit, I’m so sorry. That was a prying question. Um, uh, I’ll leave you alone. Um, I bet you’re busy. Um, uh, yeah, it was nice meeting you, Mr. Castle.” Charlie felt her cheeks warm up and went to move around him; her hands shaking and reaching into her bag for her inhaler as her throat started to close.

“Frank.”

She stopped and looked up at him with questioning eyes. He looked nervous; like he was just like her and had horrible people skills. Or maybe it was because he was a convicted criminal. Charlie chuckled mentally at that one.

“Call me Frank. Mr. Castle makes me sound like some old man.”

Charlie licked her lips and nodded her head. “Frank then. You can call me Charlie Rae.” He lifted an eyebrow at her and she dipped her head; anxiety creeping back into her chest. “It’s a nickname I was given and it just stuck. Besides, everyone who knows me calls me it and, well, I guess technically you know me.” She finally did pull out her inhaler and brought it to her lips; Frank’s brows furrowing as he straightened in his stance. “You okay?”

Charlie nodded and held up a finger in a waiting motion before drawing a second breath; stuffing the small container back into her bag. “I am. Just my anxiety getting to me.” He didn’t look convinced and Charlie didn’t know how to take his concern; if it was concern she saw in his features. “I’m really serious. I’ve dealt with it my whole life and I’m not dead yet.” Frank nodded and looked around them as the crowd started to get thicker. Charlie spotted a bench a few feet away from the coffee cart and bit her lip. “Well, um, would you like a coffee? As an apology gesture for running you over?”

Frank chuckled and flashed a small smile; like he sincerely thought it was funny. “I guess it’d be rude to turn you down.” Charlie shrugged as the two of the started to move toward the cart. “You have your right to. I mean, you still could if you wanted to. I won’t be offended in any way.” Frank shook his head a little. “It’s quite alright. Beside I could have used some coffee about now anyway.” Charlie Rae chuckled. “Well I’m glad I asked then. Um, one medium coffee with vanilla creamer. Frank?” She turned toward him after flashing the coffee man a smile; offering the man beside her one as well. He shrugged his shoulders a little. “Just some black will do.”

Charlie made a face and pulled out her wallet; paying for the coffees. “So you’re one of those people that just drink straight black.” She took her coffee in hand; gripping it tightly as her gloves offered her little friction and waited as Frank grabbed his. “What did ya think I’d get?” He followed her slowly to the bench and watched as she breathed in the smell of vanilla from her coffee; his eyes glancing down at her gloves before quickly returning to her face. She laughed slightly. “Either black or a whole lotta sugar.”

Frank flashed a smile before taking a drink of his coffee.

The two remained quiet for a moment before Frank cleared his throat. “About your question earlier…” Charlie turned to him with curiosity. “About you serving?” He nodded before taking another sip. “Yeah, that one. To answer it, I did serve.” Charlie tilted her head and Frank saw a spark of interest in her brown eyes. “What branch?”

“Marine Corps.”

“Occupation?”

Frank chuckled. “You thinking about going into the military?” Charlie let out a laugh and smiled while she sipped her coffee; Frank watching her every move. “No, I’m not. I used to know people who went into the military. I find it interesting.” The male nodded while studying her. “I was a scout sniper before I was discharged.”

Charlie nodded her head, not pressing on the word ‘discharge’ as to respect his privacy at least some. “Sounds like an interesting position.” Frank nodded his head to the side and scrunched up the left side of his face as a dead breeze began to blow; Charlie scrunching up her nose. “Definitely had it’s moments.”

A buzz brought Charlie’s attention from Frank to her phone and she saw her mom’s best lawyer friend had texted her and wanted to meet in ten minutes; another text from the office manager of the clinic asking if she’d cover for someone’s shift. “Aw, shit, I’m sorry but I have to go.” Frank furrowed his brow. “Everything okay?” Charlie Rae smiled a little at the concern; amazed at how at ease Frank made her feel. “Yeah, I just gotta meet with a lawyer about some things.” She stuck out her hand as Frank stood up and he shook it. “It as nice meeting you, Frank, and thank you for your service.”

Frank gave her a small smile of his own. “Pleasure is all mine. Just don’t go running into people anymore.” Charlie’s cheeks heated up and that did not go unnoticed by him. “I’ll try not to. See you around.”

The former marine watched her walk off; following her carefully through the crowd with his eyes. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had spoken like that to him or had treated him like she had. Watching her safely get into a cab, he relaxed his muscles that he hadn’t known were tensed and finished the rest of his coffee.

Charlie Rae would be someone he would never forget.

Chapter Text

“You know there’s no need to hurry. Right, Charlie?”

Charlie Rae took a deep breath as she sat across from her mom’s friend, Stacy. The woman had been a lawyer alongside her mom and the two had met on more than one occasion to discuss cases and other official business. Charlie’s mom had trusted Stacy with a lot of things and Charlie trusted her too; something she rarely gave to people.

“I know, Stacy. But it’ll be easier for me.” Stacy nodded at her and Charlie almost bristled at the pity in her eyes. She understood why it was there; she just didn’t like it. Stacy flipped through a couple of documents before her. “Your mother did contact me and we have been going through a few thing together as well. Everything should go smoothly after her passing.”

Charlie’s eye physically twitched but Stacy didn’t even notice.

Mom. Not mother.

She was Charlie’s mom.

Charlie bit her tongue and nodded. “That’s all I really want to know. If everything is gonna be okay; even if I don’t show my face for a while.” The woman across from her began to gather documents up and she smiled at Charlie. “Don’t worry, kiddo. I’ll take care of everything and only call you if you need to be present.”

“Thanks, Stacy. It means a lot to me and to mom.”

The lawyer smiled bigger. “It’s the least I can do. You mother helped me with a tough case right before she was admitted and I never got to pay her back. This is one way of doing it.” Charlie nodded and cracked a small smile. “She did mention that once or twice.” Stacy laughed; the smile on Charlie’s face growing a little bigger as the older woman started to pack the documents before her up. “Everything will be fine, Charlie Rae. I’ll be in contact with you if I need you to sign or oversee anything.” Charlie nodded once more. “Thanks for this, Stacy.”

“It’s no problem. I have to head back to the office now. I would recommend you stay here and have the diner’s pancakes. They’re very good.”

The younger female smiled. “Maybe I will. Bye, Stacey.”

She watched the older woman leave the diner and took a deep breath; fingering the handle of the coffee mug before her. She stared into the caffeinated liquid that looked like it had way too much cream in it and let the world around her fade.

Her mom was dying and her mom knew.

She swallowed hard and took a deep breath; cupping the mug before taking a drink. The busy city outside the window bustled; no one even knowing what she was going through. But she didn’t know about them either.

“Charlie Rae?”

Her head snapped up at the sound of her name and a smile spread across her face. “Frank. Fancy seeing you here.” The male pointed to the seat across from her that Stacy had occupied. “Mind if I sit?” Charlie shook her head no and took another sip of coffee as Frank sat down; the black duffel bag he was carrying beside him. “Never pegged you for a diner girl.” She chuckled. “I was meeting a family lawyer friend and decided to stay a while longer.”

Frank raised an eyebrow. “Everything okay?”

“Peachy.”

He nodded and Charlie knew he didn’t really believe her. She could read people quite easily and she honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he could too. He thumped his thumbs on the table. “So what can you get in a place like this?”

“Well, their coffee is good and I hear their pancakes are fantastic.”

He smirked at her. “Heard that from a family lawyer friend?” She laughed and shrugged her shoulders. “They’re a reliable source.” Charlie Rae watched as Frank raised a hand and the waitress that had served her coffee came over. “What can I get you, hon?” Frank flashed her a smile. “I’ll have a cup of your coffee and I hear your pancakes are fantastic so I want to see if this is true.” Charlie cracked a smile when his gaze flickered to her and the waitress nodded; writing it all down before she turned to her. “Can I get you anything else?” Charlie shook her head. “No, thank you.” She fingered the handle on the mug as Frank settled back into the chair; thanking the waitress when she came back with his own cup of coffee. He took a sip and waited a few seconds; Charlie raising an eyebrow. “Well. That is good coffee.”

The young woman smiled cheekily at him. “Told ya so.”

He almost glared at her and she smiled sweetly at him before taking another drink. “So why didn’t you order anything?” Charlie licked her lips and checked her phone; 1:00 PM proudly displayed on the screen. “I got to get to work here soon and I don’t do well on the bus with a full stomach.” Frank slowly nodded his head; his food arriving while Charlie had talked. “Where do you work?”

“At the 24-hour vet clinic over on 33^rd.”

He pointed his fork at her. “I pegged you as an animal person.” Charlie chuckled and looked out the window before looking back at him. “Guilty as charged.” She took another sip as Frank dug into his pancakes; his eyes looking back up at her. “Not much of a talker are you?”

The young female shrugged. “It’s not that I don’t like talking. Most conversations usually just end after everything is said. “Like ‘how are you’, ‘what are you doing now’ and ‘how’s the weather’.” She quirked an eyebrow at Frank. “It’s usually the other person in the conversation that keeps it going.”

Frank gave her a look. “Well, sorry to burst your bubble but I’m not a very chatty person.”

“I figured that out on my own.”

The muscular male narrowed his eyes at Charlie and she grinned. “I’m fine if we sit in silence as long as it doesn’t get too awkward.” She glanced down at her watch. “But unfortunately, I need to go. I’m covering someone’s late shift.” Charlie tapped her cup handle. “Which means I need more caffeine.”

Frank’s stare kept getting more intense. “What time do you get off work?”

The waitress came over in that second and Charlie ordered a large coffee to go and her check before turning back to the male in front of her. “Hopefully by midnight. Unless something happens and I need to stay later.”

“Isn’t your work in a heavy gang area?”

Charlie shook her head. “Technically no. It’s on the outskirts but they have been broadening their territories. So at the moment, no it’s not. In a week or two? It probably will be.”

Frank seemed to accept her answer and rested his elbows on the table. “Just be careful.”

“Aw, Frank. You going sweet on me?”

One of his eyes almost twitched.

Charlie Rae knew how to safely push the right buttons.

She loved pushing buttons and making comebacks dripping with sarcasm. Her mom used to laugh and shake her head or give her a full on glare when Charlie needed to stop. Her coworkers learned to work around her snarkiness when it was shown and she could be totally serious but still snap back with sarcasm. She was good at it.

At that second, the waitress came back with her receipt and coffee.

She grabbed them both before flashing a smile at Frank. “Thanks for the company and concern. For a serious guy, you make pretty good conversation.”

Frank watched her leave and kept watching her through the glass windows. She pulled up one glove before switching her coffee to the other hand; pulling up the second one. He watched as she walked to the bus stop and kept well away from the other people before boarding the bus when it arrived.

Charlie Rae had caught his attention for sure.

And he honestly didn’t want any harm to come to her.

Chapter Text

Over the next week, Frank popped up at the most random of times.

And surprisingly, Charlie Rae thought nothing of it.

He would always ask how she was, how her work was going, and if she had any trouble making it home on her late nights. The gang shootings had continued, almost every night a new gang had been torn to shreds, and Charlie had actually let the notion that Frank was the culprit sneak into her mind.

She always shook her head afterwards but the thought was still there, like a little box in the back of her mind.

“Hey, Charlie!”

Charlie looked up from the dog she was bringing in from the outside kennel to see Macy bringing another dog in for boarding. The young woman slipped the leash off of the pup before locking the dog in its kennel and walking over to help Macy. “Yes?”

Macy handed her a clipboard with the board dates and the list of things that was brought with the dog as she walked inside the kennel. “Did you hear about the pawn shop murder?”

Furrowing her brow, Charlie got a water bowl and proceeded to fill it up for the new boarder. “Which pawn shop?”

“The real sketchy one.”

“The one on 21^st?” Macy nodded as Charlie handed her the bowl and pet the dog before walking out of the kennel. “That’s the one. They say it was a robbery because there was no money in the register but that was the only thing that was missing.”

Charlie shrugged her shoulders as she pulled the sleeve of her long sleeved shirt down and straightened her scrub top. “Unfortunately I can’t bring myself to have sympathy. The guy was sketchy as hell and you can bet your butt that there were illegal things going in that store.”

“The police say that most of things were stolen goods; a few things with underage kids too.”

Clicking her tongue, Charlie gave Macy a pointed stare. “My point exactly.”

The older female shook her head as Charlie looked down at her hand and swallowed hard. Her fingers were visibly shaking and she clenched them into a tight fist before freezing as Macy grabbed on to it with her own. “You doing okay?”

Forcing a tight smile on to her face, Charlie nodded. “Yeah. It’s just my nerves.”

“Your mom?”

Nodding slowly, the raven head flexed her hand once more before flashing her coworker a smile. “I’ll be fine. Just wanna go home and sleep.”

Macy nodded as the two worked side by side in the kennels; helping the kennel girl take care of the boarders so they could all go home in at a decent time. The girl thanked them and Charlie Rae gave her a smile before heading to her locker. She sneezed as pet dander got blown around the back of the clinic and opened her asthma medication bottle as she took out two. Throwing them into the back of her throat and dry swallowing them, she sipped from a water bottle as footsteps were heard from behind her.

“You better not be working yourself up into an attack, Charlie.”

Dr. Summers was standing behind the girl as she shook her head; flicking her fringe out of her face when she stood still. “No ma’am, I promise I’m not. Just trying to stay on top of it.”

The vet quirked an eyebrow at her as Charlie bent over to redo her ponytail. “If you say so. Macy said that she has most of the paperwork for your shift done so you can go ahead and go. She volunteered to stay behind to finish up.”

“I can stay if I need to, Dr. Summers.”

Shaking her head, Summers made a shooing motion. “Go see your mom before the day ends. And your blue is fading.”

Charlie frowned as she touched her hair. “You’re colorblind. You don’t know that.”

Dr. Summers sent the young woman a cheeky grin which made Charlie frown even more and shook her head as the vet walked away. Grabbing her change of clothes from inside the locker, she quickly stripped off her work clothes and redressed before hopping about to put on her Vans. She pulled her gloves up high as she slung her bag over her shoulder before saying farewell to the receptionist.

By the time she approached the hospital, she had been catcalled twice, had a mild asthma attack when she forgot to hold her breath because of fumes, and had one person remark on her gloves.

A typical day in Hell’s Kitchen.

She said hello to Delores and was making her way to her mom’s room when she heard someone call out her name. Turning around, she inwardly groaned as she smile at the person walking towards her.

It was her asthma doctor, Delaney.

The brunette doctor said something into the walkie earpiece she had on before looking at Charlie as she stood in front. "Fancy seeing you here, Charlie Rae. You wouldn’t so happen to be here for an appointment, hm?

Appointment.

Right.

Charlie’s regular doctor’s visit to check on her lungs that the raven head had put off for several months. Delaney had called in her prescription medications for her to pick up every month with the question ‘have you made your appointment’ and each time, Charlie made up an excuse. It’s not that she didn’t appreciate what the doctor did. Charlie just didn’t like what the exam entailed.

But it was time to make adjustments to her meds if need be.

The raven head sighed with a frown. “If you have time today, can you fit me in?”

Delaney smiled wickedly. “I heard you were coming in and freed up some time for you. See your mom but then I expect you in the lobby in five.”

Charlie mumbled a ‘yes ma’am’ before turning and walking into her mom’s room with a slight knock. “Can I trouble you not to tell people I’m coming in?”

Daisy smiled at her daughter. “Delaney get to you?”

Huffing and sitting down in her chair, Charlie gently took her mom’s hand in her own. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate what they do here, especially with Delaney putting up with me. I just…. I don’t like being here for more time than I have to.”

“Baby girl, it’s for your own health that you do this.”

Charlie nodded and spent the next several minutes talking to her mom before the nurse came in and said that it was time for another therapy session. The raven head clenched her jaw at the announcement and said goodbye as she hugged Daisy. She felt like false hope was being given when they all knew it wasn’t working.

Walking down the hall and stepping into the elevator, Charlie sighed as she made her way to the lobby.

And obviously, Delaney was there with her stupid smile.

“This way, Charlie Rae.”

The doctor may be nice but Charlie still hated that smile after all these years.

They went through the familiar halls as they did their routine: weight, height, etc, etc. They finally came to that familiar doctor’s room and Charlie hopped up onto the table as the paper crackled under her weight, plopping her bag beside her. Delaney held out her hand and Charlie gave her the inhaler she kept in it as well as her spare.

“How’ve you been doing these past few months?”

Charlie shrugged. “Okay I guess. My lungs haven’t felt any different.”

“Not feeling different doesn’t mean you don’t come in.”

The raven head frowned as her doctor wrote down the dosage she had been taking and got out her files from the last visit. Charlie wasn’t stupid. She knew her asthma could cause her problems. She just didn’t like the doctor visits that entailed.

Delaney held up the peak flow meter and Charlie sat up a little straighter. “Blow.”

Charlie took a deep breath as she grabbed it before taking another breath and breathing into the mouthpiece as fast and as hard as she could. Delaney wrote down the number she gotten before moving the bar on the scale down, nodding to Charlie. She had to do this two more times and by the end of it, she just wanted to go home.

“Your numbers dropped again, Charlie.”

The young female sighed and sagged her shoulders. “You said that they would over time.”

“Have you been using your meter at home?”

“On occasion.” Charlie replied with a shrug.

Delaney narrowed her eyes. “I’m very serious about this, Charlie. Use that meter. If your meds don’t work one of these days because you haven’t used it and brought it to my attention, that’s a problem.”

Charlie nodded and stared at her feet as her doctor rolled her chair over to get another instrument. Delaney listened to her heart and lungs, listening closely for any sound that wasn’t considered normal. She mentioned allergies to Charlie as she commented that her lungs sounded a little wet but it wasn’t anything that had been different before.

And then, finally, Charlie was cleared go home.

Chapter Text

After getting another lecture on setting up an appointment and actually showing up next time, Charlie was able to leave after getting her new medication. Her chest felt tight after the examination, like it always did, but this time it was giving her some problems as she tried to suck in some air without her lungs hurting.

It was dusk and the city was more alive than when she went into the hospital. She weaved around the crowd of people before hailing a cab and telling them to take her to Central Park, to the carousel. Brown orbs reflected the city lights as the cab traveled through the business of Hell’s Kitchen and Charlie watched the people go steadily by. She rubbed at her chest as she took a deep breath, wincing as she did.

“You okay back there, miss?”

Damn people and their sympathy.

Charlie Rae turned her head and flashed a smile to the cab driver as he looked at her from his windshield mirror. “I’m fine. Just had an appointment with my asthma doctor.”

The man nodded and she went back to looking outside, hoping that was the last he spoke to her.

Thank God it was.

The cab soon rolled up to Central Park and the young woman thanked the driver as she paid him. The music from the carousel was soothing as she made her way down the path towards it, the attraction lit up in the early night hours. A small smile graced Charlie’s lips as she pulled up her gloves and went to the concession stand, ordering a cherry slushie. She looked around as she waited and noticed a man staring at her, looking away and then glancing back at her again. Her brows furrowed as she slightly narrowed her eyes before pushing it aside in her mind as she took the slushie from the girl behind the counter.

The slushie sent a shiver down her spine as she started to slowly drink it; the freezing temperature numbing her lungs a bit and causing her to cough. She honestly shouldn’t be drinking it with how much the chilled drink affected her lungs, but it was one of her favorite things to buy here.

Charlie Rae walked around the entertainment attraction a few times as she finished off her drink, noting the man from earlier had stuck around for a few more minutes before leaving; brown eyes tracking him as he disappeared from view. From a young age, Charlie had always been observant and through the years it might have bordered paranoia but for good reasons. With the help of counselors, she was able to enjoy going places without looking over her shoulder constantly.

But still, that man had given her a weird feeling and Charlie was sure to be on the lookout for him when she came back to the carousel.

Usually, Charlie Rae would brave the walk to the apartment even though it strained her lungs, but it was getting dark and, she had to admit, did not want to run into any gang trouble. The massacres were happening regularly now and small-time gangs were rising in the ranks which made the bigger ones more frantic to protect themselves plus their territory. Even the mobs, mostly the Irish, were on edge and there were reports of them laying low which allowed to regular people to go about their days in peace.

Charlie still wasn’t chancing it as she took a cab home.

It was dark when she arrived at her apartment, and she froze when she heard gunshots in the distance. But it wasn’t just one or two shots like normal; it sounded like a full out war as the sounds echoed off the allies and brick buildings. Charlie fumbled with the door, and she met Al’s frightened eyes as the older gentleman stood up from his seat as she entered. “You alright, Ms. Charlie?”

She honestly wasn’t, her hands were shaking so bad, and her chest tightened to the point where she thought she was going to have an attack, but Charlie flashed a smile at the sweet man. “I’m fine, Al. It’s probably blocks away ‘cause we all know how the sound travels around here. We’ll be fine.”

Al nodded and said goodnight to her as she made her way up to her apartment as she fumbled inside her bag for her inhaler. She took two puffs and grimaced at the taste, almost sticking her tongue out as she reached her apartment door and unlocked it. Placing her bag on the table, she scurried over to her refrigerator while tripping over Duchess and Shadow and grabbed a soda, popping the tab. She grimaced as the taste of her medication mixed with the soda and left a bad taste in her mouth. Moving around the apartment, she changed into some comfy shorts and shirt before turning the TV on the news; the kittens meowing at her as she did.

The little shits knew she would never forget to feed them wet food, but they made sure to vocalize their wants anyway.

Charlie smiled as the two siblings greedily ate at their food and stroked the two of them before going over to the sofa to plop down on it; only to get back up to grab her bag off the table. Walking back to her spot with it in hand, she crossed her legs as she sat down and pulled out the files that Stacy had left her. Her eyes studied the words in front of her as she started to read the documents until her head snapped up to the sound of knocking on her door.

She faintly heard the kittens scatter to find a hiding place as she quickly gathered the documents up and stuffed them into her bag, cautiously walking toward her door. Looking through the peephole, she opened the door moments later; surprise written all over her face.

“Frank?”

Frank Castle stood in the hallway, covered from head to toe in black, with a blue colored pitbull at the end of a rope next to him. Charlie’s well-trained eyes zeroed in on the dog’s wounds that sluggishly oozed blood before beckoning Frank to come in. He hesitated for a second, still not speaking, as he stepped inside her apartment and stood nervously as Charlie closed the door.

“Sorry to bust in on you like this, Charlie Rae, but I needed some help patching him up.”

The pit bull was slowly wagging his tail as Charlie held a handout for it to sniff and got a lick in return. “It’s fine, Frank. Though I might be more concerned about you knowing where I live.”

The young woman was met with silence, and she narrowed her eyes a little before walking toward the bathroom to grab her first aid kit. Sitting cross legged on the floor, she called the dog over to her and it barreled into her arms; smearing blood on her as it nuzzled its head into her. “That’s a good pup. Hold still, lemme look at you. Frank, can you give me a hand? Ah, wait, can you get into that cupboard right there and get some treats? Then you can come help me.”

Charlie watched Frank closely as he did what he was told.

He walked with a swag but also military precision. His boots thumped on the ground and his muscles seemed extremely tense. Charlie continued to pet the dog as she waited, and she slowly felt around its belly and the inside of its legs. Her fingertips made out a series of bumps and she looked back up at Frank as he knelt in front of her with the treats. She flashed him a smile and nodded at the pit bull. “Thanks. Can you try to hold him still and feed him treats at the same time? Some of these need to be stitched up.”

He nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Jeez, man. You make me sound old.”

Frank cracked a cock-eyed smile as he looked down at the dog and Charlie let a small smile creep onto her face. She opened the first aid kit and grabbed a packet with an already threaded needed for stitches, adhesive bandages, and some butterfly bandages. Grabbing some alcohol swabs and cautiously tearing them open with her teeth, she lightly dabbed the scrapes and cuts with both the pit bull and Frank carefully observing her. She carefully pinched the skin on the dog’s left forearm and placed two butterfly bandages, smoothing them out and wrapping a light layer of bandages around it while murmuring soft praises to the pup.

The pit’s tail started to thump slowly against the floor before stopping completely as Charlie moved to its head. Frank was a silent watcher as he continued to stroke the blue fur and offer treats that were mostly left neglected. Taking the pre-threaded needle, Charlie kept softly talking to the pit as she started the tedious process of stitching up the dog’s head. Frank watched as she flexed her fingers, eyes shifting between the wound and the dog as she poked the needle through the first time; the both of them feeling the dog flinch and Charlie winced as it let out a soft whine.

“That’s it, good boy. That’s a good pup. Just hold still, I’m almost done.”

Charlie Rae fumbled around in her kit before grabbing what she was looking for. She cut the extra thread with the scissors from the kit and looked around for any other wounds.

“I think those were the only ones he had.”

The young woman nodded and began cleaning up her mess on the floor as Frank continued to stroke the dog. There was blood on her hands and on her legs and the ex-marine felt something stir on his chest at the sight of red against her skin. The color didn’t belong there, not on her.

The two of the realized at the same time that she wasn’t wearing her gloves.

Her eyes filled with fright and panic as she pulled her arms slightly into herself and Frank couldn’t help but try and see what she was hiding. He barely caught a glimpse before looking away as Charlie started to have trouble breathing. “Hey, if you need me to go, I’ll go.”

Charlie was already getting up. “There’s dog food in that cabinet. I’ll just… I’ll just be right back.”

Blue and black hair were a blur as Charlie raced to the bathroom, her hand snatching a black article of clothing as she closed the door behind her. She leaned back against the door and sucked in deep breaths of air before pushing away from the door with shaking limbs. Charlie had an extra inhaler in her mirror cabinet, and she brought it to her lips, sucking the medication in; doctor’s orders for the right dose be damned. It did take a few minutes of shallow breaths, a tight chest, a mouth full of a bad taste, and shaking hands before the meds finally kicked in; leaving her feeling exhausted and shaky. She slowly pulled her shirt off to pull the long sleeve shirt she had snatched up on before taking a deep breath, wincing as she opened the door.

The pit was eating food out of Frank’s hand and its tail started to wag when it saw her. She smiled as the hand that held the food dipped into the food bag for another handful, but Charlie realized that Frank wasn’t looking at the dog or her.

He was looking at her TV and she followed his stare.

The news was still on, and it was talking about a massacre not far from where her apartment was. She was silent as she walked the few steps to stand next to the pup as her eyes were glued on to the TV. The reporter was saying it was the Irish mob that was hit, and that the MO was the same as all the other gang killings. They were saying that it looked like an army had taken them on, but Charlie Rae knew it wasn’t.

It was starting to come together.

A marine.

The way he carried himself.

The heavy duffel bag he seemed to carry everywhere.

Showing up just minutes after the gunshots were fired.

And now the pup with the brand of the Irish mob on the inside of its legs.

“You’re them, aren’t you?”

Frank tensed and Charlie looked down at him as he slowly turned to stare up at her. She played with the hem of her right sleeve. “The army they’re talking about.”

Frank didn’t reply, just stared up at her, and she stared back; the silence all the answer she was needing.

Chapter Text

The tension was so thick that Charlie envisioned cutting it with a knife.

Frank slowly stood up, his knees cracking as he did, and Charlie swallowed thickly. He had the stance of a man that was ready to run, to bolt away from danger, and Charlie Rae held up a hand. “I’m not gonna turn you in, if that means anything to you.”

“And why wouldn’t you do that?”

The man in front of her had the look of skepticism on his face. His lips were pressed in a firm line and his eyes were narrowed with his brow furrowed. He had no reason to trust her, and she had no reason to trust him but a stirring in Charlie’s chest wanted him to do that; to trust her with this secret of his.

“Hell’s Kitchen has gone downhill during the last few years. It’s been overrun with gangs and mobs and just horrible people in general; people that the police can’t get to. The Devil started making a difference but the monsters he puts away always get out. And they’ll keep getting out because the police have nothing on them. But what you do, you make a difference. Because they’ll never come back to haunt Hell’s Kitchen ever again. And I don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish, whether it’s a vendetta or if you’re really trying to make a difference but whatever it is, it helps around here. Even if you never meant to.”

Frank was quiet as she talked, and Charlie bit her lip as she tugged at her sleeves. The pup on the floor whined as its tail flopped on the floor and Charlie saw Duchess and Shadow peak their heads out from their hiding place underneath her bed.

Sniffing and running a hand over his face, Frank looked down at the floor and then back up at her. “Why did you guess it was me?”

Charlie let out a breathless laugh. “Believe it or not, it was the dog.”

“The dog?”

She nodded in response to Frank’s question. “Once the Irish are done with a dog, they usually leave it to die in an alley. People will sometimes bring them in and they’re on the verge of death most of the time. They brand their dogs on their hind legs and I felt it on the inside of his right.”

Charlie motioned to the TV. “And seeing that’s the Irish that were hit, I took a guess.”

Frank looked at the dog and then looked back at her, a young woman he had no business affiliating with. A girl who was your basic civilian, working a job, paying her bills and living alone with cats. Frank knew she had secrets and demons; ones that seemed to be in plain sight and haunted her daily.

But he shouldn’t be here.

He shouldn’t have come to her.

He shouldn’t be around her.

“Frank?”

He looked at her and he didn’t know what to think. For the first time, in a long time if he was honest with himself, he didn’t know what to say. All he could do was stare at her.

Her brown orbs held a look he couldn’t describe. They were dark but bright and he could see that she had streaks of black mixing with the brown. Her face was filled with curiousness but also a trained sense of understanding. He hadn’t known her long, hell he really didn’t know her at all. But he knew one thing that he was absolutely certain about.

Her eyes reminded him of his wife’s.

“Um, I’m sorry, Charlie Rae. I shouldn’t have bothered you. I should go-”

“Frank.”

He stopped in his steps, the pit getting up to follow him, but he couldn’t move when he heard her voice.

“It’s okay. I really mean it when I say I won’t turn you in.”

Frank turned to Charlie again and her breath caught in her throat. His face was void of emotions and he had trained his eyes on her, studying her. She couldn’t move even if she wanted to, and she wasn’t sure if she even should.

Why?

Why didn’t she want him to go?

Why did she want him to stay with her?

She wasn’t one to stop people from leaving, she often encouraged them to. But with Frank Castle, the man who she had pieced together was the one who all of Hell’s Kitchen was looking for, she didn’t want him to walk out that door and never see him again. She felt something and it wasn’t anything like she had felt before.

Her mom used to tell her that when she met her dad that she just felt like he was supposed to be at her side. She never wanted to leave his and that she wanted to know his demons and let him know hers.

But Charlie knew it was stupid and immature to think that was what she was feeling now.

“Charlie Rae, you shouldn’t be around me. I shouldn’t be here. You’ll just get into trouble.”

Charlie let out a laugh. “I’m a big girl, Frank. I can take care of myself. And I’m pretty sure that being around you isn’t going to kill me. Believe me, if I haven’t died from my stupid decisions yet, I’m not going to by asking you to just calm down and breathe for a few minutes.”

She breathed in and Frank’s eyes narrowed. “Though I will say it’s not a good idea to stay here so close to where the police are.”

Frank nodded and gathered up the end of the rope that was still attached to the dog who stood obediently between them; it’s tail slowly wagging with its eyes trained on Frank. He slowly started to make his way towards the door before her voice stopped him again.

“Take the dog food. You’re going to need it more than I do.”

She watched him backtrack and pick up the bag of food like it weighed nothing. With the dog obediently following by his side, Frank Castle opened her door and slipped out into the night. She caught his eyes for a second before the door closed.

With a shaky gasp, she slowly lowered herself to the floor; the news still playing in the background as Duchess and Shadow slowly crawled out from their hiding place after a few minutes. She felt them rub against her as she sat on the floor staring at the door.

What was Frank thinking right now as he walked away from her?

What did he think about her now?

She shouldn’t have said anything; shouldn’t have blurted out the question if he was the one behind the killings. He had every right to never see her again, never show his face around her. In all honesty, it would be the most logical thing to do; never letting someone who knew see you again. She honestly wouldn’t blame him if he was thinking about getting rid of her in a quite manner. Lord knows she wouldn’t try to fight him since it would be her fault.

And yet-

She somehow knew he would never do that.

She was an innocent and from the reports of all the killings, he only ever went after those who weren’t. No innocent was ever harmed in the killings, and she doubted that he ever would harm on; he’d probably never forgive himself if he did. He seemed to have standards for himself, morals that he would rather die before he broke.

Charlie Rae shakily pushed herself off the floor and turned the TV off. She slowly locked her door before turning off the lights and making her way to her bed. Once she was under the covers, she let out a shaky breath as she felt Shadow and Duchess jump onto the bed to find a place to curl up.

She stared at the wall opposite of her until her eyes grew heavy and she finally closed them.

The media determined that whoever was behind the killings was evil for doing this. Perhaps Frank thought along those same lines.

But Charlie wasn’t scared at all.

She had met the Devil before and stared him in the eyes.

And as her nightmares came to her like they always did, she knew she’d prefer Frank standing before her over them.

Chapter Text

Frank kept a low profile after his surprise visit with Charlie.

She hadn’t seen him or the dog for a few days and she honestly hoped he was doing alright. It was a bit of a stretch, but she had come to look forward to their random meetings and run ins. Frank Castle was unlike any man she had every met and was definitely more handsome than all her exes.

Charlie Rae shook her head at that thought.

She was getting way too ahead of herself.

Because the fact was, like a schoolgirl, Charlie had developed a crush on a certain military man. Frank was always so sweet to her and was definitely not counting on her to give him something in return. She had dealt with many people like that, and all her exes expected her to give them sex or something in return. But Frank-

Frank seemed to enjoy her company.

Or at least, Charlie hoped he did.

-------------------------------------------------------

She was on her way home from her shift a couple of weeks after his last visit, to get the dogs stitches out, when it happened.

The day had been long, and it was around one in the morning when she was finally able to step outside of the clinic. There were no cabs in the area at the time and it was a route that she had taken for so long that she felt comfortable no matter the time of night or day; Frank cleaning up the streets also made her feel more at ease and she didn’t give a second thought when she started her way home.

A hand around her mouth told her that she should have been more vigilant.

She fought against the person and managed to bite their hand to uncover her mouth long enough for her to –

“Frank!”

It was the only and first name to pop into her head. She was far enough away from the clinic that no one would hear her, but she wasn’t close enough to her apartment for Al to come to her rescue.

“Frank!”

Her would be kidnapper grabbed a hold of her bag and she wiggled the strap from her shoulder. She started running down the street before another pair of hands grabbed at her and a van pulled up.

“Frank!”

Charlie Rae was shoved into the van and a gross smelling rag was placed over her mouth before she slipped into unconsciousness. The van sped away from the location in a heartbeat and all that was left of the encounter was a black bag on the sidewalk.

Frank had taken Max out and had put him away before he left for his rounds.

Charlie Rae was working late tonight, and he wouldn’t say it, but he had learned her schedule so that he knew which nights he needed to be out and about. He didn’t like the thought of her being out alone when someone could come along and do something to her. She didn’t deserve that, and he was certain that she had way more trauma happen to her than she let on. He had barely gotten a glimpse of her arms that night and what he did see made his heart clench.

“Frank!”

His blood ran cold, and he stopped in his tracks.

He would swear that the voice that just called out to him sounded like his dead wife but that wasn’t possible. She was gone and the only other person to know his identity was-

“Frank!”

He burst out into a run, his boots hitting the concrete with loud thuds. The voice was Charlie and there was no reason for her at all to say his name unless she was in trouble. And God, he hoped he could get to her in time.

“Frank!”

He pushed himself to go faster as the desperation in her voice seeped deep into his bones and he clenched the rifle in his hands. He heard the screech of wheels and burst through an alley way to see a black van turn a corner; a man across the street bending over to pick up a black bag.

A black bag that looked like every other black bag, but Frank knew it was Charlie Rae’s.

He ran faster than he ever had and rammed into the man, successfully knocking him over before pulling a pistol out to aim at his head.

“I swear to God Almighty, that if you don’t tell me what the fuck happened out here, I will blow your brains out.”

The man beneath him squirmed and tried to gain the upper hand but Frank’s adrenaline was high; every second was a second too late for Charlie.

He pressed the gun into the man’s forehead harder.

“Last fucking chance.”

Don’t dissociate.

Don’t dissociate.

Stay with the present.

Your name is Charlie Rae.

You were just kidnapped.

Frank is going to come for you.

Frank is going to come for you.

I’m so sorry, Frank.

I can’t think.

My brain is shutting down.

I’m dissociating.

Please come for me.

Chapter Text

Charlie could still remember the first time she dissociated.

It felt like someone had thrown her in water. An icy cold chill had overtaken her body and there a pressure in her lungs. She couldn’t hear at all like she had swimmer’s ear and her sense of smell was gone too. It was like she was just drowning, drowning in a huge ocean until somebody pulled her out and then all the bad things came rushing back in an instance that would send her into an asthma attack. Sometimes she would dissociate for a few seconds, sometimes a few hours. Her doctor had told her that her brain was trying to shield her from the bad things happening to her because her mind couldn’t take it.

Whatever it was, sometimes she was grateful for it.

Like now.

She knew she was moving but her legs felt sluggish. Unknown to her, the men that took her were basically dragging her through a concrete structure, it dimly lit with a buzzing in the air. They brought her to a door and opened it where several women shrieked as they did. Throwing Charlie in, they closed the door behind her, and she just laid on the floor, unmoving.

She couldn’t move if she wanted to, dissociating meant she was numb to the outside world and her own body.

One of the women, a girl probably around Charlie’s age, slowly put a hand on her shoulder but Charlie didn’t even budge. They whispered around her, wondering if she was dead, but one of the girls said she wasn’t as her chest was moving and she had a pulse. They gently propped her up against the wall and one of the women felt her forehead. They couldn’t know what was going on with her and Charlie couldn’t tell them.

Charlie couldn’t do anything.

But she was supposed to remember something, someone. She had screamed before she was taken, yes? There was a name, a name that was supposed to come save her. Thinking hurt so why would she continue to think? Not thinking and allowing her senses to dull felt better, there was less noise.

But there was still that name.

--------------------------------------------

Frank Castle is a man of little words.

He talks better with his fist or a gun than he does his mouth which he’d been told before would get him in trouble. Back in his school days, he got into so many fights over the stupidest of things and his momma always gave him a talking to. He had so much anger growing up that going into the marines was just another outlet, but he found a family in it. Not even Maria and the kids knew how much violence he always carried with him.

And shit, if he wasn’t using all the rage inside of him.

Frank had questioned the man that had seen the van take Charlie and maybe yeah, he ued his fists and his gun to get what he needed. Because Charlie, sweet, innocent Charlie, was out there having God knows what done to her. She didn’t deserve it. Not her.

What he got out of the man made his blood run cold.

Charlie wasn’t the only female to go missing.

Frank honestly felt stupid that he hadn’t been noticing what was going on before. He was too busy wiping out the thugs of the area that he hadn’t noticed that women were being taken off the street. There could only be a few reasons and none of them good.

Sex trafficking or prostitution.

And nobody, fucking nobody, should be forced to do anything that they didn’t want.

He had to use his big, dumb brain to think of places where they could stash away women where no one would find them. He had to remember all the gangs he took down, all the information he got from them about the area and the different thugs that lived here. The best bet would be an abandoned district of warehouses on the river. It’d have a quick water getaway, and no one really went out there unless they were doing something illegal.

It wasn’t much but Charlie was running out of time.

It honestly didn’t take long for him to find the area after he had hijacked car.

It did take him some time to scout the area and pinpoint the location of the van that took Charlie, but he had found it.

And now it was time to go get her.

-----------------------------------------------

Charlie could tell there was a hand petting her but that was about it.

It was still all fuzzy and dull and her body eventually got used to the chill that she had felt before. There was talking going on around her, but it was faint, so faint, and she tried to come back to reality without success.

Because there was something.

She had screamed something, and she couldn’t remember it. Had it been good or bad? Was it going to come for her?

There was movement all around her and she felt someone hold her close as if to shield her. Why was someone doing that? What was going on?

There was something she had said before the blackness, something important.

Gunfire was coming from outside the room the women were kept and some of them shrieked. A couple of them had gotten concerned over Charlie and had taken to forming a circle around her but she wasn’t responding to anything they did. Her eyes were dull and lifeless, and her breathing was calm, way too calm to be normal. One of them stroked her head and clutched her close as the gunfire and yelling became louder.

A name. It had been a name she had called out to.

Something smacked into the door of the tiny room, and they all shrieked while clutching to each other.

What was the name?

The door swung open and one of the women screamed as a figure approached the door.

Frank held up his hands in a non-threatening manner and knelt down. “I’m not here to hurt you. But you need to get out of here as fast as you can.”

He searched dimly lit room and his eyes met Charlie the same time hers widened and she looked up.

Frank.

She coughed loudly and hunched over, pounding her chest as if she couldn’t breathe. The women next to her were concerned and started fussing over her but she couldn’t hear them. She couldn’t fucking breathe, and she didn’t have her inhaler with her, but it was all okay now because Frank was there. She had called for him and he had come, and she was going to be alright as long as she could breathe again.

She gulped in some air as the man quietly rushed forward. He took her in his arms, and he could see the concerned looks on the faces of the women who had been “caring” for her. “I got her.”

They hesitated and looked at each other, not sure if they should leave Charlie with this man, but they didn’t have a choice as he picked her up and carried her out of the room. He quickly made it back to the truck he had hijacked as he listened to her continue to struggle breathing. Her bag was in the car, and he pulled them both inside, her back to his chest as he rummaged through her bag for her inhaler.

“Come on, Charlie. Breath with me. In and out. In. Out. You can do it, girl, I know you can. Come on, Charlie. Breathe.”

As soon as he gripped the inhaler, he brought it to her mouth and her hands wrapped around his, holding the little device close as the sound of hissing filled the air.

And Frank didn’t know what to do so he talked.

“You asked what my vendetta against those bastards was, right? Truth is, it’s all for revenge. You see, I had a wife and we had two kids, two of the best damn kids anyone could ever ask for. My girl, Lisa, and son, Frank, were good kids and Maria was a damn good woman. You remind me of her, you both had this fire inside of you. I had just gotten home from tour, Charlie. I took them to their favorite spot, that carousel that you seem to like, and all hell broke loose.”

Charlie wasn’t use to coming out of a dissociative episode as suddenly as she did and she was having a hard time grasping onto reality. But when Frank picked her up, she wrapped her fingers in his jacket and tried to breathe in his scent because Frank had a scent that made you think everything was okay and that’s what Charlie needed. When he wrapped her up in his embrace and stuck her inhaler in her mouth, she could finally breathe. And when he started talking, she slowly but surely started to calm down.

And she listened.

“I don’t know what happened but there was gunfire. I was watching Lisa when she went down. Just dropped like one of her dolls. Maria and Frank were next and I have no clue what happened next but all of this shit I’m doing, I’m doing it for them. They didn’t deserve it, Charlie. They were innocent and I’m going to fucking kill all of those bastards that murdered my family.”

The two were silent for a few minutes, Charlie leaning back against Frank’s broad chest, matching her breathing to his, and thought about what he said. When she opened her mouth, all she could get out was a whisper. “I’m sorry, Frank.”

If he jolted with a start, she pretended not to notice as she winced from the pain from her lungs.

“It’s alright, Charlie Rae. You weren’t involved. You don’t have to be sorry.”

Charlie always hated silence.

“You want some coffee?”

Frank laughed and she liked his laugh. She liked him if she was honest. His laugh made her body move with his and she couldn’t help but start blushing.

“Let’s get you home first, Charlie. Then you can make me coffee.”

Chapter Text

Maybe he should have just dropped her off.

They arrived at Charlie’s apartment complex and Al wasn’t around, so Charlie invited Frank up to her apartment. He had waited on the couch, stiff as a board, while Charlie hopped in the shower to get herself clean, to get rid of the stench of the warehouse. She couldn’t believe what had happened tonight, not in a million years, but she really couldn’t believe that Frank had found her. It was all she could think about during her shower and getting the coffee ready, that and the story about his family. It tugged at her heart how much this man had gone through and what nightmares he must have about it.

Frank took the cup of coffee from Charlie as she passed him to sit on the couch. She brought her right leg up close to her chest and crossed the other one under it. Her eyes slipped closed as she rested her chin on her knee and he took a drink from the mug on his hand. He glanced down into the dark liquid; the taste of expensive coffee lingering on his taste buds. Charlie Rae didn’t look like someone who would pick coffee like this, and she certainly didn’t look like someone who would own a sky blue chair that sat in the room.

Frank sat his mug on the coffee table and situated himself to look at Charlie; her eyes already opened and trained on him.

“Tell me something, Charlie Rae. How does a girl like you end up in an apartment like this with coffee tasting like heaven and a blue chair in your living room?”

Charlie let out a breathless laugh. “Why do you wanna know?”

Frank got comfortable. “’Cause you know my story. Now I wanna hear yours.” He waved his hand. “Can’t I make small talk?”

Charlie shook her head and looked away from him. “I think I liked you better when you killed people instead of talked.”

Frank was silent and when Charlie looked back at him, she narrowed her eyes. “Fine. But I don’t want your damn sympathy.”

The man sitting next to her raised an eyebrow and she took a deep breath.

“My family had always lived here in Hell’s Kitchen; I was born at the hospital where my mom is at now. But she’s not my real mom. She adopted me when I was seventeen after fostering me for a year.” Frank tilted his head a bit and Charlie shook off the thought of how adorable it made him look. “My biological mom couldn’t have kids without going to fertility treatments so after her and my dad had my twin brother and I, they didn’t have anymore. But we were happy; at least that’s what I thought. My dad worked all the time, a big-time construction dealer, and it was hard on my mom ‘cause of the hours but she did her best. She would take us to the carousel in the park, like you did with your family. On my dad’s off days, we would all go and spend the whole day in the park. It would make my mom smile and I never saw my dad happier than when she smiled. He always tried to find reasons to do it; probably to make up for all the time he was at work. She was his world and my brother, and I were just happy that they were.”

Frank grabbed his mug of coffee and Charlie stared at the table.

“It was on our tenth birthday when it happened. My dad had told my mom that he had gotten that day off, but he did have to go in that morning to discuss some things with another contractor. He said to wait for him to get home before going to the park. It was stupid, really. We went to that park all the damn time, but it was where my brother and I wanted to spend our birthday, just like every year. I begged her to let us go early, that dad could meet up with us there, and my brother backed me up. Mom finally cracked and called my dad to leave him a message saying that we were heading over and to just meet us there.” Charlie swallowed hard. “It was on the way there that shit hit the fan. We were going through a green light when our car was hit. I don’t remember much; just the sounds of screaming and glass breaking and metal crunching. I remember feeling a lot of pain and seeing red, but I didn’t know where it was coming from, nor what had happened. It was only later I found out that the police were chasing an armed suspect and they blew the stop light, hitting our car. I woke up in the hospital to the sound of my dad yelling at everyone. My whole body hurt and was stiff. A nurse came in when the machines started to go berserk as I had an asthma attack and tried to calm me down. I tried telling her that I wanted my mom and my brother. It was later that week that they finally told me they had died. It was why my dad had been yelling. The car that hit us had completely crushed their side of the car and my mom died on the way to the hospital from her injuries; my brother dying later that day. I was alive because my side hadn’t been hit. And that’s when everything went to hell.”

Charlie took a deep breath, trying to hold back the tears, and Frank sat there, waiting patiently. This was something that Charlie needed to take at her own pace, and he was going to let her take her time.

“It started out after I came home from the hospital; with him telling me I was worthless, that I should have died that day too and that it was my fault that Caleb and mom were gone. At age ten, I didn’t fully understand but I started to believe him. I made sure I was alone at school, and I pushed my childhood friends away because I believed what he told me. And then he started to get drunk and hit me. Not in the way my mom used to discipline my brother and I but in an abuse type of hit; well, you know what I mean. He was smart and made sure to never hit my face or leave anything on my arms. But I guess that wasn’t really enough for him.”

Charlie started to feel her body grow numb and she tried to stop talking; a fog spreading throughout her mind. She didn’t want to tell the rest of her past to Frank, it was too painful, but she had opened the flood gates. And now the words wouldn’t stop.

“He got really drunk one night, more so than usual, and he came into my room; cursing me and God and anyone who came to mind. He hit my face and I knew that this time it was gonna be different. I kept begging him to stop and that I was sorry, but he didn’t hear me or he chose to ignore me.”

Frank watched as the color drained from Charlie’s face and he slowly moved to put the now empty mug down.

“My dad raped me that night.”

Frank’s fists clenched and he quietly sat the mug down before he broke it.

“That’s when the next level of hell started. He kept doing it when he was shit faced drunk and I soon stopped begging him to stop. I became numb and I zoned out; coming back only when it was over and having an attack as soon as I realized what had happened. I was told later that it was some type of disassociation disorder; that my mind couldn’t handle what was happening and tried to shut everything out for my protection. It escalated from zoning out during the rapes to shutting out when anything happened. And then he started to take me to his ‘work’. It’s where I found out what he really did. He was in a mob, not a construction contractor. My mom never knew either. But he started to take me with him, saying that I was a new toy. He never told them I was his daughter and I never said anything about it; I was too scared. He let them all have turns with me.”

Charlie blinked slowly as she talked, almost as if she was in a trance. “Only one of them didn’t join in. He was the youngest, probably barely into his twenties, and he was the one who did all the odd jobs of running around to pick up their shit. They didn’t care that he didn’t join in and so he used to take care of me; clean me up afterwards. It was always with him that I would snap out of out of whatever state my mind was in and have an attack. I almost died a few times when I couldn’t give enough air. No one really gave a shit, but they couldn’t have me dying or else they’d have to explain to the police. It was a few months after I turned twelve that the police actually came. I was in the back and the guy came rushing in as soon as the gunshots started. He was trying to calm me down when the cops barged in. He backed off and put his hands behind his head and told them that they needed to take me to the hospital right then and there. An officer carried me out and I saw that my dad and his gang had decided to shoot at the police, resulting in a shootout. The officer covered my eyes, but I knew that everyone was dead. The kid gave detailed description of everything that the gang did and what they did to me. I don’t know what happened to him. But me, I was put in the foster care system. My parents were the only kids in their families and all my grandparents had died long ago. So, the state put me in a foster family. By the time I started to live with them, my mom had gotten a hold of my files and she kept tabs on me. She was a lawyer, a good one, hence all the expensive coffee and blue chair and apartment. She could get her hands on just about anything and she never knew why I kept crawling back into her mind, but I did.”

Charlie took a deep breath and feeling came back to her limbs; the fogginess in her mind disappearing. Frank watched her closely, the tenseness never leaving his limbs as he waited for her to continue. He knew her story was not done yet.

Chapter Text

Charlie looked at Frank for the first time since she started her story.

“I was put into seven different foster families and went to juvie seven times in four years.”

Frank furrowed his brows at her, and she shook her head. “I was fine as long as the families mostly left me alone, but they never did. Each family sent me to a different shrink, a different school and tried to get me to interact with them. I didn’t want any of that. There were too many feelings, too many rules and they tried to help me when all I wanted was space. I started hanging with the wrong crowd, even at twelve. It was all petty stuff we did. Vandalized government property with graffiti, trespassed onto private property, underaged drinking and drugs. I never did the drugs though, was just around the people who did, but I was always caught with them, so I was charged.” She let out a breathless chuckle. “It was stupid really. Every family left me in there for a few months before the state paid them a fee to bail me out. And after every release, I was sent to a new family where it would start all over again. Until mom came along. She had gone through the requirements to take on a foster kid and she asked the state if I could be that kid.”

She shook her head. “I thought that after a record like mine, the state wouldn’t let anyone else take me, but they let her. From the moment I met her, I knew that this lady was different. She brought me here, brought me home, and laid out the basic of all rules. Clean up after yourself. Do your schoolwork and homework. Be home by this time. Ya know, stuff like that. And something just clicked in my mind; something right for a change. She gave me the option of being homeschooled or going to public and I chose to be at home. She was able to work from home as well and she helped me when I needed it, or I’d go with her to her office. I was given the choice of which shrink to go to when I was ready. She treated me differently than anyone else did. I realized after a few months of living with her that she reminded me of my actual mom. I broke down crying when I realized it and she just sat there holding me.”

Charlie looked at Frank. “More coffee?” He nodded his head and she slowly got up as if she had a cramp in her leg. Grabbing the mug, he held it while she filled it up and waited for her to sit down again.

“It was on my seventeenth birthday that she came home with an adoption forum. She handed it to me and told me she wanted to be my mom; she wanted to be the one that I could always come to if I was in trouble or needed help or just needed someone to talk to. We went to the courthouse that day to finalize it. After I graduated high school, she helped me get into a college program to become a veterinary assistant. I became certified a year later and started working at the animal clinic. But then everything went to shit again when she became diagnosed with pancreatic cancer about a year ago.” She took a deep breath. “And now we’re here and I’m gonna lose one of the best things that has happened to me in a while.”

Charlie lightly clapped her hands together. “And that’s all, folks.”

“No, it’s not.”

Doe-like eyes snapped up to look at Frank. “What do you mean?”

Setting down his coffee, Frank leaned forward. “That’s not the end of it. There’s something more to it and I bet it’s something that you don’t tell people at all.”

Charlie narrowed her eyes, cursing this man in her mind. She liked that he was very straightforward and took no shit but right now, she hated it. “So what?”

Frank laughed. “You know my story, sweetheart. You know what I do, what I’ve done. And I know that your story isn’t done.” His eyes flickered from her gloves back to her eyes and her face crumbled. She bit her lip and very, very slowly, worked her gloves off.

Scars littered her arms, small ones, big ones, long ones, all sizes of scars. She held them out towards him; her voice quiet and timid as she spoke. “It was after I went to the first family that I started. My dad had broken me in more ways than one and everything was too much.”

Frank took her forearms in his gun calloused hands, hands that had killed people, and gently ran his thumbs over the pale, scarred skin. The goosebumps that ran up her arms didn’t go unnoticed by him, nor did the wince she did when he grasped them. “Did you ever...”

“Try and kill myself? Yeah.”

Her eyes traced the pink and silver lines as she spoke to him. “Every time I got out of juvie; I would try. I came so, so close a few times but each time, I woke up in that damn hospital bed. A person from the Child Services and from the foster care system would be there; telling me that they had a new family for me.”

Charlie glanced up at Frank’s face for a second and quickly back down. She had never seen anyone look at her scars the way he did, not even her past boyfriends. They had never asked her to take her gloves off; they would actually hand them back to her as a silent gesture to cover them. “I stopped all together when I came to mom.”

The look Frank had on his face was one of rage, hurt and something else that Charlie couldn’t quite pin down.

Frank continued to hold her arms in a gentle grip. He would burn the world just to see his kids again and be able to hold them in his arms. The fact that Charlie’s dad - fuck he didn’t even deserve that title - hurt and raped his daughter was enough to send him into a rage. But for Charlie to believe all he accused her of and send her into her hurting herself like this made him so pissed. And it made his heart clench so hard it hurt. She didn’t want sympathy from him, and it was evident that she closed herself off to everyone except a few people for that reason; and probably more.

“Charlie Rae-”

“Don’t.”

He barked out a laugh. “Don’t what?”

He looked at her and she had this expression on her face, like she wasn’t so sure she was supposed to be on earth. Frank narrowed his eyes at her. “Are you afraid to tell people how you feel because you think it will destroy them? So, you bury it deep inside yourself where it destroys you?”

Charlie bit her trembling lip as if to make it stop and tugged her arms out of his hands. His eyes softened, loosening his grip and watching her hug her arms to her chest. “You’re a survivor, Charlie Rae. It’s written all over your body.”

Her eyes flickered to his and then away.

She looked like a person who regret every single word that just came out of her mouth; like the happiness she just had was snuffed out.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Frank tentatively reached for her arms again. She let him take them back in his hands and he looked closely at them while she stared at the ground. A soft purring sound reached their ears as Duchess and Shadow sensed her discomfort and climbed into her lap. She pulled one of her arms away to pet them and her eyes lazily drooped.

“Why do you stay when almost everyone else runs?”

Frank frowned, his right thumb gently brushing along one of the silver scars, before he looked back up at Charlie. “Maybe it’s because you stayed when you know I have blood on my hands.”

He gently took her chin in his hands and made her look at him; tears glistening in those brown orbs that recently have meant safety to him. They searched his own and they sat in silence for a few seconds; save for the sound of the purring cats.

“Because you’re as broken as I am and I’m not about to let you fall.”

Chapter Text

“Because you’re as broken as I am and I’m not about to let you fall.”

Charlie would be ashamed to admit it but after the day she had had with the kidnapping, her dissociative episode and telling her story to Frank after hearing his, it absolutely broke her.

She curled in around herself and she choked on a sob, the tears breaking free.

Fuck, what could have happened tonight if Frank hadn’t found her? She would never have seen her mom again nor would Daisy had known what had happened to her. God only knows what horrors might have been inflicted upon her if they had shipped the women out before Frank could get there. Would he had searched for her? Would he had tracked down the men that took her and tried to get her back?

It was truly wishful thinking and Charlie assumed she might have been dead before he had the chance. Between her asthma and dissociation, they might have put her out of her misery and ended her life that she tried so desperately to do when she was younger.

Frank watched her begin to cry and he gently pulled her towards him. She hesitated at first but then all but collapsed into him. He gently gripped her and brought her closer to him as sobs wracked her body.

“It’s okay. It’s me. You’re safe, Charlie. You’re safe.”

He held her close as if he could chase away all the demons of her mind.

“Why? Why can I talk to you about this shit? Why do I feel so safe with you?”

Frank let out a breathless laugh. “Beats me. I only manage to scare people away. People get hurt around me, Charlie Rae. I can’t let that happen to you.”

Charlie sat up abruptly, her cheeks stained with fresh tears, and sniffed violently. “You can’t leave because you’re scared of me getting hurt, Frank. I get hurt no matter what because that’s how it is. If you think disappearing is going to make a difference well then you’re an asshole.”

He tried not to laugh; Frank really tried. Charlie’s hair was still wet from the shower and her blue was fading. Her doe eyes were red rimmed, and tears still leaked from them. Her nose was red too and she kept sniffling while her bottom lip trembled. He couldn’t help but chuckle when she hiccupped.

“Charlie. I’m a monster. I’ve killed people. I’m going to keep killing people. No one is going to just accept the fact that I’ve vanished from the area, they’re going to continue to look for me. I can’t put you in danger. That would hurt me.”

Frank never really thought he’d care for someone after Maria. She was the love of his life, and he loved the life that he had built with her. It was why he was doing what he was doing. But Charlie, he never imagined he’d meet someone like Charlie.

Charlie was special. She was like Maria in a lot of ways. They had the same eyes and they both didn’t take shit from anyone, less of all him. But they had a certain air about them that just made them attractive to be around.

He couldn’t bring Maria back and Charlie was here, but he couldn’t give her what she wanted from him, what she needed. He was not the best choice for her.

“If you say anything else, I swear to fucking God I will hit you.”

Charlie had crossed her arms over her chest, her tears had now stopped but she was plagued with the hiccups. She could read people like no other and she saw the gears turning in Frank’s head, in his eyes. Sighing, she brought her legs up and wrapped her arms around them.

“Look, Frank, I understand that you’re going through shit. I can imagine how hard it is for you to lose your family and that you still need time to figure out your head. I’m not forcing things on you; I’m just asking you not to push me away all of the sudden.”

Frank flicked her forehead and she scowled at him.

God, he was just relieved he got to her in time and that hadn’t even been more than 4 hours ago.

“You, Frank Castle, seem to take the world onto your shoulders. You think everyone would be fine without you. But even though it’s only been a few months, I’ve grown fond of our weird interactions. Hell, I just told you my life story! I don’t tell just anyone that, not even my past boyfriends knew what my dad had done.”

Frank wasn’t sure how he felt about her having boyfriends.

“You going sweet on me, Charlie Rae?”

She laughed at his words, echoing her own when they met again at the diner after their first meeting. “You’re an idiot.”

He knew that look on her face, in her eyes. He had seen it with Maria – fuck, their eyes were so alike – and he didn’t know if he could handle another incident. Not now, not when he was so close to avenging his family.

“I can’t, Charlie. I can’t give you what you’re looking for.”

“You know, you’ve looked at me a little too long to ‘not have any feelings for me’.”

What the fuck was he supposed to say to that?

Why? Why did it have to be her? Why did Charlie have to be so like Maria and yet so different? Why did she have to come into his life at a time where all he knew was war and chaos? It used to be different, he used to be able to leave war behind him when he came home but since that day, war has followed him. And here she was, standing in the middle of all the rubble like a beacon to come home to.

His family used to be his beacon.

Why did it now have to be her?

“Look, Charlie, I can’t do this right now. I cannot have you get in the way of whatever the fuck this is because you want someone to take away your pain. I’m not going to be an outlet for you. I can’t give you what you need.”

They stared at each other, dark brown orbs staring into his, and Charlie furrowed her brows. “I didn’t fucking say anything of the sort, dipshit. I just stated what I see now, in front of me. And for your fucking information, I didn’t say you had to choose right this very instant. I’m not made of glass, Frank, but I also know I’m fucked up- “

Frank looked angry almost. “It has nothing to do with you being fucked up.”

“Don’t interrupt, it’s rude.”

Did he honestly have feelings for this girl or was it a phase?

Charlie grinned cheekily at him, and he decided no, it wasn’t a phase.

“I didn’t mean to say anything that was uncomfortable to you. You seemed like the type of guy who doesn’t beat around the bush, so I decided to tell you how I see it. I like you, Frank Castle, a lot but I’m not saying it to hear it said back to me. I’m not that stupid.”

He wanted to take her in his arms again. She was small enough to fit against him, but she was also tall enough to reach things in her cupboards. He probably had a good few inches on her and it made her look up at him from under her eyelashes and he was really smitten with her, fuck.

He was jostled out of his thoughts by her pressing herself into him, his arms immediately circling around her. The only noise in the apartment was the muffled noises coming from the outside and the air conditioning running. He could feel her breathing against him and Frank rested his head on top of hers.

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes before Frank noticed how much she was leaning against him. With silent precision he only learned through the military, he moved to look down at Charlie’s face. Her lashes were brushing against her cheeks and her breathing had evened out in a way that only meant that she was sleeping. He quietly and carefully rolled her onto him and hooked one of his arms under her knees and stood, his knees cracking as he did. Her head rolled against his shoulders, and he stood still, hoping he didn’t wake her up. He figured that she didn’t fall asleep around just anyone and a warmth bloomed in his chest at the thought. She sighed in her sleep and snuggled closer to his shoulder as he walked her to the bed in the corner. Slowly and with a great amount of patience, he set her down on the bed and tucked her hair behind her ear. He grabbed the blanket at the end of the bed and laid it over her, Charlie twitching slightly but not waking up. Looking over at her cats that were still on the couch, Frank put a finger up to his lips. “Watch over her for me, okay?”

His only response was them blinking slowly at him and he made his way out of her apartment into the dead of night.

For the first time in she didn’t know how long, night terrors didn’t plague her sleep and she slept soundly until morning.

Chapter Text

Charlie called out of work the next day and asked for a few days off.

She didn’t go into details with Dr. Summers about what happened the night before but thankfully the vet knew when to push for information. Charlie did, however, make an appointment with her therapist about it, a sweet woman named Krista Dumont. This was something the young woman knew she could not handle on her own and as much as she hated to ask for help from anyone, her therapist was a go to person to talk to. Because that’s all she needed to do was to talk about it.

Plus, she hadn’t seen her in a while.

Thankfully, Krista could see her that day. She headed out of her apartment not long after lunch and was thinking of what she said to Frank the previous night. Charlie spoke the truth when she said she wasn’t expecting anything out of Frank at the moment. The man had a lot on his plate, and she didn’t want to be the cause of him screwing up in any way, shape or form. He had to deal with the grief of losing his family and all that came with it. Charlie had been there at one point in time, but she thankfully had found ways to cope thanks to Krista.

Not that Frank could walk up to a therapist at any time and get therapy.

The thought of Frank Castle sitting in a fancy chair with a therapist almost made Charlie chuckle.

She soon arrived at her therapists’ office, and she made her way up to the room, knocking on the open door before going in.

Krista looked up with a smile as she closed the door. “Good afternoon, Charlotte Rae.”

She always used her full name and she hated it. “Hi, Krista.”

The petite, dark haired woman rearranged the notepad on her lap, a pen in between two of her fingers. “It’s been a long time.”

“I’m sorry. I’ve been busy with work.” Charlie grimaced at her own words.

“We talked about how work shouldn’t become a coping method, Charlotte. It’s good to stay busy but it’s not good if we don’t take breaks and allow ourselves to relax, especially in a profession like yours.”

Charlie sat down with a huff and placed her bag beside her. “I know.”

Krista hummed and wrote something on her pad. “How is your mom doing?”

Charlie had told Krista long ago when she first started to come to her to call Daisy ‘mom’. She called a couple of her foster parents’ ‘mother’ on a few occasions to test the word on her tongue and she absolutely hated it. It sounded and tasted sour and she just couldn’t bear to hear Daisy being called her mother. She was her mom, the person who loved and cared for her just as her real mom had done when she was still alive.

“She’s okay. Therapy helps with the pain, but I spoke with her doctor. I’m going to lose her, Krista. I’m going to lose my mom.”

Krista paused in her writing and looked up. “I’m very sorry, Charlotte. I know that’s not what you want to hear but- “

“But there’s nothing you can do, I know. There’s nothing anyone can do.” Charlie took a deep breath. “I know. Be positive and don’t use negative words.”

Krista smiled at her and waited for her to talk. “I guess I should be happy that she’s still alive. I can still see her and talk with her. It’s just not the same.”

They talked for a few moments more about her mom and Krista continued to write things down as Charlie was the main person to talk. That’s why she liked her therapist. She used a type of therapy that allowed Charlie to just talk and get it off her chest without having to worry about being judged or interrupted.

Charlie waited for Krista to stop writing before biting her lip. “I had an incident the other night.”

“What kind of incident?”

Taking a deep breath, Charlie reached down to her bag and rummaged around for her inhaler, Krista’s eyes watching her. “I was kidnapped.”

Her therapists’ dark eyes widened. “Do the police know about this?”

“Probably not unless one of the other people I was held with called it in. Please don’t write anything down, Krista. I don’t want others to know.”

“Charlotte Rae, this is a very serious matter. The police must know, and you know we have a patient confidentiality, they won’t know it was you.”

Charlie looked down at her gloved arms and ran a finger down the middle. “It won’t make a difference; the men are dead.”

Krista narrowed her eyes; the look made her feel like a teen all over again. “How do you know this? Were you conscience through it all? No dissociative episode?”

“Oh no, I dissociated. I don’t remember much, just feeling cold and everything was muffled. I remember someone touching me in a nonharmful way as if to wake me up but that’s about it. But I know the men are dead. There’s no other way we could have escaped.”

“Charlotte, how did you get back home?”

Charlie bit her lip. This was where she knew it was going to be difficult keeping Frank out of it. There was no way she could, and she was not going to outing him in the least bit, she promised she wouldn’t. This was where finesse took place.

“Some guy took me home.”

“Hm, just some guy? Perhaps the same man who dealt with the others?”

Charlie shrugged one shoulder. “Maybe, I don’t remember.”

Krista looked up from her notepad with a stern look. “Charlotte, I’m getting the sense that this is not the whole story. You know how we’ve talked about being honest with me or I can’t help you.”

“Krista, I don’t remember what happened. I was out of it; I don’t even remember how I got there or how I got out. Some guy helped me and thank God he was around or I wouldn’t be in front of you now.”

Don’t out Frank. Don’t out Frank.

Holding up her hands, the therapist sighed. “Alright. I won’t push. I know when to push with you and that part is something I won’t do. But how did you feel afterwards?”

This was the part she hated. Charlie hated talking about how she felt in those instances, it took her months to talk calmly about what her father did to Krista, and it still brought tears to her eyes.

“Dirty? I don’t think that’s the right word but it’s how I felt. Small. Feeble. Not in control. I felt like a failure.”

Krista wrote all of it down, just listening until she probed more. “Failure? Why?”

“Because I dissociated. I can’t do shit when it happens, and I have no control over it. It’s gotten better since I’ve been able to understand and pinpoint my triggers. But when a trigger pops up without warning, I have no control over it.” Charlie put her head in her hands. “I realized that I could have died, and no one would have known.”

“And that’s what scares you? Dying?”

Looking up, Charlie rested her arms on her knees. “I’m not scared of dying, per say. Personally, you can bury me with both my middle fingers up. I’m just scared of dying not on my own terms, which I know is unrealistic. I’m scared that I’d die, and mom wouldn’t know what happened to me.”

Krista wrote things down and Charlie sat up. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

“I think you should, Charlotte- “

Charlie needed to do something so she blurted out the first thing. “There’s a guy I like.”

There. A new topic to talk about. It’s not that Charlie hated talking about death, she’d just rather not talk about her death. It reminded her too much of her teen hood and how much shit she used to get into.

Krista also knew too.

“A guy, hm? Tell me about him.”

Well now that she needed to talk about him, she didn’t want to. Frank was like a secret she wanted to keep. She didn’t want anyone to fall for him like she had.

“He’s sweet. Thoughtful. He thinks about others before himself and he’d rather be hurt than you. He’s got a past, yeah, but who doesn’t? It scares him though and he’s afraid to get close to people because of it. But it doesn’t stop him from helping people. He’s got a good heart when it comes to people and animals. Once, he brought me a dog that needed help. He didn’t have to do it, could have dropped him off somewhere but he brought him to me because he knew I could help and would want to help. But he doesn’t want a relationship yet. His last one ended badly. And I’m okay with it. We’re both fucked up and I guess we need to unfuck ourselves in our own way before anything happens.”

Krista chuckled. “Sounds charming.”

“He is. He’s messy. I like messy people. People who don’t fit in a box or stay between the lines. But who’s integrity is greater than any rule book and who’s loyalty is stronger than blood. That’s the kind of man he is.”

Her therapist hadn’t written any of what she said down, hadn’t taken on note since she started blabbing about her liking for Frank. “You really like him don’t you.”

“He’s the first person who I’d call if things go wrong. He’s the first person who comes to mind in the morning. I know that a relationship might not happen and that’s okay with me too. I just want him in my life. I don’t want him to ever leave.”

“You know that’s not a good way of thinking.”

“I know. But I’m human, right? Can’t we all have our delusions?”

Chapter Text

Charlie always felt lighter and more grateful after a therapy session, despite how much she hated them.

She also felt better after talking about Frank. She didn’t mention him by name or really gave anything away that would out him which she felt pretty good about. She and Krista had discussed her crush a little more before diving into her anxiety and depression, how they affected her life. It was a good session and Charlie promised that she would schedule soon, though it was probably a lie.

She’d schedule when she needed to talk and not a moment before.

She couldn’t face her mom just yet and hoped that her mom would brush it off as her being busy. Knowing she could have passed without seeing Daisy again really fucked her up and even though she wanted to see her, she knew she’d cry if she did.

Sighing, she hailed a cab to go to the carousel.

It was stupid how the place made her feel calm. She remembered Caleb chasing her in the grass after a picnic or how they would ride the carousel until they got sick. It was a place to escape the world and pretend to be something other than you were.

She also liked it because it’s where she met Frank.

Breathing deeply after the cab dropped her off, she walked to the concession stand and ordered a blackberry slushie. Her mom never allowed her and Caleb to have some because of the sugar but it was something she affiliated with her mom now. They would always get slushies when they came here, Daisy knowing that she needed something familiar but then out of the normal.

Slurping the cold drink and coughing, she spotted a figure on a bench and made her way over. “Hey, Frank.”

The man jolted as if he had been in a trance and hadn’t seen her come up which he hadn’t. He watched her blink at him, slushie in hand as he gave her a slow once over. He’d still never get over the fact that her and Maria were so alike yet so different.

Especially in dress.

Maria liked to wear dresses, always been that way. She especially liked the vintage look and Frank liked that about her, like that she was something new in something old. But Charlie, she was the exact opposite of his dead wife. She was different than Maria in everything really but that’s what Frank liked about her. Because no one could take Maria’s place and Charlie didn’t seem like someone who would want to replace her but make her own place in his heart.

Maria had been the sun but Charlie was definitely the moon.

And Charlie may have blushed as she watched his eyes trail down her body.

“What’s up, Charlie Rae?”

The young woman shook her cup. “Slushies and therapy sessions. Mind if I sit?”

Frank motioned for her to, and she did, leaving space between them. She didn’t feel like he’d appreciate her coming on to him like she did last night. It was a new day, and she wasn’t hysterical like she was last night. Frank did, however, throw an arm across the back of the bench which she could feel his arm at her neck.

Frank scrunched his nose. “Therapy sessions, hm?”

Charlie hummed while taking a drink, clicking her tongue when she was done. “Yup. I needed to get what had happened last night off my chest to someone besides you. Not that you weren’t a good sport last night.”

“Good sport, huh?”

She turned to him, staring at his face until he looked her way. “I meant what I said, Frank. I’m not going to push you into something you’re not ready for. And I don’t want you assuming that you need to be something when I know you’re not. I have my shit to work out and you have your shit. That being said, you’re my friend and I’m going to treat you like one until you tell me otherwise. Got it?”

“Yes ma’am.”

Feeling triumphant, Charlie went back to slurping on her slushie and they sat in comfortable silence until she broke it, pointing off into a grassy area. “My brother puked right there one time.”

Frank raised an eyebrow but watched her closely. She had a fond expression on her face as she recalled the experience. “My mom, my real mom, never let us have slushies because of the sugar but for one of our birthdays, she did. Caleb drunk his so quickly and then hopped on the carousel. He got so fucking sick, he stumbled over to right there and puked everything up. Mom didn’t let us have any ever again after that.”

Charlie shook her head while laughing and then got quiet again. Frank sniffed and ran his free hand down his face. “Frank and Lisa loved the carousel like you and you brother did. They would always get excited when we would go, it was mostly when I got back from a tour. We would come here with a buddy of mine; he was like family.”

“Why do you come back now?”

Frank looked at Charlie. “The same reason as you probably. This was where we last saw them happy.”

Tears sprung in her eyes, and she looked away from Frank, not wanting him to see. He took the arm that was behind her neck and put it around her shoulders. “Hey, now, I didn’t mean to make you cry. Come on, Charlie Rae. Show me a smile, doll.”

Swallowing thickly, Charlie allowed a small smile to grace her face. “Doll? Never heard that one before. You sound like someone from Steve Rogers time.”

The two talked about Max and then everything and nothing for a little while before they sat in silence again, Charlie’s slushie long since finished and Frank feeling loose enough to throw his leg on top of the other.

“I never thanked you.”

Frank shook his head. “You don’t have to thank me, Charlie. I’m sorry I didn’t get to you fast enough.”

Doe eyes looked at him. “You got there before anything happened and you saved those girls too, not just me. You’re a good man, Frank, a good man that bad things have happened to.”

Frank looked away from her and then back. “You sure about that?”

“Sometimes you have to do bad things to get good results. When that happens, you often forget all the good you’ve done.”

He chuckled. “You turning into a shrink or something?”

Charlie pushed his arm away playfully and laughed.

He liked it when she laughed.

---------------------------------------

They had gone their separate ways after that.

She had headed home, and he went back to whatever hidey hole he put himself up in. Duchess and Shadow were happy she was home and they winded around her legs as she cooked herself some supper. She must have fallen asleep on the couch afterwards as she was woken up to the sound of knocking on the door.

Wiping away the sleep from her eyes, she opened it and her face fell when she noticed Max alongside two officers. Swallowing thickly, she offered a smile to hide her worry. “Can I help you, gentleman?”

“Excuse us for the intrusion, ma’am, but we were told this was your dog?”

Max looked like he was so excited to see her and jumped up on her. Charlie swallowed back tears and her throat threatened to close up as she pet him. “Yes, yes, it is. How did you guys find him?”

“We received a tip and found the dog. Someone said he was yours. We’re glad we could get him home safely to you.”

Please, let Frank be okay. Please, don’t say something happened to Frank.

“Thank you both so, so much. I was worried someone had gotten a hold of him for his breed. Thank you for bringing him home.”

“Yes ma’am, you take care now.”

Charlie brought Max inside and closed the door, falling to her knees and wrapping Max into a hug. She couldn’t stop the tears or sobs that escaped her, and she sat there for a while, hugging the dog as he wagged his tail at her.

Frank. Oh Frank.

She scrambled to the TV and turned it onto the news, but she knew. Oh, she knew.

Frank had fucked up.

Frank had been caught.

Frank was in some deep, deep shit.

“Charlie Rae, is everything okay?”

Practically running to her door with Max’s leash in hand, Charlie swung it open and fell into the waiting arms of Gram. She sobbed into the older woman while she rubbed circles into her back and Max waited patiently at their feet, his tail thumping the whole time.

“No, Gram. Nothing is okay.”

Chapter Text

Charlie cracked her eyes open to see the sun shining through the apartment.

She had stayed awake most of the night, crying to Gram and telling her what was happening. If there was anyone she could talk about Frank to, it was the old lady. The woman had lived in Hell’s Kitchen her life and had done some shady things while she was growing up. She just listened to Charlie cry and talk, occasionally handing her a clean tissue until Charlie had cried all she could.

It was honestly amazing she didn’t have an asthma attack.

Her eyes landed on Max resting at the foot of her bed and brought fresh tears to her eyes.

Frank had fucked up.

She didn’t know what to do or where to go to find out what happened to him. How could she? She was a civilian and now she realized why Frank was apprehensive to get near her. Getting close meant attachment and if something happened, like it did, it would end in heartbreak. And her heart ached to see him, to know that he was okay, but she couldn’t.

She didn’t know if he was dead or alive.

And yet, she somehow knew he was alive.

How else would Max have gotten to her? Sure, the cops knew who she was because of her time growing up but none of them knew where she lived currently unless they personally knew Daisy. Her mom had a relationship with the department because of her role as a lawyer but that was it. Frank was the only factor in this mystery that made sense.

Groaning, she stuffed her face into her pillow.

She needed to see her mom today.

Charlie soon got up to take the dog outside before getting on with her morning routine. The cats were apprehensive about this new addition to their home, but Max seemed to have learned his place during the night after a good swat from Duchess. After locating food for the dog, she went over to Gram to see about her taking out Max before she was on her way to the hospital.

When she got there, she felt like she entered one of those war shelters that you saw in movies.

There were cops everywhere and she had to squeeze past a few of them, but she was stopped right as soon as she entered the building. Several officers with rifles were in her way and one of them came forward. “All bags must be checked, and pat down is required.”

Charlie narrowed her eyes. “Something wrong, officer?”

“Sorry, ma’am. Standard procedure.”

She handed her bag to an officer and allowed herself to be frisked, her brows furrowed the entire time. When her inhaler was brought out, she let out a dry chuckle. “Never seen an asthmatic before, boys?”

She really needed to pick better times for her sarcasm.

The officers grunted and gave her back her bag before she continued down the hall to Daisy’s room. The woman was lying in bed, watching the news on TV when she arrived, and Charlie stopped cold.

Frank’s picture was on screen.

“Oh, Charlie! I was worried about you, baby. They picked up the man who had been doing all the gang killings. He’s here in this hospital, hence all the police presence.”

She barely heard her mom. She could barely breathe.

Frank had fucked up.

“Charlie?”

The young woman slowly turned to look at her mom. There was concern in Daisy’s eyes and her brows were furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

Slowly lowering herself into the chair beside the bed, Charlie shook her head and forced a smile, grabbing one of her mom’s hands. “Nothing. I was just taken back by how busy and out of place everything is. So, they caught the guy, huh?”

She didn’t want to talk about Frank. Frank was a good man; Charlie was sure of it. Yes, she knew murdering people was bad, it was illegal, but could she really find fault in what Frank was doing? Those men he killed were the worst of the worst, they were rapists and murders and traffickers and now they could no longer hurt anyone. Was she looking at it all wrong? Was there truly something wrong with her?

Was it wrong that Frank had blood on his hands and yet she felt the saftest when she was with him?

When was the last time she ever felt safe with anyone besides her mom?

“Charlie!”

She jolted out of her headspace to find her mom staring at her. “Charlie, what is going on?”

Again, Charlie shook her head and Daisy started getting upset. “Charlotte Rae, what has gotten into you? You know you can tell me things.”

“Not this time, mom. I don’t want you to have to hide things from people.”

The woman wore a tender look on her face and she squeezed Charlie’s hand. “Baby girl, right now, I’m just a woman fighting cancer in the hospital. I no longer work cases, and no one is going to come and talk about an active one with me, you know this. Please, Charlie, trust me.”

So, she did.

Her mom was dying anyway, and she didn’t want her mom to die with a secret between them.

So, very quietly, she told her mom about running into Frank at the carousel and how they would always run into each other. How she liked the conversations they had and the nice, silent coffee visits where they would sit and not talk. She told her mom about Frank finding his way to her apartment with Max and how she patched him up, finding out that he was the one behind the killings. But she wasn’t afraid because he never gave her a reason to. She even told her mom about her kidnapping; her going into a panic attack as she did which made her get out her inhaler. But that it was Frank who saved her, Frank who got her home safely and made sure she was put to bed before he left. It was Frank who she had fallen for this, this big, military man who she had no business being around and yet, fate had brought them together.

She didn’t love him, not yet, but shit, she could see herself loving him.

Daisy just sat and listened, and Charlie watched her mother’s face.

So many emotions were on the woman’s face, so many expressions. She lit up when she mentioned her meeting with Frank, grimaced when she talked about patching up Max and the conversation afterwards. There was pure horror, and relief on her face when she told o her kidnapping, tears in her eyes as she probably thought the same thing Charlie had.

But there was never any judgement or disgust for how she felt about the man.

“If I ever got to meet him, I’d shake his hand and offer my thanks not just for what he did for our country but for saving you.”

Charlie bit her lip. “Something must have happened, mom. He wouldn’t have fucked up for no reason.”

Daisy didn’t get to respond as a nurse walked in at that moment. Charlie focused her attention to what was going on outside the door than what her mother’s nurse was saying until it was made clear that Charlie needed to go, to let her mother rest.

She bent down to hug the woman and Daisy squeezed her tightly before whispering in her ear. “Your secret is safe with me.”

Smiling, Charlie kissed her mom’s forehead and waved goodbye, walking out of the room and fixing her bag.

She collided with someone because obviously she was shit at focusing at the moment.

“I’m so sorry- “

“It’s my bad, I apologize- “

Charlie laughed as her and the person, a tall woman with blond hair and blue eyes, started speaking over each other. She looked up with a smile. “I’m really sorry. I’m just having a shitty day, and this is not making things good.”

The woman waved it off. “It’s okay. I promise, we all have those shit days.”

“Karen, are you okay?”

A man with shoulder length hair walked up with a briefcase slung over his shoulder. The woman, Karen, nodded her head and tucked some of her hair behind her ears. “Yes, I’m fine. We just had a little collision. I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name.”

“Oh, Charlotte. Charlotte Vaughn. But you can call me Charlie.”

Karen held out her hand. “Karen Page. This is Foggy Nelson.”

Charlie tilted her head. “Of Nelson and Murdock, right?”

The man, Foggy, nodded. “Yes, that’s correct. You don’t happen to be Daisy Vaughn daughter, are you?”

“Guilty as charged, my good sir.”

Foggy laughed a little and turned to Karen. “Daisy is an amazing lawyer and I totally did not do some papers on her when I was in law school. I heard she’s sick. I hope everything is okay.”

Shrugging her shoulders, Charlie readjusted her bag. “She’s peachy. She’s not practicing anymore which I think hurts her more than anything, but nothing can be done about that.”

The air got awkward after Charlie answered his question and she was about to excuse herself before Karen spoke. “Hey, Foggy. We need another witness for our current case, right? Just someone to stand and basically oversee things. You wouldn’t mind, would you, Charlie?”

“I’m sure Ms. Charlotte has better things to do than stand around for a hearing.”

Charlie shook her head. “No, it’s fine. I don’t mind. It’d probably do me a world of good. I can do with a distraction.”

Foggy nervously laughed and went over to the nurses’ station and pulled out a legal document from his briefcase. “If you could sign here and here, we’ll go on up and get this over with.”

With almost trembling hands, Charlie signed the papers, a sinking feeling in her stomach.

She didn’t have to think hard as she followed Foggy and Karen to the elevator and rode with them.

She knew who they were seeing when more officers frisked her and checked her bag outside of a room.

And she was sure he could hear her heart beating through the door because it was roaring in her ears.

The three of them stepped inside the room and her eyes met with Frank’s. She swallowed thickly as she recognized the District Attorney, the judge and the courtroom clerk along with two armed officers were already in the room. And the DA did not look happy.

Nor did Frank for that matter.

He looked downright pissed and she couldn’t tell if it was because she was here or because he was there, tied down in a hospital bed, looking like he got the literal shit beat out of him. He just looked God awful and even though Charlie was used to seeing him with cuts and bruises, it never got easier.

“What is a civilian doing here?”

The DA was so not happy, and Charlie knew she was in big shit.

“We got us a witness for the court, Your Honor.”

Foggy looked timid, way too timid to be a lawyer if Charlie was being honest, and he fidgeted with his hands in his pockets. Karen stood to the side of him, and it looked like Charlie was all on her own. She shouldn’t speak, but she did love seeing people’s faces when they realized who her mom was, and she really wanted to see the DA’s face.

Because her mom had gone up against her a few times and won.

“Charlotte Vaughn, Your Honor. You may know my mother, Daisy Vaughn?”

Oh, they fucking knew alright.

Upon inspection of the legal document, Charlie was able to stay, and she kept her eyes downcast to the floor. She wanted to look at Frank, wanted to make sure he was alright, but she couldn’t.

Not without giving herself away.

“Case number 4854, The People v Frank Castle. Do you waive the reading of the charges?”

“Yes, Your Honor.”

It felt like it had been so fucking long since Charlie sat on case.

“Alright, then. How does the defendant plead?”

Charlie finally looked up at Frank, but his eyes were downcast, and he was breathing heavily. The wheels were turning in his head and Charlie knew that Frank was about to go from deep shit to deep, deep shit.

“I plead not guilty.”

A silent tear ran down Charlie’s left cheek at the sound of his voice.

“You hear that, witch? I’m gonna watch you burn right along with me. You hear me?”

Frank. Oh, Frank, what have you done?

Chapter Text

Stupid man.

Stupid, stupid man.

It had only been a day since that little court room trial happened, and all Charlie could do was not think of Frank which was easier said than done.

She wanted to be in the courtroom, needed to but this was no ordinary case. She was going to have to fight like hell to be inside with all the press and lawyers. It was the biggest case of the century and having a small firm like Nelson and Murdock represent him, people wanted to see their victory or their execution.

She just wanted to make sure Frank would be okay.

And she couldn’t believe her luck when Stacy contacted her.

Stacy had been one of the first lawyers on call with all the murder cases that just so happened to be due to Frank. If the cops ever caught the guy, she was one of the first people they would have called. But as the bodies started piling up, they all realized that this was well over their heads and the DA got ahold of the case before anyone else had the chance.

Charlie would swear that the DA had a bigger agenda than just to keep Frank behind bars.

There was talk of the death penalty which made her throat close up.

But Stacy, thank God for Stacy, she contacted Charlie saying that she could get her in. Apparently, her mom asked her to be there, to be her eyes and ears as this was a particularly big case that she wanted to know about. Charlie would have laughed at that if it weren’t for the fact that her mom was giving her a way into the trial, to be alongside Stacy in the audience and to hear what would happen to Frank.

Her mom was a fucking saint.

That was a problem that was solved but another had come up.

Karen Page.

Karen had taken to tracking down Charlie’s phone number and had asked for a meeting with her. Something about the way she said it made Charlie’s eyes narrow but she agreed, the worse that could happen is that Karen miraculously found out about her connection to Frank and called her an accessory.

She would eat her words as that is exactly why Karen called her to a little diner to have coffee.

The young woman, with her streaks now dyed a purple, sat across from Karen, fingering her coffee mug handle. She always was nervous being around people in her mom’s profession as they always looked so drastically different than her, but she kept her head held high.

And Karen seemed to be having trouble finding the right words.

“Um, thank you, Charlie, for meeting me on short notice.”

“You know, Ms. Page, you could have just asked for my number.”

Karen let out a breathless chuckle. “I know I could but there were other things on my mind. And just call me Karen. Please.”

Charlie nodded, watching her closely. Karen fidgeted with her hands on her lap, and she bit her lip a little. She was obviously choosing her words carefully but something else had her on edge, most likely Frank’s trial as she was part of the team who represented him.

“I really don’t know how to ask this, but I’ll just put it bluntly. Do you know Frank Castle?”

Charlie tried, God did she try, not to show any signs but she knew, somehow, she gave it away. Her throat started closing up and she swallowed thickly to get rid of the feeling. Her heart hammered in her chest and blood roared in her ears. This was it. This was how she fucked things up, not just for Frank, but for herself.

“Look, I’m asking because Frank had this look on his face when you walked in yesterday, and I could have sworn he was shouting accusations at us with his eyes. He knew you, or at least, recognized you, and I need to know if you can help me.”

Charlie swallowed again and her voice came out as a whisper. “Yeah. I know Frank.”

“Well, um, okay, yeah, we can work with this.” Karen let out a breathless chuckle. “Um, how do you know Frank?”

“I’m not helping you, Karen. I can’t go on the stand.”

“You’d be helping Frank, Charlie. He needs some good people on his side.”

Clearing her throat, Charlie looked directly into Karen’s baby blue eyes. “Not me. I’d make it worse.”

“Look. I was, I was going over cases of recent victims and found one of a sex trafficking gang who had been butchered, for lack of a better term. The women who escaped described a large man letting them go but taking off with a girl who had just been brought in. A girl who had had blue in her hair.”

Charlie chuckled. “Lots of people dye their hair, Karen.”

“But not a lot like you. You changed it but you had blue when we met. Charlie, were you there?”

Nostrils flaring, Charlie could feel the tears pinprick her eyes. “Yeah. Yeah, I was fucking there. I’ll tell you the exact thing I would tell the police. I have a dissociation disorder and I dissociated. I don’t remember what happened after they took me, nor can I tell you what happened afterwards. All I know is that I called for Frank, and he came. He is not a bad man, Karen. He’s a man who has had everything ripped away from him and he’s doing the only thing he knows to do. But I can’t take the stand. I would be an awful witness and the DA would use my dissociation against me and him one way or another. You can’t put me on the stand.”

Charlie stood and gathered her bag. “I’m sorry. If there was anything I could do to help Frank, I would. But you’re barking up the wrong tree. I’m no star witness. Find some other way to help him.” She bit her lip. “I can tell you one thing. The judge of the case is someone my mom has worked with before. She doesn’t take any bullshit so make sure whatever evidence or story you have is tight. She won’t listen to it and the DA will tear your asses apart.”

She walked out of that diner with tears streaming down her face. She felt like a failure, that she had let Frank down, but she couldn’t take the stand. She’d dissociate if she brought up what happened because that’s what she did in front of strangers. It had taken her so long of working through her triggers to talk to Daisy and Krista about her past without being triggered and being in a courtroom would make it worse.

She couldn’t help Frank and she felt helpless.

Her phone buzzed and she looked down to find that Stacy had texted her what time she needed to be ready in the morning.

She could not believe this was happening.

--------------------------------------------------------

The courtroom was packed.

Charlie had never seen it this packed, and she had sat on a lot of her mom’s cases but never one this big. Stacy had them right behind Nelson and Murdock’s table and Karen gave her a nod when the two of them sat down.

And then Frank walked in.

Charlie had to admit he still looked good in a bright orange jumpsuit though it didn’t fit him in the least bit. His five ‘o clock shadow was slowly coming back again, and he had a furrow in his brow as he walked straight ahead, glancing at her briefly before taking his seat.

And Frank-

Frank couldn’t believe that Charlie was there.

She looked really nice. Instead of her usual jeans and a t-shirt, she had on a black lace dress with the lace going down her arms. She couldn’t very well wear her gloves with the dress but damn, the glimpse that he caught of her made his heart pound.  And with her sitting behind him, it took all he had not to turn around and look at her.

It wouldn’t be good for either of them.

“All rise, court is now in session.”

Chapter Text

Charlie had to hand it to Foggy, the man could deliver a mean opening statement.

But she could see Frank was only semi impressed with his words even though Charlie agreed with them. Frank had traded one war zone for another, and he didn’t know how else to respond. What the fuck are you supposed to do when your family is gun down in cold blood and right in front of you? Obviously, the justice system was shit about it. Charlie couldn’t quite meet him on the same level there, seeing as her father opted for suicide by cops instead of allowing himself to be taken in, or at least that’s what she thought over the years.

She had gotten through with having dinner with Stacy before heading back to her apartment.

Max was not in the apartment when she returned, but she knew that Gram had been keeping him with her during the day which Charlie was grateful for. She really needed to work on him, but she had so much on her mind.

Her phone rang and she answered it without looking. “Charlie Vaughn.”

“Hey, Charlie.”

“Karen, is there something wrong?”

She could hear Karen chuckled. “No. I mean, I hope not. We have a lot to do before tomorrow, but I thought I’d let you know I got you in to see him.”

“See him?”

“To see Frank.”

Charlie choked on her own spit and started coughing, the sound of Karen being concerned in her ear. To see Frank? She could see Frank? What kind of shit did Karen have to do or say to pull that off? And of course, she wanted to see Frank. She was concerned over his safety and the trial itself.

“How the fuck did you do that?”

“It wasn’t that hard; you just have to go and ask to see him.”

Charlie made a clicking noise with her tongue. “Ah, yes. Just go and ask to see the Punisher. What will they think of me.”

Karen and her talked for a few more minutes before she decided that she would see him tomorrow, before the trial. It would just mean that she’d have to get up super fucking early and she hated waking up early.

But for Frank, she would.

----------------------------------------------

She was so out of place in the jail section of the courthouse with her being in a dress.

Charlie had walked right in and had asked to speak to Frank, which she knew surprised the officers. But she had to see him.

She went through security with the officers questioning her with their eyes, but she kept her head high. Now was not the time to let her anxiety overtake her. She followed an officer through the jail, several whistles were thrown her way as she walked, and she tried her best to ignore them. These people she was afraid of.

But not Frank.

They opened the door to a visitation room and there was Frank, handcuffed to the table. He looked up in surprise seeing her there and she swallowed thickly, hearing the clang of the door behind her.  She slowly walked towards him, and his face twisted in so many emotions that he was hard to read.

“Charlie?”

Tears pricked her eyes. “Hey, Frank.”

“If this is some bullshit attempt at getting me to get on board with their PTSD bullshit story, they really messed up.”

Charlie’s eyebrow went up as she chuckled and sat down across form him. “They really tried that?”

“Oh, yeah, they did. I wouldn’t let them. It’s an insult to those who actually go through it.”

“See, you’re a good man, Frank.” Charlie bit her lip. “To be honest, I don’t know why I’m here. Karen just said that I could be.”

“You know why you’re here, Charlie.”

The female looked at Frank, really looked at him. The bruising around his eyes was healing and looked a lot better than when he was in the hospital bed. He shaved, probably just before she came, and the sides of his head were shaved as well. The man seemed to like a crew cut and Charlie thought he looked good with it too.

“You’re staring, Charlie Rae.”

“I always stare. You know that.” Charlie took a deep breath and glanced down before looking back up at him. “I wanted to see you for myself. You’re in deep shit, Frank, and this trial delegates what happens to you. I’m scared for you, Frank.”

Frank sniffed and his eyebrow twitched. “You don’t have to worry about me, Charlie. Worry about yourself.”

“I am going to worry about you, dipshit.”

This is what he liked about her.

Maria never used that kind of language, but she had her own way of not dealing with his bullshit. She was soft spoken until she needed to be stern and when she was stern, you knew you had to listen or else you’d be in deep trouble. But Charlie, she snarked back, didn’t take no shit. Frank knew that she probably wanted to cuss him out for getting caught but refrained from it because what good would it do?

“You look good, you know.”

“Don’t fucking change the subject.”

But there was a twinkle in her eye, one that Frank noticed when he first met her. That twinkle could captivate him, and he’d do anything to make sure that it stayed there. Charlie smoothed a hand over her dress. “It’s my wedding slash funeral dress. Mom always said to dress professional when coming into a courthouse no matter what.”

“Your momma is a smart woman.”

Charlie smiled fondly. “Yeah, she is. She’d have liked you honestly. You’re just her type of man. Military.”

“Yeah, well, I like her. She did raise a fine woman.”

She couldn’t help but blush at his comment.

“But you’re doing okay, right?”

Biting her bottom lip, she nodded. “I’m okay. Just, processing things, you know. There’s always a lot to process and I have to constantly be on the lookout for triggers. But I’m okay.”

Their conversation ended there as Frank’s trial was to set to resume shortly. Charlie gave him a wink before going with officers and Frank was left alone.

--------------------------------------------------

The trial went on with Frank’s old colonel taking the stand.

Charlie was listening closely to him when her phone buzzed in her hand. She had put it on vibrate for the trial and in case work contacted her but when she looked down, her blood ran cold.

It was her mom’s doctor.

She had given him her phone number early on in her mom’s prognosis in case something happened but he never contacted her, he always waited until she came in to talk.

Charlie discreetly opened her phone, feeling Stacy’s gaze on her and she almost lost it.

‘You need to be with your mom.’

Without second thought, Charlie grabbed her bag and all but ran out of the courtroom, feeling all eyes on her. She dashed out of the building and hailed a cab before telling him to take her to the hospital.

God, please not her mom. Not today.

Charlie struggled to get out of the cab because of her dress but she finally just bunched it up, running into the hospital. Delores pointed when she saw her and she ran down the halls, trying not to run into personnel and patients alike. She skidded to a stop when she saw Dr. Blake talking to a nurse in front of her mom’s room and she reached into her bag to grip her inhaler as her throat threatened to close.

The doctor looked at her with a solemn look on his face and walked over to her.

“My mom. Dr. Blake, my mom.”

The male doctor heaved a sigh. “She’s nearing the end, Charlie. She’s barely eating and sleeping a lot now. Those are signs she’s nearing the end.”

“But she was fine the other day. She was doing okay.”

“It’s a disease that progresses at its own pace, Charlie. We can only sit and wait for how long it’ll go on. Right now, you need to be with her.”

Swallowing, Charlie brushed past him and into her mom’s room. Daisy was either sleeping soundly or unconscious in her bed, her chest going up and down in a shallow manner. Charlie rested her hand on her mom’s and was freaked out by how cold it was and how grey her skinned look. Pulling up a chair, Charlie sat by her mom for who knows how long until Daisy opened up her eyes and looked at her, her voice coming out hoarse and softly. “Hey, baby girl.”

“Hi, mom.”

Charlie stayed by her mom’s side for the rest of the day and all through the night, calling on Gram to take care of Max and the cats. The nurses brought her a blanket and constantly made sure she was comfortable during the night which she appreciated. Daisy woke up several times during the night but was otherwise sleeping, like the littlest thing exhausted her.

It wasn’t until the next afternoon that Daisy Vaughn took her last breath.

Charlie kissed her mom’s forehead with tears streaming down her face.

There was only one place that she wanted to be right now.

Chapter Text

Charlie needed to see Frank.

She quickly texted Stacy, ignoring her texts of concerned, and asked how the trial was going though she had to rewrite the text multiple times due to tears falling from her eyes. She went home not long after Daisy was pronounced dead to change her clothes and see her animals, tears streaming down her face the entire time. Taking a shower was also on her list but she just stood there in the stream, wondering why her second mom had been taken from her. She finally scrubbed off all of the makeup that was probably smeared all over her face before finishing up.

It was ironic that both of her moms died in the same hospital.

And now she just wanted to see Frank, she needed to see Frank.

Throwing her hair up and petting Max goodbye, she took to the streets again, this time on her way to the courtroom. Stacy gave her the bare minimum of what was going on and Charlie winced as she was told what the doctor who had sat in the stand said. Frank would not be happy in the least bit.

He didn’t look happy at all as she finally sat across from him, Charlie keeping her face straight until she broke the silence barrier, bringing her feet up to rest on the chair. “Well, that must have not been easy for you to be told what was wrong with you or, at least, what they think is wrong.”

She smirked up at him, but it didn’t reach her eyes. Frank knew how she smiled and smirked; they were something that would light up her whole goddamn face, make her eyes shine with a twinkle. But he could always see a hint of sadness always present in her eyes. It was what had prompted him to ask about her story in the first place.

But now, that light was gone, and her eyes seemed dead, a red ring around them like she had been crying. There was only one reason besides him that she would cry over.

He took in a deep breath. “Let’s not talk about me.”

She raised an eyebrow at him and did a one shoulder shrug. “Then what shall we discuss?”

“What happened yesterday?”

Frank noticed her posture stiffened, her eyes narrow and rosy lips tightened. She swallowed hard and her breathing picked up. “What happened, Charlie Rae?”

She started to shake her head but Frank was faster. “No, something happened. You ran out of the courtroom like the hounds of hell were at your heels.”

Charlie’s breath caught in her throat, and she looked at everything but him. She had come back here because she needed to be with someone she trusted; someone she knew had been through pain like she had. It would have been easier to go to Gram; she would have listened, let her break herself down until she was nothing but she didn’t want that. Frank made her not want to and that’s why she was here.

“Is it your mom?”

She couldn’t breathe.

Charlie curled in on herself as Frank watched her from across the table. He fidgeted; the chains rattling as he leaned forward in his seat. “Hey. Hey now. Don’t do that, Rae. Don’t keep it to yourself. Come.. Come on, Charlie. Don’t... Don’t make me watch you do this to yourself. You need to breathe, Charlie. Come on, Charlotte; breathe.”

Charlie bit her lip and rested her knees against the table; the cold metal biting through her jeans and causing a chill to sweep through her body. Resting her forehead on her knees and taking a deep breath, she brought her left hand up to the table; reaching across to where she knew his right would be. She didn’t want to see his face as she looped her index finger around his; one small connection while the world continued to fall down around her in a great wave of darkness and grief.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlie Rae had been escorted out of the cell at the request of an officer as Karen arrived. The blonde took one look at her and then turned accusing eyes toward Frank. It pissed him off but there was nothing for him to do. His mind turned from Charlie losing her mother to the kid in the courtroom; something that Charlie had, thankfully, not witnessed.

“I did that. Right? That kid, I took his father away from him. I did that.”

Karen had sat down in the seat Charlie had preoccupied and was looking at the ground, biting her fingernails. She stopped to answer him. “Yeah, you did.”

He looked at her closer. “Uh-huh.”

She turned her head toward and shook her head slightly. “Look, Frank, I can’t judge you.”

And Frank knew she couldn’t. She saw something different in him, like Charlie did. She knew what actually happened to his family; why he did what he did. It’s not that she wouldn’t judge him; it was that she couldn’t.

He took in her drooped shoulders and sad eyes, softening his voice. “That was tough in there for you, right? It was, um,” he scrunched up his eyes a bit, “hard?”

Karen took in a deep breath and looked side to side; looking almost like Charlie did when a memory popped up unexpectedly. For all he knew, she was incredibly like Charlie and him with a past that haunted her every day for every second. And the littlest of things could bring back them back.

“Yeah.”

Frank nodded slightly and looked off toward the side.

“Okay.” She leaned forward. “You gotta do something for me.”

Frank gave her a look and studied her face, trying to read it. “Hmm?”

Karen took a deep breath and swallowed hard. “I need you to take the stand.”

Frank jerked a little.

Take the stand?

He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. “Come on, what for? Why would I-”

“The jury has to know what happened to you, what you go through every single day. After this afternoon...” Karen sighed. That afternoon had been a disaster. She could see on the faces of the jury that the kid’s outburst had affected them and there was no way they could keep it from affecting their conclusion. “I don’t think we have any other shot.”

Frank scoffed. “What? And what do you think is gonna happen here? We’re not gonna win this thing.”

Karen shook her head. “No, but we can still reduce the charges.” The man across from her sucked in a deep breath as she continued. “Look, that might not be important to you, but it is important to me; important to Charlie.”

Frank’s eyes lit up for a second at the sound of the name and Karen wasn’t sure if it was anger or something else. “All of them, they all think you’re a monster. But I know that you’re not. You’re not!” She quickly composed herself as her voice raised a bit. Frank just sat with an expression Karen couldn’t decipher and she hated it. The two of them were silent before he broke it.

“You sure about that?”

Karen’s heart broke a little at how quiet and hurt his voice sounded.

“What if I find these men that did that to my family? What if...” He breathed for a second. “What if nothing changes?” He muttered something under his breath before speaking up; his top lip curling a bit.

“What if this is just me now?”

They sat in silence again as Frank looked off to the side and Karen searched his face. She shrugged one shoulder. “Then don’t you deserve to know that, too?”

His eyes snapped quickly to her face, and she tucked her hair behind her ears before leaning closer, voice low. “Look, Frank, I’m not trying to push you; I’m really not. But Foggy and Matt, the only other play they could have is to put Charlie Rae on the stand.”

Frank physically bristled at that. “Why would they do that?”

“She’s the only other one who knows the truth about you; you said so yourself. The police also suspect you in the deaths of that sex trafficking gang and they know she was there. I questioned her and she covered for you; saying she had on a dissociated which I believe her, but they still suspect you in killing them.” Frank’s right index finger was twitching as Karen spoke and she shook her head. “I don’t want her on the stand. With how she bolted out of the courtroom and how she looked just now, something bad happened today and putting her up there is a bad move. But even if Foggy and Matt don’t, the DA might. She’s smart and if she knows better, which she does, she’ll put Charlie Rae up there and figure out a way to destroy her; to somehow turn her testimony against you or implicate her in something.”

Frank bit his bottom lip and fervently looked everywhere besides Karen. Charlie Rae didn’t deserve that; she didn’t deserve anything that happened to her. The DA could break her or send her into an anxiety attack which would trigger an asthma attack, or she’d dissociate and Frank knew deep down that he was in far deeper with her than he should be.

He nodded his head once. “I’ll take the stand.”

A burden felt like it had lifted off of Karen and she sighed with relief. “Thank you, Frank-”

“But you leave Charlie Rae out of this. You don’t mention her name or anything. Just keep her off the stand.” Frank looked at Karen with an intensity that she wondered just how far he would go for the girl.

“I’ll do that, Frank. I promise.”

Chapter Text

Karen had texted Charlie the next day that Frank was taking the stand.

Charlie almost laughed in a hysterical manner. She had been up for most of the night due to night terrors and crying for her mom. Honestly, she was in no position to continue going to this trial, but she would for Frank. She had to see what would happen to him, she wanted to hear what he had to say.

She could empathize for him, but would the jury be able to?

Stacy had greeted her when she came in and gave her condolences for her mom which Charlie appreciated before they both sat down.

Frank walked in soon after his defense called for him, the crowd in the room making some noise. Some booed him while others cheered and damn, if Charlie hadn’t been smitten before, she was now.

Because Frank looked damn good in a suit.

She kept her gaze in front of her until the man took a seat in the stand and even then, she was hesitant to look at him. Was it evident on her face that she had feelings for him? Should she have not come and instead just stayed home to find out the verdict on TV? Frank would have understood if she hadn’t come but would she have been able to live with herself? She hoped her presence alone gave him some relief that at least one person in this world gave an actual fuck about what happened to him.

Maybe Charlie should have stayed home.

But it was too late now.

Charlie narrowed her eyes when one of the officers who brought him in seemed to whisper something to Frank and they narrowed even further when Matt Murdock stood up and started questioning Frank. He wanted the man to talk about the day his family died, something that made Charlie’s heart ache. She had heard the story, could repeat it word for word despite her condition at the time, and she didn’t think it was fair that Murdock was making him talk about something so personal.

“Do you? Do you understand? ‘Cause I don’t think you understand shit.”

And if Charlie had been anywhere else, she would have chuckled, but she held it in and held back a smile as well. Because Frank was being Frank. He didn’t beat around the bush like the lawyers did when it came to questioning.

“Permission to treat the witness as hostile?”

And then Matt Murdock went into a spiel.

He talked about how Frank was the kind of man the city needed. Because Hell’s Kitchen was sick with thugs and traffickers and just polluters. It had a virus running through it, a virus that Frank had been taking care of even if it was for his own personal agenda. He was still helping Hell’s Kitchen. The police couldn’t handle things on their own and the DA was just a shit show really.

“We need heroes.”

Charlie agreed with everything the blind man said and more as his speech ended and the room started to applaud. But there was something she did not agree with. The city didn’t need another hero, it needed a monster. Someone who wasn’t afraid to get their hands dirty.

And maybe Frank was a monster for all he had done but Charlie didn’t think so.

She had never thought that though.

“He doesn’t know the difference between wrong and right anymore.”

Okay, that was just insulting, and Charlie’s eyebrow went up at that remark. Frank must absolutely be seething.

“Your, uh, Your Honor. Can I say something?”

No. No. Frank keep your mouth shut, you insufferable bastard.

Charlie could see the wheels turning and her breathing picked up. He was going to say something that ruined all of what Matt Murdock was trying to accomplish, everything his team had worked so hard at building. He was going to destroy it all.

Charlie just fucking knew.

She wished she wasn’t right when Frank started going off, telling the jury he’d do it all over again. How he was sane, that no one could help him and that he liked it.

This wasn’t the Frank Castle Charlie knew. This wasn’t the man she had been falling for.

Tears started pouring down Charlie’s cheeks and she closed her eyes as Frank stood up.

“You people, you call me the Punisher, ain’t that right. The big, bad Punisher. Well, here I am!”

As Frank was led down from the stand, he couldn’t help but look at Charlie and it hurt. She was crying and it was all his fault that she had tears streaming from her doe like eyes. Fuck, she wouldn’t even look at him as he passed and all he could do was keep up his charade and pray to whoever heard him that they would let her forgive him.

God, please let Charlie forgive him.

--------------------------------

Stacy put her arm around Charlie as the room was called to clear.

“I’m so sorry, honey. I shouldn’t have let you come today. You have too much on your mind.”

Funny, she thought that Charlie’s tears were for her mom. What would people think when they heard that her tears were for the man back there? Tears for the Punisher?

How they would laugh at her.

“Charlie!”

The young woman turned around, telling Stacey to go on, as Karen came running up to her. “I’m sorry about your mom. We all just heard this morning.”

Charlie thanked her but had the feeling it was not what Karen wanted to talk about. Which she would be correct about.

“Charlie, did Frank say anything, or mention what he was going to do today?”

She shook her head and Karen’s eyes furrowed; her voice low so others couldn’t hear. “Are you sure? We can’t help him anymore; he blew up everything we were trying to convince the jury of. He’s got multiple life sentences, and there is no way we can even have a mistrial. He completely blew it.”

Charlie bit her bottom lip and shook her head, tears filling her eyes. “That’s Frank for ya. I didn’t know he was going to do anything until I saw him on the stand, I know when the gears in his head are turning. But Karen, I can’t help you and I can’t help you because I didn’t know anything. This is Frank we’re talking about. He does things on his own because the consequences would be on him and no one else. The man is a stupid idiot but he’s a smart idiot. Something must have happened to make him do it and I don’t think we’ll ever know.”

Sniffling, Charlie flashed a sad smile. “If you’ll excuse me. I have to plan my mother’s funeral.”

She could not afford to waste time on Frank anymore.

Frank was on his own. Frank wanted to be on his own. And has much as it hurt Charlie to admit it, but she had to let him go.

Because Frank fucked up.

And as Charlie sat in her apartment later, crying her eyes out, she knew that she fucked up as well.

She had made an image out of Frank, someone to take away the monsters at night while, maybe, he was the monster all along. Maybe he really did like killing people and the DA was right, he was a serial killer. Did he honestly do it for his family? Did he do it because he couldn’t hold back what the marines instilled in him?

Whatever it was, Charlie’s heart was breaking.

And it was all Frank Castle’s fault.

Chapter Text

Charlie often wondered why it rained at funerals.

She was told when she was little that it was because the heavens were crying for the loss of life, that God was sympathizing with the people on Earth. As she got older, she learned that rain was a symbol that the soul of the deceased was flying to heaven. Or maybe, just maybe, the universe had a sick sense of humor and it rained at funerals.

It rained at her mom and brother’s funeral.

And it rained again at Daisy’s.

In fact, it rained a lot after Daisy’s death, just like Charlie cried the most she had ever cried in her life.

She had taken more than a few weeks off work which Summers understood, especially after being told about her mom. ‘Take all the time you need’, she was told. But it was more than just her mom, she was mourning the loss of Frank too.

Frank, who had been sent to prison and Charlie dare not go in there.

Not to see him anyway.

She couldn’t bring herself to enter the building, even though she found herself outside of it a lot. She would take a taxicab and just stand outside before hailing another cab and leaving. Really, she needed to get away from everything that reminded her of him which was practically everything. He had left such an imprint on the city, on her, that everywhere she went, it was like he had left a residue behind. She had gone back to the carousel one time since he had been incarcerated but she had to leave because it was too painful.

Stupid, stupid, son of a bitch.

Macy tried to help cheer her up as well as Gram. The two were her closest friends and she went with them wherever they wanted to take her in hopes of shutting the both of them up. Only Gram knew about Frank, knew about what happened between her and the man. Gram seemed to like Frank by what Charlie had said and she had apparently seen the man the night of Charlie’s kidnapping.

Karen had also contacted her.

They met at a local coffee shop and Karen had gotten there first.

Charlie sat across from her when she arrived. “What’s up, Karen?”

Karen gave her a smile but also looked nervous. She looked nervous when Charlie had walked in too, and the young woman noticed that she chose a booth in the corner away from everyone else.

Raising an eyebrow, Charlie took a sip of her coffee. “So, what did you ask me here for?”

“Well, you see, I was able to get my hands on a few police reports and one in particular came up.” She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “It was about the warehouse where you were kept. One of the women came forward and talked about what happened. She mentioned Frank, of course, but she also mentioned you.”

Charlie’s heart was beating, and she could feel herself turning hot.

She could smell the warehouse on her clothes and feel the chill on her skin. Blinking, she tried not to dissociate from remembering how she felt after Frank had saved her. She was really trying to put it behind her, like all the things her father did to her, but it didn’t work if people or herself kept bringing it all up.

Taking another sip of coffee, Charlie shrugged, trying to seem like it didn’t bother her. “Now you know what happened.”

“Um, yes, but what happened afterwards, Charlie? How did Frank find you?”

Charlie shrugged again. “I have no clue how Frank found me; he just did. And I never asked, which, to be honest, I wasn’t in the right mind to ask. What happened afterwards is that he helped me home. He made sure I was okay, and he stayed with me much longer than he was probably comfortable with. He’s a good man, Karen, that bad things have happened to.”

Karen listened to Charlie talked about Frank a little more, though Charlie figured she should have kept her mouth shut some. She was trying hard to get him off her mind and this was not helping at all.

The two talked for a little bit before parting ways, Charlie’s heart feeling heavier than it had been.

-------------------

It was a few days later when it hit the news that the Punisher had escaped the prison.

It was a few days after that that it was determined that Frank Castle, the Punisher of Hell’s Kitchen, was dead.

And Charlie had cried both times.

She had cried for the man that Frank was and the man he used to be. She cried because she had gotten in too deep with him, let her heart become too invested in him. She cried because her heart was breaking, and she cried because she would never tell him that she loved him.

That’s what Gram had told her one time when they were talking, that the way that Charlie talked about him was one of love, that she could see it in her eyes how much she loved him. And Charlie didn’t know what to think. She had never loved anyone outside of her family, not even her past boyfriends. They were all douchebags that she had taken a liking too and sure, they had sex and whatnot, but Charlie never loved any of them.

But Charlie had fallen in love with Frank and now he was gone.

She was sitting in the blue armchair one night, drinking some tea, which she usually never did, and reading when she saw Max perk his head up. The dog had been the best thing for her in the long run and she was so incredibly grateful to the man who brought him to her. Max got up from where he was laying and went to the door, tilting his head and wagging his tail. Marking her place, Charlie got up and walked over to him.

“You need to go out, boy? Do you need to go- “?

She stopped dead in her tracks when she opened the door and there was Frank.

Her heart was in her throat as she backed away from him, Max going crazy with joy at seeing his rescuer again. Charlie put a hand over her mouth and shook her head. He wasn’t there. He was dead.

She wasn’t crazy. She wasn’t crazy.

Frank pet the dog jumping on him but kept a steady eye on Charlie.

She was dressed in a set of black pajama tank and shorts and her hair was pulled into a high bun. Frank that she was beautiful in that moment, and he watched her face closely to see what she was thinking. But he couldn’t decipher it as too many were passing by, and she kept shaking her head.

“You’re not real.”

She kept repeating it over and over again as Frank closed the door and took slow, steady steps toward her. It was like if she kept repeating the mantra, it would save her from whatever nightmare she was in. She was already having trouble sleeping with new night terrors that had Frank dying in them.

“You’re not real.”

Charlie closed her eyes as Frank stopped in front of her and she held her breath, her lungs begging for the release, and she gave it to them when a hand touched her cheek.

It was warm. It was big. It was Frank.

She fell into him, crashed into his chest really, and sobbed. He wrapped his arms around her and brought her close, sinking to the floor with her in his arms. Petting her head, he let her cry as much as she needed before she started hiccupping and he brought her face up to his, their lips meeting.

It was wet from tears, it was awkward, it was probably a little snotty if she was being honest.

But to her, it felt like coming home.

Chapter Text

Charlie broke the kiss and smacked his chest as hard as she could which made him grunt.

“You stupid, stupid son of a bitch.”

Frank Castle chuckled like his life wasn’t on the line because Charlie could kill him with the glare she just gave him.

She sniffed and buried her face in his chest once more, her voice muffled. “They said you were dead. They said you had been killed.”

Frank pressed his lips to her forehead as best he could in their position. “It takes a lot more than that to kill me, doll.”

“Don’t call me that. You don’t get that right.”

Frank chuckled again. “And why’s that?”

Charlie pulled back all of the sudden and stood up, pacing around the room. “You stupid asshole! You fucked up in the courtroom. Why the fuck did you do that!? And escaped prison? Your fucking face is out there for everyone to see, and you could get caught! And don’t even get me started on how much fucking sleep I’ve lost over you, you son of a bitch!”

God, he had missed her.

Charlie waved her arms when she saw that he was just staring. “Oi! Listen to me!”

“I am listening, Charlie.”

The tears came back. “No, you’re not. You aren’t listening to me when I say how stupid you are. I cried over you, Frank, I mourned for you. I buried you along with my mom and I accepted the fact that I loved you and probably wouldn’t be able to say it to you. You aren’t listening when I say that you’re in deep shit and where the fuck are you going to go now? You’re going to have to leave me because you can’t stay here. Why did you come back, Frank? Why did you come back?”

“You love me?”

Charlie had gone over to her nightstand as she spoke and grabbed her inhaler, shoving it into her mouth as Frank asked his question. She breathed in her medication and looked up at the ceiling, sitting down on her bed. “Yes, you dumbass. I love you. And I’m not saying it to you to hear it back. I‘m saying it so that you know the next time you fuck up.”

Frank had stood up and pet Max as she talked. “Charlie, I-”

“Why did you come back?”

Why did he come back? Why did he come back to her when he could have run? He was a free man, and the explosion gave him some time to make himself a new identity. Frank Castle was dead in the eyes of Hell’s Kitchen and yet, instead of running, he came back to her. To Charlie.

To his Charlie.

Charlie waved her hand. “Forget I asked. Do what you need to do.”

“I came back for you.”

Teary doe eyes looked at him as he came over to her and knelt in front of her. “I’m not saying I don’t love you, but I can’t say it yet. I came back because I couldn’t leave without seeing your face again. Look, Charlie, I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through. I never wanted you to go through any of this shit and I should have tried better at keeping you out of it but selfishly, I wanted you there. I wanted you through all of the bullshit. And I’m asking you to keep on trusting me still.”

“As stupid as it sounds, I’ll always trust you.”

Shit, she sounded like a lovesick teenager in one of those movies. And it was probably stupid to continue to trust Frank after all of the fucking stupid bullshit that he pulled but she couldn’t help it. She did trust him and knew that he did things because he had to do them. Were they always smart? Fuck no. But they worked because he was Frank.

Though she was sort of convinced that maybe he was shot in the head at one point in time and it thoroughly messed up his thinking.

Frank carefully and slowly brought up a hand and cupped the back of her neck and Charlie tried not to melt. She had several sensitive areas, and her neck was one of them that she had discovered with her first boyfriend. But not in a sexual way, in a comfort way. It made her feel safe and it grounded her, something she needed when she was going through an attack. Though, Frank’s thing of putting her against his chest seemed to do the trick as well.

Charlie really tried not to let it show how much she enjoyed it when Frank squeezed her neck gently.

“I can’t promise you anything. Shit’s gonna happen that I have no control over, and I don’t want it falling back on you. I need to lay low for a while and that’s going to require us being apart. I need you to handle this, I need you safe while I try to work things out.”

Nodding, Charlie glanced down and swallowed.

She could handle it. Hadn’t she been handling all of it already? She could handle a few more weeks, maybe even months, of him not being around.

Frank touched his forehead to hers and she let out a sigh, a full body shiver escaping her.

“But you have to promise to touch base. I can’t do this if I don’t know you’re alive. Please, Frank, at least promise me this.”

He shouldn’t.

But he would.

“I promise.”

Charlie took in a shuddering breath before murmuring. “I miss you.”

“I know.”

“Alright, Han Solo, be that way.”

But there was no malice in her voice, just teasing. To be honest, they really didn’t know that much about each other except for the real deep shit of their lives and now was a good a time as any. Frank needed to leave again but right now, he was here with Charlie, and she was safe.

So, for the next few hours, they talked and asked questions.

Frank didn’t have a favorite color, but he liked the color of Charlie’s eyes which she rolled them at him. Her favorite color was red, but not blood red. She hated blood red which Frank remarked that she must have hated seeing him with all the cuts on his face.

She had scowled at him.

They ended up on her futon couch with her legs draped over his and he put a reassuring hand on them. He could ground her like no other person she knew and just knowing that he was leaving again, she just wanted his hands on her in whatever way he wanted to.

She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t horny for him.

But too soon, it was time for him to go, he had to go. Charlie shed more tears at the prospect of not seeing him but he touched foreheads with her again, reminding her of her promises and his. It wouldn’t be forever, and Frank still had to sort out some shit in his head regarding his family.

He loved Maria, always would. But he couldn’t bring her back from the dead.

But Charlie was here, and Charlie was alive.

He had to let go of Maria at some point, but he needed time, time Charlie had promised to him.

And as he went out the door with a glance back, Charlie knew one thing.

She would love Frank Castle till the day she died.

Chapter Text

That interaction had been a year ago.

And Frank was still gone.

Which Charlie had promised him that it was okay, that she could handle it. It wasn’t like they didn’t have communication. Once a week, sometimes more, she would get a text from a number that said either ‘thinking of you’ or ‘I’m okay’. And it was enough for her.

The thought did cross her mind that Frank was dead, and someone was playing with her once or twice, but she knew Frank.

He didn’t die that easily.

So, she spent her time staying busy.

Her work at the clinic had slowed a little during the first months of Frank being gone. She went from working full time to part time, but she picked up some hours working with Karen Page. The blonde had gone and gotten a job with a local newspaper, and she sometimes would come to Charlie for a little help. Because Charlie had a sharp eye for things, not that it helped her personally. She was awful at using it for herself unless it was to pick someone out of the crowd, but she was good at looking over papers and pictures. Her mom used to bring out old cases that she worked on and let Charlie look over them and she sometimes found things her mom had overlooked. Karen had Charlie basically doing the same thing and she would sometimes ask her to go on interviews with her because she could read people.

She told Karen one time no one was going to take her seriously if she didn’t toughen up and stop looking away when people made eye contact with her.

Karen took it to heart.

So, Charlie became part of Karen’s research team which she enjoyed a lot. It was a fun little side job, and she was able to help Karen write up some kickass articles, which had the blonde female rising in the ranks at the newspaper office. So, you could say, the two females had gotten quite close to each other. Close enough that Charlie told her some of her past but not close enough that she told her that Frank was alive. Perhaps Karen already knew it, which is why she never brought it up, but she wouldn’t tell her that she was in contact with him or that she could get into contact with him if she wanted to.

The second thing that Charlie did was learn basic self-defense with classes.

She realized that maybe she could never put what she learned into use because of her dissociation but she would never know unless she tried. Finding a private security company, Anvil, that gave classes, she had signed up for some of their private classes and let them know of her dissociation in case some of the scenes they used for practice triggered her. It already had been several months, and she had dissociated more times than she wanted to, making her angry. But her teacher never gave up on her. He also taught teams of veterans and people with PTSD traumas how to serve on a security team. If he could teach them, he could teach a woman like Charlie a few things in order to protect herself.

And lastly, Charlie started helping with a veteran therapy group.

She liked the group a lot as it was made up of people who had once served in wars or those who still served. There would be some old timers that would come and give advice to the younger guys or someone who was still serving would come because he needed help with what he had seen overseas. Charlie didn’t really participate in the group, but she provided sandwiches and coffee and overed moral support to the men and the founder of the group, Curtis.

Curtis and Charlie had become fast friends.

Curtis was an amputee and sometimes had difficulties getting around which Charlie was okay with helping him set up before the group came. He was easy going and very sweet, someone Charlie could talk to besides her therapist.

He was also a former squad mate of Frank’s.

Charlie may have choked on the coffee that she had been drinking when he told her that.

It was a small fucking world.

But Charlie never told him about Frank, not really. She did say that she was at the trial, had a front row seat to it. She told him about Karen and how she had tried really hard to bring Frank’s family to justice. But she didn’t tell him about how close she was to him because she didn’t know how he’d react. Curtis was closed off when it came to Frank and Charlie didn’t know if it was because the man blamed him and agreed that he was a monster or if he agreed with those that thought Frank was a hero.

Whatever it was, Charlie didn’t bring anything about Frank up unless Curtis did. Maybe someday, she’d tell him and Karen about Frank and her but for now, she kept quiet.

It was the best for everybody.

It was a late Friday afternoon when she walked into the building where the veteran group had their therapy, carrying a big cooler full of sandwiches in one hand and Max’s leash in the other. She dropped the leash, as Max just stuck around the room, and got out the coffee canisters from where they put them away, setting about making coffee when she saw Curtis enter the room, a smile on his face.

“Hey, Charlie Rae.”

His baritone voice always made her smile, he reminded her of Frank. “What’s up, Curtis?”

She heard him sigh as he bent down to pet Max, the pitbull wagging his little butt at the attention he was getting. “Leg’s acting up but nothing I can’t handle.”

“Did you go to the doctor I told you about?”

Curtis sighed again. “No, Charlie, I didn’t. I have a doctor; I don’t need a new one.”

Shrugging, Charlie finished making the coffee and waited for it to drip into the canisters before turning around and looking at Curtis, tucking her black with now white streaks, behind her ears. “It doesn’t hurt to ask opinions from others, you know.”

“I’ll be fine, Charlie.”

The female hummed and waved a hand at him before shaking her head.

Men.

“Speaking of doctors- “

Oh, fuck you.

“Did you go to the appointment with both your doctor and your therapist?”

Charlie scowled at Curtis, annoyed he brought it up. She hadn’t, of course she hadn’t because she still didn’t like going to them. Her lungs were fine for the most part and she had been using her meter at home, so she didn’t feel the need to go see Delores. And Krista, well, she didn’t want to talk about Frank. She didn’t want to talk about the hole that had been left in her life by him not being there. Sure, they didn’t know each other for that long but it was long enough for her to fall in love and get attached to him.

And she didn’t want to talk about that.

“Touché, old man. Touché.”

“First off, I’m not that old, Charlie. And secondly, you need to go see them. I’m asking you as your friend.”

Charlie took a deep breath. “Okay, fine, fine. I’ll go see them. You won’t leave me alone otherwise.”

Their conversation ended there as the first person of the group filed into the room, Max greeting them. She brought him along because he was usually good among the men though some, he avoided all together. He usually laid down in the middle of the group and Charlie was able to go about without having to worry about him.

Soon, the group therapy was in full swing, and Charlie was going about washing the coffee canisters. She had just finished putting them away and was coming back to the group when she stopped upon seeing a figure standing right outside the door. Usually, they had people who wanted to come but were either too prideful or too scared to.

Charlie walked up to them.

“Hi! You’re welcome to go in you know.”

The figure jumped, a man with long hair and a beard, and turned to look at her.

Charlie’s heart stopped in her chest, and she covered her mouth.

Because even if he covered up his face, she’d recognized his eyes anywhere.

It was Frank.

Chapter Text

Charlie stared at Frank.

He was wearing a trucker’s hat with his hood pulled over it. And of course, he was wearing a dark jacket and jeans. The man practically lived in dark clothing just like she did.

“Frank?”

He slowly came over to her and she may have taken a step back. She didn’t expect to see him, especially not here. He didn’t seem like a group therapy type of person any less than she was.

“Hey, Charlie.”

She felt so weak when she felt tears come to her eyes and Frank, he hated seeing her in tears and knowing he was the cause of them.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. I’m here.”

He reached out and touched her arms, bringing her close to touch foreheads. He had missed her. He had missed their meaningless conversations and he had just missed her presence. She had gotten rid of the colorful streaks in her hair and opted for white ones instead, but it never mattered to him because they were what made Charlie, well, Charlie.

And she pressed her forehead into his like her life depended on it.

“You’re okay? You’re not in trouble, are you?”

She talked in whispers, as if she didn’t want anyone knowing that she had a secret, and that secret was him. As if she didn’t want the other people in the group therapy to know he was here.

“Yeah, Charlie. I’m okay. I just- I need to see Curtis to drop off a book.”

She nodded, not pressing on why he saw Curtis and not her, and he knew she understood. She always did. Maybe she understood without wanting to or maybe she understood really without needing to. She was still a mystery, even to Frank, and he was okay with that. There were things he’d never tell her, and he knew there were things she’d rather not talk about.

Like her exes.

He hated them without even knowing them.

She’d kick him for that for sure.

They heard the group talking and she pulled away from him, to really look at him. “You really went all out, huh?”

“I didn’t know what else to do.”

She searched his face, bringing a hand up to his cheek. “To be honest, ya look good but I like ya better without all of this.”

He chuckled and turned into her hand, resting his own on hers and closing his eyes. She grounded him as much as he grounded her. And he needed her close, just for a few minutes. They stood like that for God knows how long before she gently patted his face. “They’ll be done soon. You sure you don’t want to come in?”

He nodded. “You’re just seeing Curtis?”

Again, he nodded, his eyes still closed and just smelling her scent. “Do you want to see him alone?”

“It doesn’t matter to me.”

She hummed and he squeezed her hand in his.

Just a few more minutes.

But he heard the rustling of clothes and he let her hand go when she tugged it. She smiled softly at him and kissed his cheek before walking around him and going into the room.

She couldn’t believe that he was here, at group therapy of all places, even if he hadn’t come in and joined. Charlie didn’t have much to do before she could leave but she would stay out of his and Curtis’ way, she didn’t want to invade in his personal business if it involved his time overseas.

“How you sleeping, Lewis?”

God bless Curtis and how he looked after these people.

Charlie just smiled at him when he gave her a questioning look and she looked away from him to say goodbye to some of the participants. Some of them thanked her for the coffee and sandwiches, some asked how she was, one asked if she was single. She chuckled at that one and patted the man on the back before helping put away the chairs. Charlie then saw Max go to the door, where Frank was standing in the shadows, and the man bent down to pet the dog.

That dog was the most grateful thing on the face of the planet.

Though, she noticed he stayed away from Lewis as Max hid behind Frank as the young man went out the door.

“Thank you, Charlie.”

She laughed. “Oh my word, Curt, stop it. I enjoy helping out.”

And she watched Frank come into the room.

“Was a good meeting, Curt.”

Curtis looked up in mild surprise and smiled at him, his eyes glancing at Charlie. “Um, Charlie, this is my good friend, Pete- “

“Oh, I know who he is, Curtis.” Charlie raised an eyebrow. “Pete? Fucking Pete? You couldn’t have picked a better name?”

Frank chuckled, of course she would give him shit for it. “Pickings were slim, sweetheart.”

“Uh-huh. Well, I’m going to take Max and let you and Pete talk for a bit, ‘kay?”

Charlie called Max over to her and Frank stepped towards her, her eyes tracking him. “You don’t have to leave, Charlie.”

The young woman smiled at him and walked towards him with confidence as Curtis watched them. The two had to have history and he was going to get it out of them, one way or another. The colored man watched as the young woman patted Frank’s cheek affectionately and whispered something to him before kissing his cheek, leaving the two men alone after she walked out with the dog.

Curtis sucked in a breath. “Damn, man. You have a way with the ladies? Or do you and her have a past?”

Frank shrugged. “She can answer that, man, can probably tell you the whole story better than I can. I just came by to return your book.”

----------------------------------

Charlie’s phone buzzed as she walked down the street with Max, and she answered. “Hello?”

“How the hell do you know Frank?”

“I thought his name was Pete.”

She heard him sigh and she could see Curtis rubbing his forehead in her mind. “Charlie, how do you know Frank? He said to ask you.”

“Do you know how I got Max?”

“What does Max have to do with anything?”

Charlie looked up at the sky and squinted, trying to find some stars to look at. “Can I come by tonight? I can take a cab. Might even catch Lewis’.”

“I’ll text you when I’m home.”

------------------------------------

Curtis did text her and she did go over.

They sat his table as she slowly and carefully went over their story: the first meeting to Max to her kidnapping, which she can now get through with dissociating, to the trial and all that happened afterward. She went over every detail because Curtis could be trusted. He knew about Frank’s family and all that Frank had done.

Frank trusted him so Charlie did too.

“So let me get this straight. You knew he was the Punisher before anyone else and you still kept him around? I knew you were strange but not that strange.”

Charlie smiled sweetly. “He’s a nice guy and something told me to trust him. I wouldn’t be here without him anyway.”

“You sure this isn’t some Stockholm syndrome or some bullshit rescuer love type thing going on?”

“I’m pretty sure it isn’t but I obviously can’t just go up to my therapist and ask without outing Frank. And I had feelings for him before he came to my rescue, thank you very much.”

Curtis shook his head and wiped a hand over his face, staring her down. She stared back before he sat back in his chair. “Alright. I don’t have a problem with you, but I do have a problem with him leading you on.”

Charlie looked away and Curtis snapped his fingers, pointing at her. “You’ve thought the same thing.”

“Of course, I have. I overthink things. He asked for time, and I’ve given it to him but there is only so much a person can stand, you know. But I can’t tell him that, Curtis. I don’t want to lose him.”

Curtis patted one of her knees. “I’ll talk to him.”

Charlie nodded and got up, bidding Curtis goodbye. He closed the door behind her and rested his head against it.

Of course, Frank went with the woman who had large doe eyes.

Stupid man.

Chapter Text

Charlie didn’t expect to see Frank the next day.

At least not at her doorstep.

She heard Gram talking to someone first outside of their doors and she got really curious as to what the old lady was up to. Looking through her peephole, she almost choked on her own spit to see she was talking to Frank and the man was making conversation back. Actually, he was helping her carry up her groceries and that made Charlie smile. She slowly backed away from the door and bit her lip, waiting for him to come to her.

Because if he went through all this trouble to be here then he had something to say.

She was still startled when there was a knock on her door.

And opening it showed Frank.

Jerking her head, she invited him in with Max greeting the man like he was the best thing ever, the little traitor. She poured him a cup of coffee and handed it to the man, waiting for him to begin speaking.

He cleared his throat before he did. “Look, Charlie, I just wanted to apologize first if you ever had any doubts about me leading you on. It’s, it’s not like, I promise you.”

“Curtis say something, huh?”

Frank chuckled to himself. “Yeah, he did. I’m glad you know each other.”

Charlie smiled. “Even if he’s protective?”

“I wouldn’t want it any other way. He can, he can watch your back when I can’t. If I’m not there, you go to him, you hear?”

The young woman nodded, and Frank muttered under his breath. There was still more that he needed to say, and she could wait, she’d always wait for him.

“Charlie, someone knows I’m alive.”

Her throat threatened to close up.

If someone knew about Frank, they knew what he had done. They could come after him and ruin everything he had accomplished over the year of trying to build a better life for himself. And if they knew about him, did they know about her? She was tied to him because of the sex traffickers but would they come after her? Use her to get to Frank? She-

“Charlie!”

She jolted with a start to find one of Frank’s hands on her arm and the other cupping the back of her neck. Her breathing was becoming erratic, and he squeezed her neck gently. “Hey. Come on back, Charlie. I didn’t mean for you to be put into a fit. I just need to know if you talked to someone about me, let anything slip.”

Charlie didn’t know and she licked her lips. “Not apart from Curtis and Gram. And you trust Curtis and you can trust Gram. Believe me, I may have done some stupid shit when I was younger, but she was way worse, hard to believe she’s lived to be as old as she has. But no, those are the only two. I’ve even been avoiding my therapist, so I don’t have to lie about you or be afraid something slid out.”

Now the gears were turning in Charlie’s head, and she started to overthink, Frank could see it in her eyes. “Shit, Frank, what if someone overheard me? What if I’m being followed? Wouldn’t be the first time it’s happened but what if that’s how someone found out about you?”

Gripping her neck a little tighter, Frank made Charlie look at him. “Hey. Hey. Come on, no one is going to do that, not to you. I just needed to know, okay? This guy knows something about me, something I did, and no one would know about because it was classified. I’m just covering my bases, yeah? No one is going to come for you, I won’t let them.”

Swallowing thickly, she nodded, and he squeezed her neck gently, his hand rubbing her arm. She wasn’t wearing her gloves, so the sensation of skin-on-skin contact sent goosebumps up and down her arms.

Jeez, was she really that touched starved?

 “All you told was Curtis and Gram?”

Charlie looked away from him, her eyes shifting back and forth, like she was trying to remember something. “There’s Karen but I don’t think she would out you. She’s not that type of woman.”

“I’ve already been to Karen, and she wouldn’t. She’s going to help me dig though. You and she have some type of working relationship?”

Nodding, Charlie silently chuckled. “I help her track down people and go to interviews. I’m honestly the worst person for it but we get some shit done.”

Frank nodded, not wanting to let go of Charlie. “So I met the old lady across the hall.”

“Gram.”

Frank laughed. “She’s an interesting one.”

Charlie smiled, a breathless laugh escaping her. “Yeah, yeah, that’s Gram. She’s, um, she’s not what you would expect at first. I once watched her smack someone with her purse for being rude.”

The female glanced behind her into the kitchen, Frank’s hand moving from the back of her neck to the front of it and Frank swallowed hard. When she turned back around her, he cupped her cheek and brought his forehead down to hers. He didn’t know why but forehead touches were always something special to him. He was a handsy kind of guy, but the brief touch of foreheads just did something to him.

Charlie sighed and pressed into the touch, whispering. “I really hate to do this, but I have to leave soon.”

Frank grunted but neither one pulled away, so he kept his voice low when he talked. “Whatcha doing?”

“I started taking self-defense classes and my teacher is curious if gunfire is a trigger for me.”

Pulling back, Frank looked Charlie in the eye. “Why would a self-defense teacher do that?”

Charlie shrugged. “Beats me but it’d be good for me to know. Apparently, some cops are running a simulation and he wants me to come watch, see if I can pick up any hints or whatever.” She smiled teasingly at him. “Or maybe he has the hots for me.”

Frank frowned at that, his blood beginning to boil, but when he saw her smile and heard her tone, he knew she wasn’t being serious.

Charlie sucked in her lips before letting them go with a pop. “I really don’t like the hipster look on you. Give me the military man back.”

He laughed and gave her a kiss on the cheek. They hadn’t kissed since he “came back from the dead” and Charlie was surprisingly okay with it. Frank Castle spoke in gestures, sure, and maybe it would show he cared more but she assumed that the forehead touch thing meant something to him. So, she went with it.

Personally, she’d go along with anything he had in mind, within reason.

He walked towards her door and turned around. “I’ll be seeing you, Charlie Rae.”

“You know where to find me.”

She breathed a sigh of grief when he closed the door behind him.

She had really missed him.

----------------------------------------------------

A team fitted in all black tactical gear with gas masks and rifles made their way through a building. It was dark and they could barely see but they made it work. Not every situation would be easy and in sunlight, but they could make do

Charlie watched this team through a series of TVs, the cameras picking up them up through night vision. Her brows were furrowed as she watched the screens, her eyes tracking their every movement. She wasn’t alone in the tiny TV room, but she was definitely watching the closest. Her instructor, Thomas, was right next to her and she could feel his eyes glancing at her every few seconds, watching.

Thank God one of her triggers was not gunfire.

The exercise was pronounced done when one of the team didn’t shoot his mark and another team member stepped in. The lights came on and Charlie blinked as if to get rid of the focus state she had put herself into. She stayed put as others filed out of the room and the tactical team filed out of the scenario.

They were some of the only ones left in the room when Thomas spoke.

“So, what did you think?”

Charlie smiled at the man. “It was cool and a great experience. Anvil really knows how to make their scenarios realistic. And it’s a win win because I didn’t get triggered.”

She high fived her instructor when he put his hand up as they walked out of the room, and she was about to leave but he called someone over. “Boss, I’d like you to meet one of our self-defense trainees, Charlotte.”

The man who came over had a goatee, hair slicked back and wore a suit. Charlie would be lying if she said he wasn’t attractive and even though he looked like a city slicker, he gave off an aura of precision and tact. He felt like Frank did with a military air and Charlie remembered that most of the employees were former or current military.

The male held out his hand. “Nice to meet you, Charlotte. Billy Russo.”