Archive of Our Own ^beta

Sherlock stormed out of the castle in a fury. He needed to get away. He needed peace from the constant arguments about his “duty” to marry. He ran to the neighboring field and closed his eyes. He smelled the beautiful peonies and felt the sun’s warmth on his face. He stood for a long while listening to the sounds of the forest and the quiet, private peace which enveloped him. When he opened his eyes he saw a beautiful white horse standing in front of him. He was not frightened and did not question where the animal had come from. He reached out his hand slowly and the mare walked to him and pressed its long, delicate nose into Sherlock’s hand. Sherlock stroked the soft mane and spoke to the mare in soft, dulcet tones. The mare was the most beautiful horse he had ever seen and Sherlock felt hypnotized by the piercing, yet gentle eyes that held his gaze. Sherlock trusted this horse so he mounted the mare and rode wildly into the forest. He had not felt this carefree in a long time and suddenly he began to laugh until he cried with pure joy.  He went as far as he could go without caring where he was headed.  He felt like he had been floating in a sea of sadness ever since the unexpected death of his parents. For Sherlock, their deaths compounded the grief that he felt after John disappeared. It was a year since Sherlock had seen him; the last time was in this very forest. They met by the river and they pledged their love for one another. They kissed and Sherlock’s heart had been forever lost to John.  He had not been back to the river since then; he simply could not bear to go there.

Sherlock pulled himself away from his thoughts of John when he was startled to see that he was by the river. It was “their river” and Sherlock shivered – how did the mare know? The chill he felt made his skin feel like it was covered with ice. Just as suddenly, Sherlock felt flushed. He was drawn to the river so he dismounted and went to cool his face in the river’s frigid water. It was then that he saw his image in the rippling water and wondered why he looked different. He quickly pulled away when he saw that someone else was in the image on the river’s water.  Alarmed, Sherlock fell back onto the grass near the river and let the sun’s rays penetrate his face. Tears suddenly poured from his eyes as if the dam in the river had been breached. He flashed to John's face; an image he had recalled so frequently during the past year. Sherlock recalled the first time he had set his eyes on John and he smiled as the coveted image lulled his mind to a state of drowsiness. They had met in these woods.  Just like today, he had been angry and upset because he was to be married to someone he had never even met. The thought of a marriage without love was agonizing to Sherlock. Like today, he had fled from the castle because he could not bear the thought of being wed to someone he did not love. More than anything, Sherlock wanted to be free of his suffocating responsibilities. He wanted to travel the world. So he rode hard and fast hoping to ride into another world; a world of his dreams.

John was also suffering that first day that they met. His parents had died when he was quite young and so his grandfather became both a mother and a father to him. They were of royal blood but times had been hard so they were rather poor. He loathed the duties of royalty and longed to meet the person who he imagined as his soul-mate. More than anything he wanted to help people and he really did not care if he was poor as a consequence. He found himself in the forest more often these days as the drudgery of everyday life weighed him down.

John and Sherlock were occupied with their own thoughts so it was not surprising that they did not see each other. It was an inevitable collision. John fell off of his horse first and then Sherlock fell. They were near and their eyes locked. Sherlock felt as if he had been struck by lightning. Startled, Sherlock sprang to his feet while John groaned in pain on the ground. A few minutes later, John lifted himself off the hard forest ground unable to take his eyes off of Sherlock. So had their courtship and love ignited.

Releasing himself from memories past, Sherlock wondered whether he had indeed seen John’s face in the river’s waters or if he had been enchanted.  Sherlock rubbed his eyes and wondered if he had been dreaming. He went back to the river and peered down once again. He saw John’s face in the water so he reached his hand forward to touch his cheek as he had done so many times in the past. He began to cry with joy only to be sent into a state of despair when the image vanished as he removed his hand from the water. Frantically, he called out to him. All the pain of loss overcame him and he fell back into the grass once again. He felt very tired but now he knew that she could not marry someone he did not love. He resolved to actively search for John because he knew that he loved him and that his life was meaningless without him.  

Sherlock was pulled from his reverie when he heard horse hooves pounding on the soft dirt path. He was startled and worried that the palace guards had come to take him back to the castle.  He could not bear to leave the river just yet so he mounted his horse and quickly cantered away. Before he could escape, his path was cut off by a man riding on a beautiful chestnut horse. Their eyes locked and Sherlock saw that it was John! He trembled as he dismounted and ran forward into John’s arms. They clung tightly to each other without speaking a word. Their eyes met once again and they began to kiss. Before their lips touched, Sherlock heard a large noise and turned his head. He sat up from his place in the grass and rubbed his sleep filled eyes. He saw that the castle guards surrounded him out of concern and relief. Sherlock felt the most profound despair that he had ever felt in his life. He stood up and the guards helped him onto his horse. Sherlock did not know what had happened but he did know that he would return to the castle and announce to all that he would not marry anyone other than John. His heart was heavy but his resolve was strong.

As Sherlock rode with the guards back to the castle, he heard the sound of horse hooves pounding on the soft dirt path. He knew that a rider was approaching.