Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Losing Castiel broke Dean. He wouldn’t dare to admit it but when he heard Castiel’s confession, he felt giddy.

Even after being infatuated and slowly falling in love with the angel, he couldn’t voice out his feelings. All he could feel was his despair as his angel was slowly getting taken away.

A stray tear made its way down his cheek as he fell to his knees. At that moment, nobody except Castiel, his Castiel mattered.

‘Why did everyone end up leaving him?’ Dean thought miserably. He didn’t even realize he had broken down on the floor, sobbing for his lost love.

That was a few months ago. Dean never really recovered from it. He had nightmares of Castiel blaming him for his death, Castiel leaving him and Dean just couldn’t take it anymore. He was depressed and longed to see the angel again, to hear his gravelly voice saying his name, to look into those loving ocean-blue eyes.

Dean had so much to say to him. He closed his eyes and sighed. He was exhausted, tired of living, carrying on and all he could think of was his cas.

He, last night had devised a plan to end this once and for all.

Jack and Sam had gotten settled. Jack being the god while Sam moved out of the bunker to start a new family. No one would miss Dean. It was warranted.

Letters were written, everything was in order and it was time. He grabbed Castiel’s angel blade that had been left behind when he got swallowed by the empty and plunged it directly into his heart. Dean had happy tears in his eyes as they slowly but steadily lost their light.

A moment later, Dean was taken aback as he opened his eyes and found himself in a Victorian-style study of sorts.

In the chair was the original Death, whom Dean had killed a long time ago. “Wha- what? I don’t understand?” Dean stammered as he stared at the ex-pale horsemen.

“Ah yes, Dean Winchester. It’s been a while. Would you care for some pizza freshly prepared from Italy?” Death asked.

Dean looked at him dumbfounded. “Uh no thanks?” Death shrugged. “To each their own I guess.”

Dean frowned. “What I don’t understand is why am I here? Why am I not in the empty?” He questioned, a slight nervousness in his voice.

Death slurped loudly on his coke and gently wiped his face with a handkerchief. “Well, Mr. Winchester we’ve decided to give you another chance at life.” He declared.

Dean looked at him with absolute confusion. “What? What does that even mean? Who’s we? And why?”

Death glanced at Dean. “Well, the universe of course. The empty is tired of keeping up with Castiel. It’s decided you both will go back in time and fix the messes you ended up creating.”

Dean was close to crying. “Y-you mean you’ll give my cas back?” He stuttered, not believing what he was hearing.

Death chuckled. “Yes yes, you’re getting your cas back. Now don’t fail me, Mr. Winchester. I hope to never see you again.”

With a snap of his fingers, Dean found himself back in the bunker, in his room.

Thinking all of it was just a bad dream, he walked out of his room.  He entered the kitchen and noticed it was fully stocked. It was a shocking thing since Dean didn’t feel like eating anymore.

Holding up a cup of coffee, still dressed up in his bathrobe, he walked out of the kitchen into the war room.

“Hello Dean,” the words as simple as they were, made Dean drop his cup of coffee, letting it shatter into tiny pieces.

Dean turned around so fast that it felt as if he got whiplashed. He gazed into the piercing blue eyes of his angel, whom he saw get taken away.

“Cas?” Dean exclaimed. Tears were streaming down his face as he took in the sight in front of him. Castiel was alive. His angel was alive. Dean couldn’t believe it.

“B-but I saw you-“ He stammered, he couldn’t even say it. Castiel was in a similar state, fat tears rolling down his face. But he was smiling. He embraced Dean in a tight hug. Neither of them attempted to break the embrace. Eventually, after what seemed like an hour Dean patted Castiel on his back, breaking away from their passionate hug.

Dean placed his hands on Castiel’s face and leaned in for a rough kiss. Butterflies stirred in Dean’s stomach as his lips neared his. Castiel’s lips were soft, still sweet. He tasted like honey and milk. The taste of his lips, his silky hair, and the way his stubble felt against Dean’s skin. It was all so intoxicating that it made his head spin.

All his troubles were forgotten in the moment and all Dean could think of was his angel. Dean pulled away from the kiss, gasping for air. “Cas- you’re here. You don’t know how much I’ve missed you,” He breathed out.

Castiel smiled. “I’ve missed you too Dean.” Dean laughed joyfully. “You’re back! I never thought you’d wanna see me again.”

“After everything we’ve been through, including my confession to you, Did you really think I would not want to see you?” Castiel huffed. Dean hid his face in Castiel’s chest. Castiel’s hands made their way to Dean’s waist. “I love you too cas,” Dean’s voice came out muffled but was intelligible to make Castiel get the memo.

“I’m sorry. What was that?” Castiel teasingly asked. Dean banged his head on Castiel’s chest. He moved away and gazed into his eyes. “I love you Castiel, more than life itself,” Dean confessed with an almost shy smile.

“And I love you, Dean Winchester.” Castiel looked at the hunter in front of him with pure adoration in his eyes. They both held each other's hands and stared at each other with longing in their eyes for what felt like hours.

“I blamed myself for that day. If you didn’t give yourself up for me you could’ve lived for centuries hell maybe even millennia. I’m-“ Dean’s ramblings were cut off with a kiss from Castiel.

“You should learn how to shut up Dean,” Castiel whispered against Dean’s lips.

Dean pouted. “When did you become this mean Cas?”

Castiel chuckled. “Since I found out that you’re in love with me.” Dean blushed.

“Okay okay! So What’s new with you? Did the empty torture you? Or did you sleep?” Dean asked.

Castiel sighed. “It wasn’t that bad. The Empty and I had struck a deal. So I was essentially handling the empty. I tried to come back to you, believe me, I tried. But the deal prevented me from entering Earth.”

Dean let out a shuddering breath. “I’m so sorry for doing this to you.” Castiel shook his head. “No Dean. The Past shall remain as our past and is not to be fretted upon,” Castiel sternly responded. “Wait- are we missing something? Cas why do you look so young?” Dean exclaimed.

Castiel shrugged. “I haven’t had the time to look at my appearance Dean.”

Dean frowned and suddenly placed his hands on his face. “Wait a fucking minute- where the fuck did my wrinkles go?”

Dean made a run for the bathroom.

“Cas? CAS? CASTIEL!” Dean shouted in a matter of ten seconds.

Castiel shook his head fondly and walked in the direction of Dean. “Yes, Dean. What’s the matter?” He exasperatedly questioned.

Dean stared at him with a look of horror. “CAS I LOOK LIKE A TWINK FROM A BOY BAND! Hell, I look like a Beiber wannabe.” Dean shouted. Castiel snorted.

“THIS IS NOT FUNNY CAS! WHY DO I LOOK LIKE I'M IN MY EARLY TWENTIES?” Dean cried out.

Castiel gave him a classic Sam Winchester-style bitchface #15. “We’re in the past, Dean. Obviously, you’re going to look young.”

“And you didn’t bother telling me when you first saw me?” Dean mumbled.

Castiel shook his head with amusement. “I wanted to watch you panic.”

Dean banged his head on Castiel’s shoulder. “You’re lucky that I love you,” He grumbled.

“What year are we in Cas?” Dean asked with desperation.

“I believe it’s 2002.” Castiel replied with a twitch of his lips. Dean’s panicked stare made Castiel want to laugh.

“It’s alright Dean. Now we can have that nice apple pie life you’ve always wanted. We can go dip our toes in sand at the beach and have hulla- whatever girls you wanted to serve you drinks with umbrellas on. You can become a mechanic and open a shop for that. Death gave us a chance at life, away from hunting and the misery,” Castiel softly said, squeezing Dean’s arm.

A stray tear fell down Dean’s cheek. “I don’t deserve this Cas.” Castiel sighed and enveloped Dean in a tight embrace, who hid his face in Castiel’s shoulder.

“Believe me when I say this Dean. You deserve everything and more. You’ve sacrificed so much to save this world, numerous times. You are a hero, a legend Dean Winchester.” Castiel spoke with a proud smile on his face.

“Never knew that you were such an emotional mess, Dean.” Castiel teasingly nudged Dean, who in turn gasped dramatically. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused,” Castiel retorted with a smirk. He could hear Dean grumbling something about ‘when did he get so sassy?’ And something along the lines of ‘Sassy, Messy, Fucking adorable angels.’

“Now, I’ll be taking you on a date. Oh and Death has kindly given my wings back to me,” Castiel added with a smile.

Dean laughed. “Death, that old chap! He’s awesome. Gimme ten minutes to get ready then you can fly me away?”

Castiel stared at Dean fondly. “I thought you said that you hated ‘angel travel’ and that it didn’t make you poop for a week.”

Dean shrugged. “What can I say? I’m a changed man.”Castiel chuckled. “Whatever you say Dean.”

Chapter Text

Dean rushed to his room and quickly changed into the best clothes he owned. It was obviously his leather jacket and a flannel underneath but it looked flattering on him.

He stared at himself in the mirror with something akin to horror. Younger him looked weird to him. He looked like a twink, had no muscles, scars, he didn’t even have peach fuzz on his face.

He didn’t look like he had seen the true horrors of the world. Dean had fought god, aided in killing him and he lived to tell the tale. But to be back in time, before it all even began? It was downright uncanny valley to him.

He was snapped out of his train of thoughts by Castiel calling out his name. His gravelly voice sent shivers down dean’s spine. He didn’t ever think that he’d able to hear his angel’s voice again. 

Dean walked out of the room and what graced his eyes was his angel dressed in that staple trench coat of his. Dean smiled fondly.

Castiel abruptly touched Dean’s shoulder and frowned. Dean was confused by his gesture. “Everything okay Cas?”

Castiel tilted his head. “You still have my imprint,” He stated, confused. Dean wrinkled his nose. “What do you mean?”

Castiel looked at Dean with a hazy smile as if he was reminiscing about the past. “My handprint from when I gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.”

Dean let out a shocked laugh. “Holy fuck really?” He touches his shoulder with a shuddering breath as if he was holding something dear to his heart. “I missed it you know?”

Castiel’s forehead furrowed. “Really?” Dean grinned. “You mean everything to me dude. That handprint was like a claim. Made me feel like I belonged to you ya know? It got me all tingly and warm.”

A flush crept up Castiel’s face. “Awww is my fearless angel of the lord blushing?” Dean teased Castiel, waggling his eyebrows.

Castiel’s lips turned into a pout. “Blushing is a completely natural reaction.” He argued.

Dean’s mouth twitched. “Whatever you say angel.”

Castiel shook his head. “You’re incorrigible.” Dean huffed a laugh. “Okay dude. Now are we still up for our date or should we just get straight to fucking?”

Castiel’s eyes widened, his face reddened. He took a second to compose himself and shot Dean a smirk. “Are you ready for the dicking that you’re going to get?”

Dean’s jaw dropped in shock as he heard what Castiel said. “Who are you what have you done to my nerdy holy tax accountant of an angel?” Dean spoke, the corner of his lips twitching.

“Nothing that you wouldn’t like.” Castiel said with a wink. Dean blushed. “Now let’s leave,” Castiel added, holding out his hand for Dean.

Dean with absolutely no hesitancy grasped Castiel’s hand, who swept them away to their date night.

Within seconds Dean and Castiel arrived in front of a homey looking diner.

Castiel spoke with a smile. “I’ve heard that this place makes the best pies.”

Dean looked excited. “Man I can’t wait to try all the pies that they have!”

Castiel huffed a laugh. “Let’s do that.” He said as he opened the door to the diner for Dean who gave Castiel an amused expression. Castiel lead them to the booth in the back of the diner.

A waitress stopped by their booth and placed heaps of food on the table. “I-um ordered everything you liked beforehand,” Castiel said with a shy smile.

“I’m so living my broke back mountain dreams.” Dean mumbled under his breath. Castiel’s mouth twitched. Dean raised a brow.

“You were referring to that gay movie with cowboys. Am I right?”

Dean sputtered. “Wha- how?”

Castiel chuckled. “Claire made me watch it. She said ‘I would need it to impress Dean after I confess my undying love for you’ I finally get what she meant by that,” He replied with air quotes.

Dean cackled. “Man I love that kid. She always knew huh?”

Castiel sighed sadly. “Unfortunately we’ll never get to see her again.”

Dean’s face dropped. “I forgot for a second that we’re back in the past. We’ll never get to see our family again. Sammy, Jack, Jody, Alex, Claire, Eileen, Donna,” He muttered gloomily.

Castiel shook his head. “Dean think of it as a new beginning for all of them. I checked for Jimmy Novak as soon as I figured out I was in the past. He’s completely fine. This body is my own. That means Claire is fine. She’d never have to face that terrible fate again. Everyone is alive and doing great. We can always keep an eye out for them. But Jack,” He paused.

“I think he became god the second he took chucks powers. So darkness and Chuck don’t exist anymore. I’m not sure but we’ll have to try to summon him.”

Dean had panic in his eyes. “Cas if we’re back in time that means yellow eyes, Dad and even Jessica are still alive.”

Castiel frowned. “Oh yes. That does cause a slight problem in our retirement plans.”

Dean took a bite out of his cheeseburger and moaned. “Cas this burger is fucking amazing,” He said while still eating which made Castiel snort. “That’s disgusting Dean.”

Dean scoffed. “That’s disgusting Dean,” He mockingly said.

Castiel creased his forehead, his face contorted into a grimace. “You’re lucky I love you.” Dean grinned. “Love ya too Cas.”

After what seemed like eternity of Castiel just staring at Dean, watching him eat and Dean absolutely devouring his food,

Dean patted his stomach. “Man it this is what dates are going to be like with you, I’d love to go on dates with you every single day.”

Castiel blushed. “And I’d love to take you out on dates everyday.”

Castiel, a second later, looked at the waitress and motioned something, who nodded in return.

He got up from where he was seated and held his hand out for Dean. “My gentleman.”

Dean sputtered, he suddenly felt warmth on his cheeks.

“Oh thank you kind sir,” Dean cheekily responded a second later and grasped Castiel’s hand, who pulled Dean close to him, linking their arms together.

“Let’s grab the pies and we’ll head home. Hm?” Castiel said with a nudge to Dean’s shoulder.

Dean shot Castiel a gummy smile and nodded.

Castiel lead them to the counter where six bags were seated. Castiel picked all the bags and with one last nod to the waitress, lead them outside.

Dean frowned. “Wait! Cas didn’t we need to pay?”

Castiel huffed a laugh. “I paid for it beforehand.” Dean snickered. “You’re so cool Cas.” Castiel winked at him. 

Chapter Text

As Dean and Castiel reached the bunker after their cutesy date, Castiel prayed. The situation was tense, nothing like it was a few minutes ago.

Within a matter of seconds, Jack appeared. Dean let out a relieved sigh. “Oh thank fuck it’s you jack.”

Jack smiled. “I wasn’t sure what was going on when you guys appeared here but I can see the death’s mark on you. It’s nice to see you alive, Papa.”

Castiel shut his eyes for a second, trying to hide the tears that were threatening to fall. “Oh Jack..” He stammered. “Come here, kid.” He enveloped Jack in a hug and Dean made his way to join the hug.

Jack giggled, breaking away from the hug. “Oh how much I’ve missed you guys and wow you both look young!”

Dean smirked. “Do we look like fathers of two teens?” Castiel rolled his eyes. Jack huffed a laugh. “You look like a kid yourself.”

There was a moment of silence while Jack analyzed Dean. “You are in deep trouble, Mister.” Dean looked down at the ground in shame. “I had to do it, Jack.”

Jack scoffed. “You could have come to me about this Dad! Do you not consider me your son? You could have told me!” He replied, and angry tears swelled up in his eyes.

Dean melted. “Oh, I’m so sorry my baby. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was not mentally strong and didn’t want to bother you.”

Jack’s expression softened. “You could never bother me, Dad.”

Dean placed a hand on his heart. “You’ve called me dad twice in a row. I think my heart might explode from happiness.”

Castiel swatted his arm and brought Jack in a comforting embrace. “Thank you Jack for understanding. You’re such a good child.” Jack beamed.

Dean cleared his throat. “By the way what’s the situation upstairs?”

Jack waved off. “They don’t know that Chuck is dead or that there’s a new god in the house. And I don’t want to reveal my presence to them right now.”

Dean nodded. “That’s understandable. So the events will occur the same way?”

Jack tilted his head. “Well, you can say they might. But now since you are back in time, you can fix things.”

Dean looked excited. “That just means we can save Sammy’s girl, Claire can have a childhood, Bobby, Ellen, Jo, and Ash will live.” Castiel had a fond smile. “Yes we can darling”

Dean thought he was hearing things. “D-Di-d you just call me darling?”

Jack snickered. “I believe he just did. Dad and Papa sitting under a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage.”

Castiel looked smug while Dean melted into a puddle, pink dusting his cheeks. He looked adorable but at the same time Castiel wanted to ravish him.

Castiel was having sinful thoughts just by staring at his soulmate. How would he look under him? Would he still blush like this? Would he whimper?

Jack was disgusted. “Papa respectfully keep those thoughts away when I’m around. I don’t wanna imagine Dad under you and whimpering or whatever that you’re trying to fantasize about.”

Dean wanted to actually bury himself 6 feet deep. Castiel unabashedly threw a wink at Dean. “Wanna fuck around and find out?”

Dean’s heart couldn’t handle any more surprises. “Where did fuck did my innocent trench coat baby go?”

Castiel snorted. “He’s still there trust me. But in the last months of my life, I studied a lot of slang and watched a lot of movies to woo you.”

Dean let out a giggle-like laugh. “I think I’m still dreaming. What the fuck? I’ve never had such a fun time and I have a fucking kid and the love of my life next to me? That’s all I’ve ever wanted you know.”