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Chapter Text

A sigh escaped Yeonjun; a tiny sound full of fondness as he placed his head in his hand and smiled at the pretty boy seated in front of him.

Said pretty boy was Soobin, Yeonjun’s best friend practically since birth, who had had the audacity to arrive at their study session at the library looking godlike with freshly dyed hair. His previously black hair was now a stark red colour, shining even in the dull light of the library. The fiery red made him look like the main character of a superhero movie, cool and confident and, dare he say it, sexy. It suited him so well, Yeonjun didn’t know what to do with himself.

He realized he must be looking like a lovestruck fool only when Taehyun, who was sitting next to him, pushed his elbow out from under him, causing Yeonjun to drop his head and nearly hit his face on the table. The movement alerted Soobin and Kai on the other side of the table, making them look up from their books. Soobin raised his eyebrows as he noticed Yeonjun rubbing his elbow and glaring at Taehyun, while Kai gave a knowing snort and tried to keep his smile hidden as he continued reading.

As he sent a side-eyed stink eye at Taehyun, Yeonjun felt his phone buzz in his pocket.

Tyunnie

Sorry, but you were a bit too obvious.

I can basically smell the awe on you, you should be happy Soobin’s on the other side of the table

Yeonjun’s veins froze to ice in an instance at the prospect of being caught. He really was the worst at keeping his emotions hidden.

Grumpy hyung 

Fuck, you’re right, I zoned out

Do you think he won’t notice?

Despite having grown up with them, Yeonjun was a master at forgetting the fact that two of his best friends were not of the same species as him. It still surprised him when the two alphas brought up any aspect of their non-humanness, such as the fact that they were much more sensitive to sounds and smells than humans.

Tyunnie

If he didn’t notice yet I don’t think he will

Grumpy hyung

Good

You can’t blame me for staring though

The red hair??? He looks so good wtf

Tyunnie

You should tell him that, not me

Yeonjun looked up to meet Taehyun’s eyes, dramatically rolling his own in response, before turning his attention over to Soobin.

“Hey Bin-ah,” he said, pausing to wait for Soobin to look at him. “I love what you did to your hair. You didn’t tell me you would dye it.”

And considering Yeonjun and Soobin spent most of their days together and told each other everything, he thought it was a bit weird that he hadn’t know about Soobin’s change of hair colour beforehand.

“Ah,” Soobin said, a small blush creeping up his neck. “It was a spur of the moment kind of thing. I wanted to surprise you, anyways, that’s why I didn’t say anything.”

Yeonjun hummed in understanding. He noticed Soobin’s blush and couldn’t help smiling. Soobin liked to convince himself and others around him that he was a big, matcho alpha, tall and broad enough to intimidate people on sight, but Yeonjun knew better. In his eyes, Soobin would always be cute.

“Does it look good?” Soobin touched his hair self consciously, waiting for Yeonjun’s praise that he probably knew was going to come. Yeonjun was predictable like that.

“Is the sky blue?” Yeonjun joked. “You look great. I’m actually a bit jealous, you’re gonna steal all the attention away from me now.”

He could sense Taehyun and Kai sharing a look and pretending to gag in their seats, but since Soobin ignored them, he chose to do the same.

“I don’t know about that,” Soobin mumbled, looking away.

It would always flabbergast Yeonjun that Soobin kept refusing to take his compliments at face value. No matter how many times Yeonjun had told him that he was pretty, handsome, gorgeous, the depiction of his ideal style, Soobin never accepted a compliment without protesting. Maybe he saw it as Yeonjun being the supportive best friend, giving compliments just for the sake of Soobin’s confidence, when the truth was that Yeonjun was just incapable of keeping his attraction to Soobin silent.

They stayed in the library trying to study for maybe half an hour more before it became too obvious that none of them were being productive. Kai had been playing a game on his phone for the last ten minutes, while Yeonjun and Taehyun had been throwing small paper balls and trying to get them to stick in Soobin’s hair. The funniest part was that Soobin was doing his best to ignore them, while at the same time allowing it to happen as he kept on reading his book.

At some point, though, Soobin seemed to have had enough. “Okay guys,” he said, straightening in his seat and closing his book in one go. He leaned his head forward and shook his hair out, causing at least ten paper balls to fall onto the table. Raising his head, he sent an amused look Yeonjun’s way. “It’s almost seven, we should head out before it gets too late.”

As always, what Soobin said became law, and the three of them quickly packed up their things to follow Soobin’s lead. When they stood, Yeonjun and Taehyun giggled as Soobin turned around and still had a few balls stuck in his hair.

A few minutes later, the group walked into their favourite restaurant, which also happened to be the closest one to their campus.

While Taehyun and Kai discussed what they should get, Soobin offered to order for Yeonjun.

“Oh, yeah sure,” he answered. “I want—”

“I know,” Soobin said with a smirk, leaving them to find a table as he approached the counter to order. Yeonjun watched him, gaping. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that Soobin knew his order; with how often they came there, and with Yeonjun always ordering the same thing – a bowl of tonkotsu ramen – probably all his friends knew his preferred order here. Still, Soobin was the only who offered to order for him, and that made that familiar sparkling feeling erupt in his chest.

Yeonjun didn’t even realize he was staring at Soobin once again until Kai cleared his throat very indiscreetly to catch his attention.

“What?” he asked, turning his head only to frown as he caught sight of his two friends smirking at him.

“You should fix your face before Soobin-hyung comes back, your pining is showing,” Kai teased.

Yeonjun slapped Kai on the shoulder before turning around to make sure Soobin hadn’t heard him. Being the only other human of their group, Kai also tended to forget that alphas and omegas not only had better sense of smell than humans, but also better hearing. Thankfully, Soobin showed no sign of having overheard Kai.

Out of his two other best friends, Kai was more adamant on teasing Yeonjun about his crush on Soobin. It was mostly small things, like sending knowing looks Yeonjun’s way when Soobin did something fairly attractive. When Soobin was not in the room, however, he could get more vocal about it. Yeonjun wouldn’t say he loved it, but since he knew that Kai had no malicious intent with his teasing, he tolerated it.

Yeonjun’s slap led Kai to try to get back at him and ended with Yeonjun shrieking and running out of the way as Kai tried to hit his butt. Taehyun watched them with a shake of his head, doing nothing to stop them and instead going to grab a table.

A moment later, Yeonjun and Kai called truce and followed Taehyun. With a sigh, Yeonjun relaxed in his seat. He glanced over at the queue, where Soobin seemed to have reached the front to order and was hit by another wave of affection for his best friend.

“Hyung, you’re doing it again.” This time it was Taehyun who reminded him.

Pouting, Yeonjun dragged his eyes over to his younger friends and let out a longing sigh. “I just can’t help it; he looks so good in that colour.”

Taehyun and Kai shared a look of disgust, before Taehyun snorted. “Sure,” he said, which would have earned him a glare from Yeonjun due to his sarcastic tone, if he hadn’t continued. “In fact, he looks so good it seems the new cashier is flirting with him.”

“What?!”

Yeonjun straightened in his seat, alerted. When he looked Soobin’s way Soobin earlier, he hadn’t bothered to notice the way the girl behind the counter was batting her eyes at him, her smile much bigger than her job required.

“Wanna bet if she’s going to give him her number?” Kai asked as all of them stared at the encounter several meters away.

“I bet ten thousand won that he accepts it without even realising what it is,” Taehyun said confidently.

“That’s what I was gonna say,” Kai whined. Yeonjun ignored their continued playful bickering, his eyes glued to Soobin’s back.

He knew he was being ridiculous, caring so much about who Soobin was talking to and if he was being flirted with. Despite knowing that, he couldn’t help the ball of jealousy growing in his stomach, and his stare quickly turned into a glare directed at the cashier.

Soobin handed over the money, finally paying for their order, and Yeonjun assumed he would come back to the table then. To his surmise, however, Soobin just took a sidestep and followed the girl as she relayed the order to the chefs.

Did Soobin enjoy talking to her? Why couldn’t he just come back to the table and wait for their food like a normal person?

The worst thing was, there wasn’t any other customer in sight, the queue painfully non-existent, leading to Soobin and the pretty cashier’s conversation to be undisturbed for far too long.

An idea popped up in Yeonjun’s head that he immediately acted on. “Hey, what are you guys ordering?” he asked his friends, barely glancing at them as he asked. They stopped bickering about their bet and gave Yeonjun funny looks which he did not notice.

“I haven’t decided, but I might go with the ribs—” Taehyun said, and before he could finish Yeonjun cut him off.

“Great! Kai?”

“Uh, I was thinking the ramen soup, I guess…”

“Perfect! I’ll order for you.”

He ignored their stares that turned into knowing looks as he jumped to his feet and approached his red-haired friend by the cashier.

“-yeah, it’s definitely one of my favourites,” he heard the girl –Yeji, her name tag said– say as he came up to Soobin’s side. They were clearly in the middle of the conversation, but Yeonjun couldn’t care less if it was rude of him to interrupt. He just wanted Soobin away from her flirtatious gaze.

“I want to order,” he said, catching both by surprise and successfully interrupting the conversation.

Soobin sent him a confused look, “Hyung, I already ordered for you—” he began, but Yeonjun was too occupied staring the girl down to listen.

“One Ramen soup and one Ribs,” he said, glaring at her as she nodded with wide eyes and wrote it down on a piece of paper.

“What would you like to drink?” she asked, her smile a bit less sweet than previously as she glanced from Soobin to Yeonjun. For a moment, Yeonjun fought his instincts to pull Soobin to his side to show her who he belonged to.

Soobin doesn’t belong to you, a voice in his head reminded him.

“One cola and one sprite,” he answered simply, ignoring how Soobin kept looking at him questioningly from the side.

“Is that all?” Yeji asked, her expression a bit uncomfortable now. Part of Yeonjun felt bad for it – he wasn’t a total asshole, after all – but the other, more substantial part was glad he got her to stop flirting with Soobin.

“Yes, that’s all.” When she nodded and punched in the order in the register, telling him the amount, he added a “thank you,” just to show he did still have his manners.

Once he had paid and they got their drinks, he caught Soobin’s eyes on him as they went to grab utensils and napkins.

“What?” he asked, knowing Soobin tended to keep quiet when he was bothered by something.

“What got you in such a sour mood?” Soobin asked, glancing back at Yeji who was looking sideways at them as she walked to the kitchen.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Yeonjun said, faking nonchalance. He was still a bit riled up, and as usual, he had trouble coming back down.

“Sure,” Soobin said, dragging out the syllable. “But you were a bit… curt with her, don’t you think?”

Well, yeah, he knew that. But… he couldn’t exactly admit that without explaining why that was.

“Ah,” he said, biting his lips as he avoided Soobin’s eyes. He grabbed four pairs of chopsticks, then turned around to face him. “Was I? I didn’t mean to.” Wow, he was such a liar. “Kai just said something that annoyed me.”

“Oh,” Soobin looked less wary now, a small smile creeping up on his face. “Really? What’d he say?”

Waving his hand, Yeonjun said, “It was stupid, really.” And just because Soobin looked back at the girl a bit guiltily, he added, “should I apologise?”

He really didn’t want to apologise. But, well, if Soobin wanted him to, then…

Soobin chuckled, shrugging. “I don’t think it was that bad. But you did kind of interrupt our conversation.”

“Really? What were you talking about?”

Pointing at his hair, Soobin explained. “She commented on my hair, said I reminded her of a character in an anime she liked. And, you know I love anime, so we just talked about that until you came up.”

“Oh.” Yeonjun felt stupid now. Maybe she hadn’t been flirting with him after all. “That’s nice.” He gave a small smile, but when Soobin looked away, he shifted his gaze back to the girl. She wasn’t looking at them, but he could tell from the way she was faced that she was keeping an eye on them at the edge of her vision. “Let’s head back to the table, the food will probably take a while.”

Soobin agreed, and followed Yeonjun’s lead when the girl’s voice reached them.

“Wait!” she called, and when the two turned to look back, it was obvious she was talking to Soobin.

As Soobin made to walk back to her, he motioned for Yeonjun to just go back to their friends. Despite not wanting to leave Soobin with her again, he reluctantly did so.

“You ordered for us?” Taehyun asked when he sat back down in his seat, his eyes still glued to Soobin. He hummed in response. “And you paid?” Another hum.

“I didn’t know jealous-Yeonjun-Hyung was this generous,” Kai said, grinning at the thought of not having to pay for his food.

“Oh shut it, or I’ll make you pay me back,” Yeonjun spat, turning his head to glare at them when they laughed at him.

Taehyun leaned forward to pat Yeonjun’s hand, his evil grin turning gentle. “Sorry, Hyung, you’re just too easy to rile up, we can’t help it.” He then leaned back, and Yeonjun was grateful when he changed the subject. It was only then he had time to realize his cheeks were burning, against his will. He hoped it wasn’t noticeable.

“You wanna hear what our professor did when Kai fell asleep in his class today?”

Yeonjun very much wanted to hear about that, considering Taehyun often had fun stories to tell about Kai getting into trouble in class. Kai tended to be a bit of a slouch, never taking his classes or professors seriously. It was honestly baffling to Yeonjun how someone like Kai, who hated all things school related, was studying physics, one of the school’s hardest programs. But when he had asked Taehyun how Kai was going to pass the first year with how much he hated studying, he had shrugged and said Kai that was just that smart.

Despite them being only a few weeks into this semester, it seemed like Kai had already gotten in his professor’s bad book. Taehyun dived into a dramatic retelling of how their professor had caught Kai sleeping and proceeded to stare at him for a minute until Taehyun nudged Kai awake, which was followed by a long rant about disrespectful students and how anyone that lacked the decency to stay awake during lectures were bound to fail in life.

In the end, Yeonjun was crying with laughter, and he didn’t even notice it had been a while since he left Soobin behind at the counter before his tall friend reappeared by their table.

“Ah, Binnie!” he exclaimed, smiling up at his friend who slowly sat down in the seat next to him. His sour mood from earlier was gone with the wind, and all he felt when looking at Soobin was fondness.

Always in need of closeness, he scooted closer and linked his arm with Soobin’s as soon as Soobin’s butt hit the chair. Then, he noticed the sheepish look on Soobin’s face, and squinted at him. “Something wrong?”

He followed Soobin’s eyes down to the receipt in his hand. His first thought was that it came out more expensive than Soobin had thought, but it didn’t make sense since he knew Soobin was never one to complain about money. Then, his eyes fell on the little hand scribbled note at the bottom of the paper, which caused him to suck in a loud breath (he did not gasp) that alerted their other friends.

Kai was quick to grab the receipt from Soobin’s hand, letting out a cheer when he saw what it was.

“The cashier gave you her number?” Taehyun asked, eyebrows shooting up in a mix between surprise and delight. But that was before he saw the pouty look on Yeonjun’s face.

Disgruntled, Yeonjun leaned away, letting his arm slip out from Soobin’s. He tried to not make it noticeable how displeased (one might even say jealous) he was, he really did. Thankfully, Soobin was looking down at the receipt, unlikely to notice Yeonjun’s expression.

“Yeah, she did,” Soobin said, sounding like he didn’t believe it. “It was a bit of a surprise, I thought she just wanted to talk more about anime… but she said I forgot this and asked me to text her.”

Taehyun snorted and pointed at Kai. “You owe me ten thousand won,” he said, triumphantly. Kai groaned and tried arguing that it wasn’t fair, while Soobin looked at them with confused eyes.

“So, are you?” Yeonjun heard himself say, bringing Soobin’s attention to him as the younger two once again started bickering.

“Am I what?” Soobin asked, now glancing at Yeonjun with wide eyes.

“Are you gonna text her?”

“Oh.” Soobin looked down at his hands for a moment. He carefully glanced towards the counter, where the girl seemed to have disappeared into the kitchen. “I mean, I don’t think so.”

“Why not? She’s pretty, isn’t she?” Yeonjun didn’t know why he was pushing him, making it sound like he thought Soobin should do it. He just… he was a bit upset, jealousy and sadness brewing in his stomach and making him act harshly.

“Y-yeah, she is. But I don’t know. I’ll think about it, I guess.” Soobin shrugged, his eyes flickering away from Yeonjun’s face almost nonchalantly.

Yeonjun didn’t push, didn’t even know why he asked in the first place since the mere thought of hearing Soobin talking about that girl made his chest hurt. Dating and emotions was something he and Soobin almost never talked about with each other, perhaps for that exact reason. On his own end, it was pretty clear why he never talked about his feelings. Soobin on the other hand was a bit of a mystery sometimes. He wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable talking about it, it was just that he never did. At least not with Yeonjun.  

He wished he knew why. But he also never knew how to bring it up, so he just let it keep on going as it was.

Sometimes it saddened him that there were things he couldn’t talk to his best friend about. At the same time, he wasn’t nearly brave enough to confess, and he had long ago come to terms with Soobin not feeling the same way.

Thankfully, he had Taehyun and Kai to rant about his feelings whenever he needed to.

Speaking of Taehyun, Yeonjun could tell that he was watching them with calculating eyes. He always had a good eye when it came to Yeonjun’s bad moods, making sure to always check that Yeonjun was alright whenever stuff like this seemed to affect him.

A raised eyebrow from Taehyun was question enough, and Yeonjun nodded tiredly in response. He was fine. Not much worse than usual, at least.

A waiter – not the girl from before, thankfully – arrived with their food. As they ate their food, the conversation shifted to something less anxiety inducing for Yeonjun, and he managed to keep his mood up for the entire meal. He of course couldn’t forget about the number that was still sitting on the piece of paper that Soobin had pushed into his pocket, or the words Soobin had said, but he decided not to dwell on it for now.

Later that night, after they went their separate ways, Yeonjun found himself staring up at his bedroom ceiling, mind too awake and buzzing to fall asleep.

The entire scene from earlier kept replaying in his mind, the way he reacted to Soobin being hit on making him cringe in shame. Why did he have to get so angry and sensitive every time someone showed interest in Soobin?

Well, it wasn’t like he didn’t know the answer to that one. It was obvious that he wanted soobin’s attention to be on him and only him.

He hated that his feelings got him behaving like this. Poor Soobin. And poor girl behind the register. Yeonjun hadn’t even memorized her name. Shit, he felt like such a douchebag.

There was nothing to do but push the shame down and move on, though. What’s done is done, and all that. He just… had to try not to do the same thing the next time someone hit on Soobin. But as he saw today, he has little control over himself when the jealousy takes over.

Fuck, he just hoped Soobin didn’t catch onto why Yeonjun was behaving like that. It didn’t seem like he did. It was like Taehyun said about his scent that morning: if Soobin hadn’t noticed it yet, he was probably not going to figure it out. 

He could be dense like that sometimes, Choi Soobin. Never the one to understand other people’s advancements unless they literally spelled it out to him. It was one of the most endearing and frustrating things about him, how he always seemed so surprised when learning that someone liked him.

That was something Yeonjun truly would never understand. Soobin was such a catch, literally his dream partner, and he struggled to see why people would be interested in him? 

Well, maybe Yeonjun shouldn’t complain too much. So far, Soobin hadn’t accepted any of the advances he’d been given, always turning down the ones that asked him out. But one of these days, he might. In fact, Yeonjun couldn’t know for sure that Soobin wasn’t going to text the girl from today. 

Sure, he’d said he didn’t think he would, but what if he changed his mind?

The mere thought of Soobin sending her a text and it leading to them going on a date had Yeonjun’s anxiety boiling up inside him. Because even though Yeonjun hated the thought, and his mind immediately tried to think of ways to prevent that from happening, deep down he knew that he didn’t have any claim over Soobin. If his best friend wanted to date her, if he really was interested in her, then it wasn’t Yeonjun’s business 

Rationally, he knew that. But his body didn’t care about rationality. He was still filled with jealousy when other people looked at Soobin with interest. 

Like many nights before, he ran over his mental list of reasons why he and Soobin would never become a thing. Was it to torture himself? Maybe. But he liked to think that if he kept telling himself that he was crushing on someone unobtainable, then maybe one day his feelings would fade away.

So far, it hadn’t worked very well.

The first and most obvious reason why he never expected anything to happen between them was also the simplest one: Soobin just didn’t like him that way.

Now, there had been a time where he had dared to hope that he might’ve had a chance. That even if Soobin didn’t like him, he could come to do so in the future. But that was years ago, when they were not in uni and they were young and innocent, before Yeonjun realized just how serious his crush was.

Soobin had always been the most comfortable around him, growing confident and open as long as Yeonjun was by his side. He was also much more lenient on Yeonjun than any of their other friends, letting him play pranks and do whatever he did as long as it made Yeonjun happy.

Soobin used to be extremely shy, but somehow he blossomed out around Yeonjun. He avoided hugs and rarely initiated any close touch unless he was forced into it. 

Only, with Yeonjun he was different. Somehow, Yeonjun was the only exception. Where he might’ve pushed Taehyun off, Yeonjun could hang and cling onto Soobin without a word of protest being uttered from the tall boy. Thus, Yeonjun’s hopes of Soobin feeling the same type of affection for him grew the more he was noticing it.

It took one conversation about sexuality to squash Yeonjun’s hopes and dreams.

They had been at Soobin’s parents’ house for a sleepover, the two of them and Taehyun. Yeonjun had been maybe 14 years old at that time. He couldn’t remember how they had come upon this topic, but he knew it started when Tae admitted he liked guys more than girls. Perhaps he had had a crush on someone and couldn’t help telling them, or something. The details weren’t important. However, it led them onto the path of talking about their sexuality, during which Yeonjun admitted to mainly liking guys. That’s when Soobin said he liked girls. Period.

Okay, he didn’t say period. He said, “I like girls. Haven’t thought much about my sexuality, really.” The fact that he said that immediately after Yeonjun admitted to being gay was like a punch to the throat, a hard wake up call for his hopeful heart.

He used to think about it a lot, back then. How Soobin said it so easily, that he didn’t seem to have struggled like he and Taehyun had with coming to terms with their sexuality.

Since then, he’d had to accept that Soobin was straight and thus incapable of falling for him. Still he couldn’t get himself to stop loving his best friend like that. He tried dating other people, going on a few dates here and there and even being in a long-term relationship with a guy his first year of university. It sufficed to say, it didn’t last long, because he could never give as much of his affection to his then boyfriend as he did to Soobin.

So that was the second reason, the devastating truth that should have made Yeonjun accept his fate and move on. 

The third point on the list was this: Yeonjun was a human, Soobin was a werewolf.

“That’s a stupid, old-school argument,” Taehyun would argue whenever Yeonjun brought it up. And he knew that the fact that they were of different species shouldn’t really matter. It had been years and years since interspecies relationships were viewed in an unnatural light, and it wasn’t like they were less common than queer relationships nowadays either.

Deep down, Yeonjun could admit that he knew that Soobin didn’t care much about the species of the person he would end up with. He had basically said so outright to Yeonjun once. It was just that… his family did care. A lot. His parents were very sold on having Soobin, their only son – and an alpha, on top of that – mate an omega that could carry on their bloodline.

“Soobin’s parents love you,” would be Taehyun’s next argument. “They wouldn’t care if he was with you.”

No, Yeonjun knew they wouldn’t hate him. If Soobin somehow miraculously started liking guys and by extent fell in love with Yeonjun, they wouldn’t turn Soobin away for being with him. But they would be disappointed. Never truly satisfied. They would probably never get over Soobin not mating and forming a family with an omega. And Soobin would constantly feel their disappointment, which would affect him for the rest of his life.

Not only that, Yeonjun also knew that a relationship between alpha and omega was special in a way interspecies relationship never could be. Creating a mating bond with another werewolf was like creating a soul link, like becoming one with the person you were in love with. That was something precious, something that Soobin deserved the chance to experience. He always felt extremely guilty every time he wished Soobin would fall in love with him because he knew it meant he would rob Soobin of that connection. 

Rolling around in bed, Yeonjun threw his arm over his head and tried to force his mind to quiet down. This was not helping. He could almost hear his own heart breaking, the anxiety in his chest making it feel like something inside of him was trying to claw its way out. 

This was the problem with trying to be realistic. It had the consequence of making himself feel like shit, most of the time. 

And the worst part about trying to convince himself that he and Soobin didn't work with his little list was that for every argument they wouldn’t work, there was a thousand ones for why they would. There was a reason why Yeonjun had fallen so deeply in love with his best friend, after all.

“Ah shit,” Yeonjun muttered up at the dark ceiling above him after having rolled around, an unsatiated sadness brewing in his chest preventing him from falling asleep. He hated nights like these, where he’d toss and tumble as he tried to distract his mind from these types of thoughts.

It seemed like he wasn’t going to get much sleep tonight. It sucked, but it wasn’t like this was the first night he lay awake thinking about Soobin. It sure wouldn’t be the last.

-

Chapter Text

Begrudgingly, Yeonjun had to pull himself out of bed early the next morning after getting at most 3 hours of sleep. Taehyun, the only other morning person in their group and therefore the only one with morning classes that day, picked him up as usual in his car. He could immediately tell the level of Yeonjun’s sleeplessness and suggested getting coffee on the way.

“Yes please,” Yeonjun groaned as he lay against the window with his eyes closed, trying to get in as much rest as he could. He’d barely had energy to dress himself, let alone style himself to perfection as per usual during his mornings. So far, he didn’t regret the extra ten minutes of sleep, but he knew that once he saw Soobin he was going to feel like an ogre.

Well. Soobin had seen him in many unflattering situations over the years, he told himself. This would not be his worst look.

When he opened his eyes what felt like seconds later, they had arrived at school, and Taehyun was unbuckling his belt for him. “We’re here, Hyung,” he said with a chuckle.

“I hate morning classes,” Yeonjun muttered, grabbing the belt as it moved back toward its holster and hugging it like a plushie.

“No, you don’t,” Taehyun reminded him. “You say they’re a great way to get you out of bed at a reasonable time, and it’s much nicer to have your afternoons free because then you get more free time.”

“Uuugh,” Yeonjun grumbled, annoyed at his own words being used against him like this. “I knooow. I just hate it today.”

“Couldn’t sleep?” Thankfully, Taehyun knew Yeonjun didn’t function without sleep, so he didn't seem bothered by his sour mood.

“Mhm. Kept on tossing and turning until like four.”

“Well, our classes start in 10, so whether you like it or not, we gotta get going.” Taehyun pulled on Yeonjun’s arm to get him into a sitting position. “Here,” he said, and just as Yeonjun opened his eyes, a large cup of steaming coffee was pushed into his hands.

Yeonjun was quick to take his first sip. “Tae, I love you,” he sighed in relief.

Chuckling at him, Taehyun patted his head before getting out of the car. After a few more sips, Yeonjun followed.

They went their separate ways in the hallway; Taehyun wishing Yeonjun good luck with keeping his eyes open for the upcoming lecture. Yeonjun prided himself with getting through his first two lectures without problem. And without problem, he meant without falling asleep. He might not have been as alert as usual, not answering any questions posed by his professors and barely managing to keep up with the notetaking, but he was awake, nonetheless.

He also managed to sneak to the bathroom and fix his hair during one of the breaks, so that he wouldn’t have to face Soobin at lunch with a bird’s nest on his head.

On his way out of his last lecture before lunch, chatting with his classmate Changbin, he noticed a colorful poster in passing and did a double take, stepping back to take a better look at it.

“Queer night,” Changbin read with interest, looking at Yeonjun with raised eyebrows.

“Sounds like our kind of night, right?” Yeonjun mused as he leaned in to read the details.

This ‘Queer night’ seemed to be an event that would take place this Friday on the school’s nightclub. It was free entrance, there was a dress code to follow, and there would ‘flamboyant drinks’ and music only from queer artists.

“Dude, that sounds great,” Yeonjun said, grinning in excitement. “Do you wanna go?”

Changbin mirrored his smile back at him, but then his face fell when he seemed to recall something. “Oh no… I think Felix wants me to go to his parents’ house on Friday… I kind of promised.”

Yeonjun snickered. “Well, at least you’ll have a bit of a queer night yourself, considering you’re spending it with your boyfriend.”

“And his parents,” Changbin emphasized. “But ah… I wish I could go. It’s not that often they organize stuff like this, is it?”

Yeonjun agreed. There were always parties, often with special themes, but this was the first time he’d seen one directed towards people like them. He had to say, he was kind of touched.

“If you go, you’ll have to tell me all about it,” Changbin said as they started walking again.

“Of course. But I’ll have to see if I can get my friends to go with me. I’m not going alone.”

-

Maybe he would have no other choice than to go alone, if his friends continued being so stubborn.

“What do you mean you don’t know if you want to go?” he demanded, staring at Taehyun who he at least would have guessed would be the one on his side.

“There’ll be a lot of gay people there—” Taehyun started, but Yeonjun interrupted him.

“Tae, you’re gay.”

“I know—you didn’t let me finish! There will be a lot of people; what if they hit on me?”

They were sitting on a bench outside of school, sipping on a soda each. Their classes had finished an hour ago, but they were waiting for Kai and Soobin so they could go home and play video games together. Normal after-school behaviour.

Yeonjun stared at his friend in disbelief. “How is that a problem?”

“I don’t want to be hit on by drunk people!”

Well, okay, Taehyun was objectively very attractive, so his fears weren’t exactly unfounded. But still, it sounded a bit ridiculous to his ears. “Well, if that’s the only thing holding you back, I’ll be your anti-wingman. How does that sound?”

“Anti-wingman?” Taehyun gave him a sceptical look. He took a sip of his soda, slurping loudly as if to fill the air with something as he thought about it.

“Yeah,” Yeonjun said, waiting for an answer. When it didn’t come, he tried to explain it a bit more. “You know, if there’s anyone that hits on you or that makes you uncomfortable, I’ll come in and swoop you away, or offend them so much that they leave, or whatever is needed.”

That made Taehyun laugh a little, which Yeonjun took as a good sign.

“I just really want to go,” he continued, a pleading tone to his voice. “Please don’t make me go alone.”

“Have you even asked Soobin or Kai yet?”

“No, but you’re my only other queer friend, so of course I want you with me there.”

Tae narrowed his eyes at him, his expression holding some kind of meaning Yeonjun couldn’t grasp. Before he could ask Taehyun why he was giving him that weird look another voice from behind him joined in their conversation.

“Whatcha talking about?” Kai said as he plopped down in the seat next to Taehyun, nearly knocking over Yeonjun’s soda can on the bench.

“Yeonjun wants to go to some party on Friday,” Taehyun quickly explained.

“Uh huh,” Kai said as he grabbed Yeonjun’s can and took a sip. Yeonjun didn’t care enough to stop him, at this point. “What kind of party?”

“Well, it’s a ‘Queer party’” Yeonjun said. “It’s basically supposed to be something for us queer people to get a bit more comfortable, the entrance is free, there will be music, and there might even be a drag show I think I read-“

“What’s this about a drag-show?”

Yeonjun nearly jumped as he heard Soobin’s familiar voice just behind him. He turned, facing his red-haired friend who had an amused look on his face.

“Yeonjun-hyung wants to go to a queer party on Friday,” Kai told him before Yeonjun could, and he cringed slightly when he saw Soobin frown in confusion.

“Queer party?”

“Well, it’s basically a party at the nightclub with a queer theme,” Yeonjun said, trying to explain it as simply as possible.

“Oh? This Friday?”

“Yeah.”

They all looked at each other, and Yeonjun felt awkward for bringing it up now. Maybe he should’ve sent the picture of the poster in their group chat, to give them a heads up.

“If you guys don’t wanna go, it’s fine,” Yeonjun said after it was silent for a minute. He tried not to sound too deflated, but they could probably tell he was bummed about it.

“We never said that,” Soobin commented, causing Yeonjun to snap his head in his direction. “It sounds like fun.”

Yeonjun was about to say he didn’t even tell him much about the party when Tae jumped in.

“I’ll go, if you keep your word about what you said before.”

Kai and Soobin gave them questioning looks but didn’t ask any further questions.

“Well, I’m going if all of you are going, of course,” Kai said, and then it was decided. They were going to the Queer night on Friday.

-

It soon dawned on Yeonjun that his friends might not live up to the dress code for the party. While it wasn’t too strict, there were instructions to ditch the black and white and dress as ‘preposterous as possible’. He would have no problem following that himself, since his wardrobe was filled with colour, but his three best friends were a different matter.

He voiced his concerns to them after school on Thursday, the day before the party.

Kai tried to convince him that it wouldn’t be a problem, but Yeonjun knew better. While Kai was not like Soobin, who shifted almost entirely between white, black and grey clothes – except a few hoodies he’d been gifted by Yeonjun – Yeonjun was sure the colourful clothes Kai owned would not be provoking enough for this type of party.

“I’m not trying to offend any of you,” he told them, “but you need to go shopping with me. If we’re gonna follow a queer dress code, I’m your best shot here.”

What ensued after that was a lot of complaining and offended noises, but eventually they had agreed to let Yeonjun choose the clothes for them. Thus, they took Taehyun’s car to the closest shopping mall, in search of the best shop to start their search.

Two hours later, Yeonjun and Soobin was standing in a dressing room; Soobin in one of the booths and Yeonjun just behind the door. The other two had gone off on their own after the first hour, since they had already found at least a shirt each and thought they could find pants on their own (“I’m gay as well, I think I can tell what’s gay enough for the ‘queer night’,” Taehyun had said when Yeonjun nagged on them for wanting to leave, but he promised to at least send pictures before any of them bought any other items).

It was both easier and harder to be alone with Soobin looking for clothes. Easier, because he only needed to think about one person instead of three, and he could focus on what would look good on Soobin’s body shape. Harder, because he had to watch Soobin try on every queer-coded outfit he gave him, which was a bit dangerous for his heart.

The latest outfit he had Soobin try on was a pink crop top together with a chequered skirt, a corset, and black pants underneath.

When he stepped out of the booth, Yeonjun nodded slowly, his fist in front of his mouth.

“What do you think?” Soobin asked shyly, holding onto the hems of the skirt as he stood before Yeonjun’s judging eyes.

“It fits nice, but like I thought the pink is the wrong shade, it doesn’t really go with your hair. How does it feel?”

Soobin dropped the skirt and straightened a bit, then looked back at himself in the mirror inside the booth. “I… I like the skirt, I think. And this,” he thumbed at the corset around his middle, “feels quite nice, actually.”

“Mm, I think the lower part is good, but let me just…” he held up a finger to tell Soobin to wait, and then he ran back out into the shop. He had seen a shirt before that he had liked but thought that since they needed color it wouldn’t work. It was a black shirt with holes along the seams where the arms began, which he thought would look very nice together with the skirt. He grabbed it quickly, but hesitated once he realized Soobin’s entire outift would be black if he took this.

Well, Soobin’s hair was red, maybe that would be enough, he hoped, as he brought the shirt with him.

“Try this on,” he told Soobin, handing the top over. Soobin eyed the item with interest before nodding and going back into the booth.

As he waited, Yeonjun sat down on the chair just outside the booth. From there, he could see Soobin’s feet move underneath the door, but not much more.

“Hyung?” Soobin asked after a minute.

“Yeah?” Yeonjun straightened in his seat, prepared in case Soobin needed his help.

“You said it was supposed to be provoking, right?”

“Uh, yeah. Why?”

“Well, this is pretty dark and covers almost all my skin, but what if I had some kind of net tights instead of these pants?”

Yeonjun took the words in, and instantly he could see the image of Soobin in fish net tights in his mind. Just the mere thought made him flush and unable to answer for a few seconds, which had Soobin calling out for him again.

“Hyung? Is that a bad idea?”

“I-uh,” Yeonjun shook his head. Gather yourself, he told himself. “Yeah. Or no! No, it could be a good idea. I, uh, I can see if they have any, if you’d like?”

Soobin hummed in response, and so Yeonjun moved back into the shop. He looked around for a moment but decided to ask for help to not keep Soobin waiting for too long.

It took her no time to show him where the tights were, and less than a minute later Yeonjun was back. He handed Soobin the tights by shoving them underneath the door, to which Soobin let out a quick “thanks” before he went ahead to change.

Yeonjun waited in anticipation for a minute or two. He knew what to expect, and that was a Soobin that looked outrageously good.

And he was not disappointed.

The shirt fit him perfectly, just tight enough to show off his muscles. He had tucked it in, and pulled the skirt as low as he could. Still, the skirt stopped around midthigh, leaving little of Soobin’s legs left for imagination.

“Soobin.” Yeonjun felt his cheeks heat up against his will at the sight of his best friend before him. He shamelessly ran his eyes up and down Soobin’s frame, his gaze unwillingly lingering on Soobin’s long, slim legs.

Soobin shyly stepped out of the booth entirely and leaned against its door. “I feel kinda stupid,” he said, biting his lip and looking sideways as if he couldn’t meet Yeonjun’s eyes.

“Shut up,” Yeonjun said not unkindly, standing up. Soobin’s eyes flickered over to him immediately. Something insecure brewed in those eyes, and Yeonjun recognized it as the type of looking meaning Soobin was in need of some talking up from his side. “You’re the most handsome guy in the room on a normal day, if anyone sees you wearing this they’re gonna faint from your smoky hotness.”

The expression on Soobin’s face flickered between amusement, gratefulness and embarrassment. “You shut up,” he muttered as Yeonjun stepped closer and thumbed absentmindedly at the bottom of Soobin’s skirt. Yeonjun laughed at the way he was clearly holding back a smile.

“Why don’t you let me style you more often?” Yeonjun found himself asking, eyes once again scanning Soobin up and down from this close. “Jeans and t-shirts have got nothing on this.”

The comment pulled a genuine laugh out of Soobin, a sound that warmed Yeonjun’s heart.

“I don’t think I’ve ever worn anything this revealing before,” Soobin admitted, and Yeonjun agreed. This outfit was designed to be revealing, provoking, and not at all like Soobin’s normal setup that he was famous for. But sometimes, change was good.

He looks so freakishly hot, he was thinking. So hot, so sexy, I want to have a bite of him.

He managed to give Soobin a hum, which seemed to satisfy him enough.

“I love it,” Yeonjun said, and he unconsciously pushed on Soobin’s hips so he would turn around a little. This gave Yeonjun a perfect view of Soobin’s butt, and he couldn’t stop himself from giving his friend a light slap on the left cheek. Over the skirt, of course. “Makes your butt look great too.”

Soobin laughed, less uncomfortable now that Yeonjun was in a playful mood. “Stop,” he said, although he was grinning from ear to ear. Yeonjun loved the small blush on the apples of his cheek.

“What? You know you’ve got a great butt, Bin-ah!” Yeonjun nudged him teasingly. “It’s about time you show it off. The ladies are gonna love you tomorrow.”

Yeonjun stepped back to go sit down again, assuming Soobin was going to change back to his own clothes. Soobin didn’t, though, so when Yeonjun sat he watched a frown spread on Soobin’s face.

“Ladies?” the younger asked, watching Yeonjun with intensity in his eyes.

“Yeah? You know, just because it’s a queer party doesn’t mean there won’t be any chance for you straights to get some action. There’ll probably be lots of bi people there, too,” Yeonjun explained with a shrug.

Soobin kept on frowning at him, and Yeonjun’s smile faltered. He wanted to ask what got Soobin looking like that, if something he said had offended him somehow, but before he could Soobin let out of huff and went back to the dressing booth.

“Are you satisfied with the outfit then?” Yeonjun asked, hoping that changing the subject would bring back the cheery mood between them.

“Yes,” Soobin answered curtly, and Yeonjun didn’t have it in him to say anything more after that.

As Soobin paid, Yeonjun called Taehyun and Kai to get an update on how their search was going. Apparently, they had bought matching dress pants that they sent pictures of to Yeonjun. Once he saw how it looked with their shirts, he approved.

Soobin joined his side as he told the younger two that they were going to head home. He ended the call jovially, but immediately when he turned to look up at his friend, he could feel Soobin’s sour mood affecting him again.

“Bin-ah,” he said, locking his arm with his taller friend. They walked out of the shop, and Yeonjun eyed the stand they had passed on their way in. “Want to have some ice cream before we head home? I’ll treat you.”

“I don’t know,” Soobin said with a shrug, and Yeonjun recognized this undecisive-Soobin-mode. Sometimes when he got mad, but not angry enough to voice why he was mad, he would huff and act like a kid who didn’t want to do anything, no matter what Yeonjun suggested. Knowing this, Yeonjun also knew how to act in this scenario.

“Yeah? I think you want some. Let’s check it out.” He didn’t let Soobin say anything, pulling him with him towards the ice cream stand.

“Hyung-” Soobin complained, but he quieted when Yeonjun gave him a very pouty, puppy-eyes look.

“Soooobin,” Yeonjun whined, “let’s just get some ice cream. It’ll cheer you up, won’t it?”

As if surprised by Yeonjun calling his sour mood out, Soobin’s frown disappeared. Instead, he watched Yeonjun’s face as he kept blinking his eyes, pouting, and pulling gently on his arm, which he continued for long enough until Soobin couldn’t help but laugh at him.

“What made you go all gloomy before?” Yeonjun asked once they’d bought their ice cream and was walking around aimlessly in the mall. Soobin seemed to have cheered up, but Yeonjun couldn’t help asking about it. “Was it something I said?”

Soobin took a big scope of ice cream to avoid having to answer for a moment. Yeonjun was persistent, though, which Soobin knew, and waited patiently for him to speak.

“It wasn’t…” Soobin began, then shrugged. “It wasn’t that serious.”

“Bin-ah,” Yeonjun nudged him with his elbow, “if I said something that upset you, I want to know.”

“You didn’t ‘upset’ me, Hyung.” Soobin turned sideways to look at him. “It’s just… the thing you said about girls before. It made it sound like I’m just going to the party with you to hook up with strangers.”

Yeonjun felt genuine surprise, not having thought in those directions when he’d said those words before. “Oh, that’s really not what I meant. I’m sorry. I just… wanted to make you feel good, I suppose.” Absentmindedly, he grabbed at Soobin’s free hand, in search for closeness to ensure he’d be forgiven.

“I know, Hyung,” Soobin said, and he smiled down at their linked hands. “I just took it the wrong way. Sorry for ruining the mood.”

Part of Yeonjun wanted to push harder, to see if there was a reason why Soobin was so easily riled up today when he normally was the calmest in their friend group. But he didn’t want to go down that road when Soobin had just gotten his good mood back. Maybe it all boiled down to nerves about going to the club tomorrow, since Yeonjun knew Soobin wasn’t the biggest fan of big crowds.

After they finished their ice cream, they left for Yeonjun’s apartment, where they met their younger friends standing outside chatting.

“You took your time,” Taehyun snarkily commented when they approached. Yeonjun shortly explained they’d stopped for ice cream when they made their way up to his place.

“Come on, I wanna see Soobin-Hyung’s outfit!” Kai exclaimed when they had settled down inside. Yeonjun heard Soobin disagreeing, apparently wanting it to be a surprise, while he himself went to the kitchen to cook up something simple for them.

Humming as he cooked, Yeonjun wasn’t listening much to the conversation in the other room. He was in the zone, as always when he was cooking. But still, he managed to snap up some parts of their conversation, since they were just a few meters away.

“Do you think something will happen at the party?” Soobin’s voice spoke clearly, piquing Yeonjun’s attention.

“Like what? We’re going there to dance and drink, aren’t we?” Taehyun answered, his confused tone mimicking Yeonjun’s reaction to the question.

“No, that’s not what I meant… I mean… there’s gonna be a lot of people and…”

“Hyung, what is it?” Kai asked.

“I’m just… do you think Yeonjun-hyung is going there to—”

Yeonjun froze completely at the mention of his name, only to realize that Soobin had lowered his voice at the rest of the sentence. He huffed in frustration before jumping back into action, pondering on what just happened as he washed the vegetables for the dish.

Did Soobin deliberately lower his voice so that Yeonjun wouldn’t hear? And what was it that Soobin was worried he was going to do at the party?

The curiosity was killing him. He had half a mind to walk in there right that moment to try and hear the end of the conversation just to see what—

A cloud of steam rose from the pot in front of him, grabbing his attention and momentarily making him forget about the gossip he was missing out on. He quickly removed the pot from the stove and stirred quickly so the bottom wouldn’t burn.

He was muttering to himself, grumbling over distracting conversations and his annoying stove that took an eternity to cool down.

Maybe he could ask Taehyun what Soobin had asked about later. It was about him, after all. Surely, Taehyun would—

“How’s it going out here?”

Yeonjun jerked painfully at the sudden appearance of one tall alpha in the kitchen with him, throwing the thing in his hand across the room in response. Unfortunately, the thing in his hand had been the spoon he’d used to stir the soup, and it banged loudly on the floor where it landed, not to mention leaving a line of soup along on the wall.

Soobin instantly cracked up, laughing heartily and barely being able to hold himself upright.

“You scared me!” Yeonjun whined, grabbing a towel and smacking Soobin’s arm with it in retaliation.  

“Sorry,” Soobin managed to push out before he started laughing again when he saw the look on Yeonjun’s face.

“Stop laughing, loser,” Yeonjun complained, “this mess is your fault, now help me clean it up.”

“My fault?” Soobin raised his eyebrows as if about to argue. At the same time as he did so, he picked up the nearest towel and crouched on the floor to start wiping. “It’s all your fault, for being such a scaredy cat, Hyung.”

“But you know I’m a scaredy cat,” Yeonjun bickered while bending down to help Soobin, “and still you scare me when I’m holding dirty stuff.”

Yeonjun realized his own blunder the moment it came out of his mouth.

“This is definitely not the dirtiest thing I’ve caught you holding.” Soobin smirked. “You didn’t throw that one all across the room when you got scared that time.”

Yeonjun felt himself flush with hot embarrassment. “Oh my god, stop,” he cried, pushing Soobin until he tilted backwards and landed on his ass. The action only made Soobin laugh even harder, and Yeonjun opted to ignore him and wipe the rest of the soup on his own.

When the floor was wiped, he got to his feet to get the last remnants of soup on the walls. A grinning Soobin followed his example and moved to once again lean against the counter as he watched Yeonjun moving around.

Only when Yeonjun had disposed of the towel and gone back to tending to the dish he was making did he look at Soobin again. Thankfully, the smirk was wiped off his face, and he was watching Yeonjun with a fonder expression now.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Soobin said, as if he just remembered that the reason he came to the kitchen wasn’t to solely disturb Yeonjun’s peace. His expression morphed into something less confident, and it made Yeonjun stop moving to pay better attention to him. “Do you wanna go to the party together tomorrow? And, like, we could get ready together before?”

Yeonjun raised his eyebrows. “Oh, I kind of assumed we would get ready together,” he said with a laugh. He splattered some water from his fingers – wet from having just washed the vegetables – onto Soobin’s face playfully, laughing at the look on his face. “But yeah, let’s do that. You can come here, just leave your clothes here when you go home.”

“Great!” Soobin looked relieved; for what reason, Yeonjun had no idea. Maybe it had been too long since they went drinking together, and Soobin worried Yeonjun’s drinking habits had changed? Well, even if they had, Yeonjun was always going to choose Soobin over any other option presented to him.

Not that he was going to say those words to Soobin. He didn’t need his ego to grow any larger right now.

When the food was ready, he got Soobin to help him bring the plates and food out into the other room, where Kai and Taehyun had turned on the TV and were flickering between channels. Quickly, they settled into their usual routine, eating Yeonjun’s food, flickering between mocking and praising it and continuously being close to slopping onto either his carpet, his couch or themselves. When the food was eaten, they turned on Yeonjun’s old PS3 and started playing the first game they could agree on.

Before any of them knew it, it was late and time for them all to go home. Taehyun promised to drive the other two, and as usual he was the quickest to get ready to leave, which had him standing by the door tapping his foot in waiting.

Yeonjun followed them to the door, prepared to wave them goodbye and just close the door behind them, so he was surprised when Soobin lingered behind for a moment. He raised his eyebrows, waiting for Soobin to say something.

“I just- should we meet up after school tomorrow?”

Yeonjun gave him a weird, yet amused look. What was up with him? Since when did he have to ask the obvious questions? They always met up after school, even when they didn’t have plans together.

“Yes, of course,” Yeonjun simply answered. “You finish at 3, so I’ll wait for you. Sound good?”

Soobin’s face lit up. “Yeah, okay. Good. See you tomorrow, then.”

Yeonjun nearly laughed when Soobin hugged him, his nose tickling against Yeonjun’s neck. It wasn’t common for Soobin to initiate touch between them; it also wasn’t common for them to share goodbye hugs when they saw each other like 90 percent of their free time. So, he stood where he was, still a bit confused, when Soobin stepped back with a smile on his lips, waving goodbye and running after the other two. The door closed, and Yeonjun absentmindedly locked it.

Shaking his head, he prepared to go to bed. Soobin was acting weird, he thought. But he couldn’t wrap his mind around why.

Hopefully, he was just overthinking things. As he knew, doing so never did him any good. So, when he went to bed that night, he decided everything between him and Soobin was good, and that was that.

-

Friday came, and Yeonjun was feeling the anticipation and excitement for the evening growing with every passing hour. He kept sending excited text messages in their group chat, trying to make them as hype for the evening as he was.

His own last class ended at two, but he waited patiently in the hallway for an hour until it was time to meet up with Soobin. Since they didn’t study the same program, he had to make his way over to Soobin’s building.

He walked with spring in his legs, daydreaming about his outfit for the night and how fun it would be to get on the dancefloor, when the sound of his best friend’s name stood out and made him slow down.

“—finally gonna talk to Choi Soobin tonight?”

It was a group of three girls walking a few steps in front of him. The one talking was the tallest of the three, with long black hair coming out of a pink beret.

“Tonight?” the girl walking in the middle asked. She had shoulder length, dyed brown hair, and was clad in a pretty outfit made up of an oversized sweater and a pink skirt.

“Yes, tonight,” her tall friend answered. “I asked him during class earlier if he was going, and he said he was. It’s the perfect time!”

“I don’t know… will he even like me? I’ve never even talked to him.”

The third girl, walking to the left, spoke to the first time then. “You’ve been in the same class so he definitely knows who you are. And you’ve been crushing on him since last semester, you should at least give it a try!”

Since last semester, Yeonjun thought, nearly laughing in exasperation. Well, I’ve liked Soobin for years, beat that, bitch.

But then it hit him. She might win because Soobin was straight and might actually like her. Especially since…

“You’re an omega, he’s an alpha, it’s perfect!” It was the tall girl talking again. Yeonjun wanted to grab her wrist and tell her to her face that there was no rule saying that alphas had to be with omegas to be happy, but of course he didn’t do that. He had some self-restraint, at least.

“Yeah, but I don’t just like him because he’s an alpha,” middle girl, the main character of this conversation, said. “I’ve never met an alpha like him, he’s so much sweeter and kinder than all of them.”

Yes, Yeonjun thought. He’s the sweetest person there is.

“It’s worth giving it a shot, then, isn’t it?” the friend continued.

“Yeah, maybe.”

“If nothing else, you could get a good hookup,” her other friend added, which caused the three of them to burst into giggles.

Yeonjun felt like he was going to burst out something mean and decided it was better for him to just speed up and pretend like he hadn’t just been eavesdropping on their conversation. He powerwalked the rest of the way, causing him to arrive outside Soobin’s classroom five minutes before he knew the class would end.

Still in a sour mood from the conversation he overheard, Yeonjun took out his phone and leaned against the wall outside the classroom. He ended up scrolling down Soobin’s Instagram, staring at his best friend’s beautiful face to try and get his mood up.

It wasn’t working. All he could think about was that girl and what would happen if she was to talk to Soobin tonight. Would Soobin like her? He hadn’t seen her face but judging by what he’d seen of her from behind, he had a feeling they would look good together.

Would Soobin be interested in her? Maybe he wouldn’t. For as long as Yeonjun had known him (which, in fact, was all of Soobin’s life), Soobin had never dated anyone. He barely ever spoke about his crushes unless someone pulled it out of him. Yeonjun was aware asexual and aromantic people existed, but Soobin had never brought up any confusion regarding his sexuality.

Still, Yeonjun hated the unknown. He hated that he would just have to wait and see what would happen tonight. The mere thought of Soobin flirting with that girl – or worse, kissing – made him feel nauseous.  

On his screen, he found a picture Soobin had uploaded a few months ago, just at the start of summer. It was of the two of them, standing out in the sunlight. Soobin was grinning with his cute dimples, and Yeonjun remembered how he had been admiring Soobin just moments before he realized a picture would be snapped. Therefore, he only had time to wipe his face of his emotion, and so he wasn’t smiling in the picture. He looked like he was posing to look cool, which Soobin had teased him about.

They looked good together too. At least in his eyes.

Yeonjun locked his phone and shoved it into his pocket, huffing at himself in annoyance. Why was he even thinking about this? He was just making himself upset for no reason. He needed to cheer up before Soobin arrived, or he was going to notice something was wrong.

Easier said than done.

Or perhaps not.

Barely a minute later, people started pouring out of the classroom. Most of them were people Yeonjun recognized as Soobin’s classmates. One of the last few that exited was Soobin, walking together with two of his friends, Changmin, and Arin.

Yeonjun felt his annoyance run off him as soon as Soobin’s eyes found him, his face lighting up in a grin. The boy was so cute, Yeonjun suddenly couldn’t remember why he had been in a bad mood in the first place.

He watched Soobin say goodbye to his friends, waving to them himself as they left, and then Soobin was by his side.

“Hey, Hyung,” Soobin said, still grinning. “How was your day?”

Yeonjun mirrored Soobin’s excitement, grinning as he latched onto his friend’s arm. “It was good, and yours? What’s got you in such a good mood?”

They started walking, moving towards the exit of the building. Soobin shrugged, looking down at Yeonjun as he answered, “We didn’t get any new assignments today, and I think I’m excited for tonight.”

“You think?”

“Yeah, I hope it will be fun. You won’t disappear on me, right? You will stay by my side?”

Yeonjun gave him a funny look. “Why would I disappear on you?”

Shrugging again, Soobin looked in front of him as they reached the exit, pushing the door open as he answered, “I mean, you know, in case you meet someone or if you get too drunk, I don’t know…”

In case I meet someone…? Yeonjun nearly laughed at the thought. As if anyone other than Soobin would catch his eye.

“You don’t need to worry about that. Or, I mean, I can’t promise I won’t get drunk, but I don’t plan on disappearing on you.”

Soobin seemed at least a bit reassured by those words. They chatted about their day and whatever else on the way back to Yeonjun’s place, and Yeonjun didn’t let go of Soobin’s arm until they reached the stairwell in his house.

Once inside his apartment, Soobin immediately dropped his backpack by the door and went to stretch out on Yeonjun’s sofa. As always, it warmed Yeonjun’s heart to see how Soobin behaved like Yeonjun’s place was his own. It was just how he liked it; it made it feel like Soobin was also a part of his home, sometimes.

Figuring they didn’t need to get ready right away, they turned on the tv. Yeonjun moved towards his kitchen, telling Soobin he’d prepare some food for them. He also protested when Soobin offered to help, telling him to just relax.

A while later, the food was finished and Yeonjun brought out two ramen-filled bowls to where Soobin was now sitting on the couch, frowning down at his phone.

“Hey, whatcha frowning at?” Yeonjun asked lightly as he sat down next to the younger, placing the bowls in front of them on the table.

Soobin didn’t seem to have noticed him coming, as he jumped a little at his question. “Oh, um, just a text from my dad.”

Ah. “What was it this time?”

Soobin put his phone on the table, screen facing the table, and let out a huff of air. “Same old. Just asking me if I’ve found someone to mate yet.”

Yeonjun pressed his lips together and nodded thoughtfully. As soon as Soobin had turned twenty, his dad had started pressing him about mating. He was very stereotypical and wanted his son to follow in his footsteps, which meant finding an omega to mate and start producing children. Or pups, as he had heard the man call it. Which… was kinda weird, but Yeonjun guessed that he shouldn’t judge since they were a different species. Still sounded weird, though.

Yeonjun had been present a couple of times when Soobin’s dad had pressed him about it, and it always made Yeonjun feel awful. Every time he would watch Soobin’s face, seeing the discomfort appear when the conversation would tip in the direction of mates. He would get quiet and avoid Yeonjun’s eyes, as if he was ashamed of his dad’s constant questioning.

Sometimes he would argue back, other times he would just listen to his dad’s complaints and then try to change the conversation topic.

“As if he doesn’t already know the answer…” Soobin muttered, his tone taking a bitter note. “It’s been, what, a month since he last asked? Do you know what he answered when I told him I’m not looking?”

“What?” Yeonjun asked, leaning forward in his seat.

“He said I’m irresponsible for making no effort to find a mate. That an alpha my age should already be mated and getting ready to start a family.” Soobin let out a humorless laugh. “He even said he could introduce me to a few ‘presentable’ omegas.”

“Oh my god.” Yeonjun was dumbfounded. He didn’t know what to say to that.

“Yeah. He’s starting to piss me off. I’m 22, for fucks sake, my biological clock isn’t even close to running out. Why is he in such a rush? If I’m gonna mate someone, I would want it to be someone I chose, you know?”

Yeonjun nodded mutely, trying not to let the thought of Soobin finding a mate sting. “Do you want to find a mate?” he asked, hoping his voice was not sounding as small as he felt.

“Huh?” Soobin seemed surprised by the question, as his annoyed expression slipped away.

"Do you want to mate someone, eventually?"

“I… I don’t know.” He glanced at Yeonjun before looking down at his hands, thoughtfully. “I think so. But if I don’t, I don’t think I would miss anything, because I don’t really know how it feels to be mated to someone.”

“I read it’s the greatest connection you can have to another person,” Yeonjun mumbled, watching Soobin’s hands as he fiddled with his fingers on the table. “Like, once you’re mated, you feel more than just love, you feel like a part of each other.”

“Why did you look that up?”

They looked at each other then, and Yeonjun wished he could read the look in Soobin’s eyes. He tried his best to explain what his reasoning for reading about it had been. “I was curious, you know? Two of my best friends are alphas, so I wanted to know more about your experiences.”

And because he liked to torment himself, apparently, and remind himself how ill-matched he and Soobin really were.

“I see.”

None of them seemed to know what to say after that. Yeonjun bit his lip, deciding to change the subject by pointing out that the food was starting to get cold.

They ate in silence for a while, both seemingly deep in thought. Yeonjun tried to wrap his mind about what Soobin’s dad was thinking, but it was hard. He supposed that Soobin’s dad had an old-fashioned mindset, but he still couldn’t imagine pressing his kid to do something that he evidently wasn’t ready for.

Yeonjun’s parents were nothing like that. They never tried to take control over Yeonjun’s life or his decisions. If anything, they were too lenient, letting him do whatever he wanted without any supervision. And they were distant in ways Soobin’s parents were not. Their way of showing love was sending Yeonjun gifts and heartful messages while they were off working in different places around the world. At least Yeonjun had Soobin and Taehyun around, or he’d have been very lonely growing up.

In that sense, Soobin’s parents were warmer. They gave Soobin and his older siblings all their time and energy, and their home was always full of love and happiness. Yeonjun had partly grown up in that house, and Soobin’s parents had always treated him like part of the family.

“I’ll ask mom to tell dad to stop asking me about getting a mate,” Soobin said when they were halfway through their bowls. A tiny frown line had formed between his brows, and Yeonjun’s first thought was how he wanted to rub it away with his fingers.

“Will that help?”

“Probably not.” Soobin groaned and took another mouthful of noodles, chewing and swallowing half of it before continuing to speak. “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

Yeonjun nodded at that. “Let’s watch something, I think we can chill for like half an hour before we need to get ready.”

“Hyung, it’s like 4 hours left,” Soobin said after swallowing, chopsticks already halfway to his mouth again as he was eager to finish before the noodles turned cold.

“So? I need to shower, dress myself, fix my hair and makeup—and then there’s this disaster,” he motioned up and down Soobin’s body, “that I need to do something about.”

Yeonjun revelled in the way Soobin looked mock offended, biting right back. “Disaster huh? You won’t say that when you see me dancing in that skirt tonight.”

If you only knew.

“That will be after I’ve done my job, Bin-ah. Bad argument.”

Yeonjun laughed as Soobin tried to come up with a comeback. After that, the air was lighter, and both of them could ignore any further thoughts about mating and Soobin’s dad.

Once they started getting ready, Soobin was complaining half of the time about how long time Yeonjun was taking. While Soobin showered for approximately 5 minutes, Yeonjun took 20. As Soobin dried his hair and put product in it, Yeonjun was occupied with his makeup kit and trying to figure out what colours worked best with the outfit he had decided upon.

Said outfit was made up of a (very) tight, electric blue, sleeveless shirt topped with a black corset and shiny black leather pants. His arms would be filled with accessories, so would his ears and neck, and he had painted his nails dark blue last night to go with it.

Glancing sideways as he pulled out his outfit and placed it on the bed, he noticed Soobin standing close to his body mirror, placing what looked like a translucent bandaid over the side of his neck. 

"Scent blocker?" he asked, recognizing the material since Soobin used them once in a while. 

"Yeah," Soobin replied, tilting his head this way and that to ensure the material was not going to come loose. "Just a precaution, you know?"

Yeonjun couldn't say that he did know, but he nodded all the same. "Sure." He kept his eyes as Soobin continued, removing another similar patch of scent blocker from its package and placing it against the other side of his neck.

They eyes met after Yeonjun had been staring at Soobin for a bit too long, causing him to jerk back into action and going back to what he was doing.

After the scent blockers, Soobin seemed ready to get dressed, and Yeonjun promptly kept his eyes off him the entire time. 

“If you’re not gonna get dressed for a while, I’m gonna get something to drink,” Soobin said when he was done, having watched Yeonjun stand there in his shorts and hoodie that he'd put on after his shower, picking up different hair styling products, stare at them intensely for a while, then shake his head and pick up another.

Turning his head, Yeonjun saw Soobin in his full glory, dressed in his outfit for the night. He looked as perfect as he did yesterday, and Yeonjun felt a rush of heat run through him as his eyes fell on his barely covered legs.

“God, you look so hot,” Yeonjun blurted out. He couldn’t even make himself feel embarrassed about it after it happened, because he was so gay for Soobin.

Soobin froze and stared right at him where Yeonjun sat on the floor close to his bed. Yeonjun waited in anticipation, unsure what Soobin’s reaction would be.

He did not expect Soobin to let out a low snort and shake his head. Is he dismissing my praise?

“Soobin, I mean it. You should show off your figure more often, you look really hot.”

Yeonjun was an affectionate friend, he often showered his friends in compliments, but perhaps this one came out sounding much more sincere than normal. Perhaps that was why Soobin suddenly became a stuttering mess, his entire face slowly turning a bright red color.

“Thank you, Hyung, I’m… I mean, you look good too, even if you haven’t dressed yet, not that you need to be dressed to look good – or, no, that’s not what I mean! I, uh… I’m gonna get something to drink.”

Yeonjun held in his laughter until Soobin was out of sight – he bolted out of the room, avoiding Yeonjun’s eyes – and then he giggled to himself at Soobin’s cuteness. Wow, he knew Soobin was bad at taking compliments, but still. So cute.

Having decided on a palette, Yeonjun went to start on his makeup, humming under his breath as he worked.

Half an hour later, he was staring at himself in the mirror of his bathroom with a grin on his face. He had to say, he was pretty satisfied with the result. The smokey, dark blue-to black eyeshadow he had put on made his entire look more mysterious than previously, and the way he had outlined his lips made them much fuller and noticeable. More kissable, he would like to think.

Not that he expected Soobin to kiss him tonight, but a guy could dream.

He quickly pulled on his outfit, deciding to take a break before fixing his hair and adding the accessories. It dawned on him that Soobin had been in the kitchen the whole time he was doing his makeup, and he was curious what he was doing out there.

“Bin-ah,” he called as he made his way into the kitchen, where he found Soobin on the phone. His friend barely glanced at him as he entered, so Yeonjun walked closer, until he was by Soobin’s side. “Who is it?”

“It’s Tae, he—” Soobin’s eyes widened a little when his eyes fell on Yeonjun’s face.

A part of Yeonjun was very proud of his work, because it wasn’t often he managed to render Soobin speechless like this. He smirked, then leaned back and walked around Soobin to reach the fridge. On his way, he smacked Soobin’s butt like he always did, chuckling at the little yelp his friend let out in response.

He grabbed a beer from the fridge before making his way back to Soobin’s other side now, the one where his phone was still held against his ear.

“Hey Tae, I think Soobin’s broken,” he mused close to the phone, chuckling as his words managed to get Soobin to move.

“No, I’m not,” Soobin blurted, shooting Yeonjun a flabbergasted look. “I was just surprised.”

“Surprised by how good your Hyung looks?”

Soobin sighed and rubbed his face with one hand. Then, he held out the phone to him. “Tae needs your help with something, outfit related.”

Still laughing, Yeonjun took the phone from him. “Heyo, Taehyun-ah,” he answered cheerfully.

“Hello. Are you having fun teasing Soobin-Hyung?”

Yeonjun watched Soobin grab what had to be at least his second beer from the fridge, smirking. “Very much. How’s it going for you, did you have a problem you needed help with?”

Taehyun proceeded to explain his emergency being that the shirt he had bought yesterday had shrunk in the wash, and now he couldn’t find a shirt that went well with the rest of his outfit. Finding the entire thing hilarious, Yeonjun laughed but still tried to give useful advice. He asked Taehyun how much the shirt had shrunk, in case there was anything to salvage. Apparently, it had gone from being long sleeved and reaching well below his stomach to not even reaching his navel and elbows. “But does it still fit?” Yeonjun had asked, and after complaining about it being tight Taehyun had grumbled that it did. So, Yeonjun made him send a picture of his outfit with the shirt on. He found, then, that the disaster of the shrinking shirt had made it into a crop top that no one would question had ever been anything but a crop top.

“My suggestion? Just go with that top,” Yeonjun said after studying the picture for a while. “It removes the whole having to replan your entire outfit, and it is definitely a Look.”

After a bit more complaints from Taehyun’s side, the younger boy finally agreed to going with that shirt. But, as he said, he would not be happy about it.

“Problem solved?” Soobin asked after Yeonjun ended the call and handed him his phone back. Soobin had gone back and forth between the bathroom and the kitchen as they talked, but with his enhanced hearing, Yeonjun was sure he must’ve heard most of the conversation anyways.

“Yup,” Yeonjun said with a chuckle. “I swear, Tae’s gonna have many eyes on him tonight.” Soobin raised his eyebrows, so he explained further by simply saying, “Crop top.”

“Oh,” Soobin said, nodding. “Well, Tae has abs, it’s about time he starts showing them off.”

Yeonjun snorted. “Damn right.” He let his eyes scan Soobin up and down. The alpha seemed more composed now, having recovered from Yeonjun’s teasing earlier. He kinda wanted to tease him again, maybe pull on his cheek and coo at his cuteness, but sadly there was no time for it.

“Can I do your face now?” he asked, suddenly excited to get to work his art on him. Soobin was not exactly against using makeup, he just couldn’t be bothered to put it on himself. Once in a while, he would let Yeonjun do his work on him, but he only ever allowed him to put foundation and blush on his face.

Tonight, though, Soobin had allowed Yeonjun free reigns, and he was gonna take full advantage of that.

“Sure,” Soobin answered, “go ahead.”

Once he had gotten verbal agreement, Yeonjun grabbed Soobin’s wrist and pulled him to the bathroom, where he sat him down gently on the toilet. The lighting in there was perfectly illuminating Soobin’s features, he thought as he stared down at Soobin thoughtfully.

“I can do whatever I want?” he asked, even though the younger had already agreed to this when he had asked the previous day.

“Yes,” Soobin said, a bit insecurely. “As long as you don’t make me look like a clown.”

Laughing, Yeonjun grabbed his brushes. “Have some faith in me, Bin-ah.”

Chapter Text

When the time came to leave for the party, the two besties were all dolled up and ready to move. He’d gone easy on the eye makeup on Soobin, settling on a light eyeliner and some red dusting over his lids to match his hair. He’d instead gone heavy on the blush and lip liner, accentuating Soobin’s pretty lip form with some colour.  

Unfortunately, when Taehyun’s dad – who had offered to drive them tonight – showed up with the younger two yapping in the backseat, Yeonjun was forced to take the front seat where he no longer had a great view of Soobin.

Maybe it was self-praise for his own skills, but damn. Seeing Soobin in his makeup sure was something extra.

“You guys look great,” Kai spoke, and Yeonjun turned around in his seat to meet his gaze. His eyes ran up and down his two youngest friends’, leading to a grin splitting his face open.

“So do you,” he beamed. “Tell me, Kai-ah, how much did Tae complain about his stomach being visible?”

Kai leaned forward in his seat, faking a whisper that he knew everyone in the car was hearing, “so much, hyung. As if he doesn’t know he’s got the figure of an athlete.” He leaned back, grinning as he mimicked Tae’s voice, “everyone’s gonna stare at my stomach, I don’t want people to see-“

Kai yelped as Taehyun hit him, hard, in the side. “I do not sound like that,” Taehyun muttered.

Yeonjun shared a look with Kai and Soobin before the three of them burst out into laughter.

Not long thereafter, they arrived at their destination. The music was loud enough to be heard from the outside. It was early still, only 9, but from what they could see it was pretty crowded already.

“Let’s goooo,” Yeonjun called as he strutted forward, expecting his friends to follow close behind. His grin spread even wider on his face the closer to the inside he got; when he showed his ID to the girl by the door, he was basically a beacon of excitement.

“Excited?” she asked, smiling at the way he could barely contain himself, practically jumping on the spot.

“Hell yeah,” he answered, looking back at his friends. Soobin was standing closely behind him, and when Yeonjun got his ID back he handed his to the girl. His face was more collected than Yeonjun’s, his emotions hidden in a way that made Yeonjun wonder if he was nervous.

“That’s the spirit,” the girl said to Yeonjun when she scanned her eyes over Soobin’s ID. As she handed it back, Yeonjun was quick to hook his arm in Soobin’s, ready to pull him inside. The girl’s smile widened. “Hope you have a great night.”

“Thanks! Guys, we’ll go find a table,” Yeonjun called out over his shoulder as he ran forward Soobin stumbling after him, barely catching the way Taehyun nodded in agreement.

Despite the crowd, they didn’t have trouble finding a free table, or, well, it was more of a booth perhaps. Yeonjun scooted in next to Soobin, sitting close despite the big space available.

“It seems like a pretty popular night,” Soobin commented as he looked around.

Yeonjun agreed. The dancefloor was already crowded, and there was a lot of people hanging around the bar area. He had been at this place before, since it was the most popular student bar around their campus, and he thought this was the most people he had seen there. It made him proud to think that this many people would show up to a night supporting Queer people.

“Oh, Tae says they’ll try to buy some drinks,” Soobin said, pulling Yeonjun’s attention to him. He was looking down at his phone, likely at a text from Taehyun. “What do you want?”

Yeonjun named a random drink he could think of, and Soobin sent their order to Taehyun. When Soobin put his phone down then, he found Yeonjun quite indiscreetly staring at him. He raised his eyebrows in question and waited for Yeonjun to look away, but when he didn’t Soobin narrowed his eyes at him.

“Hyung, why are you staring at me like that?”

Maybe Yeonjun was tipsy already, because he couldn’t fight the urge to tell Soobin exactly what he was thinking. “You just look so hot tonight.” He leaned closer, only to reach up with his hand to pinch Soobin’s cheek like a grandma. “Where’s my cute Soobin-ah gone?”

“Aish,” Soobin said as he pushed Yeonjun’s hand away, scowling when the older laughed at him. “I can be cute when I wanna be cute,” he said, slapping Yeonjun on the shoulder when he wouldn’t stop laughing. “But tonight is not a night to be cute.”

“You are totally right about that,” Yeonjun said with a grin and a wiggle of the eyebrows.

Minutes later, Taehyun and Kai came to the table bearing 4 tall glasses with straws. Yeonjun happily grabbed the pink one that was placed in front of him.

They spent the first twenty minutes there chattering and slowly sipping on their drinks. The atmosphere in the bar was very comfortable, with not too loud music and dimmed just enough to make it alluring.

At one point, Kai was retelling a story his sister had told him about their dog, and they were all laughing at the end of it. Hiding his grin behind his hand, Yeonjun looked between his friends as their faces split open in laughter. He already knew it, but in that moment his heart swelled with appreciation and love for the three of them.

“Hey, let’s go dance!” Yeonjun suggested a few minutes later when Soobin – always the slowest, whether it was walking or eating or drinking – finally swallowed the last of his drink.

They knew there was no point arguing, because Yeonjun would hit that dance floor no matter if they followed him or not.

They elbowed their way into the dance floor, and there made their own little circle where they could let it all loose and pretend like they were the only ones in there. The music was louder here than in the bar area, and together with the sound of people singing and dancing and even some screaming, it was overwhelming in the perfect way.

They danced, and Yeonjun felt great. He moved to the music in ways only he could. And the entire time, he kept his gaze on Soobin. Soobin who was looking so good, so hot and so sexy in the dim lighting around them. Soobin, whose eyes only flickered back to Yeonjun once in a while, and then quickly away again.

Eventually, Yeonjun started noticing the way people were backing away from him, giving him more space for his fantastic moves, and then he realized someone was cheering him on. Apparently, he had drawn attention to himself by his dance moves. Yeonjun didn’t complain, just continued doing his moves, until he was hit by the realization that his friends had backed away as well.

Taehyun was standing a few steps away, dancing in tiny on his own as if he was just there waiting for Yeonjun, keeping an eye on him. Kai and Soobin were gone.

“Where are the others?” He half-yelled to Taehyun after stepping closer, noticing in the back of his mind how the cheers dissipated, and the crowd slowly moved back to fill the hole that had been created for Yeonjun. Part of him wanted to keep going, but there was a bugging feeling inside of him that his friends had left him.

Well, at least Taehyun was still there.

“Kai needed to go to the toilet,” Taehyun yelled back, leaning in to speak right in his ear. Yeonjun had to bow down slightly to help him. “And you know Soobin hates attention, so he went with him.”

Ah, yes. Maybe as Soobin’s best friend, Yeonjun should have known Soobin wouldn’t stay for long in a crowd like this. Often, Soobin had enough energy to keep up with him, and he did enjoy dancing and singing, but when it became too much – especially when too many eyes started looking his way, as they had done when Yeonjun had gotten lost in the music just now­ – he would always retreat.

Yeonjun wished he had told him; he would have followed without a thought.

“Let’s go,” Taehyun suggested, and Yeonjun nodded and let himself be pulled through the crowd by his smaller friend.

They wound up back at a table – not the same one as before, because that one had been occupied by a group of giggling girls – staring out at the people at the dance floor.

“Hey there, cutie,” an unfamiliar voice spoke, catching Yeonjun’s attention. He turned towards the source, mildly interested, and saw a tall guy with blonde hair and purple eyeliner staring at Taehyun. “Would you mind if I offer you a drink?”

His tone was very obviously flirty, and the look in his eyes told Yeonjun just what this man had in mind for Taehyun. The guy was pretty attractive, however his sense of fashion screamed boring to Yeonjun. He was clad in a purple shirt – not the same purple as his eyeliner though – and leather pants. That was it. No layers, no accessories, nothing. Boring.

Yeonjun was too occupied insulting the guy’s outfit in his head to realize the way Taehyun looked utterly uncomfortable next to him. “I don’t really feel like drinking,” Taehyun answered curtly.

“That’s fine,” the guy responded, apparently not seeing Taehyun’s discomfort, “I’d be up for some dancing, too.”

At this point, Yeonjun felt the glare Taehyun was sending him, making him shift his gaze to look at his friend. His expression was set in a scowl that was meant to convey something to Yeonjun, he was sure, but it didn’t click until Taehyun used his eyes to indicate he wanted Yeonjun to help him get rid of the guy.

Oh, right. He had promised Taehyun to be his anti-wingman tonight. It had totally slipped his mind.

The moment he realized, Yeonjun shifted on his feet so that he was standing half a step in front of Taehyun, as if shielding him from view. He cleared his throat as his eyes fell on the blonde guy, a look of annoyance on his face.

“I’m sorry, can’t you see he’s not interested?”

The blonde looked taken aback. He probably hadn’t expected rejection, and especially not coming from Yeonjun’s mouth. “Excuse me?”

“Yes, please, excuse yourself and leave.” Yeonjun waved his hands in a shooing motion, indicating that he wanted him to go.

The blonde glared at him for several long seconds. Yeonjun kind of wondered what he was thinking, if he was considering to keep going or if he was planning his escape route.

In the end, the guy didn’t even say anything when he decided to turn on his heel and leave. He gave one last glance at Taehyun, though, but this time his eyes held nothing but resentment.

When the guy was gone, it was quiet for two seconds. Then Taehyun hit Yeonjun in the arm. Hard.

“Ow!” Yeonjun rubbed the spot, pouting at his friend. “Why’d you do that for?”

“You didn’t even remember what you promised me,” Taehyun accused, and he didn’t look regretful for hurting Yeonjun at all.

“I made him go away, didn’t I?”

“You were too slow!”

Yeonjun chuckled at the horrified look at Taehyun’s face. “How come you’re so afraid of being flirted with, anyways?”

At that, Taehyun’s anger faltered. “I’m not afraid. I just… don’t appreciate it when the only reason someone is interested in me is because of a momentary attraction.”

If he was Kai, Yeonjun would have laughed and teased Taehyun for the way he just admitted he wants someone to commit to him. But Yeonjun had a really soft spot for Taehyun – maybe because he was always trying to keep up a façade that he had no emotions to begin with – so he just smiled and patted the younger man’s hand that lay on the table before them. “I get it. People can be really superficial sometimes.”

Taehyun smiled back, looking a bit relieved by Yeonjun’s answer.

Like the guy had said before, Yeonjun thought, Taehyun was indeed cute, but not because of his appearance (in fact, that guy had been incredibly wrong to call him that tonight, seeing as Taehyun looked steaming hot, not cute). He was just so precious; a romantic at heart who might come across as cold or emotionless to an outside eye, but who truly cared about his friends and wasn’t afraid to talk about his emotions, even if he often did so in a quite robotic way.

“Why are you looking at me like you just fell in love?”

Yeonjun laughed loudly at that, shaking his head fondly as Taehyun chuckled at his own joke next to him. “Let’s go find the two delinquents,” he suggested, pulling out his phone as they made their way away from the table.

He wrote a quick message in their group chat:

The old one

Hey, where are you guys

Baby maknae

Second floor

Changmin told us there were games up here

The old one

What kind of games?

We’re coming

Baby maknae

[image_png]

Yeonjun chuckled at the picture Kai sent of Soobin posing aggressively over an air-hockey table. The look on his face was very competitive and focused, and he was looking very hot in the dim lighting. Yeonjun could just imagine how much of his thighs would be visible underneath his skirt when he bent over like that.

He showed Taehyun the conversation, and the two immediately made their way to join their two nerdy friends.

As soon as they made it to the second floor, they heard the banter of two familiar voices from the other side of the room.

“Hey! That was a lucky shot!”

“Believe what you want, hyung! You just can’t accept that I’m slaughtering you here.”

“6-3 is not slaughtering; I’ll catch up before you know it-“

Needless to say, they had no problem finding them.

-

Much to Yeonjun’s satisfaction, there was a bar on the second floor as well, so while Kai and Soobin’s aggressive first match took place, he ordered drinks for all of them.

He truly enjoyed watching his friends play while standing by the side, sipping on his sour drink. Soobin and Kai were both as competitive as one could be, which made their matches incredibly loud and loaded. Taehyun, on the other hand, was anything but competitive. But he was also incredibly good at playing, and the combination led to him winning every single game and either Kai or Soobin sulking afterwards.

After five rounds of games between the other three, Yeonjun wasn’t allowed to just stand by and look pretty. He was pushed into a game against Soobin, because apparently Soobin had lost every game, and he couldn’t stand not winning against someone. As if Yeonjun would let him win that easily.

“Get that smug look off your face, Bin-ah,” he called as he leaned over the table, ready to smash the puck towards Soobin’s side.

“Ready to lose, Hyung?”

It was the most intense game yet, because Yeonjun suddenly became really invested in not letting Soobin win. He couldn’t decide if it was because of pettiness or because he didn’t want to look like a loser to Soobin. Probably both. It was very much possible to be Soobin’s best friend and to be crushing on him at the same time.

After ten minutes they were tied 7-7, and Yeonjun’s focus was waning as he was starting to feel the alcohol he’d consumed. He felt fuzzy. He wanted to put an end to it, but he also wouldn’t let Soobin win that easily.

With an idea in mind, he called for a break and walked over to where he’d put his glass on Soobin’s side. Soobin was looking even more smug than before, thinking Yeonjun was worried to lose.

Yeonjun grabbed his glass and stepped into Soobin’s personal space. He gave him the most innocent, cute face he could pull off, leaning his head on Soobin’s shoulder. “I don’t wanna play anymore, Soobinnie. Can’t we end on a tie?”

He swore he heard Soobin swallow thickly and giggled at the thought of Soobin being affected by him acting cute. “Hyung—”

“Please?” He lifted his head and batted his eyelashes at poor Soobin. “Neither of us have to lose.”

Somewhere behind them, Kai and Tae were chuckling and whispering, just like Yeonjun expected them to. He had grown to learn to ignore them easily, but he noticed that Soobin’s eyes flickered to them for a moment. To really sell in his pleading, Yeonjun pouted his lips and grabbed the hem of Soobin’s skirt – which, damn, he had forgotten Soobin was wearing that, oh damn how could he forget—

“Fine,” Soobin finally gave in, thankfully interrupting Yeonjun’s line of thought. He looked a bit flushed, especially judging by the way he avoided Yeonjun’s eyes. “Kai, uh—” he cleared his throat, “a rematch?”

Once again, Yeonjun found himself standing by the side, watching the game. Or, more like, watching Soobin’s legs as the skirt kept riding up whenever he made his shots. This time, Taehyun was next to him instead of cheering on the two players.

“You’re so obvious,” Tae said in a low voice without even looking at Yeonjun. The way he said it was blunt, but with an edge of fondness to it.

Drunk Yeonjun didn’t care to deny it. “I know. Sometimes I wonder how he can’t see it.”

His gaze wandered to upwards when Soobin let out a triumphant sound. He stared at the way Soobin’s face lit up, thinking that the way he was jumping on his feet was perhaps the cutest thing Yeonjun had seen all night. The sight made him sigh as he felt the longing for Soobin’s love grow inside of him.

Sometimes he wondered what would happen if Soobin was to find out. If he told him, or if Soobin figured it out by himself. He knew Soobin was kind and wouldn’t reject him in a mean way. But he didn’t know what it would do with their friendship, if it would change their closeness and make Soobin drift away from him. It wasn’t an irrational fear, because he had seen it happen to many people before. Unrequited feelings were hard to deal with, for both parts. He also didn’t know how he would react when being rejected. He’d much rather live without knowing what would happen.

Shaking those thoughts away, Yeonjun put down his now empty glass and decided to stay positive. Tonight was supposed to be a great night, so he was going to have fun.

“Does anyone wanna head back to the dancefloor?” he asked, first looking to Taehyun then the two who were still quite invested in their match.

Taehyun was up for it, nodding, but both Kai and Soobin grumbled that they just wanted to finish the game first (“I need to crush Kai’s ass this one time”, “I just need to hand hyung’s ass back to him.”), so it ended with them splitting up once again. Yeonjun didn’t mind much, as Soobin promised they would join them on the dancefloor as soon as they were done.

Perhaps an hour had passed since they were last on the dancefloor, and the mood had definitely changed. There was a sexier vibe to it all; the lighting, the music, the way people were dancing.

Yeonjun wasn’t complaining, but he could see Taehyun hesitate on the outskirts of the crowd. He raised an eyebrow in question, at which Taehyun seemed to stealth himself before pushing forward.  

At least once they started dancing it was easy to forget about all the sweaty people around them and create a bubble of their own. Yeonjun loved every second of it, the feeling of getting lost in the music and how it seemed like it was only him and Taehyun against the world.

Unfortunately, the illusion of their own little bubble didn’t last forever. Someone was pushing their way into their little two-person circle, and it wasn’t hard to figure out what their intention was. Yeonjun was a little too drunk to care much at first, focusing on his movements and expecting that person to keep a respectable distance.

It became clear very quickly that the stranger, who was another guy very similar in build to Taehyun, had no thoughts of staying respectable. He moved closer and tried to catch Taehyun’s attention, which he very clearly rejected by sidestepping. The stranger wasn’t deterred and stepped right back into Taehyun’s space.

Yeonjun was about to pull Taehyun away discretely, but any ounce of kindness left in him disappeared the moment the dude put his hand on Taehyun.

A hand had swiped through the air and was placed on the side of Taehyun’s neck with clear intention. The touch had Taehyun jerking almost as if in pain, and even as Yeonjun ripped the hand off his friend, Taehyun seemed to fold into himself.

“The fuck is your problem,” the stranger cursed at Yeonjun, who wouldn’t release his tight grip around the offending wrist.

“My problem is you, and if you don’t leave right now, I’m going to get the guard to escort you out for violating my friend.”

The stranger glared at him but seemed to realise that Yeonjun was taller and angrier than he was prepared to deal with. “Chill, dude, I didn’t even do anything.”

Part of Yeonjun wanted to argue and make sure the guy got to hear exactly what it was that he did, but one look at Taehyun made him drop it in turn of making sure Taehyun was fine. His eyes looked glazed over and scared, and when Yeonjun remembered his reluctance to go here tonight, guilt bubbled up inside him.

He aggressively released the grip on the stranger’s hand and growled, “just get the fuck out of here,” and turned to gently guide Taehyun out of the crowd. He hoped he wouldn’t see that face preferably ever again.

Yeonjun manoeuvred them over to a bench near the entrance of the place, where some cool air breezed past them every time someone opened the doors. Taehyun sucked in a long breath to steady himself and Yeonjun nudged him in the side with an elbow.

“You alright?”

Taehyun nodded with his jaw clenched. “Just… he touched my scent gland,” he explained, a visible shiver running down his back at the mention. “Maybe he didn’t realize it, because he was human…”

“What?” Yeonjun’s frown deepened. His eyes searched Taehyun’s neck where he guessed the gland would be, remembering Soobin putting blockers over his own earlier that evening.  

While he didn’t understand it fully, he had heard his friends talk about their scent glands and how sensitive they were. Apparently touching another’s scent gland was a very jarring sensation if done without consent. Because of this knowledge, Yeonjun’s anger boiled back up again.

“That bitch,” he growled, standing up as if to go on a wolf hunt for the guy, only for Taehyun to grab his bicep before his ass was fully off the bench.

“Don’t,” Taehyun said. “He probably didn’t do it on purpose, and I’m fine anyways. Just needed a breather.”

Yeonjun searched Taehyun’s eyes to deduce whether he was lying. When he found no sign of dishonesty, he deflated and went to hug Taehyun from the side. “Fine,” he muttered. “I’m sorry.”

Taehyun hugged him back and gave a small giggle. “Why are you sorry?”

“I’m the worst anti-wingman ever. Couldn’t even keep a handsy stranger away for ten seconds.”

 He felt Taehyun shake his head. “You protected me well enough, I’d say,” Taehyun said in a fond voice.

Yeonjun wanted to protest, his slightly drunk brain telling him he was doing a terrible job at being a friend, but thankfully Taehyun knew him well enough to stop him before he could start.

“I’m fine and nothing bad happened, so no need to go on a tangent about how sorry you are, okay?” He leaned back and smiled at Yeonjun. “Shall we go look for Soobin-hyung and Kai now?”

“No need to go searching,” said a voice behind Yeonjun’s back that he recognized instantly. Turning, he saw Kai looking down at them with a big grin, eyeing the closeness between them. “What’s going on here, anyways?” he added, wiggling his eyebrows. “I thought you guys went dancing?”

Yeonjun let out a frustrated sigh and detached himself from Taehyun before standing. “There was a creepy dude, being creepy with Tae,” he explained with a grimace. The mere thought of him made him seethe, so he needed something else to focus on to not bring the mood down.

It didn’t take long until his attention caught on the fact that one person was missing right now. “Wait, where’s Soobin?”

Kai looked startled for a moment, as if he too had forgotten about Soobin’s absence. “Oh, right! He said he wanted to get some fresh air, something about the scents being overwhelming in here.”

“That doesn’t sound like a terrible idea,” Tae said, running a hand over his face. “The amount of pheromones in here is more headache inducing than the alcohol I’ve consumed.”

Oh. Yeonjun winced again. The fact that so many scents mixed into one could affect them in ways him and Kai weren’t noticing hadn’t even crossed his mind.

“Let’s go out and see if we can find him, then,” Kai suggested, looking as guilty as Yeonjun was feeling.

As they made their way towards the entrance, Yeonjun found himself much less steady on his feet than before. Begrudgingly, he grabbed onto Kai’s steady frame, using him to walk in more of a straight line in case any of the guards were watching him.

Just as they reached the exit, someone calling Yeonjun’s name caught their attention. They turned towards the big, open staircase a few steps away, and Yeonjun was surprised to see a slender, well-dressed, and very much familiar guy walking towards them.

“Wooyoungie? What’re you doing here?”

His face must have been one of shock, because Wooyoung burst out laughing as he enveloped Yeonjun in a hug.

Wooyoung was a friend from his hometown, which was nearly 4 hours away by train. Therefore, seeing him in Seoul on a Friday night – more so seeing him in the same club as him – was quite a surprise.

“I had the option to take my current classes online, so I’m here to visit Sannie for a few weeks,” Wooyoung explained happily.

Sannie, or San, being Wooyoung’s best friend who had moved to Seoul around the same time as Yeonjun had. Who also happened to be Wooyoung’s on and off casual fling, apparently, if Yeonjun had understood Wooyoung’s explanations over the phone correctly. Wooyoung’s situation was not unlike Yeonjun’s own with Soobin, however Wooyoung had taken a different route than him. He had confessed just before San was moving to the big city, and San had taken it like a champ and admitted he wasn’t ready for a relationship. Which led to them having this on and off, perhaps friends with benefits relationship that Yeonjun didn’t fully understand.

“Oh my god, really?” Yeonjun’s smile got even wider. “We have to hang out some time then!”

Yeonjun was about to dump a whole load of questions on his friend since they hadn’t seen each other for a while, when a cough reminded him of his two friends next to him.

“Oh, Wooyoung, this is Kai, and Taehyun you know, of course,” he, gesturing at his friends who just waved awkwardly back. Since Taehyun and Soobin grew up with Yeonjun, they knew Wooyoung by association from their hometown.

Wooyoung grinned at them before returning his gaze to Yeonjun. “So, did you leave your other half at home for tonight?”

Yeonjun’s face burst with heat, instantly knowing who Wooyoung was talking about. He sputtered and his furious blush didn’t get any better after his friends realised what Wooyoung was talking about.

“Other half?” Kai wondered while Taehyun was fighting back a smile. “What’s he—oh. You mean Soobin-hyung?” A loud cackle escaped him after the realisation.

“Yes, he means Soobin,” Yeonjun muttered, and mentally considered throttling Wooyoung. Considering the evil grin on the idiot’s face, it would be worth suffering the consequences.

“He’s here too,” Kai answered Wooyoung’s question, ignoring Yeonjun’s glare hitting the side of his head. “We were gonna look for him right now, actually.”

“Oh, good,” Wooyoung mused, wiggling his eyebrows at Yeonjun.

“Don’t start,” Yeonjun groaned, trying to keep his smile down. Basically all his friends knew about his crush on Soobin (except Soobin, of course), so it wasn’t a new experience for him to fight off the teasing comments.

Wooyoung laughed and threw himself at Yeonjun, hugging him as he cackled. “Okay, okay, I won’t say anything.” He gave Yeonjun a kiss on the cheek before letting go completely, very much on brand for him. “I’ll let you continue on your search for him, I need to find Sannie and the others anyways. But let’s hang out some time!”

Yeonjun barely got a goodbye out before Wooyoung was out of their sight. He snorted; the whole interaction almost felt like a fever dream to him.

“He seemed nice,” Kai offhandedly commented as they started on their way outside again.

“He can be a nuisance,” Yeonjun answered as he looked around, failing to locate Soobin, “but I love him all the same. Anyone seeing Soobin?”

Yeonjun wondered if his vision was going blurry, or if Soobin really wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Maybe he had gone back inside?

When the others didn’t see him either, Yeonjun decided to pull out his phone, instinctively finding Soobin’s number and pressing the call button.  

It took a couple of seconds for Soobin to answer. “Hey, Hyung?”

The silence in the background told Yeonjun Soobin must still be somewhere outside, because no way it was that quiet inside.

“Soobinnie, where did you go?” he asked, probably sounding a bit whiny but he didn’t care. He just wanted Soobin to come back. “We’re outside but I can’t see you.”

Soobin let out a sound close to a gasp, but Yeonjun didn’t think what that could mean. “I… I’m still outside too. I, uh, I can go back to the entrance, are you close to it?”

“Yeah, we’re just outside. Why are you out here all alone?”

“I’m sorry, I’ll come meet you now.”

Soobin hung up before he could say anything else. Kai and Taehyun looked at him with questioning eyes. “He’s coming,” Yeonjun simply explained, feeling a bit confused by the shortness in Soobin’s voice.

He kept looking around, waiting for Soobin to appear in his view. Taehyun was the first to see him, pointing out how he was coming from the shadows on the side of the building.

“Soobin!” Yeonjun called out as soon as he saw him, and quickly sped up to get to his side. Once he reached him, he wrapped his arms around Soobin’s midpart, feeling a warmth spread inside him to have Soobin back by his side.

“You were gone for so long,” he whined after stepping back to look up at Soobin’s face. For perhaps the thousand time that night, Yeonjun melted at the sight of Soobin. With the bad lighting inside, he had almost forgotten how good Soobin looked when he was all dolled up like this. A rush of affection ran through him, and he instinctively squeezed Soobin’s waist where his hands were still laying comfortably.

If Soobin noticed the heart-eyed look Yeonjun was giving him, he didn’t show it. He just chuckled and shook his head fondly, giving no response. Kai and Taehyun reached them the next second and pulled Soobin’s attention over to them.

“It’s a bit nice to be out in the fresh air, isn’t it?” Taehyun said, even though he was hugging himself to avoid the cold.

Soobin glanced at Kai and Yeonjun before he answered, as if he didn’t want the two humans to take offence from not fully understanding their experience. “Yeah,” he admitted bashfully.

Oh. Yeonjun didn’t like seeing his friends uncomfortable. Suddenly, he was filled with worry that he had brought them to a place where they didn’t want to be, and he hated the thought that they weren’t enjoying themselves when he was having the time of his life until a few minutes ago.

“Let’s go home?” he asked, putting the idea out there. He had been the one to suggest going there, after all, so maybe they thought they had to stay for his sake.

“What?” Soobin wondered, looking utterly surprised. “No, hyung, it’s fine, I promise it’s not that bad—”

“Binnie,” Yeonjun interrupted, putting a hand on his arm, “I’m okay with going home. I don’t want you guys to be uncomfortable for my sake.”

Soobin and Taehyun shared a look, then Taehyun added, “it’s not that bad. We’re only complaining, it’s actually not that much worse than being in a full lecture hall.”

Somehow, Yeonjun didn’t believe that. He thought about all the sweaty, drunk people in there; the smell was potent enough for him as a human, so it had to be unbearable to them. How had he not realized that sooner?

“Hyung, really,” Soobin said, probably seeing Yeonjun’s thought process on his face. “I’m having fun, let’s stay for a while longer.”

Yeonjun made sure to look into both of their eyes for long enough to decide that he believed them when they said they wanted to stay. He then turned to Kai, as if to consult with his human friend, who just shrugged.

“Okay,” he said then, finding there was no reason to fight them on this. “Let’s go back inside.” He reached for Soobin’s hand. “But don’t leave my side again.”

Another round of shots, and Yeonjun was suddenly out of it completely. Not to say he wouldn’t remember the night – he prided himself with never having blacked out – but he was suddenly much more loose-lipped than normally.

After the round by the bar, they went to sit down, and Yeonjun was displeased when Soobin didn’t sit by his side. “Sooooobin, sit with me,” he drawled, making grabby hands at the boy. He easily got Soobin’s attention, and once he saw Soobin’s eyes on him, he slapped the seat next to him.

Perhaps Soobin was just as out of it, because he didn’t even complain before switching to sit next to Yeonjun instead of Kai. Normally, Yeonjun would’ve had to pull out his most effective weapon: pouting. But not tonight it seemed.

Yeonjun quickly attached himself to Soobin’s side, linking their arms and legs together as if trying to get them as close as possible. He was too drunk to wonder if Soobin found it weird or if he was used to this behaviour by now; Yeonjun was, after all, a clingy drunk.

“Baby, baby,” Yeonjun muttered in satisfaction as he rubbed his cheek against Soobin’s shoulder, ignoring all and any conversation going on around them. He was sure Taehyun was shaking his head at him, and Kai was likely trying not to laugh, or making a loud joke about him that he wasn’t registering. Yeonjun was used to all that, and so was Soobin. After so many years of this, Soobin had never figured out Yeonjun’s feelings, so Yeonjun wasn’t too worried about it now. “You’re my baby,” he whispered against Soobin’s skin, more to a mental image of Soobin than the actual man sitting next to him.

To his surprise, he felt Soobin start to shake, and it startled him enough to move back and stare up at his face. Only when he saw the cute scrunched up expression on Soobin’s face did he realize he was laughing. Or giggling, more like.

Elation filled Yeonjun, despite not knowing what Soobin was laughing about. He grinned back and was again caught by surprise when Soobin leaned into him, putting his face in the crook of Yeonjun’s neck.

Soobin’s nose tickled against the skin just above the neckline of his shirt, rubbing back and forth as if he was trying to nudge Yeonjun into realizing something. But it was all Yeonjun could do to sit still and not sag into Soobin or pull his face up so he could kiss him. Thankfully, the fog over his mind prevented him from doing what he so desired.

It wasn’t until someone – likely Taehyun – cleared their throat loudly and with intent that the bubble around Soobin and Yeonjun burst. Immediately, Yeonjun leaned back in his seat and pretended to be distracted by his nails, feeling an intense blush rise on his face.

Daring a glance at Taehyun, he saw the younger man frowning at Soobin, which had uncertainty arising inside Yeonjun.

As Yeonjun turned to look at Soobin, said man stood and walked away with the excuse of “getting some water for Hyung.”

As soon as he was out of ear shot, Kai let out a wolf whistle.

“What?” Yeonjun asked, an unexpected giggle bursting out of him out of confusion.

Taehyun’s previous frown had turned amused. “Soobin-hyung’s drunk,” he said, dragging out the last word in a way that made it obvious what state of intoxication he himself was in. He looked around before leaning forward, as if going to tell some deep-rooted secret. “He scented you.”

Yeonjun probably had heard the word before, but he was too drunk to remember the meaning of it. However, the way Taehyun said it made it sound like serious gossip, so Yeonjun frowned deeply and said, “I don’t know what that means.”

“You don’t know?” Taehyun shook his head at him,eyes wide and sparkly. “Scenting is like—”

Taehyun’s head snapped to the side, and Yeonjun realized a beat later that he’d cut himself off because Soobin was returning, water filled glass in hand. He seemed to be walking with determined steps, which was why his abrupt stop caused him to spill water on the person who suddenly appeared in front of him.

It was like an ice bucket had been poured over Yeonjun when he recognized the girl he’d overheard earlier at school was suddenly speaking to Soobin. The girl he had overheard talking about confessing to Soobin.

They were close enough to the table for Yeonjun to hear and see their conversation pan out.

Soobin was apologizing immensely for spilling water on her, and she was fanning her long eyelashes at him, saying she knew a way he could repay her. Yeonjun already knew where this was going, and panic was gripping him like an iron fist, pulling him to his feet and in their direction before he knew what he was doing.

He walked up to them with much more grace than he felt himself capable of, acting completely unbothered when in truth he was screaming on the inside.

“Soobinnie,” he said, gaining both of their attention in an instant. The girl’s eyes widened slightly at the sight of him, and he wondered if he looked cooler and more composed than he felt. “Did you get water for me?”

“Hyung.” Soobin gaped at him for a few seconds before catching on, looking down at the now half full glass. “Oh. Right. Water.”

Yeonjun took the glass when Soobin handed it over towards him, only to step closer and wrap an arm around Soobin’s waist. Turning to face the girl, holding onto Soobin as if they were a unit and not two separate people, Yeonjun gave her an icy but not unkind look. “Hey, I’m Yeonjun,” he greeted without any interest of shaking her hand. This was the girl who talked about his Soobin as if he was a prize. He remembered her giggling with her friends about a potential hookup with Soobin and had to force himself not to show any animosity on his face.

Yeonjun noticed her nostrils flaring and her eyes scanning over him calculatingly, seemingly forgetting or ignoring to greet Yeonjun back.

After several seconds passed without a response from her, Yeonjun turned to Soobin instead. “Are we going back to our table, Soobinnie?”

Batting his eyelashes in a similar way as the girl had done previously, Yeonjun awaited Soobin’s answer.

Stunned, Soobin coughed before he could muster up an answer. “Uh, yeah. Yeah, we should.” When Yeonjun grinned at him, he seemed to regain his bearings and smile back. “I uh,” he started, turning back to the girl to end the conversation, “I’m sorry I spilled on you, but at least it’s only water. It was nice to meet you.”

Yeonjun took great pride in the crestfallen look on her face that Soobin didn’t notice as they stepped around her and went back to the table. Their two friends were looking like question marks when they returned, and at that point Yeonjun had forgotten all about scenting and the fact that Taehyun seemed to think it was a big deal.

-

They ended up staying for another two hours. Those hours were filled with dancing, more games (because apparently the club had a whole assortment of them on the second floor) and more drinking. At the end, Taehyun had to really focus when he wrote his text message to his dad, as he muttered to himself how he never misspelled, and he wouldn’t start now.

When Taehyun’s dad pulled up outside the club and the four of them stumbled into the car, he had a fond, knowing smile on his face. He drove them all home together, as the four of them had agreed to end the night with a sleepover at Tae’s place.

Yeonjun knew he was probably embarrassingly drunk, but he didn’t care at all what anyone thought of the way he clung to Soobin in the car and then all the way up Taehyun’s driveway. Soobin was warm, and Yeonjun felt so happy when Soobin didn’t push his hands away as he walked with them wrapped around Soobin’s midpart. He was about to whine when Soobin carefully lifted them from around him as they reached the stairs to the second floor, but he stopped when he realized Soobin had only done that so they could walk up the stairs hand in hand instead. Yeonjun blushed as Soobin squeezed his hand in his and led the way up the stairs.

The four friends ended up spread out in Taehyun’s room; the youngest two cuddling on Tae’s bed, while Yeonjun and Soobin were lying in a heap on his small sofa. It was a sofa bed that they could easily pull out to make themselves more comfortable, but the thought didn’t seem to cross their minds.

“We should brush our teeth,” Soobin mumbled against Yeonjun’s neck, where he was nuzzling his face against Yeonjun’s skin, his nose rubbing gently.

“Mm, we should,” Yeonjun agreed, but made no move to do so. Soobin let out a sigh, which tickled Yeonjun’s skin, making him gasp in surprise. His reaction was to put his hand on Soobin’s head, carding his fingers through his hair. To him it was a natural reaction to Soobin using him as a cuddle pillow. It wasn’t the first time they were in that position, and he hoped it wouldn’t be the last.

When Yeonjun giggled as his fingers kept running through Soobin’s hair, Soobin lifted his face to give him a confused look. “Why are you laughing?”

“It’s just—” Yeonjun’s eyes met Soobin, and he couldn’t help grinning, “your hair is so fried.”

He’d noticed it as the way his hair felt in his fingers was different than before and realized Soobin dyeing his hair had done quite some damage.

A soft blow came to his arm, making him laugh again. “What, Bin-ah? It’s true.”

“I know, but you don’t have to mention it,” Soobin muttered, putting his head down so Yeonjun couldn’t see his expression any longer.

“I’m not saying it to insult you,” Yeonjun mused. “And besides, I think it’s worth it.”

“What’s worth it?”

“Killing your hair.” Yeonjun tickled Soobin’s ear, rubbing it gently before pulling slightly to get Soobin to look at him again. He felt his breath hitch at the sight when Soobin, eyes glazed over from drunkenness and face in bliss from being caressed, met his eyes. It was such an incredible sight, something Yeonjun sometimes couldn’t believe he was allowed to see. Sure, he was Soobin’s best friend, but this was so much closer than he had been with any of his other friends before. When he spoke next, his voice came out much softer, almost a whisper. “You look so good in red hair, Bin-ah.”

His eyes betrayed him by moving down to Soobin’s lips, the lips which looked more inviting than ever, especially with the smile that was stretching them.

“I do?”

“Yes.” Yeonjun was almost about to scowl at him for doubting his words. Hadn’t he already told Soobin what he thought about his hair? He knew Soobin had always been self-conscious and had a hard time believing anyone could find him attractive, but sometimes he found it a bit ridiculous. Sure, he understood that not everyone could have a flawless confidence – not even he did, even though he prided himself with being comfortable in his own skin – but Soobin was so incredibly beautiful that it just didn’t make sense for him to be so unsure of his own prettiness. Inside and out, there was no one as beautiful as Soobin.

Whenever Soobin doubted Yeonjun’s compliments, it made Yeonjun want to shower him in them even more. “Believe me, Bin-ah.” He ran his hand over Soobin’s forehead, moving his bangs away to get a better look at his face. Soobin’s makeup was a bit messier than it had been at the start of the night, but it still gave him more of an edge than normal. “Ah, Soobin, you look so s—”

If Yeonjun was religious he would have thanked the heavens for giving him the ability to realize what he was saying and stop himself, especially in his drunken state. Shit. The word he had been thinking. Sexy. He had almost told Soobin that. His face flushed very red in seconds, and Yeonjun had to look away as Soobin gave him a questioning look, wondering what he was about to say. But Yeonjun could never in his life repeat it, because no. That was a line he couldn’t cross. As Soobin’s best friend, he could call him pretty and hot and beautiful, he could hit his butt and tease him endlessly, but he couldn’t say that. Soobin would figure it out if he did.

Soobin pouted at him when he moved to sit up. With a slight beating in the back of his head, alerting him of the upcoming hangover, he coughed and changed the subject. “Let’s go brush our teeth.”

“Hyung—”

Yeonjun pulled on Soobin’s hand and managed to drag him over to Taehyun’s bathroom. He caught sight of the younger two, already asleep in each other’s arms on top of the covers. It was a cute and comfortable sight, and it helped calm his nerves slightly.

They brushed their teeth together, which was a quite fun experience. Soobin was very thorough and made them brush for longer than Yeonjun normally had patience for, which led to both of their mouths being covered with foam. It caused Yeonjun to laugh, sputtering some of the liquid in his mouth on the mirror.

After who knows how long of them laughing and trying to dry the other’s face (and after Yeonjun forced Soobin to let him take off the makeup from his face with some wipes), they fell back on the sofa in a similar way to before. Soobin’s head was once again tucked into Yeonjun’s neck, where Yeonjun swore it fit perfectly.

Yeonjun had thought he wasn’t sleepy, but after a few minutes of Soobin nuzzling into his neck and rubbing his nose against his skin, the comfort of it all started making his eyes droopy. He wished he could have watched Soobin in that position for a bit longer, but there was nothing he could do as he was pulled into a peaceful sleep.

Chapter Text

Taehyun’s mother was kind enough to serve breakfast to the four of them the morning after the party. Yeonjun made sure to thank her deeply, because he was way too hungover to have energy to create anything worth eating.

Although Kai seemed to be the one who had drawn the shortest straw, hangover wise, as he seemed barely unable to move his head once he had plopped down in his seat. “My head’s beating,” he complained, earning himself a few chuckles from his friends. He only grunted in reply and closed his eyes, leaning his head on one of his hands.

“Aww, poor Hyuka,” Yeonjun tutted, pulling out the nickname Kai once admitted his parents used to call him when he was small. Suddenly he was feeling a lot less annoyed by his own headache as he was sure the maknae had it worse. “Shouldn’t have taken that last shot.”

Kai shot him a deadly glare before groaning and closing his eyes again.

Soobin, who had been preparing the coffee machine until then, came carrying four empty cups and sat down next to Yeonjun. “Maybe we should give him an aspirin?” He questioned, his eyes worried as he glanced at Kai.

“Let him try the coffee first and see if that helps,” Taehyun suggested with a shrug. He looked every bit like he had just rolled out of bed; hair ruffled and standing in every direction, eyes half closed and face a bit puffy from sleep. Yeonjun noticed the leftover makeup smudged across his eyes, and was thankful that his own drunk self had remembered to remove his own makeup.

They dove into the food, and despite all of them not feeling their best, the conversation was light and filled with laughter. Yeonjun did his best to stomach the food that Soobin served him, because it felt so good and domestic to have Soobin do that for him.

Ten minutes in, Soobin remembered to check on the coffee machine, and left the table to go grab the pot. He’d left his phone face up on the table, just inches from Yeonjun’s arm, and Yeonjun normally wouldn’t have thought twice about it if Soobin’s phone hadn’t buzzed loudly and flashed alive with an incoming message. Instinctively, Yeonjun’s eyes drifted to the screen, reading the words.

BG

Hey handsome, wanna talk today? 😉

Yeonjun stared at the screen until it went back to black, and then a little longer.

Who sent that message? BG? Yeonjun didn’t know anyone with those initials. And what. What did that message mean? And the winky face?

“Hyung, why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” Taehyun asked, but Yeonjun shook his head as Soobin came back to his seat in that moment. He didn’t seem to realize his phone had received a message, all too occupied to pour the coffee in their cups.

He waited for half a minute, trying to come up with a way to ask Soobin who was texting him without sounding like a complete lunatic. But he just couldn’t help it; the thought of Soobin receiving flirty texts from someone Yeonjun had never even heard of made an ugly feeling grow inside him.

In the end, he didn’t need to ask himself, because Kai – who had indeed become slightly more alive once he got some coffee inside him – had complained about his phone being dead and grabbed Soobin’s (since it was the only one in sight at the time) to play some games.

Yeonjun saw it on his face as Kai noticed the message, and briefly wondered what Kai’s thoughts about it was.

“Oh hyung~.” A smirk grew on his face, which pulled Tae’s attention to the screen as well. “Who’s this sending you messages?” He turned the screen to show the oblivious Soobin. “BG?”

Perplexed, Yeonjun stared at Soobin as a redness slowly spread across his cheeks. He looked like he had been caught stealing, the way his eyes widened, and he quickly snatched his phone away from Kai’s hands.

“That person was clearly flirting with you. Who is it? Did you meet someone yesterday?” Kai kept asking, his tone light-hearted and teasing. “Wait—did you hookup with someone yesterday

As Kai kept teasing Soobin, Yeonjun turned his gaze on his own coffee cup. He tried not to let the words get to him, but it was hard not to picture Soobin flirting with someone else yesterday and asking for their number.

“It’s… no.” Soobin tried to explain, but he failed to keep his composure. “It’s just a guy I talked to yesterday.” He looked down at his phone, and then he startled the whole table as he stood up abruptly. “I’ll be right back,” he exclaimed before rushing to the bathroom.

“Okaay, weird,” Kai said, looking between Tae and Yeonjun to see their reaction.

“It’s probably nothing,” Taehyun said, his eyes on Yeonjun. “It’s just someone he talked to, it’s probably no big deal.”

Except the fact that that someone was obviously flirting with Soobin, even if Soobin’s intentions were innocent.

All at once, Kai seemed to remember about Yeonjun’s feelings for Soobin, and his face turned from satisfied to horrified in a second. “Oh, damn, hyung I’m sorry—”

“No, no,” Yeonjun reassured them, forcing a smile on his face. “It’s fine. He can talk to whoever he wants, of course.”

Both of them eyed him suspiciously as he continued staring at his coffee, swirling the liquid around for a while. With milk, it wasn’t too hot to drink, but he was too preoccupied with his thoughts to think about drinking it.

He tried to wrap his head around it. Soobin had said this was a guy, someone he had talked to yesterday. This guy was clearly flirting with him, judging by the choice of words for the morning greeting. He had asked if Soobin wanted to talk today… what did that mean? Had they talked yesterday and decided to meet up today? Was Soobin going on a date with a person he had met briefly at the bar just yesterday?

The thought squeezed Yeonjun’s heart. Ever since he had realized his feelings for Soobin, he had expected the moment Soobin fell for someone else to come sooner or later. It wasn’t like it was unexpected, since he himself had dated a few times over the years. Knowing it was bound to happen didn’t make him any more prepared for it, though. And what was worse was that he had been telling himself over and over that Soobin just didn’t feel the same way because he wasn’t interested in guys, but now Soobin was going on a date with a guy he only just met?

No, wait. Back up a second. Who was saying Soobin would go on a date with this stranger? Why was he jumping to such conclusions after one text? Soobin had said it was just someone he had talked to. Sure, the text had been flirty, but it didn’t have to mean Soobin was interested in him back. Although, the way he disappeared into the bathroom sure was suspicious.

“Hyung, stop overthinking,” Taehyun said, waving his hand in front of Yeonjun’s zoned out eyes. “I can smell the distaste on you.”

Glancing at the bathroom door, which was still closed, Yeonjun answered, “it’s not like I’m doing it on purpose…”

“Of course, but you don’t know if it’s anything to be upset about just yet.”

He sighed. Taehyun was right, of course. But he wasn’t very good at convincing himself it would be okay after his thoughts got down in the deep.

Maybe five minutes later, Soobin came out of the bathroom and joined them by the table again. He ignored the looks from Taehyun and Kai, and also didn’t seem to notice the gloomy look on Yeonjun’s face.

They continued their breakfast in silence for a few minutes, until Kai broke it by babbling about a new series he’d started watching recently. He managed to pull a few smiles out from his friends, and Yeonjun was thankful for the change of topic.

An hour passed with the four of them lounging about in Taehyun’s room. It was their common routine of hangover days, just doing nothing but being in each other’s company. It was nice, familiar, leaving Yeonjun content. Soon he forgot about the text Soobin had received.

That was, until Soobin left the sofa and said he had some place to be. At that point, Yeonjun’s mood crashed again.

“What?” he asked, incredulous. Soobin hadn’t mentioned having anything to do for the whole day.

“I have to go,” Soobin repeated, as if Yeonjun’s reaction had been due to not having heard him. It clearly was not.

“Yeah, but where? Did you think to tell us you weren’t gonna hang out today?”

“I—” Soobin blanked, his eyes freezing on Yeonjun as he clearly tried to come up with an excuse.

As Soobin thought, Yeonjun tried figuring it out by himself. Who could Soobin be going to meet that he wouldn’t tell them about? It couldn’t be his parents, then he would’ve just said he was going home. Maybe one of his other friends – like Changmin – but then he’d have told them. Then… the only other explanation was—

“It’s that BG, isn’t it?” he said, his words coming out more as a statement than a question. He knew he sounded more irritated than he had the right to be, but he just couldn’t help it. It wasn’t often he got annoyed with Soobin, but when he did, he wanted the other to know it. He felt wronged because Soobin never kept things secret from him.

“I-um, it’s just, he wanted to talk, so we’re meeting up and—"

“And?” Yeonjun had stood up as well now, crossing his arms over his chest as he glared at Soobin. From the corner of his eye, he could see Kai trying to get his attention, to maybe snap him out of his annoyance, but he ignored him.

“Why are you angry?” Soobin said then, arguing back.

“I’m not angry.”

“Yes, you are. Why does it matter to you where I’m going?”

That was a good question. Well, Yeonjun knew the answer, but he couldn’t tell Soobin that. Maybe he should have tried to come up with another answer, but when Soobin was suddenly looking at him with wide, angry eyes, his mind didn’t give him the slightest answer.

“Look, Hyung,” Soobin said with an annoyed huff. “I have to go. I’ll text you guys later.”

Yeonjun was left feeling a bit stunned as Soobin left the room.

An eerie silence filled the space until Kai cleared his throat. “Well,” he said.

Yeonjun huffed in annoyance and sat back down in his seat. He tried to keep the anger up, to prevent the sadness he knew undoubtedly was about to come creeping into his heart.

“I fucking hate when you guys fight,” Taehyun said, causing Yeonjun to whip his head in his direction. He looked a bit shellshocked, and when Yeonjun realized it was his fault he felt guilty.

“Sorry, Tae.” He muttered, leaning his head against the younger’s head. “S’not like I love it either.”

“It was stupid,” Tae added.

“It wasn’t even a real fight,” Kai filled in. He gave a sigh and grabbed a controller for the PS3, probably thinking to turn on a game to take their minds off of things. “I wonder who BG is, though,” he added nonchalantly, his attention on the TV.

“Yeah,” Yeonjun said with a sigh. “So do I.”

-

When four hours had passed and Yeonjun still hadn’t heard anything from Soobin, his guilt started taking over him. He had just left Taehyun’s place, going back to his own apartment, and tried calling Soobin on the way.

No answer.

He sent a few texts as well, apologizing and asking what he was up to.

When he arrived at home fifteen minutes later, Soobin still hadn’t answered.

And after he had showered and made coffee for himself, his notifications were still lacking any response from his best friend.

-

Yeonjun was sitting by his desk, deeply focused on the paper he was writing. The assignment wasn’t due for another two weeks, so he was in no rush whatsoever. The thing was, he had expected to spend the evening studying with Soobin, which would mean they wouldn’t really get that much done due to talking or goofing around, which was fine since he wasn’t in a hurry. Now, with Soobin ignoring him, there was nothing better to do than get some words down, he supposed.

When his phone started ringing, Yeonjun expected it to be his mom, and so he didn’t rush to answer. But when he had his phone in his hand, he realized it was Soobin.

He contemplated whether to answer or be petty for so long that Soobin had ended the call before he made his decision. With a huff, Yeonjun pursed his lips. He considered the time – it was past 6 and it had been 2 hours since he’d tried to contact Soobin – and wondered if he had the right to be petty. He was partly in the wrong for getting annoyed in the first place so—

The phone was ringing again in his hands, and this time he answered immediately.

“Hey,” he answered, trying to sound nonchalant but probably failing.

“Hey Hyung,” Soobin greeted, something akin to relief in his voice. “Sorry for not answering for so long. Are you…” he paused, and Yeonjun could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

“Am I what? Soobinnie?”

Yeonjun knew that by using the nickname, Soobin would understand that he wasn’t mad any longer. Still, Soobin had to ask to make sure, it seemed. “Are you still mad at me?”

“I wasn’t really that mad. Maybe a bit bummed that you ignored my texts and calls for 2 hours, but it’s alright.”

“Oh. Okay, good. ‘Cuz…” there came a knock on his door. “I’m outside.”

Yeonjun sat there stunned for several seconds before springing into action.

When he opened the door, a nervous Soobin stood behind it. “Hey.”

Yeonjun couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle. Soobin was so cute standing there that he didn’t find it in himself to hold on to his irritation. “Hey,” he said back, grinning.

Saying nothing more, he opened the door and let Soobin come inside. After a few steps, Soobin was mirroring his grin.

It turned out Soobin had brought food, which was very fortunate seeing as Yeonjun hadn’t had dinner yet.

Yeonjun was glad they were back to normal. Dinner passed without any strain in the conversation, and afterwards Soobin had made himself comfortable on Yeonjun’s bed while Yeonjun sat at his desk, computer up and ready. He wasn’t facing the table, though.

Soobin had turned on some music at a low volume and was lying on his back looking up at the ceiling. At the same time, Yeonjun was watching him.

Yeonjun was, of course, itching to ask what Soobin had done all day. At the same time, he refused to ask, knowing the answer would just sour his mood again. If Soobin wasn’t going to bring it up, Yeonjun wouldn’t either. 

“How’s your essay going?” Soobin asked, and Yeonjun realized he had been caught staring when Soobin’s head tilted so he could see him.

“Splendid,” Yeonjun said as he turned back to his computer, clearing his throat.

For the next fifteen minutes, Yeonjun did his best to try and get into the writing. He needed to do research for it, which was a hassle and would take time.

He had finally found a useful article and gotten in the zone when Soobin brought him out of it again. “Hyung?”

And since Yeonjun couldn’t ignore Soobin, he instantly removed his hands from the keyboard and focused his eyes on his friend. “Mm?”

“Do you and Tae ever talk about relationships and such?”

Yeonjun blinked once, feeling like his heart was about to stop.

What?

No.

No. Soobin couldn’t know. 

Poker face, he told himself as he tried to not panic. Poker face right the fuck now.

“Uh, what do you mean?”

“I… I mean, since you’re both, you know, you’re both gay, and maybe you can, like, relate to each other more. I don’t know, I was just wondering…”

Soobin was stuttering, looking nervous, and something about the way he wasn’t looking at him made it possible for Yeonjun to breathe out. Sure, he didn’t know how Soobin would react to figuring out his feelings for him, but he was pretty sure Soobin would at least be looking at him and explaining how he knew. Right now, Soobin was asking about something else, he was certain.

“I guess sometimes we talk about it, but it’s more about when we find someone attractive and things like that,” he answered, having turned around now so he could study Soobin’s expression. Soobin was still lying on his back, though, so he couldn’t see more than the mop of red hair facing him. “Why are you asking?”

“I don’t know I… after the party I guess I got curious. You spent more time with him than me so I don’t know if… anything happened when you were dancing or—”

Yeonjun couldn’t help snorting. At being interrupted, Soobin frowned, so Yeonjun rushed to explain himself. “Actually, it was the opposite of that. Some people were trying to hit on Tae and I tried to ward them off. Other than that.” He shrugged. “We were just dancing.”

Soobin hummed. “Alright.”

“What…” Yeonjun hesitated, unsure whether he really wanted to know what he was thinking to ask. “What about you?”

“Me? Nothing happened. Nothing with the ‘ladies’, if that’s what you were asking about.”

Yeonjun fixed his gaze on his screen, embarrassed. “Okay. But you had fun, right?”

“Of course. I’m glad we went.”

“Me too.”

Soobin closed his eyes. He looked very peaceful like that, like he could fall asleep any second. Yeonjun imagined himself closing his computer and walking over there, bending over and grabbing Soobin’s face to give him a gentle kiss. It was a picture of domesticity that he longed for but would never get to experience.  

Expecting the conversation to be over, Yeonjun turned his attention back to his screen, only to startle when Soobin spoke again.

“How did you know your sexuality, Hyung?”

Soobin kept his eyes closed as he asked, and Yeonjun wished he could see the emotion in them. He didn’t know what to make of the question, if this was Soobin’s way of bringing up his own sexuality or if he was simply curious. They never did talk about this after Yeonjun came out, after all.

“I kind of always had a feeling,” he answered simply.

“Like, when you were a kid? When we were small and playing that game where the girls tried to catch us and kiss us?”

Yeonjun snickered. “Why do you think I ran so hard?”

“No one could catch you,” Soobin replied with a huge grin on his face. It soon disappeared, though, and was replaced by a thoughtful look. “You’re lucky. I don’t think everyone can figure themselves out that easily.”

Did he dare think Soobin was saying what he thought he was saying? “Soobin…?”

With a sigh, Soobin opened his eyes, but he didn’t look up at Yeonjun. “I don’t know. This whole ‘knowing your sexuality’ thing is annoying. With my dad asking me about mating, I keep thinking about what kind of relationship I want and… I don’t really have an answer to that. I just… I wish…”

“What?” The word almost came out as a whisper. Yeonjun felt like his heart was holding out for something he didn’t dare wish for.

“I wish it could just be simple. You know, like you know who you like, and you want to be with that person.” Suddenly, his eyes flickered up to meet Yeonjun’s. “No need to know what to call yourself.”

There was a tense, suspense filled silence. Yeonjun might have held his breath.

Then, Soobin let out a snort and turned to lay on his side, his face no longer visible to Yeonjun. The seriousness of their conversation was gone, but Yeonjun felt like he needed to say one more thing.

“You know,” he said, trying to make his voice sound light and humorous to fit the sudden change in the air, “it can be that simple. You only need to find the right person.”

They both took an uneasy breath, neither of them saying anything more.

-

Yeonjun spent his Sunday doing his best to be productive and get some schoolwork done. He wasn’t as efficient as he would have liked, and on Monday morning he was complaining to Soobin about it.

They were on their way to enter the classroom to the one class they shared together, a few minutes early. Soobin had an amused look on his face as he listened to Yeonjun’s complaints about how he wished TikTok didn’t exist because now that he had it he couldn’t go without it, even if it was his main source of procrastination.

“You know you could just erase the app,” Soobin supplied, not understanding the big deal since he himself had not fallen for the charms of TikTok.

Yeonjun scoffed. “And take the easy way out?”

They sat down in their usual seats in the middle of the lecture hall and started packing up their stuff. “Just admit you’re addicted,” Soobin said, giving Yeonjun a look.

“Addicted? Me? You know there’s—”

Yeonjun was cut off by another person joining their row and stepping up just next to Soobin, greeting him with a loud, “Soobin, hey! Didn’t I tell you we were in the same class?”

Soobin looked stunned for a second before he relaxed. “Hey, you did, yeah.”

Yeonjun stared at the newcomer, a handsome guy with dark hair and a heart shaped face. He recognized the guy as one of their course mates, someone he’d noticed but never had a reason to talk to before.

As the guy went to sit in the seat next to Soobin, Yeonjun waited for Soobin to introduce him so that he could get a name to the guy. However, the introduction never came, and the guy didn’t give as much as a glance in Yeonjun’s direction.

The two of them conversed for the next couple of minutes. Yeonjun’s irritation from being excluded had been growing with every passing second. Sure, he could forgive Soobin for forgetting to introduce him, but the way he was pretty much ignoring him as he talked to the new guy bothered him. Soobin was completely engrossed in this guy, and here he was sitting, Soobin’s best friend, being ignored like a fly on the wall.

Finally, their teacher entered the room and started the lecture. Yeonjun was, for once, glad for it since it cut their conversation short. As the lecture went on, he sent a few glances to his left to study Soobin’s face, but he couldn’t see any remorse for completely side-tracking Yeonjun.

And so, for the entirety of the two-hour lecture, there was a sour expression on Yeonjun’s face. It was the longest lesson he had had to sit through in a while, or at least it felt like it. He tried telling himself to let it go, that there was no use in being angry at Soobin when the only thing Soobin had done was give his attention to someone else for five minutes.

Eventually – finally – the teacher wrapped things up. Yeonjun was half expecting to get introduced then, and he turned around in his seat to face Soobin and the unknown boy, only to see said guy quickly pushing his things down into his bag and standing.

“Have to rush, see you later, Soobin!”

Yeonjun let out an incredulous scoff as Soobin waved goodbye.

“So… mind telling me who that was?”

There was a look of surprise on Soobin’s face as he turned to look at Yeonjun. What, had he forgotten Yeonjun was even there? “Huh? Oh! That was Beomgyu. Apparently, we’ve shared this class with him all semester.”

“Yeah, I gathered that much. How do you know him, then?”

Soobin shrugged. “It was pretty random. He just started talking to me, so now we know each other’s name.”

Yeonjun felt like there had to be more to the story than that, but he wanted to stop talking (and thinking) about this Beomgyu, so he’d rather just ignore whatever hunch he was having. “Whatever. Let’s go get lunch.”

-

The next day, Soobin, Yeonjun, and Kai stood in a huddle outside the entrance to their school. They were waiting for Taehyun to arrive so they could go for their weekly hang out at the arcade.

Kai and Yeonjun were stuck in an argument about which game was the best, with Soobin standing between them and only looking from one to the other with an amused look on his face.

Yeonjun was just about to lay out his winning argument when all three of them sensed a presence closely behind them. Expecting it to be Taehyun, they went quiet and turned to face him.

It wasn’t Taehyun.

“Soobin, hi,” said Beomgyu, looking only at Soobin at first. “I could see you from over there, so I thought I’d say hi.” Yeonjun was about to roll his eyes in annoyance for being ignored again, when he saw the way Beomgyu’s eyes moved down and up again.

Wait… did he just check Soobin out?

“Hi Beomgyu,” Soobin greeted, and Yeonjun was disgruntled to see the wide smile on Soobin’s face. He couldn’t help checking out Soobin’s outfit as well and mentally cursed that Soobin had picked today to look so cute.

“Um, this is Kai,” Soobin said, actually introducing them this time. Yeonjun had to immediately look away when Soobin glanced towards him. “And Yeonjun-Hyung you met yesterday.”

Yeonjun and Beomgyu locked eyes. “Yes! Sorry, I didn’t have time to introduce myself yesterday,” Beomgyu said, a smile on his face as if that would make everything better.

Yeonjun just nodded, saying it was no big deal. On the inside, he was wondering when this rude asshole was leaving.

“So,” Beomgyu asked, his eyes shifting back to Soobin, “what are you guys doing standing here?”

Soobin explained shortly that they were waiting for Taehyun, to which Beomgyu nodded in understanding. Then, he opened his mouth again and said words Yeonjun wished he hadn’t. “Do you want to join us? It’s always good fun, I don’t think another head would hurt.”

If Yeonjun had been a rude person, he could have intervened and just bluntly objected. He really didn’t want Beomgyu to come. But he wasn’t a rude person, so he kept his mouth shut.

To his surprise (and relief), Beomgyu declined. “Oh no, I don’t want to intrude,” he said. “I also have someplace to be. But maybe you can take me there some time?” He clearly said the last words to Soobin in particular, giving him a flattering and expecting look.

Yeonjun could only stare as Soobin said, “Sure, why not?” Soobin was even shrugging, as if he didn’t hear the implication behind those words.

“Perfect!” Beomgyu beamed. He glanced at his phone, then, checking the time. “I have to go now, but it was nice meeting you guys.”

Kai and Soobin said likewise, but Yeonjun didn’t bother. He was fully focused on trying not to glare as Beomgyu waved and left.

Not long thereafter, the one they had been waiting for finally arrived. “Who was that you were talking to?” Taehyun asked as they started moving.

“Soobin’s new bestie,” Yeonjun answered gruffly. In his annoyance he started walking faster than them, and so he was one step in front of the other three. It was a good thing they couldn’t see his face.

“I literally met him a few days ago,” Soobin said with a snort.

Yeonjun turned his head and glared at Soobin. “Yeah, but you still invited him to our plans like you’ve known him forever.”

Soobin’s face shifted from amusement to guilt. “Hyung,” he said as he sped up so he could grab Yeonjun’s arm as they walked. Yeonjun rolled his eyes and kept his eyes on the road.

“Sorry,” Soobin continued, tilting his head to try and get a look at Yeonjun’s face. “I didn’t think it would be a big deal. Next time I’ll ask you first.” He tugged a little on Yeonjun’s arm, putting his arms around his waist. “But you know he’s not my bestie, Hyung. You are.”

Yeonjun knew he shouldn’t give in so easily, but one look sideways at Soobin was enough to make his irritation dissipate. He never could stay mad at Soobin, especially not when he looked at him like that. It was perhaps the cutest view he had ever seen. Also, Soobin’s words warmed his insides, so he smiled and rolled his eyes. “Fine. Sorry for being all grumpy.”

-

Yeonjun had the pleasure of not having to see Beomgyu for the rest of the school week. Then came the weekend, and on Saturday he found himself caught up in having to clean his entire apartment. He had invited Wooyoung, who in turn was bringing his bestie-slash-on-and-off-boyfriend, San, and another friend named Yunho.

When he was in the middle of scrubbing away all the coffee stains on the kitchen table, the ringing of his phone made him freeze. He went to check it and was surprised to find it was his mother calling.

As it wasn’t commonplace for her to call on a Saturday afternoon, Yeonjun quickly answered, hoping nothing was wrong.

“Hey, mom.”

“Hello,” his mother greeted, her tone as normal to his ears. “How is my favourite son?”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes fondly. “I’m your only son, though.” He imagined the smile on her face. “I’m good, mom. Nothing to complain about, really.”

“That’s good to hear,” she answered. “And how is school? Have you been settled in okay for the start of the year?”

Yeonjun realized how long it must have been since they last talked if she hadn’t heard from him since school started. He quickly gave her the standard run through, explaining which classes he was taking and what he had in store for the rest of the semester. She seemed genuinely interested, so for a moment he thought this was just a regular call because she was missing him.

But when there was nothing more for him to fill her in about, she changed track of the conversation.

“Have you been watching the news lately?” she asked, and Yeonjun halted in his wiping the dust off his bookshelf at the sound of her voice. There was a slight strain, as if there was some urgency in what she was asking suddenly.

“Uh, I don’t know, not really.” Yeonjun did own a TV, but there were no channels on it, so he didn’t exactly have a means to watch the news, and he was terrible at keeping up with news articles. “Why, is there something I should see?”

His mother was quiet for a few seconds before sighing. “Seoul isn’t safe right now,” she told him. “There have been a lot of missing cases lately, all young guys around your age.”

Yeonjun sat down, frowning. “Oh. Actually, I did hear some people talking about it. I didn’t realize there was more than one missing person, though.”

She hummed. “It’s four now. Enough for them to be able to see some patterns.”

As she talked, he put her on speaker, and started searching the news for the story. Once he found an article, he started scanning the words at the same time as he tried to take in what his mom was saying.

“It’s only human boys, and all around your age,” she continued. “I just wanted to make sure you are aware, and that you are careful. Maybe you should be more careful around the lycans for now, you never know who might—”

Yeonjun froze at the mention of lycans. “Mom.” He said the word harshly enough to cut her off. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“Yeonjun, I just want you to be careful and-“

“Mom, are you saying lycans are kidnapping humans? There’s no evidence for that.”

“It’s a reasonable suspicion,” she said firmly. “Anyways, it doesn’t hurt to keep a bit of a distance to the lycans, at least until the situation calms down.”

“Mom, you can’t condemn all lycans like that. You know two of my best friends are lycans. You know Soobin and Tae.”

She sounded impatient by now, and Yeonjun felt the same way for a completely different reason. “I know, love, I’m not saying they are necessarily the problem, but you don’t understand, they are different than us. You don’t know what urges might compel them to—”

“Oh my god, mom, stop! Please, just… stop. You can’t insult my friends like that.”

“I’m not insulting your friends, you know I adore Soobin and—”

“But you are, you’re insulting them!” Yeonjun ran a hand frustratedly across his face. He took a deep breath before continuing. “Just… mom, I love you, but I think you’re wrong. Please think about what it is you are saying, okay? Talk to you later.”

He didn’t wait for her response before ending the call. Then, for a minute or two, he just sat there staring down at his phone.

Part of him wasn’t really that surprised to hear his mother say that. He knew they didn’t – couldn’t – have the same view on everything in life. Still, it pained him to hear her be so prejudiced towards people who had done nothing to deserve that.

“-what urges might compel them—” he grumpily muttered the words she’d said to him out loud into his empty apartment. It was ridiculous.

He almost wanted to call her back just to talk some sense into her, to explain that what she had just said was racist and that he wasn’t okay with it. He knew he had to; he couldn’t just let it go without at least trying to get her to see what was wrong with what she just said. But right now wasn’t a good time. It was better to calm down and take that conversation another day.

Yeonjun was grateful, in a way, that she had called him that day, because at least he would be distracted from any thoughts of her for the rest of the night when his friends would arrive. He hoped they wouldn’t notice his bad mood, and that the night would end up as good as he had thought it would before her call.

-

Monday came, and of course Beomgyu was there again. Like last week, he arrived after them and confidently sat down in the seat next to Soobin.

In the middle of the class, a movement in Yeonjun’s peripheral view drew his attention. He looked left, only to see that Beomgyu had sent a written message to Soobin on a piece of paper. From his seat, Yeonjun couldn’t see the words, but he could make out the many rows filled on that paper. Apparently, the two had been holding a conversation like that for quite some time without him noticing.

After he did notice, though, it annoyed the hell out of him.

Once Beomgyu sent the paper back to Soobin for the fourth time, and Yeonjun noticed Soobin was trying to hold back a laugh, Yeonjun had had enough. He turned his own notebook around and wrote his own message on a piece of paper before ripping it out. Then, he quietly smashed it down on Soobin’s bench, clenching his teeth as he did so.

On the paper, he had written: Will the two of you stop being annoying, you’re disturbing the lecture.

It seemed to get the message across, because Yeonjun didn’t see any movement from their side after that. He kept his gaze on the board, trying to focus on their teacher, while still fuming on the inside.

After class, Beomgyu had to run just like the week before. It left Soobin and an annoyed Yeonjun walking together to the cafeteria.

“What were you two talking about, before?” Yeonjun asked once they were standing in line to buy food. He knew he was being petty and not fair to Soobin, so this was his way of trying to even out his mood.

“Me and Beomgyu?” Yeonjun nodded stiffly. “He, um, asked how Odi was doing, and then he was making stupid jokes, basically.”

“How does he know about Odi?” Yeonjun knew Soobin hadn’t mentioned Odi to Beomgyu when he had been present, which meant Soobin must have talked to Beomgyu at some other time on his own.

“He asked me if I had any pets, so I sent him a picture of him yesterday. It was really cute, actually,” Soobin pulled out his phone to show the picture to Yeonjun, his face beaming at the mention of his cute hedgehog. It truly was a very cute picture, but Yeonjun couldn’t enjoy it as all he could think about was that Soobin and Beomgyu was on a texting basis now.

As they made their way to the cafeteria in their usual manner, they were stopped by a pair – a girl and a guy – mid hallway. Embarrassingly enough, it seemed the girl had forced her friend (who happened to be a guy Yeonjun recognized from his dance school) to approach Yeonjun and ask him out.

Yeonjun felt bad for turning him down, he really did. But he couldn’t fool himself to think that dating someone else would make him love Soobin any less any longer. Still, turning the guy down – in front of Soobin, none the less – was awkward as hell.

Once the rejection was done and the guy had tampered off with his friend, Yeonjun and Soobin resumed their walk to the cafeteria in silence. Yeonjun wanted to glance at Soobin to gather his reaction, but the fear that Soobin wouldn’t be bothered at all prevented him from doing so.

When they sat down by their table, Kai and Taehyun were discussing something and only acknowledged them with short nods. Yeonjun was thankful for the lack of questioning looks (considering his face was likely still very red) and dug into his food immediately. He let himself hope that what happened earlier would be left alone and he could suppress the memory as soon as possible.

Unfortunately, Soobin had other plans.

“Yeonjun was just asked out by some dance dude,” Soobin stated, and the way he said it almost said like he was just thinking out loud, because he looked a bit zoned out. He hadn’t touched his food yet, and he didn’t look at any of them.

“You were?” Taehyun asked, turning to stare at Yeonjun.

Groaning and putting his cutleries down, Yeonjun tried to explain shortly. He didn’t want to linger on the topic. “His name is Wooseok. It was pretty unexpected.”

“And? What did you say?” Kai asked, beaming as he always did at news like this.

“He rejected him,” Soobin answered before Yeonjun could. Suddenly, his eyes fell on Yeonjun. “But you didn’t really say why. Why did you do that?”

Feeling his blush darkening, Yeonjun tried to act like he wasn’t flustered at all. “I wasn’t interested.”

“But… he was cute, wasn’t he?”

Yeonjun shared a look with Taehyun before rolling his eyes. “You thought that cashier that gave you her number was cute, yet you never ended up texting her, did you?”

Soobin blinked in confusion at the mention of the girl, looking like he wanted to say some more on the topic. Before he could, Taehyun seemed to take Yeonjun’s begging look seriously and started up a new conversation.

For the rest of their lunch time, Soobin was suddenly very enveloped in his phone, in a back-and-forth text conversation it seemed, judging by the faces he was making as he was looking at his phone.

Like always, it bugged Yeonjun whenever Soobin’s attention wasn’t on him. It felt even more strange that Soobin changed from being so interested in what Yeonjun had to say about Wooseok, to suddenly completely zoning out of any conversation with him and their friends. If they had been at a less public space he might have reached over and tried to grab his attention, to try to annoy him until he gave him his focus, but he wasn’t comfortable to do so in school. Which led to him trying to focus on Kai and Tae, trying to keep up with the conversation, but his eyes kept glancing back at Soobin every ten seconds.

When they separated after lunch later, Soobin’s phone was back in his pocket. Yeonjun desperately wanted to know who he’d been talking to, but he feared the answer so much that he’d rather ignore his desperate thoughts. He’d just have to convince himself that Soobin wasn’t gonna forget about him out of nowhere just because he had someone else to talk to these days.

They were best friends, after all.

-

“Yeonjun-ah, tell me, is there anyone special in your life?”

Yeonjun’s eyes blew open wide as the piece of food he had been about to swallow threatened to choke him. He stared at Soobin’s mom, who had just shifted the conversation from light everyday talk to Yeonjun’s love life as if it was a completely natural segway.

It was Friday, and Yeonjun had joined the Choi family for dinner like he sometimes did. He and Soobin had arrived together after school, and Yeonjun had helped Soobin’s mom with the cooking before they sat down by the dinner table together.

Having grown up as Soobin’s best friend, Yeonjun was more than comfortable with his parents, and he considered them his second pair of parents. Nowadays, he met with them more often than he did his own parents, although that had to do with them being closer, as his own parents had not moved with them all to Seoul when the two sons started university.

However, it had been almost a month since the last time he saw them now, having been caught up with school and work life for a while, which made him understand why she was curious. Still, when you were in love with your best friend – who was also the son of the questioner – it wasn’t the sort of question you wanted to hear.

“Mom!” Soobin hissed in embarrassment as he slapped Yeonjun’s back to alleviate his choking. “Why do you always have to bring that up?”

“Because I’m interested!” she answered, putting her cutlery down to lean her elbows on the table. She looked like a teenage girl ready to hear some gossip. “Yeonjun-ah hasn’t had a boyfriend in so long, I’m afraid he’ll end up alone.”

Finally, Yeonjun swallowed and was able to speak again. “First of all,” he said, pointing at her, “rude. I’m just 23, I won’t die alone. Second of all, Soobin’s almost my age too, and I don’t see you asking why he doesn’t have a girlfriend.”

Next to him, Soobin rolled his eyes at the same time as his mom opened her mouth to answer, only to be spoken over by her husband.

“Soobin would have had a girlfriend already if he hadn’t been so stubborn,” the man sitting opposite Soobin said, giving his son a pointed look.

“If not agreeing to let you set me up for mating with a stranger makes me stubborn, then okay, that’s exactly what I am,” Soobin answered sternly.

“Son, you’re of the right age to—”

“I’m 22, dad, I’m only barely an adult.”

“I was 19 when your mother and I met!”

“Yes, but those were different times, now it’s more common to find your partner later in life.”

Yeonjun and Soobin’s mom looked back and forth between the two alphas arguing. They shared a look where both conveyed that they were uncomfortable with the situation but had no idea how to stop them. 

“Then if you’re going to be so stubborn, tell me exactly what’s so wrong with finding your mate now?”

Soobin glanced at Yeonjun, a disgruntled look in his eyes. Yeonjun understood; he knew Soobin hated to fight with his dad, and he hated this topic.

“It—it’s not a good time for me,” Soobin answered after a few seconds of hesitation. He stared at his plate without moving to take another bite, as if he was afraid to look his dad in the eye suddenly. “You know, with school and all. I’d rather just wait until I’ve graduated.”

Yeonjun studied Soobin’s dad’s face as he contemplated Soobin’s words. His expression was not angry, more collected, and Yeonjun was glad that he at least was considering Soobin’s argument.

“I understand, Soobin-ah,” he said slowly, nodding. A surprised but satisfied look came upon Soobin’s face. “A mating ceremony takes time, and it’s better to have it after your graduation.”

Soobin and Yeonjun shared a confused look, both finding it weird that Soobin’s dad was giving up so easily.

It turned out that he wasn’t.

“Of course, finding your prospective mate and getting comfortable with her will take time as well. There is also a lot of preparations before the mating ceremony. It’s only 2 years left until you graduate, so you should ideally try to meet your future mate now.”

A growl escaped Soobin’s lips as he stared at his dad.

Yeonjun immediately noticed how that sound made the atmosphere shift, and a tense silence filled the air. Soobin and his dad were staring each other down, while Soobin’s mom looked like she was fighting against the need to throw up.

Her eyes flickered to Yeonjun. It wasn’t the first time she had conversed with him through her eyes only, and so he understood easily. Since he was the only one unaffected by the tension, the only human one, it was easier for him to stop the two alphas.

“Soobin,” he said, grabbing his best friend’s arm lightly. “Should we go to your room? I think we’re both finished with dinner.”

At first, Soobin didn’t respond, he just kept glaring at his father. When Yeonjun shook his arm and made a cute, pouty face at him, Soobin finally glanced down at him.

With a deep breath, Soobin nodded, and he let Yeonjun pull him out of his seat and all the way to his room on the second floor. After closing the door behind them, Yeonjun let out a sigh of relief as he and Soobin went to sit on his bed.

“Well,” Soobin said, “that was a shit show.”

Yeonjun nodded, sighing. “He’s being unfair, I don’t get how he doesn’t see it. Can’t your mom talk some sense into him?”

“I don’t know. I’d like to think she’s on my side, but she’s never said anything whenever he brings it up, so who knows?”

Yeonjun grabbed Soobin’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Let’s forget about that now. You wanna play something?”

-

Focusing on a game instead of talking about it helped them forget about the awkward tension at the dinner table. At first, they played in silence, until they noticed both of their friends being online.

Two minutes later, the four of them were in a three-way facetime call, conversation fully focused on the game they were all playing.

They had played for maybe thirty minutes when Soobin asked a question clearly aimed at Taehyun. “Do your parents ever try to set you up to get mated?”

The last game was finished, and they were in the in-between before starting a new game. Yeonjun watched as Taehyun sat his controller down and picked up the phone, giving them his full focus. “Pressure me, no. I mean, my mom asked me once if I’d like to get mated, and I said that one day I want to, but definitely not now. She said that was good because she wants me to be happy. Why?”

Yeonjun knew Soobin didn’t talk that much to Taehyun about this certain issue, knowing he felt ashamed by it. But Yeonjun didn’t understand why that would make Soobin feel shame, since it was not his fault his dad was being like that.

“My dad…” Soobin fiddled with his hands, looking down at them. “He’s kind of insisting I need to find a potential mate soon. He’s even sent me the contact info of several girls he finds fit to be my mate.”

“Really?” Kai asked. His face was a little less grim than Taehyun’s, probably due to seeing the whole mate thing from an outsider point of view. Kind of like Yeonjun did, probably. “Isn’t that like an arranged marriage?”

“Yeah, kind of like that, I guess,” Soobin muttered.

“Does he not know we’re in the 21st century?” Kai asked, flabbergasted.

Taehyun let out a sigh. “It’s not as outdated to mate for influence nowadays. Like, many parents see it like a duty for their kids to mate with someone they approve of, someone that could… give you good offspring, I suppose. And, well, the easiest way to find that someone is for the parents to choose them.”

Yeonjun eyed Soobin but didn’t say anything. Instead, Kai answered, “Well that’s fucked up.”

“I wish my parents were more like yours, Hyun-ah,” Soobin muttered, and he picked up the controller to have something to hold onto. Yeonjun wanted to grab his hands and hold them in both of his, to comfort him. He wanted to caress Soobin’s face, smooth out his frown lines and make him smile again.

Later, after the call had ended and the game had been paused for at least an hour, the two boys were lying on Soobin’s bed, staring up at the ceiling. They’d kept a light conversation going for a while, trying to forget about any problems they had for a moment.

After a long silence, which he had spent thinking about Soobin, of course, Yeonjun reached for his best friend’s hand once again. He locked their fingers easily, it being the most natural thing ever. Then he pushed himself onto his side, so he could watch Soobin’s face.

“Soobinnie,” he said, squeezing his hand. He waited for Soobin to meet his eyes. The view was so pretty, Soobin looking all soft and sleepy, glancing up at him. It made Yeonjun smile as he let his left hand scurry across Soobin’s chest. It ended up at Soobin’s nape, playing gently with his hair.

“You’re my baby,” he said in a hushed, gentle voice. “I’m your hyung. I’m not gonna let anyone mate my baby away to some stranger. Don’t worry.”

Soobin said nothing, but the way his eyes filled with something glossy told Yeonjun just what his words meant to the younger. He kept his eyes locked on Yeonjun’s, conveying all his emotions at once.

Yeonjun was so used to the feeling of wanting to kiss Soobin that he didn’t have to use much strength to fight it in that moment. He just knew that this was a perfect kiss moment, had he been brave enough to do so.

He wasn’t brave enough, but he also wasn’t a coward. Slowly, he shifted his body so he could reach up to kiss Soobin’s forehead. He let his lips linger for a moment, before he lay his head back down on the bed. In the next moment, Soobin tucked his head into Yeonjun’s neck, his nose against his pulse point.

They both melted into each other, arms moving to a more comfortable embrace. In a matter of minutes, both of them would be asleep.

Before Yeonjun slipped away to the dreamland, though, he heard – and felt – Soobin whispering the sweetest words to him.

“Love you, Hyung.”

He couldn’t help but answer, “love you too, baby.”

Chapter Text

If Yeonjun thought Beomgyu’s presence the previous week was too much, it was about to get worse. Suddenly, Beomgyu started joining them at lunch almost every day, making Yeonjun wonder if he didn’t have any other friends to hang out with. In the class they shared, he kept sitting next to Soobin, but Yeonjun swore each time he was sitting closer and closer. Almost every moment Yeonjun spent with Soobin in school, there was Beomgyu as well, because apparently the two shared several classes together.

Maybe, in another universe, Yeonjun could have been friends with Beomgyu. He was an easy-going guy, and maybe Yeonjun could admit that he was funny at times. But the way he was always by Soobin’s side bugged Yeonjun. The way he was constantly sitting as close to Soobin as he could, and the way he laughed at everything Soobin said, he hated it.

And of course, the way he was constantly, shamelessly, flirting with Soobin, ticked him off the most.

“Soobin you’re so smart, I could never figure that out myself.”

“There’s no way you aren’t working out, you look so fit, Soobin!”

“Oh my god, you look really good in this colour, why aren’t you wearing it every day?”

Ugh. Yeonjun wanted to puke.

One Wednesday evening, when Soobin came to pick up Yeonjun after work at the dance studio and they went to eat dinner together, Yeonjun decided to bring it up.

He hadn’t planned to do so, feeling a bit too awkward to ask Soobin what he felt about Beomgyu’s constant flirting, but when Soobin received a text from Beomgyu he couldn’t help bringing it up.

“He’s texting you a lot, don’t you think?”

“Huh?” Soobin looked up, immediately locking his phone and putting it down. “Beomgyu, you mean?”

“Yeah,” Yeonjun said in fake nonchalance, taking a fry from Soobin’s plate despite having an entire serving in front of himself. “Like, you see each other in school all day, does he really have that much to say to you?”

For a second, Soobin looked amused, before coughing and shrugging. “I mean, he’s mostly talking nonsense. But Hyung, you and I see each other all the time and we still text.”

“Yeah, I know, but… It’s different, isn’t it? You’ve known him, what, a few weeks?”

Soobin shrugged again. “I guess we just clicked, things like that happen, you know.” He grabbed a few fries for himself and threw them into his mouth, chewing on them slowly. Yeonjun’s eyes were on his mouth, unable to not find the way he stuffed his cheeks cute. When he was almost finished, Soobin added, “actually, I think Beomgyu is just—”

“Do you like him?” Yeonjun blurted out, suddenly not being able to stand hearing Soobin talk about Beomgyu and not know what the feelings behind it were.

“Like him?” Soobin’s eyebrows shot up. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I? He’s funny.”

“No, I… I mean, like,” Yeonjun cringed when he said it, hating that he had to spell it out for him, “romantically?”

“What?” Soobin looked surprised, but not in the usual way with his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. Yeonjun knew all of Soobin’s facial expressions, and this was not a completely genuine surprised one. He didn’t know why Soobin was faking it, though. “No, why’d you think that?”

Because you’re texting him all the time and you invite him to everything we do, and you never complain when he’s glued to you, and- “I don’t know… because he… I think he likes you.”

Soobin stared at him for two seconds before snorting. “Beomgyu doesn’t like me,” he said confidently, as if he was super sure of himself.

“He obviously does, he’s like flirting with you all the time.”

“Hyung,” Soobin said, shaking his head and looking at him as if he was telling him something obvious. Kind of like how you would look down on a kid when you tell them a simple fact. “I think I would know if Beomgyu liked me like that.”

Yeonjun had to look away, suddenly filled with a mixture between wanting to laugh and cry at the same time.

No, he thought sadly. I don’t think you would, Soobinnie.

-

One Wednesday, no different than any other, Yeonjun had some time to kill after his teacher ended his class half an hour early. Normally, he would make his way to the dance studio to get ready for his classes, but with the extra time on his hands he decided to give himself a quiet moment to relax.

With his earphones in, Yeonjun put on a calm tune and found a bench in the middle of the empty hallway, by the stairwell where in the busy hours hundreds of people would run by. In that moment, though, there was no one except Yeonjun.

He sat down on the bench and crossed his legs, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes. It wasn’t often he gave himself time to sit and just be, without having anything he needed to do. Even if it was for just half an hour, it was much needed time.

Between two songs, the sound of someone speaking piqued Yeonjun’s attention. He would have turned up his music to tune the voice out, if he hadn’t realized it was a voice he recognized. Without thinking, he lowered the volume of his music to hear clearer.

Looking behind himself and the bench, he realized the voice must be coming from the stairwell, but since he couldn’t see the owner of it, he must have been standing just at the top of the stairs on the other floor.

“I don’t know, I feel like I’m only gonna be third wheeling you like always.” Beomgyu’s voice sounded slightly whiney, a tone Yeonjun had begrudgingly become familiar with by now.

It was quiet for a second or two, before Beomgyu snorted. “You can say so, but last time you guys literally forgot I was there.”

Another pause, this one long enough for Yeonjun to wonder who it was Beomgyu was talking to. Judging by his tone, it must be a friend, someone he was quite comfortable with.

“Okay, okay, I’ll come. Anyway, you know what? Soon, maybe I won’t even have to third wheel you guys… yeah, there’s this alpha I’ve got my eyes on.”

Yeonjun sat up straight in his seat. He ripped his earphones out to be able to make sure he was hearing it correctly. 

Beomgyu’s voice was suddenly sugar sweet and light, sounding just the way you would expect someone with a crush to sound like. Yeonjun hated that he could recognize it.

“I know, but this isn’t just a regular crush. I swear, I’m gonna make him mine. I’ve got an entire plan and all. We’re just friends now, but it’s more than what we were a few weeks ago. I’m gonna use my omega charm to seduce him.” Beomgyu laughed at his own words. “Yeah, sure, I’ll tell you all the deets’ tonight. But… just… I can barely contain myself; I swear he’s so hot I don’t understand how he’s single.”

The thoughts were in a jumble inside Yeonjun’s mind after hearing all that. Distantly, he realized was feeling slightly nauseous.

In fear of getting caught eavesdropping, even though Beomgyu didn’t seem to come down the stairs, Yeonjun shoved his phone into his pocket and rapidly left his spot behind.

Yeonjun decided to walk to the studio with music – not the calm kind this time – blasting in his ears to keep his thoughts away. He didn’t feel like diving into what he had heard just yet, especially not when he knew he had two hours of classes to deal with afterwards. It was better to just shut his thoughts down and deal with it later, he decided.

Of course, delaying your problems never made them go away.

His classes passed splendidly, and his students didn’t seem to have even notice Yeonjun’s heart wasn’t fully in it today. He was glad for that, because he always felt guilty when he wasn’t able to give his best.

When he exited the building to catch the bus home, however, all the thoughts he tried to keep at bay came right back in. Beomgyu’s words echoed in his head.

It’s not just a regular crush.  

I’m gonna make him mine.

He knew Beomgyu was interested in Soobin, of course he did. Everyone and their mother could see that Beomgyu was flirting with Soobin, even if Soobin wouldn’t believe it. It’s just. He had never realized just how serious Beomgyu might be about the entire thing. He had kind of expected (more like hoped) that Beomgyu would lose interest the longer it went on with Soobin ignoring his advances, but now he wasn’t so sure about that. Judging by his words, it sounded like Beomgyu was prepared to do anything to win Soobin over.

I’m gonna use my omega charm to seduce him.

A shiver ran down Yeonjun’s spine at the same time as he felt a sob threatening to tear its way through his throat. The longer he walked, the worse he felt.

So, Beomgyu was an omega. Of course, he had to be the biologically perfect fit for Soobin in ways Yeonjun never could. And of course, Yeonjun hadn’t noticed it until Beomgyu stated the obvious outright. Suddenly, Beomgyu became a much bigger threat, and Yeonjun found himself crumbling, losing all hope. 

Walking down the street, the sky beautifully pink as the sun went down above him, Yeonjun couldn’t stop the tears from turning into a waterfall. All he could do was try to breathe and not scrunch up his face in agony like he wanted to. He was still in public, after all.

It was ridiculous. He felt ridiculous, crying when he hadn’t even lost Soobin yet. At the same time, he felt justified in his sadness.

It just… sucked so much, to realize that Beomgyu might actually have a shot. He wasn’t even sure anymore whether Soobin liked guys or not, but if he did then Beomgyu was the perfect option for him. He was an omega, and one who’s company Soobin seemed to enjoy immensely.

In his mind, Yeonjun saw images of Soobin’s face, the way it used to scrunch up whenever Beomgyu said a funny joke or when he did something stupid. Sure, Soobin had said he didn’t like Beomgyu like that, but did he truly know?

Yeonjun realized he was spiralling when he noticed he had not only walked past the bust stop he usually waited at, but also that he had continued walking in the wrong direction for at least ten minutes. He was now further away from home, while feeling like he didn’t know if he could take another minute of being alone with his thoughts.

His phone was in his hand, and he quickly pulled out the group chat he usually resorted to when he was feeling like this. It had been while since they had used it last, since they saw each other in school all the time, but that didn’t really matter. He knew they hadn’t shut off the notifications.

Jjunnie-hyungie

Do any of you have time to talk?

It took less than ten seconds before Kai answered, and for once Yeonjun was glad Kai was always glued to his phone.

Hyuka

I’m only playing video games, I have time

Jjunnie-hyungie

Would you mind coming to mine in a bit?

His words seemed to alert Kai.

Hyuka

What is it? Did something happen, Hyung?

With unsteady fingers, Yeonjun slowly typed out his message. Not long after he sent it, Taehyun answered too.

Jjunnie-hyungie

It’s nothing serious, just a regular breakdown

Tyunnie

I’m on my way. Kai, I can pick you up?

-

Yeonjun was grateful for his friends. They were more than he could have asked for. Despite his distressed state, he managed to get back home, where he found Taehyun and Kai already waiting for him outside the entrance.

“Yeonjunnie-Hyung,” Kai greeted him with a hug and a belly-rub.

“Hey guys,” he said, cringing when he heard his strained voice. Well, they already knew about his emotional state, so there was no reason to be embarrassed.

The two younger guys had worried looks on their faces, but they refrained from asking until they had entered Yeonjun’s apartment. Once they did, he was pulled into a group hug.

“I’ll put on some tea,” Taehyun said as they pulled away a minute later. Meanwhile, Kai dragged Yeonjun over to the couch. There, they sat down, and Kai immediately glued himself to Yeonjun’s side. In a normal situation he might have found it annoying, but in that moment, it filled him with warmth toward his friend.

No words were spoken until Taehyun came back with three cups of steaming tea and put them down in front of them. Then, as he sat down, Yeonjun could feel the two pairs of eyes on him. He sighed.

“Thanks for coming,” was the first thing he said, because he suddenly felt very ridiculous for making his friends come to his aid when the problem was so inconsequential.

“Hyung,” Taehyun said, giving him a kind smile. “We wouldn’t let you break down all by yourself.” Yeonjun laughed, although his heart still felt heavy. “Do you want to talk about it? What it was that made you sad?”

With his eyes focused on the cup in front of him, Yeonjun fiddled with his fingers. He still felt close to crying, so he had to tread lightly. “It’s stupid, really.”

He yelped when Kai pushed a pointed fingers into his side. “Stop that,” Kai said, frowning. “It’s not stupid if it made you sad. Don’t downplay your emotions.”

Yeonjun blinked in surprise at Kai, feeling awfully touched. His friend looked back at him with a serious expression, making sure Yeonjun understood his message.

“Well,” Yeonjun began, then, deciding that he should talk about it. “I, um, kind of overheard Beomgyu talking on the phone before at school.”

He reiterated the whole story, telling them about Beomgyu’s words and the way it had sparked panic in his chest at the thought of Beomgyu truly going after Soobin. When he was finished, he was close to tears, his throat clogging up and his heart aching inside his chest. He thought talking about it would make him feel better, but apparently it only made things worse. Who would have thought.

“Sorry for not telling you,” Taehyun said, a sympathetic and sad look on his face. “It didn’t cross my mind that you didn’t realize he’s an omega.”

Yeonjun wrung his hands around his still hot cup of tea. It burned, but not enough for him to care to let it go. “Don’t. It’s no one’s fault, I just… I don’t know. Soobin didn’t even tell me!”

“Is that weird?” Kai asked, glancing at Taehyun.

Yeonjun answered before Taehyun could. “Soobin usually acts as my translator whenever he realizes I can’t sense what they can. Like, when someone is releasing calming pheromones or when someone is really angry. Stuff like that.”

“Yeah, it’s a bit weird that Soobin said nothing,” Taehyun said with a frown on his face.

Yeonjun tried to not feel worse after hearing that. It wasn’t like Soobin had an obligation to tell Yeonjun what second gender someone had, or stuff like that, but he’d thought Soobin would have mentioned it at least once considering how much time he was spending with Beomgyu lately. Was he hiding it on purpose? To not make Yeonjun aware that something might be going on between them?

“So,” Tae said, breaking Yeonjun out of his spiralling thoughts, “it sounds a bit like Beomgyu is trying to court Soobin.”

“Maybe,” Yeonjun said with a shrug. Next to him, Kai squeezed his shoulder, causing Yeonjun to let out his worrying thoughts. “I know Soobin isn’t mine, and I have no right to say anything about who he likes or dates or whatever, but…” He heaved a sigh. “It hurts to think about it. What if he starts liking him back?”

“Hyung, we don’t even know if Soobin likes guys,” Kai reminded him.

“I mean, yeah, but who knows…” Yeonjun mumbled, staring down at his hands again. He used to be so certain that Soobin wasn’t interested in guys that way, but recently he’d started to doubt it.

“If Soobin doesn’t like guys, it doesn’t really help Yeonjunnie-hyung, though, does it?” Taehyun said gently. Which was definitely a good point, but also not one Yeonjun wanted to think about. Because, if the case was that Soobin did like guys, then Beomgyu might have a shot. A shot that he seemed very keen on taking, and soon. But, if Soobin didn’t like guys, then neither Beomgyu nor Yeonjun would ever have a shot.

Kai hummed in response. “I guess…”

“It also feels so freaking unfair,” Yeonjun sniffled, deciding he didn’t want to think any more about whether Soobin could possibly like guys or not. “Beomgyu’s an omega, so he has a biological advantage against me. Soobin might just like him because they are compatible.”

“You know it doesn’t work like that, Hyung,” Taehyun said, giving Yeonjun a pointed look. “Just because he’s an omega doesn’t mean Soobin’s gonna immediately be all over him. If that were the case, both me and Soobin would be mated long ago.”

Yeonjun supposed that was a fair point. Still, he wasn’t convinced. “Maybe it’s better for Soobin if he gets together with Beomgyu, anyways; then he’ll solve the problem with his parents about finding a mate…”

“Hey, now you’re being all stupid again!” Taehyun grabbed Yeonjun’s wrists and shook them until Yeonjun met his gaze. “You’ve been in love with Soobin how long? Seven years? And now you’re just going to give up because someone else is interested? Soobin has had people flirting with him before, and that didn’t make you this depressed about it.”

Defeated, Yeonjun leaned back in the sofa, pulling his hands out of the grip. “Yeah, but no one’s ever been this serious with Soobin before. Beomgyu really likes him.”

“Yeah, but you love him.” Taehyun raised his eyebrows at Kai. “Help me out here.”

“Tae’s right,” Kai filled in. “You shouldn’t just give up. Not until you know whether there is a chance Soobin might like you back or not.”

A snort escaped Yeonjun. “You say that as if you know he likes me.”

“He loves you.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Kai grimaced. “I don’t know if he likes you, but neither do you.”

Yeonjun rubbed at his nose, hating the feeling of drying snot and tear on his skin. They weren’t really getting anywhere with this conversation. They all knew there was nothing they could do to change the situation.

The conversation kind of trickled out after that, and once Taehyun and Kai were sure Yeonjun was feeling better they decided to head out.

“Just, don’t panic about it,” Taehyun said when pulling on his jacket. “But, you know. Maybe you should start to think about if you should make a move on Soobin yourself. You know you’re gonna hate yourself if you never even tried, and he ends up with someone else.”

Yeonjun only sighed, knowing Taehyun was right but unable to answer.

When he laid in bed that night, Beomgyu and Soobin and love confessions spun round and round in his head until his anxiety became too much.

-

Like usual, Yeonjun spent his next Wednesday evening teaching classes at his dance school. However, this week Soobin surprised him by showing up to the studio half an hour before Yeonjun’s first class was supposed to start.

Normally, outsiders who hadn’t paid for the class weren’t allowed to participate, but as Yeonjun’s best friend and previous dance student, no one cared to kick Soobin out whenever he wished to participate. He only ever showed up to Yeonjun’s classes anyways, so as long as Yeonjun was fine with it, it was no big deal.

And of course, Yeonjun was more than fine with it.

Even if he tried his best to give equal focus to all his students, Yeonjun’s eyes often trailed back to Soobin when he told them to copy his movements. Yeonjun had always found Soobin incredibly hot whenever he danced to his choreos, and he couldn’t help but wish it had only been the two of them in there so he could stare at Soobin and only Soobin all class.

But he was supposed to be a professional, so he had to snap himself out of it. It helped that almost every time he stared a bit too long at Soobin, one of his other students would cough (although probably not intentionally) and bring Yeonjun back to professionality.

Before he knew it, his classes had passed and all students except Soobin (if he could even be counted as a student) had left the hall.

“I loved the last choreo,” Soobin commented, panting slightly and wiping his face with his shirt, “but I had trouble keeping up. Do you always keep this tempo, or did you just want to torture me?”

Yeonjun snickered as he gathered all his things into his bag. “What, you think I’d push all my other students harder just to make you suffer a bit?” He gave Soobin a fake innocent look that Soobin was sure to look right through.

Soobin attempted to swat Yeonjun with his hand in retaliation, but Yeonjun saw it coming and jumped out of the way with a laugh. In response, Soobin rolled his eyes, but Yeonjun saw him fighting back a smile.

They ended up laughing together as they went out into the November air. 

Normally, Yeonjun would take the bus on his way home, but since none of them were in a rush they decided to walk together. It was cold, especially since both were more than just a little sweaty after hours of dancing.

“I don’t want to leave you alone,” Soobin said when Yeonjun had asked why Soobin wasn’t heading in his own direction, “they’re saying it’s not safe to walk the streets at night these days.”

“Right.” Yeonjun fought down a shiver. They didn’t speak much of the kidnappings that had been plaguing the news recently, the number of missing boys apparently up to six now. Each time Yeonjun thought about it he was reminded of his conversation with his mom, and he mostly wanted to forget about that.

He let out a short breath, shaking off any thoughts of his mom. “Will you protect me from the kidnappers then, you big scary alpha?” Yeonjun teased, nudging Soobin with his elbow.

Soobin let out a shaky breath that Yeonjun took as a laugh. “Yeah,” Soobin said, rolling his eyes and looking away from Yeonjun. It brought a bright laugh out of Yeonjun, at which Soobin snapped his head back in his direction. “What? Do you not think I can protect you?”

Yeonjun snorted, amused by the seriousness of Soobin’s tone. He leaned into Soobin’s side as they walked and lifted his hands to squeeze around Soobin’s biceps. “I know with these muscles, there’s nowhere safer than right here next to you.”

Narrowing his eyes, Soobin studied Yeonjun’s face. If Yeonjun didn’t know better, he’d suspect the redness on the alpha’s cheeks to be a sign of him being flustered and not just a reaction to the cold air around them.

With a quick laugh, Soobin pulled his arm out of Yeonjun’s grip. “I know you’re fucking with me.”

“Well,” Yeonjun shrugged, deciding to be sincere for once, “even if I am teasing you, you know it’s the truth. I will always feel the safest with you.”

Glancing sideways at Soobin, he saw a satisfied grin spread on his face, and a happy warmth grew in his chest.

A few minutes later, their conversation had moved on, the topic of kidnappings momentarily forgotten. By then, Yeonjun was starting to feel the cold seeping through his thin jacket. The weather hadn’t quite tipped over into winter yet, but this evening seemed like it might be the tipping point.

Soobin seemed to notice as well when Yeonjun’s teeth were starting to clatter as they conversed. He made them both stop as he started digging for something in his bag.

“Did you f-forget something?” Yeonjun asked, looking back to where they had come from. They had been walking for twenty minutes by then, and he didn’t really feel like going back.

“No,” Soobin said, and the next moment he pulled out a dark grey hoodie. “Here.”

Yeonjun frowned in confusion, before he realized what Soobin was doing. “Y-y-y-you’re giving it to m-me? Aren’t you c-cold too?”

Soobin shook his head. “My jacket’s thicker than yours.” He put the hoodie in Yeonjun’s arms. “Here, I don’t want you to get a cold.”

Trying to hide his smile, Yeonjun accepted the hoodie. The moment he put it on, he already felt warmer.

As they kept walking, they were too invested in their own conversation to notice the threat of rain in the air. Only when the first few drops hit them did they realize, and by then they only had moments before the sky opened.

In a matter of seconds, despite how they started running to the nearest bus stop, they were both completely drenched.

“Ah seriously?” Yeonjun cried out when they stopped under the cover, staring angrily up at the sky. He shook his arms to try and get some of the water out, but it was useless.

“The next bus doesn’t come for another 20 minutes,” Soobin grumbled, looking up at the screen in the bus stop. He started bouncing on the spot to keep warm.

“Just our luck,” Yeonjun muttered, also moving around to try and keep warm.

Since their only other option was to go out into the rain and walk, they couldn’t do anything but wait for the bus to arrive. When it finally did, Yeonjun swore he couldn’t feel his fingers any longer.

At least the bus was warm, and the ride wasn’t too long before Yeonjun’s stop came. Soobin had to ride for a bit longer and then change bus, so they ended up saying goodbye there. Yeonjun didn’t even look back as he got off the bus, as he had to sprint to avoid the worst of the rain and get inside his apartment building.

When he finally got back in his apartment, the first thing Yeonjun did was get out of his wet clothes and jump in the shower. The warm water burned his cold limbs, and it took several minutes for him to get warm enough for his comfort.

“I swear, if I get sick I’m gonna be so pissed,” he muttered after getting out of the shower, jumping into his warmest sweatpants and hoodie. He glanced at Soobin’s hoodie that he had hung up to dry with a pout, wishing he could have worn that one instead. But now that it had gotten wet, it probably wouldn’t even smell like Soobin any longer. Such a shame, really.

A while later, Yeonjun dived under the covers and snuggled up tightly in bed. He still felt remnants of the cold, even though he was sure his room wasn’t below average temperature.

He shivered in bed for quite some time before finally starting to feel himself slip off to sleep.

-

When Yeonjun woke up, he did so with a shiver worse than when he’d gone to sleep. His head felt like it was being bashed in, and his throat was dry and clogged up.

Groaning, he tried to pull himself out of bed. The moment he sat up, though, his headache only worsened, and he scrunched his face up as he waited for it to calm down.

When he glanced at the clock, he saw that he had slept through his alarm. It was past 9 already, and on his phone there were several texts from Taehyun, who had been waiting to pick him up for class.

With a dizzy head, Yeonjun typed up an answer to Taehyun, apologizing for standing him up. But he felt like he had a good excuse, as he was feeling like he was halfway to the grave right now.

Then, without much contemplation, Yeonjun punched in Soobin’s number and called him. He just hoped that Soobin would be fine, but that hope was squashed as soon as Soobin answered.

“Hello?” Soobin all but croaked, sounding just as hoarse as Yeonjun was feeling.

“Bin-ah,” Yeonjun greeted back, groaning as he felt the rashness in his throat. “I feel awful.”

“Mm, me too, Hyung.”

“Why did it have to start raining?” Yeonjun complained, and he was very aware that his voice sounded like a teenager going through puberty. “Now we’re both sick.”

“I’m so cold, Hyung,” Soobin mumbled. “And my head hurts.”

Yeonjun wished he could be there so he could nurse Soobin back to health. It was unfortunate that he himself needed the same treatment, otherwise he could have been by Soobin’s side right now. “Maybe you should go back to sleep, Bin-ah. Or try to get up and eat something warm.”

“N-no, I don’t think I can eat something right now.” Soobin sounded squeamish at the mention of food, and Yeonjun worried Soobin might be worse off than him if he also didn’t have an appetite. “I… I guess I’ll get back to sleep, I feel pretty groggy.”

“Okay, good.”

“Mm. Talk to you later, Hyung.”

As they ended the call, Yeonjun decided to lay back down in bed as well. While he wasn’t exactly tired, his body felt like it needed all the rest it could get. Once his head was back on the pillow and his eyes closed, it didn’t take long before he fell back into a slumber.

 -

Yeonjun did not feel any better when he woke up hours later. He didn’t want to know how long he’d been sleeping for, but his phone told him that it was past 3 in the afternoon.

There were some messages from his friends, mostly from Taehyun who was scolding him and Soobin for being out in the rain and getting sick together, at the same time that he was sending them home remedies and suggestions on how to ease their suffering.

It took him some time to pull himself together and get out of bed. When he did so, he took another shower, in which he mostly stood under the warm water, allowing it to seep into his cold bones. Afterwards, he felt minutely better.

His head was still beating as he made his way to his kitchen to grab something to eat, and his nose was completely stuffed. How miserable life could be when you couldn’t even breathe normally.

With Yeonjun moving in slow motion, the clock neared 5 pm before he finished eating. Just as he contemplated whether to jump back in bed or sit himself in front of the tv, his phone started ringing.

“Hey,” he answered with as much energy he could muster, happy that Soobin was calling him. “Are you doing any better now?”

“Hey Hyung.” Soobin still sounded stuffed, but the tang of zombieness from before had disappeared. For that, Yeonjun was glad. “I don’t know, I think I feel a bit better.”

“Good to hear,” Yeonjun said, just as an urge to sneeze took hold of him. “I can’t even remember last time I was sick; this is awful.”

“Yeah, I get that. Did you eat anything?”

Yeonjun hummed and told Soobin about his meal in as little words as he could. His throat was hurting the more he was speaking. When Soobin asked if he would be fine with missing his classes, Yeonjun explained that he could get notes from Changbin, so he was fine.

The course of their conversation shifted completely when Soobin suddenly let out a surprised “Oh!”, startling Yeonjun.

“What? Did something happen?” He had to force a cough down so he could focus on Soobin.

“Oh, no it’s just, I got a text from Beomgyu.”

Of course, Yeonjun couldn’t help but think bitterly. He tried to not sound too disgruntled when he answered, “Yeah? About what?”

“Um, he…” Yeonjun imagined Soobin’s concentrated face as he most likely was writing out his answer to Beomgyu at the same time as he was speaking. “He, uh… He offered to come over.”

“What? But you- you’re sick.”

“Yeah, I mean, he said he could help me out. Like, with food, and get me some medicine, you know?”

Beomgyu wanted to take care of Soobin, Yeonjun realised. Like, literally care for him when he was sick.

A wave of nausea ran through Yeonjun at that thought. He imagined Beomgyu dabbing Soobin’s face with a cloth, him placing his hand on Soobin’s forehead to feel for a fever. The way Soobin would have to look up at Beomgyu sitting above him. How Beomgyu was offering to do what Yeonjun couldn’t do in that moment.

“That’s good,” Yeonjun replied mindlessly, quickly adding, “Soobin I think I need to hang up, I feel really awful. Talk to you later?”

“Oh! Yes, of course, Hyung. Take care.”

Yeonjun hung up, feeling awful in a different way than what he told Soobin.

For an hour, he tried to get some more sleep, but he was failing miserably. It might have been because he had been asleep all day already, or it was because his mind was stressing too much over the thought of Beomgyu coming over to take care of Soobin when he was sick.

Who was he kidding, it was definitely because of the last fact.

A while later, he got tired of rolling around, plagued both by his thoughts and by the beating in his head, his stuffed nose and the ache in his throat. He grabbed his phone and called Tae and Kai on facetime.

Kai was the first to answer. “Oh, you don’t look that good, Hyung.”

“I don’t feel great,” he agreed, rubbing a hand over his eyes before meeting Kai’s gaze. “I feel like someone ran me over.”

“You know, I highly doubt that,” Kai said, and he started explaining the story of his old friend who was once run over by a motorcycle, who had come out of it with two broken arms and a scratched face. At the end of the story, which Yeonjun gladly listened to since he didn’t have the energy to talk, Taehyun joined the call.

“Uh, what are you guys talking about?” Tae asked.

“Ah, just Kai’s friend who he hasn’t seen in years but who broke both his arms when he got hit by a motorbike,” Yeonjun explained, straining his voice a little.

“And scratched his entire face,” Kai added, as if that was very important.

“Okay… that’s too bad for him, I guess. Hope he’s better today.”

“Oh, I’m sure he is. He’s an idol today, so I’m sure his face survived well enough.”

Yeonjun wanted to laugh at the randomness of the conversation, but the ache in his throat prevented him from letting out more than a nose exhale. At the same time, Taehyun had a quizzical look on his face, causing Kai to let out his characteristic barking laugh.

As the laughter died down nearly a minute later, Yeonjun let out a sigh as he remembered why he had called.

“Something on your mind, Hyung?” Taehyun asked, clearly having noticed his change in mood.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s stupid. You guys know how Soobin’s sick right now too?” Yeonjun asked. They both nodded. “I… I called Soobin a while ago, and apparently Beomgyu wanted to come over and, like, help him.”

“Help him?” Kai asked.

“You know, like take care of him. It’s kind of bugging me, you know?” I should be the one to take care of Soobin, he stopped himself from adding.

On his screen, Yeonjun saw Kai nod slowly, while Taehyun looked to have a thoughtful expression. “I guess he really is trying to court Soobin-hyung.” He ran a hand over his face, meeting Yeonjun’s eyes in the camera. “Although it wouldn’t really count unless he made it official, you know, by giving him a courting gift and asking if he’s allowed to continue.”

“So, courting is like… dating, but not really?” Kai asked, clearly not as used to lycan customs as Yeonjun was. Not that he knew all there was to know about courting either, but he was at least familiar with the concept.

“Well, yes and no,” Taehyun started explaining. “it’s like when an alpha or an omega takes interest in someone else and wants to catch their eye, so they ask to court the other to try and make them fall for them. It can be like giving them gifts or taking care of them in different ways. And if the other person does, like, reciprocate the feelings, then they decide to start dating.”

“Ah, okay,” Kai said, nodding understandingly. “So Beomgyu is like, doing that even if he hasn’t asked Soobin about it?”

“I would guess so, or I think we would have heard something about it.”

“But isn’t that wrong, then?” Kai continued asking. “Like, if the ‘rule’ is that you need to ask for permission, isn’t it disrespectful of him to not ask?”

“Maybe he’s building up to it, like preparing himself for the right moment to ask. I don’t really know, I haven’t courted anyone before.”

As his friends talked, Yeonjun felt his mood fall more and more with each passing second. “Ah,” was all he could muster to say.

“Still, it’s kind of rude to not ask for permission to court him,” Taehyun added, taking note of Yeonjun’s expression. “Anyways, I don’t think Soobin would accept if he had been asked.”

“No?” Kai asked, and both he and Yeonjun’s eyebrows shot up.

Tae sighed before answering. “Mm. When Hyung and I went to Beomgyu-hyung’s concert last weekend, he kind of made it clear to me that he’s not interested in Beomgyu like that. It was even why he invited me; because he didn’t want Beomgyu to think it was like a date.”

When Soobin had told Yeonjun that Beomgyu invited him to his concert, Yeonjun had been flabbergasted for many reasons. He had not even known Beomgyu was in a band, let alone one popular enough to hold concerts every so often. At first, he’d been worried it sounded like Beomgyu had asked Soobin out on a date, so when he heard that Taehyun would join them, his initial panic about the topic was slightly dampened.

“He said that? Really?” Yeonjun asked, feeling suddenly as if he had received a bolt of energy, or maybe a dash of hope, at Taehyun’s words.

“Yeah, really. So, I just hope Beomgyu will do this the right way and let Soobin have his say before he does anything.”

Yeonjun fully agreed.

-

Both he and Soobin had missed all classes the second half of the week, and so they were a bit behind. Not enough for it to be a big deal, though.

In his first class of Monday morning, being the one he shared with Soobin and – unfortunately – Beomgyu, Yeonjun’s mood was down at the bottom. It was not due to the fact that his teacher had started class by telling them of an upcoming assignment. It was because of Beomgyu’s presence.

The younger hadn’t done anything he didn’t usually do. He had arrived a minute before they started, skidding into his seat next to Soobin with a grin on his face and immediately starting to blabber on about his weekend and asking how Soobin was doing. He wasn’t even being as touchy as he could be sometimes.

But something had shifted since Yeonjun found out last week that Beomgyu was trying to actually court Soobin. It made it impossible for Yeonjun to tolerate him, let alone like him – not that he had ever liked him– and just the sight of him made Yeonjun annoyed out of his mind.

As they walked to the cafeteria that day, Yeonjun forced himself in between Soobin and Beomgyu, not wanting the other to be so close to Soobin. He had jumped into their conversation, but he made it seem like he was only talking to Soobin with the way he didn’t as much as glance Beomgyu’s way.

When they arrived at the table Kai and Tae were already position at, Yeonjun quickly his way into the seat next to Soobin, the one Beomgyu usually sat in. It forced the other to sit opposite him, in the seat next to Taehyun, instead.

He was sure his friends noticed his behaviour, but he didn’t really care. He didn’t want Beomgyu anywhere near Soobin any longer.

With Tae and Kai knowing the reason behind Yeonjun’s bad mood, they tried their best to keep the conversation light. Beomgyu was talkative as always, his mouth going on and on about something Yeonjun had no interest in whatsoever. Instead, he tried to keep a conversation alone with Soobin, but it proved hard with the way Beomgyu kept trying to get Soobin to join their conversation all the time.

Halfway through their lunch hour, after Yeonjun got up to get himself some water, he came back to Soobin and Beomgyu typing rapidly on their phones, sometimes glancing up at each other as if they were talking about some huge secret between just the two of them. His mood soured immediately, and he sat down heavily in his seat.

He started glaring incredulously at Soobin, trying to get him to notice him or at least look up from his phone for a second, but the younger didn’t seem to notice a thing. For a second, Yeonjun had the urge to grab the phone from his hand and turn it off.

What he did do, instead, was exclaim: “you know it’s rude to text in the presence of others.”

Soobin gave him a surprised look. When he noticed Yeonjun’s mad expression, he slowly put his phone down and glanced at Beomgyu. Seeing that only fuelled Yeonjun’s anger.

“What were you two talking about that you couldn’t say in front of all of us, huh?”

Soobin swallowed. “It’s nothing, really,” he said, voice low.

“Nothing? Then you wouldn’t mind sharing it with us, would you?” Taehyun gave Yeonjun a warning look, but Yeonjun ignored him. He knew he was being an asshole, but he was mad. No, it was more than just simple anger. He was hurt and he was jealous, and he was sad and he was- he didn’t even know what everything he was feeling was.

“What’s your problem?” Beomgyu asked, and when Yeonjun turned his head towards him he noticed the way Beomgyu had his fist on the table in front of him. “Why is that any of your business? When have you ever cared when one of us have used our phones before? You use your phone all the time!”

“That’s not the same thing,” Yeonjun spat back, his full focus on Beomgyu now. “It’s like you’re gossiping about us, with the way you’re being so secretive about it all.”

“Hyung, it’s not like that,” Soobin tried, grabbing at his arm to get his attention.

“Then what is it like?” Yeonjun snapped.

“Hyung, we were just talking.” Soobin looked almost regretful, with a pinch of fear if Yeonjun read his expression correctly. “Don’t- please don’t be mad, it really wasn’t about anything serious.”

Yeonjun never could stay mad at Soobin for long.

He glared at Beomgyu as he felt himself calm down. The younger was glaring back just as fiercely, but it seemed he too didn’t want to upset Soobin anymore by continuing to fight.

As he cooled down, he could feel the awkward tension around him. He knew he had acted irrationally, but he didn’t feel like apologizing.

Not wanting to deal with the tension for longer, he huffed out a, “whatever. I have to go to class.” And grabbed his stuff. He didn’t look back when he left the table.

-

The next day, Yeonjun nearly bailed on their weekly hangout just because he didn’t want to see Beomgyu again. When he mentioned it to Kai, however, the youngest reprimanded him and told him he was being childish. Being the oldest and getting called childish by the youngest in their friend group always riled Yeonjun up, and Kai knew that. Like all the other times he had used that tactic, it worked, and Yeonjun came to meet them at the arcade after school.

After the first hour, during which Yeonjun kept glaring at Beomgyu and wished he could get the other kicked out somehow, Yeonjun had found a new way to deal with his Beomgyu problem. Suddenly, he was enjoying himself immensely.

“Hey! You’re doing that on purpose!” Beomgyu cried as his character got killed when Yeonjun ‘accidentally’ pushed him out into the enemies’ view. They were playing a shooting game in which they were supposed to work together to take the enemies down, but Yeonjun didn’t really care about that end goal.

He had found out that Beomgyu was a really sore loser, which made it incredibly fun for him to sabotage Beomgyu in whatever way he could.

“I don’t want to play with you again,” Beomgyu said, throwing his controller down and jumping out of his seat. He pouted and crossed his arms over his chest, going to stand next to Kai.

Taehyun took the seat next to Yeonjun, joining him in the game. “I know what you’re doing,” he said in a low voice as he grabbed the controller.

“I’m not doing anything,” Yeonjun said, feigning innocence.

Taehyun just shook his head at him. They started the game, and over the shooting sound Yeonjun knew the others wouldn’t hear them talking.

“You know, you’re being a bit mean.”

“I know,” Yeonjun said. Normally it would make him feel bad, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care when it came to Beomgyu. He was long past that by now. “It’s kind of the point.”

“Just don’t do anything too mean,” Taehyun warned. Yeonjun just rolled his eyes and focused on the game before him.

-

Yeonjun kept sabotaging and cheating to make Beomgyu lose. He managed to rile him up so much that at the end of the night, Beomgyu finally reached the tipping point.

Yeonjun scared him as he was playing the claw machine, causing him to miss the plushie he was aiming for. He had been so focused that Yeonjun’s scare made him scream, and after that the look on his face was one of pure anger.

“You asshole!” he said, pushing Yeonjun away with both arms. “I know exactly what you’re doing!”

 Yeonjun took a step back, straightening himself so he would tower over Beomgyu. “Yeah? And what exactly do you think I’m trying to do?”

“Hyung, stop,” Soobin said, stepping up next to Yeonjun who just swatted his hand away.

“You’re trying to rile me up by sabotaging me the entire evening. Well, you know what, it’s not working. It just shows how pathetic you are to put so much effort into bothering me.”

“I’m pathetic?” Yeonjun gaped. “Who are you to talk, you clingy ass, brainless-“

“Hyung!” Soobin cut Yeonjun off by dragging him back, coming to stand in front of him. He was looking at Yeonjun as if he couldn’t believe his ears. “Stop! Why are you being like this?”

“I’m not being like anything,” Yeonjun snarled, his eyes still glaring at Beomgyu over Soobin’s shoulder.

“You’re being a piece of shit!” Beomgyu countered. He took a step forward, only to be stopped by Taehyun coming to grab his arm.

Without knowing what it was he wanted to do, Yeonjun tried to step around Soobin. He didn’t exactly want to start a real fight, he was just too angry to allow Beomgyu to have the last word like that.

Before he could do anything else, though, Soobin put his hands on both sides of Yeonjun’s face, forcing him to meet his eyes. “Hyung. Will you please stop?”

Yeonjun deflated when he saw the disappointment in Soobin’s eyes. He suddenly felt incredibly small and stupid, and all he wanted was to run away and hide.

When Soobin saw the fight disappear from Yeonjun’s eyes, he seemed satisfied. He removed his hands but kept one of them touching Yeonjun’s arms as if to keep him in check.

“I’m taking Hyung home,” Soobin said, turning to tell the others. Yeonjun kept his eyes down in shame, so he didn’t notice the way Taehyun nodded. 

Soobin grabbed both of their jackets, seeing as it was quite cold outside now, and pulled Yeonjun with him. They were both quiet on the way out, and Yeonjun could tell Soobin was unhappy with him.

When they had walked in silence for a couple of minutes, Yeonjun finally dared to speak. “Soobin I-“

“That was really immature of you.”

He could hear the tension in Soobin’s voice, and the shame threatened to crush him. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I did that.”

“You were like that yesterday too. Did Beomgyu do something to you?”

That was the worst part. He couldn’t explain to Soobin why he was acting like that, because Beomgyu hadn’t done anything, not really.

“It’s complicated,” he said.

Soobin stopped walking, and Yeonjun turned around to look at him a step behind. “Hyung. It’s not like you to be mean to someone on purpose. I know you’re not like that. Can’t you just tell me what’s going on, and maybe we can solve this?”

“I... I don’t know, really. Me and Beomgyu just don’t really get along.”

Soobin frowned at him. “It can’t just be that.”

“I’m sorry,” Yeonjun said, hugging himself with his arms. He hoped Soobin would just drop it, because he couldn’t tell him the real reason. He just couldn’t. “Sorry I ruined the evening.”

Soobin stared at him with thoughtful eyes for several long seconds. Then he sighed and stepped up next to Yeonjun, wrapping an arm around his waist. “I think it’s Beomgyu you should apologize to, not me.”

“Still, I’m sorry. I… I’ll apologize to him tomorrow.”

Yeonjun sighed in relief when Soobin’s dimpled smile appeared. “Sounds good. Now, let’s go home to yours and watch something?”

-

The entire next morning, Yeonjun had tried to come up with what to say when he had to apologize to Beomgyu. He knew he had been an asshole for no reason, so he guessed that the younger wouldn’t take a simple ‘I’m sorry’ and leave it at that. And he knew he was bad at improvising on the spot, so his best shot was to come up with something beforehand and go with that.

After his morning classes, Yeonjun turned up to their lunch table, only to find that Beomgyu was nowhere to be seen.

"Wait, where’s Beomgyu?” he asked as he sat down next to Kai.

“Maybe you scared him away,” Kai said, his tone a bit disapproving.

Yeonjun opened his mouth – to say what, he didn’t really know, perhaps to apologize – when Soobin sat down in the seat opposite him and said, “Beomgyu texted me, he’s at home.”

“Oh. Is he sick?” Yeonjun wondered.

“No, his heat came,” he said before grabbing a mouthful and starting to chew.

His heat?

“Oh, was that why he was so upset yesterday?” Taehyun asked with interest, looking to Soobin.

“I don’t know. It’s not like he didn’t have a reason to be upset,” Soobin answered once he had finished chewing, his eyes finding Yeonjun.

“I was about to apologize, you know.”

“Well, Beomgyu’s gonna be home the rest of the week, so maybe you should send him a text instead.”

Yeonjun nodded slowly, figuring Soobin was right. He pulled out his phone, only to realize something. “Uh, I don’t have his number.”

“It’s in the group chat,” Taehyun said, reminding him. “You know, the one you never write anything in.”

Oh, right. The group chat Yeonjun had turned off the notifications on after one spam session from Beomgyu weeks ago. “Right, I forgot about that.” He smiled sheepishly at Taehyun. “Thanks.”

After he found Beomgyu’s number, he spent the remainder of the lunch break to write out an apology to him. It was harder than he expected, even with how much he had prepared during the morning.

In the end, what he sent was,

Yeonjun

Hey, it’s Yeonjun. I heard you were on your heat and that you won’t come to school in a while. So, I just wanted to say sorry for yesterday. I was being and ass and you didn’t deserve that.

He hoped that would be good enough.

-

Beomgyu never replied to Yeonjun’s message. Still, the next time they saw each other, after Beomgyu’s heat had passed, there seemed to be no bad blood left between them. Or, at least not more than there had been before last week’s incidents.

Of course, Yeonjun still didn’t like him. However, after realizing how his behaviour had affected the rest of his friends, Yeonjun tried to be on his best behaviour around Beomgyu. Which meant he ignored the other’s presence most of the time.

Weeks passed and they entered December. Soobin’s birthday came and went, and even though Beomgyu had been a big player in the celebration, Yeonjun hadn’t minded because he could tell that Soobin had been happy, and that was what mattered the most to him.

The days were passing by quickly as they moved closer to Christmas vacation, albeit also closer to their exam season. In the last few weeks of the term, their studies overtook them, and Yeonjun spent most of his free time either in the library, on the floor of his apartment or at Soobin’s house. He wasn’t very good at focusing on anything else while stressed, so he was thankful that his friends planned their study sessions for him. Otherwise, he would probably have been holed up in his apartment, not speaking to a soul until his last exam had passed.

Being civil around Beomgyu proved easier than he expected. As they were all quite busy with studying, he noticed that Beomgyu’s flirting and clinginess around Soobin had been toned down significantly. He assumed it was because of their studies, but he also wondered whether Soobin had said something to Beomgyu. The younger didn’t look heartbroken or even slightly sad, though, so Yeonjun didn’t think that was the case.

Having several exams closing in on him, Yeonjun was too stressed to think of much else. He also had to work and teach his classes, but it all passed so quickly he barely noticed. He even missed several calls from his mother; being too tired to call back, he just texted her that he was indeed planning to go back home for Christmas.

Before he knew it, Yeonjun’s last exam came and went, and suddenly he was free. Well, for two weeks, but that was still a blessing. His mind felt like it had been run through a cheese grater, and he could barely register that he was allowed some rest.

He was supposed to leave for his hometown the day after his last exam, and so, the five friends spent the evening that Wednesday together, celebrating and chilling. There was a relaxed smile on Yeonjun’s face the entire evening, and not even Beomgyu being annoying could deflate his good mood.

Soobin accompanied Yeonjun back to his apartment when the evening ended, and Yeonjun was glad to have him stay over. Even though Yeonjun was only to be gone for a week, they wanted to spend the most of their last time together.

In the morning, Soobin sat on Yeonjun’s bed watching him pack his bag. “Are you okay with going back to your parents?” he asked gingerly.

Yeonjun shrugged. “It’s fine. It’ll be a little awkward, most likely. Mom’s probably a bit upset that I disregarded her worry about the kidnappings going on, but she’s often upset with me so it’s fine. And dad will probably be at work most of the time, anyways.”

Soobin nodded, knowing all about Yeonjun’s family struggles. “Well, at least it’s only for a week this time.”

Yeonjun hummed, throwing a pair of sweatpants in his bag. Previously, his mom had forced him to stay the whole vacation period at home, saying that he had to appreciate the time he had to see his family. But Yeonjun, well. Nowadays, he didn’t feel bad admitting he had a better time staying in Seoul than going back home.

“What about you?” he asked a few minutes later, after sipping up his bag and moving towards the kitchen. Soobin followed him and watched as he turned on a kettle of water. “Do you think your dad will keep pestering you about mating?”

“I’m sure he will. I just hope mom will help me talk him down, it’s not exactly festive to fight during Christmas times.”

“Just call me if it gets too much, okay?” Yeonjun said, giving a sympathetic smile.

“I will.”

Before any of them could say anything else, the sound of both their phones notifying them of a message distracted them.

Yeonjun grabbed his phone and saw it was a text from Beomgyu in their group chat. The one he had begrudgingly turned the notifications back on after his friends complaining about him being out of the loop.

The Beoms

Hey im bored does anyone want to hang out

Yeonjun watched Soobin read the message, wondering what he was thinking. Would he answer, saying that he was with Yeonjun? Or would he agree to see Beomgyu, after Yeonjun had left? Yeonjun wished he wouldn’t answer at all, the mere thought of Soobin going to hang out with Beomgyu once he was gone making his stomach rumble with jealousy. 

Kai was fast to answer that he was busy with family stuff. Still, Soobin hadn’t answered. Then came Tae’s answer,

Tyun

Sure, why not

A knowing smile spread on Soobin’s face as he locked his phone. Yeonjun wondered what that was about.

“Are you going to meet up with them?” he couldn’t help asking.

“No, I’ll come with you to the station, then I think I’ll just go home and chill.”

Yeonjun tried to hide his smile by tending to the kettle, pouring the water into two teacups. “So you’ll let Taehyun handle Beomgyu on his own? Those two are a bit of a strange combination don’t you think?”

Soobin chuckled. “Nah, I think Taehyun can handle him just fine.”

-

They spent the last hour chilling on Yeonjun’s couch before it was time to leave. They walked all the way to the station together, Soobin carrying Yeonjun’s bag like a gentleman. It was cold outside, being late December, and Yeonjun already missed his bed.

They arrived with only a short time to spare before Yeonjun’s train departed.

“Maybe you should get on, Hyung,” Soobin suggested, not wanting Yeonjun to miss his train.

Yeonjun looked at the train, then back at Soobin. It felt like he was already missing him, and part of him felt like just ignoring the train and staying with Soobin over Christmas. It would be so easy, to just let the train go and ignore his parents’ complaints. To go back to his apartment and spend all his free time with Soobin and the other guys. Most definitely, he would be much happier if he did so.

But he would feel too much like a bastard and a terrible son if he did that. It would only be a week until he would get to see Soobin again, surely he would survive that.

“I know,” he sighed. “I just don’t want to go.”

Soobin seemed to feel the same way. Still, like always, he was the voice of reason. “It’s only seven days, it’ll go by fast. And we’ll talk on the phone every day, right?”

“Of course.” Yeonjun grinned and went to grab his bag from Soobin’s grasp. “I’ll go now, then.”

They shared a long embrace. He felt Soobin nuzzling his neck, no doubt sucking in his scent as if he was scared he would forget it during the upcoming week.

“Call me when you get home?” Soobin asked as they let go.

Yeonjun took slow, reluctant steps back towards the train. “I will. See you, Soobin-ah.”

“See you, Hyung.”

With a last, sad wave of his hand to his best friend, Yeonjun got on the train. As he walked through the compartments, he looked out the window at where Soobin was still standing.

Soobin saw him, having watched him go. They shared a last, longing smile before Yeonjun had to continue, going farther into the train to find a seat. He wondered if Soobin had left, or if he waited, watching the train until it was out of sight.

-

The train wasn’t really that crowded when Yeonjun got on, so he found himself an empty compartment and planted his butt in a seat by the window. He put his bag underneath the table in front of him and leaned his head back on the head rest. The ride was a few hours, so he might as well get comfortable.

Half an hour later was the next stop, and after that the train filled up with more people, so by then Yeonjun was no longer alone in his compartment. After an hour, the compartment was full, and an older man was sitting in the seat next to him. Yeonjun smiled awkwardly at him when he sat down, trying to make himself smaller to give space for the man.

Yeonjun found himself becoming incredibly awkward sitting next to the old man, who was looking out the window, and would sometimes lock eyes with Yeonjun and smile, almost as if he was trying to communicate with Yeonjun. Yeonjun smiled back, and then retreated his eyes to the window. A few minutes later, the man asked him in very few words (which Yeonjun only barely caught with his music in his ears) to help him connect his charger to the wall next to Yeonjun. He realized the man’s Korean was poor and felt a rush of sympathy for the man.

For a while, Yeonjun sat stiffly in his seat, as if he was expecting the man to move or talk to him or do anything that required Yeonjun to react. Yeonjun knew he was overreacting and being awkward for no damn reason, because the man had been sitting still in silence for well over an hour. Still, he couldn’t really help it. He just didn’t know how to behave around some people, and this man was one of them.

When there was half an hour left of his trip, Yeonjun noticed the man taking out a packet of gum and plopping one into his mouth. He met eyes with the man, unfortunately, and then the man held the packet out, offering him some. Yeonjun, in his surprise, held out his hand and said a stilted “thank you” as the man poured out not one but three pieces of gum into Yeonjun’s hand.

Why was he so awkward? Yeonjun cringed hard as he bowed his head to the man and put all three pieces into his mouth at the same time, because maybe that was what the man expected him to do? He didn’t really know, but at least he thought it was kind of the man to offer some of his gum to a total stranger. Even if it was strange as well.

There was an odd taste to the gum that Yeonjun didn’t recognize. A bitter type of flavour that he couldn’t put a name on. It was quite weird, actually, and he couldn’t say he enjoyed it. Still, he felt it would be rude of him to spit it out (and he didn’t know if he could manage to do it secretly without the man noticing, because he was looking out the window and would definitely notice everything Yeonjun was doing), so he kept on chewing. The taste got even worse with time, as the minty flavour slowly disappeared and the bitter one lingered. He started wishing the train would speed up so he could spit out the gum and get rid of the taste.

As they neared the last stop, Yeonjun found himself getting sleepy, but he didn’t think much of it. However, once the train stopped and he stood from his seat, bending down to grab his bag, he found his head spinning too much, and his vision going blurry. He frowned, blinking rapidly to try and get his eyes to work again.

Maybe I’ve got iron deficiency or something, he thought, remembering previous instances where he’d been dizzy from standing up too fast.

He managed to get a hold of his bag, and noticed the man that sat next to him was still standing in the compartment, looking at him. At first, Yeonjun thought it was weird, but he saw the man had a worried look and guessed he had seen Yeonjun’s stumbling and wanted to help him. He smiled at the man, wanting to tell him he was fine and didn’t need any help, but when he took another step he swayed again. His vision narrowed and his senses numbed, almost as if he was drunk.

Okay, maybe it wasn’t iron deficiency.

After another step forward, the man spoke to him. “You help need?”

Despite his bad Korean, his message was clear: Do you need my help?

Yes, Yeonjun wanted to say, but he found he couldn’t control his mouth, couldn’t form any words. He tried nodding, instead, but couldn’t tell if he succeeded or not. He started to lose sense of his body, almost as if his mind was passing out while his body stayed upright.

What the fuck was going on?

The old man grabbed a hold of Yeonjun’s elbow and led him out of the train, his grip going around Yeonjun’s waist firmly when they had to walk down the stairs. Yeonjun had a brief thought that their roles had been switched, with the old man being the one to help him walk and not the other way around.

When he was outside, Yeonjun’s first thought was that he should sit down and call Soobin. Not that he knew how Soobin could help him, but he had promised to call. Or maybe his parents were a better choice right now, so that they could come pick him up.

But the man kept walking, leading Yeonjun further away from the train as if he had a goal in mind. Was he taking Yeonjun to someone who could help? Maybe he was offering to give him a ride home, since in his current stage he wasn’t really capable of doing much on his own.

The longer they walked for, the less safe Yeonjun felt. He tried to tell the man to stop, that he didn’t need his help any longer, but couldn’t. It was at this point that he realized he was being led away by this man and he couldn’t do anything to stop it. His arms were too heavy to move, and his legs were going forward against his own will. Why couldn’t he do anything?

After two very long minutes of Yeonjun freaking out, he saw a black van parked at the end of the street. When he looked at the man’s face, he understood that the van was his destination.

Now more than before, Yeonjun tried to squirm his way out of the old man’s grip. But it was much stronger than he expected, and with his little control over his muscles he couldn’t even slip a centimetre out of the firm hold. His mind was becoming foggier with every passing minute as well.

A terrifying feeling of acceptance washed over him. There was nothing he could do, he realized. Still, he tried. For every step they took towards that van, Yeonjun tried to fight against the constraints of his own body. He even tried to pull out his phone, but ended up dropping it and leaving it behind as the old man dragged him forward.

Sooner than he wished, they reached the van. One word, spoken by the old man in a language foreign to Yeonjun, caused the doors on the van to open.

A man, probably in his late thirties, jumped out of the van and suddenly stood right in front of Yeonjun. He had black eyes and short, buzz cut hair, and on his face was a gleeful expression.

“Perfect,” he said when he scanned Yeonjun up and down.

Yeonjun wanted to spit on him, but he could barely keep his head up to look at him.

The man said a few words to the older man still holding Yeonjun, and suddenly he felt the grip on his waist disappear. Immediately, Yeonjun’s knees buckled, and he fell forward. There was barely any energy left in him, so getting back to his feet was a challenge.

Suddenly, a third man appeared from behind the car. In his hands was a big bucket. It looked like he was struggling to lift it; clearly, it was filled with something heavy.

What that something was, Yeonjun found out a second later.

The content of the bucket was poured over his head, instantly drenching him from top to toe. He felt like he was going to throw up as the reeking smell of perfume invaded his nose. It was incredibly strong, and it was everywhere. If Yeonjun was dizzy before, he nearly passed out at this point.

The man grabbed Yeonjun roughly and all but threw him through the van’s side door, forcing him to lay on his side in the backseat. He struggled to get into a sitting position, but he was too slow, so the man – who had gotten into the seat next to him – grabbed his shirt and pulled him upwards.

Words were spoken around him, but they didn’t sink in far enough for Yeonjun to register their meaning. He could barely breathe through the stench of perfume, and his body was shivering cold despite being inside the car.

At some point, the engine was started. They didn’t bother to put a seatbelt on him.

-

Chapter Text

Yeonjun didn’t register that he passed out until he opened his eyes to find himself in a room filled in darkness. The first couple of minutes were disorienting, and at first Yeonjun couldn’t recollect what had happened or why he was there. Then, as if someone had flipped a switch in his mind, he remembered.

Fear blossomed in the pit of his stomach as he remembered the feeling of being out of control of his own body. He understood now what must have happened; he had been drugged. Was it the gum he got from the old man? It had to have been, and he was so stupid to have fallen for it.

He sat up slowly, his entire body aching with every movement. He’d been lying on the cold, hard floor, which was not exactly spectacular for his back. But at least he could move again. While his head was still a bit foggy, he felt like the worst of the drug’s effect on him had worn off.

Slowly, he moved to stand up, keeping his hand to the wall he found he’d been sleeping next to. Once he stood, he tried to take in his surroundings, only to realize it was too dark to make out much. He could tell he was in a small, square room made of concrete. As he walked around, he realized there was very little furniture in there; the only things were a bed without a mattress and a table at the opposite wall. That was it.

Yeonjun sat down on the bed, putting his head in his hands.

Fuck. This was not good. This was sooo not good, he didn’t know how to not freak out. What was he supposed to do? Call for help? He was sure the people who put him here knew there was no way of him escaping, or they wouldn’t have left him there alone.

His mom’s words from a month ago came back to him. Her warnings about him staying safe, because human guys his age were disappearing. He hadn’t thought it applied to him because it had felt so distant. Crimes always happened all around them, and they maybe heard a few words here and there about it, but he rarely felt it affected his life much.

But now, here he was. Kidnapped.

It hit him like a slap to the face when he remembered that, so far, none of the missing people had been found.

Oh God, he thought. I’m so fucked.

In the middle of his freaking out, a loud sound from somewhere he couldn’t pinpoint startled him so much he jumped to his feet. It was the sound of a door opening, followed by light that illuminated the corridor just outside his room.

There was a barred door in one of the corners that Yeonjun hadn’t noticed before. Now in the light, Yeonjun could make out the room, and found it looked rather like a small office room, except for the door. Perhaps it had been replaced with this metal one to make the room suitable as a cell.

Behind the barred door Yeonjun could see a similar one, leading to another cell opposite his. He stepped closer, tempted to put his hands around the bars and peep out, but the sound of footsteps entering the corridor stopped him from moving further.

The footsteps belonged to at least two people, maybe three, Yeonjun calculated. The sounds were growing louder, meaning they were coming his way.

He was curious, but also scared out of his mind. His blood felt like lava burning in his veins, threatening him closer to a panic attack. He stood frozen where he was, his eyes wide open, waiting for the people to pass by his cage so he could get a glimpse of what was going on here.

It took them only seconds before they reached his cell, and they quickly passed by him without as much as looking his way. But Yeonjun had had enough time to study them.

There were indeed three people. Two of them wore white coats, similar to the lab coats they used in his labs in school, and blue latex gloves covered their hands. The two were leading the third person in between them, and the third was not clad in the same attire. He seemed to be walking with some difficulty, his head hanging forward against his chest.

Just before they passed, the middle guy’s head turned just slightly to the left, and he and Yeonjun locked eyes. Yeonjun was shocked by the look on the other’s face; he looked utterly exhausted, bags under his eyes, cheeks sunken, but when he noticed Yeonjun his eyes came alive with interest.

Yeonjun jumped when he heard the sound of keys rattling in a lock, and realized they were opening what had to be a cage just next to his. At this, he ran forward, pressing his face against the bars in the door to try and get a glimpse of what was going on. He heard the guy being thrown inside, and then the loud slam as the door was shut and locked again.

Fury washed over him when he saw the indifferent manner of the two men in lab coats.

“Hey! What the fuck are you doing?” he yelled, wanting to catch their attention. “Hey!” he rattled the bars when they didn’t even react. They turned from the door once it was locked and kept on going down the corridor, away from Yeonjun. “Let me out! You can’t keep us here, why are you doing this?”

The men just continued walking, acting like nothing was out of the ordinary. Yeonjun couldn’t see them any longer, but he heard their footsteps continue until they seemed to reach the end. Another door was opened, and the footsteps disappeared behind it as it closed.

Ten silent seconds passed, and then the light disappeared.

Yeonjun hissed in frustration and turned to lean his back against the bar, grabbing his hair in frustration.

“Hey, new guy?”

Yeonjun lifted his head, eyes widening when he saw a face peaking in at him through a small hole in the wall to his right. It was the same guy who he’d just locked eyes with. He hadn’t noticed the hole before, but then again, he hadn’t seen the door before the light came on either. It must’ve been an old ventilation hole that someone had removed, at some point.

“I know you’re, like, scared and shocked and overwhelmed and all,” the guys said, and Yeonjun took a step closer to try and get a better look at him in the dark, “but it’s kinda nice to see someone with some fight left in them.”

Yeonjun snorted lightly. He swore he could see a tired smile on the other’s face.

“I’m Juyeon,” he continued. “Nice to meet you.”

“Yeonjun. I’d say nice to meet you too, but this situation is not exactly nice, so…”

“Yeah, well, you get used to it.”

Fuck, Yeonjun thought. How long has this guy been here?

“Juyeon?” another voice from one of the cages on the opposite side called, this one a lighter male voice. It sounded weaker than Juyeon’s like this person didn’t have as much strength left. “Who’s the new guy?”

Juyeon’s head faced away as he answered, raising his voice a little. “Says his name is Yeonjun. Didn’t know you were awake, Chanhee-yah.”

“The yelling woke me up.”

Yeonjun had turned around to look out of his cage, trying to find where the new person – Chanhee, apparently – were located. All he saw was darkness.

“Sorry about that,” Yeonjun said into the void.

“Don’t be, Chanhee sleeps too much anyways,” Juyeon says, and Yeonjun appreciated the playfulness of his voice.

“You say that as if there is that much else to do around here,” Chanhee replied grumpily.

While it was kind of heartwarming the way the two of them were bickering like old friends, Yeonjun was still kind of freaking out. He needed some answers so that he could calm himself and try to gather his thoughts. “Sorry, but would you guys mind telling me what this place is?”

“Ah, yes, sorry,” Juyeon said with a laugh. “Forgot for a moment that you’re new. They haven’t brought someone in for a while now.”

“You might wanna sit down,” Chanhee told him, and suddenly Yeonjun saw him appear at the door to the cage just opposite his. Even in the dark, Yeonjun saw the delicate features of his face. However, he looked like the ghost of what he should look like, his face hollow and drenched of colour, dark bags underlining his eyes, long hair hanging limply around his face. “It’s gonna be a lot to take in.”

Yeonjun did sit down, uncomfortably, so that he was sitting facing the wall where Juyeon was peeking down at him, while still able to turn his head towards Chanhee if he wanted.

“Okay, so first I wanna know, have they been talking about us in the news?” Juyeon asked.

Yeonjun hummed, thinking about it. He wasn’t exactly the kind of person to watch the news carefully, but there had been talk about it here and there in school so that even he had not missed it. “I think there was a lot of news coverage a while ago. Like, they talked a lot about people disappearing, that it was only human guys around the same age, but after a while when the police still didn’t find any leads, it got dialled down a lot. But, well, I guess it was about this place, am I right?”

“It gotta be,” Juyeon said, sounding thoughtful. “With you, we’re ten guys in here right now.”

“Ten? I only heard about 6.”

“Yeah, then it’s like you said, they’re keeping it quiet because they’re getting nowhere,” Chanhee said with a loud sigh. “I told you the police would be useless, Juyeon.”

Juyeon cursed, and Yeonjun wondered if maybe he shouldn’t have said anything. “Thanks, Chanhee, that makes me feel so much better.”

“I’m just being realistic.”

“Does it kill you to keep your realistic thoughts to yourself? I’m trying to hold onto hope here.”

Yeonjun could tell Chanhee was about to bicker back and spoke up to stop them. “So, uh, you said we are ten in here? Where’s everyone else?”

“Everyone’s here, right Chanhee?” Juyeon said with a sigh. “Or did they take someone else when I was in there?”

“No, everyone’s here.”

Yeonjun really didn’t understand what they were talking about, but he hoped they would get to explaining it all soon, so he didn’t ask.

“Most guys keep quiet,” Juyeon whispered now, so quiet Yeonjun barely heard him. He realized the sound must travel very easily in this big corridor, and Juyeon didn’t want the others to hear him. “They are scared, or hurt, and I don’t blame them for not feeling like talking. But… for me, I’d be going crazy if I didn’t have Chanhee over there to speak my mind to.”

Yeonjun expected Chanhee to say something snarky back, but he just sighed. “You’ll notice that Juyeon is the only one keeping us all alive in here,” he told Yeonjun, making him turn to look at Chanhee. “I might not have much hope left, but if not for Juyeon, all of us would have given up by now. He’s our rock. He keeps track of everyone and is always there when some of us needs some extra support.”

There was a fondness in Chanhee’s voice that Yeonjun recognized, one that told him Chanhee would do anything to protect Juyeon. It made his heart ache as he thought about his friends, who had no idea where he was or if he was okay.

“Chanhee,” Juyeon began, and then the snarky Chanhee was back.

“Just take my kind words and don’t argue about it, you know it’s true.”

Yeonjun chuckled a little at them, before continuing with his questions. “So, can you tell me what it is they’re doing to you in here?”

Another, deep sigh from Juyeon. “Well. To put it lightly, they’re experimenting. They think they’re scientists and that they’re doing humanity a great service and all that bullshit. And we’re the lab rats.”

For some reason, Yeonjun hadn’t really expected that. “What? What kind of experiments?”

“Usually, they inject us with stuff. Then they run tests on us, evaluate what our reaction is, and then take us back here. Most of the time, the injections do nothing. Sometimes, they make us sick, in one way or the other.”

“One time, my nose wouldn’t stop bleeding for days,” Chanhee filled in, “it was annoying as hell.”

“Mm,” Juyeon agreed. “We’re not really sure what their goal is, but I think they want to make us stronger or something. But from what we hear when they take us back here, so far nothing is working.” He turned, and Yeonjun assumed he was going to speak to Chanhee. He was surprised when Juyeon spoke loud enough for the entire corridor to hear. “Guys, I just want to tell you what I heard today.”

Yeonjun’s ears perked when he heard the noise of several people shifting in their cells – some of them probably having been half asleep – to listen more closely to Juyeon.

“Mr X was talking about how nothing was working, and that they wanted to try ‘a new formula’ or something. Apparently, they have found a new doctor that’s going to help them. Maybe we should be ready for things to become a bit worse from here on.”

“What do you mean, worse?” a weak voice spoke from further down the corridor. The guy sounded scared, for sure, but he still dared to ask Juyeon about it.

“I’m not sure, Heesung-ah. Hopefully, they won’t change their tactics too much. But I think it’s good to be ready for some change, is all.”

The guy named Heesung mumbled an, “okay,” and then Yeonjun could tell the conversation was over. Juyeon turned to look at Yeonjun again.

“Mr X is the guy who’s in charge here, we think. He’s like the head scientist, the one who stands behind calling the shots and telling the rest of them what to do. You’re gonna notice him, he’s always wearing a black coat with a white X on the front.”

“I see,” Yeonjun said, nodding.

“What else can we warn you about…” Juyeon thought for a moment. “Well, so most of the time, they take one of us in at a time. But sometimes it’s several of us, if there’s some special experiment going on. When they take one, that person is usually gone for the day, and comes back the next. They usually monitor you for several days after an experiment, but it depends on the situation. You’re gonna figure out how it works.” Juyeon took a deep breath, and Yeonjun could see the apologetic look on his face. “I wish you wouldn’t have to, but… yeah.”

“I get it.” Yeonjun hugged himself tightly, suddenly feeling very cold. “But… are you guys okay? How long have you been here?”

“I’ve been here the longest,” Juyeon said. “I’m not really sure how long… wait, what date is it?”

Yeonjun also wasn’t quite sure, all he knew was the day he’d been drugged on. He hoped it hadn’t been too long since then, because he hated losing track of time. “It’s Christmas break, I think it should be the 23^rd, or 24^th maybe.”

“Of December?” Juyeon sounded a bit sick. “Shit, then it’s been at least four months…”

“I’m sorry,” Yeonjun said, even though he knew it was useless to apologize for telling the truth.

“To answer your other question,” Chanhee said when Juyeon suddenly disappeared from the window, and Yeonjun heard him plop down on the bed in his cage. “No, we’re not okay. We’re alive, and we’re holding on, but we’re not okay. We want to go back to our families. We want to get out of here like yesterday.”

Yeonjun didn’t have an answer to that, but Chanhee didn’t seem to expect one. The conversation ended, then, and Yeonjun was left to ponder everything he’d been told. There were still things he didn’t understand, holes in the story he wished they’d told him, but one thing he understood loud and clear.

These guys had been here too long already.

-

A few hours passed before anything happened. Yeonjun moved around in his room, shifting from sitting or lying on the bed, to sitting in the corner, to staring out into the corridor, trying but failing to see anything in the dark.

The thoughts were running wild in Yeonjun’s head. He was, of course, scared for himself, but somehow, he wasn’t focusing much on that. Instead, he found himself wondering what was going on outside of this building. How had his parents reacted when he never showed up? Did they find his phone, left behind at the crime scene, or did the kidnappers bring it with them to avoid leaving a trail? Had they called the police yet?

What worried him more was how his friends were reacting to the news of his disappearance. At least half a day must have passed, and there was no way Soobin wouldn’t have realized something was wrong yet. Just the fact that Yeonjun never called him to announce he had reached his destination was proof enough that something had happened.

He was sat leaning his head back against the bars when the alarming noise of the door opening sounded through the area, and suddenly light washed over them. He shifted in his seat, trying to get a view of the people walking out through the door at the right end of the corridor – from where they had appeared before with Juyeon. Craning his neck, he caught sight of a pair of legs, clad in black pants and shiny shoes.

The body belonging to those legs soon came into his view as well, and he barely had time to register that one of the two guys walking were the same one who had doused him in perfume, before they had stopped by his door.

A key was put in the lock, and suddenly the door swung open, causing him to fall flat on his back.

If he had been more alert, maybe he could have taken the opportunity to make a run for it. But, well. He was neither ready for moving faster than sloth pacing, nor did he know where to go if he had the chance.

Hands were grabbing him before he could even sit up, and suddenly he was hauled to his feet and dragged out into the corridor. At first, he struggled against them, refusing to be handled like that.

Suddenly, Chanhee appeared behind the bars of his cage, shaking his head at Yeonjun in warning. The sight startled him into compliance, and so when they started moving, he walked without fight. He felt nearly ashamed doing so, as if he was betraying himself and his own sense of self preservation.

They led him to a clinically clean room and deposited him on a bed. Before he could even try to escape, they had him tied at his arms and legs. The constraints were so tight he felt a panful tug at the smallest amount of movement.

He had expected the men to leave after securing him, but instead they positioned themselves at either side of the door. They were clearly waiting for something – or someone, more likely.

One of them met his eyes, and Yeonjun took that as his moment to speak. “Why are you doing this?” he asked, focusing his stare on the smaller of the two men. The tall guy was the one he had recognized from before, and he did not seem to want to acknowledge Yeonjun’s presence.

Neither of them answered, of course.

“What do you think you’re doing here? Science? This is insane!”

Yeonjun startled into silence when the door opened, revealing a man in a black robe. “You are correct, boy,” the man stated as he moved inside. He had a clipboard in his hands, reminding Yeonjun of a doctor. Nothing in his demeanour made him seem doctor-like, though. “We’re doing very important science here. And you get to take part in it.”

“In science there’s this thing called informed consent, have you heard of it?” he spat back, sitting up the best he could with his arms tied at the wrists. “What you’re doing is illegal. None of us have consented to this.”

“Now, now,” the man said, and as he came closer Yeonjun took noticed of the white mark on his robe, just above where his heart would be. An X. So, this was the infamous Mr X. It didn’t surprise him. “The importance of what we are doing puts us above the law. You will see one day. When we make our breakthrough, you won’t be so ungrateful.”

Yeonjun snorted humorlessly. “You can’t be serious.”

The man wasted no more words on him. He walked over to his bed and forced Yeonjun onto his back. There was no use of fighting back, as the man was much stronger than him, and Yeonjun was already exhausted from the lack of sleep and food.

As soon as he had Yeonjun on his back, he leaned over him and placed something around Yeonjun’s throat. Yeonjun let out a choked gasp as Mr X tightened what must be some sort of collar around his neck.

Fuck, he thought as panic threatened to dig its claws in him. He forced himself to calm down, knowing panicking would not help him in this situation. At least he could still breathe, even if it was uncomfortable, to say the least.

Mr X worked quietly and rapidly, giving the impression of a man who had done this a thousand times before. With many different instruments, he tested Yeonjun’s blood pressure, measured his heartbeat, took vials of his blood, shone light into his eyes… the list went on and on. It felt like a bizarrely long doctor’s visit, because most of the tests were common and simple. The only one he did not recognize (and that he did not think would have been approved at a normal hospital) was when he sliced Yeonjun’s skin with a scalpel and patiently measured the time it took for the cut to stop bleeding.

Ironically enough, after running his tests he tried to get Yeonjun to answer some questions.

“How old are you?”

“Do you have any chronic illnesses?”

“Has anyone in your family suffered from cancer?”

“Is your bloodline purely human?”

Yeonjun stubbornly didn’t answer a single one of his questions. He took pride in how it seemed to slowly but surely start to annoy Mr X.

“You’re just like the rest,” Mr X said after Yeonjun had refused to answer his tenth question. He went from standing above Yeonjun back to the table across the room where he had placed most of his instruments earlier. “All of you, when you first come here you think you can keep your resolve. Stay strong and do whatever you can to oppose me. But you see, every single on caves sooner or later.” He turned around and took slow steps back over to Yeonjun on the bed.

In his hand was a syringe, larger than any syringe Yeonjun had seen before. His eyes bulged as he took it in, and his breath got stuck in his throat as Mr X came closer and closer.

“You can either do it the easy way and answer my questions,” Mr X continued. When he reached Yeonjun, he bent over him and raised the syringe to Yeonjun’s face to allow him a look of it. “Or, you can do it the hard way. It won’t matter to me. I will get my answers, and I will run my tests, no matter what you choose.”

Yeonjun gulped, fear grabbing a hold of his throat and making it hard to breathe. He didn’t know what was in the syringe or what it would do to him. He very much did not want to find out, but he also hated the thought of giving in. There was no way he was going to just accept the threats and start spewing everything without any second thought to this madman.

Mr X must have seen in his eyes how Yeonjun had made his decision, because he leaned back slightly and let out a sigh. “Ah, you’re one of those. Well, as you wish.”

The syringe disappeared from Yeonjun’s view, but a second later he could feel as the tip of it touched the side of his neck. He froze in shock, fear trickling over his skin like the touch of ice cold water.

“Just so you know,” Mr X mused, a sadistic glint to his voice now, “this is going to hurt. Have fun.”

As the syringe was pushed into his neck, Yeonjun was overcome with a searing pain that didn’t end at the point of entrance. As whatever substance filled the syringe was pushed inside him, it felt like his veins were being filled with hot glue.

Whatever it was, the drug made Yeonjun’s brain shut down and within minutes he was nothing more than a complying zombie. He was barely aware what he was saying, his head clouded with pain and how much he wanted it to stop. He couldn’t even move, or he would have writhed around to try and get out of his own skin.

“It hurts,” he heard himself say, or at least he thought he said it out loud.

Mr X’s laugh came through to him, but before Yeonjun could register the sadistic tone of the sound, he was startled by the sound of words.

“How old are you?”

If I answer, maybe the pain will stop, Yeonjun thought briefly before mumbling, “23.”

“Do you have any chronic illnesses?”

“No. Not that I know of.”

-

It must have been hours later that Yeonjun was deposited back in his cell. He wasn’t aware of the passage of time, only of how little by little, the glue in his veins started to dissipate and the pain was slowly starting to ease. His mind was a big mess, after being placed on his hard bed in the dark cell all he could do was stare up at the ceiling.

“Yeonjun?”

The voice was slightly familiar, but in the moment Yeonjun couldn’t put a name to it. Even now, he still felt the need to answer any question asked of him.

“Yes?” he said, feeling his mouth move but not feeling like it was by his own accord.

“Are you okay?”

“It hurts,” he said, because it was the simplest truth, with no need to dive into his emotional state. He didn’t think he could put that into words, anyways.

Another voice, from slightly farther away. “They gave him the shot, Juyeon, what did you expect?”

Juyeon. Right, Juyeon was his name. Yeonjun remembered.

“Juyeon,” he mumbled, calling out to him.

“Yeah? What is it, Yeonjun?”

He felt awfully small, lying there. A tear rolled down his cheek as he wished he could just go to sleep and wake up back in his own bed in the morning. That all of this was just a terrible nightmare. But he knew it wasn’t. He could feel it in his bones, that this pain was not merely a figment of his imagination. It was real.

“When will it go away? When will it stop?”

“Oh Yeonjun,” there was pain in Juyeon’s voice now as well. “Soon. It won’t last more than a few hours longer.”

“Are you sure? It hurts so much.” He let out a sob he couldn’t control, and then suddenly he could move again. It didn’t make things better, but at least he could roll around and try to get some relief from the burning in his veins.

“I promise. I promise, it’s going to go away soon. Just hold on. It’s going to be okay.”

With Juyeon whispering reassurances to him, Yeonjun tried his best to believe them. It was all he could do to believe, to hope that the pain wasn’t forever. Either that or go insane in this forsaken cell.

-

The pain did go away, eventually. But the drug still left Yeonjun feeling wrong, as if it had left some residual inside of him that would jump out any second and start hurting him all over again. Juyeon told him that it wasn’t real, that it was just part of his fear response.

Juyeon had also told him about the drug. They didn’t know what it was, only that it left you basically paralyzed and in blasting pain for hours before it finally wore off. It made you zombie-like, which made it easy for Mr X to do whatever he wanted with you. They didn’t even remember much after being under its influence, as the pain overshadowed anything else.

Yeonjun found he agreed fully with Juyeon’s explanation. He barely remembered anything after those hours, the pain being the only constant thing in his mind. It was scary, that there existed drugs like that, and even more so that they could be found in hands of people like Mr X.

“As today was your first day,” Juyeon was explaining, looking down from his little window at Yeonjun who was sitting on the ground in the middle of his cell, “he just gathered all the data about you that he needs to monitor for the next couple of experiments. Like, your weight, your blood content, how quickly your wounds heal, stuff like that.”

“It’s like we’re his lab rats,” Chanhee filled in from the other side, where he was sitting with his back against the bars. His voice was filled with poison. “He’s doing all his little experiments on us, and then monitoring our bodies’ responses to see if anything changes. It’s sick.”

Juyeon gave Yeonjun a sheepish look that said, ‘he’s not wrong, but it doesn’t help to complain about it’. Yeonjun understood Chanhee, though. It was easy to become bitter and hateful when all your basic human rights were taken from you.

After that, the days dragged on very slowly. It was hard to even keep track of the days, since they never got a glimpse of the outside or a clock. They were served food on the same three times every day, though, so there was at least that.

Being the newest guy there, in the beginning Yeonjun was taken into Mr X’s room at least once a day. At first, Mr X was not telling him anything about what he was injecting him with or what the purpose of any of his experiments were. It didn’t matter much to Yeonjun, since knowing about it wouldn’t prevent it from happening.

As the days passed, Yeonjun felt more and more for the rest of the guys who had been trapped in there for such a long time. He understood how they lost their hope, and he could imagine himself doing so sooner or later. But he was new, fresh meat, and he had fight in him.

So, for the first week or so, Yeonjun did whatever he could to resist. When the guys came to get him, he pulled and thrashed in their grip, trying to get loose so he could run in the opposite direction, to try and get to the door on the other side of the corridor. He never made it.

Whenever he resisted, they would deal with him by injecting him with a calming drug, similar to the zombie drug but less painful, that would make it easier to take him with them. It didn’t stop him from trying, though. He felt the need to show the other guys that he still had some fight in him, that he wouldn’t just accept his fate. Anything to try and bring their spirits up a little.

One night Yeonjun was lying on his bed, crying silently from the pain in his arms where Mr X had cut him all the way down to his elbows. When he hadn’t healed up right, like Mr X apparently was expecting, Mr X had cursed and wrapped the wounds up in a hurry. He hadn’t cared to disinfect the wounds or give Yeonjun any sort of pain relief.

“Yeonjun,” Juyeon whispered, gaining his attention. The other couldn’t be seen from the little window, meaning he was probably sitting on his bed as well. Yeonjun knew he must be exhausted as well, having seen him get dragged to the lab just before him that morning.

“Yeah, hyung?”

Having their cells next to each other meant Yeonjun and Juyeon talked a lot. Sometimes Chanhee joined in, but mostly he seemed to be sleeping. That or listening to Yeonjun and Juyeon talk. He had learnt that both Juyeon and Chanhee were one year older than him, but the rest of the guys seemed to be younger.

“Is there anyone you miss?” Juyeon was asking, trying to get Yeonjun’s mind on something other than the excruciating pain in his arms. “Anyone you want to get back to?”

Sometimes they would talk about their lives. It was an easy topic, but it also hurt to talk about, since they were quite literally stuck in there. Juyeon always made it feel like they were talking about something they would get back to, though, which was what made it bearable.

“Yes,” Yeonjun answered sombrely. He had been thinking about them a lot, since the moment he was put in there. “My best friends, mostly.”

“Tell me about them?”

That was another nice thing about Juyeon; he never forced anything out of Yeonjun. He wanted to know more, but he understood if Yeonjun couldn’t bring himself to talk about some things. It was part of the reason why Yeonjun felt safe to tell Juyeon about himself and everything inside his mind.

“I have three,” he started explaining, trying to keep it light and not dive too deep inside his own emotions, at least for the time being. “Kai is the youngest. I met him less than two years ago, but it feels like we’re family. He’s like a goofy, prankster little brother, always laughing and teasing the hell out of me. He’s super tall too, makes me feel like I’m the kid and not him.” He smiled up at the ceiling, imagining Kai kicking him when they played video games, the way he would laugh loudly whenever he beat Yeonjun.

“Then… there’s Taehyun. He’s the same age as Kai. He’s, like, an angel. A muscley, stern looking one that has the most dazzling smile you’ll ever see. He always looks out for me, always knows what to say, and is the best listener. He’s a bit too honest sometimes, and he doesn’t beat around the bush, but he’s great. He’s always been there for me.”

His smile turned sad at the thought of Taehyun. Taehyun and Kai. Their youngest. He loved them. He missed them. His heart hurt almost as much as his arms, thinking about them.

“And the third?” Juyeon asked when Yeonjun had been quiet for a bit too long.

Ah, yes. The third one.

“Soobin. A year younger than me. He’s also an angel, but in his own way. He can be really goofy and weird sometimes, but he’s also the kindest person ever. He’s like my soulmate. We just go together perfectly, and I could never have a bad time in his presence. I-” Yeonjun hesitated. I love him, he wanted to say. I’m in love with him. But maybe it was too much to tell Juyeon – and the rest of the guys, knowing they were most likely listening to them as well – after only a few days of knowing him.

“They sound nice,” Juyeon said, and Yeonjun missed his chance to say more about Soobin. It was probably for the best, because Yeonjun could talk forever about Soobin.

Yeonjun hummed in response, shifting his arms a bit to try and find a less painful position but failing. “What about you?”

“My friends too, for sure. Kevin, Jaehyun, Younghoon. But right now, I can only think about my sisters.”

“You have sisters?” Yeonjun wished he could see Juyeon’s face as he talked about them, that he could see his eyes light up at the mention of the people he loved the most.

“Mm. Two of them. Minyeon and Seoyeon. They’re twins.”

Yeonjun imagined two girls that looked like Juyeon. “How old are they?”

“Eight,” Juyeon answered, sounding a bit hollow.

“I’m sure they miss their big brother a lot.”

“Yeah.” Yeonjun swore he heard Juyeon sniffle. “I miss them, at least. I wish I could tell them that I’m okay, you know? I don’t want them to think the worst.”

Yeonjun agreed. He hated the thought of Soobin and the guys, even his parents, thinking the worst. Thinking he was dead. He didn’t wish that sorrow, that grief on them, so he held onto the belief that they would wait for him. That they would keep looking, keep searching for him and hoping that he would come back one day. Because he would. He had to. There was no way he was dying in there.

--

Two weeks in, Yeonjun was convinced he was dying.

The latest injection he had been given had just started to show its effect. It had his heart trying to beat out of his chest, and his arms going numb. He didn’t know what a heart attack felt like, but he had heard about the symptoms. It sure felt like he was having one.

The lab coats had done nothing about it. They had thrown Yeonjun in his cell and let him stay there even when Juyeon was crying out for help. Yeonjun had fallen on the floor in his hurry to get to the door, trying to make his way out even though he knew it would be locked. His legs had given up beneath him and he ended up rolling onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

As his heart beat harder and harder, he had tried to grasp at it on top of his chest. He clawed at his skin, thinking it might help, but it probably made things even worse. It hurt and he was panicking and he was possibly dying. But the scientists did nothing.

Thankfully, Yeonjun didn’t die.

However, after that night, the little belief he had held onto that those scientists might still be human beings had crumbled and died. There was no redeeming them.

-

Three weeks had passed – although to Yeonjun it was just a flurry of days that he had lost count of – when he overheard a conversation he was probably not supposed to hear.

He’d been taken for his daily injections, propped up on the table and dosed up on drugs to keep him numb. Mr X had stepped outside for a moment, perhaps to grab a new torture tool to use on Yeonjun, when the two guards in the room started gossiping. If it could be called that.

Yeonjun was usually out of it by that point, which was probably why they felt safe to talk in there. He himself didn’t know why he was still awake, but he was thankful for it as his curiosity made him listen carefully to their words.

“Did you hear what they were discussing this morning? About the next snatch mission?” the first guy, a gangly looking dude – who was much stronger than he looked, Yeonjun had found out – was saying.

“Another snatch? I guess it’s been a few weeks since this one, but aren’t they scared to grab the authorities’ attention?” said the second dude, a taller, bearded guy with a deep and accented voice.

“I think they’re desperate,” dude one said. “I mean, nothing seems to be working, and most of them seem to be too worn out by now. Maybe too weak to be worth studying for much longer.”

“Wait, wasn’t there talk of switching them, too?”

“Yeah, I think that’s part of the plan. Like, getting rid of the ones that have been here the longest and getting some new meat that might actually give them some result.”

“What would they be doing with the old ones, then? They can’t just let them go home and expect them not to snitch.”

Dude number one chuckled at that, which made Yeonjun want to strangle him. “No, of course not. Don’t you know what happens to lab rats when they’re of no use any longer?”

They get euthanised, Yeonjun thought in horror. Dread filled his entire body, and he wanted to fight against his bonds, to free himself so he could run back to the boys and let them out of their cells. He couldn’t let them get killed, he just couldn’t.

Mr X chose that moment to return to the room, ending the conversation between the two guards. Yeonjun wanted to scream; he needed to find out more information. Was the plan real? Was it already set in place? How much time did they have left before it was too late?

Unlike most times Mr X was working on Yeonjun, this time he was more talkative. “Look here, boy. This is our newest formula, and you get to be the first one I test it on. Isn’t it exciting?”

Exciting my ass, Yeonjun thought as he prepared himself to feel the usual sting in his arm.

There was no gigantic syringe that time, though. Instead, there was only a small prick, and when Yeonjun looked down he saw a tiny needle getting inserted into his vein. The confusion must have been evident on his face because Mr X was happy to explain.

“We’ve theorized that a slow distribution might give your body more time to adjust, rather than the old ‘everything at once’ approach.”

Yeonjun continued being confused, until he noticed the big bag of murky liquid Mr X was hanging up next to his bed. From it, a tube meandered down towards him that Mr X inserted into the needle in his arm.

This time, he didn’t feel anything at all. It made him uneasy, especially when Mr X kept his eyes on him for what must have been minutes.

“It will take a couple of hours for all of it to get into your system,” Mr X mused when he seemed to have decided everything had gone according to plan.

Yeonjun wondered if he’d be allowed to go back to his cell. It took him a minute to realize he wouldn’t be given such luxury, because Mr X simply took off his gloves, grabbed his notepad and left the room. The guards were still there, but in contrast to before they were being awfully quiet. Maybe they were as scared of Mr X as he was.

Well, no matter where he was, Yeonjun thought he could take the opportunity to get some sleep. He was always tired – no, exhausted – nowadays, and in that moment he was glad for it because it meant he would fall asleep in minutes.

And fall asleep he did. Only to wake not much later to the feeling of burning up.

He writhed on the bed, or tried to, since the restraints were still in place, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. His head was beating painfully, and his skin was covered in a layer of sweat.

A flash of fear pained him as he thought that the drugs had finally served their cause. Glancing to the right, he saw that the bag connected to his arm was nearly empty, only about a fifth of its content left.

It must have been hours since he fell asleep, he guessed. Still, he didn’t feel rested; in fact, it was the opposite. He was feverish and uncomfortable, and he felt like his head would explode.

“Please,” he muttered, eyes closing as he couldn’t take the light that shone blindingly down onto him. Despite just haven woken up, he was already breathless. “Please, why can’t you just let me go?”

He didn’t even know who he was talking to, hadn’t checked if those guards were still there. His voice was most likely not strong enough for them to hear it anyways. But he still couldn’t help the pleas because what else was he supposed to do? Lie there and take it like a champ? Well, he would have to do that no matter what, because he knew there was no way these people would help him. There was no way they would act to ease his pain in any way, because to them he was just an animal. A means to an end. His pain was just another variable, something for them to take into consideration in their science.

The heat kept building inside him, and with it Yeonjun became less and less coherent. He lost track of time, and possibly even space as he started wandering back and forth between awake and dreaming.

At one point, he thought he saw Soobin. The sweet boy had smiled at him, his dimples on display, and Yeonjun had gently cupped his face in his hands. Afterwards he wasn’t sure if he had been dreaming or simply hallucinating, but it didn’t matter much. At least the thought of Soobin had given him some comfort in his tortured state.

Yeonjun must have passed out, because he never heard Mr X come back to check up on the state of him nor take the bag out of his arm. The next thing he knew, he was once again deposited on his hard bed, the cool surface against him a somewhat comfort against his burning skin.

Like always, Juyeon called out his name once the guards had disappeared behind the door again. This time, Yeonjun was unable to answer. He didn’t even try, because the numbness in him made it impossible to try to move. He felt like a stone, or maybe a burning block of lava flowing ever so slowly down a volcano’s side.

When everything else was impossible, Yeonjun focused on just breathing. In and out, over and over and over again. It was all he could do; all he could think about. Sooner or later, it would pass, he knew, so he just had to keep breathing. And stay alive.

Once the haze over his mind started lifting, suddenly the urgent matter Yeonjun wished he had remembered earlier came back to him.

He gasped loudly, possibly alerting all of the guys at the same time. Good. They all should hear about it.

“Guys,” he rasped, and hearing his voice he knew it wasn’t loud enough. He was still lying on his bed, not the best way to make a speech. Despite the burning and the aching, he forced himself to sit, then he slid down on his knees on the ground. His legs wouldn’t carry him, he already knew, but he could make it over to the door on his knees and arms.

With his face against the bars, staring down the corridor where he knew the other nine guys were sitting, waiting for him, Yeonjun spoke up. “Guys, we’re in trouble.”

“What do you mean?” Chanhee asked, meeting Yeonjun’s eyes from the other side. Yeonjun knew the urgency in his voice had been clear when he saw the focused yet worried look in Chanhee’s eyes – he who otherwise never cared to show any emotions.

“I overheard the guards talking when they thought I was out. It’s… they talked about a ‘snatch mission’, and I think that means they are planning to kidnap more kids.”

Heesung, the younger guy in the cell next to Chanhee, who Yeonjun had only heard speaking a handful of times, said, “That’s awful and all, but what has that got to do with us? We can’t stop them from in here.”

“I know,” Yeonjun said, knowing he had to get to the point even if he wished he didn’t have to say it. “But that’s not all. They said the plan is to do a ‘switch’, like, with the ones that have been here the longest and get some new guys. They said… some of you are too worn out to- to be of any use to them for much longer.”

There was an eerie quiet as he let the words sink in. He had expected gasps, or perhaps cries, but not this complete silence.

It was Juyeon who broke the silence first. He sounded, for the first time, utterly hopeless. “They’re not going to let us go, are they?” Yeonjun kept silent, but they all knew what that meant anyway. “Of course not. I knew I was going to die in here, but I didn’t think I would be put down like an animal.”

Hearing Juyeon like that seemed to break the other guys. Suddenly, Yeonjun heard sniffles and banging on metal, whispers of words he couldn’t make out as the boys realized that they were doomed. And Yeonjun understood; he too had felt like Juyeon was his lifeline, that should Juyeon give up he might not have it in him to make it much longer. But now, suddenly, he didn’t feel like giving up.

Suddenly, every fiber in his body screamed at him to save these boys. He didn’t really care much about himself in that moment; all he needed was to make sure that not a single one of these innocent boys came to harm.

“We’re not giving up.”

Yeonjun had spoken loud and clear, his tone firm to get his message across. The sounds still continued as if he hadn’t been heard, but that only made the fire burn brighter inside him.

He stood on his unsteady feet, grabbing the bars like his life depended on it. “Hey!” he nearly yelled, gathering their attention. “Listen to me. I won’t let anyone die. We can’t give up now.” He looked into Chanhee’s cell, where there was only darkness now as the other guy had disappeared from the door. His eyes shifted to the left, finding Heesung staring at him with desperation in his eyes.

“I know you don’t want to die,” he continued, enforcing his words. “I don’t want to die, and I sure as hell don’t want any of you to die. Now,” he lowered his voice, realizing he didn’t want it to carry all the way to where the guards resided, “we have to make a plan. Anyone got any ideas?”

Frankly, Yeonjun had expected it to turn eerily quiet again, so when Juyeon spoke once more he sharpened his ears. “I might have some ideas,” he said, still sounding a bit defeated. “I’m sorry for before. I didn’t mean to sound like I had given up.”

For not the first time, Yeonjun desperately wanted to hug Juyeon. “Don’t be sorry,” Yeonjun mumbled loud enough for Juyeon to hear. He swayed a little on his feet, once again reminded of his own vulnerability and how unwell he really was. “We can’t be strong all the time. Now tell me what you’ve got.”

Since Juyeon had been there the longest, he’d had the most time to study and take in the routines of the guards and the scientists. As he started relaying it all, it struck Yeonjun just how intelligent Juyeon really was, because he himself hadn’t even thought to take note of all that.

He had counted seven different guards who worked in shifts. Two of them worked regular shifts, always the same times and nothing outside of their schedule. The other five worked irregularly, sometimes during the night, sometimes during the mornings, always shifting between each other without pattern. There were three scientists, at least that he had seen of yet. Out of them, Mr X was the leader, and most often the other two would accompany him as assistants. It was a surprise to Yeonjun, who so far had only been met by Mr X in the lab.

“One of the guards is weaker than the others,” Juyeon explained, his voice clear but quiet so as to not alert the guards. “Not, like physically, but he might be less heartless than the others. I’ve noticed that when he ties me down, he gives me some wiggle space, and he never handles me roughly. I also think he’s less careful, like he doesn’t double check, if you know what I mean.”

“Okay, so what do we do about that information, then?” Chanhee asked, having come back to sitting by the bars by now.

“Well, first of all, our best shot is to have one of us get out and get help,” Juyeon said. Instinctively, Yeonjun nodded. “They are kind of relying on that we are all exhausted and starved, so they don’t expect any of us to be strong enough to fight back. Which is why I propose that we choose one of us that should escape, and we give him parts of our portions to make him gather up his energy.”

“Yeah, sure, sounds reasonable,” Chanhee said, thinking out loud. “How about the escaping part? He will still not have a shot against two guards at once, even if it’s this ‘weak guard’ handling him.”

Juyeon hummed thoughtfully. “Yes, that’s true, isn’t it… Well, what if the rest of us start a distraction? Like, causing one of the guards to go out, which leaves him against only one of them? Maybe then…”

“Then we would have to time it perfectly,” Chanhee argued.

“Well, yes, but I think it could work. I could time how long it takes for the guards to come and get me until they’ve got me tied down.”

Yeonjun thought about it. “But that means you have to be out here when it’s time for the escape,” he said as soon as he realized it.

“Yes,” Juyeon said, clearly having thought so already. “I never said I had to be the one to escape.”

Oh. Well, Yeonjun had just assumed it would be Juyeon, because it was so fitting. He had been there the longest, he knew the most about the building, and he was the one that deserved to get out of there the most.

“Well, who should it be, then?” Yeonjun asked.

Chanhee let out a snort. “Isn’t it obvious?” He looked Yeonjun in the eyes, leaning his face forward until his features were illuminated by the light from the end of the corridor. “It has to be you, of course.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you.” Chanhee shook his head, but there was no glare in his eyes when he looked at Yeonjun. It was a look of determination more than anything else. “Not just because you’re the newest, but also kind of because you’re the newest. I mean, we all know you have the most energy of all of us. Hell, you were the one to remind us we have to fight back and get out of here just now, which proves your determination. I think I speak for all of us when I say that I trust you to get us out of here.”

Yeonjun was stunned into silence. Really? They dared put that much trust in him? After having heard him cry during the nights, hearing him complain about his pains as if not every single one of them was in pain.

“Yeonjun-ah, Chanhee is right,” Juyeon said, and suddenly Yeonjun caught sight of his head in the little window looking down at him. He could see the shadow of his smile on his face even in the darkness. “We trust you, and we believe in you. Will you do this for us?”

Oh.

He felt like a fist had taken hold of his heart, lifting him up and making him stronger. Of course, he would do it for them. If they dared trust him, he would do the same. He would trust himself to succeed. For them.

“Yes,” he said loud and clear. “I will.”

-

Chapter Text

It was easier said than done to plan an escape and set it into place. They had started immediately, and so when the next meal arrived, they managed to send parts of their portions between their plates until they reached Yeonjun. Suddenly, he was met with portions big enough for two, and he had to struggle to get it all down the first few times. He felt bad for taking from the others, but he did not complain about it, because he knew it was a necessity. He needed his energy back.

They also talked through the plan every day, going over what weaknesses there might be and what to do should something go wrong. They all knew without saying it that they would only have one shot, because should they fail, the security would most likely double. Which made it even more important that they all knew what needed to be done before the time came.

Juyeon told them all about the backroom to the lab, which lay behind the door opposite the one they were always taken in through. Yeonjun had seen the door but not thought much of it, since he had not once seen it open. Apparently, Mr X had come through it once when Juyeon was supposed to have been unconscious, and he had caught sight of the room behind it then. It was a small room, very clean and devoid of furniture. What was interesting was that there had been a window, one big enough for one of them to climb out of.

The only problem was, Juyeon didn’t know what lay outside the window. Nor how high up in the building they were. Still, that window was probably their best shot. 

So, the plan boiled down to Yeonjun getting out of his restraints by overpowering the one guard before he was completely tied down and then making his escape through that door and hopefully through that window.

To Yeonjun, there were too many uncertainties, too many variables that they’d have to rely on luck to get through. That door could easily be locked, same went for the window. He could time his attack wrong and end up getting tranquilized by the guard in a matter of seconds. Still, with what little chance they had, they had to try.

Two days after they had started forming their plan, Yeonjun was pulled back into the lab. The timing was wrong—it wasn’t the right guards working—so Yeonjun didn’t have to stress about anything except the impending experiment he would have to endure.

As soon as he came inside, he took a greater notice of the door Juyeon had talked about. There was nothing special about it; no sign or anything indicating what lay behind it. Still, his interest had been piqued.

But Mr X entered behind the guards through the main door as always. He wore the same smile as he had done last time, looking like he was expecting great things from him.

He went through the usual tests, taking Yeonjun’s blood, testing his reflexes, checking his blood pressure and eyes and all that. Yeonjun was desensitized to it by now. Not even when Mr X took out his scalpel did he flinch, having gotten used to the pain.

If Mr X found something interesting in his test results, he didn’t show it on his face. Yeonjun barely even looked at him, feeling like he wouldn’t be able to keep quiet if he saw a smile of any sort forming on his face.

Normally, after these tests Yeonjun would be patched up roughly and brought back to his cell to rest before the next experiment. That was not the case this time. Instead, Mr X brought another one of those bags filled with a disgusting looking liquid, the same colour as last time. He didn’t hesitate to push the needle into Yeonjun’s arm and connect the drip to him. Then, he left Yeonjun alone once again.

Hours later, once Yeonjun was back in his cell, he was once again feeling like he was burning up. He was less delusional this time, which he was thankful for because it meant he could listen to Juyeon and Chanhee going over the plan. Unfortunately, he was still in quite some pain and his limbs felt heavy even as he laid on his bed. He could only hope that when the perfect timing came, he wouldn’t be feeling like that.

-

Days passed. During some of them, Yeonjun was left in a haze filled mind, doing his best to stay awake and aware enough to hear the words being spoken around him. Other days, especially after each time he had been subjected to a new drip, it was a wonder if he could even stay awake.

Two days after he had received his fourth drip, Yeonjun awoke to a world of red.

Even in the little light they were given in there, he could tell that there was something inherently wrong with his eyes. Everything was tinted red, especially at the edges of his vision. He had cried out in fear, ignoring the pain in his other limbs that he had gotten accustomed to by then. But no matter where he looked, or how long he kept his eyes open, staring, the red didn’t fade.

After listening to calming words from Juyeon, and some from Jongho further down the corridor—who had apparently lost his vision for two days after one experiment but was fine now—his fear that he might be going blind slowly started to dissipate. None of them were strangers to such fear, nor did they judge Yeonjun for his reaction. Knowing that and hearing the kind tones of their voices when they spoke to him helped Yeonjun get through it.

Thankfully, after a day of his vision going haywire, his eyes started to get back to normal. It almost felt like he was seeing better than before, although it was hard to tell when all there was to see was the four dark walls of his cell.

After the fifth drip, Yeonjun was getting worried something was truly off with him. His senses were starting to go haywire; sometimes it felt like his nose was burning him because the smells surrounding him were too strong and caused him to become dizzy. Other times, he swore he could hear things he shouldn’t be hearing, like every single breath of the guys around him, or the flickering of the dim light that was their only light source on the other side of the corridor.

He was getting uncomfortable in his own skin, too, but that was less of a drastic change because he was almost always uncomfortable or in pain nowadays. Still, whenever he was trying to sleep, he noticed how his skin was itching constantly. He could swear it felt like his bones were hurting, as if he was once again put through growing pains. It was weird, how off he was feeling, but there was nothing he could do about it. He simply tried not to complain too much and hoped that his new symptoms would go away like most of his previous ones had.

-

Sometimes at night, Yeonjun would dream of Soobin.

Or, rather than sometimes, it was every time he dreamt—but that happened so seldom, because most nights he barely got any sleep. It was either pain or fear keeping him up, his brain constantly on overdrive.

But when he dreamt of Soobin, it was wonderful, at least for a moment.

His dreams weren’t filled with extraordinary scenes, like Soobin coming to rescue him on a silver horse, but instead completely mundane. Like Soobin waking him up in bed, Soobin drying his hair after a shower, or Soobin helping him fold up their laundry.

But then, his bright, happy bubble would shatter once he woke up and found himself back in his dark cell. Those kinds of dreams hurt him the most, because it would take him a couple of minutes to realise that what he’d seen in his dream was not real at all. It was far, so far away from his current reality.

Yeonjun missed his life so much. Even stuff that he normally hated—like doing laundry or studying for exams—he would have done anything to get back to it all. But most of all, he missed Soobin. His other friends, too, but there was no one that occupied his thoughts lately as much as Soobin did.

Of course, Soobin had always occupied his mind at all hours of the day. But it was different now. More intense. The longing was breaking him apart, a near physical pain that he felt in his chest, which doubled in intensity whenever he thought about Soobin.

“My sweet Yeonjun,” Soobin would say in the dream, looking at him with that goofy, lopsided smile of his that made Yeonjun melt.

On particularly bad nights, when exhaustion pulled Yeonjun under, but even sleep was not enough to keep the agony away, Soobin would try to soothe him in the dream.

“It’s okay,” he would whisper when Yeonjun laid against his chest, one of his large hands caressing Yeonjun’s cheek. “You’ll be okay, my baby. My love. You’ll be okay. We’ll be back together soon, don’t worry. I’ll be right there by your side, very soon, sweetheart.”

Yeonjun wasn’t delusional; he knew those words were spoken to him by his own subconscious, but experiencing Soobin calling him those pet names affected him on a subcellular level.

He’d get warm all over, for a moment forgetting about his horrible predicament as the thought of Soobin made him flustered and sweaty. It was a strange, new experience for him, to get such a physical reaction at just the thought of Soobin.

Then, the appearance of the guards, or a pained cry from one of the other boys would take him back to reality, and he’d realize how absurd it was that his body would react like that in a place like this.

-

“Shh, it’s okay Jongho-yah.”

On a particularly bad night, Yeonjun stared up at the ceiling feeling utterly helpless as he listened to Juyeon whispering encouraging words to Jongho, who was crying in the next cell. He had been the last one to be brought back from the lab, and they hadn’t yet been able to get him to tell them what had been done to him in the lab, as he’d been crying since the moment the guards threw him into his cell.

“It’s… not,” Jongho cried. “It’s not fucking okay! I’m. I’m…” Jongho’s breaths came in short as he tried to speak despite crying violently. “I’m tired, hyung! I can’t—I, I… I can’t anymore.” He sounded utterly defeated, his voice quieting as he spoke next. “I don’t know how long I can do this, hyung. I want to go home.”

It wasn’t the first time one of them cried and couldn’t keep it to themselves, far from it. But it was the first time someone dared say what they were all thinking: they couldn’t keep going for much longer. Not only did they have a death threat hanging over them, knowing that the guards could come to take them to their doom any day now; they were also on their last leg now.

Whenever Yeonjun thought about how he had been the last one in, and that the rest of the boys had been there months longer than him, it would hit him just how strong these boys were. For him, it had only been a couple of weeks, he thought, and so even if he lived through the same horrors as them, he was still holding onto parts of his old life.

He could only imagine what a few more months would do to him. Would he forget the last thing he said to his friends? It would surely break him in new ways, because each day that passed, he could feel himself slipping.

“I know,” Juyeon was whispering back to Jongho, but in the silent corridor his words bounced and was heard clearly in every cell. Yeonjun didn’t even have to focus to hear him. “I know it sucks and that it’s been so long, and you’re tired. Of course you are, Jongho-yah. I’m sorry you have to live through this.” He took a deep breath, and Yeonjun could picture the defeated look on his face in that moment. “I’m sorry all of you have to go through this,” he said, just slightly louder, as if he already knew they were all listening. “We just have to stay strong a little bit longer. We have a plan, and it’s going to work.”

Yeonjun stopped listening as Juyeon swore to the other guys that they would get out of there, because the anxiety was threatening to swallow him whole.

It was up to him not to screw this up. The other boys were relying on him to go through with it successfully. They were sacrificing their energy, handing him parts of their portions every day to ensure he’d gain some extra strength.

If he didn’t get them out of there, there was no hope left for them.

-

Most days lately, Yeonjun felt terrible. Nauseous and overwhelmed, most of the time. In pain, some of the time, mostly after recent injections or Mr X’s tests.

It almost felt like a joke, then, that when the right timing was upon them, Yeonjun was having a good day.

In fact, their plan seemed to align itself almost too perfectly, as Yeonjun was set to go in for another round of tests, and one of the guards that came to get him was the one they had their eyes on.

The one guy their whole plan relied on.

They didn’t have much time to get ready once they realized the time had come, but they had expected as much, thankfully. Like all the days before, Juyeon had looked through his window into Yeonjun’s cell as the guards came to retrieve him. Both of them noticed the presence of the weaker guard, and they shared a look that said it all.

It’s time.

As Yeonjun was being led down the corridor, he kept his head high and forced himself to be calm. While his senses were still a bit wonky, he did feel stronger than he had in a long time. Still, his heart was beating like crazy, in fear of messing up.

I can’t let my nerves get to me, he told himself. I can’t panic and fuck this up.

He had to focus.

The guards led him to the same room as always. Since Juyeon had mentioned it, Yeonjun had started taking notice of how routinely everything was in this place, how nothing ever changed. It was always two guards holding his arms, one of them opening the room to let the other guide him inside. One guard stayed by the door while the other forced him onto the bed.

As he noticed just how mechanical it all felt, he started to believe more and more in Juyeon’s plan. He knew Juyeon had counted the seconds it took before he was to be placed on that bed, so he wasn’t surprised when the ruckus started up from the corridor they had just left behind.

People were screaming, calling out for help and simply wailing to get some attention. Yeonjun watched the two guards react to it, felt the way the grip on his arm tightened as the smaller of the two glanced towards the other.

“What the fuck’s going on?” The one by the door questioned, a mixture between shock and annoyance on his face.

“I don’t fucking know,” the other replied. He grabbed Yeonjun’s other arm and shook him violently, trying to get any answer out of him. “What’s going on?”

Yeonjun knew he had to play the part. “I don’t know,” he whimpered, but once he was shaken even more violently, he bent in on himself and said in a shaky voice, “it—it sounds like someone’s dying. Maybe the injections were too much and—”

“Fuck, just perfect timing,” the guard by the door cursed as he turned to look out the door. The screaming was still ongoing, and the sound made Yeonjun feel a chill run down his spine. It sounded awful, like someone truly was dying.

“Just, get Kim and check what the fuck’s going on, will you,” the guard holding Yeonjun spat to the other. “Get them to calm down somehow. You know where the gas button is?”

Gas button? Yeonjun thought with a shudder. Were they going to sedate them with gas to calm them down?

Still, a spark of hope was lit in Yeonjun as the other guard nodded and disappeared out the door. Now, it was time for Yeonjun’s part of the plan.

The initial plan had been to allow himself to get put on the bed and his legs to be strapped down. Now, however, Yeonjun realized that with the other guard gone, it was a one-on-one situation, and perhaps he had more of a shot if he didn’t get any of his limbs tied up at all.

However, he wasn’t a fighter, and he knew it. He had never punched someone in his life, had never had to utilize his physical strength to get out of someone’s grasp like that. So, he needed to think.

The guard kept his grip firm – enough to leave bruises – on Yeonjun’s arms. Even if he was smaller than the other guards, he wasn’t exactly weak. He also wasn’t stupid, because he was being more careful than usual when he walked with Yeonjun into the middle of the room.

Yeonjun knew he was counting on him being in the exhausted, starved out state that all of them usually were when being brought in there. He wouldn’t know that Yeonjun had eaten food off everyone’s plates, enough to give him the strength to finally fight back.

He just hoped it would be enough.

While they walked, Yeonjun scanned the room despite already knowing everything he’d find. There was the metal table with instruments neatly aligned. Perhaps some of them could come in handy as weapons, hadn’t the table been on the other side of the bed. It was too far to be used as the element of surprise.

He didn’t have much time to think. There were only so many steps to take before they had reached the middle of the room. Once they did, the guard twisted him around – so that for a moment he was facing him – and pushed him backwards to get him to lie on the bed.

His window was disappearing. When he tried to give himself more time by resisting, he saw the realization in the guard’s eyes and knew he had to act.

He had to act NOW.

Quicker as a viper, Yeonjun ripped his arms free and pushed against his chest to get him to stumble back. He succeeded, but it only took a moment for the man to retaliate.

“Oh no you won’t,” the guard spat out, anger overtaking his features as he lunged to grab Yeonjun.

Yeonjun managed to dodge him by throwing himself to the side. It caused him to stumble, which gave the guard another chance at swinging at him.

A foot connected with Yeonjun’s side, hard enough to send him flying into the wall.

“What is this, some kind of escape mission?” the man laughed as he kicked Yeonjun again, this time in the stomach, which led to him bending over himself in pain. He leaned forward and grabbed Yeonjun’s hair, yanking on it roughly. “Pathetic.” He laughed Yeonjun in the face, the sound filled with cruelty.

It seemed the guard had accepted his victory. What he hadn’t noticed, though, was that Yeonjun had caught sight of the large, very familiar-looking metal object sticking out of the pocket on the side of the man’s pant leg.

How stupid of you to keep that there, Yeonjun thought the moment before he pounced.

The syringe was in his hands, and before the man could even react Yeonjun had already pushed the thick needle right into his leg.

An agonizing cry filled the room. Yeonjun felt the hands lose their grip in his hair, and that’s when he lifted his head and pushed with all his might. He saw how the content of the syringe decreased as it was forced to enter the man’s bloodstream and smirked at the thought that finally one of them was getting a taste of their own medicine.

It took longer than he had hoped for the man to fall victim to the zombie drug, but soon Yeonjun was standing over him, breaths heaving their way out of his chest.

He had done it. The first part of the plan was overpowering the guard and getting free. That’s what he had done.

What was the next part?

Escaping.

Right.

There was no time to lose.

He spun around, looking back and forth until he remembered the door he was supposed to exit through. Without another thought, he bolted towards it.

He cried out in relief when the door swung inwardly; he hadn’t allowed himself to think it, but if that door had been locked, it would have all been for nothing.

Behind the door lay the room Juyeon had talked about. It was small and completely empty, just like he had said. The emptiness confused Yeonjun; why would they have this room here, if there was no use of it?

Well, he didn’t care about the answer, forgetting all about it immediately when he spotted the window at the wall opposite him. He sucked in a deep breath, knowing that this was it. This was his escape route.

When he stepped up to the window, he noticed how the floor was three levels above the ground. It was probably more than a 5-meter drop, which wasn’t ideal. He would likely hurt himself on the way down, and he couldn’t afford that. Who knew how far he would get with a broken ankle – or worse, two.

But there was no other way, was there? Time was running out, and he couldn’t just stand there and stare. He needed to get out.

Thankfully, he had no trouble opening the window. It swung inwardly, and then Yeonjun was standing there, staring down at the ground so far below him.

Panicking slightly about what to do, Yeonjun leaned out the window and looked sideways. He needed something he could grab onto that could help him get down to the ground more safely.

Well, there was the drainpipe less than a meter from the window but… would it hold his weight? Maybe if he held onto it with one hand and put as much weight as possible on the window sill as he inched his way down…?

Well, he didn’t really have much of a choice but to try. The sounds coming from inside the building had quieted down by now, and he knew it was only a matter of seconds before someone would realize he was missing.

Fuck it, he thought as he swung a leg out the window. He turned to face the window and slowly inched himself as far down as he dared, legs dangling free below the window now.

Slowly, he reached out with his left hand to grab onto the drainpipe around the same level as his hip. When he felt that his grip was steady enough, he lowered himself down until he had no choice but to let go with his right hand.

He was using all his muscle strength to keep himself from losing his grip on the pipe. There was nothing in reach for him to grab onto with his right hand except the pipe, so despite not believing it would hold him, he had to grip it with both hands and inch his way down as if it was a rope. He could hear how it creaked, definitely not happy to be holding up his weight, but so far it did not sound like it was breaking. That was a good sign.

His heart was beating louder than ever in his ears and almost painfully hard in his chest, urging him to hurry up when he inched his way down as slowly as possible. It took a minute for him to reach the window below, and when he did, he grabbed onto that windowsill as if his life depended on it. Feeling like his grip was better than before, he dared glancing down at the ground.

Okay, so now it was probably just a 2 meter drop to the ground, counting from where his feet were dangling. That he could do, he thought. If he just braced his knees, he could make it.

Once again, even if he didn’t believe it, he didn’t have much of a choice but to try.

It took some immense willpower to finally let go, but once he did it took less than a second before Yeonjun’s feet hit the ground hard. He let out a loud huff, feeling the impact in his knees that made him fall over.

It did hurt, but he was pretty sure he hadn’t broken anything.

Not daring to wait another moment, Yeonjun forced himself to his feet. Despite the pounding in his legs, he started moving immediately. Every step was heavy and painful, but it wasn’t worse than what he had been through before. This he could take, because he knew that if he did, he would get away. He would have a chance to save his friends. 

Chapter Text

Yeonjun stumbled away from the building, coming onto the street. It was already dark outside, which he was thankful for since it meant he could use the darkness to hide better. Assuming anyone was coming after him. Realistically, they probably would, since his escape could lead to the downfall of their entire establishment. Despite the darkness, Yeonjun’s eyes still hurt, and every time he passed a streetlight he flinched and shielded his eyes from the sharp sting of the light.

Being beaten down and exhausted, all he could focus on was to get his legs to move forward. Away from that place. There was no time to sit down and rest, or celebrate that he escaped, because they could come after him any minute now.

Only when he’d been walking for five minutes did he have the mind to look around and try and take in the surrounding area, and that’s when he realized how central the building was located. He had expected an abandoned building in the middle of nowhere, not an old office building in an industry area.  

At this time of day, there were no people around, only buildings, parked cars, and empty roads. Was that a good thing? It was and it was not. Good, because that meant no witnesses, no one that could rat him out to the people that were chasing him. He couldn’t trust anyone right now, couldn’t risk getting caught escaping, not when everyone in there relied on him.

Bad, because it meant there was no one around that could help him, either.

As that thought hit him, and the reality of his situation settled in, he forced himself to start running. There was no time to spare, and the more he thought about his friends in there, the stronger the adrenaline pumped through him.

It didn’t matter that his body was sore, that his eyes were hurting or that he felt so weak that he could faint any moment; all he could focus on was that he needed to get away, and fast. If he was caught, they’d increase the safety and none of them would ever get out of there again. They only had this one shot, and it was his job to make it. This was not about his own safety, his own life, but about the other boys in there.

Despite his energy being depleted, Yeonjun ran for longer than he ever thought he could. It was almost as if his instincts took over, his mind checking out as his body kept on going. He made turns here and there as if he knew where he was going, until he wound up bent over, heaving from exhaustion in a less abandoned area. He was standing in a bush behind a bus stop, hiding from the eyes of the cars passing by, just in case.

It took a while for him to calm down, but when he could breathe well enough again, he straightened and looked around. In that moment, he was once again hit by all his senses. His eyes seemed to never fully adjusting; even if he was seeing well in the dark, every car and streetlight stung and blinded him.

He had an overall sense of something being inherently wrong, like anxiety in his chest but ten times stronger. It almost felt like his skin was vibrating and that he could sense the world around him in a way he never could before. It was hard to explain, and even harder to understand.

Everything was also much louder than before, as if someone had turned up the volume of the whole world and Yeonjun’s ears weren’t informed. So, that hadn’t gone away like he’d hoped it would. Had streetlights always given off sparking sounds? Like small lightening cracking inside them? And why could he hear the footsteps of the couple walking on the other side of the road, hundreds of meters away?

Seeing the couple piqued his interested, and he took an unsteady step forward. He was in a more rural area now, and hopefully they could help him if he just asked for a phone or something.

The second he stepped closer to them he was hit by a wind carrying a smell so strong he froze immediately.

He was filled with an unexplainable feeling of wrongness. He couldn’t explain it, just that it smelled wrong. Unsafe. Suddenly, the mere thought of calling out to them, of having their eyes on him, made him shake with fear.

What the hell? It didn’t make any sense. He was in desperate need of help, yet he couldn’t make himself ask for it.

Why were his instincts telling him not to approach this couple?

He watched them pass by him on the other side, neither of them noticing him as they were too preoccupied with their conversation. Yeonjun sucked in a couple of unsteady, quiet breaths, trying to understand what his nose was telling him.

It took him almost too long to figure it out, but suddenly the answer came to him.

Humans.

They were humans, and somehow, he was able to distinguish that from the way they smelled. Somehow, he was able to smell them from across the street.

What had the injections done to him?

Yeonjun could feel the panic rising in his chest, threatening to choke him.

I can’t afford to break down right now, he thought, forcing a big gulp of air down his lungs. They are counting on me. I just need to keep going.

So, he filed any thoughts away for later, postponing the panic attack as much as possible. His job was to get to somewhere safe, not to freak out in the middle of an open street.

“Hello, are you okay there, Sweetie?”

Yeonjun jerked so violently at the sound of a female voice close to him that he nearly fell over. He had been too focused on the couple that he hadn’t noticed her sneaking up on him.

How damn stupid could he be, letting down his guard like that?

Turning, he saw the woman who had spoken to him. She looked to be his mother’s age, with short hair cut just below her ears and a few wrinkles around the eyes. She looked like a kind woman, despite the distraught look on her face.

“Oh my,” she said when Yeonjun turned around and his eyes fell on her. Her eyes had widened slightly, and then she was taking a careful step closer to him.

Instantly, Yeonjun took a step back. He couldn’t trust her, shouldn’t, because what if she was working with them? What if she was sent there to trick him, since she looked kind and like the type of woman that would help a stranger in need?

“Are you okay, dear?” she asked, and she’d stopped trying to get closer when she noticed his reaction. “You’re shaking.”

Was he? He hadn’t noticed. Probably she was right. He couldn’t really feel anything right now.

“You shouldn’t be out here, looking like this. You don’t know who you’re going to run into.” She tilted her head to the side, looking at him with a gentle expression on his face, as if she was talking to a hurt animal.

Yeonjun stared wide-eyed. He sucked in a large breath through his nose without thinking, and suddenly was overwhelmed with how strong she smelled.

In contrast to the couple before, the way she smelled calmed him, made him feel safe. There was no instant fear reaction blossoming up, no feelings of wrongness at all.

He couldn’t for the life of him explain how, but somehow, he got the feeling that she wasn’t a threat to him. That he could trust her.

Was it stupid of him to trust that feeling?

“What’s your name, Sweetie?”

It took a couple of seconds before Yeonjun realised she’d asked him a question. He shook his head, racking his brain for the answer. It was good for him to have something to focus on, he realized, as he was coming dangerously close to dissociating.

“I- my,” he started, and he was met by an encouraging smile that kept him going. “Yeonjun,” he managed after some seconds.

“Yeonjun, a very pretty name. My name is Eunji. What are you doing out here at this time, Yeonjun?”

“I… I’m…” he looked around, eyes flickering here and there as if expecting to find someone watching them. He couldn’t form the words; didn’t know how to explain anything at all.

Eunji seemed to be an observant woman. “It’s okay, you don’t have to explain.” She stood in front of him, somehow having come closer without him realizing it. She stepped in front of him, looking almost like she was trying to shield him from the world, despite being much shorter than him.

Yeonjun blinked in surprise when she gently grabbed his hand, and he didn’t feel like running the other direction. What the hell was going on with his instinctive feelings today?

“It’s okay,” Eunji said. “I can tell you’re shaken up, but don’t worry, auntie will help you. Do you need to call someone?”

At the question, Yeonjun perked up, eyes meeting hers with desperation in them.

“Okay, okay, that’s good,” she said, nodding. Then, she looked around again, before turning back to Yeonjun. “I don’t know if you’re hiding from someone, but in any case, I don’t think you should stay out here looking like this.” She motioned towards his eyes, which made him briefly wonder if something was wrong with them. The thought was forgotten, however, once she continued. “I live just a few blocks away, if you want you can make the call from there?”

Normally, Yeonjun’s instincts would have screamed at him to not follow a stranger home, but with this woman every fibre in him told him that he could trust her. And perhaps that should make him even less inclined to follow her, because how could he trust her when he didn’t know what made him feel so safe with her?

But in this moment, he was too exhausted to question himself. He wanted to trust her, so he did. He nodded and allowed her to take his arm and lead him down the road.

As if she could sense he was indeed avoiding being seen, she stopped after a few steps to pull something out of her bag. He startled when she proceeded to push a piece of fabric into his arms, only looking down at it once she told him, “Wear this, it’ll attract less eyes. And it’ll hide your scent at least a little bit.”

The thing she had handed him was a hoodie. It was light grey and fortunately quite large, so it fit him okay enough once he pulled it over his head. She helped him adjust the hood over his head, pushing his hair in underneath it.

At first, he was overwhelmed by how much the hoodie smelled like her. It smelled very nice, like the smell of freshly baked bread. He briefly wondered if she worked at a bakery.

“Perfect. Now, it’s just down the road here.”

Yeonjun allowed himself to be led by this kind, small woman all the way to her house. It was ten minutes away, she told him, and the only reason Yeonjun made it all the way there was because she had been holding a strong arm around his waist the whole walk.

“This is it,” she said once they reached their goal. Yeonjun felt like he was about to collapse. It was a small house in the middle of a residential area, a house that looked like all the other houses around it. The only unique part of hers was that the garden was overflowing with flowers, making it look messy but well-lived in.

Eunji didn’t let go of Yeonjun until they were past the threshold. He stumbled a few steps forward, trying to regain his bearing, when he heard the door close behind him. Then the lock sliding into place.

A tidal wave of fear washed over him—or more like crashed into him—and he looked frantically around for an escape route. If she was locking him in, she wouldn’t let him out without a fight, and Yeonjun seriously didn’t think he could spare enough energy to even force the door open.

It seemed like Eunji noticed his distress in an instance. “It’s alright,” she said in a calm tone, reassuringly. “I’m not locking you in; I’m locking everyone else out, if that makes sense. I don’t mean to scare you, but I promise I only want to help you.”

Breathless, Yeonjun studied the woman’s face for nearly a full minute. He was too tired to really think, but he was trying to see if her expression would falter. Trying to deduce her true intentions.

She had big, brown eyes that in the yellow hallway light looked warmer than they had done outside. The way they looked at him was not unlike his own mother would look at him when he was small and had hurt himself.

Interestingly, she seemed cautious. Unsure how to approach him, maybe. It could all be a trick—she could perhaps be a really good actress—but Yeonjun felt trustworthy. Like she was genuinely trying to help him.

The pained look on her face really made him think that she was worrying over how to help him.

Funnily enough, the moment he decided to trust her, she visibly relaxed, as if she’d somehow read his mind. Perhaps she could see it in his face—his friends did sometimes tell him he was an awful liar because his face showed his true thoughts.

Eunji walked around him and gestured for him to follow her into the kitchen. “You said you wanted to call someone?” she asked as she walked, stopping by the kitchen table.

The house was small and full of life, just like it had looked from the outside. Every open area was small, like it wasn’t made for this much furniture, but Eunji had kept it tidy enough that it did not look cramped.

“Yes,” he answered her question. “If I could borrow your phone or something—”

“Of course.” She pulled it out of her pocket and unlocked it before handing it to him. Then, she nodded down the hall. “If you want some privacy, the room down the hall is empty. I’ll be right outside if you need me.”

Phone in hand, Yeonjun nodded. He looked down at the phone, for a moment forgetting how to act. Then, he raised his gaze to meet hers and said, “thank you.”

She just smiled and waved for him to go to the room.

Reluctantly, he walked down the hallway until he found a closed door. It had remnants of a large sticker, as if someone had put their name on there and had ripped it off when they left. Perhaps one of Eunji’s children?

He clicked the phone before it locked itself and went inside.

It was a small bedroom with blue walls and few furniture. By the state of it, with dust lining the bookshelf and a bed that looked like it hadn’t been slept in for ages, he’d guess that the child had long since moved away, and Eunji had simply left their room as it was. He felt a bit like he was intruding in this stranger’s room, but at the same time he supposed they wouldn’t mind.

Again, before the phone could lock itself, Yeonjun clicked on the call app and stared down at the keypad before him.

Numbers. He needed to remember a number to call. He already knew who he wanted to call. He just had to remember his number.

Fuck. What was it again?

Yeonjun had always prided himself with knowing his best friends’ numbers by heart. Soobin had had the same number since he was 14, so Yeonjun had known it for years and years.

So why now, when he actually needed it, he couldn’t remember?

No, he knew it. He did. He just needed to kickstart his memory.

Carefully, he punched in the first two digits. All phone numbers started with the same ones, so that was no win. But then his thumb moved to the right, hovering over 5 for a couple of seconds. Was that right? It felt right.

He started over, hitting the digits together, and slowly the next couple of digits came back. It was all muscle memory, he knew, and he hoped his fingers were right.

After what felt like way too long time, he had a ten digits long number on the screen. He stared at it. It looked about right. He seriously hoped it was right. If he had been capable of more thought, he would worry about his state of mind, because how could he forget his number?

Yeonjun hit the call button and slowly lifted the phone. It felt heavy in his hand suddenly, and the ringing was loud in his ears.

One ring. Two rings. Three.

Why was he not answering?

When the call went to voicemail, Yeonjun glared down at the phone. It was only half past ten in the evening, so he was sure he couldn’t have gone to sleep yet.

He called again, and this time the call was cut off before sending him to voicemail.

Oh, Yeonjun realized. Then, he groaned. Of course, he wouldn’t answer a random number calling no matter what time it was.

Very bad timing to be shy, he thought. But he didn’t have it in him to get mad. He was just tired. So, he sent a text.

Please answer. It’s me.

- yeonjun

He waited a couple of seconds to give him time to read the message. He was just about to call again when he was interrupted by an incoming call. Without the need to think, Yeonjun answered immediately.

“Hello?”

Oh, Yeonjun could cry. He had missed that voice so badly, and hearing it so suddenly, despite knowing he would get to hear it, made something break inside him.

“Soobin,” he whispered, clutching the phone hard and closing his eyes. Tears were threatening to escape.

A gasp came from the other line, and the sound of footsteps. Soobin must’ve stood up.

“Yeonjun?” Soobin sounded like he couldn’t believe his ears. Frankly, Yeonjun felt the same—it felt like he was dreaming. “Oh—oh my—Yeonjun-Hyung, is that you?”

Perhaps Yeonjun wasn’t the only one about to cry.

“It’s me,” he croaked out. “Soobin. Binnie. It’s me.”

Soobin let out a broken laugh, sounding both happy and sad at the same time. “I can’t believe it. I’ve been so worried, I… I didn’t think—Yeonjun I thought… are you okay?”

Yeonjun almost got whiplash from Soobin cutting himself off again and again, but it also made him smile. Soobin was cute.

“I’m okay,” he told him, without thinking about whether it was true or not. “For now. I’m safe.”

“Okay, good. I… sorry, I just can’t believe I’m hearing your voice,” Soobin said with a shaky laugh.

“Me too,” Yeonjun admitted. It felt a bit surreal.

Soobin took an unsteady breath. “Where—where are you? I’ll come get you, I’ll come right now, just tell me where—”

“Soobin, calm down.” Yeonjun laughed, opening his eyes. At some point, he must’ve sunk to his knees, because he found that he was on the floor. He sat back on his butt, leaning against the bed behind him to gain some comfort. When his next words came out, hot tears spilled down his cheeks. “Please come and get me. I miss you. I want to go home.”

There was rumbling noises from the other line, no doubt Soobin running round gathering whatever he needed before leaving. “Do you know where you are? Whose phone are you calling from?”

If Yeonjun strained his ears, he could just about hear Eunji moving around in the kitchen. “There was a kind lady, I’m in her house right now. She gave me her hoodie and lent me her phone.”

“Are you sure you’re safe there?”

“I think so. She genuinely seems like she wants to help me. I’ll ask her about the address, but I think it’s somewhere in my hometown.”

Soobin hummed thoughtfully and agreed to wait as Yeonjun left the room to ask Eunji about her address.

She was in the kitchen, busy with cooking something that smelled amazing on the stove. “Oh, of course,” she said once he quietly asked her. “Do you want me to tell the one you’re talking to? Or I can write it down for you.”

Yeonjun asked her to write it down, afraid that it might get forgotten or that Soobin would get it wrong if he only heard it spoken.

Once he had it written down on a napkin, he thanked her by bowing and retreated to the room. The smell of food made his stomach rumble, and the emptiness of it almost hurt.

“I’ll send the address by text,” he said, and Soobin hummed in reply. He sounded almost out of breath, and Yeonjun wondered what he was doing. Then, he heard the sound of a car swooshing by, and realized Soobin was already outside.

“I’ll get there as soon as I can, there has to be a late train I can take.”

Normally, Yeonjun would have argued that Soobin should wait to the morning, but right now he couldn’t make himself do it. He wanted – no he needed to see Soobin. The more time that passed, the more freaked out he was feeling, and he worried that he might not be able to get his mental state back if he let himself fall down that rabbit hole.

Soobin would help. He always did, when Yeonjun was on the verge of breakdown. Not that he had ever been this badly broken before, but at least having Soobin next to him would help stabilize him.

That’s what he hoped, at least.

He sent the address over text, and Soobin quickly searched for a ticked to buy. They were fortunate: the next train left in ten minutes.

Yeonjun didn’t want the call to end, so he asked Soobin how he had been. The response was a loud, almost hysterical laugh, which had him blinking in surprise.

“Sorry, I just…” Soobin sighed. “It’s so weird, you asking such a normal question out of nowhere.”

Yeonjun understood where he was coming from and smiled. “I know. I just… normal is good. I missed you, so I want to know how you’ve been.”

“Yeah.” Soobin sounded resigned now, a complete change to his previous light tone of voice. “I uh. I’ve been... okay. I’m healthy, you know? But, well… I haven’t exactly been great, with you gone.”

Yeonjun had expected to hear as much, and while it pained him to know Soobin had been hurting, it also relieved him to know that Soobin had been affected by his disappearance.

“How… how long was I—”

“It’s been a bit over five weeks. I…” Soobin said, sounding a bit breathless now, “I never lost hope, but I started to worry. The police didn’t help much, and when we tried to follow your scent, it was a dead end. We tried everything, but we couldn’t find anything. No witnesses, no scents, no leads whatsoever. What—what happened to you?”

He had known the question would come, but it was still hard to formulate an answer to it. It meant having to think about what had happened the last few weeks, and it wasn’t exactly pleasant. “I was… kidnapped?” he tried, cringing with how weird it sounded to explain it with only one word like that. It was true, he had been kidnapped, but it was more than that. He’d been fooled, drugged, and taken. He had been locked up, starved. And more. But how did he tell Soobin all that?

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it right now,” Soobin said, always so understanding.

It was tempting to just postpone the conversation until later, to not have to explain anything right now. Then it hit him that Soobin was on his way there, and that meant he would see him. Soon. He would see all the bruises, wounds and scars that hadn’t littered his body five weeks ago.

It was better to tell him, to prepare him for what he would see, Yeonjun knew. But then, wouldn’t Soobin worry too much for the upcoming hours? Ah, he didn’t know what to do.

He contemplated for a minute, before landing on telling him. Then, he just needed to figure out how to do that.

“Um, when I was on the bus to my parents’ house, I was, uh, drugged and they led me into a car and doused me in something strong smelling. Probably perfume. That’s probably why the scent disappeared.”

“They?” Soobin’s voice sounded deeper, a type of controlled anger Yeonjun had only heard a few times on him.

“I don’t know, it was a bunch of men I’d never seen before.” He took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. “They took me to a large building, locked me up, yeah you get it. Then, um…” he knew it would upset Soobin, so he hesitated for a couple of seconds before continuing. “I met the other kids who were taken before me. They were all our age. We, um…” he paused for a moment, feeling insecure when coming to this part of the story. “We were kind of… tortured? Or, um, well. They experimented on us.”

Soobin was quiet, but Yeonjun could hear his breathing speed up.

“The others,” he continued, and suddenly there was a large knot in his throat that made his voice come out all wobbly, “all of them had been there longer than me, and they helped me escape. I was the only one to get out, so I could get some help. We need to help them.”

“Oh Yeonjun,” Soobin said after a long silence, his voice broken. “I’m so sorry. Fuck. I hate it. I hate that someone did this to you. I’ll come get you, and we’ll figure everything out together, okay? We’ll find a way to help them, together.”

Yeonjun nodded, unable to say something in fear of breaking out in hysterical tears.

They were both on the verge of breakdown, it seemed, because Soobin didn’t say much after that either. They just stayed on the line, being silent together, until Soobin reached the train station.

“You’re coming soon?” he asked after Soobin announced his train was already at the station.

“I’m coming,” Soobin said firmly. “I’ll be there in a few hours. That’s no time, right?”

“Yeah,” Yeonjun breathed out. A sense of calm washed over him, and he felt his exhaustion take a hold of him again. “No time at all.”

“Yeonjun,” Soobin said. “You should get some sleep. Maybe something to eat if you can, too. Then, before you know it, I’ll be there.”

“Okay.”

“Can I tell the guys? They’ve been just as worried as me, they’ll probably want to come as well. But they’ll have to wait until tomorrow, I think.”

“Oh, uh, yeah sure.” Yeonjun’s face flushed at the thought that it wasn’t only Soobin that cared enough for him to come to his side. Then, a thought hit him, and suddenly he jerked wide awake, panic threatening to rise. “Uh, can you not tell my parents yet? I mean, um, you can tell them you’ve found me, but don’t say where I am just yet.”

“Okay? I mean, of course, if that’s what you want.”

“Yeah, I just… I want to see you first.”

“Okay,” Soobin agreed. He then sighed, sounding like he didn’t want to say what he said next, “Yeonjun, I have to get on the train and charge my phone now, so uh—”

“Oh, yes, of course,” Yeonjun sat up straight, “I’ll… try to sleep or something.”

None of them wanted to end the conversation, but it was for the best. Yeonjun’s stomach reminded him of his starving state, and Soobin should probably get some sleep on the train as well. So, after much stalling, they both said goodbye.

When the line went silent, Yeonjun stared into the room for a minute or two. Soobin was coming, he was going to be here in a few hours. It would all be okay when Soobin got there.

He barely noticed having stood up until he was closing the door behind him, carefully approaching Eunji where she was sitting by the kitchen table. He hoped his footsteps were loud enough to alert her of his presence, not knowing if he could speak right now.

Thankfully, she looked up when he came closer. Immediately, she stood and came to his side, as if thinking he needed the support. Maybe he looked like he did, because he sure felt like death right now. “I made you some food,” she said, leading him to sit in the seat she had previously been in. “It’s nothing too heavy, just some tofu soup.”

He looked down at the bowl in front of him, his mouth immediately watering. Before he grabbed the spoon, he made sure to thank her. A few minutes later, he’d basically inhaled the entire bowl. His stomach still didn’t feel full, but he didn’t tell her that.

“Gosh, you must have been starving, you poor thing,” Eunji said. She had sat down in the seat next to him, watching as if to make sure he ate every drop in the bowl. “Look at me for a second,” she asked, and he complied without much thought. “Oh, your eyes are still like that. Hmm.”

His eyes? What were his eyes like?

He looked towards the window and saw his reflection, albeit a bit blurry. It was pitch black outside now, and with the kitchen light on he could see himself quite easily. Once he did, he out of his seat to get a closer look, his eyes widening at what he saw.

It wasn’t a mirror, but he still saw himself well enough to note the change in his eyes. Instead of the brown, dark eyes he was used to, they were undoubtedly a flashing, icy blue colour now.

“Wha—why are they—?” His fingers reached up his face, close to his eyes as if he could feel what had changed to make them look like that.

“It’s okay, dear,” Eunji said, trying to calm him. “It’s completely normal. If you go through a great deal of stress, it might cause your wolf instincts to flare up. That’s why I didn’t want you out in the streets, because you never know who is out there.”

Wolf instincts.

Wait.

Oh.

The truth he hadn’t been ready to accept crashed over him like a tidal wave.

His sensitive nose, how he was hearing things he normally wouldn’t be able to hear. How he had sensed that the couple on the street had been human and why that had felt wrong—it was because he wasn’t human any longer.

Was this what Mr X had aimed to achieve, all along? Fuck, how did it even work? How could he, a human scientist, find a way to do this?

It should be impossible, yet here he was.

Okay. Yeah. Here he was. A human no more.

Hell, if that wasn’t hard to accept.

He stared at his own two blue eyes, seeing yet unseeing at the same time. It made sense, but it didn’t.

Was there even any point in trying to deny it? He wasn’t delusional. The evidence was staring him right in the eyes—literally.

He was a werewolf. And an omega, too, it seemed.

It dawned on him that Eunji was likely a werewolf too. He knew werewolves could sense – or smell? he didn’t really know – who was a werewolf and who was a human, but he couldn’t tell with her.

He was scared to ask her, too. Because if he asked, and she was a werewolf, she might realise that he wasn’t a true werewolf. Who knows what people thought about human boys turned werewolf. Not that there had ever been one before him, as far as he knew.

Would she think him a freak of nature and kick him out?

“Don’t worry too much, Yeonjun,” Eunji said, misunderstanding his worry. “It’ll go down. I’m sure when the person you were talking to before comes to get you, you’ll feel better. You’re in a safe space now.” She gently caressed his hair, once again reminding him of his mom. “Do you want some more soup?”

-

Yeonjun’s pure elation to see Soobin turned into fear as soon as he realized what was going on with him. Suddenly, he wished that time would drag on instead of going by quicker.

He didn’t know if his fears were valid or not. Soobin would be the first person he knew to see him like this, and it scared him to death, for some reason.

But it was Soobin. Out of all the people that would’ve been scary to meet, Soobin shouldn’t be one of them. Soobin was his best friend in the whole wide world. He was the one person Yeonjun had thought about calling when Eunji gave him the option, the first person Yeonjun wanted to see after escaping.

He hated how his feelings had changed so abruptly. How fear had taken a hold of him so strongly.

Soobin was a werewolf, for God’s sake, if there was anyone that would understand and accept him, it was Soobin. So, why was he so damn scared right now?

After Eunji assured him that his eyes would go back to normal once he calmed down, Yeonjun spent nearly half an hour in the bathroom, staring at the blue and willing them to turn back to brown. It was easier said than done, though, to calm down just like that. The longer he stayed in there—the longer he stared at his own eyes and his now almost skeletal face—the harder it became.

Eventually, he gave up. Maybe if he managed to go to sleep, he would wake up with his eyes normal again.

Only, Yeonjun absolutely could not fall asleep after that. He tossed and turned for a while, his chest burning with anxiety that made him wish he could throw his clothes off and jump in an ice bath to cool off. He gave up on sleeping after a while too, and the remaining time until Soobin arrived, he spent sitting on the bed, staring at the wall in the darkness.

After some time had passed, the phone in his pocket buzzed him back to alertness. He took it out with shaky hands and found a text message that both scared and elated him at the same time.

I’m getting off the train now. I’ll be there in five minutes.

Yeonjun left the room and found himself in the entrance, a few steps away from the door. Soobin had said five minutes, but to Yeonjun it felt like an eternity that dragged on as he stood there, waiting.

Then, finally, he heard the sound of a car door slamming—a taxi, perhaps?—and braced himself.

It took maybe half a minute until he sensed the presence of someone outside the door. He didn’t know how he knew it, but it was obvious to him that the person out there was Soobin. No doubt.

For some reason, Soobin seemed to hesitate. Was he as nervous as Yeonjun was right now? Why wasn’t he knocking?

It took a couple of seconds, but finally the knock came.

Yeonjun sucked in a large breath and stumbled up to the door. He fell against it, leaning his forehead into the wood as he hesitated.

“Yeonjun?” he heard, and the sound of that voice immediately made his heart speed up. The next time he spoke, his voice was louder, as if he too had come closer to the door. “Hyung, it’s me.”

“Soobin.”

Yeonjun whispered the word, but Soobin seemed to hear him anyways.

“I’m here. Will you open?”

“I just…” Yeonjun swallowed thickly and lifted his head, staring at the door as if he could see Soobin through it. “Remember what I told you? That they experimented on me?”

The sound that came from Soobin’s side made Yeonjun jump, but not exactly in fear. It was a low growl, an angry sound that might’ve made anyone else scared, but Yeonjun could sense that it wasn’t directed at him.

“Mm, okay, good,” he mumbled in response. “So just… promise me you won’t freak out?”

Soobin didn’t hesitate to answer. “Promise.”

After hearing that word, Yeonjun braced himself. Clenching his fists, he told himself it would be okay.

Then he reached for the door handle.

-

Chapter Text

Yeonjun opened the door, and the first thing he saw was his Soobin, completely enveloped by the darkness outside, but still sharp enough to be visible. They both gasped, and then Yeonjun was hit by Soobin’s scent.

Oh my God, he thought as his mouth almost started watering. Why did Soobin smell like that?

It was hard to explain it, the way that smell made him feel as it wrapped around him entirely.

It was like an aphrodisiac, lighting up Yeonjun’s insides with a strange sensation he’d never experienced before. If he hadn’t been so shocked, he might have thrown himself on Soobin right then and there just to get closer to that amazing smell.

His surprise slowly trickled away, allowing him to become more aware of the situation he was in. Suddenly, he focused on Soobin’s face, and realised the alpha was completely frozen in shock. His mouth was slightly open, and his pupils dilated in the darkness. He blinked, once. Twice.

Doubt filled Yeonjun when he couldn’t read Soobin’s reaction.

“S-Soobin,” he managed to croak, suddenly feeling very self-conscious and small before Soobin’s eyes for the first time in his life.

As if in a trance, Soobin took a step forward, lifting his hand as if he wanted to touch. His eyes went back and forth over Yeonjun’s face, taking in every detail of it. Then, he sucked in a deep breath through his nose, and Yeonjun could tell the shock developed into something deeper the longer Soobin looked at him.

“You promised,” he whispered to Soobin, feeling like he was going to throw up.

Whatever Soobin had been thinking, those words were enough to snap him out of it. The next moment, Yeonjun was wrapped up in Soobin’s strong arms. His entire being was encased in Soobin’s warmth, and it immediately silenced the building panic inside of him.

“Yeonjun,” Soobin whispered against his shoulder. His breath ran down Yeonjun’s spine, tickling him.

“Soobin,” Yeonjun answered, slightly muffled as he buried his face against Soobin’s broad chest. “You’re here.”

Soobin’s grip on him tightened for a moment, before one of his arms lifted so that he could caress the back of Yeonjun’s head. “I was so scared,” Soobin whispered, his voice breaking even more than Yeonjun’s had. “I thought it was all a dream. But it’s really you. I found you.”

Yeonjun burst into tears that were long overdue. Soobin’s words hit home. Yeonjun had been so worried, these last few hours, that he was somehow stuck in a dream and that he would wake up, and there would be no Soobin coming to save him. That he would find himself back in that dark, cold cell.

Now that Soobin was here, he became Yeonjun’s anchor, the one thing that kept him grounded in reality.

They stood there, holding each other and mumbling sweet words while their tears flowed free, for a very long time. It was what they both needed.

Yeonjun couldn’t tell who was the first to let go, but eventually he found himself in the room he’d stayed in earlier. Perhaps he had passed out, or he had been too preoccupied with crying to notice Soobin moving him.

They were sitting cross-legged on top of the bed, facing each other. Soobin was looking at his face again, and Yeonjun briefly noticed that one of his hands were held gently in Soobin’s hands.

“Your eyes,” Soobin mumbled, bringing Yeonjun back to reality. Right. Soobin knew what he was now. It was time to face it.

“She–Eunji, the lady who owns this house–she told me it’s because of the stress, that if I… if I calm down it will go away, but I don’t… I can’t make it work,” Yeonjun said, stumbling on his words quite a lot.

“She was right.” Soobin rubbed his thumb over the back of Yeonjun’s hand soothingly. “I can help you, if you want.” He looked at Yeonjun with a scared, almost shy expression all of a sudden. “Will you let me help you?”

Yeonjun didn’t know why he was even asking. “Of course,” he breathed out, wishing Soobin didn’t look so insecure.

“Okay,” Soobin said in a small voice. “Just… let me just…” he shifted in his seat, scooting even closer to Yeonjun. Their knees were touching, and Yeonjun let Soobin pull him into a half-embrace, one hand at the back of his head. “Here,” he continued, carefully pushing Yeonjun’s head towards his own neck. “Just put your nose here and breathe in. It’ll help you calm down.”

Yeonjun did as he was told. At first, he could only smell Soobin’s amazing smell. It was a mix between something sweet, like vanilla, and something sharp that he couldn’t put his finger on, something like incense. It was so Soobin. It was perfect.

After his initial reaction to Soobin’s scent, he was hit by something entirely different. As if it went through his nose and directly into his blood system, Yeonjun was filled by a sensation of complete bliss. It was almost like a drug, but unlike the times he had actually been drugged, this time he wasn’t afraid. This time, it felt completely right.

“Oh,” he let out as his entire body turned to mush. He kept his nose digging into Soobin’s neck, breathing in repeatedly. It was like a drug that he couldn’t get enough of. Even when Soobin started pushing him off, Yeonjun tried to stay glued to Soobin’s neck. But of course, Soobin was stronger.

“Yeonjun,” Soobin said, finally managing to push Yeonjun back to see his face. Yeonjun’s eyes were closed, but he could feel Soobin staring at him for a few seconds, before nudging his arm. “Let me see if it worked.”

Yeonjun scrunched his nose up before he understood what Soobin was asking for. He opened his eyes slowly and found Soobin smiling at him.

“It worked?” Yeonjun asked, feeling a bit like he was up in the clouds. When Soobin nodded, he added, “What was that? How did you do that?”

Soobin blushed. “You know about pheromones, right? It’s um, like chemicals we can send out to, kinda, influence other’s emotions. This one was supposed to calm you down.”

“Oh,” Yeonjun nodded, carefully digesting Soobin’s words. “Yeah, you’ve mentioned it before. I... I guess I never understood how it worked, before.”

Soobin nodded. Silence settled over them for a moment, and Soobin looked down at their laps, where he was gently massaging Yeonjun’s hand. For a while longer, he stayed quiet, but Yeonjun could tell there was something on his mind.

“So...”

Yeonjun already knew what he was going to say. “I’m an omega.”

Soobin’s eyes flickered up to meet his for a second before going back to watch their hands. “Yeah.

Yeonjun sucked in an unsteady breath. “It’s crazy, right? I—I feel like I should be freaking out, but it doesn’t even feel real. How—is this even real?”

“It’s real alright,” Soobin said, and something akin to pain flashed across his face before he sucked in a deep breath through his mouth.

“I don’t really know what to do now,” Yeonjun admitted, suddenly feeling a little short of breath. He found himself grimacing as his thoughts raced. “Is it gonna go away? What if it’s permanent? Do I... what if I have to live like this my whole life?”

It was silent for two seconds before Soobin extracted his hands from Yeonjun abruptly. “I don’t have the answers for you, Yeonjun,” he said, his tone suddenly cold and emotionless.  

Yeonjun looked up, surprised and trying to understand what Soobin was thinking, only to see a hurt expression cross his best friend’s face. Suddenly, his own words poured over him like an ice bucket emptied over his head. He sucked in a quick gasp, horrified by the thought of Soobin thinking he was hating on being a werewolf like Soobin.

“I—Soobinnie, I didn’t mean it like...” Yeonjun looked down in shame. “I’m just… I’m scared. My body feels weird–different–and right now I just... I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to hate on your kind or anything.”

Gentle fingers dragged over Yeonjun’s hands before Soobin was taking them in his own again. The relieved gasp Yeonjun let out when he looked up in time to see Soobin’s expression soften was embarrassing, to say the least, but he didn’t have time to register that feeling before Soobin pulled him into a quick hug.

For a moment, time stopped for Yeonjun. It felt like they were both holding their breaths before they let go of each other and leaning back.

“It’s okay. I get it,” Soobin said. “It’s only fair that you’re afraid, I would have been too. Sorry for overreacting, I just... it felt like you were upset about... being like me, you know?”

They sighed in unison. “I don’t think I’m upset because of that but... I don’t know what to think. It’s not that I hate being like you but... I don’t know how to be a werewolf. I don’t know what these changes to my body will do, or how to react to anything. Everything... smells so much.”

He caught Soobin’s surprised look, and for a beat they just stared into each other’s eyes. The next, they burst out laughing.

They went at it for a couple of minutes, bursting out laughing again every time they shared a look, because this whole situation was just too absurd.

It was Soobin who managed to calm down first, leaning back to lie on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Even if it totally feels like I’m dreaming right now,” he said, tilting his head to the side so he could look at Yeonjun, “I’m just glad that you’re alright, Hyung. It was... hard, to say the least, these last few weeks. We didn’t know if you were still alive, and the other boys had been gone for months with no trace so I—I was so worried.”

Yeonjun played with Soobin’s hair, but his hand stilled the moment the other boys were mentioned. An icy feeling of dread washed over him in an instant. Eyes widening, he straightened in his seat and looked down at Soobin.

“Soobin. Shit, the boys, we—we need to help them. Shit, I’m so stupid, I can’t believe I forgot, we have to get them out, what if something happens and I’ve just—”

“Shhh,” Soobin hushed him, having quickly sat up and wrapped an arm around Yeonjun the moment he started freaking out. “It’s okay. We’re gonna help. I already called the police, when I was on the train.” Soobin’s thumb gently ran circles over the skin on Yeonjun’s arm. “I didn’t know many details, so I told them what I knew, and they said they would need you to tell them as much as you can, tomorrow. Right now, there’s not much we can do, but as soon as the guys come tomorrow, we’re going straight to the station, okay?”

Yeonjun looked into Soobin’s eyes, searching them for any dishonesty, but he could already tell that Soobin was being completely honest with him. “We’re gonna help,” he repeated, and Soobin nodded reassuringly.

“It’s just a few more hours, okay? The boys will be okay, I promise you.”

Yeonjun bit his lip, trying to not let himself argue that Soobin couldn’t know that. That it was stupid of him to promise. But he had to believe it, for his own sake, or he might run back out there right now.

He couldn’t understand how he had suddenly forgotten all about the urgency of the situation the moment he had found some comfort. How stupid could he be?

What if the scientists had hurt the guys already? What if they’d killed them all as a punishment?

Had Yeonjun left them to die?

“It’s okay Hyung,” Soobin said, hushing him again when he saw how Yeonjun’s thoughts were running wild. He moved Yeonjun with the arm wrapped around him, so that he could face him better as he seemed to get an idea. “You know what, we can call the police right now. It’s the middle of the night, sure, but if you give them more information now, there will be less to do in the morning.”

Yeonjun nodded even before Soobin was finished speaking.

“Okay, good,” Soobin said, “I’ll call them, and then you can speak to them.” Soobin scooted a few inches away from Yeonjun as he pulled out his phone and without hesitation pressed the numbers to the Busan police station. As soon as they picked up, he started filling them in on the situation, that he had called them earlier and that he had more information to give them now.

Before Yeonjun knew it, the phone was handed over to him.

The police officer on the other end was very helpful and led the conversation, asking questions to get Yeonjun to tell him everything he could remember about the place—where it was located, how big it was, how many people were working there, what hours they were usually active; everything.

It was almost like an interrogation, and even though it made Yeonjun uncomfortable to talk about it all so soon, he pushed through it for his friends’ sake.

“Thank you Yeonjun,” the officer said when Yeonjun fell quiet, not having anything else to say. “I believe we have enough to piece together a plan of operation, but we would still like you to come into the station in the morning to discuss it with us. If the situation is as grave as you say, we need to act as fast as possible.”

“Why can’t we do it right now?” Yeonjun asked, having had that thought the entire conversation.

The officer hummed. “Unfortunately, for an operation this large—considering the size of the building you’ve described and the number of personnel—we cannot gather a big enough troop in the middle of the night, so we’re going to have to work as quick as possible in the morning.”

Yeonjun thought it sounded sketchy. Didn’t police work night shift? But then again, the police worked to help people, so why would they postpone this mission just for the sake of it?

He just needed to trust the police. Getting riled up and angry at them as well would not exactly do him any good.

After the conversation, he realized that was starting to feel numb, as if relaying everything about the place he’d been held in drained him of both his feelings and his energy.

At some point, he’d handed the phone back to Soobin, but he’d been too out of it to notice whether Soobin had continued speaking to the officer or if the conversation ended after that.

He became aware of himself and his surroundings a while later, when Soobin was gently trying to pull his shirt over his head.

“Soobin what—” Yeonjun, not realizing what was going on, instantly reacted. He grabbed Soobin’s hands, hard, and forced them to stop moving. “What are you doing?!”

Soobin’s mouth formed an ‘o’ shape in surprise. “I told you, I brought some clean clothes for you to change into. But if you don’t want to, then…”

He gently pulled Soobin’s hands away from his shirt, and as soon as it fell back down over his stomach again, he felt a sense of relief flow through him. It wasn’t that he was shy or didn’t want Soobin to see him naked—hell, they’d seen each other naked thousands of times, in locker rooms or at home when they’d been too lazy to care about what the other was seeing.

At least, normally he didn’t care about showing off his body to Soobin.

But now, he barely even knew himself what the condition of his body was. He’d been through so much pain, and he knew it would hit Soobin if he got to see real proof of that, even if he’d heard the story about it.

For now, he wanted to live in a world where Soobin didn’t look at him like a beaten and broken-down animal. He could survive another day in these horrible, smelling clothes, if he was spared the look of pity from Soobin.

“Not now, Binnie,” he whispered, hoping Soobin would understand. “Thank you for thinking of me, but I can’t… not now.”

Soobin smiled defeatedly. He seemed to understand, on some level. “Okay.” He gulped, his eyes scanning over Yeonjun’s face for several seconds. Likely, he was trying to read Yeonjun’s mind from the expression he was showing. “Let’s just sleep then, Hyung.”

He opened his arms, and Yeonjun knew instantly what it meant. They met in an embrace, and then Soobin was leaning down on the bed, giving Yeonjun access to his chest as his pillow for the night.

Despite it being late, Yeonjun had no hopes of falling asleep. There was just too much going on in his head, even if his body was utterly exhausted. He stared up at the ceiling, focusing entirely on the sound of Soobin’s heart beating where his ear was leaning against the alpha’s chest.

Five, maybe ten minutes passed in utter silence. Then, suddenly, gentle fingers wound their way into his hair, massaging his scalp in the most soothing way possible. “Sleep, hyung,” Soobin whispered, clearly understanding that Yeonjun would have trouble doing so. “You’re gonna need the rest.”

Yeonjun sighed. “I know. I just… I don’t know how to relax.”

“You just gotta trust that everything’s gonna be alright,” Soobin mumbled above Yeonjun’s head. “The first step was you escaping, and now you’re getting help, just as you said you would. Tomorrow, we’ll get them out, with the help of the police.”

“Trust…” Yeonjun mumbled. Trust was hard. It had already been too much time, and with every passing minute he worried more and more about his friends’ safety.

It could already be too late. They could all already be dead, and it wouldn’t matter if they left right now or ten hours from now.

Or it could be just fine. The scientists could’ve just increased the and continued doing their experiments as if nothing ever happened.

There was no way for him to know which scenario was the truth until they went in there to save them.

He had two options right now. Either he could worry that they were too late, and that his friends would be dead when they found them; or he could hang onto hope. Hope that his friends were still alive, and that the scientists didn’t plan on hurting them in the next couple of hours or so.

Perhaps Soobin was right. He just had to trust that it would turn out alright. The other option would just break him down and ensure that he wouldn’t be on his best tomorrow, which would endanger his friends’ lives even more.

So Yeonjun decided to trust. To hold onto hope. It might be naïve of him, but for now it was the only thing he could do.

-

Early next morning, only a few hours after they’d talked to the police, Yeonjun was awoken by the morning light hitting his eye. He was surprised to find he had managed to fall asleep somehow, and even more so when he realised that he was completely entwined with Soobin. The alpha’s arms were wrapped tightly around him, keeping him firmly in place, and one of his own legs had inched its way in between Soobin’s.

The moment he realized, there was no point of contact between them that didn’t feel like his skin was on fire.

It was the smell of toast and eggs that got them stumbling out of bed. Yeonjun couldn’t tell if Soobin was embarrassed over the position they were in when he woke up, but he was not going to ask him about it.

In the kitchen, they found Eunji filling two plates with large portions of eggs and bacon. She looked up, startled at the sound of their footsteps, and froze when she saw Soobin.

Eunji had been asleep when Soobin arrived, Yeonjun suddenly remembered. He had told her that his friend would come, but maybe he failed to point out that he would arrive during the night.

Thankfully, she welcomed him into her home with open arms and immediately moved to pull out a third plate for him to eat off.

They ate quickly and in silence. They hadn’t discussed today’s time plan, but Yeonjun assumed they would leave for the police station as soon as possible. Wait, had Soobin said that their friends would come to pick them up in the morning?

“Oh, yeah, Kai texted me when they left,” Soobin answered when Yeonjun asked about it. “That was, like, 3 and a half hours ago.”

Yeonjun did the maths in his head. He looked to the clock on the wall, which said it was only 8 (how damn early had their friends woken up to start driving?) and realized that they should be there in half an hour. Less if they were driving like lunatics, which he suspected might be the case if they were in a hurry.

“Oh.” Yeonjun bit his lip. “Did you, um… did you tell them…?”

“Did I tell them what?” Soobin titled his head to the side, frowning lightly. Yeonjun glanced up from his plate anxiously.

“About me, being… you know.” He glanced at Eunji, trying to indicate what he meant without saying it.

“Oh,” Soobin said. “No. I didn’t know last night, so I just told them the address.”

Okay. Yeonjun digested his words for a moment.

His friends were on the way, and they had no idea what state they would find Yeonjun in. On one hand, the thought that they wouldn’t know was nice, but he knew that Taehyun and Beomgyu would immediately notice the moment they saw him, just the way Soobin had done last night. Perhaps it was better if they knew, if they wouldn’t have to go through that shock of seeing him that Soobin had experienced.

“Do you want me to tell them before they arrive?” Soobin asked, surprising Yeonjun by pulling him out of his thoughts. “I can call Tae.”

“You’d do that?” Yeonjun bit his lip, eyes lighting up with gratitude.

Soobin nodded, and Yeonjun saw him pull up Taehyun’s contact on his phone. “If it makes it easier, of course.” When Yeonjun nodded, Soobin stood up and excused himself to Eunji.

Yeonjun watched him with his eyes until he was out of the kitchen. Even then, he strained his ears, only to realise that Soobin went as far as stepping outside, the door falling shut quietly behind him.  

He focused on finishing his food, and his mind wandered from topics like Kai and Taehyun and how they would react to seeing him, to Juyeon and Chanhee and what they might be going through right now. Without realizing it, he started chewing on his bottom lip as he couldn’t help but let his worries grow.

It took a couple of minutes before Soobin returned. Eunji had slipped out of the room while Soobin was out, saying something about laundry—but Yeonjun was sure she only wanted to give them some space—so when Soobin returned it was awfully quiet in the room.

“They’re almost here,” Soobin said, sitting down in his seat next to Yeonjun. His hand landed on Yeonjun’s thigh, the way it almost always did when they sat next to each other. Normally, Yeonjun wouldn’t have reacted much, being accustomed to the feeling; today, he felt like he might burst into flames from how sensitive he was.

Soobin’s eyes flickered over to Yeonjun’s face, and that only made Yeonjun burn even hotter, his face surely lighting up like a stop sign. Thankfully, it seemed like Soobin didn’t understand where Yeonjun’s strong feelings were coming from and misunderstood them as worry.  

“Hey. It’s just the guys. There’s nothing to worry about.” He smiled that dimpled smile of his, the one that always made Yeonjun feel safe and at home. “We’ll get in the car and go straight to the police, ‘kay? It won’t be much longer before we’ll get your friends out.”

Yeonjun nodded jerkily. The mention of his friends—both the ones in the car on their way there and the ones still stuck in hell—was enough for him to let go of any dirty thoughts, at least, although he had to suck in a few deep breaths to calm himself. 

“Yeah,” Yeonjun mumbled in response, sounding a bit breathless to his own ears.

They sat in silence for another minute or two, Soobin chewing on the last pieces of bacon from his plate.

“Can I ask something,” Yeonjun said as a thought from last night came back to him. Soobin nodded, waiting for him to continue. “Is Eunji a werewolf too?”

Not having expected that question, Soobin’s eyebrows shot up. Then, he smiled. “Yes, she is. She’s an omega.”

Pursing his lips, Yeonjun nodded. “How can you tell? Is it something with her smell?”

“Her scent, you mean?” Soobin teased, earning himself an eyeroll. “Yeah, kind of. Others of our kind smell much more, and we have much more individual scents. Humans all smell kind of the same. There’s also just an overall feeling, like you can sense who’s a werewolf or not. It’s a bit hard to explain…”

“Oh. That’s interesting,” Yeonjun said. “Does that mean I smell different now? If all humans smell the same.”

“Um,” Soobin said, and to Yeonjun’s surprise, a tiny blush appeared on his face. “I mean, kind of? It still smells mostly like you, like the same individual smell, but it’s much more intense. And I mean, I can tell you’re, well—”

“A werewolf?”

“Yeah,” Soobin answered, a bit breathlessly.

Yeonjun nodded. He had guessed as much. He hadn’t had much time to think about all this, to wonder about what his own scent was, but whenever his mind wandered back to the topic of his omeganess, he got really curious what he might smell like.  

The sound of a loud horn from outside the house startled them both, and Yeonjun was on his feet in a moment’s notice. “Is that them?” he wondered, looking to Soobin for confirmation.

Soobin checked his phone. “Yeah, must be.” They shared a look, and Soobin held out his hand for Yeonjun to grab, if he wanted to.

Without an ounce of hesitation, Yeonjun intertwined his hand with Soobin’s, squeezing firmly to reassure both himself and Soobin.

“It’ll be alright,” Soobin told him as they approached the door, and Soobin went to answer his phone that had started ringing. After telling Taehyun that he could see the car outside, and that they were at the right place, he could hear the three of them running down the steps to the front door.

Yeonjun barely had time to open the door before he had two boys throwing themselves at him. Kai was first, and with his long legs and uncoordinated feet they would have toppled over if it wasn’t for Taehyun coming to stabilize them next.

“Hyung!” they both cried as they buried their faces into Yeonjun. It almost felt like they were vibrating, and it took Yeonjun a second to realize that it was because they were crying.

The tears immediately started flowing down his own cheeks when he realized, and he breathed in the new, strong scents of them both and felt reassured in a way he wouldn’t have been when he was human. Somehow, despite this being the first time he smelled them like this, their scents were so familiar that it filled him with a feeling of utter bliss to have their arms around him.

“Hi,” he said, speaking against someone’s arm, not wanting to let go of them yet but feeling the need to say something.

Taehyun pinched his arm, causing him to yelp in surprise. Yeonjun leaned his head back slightly, until he could see both their face. “Hi?” Taehyun asked, his voice a mix between teasing and disbelieving.

They shared a look, and as if they had all gone insane all at once, they burst out in hysterical laughter.

When the laughing and crying stopped several minutes later, Taehyun and Kai stepped back a little, but still not letting go of their Hyung. Yeonjun felt very content with that, the feeling of their arms wrapped around him—one around his shoulder and the other around his waist—made him feel very safe.

Turning around to face Soobin, Yeonjun’s eyebrows shot up as he realized there was one more person in the room with them.

“Hey,” Beomgyu said, flashing a small smile at Yeonjun the moment their eyes met.

“Hey,” Yeonjun shot back. He tried to sound normal instead of strained like he felt. Considering his and Beomgyu’s relationship before he was kidnapped, he had no idea how to act right now. 

To his surprise, Beomgyu suddenly held out his hand in between them, his smile growing a bit more confident. Yeonjun blinked, having a hard time registering that this was really happening.

He glanced at Soobin, as if trying to get confirmation that this was really happening. Soobin just smiled and nodded.

Reluctantly, Yeonjun took Beomgyu’s hand and shook it. He expected that to be all and was shocked when Beomgyu pulled him closer and gave him a polite sideways hug.

Kai and Taehyun’s arms around him slipped away, but Yeonjun barely noticed, as all he could focus on suddenly was Beomgyu’s lips near his ear. For a moment, he expected the other omega to say something vile, and he was once again shocked when he heard him say, “Welcome back. If you ever need help being an omega, you can always come to me, okay?”

When Beomgyu let go of him and stepped back, Yeonjun found himself stunned. He blinked several times before managing to let out a small “thank you.”

After that, they didn’t waste any time getting into the car, Taehyun behind the wheel and Yeonjun in the shotgun seat. They didn’t need to say much, as it was already clear that they were going to the police station.

The drive was not very long, only ten minutes or so, but Yeonjun felt like he was gonna start bouncing out of his seat if they didn’t get there sooner. It didn’t help that the car was completely silent, no one saying anything and no background music playing. Part of him wondered if Taehyun turned the radio off for his sake, thinking that the sounds would tick his new senses off somehow. Instead, it was the opposite; the lack of sounds threatened to tip him over the edge towards a breakdown.

When they finally reached the police station, Yeonjun let Soobin do the talking. It wasn’t long before they were taken to a different room, where they would be speaking to the chief of the police about how to proceed.

Their first meeting with the chief was absolutely useless, in Yeonjun’s eyes. They didn’t speak at all about the plan for how they would get the other boys out, but instead the man was telling Yeonjun all about the process of reporting and how he would have to have his story in check before going through the entire process—Yeonjun stopped listening after a while.

“So, how are we gonna get my friends out?” Yeonjun asked suddenly, interrupting the never-ending monologue the chief was having. “Isn’t that why we’re here? So that you can send someone in to get them out, right?”

The chief looked mildly offended at being interrupted, but he seemed to calm himself when he noticed the edge to Yeonjun’s voice. “Yes. I was getting to that. We have been calling in every police officer in the vicinity, but we of course need to organize our plan before we go in. Now that you’re here, we can finally do that.”

Great, Yeonjun thought to himself. Why didn’t we start with that?

After that, the chief asked them to follow him, and Yeonjun nearly let out a relieved groan at that. He led them down the hall, to another bigger room, where they found a few more people inside.

They introduced themselves, but after that, they went straight to business, and for that Yeonjun was thankful. No more stalling.

One of the police officers—a woman in her thirties—asked him to point out the building on a map, to see if the building they had in mind from his description last night was the correct one. Now, Yeonjun wasn’t entirely sure which building it was, but after seeing satellite images of the area, he found one building that he thought was the right one.

It was the same one the police had in mind, thankfully. After confirming it, one of the officers left the room to get a blueprint of the building.

The blueprint map was placed on the table, and Yeonjun spent a few minutes looking at it to find familiar locations in the building.

“I think this is where I escaped,” Yeonjun said, leaning over the table and pointing at a place on the map. “This room is empty, but this one next to it is the one where they used to do the… experiments on us. I managed to escape because we made a plan and the… the others created a distraction.” He recalled the sounds and couldn’t help but wonder what had happened right then, after the guards had noticed his disappearance.

Shaking his head, Yeonjun forced those thoughts away for now. He needed to focus if they were going to get somewhere with this whole thing. “We were on the third floor. The place where they kept us is around here, I think,” he pointed it out on the map, a long corridor which made sense to be the one they’d been staying in. “I don’t know how many cells there were, it was a bit hard to see because they kept us in darkness most of the time. But I know there were ten of us in there.”

“And all of these people were kids?” the female officer asked, her face aggravated.

Yeonjun nodded. “Well, my age or younger. There were two guys I talked to the most, who were a year older than me.”

Juyeon and Chanhee, he thought. He hoped they were okay.

“Okay, we need you to point out any entrances and every door that you know what’s behind it,” the chief said, turning everyone’s attention towards him.

Nodding, Yeonjun racked his brain and pointed. “Here’s the hallway we were led down. The guards, they sometimes came from down here,” he pointed at the other side of the hallway. “I never got a glimpse of the inside, but I could hear them talking whenever the door opened. I’d say that’s where they all gathered when they weren’t working with us, or whatever.”

He gazed down at the map, thinking for a while longer. It was all hazy in his mind, because most of the time he’d spent in there he had been either drugged or messed up by exhaustion and pain.

Still, he knew he could do better than this. “There’s…” he tried to find it on the map, “this room the others talked about that I never saw. It was at the end of this corridor, I think. Juyeon said they brought him there a couple of times, but I was always brought to the same room.”

“Juyeon?” Soobin asked from just behind Yeonjun. 

“He was in the cell next to mine,” Yeonjun explained, remembering the first time he saw Juyeon’s hand through the window between their rooms. “He’s the one who’s a year older than me. We talked a lot.”

He has two younger sisters waiting for him, he thought, feeling sad at just the thought of him. We need to save him.

Everyone nodded solemnly as they took in Yeonjun’s words. None of them could imagine how it had been in there, but they seemed to understand how much his time in there had affected him.

The officers continued asking questions, pointing out interesting spots on the map and giving suggestions of what they could do. After some time, they seemed to realize that there wasn’t much more Yeonjun could tell them, and at that point, they told the five of them that they could go for a break while the adults talked.

Yeonjun didn’t even bother to argue that they were literally adults as well, feeling like he needed the break. He all but stumbled out of the room, his friends coming close behind him. They made it to what must have been the lunchroom, which was thankfully deserted at the moment.

“That felt like an interrogation,” Beomgyu said, glancing back at the room they just came from.

Sighing, Yeonjun nodded. He felt completely drained, too tired to even answer.

“What do you think’s gonna happen now?” Kai asked no one in particular.

“They have to figure out what forces they can put together to go in there,” Taehyun guessed, mentioning the policeman that was also one of Taehyun’s dad’s closer friends. “Maybe they can send someone in to take out the scientists before the rest of the troops go in, like with gas or something, or they’ll—”

While Taehyun speculated about what the plan might be, Yeonjun started slowly zoning out. He found himself worrying about what would happen, if it was really a good idea to let the police handle it all when they didn’t know anything about the situation inside that building.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust the police to succeed, but just the thought of a whole battalion of police officers moving into that building like a force of nature made him feel queasy. He could just imagine how it could go wrong, how Mr X would see them coming and shut down the operation before the police even had the chance to enter.

The risk was just too big. The more he thought about it, the more certain he became that the plan would fail.

He couldn’t have that.

“I need to go in,” Yeonjun heard himself saying just as the thought hit him.

Looking up, he realized that he had interrupted the others mid-conversation, but they had all heard him loud and clear judging by the expression on their faces.

“W-what did you say?” Soobin asked, as if he couldn’t believe it.

Yeonjun thought it through for a moment, and came to the conclusion that this was the only way. Their safest bet, if they wanted all the boys to come out alive.

“I’m going in,” he said, with more confidence this time. “I need to. Like a mole, or—or something. I don’t know how yet, but I need to go in and make sure they don’t hurt the guys. If the police storm from the outside, they’re gonna be alerted and… I can’t risk it. I won’t let them hurt the guys.”

“But Hyung, you’re—”

“You just got out! It’s too risky, what if you—”

“I know it’s risky,” Yeonjun said, cutting off both Kai and Soobin, “but I can’t just wait around on the outside while someone else try to save my friends, not when I don’t think it’s going to work.” He looked at Soobin, who was pleading with his eyes, asking Yeonjun to change his mind. “I think I need to do this.”

He stood from his seat, startling his friends as he started moving back towards the meeting room they were previously in. Before he reached it, someone forcibly grabbed his arm to try and stop him.

It turned out to be Kai. “Hyung, please,” he pleaded, “don’t. We don’t want to lose you again.”

The pain in Kai’s voice was enough to make him paus, but only for a brief second. He looked back and found all four of them looking at him with pained expressions.

Soobin’s gaze on him felt especially heavy. Yeonjun understood, he truly did, and he felt guilty for making his friends worry for him. But he was determined to do this, and no puppy eyes from their side would win him over.

“You won’t,” he responded, eyes finding Kai again. “I’m not gonna fail.”

“How are you so sure?” Taehyun asked, sounding smaller than Yeonjun could remember hearing him sound like in years. “How can you know that? You’re risking your own life, Hyung!”

Smiling, Yeonjun shook his head. “This is the safest option; I can feel it. If we do it any other way, they’ll notice. They’re going to be on high alert since my escape, so it’s too risky to send the entire force in at once. But if I go, I can convince them that I haven’t found help, and they’ll slip up. I’m sure of it. And then the police will back me up.”

“Hyung—” Soobin tried, but Yeonjun shook his head again.

“I’ve decided,” he said. Gently, he nudged Kai’s arm off him and turned to the door.

Now he just needed to convince the rest of the team to follow his plan.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

It had been less than a day since his escape, and Yeonjun was about to go back in.

If he hadn’t been running on adrenaline since the moment he was dropped off a few blocks away from the building in question, he might have started to freak out from the fear. Despite knowing that they had planned everything out down to the smallest detail, he was still scared to fuck it up.

The only thing that kept him afloat was the prospect of being able to save his friends.

Dressed in the same disgusting clothes that he’d been wearing for the past 5 weeks, Yeonjun stumbled down the streets, hopefully succeeding in looking disoriented and starved. He just hoped that those people were naïve enough to believe that he hadn’t gotten further than a few blocks away since his escape.

He both felt and looked like a zombie—considering how stressful the last few hours of planning had been—which was probably to his benefit. He couldn’t look well rested and put together, or they might get suspicious. And right now, he couldn’t afford any suspicion.

Come on, Mr X, I know you’re looking for me, he thought as he walked along the streets, his eyes darting around rapidly in search for anyone he recognized. Where are you?

Once again, he wondered what had happened after the scientists noticed he was gone. Had they sent someone out after him? Had it taken them a while to realise he was gone?

How angry had they been about losing their newest lab subject, once they realised?

Eww, Yeonjun thought. He hated the mere thought that the scientists viewed them as lab rats, nothing more. Not human beings. Just means to an end.

Never had he hated someone in life as much as he hated those guys. The scientists and the guards. Mr X most of all.

He stumbled around for way too long for his liking. The streets were eerily empty, looking like some kind of dystopian novel. How could there not be even a single person out on the streets in the middle of the day?

Regret filled him when his stomach roared and clenched in emptiness. Maybe he should have eaten something before leaving. The prospect of putting anything in his mouth had seemed impossible before, his appetite long gone, but now he wished he had forced himself. It did not serve well to get distracted by hunger when his mission was so important.

The closer he got to the building, the less confident he felt. How suspicious wouldn’t it be if he walked all the way back there after just having escaped? Would they realize his plan and not take him inside to see his friends? Would they kill him, then?

No, he knew they wouldn’t kill him. He was their first successful subject, wasn’t he?

It had dawned on him yesterday that the goal of their whole operation must’ve been to create lab-made werewolves. And somehow, they had succeeded. Yeonjun was proof of that.

He was sure that if he just made Mr X aware of that, he’d be sold on keeping him alive. There was no way that man would pass on the chance to study his first successful case.

When he came as close as a block away from the building he’d been held at, his attentive eyes noticed cameras that couldn’t have been there before. They were very big and obvious, and even though it had been dark when he escaped, he was sure he wouldn’t have missed them.

Knowing they likely could see him now, even if there was a chance that no one was watching in that moment, Yeonjun upped his exhausted act, stumbling on his feet and falling over. He held his head in his hands, taking deep breaths where he sat on the kerb before forcing himself back on his feet.

After that, it didn’t take long until he noticed a black van approaching from down the road. It looked the same as the one that he’d been thrown into when he’d been kidnapped so many weeks ago now. 

Four men in black clothing got out of the van, and they were on him in seconds. Yeonjun didn’t see all their faces, but he recognized the ones he saw as the guards that had been handling him in there. Like the first time, he was doused in perfume to hide his scent. Unlike last time, however, his reaction was much more aggressive.

With how extremely sensitive nose his nose was now, the smell of roses overwhelmed him, choking him. It wasn’t just his nose, however; all his senses seemed to react to the strong smell.

His vision blurred, and he felt like he was going to be sick. The once pleasant smell now made him gag, and his skin felt like it was vibrating.

He had never experienced anything like this, not even when he was being drugged out of his mind. The sensory overload had him slipping in and out of consciousness during the short car ride. It was so bad that he barely noticed the van was moving at all.

They must’ve come to a stop, because suddenly Yeonjun was being grabbed and thrown out so harshly that he fell and scraped his hand on the asphalt in the process.

Next, the hands pulled him to his feet and dragged him into the building, not caring enough to give him the option to walk himself. The corridors they were passing were unfamiliar to him, but his vision was still going in and out so he couldn’t be completely sure if what he was seeing was trustworthy or not.

Only when they seemed to have reached their destination—a simple door at the end of a corridor Yeonjun was sure he’d never entered before—did they let him get to his feet. Yeonjun wanted to complain about the rough handling, feeling a similar kind of rage as he’d felt on his first day in the building, but he held his tongue.

One of the guards reached for the door handle, and as soon as the door opened, he was kicked in the back so hard that it sent him stumbling and falling in the middle of the room.

“Well, well, well,” a familiar voice spoke from above him, and Yeonjun didn’t have to lift his head to know who it belonged to. “Look what the cat dragged in.”

The room was small, a simple office with little furniture and no decorations on the wall. In front of where he was kneeling there was a desk, and behind it was Mr X.

“I’ve got to admit,” Mr X said, and his eyes met Yeonjun’s as he stood from his chair and rounded the table, “that I didn’t expect to see you again, boy.”

Yeonjun wanted to snort as he realized that Mr X didn’t even know his name, but he was too nauseous to do much of anything.

The man crouched in front of him, and suddenly his face was very close to Yeonjun’s. “I’m surprised you came back here, after all the effort you and your little friends put into your little escape mission.” His breath hit Yeonjun square in the face, and it didn’t exactly make his nausea any better. Instinctively, Yeonjun started to recoil, only for Mr X to grab him at the back of his neck with such force that he could feel the bruises starting to form already. “Tell me boy. Why did you come back around here? Do you not have anywhere to go? No family to go back to?”

Yeonjun stared at him with venom in his eyes, forcing the rage inside of him to come to the surface. Now was the time for him to pull out all his acting skills to ensure he steered this situation in the right direction. He had gone over this for an hour with his friends, and he trusted himself to nail it.

“It’s because of you!” he screamed right in Mr X’s face. “You did this to me, you’re the reason I can’t go back home!” He thrusted forward, thrashing his arms out and managing to push the man off balance. “It’s your fault!”

Mr X stumbled back with wide eyes when Yeonjun’s eyes turned the unmistakable luminescent blue colour. Even if Yeonjun couldn’t feel them change, he knew he had succeeded when he saw Mr X’s reaction.

“Remarkable,” the scientist exclaimed, moving once again closer to Yeonjun, as if he completely forgot that Yeonjun had just been violent. He grabbed Yeonjun’s chin and turned his head left and right. He looked like a kid on Christmas morning, a delighted look on his face.

Yeonjun stared at him with absolute disgust. When the man straightened himself and walked away, Yeonjun shivered from just the thought of those hands having touched him.

Unsurprisingly, Mr X started talking to himself, mumbling about injections and reactive components in excitement. He kept going for a while, seemingly trying to put together all the scientific details of his experiment, until he abruptly stopped pacing and turned to the guards.

“Take him to the lab,” he ordered. “The others can wait.” He waved a hand dismissively and turned to look at his desk, where Yeonjun noticed there was a bunch of papers spread out. “I’ll be there shortly.”

Yeonjun was grabbed by the shirt and forcibly pulled to his feet. The next thing he knew, he was once again being pulled out into the corridor – at least this time, they let him walk.

It didn’t take long for him to recognize where they were going, as one turn led them into the same corridor that he remembered being led down every other day back then. They soon reached a door, leading to the same room – same lab – from which Yeonjun had escaped.

Instinctively, his eyes fell on the door on the opposite wall, thoughts about escaping automatically coming to him. There was no way they would’ve let that door stay unlocked after his escape. It didn’t matter much to him though, as his whole purpose for being there was literally to get caught.

No use in escaping now.

“Yeonjun?”

He jerked violently at the unexpected voice coming from inside the room, only to realize that he recognized it very well. In a split second, his eyes flitted across the room, his gaze landing on what looked to be two doctors’ chairs having taken the place of the bed Yeonjun remembered being there before.

And in the chairs were Chanhee and Heesung.

“No,” Heesung said when their eyes met. “No, no, no, no—”

Chanhee’s head fell back against the headrest in defeat. “Fuck, we’re dead,” he muttered, probably not with the intention for them to hear, but Yeonjun’s enhanced ears picked it up easily.

It pained him to see his friends so utterly defeated, but with the guards still in the room, he couldn’t afford dropping the act. In fact, he had to sell it even further if they were going to get out of this safely.

As if his legs gave out, Yeonjun fell to one knee as he screwed up his face into something he hoped looked like shame and regret. “I’m sorry,” he wailed, “I’m so sorry, I’m so—”

His friends screamed in anger when one of the guards kicked Yeonjun in the back, effectively silencing him and making him crash headfirst to the floor. Instantly, pain blossomed up in the left side of his face, and he’d surely have a nasty bruise there tomorrow.

It took every ounce of self-control in him to whimper in fear instead of curse in anger like he wanted to.

While one guard kept him down, kneeling on his back before he could push himself off the floor, he heard the other guard enter the middle of the room where Chanhee and Heesung were.

He could barely see what was going on, but he heard ripping sounds that he guessed meant they were being released from their bounds.

Yeonjun already knew his friends were too weak to fight back. He’d seen them in good lighting for the first time ever – instead of just seeing shapes and shadows on their faces that he was used to in the cells – and they looked so thin and battered that he was surprised they would even be able to stand on their two feet.

Heesung stumbled as he was pushed off the chair, and Yeonjun couldn’t help himself from trying to get the guard off him so he could go to him. There was no use, though, because the man only leaned more of his body weight onto him, and Yeonjun was still too weak to pull forth enough strength to move him.

Some more scuffles were heard until finally, Yeonjun was given the grace of being pulled off the floor. He barely had time to register what was going on before he was being lifted into one of the chairs, however, and suddenly his legs were strapped tight.

Tilting his head to the left, he saw Heesung and Chanhee crouching in the corner, their hands locked together with handcuffs.

The pain on his face as he looked at them was not fake. “I’m sorry,” he repeated, and this time he somewhat meant it.

I’m sorry for taking so long.

I’m sorry for giving you hope and taking it away from you.

I’m sorry for fooling you.

He hated that the grievous looks on their faces were because of him, that he was the reason for the last of their hope seeping away.

Just a few more minutes, he thought. As soon as the coast is clear, I’ll tell you what’s going on. This will be over soon; we just need to wait.

They only had to wait for a minute more before Mr X entered the room. There was something different to him, a new kind of light in his eyes that told just how excited he was to examine Yeonjun now. So much that he seemed to forget—or perhaps he simply did not care—to send Chanhee and Heesung back to their cells. In fact, he told the guards to leave them, as he seemed hell bent on privacy all of a sudden.

It didn’t surprise Yeonjun at all to see the scientist so excited to study him. He almost expected the man to start singing with the way he was grinning down at him.

He shone light into Yeonjun’s still blue eyes, blinding him for nearly a minute. Mr X didn’t seem to know, or perhaps care, that omegan eyes were very sensitive to light.

“Fascinating,” Mr X muttered to himself. “An omega. Very interesting. Not intended, perhaps it’s connected to genetics…”

Over Mr X’s shoulder, he locked eyes with Chanhee. There was a horrified look on his face, and Yeonjun could just imagine how confusing this whole situation must be to an outside eye.

A slimy hand squeezing his right arm made him jerk, and he couldn’t help the shudder that ran down his spine. It was uncomfortable, no, downright distressing, to have the man basically feeling up his muscles with interest.

“Very interesting,” Mr X continued talking to himself. “I must check to see…” He let go of Yeonjun, hurrying over to the table containing his instruments.

Now was as good a time as any.

With his eyes locked on the man’s back, he worked as quickly as he could to pull his fingers up, carefully inching the small knife loosely strapped to his wrist down towards his palm.

This was another thing he’d practiced in the time he’d spent at the police station. They had thought about everything, different scenarios of what could happen once he’d been taken inside, and being strapped up was one of them. As such, they had equipped Yeonjun with a knife that he could pull down with a piece of string until he could reach it with his fingers.

It took him a couple of seconds before his finger grasped the hilt of it and he pulled it out, before he turned his hand around to hide it.

After that, he waited for the right timing. As Mr X turned back around, Yeonjun stayed unmoving as the man took his blood pressure and measured the size of his muscles.

The next time the man turned around, muttering about blood samples, Yeonjun chose to act. There was no way he was letting that man get a sample of his blood.

As quickly as he could, he sawed through the strap close to his wrist. It was tricky, and his heartbeat sped up as he kept at it, fear of failure grabbing hold of him. In the middle of it, his eyes met Chanhee’s. There was a deeply determined look on the other boy’s face, and he was nodding, silently cheering Yeonjun on.

The strap gave in, and with a jolt Yeonjun’s arm came loose.

The sound had alerted Mr X, though, and there was no time to cut himself loose fully. Thankfully, Taehyun had anticipated this situation too, and Yeonjun reached into his pant pocket, pulling out a tiny bottle.

Luck was on his side. His timing was just perfect; the moment Mr X came running to his side, about to punch a needle in him, he lifted the bottle and released its content all over Mr X’s face.

Pepper spray, curtesy of Beomgyu.

Yeonjun rejoiced at the way Mr X cried out in pain as the spray hit his eyes, and even more so when he stumbled back into the table and knocked his equipment to the floor.

The extra seconds gave Yeonjun the time he needed to cut himself free.

Meanwhile, Mr X was stumbling, unable to see but still trying to get to Yeonjun. “No!” he screamed, in fear of losing his golden subject.

Yeonjun ignored him, only pushing him away when he came stumbling blindly towards him. He managed to knock the man over and saw him hit his head, hard. Judging by the sounds he was making, Yeonjun didn’t expect him to get up any time soon.

“Hey guys.” Yeonjun flashed a bright smile at his friends as he squatted in front of them. “I’m happy to see you in the light, for once.”

“What’s going on?” Chanhee questioned, staring at Yeonjun with a searching gaze. His eyes widened further when Yeonjun pulled out another tool from his pockets. The fact that neither Mr X nor the guards had bothered to check him earlier was ironic, since he hadn’t bothered to hide them very well.

“We’re getting you out of here, of course,” he said, reaching for the cuffs around Chanhee’s wrists and immediately starting to pick the lock. He tried to be quick, knowing he didn’t have nearly as much time as he’d wished. Thankfully, Mr X seemed to still be incapacitated on the floor behind him, and he noticed that Heesung was keeping a firm eye on him.

“We?” Chanhee repeated.

Lifting his head to catch their eyes, Yeonjun smirked. “Did you think I was just wandering around helplessly all night? I got help, of course.”

At the same time as the first lock flicked open, a loud bang sounded, shaking the building. Yeonjun looked around, listening for some more seconds. Thankfully, he heard no footsteps coming his way, but he still cursed under his breath and immediately started on the other lock.

Heesung threw his cuffs to the side the moment Yeonjun got them open. Together, the three of them stood on unstable legs.

“Shit,” Chanhee hissed the moment they turned around, and Yeonjun noticed immediately what he’d cursed for.

Mr X was gone.

“Let’s just get out of here,” Yeonjun said, pushing down his worries that Mr X was off to make trouble. He couldn’t have come far, blinded and knocked down like that, so hopefully he wouldn’t get in the way of their plan now.

“Grab something that can be used as weapons, just in case,” he instructed the other two, looking towards the table next to them. They needed to get out of this room and free the rest of the boys before the guards were all alerted of what was going on.

Yeonjun just hoped that the loud bang they’d hear earlier was curtesy of the police force that were supposed to enter the building to catch the guards by surprise. He didn’t want to think about how destruction of property hadn’t been part of the plan they’d made and hoped that it was just improvisation in the moment.

From the table, Heesung grabbed a big glass bottle, and Chanhee a pair of scissors and a syringe. The only thing big enough to be useful was a belt, and Yeonjun grabbed it without hesitation. Better that than nothing. Chanhee handed his small knife back as well, and then Yeonjun ushered them towards the exit.

“We need to get the others out of their cells,” he said as he led the way down the corridor, taking determined steps to give the impression that he was confident in what they were doing. “Assuming the others have done their part, the guards should be taken care of by now.” They rounded a corner, thankfully without seeing anyone. “Still, be ready to fight.”

Yeonjun could only hope that the police had made it into the building without problem. In case of emergency, they had put a locating device on Yeonjun to make it easier for them to find them.

It took a couple of more turns, turns that each of them was very familiar with after having been led down this corridor multiple times, until they found themselves by the door leading into the dark corridor where they hoped they would find their friends in good shape still.

They didn’t hesitate to go in, but once the door opened, they stopped abruptly in surprise. The corridor was lit up entirely, and it made the space look so different that it startled them. 

“Guys!” Chanhee’s yell jerked Yeonjun back into action. “Yeonjun’s here!”

An uproar of surprised voices sounded through the place, and all at once the locked-up boys appeared by the doors to their cells.

“Try to find keys somewhere,” Yeonjun told Chanhee, indicating that he take Heesung with him to the other side of the corridor. “It’ll take too long to pick all the locks.”

The two boys nodded and immediately followed his orders, running through the corridor.

Stepping forward, Yeonjun ignored the cell that used to be his, not wanting to see it for even another second. Instead, he moved to the next cell, calling for the owner of it even before he reached out to grab at the barred door. “Juyeon!”

One look inside told him that Juyeon was not there.

“They took him not long ago,” said Jongho from the cell next to Juyeon’s. Yeonjun cursed as he moved over to Jongho’s cell, meeting his eyes for the first time.

“So, that’s what you look like,” the younger boy commented, flashing a tired grin that Yeonjun mirrored. It sure was strange to see the faces of the someone he’d only heard speaking from down the corridor for over 5 weeks. Some of them he’d caught glances of when the guards led them back from the lab, but the others he hadn’t had any idea what they really looked like.

Yeonjun just finished picking the lock to Jongho’s door when Chanhee exclaimed they’d found the keys, and he couldn’t help letting out a relieved sigh.

After opening Jongho’s door, Yeonjun let out a surprised ‘oof’ as he was knocked into by the slightly shorted boy. “I’m so happy to see you, hyung,” Jongho said as he wrapped his arms around Yeonjun.

“Me too,” Yeonjun said, hugging him back tightly. He wanted to ask how they’d been doing since he escaped, if the guards and scientists had punished them somehow after his escape mission, but there was no time. They had to get out of there, and then they’d have all the time in the world to catch up.

It only took Chanhee and Heesung a minute or two to get all doors opened. When they were done, Yeonjun suddenly had 8 pairs of eyes on him, waiting for him to take charge.

“What now, boss?” Chanhee asked, speaking for all of them.

For a moment it was quiet as Yeonjun let his gaze run over them. They were all scrawny and weak, he could tell, more so than he himself was. Still, there was a fire in their eyes that gave Yeonjun confidence that they would last longer in a fight than you’d expect.

“We’re getting out,” Yeonjun said. “But first, we’re getting Juyeon.” He was met with agreeing nods that gave him confidence to lead them. “Does anyone know where they took him?”

He glanced at Jongho, but the boy only shook his head. “They took him in that direction.” Jongho pointed in the opposite end of the corridor than the one they usually were taken. “None of us have been there before, so we’ll have to go in blind.”

Well shit. Yeonjun didn’t like the sound of that.

But they didn’t have a choice, did they?

“Then we go that way,” Yeonjun responded and pushed past the guys to lead the way. “Keep quiet and stay behind me.”

He was more cautious when going through this door, opening it slowly to not make too much sound, and peeking his head through before deciding it was safe to go in. There was yet another corridor behind it, leading to another set of doors.

It hit Yeonjun that it had been foolish of him to take his eyes off Mr X earlier. He had thought that he would just go and get the other boys and then immediately lead them out of there, but of course nothing went according to the plan.

“Let’s try every door,” Yeonjun decided and pushed forward through the corridor. His heartrate sped up as soon as he reached the first door. It turned out to be locked, so they quickly moved past it.

The second door revealed an empty cupboard. There was nothing in there, and Yeonjun was about to leave it behind when the sight of a metal pipe caught his eye. Not the perfect weapon, but definitely better than a belt.

The third and fourth door proved to be empty as well. When they reached the fifth one, though, Yeonjun froze. With a finger over his lips, he told the others to stay quiet.

His sensitive ears picked up a low, but distinguishable ruckus behind the door. Someone was breathing heavily, and there seemed to be some kind of struggle.

“This is it,” he whispered, as he was sure that he had heard a familiar grunt from inside, and he saw some of the others suck in their breaths. Hand on the handle, he pulled the door open. They all spilled in, only to freeze the moment they were over the threshold.

The room was not so different from the one Yeonjun had been brought to earlier. To the side, there was a desk and a chair, and on top of the table was an open computer with a document showing on the screen.

But that’s not what caught their eyes.

At the other end of the room there was a door. In front of the door stood Mr X, holding a knife to Juyeon’s throat.

“Stop right there,” Mr X shouted as soon as he saw them. He must’ve heard them coming, or at least expected them, considering the position he was holding Juyeon in.

The redness was still very much present around Mr X’s eyes, showing the traces left from the pepper spray. Yeonjun hoped the motherfucker would get permanent sight problems after this.

“Let him go,” Yeonjun demanded, a warning in his voice.

Mr X let out a humourless laugh. “He is dear to you, is he not? Don’t think I haven’t noticed his position between all of you.”

“Let. Him. Go.” Yeonjun said, taking a step towards them. He had noticed the fact that Juyeon was bleeding from both his forehead and his arm, and it was making him see red.

He should not have moved, because as soon as he did Mr X pushed the knife harder against Juyeon’s skin, enough to make him flinch in pain. “Ah ah ah! This is what’s going to happen,” Mr X explained, staring at Yeonjun only. “I’m going to go out through this door, with my computer, and you’re going to let me leave. One wrong move and I kill this boy.”

Clenching his firsts, Yeonjun got the strange urge to bare his teeth at him. He did so, and a low rumbling sound that he didn’t recognize escaped him.

He glanced at the computer halfway between them and Mr X and considered it. The mere thought of letting Mr X run was painful. He wanted to refuse, to smash the computer right in his face and make sure to bring him to justice. Because if they let him go now, he was sure that Mr X had some secret escape route behind that door that would have him escape even the grasp of the police. And if they gave him his computer, they would give him the possibility to continue his research somewhere else.

But none of that mattered in the face of losing Juyeon. Every cell in his body wanted, no needed to save Juyeon. This was all thanks to Juyeon. The fact that he, and the rest of the boys, survived everything they went through, it was because of Juyeon. Not to mention that if it hadn’t been for him, Yeonjun wouldn’t have gotten out at all.

“Hand me the computer, boy,” Mr X ordered, likely noticing the conflict in Yeonjun’s mind. “Leave the weapons.”

Growling once more, and this time recognizing it as an animalistic sound, Yeonjun let the pipe fall to the ground. It clattered startingly loud. Once it was quiet, Yeonjun moved.

“Good. Nice and slow, boy,” Mr X goaded him as he walked over to the desk, his eyes crazily focused on Yeonjun’s every move. “Now, hand it to me and step back.”

Yeonjun did as he was told. Once the computer was in his hands, he had the sudden urge to smash it into pieces, but he did not dare to. His eyes found Juyeon’s. Surprisingly, there was little fear in his expression, just worry and confusion.

He handed the computer to Mr X’s free hand. Perhaps if Juyeon had been strong enough, he could have taken that moment to wriggle free of his grip, but Yeonjun knew Juyeon was barely holding on. He looked like just staying awake cost every ounce of his energy.

Slowly, Yeonjun stepped back to the boys, holding his hands in the air. They watched in trepidation as Mr X dragged Juyeon back with him, nearing the door.

Yeonjun smelled rather than saw the blood as Mr X got careless enough to dig the knife deeper into Juyeon’s throat as he moved with him. It was only a matter of seconds before Yeonjun would lose it.

With the hand holding the computer, Mr X reached behind and opened the door, so damn slowly.

Yeonjun startled as Mr X suddenly dropped the knife and pushed Juyeon away from him, making him crash onto his knees. He barely had time to catch Juyeon before he hit the floor. Looking up, he saw the door close, Mr X disappearing behind it. Jongho—having been one step behind Yeonjun—ran after him, only to furiously realize that the door was locked from the other side.

Meanwhile, Juyeon looked up at Yeonjun with wonder in his eyes. “I knew it,” he said, a chuckle escaping his weak lips. “I knew you were our last hope.”

Before Yeonjun could speak any words of reassurance back, Juyeon’s eyes rolled back, and his body slumped as he fell unconscious. Panic clawed at Yeonjun, and he looked wide-eyed up at Chanhee.

“He will be alright,” Chanhee said in a hard voice. “He has to be.” He moved to lift his arms, and together the boys carried Juyeon out of there.

After finding Juyeon, it was over very soon. The police had done their part well, and it seemed that the locator device served its purpose, as they found them shortly after Mr X’s escape.

Some five, maybe ten minutes later, Yeonjun found himself wrapped in a blanket, sitting with Chanhee on the ramp of an ambulance. The rest of the boys were scattered around them, some being tended to by nurses and some answering the police’s questions.

Behind them inside the ambulance, was Juyeon, who Yeonjun could hear was still unconscious. The nurse was talking, trying to wake him up, while also checking the state of his body.

“I can’t believe it,” Chanhee said, pulling Yeonjun’s attention back to him. “I can’t believe you actually saved us.”

Yeonjun nudged him with his elbow. “Did you have no faith in me?” he asked gently and teasingly wiggled his eyebrows. “Did you think I would just leave you guys behind?”

“I don’t know. Fear makes you distrustful, I guess. If you’d have saved yourself, I would’ve understood.” He gave Yeonjun an apologetic look. “But I’m really grateful, Yeonjun. It takes a lot of courage to do what you did.”

“I couldn’t stomach the thought of leaving you in there for a day longer,” Yeonjun answered, smiling sheepishly. “Knowing you’d all been there longer than me, and that you put your faith in me; there’s no way I could’ve walked away from that.”

They shared a knowing look, smiling in pure, relieved joy for the first time in a long while.

One of the officers stepped up in front of them, holding a phone up to them and asking, “does any of you want to call your family?”

Yeonjun stared at the phone for a few moments. Technically, his own phone should be somewhere around, likely with the chief, but he still considered grabbing the offered phone just because he wanted to hear Soobin’s voice. But he knew the question was more for Chanhee, who hadn’t been able to see his loved ones just an hour ago like Yeonjun had.

Chanhee looked startled by the question, like he hadn’t thought about it. “I—I… yeah. I do but…” he glanced behind him, into the ambulance where the nurse was still tending to Juyeon. “I want to wait until he’s awake. Otherwise, I won’t be able to calm down.”

The man nodded and left them.

“You care a lot about him,” Yeonjun commented when the man moved on, a fond smile on his lips.

“Of course I do.” Chanhee didn’t care to deny it. He wrapped the blanket a little tighter around himself, then fixed his eyes on Yeonjun’s. “When you go through something like this together, of course I care.”

“Yeah, but it’s different with him, isn’t it?”

Chanhee rolled his eyes, but Yeonjun noticed the redness spreading on his cheeks. He coughed and abruptly changed the topic, and Yeonjun let him do so just because he looked so awkward. Awkward and cute.

“So, uh, tell me about you. Your… your eyes. It’s because of the injections, isn’t it?”

Yeonjun let out a long sigh. Chanhee’s words reminded him that his eyes were most likely still blue right now. He hated how he couldn’t even tell, how the only indication that his eyes were luminescent was if strong lights hurt his eyes more than normal.  “Yeah,” he answered, eyes flitting down to the ground.

He didn’t know if he was fully ready to talk about this with more people, but he also didn’t want to keep it a secret. It was his life now, wasn’t it?

And there was no shame to it, he had to remind himself.

“I think this was their goal all along. To… figure out a way to turn humans into werewolves.”

Chanhee’s eyes widened at the last word. “Wait.” He blinked repeatedly, until finally understanding settled on his face. “Oh fuck. They… they turned you into an omega?”

Yeonjun shrugged.

“That’s…” Chanhee seemed to bite his tongue before sighing. “Well. They are bastards, the lot of them.” His words made Yeonjun laugh. “But you’re okay, right?”

“I’m…” Yeonjun sighed. “I don’t know. I haven’t had time to let it sink in yet, like it feels like I’m up in the clouds or hallucinating half of the time. It’s just… a weird thought. That I used to be human, and now I’m just… not. I think with time, I’ll be okay. Right now, I’m just trying not to think about it.”

“I’m sorry it happened to you, of all people.”

Yeonjun smiled, shaking his head. “I’m not. I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone else, but I have some great people in my life that can help me adjust. I’m just glad they didn’t have time to do it to somebody else.”

They talked for a short while longer, until the chief of police approached them and handed Yeonjun his phone back. He also offered Chanhee the chance to call his parents again, but the boy declined kindly once again.

He quickly sent a text message in their group chat, telling his friends that everything had gone well. A couple of messages popped up immediately, two from Soobin and one from Kai. He was about to answer when a sudden voice calling out behind him startled him.

“Guys?”

Both Yeonjun and Chanhee were out of their seats in an instant at the sound of Juyeon’s voice. They found him sitting upright in the bed in the middle of the ambulance, and the nurse was nowhere to be seen.

Juyeon looked about the same as before – worn out and exhausted – but with the addition of a white bandage wrapped around his throat. At a closer look, there was also a drip connected to his arm.

While Yeonjun walked calmly in there, Chanhee ran inside. As soon as he reached Juyeon, he threw himself on top of him in what he must’ve aimed for to be a hug.

First, Juyeon let out a huff as Chanhee knocked the air out of him. Then, when Chanhee adjusted his embrace to give him some space, he beamed and said, “hello to you too.”

“I think someone’s happy to see you,” Yeonjun teased, sitting down in the chair next to Juyeon’s.

Juyeon’s fond gaze shifted from Chanhee over to him, and a much more complex expression took place on his face. “Yeonjun,” he said, reaching out with one free hand in his direction. Yeonjun didn’t hesitate to grab it. “Thank you, Yeonjun.” Juyeon squeezed his hand with little force. “We owe you our lives.”

Yeonjun shook his head. “I’m just happy I managed to get all of you out alive. Are you okay?”

“I’m good.” Juyeon smiled. “Better than I have been in months, at least.”

Glancing at Chanhee, who was still basically sitting on his lap, Juyeon seemed to forget about Yeonjun’s presence very quickly as the two of them locked eyes. There was something unsaid in their shared gaze, the way they were looking at each other so very deep and meaningful that Yeonjun felt like he was intruding.

“I’m just gonna,” Yeonjun nodded towards the back of the car, “make a phone call. I’ll let you two talk.”

Conveniently, his phone started ringing the moment he was out of the car. He knew without looking who it was that was calling, and answered with a smile on his lips.

“Hyung!” Soobin exclaimed the moment he picked up. “Are you okay? We heard the police reporting that the operation went well, but I need to hear it from you too. Tell me you’re fine and not hurt anywhere, please.”

Yeonjun chuckled at Soobin’s fast speech. “I’m fine, Binnie. Totally unscathed.”

“You sure you’re not just saying that to not make me worry?”

“Why would I lie to you?”

Soobin huffed. “I don’t know. It’s like that time you didn’t tell me you broke your hand when you caught me jumping out of that tree. I had to find out from my mom, telling me you were at the hospital.”

After laughing, Yeonjun argued. “Hey, that time was different. I didn’t want you to feel bad about it.”

“As if I wasn’t gonna notice you broke your hand,” Soobin muttered. Then he snorted and added. “I thought your hearing was supposed to be good now, Hyung.”

“Huh?”

“Turn around.”

Yeonjun turned, and at the same time as he heard the beeping of the line being hung up, his eyes fell on Soobin running towards him.

There was no time or need to be surprised. Yeonjun had almost expected him to be there, because of course he was. He and the other three of his friends had vowed to not be too far away, probably hanging out in Taehyun’s car nervously until they got Yeonjun’s text.

He met Soobin halfway, crashing into him in an emotional embrace. Instantly, his senses were dulled as Soobin’s pleasant scent filled the air around him, calming him down within seconds.

“Thank you for not getting yourself killed,” Soobin said, his voice coming out completely serious now, in contrast to his previously teasing tone over the phone.

Yeonjun huffed in surprise. “You’re welcome,” he said with a chuckle. When he went to break the embrace, however, Soobin’s arms wrapped even tighter around him, unwilling to let him go.

“I know you were confident that it would work,” Soobin mumbled, mouth almost by Yeonjun’s ear now, his breath tickling the back of his neck, “but I… I was scared. It wasn’t nice, being on the outside. Let… let me just hold you for a minute, please?”

Yeonjun blinked stupidly. “Uhhh, yeah. Okay.”

His own hands that had fallen to his side wound their way around Soobin’s waist, and he heard the alpha sigh in content.

Being so close to Soobin was nice. It melted all his worries away, to be finally back by his side. But it was also dangerous to his sanity. Because Soobin smelled good, too good, and it was everything that Yeonjun could think about.

He pictured it in his mind. How it would feel to run his nose up and down Soobin’s neck, searching for the source of that heavenly smell. How he would find it and lap at it, taste it—the need to do so was growing ever stronger. 

His thoughts were anything but pure. It was a bad, bad time to get turned on. Really bad. Soobin would know, immediately. He would smell it, and then everything would go to shit. Not to mention the fact that they were surrounded by traumatized boys that looked up to Yeonjun, in some way.

Before he could force himself out of his spiralling mind, the loud sound of someone clearing their throat from very close made them jump out of each other’s arms in an instant.

With wide eyes, Yeonjun turned and saw Taehyun, Kai and Beomgyu stand there, each one of them with different expressions on their faces. Taehyun looked thoughtful, eyeing them both in suspicion, while Kai looked like he was happy that everything was back to normal. Beomgyu, on the other hand, looked smug as he mainly looked at Soobin.

For a moment, Yeonjun dreaded meeting Soobin’s eyes, after the string of impure thoughts he’d just thought about him. He allowed himself a small, teeny tiny glance at his face, sideways, and was surprised to see Soobin looking very flustered.

Before he could question it, though, Taehyun stepped forward and pulled Yeonjun into a quick hug of his own. Kai was next, and Beomgyu gave him a big smile and a clap on the shoulder. They repeated what Soobin had said before, that they had been worried, but at least they had the decency to say that they had believed Yeonjun would succeed, unlike Soobin. 

It had him snorting and slapping Soobin’s arm playfully. “I can’t believe you were the only one who thought I wasn’t gonna make it,” he teased, feeling himself return to his normal, goofy self all of a sudden.

He had missed normal.

While the police took the testimony from all the boys—Yeonjun included—the others stayed with him. They tried to convince him that they should just go home, since he’d had a hell of a day, but Yeonjun couldn’t leave before he knew that all the boys were going to be okay.

Families were being called and alerted, and Yeonjun overheard many tearful phone calls with his sensitive ears. He nearly started crying himself when Juyeon finally got to call his family, and the phone was handed to his sisters.

At one point, in between testimonies and families arriving to pick them up, Yeonjun introduced his friends to Juyeon and Chanhee, who had heard a number of few stories about them while they were locked in their cells.

It felt oddly like a nice reunion, as if people from two parts of his life was coming together. Yeonjun felt calm, seeing Soobin smiling and talking to Juyeon. He hoped all of them would stay in his life after this.

As hours passed, the boys were picked up by their families at different times, since they were all from different cities. Yeonjun made sure to say goodbye to each one of them before they went home, asking them to stay in touch.

When it was Juyeon’s time to leave, he gave Yeonjun an extra long hug, and made sure to once again tell him how thankful he was.

“I hope you’ll be alright after this, Yeonjun-ah,” he said as he leaned out of the embrace, meeting Yeonjun’s eyes. With the help of Soobin, he’d managed to get his eyes back to normal a few hours ago, but he still felt like Juyeon was seeing the blue in them somehow. “Just call me, if you ever need anything.”

It was odd, having people look at him like that. Sure, he understood their worry and their pity, but right now he didn’t feel that different. Maybe it hadn’t sunk in yet, but he didn’t feel like it was as terrible as everyone made it seem.

So, he’d just thanked Juyeon and waved off any other worried words that came after that.

The last boy to leave was Jeongin, one of the youngest boys that had been in a cell far from Yeonjun’s. He had barely talked to the boy over the past 5 weeks, but that didn’t matter at all. When his family had arrived, Jeongin had given Yeonjun the longest hug of them all and thanked him for saving his life, before running right into the arms of his family.

There had been a lot of tears involved after that. Yeonjun had turned to leave, not wanting to intrude, when someone came running over to them.

“Hey, wait!” the guy said, sounding a bit out of breath. Yeonjun turned and came face to face with a handsome guy around his age, slightly shorter than him with his hair pulled away from his face in a half ponytail. “Hey Beomgyu,” he added with a surprised chuckle, and Yeonjun realized that the guy wasn’t looking at him at all.

“Hyunjin,” Beomgyu said. “I should’ve known that kid was your brother, you look just the same.”

Hyunjin shook his head, smiling. “We don’t.” He looked to Yeonjun again and added. “I’m Hyunjin, like he said, Jeongin’s older brother.”

Yeonjun nodded, having understood that much.

“I just wanted to say thank you,” Hyunjin said, eyes flitting over the five of them but mainly focusing on Yeonjun. “Jeongin told us what you did on the phone earlier, and when he said it was you standing over here, I just had to tell you that I’m so so grateful for what you did. Thank you, for going back and saving my little brother, and the other kids as well.”

“You really don’t need to thank me,” Yeonjun said. “There was no way I could’ve left them in there.”

“Still, you deserve the thanks. Not everyone is that kind-hearted nowadays.” Hyunjin held out his hand as if he wanted to shake Yeonjun’s, and Yeonjun let him. “So, thank you. And if there’s ever anything you need, just call me or my little brother.” He smiled, and then waved as he prepared to leave. Before he did so, though, he saluted to Beomgyu and said, “see you Saturday.”

“Don’t be late!” Beomgyu called after him.

Amused and confused at the same time, Yeonjun turned to give Beomgyu a questioning look.

“We’re bandmates,” he explained simply with a shrug.

When Jeongin and his family left, it was like the last of their energy was drained out of them. They went back to where Taehyun had left the car, none of them speaking a word, but it wasn’t really needed. After the day they’d had—Yeonjun especially—they needed some peace and quiet.

They had a long ride before them. As soon as he was buckled in, sitting in the back with Soobin on one side and Kai on the other, he felt himself slipping away already.

Taehyun started the car, and Yeonjun’s head fell against Soobin’s shoulder.

Right there, surrounded by his friends and knowing that he would finally be going home, the storming sea that had roared inside him these last few days finally came to a stop.  

At last, Yeonjun found peace.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

Yeonjun woke up just as they parked outside his apartment building. Eyes blurry from sleep, he blinked up at it, trying to figure out how he was feeling about being home. It was surreal, if anything. He felt both like an eternity had passed and no time at all since he was last home.  

Then he thought about his own bed and felt like he had never longed for something this bad.

His friends clearly didn’t want to leave him alone for another second, so all five of them got out of the car and made the short trip up to Yeonjun’s apartment. Taehyun was being very gentlemanly and wrapped his arms around Yeonjun the moment he stepped out of the car, keeping a steady hand on him as he was still quite dizzy with sleep.

A pleasant smell that he realized must be Taehyun’s scent wrapped around him, making Yeonjun feel warm and loved. It was a nice scent, but hard to put his finger on. Something nature-like, fresh yet heavy at the same time.

Not a minute later, Yeonjun stood in the middle of his bedroom, staring as if he could somehow make the feeling of being home come back. Instead, he felt disconnected, like he wasn’t really there. It was almost too good to be true. For weeks he had been sleeping in a dark, cold cell with no mattress, no pillow or blanket; no comfort whatsoever. And now, he was back in his apartment as if nothing had happened. As if no time had passed.

Although, it didn’t look like his place had been abandoned for more than a month, he realized as he looked around. There were papers cluttered on his desk, trash in the bin and a hoodie thrown on top of his unmade bed.

He looked questioningly at his friends and noticed Soobin scratching at the back of his neck.

“I, um,” Soobin began, looking bashful. His eyes scanned the floor, not daring to meet Yeonjun’s eyes. “I kind of stayed in your apartment while you were gone.”

As he said it, Yeonjun breathed in deep through his nose and recognized Soobin’s scent all around him. Somehow, the realization made him feel a little less uncomfortable. “You did? Why?”

“You were gone, and we didn’t find any leads, so I… I don’t know, being here made it easier to pretend you weren’t gone, you know?” He glanced up at Yeonjun, and his gaze was one filled with guilt. “I’m sorry—”

“I truly don’t mind, Bin-ah,” Yeonjun cut him off, his face lighting up with a soft smile. It was a good thing he wasn’t too close, or Yeonjun might’ve slipped up and kissed him right now. That’s how struck he felt by Soobin’s indirect display of how much he cared.

Yeonjun looked at his friends, then. Soobin was the only one who had taken his shoes off – perhaps because he was feeling more at home there than the others – and that made Yeonjun realize that they were all waiting for him to do something.

He quickly told them to get comfortable while he got in the shower, having a feeling it would take him some time in there.

Being able to take a shower after 5 weeks of living in his own grime was almost too luxurious. He cringed when thinking about his friends having spent hours in the car with him, he must have smelled so bad.

When the hot water ran over his scalp and down his back, Yeonjun felt more at ease than he thought possible. He stayed under the water for longer than he normally would. As it covered his head, the water cut off all sounds around him and put him in his own little world for a few blissful moments.

He almost cried after he had washed the shampoo and body wash off and finally felt clean again. His hands ran back and forth through his wet strands, as if he couldn’t believe that it could feel like this.

After the shower, he did his best to look as little in the mirror as possible. Sure, he was seeing himself as he looked down and got dressed, but it was a whole other thing to see himself in full in the mirror. It would give him a new perspective that he wasn’t ready to see.

It felt nice to finally be in clean clothes, as well. He’d brought comfortable, covering clothes as he entered the bathroom to shower, because he was also not ready for his friends to see all the marks on his skin. If they had to see it at some point, Yeonjun preferred that to be when all the new wounds and bruises had healed, at least.

When he exited the bathroom, his friends’ quiet conversation stopped abruptly when they saw Yeonjun.

“How are you feeling?” Soobin asked.

Looking down at himself, Yeonjun shrugged. “A little more like normal.”

“That’s good,” Taehyun said. He glanced at the other three before continuing, “We discussed a little what to do now. We think you should go and talk to Soobin’s mom about, you know, what’s going on with you. If you would want that.”

Soobin’s mom was a nurse, specialized in werewolf care, so she should be able to tell if his body was behaving in any strange way. She was also a very kind lady that treated him like he was her son his whole life, so it didn’t make sense for him to panic so much about seeing her. Stil, an unexpected shiver ran down Yeonjun’s spine. The mere idea of more people he knew seeing him like this made his hands shake, and he had to shove them in his pant pockets so the others wouldn’t notice.

He glanced at Soobin for reassurance and was met by a sweet smile. “It’s going to be fine,” Soobin said. “Then we can stay at my parents’ house together, and just have a fun evening playing games and whatever you’d like.”

“Oh.” Yeonjun felt almost sentimental at just the thought of having a normal hangout with his friends. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

They took the car to Soobin’s house. The closer they got, the more Yeonjun’s nerves started acting up, as he couldn’t help worrying about what Soobin’s mom would say.

Again, he knew it was stupid, because why would Soobin’s mom—the person who’d always treated him like part of the family—get mad at him for something he couldn’t control? The more he thought about it, the more he realised that she would probably react just like Soobin; initially surprised, but completely understanding once the shock settled. That was good. He could handle that.

Thinking about Soobin’s mom made his mind to wander to his own parents. He had asked Soobin to tell them that he was found, but he hadn’t wanted them to come get him because he feared how they would react to seeing him.

Part of him knew that his parents loved him. It was just… they were sometimes bad at showing it, especially when the words that came out of their mouths contradicted that statement. It was mainly his mom—his dad was just bad at communication in total—who would sometimes forget to filter her words around him.

Considering she had warned him about the kidnappings, he just knew that she would bring it up the moment she saw him.

“Hey, you okay?”

Soobin’s whisper in his ear startled him. He was sitting in the back left, with Soobin next to him. In the front, Beomgyu and Taehyun were conversing about something random. Yeonjun hadn’t been listening.

“Hm?” he mumbled, not knowing if he was up to let his thoughts out in this moment. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Soobin’s eyes were filled with worry once again. He wondered how Soobin could tell that he was upset, because he really thought he’d been controlling his face just now.

Then, he saw Beomgyu turn from the front seat, his nose sniffing the air as his eyes fell on Yeonjun. For all the animosity that had been between the two of them before, Yeonjun felt it a bit strange when Beomgyu’s expression turned worried and pitiful.

It hit him then that it must be his scent that was betraying him and telling his friends about his emotional state.

Well. It seemed like lying would suddenly be much harder than before, if he didn’t figure out how to control his scent soon. Typical.

“It’s nothing,” he said, deciding maybe his friends deserved to know, “I was just thinking about my parents.” The car went silent after his admission, Soobin’s hand landing on his knee and squeezed sympathetically.

Yeonjun sighed and looked out the window. The streets he had known for the last couple of years were swooshing by, familiar to his eyes but feeling oddly estranged to him right in this moment.

“If you’re worried how they will react,” Soobin said, “I can be there with you if you want.”

“We all will, if you need us,” said Kai, leaning forward to look at Yeonjun. His eyes were sad, but not in the way that showed he was upset about Yeonjun’s predicament, but in the way that showed he was upset his friend was hurting.

The two in the front seat hummed in agreement as well. Taehyun locked eyes with Yeonjun in the back mirror for a second, and it was enough to calm the fear in Yeonjun’s chest for at least right now.

Thinking of the words he’d said to Chanhee, Yeonjun felt his heart swell with love for them. His friends were there with him. For him. And they would be there by his side, every step of the way.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Soobin had told his mom that they were coming, so as soon as the car pulled up at their driveway, she was running out of the house to greet them. Yeonjun had only just gotten out of the car when he was enveloped in her very familiar hug.

It was a teary reunion. Yeonjun didn’t get many words out as she cried and caressed his face lovingly, scanning over him as if she didn’t believe her eyes.

In the end, Soobin had to pull her away from him so they could go inside the house. Taehyun and the others made for the stairs, giving them some space. It didn’t dawn on Yeonjun until they were sat in the living room, and he saw the knowing but confused look in Soobin’s mom’s eyes, that he would have to explain it all again. He felt heavy and anxious just thinking about it.

“So, mom,” Soobin began, taking Yeonjun’s hand in his reassuringly, “we’ve got a bit of a situation.”

She looked like she was scared to say the wrong thing, eyeing Yeonjun carefully. “I can see that. What—what happened?”

Yeonjun thought about opening his mouth and explain, to retell everything again, but he couldn’t. There was a painful weight on his chest, a pressure on his lungs that hadn’t been there before. It prevented him from uttering a single word.

But Soobin was there, and he noticed Yeonjun’s struggle. When Soobin started talking, explaining everything he knew to his mom, Yeonjun couldn’t help but stare lovingly at his face. The gratitude and love he felt in that moment must surely be visible on his face, but he didn’t care.

“This is… quite a unique case, I must say,” was the first thing Soobin’s mom said after Soobin finished. She was looking at her hands, clasped in front of her as she reflected over her son’s words. “What those… scientists did,” she said the word with venom, “it shouldn’t be possible.”

“I—I think,” Yeonjun tried, “that they were willing to do what normal scientists won’t. So maybe that’s why… why they succeeded.”

She let out a thoughtful hum. “Maybe so.” Then, abruptly, she straightened and left her seat, coming up next to Yeonjun instead. “You want me to take a look at you, honey? I don’t have much equipment at home, but a quick check should be enough.”

“Okay,” Yeonjun nodded, sucking in a long breath.

He tried to keep up appearances as Soobin’s mom ran to get her stethoscope and blood pressure pump, knowing Soobin was looking at him with the same worried gaze he’d had since yesterday. Yeonjun wasn’t used to get doted on—usually he was the one who would give Soobin the princess treatment—so he felt a bit unsure how to act under that steady gaze.

She had him sit on a chair in the middle of the living room. Soobin stood just behind him, one hand on his shoulder in reassurance. Yeonjun wanted to tell him he was fine, because he felt like such a kid with the way he was acting, but then he saw the medical equipment and his stomach turned.

Despite being in a safe environment with people he trusted, seeing similar equipment to what had been used on him by Mr X made him start to shake. They both noticed, and Soobin immediately came around and crouched in front of him, staring up at his face.

“Does this remind you of what they did to you?” Soobin’s mom asked kindly from behind her son, having moved the equipment out of Yeonjun’s view.

Yeonjun looked at her and nodded stiffly, trying to focus on the sensation of Soobin’s hand rubbing up and down his arm. He was drenched in that same, calming, dazed feeling he’d experienced last night, and realized Soobin was emitting his pheromones again. It was both helpful and addicting at the same time.

Meeting Soobin’s eyes, he smiled and muttered a soft, “thank you.”

“Are you okay to go?” Soobin’s mom asked, and Yeonjun took a deep breath before nodding. He needed to be able to stomach this if he wanted to know what was going on with his body.

So, Soobin’s mom gave him a full health check, or as much as she could with what equipment she had. First, it was the normal stuff, like listening to his heart and checking his blood pressure. Then, the more werewolf-things that Yeonjun wasn’t used to, such as checking his newly developed scent glands. That was… weird, to say the least, but he tried to simply not think too much about it.

Apparently, there was nothing wrong with him, as far as she could tell. “If I hadn’t known you, I wouldn’t have been able to tell that you were born human,” she said when she put her things away. Yeonjun had just nodded at her words, not knowing how to feel about that.

At least he was healthy.

“Would you be alright to see a werewolf doctor, dear?” she asked, petting his hair. “I have a friend who is very reliable, I could ask her to run some tests if you’d like? To ensure that everything is alright on the inside as well.”

Yeonjun sighed. He didn’t like the thought of going to the hospital, but he knew she was right. “Yeah, sure.”

Then that was that. Soobin’s mom went to call her friend, leaving Yeonjun and Soobin alone.

It was weirdly quiet for a few seconds, the tension in the air making Yeonjun feel like he was vibrating, until Soobin broke the silence with one word.

“Hyung.”

They looked each other in the eyes, and Yeonjun felt like Soobin could see right into his soul, reading all of his emotions at once. Just as his breathing hitched and the air got stuck in his throat, Soobin’s arms wrapped tightly around him.

Soobin guided him through the panic attack, holding onto him and silently reassuring him that he was there. It was the first time in a while that Yeonjun felt so utterly safe even with fear and panic coursing through his veins.

They joined their friends upstairs some fifteen minutes later. As they came upstairs, they had found them lounging on Soobin’s bed, Taehyun sitting slightly behind them as Kai and Beomgyu were playing some video game and being louder than a pair of ten-year-olds.

It became one of his best evenings in a long time, just spending some time with his best friends, being silly together without any requirements to talk about what he’d been through.

Maybe he would want to do that too, at some point. But for this one night, he was happy to pretend like everything was like it had been before.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Yeonjun didn’t remember falling asleep, but at some point he must have, because the next morning he found himself being dragged back to consciousness by gentle words spoken close to his face. Turning around to lay on his stomach, Yeonjun rubbed his face into the pillow and sank back into the dreamlands with a sigh.

The bed was so comfortable, he could cry. After sleeping in that cell for weeks, his bruised body felt like he was laying on clouds right now.

“Hyung, you need to get up or we’re gonna be late,” he heard someone saying, sounding very muffled but still penetrating through his dream landscape and reaching him.

Yeonjun grunted and refused to wake up. He’d been kidnapped for 5 weeks, he sure as hell didn’t have any appointments booked.

“Come on,” the voice said again, and something warm settled on his shoulder. The next words were whispered against his ear. “Jjunie-Hyung, you have to wake up.”

Yeonjun’s eyes shot wide open.

Jjunie-hyung?!

The last time Soobin called him that they’d been what, ten years old?

He—how—why… what?!

Fuck, why did Yeonjun like hearing that old nickname so much?

“There you are,” Soobin said, and it only dawned on Yeonjun now that Soobin was wearing a smug smirk on his face.

“Ugh, Soobin-aaah,” he groaned, trying to save face by shoving Soobin away and hiding his face in his pillow again. “Just let me sleep, will you?”

“Can’t,” Soobin said, pulling him away from the pillow so that he was looking up at him again. “You have a doctor’s appointment to in an hour.”

“Huh?” Yeonjun rubbed his eyes for good measure, as if that would help kick start his memory.

“My mom said she’d contact a doctor for you, remember?” Soobin leaned back and grabbed something. The next second, a shirt hit Yeonjun’s face. “Well, she had some time today, and I think it’s good to get you checked as soon as possible.”

Yeonjun groaned once more and sat up begrudgingly. Absentmindedly, Yeonjun registered that it seemed to be only him and Soobin in the room. In Soobin’s bed. The others must’ve left last night at some point after he fell asleep.

He rubbed at his eyes, and the world around him was blurry as he struggled to open his eyes. Then, suddenly, a firm grip took hold of his chin, and he sputtered out a few words in surprise. Eyes widening and finally seeing, he caught sight of Soobin seemingly glaring at him.

“What happened to your face?”

“Huh?”

“You have this—” Soobin reached out with gentle fingers that tickled over the skin on the side of Yeonjun’s face, “—is that a bruise?”

Yeonjun slammed his own hand into the spot Soobin was talking about, only to realise the skin was very sore and cried out in surprise. The memory of his face hitting the floor appeared like a flash in his mind, and he quickly tried to downplay it to Soobin. “Oh! Yeah, I hit my face yesterday, it’s nothing to worry about.”

Relief washed over Yeonjun as he realised the serious look in Soobin’s eyes was not anger directed at him, but at the situation at hand. “You didn’t tell me you got hurt.”

“Binnie, I’m fine. It’s a bruise, it will go away in a few days.” He smiled at the alpha, grateful for the concern. “It was worth it, anyways. Now the other boys are home with their families, finally free.”

Soobin let out a sigh. “You’re lucky you’re fine. I would’ve been so mad at you if you got yourself badly hurt in this mission.”

He stuck out his tongue at Soobin, then said, “I’m pretty sure you’d be worried out of your mind, rather than mad, if I’d hurt myself. No need to pretend, you sappy alpha.”

For some reason, his words seemed to absolutely stun Soobin, who’s mouth fell open for several seconds. Yeonjun contemplated joking about him gaping like a fish but thought better of it when Soobin’s scent shifted. He didn’t know what it meant when the incense turned darker, and just tilted his head looking at Soobin.

After some time, Soobin coughed and looked away, rubbing at his neck absentmindedly.

“Um, mom will probably want to leave soon,” he said, standing from the bed. “So, get up and get dressed, please.”

With a sigh, Yeonjun threw the covers off and got out of bed. Glancing at Soobin, he saw the younger man scrunch up his nose, almost as if he was smelling something foul, and at first it confused him. Then he saw the way Soobin was glancing guiltily at him, and he instantly flushed in shame at the thought of him being the cause of that.

He discretely tried smelling himself to see if he was still disgusting since yesterday. Even if he didn’t feel like he smelled worse than normal, he didn’t trust his senses right now and bit his lip in shame. “Maybe I should, uh, get a quick shower before we go,” he blurted, avoiding Soobin’s eyes as he quickly hurried off to the bathroom.

While in there, he made sure to scrub himself so thoroughly that there was no way he’d catch Soobin scrunching up his nose in disgust around him again. The mere thought of Soobin and his sensitive alpha nose being able to smell any possible grime that must’ve lingered on his made him cringe.

Then another possibility hit him. What if Soobin simply reacted like that because of his now stronger scent... fuck, for some reason that thought alone made him want to go lay in a corner and cry.

Just like his first shower yesterday, he avoided so much as glimpsing at himself in the mirror. He knew it was stupid to ignore looking at himself, especially now that everything had cooled down, but it was just… hard. Not only because of the whole omega thing, but also because everything he went through in that place left him scarred. Literally and figuratively. And he was not yet ready to face that trauma head on.

When he finally got out of the shower, at least twenty minutes had passed. Soobin was listening to some music on his phone, sitting comfortably on the newly made bed as he waited.

Yeonjun quickly got dressed behind Soobin’s back, throwing on the first hoodie and pair of pants he got his hands on. They were Soobin’s clothes, and so of course they smelled just like Soobin. That fact alone made the bubbling worry in his chest settle down for once.

He stepped over to where Soobin was sitting and threw his arms lazily around Soobin’s neck in a sloppy hug.

“How come you’re not in school today?” he asked, ignoring the way Soobin seemed to freeze at his touch instead of melt like he used to. “Isn’t it Wednesday today?”

“I’m skipping today,” Soobin answered simply, turning his head away as if he didn’t want to look at Yeonjun.

Ouch. Yeonjun took the hint and removed himself from Soobin’s back, going around the couch to sit on the arm rest instead. He hoped he wasn’t annoying Soobin or anything and tried to just act normal. “You’re skipping? You know you don’t have to babysit me and come with me to the doctor, Soobin-ah.”

Worried eyes met Yeonjun’s. He looked like he had a lot to say suddenly, but bit it all back and took a deep breath. “I know,” he said instead, calmly. “But I want to. I don’t want you to be alone.”

Yeonjun could feel the sincerity in Soobin’s words in a way he’d never had before. It dawned on him later that this was what Taehyun always talked about, how werewolves perceived feelings through their senses.

“Thank you, Soobin-ah,” he said, and then that was that. No arguing over how Soobin skipping class to go with him was a stupid choice, because they were on the same page for once. Deep down, Yeonjun didn’t stand the thought of being left alone, and Soobin seemed to hate the thought of leaving him alone even more.

A few minutes before twelve, they went downstairs, and Soobin packed a bag with stuff from the kitchen while Yeonjun told his mom that they were ready.

“Hey, you should have this.”

Yeonjun, just finishing tying his shoes, straightened his back and saw Soobin holding what turned out to be his phone.

“Wha—how do you have this!?” Yeonjun reached out to grab it immediately, turning the thing over in his hands in awe.

The screen was cracked, but other than that, his phone looked the same as he remembered. When he touched the screen, it lit up like usual and showed the familiar background picture of him and Soobin from about a year ago. Soobin must’ve charged it for him.

“The police found it,” Soobin explained. “And, I don’t know, when your parents didn’t want to pick it up after the case was put on hold, I asked if I could keep it safe for when you returned. They didn’t have any use for it, so I got hold of it eventually.”

For when you returned. It warmed Yeonjun’s heart to hear Soobin speak like that, as if he’d never even had the thought that Yeonjun wouldn’t return alive.

“Speaking of your parents,” Soobin said before Yeonjun got the chance to answer, while he went to put on his own shoes, “have you considered calling them?”

Staring down at his phone, Yeonjun considered it now. “I guess I should but… I don’t know, I just feel weird about it.” He shrugged in fake nonchalance. “Like, what do I even say to them? ‘Hey, I was kidnapped and somehow turned into an omega, but now I’m back, please don’t hate me?’”

“Why would they hate you?” Soobin asked, and it surprised Yeonjun that Soobin was genuinely confused.

Oh, right. Maybe his mom had never spoken about what she thought about their country’s ‘werewolf issues’ in front of Soobin. In fact, she had always been sweet to him and Taehyun, and she’d always say that the two of them were an exception because they were young or because she knew they were sweet boys.

But Yeonjun knew that his mom had issues with werewolves. His dad was more of a grey area. Yeonjun knew he didn’t share the same views as his mom, but his dad was mostly quiet about everything. He wasn’t the type to speak up about what he thought was wrong, and that could be a problem as well, sometimes.

“It’s complicated,” he ended up answering Soobin, not feeling like diving into that black hole right now.

When Soobin’s mom called on them from outside, having pulled the car into the driveway, they left the house and the conversation behind for now.

In the car, Soobin pulled out a pair of sandwiches from the bag he’d packed. They ate mostly in silence, with Yeonjun occasionally answering Soobin’s mom’s questions.

After perhaps half the ride, when he’d swallowed down the last of his sandwich long ago, Yeonjun gathered his courage to ask Soobin’s mom if maybe she could call his parents for him.

“You haven’t talked to them yet?” was her answer. Yeonjun felt the weight of both her and Soobin’s eyes on him and focused his gaze on the road ahead.

“I don’t know how to. I don’t want them to react badly…”

“I know you’re going through a lot, Sweetie,” Soobin’s mom said, “but don’t you think your parents would want to hear it from you?”

Maybe she was right, but Yeonjun was a coward. “I don’t know,” he whispered. “But I don’t think I can. Not right now.”

She looked at him through the rear-view mirror for several long seconds before sighing. “Okay, dear. I will call them. Should I tell them you want them to come see you or not?”

“They can come,” he said without thinking. Sure, his relationship with his parents could be rocky, but he couldn’t deny that he still needed their comfort.

Not long thereafter, they arrived at the hospital. Soobin’s mom had to park the car and head off to her department at the hospital, so she dropped them off outside. Before she left, she promised she would call Yeonjun’s parents on her way out.

Soobin and Yeonjun ended up sitting in a half full waiting room. As soon as the receptionist told them to sit down and wait, Yeonjun’s nerves flared up. He hadn’t realised he would be scared to meet a doctor before now, but just the thought of going in a hospital room and having someone examining him suddenly felt very daunting.

It didn’t take long before Soobin noticed Yeonjun’s nervousness. “Don’t worry, Hyung.”

Yeonjun hummed, but he couldn’t meet Soobin’s eyes. It took about two minutes more of them waiting until Yeonjun’s name was called and the two of them followed a nurse through the corridors.

As they walked, Yeonjun clung to Soobin tightly, clenching his teeth in obvious discomfort.  

“You okay?” Soobin asked, looking at him sideways.

“Peachy,” Yeonjun answered, his voice strained.

“If you want to leave, we can go now.” Soobin gently put his hand on top of Yeonjun’s that was gripping his bicep with too much force. “Just say the word.”

Once again, he could sense the calming pheromones Soobin was exuding, although they were weaker than normally since they were in a public space. Yeonjun chuckled and gave Soobin a small smile. “No, it’s fine,” he took a deep breath. “I’m fine. As long as you’re here, I’m fine.”

They shared a look, and Soobin squeezed Yeonjun’s hand. “I won’t go anywhere.”

The nurse guided them into a room, closing the door behind them. There was already a woman in there, sitting in a chair reading something on a computer. When she heard them enter, she got to her feet and faced them.

“Hello,” she said, smiling. She was a short woman in her late thirties, with black hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. “I am Doctor Lee. Which one of you is Choi Yeonjun?”

“Me,” Yeonjun said unenthusiastically.

“Nice to meet you, Yeonjun. Please sit down.”

As Yeonjun got on the bed, the paper crinkling underneath him, the doctor turned to Soobin. “So, you must be Choi Soobin.” Soobin nodded. “I’ve known your mother since before I got my license.” She turned her head, and her gaze fell on Yeonjun again. It made him want to fold in on himself, but he forced himself to not react. “She filled me in on what she knew about the peculiar case that is you, Yeonjun.

“Since we know very little of your state,” she continued, “I would like to do a very thorough walk-through of your health today. Will you be okay with that?”

“Y-yeah. As long as Soobin can stay.”

Doctor Lee gave him a knowing look. “He can stay as long as he likes. Now, I would like you to answer a few questions for me.”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The questions were many and intricate. At first it was fine, just simple questions about his general health today and before he was kidnapped. There wasn’t much to say. Sure, he was exhausted and weak, but all in all he felt pretty okay, considering.

But when the more intricate questions about his health came, it quickly got worse.

In his mind, he went back to the time when Mr X first examined him, forcing a needle into his throat just to get him to start talking. As soon as he made the comparison in his mind, he started to feel the panic building up, and the only thing that kept him stable was the fact that Soobin was squeezing his hand.

It didn’t get much better, because after the questions came the tests. The moment a syringe was brought out, Yeonjun tensed up and moved back, heart racing in his chest.

Memories of pain and a drugged mind came to him, and there seemed to be no calming him down. Even Doctor Lee’s reassuring words that he was completely safe didn’t reach his panic induced mind.

“You’re okay,” a soothing voice whispered right into his ear a moment before Yeonjun was doused in an overwhelming wave of pheromones that made his body go pliant. At first, that too induced panic in him, until a more potent sense of Soobin reached him.

Soobin’s scent was his new favourite smell in the whole world. It baffled him that he’d been living without knowing how special Soobin’s scent was, and now that he knew it, he was going to cherish it for the rest of his life.

“Thank you,” he muttered against Soobin’s chest, where the other was holding him in a tight embrace.

It continued like this, Soobin staying close to Yeonjun to give him comfort as Doctor Lee did her best to run the tests on Yeonjun without triggering his trauma too much. They had to take breaks because Yeonjun was going through it, so they ended up staying at the hospital for many long hours.

After four hours, Soobin received a text from his mother that told them she had talked to Yeonjun’s parents, and apparently, they had driven all the way to Seoul immediately and were coming to see him.

“She’s warning us,” Yeonjun joked as he read the text over Soobin’s shoulder.

“More like giving a heads up,” Soobin said, giving Yeonjun a Look. 

Normally, visiting hours wasn’t until late evening. Unfortunately, everything about Yeonjun’s case was an exception, and so Doctor Lee allowed Yeonjun’s parents to come see their son as soon as they arrived.

When the door was pushed open, Yeonjun braced himself, once again grabbing Soobin’s hand for comfort. He could tell Soobin wanted to move away, to give space for his parents, but Yeonjun wouldn’t let him.

Yeonjun’s mother started crying the moment she came through the door and saw him. She rushed to his side and pulled him into a hug, an awkward one considering she was standing, and he was sitting. Behind her, his dad approached more carefully, coming to stand by Yeonjun side without scaring him. He gave a nod as acknowledgement to Soobin before turning his full focus on Yeonjun.

“My sweet, sweet boy,” Yeonjun’s mother mumbled to him as she kept crying and holding him. “We were so worried, so worried.” She moved back then and stood looking down at Yeonjun with her arms still partly around him. “You should have listened to my warnings, and this wouldn’t have happened. Didn’t I tell you to be careful around them?”

Yeonjun’s blood ran cold in an instant. “Mom,” he said. “It wasn’t even werewolves that kidnapped me, it was—”

“Let’s not discuss this matter now, boy,” Yeonjun’s dad said, breaking off what was clearly bound to become an argument if allowed to continue. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is that you’re here, that you’re safe.” He reached his hand out, taking Yeonjun’s cheek in his grasp.

As always when his dad showed the slightest bit of affection, Yeonjun melted, and suddenly he was completely incapable of speaking because all he could do was stare at his dad in awe.

If it hadn’t been for Doctor Lee, he might’ve continued to do so all night.

“I’m sorry, but Yeonjun is due for an X-ray in five minutes.” Yeonjun’s eyes flitted over to her, and it was only then he managed to shake himself out of that weird mindset. “You’re free to come, but I would advise you not to interrupt my work. It’s important that we run all the tests to ensure Yeonjun’s health.”

There was no way his parents could refuse that, so they all ended up going to the X-ray. It was a quick ordeal, and not long thereafter they were back in the same room.

Yeonjun hated how after his parents arrived, he wasn’t given a single break from the tests. He’d gotten acclimatised to them by now, but he still wished for some time to just breathe—and more importantly, to get a moment to spend with Soobin.

Even though the alpha was there with him the whole time—keeping his promise not to leave his side—he was staying at the edge of the room, too far for Yeonjun to touch him or even look at him without the rest of the people in the room noticing. 

Come early evening, Taehyun came to visit at well. At that point, there were four visitors in the small, cramped room, since his parents refused to leave the room. It was getting too crowded, and it was affecting Yeonjun’s mood.

He would much rather kick his parents out than his friends, but he was too scared to say the words. His mom would surely not take it well.

“Taehyun-ah, I’m starving,” Soobin said after Yeonjun had been contemplating escaping for at least the last ten minutes. “Let’s check out the cafeteria, shall we?”

Yeonjun straightened in his seat, locking eyes with Soobin in clear panic.

No! he wanted to say. Please don’t leave me.

Judging by the pitiful look he got from Soobin, he was understood very well.

You’ll be fine. It’s just your parents. I’ll be back before you notice.

Yeonjun was no mind reader, but he was pretty sure that’s what Soobin’s eyes were trying to tell him.

Despite having been the one to suggest leaving, Soobin waited for confirmation from Yeonjun. To everyone else in the room, it must’ve looked weird, the way the two of them were having a silent conversation while staring at each other.

Eventually, Yeonjun gave in. He knew Soobin was right; it was just his parents. He had no reason to be so spooked at the thought of spending time with them, especially not after they’d been so happy to see him. Sure, his mom could’ve thought her words through before saying them earlier, but it hadn’t been as bad as it could have.

With a sigh, he gave Soobin the nod he awaited. Soobin smiled back and finally removed his gaze from Yeonjun, bowing in tiny to the adults in the room before he and Taehyun slipped out of the room.

Yeonjun sucked in the biggest gulp of air, stealthing himself.  

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Soobin and Taehyun were still gone when Doctor Lee finished up the health check on him. There were many tests that needed analysing before they could get the results back, but Doctor Lee assured Yeonjun that there was nothing big to be concerned about. That was something, at least. He would simply have to wait a few days to get the full report about what his insides had to tell.

Eventually, Doctor Lee gave them permission to leave, and Yeonjun exited the hospital room behind his parents. He texted his friends, asking them where they were. When they didn’t find them in the cafeteria, he sent another text, with lots of question marks.

Surprisingly, a minute after his last text was sent, Soobin and Taehyun entered the cafeteria, coming from the same direction as the hospital rooms lay. Yeonjun stared at them in confusion as they approached him, wondering where the hell they had been.

Unsurprisingly, Yeonjun’s eyes found Soobin and focused entirely on him and how he was walking with his head hung low behind Taehyun. As soon as they were close enough to smell, Yeonjun could tell that there was something off with his scent, some kind of edge that Yeonjun couldn’t quite figure out what it meant. His face also looked worn, eyes slightly red, almost as if he had been—

“What did the doctor say?” Taehyun asked abruptly, bringing Yeonjun’s attention over to him.

“Uh, most of the test results will get back in a few days, but she said from what she could see right now, I’m mostly healthy.”

Soobin nodded, still not meeting Yeonjun’s eyes. Next to him, Taehyun was grinning.

“That’s good to hear, Hyung! Have you told Kai and Beomgyu?”

“Oh! No, I didn’t, but maybe I should.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they’re wondering how you’re doing.”

After sending a quick text to Kai and Beomgyu, Yeonjun heard his name being called from somewhere behind him. He knew without looking that it was his mother, impatient as ever.

Soobin suddenly looked up, his eyes concerned as he locked onto Yeonjun’s gaze.

“Um, so, my parents want to take me out for dinner,” he said to his friends, a sheepish look spreading on his face. Soobin frowned and looked like he wanted to say something, but Yeonjun didn’t let him. “It’s fine, Bin-ah. It’ll only be for tonight, and then they’ll probably head back home.” He glanced over his shoulder, where he could see his parents standing a few meters away, clearly waiting for him. Turning back to his friends, he gave Soobin a flashing smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah.” Soobin nodded, and Yeonjun could swear he saw Taehyun roll his eyes next to him. He wondered what that was about. “Yeah. Tomorrow, then.”

He bid his friends goodbye after that and walked back to his parents. From how these last fifteen minutes since his friends left them alone went, he could just tell that his evening was about to get real awkward.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Dinner with his parents was… an interesting affair, to say the least.

First of all, they didn’t even factor in that it might be courteous of them to let him choose what kind of food he wanted. Yeonjun had been starved and fed cold, stale food for weeks, so his stomach was not accustomed to full course meals yet, but he had no choice but to accept it because his mom had already made the booking.

Then the dinner itself had been tension-filled, to say the least.

Sure, it was nice, in a way, to spend some time with them. Normally he didn’t see them more than 2-3 times a year, so he was happy that they cared enough to stay around. But since his mom seemed keen on always bringing up topics that Yeonjun didn’t feel much like talking about—like how he’d been kidnapped when she’d warned him about it—there was an uncomfortable air between them the entire dinner.

It lasted for about 2 hours, which felt both long and short at the same time. Afterwards, his parents were kind enough to drop him off back home. Apparently, they had booked a hotel night—which actually was a relief to hear, because Yeonjun wasn’t sure if he could stand spending the rest of the night with them if they’d wanted to stay the night at his apartment.

The moment Yeonjun found himself back at his apartment, he suddenly felt very empty.

It was too quiet. His hearing was better, so some of the small things that could always be heard around his apartment was enhanced, like the clock on his wall or the ventilation above his bed. But these small sounds only enhanced the silence, the fact that he was completely and utterly alone right now.

He hadn’t been alone in a long time. Not completely. When he was locked up, he’d always had the other boys around, always had someone to talk to or someone that would listen to his cries. And since he escaped, he’d had Soobin around almost constantly. Not having him by his side right now almost made him call Soobin in desperation and ask him to come over. For the sake of his pride, though, he refrained from doing so.

Sitting on his bed, Yeonjun stared blankly at his wall filled with pictures. Memories from many happy moments in his life cluttered the wall, ones that never failed to bring him joy. Tonight, however, his eyes were unseeing, his mind filled with nothingness. 

In the quiet of his apartment, his ears were ringing.

The last 24 or so hours had been crazy, so hectic that he hadn’t had time to stop and think. There had been too much going on, and Yeonjun had happily pushed all his thoughts and worries to the back of his mind during that time.

Now, in the peace and quiet in his apartment, it hit him at full force.

He was a werewolf. His body was changed, against his will, and there was no going back. The change was permanent, and he had to live the rest of his life as an omega.

What a crazy thought.

He had asked Doctor Lee as many questions as he had dared about whether there would be a way to go back—not that he necessarily was desperate to change back, but because he needed to know—and that’s when she gave him the hard truth. There were no measures that she knew of that could return his body to what it used to be.

What was worse was when she told him that his body was still changing. His body wasn’t fully omegan yet, she’d said—whatever that meant, he had no idea—and while she wasn’t certain, her guess was that his body would continue to adapt until it settled permanently.

Her guess was based on what Yeonjun had told him of the process, of what he remembered from the time Mr X started giving him the injections, so there was no way of knowing the full truth.

Only time would tell.

It was going to take time for him to really let it sink in. So far, it felt mostly like a dream, like he was just living a nightmare that he would surely wake from any moment.

It felt like his body wasn’t his anymore. He had never experienced something like that, being uncomfortable in his own skin and having no way of changing it. The mere thought that it was going to get worse, that it was possible that his body would go through even more changes, made him freeze up in panic.

What changes did she even mean? Werewolves didn’t look that different to humans, so could their bodies really be that different? The changes he’d gone through already had been quite drastic, with his enhanced senses, but since then he had barely noticed anything new.

For a moment, he considered asking his friends about it. They knew how werewolves’ bodies worked. The thought of asking them was mortifying, and besides, they probably didn’t know how humans’ bodies worked and wouldn’t be able to tell him what changes he should expect anyways.

As he was sitting there, his mind running wild, he realized that with everything that had happened these last couple of days, he also hadn’t had time to really look for the changes in his body. He had just ignored it and pushing through, delaying it all to later.

Now later had come. He had no more excuses, nothing to pull away his attention or distract him from whatever truths he could find on his body.

He looked down at his hands in his lap. As far as he could tell, they looked the same. Felt the same. So did his feet, when he wiggled them in front of himself.

On that level, nothing seemed to have changed.

But his body didn’t end with his hands and feet.

Requiring a lot of mental effort, he pushed off the bed and took slow steps over to the bathroom. Despite not wanting to, he eventually turned on the light and then stepped forward, positioning himself in front of the mirror.

Finally, he was looking at himself.

It was, frankly, worse than he expected.

The first thing he noticed was how bony his face was. The bruise was dark, but not as bad as he expected, covering only part of his left cheekbone. He’d lost a significant amount of weight, and sure, he’d felt it in the way his ribs stood out and his clothes hung more on him than normally, but it scared him to see himself like this.

His hair hadn’t grown too much, but he’d say it was edging on too long, covering his eyebrows. Usually, he didn’t let it get that long.

Tilting his head to the side, he leaned closer to the mirror to inspect his skin there. He ran his fingers over the area where the same thick needle had pierced his skin repeatedly. The oldest wounds had healed and remained as scars—barely visible but still there—but a couple were still healing.

For a brief moment, he got the urge to scratch at his skin, hard enough to rip away the healing scabs and replace the scars with markings of his own choosing. It was a stupid thought, and he didn’t know where it had come from. He shuddered as he ripped his hand away from his neck.

There was more to discover, of course. He had yet to dare remove his clothes in front of the mirror, and now that he’d seen his face, he was even more scared to see what the changes had done to his body.

But he had to. There was no time better than the present.

With shaky hands—he absolutely hated how nervous he suddenly was—Yeonjun grabbed the hem of his shirt and just pulled. Like ripping the Band-Aid off, he lifted the shirt above his head. The next second, he heard it hit the floor.

The first thing he noticed was, unsurprisingly, the large, red gashes on his forearms, one on each side like mirror images of each other. He remembered how much it’d hurt, when Mr X cut him. How he’d been too overwhelmed by the pain that he couldn’t even muster up any anger as he saw the bored, disappointed look on the man’s face when he didn’t heal as fast as he expected.

These scars would surely never truly heal. The wounds were ugly right now, so he could imagine that the scars would be just as ugly, if not worse. For the rest of his life, they would be there, reminding him of what he’d been through, what that man did to him.

Another shudder ran down his back as he thought about Mr X. He wished he knew where he was right now. Knowing that the man who called himself a scientist was somewhere out there, likely still working on his research, made Yeonjun unreasonably angry. It didn’t help that he knew Mr X well enough by now to know that he would likely try to find Yeonjun again.

That was a thought for a different night. He couldn’t deal with that fear right now; it was better to just shove it down and hope that it would go away. For tonight, he wouldn’t think about that no more.

Instead, he dragged his gaze away from his arms in the mirror, and instead landed on his abdomen.

His mouth went dry.

Considering all the weight he had lost, he would’ve expected a different result than this.

Turning this way and that, he tried to make sense of it. Why were his hips… like that? Instead of his slim, straight figure that he was used to, his body was suddenly pear shaped, his hips jutting out around a much smaller waist. Gone were his abs, replaced by a soft skinned belly that he couldn’t make any sense of at all.

“What the fuck?” he whispered to himself in the empty room. Why… why would his body change like this? It felt unreal, like his body was somehow… much more feminine than before. Was that it? Were omegas just naturally feminine in body shape? But… they were still men, right? Was… would he… he wouldn’t change that much… right?

In a moment of weakness—or perhaps panic—Yeonjun ripped his pants off. Or more attempted to, as he lost his balance and nearly slammed his head in the sink before he manged to shoot one hand out to catch himself.

His underwear came off the next moment, and he sighed heavily in relief.

His dick was still there, unchanged.

Except…

Something was off. The longer he stared at himself, the feeling of wrongness grew, until it finally hit him what it was.

He was completely hairless, down there.

Not just shaved hairless, the way he usually did it, no. As he touched himself, feeling the skin, he understood it as if every single hair being just gone. Like it had never been there in the first place.

“Why the fuck—”

Another thought hit him, and he lifted his arms to look closer.

Sure as hell, the hairs on his arms were gone as well. After further inspection, he came to the conclusion that, apparently, all hair except that on his head was gone.

Gone with the wind.

It was such a small thing, but it still shocked Yeonjun so bad that he had to sit down. Which happened to be on his knees on the cold, tiled floor of his bathroom.

Absentmindedly, he ran his hands up and down his thighs, trying to get it to sink in that it was his own skin he was touching. It was smooth, too smooth, like the skin of a newborn baby.

Distantly, he felt anger rise within him. This was a violation, a violation of his bodily autonomy.  It was his body, and those scientists had taken it upon them to make changes to his body that would never change back. How could they do that?

Trying to find some solace in his state, Yeonjun racked his brain for memories Soobin or Taehyun’s skin. Were they just as hairless as he was?

He didn’t have to rack his brain for long before the answer came to him. He could recall many instances of them showering together over the years, and instantly knew that neither of his friends were hairless like he was right now. Which meant… what, exactly? That there was something wrong with him? Could Mr X have gotten something wrong with the mixture he injected him with, causing him to lose his hair for no reason? Or was there anything else he was missing—

Wait.

There was one variable that he failed to consider. One difference between himself and his two friends.

It might be wrong, but his mind wouldn’t quiet before he got the answer.

So, it was then that Yeonjun crawled, completely naked, out of his bathroom and all the way over to his bed in search of his phone. He was very thankful that he was alone, with no one to see him in this pathetic state.

The phone was lying in the middle of the bed, so Yeonjun ended up bent over on it, bare back and ass staring up at the ceiling. For once, he was very happy that Soobin wasn’t there right now.

Without thinking much at all, Yeonjun searched up the number to the one person who might help him answer his questions. He had never willingly called or texted that number before, but tonight he was desperate.

His own breaths were the only thing he heard as he waited for the other person to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Beomgyu,” Yeonjun shot out without a greeting as soon as the other picked up. Immediately, he shifted into a sitting position, staring at the dark wall in front of him as he focused on what he wanted to say.

“Um hi?” the younger omega said reluctantly. There was a slight slur to his words that Yeonjun wasn’t used to. “Why’re you calling at two in the morning?”

Huh. Was it that late? Yeonjun removed the phone from his ear for a second to check and… yeah, it actually was that late. He must’ve spent more time dissociating on the bathroom floor than he realized.

“I need to ask you something,” he answered, going straight to the point for both their sakes.

“Well, since you’ve already awakened me, shoot.”

“Do you, um—” oh shit, he hadn’t stopped to consider how embarrassing this was to ask. He had to trail back and figure out how to ask this. “Okay. Uh, do you know if, there’s like, a difference between omegas and alphas, you know, like—”

“A difference between omegas and alphas?” Beomgyu let out a chuckle. “What kind of question is that? Have you not gone to school?”

“That’s not the question I wanted to ask,” Yeonjun spit back, “and fuck you.”

“Yeonjun, alphas and omegas are two different genders,” Beomgyu explained, this time sounding a bit less know-it-all-y.

“I know that,” Yeonjun said, although he had never heard it being explained like that.

“Then what was your question?”

“I…” Okay, again, just rip the Band-Aid off. Just ask him. “Are all omegas, like, hairless?”

There was a beat of silence, then Beomgyu started cackling.

“Hey, don’t laugh at me!” Yeonjun called out, his humiliation growing by every second. “You said you would help me adjust to being an omega!”

“Oh, Yeonjun—” Beomgyu breathed out, sounding like he was in tears from all the laughing. “You’re cute. That was such a cute question.”

Yeonjun grumbled at him but said nothing more as he waited for Beomgyu to calm down.

“So,” the younger man said after several minutes of trying not to laugh, and Yeonjun could still hear the laughter in his voice, “you’re asking me whether all omegas are hairless? Does this mean you’re aware that alphas are not hairless?”

“Do you need to pry so much? Can’t you just answer the question?”

“Okay, okay, I’ll let it slide this time because it’s a sensitive topic.”

Yeonjun wished the little fucker was there so he could whack him in the head.

“The simple answer is yes, I, and like all omegas I know, don’t have any hair below our necks. That’s just how it is. Judging by your reaction, I assume you humans all do have hair, and that you’ve just realized your hair is gone?”

“Yes,” Yeonjun answered, pinching the skin between his eyebrows. This was such an awkward conversation.

“Okay, good to know. I’ve never considered that before.”

“You mean to say you’ve never showered with any of your friends?” Yeonjun couldn’t help asking, a bit astounded that he wasn’t the only one who was clueless when it came to things like this.

“No, I have, I just haven’t had many human friends before uni,” Beomgyu explained simply.

Yeonjun blinked in surprised. “What? But… how? You must have met some humans in school, or did you like, avoid them or something?”

“Yeonjun, I went to an all-werewolf school.”

“What?” Yeonjun repeated himself, this time involuntarily raising his voice. “Those exist?”

“Yep. And so do all-human schools, of course. But I guess they are more common in some areas than others.”

“Huh.” Yeonjun nodded his head as he thought about it. It wasn’t really that strange, because in a similar manner, all-girls and all-boys schools were also still a thing in some places. “Actually, that explains some things.”

“I’m going to ignore that because I know you would never insult me,” Beomgyu puffed, and Yeonjun could laugh at the way he sounded so sure of himself. “Anyways, was there anything else you wanted to ask about? Because it’s actually really late, and some of us need their beauty sleep.”

Yeonjun thought about his hips, but the mere thought of bringing that up made him shudder. He was embarrassed enough as it was. He could just ask Beomgyu about it another day. Or maybe never.

“No, I’m fine.”

“You sure? Because there’s gotta be more happening to you than just that.”

“Yeah, well, for now I’m fine. As you said, it’s late.”

Beomgyu let out a yawn as if to agree with him. “Okay. Great talk.”

They both said goodnight (which felt weird, because since when did he and Beomgyu like each other enough to care about politeness?) before Yeonjun hung up. Immediately, he flipped onto his back on the bed. There, he stayed awake staring at the ceiling for a while longer.

Maybe he should ask Beomgyu to teach him how to be an omega, after all.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next day, Yeonjun woke up to the sound, and smell, of something cooking. For a few moments he was sure he was still asleep, since he was quite certain that he lived alone and there was no way anyone else could have occupied his kitchen.

Then a voice he was very familiar with cursed loud enough for him to hear, and he was suddenly wide awake.

Soobin? What was Soobin doing in his apartment this early?

Looking down at himself, he noticed he had some time during the night snuggled up underneath the covers. He was still naked underneath, but he was very grateful he had managed to cover himself, because it was very likely that Soobin might have sneaked a peek inside to see if he was awake when he arrived.

As he got up and quickly went to dress himself, he marvelled at how nice whatever Soobin was cooking smelled. Or maybe it was just Soobin’s scent, he realized. He hadn’t quite gotten used to people smelling like that yet.

“Morning,” he greeted when he stepped foot into his small kitchen. Soobin, who had been occupied with cooling his finger under the stream of water, jumped at the sound before turning towards Yeonjun.

“Hyung, you’re awake!” Soobin quickly scrambled to turn down the heat on the stove before leaning against the counter, trying to look cool. “Mom told me your parents were staying at a hotel, so I thought maybe you’d like some company in the morning.” He motioned towards the dining table, where a bag lay, and said, “I brought some groceries, so you can stack up. I know I stayed here, but there’s not really that much left, so this was the least I could do.”

Yeonjun’s mouth nearly fell open in surprise. His chest filled with warmth and appreciation as he looked at Soobin.

For a second, a vision of himself moving forward to wrap his arms around Soobin’s waist and kiss him played before Yeonjun’s eyes. In it, they were both giggling against the other’s lips, before turning around to complete their morning ritual. It was a vision of what it would be like to be in a relationship with Soobin, to be domestic and be able to do the small, but to him awfully romantic things every morning.

How he wished it was more than just his imagination.

“Thank you, Binnie,” he mumbled, his cheeks heating up at his own thoughts even though they were completely innocent. He glanced down and frowned at the way Soobin was hiding his hand behind his back. “Did you hurt yourself?”

“Huh? Oh! No, no it’s nothing, you don’t need to—”

“—don’t need to worry?” Yeonjun took a few steps closer, until he was inside Soobin’s personal space. He barely noticed the way Soobin seemed to freeze in his spot, as if he was holding his breath, focusing on the hand Soobin was hiding. He expected Soobin to fight him, so it was with some surprise that he easily pulled Soobin’s hand out from behind him.

“Soobin.” Yeonjun frowned down at Soobin’s left hand, where there was a red mark across the top. “What did you do?”

When their gazes met, Soobin jerked slightly and took a step to the side, retreating from Yeonjun’s touch. Yeonjun stood frozen, hand still held where he’d been touching Soobin’s hand as he registered what just happened.

“Ah, it... It was just—” Soobin struggled to find his words for a few seconds before collecting himself, “the oil was too hot, so when I put the eggs in the pan it kind of splashed over my hand.”

Yeonjun could see that happening. It could have happened to anyone, not just Soobin. Still, Soobin looked like he was feeling awfully stupid about it.

“Does it hurt?” he asked, trying to take Soobin’s worries away.

“It burns a little, but it’s fine. I poured cold water on it.”

“Maybe you should keep doing that—” Yeonjun said, taking an instinctive step closer to grab Soobin’s hand and pull it towards the water. He stopped midstep, though, when Soobin seemed to panic and took a step in the opposite direction at the same time.

“It’s fine!” Soobin exclaimed, holding his hand out. “I promise, it’s okay now.”

Why was he acting so weird? Suddenly, Yeonjun was wary, wondering if he had done something wrong. “Okay,” he said slowly. He kept looking at Soobin for a couple more seconds, as if daring him to keep acting weird. When he said nothing, did nothing, Yeonjun tried to shake the feeling away. Maybe they were both just tired from the last couple of traumatic days. “Should we have breakfast, then?” He turned to the look at what Soobin had been making in his kitchen and found an assortment of breakfast food that made his mouth watering.

“Oh, gosh, I really missed food,” he said as he took everything in. Soobin had obviously been more mindful to Yeonjun’s bodily state than his parents had been last night, having only made food that was easy on the stomach. Eggs and rice and oatmeal served with boiled fruits. Even on a normal day, it would be a luxury to Yeonjun.

And, the best of all—

“You made coffee!” Yeonjun moved towards his beloved Coffee machine, the one he’d asked his parents for for years and finally was gifted after he had passed last year’s courses gallantly. “Oh, sweet, bitter, beautiful black liquid, how I missed you.”

He was already pouring himself – and Soobin, of course, he hadn’t forgotten about his presence just because the coffee distracted him – when he heard something rustling from Soobin’s direction.

“Hyung, um.”

Yeonjun hummed in response, still busy pouring the coffee. Once he’d finished, he turned to look at him.

Soobin’s head was downturned, and it looked like he was staring at the thing he was fumbling with in his hands. From where he stood, Yeonjun didn’t see what it was, which immediately made him curious.

“What is it?” he asked.

“I, uh,” Soobin glanced up before quickly down turning his eyes again. It was enough time for Yeonjun to notice the sudden flush on his face. “I got this… because I thought, you know, since you don’t know how to control your, um, scent, it might be a good idea to use this, for a while at least. It’s, you know, safer as well.”

“What is it?” Yeonjun repeated, still curious. He took a step closer, a bit cautiously as he remembered the way Soobin had moved away from him just before.

“It’s- I… it’s—”

Soobin didn’t seem to be able to form the words. Yeonjun wondered why the thing in his hands made him so flustered and continued stepping closer until he could take what he now saw was a small, rectangular package from Soobin’s hands.

Scent blockers, he read.

For a moment, Yeonjun was stunned. He didn’t know why, but for some reason a feeling of intense embarrassment spread through him.

Soobin had bought him scent blockers. He’d said Yeonjun didn’t know how to control his scent—which, in truth, Yeonjun didn’t even know was something he should be able to do—which meant… what, exactly? Did it mean Soobin found his scent disgusting? Too much to handle? Distracting?

Had his worries from yesterday morning been true?

Soobin was looking at him expectantly, but Yeonjun didn’t know what to say. From Soobin’s expression alone, it was impossible to tell what his intentions with the scent blockers were, and Yeonjun was not about to go and ask him.

All he could do was let out a small, “oh.”

“I thought we could all wear them,” Soobin immediately said, as if trying to save this awkward conversation. “So, you won’t get overwhelmed.”

As if Soobin’s words had reminded him, the smell he had already come to associate with Soobin smashed into his nostrils again. A shiver ran down his spine, a new reaction to Soobin’s scent entirely but not unwelcome.

“Oh.” Yeonjun reached to grab the package from Soobin and taking a step further away. “How do I put it on?”

Soobin eyed him carefully. “You need to put them on top of your scent glands,” he said, watching Yeonjun turn the package over and opening it.

“Aha,” Yeonjun said, not glancing up at Soobin. He put the content of the package on the kitchen table as he opened it. It contained several patches, some big that would likely go on the neck, and some half that size to put on the wrists. Biting his lip, he tried to remember the places where Soobin’s mom had pointed out his scent glands. He cursed himself mentally for not paying much attention when that happened.

Soobin cleared his throat, pulling Yeonjun’s attention over to him. “So, like,” he gestured to both sides of his neck, “here and here, and on your wrists.”

Yeonjun nodded. He realized he might be acting strange, so he tried to calm his nerves and grabbed one. He realised quickly that he had no idea where his scent gland was positioned.

Blushing, he gave Soobin a desperate look.

“Need some help?” Soobin seemed, if Yeonjun wasn’t wrong, a bit nervous as he came closer. Yeonjun gave an awkward nod, and Soobin smiled in response.

“Okay, so you can’t really see the scent glands,” Soobin explained, coming to stand next to Yeonjun. He held up his own wrist, turning it over to show Yeonjun. “It’s like sweat glands, they’re part of your skin, but the difference is that they’re concentrated to a few small spots. Here,” he pointed to a spot a few centimetres below his palm.

Yeonjun studied the same spot on his own wrist. “How do you know it’s there then?”

“It’s usually a bit more sensitive than the skin around it,” Soobin said. He reached out then, surprising Yeonjun as he carefully grabbed his wrist.

Soobin’s thumb ran down his skin slowly. First, Yeonjun felt skittish just to have Soobin touching him – because it was Soobin – but then as the thumb passed a certain spot, he understood what he had meant. A shiver ran down his spine and his eyes fell close.

As he opened them, he didn’t have time to register the movement before Soobin had already put a scent blocker on him. Soobin studied his expression before moving to do the same with his other wrist, before doing the same on himself. “Do you need help with the neck as well?”

Yeonjun tilted his head. The thing was, he knew he wouldn’t find it easily by himself, and he didn’t much appreciate the thought of struggling to put it on in front of Soobin’s watchful eyes. At the same time, he didn’t know how he would react to Soobin touching him here. He had a feeling the neck would be worse than the wrist.

“I don’t know,” he answered truthfully.

Thankfully, Soobin seemed to understand his inner turmoil. “I’ll be quick.”

A minute later Yeonjun stood staring at Soobin’s back as he stood in front of the mirror, tilting his head to get easier access to his own neck. As he’d said, he had put Yeonjun’s patches on within seconds, leaving Yeonjun with a ghost of the sensational touch on his skin as he went to put his own on.

For some reason, seeing Soobin baring his neck like that made something churn in Yeonjun’s stomach, and not in a bad way. He couldn’t explain it, but his mouth started watering, and he imagined how it would feel to bite into the tender skin.

Soobin’s eyes suddenly fell on him in the mirror, and Yeonjun looked away instantly, feeling like a kid that was caught peeping. 

When both of their scent blockers were in place, they went back to the assortment of food Soobin had prepared. Yeonjun tried his best to not act weird, but he felt inherently awkward the entire time because he couldn’t stop thinking about Soobin’s neck and how he didn’t like that Soobin’s scent was dissipating more and more with every passing minute. Sure, Soobin was right in saying it was a bit overwhelming for him, but was that really a bad thing? He really liked Soobin’s scent.

“I need to head to class soon,” Soobin informed when they were both finished and were putting away the leftovers.

It reminded Yeonjun of how he wasn’t even sure what day it was, and he hated the fact that he didn’t know Soobin’s schedule nowadays.

“Okay,” he said, “when do you finish? I’ll probably spend today with my parents before they head back home.”

“Oh? Are they going back so soon?”

Yeonjun shrugged, putting his focus on soaking the dishes. “Mm. They had something planned over the weekend that they couldn’t miss, I suppose.”

Soobin let out a displeased sound. Yeonjun knew well enough what he meant with it; he was thinking the same thing. He had been missing for weeks, and they only had time to spend one day with him? They had other plans that were more important back home?

Well, he had learnt to not expect too much from them, so he wasn’t gonna let it get to him. At least they showed up, right?

“Well, my last class ends at 3; maybe I could meet up with you guys then, if you’d like?”

Yeonjun looked over his shoulder at Soobin, a hopeful look in his eyes. “You could? That would be awesome!” No matter the situation, Yeonjun always felt better if Soobin was there with him.

“Yeah, just tell me where you are, and I’ll come by.” Soobin grinned, making Yeonjun mirror his expression.

When Soobin had to leave not long thereafter and Yeonjun called his parents, he felt less apprehensive about the day about to come. He only had to spend a few hours alone with them, and then Soobin would join them.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Spending the day with his parents had been… more uncomfortable than he had expected, definitely more uncomfortable than last night’s dinner. For one, his mom had immediately started doting on him the moment they came to take him out for lunch. She of course noticed the scent blockers and huffed and puffed about how inappropriate it was for him to wear them outside in public. They weren’t exactly inconspicuous, she said, as if that was what mattered more than Yeonjun’s safety. Even when he explained that apparently (he had asked Beomgyu about it after Soobin left) having control over your scent was really important, or you could attract unwanted attention to yourself, his mom could only see the human side of it. Her view, apparently, was that it made him announce to the world what he had become.

So, he quickly understood that his mother did not like what he had become (although he’d had an inkling about that already). It was almost like she was trying to ignore that it had happened, or like she hadn’t fully let it sink in.

“They talked about you on the news yesterday,” his mom said at the lunch table, shortly after Yeonjun had shut down one of her complaints about the waitress.

“About me? Me specifically?”

“Yes,” she confirmed. “They said that out of all ten of you boys, nine of you would not have any lasting affliction.”

“Lasting affliction?” Yeonjun gaped. Had they really said that on the news? “But that sounds… bad. I’m not injured or anything. I’m… I’m okay.”

“Well, you have to admit that nothing about your ‘condition’ is okay, dear,” she said, giving him a tight smile that he wondered if it was meant to be reassuring.

Yeonjun didn’t know what to say, so he just stared at her. He could feel his emotions rise up and he was sure if he tried to say anything, his voice would choke up.

“See,” his mother said, pointing at his eyes and looking to her husband, “the changes are noticeable even now.” She looked back at him. “You’re not okay, Yeonjun. You should let us take you to your old doctor. A human doctor that knows what they’re doing.”

Yeonjun lowered his gaze, guessing that they were glowing blue again, and tried to focus on stopping it. At the same time, he took in his mom’s words, and it only made the turmoil inside him grow.

In a state of disbelief, Yeonjun looked at his father. His father who hadn’t said a word for nearly the entire time they’d been at the restaurant, and whose face was an unreadable canvas.

There was a slight reaction from him, though, as Yeonjun’s still blazing blue gaze fell on him. His eyes widened marginally, although to his credit, he didn’t look away instantly.

“Nothing’s gonna change, though,” Yeonjun forced out, eyes flickering between his parents. “The doctor said it was permanent, that there’s nothing we can do about it.”

He didn’t know if he’d come to terms with it himself just yet, but he didn’t feel any sort of internal worry or panic about it, so it wasn’t hard to say it out loud. His mom, however, didn’t seem to accept it as easily.

“You don’t know that,” she argued. “That was only the diagnosis of one doctor, and surely a human doctor would see something that she missed.”

“Mom.”

“What? You know it’s statistically proven that humans are more efficient in—”

“Mom, stop!” Yeonjun put his fork down loudly on his plate. His mom stared at him in disbelief, and Yeonjun turned to his dad for help.

“Dad,” he said, desperation in his voice. His dad was the quiet, assessing type, and sometimes he would chime in with strong opinions to shoot his wife down. But Yeonjun truly didn’t know his stand when it came to werewolves, so he didn’t dare hope that he’d take Yeonjun’s side in this conversation.

After a few seconds of deep thinking from his dad, a sigh could be heard before the man turned towards his wife. “Honey,” he started, and Yeonjun’s glimmer of hope grew. “The doctor said his body cannot be changed back. This is how it’s going to be for him for the rest of his life now.”

“I know that’s what she said, but—”

The man didn’t let her finish, and Yeonjun was looking at his dad with awe in his eyes. “You saw the X-rays and the other test results. A human doctor would just show you the exact same results.” He then looked at his son, and suddenly there was a rare smile on his face. “They also said that you were a medical miracle, Yeonjun-ah. The things you were injected with could’ve easily killed you, but you pushed through it.”

An assortment of feelings blossomed in Yeonjun’s chest. He hadn’t expected to hear such words from his dad ever, much less right now. Seeing his dad shut down his mom like that for once made him both proud and sad at the same time. If he didn’t have the same views as her, why did he let her spew her racist shit up until now?

“We are happy that you’re here and that you’re alive,” his dad continued. “We love you, and we’ll always love you.” He gave his wife a pointed look that jumpstarted her response.

“Yes, of course we love you,” she agreed, although Yeonjun sensed there was a ‘but’ that she wanted to add onto that. He didn’t let her, instead he just thanked them and excused himself.

At the toilet, he sent several texts to Soobin, wondering when he would be there.

For the next two hours until Soobin was out of class, Yeonjun tried to avoid topics surrounding his condition as well as werewolves in general. It worked well enough, although Yeonjun was on high alert the entire time. Still, he wished he could be anywhere but there, but he supposed he had to spend time with his parents now that they were there. It would surely be another 6 months until he would see them next.

Soobin’s arrival brought some comfort to Yeonjun. Unsurprisingly, with him around, his mom behaved, and Yeonjun didn’t have to think twice about what he said. Still, the hours dragged on slowly, and he couldn’t fully relax until evening fell and his parents had to leave.

To his surprise, before they left, Yeonjun’s dad pulled him to the side and apologized. “She doesn’t mean to hurt you,” he said, “she just doesn’t understand. I’ll try to talk to her.” Then, even more surprisingly, he had pulled Yeonjun into a hug. Yeonjun didn’t remember the last time his dad had hugged him. “I love you. Please keep us updated when you hear more from the doctor.”

Minutes after his parents had left, Yeonjun was still shell shocked.

Maybe he should start calling his dad more, was his final thought before he let Soobin distract him with cooking dinner.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

Yeonjun stirred awake at the sound of a loud buzzing, only to find himself horizontal and with his head resting on something firm. Turning around, he stared up at the still lit up ceiling and tried to remember where he was.

It wasn’t until he heard a long intake of breath from just above him that the puzzle pieces connected.

“Hyung, your phone,” Soobin mumbled, letting out a startled noise when Yeonjun shot to a sitting position facing away from him.

He had just been sleeping in Soobin’s lap. His head had just been on Soobin’s thigh. How did that even happen?

Thinking back, he remembered them getting comfortable on the couch after his parents left. Soobin had turned on a movie, and Yeonjun had let exhaustion take over. Then… how did he end up sleeping on Soobin’s lap? Soobin must’ve moved him there; it was the only logical explanation.

“What time is it?” he asked, clearing his throat as he turned his head to look at Soobin.

“Almost midnight, I think?”

Soobin sounded just as tired as Yeonjun felt, and for some reason, that helped calm Yeonjun’s nerves. If Soobin was sleepy, that meant he wasn’t too aware of what was going on, and he might not think too hard on the fact that Yeonjun had slept on him.

Not that there was anything wrong with doing that. Kai slept on all their laps all the time. It was just… not a Yeonjun thing to do. He was the Hyung, the oldest, and for some reason, letting himself be vulnerable like that made him scared that everything he was trying to keep a secret would come pouring out.

As if sleeping on Soobin’s thigh would make Soobin figure out about Yeonjun’s feelings for him.

Stupid. It was a stupid thing to be insecure about, but stupidly insecure had become part of Yeonjun’s personality at this point. He couldn’t help it.

Yeonjun was fishing for something to say when his phone lit up where it was laying face up on the sofa table, showing an incoming text message. He was busy rubbing his eyes when Sobin leaned over to grab it, and then they checked the text together.

The Beoms

Hey

You guys awake?

This is important

Hyuka

What? Do you know it’s late?

The Beoms

It’s barely night yet, Kai

How damn early do you go to bed?

Anyways, not the point

Tomorrow I want you all to meet me at 12 pm

Location: Yeonjun’s place

Is that understood?

“What the fuck?” Yeonjun reached for the phone so he could read it more clearly. He immediately started writing out an answer to Beomgyu’s latest text, noticing how Soobin was shaking his head fondly next to him.

 “That’s Beomgyu,” Soobin said, amused. “You never really know what he’s up to.”

A pinch of jealousy started at the back of Yeonjun’s mind as he was reminded of Soobin and Beomgyu being close. He didn’t even know how close, considering he’d been missing for 5 weeks of their history, and that thought might have influenced the message he sent in he chat.

old man jjunie

What the hell are you on about?

Who said we’re meeting at my place?

The Beoms

I just did

This is an important happening, you cannot miss it

It’s not like you have anything else planned tomorrow, do you?

Yeonjun pursed his mouth in annoyance, and looking up he caught Soobin hiding a smile behind his arm as he read the chat on his own phone.

old man jjunie

…

No

The Beoms

Then it’s settled, your place, 12 sharp tomorrow

Once again, Soobin laughed, and Yeonjun couldn’t help pouting at him.

bunnie

Gyu, what are you plotting now?

The Beoms

You will see tomorrow!

Hyuka

I can’t come D: my parents are taking us to see our cousins who live 2 hours away.

The Beoms

Booo

But okay, you can come next time

old man jjunie

What do you mean next time?

The Beoms

Be there tomorrow and you will learn more

Tyun, how about you?

tyun

I’ll be there.

The Beoms

(*^0^*)

With a sigh, Yeonjun put his phone down. He shared a look with Soobin. “I guess he’s gonna be here at twelve, no matter what I say, won’t he?”

“Yeah,” Soobin said. “He’s funny that way.”

Yeonjun grumbled under his breath about all the other things he thought Beomgyu was.

“It’s better if you just indulge him,” Soobin continued. A yawn forced itself out of him, and Yeonjun found the way he tried his hardest to keep it down incredibly endearing. “His plans can be a bit crazy, but he’s got a good heart.”

There was one thing on his mind that he knew was going to sound weird for him to ask, but with his insecurities out in the open, Yeonjun just had to know.

“Did you… you know, grow close, when I was gone?”

“Me and Beomgyu?” Soobin raised his eyebrows. “I don’t know, I guess? He was very comforting, actually, like, he made sure to be around when I was having a hard time.”

“What do you mean?”

Soobin reached out, and Yeonjun nearly jerked in surprise when his large hand landed on his bare shoulder. He hadn’t noticed that the oversized shirt he was wearing had slid to the side to reveal most of his left shoulder, and that was where Soobin put his hand.

With his gaze on the point where his hand connected with Yeonjun’s skin, Soobin said, “can you imagine how it felt? When I got the call from your mom, saying you never arrived that day? And then, calling your phone over and over but getting no response because your phone was dead. I made your mom call the police, and then Kai and I took the first train there. He kept trying to reassure me that I shouldn’t worry, maybe your phone died and you just went to buy a Christmas present to your parents or something. It had only been a few hours at that point, but I knew he was wrong. I felt it, somehow. You wouldn’t just disappear on us like that.”

Soobin’s thumb ran over Yeonjun’s skin, making every nerve end tingle. With his other hand, he wiped away at his nose, bringing Yeonjun’s attention to the sparkling of tears in Soobin’s eyes. He hadn’t expected this to come up right now, but he supposed that the sleepiness had softened him up enough to pull his emotions to the surface.

“Um,” Soobin’s laugh sounded wet, and Yeonjun reached for his free hand to hold in his over their laps. “Yeah, then we went to your bus stop and Kai was the one who found your phone all smashed in the middle of the parking lot. That’s when we knew, and the police came soon after.

“I didn’t know what to do. I guess what I wanted to get to was that Beomgyu was very supportive, when all three of us were a mess. He gave me his notes when I couldn’t make myself go to classes because I missed you, and he called me a lot to check that I was eating and taking care of myself. He kind of held us all together, and I’m very thankful for him. I mean, you and him weren’t on good terms so it wouldn’t have been surprising if he didn’t care, but he seemed affected too, you know? Like, he’s part of the friend group, and it was not whole without you there, so it affected him too?” Soobin let out a less sad laugh. “I’m rambling, sorry.”

“No, it’s okay, Bin-ah,” Yeonjun said, having to clear his throat because he was getting a bit choked up too. “I think I get what you mean. It… it saddens me to think of you going through that.”

“Don’t feel sad about it, Hyung,” Soobin frowned. “I didn’t have it nearly as bad as you, and that’s not what I’m trying to say, I just… I want you to know how much you mean to me, and how much of a mess I was when I didn’t know if you were even alive.”

Yeonjun couldn’t hold it in anymore after that. The tears fell as he pulled Soobin into his arms, holding him dearly with his hands cupping the back of his neck.

Despite both of them wearing scent blockers, Yeonjun couldn’t resist the need to push his nose against the side of Soobin’s neck, pushing against the material of the blocker as if trying to get it out of the way. If he breathed in sharply with his nose against it, he could just about make out Soobin’s scent.

Yeonjun’s action made Soobin freeze for a moment, but before Yeonjun could freak out about it, he melted in Yeonjun’s arms again and giggled. “Hyung, that tickles.”

“Sorry,” Yeonjun said, not making any move to stop.

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” Soobin asked, sounding amused rather than sad now, and Yeonjun counted that as a win, even if the tears were still falling merrily down his own cheeks.

“No?” Yeonjun didn’t even know what Soobin meant. “It’s just nice.”

“What’s nice?”

“Your scent.”

“Oh.” Soobin leaned back a little so he could look at him. Yeonjun wanted to whine as he lost the contact with Soobin’s neck, but then he was looking right into Soobin’s face, and Soobin was wiping away his tears. “You too,” Soobin was saying. “Your scent is also… nice.”

Somehow, Yeonjun got the feeling that there was something else Soobin wanted to say, because the way he said ‘nice’ sounded a bit lacklustre. Still, it was better than Yeonjun’s worries that Soobin didn’t like his scent at all. He’d started to spiral a bit about that particular fact since the morning, so hearing that he had got it all wrong was a relief.

They stayed sitting like that, close and holding each other, for a little while longer. Not saying anything, because they didn’t need to. It was comfortable and natural, and Yeonjun could almost pretend like the last five weeks had never happened. It felt like they had gone back to before—before Yeonjun had disappeared, and before his life had been changed drastically.

When Soobin failed to stifle another yawn, Yeonjun deemed it time to go to bed. They had both already been sleeping earlier before Beomgyu’s text awoke them, so it was about time.

Brushing their teeth together and getting ready for bed was comfortable and nostalgic. Just like old times. Even the part where getting in bed next to Soobin made his heart flutter with nervosity was just like normal.

Of course, much had changed for Yeonjun. It wasn’t truly like normal; he could feel all the changes in himself just as he was lying there, staring up into the darkness and seeing many details his old human eyes wouldn’t have seen. Things were different, and it would be hard to accept. Hard to get used to.

But with Soobin next to him, acting the same as always, Yeonjun could pretend like nothing had changed. And right now, that was precisely what he needed.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Morning came quickly. Yeonjun slept the best he’d done in weeks, and when he woke up he was enwrapped in the smell of Soobin, and a pair of arms. He chuckled at the thought of Soobin closing the distance between them in his sleep. He couldn’t help but wonder if the reason why he was doing this was connected to their conversation last night, about how helpless Soobin had felt when Yeonjun disappeared. It would make sense that Soobin would unconsciously feel the need to hold him close after that.

Yeonjun wasn’t complaining. He had always loved it when Soobin showed affection, which most often happened when he wasn’t consciously thinking about it.

Without disturbing Soobin, Yeonjun reached for the phone closest to him to check the time. It turned out to be Soobin’s phone, which showed that the time was 9:15, so there was no need to rush out of bed.

He caught sight of something else as well when checking Soobin’s phone. A text message from one BG sat at the top, having arrived only ten minutes ago.

A wave of horror washed over him as he got flashbacks to a few months ago, when a similar message had caused a fight between him and Soobin.

Thankfully, this time the message was innocent, just a quick, ‘we will get something to eat on the way, text me if you want anything specific’, and not flirty like the first one had been. Yeonjun stared at it for a long time, until the screen went black and instead showed him the angry reflection of his own face on the screen.  

It didn’t take much to connect the dots. BG. It was Beomgyu, wasn’t it? Fuck, Beomgyu had been the guy Soobin met during the party. He’d been flustered when the message had arrived, and Yeonjun remember how he took his phone to hide in the bathroom, probably when he answered Beomgyu.

Yeonjun’s mind was racing. How had he not connected it before? It was obvious, wasn’t it? Well, at least he already knew that Beomgyu liked Soobin, he just hadn’t known that they had met on such terms.

Yet, Soobin had acted like he didn’t think Beomgyu liked him like that. Had he been lying? Because wasn’t it obvious that there was some attraction there, if the first thing Beomgyu did was ask for his number and flirt with him over text the day after?

Not even Soobin could be that oblivious. Or could he?

Turning his head, Yeonjun threw a glance at Soobin’s still sleeping face. He looked ever so innocent like this, with his mouth slightly open and his cheeks puffier than normal. It was such a domestic sight, and if Yeonjun hadn’t been riled up by his current revelation, he would’ve cooed at the sight. Perhaps he would have taken a number of pictures too, just for safe keeping.

The longer he looked at Soobin, the more his resolve softened. There was no reason to be mad, was there? Sure, Soobin hadn’t told him everything about how he and Beomgyu met, but who cared? So much had happened since his and Beomgyu’s rivalry that Yeonjun didn’t have the energy to continue it, not unless Beomgyu gave him a reason to do so. And since Yeonjun came back, he had been nothing but friendly and helpful.

He turned back around and checked the phone again on automatic. What he saw then that he hadn’t focused on before, was the lockscreen that showed a picture of Soobin and him from a few years ago. They were lying on the ground, splayed out on a picnic blanket where Kai and Taehyun had been sitting if he remembered correctly. Soobin had had black hair back then, but other than that he looked much the same. Yeonjun had been the one to take the picture, and he’d captured a moment when Soobin had been all cute and giggly, his dimples out on display.

Yeonjun stared even longer at the picture than he’d done with the message. It made him feel warm and loved, seeing that Soobin had chosen this one as his lockscreen. He had changed it since the last time Yeonjun saw his phone, before the kidnapping. Which meant he must have gone through all his pictures, going back years until he landed on this one.

Just like that, Yeonjun’s mood shifted completely. Sure, Beomgyu was flirting with Soobin in the beginning, but Yeonjun was still the one on his lockscreen.

Not long after Yeonjun’s wild mood swing, Soobin started stirring awake.

“Hyung?”

“I’m here,” Yeonjun answered with a chuckle, turning around in Soobin’s arms to face him. He watched as Soobin forced his eyes open and blinked sleepily at him. It took him a couple of seconds to completely wake up, and then his eyes searched Yeonjun’s face thoughtfully.

“How are you feeling?” Soobin asked suddenly, dragging his arm back a little so that it wasn’t just slung over Yeonjun but actually holding him in a somewhat embrace.

Soobin was very touchy all of a sudden, more so than Yeonjun was prepared for. When they used to sleep in the same bed, they’d cuddle, but mostly unintentionally during the night. Or it was Yeonjun who was using Soobin as his little spoon. Not very often was it the other way around.

Now to the question, how was he feeling? Right now, pretty good, considering Soobin’s arms were around him. In general? If he thought too much about it, he’d start feeling a bit floaty, as if the world around him wasn’t entirely real and he was stuck in a body that was vibrating at the wrong frequency…

He didn’t like to think too hard on it. Mostly he felt okay. Maybe not entirely normal, but okay. He told Soobin just that, and the alpha sighed. “Just tell me if there’s anything I can do to make it better.”

When they got out of bed, Yeonjun thought about how Soobin was the only thing that was making him feel better right now. He couldn’t say it out loud, but he kept thinking about it as they started their day, preparing for Beomgyu and Taehyun to come over at noon.

Part of him was annoyed that he didn’t know the reason why Beomgyu had invited himself over. In his opinion, they really didn’t know each other well enough for that kind of behaviour. At the same time… he was intrigued. Beomgyu sure was an interesting character, and he knew how to build suspense.

At 12 sharp, Taehyun texted them saying that they were outside. When they arrived by the door, Taehyun came in carrying two bags of takeout, which he handed over to Soobin to bring inside.

Beomgyu came through the door last, and Yeonjun’s first thought was to throw out questions for why they were here and what Beomgyu was planning, when his eyes caught sight of something that shifted his focus entirely.

“You’re both wearing scent blockers too?”

“Oh,” Taehyun straightened after pulling his shoes off, “yeah, Soobin-hyung and I discussed it. I see you’re wearing them too.”

Self-consciously, Yeonjun placed a hand over the patch on his left wrist. Soobin had reminded him earlier that he would have to exchange them at least once a day, and so Yeonjun had spent some time pulling the old ones off and replacing them with new ones. Soobin had offered to help him again, but this time Yeonjun rejected it, as he felt the need to learn the placement of his scent glands.

It had felt weird, to say the least, but Soobin confirmed later that he seemed to have placed them in the right spots.

“Yeah,” he answered Taehyun. When they had hung up their jackets, he led them into the apartment. “Soobin said it would be safer for me, so.”

Taehyun glanced at Soobin’s back where he was standing in the kitchen, taking out plates and glasses from the cupboard. “Yeah, pretty much,” he answered thoughtfully. “I asked Beomgyu to wear them too,” he added, looking over his shoulder at the omega.

“Yeah, I had some laying around at home that I could use,” Beomgyu said with a shrug. “Wasn’t a big deal.”

Yeonjun blinked dumbfoundedly. He didn’t understand why Beomgyu, a fellow omega, would have to wear the scent blockers as well. He’d thought it was only alphas’ scents that would influence him but… had he been wrong? After all, he’d only been an omega for a few days, so what did he know?

The window to ask about it disappeared, as Soobin brought the food over at the same time as Beomgyu deposited himself on Yeonjun’s sofa, placing a computer that Yeonjun hadn’t noticed him brining on the table in front of him.

Beomgyu was reaching for the box of fried chicken that Soobin had placed in front of him, but before he could take one, Yeonjun ran forward and pulled the box out of Beomgyu’s reach. “Ah ah ah,” he said, “first you explain what this is all about, then you get food.”

“You know we were the ones who brought the food?” Beomgyu said, scowling at him and going to reach for a piece of chicken from the box in Yeonjun’s hand. When Yeonjun just pulled it away again, preventing him from getting his precious chicken, Beomgyu rolled his eyes. “So bossy,” he commented. Then, after sending a glance over at Taehyun, he grabbed his computer. “Do you have a cable to connect to your tv?”

Despite still not knowing what Beomgyu was scheming, Yeonjun supplied him with a cable and sat down, waiting for his explanation. Soobin and Taehyun took their places on the couch next to them. It took a few minutes for Beomgyu to get his computer settled and connected to the tv, and then his screen was suddenly showing on the tv screen.

Yeonjun was more than a little confused to see a PowerPoint slide. “What’s this?”

“It’s like it says,” Beomgyu said, pointing at the words on the top of the screen. “Werewolf 101.”

There he goes, explaining the obvious, Yeonjun thought, since that was literally the only thing that the first slide of the PowerPoint was showing. With a confused frown, he turned his head to catch the reactions of his friends. Taehyun was grinning at Beomgyu in an almost proud way, while Soobin’s face held had a look that mirrored Yeonjun’s confusion.

“So… what, is this supposed to be like some kind of lecture?”

“Bingo!” Somehow, Beomgyu seemed to have acquired a pen, which he was currently using to point at Yeonjun. “Now do I get my food?”

Gaping, Yeonjun didn’t know what to say. What was this? Beomgyu made a PowerPoint with the goal of teaching him things? About werewolves?

When Yeonjun didn’t move, Taehyun lifted the box from Yeonjun’s grip and placed it back on the table where Beomgyu could reach it. Taehyun dug in as well after Beomgyu placed a few chicken pieces on his plate, and then Yeonjun and Soobin didn’t have a choice but to join in.

The PowerPoint was left forgotten for half an hour as they ate and chatted. For that entire time, Yeonjun wasn’t annoyed by every single thing Beomgyu was doing. It was kind of refreshing, to be able to join in a conversation with the other omega without feeling the constant need to shove something in his mouth to get him to stop talking.

It took Yeonjun that entire half hour to realize that a big contributor to him suddenly being able to tolerate him was the fact that Beomgyu had stopped his previously over the top flirting with Soobin. In fact, he’d stopped throwing heart eyes Soobin’s way as well. And when that annoying habit was removed, Yeonjun was suddenly seeing Beomgyu in a whole other light.

After they finished eating, Beomgyu turned his focus back on the computer. “Let’s get started then, shall we?” He waited for the rest of them to look at the tv, then continued. “I made this little PowerPoint, with some help from our wonderful friend Taehyun here.”

Yeonjun looked at Taehyun with narrowed eyes, who put his hand on his chest and jested that he was thanking an inexistent audience for the praise.

“You’re probably wondering, ‘Beomgyu, what the hell is the meaning of this?’ Well, I’ll tell you. After I obtained a, if I may say so myself, quite strange phone call from Yeonjun in the middle of the night recently, I had a flash of genius.”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes but couldn’t keep the amused smile away. Beomgyu sure was weird, but there was no denying that he was also pretty funny.

“I realized that it’s probably not easy to go from being a human to suddenly being a werewolf, since a transformation like this has never happened before, as far as we know.” Beomgyu looked at the three of them as if to check that they were following, then his eyes fell on Yeonjun. “It’s pretty obvious that Yeonjun doesn’t know much about being one of us. And I have to admit, my first thought was that he was just ignorant,” Yeonjun narrowed his eyes, but Beomgyu kept going on without being deterred, “but! That was before I realized I too don’t know that much about how human bodies function. So that’s when I thought, ‘it’s not that he doesn’t know the general things about us, it’s that he doesn’t know what it is like to be one of us.’ Because that’s not exactly something you learn in school.”

Beomgyu had them all in the palm of his hand, by the way they were all watching him and listening intently. Yeonjun sure was intrigued, nodding to get Beomgyu to go on.

“Because of this, I now take it upon myself to make sure that Yeonjun learns everything he needs to know to live like us. And that’s what this presentation is about.” A huge grin took place on Beomgyu’s face, making him look young and excited, in a way that startled Yeonjun. “What do you think?”

Yeonjun didn’t know what he thought. He was surprised, that was for sure. “I, um—”

“Beomgyu-hyung spent a lot of time and effort on this,” Taehyun said in an almost reproachful way. His eyes were big as he looked at Yeonjun, as if he expected Yeonjun to react badly. The way he was looking at Yeonjun was almost pleading, as if he was trying to tell Yeonjun that this was important, and that he should be careful with how he answered.

As if Yeonjun would have answered negatively, had he not been there. But for once, Taehyun as wrong.

“You did?” he asked Beomgyu and got a tiny nod in response. “Well, I’m surprised you did all of this for me, but it sounds good, like you’ve thought this through.” He glanced at Soobin for a moment as he contemplated whether to say the next thing on his mind. When he was met by an encouraging smile, his nerves settled, and he dared to do so. “I think… I need it. There’s a lot about this that is new and scary to me, so it would be very kind of you to teach me.”

Yeonjun’s words had an immediate effect on Beomgyu. It seemed that he hadn’t expected a positive answer like that, so he clapped his hands in excitement and continued smiling that large, infectious smile. In that moment, Yeonjun found himself feeling a tiny bit of affection towards him, for the first time ever.

After having been given Yeonjun’s approval, Beomgyu jumped back into his presentation. He switched to the next slide where, in big letters, it read:

The Basics of the Basics

1. Alpha
2. Omega

“For today, I thought we’d stick to the very basics,” Beomgyu explained as they all looked at his slide. “Of course, you already know what an alpha is and what an omega is, but do you know all the small intricacies and differences between them?”

Well, Yeonjun had been best friends with Soobin and Taehyun most of his life, so he’d like to think that he knew more than the average human did. Still, both his friends were alphas, and he hadn’t been in contact with omegas much before getting to know Beomgyu, so his knowledge on that part was probably very lacking.

“Well, let’s get into it, shall we?” Beomgyu continued.

With the appearance of the next slide, Yeonjun let out a loud snort. The title of the slide was ‘ALPHAS’, and so far, the only thing on the screen was a picture of Soobin. Which in itself wasn’t that outlandish. Only, the picture he’d chosen was quite an unflattering one, taken when Soobin wasn’t prepared during what looked like one of their late study sessions. His eyes were drooping and his mouth slightly open, there were bags under his eyes and his hair was standing in every which way.

“Hey, when’d you take that!?” Soobin cried out, sitting up straight in his seat.

“Alphas are,” Beomgyu said, an evil grin on his face as he ignored Soobin, “according to Wikipedia ‘Socially and physically dominant, short-tempered and natural leaders’. Here you see a prime example of an alpha, taken in his natural habitat.”

Soobin grumbled and crossed his arms over his chest, to which Yeonjun couldn’t help but coo at him. He moved closer and leaned his head on Soobin’s shoulder, making a pouty face at him to get him to stop sulking. When Soobin rolled his eyes but allowed Yeonjun to hug him from the side, Yeonjun was content and turned his attention back on Beomgyu.

“We all know that the textbook version is far from the truth,” Beomgyu continued, pointing towards the picture of Soobin. “Sure, alphas can be dominant and aggressive, but that doesn’t mean those are alpha characteristics in themselves. Here, we can see that alphas—” Beomgyu pressed a button on his computer, making a second picture appear on the screen. This one was of Taehyun, who was napping in an armchair. He was curled up, sleeping on the side, looking very cosy. “—can be small and cute and gentle as well.”

“Why’d he get such a cute picture when I got that,” Soobin muttered to himself, sounding almost offended.

On the other side of the couch, Yeonjun caught sight of Taehyun’s surprised look, which he hid quickly by looking away. He wondered if Tae was flustered by the appearance of a picture he was not aware of or if it was the fact that Beomgyu had been calling him cute.

“Still,” Beomgyu continued, his voice once again turning into something similar to a tourist guide speaking, “the reason why alphas are seen as the more ‘aggressive’ or ‘dominant’ second gender is because of their inherent need to protect. Their instincts tell them to provide for their pack, perhaps because they are often the bigger and physically fitter to take care of a family.” Beomgyu turned his gaze to look at them, and added in a less formal tone, “did you know, back in the day, it was actually not uncommon for alphas to provide their mates with their every single need, and they did it without even complaining – they wanted to provide for their mate. To pamper them. I wouldn’t complain if you alphas took after that a bit more,” Beomgyu joked, giving his two alpha friends suggestive looks. Yeonjun knew he was joking, but he still thought the look on Taehyun’s face was priceless.

“Anyways,” Beomgyu continued, and then he dived into the ‘intricacies’ (as he’d called it) of the alpha gender, explaining to Yeonjun the physical differences between them and omegas, that alpha scents often had different tones to them than omegas and what differences there was between male and female alphas. Most of it, Yeonjun already knew, but it was still a fun and informative little presentation. He appreciated the inside jokes and unseriousness of it all, having a laugh now and then when another unflattering picture of one of them had been sneaked itself onto a slide.

After he’d finished talking about alphas, Beomgyu flashed by a slide that said only the word Omega and then just moved past it. Yeonjun tilted his head, about to ask why he skipped it, when Beomgyu explained, “I made a separate presentation about the omega stuff, I thought we could go through it when there are no alphas around.” To Yeonjun’s surprise, he sent a wink his way at that.

So, instead, Beomgyu went over how the colour of their eyes worked, how omegas eyes turned blue while alphas’ turned red. It surprised Yeonjun to hear, as he realized that he had never seen his friends’ eyes change colour. When he commented on it, Beomgyu shrugged and said, “it only happens in very… intimate moments? Most of us have good control of it, anyways.”

Somehow, Yeonjun ended up being more confused about how the control over the eye colour change worked, especially after he asked about how he was supposed to control his eyes if he couldn’t even feel when they had shifted colour, and Taehyun’s answer was, “You kinda just know when they change.”

You just know.

Very helpful.

The last subject they went over was scents, and how controlling your scent was crucial to avoid awkward and potentially dangerous situations. Yeonjun already knew about pheromones and how they could be used to calm others down, but it hadn’t dawned on him that they could be used for more hazardous reasons, like making someone submit against their will.

Yeonjun had no idea how he was supposed to learn how to control stuff like that. And none of his friends really knew how to teach him, because it was that type of thing they’d all learnt as tiny children and taken for granted. Which made Yeonjun’s situation a whole lot harder, although at least he was more aware of how his body was supposed to work now, at least.  

“Scenting,” Beomgyu said, pulling up the last slide of the night, which was showing a stock image of a couple standing close and looking like they were kissing each other’s necks. “Scenting is a very intimate thing for us. I’m not sure if you’re aware of what it means, but I do know that you’ve seen how it’s performed, even if you didn’t know it then.”

Yeonjun was sure he had heard about scenting, but Beomgyu was hitting his head on the nail with this one; he’d never had it explained to him before.

“Essentially,” Beomgyu said when he noticed Yeonjun’s obvious confusion, “scenting means marking someone else with your own scent. It’s done mainly by rubbing your scent glands together, or like in this picture, rubbing your nose against their scent gland.”

Yeonjun studied the picture of the couple on the slide once more and realized that he’d understood it all wrong. Maybe they weren’t kissing, but rubbing against each other’s neck, like Beomgyu was explaining.

With a start, Yeonjun realized that he did, in fact, recognize that act. Not so much that he’d seen it, but that it had been performed on him by none other than Soobin.

It wasn’t uncommon for Soobin to rub his nose against Yeonjun’s neck when they were hugging, or to absentmindedly place his wrist against Yeonjun’s. But whilst he was aware of it, he had never known that it meant Soobin had been leaving his scent on him.

He didn’t know what to do with the knowledge that Soobin had been doing it deliberately. He tried to catch Soobin’s gaze when Beomgyu was explaining it, but for some reason, the alpha was doing a great job at avoiding Yeonjun’s eyes.

“Like I said,” Beomgyu was going on, “scenting can be a very intimate thing. It’s only done between people that share a special bond, with a great amount of trust between them.”

The way Beomgyu was looking at Yeonjun right then made him wonder if Beomgyu was trying to say something more, but unfortunately, he hadn’t yet learnt how to decipher Beomgyu’s looks.

Anyways, he was content with that explanation of scenting. If scenting was only done between people that truly trusted each other, it made sense for Soobin to do it with him. Even so, it instilled a large amount of pride to learn that Soobin trusted him on that level that he would be doing it to him as often as he sometimes did it.

It looked like Beomgyu was going to say something more about the topic, but he was interrupted by Soobin clearing his throat loudly and asking, “so that’s it, right? Or did you have anything more planned?”

The two of them shared an intense look, and Yeonjun could swear it seemed like they were having some kind of mental conversation—or more like argumentation, if judging by the way they were both glaring at each other.

Beomgyu was the first to back down, it seemed. “Yeah, that was it,” he said, sounding a tiny bit disappointed, but the moment after his bright grin was back. “What did you think?” he asked Yeonjun. “Do you feel very knowledgeable now?”

Yeonjun couldn’t help snorting. “Sure. It was a good start, but I think I’m gonna have to think about this for some time before it all sinks in.”

He felt three pair of eyes looking at him sympathetically and blushed. He could tell they wanted to say something supportive, like reminding him of how they’d always be there if he needed someone to talk to or needed help to understand how to be an omega. The thing was, he already knew all that. He knew they would be by his side, and that he didn’t even need to ask for them to offer him their help.

Despite knowing it, he felt embarrassed all of a sudden. Being the centre of attention usually didn’t bother him, but there was something about the way they were looking at him now, like he was some kind of wounded animal, that made him squeamish. It had him mask his still warring emotions by smiling and clapping his hands together, going to speak before any of them could.

He thanked them all for coming and for doing this for him. Then, to ensure they moved away from any uncomfortable conversation topics, he suggested they play some games and hang out, just like they normally would do at his apartment. No one said no to that plan, and they ended up spending the next upcoming hours together. Yeonjun made sure that there was no talk about alphas and omegas during that time, solely because he felt he needed the reprieve.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Saturday and then Sunday passed in a blur. After Beomgyu’s PowerPoint presentation and then hanging out with his friends all Saturday, Yeonjun was exhausted and spent most of Sunday inside while Soobin was restless and spent his time tidying up Yeonjun’s apartment. They didn’t speak about Beomgyu’s lesson, and Yeonjun couldn’t tell if Soobin refrained from bringing it up because he could sense Yeonjun’s discomfort about it, or because he was troubled by it as well.

When Monday came back around, they both found themselves surprised that Soobin had school while Yeonjun’s schedule was completely empty. “I can stay home, if you’d like,” Soobin said when he noticed Yeonjun just stand quietly, watching him gather his stuff into his bag. “I can ask Beomgyu to send me the notes, or Changmin.”

“No, no,” Yeonjun rushed to say. “I don’t want to make you miss any more lectures. I can survive for a few hours on my own.”

Still, Soobin had been reluctant to leave. After he did, and the door closed behind him, Yeonjun finally let his smile fall. Not long thereafter he found himself staring blindly at the television – which wasn’t even turned on yet – feeling strangely unaware of his own body except that it was all jittery.

Maybe it was the solitude. Soobin hadn’t left him alone for long these last couple of days, and now that he knew Soobin wouldn’t be back all day, his carefully constructed control over his emotions came crumbling down.

At least he didn’t full out panic. He just felt empty. And tired. He didn’t know what to do, so he just sat there, staring at the black screen of the television, letting his mind soar.

The longer he sat there, the more his anxiety started to build. Everything that was bothering that he hadn’t had time to think about suddenly came out, and like added pressure to his shoulder they weighed him down. It was the stress of trying to go back to his normal life when his body was nothing but normal to him. The silence from his parents’ side since they drove back home on Friday after only spending one day with him when he’d been missing for weeks. The anxiety that he was missing his classes despite just sitting there, alone in his apartment, wasting his time, and that maybe he’d have to repeat the year and—

Abruptly, Yeonjun got to his feet and left his seat on the couch. He couldn’t keep doing this, couldn’t keep sitting there and bask in his anxieties, or he would slowly tip over into the sea of madness.

He kept his mind blank as he went to get dressed. After many outfit changes (because, unfortunately, the weight he had lost during his time in capture caused most of his outfits to be too big on him now), he stood on his doorstep, bag packed with his computer and ready to go. He didn’t think twice, didn’t hesitate, before he rushed out of the apartment with determined steps.

While he had no goal in mind, Yeonjun soon realized that he was heading in the direction of campus. He decided then that he would go to his favourite café, the one just outside of campus, because it was well-known and comfortable to him.

They had just recently gone into February, and the air outside was colder than Yeonjun had expected. The sun shone down on him and helped improving his mood a tiny bit, but otherwise gave little warmth to help him.

By the time he reached the café, his hands felt like bags of ice and his cheeks bitten by the cold. Not to mention how his insides were a big mush of nervous jitters.

He hadn’t expected that walking on the street all by himself would cause such a paranoid response in him, but the entire way there he had felt like every single person was staring at him. It was like he was back in the same mindset as that time when he’d escaped captivity, feeling like he couldn’t trust anyone and that he needed to run.

When he reached the café, he tried to shake that weird feeling off as he stepped foot inside. The atmosphere was comfortable, familiar, and for the first time since Soobin had left, Yeonjun felt like he could breathe out.

The time was only slightly past 10 am, so there were few people around, and no one seemed to be looking at him when he entered. He quickly ordered himself a coffee and a breakfast toast, before going to find the same spot that he often vacated when going to this café to study. He was happy to find it free and sat down as he waited for his order to finish.

Around him, the sounds of the café became a nice background noise. It worked well to cloud Yeonjun’s mind, and all he had to do to keep from continuing his spiralling thoughts was to focus on everything going on in there.

Two girls entered the café, bringing a breeze of cold air back inside for a moment before the door swung closed again. Their arrival was noticeable to him, not only by their loud laughter, but also by the way the gust of wind from the door brought two very distinct scents Yeonjun’s way.

Despite how he was still new to all this, Yeonjun could immediately tell that they were both werewolves. It was like Soobin had said once, that werewolves just smelled more than humans. After he realized it, he couldn’t help the way his eyes followed them as they went to the counter to order, and he found himself wondering curiously what their second genders were.

There was no way for him to know. He couldn’t even distinguish which scent belonged to who, and the mix of their scents didn’t give any indication what they might be.

What had Beomgyu said? Omegas often smell sweet, while alphas have more refined, complex scents. He couldn’t have been a little bit more descriptive? What he smelled from the girls was a mix of roses and spices, and maybe something earthy…

There was also the strong smell of coffee, which he was pretty sure was just the coffee machines constantly running in the café, but… since people smelled like things, apparently, how would he know what was a person’s scent and what was just part of the smell of his surroundings?

He continued watching the girls until they picked up their orders and went on their way. They linked their arms together as they exited the café, conversing about the next lecture they were having. Only when they disappeared from his sight did Yeonjun shake his head and scold himself for being a creep staring at two strangers like that.

“Here’s your toast.”

Startled, Yeonjun looked to the side and saw the barista standing there. Realizing he had forgotten about his own order, he gave the barista a thankful smile and moved his hands so she could place it on the table in front of him.

Before she left, he was sure he saw her eyes run down to his neck before quickly looking away. Self-consciously, Yeonjun put a hand on his neck, suddenly reminded of the probably very noticeable scent blockers he was wearing on either side.

Looking around, he wondered if more people had noticed. The barista was clearly human, and suddenly it dawned to him that she would be able to tell what he was only because of the blockers he was wearing.

Suddenly, the patches on his skin felt like flashing neon signs, sending out the message that he was an omega to everyone that looked his way. For a moment, he considered putting on the hoodie he had brought in his bag, only to hide his neck away from any onlookers.

Then, the thought of Soobin putting these blockers on him so gently that morning stopped him from covering them up. It reminded him that Soobin had been the one to make him wear these patches, not in an attempt to harm him, but to make sure he’d be safe until he learnt how to control his own scent.

It shouldn’t be something to be ashamed of, he told himself.

After huffing at himself and shaking his head, thinking it was stupid of him to get intimidated by only one girl eyeing his scent blocker (she wasn’t even looking at it judgingly, she was just looking!), Yeonjun dived into his breakfast.

It had been a few days since he came back, but he had still not gotten used to eating normal food. Sometimes, his stomach liked to remind him of that, and this was one of those times. When he was halfway through his cheese toast, the stomach-ache crept up on him, and at first it only served to annoy him. Knowing he had to eat to allow his stomach to get accustomed to a normal diet again, Yeonjun kept shoving down the rest of the toast, thinking he could handle it.

Later, when the pain grew a bit too much, he simply swallowed some painkillers and ignored it some more. It was nothing out of the ordinary, he thought, just part of him getting adjusted to his old life again.

For nearly an hour, Yeonjun didn’t do anything but watch the people that came inside the café. Some of them left directly after obtaining their orders, some moved to sit down just like he was. He made it a kind of game with himself, to try and figure out who was a werewolf and who wasn’t. It was tricky, but fun all the same, even if he couldn’t know whether his guesses were correct or not.

Maybe he should ask the guys if they could help him practice this kind of stuff at some point, so he’d learn how to use his nose for real.

After the second hour, Yeonjun ordered another drink for himself. He forced himself to stand tall and not hide his neck as he stood before the same barista as before, hoping she wouldn’t comment or give him any weird looks for wearing his blockers.

She didn’t. But she also wasn’t returning his thankful smile when she handed him his drink. As he walked back to his seat, he tried not to read too much into that.

Then, he found himself scrolling through a news website on his computer, absentmindedly looking for something without knowing what it was. It occurred to him when he clicked on a few articles and scanned through them, that most articles were human related. There were no indications that what was happening had anything to do with werewolves, and for the first time in his life Yeonjun reacted on it. Wasn’t that a bit weird? Was werewolf news not as important to cover? Or was it bigoted of him to think that there was a difference between werewolf news and human news?

Well, either way, after he had noticed it, he couldn’t help noticing that the words ‘omega’ and ‘alpha’ only came up in two of the twenty articles he read through. He didn’t know what to feel about it, so he decided to ignore it for now. Maybe he could add it to the list of things to ask his friends about at a later time point.

As he scanned over the feed on another news website, his eyes stopped on a picture of a doctor of some sort. There was nothing out of the ordinary about the picture or the headline, but the sight of the lab coat made him react. A shiver ran down his spine, and he instinctively glanced around at the people around him, the paranoia shooting up to the surface again.

For the first time in days, he was reminded of the fact that the police hadn’t found any clues of Mr X’s whereabouts since the escape mission. It had been almost a week; shouldn’t they have found something by now? How was it even possible that one person managed to slip through the fingers of the police when they had been right there?

After they had come back, Taehyun’s dad—who worked closely with the police in his field of work—had helped Yeonjun file a police report about Mr X. He had been assured that they would do everything they could to find him. Thinking about those words right now was everything but reassuring.

Suddenly, he regretted leaving his apartment. Even if he rationally knew that it wasn’t very likely that Mr X would find and abduct him in broad daylight, in the middle of a now crowded café, he couldn’t help the fear grabbing a hold of him at the thought of Mr X being free to do as he pleased.

Was he continuing his research? Was he analysing Yeonjun’s blood samples? Yeonjun didn’t know if Mr X had managed to bring any of the samples he’d gathered during the experiments when he fled, but he sincerely hoped he hadn’t. If Mr X was allowed to continue his research after having gotten successful with Yeonjun, who knew what he was planning to do with that information.

Maybe he should get back home, he thought when his hands started to shake too violently to not be concerning. Quickly, he packed up his stuff and left behind his unfinished coffee on the table.

Flinging his bag over his shoulder, Yeonjun made for the door, pulling out his phone to see how much time was left until Soobin’s last lecture. He hadn’t even told Soobin he was going out, how stupid of him, how could he forget—

Just as he was about to open the door and exit, someone else stepped inside and collided with him.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” A very familiar voice cried out immediately as they both stumbled back, and then their gazes met. “Yeonjun?”

“Wooyoung?” Yeonjun blinked, shocked to see his friend after so long. He looked much the same, only his hair was a bit longer and his cheeks were rosy from being outside.

Yeonjun waited in anticipation for Wooyoung’s reaction. He knew he should have reached out to him after returning from his kidnapping adventure, but he had been too caught up in the mess of it all the first few days, and then he had been afraid of what reaction he would get.

But he should have known that he had nothing to worry about when it came to Wooyoung. “Oh my gosh, Yeonjun!” Wooyoung exclaimed, and then he pulled Yeonjun into a bear hug. It was much appreciated; Yeonjun melted into his arms almost instantly. As he breathed in against his friend’s neck, he briefly took notice of the barely there but still distinctively Wooyoung-scent coming from him.

“I was so worried about you!” Wooyoung said after he’d stepped back, although he had grabbed Yeonjun’s hand as if he needed to keep touching him to convince himself that Yeonjun was truly there. “They were talking about you on the news and everything! Shit, I can’t imagine what you’ve been through.”

They realized they were blocking the entrance as the people coming inside had to step around them, so they decided to step outside and take a walk together, Wooyoung having forgotten all about whatever he was about to buy for himself at the café.

Yeonjun expected having to explain everything that happened to Wooyoung, so he was surprised when his friends told him, “I got a really long text from Soobin a few days ago, I think it must’ve been the same day that you came back? He explained what happened. It sounded like hell, are you alright?”

Oh, Soobin did that? Had he sent texts to all Yeonjun’s friends, then? It felt kind of weird that Soobin didn’t ask first, but at the same time he was incredibly thankful that he didn’t have to talk about it again right now. Soobin must have known how hard it would be for him to reach out to his friends right now, and the thought of Soobin going through these lengths just to make sure Yeonjun would come back to his life as comfortably as possible made him smile despite himself.

“I’m as good as I can be,” he replied, meeting Wooyoung’s gaze as they walked side by side. 

“Good to hear.” Wooyoung’s slightly worried expression morphed into something playful, and he nudged Yeonjun with his shoulder. “Sooo, how is it, then? Do you have any new cool abilities? Do you have like, super good hearing and eyesight and such?”

Yeonjun laughed, not that surprised by Wooyoung’s curiosity. “It’s… a lot,” he said, unable to form a very good response to the first question. He was still trying to adapt and get used to life like this, so it was hard to say how he felt about it. The other questions were easier to answer, though. “You know, I wasn’t bitten by a radioactive spider. There are no superpowers to being an omega.”

Wooyoung stuck his tongue out. “Yeah, yeah, sure it’s not.”

“But—” Yeonjun added, wiggling his eyebrows at him, “I do think my eyesight and hearing is better. Not to mention my sense of smell—”

“Oh I knew it!” Wooyoung was grinning now. “That’s pretty cool, isn’t it? Wait, do I smell weird to you now?”

“You don’t smell any less weird than you did before,” Yeonjun teased, even if it wasn’t completely true. Wooyoung didn’t smell weird, per se, but he did smell different. He didn’t feel like going into detail about that whole ordeal, though, and just settled on grinning at the mock offended look on Wooyoung’s face after his comment.

“Well,” Wooyoung said, locking arms with Yeonjun and pulling him with him (where, Yeonjun had no idea), “do you have time to catch up now? I want to hear everything.”

Yeonjun agreed, only realizing now how much he had missed Wooyoung and his shenanigans. He let himself be pulled towards their campus, following wherever Wooyoung would drag him.

They ended up catching up in a secluded part of the library for nearly an hour before Wooyoung had to leave for his lecture. There had been almost no other people around, and somehow Yeonjun found himself comfortable to talk freely about his experiences with Wooyoung. The other filled him in on anything that he might have missed meanwhile – such as how he’d been rejected by San a fourth time when he asked him out on New Years eve.

“I swear, he’s gonna be the death of me,” Wooyoung had said. But when Yeonjun asked if he was giving up, he had chuckled and shook his head.  “We’re basically dating already. He’s just stubborn and damn delusional, thinking our relationship is like any best friends.”

He had delved into what things he and San had been doing, and Yeonjun had agreed with him. Not really the type of things platonic best friends had going on between them.

When Wooyoung and him had to go their separate ways, he felt lighter than he had done in a long time. Seeing Wooyoung had brought his good mood back and reminded him that he wasn’t just a messy human turned omega who didn’t know anything anymore. He was still Yeonjun, still the same guy he’d always been, even if he sometimes didn’t feel like it.

As he walked across campus, deciding to just go back home since he was feeling quite drained, he couldn’t help the pang of longing as he watched the people around him. He hadn’t realized just how much he missed his normal life until he was staring it right in the face.

Not much later, Yeonjun re-entered his apartment with an occupied mind. He was ready to fall unconscious on the couch, feeling absolutely exhausted after the overstimulation on his senses the last couple of hours.

“Hyung, where were you?”

Yeonjun let out a yelp and dropped the jacket he was about to hang up. Soobin stood in the hallway, holding a spatula which told Yeonjun he was probably in the middle of cooking. When had he come home? Yeonjun thought he had classes all afternoon…

One look at his phone told him he had been out much longer than he had thought.

“You scared me,” he replied as he stepped into the apartment, following Soobin as he went back to the stove. “I went out to clear my head a little, and I ran into Wooyoung and then I lost track of time. I didn’t think you’d be back already.” He came to Soobin’s side, leaning over the stove to try and catch a glimpse. “What are you making?”

“Just some chicken soup,” Soobin supplied. Yeonjun felt the intensity of his gaze, and met his eyes carefully. He didn’t look mad, exactly, but there was some unknown emotion there that he wished he could read.

“Are you angry?” he asked, because he couldn’t stand the tension between them.

“Angry?” Soobin finally let his gaze fall away from Yeonjun’s, and he looked tired when he let out a sigh. “No. I was worried when I didn’t find you at home, but then I, uh, saw where you were, and I tried to convince myself you were fine. I wish you’d told me you were going out, though.”

Yeonjun pictured the situation in his mind, how it would feel if he was in Soobin’s shoes. He could imagine the instant flash of worry when Soobin didn’t know where he was, and with how protective Soobin had been recently, it surprised him that Soobin hadn’t instantly gone out to look for him or called him like crazy.

“Wait, you said you saw where I was?”

He saw the blush appear on Soobin’s cheeks before he managed to form a response to that. “Um. Yeah. I might’ve… turned on your location sharing before I gave you your phone back.”

“Oh.” Yeonjun nodded in surprise, although when he thought about it for some seconds, it wasn’t very surprising at all. “Okay. That’s good.”

“Yeah?” Soobin’s head whipped up. “You’re not mad I did that without asking?”

“Well, no, not really. It feels good, actually, that you’ll know where I am. We should’ve done that years ago.” Soobin looked at Yeonjun as if he had gone mad, and it made Yeonjun laugh. “Hey, it’s not that serious.” He patted the back of Soobin’s neck, a very familiar gesture that had Soobin chuckling in relief.

“How was talking with Wooyoung, then?”

Shrugging, Yeonjun stepped back and leaned against the counter. He watched Soobin as he went back to stirring the soup, occasionally throwing a few vegetables into the pot. “It was good. Same as ever, which… actually felt nice.” He sighed, smiling when Soobin gave him a questioning look. “I don’t know, I guess I’ve been feeling kind of alienated, not that any of you haven’t been very helpful,” he rushed out, making sure Soobin wouldn’t think he had been doing anything wrong. “It’s all in my head, I think. But, yeah, Wooyoung was like he always was, so it made me realize that maybe I shouldn’t focus so much on how I’ve changed.”

“I see what you mean,” Soobin said, his gaze focused on the soup with a concentrated look that was probably more connected to Yeonjun than the actual soup. “I’m glad meeting Wooyoung helped make you feel better. But, you know, if there’s anything I’m doing that is making you uncomf—”

“No!” Yeonjun held his hands out in front of him when Soobin’s eyes widened, startled by his loud outburst. “I mean, that’s not what I meant. You’re not doing anything wrong, Soobin-ah. The opposite.” He wrapped his arms around himself, hoping Soobin could see his point.

“You sure?” Soobin asked, and Yeonjun nodded again.

Their conversation turned more casual after Yeonjun reassured Soobin he wasn’t lying to make him feel better. When the food was ready, they moved to the couch and ate while watching some K-drama that had been airing while Yeonjun was gone, but which Soobin had waited to watch until he was back. Even though Soobin made it sound very offhand when he mentioned it, Yeonjun still felt touched.

“Hey, how’s things been with your dad lately?” Yeonjun asked when they were between episodes. He knew Soobin had slept at his apartment for most of the time he had been gone, so he was curious whether anything rocky had happened between him and his parents due to that.

Soobin hummed, a sound between something thoughtful and annoyed. “He hasn’t pestered me about finding a mate much lately, but I think that was mostly because he could tell how much of a mess I was when you were missing. It wouldn’t surprise me if he has a few omegas prepared to introduce me to when he thinks I’m ready again.” He emphasized his annoyance by rolling his eyes.

“Oh, that sucks,” Yeonjun commented absentmindedly, as he was suddenly struck by a life changing realization. Soobin said something more after that, but Yeonjun had stopped listening completely as his head was ringing with something akin to alarm bells.

What used to be the biggest obstacle between him and Soobin, one of the main arguments for why he’d tell himself he and Soobin were not meant to be, had suddenly been erased. He was an omega now. The argument that he was biologically not made for Soobin did not hold any longer.

He was an omega, and that meant he could mate with Soobin. Didn’t it?

It was like that single thought took over his entire being, and his body became alight with all kinds of burning feelings.

He knew nothing about what mating entailed, only that he wanted it desperately. So desperately that he couldn’t focus on a single thing that Soobin was saying, or anything that was happening on the screen in the drama they were watching.

After some time, in fear that Soobin would notice that something was amiss, Yeonjun excused himself to the bathroom. When he got there, he splashed water in his face several times to try and calm himself down. Looking at himself in the mirror, his eyes flashed between brown and blue, and it was so obvious that he couldn’t control his feelings at all.

Despite how much the possibility of mating with Soobin made him euphoric, the other side of the coin made him extremely anxious. Because this was absolutely not at thing he could suggest to Soobin. Just the thought of it made him nauseous, the fear of rejection burning him from the inside out.

He stayed in the bathroom for a little longer than what was considered normal. He realized it when Soobin called out to ask what was going on and if he was alright. Trying not to alarm Soobin, Yeonjun put on his best acting face and slipped back into the living room as soon as he got control over his eyes again.

As they watched the drama together, Yeonjun tried to keep his emotions in check by not thinking about mating at all. It wasn’t so easy, because Soobin had sowed a seed in him that would be hard to forget.

He kept going back to the thought of what it would take to get Soobin to be the one to suggest it.

He’s straight, he tried reminding himself. He’s straight and he doesn’t like you like that. He doesn’t want to mate with anyone right now, least of all you. Get a grip. 

But with how sweetly Soobin was looking at Yeonjun when he reached for the alpha’s hand, searching for some comfort even if he couldn’t tell Soobin the reason behind his current anxiety, it was hard to shake that desperate need out of his head.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

The next day, when Soobin left for school once again, Yeonjun sat in the silence of his apartment with his computer open before him. He’d been sat like this for the last twenty minutes, willing himself to just write the words stuck in his mind. Why was writing e-mails so hard?

After his time at the café yesterday, he realised just how much he wished he could go back to his normal life instead of moping around in his feelings all the time. If there was anything he could do to get some normalcy back, he wanted to try, and the first thing on his list was to send e-mails to the school asking if he could be allowed to enrol in his classes even though he hadn’t registered in time.  

It took him some time, but eventually he finally got the e-mails out. It was that type of thing that he just needed to get done, and then he could check it off his mental list and hopefully feel a little less stressed afterwards.

There was nothing to worry about. Worst case, they wouldn’t allow him to continue this term, and he’d just have to take the courses the next year. At least then he’d know that he’d done what he could, and he’d just have to accept the situation as it was.

After giving himself a short breather, he moved on to the next point on his mental to do list. He pulled out his phone and searched through his chats to find the person he was looking for.

Yeonjunnie

Hey, I’m trying to see if I’m allowed back in class even though I didn’t register, could I maybe borrow your notes or something to try and catch up if they say yes?

It took less than two minutes for an answer to roll in.

Changbinnie

Oh that’s great man, I’m sure they’d let you

if you want I could go through them with you as well, it’d give me a reason to repeat the content as well

Yeonjunnie

That would be awesome, as long as it’s no trouble for you

Changbinnie

I’m happy to help

Yeonjun had texted Changbin for the first time since coming back yesterday after he met Wooyoung, and it seemed that he too had received a long text from Soobin about Yeonjun’s situation. It had been nice to catch up with his classmate, and it made things much less awkward now to ask him for this favour.

They decided to wait with the tutoring until Yeonjun had received an answer from the headmaster, but considering they hadn’t seen each other in a while they planned a day to meetup and just hang out for a while anyways. Changbin promised to bring Felix, so Yeonjun said he’d try to convince Soobin to join them. He ignored Changbin’s teasing jabs about how it could be considered a double date.

As it was Tuesday, Soobin asked Yeonjun to come meet them after school, like they always used to do each week. They had chosen Yeonjun’s favourite restaurant for the sole reason that this was their first official Tuesday meetup since Yeonjun came back, and it deserved some celebration (in Kai’s words). It was a nice addition to his tiring day, and he thought that maybe now things were starting to look up.

“I e-mailed the school today to ask if I can get into my classes even if they’ve already started,” was what he told his friends when they met up and asked him how his day had been.

“That’s great, Hyung,” Kai exclaimed, clapping his hands. He was in the middle of a shoving food inside his mouth, so his next words to come out slightly muffled. “I’m sure they’ll understand your situation.”

“Yah, don’t talk with food in your mouth,” Beomgyu chastised, swatting at Kai almost like he was his mother. Kai chewed his food while making a face at Beomgyu.

Soobin, who already knew since Yeonjun had told him about his plan yesterday, agreed with Kai. “It wouldn’t make sense for them to decline you. Maybe you can send in some certification from your doctor to support your story.”

Yeonjun nodded, making a mental note to ask Dr Lee the next time he saw her.

They were halfway through the food, and like so many times before, Yeonjun’s stomach was starting to complain. He tried to be discrete about it as he pulled out a painkiller and plopped it in his mouth, forcing himself to ignore his body’s complaints. He noticed it was the last pill in the bottle, and absentmindedly made a mental note to go buy more tomorrow.

“Speaking of school,” Beomgyu said, looking up at Yeonjun as he continued with the conversation, “d’you wanna have that second lecture any time soon? I’ve got the PowerPoint ready and everything.”

“Oh, right. Yeah, sure,” Yeonjun answered. “But… will it be just you and me?” Is that a good idea? He thought.

Beomgyu chuckled. “The two omegas, bonding! Won’t that be fun?” He grinned at Yeonjun’s face. “In all seriousness, though, I suppose you could bring Kai, if you want.”

“Bring Kai to what?” Kai asked, looking up from his food.

“I’m teaching Yeonjun how to be an omega,” Beomgyu explained. “You know, all the weird, gory details about how our bodies work.”

Yeonjun grimaced, while Kai’s eyebrows shot up. “Gory details?” He looked between Beomgyu and Yeonjun. “Uhh, yeah, thanks, but no thanks.”

Beomgyu looked at Yeonjun, his expressing saying: ‘his loss’.

“It’ll be just you and me, then,” Yeonjun said with a sigh. He didn’t know why he was so uncomfortable at the thought of being alone with Beomgyu, since he hadn’t felt as much animosity towards him lately.

“We’ll get along fine,” Beomgyu said, his grin changing into a smirk. “We haven’t argued in a long time; we’re basically besties already.”

Yeonjun glanced at Soobin, unsure how to answer Beomgyu. Soobin just gave an amused shrug; he was probably excited that the two of them were giving it a shot to hang out, even if it was a necessity and the main point was for Yeonjun to learn.

Well. Baby steps.

“Sure,” he finally said, “why not.”

“Great! How about Saturday?”

Yeonjun nodded reluctantly. “Sure. Saturday sounds alright.”

They left it at that, then, going back to talking about nonsense and eating their food.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

When Yeonjun woke up the next day, he had hoped he could have a chill morning and just stay in bed for a while, but apparently the universe decided to be cruel to him today. The moment he woke up, his stomach convulsed, threatening to send him throwing up the content of it onto his bed.

“Fuck,” he whispered into his empty, suddenly very cold room. Something was wrong, he thought, because he was shivering like crazy, and every movement shot pain through his entire body.

The thought of getting out of bed to get some painkillers crossed his mind. Only, they were in the bathroom cupboard, and the prospect of walking all the way there felt like an impossibility for him in that moment.

Ah, he thought as he suddenly remembered. He didn’t have to move; he had taken his last painkillers yesterday. No need to make an effort, then.

For the first 30 minutes, Yeonjun was hoping the pain would subside enough to let him get out of bed and make it to the nearest pharmacy to buy new medicine. However, that had been wishful thinking on his end, because the pain not only did not go away but increased with time. He found himself squirming and rolling around in bed, letting out noises of incredible discomfort.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he muttered, grasping at his stomach as if pinching his skin would somehow make it better.

At some point, he had had enough, and looked around to try to find his phone. With little to no thought behind it, he called Soobin and put the phone to his ear.

The line just kept on ringing. Soobin wasn’t answering, and it sent a wave of frustration through Yeonjun. Why was he not answering? Where was he? He always answered when Yeonjun called.

He tried Taehyun instead, feeling too irritated to try Soobin again.

Thankfully, Tae answered after a few rings. “Hey hyung, um I’m kind of-“

“Tae,” Yeonjun croaked, cutting him off. He must’ve sounded as bad as he felt, because Taehyun immediately changed track of what he was saying.

“Hyung? What’s wrong?”

“I feel like shit, Tae.” A wave of something even more painful than before sent him crying out in pain, alerting Taehyun.

“What’s happening? Are you hurt?”

Feeling too vulnerable to care about his pride, Yeonjun hummed in response.

“Can you take me to the hospital?” he asked in a tiny voice.

He noticed, suddenly, that there was another voice speaking to Taehyun from behind the phone. It was quiet, but he thought he recognized the voice. Beomgyu?

“I… fuck,” Taehyun said. “I don’t have the car, and I’m on the other side of town with Beomgyu. Have you tried Soobin? Kai’s probably in class, he might’ve turned off his phone too.”

Yeonjun took some seconds to breathe through his teeth before answering. “Soobin didn’t pick up.”

“Do you want me to try him? Or call an ambulance?”

“No, please, just call Soobin. I don’t know where he is, he… he doesn’t have any classes this morning.”

“Okay, shit,” Taehyun sounded distressed, and if Yeonjun wasn’t in such a bad state he would’ve felt bad for being the cause of that. “I’ll try Soobin, and if he doesn’t answer I’ll try Kai. But Hyung, how bad is it? What’s going on?”

“Just…” Yeonjun paused to take a deep, painful breath. “Just my stomach, it hurts. Like hell.”

Taehyun cursed again. “I’m sorry, hyung. Hang in there. I’ll hang up now so I can call Soobin.”

That sounded as a good a plan as any. “Okay, Tae. Thanks.” The last word came out as a whisper, right before he hung up the phone. He let it fall onto the bed next to him, his arm feeling heavy after having to hold it up for so long.

With another groan, he rolled around on the bed, trying – and failing – to find a comfortable position.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Somehow, Yeonjun managed to fall asleep and for a short while escape the agony. He had no idea of knowing how long he was asleep for, or how long he would have slept if it wasn’t for the sound of someone calling his name and the door slamming shut pulling him awake.

“Hyung! Hyung I’m here now!” The sound of footsteps followed after, and Yeonjun struggled to open his eyes as he registered who the voice belonged to. “How are you feeling?”

His eyes were blurry with sleep, but it didn’t take much for him to recognize Soobin standing over him, hands held out in front of him but not touching, as if he wanted to help but didn’t know how to.

Soobin’s face was suddenly right next to him, and he realized with a start that he had missed when Soobin got to his knees by the bed.

“Not great,” he managed to croak in response to Soobin’s question, closing his eyes because it was too bright in the room. The pulses of pain starting in his stomach suddenly, and he clenched his jaw and fists hard to try and not let out any sounds because of it.

A careful hand brushed away the hair that had plastered against his forehead, and Yeonjun opened his eyes to see the most scared expression he’d ever seen on Soobin’s face.

“Hyung I—what can I do? Have you taken any pain killers?”

“Don’t have any left… I forgot to buy more,” Yeonjun told him through his heavy breathing. He used all his energy on trying not to freak out from how much it hurt, but it was quickly becoming unbearable.

He dared a glance up at Soobin when the younger placed his hand on his forehead. “Jjunie-hyung, you’re really sick, you’re burning up.” Soobin looked really worried, eyes blown wide, his mouth turned downwards, and Yeonjun wished he could wipe that look off his face.

“It just hurts a bit,” he mumbled, downplaying it by a lot, “I’ll be fine.”

Soobin clenched his jaw when another wave of pain shot through Yeonjun, as if he could sense it somehow. “I’ll take you to the hospital. Can I carry you, Hyung?”

Yeonjun didn’t exactly think that would be a fun experience, but he didn’t protest, which Soobin took as permission. He got to his feet and leaned over Yeonjun, placing one arm under his knees and the other behind his back. Before Yeonjun knew it, he was being hauled into the air. He gasped as he looked up into Soobin’s face, suddenly feeling very small in his arms.

He was about to say something when another wave of pain stabbed his stomach, and his face scrunched up. Soobin didn’t hesitate to move, and he ran all the way out to the street. There, he called for a cab, and not long thereafter the two of them were buckled up in the backseat together.

“How long has this been going on? Did it just happen this morning?” Soobin asked Yeonjun, who was leaning into Soobin’s side as if touching the other helped soothe his pain.

“It’s been. Uh. Coming and going for a while.” He shrugged.

“For a while?” Soobin sounded baffled. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Didn’t want to worry you,” Yeonjun mumbled, his forced breathing blowing against Soobin’s neck as he did his best not to whine from the pain. Soobin stiffened slightly in his seat, and Yeonjun guessed his breath was tickling him. Still, he didn’t dare move in case that would cause the pain to intensify.

“Please don’t do that again,” Soobin said, and Yeonjun thought he meant the breathing against his neck until Soobin clarified it for him. “Don’t keep stuff about your health a secret. I worry about you no matter what, so always know you can tell me about stuff like this. What if you were really ill and I didn’t know anything until it was too late?”

“Soobin m’not dying,” Yeonjun told him, grabbing his arm gently.

“No, I sure hope you aren’t,” Soobin muttered angrily, but he put his hand over Yeonjun’s and squeezing it.

-

When they got to the hospital, the nurses swarmed them immediately. It must’ve looked pretty bad, since Soobin was carrying Yeonjun bridal style into the emergency room. Yeonjun had told him he could try to walk, but Soobin had refused to put him down.

Once the nurses realized it wasn’t as bad as it looked, they were told to sit down and wait for Yeonjun’s doctor to come get them whenever she was free.

“It’s okay,” Yeonjun had said, doing his best to look poised and in control over his facial features. “It’s not super urgent.” Soobin hadn’t been happy about that.

When half an hour had passed, he started to think that maybe it actually was pretty urgent, because it hurt. It hurt so much, the jabs of pain not coming and going anymore but being constant and growing with every breath he took. He knew Soobin could tell, but at this point he couldn’t think about controlling his face and hiding it, because it was just so bad.

“Hyung.” Soobin sounded desperate. “Hyung, is there anything I can do?”

Yeonjun was slowly sliding down in his seat, trying to find any position that hurt less. He looked up, searching Soobin’s face. There wasn’t anything Soobin could do, he knew, but he still felt bad having to tell his friend that, so he said nothing. Instead, he kept looking at Soobin, trying to put his focus instead of his pain; it was easier said than done.

A hand found his where it was lying on top of his stomach. Surprised, Yeonjun glanced down to see Soobin’s hand entwining with his own. The touch sent sparks along his skin, and Yeonjun could for a moment pretend it was lessening his pain. He grabbed Soobin’s hand with both of his, revelling in the warmth of the skin on skin.

“Choi Yeonjun?”

He didn’t notice when his name was called, but thankfully, Soobin did. Before he could register it, Soobin had moved and Yeonjun’s hand was empty. He looked around, feeling disoriented, only to notice Soobin was standing a few meters away, talking to someone. Yeonjun just looked at them, and it took him way too long to realize who Soobin was talking to.

The woman was his doctor, Dr Lee, the one he had met with several days ago for his first check-up on his overall health. She had told him he was perfectly healthy back then, as far as she could tell. And now, here he was, in the worst pain in his life. It felt a bit ironic.

The doctor gestured for him and Soobin to follow to a more private room. With Soobin’s help, he managed to get there, but it was with much effort from his part. When they finally reached the room, Soobin had to lift him onto the hospital bed, which he felt massively embarrassed about.

“Doctor Lee,” he grunted when the woman’s face came into his view. She was standing over him, a notebook in hand that she scanned over once before putting her full focus on him.

“Hello, Yeonjun. Would you mind telling me what’s going on with you? Where does it hurt?”

She had her hair tied up today, which made her look more business-like, Yeonjun thought. Still, the expression on her face was the same; warm and kind and motherly.

“My stomach,” he answered once he remembered she had asked him a question.

She nodded, satisfied with the answer. “Okay, would you mind if I take a look?” Yeonjun didn’t, so he carefully moved his arms around from where they had been grasping as his stomach. “I’m going to gently press on your stomach, Yeonjun,” she instructed, “and I want you to tell me when it hurts. Okay?”

“Mhm.”

She was looking at his face as she pressed her small fingers gently into the skin just below his navel. “Ah!” Yeonjun let out, biting down on his lip to strangle the cry.

“Does it hurt here?” She relieved the pressure but kept her fingers touching the skin.

“Yes,” Yeonjun breathed out.

“How about here?” Her fingers pressed into a spot above his navel this time. Just like before, a stabbing pain shot through him.

“Ye-yes.”

“And here?” Doctor Lee moved her fingers around a few more times, each time asking if it hurt, and each time Yeonjun’s answer was the same. Yes. It hurt. Everywhere.

When she was done, her previously calm expression had turned more concerned. “Okay, Yeonjun. Are there any other symptoms you can tell me about?”

“Other symptoms?” His mind wasn’t keeping up, so he didn’t really understand what she was asking about.

“Like fatigue, dizziness, nausea, headaches, anything other than the stomach pain?”

Yeonjun had to think hard. Had he? “I don’t… I guess I haven’t had much appetite? But nothing else. Or. A bit tired, maybe.”

“Okay, loss of appetite and feeling tired.” Doctor Lee nodded, and Yeonjun could tell she was thinking hard from the way her eyes ran back and forth over the floor.

When she didn’t say anything for what felt like too long, Yeonjun’s eyes wandered over to Soobin instead. His friend was standing a few steps behind the doctor, looking small and worried. Yeonjun wanted to reach out to him, wished he could hold his hand so they could both feel a bit better.

“I will discuss this with my colleagues,” Doctor Lee spoke up suddenly, forcing Yeonjun to look back at her. “There are a few tests we can run, but my first suggestion is to give you a drop and a dose of pain killers.” She turned to Soobin. “I will be back in a few minutes. If it gets worse, call for a nurse.”

Soobin stared after Doctor Lee as she walked out of the room, his expression one of fear. “Worse?” Yeonjun heard him mumble before he turned back to look at him.

“Binnie,” Yeonjun said, wanting to reassure his friend, but failing once his face contorted in pain the moment Soobin’s eyes fell on him.

By the look on Soobin’s face, you could think he was the one in pain.

“Don’t worry, Soobinnie,” Yeonjun said. “We’re at the hospital, remember? I’ll be o-okay.”

Soobin didn’t look very convinced, but at least he didn’t argue. Yeonjun was happy when Soobin stepped closer, coming all the way up to the side of the bed. Before he could try to lift his hand, Soobin had already grabbed it in his.

In the time it took for Doctor Lee to consult any other doctor or nurse that was around, Soobin didn’t let go of Yeonjun’s hand. When she came back with a male nurse, and they inserted the drop and gave Yeonjun the promised dose of painkillers, he didn’t let go either.

As the pain slowly subsided, Yeonjun finally felt like he could breathe again. But soon it made him drowsy as well. Which, to be honest, was maybe for the best. Yeonjun had had a long day, he deserved some rest. He’d been told to stay awake until they’d finished the upcoming tests, so he tried his best to keep his eyes open.

They ran a couple of tests and then deposited Yeonjun back in the same hospital room after finishing off with an ultrasound. Yeonjun still felt the remnants of the cold gel on his stomach, but thankfully the pain was gone. For now.

“You’re a peculiar case, Yeonjun dear,” Doctor Lee said with a sigh. Yeonjun didn’t think that was a good sign.

“What does that mean?” Soobin asked from beside Yeonjun, where he had now pulled up a chair to be able to sit and hold Yeonjun’s hand at the same time.

“It means there’s no other case like him. Which you two already knew.” She sighed again, giving Yeonjun a sympathetic look. “So, you have to understand that my diagnosis on you is mainly based off of guesses, but it’s the only reasonable conclusion I can make from what the tests have shown.”

“Okay…?” Yeonjun said. He began preparing for bad news, because what else could her words mean?

Doctor Lee nodded before finally beginning to explain what was wrong with him.

“We think that your body has been going through some kind of metamorphosis, and that the cause of your pain is because your organs are shifting around and changing. Do you know about the bodily differences between a human male and an omega? The differences aren’t huge, but it’s big enough that you’re able to feel how it’s shifting inside you.”

Yeonjun’s mouth fell open. What?

“Wha—” it was Soobin who spoke first, since Yeonjun was too dumbstruck to do so. “How is that even possible?”

Doctor Lee seemed to have expected that question. “Well, let’s say that whatever they injected him with really did its job to turn him into an omega.”

“So, what can you do to help him?”

“There’s nothing we can do to stop it.” Doctor Lee rand a hand over her face, and suddenly she looked very, very tired. “From what we can tell from the X-ray from today and last time you were here, most of the changes have already happened. It’s been going on for a while, hasn’t it?”

Yeonjun felt like a spotlight had been turned upon him when she looked at him. It hadn’t been this bad since the beginning of course, but if he thought about it, maybe his stomach had been aching to and from ever since that first injection that kickstarted his body’s change from human to omega.

He just nodded numbly in answer to her question. “Okay,” she said, nodding again. “My guess is that the worst will be over after tonight, but since I don’t have any basis for that guess, I’d like for you to stay the night. I want to monitor you, in case anything unexpected happens. Is that okay for you?”

“It’s okay,” Yeonjun answered tiredly. All he wanted was to sleep and forget this awful day. He didn’t want to think about her words, and what it meant, he only wanted to fall into blissful oblivion for a couple of hours.

“I’m afraid your boyfriend will have to go home and come back in the morning when visitor hours begin,” Doctor Lee continued, her gaze falling on Soobin.

“He’s not—” Yeonjun was quick to correct her, but Soobin interrupted him midsentence.

“Are you sure I can’t stay? I don’t want to leave him.”

Yeonjun gaped at him, shocked that Soobin didn’t seem to care if Doctor Lee thought the two of them were a couple. He wanted to grab Soobin’s arm and ask him what he was thinking, because usually he was as quick to correct them as Yeonjun.

She checked her clock, giving the two of them a thoughtful look next. “Normally we only allow overnight visitors for patients in surgery and emergencies…” she paused, thinking. “But, consider what a particular case this is… I guess I can make an exception.”

Doctor Lee left made a last check over him, ensuring that the drip was connected and had enough liquid to supply him with painkillers all night. Then, as she left them alone, it was Soobin’s turn to start fussing over him.

“I’m fine now,” he complained when Soobin was leaning over him and making him turn his face from side to side, running his eyes over him in a clinical way.

Soobin stopped moving, and with his hands on either side of Yeonjun’s face he said, “I was away, and I didn’t answer my phone when you called. What would I have done if—if you weren’t fine?”

“Soobin.” Yeonjun reached up with both hands—careful not to rip the needle out—and placed them around Soobin’s wrists. “It’s not your fault, so don’t feel guilty about it. You heard Doctor Lee earlier, the worst is over and I’m going to be fine. Okay?”

They looked each other in the eyes for several long moments before Soobin’s resolve broke. He let go of Yeonjun’s face, and shifted his eyes to look over his body. “Okay. Scoot over?”

Startled, Yeonjun obeyed without thinking. When Soobin declined the extra bed Doctor Lee offered to bring for him earlier, Yeonjun had expected him to sleep in one of the chairs next to his bed. He hadn’t imagined Soobin climbing onto his tiny, unstable bed he was currently lying on, but here they were.

Somehow, they fit, but for it to be comfortable they had to stay very close. Spooning type of close. To keep his wrists free for the drip to stay connected, Yeonjun ended up as the little spoon, which was quite uncommon, since Soobin didn’t often instigate cuddles. But that didn’t mean Yeonjun didn’t like it. In fact, he liked it so much that for a moment, he could forget about all the bad stuff that had happened today, and just bask in the feeling of Soobin’s arms around him.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

There was no clock in the hospital room, but Yeonjun could swear at least an hour had passed without him getting any closer to falling asleep. The silence in the room was loud, almost ringing in his ears.

He wondered if Soobin was asleep already. Yeonjun himself was staring up at the ceiling, had been so the last half hour, trying to figure out how he was supposed to fall asleep. Soobin was basically pressed against his entire body, and he was sure Soobin could feel every little move he made. In case Soobin was still awake, he could probably feel how tense Yeonjun was right now.

He’d had much time to think during this past hour. Mostly about what Doctor Lee had said earlier about his health, and the most likely explanation why today had turned into an agony-fest.

His organs were shifting around inside him. How could someone not freak out from hearing that?

He wished he knew what it meant. Doctor Lee had said there was a difference between human males and male omegas, but Yeonjun had never been taught this. Or… Oh.

There was one difference that suddenly occurred to him. And when it did, it appeared in his mind as a blaring red warning sign.

Omegas could bear children. Even male omegas, although it was less common that they did do so nowadays, since the birth was such a big risk for them.

Which meant they had a womb. Human males did not have a womb.

Are my organs moving around to make place for a womb?

Without realizing it, Yeonjun started laughing. It wasn’t a normal, loud laugh, but a breathless, defeated sort of laugh that held no amusement. It mostly felt like his body shaking.

“Jjunie?”

His movements had woken Soobin. He lifted his head to look at Yeonjun, worry once again etched on his face. Yeonjun took one look at Soobin’s face, and that was when the sounds turned into full out sobs rather than laughter.

“What’s wrong?” Soobin asked in a super soft, careful voice. He had shifted up onto his elbow now, and he was undoubtedly looking down at Yeonjun with worry in his eyes. But Yeonjun avoided meeting them now by keeping his eyes closed, thrashing his head back and forth to try and get rid of the growing discomfort inside.

“I can’t.”

Soobin gently touched his face, rubbing a thumb up and down his cheek. The sensation was grounding, reminding Yeonjun that Soobin was still there even when he wasn’t seeing him. “Shh, Jjunie. You’ll get through it.”

He wondered if Soobin knew why he was freaking out. Probably he did, because Soobin had always had a way of reading Yeonjun’s feelings very well.

“I know it’s scary,” Soobin continued in a whisper, “and it’s unfair that this is happening to you and only you. But I know you can take it. You’re strong, Hyung.”

“I’m not,” Yeonjun whispered, because it was true. He didn’t feel strong at all, especially not right now.

To his surprise, Soobin’s hand started rubbing up and down his side in what must have been aimed to be a comforting gesture. When Soobin spoke next, he did so very close to Yeonjun’s neck; Yeonjun could almost feel the touch of his lips against his skin.

“Trust me, Hyung,” Soobin was saying, “you’re strong. But even if you weren’t, I know you will be okay. Because you’re not alone.” Soobin’s hand moved to stroke his hair behind his ear, and then Yeonjun was being pulled into Soobin’s arms. “I’m right here, by your side.”

With Soobin’s arms encasing him, Yeonjun felt safe. Soobin’s words hit home perfectly, reminding him that it didn’t matter if he was feeling like he wouldn’t be able to take this, because he was never going to be alone. And so as he calmed down, the prospect of the possibly developing womb inside him felt less terrifying. Awful and weird, yes, but not scary.

Because, like Soobin had said, he was not alone.

And just like that, with an exhausted exhale and a small, grateful smile on his lips, Yeonjun finally found enough to peace to fall asleep, right there in Soobin’s arms.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

For a brief moment as Yeonjun was waking up, he felt complete bliss. He was unaware of where he was, but it didn’t matter because he knew he was in a safe place. He could feel the warmth of his favourite person all around him. Soobin’s scent was in his nose, faint but still there.

As he came back to consciousness and eventually opened his eyes, he remembered yesterday. Next to him, Soobin was still sleeping in the same position, with his arms locked around Yeonjun. However, Yeonjun had somehow turned around in his embrace during his sleep, only keeping his left arm that was attached to the drip stretched behind him to ensure the needle wouldn’t rip out of him.

Yeonjun tilted his head upwards to gaze upon Soobin’s face, only for his heart to jump at the realisation of how close Soobin’s lips were. They were aligned just at his eye level and slightly open, proving that he was sleeping still. The sight brought a smile onto Yeonjun’s face. He could recall their younger days when he had teased Soobin for falling asleep like that when they hung out, and the number of pictures he had saved of Soobin sleeping gaping like a fish.

Now though, Yeonjun couldn’t have teased him even if he wanted to, because Soobin looked absolutely stunning. He had grown up so well, maturing into his features.

There was a different softness to his face in sleep and it was pulling Yeonjun right in. He found that he couldn’t stop looking—staring—at Soobin’s delicate skin, the way his lips curved into a tiny, open-mouthed pout.

The sound of a door opening was what finally brought Yeonjun out of his loving moment of admiring Soobin from so up close. He flinched, not at all prepared for the intrusion, and the movement was harsh enough to awaken Soobin.

The nurse that came inside was one Yeonjun recognized from his first visit at the doctor a few days ago. He looked at them with an amused smile on his face as he watched Soobin bashfully trying to get out from under the covers and ending up nearly falling out of the bed in his haste to get to his feet.

“Choi Yeonjun,” the nurse said, looking down at the clip board in his hands for a moment before gazing back up at him. “My apologizes for waking you, but you have been scheduled for another X-ray in fifteen minutes.”

Yeonjun pushed himself to a sitting position. “Do I need to go there now?”

The nurse nodded. “I suggest you do so, the walk is at least five minutes.”

Following the nurse’s words, Yeonjun quickly got out of bed. The nurse helped him remove the drip connected to him, as the bag seemed to have run out during the night, and then Yeonjun followed him out of the room. He looked over his shoulder to make sure Soobin was coming too; he almost grabbed Soobin’s hand because he missed his touch, before he remembered where they were and thought better of it.

The X-ray was done quickly, and then they were told to sit in a waiting room for the nurse to come back.

“How are you feeling?”

To Yeonjun’s surprise, Soobin was the one to grab his hand when they were seated in the waiting room. He played with Yeonjun’s fingers as he listened to his answer, and Yeonjun recognized it as a nervous stim of his.

“I feel fine, actually,” Yeonjun replied. He wondered if the painkillers were still in his system. It wasn’t unlikely, although his mind felt clearer now than it had done last night, so probably they were on their way out.

“And you’re not just saying that to calm me?” Soobin wondered, narrowing his eyes.

“No, really.” Yeonjun chuckled at Soobin’s disbelief. “I’m not in pain at all, and I feel refreshed. Maybe Doctor Lee was right, and the worst is over.”

Soobin looked hopeful for that to be true and squeezed Yeonjun’s hand in response.

They sat in that room for another fifteen minutes before the same nurse came to find them. He was once again smiling in amusement when he noticed their interlocked hands before he schooled his face and looked away.

“Mr Choi,” the nurse said as he came to a stop in front of them. The two boys stood up to not come across as rude and that led to the nurse having to look up at them. “The analysis of your X-ray will take a day or two, and the same goes for the blood tests from yesterday. However, the doctor in charge has given me a preliminary assessment to give to you.”

Yeonjun glanced at Soobin, then both of them nodded at the nurse.

“When comparing the results from your previous visit last week with what Doctor Lee saw yesterday and there seems to be a stark difference. I believe Dr Lee explained the theory of your body changing to accommodate your new biology, is that correct?”

The nurse was speaking in more formal terms than Yeonjun was used to, so it took him a second to register the question. “Um, yes, she said it was some kind of metamorphosis and that my organs were, like, shifting around.”

The nurse nodded. “Exactly. Most likely, this is what caused you the massive amount of pain you’ve been experiencing. But it seems like your body is finally done changing.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm. There is only small differences between today’s images and yesterday’s. Even if the results are preliminary, the doctor’s first assessment was that your biology is now indistinguishable to that of a natural born omega. You’re not in pain any longer, correct?”

“Oh. Um, yes. I feel fine now.”

“Good. I would assume that means the worst is over.” The nurse took a step away from them, looking down at his papers as he continued. “You may return home now, and your test results will be sent to you when they are ready. And if anything changes, just come back and we will see what we can do.”

And just like that, Yeonjun was released from the hospital and sent home. It felt almost surreal when just a few minutes later, they walked out of the building. Soobin had been in such a rush to get Yeonjun to the hospital that they hadn’t brought any winter clothes, so they were feeling the sting of the cold winter air immediately.

As Soobin called for a cab, Yeonjun took out his phone to answer all the worried messages from his friends. He knew he had worried them yesterday—Taehyun especially—so reassuring them that he was fine now was the least he could do.

Not much later, the taxi dropped them off at home. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, Soobin had to head to class shortly thereafter. However, Yeonjun had started feeling fed up with seeing Soobin leave without him, so he decided to tag along and hang around at school while Soobin was at his lectures.

Kai was the first to find him sitting at a table in the library on his own, and he immediately pestered him with questions about the hospital visit. He once again tried reassuring his friend that he was totally fine, however it was a bit hard to do when he had to mention the whole thing about his insides moving around. Kai’s eyes had been big as saucers, and Yeonjun couldn’t really blame him.

A while later, Taehyun and Beomgyu arrived together, both looking like they had seen better days. Taehyun almost fell into his seat and laid his head down on the table in front of him, groaning.

“What’s up with you two?” Yeonjun asked, sharing a look with Kai that said, ‘why are these two always arriving together lately?’.

“We went to sleep pretty late and had to wake up really early,” Beomgyu said as nonchalantly as possible, and Yeonjun could tell he was trying to avoid questions. Which meant Yeonjun just had to question him. Call him a troublemaker, he didn’t care.

“You had a sleepover or something?” Suddenly, he recalled Taehyun saying he had been somewhere on the opposite side of the city, seemingly helping Beomgyu with something, when he called yesterday. Had the two of them spent the entire day together?

He wished he could stare Taehyun down and make him explain what was going on, but unfortunately the young alpha had fallen asleep on the table.

“Yeah, so what?” Beomgyu said, narrowing his eyes at Yeonjun. “Anyways, are you free of any chronical illnesses? Did they find what was wrong with you?”

Yeonjun kind of wanted to ignore his questions and keep pestering him, but Kai nudged him in the arm, as if to prevent him from being difficult.  

Letting out a sigh, he glanced at Kai. He knew the others probably wanted him to try and get along with Beomgyu, but old habits die hard.

“They just said it was my body completely turning into an omega.”

“Huh?” Taehyun lifted his head, staring wide-eyed at him. He must’ve only rested his eyes, as it was clear he had had no trouble hearing what they had been saying. Still, he looked like he could barely keep his eyes open, and if Yeonjun had been any closer he would have ruffled his hair and pinched his cheek. “What does that mean?”

“It means…” Yeonjun said, cringing even before he said it because he couldn’t believe he was saying it out loud. “I think it means I’ve grown a womb.”

It was quiet. They all stared at him, Kai with the biggest eyes of them all.

“Uh, so yeah. That’s why I was in pain. My body was… changing.”

“That’s freaky,” Kai said in a thoughtful voice. His eyes lit up with question, then, and he glanced between Beomgyu and Yeonjun as he asked it. “Does… does that mean you can get pregnant now, Hyung?”

Yeonjun would lie if he said he hadn’t thought about it, so it wasn’t weird of Kai to ask. He much preferred not to think too much about it, because just the mere thought of suddenly being able to grow a baby made him nauseous.

“I don’t think he can,” Beomgyu said, pursing his lips. Yeonjun met his eyes, and Beomgyu looked like he was taking pity on him. It was a weird sight to see. “Sure, if you have a womb, you technically can get pregnant, but without eggs it will never happen, and I don’t really think you’d magically grow those out of nothing. But that’s just my guess.” He ended with a nonchalant shrug.

“Technically, he shouldn’t be able to grow a womb out of nothing, either,” Taehyun commented.

Both of their arguments were valid, unfortunately. Yeonjun had no idea which was the truth, and there was no way for him to know, either. Maybe he should give his doctor a call later in the week, because this little detail was probably something he should be aware of.

Not that he was currently in any risk of getting pregnant, but if this was how he was going to have to live the rest of his life, he ought to know if the risk even existed.

“What are you guys talking about?” Soobin asked as he came walking between the bookshelves to get to them. Yeonjun jumped at the sight of him, not having realized enough time had passed for Soobin’s lecture to already have finished.

As Soobin remained standing—he must have expected them all to get up so they could head to the cafeteria—it was Kai who answered. “We’re discussing whether Yeonjun-hyung can get pregnant or not.”

Well. There goes being subtle about it, I guess, Yeonjun thought.

“Oh.” Soobin’s eyebrows shot up as he looked at Yeonjun. He seemed to think for a moment, before tilting his head to the side, a determined look appearing on his face. “Well, I’d say the answer doesn’t matter much.” Yeonjun frowned as he grabbed his jacket and moved to stand.

“Why?”

“Because even if you could, you’re not going to get pregnant if you don’t want it.” He smiled, showing off his dimples, and moved to walk out of there when all of them were standing. “I’ll make sure of it, Hyung. No one will ever force that on you.”

Oh.

If hearts could burst from feeling too much love, Yeonjun’s would have done so right now.

Yeonjun didn’t listen to what else was being said after that, as all he could think of was how hard his heart was beating and how lucky he was that he was wearing scent blockers, or they would all have smelled his burst of feelings right now.

Conversation seemed to shift over to something less serious as they headed down to the cafeteria. Yeonjun found himself suddenly walking in between Taehyun and Kai, with the other two talking animatedly about something as they walked in the front.

“Hyung,” Taehyun whispered, tapping him on the arm to gain his attention. Yeonjun turned to look at him questioningly, at which Taehyun pointed at his own eyes and tried to convey his point without saying anything else.

It took 2 seconds for the penny to drop, and when it did, Yeonjun’s eyes widened for a split second before he turned his gaze to the ground.

Fuck, his eyes were blue again? Why?

Judging by the way Taehyun and Kai were giggling and teasingly pushing their fingers into him, the reason for it was the man walking unknowingly a few steps ahead of him.

Well, if Yeonjun didn’t know he was fucked already, this was a perfect reminder of just how near impossible it had become for him to hide his feelings for Soobin.

Thank God that Soobin was as dense as they come when it comes to romance.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

On Friday, Yeonjun found himself stressfully walking around his entire apartment while on call with his mother. It was the first phone call he’d had with her since they saw each other in person, and so far she had only managed to stress him out by talking about herself the whole time.

“Okay. Yeah, yeah, I get it. I’ll talk to you later.” Yeonjun came to a halt when the call ended abruptly. He let out a loud sigh and threw himself face down on the couch.

Soobin looked up at him from his computer from where he was sitting by the kitchen table. “Busy?”

Groaning, Yeonjun lifted himself up onto his elbows to look at Soobin. “It seems so. Apparently she doesn’t have time for her only son for more than a ten minute call. She didn’t seem to care much about me going to the hospital two days ago…” he sighed and dropped back down onto the couch, turning to lay on his back so he could stare up at the ceiling. “Is it wrong of me to be disappointed she didn’t ask? I mean, I talked to dad about it yesterday, and he was worried. He must have told her about it, right?”

“Yeah,” Soobin agreed, giving him a sad smile. “It’s understandable that you want your mom to care about your wellbeing, especially after what you’ve been through.”

“I guess. Anyways,” Yeonjun shut any further conversation down, trying to push his upset feelings out of his head, or he would never let it go, “when are we heading to Beomgyu’s?”

The younger omega had invited the friend group over to his place to have some fun. Yeonjun had been reluctant to go at first, as he was apparently the only one of them that hadn’t been to Beomgyu’s place but now after that disastrous phone call with his mom, he was more than eager to get out of the apartment.

He also still hadn’t heard back about his results from the hospital, and he hadn’t been able to shake the uncomfortable feeling that not knowing whether he could get pregnant or not gave him. He desperately needed a distraction, right about now.

“Tae said he’d come and get us at 6,” Soobin replied, thankfully not commenting on the not so swift change of topic.

Yeonjun checked the time. It was over an hour left. As much as Yeonjun wanted to spend that time talking to Soobin to distract himself, he knew Soobin had to catch up with his schoolwork, so he decided that he would spend the hour slowly getting ready to leave.

“I’ll take a shower,” he told the younger, who smiled before going back to focus on whatever it was he was reading.

Yeonjun refrained from turning on the light in the bathroom, and stepped into the shower under complete darkness. It felt better that way, knowing he wasn’t risking seeing himself in the mirror. He hadn’t been able to look at himself since that time when he’d called Beomgyu in the middle of the night. Now knowing that his body had gone through more metamorphosis—as Doctor Lee called it—since then, he felt even more scared to look.

The water heated up slowly, until it turned to scalding hot, but Yeonjun barely noticed. He let the water run down his head and over his ear, muffling the outside world for a few short minutes.

Taking showers had become an anxiety inducing experience. He didn’t want to look, nor touch his body, but he also didn’t want to reek or smell bad enough for Soobin to react again. At the same time, it was a place where he could dissociate for a short time, where he could silence the thoughts in his head and stand there, focusing on the sensation of hot water on his skin.

This time, he could only stand it for a minute or two before it became too much. He quickly stepped out of the spray of water and forced himself to rub body wash over himself and wash it off after.  

Just calm down, he told himself and his rapidly beating heart. Leaning his head against the tiles after stopping the water, his breaths were ragged as he did his best to calm down.

He felt weak to admit that taking showers were hard for him. It was such a simple thing, but it took a lot out of him. He always felt mentally exhausted afterwards, and he didn’t even fully understand why showering out of all things was so anxiety inducing.

Having learnt from previous occurrences, Yeonjun focused on what he could hear. He had learnt that there were many small sounds around him that he wouldn’t have been able to pick up as a human, and trying to hear them had become kind of like a game to calm himself down.

At first, all he heard was the sound of water dropping down his wet body and onto the bathroom floor. There was also the slow whooshing sound of the wind outside the window. But then, as his focus sharpened, he picked up the sound of deep and calm breaths. There was a pencil running over a paper, and occasionally a rubbing sound indicating the words being erased.

Listening to Soobin always helped calm Yeonjun down. Just knowing that he was there, right outside this room, and that he wasn’t as alone as he sometimes felt, was the best cure for his anxieties.

When he was about to exit the bathroom, he could hear Soobin humming something under his breath, a song they had heard in a video Yeonjun had showed him earlier that day. It was very endearing.

Yeonjun looked over at him before he carefully stepped out, a towel wrapped around his lower body. The alpha was hunched over his book, too focused on his studies to realize Yeonjun was already finished. Yeonjun let out a sigh of relief, and trudged over to his wardrobe more confidently.

He was still a bit too self-conscious about his changed body to flaunt it, even in front of Soobin.

Before he reached the wardrobe, however, Soobin’s humming abruptly stopped. Despite himself, Yeonjun turned around in surprise.

He was surprised—shocked, even—to see Soobin’s eyes blown wide, his gaze locked on his abdomen.

The two of them were frozen for several seconds. Inside his mind, Yeonjun was screaming, but it wasn’t until Soobin’s eyes started moving upwards that he managed to physically react.

After making a very embarrassing sound (a very high-pitched mix between a gasp and a scream), Yeonjun rushed to the wardrobe and pulled the first thing he saw over his head. Once his naked body was covered, he crouched and hid his face in his hands, feeling how all his blood was rushing to his face.

“Hyung!” Soobin cried out behind him. The sound of a chair scraping against the floor and rapid footsteps followed, until Yeonjun was sure Soobin was just behind him.

“Hyung, what’s wrong?” Soobin asked, his voice worried and unsure. “I didn’t mean to stare at you, I was just—”

“I look really weird, don’t I?” Yeonjun choked out between his fingers, interrupting Soobin. “Just say it. It’s what you were thinking, right?”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“You know!” He wanted to stare at Soobin and make him admit it, but he was too shaken to remove his hands from his face. It was like all his insecurities hit him right in the chest, making it hard to breathe suddenly. “My- my hips, and my arms, and—even my butt, they’re all different. Ugly.”

“Hyung.”

Yeonjun’s breathing grew more irrational with every passing second.

“Hyung, look at me.”

There was a stark difference in Soobin’s tone, a seriousness to it that Yeonjun seldom heard. It surprised him enough that he suddenly stopped heaving for breaths and lowered his hands. Without thinking, he lifted his head and looked up.

Despite the hardness in his voice, Soobin’s face was nothing but gentle. The way he was looking at Yeonjun made him want to squirm and look away for a whole different reason than earlier. He fought that instinct down, though, wanting to hold Soobin’s intense gaze.

“Hyung, you’re everything but ugly,” Soobin said firmly, crouching down to his level now. “I know I don’t say it often, it’s always you that give me the compliments, but… I think you’re beautiful. The most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. And that hasn’t changed since you became an omega. I’m sorry if the way I looked at you just now made you feel so insecure.”

It was true, Soobin had never told Yeonjun in so clear terms that he thought he was beautiful. He’d compliment Yeonjun if strictly necessary, such as when he’d put lots of effort into a makeup look or an outfit that he was unsure of. But he had never truly complimented Yeonjun’s looks, his features, before.

Maybe before he hadn’t needed to, because Yeonjun had always been comfortable in his own skin. But now… now was a whole different story, and hearing those words from Soobin made all the difference in the world.

He didn’t even have the mindset to get flustered by the compliments; he was just lapping them up like he had never heard anyone say anything good about him before.

“Come here.” Soobin held out his arms for Yeonjun to lean into his embrace. The movement kicked Yeonjun’s brain back into action, and he quickly hid his face in Soobin’s neck, wrapping his arms around him.

One of Soobin’s arms snaked around his waist carefully, while the other gently cradled the back of Yeonjun’s neck. He made out a satisfied sound, before saying, “Do you want me to tell you again, Hyung?”

Normally, Yeonjun would have rolled his eyes and told him he was being too over the top. In that moment, though, he was too vulnerable, so all he could do was nod against Soobin’s warm neck.

“You’re the most beautiful person in every room, you know that right? Nothing can change that.”

Yeonjun had never been so flustered as he felt when sitting on that floor, in Soobin’s arms and listening to him continue showering him with compliments. It was like he’d opened a chasm of compliments in Soobin, sending every compliment one could think of pouring out of him. It almost overwhelmed Yeonjun how it seemed never ending.

Still, he loved it of course. Not just because it made him feel good about himself, but because they were coming from Soobin.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

An hour or so later, they stood outside the door to Beomgyu’s place. Because of their slight delay (that being, Yeonjun’s tiny breakdown) Soobin had alerted Taehyun that they would need more time before being picked up, so the alpha had waited patiently for them in the car outside. Yeonjun was extremely grateful for him and Soobin, for letting him take the time he needed.

Just as Soobin knocked on the door, Beomgyu swung it open and gave them a stare down. “You’re late.”

Yeonjun glanced at Soobin, momentarily worried that Soobin would tell Beomgyu the cause behind their tardiness. Before neither of them had time to say anything, though, Beomgyu let out a snort and pulled them both inside, Taehyun coming in last and closing the door behind.

“Good for you that I’m such a forgiving host,” Beomgyu teased as he waited for them to take off their shoes. Once they were ready, he led them through the hallway until they reached a high-ceilinged room where they found Kai already seated on the couch, full focus on a video game he was playing on the tv.

Yeonjun was, quite frankly, in awe. It was almost like a fever dream, walking around this huge, gorgeous house. To think that someone younger than him—who was still in university—was able to live at a place like this, was insane.

“This place could house an entire family,” Yeonjun mumbled under his breath, eyes scanning over the paintings hanging on the walls, the cabinet displaying expensive looking glassware and porcelain, as well as the huge flat screen he was being led to sit in front of.

“This place is really nice, isn’t it?” Kai said after greeting them, looking sideways at Yeonjun before his eyes travelled back to the screen.

Yeonjun couldn’t stop himself from nodding in agreement. To his surprise, Beomgyu didn’t answer cockily, instead all he did was shrug and went to sit next to Taehyun.

For a while, they watched the maknaes play their game, conversing casually about nothing in particular. When they finished, Beomgyu pulled out three more controllers and switched to a game they could all play together.

After his little stumble earlier, Yeonjun hadn’t expected to be in the mood for games and joking around. But as soon as they started playing (and all of them started trying to either cheat or sabotage each other) he felt surprisingly light hearted.

After a couple of rounds, which ended with Soobin outclassing them all and Beomgyu getting mad that none of them were letting him to win, someone (Yeonjun was sure it had been Kai) had pulled out a few beers and soju bottles, and then the tv was turned off.

They spread out around the sofa table, and Soobin was first to throw out a suggestion.

“Let’s play truth or dare.”

Yeonjun, who had been watching Kai pouring everyone a shot of soju, looked up at him in surprise.

“Really? But you hate truth or dare.”

Yeonjun could remember a number of instances when Soobin had whined to him about how much he hated being forced to play this game, so it was quite a shock to hear Soobin say that out loud.

“No I don’t.”

“Soobin, you literally whine every time I used to suggest—”

A subtle kick to his shin under the table shut him up. “Yeah but I want to play it now,” Soobin interrupted, giving Yeonjun a frowny face that said he needed Yeonjun to shut up.

Oh? he thought, intrigued. What was Soobin up to?

“Ah, okay,” Yeonjun said, nodding. He looked at the others and said, “sounds good, right?”

The others agreed easily, and so they were playing truth or dare.

It took a few rounds of innocent questions and no one being bold enough to choose ‘dare’, before Yeonjun got an idea of why Soobin had been so adamant to play this game.

The empty soju bottle they had placed on the table landed on Beomgyu. Soobin had been the one to spin, and he instantly lit up with a mischievous grin.

“Truth or dare,” he asked, his eyes locked on Beomgyu. The omega’s gaze was just as intense at he looked back at Soobin. Briefly, Yeonjun wondered what was going on inside Beomgyu’s head, as he was likely contemplating what would be his safest option.

He soon landed on an answer. “Dare.”

Yeonjun was still quite confused when Soobin smirked. “I dare you to flirt with Taehyun-ah until the next time the bottle lands on you,” he said. It caused Beomgyu’s eyes to widen, and he glanced at Taehyun with uncertainty in his eyes suddenly.

“I—”

“Why me?” Taehyun wondered, not sounding at all bothered to get roped into a dare.

“Because you’re sitting next to him,” Soobin answered, simply. He wiggled his eyebrows at Beomgyu. “So? Are you gonna do it?”

“I’m… Are you okay with it?” Beomgyu was looking at Taehyun, and Yeonjun could swear there was worry in his eyes.

This behaviour from Beomgyu was very unexpected. Yeonjun had seen him flirt with Soobin like crazy, but when he was asked to do it for five minutes with Taehyun, he didn’t dare?

“It’s fine,” Taehyun answered, shrugging. “It’s not for long, anyways.”

“Ah, yes,” Beomgyu said, scratching at the back of his head. He turned his head so Taehyun couldn’t see his expression and sent an angry glare towards Soobin. Then, he sighed and smoothed out his expression. “I’ll do it.”

They waited for Beomgyu to start before spinning the bottle once again. With another sigh, Beomgyu seemed to put on his acting face as he then turned to Taehyun. He scooted closer to him, close enough to touch, even if he opted not to do so.

“Taehyun-ah,” Beomgyu said in a voice slightly lower than his normal one, “you look so good in this lighting, I can’t seem to take my eyes off of you.”

Taehyun just gave him the same stare as he usually would, not showing any reaction.

Beomgyu maintained the eye contact, biting his lip as he continued. “I wanted to ask you; what do you think about my look today? I dressed up just for you.”

As Taehyun’s eyes ran down Beomgyu’s body, as if it was the first time he took in Beomgyu’s outfit, Yeonjun noticed Soobin was still smirking next to him. He found it odd but played it off as Soobin and Beomgyu being close enough friends now for Soobin to enjoy embarrassing him.

“You look good, Hyung,” Taehyun answered, his tone neutral.

“Only good? Taehyun-ah, I wanted you to notice me.”

Yeonjun swore Taehyun was getting flustered, with the way he took more than a second to answer. Normally, he was very good at hiding his thoughts and emotions from his face when he wanted to. Maybe it was because he was tipsy, or maybe he was starting to get affected by the way that Beomgyu was batting his eyelashes at him.

“You look great, okay hyung?” Taehyun said with finality. He then looked at the others in the ring, before glancing down at the bottle in the middle of their ring. “Please spin the bottle now.”

Yeonjun shared looks with Kai and Soobin, and they all had to hold back a laugh. It wasn’t often they got to see Taehyun flustered.

After Beomgyu spun the bottle, the game continued without much drama. When it landed on Kai, and he chose dare, he had to film himself dancing and send it in his family chat.

The round kept going, and Beomgyu kept up the flirting, mostly because Soobin was keeping his eyes on him and pointing out whenever he was quiet for too long. Taehyun seemed to get used to it quickly and was acting completely unaffected as Beomgyu shot off compliments and pickup lines.

As the spins continued and kept not landing on Beomgyu, even Yeonjun was starting to feel bad for the guy. He was starting to look a bit squeamish, to say the least.

Eventually, the bottle did land on Beomgyu again, and at that point even Soobin seemed to take pity on him. He leaned forward across the table and patted his head as if praising him for his hard work and told him to stop the flirting, at which Beomgyu very visibly relaxed.

Just in that moment, Taehyun’s phone rang. “It’s my mom,” he said, standing up. “I’ll answer in case it’s something important, but you can keep going without me.”

He walked out into the corridor and chose a door to enter, closing it behind him. Yeonjun briefly wondered how many times Taehyun had been here if he was comfortable enough to just enter any of Beomgyu’s rooms without hesitation.

Yeonjun nearly jumped in his seat when Beomgyu, as soon as Taehyun closed the door, jumped out of his seat and threw himself on top of Soobin.

“You devil!” he whisper-yelled as he managed to push Soobin, who was sitting on the floor next to Yeonjun, onto his back. As Soobin was fighting back, it turned into an almost wrestle match on the floor. “How could you do that to me?”

“Don’t say you didn’t enjoy it,” Soobin said, and suddenly he started giggling as Beomgyu changed tactic and tickled him.

“You’re the worst!” Beomgyu cried out as he did his best to keep Soobin restrained on the ground. But Soobin was not exactly weak, so the wrestling caused them to nearly hit Yeonjun.

At that point, Yeonjun and Kai shared a look, agreeing that it was time to stop them. They pulled Beomgyu off Soobin, which took some effort, and put him back in his seat on the couch.

“Okay, let’s just calm down, please,” Yeonjun said, going back to Soobin’s side and helping him up to a sitting position.

Beomgyu glared at Soobin for three more seconds before he suddenly deflated. He put his face in his hands and whined loudly. “Oh my gosh. I can’t believe you made me do that.”

As Soobin sat back up, Kai asked what was going on. Yeonjun also wanted to know.

“I’m going to die of embarrassment,” Beomgyu continued, not bothering to answer the question. “He didn’t even react—why didn’t he react?” He suddenly removed his hands, and there was a horrified look on his face. “Oh my gosh, he thinks I’m repulsive- Soobin what am I supposed to do—”

Soobin grabbed Beomgyu’s wrist, interrupting his rant. “He doesn’t think you’re repulsive, you’re overreacting.”

“Once again,” Yeonjun spoke up, slightly annoyed now that the two didn’t seem to care that he and Kai was still in the room, “what the hell are you on about?”

“Oh,” Soobin said, as if it was simple. “Beomgyu’s freaking out because Tae didn’t react to him flirting with him.”

“Well, yeah, I gathered that much, but why—”

“I like Taehyun, okay?” Beomgyu blurted out. His eyes widened as he seemed to realize he had raised his voice, and he glanced down the corridor in horror. Taehyun didn’t seem to have heard anything, because no sound came from the door he had disappeared behind.

“Wh-what?” Yeonjun stared right at Beomgyu, completely dumbfounded. He looked to Kai and was thankful to see that he seemed as surprised by the revelation as he was. Soobin, however…

“But- but you like Soobin!” Yeonjun said, pointing at the alpha accusingly.

Beomgyu glanced at Soobin, and the two seemed to come to some sort of nonverbal agreement before Beomgyu answered. “No… I don’t, actually. I never did. It’s always been Taehyun.”

Once again, Yeonjun felt like he was being thrown for a loop. He frowned deeply, eyes wandering between Soobin and Beomgyu as he tried to make sense of Beomgyu’s words. “But, what- then, why… why would you—”

“Why would I flirt so much with Soobin before?” Beomgyu filled in.

“Yeah.”

Soobin and Beomgyu shared a look, and then both turned their gazes on Yeonjun. There was a noticeable guilty look on Soobin’s face.

“Okay, so the truth is,” Soobin explained, “Beomgyu and I made a pact that would help him get closer to Taehyun without coming off as a creep.” When Yeonjun and Kai didn’t say anything, he continued. “He pretended to flirt with me so Tae wouldn’t be put off by him immediately.”

For a moment, Yeonjun’s brain stopped functioning. “He… he just pretended to flirt with you?” Yeonjun simultaneously felt like he’d been stabbed in the chest and doused with ice cold water as he took that in.

“Yeah, that’s why I was so over the top,” Beomgyu added. He looked deflated, as if all the energy he normally carried inside him had suddenly been sucked out.

Yeonjun opened his mouth to let out all the questions spinning around in his head, when the sound of the door opening startled them all, followed by footsteps coming their way. The four of them stared at each other with wide eyes, and they all seemed to understand that this conversation was over. For now.

After Taehyun came back, it took some time for the tension in the room to dissipate. Thankfully, Taehyun didn’t seem to suspect anything, and they quickly resumed their night by moving on from the games to watching a movie.

Yeonjun kept glancing at Beomgyu the entire time. Suddenly, he was seeing the omega in a completely different light, and he didn’t know how to feel about it. As he was watching him quite intently, he could tell Beomgyu was still a bit upset, but he had to give it to him that he was a pretty good actor.

He didn’t fully understand why Beomgyu was upset, though. Neither did he understand why they’d kept up that ‘pact’ thing that Soobin mentioned, without telling him or Kai.

Part of him wanted to pull Beomgyu aside and ask him to explain himself, because suddenly nothing made sense in his mind. His relationship with Beomgyu was probably not good enough for that yet, so he guessed he would have to ask Soobin about it instead.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

It wasn’t until they arrived back in Yeonjun’s apartment several hours later, tipsy and exhausted, that Yeonjun had time to think about what had been revealed earlier.

When they stood next to each other, brushing their teeth in silence, Yeonjun’s thoughts were running wild. First of all… Beomgyu never liked Soobin? That was hard to wrap his head around, solely because he had based his entire opinion of Beomgyu as a person around the fact that he liked Soobin. It was basically the main reason for why he had never been able to stand Beomgyu, and now it turned out it wasn’t even real. Had he hated Beomgyu for nothing? Had he treated Beomgyu like shit for nothing?

Second of all… Beomgyu liked Taehyun. He had liked Taehyun for a long time, apparently.

The more he thought about it, he realized it did kind of make sense. Now knowing the truth, he could see how Beomgyu’s flirting with Soobin had been over the top and not very sincere. When Beomgyu was around Taehyun, he acted much differently, in a more genuine way. 

“Hyung?”

Yeonjun jerked back to reality and realized he had been staring out into space for a while, standing in the doorway after having finished in the bathroom. He noticed that Soobin was already in bed, having lifted the covers as he waited for Yeonjun to join him.

Quickly, he jumped into bed and laid his head down on the pillow. He wasn’t even going to try to fall asleep yet, as there were too many things to think about, so he just stared up at the darkness above them.

After maybe ten minutes of trying to wrap his head around it, he realized that he wouldn’t be able to sleep without talking to Soobin about it. Fortunately, he could also tell that Soobin hadn’t fallen asleep yet; he briefly wondered if he was awake for the same reason.

“Soobin?” he whispered, trying not to startle him in the silence around them.

“Hmm?”

Yeonjun felt rather than saw Soobin turning onto his side. He copied the movement so that they were lying facing each other.

“Did you and Beomgyu really come up with a plan that involved tricking all of us that he was into you?”

Soobin let out a short breath through his nose. “When you say it like that, it sounds kinda shitty, doesn’t it?”

“That wasn’t what I meant,” Yeonjun hurried to say, because he wasn’t trying to make Soobin feel bad. “I’m just trying to make sense of it. Why did you come up with a plan like that at all? And when did you come up with it?”

Soobin sighed and turned to lay on his back. It was quiet for a few seconds, and Yeonjun guessed that Soobin was trying to formulate his thoughts into words.

“You know that party you took us to a while ago, the queer night?” He waited for Yeonjun to nod to show he was following before continuing. “I went outside for a short while, and that’s when I met Beomgyu. He kind of approached me because he knew I was friends with Tae, and he admitted that he really liked Tae but didn’t know how to approach him. He said something about, um, overhearing Taehyun saying he hates being flirted with or something like that? Then, I don’t know, he kinda come up with this plan and then we met up the day after and talked about it, and that’s pretty much it.”

Yeonjun again thought about that mysterious message from BG, who he now knew was Beomgyu. It all made a whole lot of sense, now that he knew the whole story.

“Figures that it was Beomgyu’s plan.”

Soobin shrugged. “Don’t put the whole blame on him. I agreed to it, didn’t I?” He sighed heavily, avoiding Yeonjun’s eyes to instead look at the way his hair was splayed out on his pillow. “It was a stupid, manipulative plan, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know,” Yeonjun said truthfully. “Maybe it helped Tae getting more comfortable around him. I wished you’d have told me, though, then we could have avoided me hating him so much.”

Soobin’s eyes zoned in on Yeonjun’s, and he tilted his head a little in confusion. “Yeah? Why did you even dislike him, Hyung?”

Oh. He’d dug himself into that one, hadn’t he.

He racked his brain, trying to come up with a reply that didn’t completely give him away, because no way would this be how he ended up confessing to Soobin. “Ah, he was just… annoying, you know? Like, we didn’t even know him, but suddenly he was there all the time, acting like he was your new bestie and clinging to you all the time.”

“Maybe you were jealous because he was taking up so much of my time,” Soobin teased, raising an eyebrow suggestively at him.

You don’t know how right you are, Yeonjun thought as he tried to act unaffected, rolling his eyes. “Anyways, so Beomgyu likes Tae?”

“Yeah,” Soobin breathed out. “He’s so annoying about it, you don’t even know. He’s always like ‘Taehyun’s so hot’, ‘Taehyun’s the perfect alpha’, blah blah blah. You don’t even wanna know what he texted me about Tae when he was on his heat.”

Yeonjun laughed at Soobin’s annoyed yet fond tone. “Wow, he’s really smitten.”

“Yeah, it’s the worst. But it’s also kind of cute, don’t you think?”

“I don’t know what I think. I will have to rethink my entire image of Beomgyu now.”

Yeonjun’s comment made them both laugh, until a thought hit Yeonjun, and he sobered right back up. “Wait. Do you think Tae likes him back?”

“Honestly, I can’t tell,” Soobin said thoughtfully. “Beomgyu is convinced that he doesn’t, and even if he doesn’t show it, I can tell that he’s a bit heartbroken about it.”

“Tae has always kept his heart locked behind bars,” Yeonjun said, speaking his thoughts out loud as he thought them, “so maybe he needs some time to open it up.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

Silence wrapped around them comfortably, and Yeonjun wondered if maybe that was a good point to end the conversation. There was another thing, though, that bothered him, and he knew that if he didn’t ask about it he wouldn’t be getting any sleep tonight.  

“I don’t get it though. If the plan was to hide Beomgyu’s true intentions from Tae, to make him comfortable around Beomgyu as friends first, then… why didn’t you tell me and Kai anything?”

For a brief second, Yeonjun saw fear flash on Soobin’s face

“Oh, um…” Soobin fell quiet, and Yeonjun could tell he was thinking hard. But… why? Why did he need to think hard about that? He got the feeling Soobin was trying to come up with an excuse, which didn’t really make sense, because why would he need to? What could there be that he needed to hide?

“I mean,” Soobin ended up saying, and Yeonjun found it very suspicious that he once again didn’t look him in the eyes, “Beomgyu thought it would be smartest that way. He just didn’t want to risk Tae finding out.”

Yeonjun could see in his eyes that Soobin wasn’t being completely honest with him. It ticked him off, to know that his best friend was lying to him. Sometimes when it happened, he would pester Soobin about it until he told the truth, but for some reason, right now all his energy was sucked out of him.

Besides, this was something that Soobin had kept a secret from him for months, both before and after he was kidnapped. Most likely, he wouldn’t lose his composure and spill his secrets to Yeonjun just like that.

Yeonjun didn’t want to force it out of him. He always wanted Soobin to be honest with him, without having to ask for it. Knowing that that wasn’t the case right now made Yeonjun feel a sudden emptiness that had him turning onto his back and mumbling a quiet ‘goodnight’ before closing his eyes.

He didn’t get much sleep that night.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

The Queer night

✧.*

Soobin was not a sore loser.

He was not.

But when the winner in question cackled before letting out the loudest cheer in history, making sure everyone on their floor heard, Soobin felt a bit petty.

“I don’t want to play anymore,” he said, putting his paddle down and stepping away from the table. “Let’s just go find the others.”

Kai laughed once more. “Hey, Hyung, it’s okay. Not everyone can be a master at air hockey.”

“Shut up,” Soobin grumbled, starting to walk away. Kai fell into step with him easily. “You’re just a cheater.”

“You tell yourself that if it makes you feel better,” Kai said with a pat to Soobin’s shoulder.

They made their way down the stairs, where they stopped and tried to locate their friends.

“I think that’s them over there,” Kai said after a minute, pointing it out to Soobin. Yeonjun’s tall figure was easy to spot in the crowd, especially for Soobin.

Soobin’s sour mood from losing started to dissipate as he thought about Yeonjun’s dancing; he had a bit of a soft spot for the way Yeonjun looked whenever he got lost in the music. That was when Yeonjun looked the most at peace.

The atmosphere in the room was already bordering on suffocating, but the moment they stepped into the crowd it grew exponentially worse. It was very likely that all werewolves in this place had let go of their control over their scents, not to mention pheromones. That was one of the downsides of alcohol and going out to places where people drank. Soobin felt like he could touch the stench in the air. It was so thick he could barely breathe without choking on it.

Soobin focused on Yeonjun, trying to push any other sensation out. He just needed to reach Yeonjun, and then they could leave this place. Unless Yeonjun wanted to stay and dance. Then Soobin would do so. For Yeonjun, he could endure it.

It was like a beacon of light shone down on Yeonjun, making him stand out to Soobin in the crowd. The way Yeonjun was dancing was, as always, confident and sensual. He always danced both as if nobody was watching and everybody was watching, feeling himself and giving off a show at the same time. Soobin was absolutely enchanted, unable to pull his gaze off him.

That was, until someone else came inside Yeonjun’s bubble, and Yeonjun gladly accepted the invitation to dance together.

Soobin stared at them for perhaps a bit too long. He didn’t even notice that Taehyun was right there, and that Yeonjun was stepping in between the guy and Taehyun. He felt as if someone had pinched his heart, a painful, hurt sensation starting somewhere deep in his chest.

It wasn’t even like Yeonjun was touching the other guy or allowing him to touch him. They were just dancing close to each other, albeit in a… rather sexy way.

But in Soobin’s mind, his worries about Yeonjun hooking up with someone tonight flared up. He imagined Yeonjun giving in and stepping closer before Soobin could reach him, and having to watch as Yeonjun touched a stranger.

He stopped in his tracks, Kai nearly stumbling into him from behind. Soobin retreated his eyes from Yeonjun and turned, stuttering out an excuse about needing some fresh air to Kai before quickly disappearing.

Once outside, he walked a few meters away from the entrance, wanting to find a spot for himself where no one could see or disturb him. The air outside was fresh and cold and quiet; just what he needed. Finally, some peace and quiet where he could calm down and remind himself that what Yeonjun did was not his business.

It wasn’t like this was the first time something like this had happened. Yeonjun was a very social person: he loved talking to new people, and occasionally hook up with them, if they showed him some interest first. Most of the time, Soobin could ignore that fact about his best friend, because they usually hung out in their tiny friend group. But then, sometimes they would go out to places like these, and that was when stuff like this happened.

He really shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up about Yeonjun not hooking up with anyone tonight. He had seen Yeonjun’s outfit choice, after all, not to mention the flawless makeup he’d put on himself, likely aiming to lure in all the gay guys at the bar tonight.

Ah, Soobin felt so stupid for letting himself think that maybe Yeonjun was dressing up for him tonight. Yeonjun had called him hot several times tonight, and even though Soobin knew that was just how Yeonjun was with everyone, he had let his heart swell with the compliments, only for reality to hit him smack in the face now that he was having some quiet time alone to think.

Alone time that was suddenly interrupted by a stranger entering his personal space.

A guy with black hair infused with blonde suddenly occupied his vision. For a second, Soobin felt like this guy was shoving his scent up his nose, the way all he could smell was suddenly something sweet and florally. Soobin wanted to scrunch up his nose – no, his entire face – at the thought of an omega trying to make any moves on him right now.

“Soobin, right?” the guy asked, clearly not noticing Soobin’s state of discomfort and emotional distraught.

“Uh, yeah?” was Soobin’s answer, his tone wary as he suspected some flirty response back. “Do I know you?”

“I’m Beomgyu, we share a few classes together.”
Soobin didn’t think he had ever seen this guy before. “Oh, I, uh—”

Beomgyu laughed a little at Soobin’s dumbstruck expression. “I usually don’t show up to lectures, so you’ve probably never seen me.”

While that was a perfectly reasonable explanation, it could also just as much be a lie, an excuse for Beomgyu to come and talk to him. “Okay…?”

“I saw you in there with your friends,” Beomgyu continued, as if he didn’t care about Soobin’s little contribution to the conversation. “Nice outfit by the way, love the skirt.”

Soobin kept staring at him, still not sure if this was Beomgyu flirting or not. “Uh, thanks.” He glanced down at Beomgyu’s attire; he was wearing a loose sitting green shirt and a pair of leather shorts, with high heeled boots and a black choker. It was definitely a look, but he didn’t know how to express that to Beomgyu without it sounding weird.

But Beomgyu didn’t even give him the opportunity to compliment him back. “Anyways, now that we’ve established that we know each other, kind of, please tell me if your friend is single.”

Beomgyu’s words came out so rapidly that it took Soobin a couple of seconds to register what he had said. When he did, he nearly choked on his own spit. “Ehhh, what?”

“You know, black hair, eyes that you can drown in, looks like an angel, very clearly a strong alpha, do I need to keep going?”

Soobin stared at Beomgyu again, racking his brain. His alpha friend… did he—

“Do you mean Taehyun?”

“Taehyun! That’s his name?” Beomgyu looked ecstatic to finally be getting some answers, while Soobin still couldn’t wrap his head around the things Beomgyu had just said about Tae. “So, is he?”

“Is he what?”

Beomgyu, who had previously looked quite patient, rolled his eyes at him. “Is he single? Didn’t you hear me the first time?”

“Now, wait a minute…” Soobin held his hand out in front of himself, as if to physically stop Beomgyu from continuing. “I did hear you. I just… why are you asking me and not him?”

“Ugh, you make me wanna kick you,” Beomgyu muttered, not quiet enough for Soobin not to hear it out in the silent night. This encounter was becoming weirder and weirder with every passing second. At least Soobin didn’t feel threatened by the smaller omega; he didn’t think Beomgyu could be intimidating even if he tried. “I can’t ask him tonight, okay? I overheard him and your other, tall friend talking about how he doesn’t like superficial people hitting on him.” Beomgyu pouted a little. “I don’t want him to disregard me the first thing he does. That’s why I’m asking you, okay?”

As Soobin thought about it, he figured that it did sound like something Taehyun would say. Tae had always been more reserved, and whenever they talked about stuff like relationships, he always made it sound like he wanted something real, someone who liked him for who he truly was.

He wondered what the reason why Beomgyu seemed to like Taehyun was, since it was obvious that he didn’t know him at all.

“Well,” he answered when he worried Beomgyu might actually kick him if he took too long time, “yes, he’s single.”

“Thank you. Took you long enough to answer, my dude.”

Soobin gave him an incredulous look. Beomgyu sure was an interesting character.

“So, are you gonna do anything about it?” He found himself asking, suddenly curious about what Beomgyu’s plan was.

His question made Beomgyu sigh, a heavy, resigned kind of sigh. “Not tonight, at least.”

The wind suddenly changed, making a shiver run down Soobin’s back. For a second, he regretted his choice of wearing a skirt, as the cold bit at his close to bare legs.

“Sooo,” Beomgyu said, and when Soobin looked up at him Beomgyu was sniffing the air, “what’s got you in such a sour mood, anyways?” He eyed Soobin’s scent blocking pad and snorted. “I don’t have to smell you to tell that you’re jealous.”

Soobin wanted to snap at Beomgyu and tell him it was none of his business, but then he realized that maybe this was one of his only chances to talk about what he was feeling with someone who from an outside view. Someone who didn’t know anything about him at all.

“I…” he rubs the back of his neck, looking around to make sure none of his friends had unknowingly snuck up on them. “It’s complicated.”

Beomgyu leaned against the wall of the building. “I don’t have anywhere to be.”

Rubbing his face with his hand, Soobin grunted. “It’s… I don’t know.” Was he really going to admit to this practically-stranger what he had barely admitted to himself? “It was… my best friend was, you know, dancing and…” he fell quiet as he realised he didn’t have a good explanation.

Beomgyu’s face went through a series of expressions as he shifted from confused to understanding. “That’s complicated how? Waaaait,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Let me guess. You’ve got a crush on your best friend.”

Soobin frowned and hushed him, looking around to ensure no one was close.

He didn’t deny it. He couldn’t. Because even if he couldn’t say the words ‘I’m in love with Yeonjun-Hyung’ out loud, he had known them to be true for a while now.

“So, is it the human who’s been by Taehyun’s side all night?” Beomgyu asked thoughtfully. When Soobin stayed quiet, Beomgyu took that as confirmation. “He’s pretty, I guess. Has nothing on Taehyun, of course, but I can see the appeal.”

“Ugh, this is so weird!” Soobin exclaimed, clapping his hands over his face as if it would help hide him from everything. From Beomgyu’s strangely understanding eyes, and from the feelings residing in his chest.

“Why is it weird? What’s weird, anyways? That you like him? Or that he’s not as hot as Taehyun? Because, I mean, have you seen T—"

“Please, stop talking about how hot Taehyun is, or I’m gonna throw up.” The threat of vomit finally shut Beomgyu up. Soobin removed his hands and looked up into the darkness of the night sky. “It’s weird because I think I have feelings for my best friend, and I have no idea what to do about it.”

“’Kay,” Beomgyu said warily, “that’s fair.”

He expected Beomgyu to give him suggestions on what to do, such as telling Yeonjun about his feelings, but he didn’t. Instead, he just looked at Soobin, waiting for him to work out whatever it was that he was feeling.

“He’s my best friend since diapers,” he explained slowly, wanting Beomgyu to understand the gravity of his situation. “We lived next door and spent almost all our time together the first 18 years of our lives. He’s seen me in every embarrassing situation you can think about. I have zero chance with him, and I know it.”

“Hey, I’m sure there’s some hope for you.” Beomgyu said, suddenly putting a comforting hand on Soobin’s shoulder. “Don’t throw in the towel before you’ve given it a shot.”

“I don’t have any idea how to get him to like me, though.”

“Yeah,” Beomgyu sighed. “You and me both.”

A few seconds passed, and Soobin briefly wondered if his friends had even noticed that he was missing. The thought of them noticing nothing, of Yeonjun continuing dancing with that stranger, made something cold and bitter bubble up inside of him.

Maybe he should just go home. Maybe then Yeonjun would give his own actions some consideration for once.

Beomgyu clapped, startling Soobin into focus his eyes on him. “I just got a brilliant idea. We can help each other!”

“Huh?” Soobin frowned. “How are we gonna do that?”

A thoughtful look spread on Beomgyu’s face. He hummed a bit as he seemed to think things through. Soobin waited as patiently as he could, but in the cold air he couldn’t help bouncing on his legs a bit.

“Okay, so listen,” Beomgyu said after nearly a minute. He pulled Soobin closer to him as if he was about to tell him a very important secret. “I am going to flirt with you and act like I’m trying to get closer to you because I’m interested in you, not Taehyun. This way, I can try to get closer to your friends—meaning Taehyun specifically—without having him thinking I’m just interested in him for his looks or anything like that. And then your crush – I don’t even know his name, sorry – will see that you’re getting a lot of attention from me, and it will make him all jealous and paying closer attention to you as well.”

It was a bit of a messy plan, Soobin thought, but what else could he expect from a drunk person coming up with it on the spot?

“Agree with me, it’s a great plan, isn’t it?” Beomgyu poked Soobin in the side to try and get a reaction out of him.

“I mean… I don’t know. It’s not exactly bulletproof.”

“Well, do you have any better ideas of how to pursue your man?”

Soobin cringed at Beomgyu calling Yeonjun ‘his man’. He had barely wrapped his mind around having this crush himself, but Beomgyu sure was trying to drill it into Soobin that this was a completely normal thing.

Which, he knew it was, but still.

“I… don’t,” he finally admitted, after Beomgyu had stared him down for at least ten seconds.

“Good, then it’s settled.”

The next thing he knew, Beomgyu was putting his number into Soobin’s phone and sending himself a text. He was about to ask what they were going to do next when Beomgyu shoved the phone into his face.

“Someone called Hyungie with a heart is calling you,” he said, which made Soobin’s eyes widen as he grabbed the phone immediately.

Soobin answered while looking at Beomgyu, “Hey, Hyung?” He could swear his voice sounded all wrong and awkward. He just hoped Yeonjun was in a place too loud to hear it.

“Soobinnie, where did you go? We’re outside but I can’t see you.”

Oh! Soobin looked around, taking a step back to get even closer to the wall, hoping to be able to hide in the shadows. “I… I’m still outside too. I, uh, I can go back to the entrance, are you close to it?”

“Yeah, we’re just outside. Why are you out here all alone?”

Soobin stared at Beomgyu, wondering whether to tell Yeonjun he wasn’t alone at all. Then the thought of having to explain who Beomgyu was made him decide that he’d rather have Yeonjun worrying about him for a few more seconds. “I’m sorry, I’ll come meet you now.”

After he hung up and stuffed his phone back in his pocket, he and Beomgyu shared a look.

“Well, I guess it’s time to go our separate ways,” Beomgyu said, as if it was a big deal, and not like they had just met like ten minutes ago. “I’ll text you tomorrow.”

And then Beomgyu was walking away, heading away from the club as if he was satisfied with what he’d got out of the night. Soobin stared after him until the darkness enveloped him, at which point he remembered promising to go back to his friends.

“Soobin!”

It took Yeonjun two seconds after Soobin had stepped into the light coming from the inside of the bar to notice him, and another five seconds for him to reach him. Soobin was pulled into a sideways hug. In his shock he was too slow to reciprocate before Yeonjun was stepping back to look at him instead.

“You were gone for so long,” Yeonjun whined, pouting cutely up at Soobin. In the bad lighting, it almost looked like Yeonjun was checking him out, but Soobin knew better than to let himself believe his own half-drunk judgement.

When Yeonjun’s hand comfortably landed on Soobin’s waist, squeezing gently, it took everything in Soobin to not squeal in surprise. Instead, he tried to act normal and chuckled, shaking his head. At least he didn’t have to fake the fond look on his face, because as much as he was attracted to Yeonjun always, he would also never get over how cute his best friend could be.

After Kai and Taehyun reached them, Yeonjun suggested they go home, as if he read Soobin’s awkward behaviour as discomfort. It took some convincing words from his side to make Yeonjun let go of his stubbornness.

So, they stayed for a while longer.

They moved first to the bar, where they ordered a round of shots that was downed quickly. Soobin could handle quite a lot of alcohol, being tall and—if he could say it himself—well-built, but he had to admit that he was starting to get affected.

Dangerous. It was dangerous to let himself get too drunk around Yeonjun now, for the first time since he realised his feelings. Not that he worried he might do something he would regret—he’d like to think he had better control over himself than that—but he wasn’t sure he’d be able to keep his feelings completely under wrap if his mind got too fuzzy.

He wasn’t ready for his feelings to be revealed just yet.

Thinking it’d be safer for him, the moment they moved from the bar over to a table of their own, Soobin sat in the seat next to Kai, leaving the one next to Yeonjun obviously vacant. He had only been sitting for perhaps five seconds, however, before Yeonjun started whining.

“Sooooobin, sit with me.”

Ignoring Yeonjun when he sounded like that was out of the question. Not even sober Soobin would have been able to resist that.

Soobin bit his lip and glanced over at Yeonjun, chuckling slightly when Yeonjun slapped the seat like a petulant child. He stood up immediately, nearly stumbling over himself, and had to steady himself with a hand on the table before moving to his seat next to Yeonjun.

As soon as Soobin’s butt hit the seat, Yeonjun’s arm was linking with his and he could feel a leather clad leg snaking its way around his own under the table. It made his breath hitch, and for a moment his eyes fluttered shut.

It’s just Yeonjun, he thought. Yeonjun-hyung is the clingiest drunk, everybody knows that.

He had literally seen Yeonjun rub his cheek against Kai’s like a cat once, and he wasn’t even drunk that time. This was nothing to him.

“Baby, baby,” Yeonjun sing-sang, leaning his head on Soobin’s shoulder. It sounded like he was close to falling asleep, as if he was just mumbling under his breath. Across the table, Taehyun was watching them, and Soobin retreated his eyes and just hoped Taehyun’s watchful gaze wouldn’t catch the way his cheeks were heating up.

When Yeonjun turned his head and put his lips against Soobin’s neck, very close to his scent blocker, and hence his scent gland, a shiver ran down his spine. “You’re my baby.”

This is ridiculous, Soobin thought, struggling to stay still and unreactive. Absolutely ridiculous. How the hell else am I supposed to react to this?

Despite himself, he started laughing. Perhaps it was his drunk brain trying to understand what was going on and reacting in the sanest way one could do when your best friend basically mouths at your neck without realising.

A faint, but still very much present smell reached him. It felt wrong to call it Yeonjun’s scent, because Yeonjun was human, and Soobin knew that he didn’t smell the same as others of his kind. There were no pheromones, no emotions to read off Yeonjun’s smell. Taehyun sometimes said he could sense what Yeonjun was feeling, but Soobin thought Taehyun must just be really good at reading Yeonjun, because he himself never sensed anything.

Still, Yeonjun smelled nice. Too nice, actually. So nice, that when Yeonjun leaned back so he could see his face and lit up with a grin, Soobin’s instincts took over.

Oh.

So that was what it felt like.

Soobin’s brain checked out, no thoughts available as he got lost in the feeling of his nose against Yeonjun’s neck, rubbing back and forth while he breathed in Yeonjun’s scent.

He had a feeling that his own scent had started leaking out of the blockers he had put on earlier that evening. If not, he would have just ripped them off, to ensure that he could bathe Yeonjun in his scent and make everyone know who he belonged to. And the way Yeonjun was sitting completely still, clearly enjoying it, it made the heat inside of Soobin boil even hotter as he imagined all the things he would do to—

“Ahem!”

Soobin jerked as a loud and familiar voice broke the little bubble around them, making all rationality sipper back in place in Soobin’s brain. He met Taehyun’s eyes guiltily, biting his lip as he found the younger alpha glaring with narrowed eyes at him.

He tried to reign in his own bodily response, hoping Taehyun wouldn’t fully understand the emotions he’d just gone through. But as Taehyun kept staring at him, he felt like he was going to explode, his ears burning as well now.

Abruptly, he stood up. “I, uh. I’m gonna get some water for Hyung,” he stuttered, throwing out the first excuse he could think of.

He made it over to the bar, stumbling a little in his haste to get away from the table as fast as possible. It didn’t take much time to catch the bartender’s attention, and after he asked for a glass of water, it was only a question of seconds before he was on his way back to their table.

The rest of the night passed in a blur. There was a girl that he walked into, spilling some of Yeonjun’s water on her dress, but she barely took up any space in his mind as Yeonjun had quickly sidled up to him.

The only thing he’d been able to focus on was how Yeonjun smelled so much like him. It nearly went to his head, the way that even with scent blockers he’d been able to cover Yeonjun in his own scent like that. It was one of the perks of Yeonjun being human, not having a strong scent of his own.

At some point, he’d felt Taehyun’s dark gaze on him, and realized that he might need to be more careful if he didn’t want Taehyun to pick up on things. That was a problem for sober Soobin to take care of, though.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Soobin of tomorrow regretted his actions immensely from the moment he woke up with his face squashed against Yeonjun’s chest. Not to mention how his arms were holding onto Yeonjun’s waist strongly, as if afraid he’d run away at some point during the night.

He only needed to take one glance at Yeonjun’s face for it all to come back: how he had scented Yeonjun like that, fully in public with their other friends right there, seeing it all.

He was SO obvious, wasn’t he? Taehyun, if anyone, would know that something was up, but the question was, would Yeonjun? Would he ask, or just chalk it up to another type of ‘best friend’ behaviour from Soobin?

Knowing Yeonjun, he probably wasn’t going to say anything. Even if he thought it was weird, or realized what Soobin had done was strongly instinctual, he wouldn’t connect it to Soobin having romantic feelings for him. There was just no way. Yeonjun would look at him and think he was a little bit weird, but that it was to be expected of his cute, younger best friend.

That’s how he would always view Soobin. Like the cute, weird best friend who was like a little brother to him. Soobin could still remember all the times Yeonjun had made the comparison, saying Soobin was even better than a real brother because they chose each other.

His point was proven when Yeonjun stirred awake and didn’t even blink when he noticed the position they were in. Of course, he wouldn’t mind cuddling his brother-like best friend this closely all night, nor would he think that his own hands being splayed out against Soobin’s naked abdomen was weird in any way.

As he had become accustomed to lately, Soobin bit down his disappointment and acted like normal. There was no need to be bummed that Yeonjun was behaving like normal around him, because that’s what he wanted, right? He didn’t want Yeonjun to wake up and be weirded out after remembering Soobin’s behaviour last night.

Still, his emotions were brewing in his stomach all morning, affecting his mood as they served themselves breakfast made by Taehyun’s mom. It didn’t help that Yeonjun looked extra snuggly this morning, having borrowed an oversized shirt from Taehyun that kept slipping off his shoulder.

After getting the coffee pot to fill their cups, he noticed Yeonjun sitting tense in his seat. Strange, he thought, considering he’d only been away for maybe ten seconds. Surely, that was not enough for anyone of them to have said anything related to Soobin that could set Yeonjun off.

At least he hoped so.

It came as a shock, then, when he was made aware of the existence of a flirty message on his phone.

“Oh hyung~” Kai’s words grabbed their attention just a moment after he had leaned over the table to grab Soobin’s phone. To Soobin’s surprise, he was wearing a growing smirk on his face, contradictory to his previously tortured hungover state.

Taehyun leaned closer to watch what Kai had seen on the screen as well. Soobin contemplated grabbing his phone despite not knowing if it was something he should be defensive about or not.

“Who’s this sending you messages?” Kai continued, turning the screen to show them. “BG?”

BG? Soobin squinted at the screen. He had taken out his lenses yesterday, and hadn’t brought his glasses over to Taehyun’s, so it took him a second to see. When he realized what the message was saying, he was hit by realization. And then embarrassment.

He could feel his face growing red as he snatched the phone from Kai’s grip, even more so when Kai started teasing him.

“That person was clearly flirting with you. Who is it? Did you meet someone yesterday?” Kai kept asking, his tone light-hearted and teasing. “Wait—did you hookup with someone yesterday?”

“It’s… no.” Soobin started, trying to find words to explain himself. He didn’t know why having his friends think he had hooked up with a stranger horrified him so much. Or, well. Of course, he didn’t want one certain friend to think he hooked up with a stranger the same night as they cuddled to sleep. “It’s just a guy I talked to yesterday.”

He glanced down at the phone accusingly, as if it was about to start talking and reveal all his secrets. Suddenly, anger welled up together with a strong urge to yell at Beomgyu for being the whole cause of this situation.

Abruptly, he stood up, sparing no glances at his friends as he moved away from the table. “I’ll be right back,” he exclaimed before rushing to the bathroom.

When the bathroom door was locked behind him, Soobin sat on the toilet and typed out an angry message to Beomgyu.

Soobin
BEOMGYU😠
Why did you send that?!
My friends saw it! Now they think I hooked up with a stranger😠

BG
HAHAHA
That was exactly my intention. Was /that/ friend there?

Soobin
…
Yes

Soobin thought about Yeonjun’s reaction earlier, and added,

Soobin
I think he saw it too

BG
Perfect

Soobin
No, not perfect

BG
Yes, perfect. This is how we get the plan going
Or don’t you remember what we talked about yesterday? You didn’t seem that drunk

Soobin
No no, I remember. I just… didn’t think about it that way

BG
Well, do you see my point then? I could have sent a text about the plan, but I thought in case you weren’t alone, it was risky
And I was right
You should be thankful for my big smart brain

Soobin
Fine. I guess I forgive you

BG
Yay! I’m so relieved!!

Soobin almost snorted at the sarcasm he could read off that text.

Soobin
Yeah, sure
Anyways, can we talk it through before you do anything weird again?

BG
Me? Weird? I would never do such a thing

Soobin
Somehow I’m not convinced

BG
Should we meet up and talk about it then?
Today? I’m free until 6

Soobin thought it through. Even though they never specifically planned anything, he knew that his friends would probably expect him to hang out with them today, because that was what he himself had thought he’d be doing today. But he did feel the urgency to talk to Beomgyu about this, not only because he was worried the other would do something weird. He also felt a string of hope that their plan might somehow turn out successful in the end. It was the first time since figuring out his feelings that Soobin dared do anything to actively try and get Yeonjun to like him.

Soobin
Sure, I have time

BG
Perfect
Like at 12? At Sugar n Spice?

Soobin
That café outside school? Never been, but sure

BG
Slander! Sugar n Spice is the best, how have you not been?
I don’t know if I can look at you the same way after this

Beomgyu actually managed to put a smile on his face then. He was weird, but also funny. And easy to talk to, if he remembered correctly from last night.
Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to hang out and get to know Beomgyu, even if their plan wouldn’t work out in the end.

Soobin
Get over yourself
See you there

BG
See you :P

He spent another hour with his friends before it was time to go and meet Beomgyu. When he announced he was leaving, Yeonjun was the only one to respond, and it was obvious he was annoyed.

“It’s that BG, isn’t it?” he asked, or perhaps stated was more accurate.

Soobin wasn’t normally scared of conflict, but he hated when Yeonjun was angry with him. It was like a cold hand grabbed a hold of his lungs, anxiety pouring over him in an instance.

“I—um,” he stuttered, scratching at his neck nervously. “It’s just, he wanted to talk, so we’re meeting up and—”

“And?” Yeonjun questioned. When Soobin looked at him, retreating his eyes from the floor, he found him looking at him like an angry father about to scold their son, arms crossed over his chest, a deep glare on his face.

Why was he looking at him like that? If he wasn’t interested in him romantically, why did he care who Soobin went out to meet with? Suddenly, his anxiety burned hot as it turned into anger.

“Why are you angry?” he asked, using the same tone that Yeonjun was using earlier.

“I’m not angry.”

“Yes, you are. Why does it matter to you where I’m going?”

He stared at Yeonjun, expecting some kind of answer. The longer he waited, the more frustrated he got, and finally he just huffed and said, “look, Hyung, I have to go.” He shifted his eyes, catching Taehyun and Kai watching the two of them. “I’ll text you guys later.”

On his way to the cafe, he tried to shake off his frustration and focus. He was meeting Beomgyu, sober this time, and hopefully it would be just as comfortable talking to him as last night. He realized that he didn’t actually know anything about Beomgyu, apart from the fact that he was head over heels for Taehyun and apparently shared a few classes with Soobin.

Beomgyu was already inside the café, sitting by a table close to the entrance, so it wasn’t hard to find him. Before sitting down, Soobin took notice of the two drinks Beomgyu must have ordered for them, as well as the notebook placed in the middle of the table.

“You came prepared,” Soobin said in greeting as he slid into his seat opposite Beomgyu. Immediately he took notice of how different Beomgyu looked today, dressed in a plain, oversized hoodie and his face devoid of any makeup. His long hair was tied up in a half bun at the back of his head that made him look effortlessly pretty, not in a way that attracted Soobin, but a way that made him look soft and friendly.

“Of course, what do you take me for, an amateur?” Beomgyu said, shaking his head in mock seriousness. He scooted one of the tall glasses over the table until it sat right in front of Soobin and motioned for him to have it. As Soobin mumbled a small thank you, Beomgyu flipped to a blank page in his book. “If we’re gonna do this, we’re gonna go all in. No backing out. Are you okay with that?”

Soobin was, frankly, surprised by Beomgyu’s seriousness. He’d come across as goofy yesterday, but today he was all business. “Well, depends on what’s this is. I know you explained it yesterday, but the details are a bit blurry.”

“Okay, fair. We need a plan. I’ll tell you what my idea is, and you can give your input?” Soobin nodded, and Beomgyu clasped his hands over the table, giving Soobin a serious look. “Okay. So. I’ll be honest with you. Your friend Taehyun is like the most beautiful person on this planet. I don’t know if I told you yesterday, but I’ve got like the biggest crush, I’m not even kidding.” He paused, perhaps to give Soobin time to register his words.

Strangely enough, Soobin wasn’t bothered much by Beomgyu’s words. Usually, he and Yeonjun could get pretty protective over Taehyun, considering he had for a long time been their youngest best friend (before Kai entered the picture), and so a normal reaction would have been to scowl at the person who held these kinds of thoughts about his precious friend. But for some reason, he didn’t care much when it came to Beomgyu. When he thought about Taehyun and who he would end up with, it didn’t feel too unreasonable to picture Beomgyu in that place. Not that Taehyun often talked (to him) about what kind of person was his ideal type, but at least he knew that if there was one thing Taehyun liked, it was when someone was serious about their interest in him.

When Soobin didn’t say anything, neither to protest or agree, Beomgyu kept going. “I don’t know when I first saw him, but I’ve been trying to come up with the best way to talk to him for ages. He probably doesn’t even know who I am. Actually, I was planning to talk to him yesterday when I saw you guys enter, but I was kinda disheartened. But then you came and gave me this brilliant idea, so now I’m hopeful again.”

Soobin narrowed his eyes at him. “I didn’t do anything; you came up with this idea all on your own.”

“But it’s a brilliant idea, isn’t it?”

“We’ll see about that.”

Beomgyu rolled his eyes and took a long sip of his drink, which Soobin saw now was a pink milkshake that smelled like strawberry. “Okay, so about the plan,” he said, back to business. “Obviously I want to get closer to Taehyun, and since I don’t have a natural way to do that, I was hoping I could use you for that.” When he saw the offended scowl on Soobin’s face, he laughed, and added, “I just mean that you can introduce me as your friend from school or something, and that would give me an in to start a friendship with him, okay?”

Soobin snapped his mouth, not fully convinced but willing to hear Beomgyu out.

“Okay,” Beomgyu repeated. “So, for the actual, active part of the plan, I’m going to act like I’m interested in you, you know, like obviously flirt with you, so that Taehyun will get to know me as friend who is showing interest in you, and he won’t be creeped out by me.”

“Why can’t you just befriend him like normal without the flirting with me part?” Soobin questioned.
Beomgyu seemed to think about it for a few moments. “Well, for one, if he knows I’m interested in someone else he won’t focus on my actions around him as much, because he will think I’m not interested in him. And—”

Without meaning to, Soobin interrupted him. “I actually don’t think Taehyunnie’s gonna hate you if you showed interest in him, as long as you take it in his pace.”

“Well, we can’t be sure about that,” Beomgyu said, biting his lip uncertainly. “But anyways, that’s not the only reason. It’ll be for your sake as well.”

“My sake?” Soobin frowned. “Remind me, how will you flirting with me lead to Yeonjun starting to like me.”

Beomgyu flicked him lightly on the forehead. “Because. He’ll be jealous. Say that he likes you already, he’s going to be green with envy as he sees you showing interest in someone that isn’t him, and he’s gonna finally dare to make his move on you.”

Just the thought of that made Soobin snort. “And if he doesn’t like me already? How is me showing interest in someone else going to help?”

“He’ll realize how precious his time with you is,” Beomgyu suggested. “Like, if suddenly you start hanging out with me, he will realize that he misses you, and when he sees me touching you or telling you you’re pretty, he’s gonna want to do the same thing.”

Soobin gave Beomgyu the longest look of disbelief. “You know as well as I do that that might not happen. If he doesn’t like me like that, he’s just gonna think ‘oh, great, Soobin’s finally got the potential for a relationship’ and move on. Maybe, if anything, he’s gonna ask why I never told him I’m pan, and that might even make him disappointed in me or something.”

“Oh, so he thinks you’re straight?” Soobin nodded hastily. “Hm, that might be a problem. Maybe we should work on that.” He looked at Soobin for a couple of long seconds before smiling. “Well, if nothing else, maybe this can be your chance to come out to him?”

Soobin shuddered at the mere thought of that. He had thought about that a lot, of course he had. Ever since he started to question his feelings for his best friend, he had started to wonder about his sexuality. 

Of course, it wasn’t just black and white, as he had thought when he was a kid. He liked girls, sure, but that couldn’t be all if he also found himself flustered and nervous whenever Yeonjun touched him.

It took him quite some time and research before deciding that he was most likely pansexual. The difference between pan and bi used to confuse him, but recently he had come to the conclusion that his attraction to Yeonjun had nothing to do with his gender.

Yeonjun was just so... Yeonjun. When he started understanding that what he felt for Yeonjun was more than just platonic love, it felt so natural. Like, of course he would come to fall for Yeonjun, because Yeonjun was the most lovable person there was.

As Soobin fell deep into his thoughts, Beomgyu drank from his milkshake and pulled out his notebook. “Anyways, I do think that it’s worth giving it a shot. I’ll do my very best to make sure he’ll be jealous, that’s for sure. I mean, even if he doesn’t get jealous because he likes you, he’s at least gonna be jealous that you spend time with someone else, right? You’re still best friends, and he’s gonna notice if you spend less time with him.”

Soobin sighed. Maybe Beomgyu was right, or maybe this was the worst idea in the history of ideas. But at this point, Soobin was willing to try anything. He was too much of a coward to confess to Yeonjun on his own.

Besides, doing something was better than doing nothing and waiting his whole life to know whether Yeonjun would ever feel the same as him.

Beomgyu saw his hesitation, and added, “Or not, you can just say that I’m super annoying and that you don’t like me at all, you know.”

A snort was pulled out of Soobin, surprisingly. “It’s fine. I don’t know if this plan is morally correct or not, but I’m in.”

Beomgyu flashed him a bright grin and clicked his pen.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

It took them an hour to finish the plan, and then they spent another one just talking and getting to know each other. Soobin realized that talking with Beomgyu was surprisingly easy, in a way it never was with strangers. They had a lot of things in common, and they bounced off each other as if they had already been friends for years.

So, two hours after he stepped inside the café, Soobin left with a giddy feeling.

Walking home, he thought about their plan that they had just written down and agreed upon. It felt so formal, having discussed different scenarios and established rules so seriously, not to mention having written it down like it was an official document they were making.

The first rule they had agreed on was regarding text messages. For one, Beomgyu had to start every text conversation with flirting nicknames similar to what he had done this morning. To ensure the best result, Soobin should try to text Beomgyu often when he was with Yeonjun so the latter would start to wonder who Soobin was talking to. He should, at least in the beginning, act like it wasn’t anyone in particular and perhaps even try to hide his phone from Yeonjun’s view.

Second: in the one class the two of them shared together with Yeonjun, Beomgyu would sit with them and talk to Soobin all the time. “Acting like the lovesick fool I am,” Beomgyu had called it. If possible, Beomgyu might even follow them to lunch occasionally.

Third: Soobin was—and Beomgyu stressed this a lot—never to respond to Beomgyu’s flirting. He could act flattered, sure, and smile at him politely, but he should act as if he was being complimented by a friend. “Act super oblivious, and then you can talk about how you think I’m very nice since I always compliment you, and stuff like how you should have befriended me earlier. That’s gonna drive your hyung mad, because he’s not gonna understand how you don’t see that I’m flirting with you.”

Also, Beomgyu was to increase the flirting after a few weeks, from small compliments to actual pick-up lines and such. To this, Soobin should stop act so oblivious; instead, he should try to act like he’s not interested without actually rejecting Beomgyu.

They also decided that when the timing felt right, Soobin should start inviting Beomgyu to their hangouts. Not too much, as he shouldn’t make it seem like he was too interested, but enough for Beomgyu to get into their group more. That would then give Beomgyu an in to befriend Taehyun, and at that point they would have to reevaluate the plan.
Soobin wasn’t a 100% sure this plan would work out well for him. Not even 50%. But he thought Beomgyu was funny, and he seemed really into Tae, so maybe it was worth it. If nothing else, he could see it as a favour to Beomgyu; that would help him feel less guilty about fooling his friends as well.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

A couple of weeks into their new friendship, Soobin and Beomgyu had found themselves in the habit of meeting up at Sugar n Spice, sometimes to study, but mostly just to hang out together.

“Soobin, I need your opinion about something,” was the first thing Beomgyu said as he sat down in his seat opposite Soobin.

“Hello to you, too,” Soobin greeted with a grin, used to Beomgyu’s manners by now. He was sipping on a strawberry smoothie he’d ordered for himself earlier, and in front of Beomgyu was a large cappuccino that had most likely started to cool down already.

Beomgyu didn’t seem to care about the temperature of his coffee as he immediately sipped on the beverage and put it back down without comment. 

“So,” he enunciated, “I have a concert with my band this weekend, in a sort of big-ish place – it’s kind of a big deal for us, actually.”

Soobin nodded. Beomgyu often talked about his band and how they were looking for gigs that they could play to increase their audience. He had even played a couple of their songs to Soobin, just because the alpha was curious. “That’s cool,” he said, “do you want some audience?”

“That’s the thing,” Beomgyu said, straightening in his seat, “do you think it’s a bad idea if I invite Taehyun to it? Is he gonna think I’m super weird if I don’t invite anyone else?”

“Oh.” Soobin’s smile grew fonder as he thought about how cute Beomgyu was. “I mean, maybe you can say you invited us and no one else could go?”

“But what if he asks any of you and figures out that I lied?”

Soobin nodded thoughtfully. “Yeah, I guess that’s a risk. Tae’s pretty good at figuring things out, even when he’s not even trying.”

Sipping on his coffee in silence, Beomgyu seemed to think hard on the subject. It was silent for maybe half a minute, but it was Soobin who suggested something first.

“I could ask if he wants to go with me to watch you, like, friends supporting you? I mean, I can say you invited only me, but that it would be nice if he came with me. I’m sure he’s gonna come if he thinks he's my emotional support or something.”

“Oh. You’d do that for me? You don’t have to go to my concert, I know rock isn’t really your type of music.”

Soobin waved his hand in the air, “are you kidding? I’d love to finally see you on stage.”

Uncommonly for him, Beomgyu seemed flustered by those words, which Soobin found endearing. He leaned forward in his seat to ruffle Beomgyu’s hair, saying, “I’ll ask Tae as soon as I get the chance. Send me the details of the concert.”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next time Soobin saw Taehyun in person, Soobin brought up the concert quite early in their conversation. They met in the hallway, about to walk to the same building together before parting for their separate classes.

“But Beomgyu-hyung only invited you, though,” Taehyun said with a frown after Soobin had finished explaining. “Are you sure he’s gonna want me there?”

Soobin smiled, remembering Beomgyu’s worry about whether Taehyun would want to come to his concert. “Of course! You’re friends, aren’t you? I’m sure he’s going to be happy to see you there.” He then made a show to look around, as if to make sure no one was listening as he added his next words. “And besides, I think I would feel better if you came with me.”

“What? Why?” Taehyun followed Soobin’s example and glanced around as well. No one was looking at them, at least not more than what was expected when walking through a hallway filled with students.

Soobin flushed for real as he went to answer, because even if he was acting, he always found it awkward to talk about this kind of stuff. “Well, I… I think he might be interested in me. Like, maybe he invited me for it to be sort of like a date, you know?”

Realization was clear on Taehyun’s face. “Ah. But… you’re not interested back?”

“I mean, no? Not really. I like him, but just as a friend.”

That seemed to settle it for Taehyun. “Okay, of course I can come with you. Just tell me when and where, and I’ll be there.”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Saturday came, and Soobin and Taehyun found themselves waiting in line outside of the club where Beomgyu had told them his gig would be. They had arrived maybe half an hour early, and neither of them had expected to see the big crowd queuing outside.

“Is Beomgyu’s band like famous or something?” Taehyun asked as they inched their way closer to the entrance.

“I don’t know?” Soobin looked down at his phone where he had written down the name of Beomgyu’s band. It matched the big sign hanging on top of the entrance, so they surely were at the right place.

“Weeping Angel…” Taehyun read out loud. “I’ve never heard of them, I guess they’re big locally or something?”

It took maybe fifteen more minutes before they finally made it inside. The gig was soon about to start, and Soobin could feel his anticipation building up as they walked around the crowded place.

“Wow,” he heard Taehyun mumble under his breath as they walked into the room where the stage was. The room was dark, but the stage was visible enough to show the assortment of instruments up there. What was most impressive was the people filling the dance floor, all seemingly waiting for the band as they were all facing the stage.

“Do you think there’s time to talk to Beomgyu-hyung?” Taehyun asked.

Soobin grabbed his phone and sent a quick text to Beomgyu. “He said they would start at 9, so in ten minutes. Maybe it’s a bit too late…”
Just as he said so, Beomgyu answered.

BG
I’m getting my makeup done, sorry
But please come by afterwards! We’ll play for an hour maybe

Soobin told Taehyun, and so they settled in not trying to find Beomgyu. Instead, they tried to make their way closer to the stage. It turned out not so easy, as the people weren’t happy with them trying to inch their way past them.

They ended up in the middle of the crowd. Thankfully, both of them were above average height, so they had no problem seeing the stage.

Just then, the stage lit up and five people entered. Soobin realized that he had never asked Beomgyu anything particular about his band. He knew he practiced with them all the time, and that they wrote their own songs, but he had no idea who his members were.

“Oh!” Taehyun pulled on Soobin’s shirt, pointing at one of the guys that had entered the stage first. The guy had long, black hair and very pretty features on his angular face. He positioned himself in front of the mic, so likely he was their main singer. “That’s Hyunjin! He studies the same program as me and Huening, but two years above.” Soobin nodded as Taehyun continued. “I… I think his brother is one of the missing kids…”

Surprised, Soobin looked at Hyunjin with different eyes. If what Taehyun was saying was true, he felt incredibly sorry for the guy. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like to not know what had happened to your brother, while having to keep living life as if nothing was wrong.

“And there’s Beomgyu!” Taehyun said, suddenly waving a hand in the air. Soobin shook his thoughts out and lifted his hand too as he saw Beomgyu stepping onto the stage and positioning himself a few steps to the side of Hyunjin. There, he grabbed the electric guitar and put the strap over his neck. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, Beomgyu did not spot them in the crowd of at least a hundred people.
It took the band a few minutes to get ready and set everything up, but after that there wasn’t a quiet moment. The main singer, Hyunjin, spoke into his microphone, quieting the crowd.

“Hello and welcome everyone!” he started, lifting a hand in the air. “Thank you all for coming. We are Weeping Angel. If you’re seeing us for the first time, my name is Hyunjin. Here on the bass,” he turned to his right, motioning with his entire arm at a guy with spikey blond hair, “is Hyuk, give him some love.” The crowd erupted into applause and cheering before quieting down as Hyunjin continued. “Back there on the drums, we have our Harin.” Another pause, more cheering. “Then on the keyboard, my man Wonhyuk.”

When he turned to his left towards Beomgyu, Soobin prepared to cheer higher than everyone around. “And last but not least, our guitarist and amazing producer, who composes most of our songs, Beomgyu!”

Soobin and Taehyun were jumping and screaming with the crowd. They both noted the delirious look on Beomgyu’s face, and briefly Soobin thought that Beomgyu deserved to always be that happy.

“I hope you’ll have a great night, because we are already enjoying ourselves. Let’s get this started with our first song: Loser=Lover!”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The night passed way too quickly. Soobin hadn’t been to many concerts in his life, but he was sure that this was by far his favourite one. The band had great stage presence, with Hyunjin doing most of the talking with the crowd, and sometimes the five of them joking around with each other and just simply having fun on stage.

After the band stopped playing and more and more people were starting to trickle out, the two friends decided to try and find their friend. Together, they walked while humming on one of the songs from tonight as they made their way closer to the stage.

Beomgyu, who was still up there talking with his band members, suddenly came running when he noticed them approaching. “Soobin! Tyunnie! Come back here, we can go backstage!”

They quickly followed in the direction Beomgyu was pointing and found themselves going through a door to the back. There, Beomgyu was waiting for them with a beaming grin on his face, looking like he had just won the lottery.

When they reached him, Beomgyu pulled them both into a bear hug. “I’m so glad you could make it!” he practically screamed in their ears. He leaned back and grabbed their hands, “come on, let’s go to the lounge.”

It was much calmer behind the stage. The room Beomgyu called the lounge looked like it used to be a bathroom that had been remade to fit as a lounge. It wasn’t huge, but big enough for five band members, it seemed. One wall was covered in mirrors, with chairs placed in front of it. In the middle of the room, there were two couches facing each other, and it was there Beomgyu pulled them.

“So, what did you think?” Beomgyu asked, looking between them with a hopeful look.

“You were great, Gyu,” Soobin said without hesitation. “Both you and the band.”

Taehyun nodded in agreement, but Beomgyu didn’t seem satisfied with the silent answer. “And you Tyunnie? Did you think your Hyung looked super cool on stage?”

In his usual way, Taehyun answered sincerely. “You looked so cool, Hyung. Like, rockstar level cool. And I didn’t know you sing? I really liked your voice.”

Soobin knew Beomgyu well enough to notice that he was flustered by Taehyun’s words. It was the way his eyes widened slightly, the way he immediately looked away and tried to force his smile down that gave him away. That and the way he rubbed at his ears, which Soobin guessed must be flaming hot.

“Ah, Tyun,” Beomgyu said, “you flatter me. I only sing a little, Hyunjin is the more talented singer out of all of us.”

“Sure, he was great,” Taehyun said, “but I think I liked your voice better. It sounded more natural with the tone of the songs.”

“Must be because they’re all your songs,” Soobin added proudly.

“Wait, all?” Taehyun looked more than impressed when Beomgyu nodded somewhat shyly.

“I mean, I didn’t write all of them alone, obviously, but it’s usually me who starts the process and then ask for help from the others. But, yeah.” He shrugged.

“That’s so cool! You’re so talented, Hyung,” Taehyun said, nudging him. “Do you have your songs up on Melon or something?”

Beomgyu’s mouth fell open for a moment before he caught himself and closed it. “We do, but, um, you don’t have to, I mean, just because I invited you here doesn’t mean you have to listen to them.”

“The songs were really good, Gyu,” Soobin added, hoping to take some of the nervous stuttering away from his friend. He took out his phone and pulled up the app, immediately searching for Weeping Angels.

For the next couple of minutes, Taehyun and Soobin geeked out over the number of songs Beomgyu’s band had, trying to give their friend some confidence by complimenting him and talking about what they liked about each song they had heard that night.

Beomgyu looked really happy, like people do when they get to talk about the things they love. As much as he could be loud and weird and annoying, he could also be shy and cute. Maybe it was the atmosphere and Taehyun’s presence that did it, Soobin thought, because he had never seen Beomgyu blush as much as he did right then.

At one point, Soobin left for the toilet, only to come back to Beomgyu showing Taehyun something on his phone, making the younger laugh loudly. Over his shoulder, Beomgyu was looking at Taehyun with the fondest gaze Soobin had ever seen, and it both warmed his heart and made it ache at the same time.

He missed Yeonjun. What was his Hyung doing tonight anyways? Soobin had told Yeonjun he was going to Beomgyu’s show, so that he knew where he would spend his Saturday, but Yeonjun hadn’t told Soobin about his own plans.

Soobin tried his best to not let his thoughts spiral and the jealousy about who Yeonjun might be spending his night with to take over. Shaking his head, he walked over to stand over his friends on the couch.

“What are you watching?” he asked as he retook his seat and leaned over to catch a glimpse of Beomgyu’s screen.

While Taehyun was wiping his tears from laughing, Beomgyu grinned and explained, “He asked if I liked karaoke, so I just had to show him my video of my fantastic rendition of Let it go with Hyunjin. It’s epic.”

“The—” Taehyun hickuped a laugh as he tried to get some words out, “the performance is amazing, Hyung.” He let out a giggle and leaned his head on Beomgyu’s shoulder as support. “The look on your face.”

“And Hyunjin had a voice-crack at the end, it’s the best.”

Soobin laughed along with the others, but perhaps not as violently, as he was shown the clip. The performance was indeed great, and even though they were goofing around Beomgyu managed to hit all the high notes perfectly.

An hour or so later—Soobin didn’t even know; he’d lost track of time somewhere around the discussion about which frozen song was the best—the three of them headed out. It was pretty late so they were about to go their separate ways as they made their way out of the bar, but before they could do so Taehyun asked Beomgyu if he could send him the video of the Let it go performance.

Soobin was surprised—why would Taehyun want that on his phone?—but Beomgyu seemed happy about it. Soobin found out the reason for that the following second.

“Sure. You’ll need to give me your number first, though.”

It was a nice, sneaky way of obtaining your crush’s number, Soobin thought to himself as he watched the two of them take out their phones and exchange numbers. It hadn’t occurred to him that Beomgyu didn’t have anyone else’s number, but when he thought about it, he realized it hadn’t been that long ago that he befriended Beomgyu. It just felt like he’d always been around, because being friends with him came so naturally.

When they finished exchanging numbers and Beomgyu had sent Taehyun the video, they said their goodbyes. Taehyun and Soobin were going in the direction of Taehyun’s car, so they waved as Beomgyu turned around and started walking away.

Before they started walking, though, they saw Beomgyu turn back around and take slow steps backwards at the same time as he called out, “You know what, Tyunnie? If you ever want something to make you laugh other than that video, you can always call me!” and then he turned back around and walked confidently away.

Soobin tried his best to hide his smirk as Taehyun stared after him looking awestruck.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The week after both Soobin and Yeonjun caught a cold—after walking home in the rain when they were already sweaty and exhausted from Yeonjun’s dance class—Soobin could tell that something was off with Yeonjun. They hadn’t seen each other since Wednesday, but they had texted and called each other over the weekend, and Soobin had no idea what he could have done to make Yeonjun mad at him.

It wasn’t until after their first morning class, when they walked with Beomgyu to the cafeteria that Soobin finally understood what was going on.
Yeonjun was acting like Beomgyu wasn’t even there, positioning himself in between Soobin and Beomgyu when they started their way down the hall. He kept his body turned Soobin’s way as they conversed, clearly freezing Beomgyu out and preventing him from joining the conversation. Soobin could tell it irritated Beomgyu slightly, but the walk was too short for it to be a big problem.
In the cafeteria, they headed to their usual table where the two youngest were sitting next to each other, already halfway through their lunch it seemed. Like always, Soobin went for his usual seat next to Kai. It was common for Beomgyu to sneak into the seat next to him, but to Soobin’s surprise Yeonjun stepped around Beomgyu and quite literally stole the seat from him a second before he was about to sit. Soobin looked up at Beomgyu behind Yeonjun’s head, who gave Soobin a ‘wow, really’ kind of look before heading to the other side. At least then, he got to sit next to Taehyun, which Soobin knew he was secretly happy about.

It was pretty clear that there was something off with the tension between them today, but all of them tried to not acknowledge it by talking about their lessons and whatever. Soobin saw Kai and Taehyun exchange looks after glancing Yeonjun’s way, and he couldn’t help but wonder if they knew what it was that had caused Yeonjun’s bad mood.

At one point, Yeonjun left the table to get something to drink. Beomgyu immediately took out his phone and gave Soobin a pointed look before he started typing. Seconds later, several notifications lit Soobin’s phone up, and he grabbed it to read the messages.

BG
Why is he so grumpy???
I didn’t even do anything today?
I swear, if looks could kill I’d be in hell ten times over by now

Soobin
I actually don’t know, he was fine when we talked yesterday

BG
Well, obviously he’s not happy with me
You’re seeing it too, tho, right?

Soobin
Seeing what?

BG
He’s super jealous

Soobin glanced up at Beomgyu, a surprised but hopeful look on his face.

Soobin
You think so? I mean, he sometimes gets a bit grumpy and rude when he’s in a bad mood, but I’ve never seen him so blatantly freezing someone out like rn

BG
Uh, yeah
If he was just angry at me for something I did he would have argued with me
But he’s making sure I’m not anywhere near you
Glaring at me when I try to talk to you, otherwise he’s fine
Obvious jealousy behaviour

Soobin was about to answer when Yeonjun cleared his throat loudly next to him, causing Soobin to jump slightly in his seat. He hadn’t noticed him coming back.

“You know it’s rude to text in the presence of others,” Yeonjun said, his voice stone cold, matching the angry look on his face.

Soobin slowly put his phone down and glanced at Beomgyu. Having grown up with Yeonjun, he knew his many moods, but since Yeonjun almost never got mad at him, he didn’t know the best way to diffuse his anger.

When Soobin didn’t answer, Yeonjun huffed and said, “What were you two talking about that you couldn’t say in front of all of us?”

Soobin swallowed, forcing down the panic that arose at the thought of Yeonjun figuring out what they were texting about. “It’s nothing, really,” he said, voice low.

“Nothing? Then you wouldn’t mind sharing it with us, would you?”

Soobin gaped, taken aback by Yeonjun. Was this what jealousy did? Why was he turning on Soobin as well, then? Couldn’t he see that it was making all of them uncomfortable?

“What’s your problem, huh?” Beomgyu asked when Soobin couldn’t form an answer. He was looking angry now as well, and Soobin was grateful that he dared to stand up for Soobin. “Why is that any of your business? When have you ever cared when one of us used our phones before? You use your phone all the time!”

“That’s not the same thing,” Yeonjun spat back at Beomgyu. “It’s like you’re gossiping about us, with the way you’re being so secretive about it all.”

“Hyung, it’s not like that,” Soobin tried, grabbing Yeonjun’s arm. He wanted his Hyung to calm down, maybe to crack a smile and stop being upset with them. He sniffed once, trying to gather Yeonjun’s emotional state despite knowing he was human, and for once he did sense something. It seemed Yeonjun was so agitated that his normally subtle scent was enhanced.

It dawned on Soobin that Yeonjun was not just mad, he was genuinely upset. And Soobin didn’t like that at all.

“Then what is it like?” Yeonjun snapped.

“Hyung, we were just talking.” Soobin forced himself to sound calm and appeasing. “Don’t- please don’t be mad, it really wasn’t about anything serious.”

They were looking at each other for several long seconds. Some of Yeonjun’s anger was sippering out, and instead he was looking more and more tired. Soobin wanted to ask him if he was okay, and what it was that had set him off like that, but he didn’t get the chance.

Yeonjun shook Soobin’s hand off him and muttered, “whatever. I have to go to class,” before standing and grabbing his tuff. Soobin stared after him as he left, wishing he was brave enough to follow.

“Uhh, what was all that about?” Kai asked, a similarly worried and confused look on his face.

“Must’ve woken up on the wrong side of bed,” Beomgyu commented, going back to his food as if nothing had happened.

“Did something happen?” Taehyun asked, looking right at Soobin now. “He seemed… upset about something.”

Soobin couldn’t help the way his eyes met Beomgyu’s in a knowing look, thinking about what Beomgyu said over text.

“Um, I don’t know,” Soobin said, gaze flickering back to Taehyun.

“Uh huh.” Taehyun looked like he didn’t believe him for one second. “Well, I hope it’s nothing serious. Maybe you should talk to him about it, hyung.”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you.

Soobin gulped. “Why me?”

“Why you?” Kai snorted. “Because if there’s anyone Hyung listens to, it’s you.”

But what if it’s me he’s upset with? Soobin thought. What if he doesn’t want to listen to me then?

Despite not knowing entirely how to deal with this situation, Soobin did his best to talk to Yeonjun later that day. Yeonjun didn’t make it easy for him, though. He went home on his own, and didn’t pick up Soobin’s calls. He also left Soobin’s messages delivered, not even bothering to open them, and it genuinely started to worry Soobin.

What happened the next day made everything worse. It seemed that Yeonjun’s mood had only escalated, and suddenly he was being a real asshole to Beomgyu as they were trying to have a nice evening out at the arcade.

At first, Soobin didn’t want to believe that his precious Hyung was actually behaving like that on purpose, giving him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe Yeonjun didn’t mean to sabotage every game. Maybe he was just having a bad day and it led to him causing the games to fail.

But he was being naïve, he realized, when the night ended with Beomgyu and Yeonjun in a screaming match.

Soobin stepped between them to try and break the argument, but the moment he tried to reach for Yeonjun he just swatted at Soobin’s hands.

When Yeonjun started basically cursing Beomgyu out, Soobin had enough.

“Hyung!” He all but yelled, having to use force to drag Yeonjun away from Beomgyu. Even as he positioned himself in front of the older man and tried to catch his attention, Yeonjun kept trying to walk around him. “Stop! Why are you being like this?”

“I’m not being like anything,” Yeonjun snarled, his tone dripping with venom, and Soobin couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

He ignored Beomgyu’s response, focusing fully on Yeonjun and how to calm him down. He was clearly riled up to the tipping point, and Soobin hated that he didn’t know if he could trust Yeonjun when he was like this. Did he really want to hurt Beomgyu? Or what was the whole purpose of this?

When Yeonjun tried to sidestep him once again, Soobin had enough. He grabbed Yeonjun with perhaps a bit more force than necessary, hands on both sides of his Hyung’s face. “Hyung,” he emphasized, forcing him to meet his eyes. “Will you please stop?”

They stared into each other’s eyes for a long time. Soobin felt the seconds ticking by, but with his focus fully on Yeonjun he didn’t register anything else going on around them.

He could see the fire dying down in Yeonjun’s eyes, and it was like his whole body deflated as the fight finally left him.

Thankful that he was finally getting through to him, Soobin nodded and briefly rubbed his thumb over Yeonjun’s cheek, hoping to give some comfort before letting go. Just for his own sanity, he linked his arm with Yeonjun’s, and it helped him feel like he was still in control over the situation.

Turning, they met the eyes of their three friends. Soobin could tell Yeonjun was avoiding their eyes, shame probably catching up on him.

“I’m taking Hyung home,” he said, meeting Taehyun’s eyes and motioning towards Beomgyu, hoping the younger alpha understood he wanted him to make sure Beomgyu was fine. When Taehyun nodded briefly, he smiled and led Yeonjun away.

It took until they’d been walking outside in silence for nearly ten minutes before Yeonjun finally opened his mouth.

“Soobin I—”

During those ten minutes, Soobin had had time to think about what just happened. He was sure there was something that was bothering Yeonjun now, and he could perhaps admit to himself that it seemed awfully suspicious that Yeonjun was being this way only towards Beomgyu. Sure, he had ignored Soobin’s messages last night, but it could’ve just been because Soobin had asked about what happened during lunch and he didn’t want to talk about it.

Still, even if Yeonjun was jealous like Beomgyu said, it wasn’t an excuse to behave like an asshole. The fact that he did so towards a friend that Soobin had grown to really cherish lately only made it all worse.

“That was really immature of you,” he said, his voice coming out harsher than he expected, but perhaps just harsh enough to show what he was thinking.

“I’m sorry,” Yeonjun was saying, and when Soobin glanced his way Yeonjun was hugging himself insecurely. “I don’t know why I did that.”

It took some sort of self-control for Soobin to not reach out and give some comfort to Yeonjun. He hated seeing Yeonjun upset, as it always made him feel just as awful, as if he was feeling Yeonjun’s pain alongside him.

“You were like that yesterday too,” he said, trying to even out his voice now. “Did Beomgyu do something to you?”

“It’s complicated.”

Soobin stopped walking, waiting for Yeonjun to stop as well and look at him. “Hyung. It’s not like you to be mean to someone on purpose,” he said, giving him a pleading look, hoping to get some answer out of him. “I know you’re not like that. Can’t you just tell me what’s going on, and maybe we can solve this?”

“I... I don’t know, really. Me and Beomgyu just don’t really get along.”

Well yeah. Soobin already knew that, and sometimes it actually bummed him out that Yeonjun seemed to not like Beomgyu. As his best friend, Yeonjun came first in his mind, and when he found himself caring for Beomgyu too, it saddened him that it was hard to hang out with the two of them together. After today, it might be impossible to make it work, if he didn’t get Yeonjun to see reason.
Soobin frowned at him. “It can’t just be that.”

“I’m sorry,” Yeonjun said, his eyes pleading now. “Sorry I ruined the evening.”

Soobin stared at him, trying to understand what the look on his face was telling him. Suddenly, Yeonjun seemed insecure, and Soobin was almost positive there was something he wasn’t telling him. There had to have been something that got Yeonjun to flip his behaviour to fully hostile towards Beomgyu, because before yesterday he had been trying, Soobin could tell.

He hated the thought of forcing the words out of Yeonjun, though. The way he was looking like a kicked dog right now told Soobin enough that he didn’t feel comfortable sharing the reason behind his behaviour. Of course that stung, knowing that Yeonjun didn’t trust him to the fullest, but he also understood. There were things he too hadn’t told Yeonjun, so who was he to judge?

Feeling like just going home and forgetting about tonight, Soobin sighed. He closed the distance between him and Yeonjun and wrapped his arms around him in a comfortable hug. “I think it’s Beomgyu you should apologize to, not me,” he said, leaning his head on Yeonjun’s shoulder.

He felt Yeonjun nod against him. “Still, I’m sorry. I… I’ll apologize to him tomorrow.”

Stepping back, Soobin smiled at him. “Sounds good. Now, let’s go home to yours and watch something?”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Beomgyu had sent a message to Soobin early in the morning the next day, notifying him that he would be absent for a few days since his heat had surprisingly arrived. Soobin had assumed that would mean he wouldn’t hear much from the omega for at least a couple of days. What he didn’t expect was to get multiple texts in a row, over and over throughout the days, from an emotional Beomgyu that was whining about the lack of Taehyun in his life.

The first texts that arrived with Beomgyu’s heat went something like this:

BG
Soobin Soobin Soobin
Soooooooobin
I’m such a coward
Why didn’t I suck it up and talk to Taehyun? I could have had him here right now, and I wouldn’t be so alone
Ah I just want to see Taehyun’s beautiful face
Did I mention Taehyun is beautiful? He’s so damn handsome, you know that right?
Soobin you should probably ignore anything I say, I’m pretty messed up right now
But I wish Taehyun was here
I’m such a loser Im gonna turn off my phone now

Beomgyu had sent the messages within a matter of minutes, in which Soobin had been in class and quite embarrassed by the many notifications that had distracted his professor in the middle of a sentence. Later, when he read the messages, he didn’t know what to think, nor what to answer.
When more similar texts arrived later on, Soobin realized Beomgyu didn’t want him to answer. He was just looking for a means to get out the thoughts in his head.

It was a bit embarrassing for Soobin, though, since most of the texts revolved around Taehyun. In the beginning, they were innocent enough, but when Beomgyu was starting to get deeper into his heat his thoughts about Taehyun did get more… provocative as well. At that point, Soobin had resorted to just deleting the notifications without reading Beomgyu’s texts.

On Saturday evening, when Soobin was preparing to get ready for bed, the sound of his phone ringing startled him in his routine. When he saw it was Beomgyu calling, he was at first a bit reluctant to answer. But as the seconds ticked by, he felt too guilty to let the call go to voicemail, so he picked up with some reluctance.

“Hello?” There came a sniffle from the other side, which immediately sent Soobin into defence mode. “Beomgyu? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Beomgyu answered, and it was evident by the sound of his voice that he had just been crying. He might still be, Soobin thought, but he didn’t say anything about it.

“Did your heat pass?” he asked instead. The question caused Beomgyu to let out a humourless laugh.

“It passed alright.” Then, another sniffle. Soobin realized he had never seen Beomgyu without his walls up, had never experienced what an upset Beomgyu looked like. It meant he didn’t know what way to act to help him, and that didn’t sit right with him.

“Are you alright? You must have called for a reason.”

“Yeah…” Beomgyu’s voice was quiet, as if he was scared of his words getting heard. “I just. I-I don’t know. I just wish Taehyun would like me back.” A sob burst through Beomgyu’s lips, and the sound broke Soobin’s heart.

“Beomgyu,” Soobin said in a soft voice, his heart reaching out to the younger boy.

“It’s stupid, crying over a boy, I know. I just, I feel so tired. And unloved.”

“Oh, Beomgyu.” Soobin gripped his phone harder, determined to make Beomgyu cheer up. “It’s not stupid to cry. People cry over stupid things all the time. Don’t invalidate yourself. And second, you’re not unloved. You have lots of friends who love you. I love you, Beom. I think you’re great.”

Beomgyu let out a wet laugh. “Thanks, Soobin-hyung.”

Soobin didn’t comment on the fact that that might have been the first time Beomgyu called him Hyung, because it didn’t seem like the right time. “Maybe it’s time to shift the plan to the next stage,” he suggested, suddenly remembering the intricate plan Beomgyu had written out and gone through with him so many weeks ago now.

“Huh? Oh… the next stage.” He let out a laugh. “I nearly forgot about the plan, to be honest.”

Soobin couldn’t help but smile at that. “What, did flirting with me come so naturally to you that you forgot it was supposed to be fake?” he teased. “Did you fall for me?”

Snorting, Beomgyu said, “don’t flatter yourself, Hyung. As if I could ever fall for such a stinky alpha like you.”

Soobin gasped in mock hurt. “How dare you call my scent stinky.”

“Meanwhile,” Beomgyu continued as if he had never been interrupted, “Tyunnie smells very manly, very inviting.”

“Please don’t say stuff like that after you just had your heat,” Soobin groaned.

His words made Beomgyu cackle, and Soobin was happy that the sadness was gone from his voice now. “Anyways, the plan. Is it time for you to stop flirting with me and finally show your interest in Tae, or however you worded it?”

“Right. Yeah, okay. I think it’s about time I give Yeonjun a break as well.”

Soobin hummed. “It would be nice if the two of you could get along, actually.”

Beomgyu let out a soft laugh. “I doubt that’s gonna happen any time soon. He absolutely hates me.”
Not even Soobin could argue with that. “Yeah. It’s a shame, I really think you two would get along.”

“Hm, well, who knows. Maybe one day when you and him are together he will finally stop looking at me like his greatest enemy and find that I’m more than just clingy and brainless.”

Soobin bit his lip, stopping himself from arguing with Beomgyu about the first point. Of course, there was no assurance that he and Yeonjun would end up a couple, but it was nice to think of it as a possibility, not just a hopeless dream.

“You’re really not those things, you know that right?” he said, wanting to make sure Beomgyu wasn’t taking Yeonjun’s words to heart.

“Yeah, I know. He sent me an apology, by the way. I mean, it was pretty basic, but at least he tried.”

“That’s good,” Soobin said, glad to hear his Hyung had listened to him. He guessed that Yeonjun had felt pretty bad about it afterwards, since he usually wasn’t one to insult people so blatantly.

“Well, maybe it’s good for our sanity to move on with the plan, like you said,” Beomgyu said. It sounded like he was rummaging around in a drawer or something, and Soobin wondered if maybe he was trying to find the notebook that he had initially written down their plan in.

Not much later, he let out a satisfactory sound, indicating he had found it. “I have the notes, should we get on with revising?”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Soobin didn’t want Yeonjun to go.

It was just over Christmas, merely a week’s time that they would be separated, but he felt a strong sense of worry about Yeonjun leaving him that he couldn’t explain.

“Call me when you get home?” he asked Yeonjun, reluctant to stop hugging him and let him go on the train.

Yeonjun was smiling as he stepped back, moving towards the train that was soon about to depart. “I will,” he said. “See you, Soobin-ah.”

“See you, Hyung.”

When Yeonjun got on the train, Soobin stayed where he was, looking after him. He saw him walk through the compartments in search of his seat, looking up to catch Soobin’s longing gaze one last time.

The appearance of more people blocked the view of Yeonjun as he continued on his way, but Soobin knew that he was there. He stayed for some time more, begging for that uncomfortable feeling in his chest to go away so that he could leave and be happy for Yeonjun, who was going to celebrate Christmas with his family.

He left when the sound of the train whistle alerted its department, feeling lost as he walked through the crowd back to the bus station.

He hadn’t always been so codependent that spending a week separated from Yeonjun made him feel this glum. At least, he didn’t think so. Now was different though, because now his feelings for his best friend were… more complicated.

Shaking his head, he took his phone out to see if he had any messages. He instantly smiled at the sight of a short message from Yeonjun at the top of his screen.

Hyungie <3
Don’t miss me too much soobinnieeee
I’ll be back before you know it

Soobin answered immediately.

Soobin
I’ll try my best

Hyungie <3
I feel so much affection right now, wow
I’ll miss you a lot, at least 😉

After getting on the bus, texting back and forth with Yeonjun for some time, Soobin decided to call Taehyun to see if he and Beomgyu were still out and about.

As it turned out, Beomgyu had taken Taehyun with him on a shopping spree, running through all kinds of shops the last few hours. He half expected Taehyun to beg him to get him out of there, but to his surprise, Taehyun sounded light-hearted and happy. He even laughed at something Soobin couldn’t hear, most likely a stupid joke told by Beomgyu behind the phone.

“We were thinking of going for lunch,” Taehyun was saying, “do you want to join us? Beomgyu wanted to go for Christmas desserts, but I said only if we eat some real food first.”

Soobin was grinning at the thought of Beomgyu being put in his place by Taehyun. He could just imagine how Beomgyu would immediately change his mind when Taehyun didn’t like his idea.

“Sure, I’ll come. Text me the place.”

And so, he joined his two friends for lunch, which helped fill the Yeonjun sized hole in his chest for a little time. After, he went home, having the house to himself for a few hours. He was on and off texting with Kai and Yeonjun for a while, before he decided to game a little before his parents returned from work. They didn’t like him doing it while they were home, so he had to take the chance now that he had it.

When two hours had passed, his parents still hadn’t arrived, so he checked his phone and saw his mom reminding him about a ‘work thing’ at his dad’s workplace that the two of them would attend. It was some kind of Christmas after work that Soobin had completely forgotten about.

Before he could get excited about having the house to himself for even longer, he frowned as he scrolled down and saw the lack of texts from Yeonjun. He was sure Yeonjun’s train must have arrived by now, so why hadn’t he called? Or at least texted that he had arrived?

Well, maybe he’d been caught up in the crowd and forgot to send Soobin confirmation that he had reached his destination. Sometimes it happened, although it was more common for Soobin than Yeonjun, since he was the more absent-minded of the two of them.

It mattered little, anyways. Soobin could just call him himself and check.

Only, Yeonjun didn’t pick up his call. It went through all the beeps until finally, he reached Yeonjun’s voicemail. Odd. Yeonjun always had sound on, but maybe he’d missed it now somehow?

He called again. Still no answer.

Soobin
Hey have you heard from Yeonjun
He said he would call when he arrived but now he’s not answering his phone

Kai
No he texted me half an hour ago but then he didn’t answer my last text
When did his train arrive?

Soobin
I think it was supposed to arrive like 20 minutes ago

Kai
Maybe his phone died?
Don’t worry, hyung will call later, I’m sure

Soobin wanted to be as positive as Kai, but it didn’t make sense. If Yeonjun’s phone died, the call wouldn’t have gone through.

He sent a couple of texts to Yeonjun, calling once more with the same results before deciding to give him a little more time. It would all turn out okay in the end, Yeonjun just had to call him back and everything would be fine.

Maybe he was with his parents, and they didn’t want him to look at his phone? That happened to Soobin sometimes, because his parents valued quality time spent together. He knew Yeonjun’s parents weren’t like that most of the time, but who knew, maybe this time they wanted to give their son their full attention.

Thinking about Yeonjun’s parents, he realized that he could call them, just to make sure. It had been over an hour since Yeonjun should’ve arrived now, so surely if he was with them, they could tell him what was going on.

The call to Yeonjun’s mom was picked up within moments of him calling.

“Soobin-ah! How nice of you to call.”

“Hi Mrs Choi,” he answered, always polite since he never really felt like he got close to Yeonjun’s mom the way Yeonjun did with his parents. “I’m calling because I haven’t heard from Yeonjun since he arrived, are you with him right now?”

“No, sweetie, we’re still waiting for him,” Yeonjun’s mom answered. Immediately, warning bells were ringing in Soobin’s ears. “He said he would come immediately off the train, but we were late so we must have missed him.”

“Wait, so you didn’t pick him up?”

“No, as I said, we were late, and he wasn’t waiting for us where we said to meet up, so I assumed he took the bus home instead.”

“And he still hasn’t come home?”

“No.”

Soobin got up from his seat on the couch, immediately going to turn off the tv and his console. “Something’s wrong,” he said into the phone as he quickly ran down the stairs and headed to the front door. There, he immediately started putting his shoes and jacket on. “His phone is still on, but he’s not answering calls or texts, and he was supposed to arrive a while ago.”

“Soobin, dear, I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation to—”

“No, it doesn’t feel right,” Soobin said, pulling on his coat and leaving the house behind with a bang of the door. “He promised he would call when he arrived. Hyung doesn’t play around with promises.”

“Maybe he met an old friend and forgot to check his phone.”

“No,” Soobin shook his head, rushing down the street. He put Mrs Choi on speaker as he walked so that he could send off a text to his friends about the situation. “He would’ve sent at least a text if that was the case. He’s not like this, he wouldn’t just go silent unless something happened.”

“Soobin, don’t you think you’re being a bit hasty—”

“I’m taking the next train,” he interrupted her, switching over to the app to check for train tickets. “Maybe I’m being hasty, but I have a really bad feeling about this.” There was a train leaving in 20 minutes. He could catch that one, and then he’d be in Busan in a couple of hours. “Please, Mrs Choi, you need to go back there. If you don’t find him, you need to call the police.”

“The police? Now, Soobin-ah, you’re—”

“I’m not being hasty! Something’s happened to Hyung, I know it! Please, you need to call them.”

When Yeonjun’s mom went silent, hopefully thinking his words through, Soobin took a deep breath. He reached the bus stop and conveniently saw the bus pulling up.

“How about this, Soobin,” Yeonjun’s mom said. “I take the car back to the train station, and I’ll check with staff if the train arrived safely. If Yeonjun hasn’t answered any of us at that point, I’ll call the police.”

Well, that was better than nothing.

He agreed with her plan, and they ended the call soon thereafter. He then checked his text messages and saw Kai’s response that he agreed that it was weird, and that he would come with him.

It calmed Soobin a little to know that at least one of his friends took him seriously.

Maybe it was nothing. Maybe he was just overreacting, and Yeonjun had just lost his phone on the train or something, and then he might’ve forgotten where his parents were supposed to pick him up and…

No, it just didn’t sit right with Soobin. Yeonjun might’ve been on bad terms with his parents sometimes, but he was respectful. If he knew he couldn’t contact them, he would ensure to stay in the place they planned to meet up. Soobin knew it.

When Soobin met Kai on the station, he thought that the younger man looked too calm for what the situation warranted. As soon as Soobin told him so, Kai just said,

“I just don’t want to assume the worst. I’m sure Hyung’s fine, but I didn’t want you to go alone.”

“He hasn’t answered his phone in hours, Kai,” Soobin said, hugging himself when they got on the train and found their seats. “That’s not like him. I had a bad feeling letting him leave this morning, and now this…”

“Maybe his phone died?” Kai said, trying to stay positive.

“And he just blew his parents off for hours? Do you hear how that sounds?”

“Yeah…” Kai looked out the window pursing his mouth.

Soobin knew that Kai didn’t like when he got all negative like this, but Soobin couldn’t help being realistic. He just couldn’t see how there were any explanation for this where Yeonjun was… fine. And that scared him a lot. Because as much as he wanted to be realistic, he also couldn’t make himself ponder on what might’ve happened to Yeonjun—

“Kai, can we play something? Or anything that’ll distract me from thinking about, you know…”
Kai was always the perfect man to ask for a distraction, and Soobin had never been happier about his assortment of phone games. He pulled out his phone and showed Soobin the ones he’d been obsessed with lately. He gave Soobin the option to decide, but Soobin just wanted to play whatever game required the most of his mind power.

It ended up being some musical game that he had to focus very hard on, and it was a great distraction for their long ride.

After some hours, they arrived at their destination, and Soobin had Yeonjun’s mom on the phone the moment they stepped off the phone. He’d already called Yeonjun a couple of times throughout the train ride, still with no answer.

“Did you call the police?” Soobin asked as they walked away from the train, looking around for anything that could indicate to them where Yeonjun might’ve gone. Could they ask to see the surveillance tapes? Was there even any cameras around here that could’ve caught Yeonjun leaving the train?

“Not yet, dear, we still don’t know what’s going on,” Yeonjun’s mom answered.

Soobin sucked in a deep breath. “No, we don’t know what’s going on, except that Yeonjun is gone and he could be in danger right now. Don’t you understand that every passing hour is crucial here?”

“Soobin, by all means, go out and look for him, but if I call the police and he ends up having been wandering the mall because he was sulking about something I said, I am the one that’s going to look stupid when the police show up at our door.”

Looking at Kai, Soobin’s face must’ve been the depiction of shock, mouth hanging slightly open.
Did she just say that?

“I—” Soobin removed his phone from his ear, staring at it in shock when he heard the click of the line. “She hung up on me.”

Kai frowned in response to that. “What? What did she say?”

“She said she wouldn’t call the police because when Yeonjun shows up she’s gonna look stupid. As if she’s not even a little worried that something’s happened to him.”

Soobin couldn’t stop himself from starting to hyperventilate in response to her, a combination of panic and anger coursing through him. How could she say that? Yeonjun was her son, and she couldn’t bother to come out here and look for her son?

“It’s okay, Hyung, just forget about her. We’ll look for him on our own,” Kai reassured Soobin, grabbing his arm gently. “He must’ve taken the same train as us, right? So we can just follow the path and see where it’s most likely that he went.”

Soobin felt like he was vibrating in his skin and couldn’t muster up a response to that, so he only nodded. Kai took that as confirmation to drag Soobin with him, and so they walked with their arms linked out of the train station towards the parking lot on the other side of the road. Yeonjun’s mom had told Soobin that that’s where she was supposed to pick Yeonjun up.

“If you were Yeonjun, and you were going off the train, where would you go?” Kai asked, and Soobin couldn’t help but snort at him playing detective.

“I don’t know, Sherlock, where would you go?”
Kai’s face took on a thoughtful expression. “It’s cold, and I’m sure Hyung didn’t dress warm enough, so I would’ve stayed inside the station until my mom texted that she was here.”

Soobin gave him an impressed look. “Huh. You’re good at this.”

“Don’t look so surprised,” Kai pouted.

Soobin pursed his lips, thinking hard. “Should we go and talk to the personnel inside? Maybe Hyung dropped his phone somewhere, or someone saw him getting off the train?”

Kai agreed with that plan, and they went on to talk to the people in the information desk. Unfortunately, it was a dead end, because of course there were hundreds if not thousands of people passing by every day so they couldn’t keep track of each one of them.

So, they were back to square one.

They were standing just inside the entrance of the station now, looking at every person passing by, as if Yeonjun somehow would magically turn up walking past them. Soobin couldn’t afford to miss him.

“What if he didn’t go somewhere, but someone took him somewhere?” Kai suggested, him too looking at all the people around them, albeit with a more sceptical look.

Instantly, Soobin’s heart dropped. He hadn’t let himself play with the possibility that Yeonjun had been taken away by someone but… it was an option, wasn’t it?

“It’s just a suggestion!” Kai exclaimed when he saw Soobin’s expression drop to devastation. “But, like… where would they have taken him, if that was the case?”

“Um, I don’t…” Soobin closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Now was not the time to break down. Time was of the essence. He needed to think.

“Car.” He said, as the thought hit him. “If he was… taken by someone—” Soobin knew it was insane, he was jumping to conclusions, but it was a possibility, wasn’t it? “—then they could’ve taken him in a car.”

Kai nodded gravely. They didn’t say anything else as they made their way over to the parking lot, looking around for anything suspicious.

They’d been walking for maybe twenty meters when Soobin picked up on a strong, unnatural scent. It was… almost like a strong scent of rose, which he never would have smelled in the middle of winter unless someone had accidentally dropped their entire perfume bottle on themselves.

He stopped in his tracks to sniff and try to locate where the scent was coming from. Kai walked a couple of steps before he caught on and stopped as well. “What is it?”

Soobin nodded for Kai to come with him as he followed the scent away from the main street of the parking lot. It was already strong from the whiff he’d caught by the wind, but the more they walked, the stronger it became, until it was stinging Soobin’s nose.

“Somewhere around here,” he said, voice coming out weird as he was holding his nose shut now to prevent himself from choking on that chemical smell. They must’ve been close to the source of it, and Soobin had a feeling it had to be connected to Yeonjun somehow.

“There!” Kai suddenly cried out, making Soobin jump. He turned to catch what Kai was running towards, only to see his younger friend bend over and pick up something from the ground.

“That’s…” Soobin swallowed thickly when Kai came over to show it to him.

“It’s Hyung’s phone,” Kai confirmed, handing it over to Soobin.

He turned it over in his hand and saw the cracked screen. It still had battery, though not much, and Soobin could see all his missed calls and messages on the screen when it lit up for him.

“He hadn’t unlocked it since I started calling him,” he said, trying to rationalize his thoughts. “That means it’s been lying here since he got off the train, most likely.”

Looking up, he caught Kai looking at the phone with big eyes. “What… what do you think happened?”
Swallowing down his own panic, Soobin shook his head. That was the best he could do for an answer. He looked around, but there was nothing strange about this place. It was just a parking lot, scattered with cars…

A thought hit him, and he looked back over to the train station, which wasn’t very far from there. He could see the closest train track from where they were standing, which could mean that Yeonjun had come directly off the train and walked over here. But then… where did he go?

“If he dropped his phone, there must’ve been someone else here,” he thought out loud. “Or he would have just picked it back up. Unless he was running from something.”

“So you really think he got in a car somewhere here?” Kai asked.

As much as Soobin didn’t want to believe it, it seemed to be the only reasonable explanation.

With the strong scent of rose all around him, he couldn’t as much as pick up a whiff of Yeonjun’s weak human scent. Normally, other werewolves left behind a strong trail of scent everywhere they went, but humans were harder to locate using scents. Still, Soobin couldn’t help but wonder if this was intentional.

Had the people that—potentially—took Yeonjun covered their tracks by hiding Yeonjun’s scent?

“We have to call the police,” Soobin told Kai urgently, hoping his friend would take it upon himself to do so. He needed to see something.

He continued walking down the road, following the near choking scent of roses now, until he reached what he deemed the strongest spot of it. There was an empty parking spot, and although there were no visible traces of it, Soobin’s nose told him that this was where the car had been. Someone must’ve poured something out to make sure that no other scents would be caught anywhere around this place.

Perhaps it was suspicious that whoever did this was assuming that werewolves would be coming to look for Yeonjun, but Soobin didn’t care even a little bit about that right now. He crouched right there, in the middle of the stench of roses that had him heaving for breath, unable to move as he pictured Yeonjun being forced into a stranger’s car.

Had they threatened him? Knocked him unconscious? Oh god, what if he was hurt? What the hell did they want with his sweet Hyung, anyways?

Soobin must’ve zoned out for a while, because his ears didn’t tune back in until what seemed to be the end of Kai’s phone call. “Thank you, sir. We’ll wait for you right here.”

“They’re coming?”

It hadn’t dawned to Soobin that he was on his knees on the cold ground until Kai crouched next to him. “Yes, Hyung,” he said sadly. “The police are coming.” He grabbed onto Soobin’s forearms, then. “Let’s get you somewhere warm until they arrive.”

And so, Kai took Soobin back to the warm inside air of the station, where they stayed for maybe fifteen minutes in silence until the police came. Everything moved so quickly after that; the police questioned them for what felt like hours. Someone called Yeonjun’s parents, who arrived at some point. Yeonjun’s mom was by his side, trying to get answers out of him.

Soobin experienced it all through a veil. He knew it was most likely due to shock, but he couldn’t seem to shake himself out of it.

At some point, Soobin and Kai’s usefulness seemed to run out, though. It didn’t matter much to Soobin, he wasn’t really paying attention much to what the police were saying anyways.

And then somehow, Kai and Soobin were on the train back home. Soobin didn’t remember buying the ticket. Maybe Kai bought it for him.

He tried to focus, tried to remember what the police had told them. They didn’t know much, so Soobin had clocked out pretty early, but there were a few things that he wished he’d paid attention to.

“They said it all pointed towards the same league that’s behind the other kidnapping lately,” Kai told him when he mustered enough energy to ask him about it. “Which I think is weird, because those kidnappings have been all around Seoul, mostly. But I’m guessing there is a lot that the public doesn’t know about those cases, so maybe the police know what they’re doing. Who knows, really?”

“What are they—” Soobin asked, trailing off, but thankfully Kai was very accustomed to Soobin-without-energy-talk and understood easily.

“They’re putting out a search for witnesses, firstly, to see if anyone might’ve seen something suspicious. They’re also gonna check the surveillance around the area for anything that could be useful.”

Soobin waited for more, but that seemed to be all Kai had to say. “That’s all?”

“Yeah… I know. But we’ll have to trust the police to do their job, for now.”

Trust the police.

Soobin grumbled about that one sentence all the way back home, wishing he could have shoved something up the ass of the police man who said that, because that didn’t make him feel reassured whatsoever. There had been other kidnapping cases and no one had found the other kids for months now, and he was supposed to just trust that they knew what they were doing when it came to this?

But then again, could he do anything that the police couldn’t?

The sad truth was, no, he couldn’t. The police at least had resources, the means to search for Yeonjun and experience with similar cases. It didn’t make Soobin feel any less useless to know that, though.

At some point, they arrived back in Seoul. Kai must’ve called Taehyun at some point, because the younger alpha came to pick them up at the station. Soobin found himself breathing in his best friend’s strong scent and only then realized that he was being hugged by both Taehyun and Kai.

Taehyun drove them home to his place, where they found Beomgyu waiting for them, looking unsure whether he was welcome there. Soobin could read him in an instant and made sure to tell him that he was thankful that he was there to show his support.

He was even more thankful that he didn’t have to go home to his parents and deal with both their worried questions and having to sleep in his bed alone while knowing that Yeonjun was somewhere else, scared and alone.

The four of them slept at Taehyun’s place, dragging mattresses out to the living room so that they could sleep without having to separate into different rooms. They began with lying on their own mattress, but in his distress, Soobin ended up dragging them all into one big pile, making sure that he could sense all their scents and all of their warmth before he felt even an ounce of safety to fall asleep.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next couple of days dragged on slowly. Soobin called the police every day, first thing in the morning, but he was always left with the same response. He just had to wait for the police to do their job. Frankly, every time Soobin heard that, he wanted to smash his phone into the wall.

He could barely sleep, images of Yeonjun in a million different scenarios plaguing him all night. He didn’t even have classes to distract him since it was Christmas break. While his parents were doing their best to cheer him up, he could see the strain in their smiles. They loved Yeonjun too, but they didn’t feel his absence like Soobin did.

Some days he woke up in a cold sweat, reaching out for Yeonjun as if to save him from the nightmarish scenario his brain had cooked up that night. Things only got mildly better after he woke up fully and realized that it was all in his head, because Yeonjun was still gone and they still had no clue about what was going on.

If he’d been thinking about Yeonjun all the time before, it was nothing in comparison to now. He was either trying to figure things out in his head, working around the holes in the story and trying to find more information about the other kidnappings, or he was wallowing in his own sadness from how much he was missing Yeonjun.

It had been a week and a half since Yeonjun disappeared, and Christmas had come and went, when Soobin was forced back to reality by a certain omega dragging him out of the house.

“Come on,” Beomgyu was saying as he literally dragged Soobin by the wrist out of his bed, “you can’t stay inside the house forever. Let’s do something that’ll cheer you up!”

“Beomgyu, I’m not in the mood—”

Beomgyu stopped pulling and gave him a chilling stare. “I know you’re not, beause you’re in an awful, depressed mood and it’s worrying all of your friends!” His expression changed into a begging one. “Please, just come out for a walk with me. Or a coffee. Anything that will take your mind off… things.”

“You can say his name, you know,” Soobin muttered, running a hand through his hair that he hadn’t washed in days. “He’s not dead.”
I hope.

“Okay, so let me tell you now that Yeonjun would beat your ass if he knew you were rotting away in your bed for over a week like this. I know he’s the extrovert who drags you along to stuff you normally wouldn’t go to, but come on. You can’t let your life fall apart while he’s gone.” Beomgyu went over to Soobin’s closet and pulled out a clean outfit, throwing it at Soobin’s face. “At least change clothes before we go; you stink.”

Ignoring Beomgyu’s last jab was easy. “It’s not like I want to stay in bed all day,” he said, fisting the clothes in his lap now. “I just start to panic when I realize he’s not here and I don’t know where he is and the police are not doing anything about this and—”

“Soobin,” Beomgyu came up and put his hand on Soobin’s shoulder. “You know breaking down isn’t a bad thing, right? And if you want to, we can talk about it, because I have a feeling you’ve been keeping it all in, haven’t you?”

Sucking in a sharp breath, Soobin shrugged. Beomgyu was right that he hadn’t talked to anyone about how he was feeling, but that was just because… what was there to say? Yeonjun was gone and he felt like he was dying because of it? Yeonjun was gone and he missed him and worried about him and feared that something bad was happening to him right now? Everyone already knew all that.

He had specifically avoided talking to Kai and Taehyun lately, because just the thought of talking to them and making their own worries inflate by dumping his depressing thoughts on them made him feel guilty already. If he made them cry by putting ideas in their heads that his creative mind had supplied him with then he would just feel like a monster.

“Hyung.” Beomgyu’s voice pierced through his deep thoughts and made Soobin look up instantly. “You can talk about it with me. Or you can just keep it in, if that’s what makes you feel better. But please, let me take you out of here. Your parents are worried about you. Tyun and Kai are worried. I am worried at this point. And you look like shit.” Beomgyu gave a little smile. “No offense.”

“You look like shit,” Soobin muttered as he forced himself to get to his feet. It wasn’t too hard; he could make an effort for Beomgyu’s sake, this time.

When Beomgyu let out a whooping noise as a response to Soobin getting out of bed, Soobin snorted and rolled his eyes, going to the bathroom to freshen up.

Ten minutes later, he was following Beomgyu down the stairs, feeling more like himself than he had done in days.

His mom, who was sitting by the dining table, looked up when they came downstairs. Her face lit up in what Soobin knew was a relieved smile, and that was when he realized what a toll his near catatonic state lately must have taken on her lately.

“We’re gonna go get a coffee,” Beomgyu told her as they passed by, “I’ll make sure he texts you when he’ll be back, Mrs Choi.”

“Thank you, sweetie,” Soobin’s mom said, smiling at Beomgyu before her eyes fell on Soobin again. “Don’t forget to put on a hat, honey. It’s grown a lot colder lately, and I don’t want you getting sick on top of all.”

“Sure, mom,” Soobin said, smiling in response to her caring manner. The look on her face warmed him, and he told himself he would try to stay out of bed a bit more if it would make her smile like that again.

The moment they stepped outside, Soobin realized that his mom had not been kidding. It had grown an awful lot colder the last few days, but at least there was no snow. Yet.

Beomgyu managed to convince him to go to a restaurant instead of a cafe, because he ‘looked like he needed a proper meal’, and right now Soobin was not in the mood to argue with the omega.

“So,” Beomgyu said, crossing his hands on the table in front of him. They had found a secluded spot at the first best restaurant they passed and had just ordered, so now was the perfect time for Beomgyu to shoot him with questions. “Why have you been avoiding Taehyun and Kai?”

“I haven’t been avoiding them,” Soobin said with a pout, playing with the straw in his soda nervously.

“You have. Or at least, they think that’s what you’re doing,” Beomgyu said, following Soobin’s fidgeting with his eyes. “You didn’t show up for movie night the other day—which, for the record, involved the best cuddle session ever—and you didn’t come out for the obligatory Tuesday hang out; not to mention that you haven’t answered your phone in days! Did you turn it off completely?!”

“I…” Okay, so Soobin felt guilty for all of that. He didn’t mean to neglect his friends like that, it was just… he’d been in a bad mindset lately. He honestly couldn’t remember being invited to those things, much less if he told them he wasn’t coming or if he had blown them off completely. “I didn’t mean to,” was all he could muster up to say.

“You didn’t mean to blow off your best friends for an entire week?” Beomgyu frowned at him, his expression clearly worried. “You turned off your phone and didn’t see their messages, didn’t you?”

“Yeah...” Soobin nodded bashfully. “I just… I don’t know how to function. Looking at my phone… he’s in my background photo, you know, so every time I unlock it he’s there, looking so happy and I… I can’t look at it without feeling like I’m stabbed in the chest, but I can’t change it either, that would be like admitting that he’s gone and just ignoring the problem until it goes away.”

“Well, Soobin,” Beomgyu placed a hand over Soobin’s, stopping him from playing with the glass now. “We all get it, you know. I mean, I’m not exactly friends with Yeonjun, but even I understand that something like this hurts. I’m scared for his sake, too. And if it was me, I would want my friends and family to look for me and worry about me. But I wouldn’t want them to kill themselves with worry for me. Then, when I came back, I would be mad at them for thinking about me more than they thought about themselves. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”

Soobin rolled his eyes. “It’s not like I don’t know that. It’s just hard.”

“I know it is, I’m not saying it isn’t. With how close you and Yeonjun are, I know I can’t even imagine what you’re feeling right now. But that’s not my job here. My job is to tell you you’re doing a shitty job at taking care of yourself and to kick you in the butt until you start doing it better.”

“If you kick me, you know I’ll kick you right back,” Soobin warned. The look he sent Beomgyu earned him a laugh out of the omega.

“There’s the Soobin I’ve been missing lately! I’ve been missing the guy who talks back to me and never fails to humble me when I get too obsessive over a certain gorgeous alpha who—”

“Let’s not start on another Taehyun tirade, please,” Soobin interrupted him.

“See,” Beomgyu pointed at him, “that’s what I mean. I need you to come back to yourself and to hang out with us again, because we’re all missing you.” Beomgyu sighed as he took a sip of his own drink. “Taehyun’s been texting you a lot, actually. I know that, because when you don’t answer, he sends a sad text to me instead. You wanna see it?”

Before Soobin had the chance to answer, Beomgyu pulled out his phone and rapidly scrolled through his own text conversation with Taehyun. There were indeed lots and lots of messages, many from Taehyun’s side, although Beomgyu was scrolling too quickly for Soobin to read what they were saying.

“He’s really worried. For both of you. And I don’t think it’s fair that he has to worry about two of his best friends instead of just one.”

“I get it,” Soobin said. He really did. These Yeonjun-less days hadn’t made him go stupid, just numb and depressed. He could still see reason, and he knew it wasn’t fair to ignore his best friends like that. The least he could do was talk to them and make sure they knew he was alive once in a while.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

After Beomgyu had pulled him out to that restaurant, Soobin had invited Kai and Taehyun to his house. It had resulted in a long talk and an even longer cuddle session. Soobin had even let out a few (read: a lot of) tears as they talked about Yeonjun.

Of course, Beomgyu had been right about how talking to his friends would be good for him. It had been good for all of them, and Soobin came out of it feeling a tiny bit less broken. It also didn’t hurt to know that he wasn’t alone in his pain, and that whenever he was struggling to cope, he could always lean on Kai and Taehyun.

Soon after that day, school started up again, and as much as Soobin wanted to ignore it and stay in his bed rotting away all day every day, his friends did not take that. Taehyun started picking him up for school like he used to do for Yeonjun every single day. He didn’t even give any excuse as to why; he said it was to make sure Soobin was still going to his classes.

While his attendance was flawless thanks to Taehyun, Soobin couldn’t say the same about his focus during the lectures. On that note, Beomgyu became his saving grace—or maybe his grades’ saving grace—as he took it upon himself to go through the content of each lecture with Soobin and lend him his notes from their shared classes. He also started sneaking him snacks to keep him alert throughout the day.

So, Soobin was somehow managing to stay afloat in his studies. That didn’t mean he was doing fine, though.

It was a suggestion from Kai, three weeks into Yeonjun’s disappearance, that led to the biggest change in Soobin’s routine.

It was a Tuesday, and they had met up outside of school out of habit for they weekly hangout. None of them had any suggestions on what to do, and it was very clear that Yeonjun’s absence was weighing them down.

Because they were all thinking about Yeonjun, Kai came up with the idea to go by Yeonjun’s apartment and hang out there. That way, they would feel a bit closer to him, Kai said. Soobin couldn’t help but agree. While the thought of going to Yeonjun’s abandoned apartment made him feel sad, because it would not feel lively at all without Yeonjun there, he also agreed that it would be nice in one sense. Maybe, if he was lucky, some of Yeonjun’s scent still lingered there; he felt like he was going mad now that he didn’t have access to it every day, and he was starting to worry that he would forget how he smelled.

So, they’d spent their evening at Yeonjun’s place, ordering pizza and just hanging out on the couch like they normally would whenever they hung out together in there. It still felt empty without Yeonjun, but Soobin appreciated the sentiment of trying to include him by being in his home.

Only, when the time to go home came, Soobin couldn’t help but linger around Yeonjun’s stuff. The scent of Yeonjun was indeed still there, and Soobin had noticed that it was the strongest around his bed. Most likely, his sheets smelled the most like him.

Taehyun was watching him, waiting for them to leave together, Soobin could feel it.

“Tae,” he said, looking up from Yeonjun’s bed at his best friend. “Would it be weird if I slept here? Only for tonight?”

Taehyun’s expression softened. “Of course not. You know Hyung wouldn’t mind.”

Nodding, Soobin smiled thankfully.

So, the three of them left, while Soobin stayed. That night, he slept while breathing in Yeonjun’s scent, his nose shoved deep into Yeonjun’s pillow.

He slept better that night than he had since before Yeonjun disappeared.

And then he just couldn’t make himself go back to sleeping at home. His parents wondered what was going on, but as soon as he mentioned Yeonjun’s scent and finally being able to sleep, they dropped it. “Of course you should stay there,” his mom had said over the phone in response, and then that was it.

After that, Soobin spent most of his free time—whenever he wasn’t hanging out with his friends—at Yeonjun’s place. It helped him keep himself grounded, which was well needed since with every passing day without Yeonjun, he was getting closer to the tipping point.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Two weeks of sleeping at Yeonjun’s apartment and waking up hoping beyond hope that there would be news about Yeonjun, an incoming phone call from an unknown number pulled Soobin right out of the gutter that his mind had become lately. He’d turned down the call at first, thinking it was a salesperson or something, only for a suspiciously familiar text to arrive from the same number.

Hearing Yeonjun’s voice on the other side of the line after he called it right back was indescribable. Soobin had never felt such ecstatic relief before in his life, and he’d quickly gotten emotional.

He was almost convinced that he was dreaming, and that he would wake up any moment and realize that it hadn’t really happened. He had had dreams like this before, many different versions of himself getting the news that Yeonjun was alright and on his way back home, only to wake up moments before he was about to see Yeonjun again.

This time felt more real than before, though.

He was sitting comfortably in his seat on the train, staring at his phone that told him he had just been in a 15 minutes 37 seconds long phone call with Yeonjun.

There was no way to describe what he was feeling, his insides were a jumbled mess of all kinds of emotions. He was barely holding himself together, fear and worry that this was all fake rising inside him and threatening to take over the stark elation he’d felt when he had heard Yeonjun’s voice.

He felt like crying. Maybe he already was crying, he couldn’t tell. He didn’t know what was worse, the thought of this just being a dream, and having to wake up to the reality of Yeonjun still being missing, or the fear that this was not a dream, and that he would be too late. What if something else happened to Yeonjun while he was on this stupid train? What if those kidnappers were out there, right now, and would find him before Soobin had the chance to reach him?

If that were to happen, Soobin didn’t think he’d survive going back home alone.

The rational part of Soobin’s brain knew that he should probably try to get some sleep if he was going to be of any help to Yeonjun when he got there. Falling asleep now, though, when he finally knew where Yeonjun was, was impossible.

The train ride was exactly 2 hours 35 minutes, and he knew he was going to count each minute as they passed. Thankfully, there was no one else in his carriage, so he was free to freak out as loudly as he wanted to.

The thought of what Yeonjun had told him over the phone—about being tortured and experimented on—made Soobin’s blood boil. How could someone do that to his Yeonjun?

It was getting increasingly difficult to keep calm, near animalistic growls escaping him frequently. He knew he had to calm down somehow, because if he was about to actually see Yeonjun in just a few hours, he couldn’t face him in this state.

He had called Taehyun after some time, quickly explaining everything. Taehyun, always the calm and collected one, helped him make up a plan for what to focus on during this slow-dragging train ride.

One, get through the trip without letting his alpha instincts take over.

Two, get off the train and find the address Yeonjun was at.

Three, stay by Yeonjun’s side until Taehyun and the others came with Tae’s car in the morning.

Four, figure out how to help the people Yeonjun was talking about.

With this four-point-plan, Soobin had something to focus on.

He ended up approaching the list backwards and called the police in Yeonjun’s hometown as soon as he felt calm enough to explain what Yeonjun had told him earlier. Despite not knowing any of the facts, he knew that time was of an essence, and alerting the police as early as possible was important. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much they could do for now, since it was the middle of the night, but they would do what they could until Soobin and Yeonjun had the chance to fill in the missing gaps in the story in the morning.

After that, he focused on the first point. He needed to stay calm, and the best thing to succeed with that was to listen to music so loud in his ears that it was drowning out his thoughts. So, he played the first playlist he found, a playlist Yeonjun had made for him a while ago when he had needed something to distract himself when studying. It made him feel more connected to Yeonjun and helped him to slowly but surely calm his nerves.

The more time passed, the closer Soobin was to accept that this was all real. That he really was going to see Yeonjun again.

He knew he wouldn’t feel completely fine until he had Yeonjun in his arms. Until he could feel that he was really there, alive and well. So, he focused on that. Soon, he’d be able to hold him, and then he would make sure to never let him go.

Finally, his stop came. Soobin was quick on his feet, his bag – which was basically empty, except for his charger and a pair of clothes for Yeonjun – flying behind him as he jumped off the train and went to find a taxi. Once he did, he read the address Yeonjun had sent him, and told the driver to hurry. He couldn’t wait another minute.

And then, Soobin was standing at the gate to a small house, looking like every other house in the area. He checked the address twice before entering.

Suddenly, despite how much he had waited for this moment, Soobin’s legs felt heavier than lead as he made it up the porch to the front door. He once again felt like he was living a dream, and it scared him. He couldn’t stand the thought of waking up any moment now, before he got to lay his eyes on Yeonjun for the first time in weeks.

Once outside the door, he hesitated before knocking. It wasn’t a dream, he told himself. He even pinched his arm, just to make sure. It had to be real.

So, he knocked. And almost immediately, he heard footsteps behind the door.

He could sense the other person standing just behind the door, but still, it didn’t open. “Yeonjun?” he asked, moving closer to the door and raising his voice slightly. “Hyung, it’s me.”

“Soobin.”

Hearing Yeonjun, even through the door, made his heart rate spike and a gasp rip through him. It felt like a pressure building in his chest, a feeling that only seeing and feeling that Yeonjun was real would be able to relieve.

“I’m here. Will you open?” He didn’t understand why Yeonjun was hesitating, but he also didn’t want to rush him, so he forced himself not to touch the door handle. Otherwise, he would have ripped it open in an instant.

“I just…” Yeonjun’s voice was quiet, but Soobin’s sensitive ears heard him well enough. “Remember what I told you? That they experimented on me?”
Soobin wanted to hum in response, but it came out as more of a growl. Still, Yeonjun seemed to take it as an agreement.

“Mm, okay, good. So just… promise me you won’t freak out?”

Whatever he was talking about, Soobin would have agreed to anything if it meant Yeonjun would open the door. He tried to make the words make sense when he answered, “Promise,” but he didn’t understand at all. Why would he freak out?

But when Yeonjun opened the door and he was hit by a scent stronger than anything he’d ever experienced before, he understood.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Everything that happened after that point was like a blur to Soobin, as if the world had turned into a mush and the only thing Soobin could see and focus on was Yeonjun. Yeonjun who was there next to him, looking and sounding basically the same as before, but at the same time who was completely changed in Soobin’s eyes.

Yeonjun’s new, strong scent was everywhere, wrapping Soobin up in a lustful mindset that he couldn’t seem to get out of. Not to mention how his instincts were acting up all the time without his approval. Whenever he saw Yeonjun, or got a whiff of his scent, he wanted to pull him into his arms and cover him in his own scent. He wanted to hide him from the eyes of everyone else, to keep him to himself because that would be the only way to make sure he was safe.

Of course, he had to let Yeonjun out of his sight when the time to go rescue the other kidnapped boys came. Taehyun was the one who had to deal with Soobin, then, who was moments away from leaping out the window and running to Yeonjun’s aid the entire time they were forced to stay at the police station.

“Hyung, calm down,” was Taehyun’s constant line for the hours that it took before they got the message that everything had gone well. Taehyun had also been pumping out his own pheromones constantly to try and subdue Soobin, but with his alpha going crazy inside of him, Soobin was matching his pheromones with ones that were even stronger.

Only after he had Yeonjun back by his side, and they were reassured that they could go back home and that everything was okay did Soobin finally breathe out. At that point, he realized what a nuisance he had been to Taehyun, but there was no space to tell his friend he was sorry about it until later.

Later, meaning when they were in Yeonjun’s apartment, waiting for their Hyung to come out of the bathroom was when he finally got the chance to apologize to Taehyun.

“Tae I, um,” he said, keeping his voice low in case Yeonjun’s new, sensitive ears were capable of hearing them, glancing at Kai and Beomgyu briefly before focusing his eyes back on the other alpha, “I’m sorry for how I acted before, it was—”

“Hyung,” Taehyun interrupted him, also speaking in a low voice, “don’t apologize, not for that.”

“But I was—”

“I know you were difficult,” Taehyun said with a smile, “but you were honestly less volatile than I expected. You held yourself together well enough, considering everything.”

“Oh.” He glanced at Kai, the now only human in their friend group—how crazy wasn’t that thought???—to see if he was finding all of this weird. But the youngest was only looking at him with a soft, understanding expression on his face, and it was only then that Soobin realized (quite stupidly) that he wasn’t the only one who was feeling immensely relieved now that Yeonjun was back with them.

“I was, uh, wondering,” Kai said, glancing over at the bathroom door where they could all hear the shower still going, “like, what happens now? Is hyung just… is he going to be, you know, like this forever?”

None of them knew the answer to that. Taehyun, ever the rational one, was the first one to speculate.

“Well, I’m pretty sure something like this has never happened before. The crazy part is… he smells just like an omega.” He glanced at Soobin as if looking for agreement, but Soobin wondered if there wasn’t a hidden meaning behind that look as well. “But who knows if it’s permanent, for all we know, those… people could have injected him with stuff that just made him smell like an omega for now.”

“That doesn’t explain his eyes, though,” Beomgyu added, a frown between his eyebrows.

Soobin wanted to groan. Or maybe growl. The not knowing, in combination with the anger he felt towards those people who did this to his precious Hyung, made it once again hard for him to stay calm.

“He should see a doctor, right?” Taehyun said, looking between them all. “A doctor would be able to say what’s going on with him.”

“Don’t you think it’s too early?” Soobin asked in concern. “He just came back from being locked in that place—and you heard what they did to him! The last thing he’d want to do is to go into an environment that would remind him of that, don’t you think?”

Taehyun hummed. The two alphas stared into each other’s eyes for a couple of long seconds, having an unspoken conversation between the two of them that even Soobin wouldn’t have been able to put words to after.

“Okay, so how about this,” Taehyun said then, retreating his eyes from Soobin, “Soobin Hyung asks his mom to give Yeonjun a check-up, and she can give us an idea about what’s going on? And then we’ll see what she suggests we do?”

They all nodded in agreement. Soobin pulled out his phone to send a text to his mom, who was quick to answer, saying that of course she could take a look at Yeonjun.

They were in the middle of discussing what to eat for dinner—Yeonjun’s first dinner back with them—when the click of the bathroom door being opened alerted them and silenced them in an instant.

Yeonjun had pulled on a new pair of clothes—an oversized black hoodie and a pair of wide sweatpants. He was almost covered from top to toe, only his head sticking out of the hoodie, his wet hair pushed back to reveal his forehead.

A very familiar sensation came over him, like his stomach just dropped through the floor at the sight of Yeonjun, and Soobin had to swallow and pinch himself to remind himself this was not the time to forget himself. In fact, now it was more important than ever that he kept his feelings under wrap around Yeonjun.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Seeing Yeonjun struggle when his mom gave him a check up wasn’t exactly fun for Soobin, but he knew it was needed. They needed to know what those people had done to Yeonjun and if there was any health concerns that needed to be taken care of urgently.

He had made sure to stay by Yeonjun’s side the entire time, supplying him with calming pheromones whenever his own spiked in distress.

After they were done, his mom suggested that Yeonjun go to the hospital in the morning, and Soobin could tell Yeonjun was reluctant to do so even as he said yes. While his words came out calm and collected, Soobin could tell by the stiffness in his shoulders and the way he was trying to hide how his hands were shaking that he was on the verge of a breakdown.

Soobin stayed by his side when the breakdown finally came, letting him cling to him and breathe in his calming pheromones until he found his footing again.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next morning, Soobin was reluctant to wake Yeonjun up. He looked so peaceful where he was curled up on his side in Soobin’s bed. Their friends had gone home after Yeonjun had fallen asleep early last night, so it was only the two of them there.
Soobin had been unable to leave Yeonjun alone after he fell asleep, anxiety filling him at the mere thought of being separated right now, so he’d slept right there by his side, trying and failing to keep a distance (they had somehow ended up wrapped around each other during the night). At least Soobin had woken up first, so Yeonjun would never know that Soobin had been scenting him in his sleep. It was a habit he’d been doing whenever they cuddled since they were kids.

He didn’t want to wake Yeonjun up, but his mom had gotten Yeonjun a doctor’s appointment that would be bad to miss. He gave himself some time to just bask in Yeonjun’s presence, both to enjoy looking at him, which he hadn’t been able to do in so long, and to breathe in his heavenly smell that he could never get enough of. Then, when there was only an hour left, he decided it was time to wake the sleeping beauty.

Yeonjun was extra hard to wake this morning, but when Soobin pulled out the big guns (calling him by his childhood nickname) Yeonjun shot fully awake in an instant. Soobin couldn’t help but laugh at that and made a mental note to use that nickname more often from now on.

He watched Yeonjun with a fond look as he stretched out his limbs and began to sit, only for his calm expression to disappear in an instant when he caught sight of Yeonjun’s full face and noticed something that hadn’t been there yesterday. Without thinking, he reached out and took a hold of Yeonjun’s chin, holding him in place as he stared at the blue spot.

“What happened to your face?”

“Huh?”

“You have this—” Soobin reached out, wanting to touch but at the same time not touch in case it would hurt Yeonjun “—is that a bruise?”

Yeonjun immediately placed his hand over the bruise as if to hide it. “Oh! Yeah, I hit my face yesterday, it’s nothing to worry about.”

That was clearly an excuse made to calm Soobin, but he saw right through it. “You didn’t tell me you got hurt.”

“Binnie, I’m fine. It’s a bruise, it will go away in a few days.” He smiled. “It was worth it, anyways. Now the other boys are home with their families, finally free.”

Soobin let out a sigh. “You’re lucky you’re fine. I would’ve been so mad at you if you got yourself badly hurt in this mission.”

He chuckled when Yeonjun stuck out his tongue at him. “I’m pretty sure you’d be worried out of your mind, rather than mad, if I’d hurt myself. No need to pretend, you sappy alpha.”

You sappy alpha.

Yeonjun had just called him alpha.

Soobin’s mouth fell open against his will, and he had to fight hard to reign in the striking desire that suddenly shot through him.

Oh fuck. He couldn’t control his scent, no matter how much he tried to keep still and force down his reaction.

Shit. He couldn’t be turned on right now, this was so incredibly inappropriate.

Not knowing what to do, Soobin coughed and looked away, scratching at the back of his neck. He just had to hope that Yeonjun didn’t pick up on that sudden shift in his scent, that would be so damn embarrassing.

“Um, mom will probably want to leave soon,” he said, moving to stand so that he wouldn’t have to be too close to Yeonjun while he still felt like this. “So, get up and get dressed, please.”

When Yeonjun got out of bed, throwing the covers off almost violently, it sent a large whiff of his scent straight into Soobin, which wasn’t exactly helping him calm down the bubbling desire. His face scrunched up as he tried to not let the enticing scent get to him.

Yeonjun looked at him strangely, and Soobin worried he might have caught onto something. But when he spoke, he did so quickly, as if he was suddenly embarrassed, “Maybe I should, uh, get a quick shower before we go.”

Soobin got busy as Yeonjun went to shower, making the bed and changing into a nicer outfit himself, before sitting on the bed and turning on that same playlist he’d been listening to on the train.

When Yeonjun got out of the shower, Soobin gave him some privacy as he got dressed by turning his back to him. He was quite startled, then, when Yeonjun came up behind him and threw his arms around him.

It was a totally normal hug, nothing out of the ordinary for the two of them. Yeonjun had always been touchy with him like this. Only, now when Yeonjun’s nose pressed against his neck, a different sensation spread through him at the thought of Yeonjun deliberately trying to scent him—even though he logically knew that Yeonjun didn’t know what he was doing. It didn’t help that he only smelled his own scent from Yeonjun even after he’d showered, which meant he must have gotten dressed in some of Soobin used clothes.

Soobin had always been possessive over Yeonjun, and had always loved when the older man dressed in his clothes because it meant he would smell like him. But with Yeonjun as an omega now, it was somewhat different. Well. It was and it wasn’t.
What it did, was give Soobin a raging headache, as he couldn’t keep up with what his own instinctive reactions to Yeonjun now.

Soobin’s mom came not long thereafter and drove them to the doctor, making sure to remind Yeonjun about calling his parents, which ultimately led to Yeonjun asking her to do it for him. Soobin understood his worry, and wished he could take away his fear, because no one should be scared of their parents’ reaction after having been through what he went through.

He stayed with Yeonjun for as long as he could, making sure to be by his side when his parents came, in case he needed him. It was not easy being there and seeing Yeonjun struggle, both to go through the medical tests and to talk with his parents.

After Taehyun arrived, it got too crowded very quickly. By that point, they had been there for hours, and Soobin could tell that Yeonjun’s parents (especially his mom) were getting annoyed that they weren’t given some privacy. That led him to suggest that he and Taehyun give them some space, at least until they were done with the last test of the night.

Soobin could tell that Yeonjun didn’t want him to leave though. He tried to send out signals that he wasn’t going to go far, and that he’d be back very quickly, but he couldn’t tell if Yeonjun understood it.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The moment they stepped out of the hospital room and the door closed behind him, Soobin sagged against the nearest wall. The air out there was crisp, devoid of Yeonjun’s thick scent that Soobin had been subjected to for the last few hours. He hadn’t even realized how much distressed pheromones Yeonjun had been sending out until now that he was devoid of them.

He hadn’t been able to think in there, and it was about time that he left the room to give himself some breathing space.

The look on Yeonjun’s face as he suggested leaving though… He felt bad, but he couldn’t exactly tell Yeonjun that he needed to leave or he’d suffocate.

“You okay, Hyung?”

Soobin jerked in surprise. He’d almost forgotten that Taehyun was there with him.

“Uhuh,” he mumbled, forcing himself to stand instead of lean against the wall. “It was just a bit… stuffy in there.”

Taehyun snorted. “Says you, who was pumping the room full of your pheromones.”

“That’s…” Soobin gulped guiltily. “I wanted to help Hyung.”

“I know.” Taehyun patted him on the arm, smirking in that knowing way of his that made Soobin wonder if he could see through all his carefully put up walls.
Does he know? What does that smile mean?

The longer Soobin stared at Taehyun, the more felt himself start to freak out. He wasn’t sure why, exactly. Taehyun was his best friend, second only to Yeonjun, and if there was anyone he was comfortable revealing his secrets to, it was Taehyun.

But speaking the words that he’d only spoken out loud to Beomgyu before was harder than he expected.

“Hyung?”

Taehyun’s smile dropped as soon as he saw Soobin start panicking, and now his eyes were big as he tried to figure out how to help.

“What’s wrong?”

Soobin just shook his head, unable to speak. He tried sucking in large gulps of air, only to feel a different kind of panic arise in him at the absence of Yeonjun’s scent. He had been basking in it for hours, and now suddenly it was just… gone.

“Hey, come on, Hyung,” Taehyun was suddenly pulling on his arm, looking around. “Let’s go somewhere private.”

He let Taehyun pull him down the corridor. The younger alpha put his ear on each door they passed, until he found one that was seemingly unoccupied.

The door closed behind them, and Soobin stumbled into the middle of the room.

“Hyung,” Taehyun asked desperately from behind his back.

Soobin couldn’t fight the urge to hide away, putting his hands over his face and closing his eyes.
“Hyung?” Taehyun repeated, this time much closer.
Soobin was, frankly, on the tipping point of a panic attack. While he didn’t have them often, the feeling wasn’t foreign to him. It was the first time it had happened when he wasn’t alone, though.

Having Taehyun speaking in his gentle tone of voice so close behind his back made him lose all composure and turn around immediately.

“Tae,” he all but wailed, throwing himself in his friend’s arms. “I don’t know what to do. I’m freaking out.”

Being taller than Taehyun, Soobin had to bend down to lean his head on the other alpha’s shoulder. It was slightly uncomfortable, but when Taehyun’s arm came up to rub reassuringly across his back, he forgot all about his discomfort.

“Why… why are you freaking out?”

Lifting his head, Soobin was surprised to find tears in his eyes. He wiped them away and sniffed. “It’s just… this whole situation with Yeonjun-hyung. I—I don’t know what to do.”

Taehyun was still clearly not understanding, judging by the look on his face. “I think you’ve been handling it really well, Hyung,” he said, and immediately Soobin started shaking his head in response.

“No,” he said. “I mean. Yeah. I’ve been trying not to freak out but… it’s so hard, Taehyun-ah.”

“What’s hard?”

Soobin sucked in a rapid breath. Could he really say it? He had admitted it to himself a while back, but to say it out loud was a whole different thing.
Lifting his gaze, he met Taehyun’s eyes. There was nothing but genuine worry and curiosity in his gaze, and Soobin knew he was stupid to be so scared to speak his mind.

This was Taehyun. Taehyun, who was as close as a little brother to him. Why should he be scared to tell him, when he’d never been anything but supportive in Soobin’s life.

“Tae,” he said, taking a deep breath again. “I’m in love with Yeonjun-hyung.”

He waited patiently for Taehyun’s reaction but… it just didn’t come. Somehow, he had shocked his best friend so bad that he had completely frozen, eyes and mouth wide open.

It went on for so long that Soobin started feeling shy. “Stop looking so surprised,” he said, sporting the biggest pout he could muster and slapping Taehyun’s arm.

The quiet smack that came with the slap was what finally got Taehyun to react. He shook his head, probably trying to wrap his head around what Soobin just admitted. “You… you’re in love. With Yeonjun-hyung.” Soobin nodded slowly, but it didn’t even seem like Taehyun was paying him any mind. 

“Choi Soobin is in love with Yeonjun-hyung. That’s… that’s just…”

“Is it really that hard to accept?” Soobin whined questioningly. “He’s the most lovable person, you know that. We both love him.”

“But you’re in love with him.” Taehyun looked like he was doing his best to act normal, and Soobin was actually feeling just the same right now.

“I am.” Soobin closed his eyes and let out a loud groan. “I love him. And now everything’s gonna be ruined because I didn’t tell him, and now he’s an omega.”

“Hold up. What are you talking about?”

Soobin avoided Taehyun’s gaze, because he didn’t know how to explain himself without breaking out in tears again. These were thoughts that had snuck up on him during the quiet moments ever since he opened the door to find Yeonjun smelling so damn good, and he had barely had time to gather them into something he could explain out loud.

When Taehyun gently grabbed his wrist and pulled him with him, Soobin didn’t resist.

“Come, Hyung,” Taehyun said. “Let’s sit down. Don’t freak out, we’re gonna figure things out, okay? Just breathe and it’s all going to be okay.”

Soobin allowed himself to be pulled to the closest hospital bed. Once they were seated, Taehyun was watching Soobin in anticipation while the older was wringing his hands over and over, having a hard time finding his words.

“If you don’t know where to start, can I ask questions?” Taehyun suggested, trying his best to be helpful in this situation.

“Okay.” Soobin’s voice was barely a whisper, but thankfully Taehyun seemed to hear it all the same.

“Mm, good.” Taehyun said. “So, tell me. How long have you, you know, liked him?”

Soobin wrung his hands together in his lap. “A while.”

“And that means…?”

“A year? Two years? I honestly don’t know.” Soobin sucked in a rapid breath and continued. “All I know is I figured it out a few months ago.”

“Months ago? So, like, before or after Hyung was kidnapped?”

Soobin snorted. “Before. Definitely before.”

After Soobin’s answer, Taehyun was quiet for several seconds. He glanced up, curious to see what Taehyun was thinking, and saw a deep frown on the other alpha’s face.

“Could you tell me what you felt when you saw Yeonjun was an omega?”

Soobin’s eyes widened. No. He did not just ask that.
He rapidly shook his head in response.

“Why not?”

“Too embarrassing.”

Taehyun chuckled a little. “Hyung, it’s only me here,” he said, leaning forward a little to catch Soobin’s gaze even when he was trying to avoid looking at him. “I’m not gonna judge you.” He waited a few seconds, then added, “but of course, you don’t need to tell me anything if—”

“I felt like I saw my mate for the first time!” Soobin blurted out, then immediately hid his face in his hands again. In that position, he started rapidly spewing out words, because once he’d started, he could just as much continue. “He smelled so good, I almost fainted. Yeonjun-hyung’s always smelled good, his scent has always been my favourite, but now it’s so much more, and I almost didn’t know how to handle it. I had to hold my breath when I hugged him… it was messing with my head. And it’s just been escalating since then, like this morning I almost—” he sucked in a deep breath, deciding that it was better to not let those thoughts out.

Soobin couldn’t see Taehyun’s face, but he was sure that the other alpha was nodding in understanding. Taehyun had always been smart, and he was surely going through every single moment he’d seen Soobin around Yeonjun and analysing it.

“Hyung,” Taehyun said after some time in silence. “You know that’s completely normal, right?”

“It’s not normal!” Soobin threw his head up, looking at Taehyun wide-eyed. “It’s not normal to go from being a nice smelling human to an omega that smells like… that.”

“I meant that it’s normal that the person you’re in love with smells much better than everyone else, Soobin-hyung.” Taehyun put a gentle hand on his friend’s arm.

Soobin breathed out heavily. “I know. It’s just… I can’t handle it. It’s, I—” He could feel his entire face flush hot and avoided Taehyun’s eyes once again.

“What?”

In a moment of vulnerability, Soobin decided to just say it. He clenched his fists hard and took a deep breath.

It didn’t come out the way he expected it to, though.
“HisscentturnsmeonsoyouneedtogethimscentblockersbeforeIdosomethingstupid.”

Taehyun let out a surprised snort. “Uh. Say that again, please.”

Still bright red, Soobin sighed. “His scent, it… turns me on, okay? I’ve never experienced this before; I don’t know what to do. I mean, of course it’s not weird that he turns me on because I’m super attracted to him and he’s gorgeous and I love him, but I can’t go around getting aroused whenever I see him, I even had to push him off earlier because he just smelled so—”

“OKAY,” Taehyun said, interrupting him abruptly, a cute little blush appearing on his cheeks as Soobin’s words probably flustered him. “I understand, just stop rambling.” Taehyun shook his head again as he tried to digest everything he just heard. “Now, let me just… you’re in love with Yeonjun-hyung. Have probably been so for years. Okay. And now he’s an omega, which makes you even more attracted to him than before, or, no, more like your body reacts stronger to him than before. This far I understand. But you said everything’s gonna be ruined now… I don’t understand why?”

Pulling in a long, almost painful breath, Soobin tried to explain. “I don’t mean that him becoming an omega means everything is bad, I just—I’m scared.”

“Scared that…?”

“I’m scared that he’s gonna think I’m only interested in him because he’s an omega.” Soobin paused, only to realise something far worse. “Or, wait, what if he’ll be attracted to me against his will, just because there’s this common attraction between alphas and omegas. Oh god, I didn’t really think about that before. Oh no, what if—”

“Soobin.” Taehyun quickly took a hold of his wrists, gently tugging on them to the side to get Soobin to face him. “Don’t freak out. I understand that you’re afraid, and I’m not trying to undermine your reaction, but I swear it’s not going to be as bad as you think.”

“But he doesn’t even know I like guys,” Soobin sobbed. “I don’t want him to think it’s just biology that makes me like him.”

“Shhh, hyung,” Taehyun whispered, releasing his wrists just to give him a hug that was long overdue. Soobin rubbed his face against Taehyun’s neck, breathing in calming pheromones as Taehyun released them. It wasn’t the norm for alphas to use pheromones on each other, but in moments like these, Soobin couldn’t care less about what was customary or not.

“Don’t worry, hyung,” Taehyun reassured him, whispering into his ears as he rubbed Soobin’s back up and down. “We’ll figure it out. We’ll get him some scent blockers, for starters.”

“Thank you,” Soobin sniffled, finally able to relax against Taehyun’s sturdy chest.

He felt Taehyun’s hand patting his head and nearly laughed at how funny this must look to an outsider. Still, he was touched by how gentle Taehyun was with him.

“Hyung knows you better than anyone,” Taehyun said. “If you explain all of this to him, he’s gonna listen to you, you know that right?”

Soobin did know that. It was still nice to hear, to be reminded of it.

It was true. Yeonjun was his best friend in the whole wide world, always had been, always would be. If he revealed his true feelings, and Yeonjun didn’t feel the same, he wouldn’t just randomly be disgusted with Soobin. He was, like, 98% sure of that.

Yeonjun would be understanding. He would listen, and he would reassure Soobin that it was okay. And if needed, he would even be a shoulder for Soobin to cry on, despite that the cause behind Soobin’s tears would be him.

Maybe this was why Soobin fell in love with Yeonjun in the first place. Yeonjun was his everything, and even if all hell broke loose, he could always trust that Yeonjun would never leave his side.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Soobin didn’t think he could be more annoyed with his dad than he was right now. Over the past few months, he had told him again and again that he wished he would stop trying to talk him into finding a suitable mate. For a minute, he had thought his dad had understood and given up, because he hadn’t mentioned it in weeks now. Soobin had hoped that maybe he would see that the only one in Soobin’s eyes was Yeonjun, and wait for Soobin to – hopefully, one day – take the step to ask Yeonjun out himself.

But no. His dad had always wanted to take matters into his own hand.

It was hard for him to hide his frustration when he was sitting in a café with his dad next to him, a girl that he had never met before sitting in front of him.

He hadn’t even been warned about it. His dad asked him to meet him for a lunch like any normal dad and son might meet up and eat together once in a while. Not that it was common between them, but he thought it was nice that his dad wanted to spend time with him, especially now that he was spending most of his time at Yeonjun’s place instead of at home with his parents.

So Soobin had, like a fool, showed up sensing nothing out of the ordinary. He’d even left Yeonjun alone at home (home being Yeonjun’s apartment), still asleep at 11 am. He hadn’t wanted to wake him, because he’d seemed so peaceful, and Soobin was sure Yeonjun needed the extra rest.

When he’d found his dad and this girl – clearly an omega, who wasn’t shy to let her scent out – sitting there, and his dad had ushered him to sit down in front of her, he hadn’t been quick enough to escape.

Lee Gahyeon, her name was. She was really cute and seemed to be a nice person. Normally he wouldn’t have had anything against her, maybe he’d even consider being friends with her, but in that moment he was too annoyed with his dad to make much of an effort. Still, he hated treating her badly, so he tried his best to stay polite and kind, albeit answering her questions very shortly.

“Gahyeon’s mother is a CEO,” Soobin’s dad was explaining, going on to talk about the company she owned and how influential she was. Soobin couldn’t care less. He could see how this was the reason he had suggested Gahyeon as a possible mate for Soobin, because it was a good match for their families as well. Soobin hated that thought.

“I was working at the company for a year,” Gahyeon filled in as Soobin’s dad gave her the opportunity to speak. “But after that I felt like I wanted to move on, so now I’m studying—”

Soobin barely registered her words. He knew he would feel a bit bad later for not even remembering what she was studying, but in that moment he couldn’t make the effort to care. All he could think about was how he could get out of there without completely pissing off his dad.

When the barista at the café came with their orders that they had placed earlier, Soobin took his chance to take a look at his phone for the first time in maybe an hour. His dad had made him silence it before coming, saying it would be rude to let it interrupt.

To his surprise and slight alarm, there was a missed call from Yeonjun, followed by two from Taehyun only a few minutes later. Then, a couple of texts from Tae that had his heart jumping out of his chest.

Tyun
Hey, where are you? Hyung’s very sick and he needs help.
I’m out of town so it’s gonna take too long to get back to the city, are you able to go to him?
Soobin?
I can leave now but if you are anywhere closer please go to him, he needs you

The last text was from just four minutes ago, and Soobin hurried to answer it. He didn’t care that his father was eyeing him angrily as he did so. His hands were shaking and his heartbeat was loud in his ear as he typed out a quick answer.

Then he got up from his seat, explaining that he was leaving.

“You are what?” his dad asked, baffled. “Soobin, what do you think you’re—”

“I need to go,” he stated firmly, giving his dad a hard look. Then, he shifted his eyes to Gahyeon with an apologetic expression in them. “I’m truly sorry, Gahyeon-ssi, for not being what you expected. It was nice meeting you, and you seem lovely, but my best friend needs me right now, so I can’t stay.”
He bowed his head to her, before grabbing his coat and leaving.

“Soobin!” he heard his dad call after him.

“Talk to you later, dad,” he spit back without turning around, his anger at his dad boiling under the surface.

As soon as he was out of there, he started running.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Seeing Yeonjun in that kind of pain was the second worst thing Soobin had ever been through—the first having been the weeks living without knowing if Yeonjun was dead or alive. The fact that Yeonjun had been in pain for days without telling Soobin, and now it had reached the tipping point into something unbearable bothered Soobin a lot. Had he done something that made Yeonjun feel like he had to hide it from him?

The fear for Yeonjun’s health in combination with his anger at himself for not being there for Yeonjun caused him to maybe react a bit too strongly, carrying Yeonjun in bridal style into the emergency room as if he was bleeding out in his arms.

“Bin-ah, I think I can walk,” Yeonjun had said when Soobin opened his taxi door and put his arms under him, protesting weakly. In Soobin’s eyes though, he looked weak, too weak for his liking.

“No way,” was all Soobin said, and then Yeonjun was in his arms, and he was running to the entrance.

When the nurses found them coming inside, Soobin had hoped they would be seeing a doctor immediately, so his disappointment was apparent when they were told to sit down.

He tried to keep his expression under control, not wanting to distress Yeonjun with his own emotions, but when Yeonjun nodded to the nurses and said it was not urgent, Soobin couldn’t stop the growl that escaped him. He balled his fists over his knees and looked away, not knowing what he would do if he looked at Yeonjun and saw him scrunch up his face in pain like that again.

Controlling his own actions after that was impossible. It was almost like he could feel Yeonjun’s pain by just sitting next to him, his chest aching with worry every time his Hyung flinched or whined from another jab of that torture. There was nothing he could do, not even using his pheromones would help with this, and he was feeling desperate.

In his mind, he would pull Yeonjun into his lap and make sure he was comfortable. The way he was sitting in the waiting room chair, sliding down to try and find some position that hurt less, was unacceptable. He was moments away from doing so, to give Yeonjun his body and his warmth to slump into, when Yeonjun’s name was finally called.

After the doctor called them and brought them to a room, Soobin stood behind Doctor Lee, not wanting to interrupt her by being in the way. His heart was beating harder than ever in his chest, and it was getting hard to stand still the more time that passed. Dr Lee was asking Yeonjun questions and prodding at him, touching him in the places where he was hurting most. It was all Soobin could do to force himself to be still. If he’d let his own instincts take over, he might’ve done something stupid like push her hands away and taken Yeonjun right into his arms so he could keep him safe.

Soobin was so stuck in his own mind, focusing on staying calm, that he only came back to the conversation when Dr Lee said she would leave to consult her colleagues. She was speaking directly to him, suddenly. “I will be back in a few minutes. If it gets worse, call for a nurse.”

“Worse?” Soobin swallowed, watching her leave the room.

“Binnie,” Yeonjun said, pulling Soobin’s attention back over to him just in time to see him scrunch up his face from another wave of pain.

Fuck, Soobin thought, feeling like he was stabbed in the chest as well. He tried controlling his face, but it was near impossible right now.

“Don’t worry, Soobinnie,” Yeonjun said. “We’re at the hospital, remember? I’ll be o-okay.”

Well, there was some truth in that, at least. There wasn’t another place where Yeonjun would be safer than here, assuming the doctors would do their job right.

He’ll be okay, he tried convincing himself, repeating the words over and over in his head. He’ll be okay. He’ll be okay. If I just stay by his side, he’ll be okay.
Soobin couldn’t take the distance between them any longer, so he walked over to Yeonjun’s side and took his weak hand in his. He was cold to the touch, which alarmed Soobin, but with nothing else to do, he tried to focus on warming up Yeonjun’s hands with his own.

The doctor came back and gave Yeonjun painkillers, finally. After that, there were a number of tests they had to go through. This time, it didn’t seem to bother Yeonjun as much as the last time, perhaps because he was so focused on the pain and not the fear of the hospital.

“You’re a peculiar case, Yeonjun dear,” the doctor said when the preliminary test results came back. Soobin didn’t like the sound of that, especially not when it seemed like she was tired when she said the words.

When he questioned her, asking for a better explanation, the answer didn’t calm him much. Hearing that Yeonjun’s pain was most likely coming from his body making its final adjustments to becoming an omega was shocking and scary, not to mention angering.

If Soobin ever got his hands on those scientists…

“I’m afraid your boyfriend will have to go home and come back in the morning when visitor hours begin,” Doctor Lee said suddenly, her gaze falling on Soobin.

Soobin could laugh at the absurdity of the situation. 

First of all, if she thought he would leave Yeonjun’s side, she was sorely mistaken. Second, this being the first time in a long time someone thought they were a couple (it used to happen a lot back in high school, when they were in separate classes but spent ever free minute together), now that being Yeonjun’s boyfriend was both the one thing he wanted the most and the thing he least cared about in this exact moment, was ironic.

“He’s not—” Yeonjun was quick to correct her, which Soobin had to admit did sting a little, but he didn’t let it get to him.

“Are you sure I can’t stay? I don’t want to leave him.”

He was purposefully being polite, knowing that would get him further than arguing. If she were to say no, though, his non-polite side would come out.

Thankfully, she didn’t refuse him.

When she left, Soobin couldn’t fight his instincts any longer. He leaned down over Yeonjun, who was still lying with his head on the thin pillow, the bed tilted slightly upwards to have him closer to sitting. Like this, Yeonjun was looking so vulnerable, his skin pale and his eyes droopy as the painkillers were likely starting to get to him.

He cupped Yeonjun’s face, turning it this side and that just to make sure he could see all of Yeonjun was fine. A stark wish to smell Yeonjun’s scent hit him, and his eyes instantly zeroed in on the scent blocker on Yeonjun’s neck. He knew it was his own suggestion, and it had been good for his sanity to not smell Yeonjun all the time, but lately he had been starting to hate his own idea. He missed Yeonjun’s scent, because with the blockers he couldn’t even get a whiff of that barely there scent that he was accustomed to his whole life. Yeonjun had always smelled great, even as a human, and having him completely scentless was a tragedy to Soobin’s alpha instincts.

Instincts that, right now, he had quite a lot of trouble reigning in. They told him to rip away the blockers so that he could smell Yeonjun and could wrap him up in his own scent him, making sure that everyone around them knew that Yeonjun belonged to Soobin.

Normally, he’d question his own possessive thoughts, but right now, they were too strong. He needed everyone to know that he was claiming Yeonjun’s as his, and no one else had a shot.

“I’m fine now,” he heard Yeonjun mutter, his lips moving and drawing Soobin’s attention over to them. His pink, pretty lips, that Soobin had dreamed about, the way they would feel against him, wrapped around his—

Oh fuck, Soobin almost didn’t catch himself in time. Going completely still, he focused his gaze on Yeonjun’s eyes again. Here he was, getting all wrapped up in his alpha instincts and dirty thoughts, staring down at Yeonjun as if he was prey when he was in fact laying in a hospital bed, having been through worse pain than Soobin could imagine.

What was wrong with him?

He just prayed that Yeonjun hadn’t caught onto what kind of thoughts were running through his head. Reality washed over him real quick, and suddenly, a completely different emotion had him almost choking up as he looked at his best friend.
The look in Yeonjun’s eyes was questioning, and Soobin fought to form his worries into words.

“I was away,” he said, looking away from Yeonjun briefly, “and I didn’t answer my phone when you called. What would I have done if—if you weren’t fine?”

“Soobin.” Yeonjun’s hands suddenly wrapped around Soobin’s wrists, catching Soobin by surprise. “It’s not your fault, so don’t feel guilty about it. You heard Doctor Lee earlier, the worst is over and I’m going to be fine. Okay?”

Any dirty thoughts from earlier were gone with the wind, and there were only sentimental feelings left in Soobin as he met Yeonjun’s gaze. Part of him wanted to fight, to make Yeonjun see that he was a bad best friend—a bad alpha—but the longer he looked into Yeonjun’s soft gaze, the more the fight in him died.

Eventually, he realized that there was no point in fighting. Yeonjun wasn’t in as much pain now, and they had gotten some answers, even if they weren’t exactly very reassuring. There wasn’t much more to do now, except let Yeonjun’s body rest and finalize this… whatever Dr Lee had called it before. He hadn’t paid much attention to the words she’d used.

After that, Soobin joined Yeonjun on the bed, making sure to be gentle as he wrapped his arms around him. His wish to have Yeonjun in his arms to keep him safe and warm was finally fulfilled, and it didn’t take them long until they were both slumbering peacefully.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

It was starting to bother him that Yeonjun was struggling so much with being an omega. Not because he was offended Yeonjun couldn’t get used to being one of his own kind, but because he hated seeing Yeonjun feeling so insecure. Yeonjun, who was the depiction of confidence, who never struggled with going out in public or being seen shirtless before. Now, he couldn’t even shower with the lights on (Soobin had noticed it early on), and he hadn’t once been caught changing his clothes in front of Soobin now.

Not that he had to, but… it was a bit scary to see his behaviour changing so much.

Of course, Soobin wasn’t stupid. Trauma did that to people. And considering everything Yeonjun had been through—kidnappings and torture, his own body being modified against his will—Soobin thought he was being extremely strong.
Still, he hated seeing him struggle without knowing what to do to help.

When Beomgyu had surprised them with the idea of giving Yeonjun lectures on how to be an omega, Soobin had been angry at himself for not thinking about it earlier, but extremely proud of Beomgyu for having the idea. Beomgyu, who was very slowly getting on better terms with Yeonjun, was willing to put their differences aside to help a person in need.
Maybe he wasn’t so happy about the not so flattering images Beomgyu had chosen to use as examples in his lecture, but considering they had made Yeonjun laugh, he could ignore that.

So, he could see that with time, things would become better. Yeonjun would learn, with the help of all of them. Still, they were taking slow, baby steps, and Soobin wished he could just turn back the clock and make sure Yeonjun would never have to go through all that.

Sometimes the trauma became too much for Yeonjun to handle.

The breakdown before they left to join their other friends at Beomgyu’s place had been scary. And it was all Soobin’s fault. He’d forgotten himself, maybe because this was the first time in weeks he was seeing Yeonjun shirtless, and his horny thoughts were hard to control.

He didn’t mean to ogle him like that. He just couldn’t control the way his eyes fell on that smooth skin, where there used to be abs but now there were broad hips that he totally hadn’t expected. Yeonjun had been hiding his body in large clothes lately (although most of his old clothes were big on him, since he still hadn’t gained back all the weight he lost while kidnapped), and Soobin had guessed there would be small noticeable changes to his body, he just hadn’t seen it yet.

There was no version of Yeonjun that wasn’t attractive to him. He was just as hot now as he was before. It was just, the shock of seeing him so suddenly made Soobin choke up, overcome with thoughts about Yeonjun’s body.

Only, Yeonjun had taken his stare in the complete opposite way. He’d thought Soobin was shocked because he looked weird. Even worse, he’d used the word ugly.

There was no universe where Soobin would find Yeonjun ugly. Absolutely impossible. He had to reassure Yeonjun of that when he held him gently in his arms, showering him with compliments. Soobin was very bad at giving compliments normally, but in that moment, when Yeonjun was being so vulnerable in his arms, they flowed out of him naturally. Because he’d always been awed by Yeonjun, had always looked up to him and put him on a pedestal since they were kids. He was the prettiest person in his eyes, and small changes like that to his body was never going to change that.
He just had to convince Yeonjun that was the case, without making him realize how much feelings were behind those words.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

Yeonjun found himself back in Beomgyu’s apartment the day after their get together, sitting awkwardly on the sofa as Beomgyu prepared something in the kitchen. Staring out Beomgyu’s enormous window at the city—of course the view had to be perfect as well—an uncomfortable feeling settled in his stomach.

When Beomgyu had asked him to come have the lesson at his place, Yeonjun’s initial reaction had been dread. After yesterday’s revelations, all he’d been able to think about was how he’d treated Beomgyu terribly for nothing.

Had he hated Beomgyu only because he thought he was interested in Soobin? The answer was very clearly yes, and now that he knew that it had all been fake, the guilt was swallowing him whole.

“Do you like fruit?” Beomgyu came back into the living room. Just as Yeonjun looked up, he put a huge plate containing all sorts of fruits you could imagine on the table in front of Yeonjun. “I’m weak for anything sweet, but I thought this could be more refreshing.”

Yeonjun watched as Beomgyu popped a strawberry into his mouth, gulping. “Yeah, sure. Fruits are good.”

“Nice,” Beomgyu just said, before pulling out his computer and hitting a few buttons to start sharing his PowerPoint on the flat screen.

The title of this PowerPoint was The juicy Omega stuff.

Yeonjun didn’t know whether to laugh or hide his face in embarrassment.

“Beomgyu,” Yeonjun started, pausing to wait for Beomgyu to look at him. Damn, why was Beomgyu acting so normal right now? Wasn’t he affected by the tension between them? Could he not sense Yeonjun’s immense discomfort? “Before we start, can we just…” He looked down at his lap, having suddenly forgotten all words he wanted to say.

He hadn’t even planned what to say. He just knew he needed to apologize, in some way. Because that short text message he’d sent back then when Beomgyu’s heat hit was a shitty apology, and now that he knew just how much he had misinterpreted things, he had to say something.

“Hm?” Beomgyu tilted his head in confusion when Yeonjun didn’t continue.

Yeonjun gathered himself and looked back up. “So, after what you told us yesterday. I want to apologize. I was a total asshole to you, and I don’t even know why I was so harsh, I just know that it was totally uncalled for. And like… now that I know you were only putting on a show, I had to say something.”

It was silent for two seconds, seconds that Yeonjun could feel the tension like a buzz against his skin, before Beomgyu broke it with a snort. “You were such an asshole.” He clapped Yeonjun on the arm in a friendly manner. “Remember when you sabotaged me all night at the arcade? I knew you were just acting like that because you were jealous, but that night I almost let it get to me, because you were just soooo annoying.”

Yeonjun sputtered. “I—what, you… I wasn’t jealous. That’s not true.”

Mentally, he facepalmed himself. Great, very subtle, Yeonjun.

Beomgyu laughed. “You were green with jealousy. Just because Soobin couldn’t see it doesn’t mean I didn’t.” There was a teasing glint in his eyes. “It’s fine, I get it. Soobin’s your best friend, you’re used to having his attention on you. Of course, you’d be jealous.”

Yeonjun eyed Beomgyu suspiciously, unsure whether the look he was giving him meant he was being sincere or if he was seeing right through Yeonjun and his badly concealed crush. Feelings of love. Whatever.

“You should be glad that I’m such a nice person,” Beomgyu continued, smirking, “being able to forgive you after all that, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, you’re so great,” Yeonjun answered monotonously, which earned him a whine from Beomgyu.

“Hey, you want me to forgive you or not?”

“You just said you’ve forgiven me!”

“I said being able to forgive you, there’s a difference!”

Yeonjun raised both eyebrows, giving Beomgyu the most tired look. “Fine, I’m sorry. You’re a great person, a really good friend and a surprisingly good teacher. Without you, my transition into an omega would have been hell. Happy?”

“Very.” Beomgyu grinned, nudging Yeonjun with his elbow. “I knew you liked me!”

“Don’t get hasty now,” Yeonjun grunted, but Beomgyu just laughed heartily in response. After some time, Yeonjun rolled his eyes. But sort of in a fond way.

“Okay, then.” Beomgyu turned towards the computer and pressed for the next slide to appear. “Let’s get this started.”

The first thing they went over was the omegan anatomy. Beomgyu had apparently thought long and hard about Yeonjun’s worries after his return from the hospital, which led him to his very detailed description of the differences between the human and omegan bodies.

“So, basically, our assholes are stretchier and can take in much more than humans can.”

Yeonjun forced down a violent cough, startled by the straightforwardness. “I see.” A blush was spreading across his neck as he tried to act unaffected by Beomgyu’s words.

“That’s a positive change, right? Oh! Wait, did you use to take it or give it before?”

Blinking, Yeonjun deadpanned, “what?”

“I don’t remember what it’s called,” Beomgyu said, waving his hand in the air in front of him. “You know, humans aren’t designed to do one or the other, like we are. So, did you, like, prefer to take it up the butt or were you the one sticking it in?”

Yeonjun groaned, not believing that this was an actual conversation he was having with someone he had just started to possibly consider a friend. “This is a really disturbing conversation to have with you,” he answered. When Beomgyu kept looking at him as if he waited for an answer, he groaned again. “Fine. I used to bottom. That’s what it’s called when… you’re on the receiving end.”

“Oh great!” Beomgyu beamed, not affected in the slightest. “Then your preferences will not have changed.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Well, because of our biology, we omegas are basically made to ‘bottom’. Like, we have a dick and it does feel nice to stimulate it and all, but it’s like nothing in comparison to taking it—”

“Can you stop saying ‘taking it up the butt’ all the time?!”

Beomgyu gave him a funny look. “Are all humans this queasy about this kind of stuff? It’s just our bodies, and sex is completely natural. Why can’t we talk about it?”

“Ugh,” Yeonjun grunted, running a hand over his face. “I’m not used to it, is all. Keep going, I guess.”

Unfortunately, even when Beomgyu moved on from talking about the omegan body, they still kept on the topic of sex. Apparently, it was very important that Yeonjun knew everything about how sex between an alpha and an omega worked, almost as if he expected him to experience it in a near future. The thought was almost funny to Yeonjun.

Even though he was uncomfortable the entire time, he had to admit that he learnt a few things he hadn’t known before. As the only werewolves he had been close to in his life were alphas, he had never heard about the fact that all omegas could self-lubricate. Knowing that his own asshole could probably do that now, though, made him feel a bit weird.

The second time Yeonjun found himself growing completely red was when Beomgyu mentioned the act of ‘knotting’.

“Considering you grew up with Soobin and Tyun, you’ve probably seen them naked a few times, right?”

Yeonjun did not particularly like Beomgyu pulling Soobin and Taehyun into the picture when they were still on the topic of sex. “Uh, yes. Why?”

“Good. So, you know that alphas are big down there, right?”

“If you ask me about Tae’s dick, I’m literally gonna strangle you,” Yeonjun threatened, giving Beomgyu a serious look.

The younger let out a laugh. “Fiiine, I’ll save that conversation for later, then,” he joked, rolling his eyes. “No, but what I was getting to is that even if they are normally big, that’s not even all. So, when having sex, when alphas get close to orgasming, there’s a possibility for them to grow even larger, essentially so large that it’s not possible to pull it out again.”

Yeonjun’s brain malfunctioned for a few moments. “W-what? What the fuck?”

“It’s called knotting. It doesn’t happen every time, and it’s more common when the alpha is on rut or the omega in heat. Basically, it happens so that there is a higher chance for the sperm to stay inside and make the omega pregnant, since the alpha can’t pull out for a while.”

Yeonjun was quite sure that neither Soobin or Taehyun had ever mentioned this fact to him. Why should they have?

So, Yeonjun wasn’t a prude, he’d had a few hookups here and there, and didn’t shy away from talking about sex. He’d had many conversations about his preferences and his experience with Taehyun over the years, and Kai was very open for these kinds of conversations.

With Soobin, though, he’d just never been able to make himself talk about those kinds of things. And since Soobin never brought it up either, he felt like that was some kind of grey area in their relationship, a kind of silent agreement between them to just never bring it up.

“How long does it last?” he asked Beomgyu, biting his lip nervously. Suddenly, he couldn’t help imagining Soobin like that. Had he ever had sex with an omega? Had he knotted them then? Why had he never said anything about it?

“About half an hour, I would say.”

Half an hour with a dick stuck in your ass?

Okay, Yeonjun could imagine more compromising positions, but still. 30 minutes was not a short time. What if it happened with someone you didn’t like, and then you had to wait for half an hour before you could even physically get away from them?

Beomgyu must have noticed the turmoil in Yeonjun’s head, because he added reassuringly, “it’s not that bad, from what I’ve heard. If you like the alpha, it can even be seen as a bonding moment.”

If you like the alpha—

What would it feel like, to be that close to Soobin, one day? He could imagine it easily, his imaginative brain pulling out an image that was similar to what he’d been dreaming of before. Cuddling after sex, keeping as close as possible because Soobin’s cock was still buried deep inside him, keeping him warm and full and—

“Anyways,” Beomgyu said, interrupting Yeonjun’s line of thought. It was probably for the best, considering Yeonjun could feel a string of arousal about to run down his spine. “Next slide.”

Their lecture continued for two hours, mostly because Beomgyu would get off topic and try to give examples to make it easier for Yeonjun to understand.

When he walked home, after the two of them having had ramen together, Yeonjun’s head was spinning with all that new information. Everything from stretchy assholes and knots to how to know you’re going into heat and what suppressants were.

He had to admit that having the lesson alone with Beomgyu hadn’t gone as badly as he expected it to. It had been kind of fun, kind of bizarre, but all in all a pretty useful lesson. It also dawned on him when he stepped back in the apartment that he was very glad that it had only been the two of them at this lesson, because the first thing Soobin asked was what they had talked about. And there was no way he could survive mentioning knotting and self-lubrication in front of Soobin.

He wasn’t that comfortable with his omegan status. Not yet.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

For the last nearly two weeks since his escape, Yeonjun had made sure to keep in contact with all the guys. It was mostly just asking how they were doing and checking in on them more than anything. He still felt very close to all of them, there was just too much in his head to think about what they could be going through as well.

When Juyeon had called him and asked if he wanted to meet up with him and Chanhee that Sunday morning for brunch, he was more than happy to say yes.

He waved goodbye to Soobin – who said he would hang out with the other three in case Yeonjun wanted to join them later – and went on his way to the café they had decided to meet at. For some reason he couldn’t even understand, he was getting nervous as he walked there.

It’s just Juyeon and Chanhee, he told himself. We’ve seen each other at our weakest, so a normal brunch is nothing.

When he arrived, he waited outside for a moment, wondering if he was too early. He was just about to send a text saying he was there when he heard his name called from a short distance.

“Yeonjun!”

He lifted his head and saw Chanhee and Juyeon walking up to the café. They were both clad in thick jackets to shield them from the winter air, and it was a stark difference to how Yeonjun was used to seeing them. Even from a distance, he could tell that there was more colour in their cheeks, and they looked to already have gained back some of the weight they had lost.

An even bigger surprise than their attires was the fact that they were walking hand in hand.

“Hey guys,” he said, instantly raising his eyebrows as he glanced down at their joint hands. He didn’t have time to ask about it, because before he knew it, he was wrapped up in Juyeon’s arms.

“It’s so nice to see you,” Juyeon said against him. Yeonjun briefly noted that Juyeon smelled very nice, a very toned down but still very comfortable scent of linen.

Yeonjun said the same back as Juyeon moved out of his embrace. He let out a surprised huff when Chanhee also hugged him, even if the hug was much quicker than Juyeon’s had been.

They went inside the café, and not long thereafter they were seated at a table with their orders before them. “So,” Yeonjun said, fixing his gaze on Chanhee, “when did this-” he pointed between the two of them “-happen?”

He remembered Chanhee being very clingy with Juyeon after they had escaped, so it didn’t really come as that big of a surprise that they seemed to be together now. Still, he would really like to know how it had played out, seeing as the Chanhee he remembered from his cell hadn’t been very keen to show any emotions.

Juyeon was the first to dare speak up. “Well,” he said with a chuckle, glancing at Chanhee, “we hung out a few times after we got back home. This one couldn’t keep his eyes off me, but it took me almost a week to realize what it all meant. I thought he was just clingy naturally.”

“I am clingy naturally,” Chanhee said in an annoyed tone, rolling his eyes. “You’re just too dense to distinguish between normal clinginess and flirting.”

Yeonjun’s grin grew as he watched the two of them bicker and try to tell the story of their getting together from their perspective. He thought they were very cute together.

“Well, anyways, eventually he asked me if I wanted to kiss him,” Chanhee explained. “Not ‘can I kiss you’, but ‘do you want to kiss me’.”

“You were staring at my lips! That’s a normal question to ask then,” Juyeon jumped in.

“Yeah, yeah. So, I said ‘well I thought it was obvious’, then he panicked for a moment, then we kissed. And now we’re together.”

Yeonjun let out a satisfied hum. “I’m happy for you.”

Juyeon grinned happily, reaching for Chanhee’s hand to pull it towards him. Gently, he kissed the back of his boyfriend’s hand, causing Chanhee to roll his eyes, but with a very fond look on his face.

The gesture was cute, but it caused a stab of longing in Yeonjun’s chest. It must have been visible on his face, because what Juyeon next asked was, “so, how’s it been going for you? Have you been spending a lot of time with your friends you talked about?”

“Oh, yeah, I’ve been good. They’ve been helping me a lot.”

Juyeon nodded. “Good to hear. Are you having trouble with the, um, you know—”

“The werewolf thing?” Yeonjun asked, amused. Juyeon nodded bashfully, causing Yeonjun to laugh. “I’m fine to talk about it, don’t worry. I’m trying to get used to it. It was pretty freaky in the beginning, I’m not gonna lie.”

Yeonjun explained everything that had happened when he’d had to go to the hospital, as well as the whole scent blocker thing.

“I’ve gotten used to them, so I don’t even feel that it’s there any longer, but I think it’s pretty noticeable for other people. But I still don’t know how to control my scent, so it’s better to keep it on.”

“Oh, I hadn’t even thought about that,” Chanhee said, eyeing the scent blocker. “That sounds super confusing; how would you even control it? Doesn’t it just go out of your scent… glands?”

Shrugging, Yeonjun said, “I don’t really know either. I’ll have to ask Soobin about it.”

“Oh, Soobin was one of your best friends, right? I remember you mentioning him,” Juyeon said, taking a bite of the last remains of the pancake on his plate.

“Yeah, he’s my oldest friend. He’s an alpha, so I can’t really ask him about omega related stuff, but I have Beomgyu for that. He’s a new friend.”

The two hummed understandingly. The conversation shifted off Yeonjun for a while, and it was comforting to only have to listen to Juyeon and Chanhee talking about their lives for a moment. Juyeon talked about his sisters and how he was so happy that he got to play with them and take them to their ballet classes. Chanhee talked about how his song teacher had tried to scold him for slacking off on practicing for months before she realized he had literally been kidnapped. She hadn’t kept up with the news and had just assumed he was skipping his classes.

“It’s preposterous that she’d think that, though,” Chanhee huffed, “because I love my singing lessons. I’m offended that she’d think I would purposefully miss so many lessons, and without even telling her…” he shook his head, frowning.

Laughing, Yeonjun leaned forward and patted his shoulder. “I’m glad you have something you like doing that much.” He sighed, unable to keep his thoughts away from his own depressing predicament. “I haven’t been able to go back to school, and since classes have already started it’s too late to go back to teaching at my dance school too.”

Yeonjun had called his boss a few days earlier to ask about work. She had been very understanding and seemed very relieved to hear from him. Unfortunately, she had suggested he take this term off to allow himself some rest, and that they would be happy to welcome him back in the autumn. He knew she was being reasonable, but it had still felt like something had been taken from him.

“Then what have you been doing?” Chanhee asked.

Yeonjun looked around the café, watching the people that were coming in as he answered. “Not much. I’ve mostly hung out with Soobin, and the other guys. Soobin is staying at my place, so I won’t have to be alone right now.”

“Oh, that’s so nice,” Juyeon said. “I think if it was me, I also wouldn’t want to be all by myself.”

Yeonjun was lucky, really, because in the time since he’d escaped, he hadn’t even had to think about what it would feel like if he was alone, because Soobin and his friends were always there. In the few short moments he found for himself, he never felt left alone.

“Yeah, I appreciate him a lot. He’s, like, my emotional support person. He always has been.”

“Sounds like you’re close.”

Yeonjun studied the almost empty cup of coffee between his hands then as he imagined Soobin in his mind. Smiling, he said, “Yeah, we are. We’ve known each other forever.”

For a moment, he contemplated telling them about his feelings for Soobin. Since what happened on Friday, he kind of did want to have someone to rant about the whole Beomgyu-Soobin-thing that had been revealed. He just… didn’t feel like making it all about himself in that moment. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Juyeon and Chanhee, he just felt like he wanted to have friends where not everything would have to wind back to Yeonjun’s feelings for Soobin.

So, he didn’t tell them about Soobin. But one day he probably would. And screw his hopeful heart for wishing that that day would be when he and Soobin were together.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Having expected his Monday to be as dull as last week, Yeonjun found himself jumping in joy and shock when he, with one eye open as he had just woken up, found an e-mail notification from the headmaster of his school. He read it instantly, and when he realized what it said his drowsiness was gone in an instant.

“Soobin!” he yelled, jumping out of the bed and looking around the room to find the alpha. “Soobin, guess what?!” Unfortunately, his apartment stayed silent.

“Ahh, he’s in class, of course,” Yeonjun mumbled to himself, wondering how it was possible for Soobin to sneak out of bed without him waking up.

Since he couldn’t scream his delight out loud to Soobin, he opted to do so in the group chat.

Yeonjun

GUYS

I’m allowed to go back to class! The headmaster got my medical
records from my doctor and said my case was acceptable

All I have to do is talk to my teachers and make sure I catch
up with what I missed!

Kai

Hyung that’s great news!

Will you come to school today then???

Beomgyu

I knew ittt

Im happy to hear so

Soobins next to me reading the text bc apparently he’s too good of a student to pick up his own phone

Hah

Beomgyu (private chat)

He wanted to run out of class to call you but I forced him to stay

aren’t I such a good influence

Yeonjun (private chat)

I have a lot of examples for why you’re not a good influence, but I’ll give it to you this time

But stop texting in class, talk to you later

In the group chat, he answered Kai,

Yeonjun

I’ll go and talk to my professors today, and hopefully I can come to class tomorrow!!!

For the first time in a long time, it felt like, Yeonjun had somewhere he needed to go. He had purpose, at least for today.

For once, he was excited to get dressed and get ready to go out. He meticulously picked out a nice outfit, and styled his hair in his usual way.

He even forced down a sandwich after having his morning coffee – these days, he was getting better at eating breakfast, but it was solely because Soobin had taken to cooking it for him whenever they woke up together. It was with Soobin in his thoughts that he made that sandwich and ate it, thinking his best friend would definitely be proud of him.

When he arrived at school, he felt a sense of calm that hadn’t been there the last time he’d been in these halls. He had to talk to some of his professors and figure out what he could do to catch up, and then hopefully if he just put in some effort, everything would turn out alright.

Thankfully, the headmaster seemed to have alerted his professors about his condition and that he was coming to talk to them, so it all went very smoothly. They were all very understanding of his situation, so when he walked out of there, Yeonjun felt like catching up was feasible. He was advised to talk to his peers to get some help. Considering Yeonjun already had plans to study with Changbin, he felt hopeful.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

As the next day rolled in, it was perhaps the first time in his life that Yeonjun was this happy to get out of bed when their alarmed sounded in the morning. He practically jumped to his feet, excited to get dressed for something other than just staying home all day.

He got through his old routine in the bathroom, daring to turn on the light this time as he needed to see himself to know if he looked okay.

It was a little jarring, seeing his own still pretty gaunt-looking face, but since the incident with Soobin, he wasn’t feeling as panicky about his appearance any longer. He was able to see how he still looked like himself, even if there were tiny changes, his face was unchanged except for the weight loss.

After slowly getting comfortable in front of the mirror again, Yeonjun indulged in a long skin care routine before putting on a little makeup just because he was feeling it. When he finished, he walked out to get dressed, only to stop and stare at his best friend who was still fast asleep in his bed.

Soobin had pushed off the covers and had one arm slung over his face, showing off his glorious bicep muscles. His shirt had ridden up so that his stomach was showing, and Yeonjun had to force himself to look away or he would be stuck there for a while.

Forcing himself to get back into best friend mode, he moved to grab the pillow he had been using earlier and hit Soobin straight in the face with it. “Soobin-ah, get out of bed! You’re walking me to class today, so you have to get up.”

Soobin grunted and threw up both arms to protect himself from the oncoming abuse with the pillow. He tried to grab it, but Yeonjun predicted that move since he’d grown up with Soobin. He changed his tactics and started hitting Soobin’s legs with the pillow instead, which resulted in another grunt from the younger before he rolled around and started ignoring Yeonjun.

“Okay, if that’s how you’re gonna be, then fine,” Yeonjun said, stepping back and pretending to be upset. “I’ll just go all by myself to my first day back in school then.” He turned his back on Soobin but looked over his shoulder with a pout.

Hearing his whining, Soobin opened his eyes narrowly to determine whether Yeonjun was joking or not. When he noticed the dramatic pout Yeonjun was spouting, he snorted, then shook his head as if to shake the sleepiness away. He took a deep breath, preparing himself, then rolled out of bed.

“Coffee, please?” he called over his shoulder to Yeonjun while heading to the bathroom with heavy steps. Yeonjun watched him go with a grin, then jumped to his feet and ran to the kitchen.

After turning on the coffee machine, he ran into the bathroom to brush his teeth next to the alpha, barely able to keep the grin away even as his mouth was full of toothpaste. Soobin must have thought he looked either funny or cute – or both – because he looked very amused the whole time.

Breakfast was a fast ordeal, both of them eating a bowl of the cereal Yeonjun always had at home, together with their large cups of coffee. After that, Soobin seemed more alert and ready to take on the day.

Of course, Yeonjun had already prepared his outfit for the day, so the getting ready part was also rather quick and painless. He wanted to look good, but not stand out too much, so he’d opted with a sleeveless black shirt and chequered pleated pants, simple but cool. Soobin seemed to agree, considering how Yeonjun clearly noticed the alpha sneaking glimpses of his bare arms.

As a last touch, both of them changed their scent blockers to new ones to prepare for the day. For a brief moment, Yeonjun caught a whiff of Soobin’s long hidden scent, only for it to be blocked away again. It made him huff in annoyance, not at Soobin but at the universe, before he shook the thought away and joined Soobin at the door. With his bag and jacket thrown over his shoulder, keys in hand, phone in his pocket, he was ready to go.

Ready for his first day of class since becoming a werewolf.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Yeonjun didn’t know what he had expected for his return. Maybe for everyone to stare at him the whole time, or to get swarmed and asked all the uncomfortable questions he wanted to avoid. Instead, everyone he met eyes with had given him sympathetic smiles, but they seemed adamant on giving him his own space. If anything, it was a bit too kind of them, looking away from him rather than waving and talking to him like they used to do… before.

His teacher said nothing about his reappearance in the class, apparently not wanting to bring any attention his way, but she nodded his way to acknowledge she had seen him.

Without thinking, Yeonjun sat down next to Changbin, who was the only person who was genuinely happy to see him. They had met up before the class started and Changbin had filled Yeonjun in on the details they hadn’t already talked about over text. Small details that might seem inconsequential to others like how he’d spilled coffee all over his carpet that morning, or how Felix was trying to convince him that they should buy a cat, but which meant everything to Yeonjun. It was small things like this that made him feel normal again.

Maybe he had expected the worst and riled himself up, because after his first class Yeonjun was so tired that he could just lie down on the floor to sleep.

If he ignored the people around them, focusing on Changbin and their friend group that they met up with at lunch, Yeonjun could almost imagine that no time had passed at all. That he hadn’t turned into something different, something that none of his school friends could understand.

By acting normal, and following the usual routine at school, Yeonjun could pretend that he wasn’t a traumatized, broken human turned omega who barely managed to shower on his own. He could pretend that he didn’t need one of his friends (preferably Soobin) to accompany on all public transportation because he was too afraid of being drugged and abducted. 

At least, when being around these people—who didn’t know the details and just how broken Yeonjun had been—he could fool himself that he was fine.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

After school, Soobin forced Yeonjun to come with him grocery shopping, because it was ‘good for him to get exposed to people in public’, whatever that meant. It being a Tuesday, the guys had been invited over to their place to hang out later. Thus, they needed to prepare by buying all the food they could carry.

“Tell me about your day,” Soobin asked as they walked the short detour to the store.

“Well… I haven’t had time to go through Changbin’s notes, so today’s lectures kinda went right over my head. But I still took notes, so I think it’ll be fine. Hopefully.”

“And how did it feel, to be back?”

Yeonjun smiled. “It felt good. Almost like normal.” His expression turned into a scowl next. “But there were so many scents in the lecture hall, it gave me a headache.”

“Ah, yeah.” Soobin nodded thoughtfully. “With the number of people in school, there are a lot of scents mixed together. It’s definitely overwhelming.”

Yeonjun nodded, stepping closer to Soobin to let a cyclist pass them on the sidewalk. “Changbin smelled nice, though. He doesn’t smell too much, but I understand what you meant about humans now. It’s there, but very subdued.”

“Exactly,” Soobin agreed, subconsciously grabbing Yeonjun’s arm and locking it with his own as they walked. “It’s like, you would be able to distinguish it if you found an item smelling like him, but you couldn’t pick it out in a crowd.”

As he nodded, Yeonjun wondered if that was how Soobin had considered his scent when he was human. Suddenly, he wanted to ask Soobin what he thought about his scent and how it had smelled earlier, and if he liked that he smelled more now. He also wanted to know what his own scent was, because he’d learnt from Beomgyu that it was only during a heat that omegas were able to smell themselves. It was one of the things about his new omegan status that he’d been able to think about without a negative tint to his thoughts, curiosity winning over panic for once.

It just bugged him so much that he couldn’t tell what his own scent was.

He was too shy to ask Soobin about it though, still worried that Soobin didn’t find his scent appealing. It would be shameful to hear that, considering just how much he liked Soobin’s scent, even if he had only smelled it a handful of times.

When they arrived at the store, Yeonjun walked in without any concern in mind. He had gone to this store since he moved into his apartment and basically knew it like the back of his hand by now.

Once inside, a tall teenage boy squeezed his way past Yeonjun to get to the first aisle. Immediately, Yeonjun froze, as something that he quickly realized must be strong alpha pheromones hit him. His knees weakened and he felt the need to curl in on himself, as if something terrifying had just walked past him. It lasted for a moment or two and left him feeling squeamish and annoyed at his instincts.

Soobin looked just as uncomfortable when Yeonjun looked up at him, but there was also a scowl on his face. “Maybe this was a bad idea,” he mumbled, looking after the kid that had walked past them without a second thought.

“What?” Yeonjun asked.

“Do you think you can handle being in here? I’m sorry, I didn’t think about how many people must go in and out of this place all the time.”

After the mention, as if being reminded his nose was way more sensitive than he was used to, he became aware of the mass of scents in the air around him. For a moment it made him nauseous, and he forced himself to breathe through his mouth.

How pathetic was it if he couldn’t even go grocery shopping any longer?

“I’ll be fine,” he said, trying to plaster on an indifferent look on his face.

Soobin eyed him thoughtfully, but he let it go when Yeonjun started walking forward.

They already knew what they were getting, so thankfully they didn’t need to wander around forever in there. Yeonjun just stayed by Soobin’s side the whole time, and it didn’t take long for his discomfort to ebb away.

At one point, they decided to separate to make the journey faster, and so Yeonjun made his way to the cold aisles to get some meat. Further down the aisle, there was a group of people taking up his path, and the only way to get past them was to excuse himself and squeeze between them. He didn’t have a problem to do so, although he realized as he was doing it that maybe he should have just taken a detour into the next aisle.

Because the four of them – three men and one woman – were all alphas (just his luck), and they weren’t exactly holding their scents in. He also felt their eyes on him as he passed with his eyes glued to the floor. He just prayed that none of them would say anything.

Holding his breath, Yeonjun kept walking. They thankfully said nothing, but he could still feel the effect of their scents and stares on him after turning and exiting that aisle. If his reaction to one teenage alpha had been bad, this was way worse.

His heart was speeding in his chest, and he felt lightheaded… was this a primal survival instinct or something else entirely? Part of him felt like running the opposite direction of those alphas, while the other part of him wanted to drop to the floor in surrender. And the rational part of his brain didn’t know what to make out of those feelings at all.

Thankfully, since none of them did so much as look at him, he managed to force his legs forward and out of the aisle without falling victim of his instincts.

He made it to the meat disk and gave himself a moment to breathe, one hand shooting out to steady himself. His heart kept racing, and he wished he could make it stop. It didn’t help that he felt guilty for his reaction, as if he had branded those strangers as dangerous in his mind just because they smelled like alphas. They had done nothing to him, yet he was still terrified.

With barely any conscious thought, Yeonjun picked out a random package of meat and started moving towards where Soobin said he would go.

Was he imagining, or were people staring at him? He felt like every single person, werewolf or human, was looking at him as he walked past them. Maybe it was because of his rapid pace. He told himself it was because of that. What else could it be?

When he spotted Soobin, he almost ran the last couple of steps to get to his side. When he appeared at Soobin’s side, the younger flinched and let out a yelp.

“Hyung! Don’t do that, I—what happened?” When Soobin took in his appearance, he turned to face Yeonjun completely and scanned him up and down.

With Soobin close, Yeonjun’s breathing was finally evening out and his heartbeat slowing down, but he wasn’t calm just yet. Shaking his head, he said, “just a bit overwhelmed.”

Soobin was about to say something when a pair of elders walked past them. When Yeonjun met the eyes of the woman she stopped and pointed at him. “Young man, this is no place to be in your state!” She fixed her eyes onto Soobin, who went wide eyed at the hardness of her gaze. “Is this how you treat your omega? Young people these days!”

“Sorry!” Soobin said, holding his hands out in front of him. His eyes were big as he glanced at Yeonjun, looking slightly embarrassed when he turned back to the woman. “It’s not what you think, but we’re leaving now, anyways.”

She narrowed her eyes, letting out a tsking sound as she and her companion went on their way.

When they were long gone, Yeonjun raised his eyebrows at Soobin. “What was that about?”

“Let’s just get out of here,” Soobin said without explaining. He pulled on Yeonjun’s arm to get him towards the counter.

“Soobin—"

“Your eyes are glowing,” Soobin said, glancing back at Yeonjun as he manoeuvred them in the right direction.

“They are?” Yeonjun’s hand came up to his brow, as if he could sense the change of his eyes.

“Yeah. That woman, she thought… Ah, I’ll tell you later.”

Utterly confused but buying that Soobin would rather tell him when they had paid and left the place, Yeonjun let it go for the moment.

After they had paid and they were carrying their groceries to the bus, however, Soobin wouldn’t answer Yeonjun’s question.

“Maybe we should start practicing these kinds of things,” Soobin muttered, bringing out his phone. Yeonjun watched him pull up his chat with Beomgyu.

“Controlling my eyes, you mean?” he asked.

“Yeah, and getting used to strong scents. And to control your own scent. Stuff like that.”

“Mm, I agree with you. But will you tell me what that lady meant now?”

“It was nothing,” Soobin said, starting on a message to Beomgyu.

“Soobin, just tell me, why are you so stubborn?”

“Because it’s embarrassing.”

“Soobin it’s just me, what’s there to be embarrassed about?”

Soobin lifted his head and bore his eyes into Yeonjun. After a few seconds of thinking, he sighed and gave up, looking away as he explained. “She thought you were in heat, and that it was stupid of me as your alpha to bring you out in public.”

“Huh? Why would she think that?”

“The eyes, for one. And the fact that you’re wearing scent blockers, and me too. It’s not a farfetched conclusion, it’s just… embarrassing.”

Yeonjun didn’t know all there was to know about heats, but he knew enough since his lesson with Beomgyu to understand why Soobin would think it was embarrassing. Now that he understood what she had meant, he thought about her words again.

Is this how you treat our omega? She had said. Oh. She had thought they were—

It wasn’t the first time someone thought they were together, but every time it made Yeonjun a bit delighted at the thought of them looking like a pair. And that thought also came with the despair that the truth was not in fact what it looked like, and that Soobin most likely was uncomfortable at the thought of someone seeing them in that way.

“Ah, I see,” he answered Soobin, and then a slightly awkward silence settled between them.

Soobin was a bit flustered, Yeonjun could tell, but he was trying to act like he wasn’t. “I asked Beomgyu what he thought about it, maybe we should try and plan in some kind of practice sessions or whatever to get you used to it.”

“Sounds good.”

The bus arrived, and they didn’t talk about what happened at the grocery store again after that. When they got back home, Soobin texted the others and called off their hangout, to give Yeonjun some space to calm down. Then, he called Beomgyu and the three of them discussed how to go about these practice sessions that Yeonjun clearly needed. All the while they were planning for it, Yeonjun told himself to not get affected by Soobin’s words, nor the still slightly awkward tension in the air.

Don’t think about it, he told himself later when he and Soobin went to bed, and the younger for some reason was not cuddling him like he usually would do. It doesn’t mean anything.

After half an hour of worrying and hating the tension in his own body, he couldn’t take it any longer.

“Hey Soobin?”

“Hm?” the younger hummed, his eyes staying closed.

“Are you embarrassed?” Yeonjun asked, his voice sounding slightly less emotionless than he wanted it to.

“Embarrassed of what?” Soobin must have heard the slight sadness in Yeonjun’s tone, because he opened his eyes then, watching Yeonjun’s face in the darkness.

Of me, he thought, but he couldn’t say that. He bit back his words and hugged himself. “Well, you know… what the woman said at the store before.”

Soobin’s mouth opened but no sound came out. Yeonjun looked away from him, considering turning around so Soobin wouldn’t see his face.

“Why would I be embarrassed?” Soobin said, and suddenly Yeonjun felt a touch on the elbow that was facing upwards, tugging at it until he let go of himself. To his surprise, Soobin scooted closer and placed Yeonjun’s arm over his side.

Unable to fight against his need for Soobin’s comfort, Yeonjun let out a shaky breath and shifted even closer himself. “I don’t know, I thought—"

“I’m not embarrassed of you, Hyung, not in any way.”

So, Soobin saw right through Yeonjun’s walls. It wasn’t that surprising, he had known Yeonjun long enough to know about his many insecurities.

“I mean, was it embarrassing that she thought I took you out to the store when you were on your heat? Yeah. But that’s got nothing to do with you. It would have been just as embarrassing had it been Beomgyu, you know?” Soobin’s hand started running slowly up Yeonjun’s arm in a comforting manner.

“But, she- she thought we were, you know…”

“Oh.” The hand stopped moving for a second, and Yeonjun feared it would go away completely because of his words. Then, to his surprise, the hand suddenly moved upwards, until he felt Soobin’s fingers gently pushing through his hair just above his ear. “Were you uncomfortable with her assuming we were together?”

Was he uncomfortable? Hadn’t Yeonjun just insinuated he was afraid Soobin was the one who was uncomfortable with it?

“No,” he breathed out, voice turning quieter. “I don’t care what people think.”

Even in the darkness, Yeonjun could tell Soobin was smiling softly. “Good. I don’t care either.”

It was such simple words, but it still made Yeonjun’s increasing anxiety suddenly sipper out. He let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes in content. 

And if his heart jumped in his chest and butterflies occupied his stomach when Soobin’s arms effortlessly reached out and pulled Yeonjun into his chest, no one had to know that.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

After Yeonjun had started going back to class, suddenly time started speeding up. Before, each day had dragged on and he had barely known what to do with himself. Now, there was never enough time. He had so much schoolwork to catch up on, and he spent many nights holed up in the library with Changbin, going over several weeks’ worth of material.

When he wasn’t studying with Changbin, he was practicing with Beomgyu. They had planned to have their sessions thrice a week, and most of those times Yeonjun went over to Beomgyu’s place since, as Beomgyu had put it, “there are no distracting alphas around at my place”. Even though their first lesson with just the two of them had went fine, it took Yeonjun a few sessions before his discomfort lessened and he started to realize that he might actually enjoy spending time with the other omega. 

Their sessions were either theoretical, where Beomgyu would continue with his PowerPoints and explain more things he thought was crucial for Yeonjun to know, or they were practical. In the practical sessions, they had started off simple with just controlling his eyes. However, that simple task had proved harder than Yeonjun could imagine.

“I’ve never thought about how I do it, I just do it and it works,” Beomgyu had said when he struggled to explain to Yeonjun how he changed his eye colour. “Like, I can flash them if I want to,” as he had said it, his eyes had flashed a luminous blue, a second later going back to his usual warm brown colour, “but I don’t really know how. It’s, like, how you know how to walk or how to close your eyes; you just do it!”

So, it had taken a long time – and some help from his other werewolf friends, who had a little more patience for Yeonjun’s inability to do this small thing – before Yeonjun finally got a grip on it. Of course, that didn’t mean he could fully control his eyes whenever he wanted to, but the progress was enough to satisfy Beomgyu. On his own, Yeonjun continued practicing changing eye colour in front of the mirror.

Then, during the third week, Beomgyu moved onto the topic of scents. There was much to learn about them, much more than Yeonjun could ever have imagined. He found it fascinating how a person’s scent could reveal their emotions more than their facial expressions, and he was quite eager to learn how to decipher that on his own.

They practiced a lot, just the two of them, where Beomgyu would try to display different kinds of feelings to the best of his ability and had Yeonjun smelling and trying to understand what those feelings were. At first, he had struggled a lot, because contrary to his belief, understanding the emotions behind a scent had nothing to do with his sense of smell. Instead, it was as if there was an additional sense that he’d recently developed, in which some part of him could just feel what the scent was trying to tell him.

After the fourth week, Yeonjun thought he was starting to get the hang of it. They had practiced with Soobin and Taehyun a few times, and whenever he could make out the emotions they were displaying, he was damn proud of himself.

Soobin also took him out in public and helped him practice being in places with a lot of overwhelming scents. There was the gym, where the air was filled with all kinds of smells, and all of them very potent. It had made Yeonjun nauseous when he first stepped inside. Soobin had showed him how to breathe and ignore the pheromones in the air, especially the ones coming from alphas.

As the weeks passed by, February was over quicker than Yeonjun was used to. Valentine’s Day came and went, and Yeonjun chagrined himself for not remembering it. Normally, he would celebrate Valentine’s Day with Soobin, giving the excuse that it was more fun to celebrate it with your best friend than alone (considering they’d both been single most of the past Valentine’s Day). He’d only been reminded about it when faced with Beomgyu’s grand gesture for Taehyun. Beomgyu had brought cake and flowers and balloons, the latter of which he’d placed in the alpha’s locker at school. He had also written a song to the poor alpha, which he had played to their entire friend group that same night. Yeonjun had thought he’d been pretty clear who his celebrations were focused on, considering his heart eyes had been directed at Taehyun that entire day, but apparently Taehyun hadn’t caught on. The poor alpha had asked Yeonjun the next day if he thought Beomgyu was still trying to court Soobin, and when Yeonjun told him no, he’d been obviously confused about it, unable to figure out who Beomgyu was interested in.

Sometimes, Yeonjun wished these damn alphas would be a tad less oblivious.

Other than keeping up with his studies, and having multiple practice sessions with Beomgyu a week, their Tuesday hangouts became a thing once again. Even though he saw his four friends almost all the time, either in school or during the evenings, it was nice to plan a more serious outing once per week where they all had time to get together and do whatever they felt like doing.

On the Tuesday marking six weeks since Yeonjun’s escape, Yeonjun ended up having to cancel on the boys because of how behind he was on his assignments. He expected them to complain and then move on, but to his surprise, the four of them found him at the café he’d holed up in and decided to spend their evening there doing schoolwork (or in Kai and Soobin’s case, pretending to do schoolwork when they really were looking at YouTube under the table) with him.  

“Hey, Soobin-hyung, isn’t that the girl who was flirting with you a while ago?” Kai asked when he saw another girl getting behind the counter. She was probably starting her shift just now. Yeonjun immediately recognized her from that day so many months ago, when his annoyance had made him pay for Kai and Tae’s food just because he didn’t want her to continue flirting with Soobin.

“Hmmm yeah, I recognize her,” Soobin said, looking over in her direction. Instantly, Yeonjun felt a pang in his chest, and he wished he could grab Soobin’s chin and prevent him from looking at her. “I don’t think she was flirting, though. We were just talking about anime or something.”

“Do you think she’ll recognize you now that your red hair has almost faded?” Kai added, glancing sideways at Soobin’s head.

With the red having faded, Soobin’s hair was a pink-orangey colour now, with almost a centimetre of his black roots showing. Yeonjun had tried to convince Soobin to let him dye it another colour for him, but so far Soobin had been sceptical. Most likely, he didn’t like the idea of bleaching his hair again, but Yeonjun thought that he could probably sway him.

Soobin glanced at Yeonjun, who didn’t notice the attention as he was glaring in the direction of the girl. “I don’t know. Maybe I’ll get to talk to her if I order something else later.”

Schooling his expression, Yeonjun just nodded and went back to his studies. No need to show Soobin just how jealous that simple statement made him.

Half an hour later, Yeonjun’s studies were interrupted by the sudden buzzing of his phone in his pocket. He sighed as he pulled it out, assuming it was his mom that was calling, only to freeze when he saw ‘Unknown number’ written at the top.

Without reason, his heartbeat picked up. He quickly stood and told the others he would be back soon, answering the phone only when he was a few steps away from the table.  

“Hello, this is Yeonjun.”

“Hello Yeonjun, my name is Park Jiho,” a woman answered in a very formal tone. “I’m calling from the police department of Seoul. Do you have a minute.”

Yeonjun’s heart dropped and a sense of dread filled his chest. “Yes, yes, sure.” He hugged himself as he listened to the woman explaining why she was calling.

“It regards Kim Jaesung. You have a restraining order against him since about a month back, and the police is also aware of your situation and relation to Mr Kim. Do you know of whom I’m speaking of?”

The name bounced around in his head for a couple of seconds before he realized who it was she was talking about. She must mean Mr X. So that was his name, Kim Jaesung. Somehow, knowing his name didn’t humanize him. It just made him feel more fictional. Yeonjun couldn’t imagine this normal, innocent name fitting the evil scientist he remembered.

“Yes, I think I know.”

“Good,” Jiho said. “I am calling you because Mr Kim has been spotted at several locations in Seoul over the past week, most times by surveillance cameras. Because of the charges he is suspected of, we are on the lookout and doing our best to catch him. Still, it is our duty to inform you so that you can stay safe and be aware of the situation.”

Vision blurring, his hand holding the phone started shaking. Something akin to panic was clawing at his throat. “I see. Thank you so much for calling, officer.”

“If you have any concerns about your own safety and think you might need protection, don’t be shy to ask about it. It is our duty to keep you safe, so don’t think you are being a burden if that’s what you need.”

It was a wonder that Yeonjun could answer coherently. “I’ll… consider it. Was he sighted at public spaces?”

“Yes, he seems to be moving around to keep out of our reach. We will likely send out a public announcement about him soon, so you should expect that as well.”

“Okay.” He took an unsteady breath. “Again, thanks for calling.”

When the call ended, Yeonjun stood there staring out the window of the café. He had known Mr X was free and out there, but somehow in the last few weeks he had managed to push the thought of him to the back of his mind. Before, he hadn’t worried that Mr X was looking for him, but now he was. Even if they couldn’t be sure he was trying to get to him, the risk was not inexistent.

After allowing himself a minute to himself, Yeonjun heaved a deep breath and went back to the table. It fell silent almost instantly when the others noticed the look on his face.

“Hyung?” Taehyun asked. He was in the seat next to Yeonjun, and so he was the only one who could see how Yeonjun’s hands were shaking where he held them on his lap. “What’s wrong? Who was that?”

“It—it was the police.”

“The police? What did they say?”

“She, uh, she said Mr X has been spotted at several places in Seoul.” He didn’t have to say more than that, because they all already knew how he felt about Mr X even now. “She told me to stay safe and—and to tell the police if I want protection.”

It fell quiet around the table again. Yeonjun didn’t move, didn’t look up at his friends. He was just trying his best not to freak out, to not let the memories from that room filter back in. The room he was dragged to every day or so to be poked and studied by Mr X, and then sent back to his cage in pain—

Suddenly, Taehyun’s arms snaked around his waist, hugging him from the side. “Don’t worry, Hyung,” he said. “He won’t get to you. He will have to go through me, and I won’t let him.”

The words were comforting, but not enough to calm down his panicking. He smiled and tried to speak, but no words came out.

The sound of chairs scraping reached him, and then suddenly he sensed Kai and Beomgyu joining the hug. “Tae is right,” Kai said against Yeonjun’s back. “You have all four of us, and there’s no way we will let go of you again.”

Beomgyu’s comforting pheromones reached him, and Yeonjun was thankful that they had decided that the other omega should stop wearing his scent blockers to allow Yeonjun to get used to it. It was one of the only things that managed to completely calm him down when he got like this, and in that moment, he was truly grateful for Beomgyu.

“Hyung?” Kai asked, a slightly worried tone to his voice. It took Yeonjun a few seconds to realize Kai wasn’t talking to him, but to Soobin. Lifting his eyes, Yeonjun saw Soobin was still in his seat, his hands balled into fists on the table in front of him. His head was tilted downwards, as if he was intentionally hiding his face, and his chest was heaving with rapid breaths.

“Soobin-hyung?” Taehyun tried, leaning away from Yeonjun, attempting to reach for Soobin.

A sound that Yeonjun had never heard come out of Soobin’s mouth before suddenly escaped the alpha. It was deep, a sort of growling, animalistic sound that Yeonjun could almost feel the vibrations of in his chest.

He had a feeling he should probably be frightened by it, considering the way Taehyun gasped and stiffened next to him. Instead, the sound instilled a sense of protection in him, a feeling of knowing his alpha was there to keep him safe in the face of danger.

“Soobin-hyung?” Kai tried again, and when he tried approaching Soobin again the sound increased in volume.

“Stay back,” Taehyun warned, getting to his feet but approaching Soobin much more carefully. “Soobin? Can you hear me?”

Soobin wasn’t answering, but they all heard his heavy breaths and the way he was trying to hold his growls in but barely succeeding. The closer Taehyun got, the harder he seemed to clench his fists, and Yeonjun suddenly felt a sense of panic at the thought of his alpha being in pain.

Before Yeonjun could figure out what was going on, Taehyun fixed him with a thoughtful look. He seemed to be contemplating something, eyes shifting between Yeonjun and Soobin, before coming to a conclusion.

With a much more direct look, Taehyun motioned with his eyes for Yeonjun to try something. It took him only a second to figure out what Taehyun wanted him to do.

Carefully, he spoke to his best friend. “Soobin?” No response. “Soobin, can you hear me? Can you look at me?”

Somehow, despite how unreactive he’d seemed moments before, Yeonjun’s words seemed to come through. He lifted his head, and his eyes fell on him, gaze intense and fully focused on him.

Yeonjun had to hold back a surprised gasp at what he was seeing. This was the first time in years he had seen Soobin’s eyes turn red like this, and accompanied with the intense stare, it was an almost scary sight.

Almost. Because even if his head told him he should be scared, Yeonjun’s instincts just made him even calmer than before. Those eyes were looking at him not like a predator looks at their prey, but like a guardian looks at the one they are sent to protect.

“Soobin-hyung,” Taehyun cautioned, trying to catch the alpha’s attention. “Hyung, you need to calm down. Step out with me for a moment.”

Soobin didn’t seem to hear Taehyun, but when Yeonjun’s broke their eye contact to look at Taehyun, the alpha’s eyes followed his gaze.

Taehyun repeated himself, and this time Soobin seemed to hear him, but the confused tilt of his head made it clear that he was having trouble understanding.

“Soobinnie,” Yeonjun tried, and the alpha’s eyes immediately switched back to look at him. “Taehyunnie wants you to step out with him, can you do that for me?”

Another couple of heavy breaths passed before Soobin’s gaze fell. He seemed to deflate a little, and the intensity of the red in his eyes dimmed. When Soobin looked up at Taehyun, he seemed more lucid, and calm enough to let Taehyun grab him and pull him towards the exit.

When the door closed behind them, the three that were left all let out a sigh.

“What just happened?” Kai wondered, looking between Beomgyu and Yeonjun. “I’ve never seen Soobin-Hyung like that.”

“It’s… a dangerous mind space,” Beomgyu tried explaining. He was frowning deeply, and he kept glancing towards the exit where the alpha’s had disappeared. “He lost control of his inner alpha. It requires a lot of distress for that to happen.”

Yeonjun didn’t really know what any of that meant. “How does he get out of it?”

“He needs to calm down. Might need someone to pull him out of it. I’m not very well versed in Alpha Space, but I’m sure Taehyun knows what to do. He’ll probably take him home.”

Alpha Space. The term sparked Yeonjun’s memory.

During their lectures, Beomgyu had briefly mentioned the subject of Alpha and Omega Space to him before. Since it was apparently not very common nowadays, Beomgyu had decided to skip over it and focus on the more important stuff for now. Yeonjun wished they’d chosen differently; he hated not understanding what was happening to Soobin.

“Hyung,” Beomgyu said when Yeonjun seemed to get stuck inside his thoughts. When Yeonjun met his eyes, he continued, “there’s nothing to worry about. Tae will get everything under control.”

Absentmindedly, Yeonjun nodded.

A few minutes later, Taehyun sent a text in the group chat, confirming Beomgyu’s words.

Taehyun

Soobin-hyung needs some time, so I’m taking him home

It’s all fine, though, don’t worry

“See, I told you,” Beomgyu said as he went back to his own seat and went back to whatever he was reading on his computer.

Yeonjun couldn’t focus on his schoolwork after that, though. He couldn’t help thinking about the fact that Soobin had been so riled up, so mad at the thought of Mr X being out to get Yeonjun that he’d entered this… Alpha Space. The way he’d been growling, and the way Taehyun had ordered them all to stand back spoke of the state Soobin was in. The way Soobin had listened to him and only him when in that state told Yeonjun that Soobin was prepared to do anything to protect him.

It was insatiably hot, for some weird reason, to think of Soobin in such a protective role. In another setting, that growling could do a good deal on him, if he was being honest. At the same time, it was very comforting. His mind was a conflicting mess of flustered thoughts and the content feeling of being protected.

Without saying a word, Soobin had managed to instil a sense of protection and safety in Yeonjun that he never would have been able to reach on his own.

Yeonjun gave it another half an hour before he realized he wasn’t going to get any more work done that evening. Shutting his computer, he let out a long sigh.

“I think I’ll head home,” he told Kai and Beomgyu, checking his phone for the time. It was past 8; earlier than he had planned to go home, but it would have to do.

“Um,” Beomgyu spoke when Yeonjun was gathering his stuff and stood from his seat. “Maybe you should call Taehyun before you do that, just to make sure it’s… you know, safe.”

“Safe?” Yeonjun questioned, exasperated.

Beomgyu glanced at Kai with wide eyes, looking a bit uncomfortable to have Yeonjun scowling at him. “Well, you know, Soobin is—”

“Soobin’s not gonna hurt me,” Yeonjun interrupted. He thought about how Soobin’s growl hadn’t scared him even the slightest and knew that it was true. There was no way that Soobin, under any circumstance, would lose his control so much that he’d do anything to hurt Yeonjun. Or anyone else, for that matter.

“Still, isn’t it better to make sure?” Beomgyu said.

Yeonjun just shook his head. He didn’t feel like arguing with Beomgyu about this. While he could see where Beomgyu was coming from, he knew Soobin better, and he was not scared of him.

“Kai-ah, will you tell Beomgyu I’ll be completely safe in Soobin’s hands?” Yeonjun raised his eyebrows at his friend, nodding his head once towards Beomgyu. Kai met his eyes and nodded after a second, seeing the determination in Yeonjun’s eyes. “Thanks. I’ll text you guys later.”

The bus ride back home was short, and he spent it wrapped up in thoughts about Soobin. That was not an uncommon occurrence, however for the first time in a long while, he was unsure what he was going to say to his best friend when he saw him at home. What if Soobin was still in that mind space, should he just try to give him some space? Could he help him calm down somehow?

Although he had basically told Beomgyu there was no need for it, he sent a text asking Taehyun for an update. When Tae said Soobin was doing better, Yeonjun declared that he was on his way home, leaving no room for Taehyun to advise him not to come home yet.

Taehyun was still there when Yeonjun stepped inside his apartment. He was sitting on the couch scrolling on his phone when Yeonjun entered. Soobin was nowhere to be seen.

“Hey,” Tae greeted him with an unenthusiastic wave before pointing over to the bathroom. “I told Soobin-hyung you were coming home, so he locked himself in the bathroom.”

“What? Why?” Yeonjun stepped inside the room, putting his bag down in its usual spot next to his desk. “Is he still in that mind space?”

“I didn’t think so, but I think he is worried he’s gonna hurt you in case he’s not completely out of it yet.”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes, not specifically at Taehyun but at the whole situation. Why did everyone think so little of Soobin? Soobin didn’t even trust himself?

“Okay, you can head home now if you want,” he said, pointing his thumb over his shoulder as he went over to his wardrobe, feeling like changing into something more comfortable.

Taehyun followed Yeonjun’s suggestion, but he stopped by the door, hand on the handle to ask, “you sure you’ll be okay?”

“Yes,” Yeonjun said with a low chuckle, pulling a hoodie over his head. “I’ll get that dummy to come out of there, and it’ll all be fine.”

“Okay.” Taehyun nodded. “Call me if you need anything.”

“I will,” Yeonjun agreed, waving as his friend finally left the apartment.

Yeonjun realized the hoodie he had changed into was one of Soobin’s by the faint scent reaching him. He smiled in satisfaction, making his way over to the bathroom door. There, he stopped to lean his face close to it, trying to hear anything from the other side.

“Binnie?” He swore he could hear Soobin’s breathing but nothing else, so he continued. “What are you doing in there? Can you come out?” After another five seconds with no answer, Yeonjun let out a sigh. “Soobin, you know as well as I do that you’re not a threat to me, or anyone else for that matter. Besides, do you think I can’t defend myself? You know I’d take you in a wrestling match.”

“Hyung,” he heard Soobin whine, sounding not entirely unamused.

“What? It’s true and you know it.”

Soobin let out a soft laugh, and Yeonjun could tell he was calming down. “The last time we did anything like that was years ago. I’m stronger now.”

“Yeah? Come out and prove it to me then.” Another groan from Soobin. “But seriously,” Yeonjun said, his voice changing from teasing to pleading, “please come out now, Binnie.”

Apparently, that was what it took to get Soobin to finally come out. He looked like a dog with his tail between his legs, head hanging low and his eyes avoiding Yeonjun’s.

“There you are,” Yeonjun said, grinning. He ignored Soobin’s uncomfortable look and immediately moved to hug him, feeling like he needed the comfort. He hadn’t completely forgotten the phone call and the dread it had left him with and being in Soobin’s arms helped calm him.

Soobin’s arm shot out to stop him. “Wait.”

“Soobin,” Yeonjun rolled his eyes at him, about to protest that he was being silly, but then Soobin lifted his gaze. His eyes were still red.

He clearly wasn’t in Alpha space any longer, though, so surely, he was just having trouble calming all the way back down.

“I’m not afraid of you,” Yeonjun said, looking Soobin straight in the eye. The longer he looked into those red eyes, the more his fascination grew. He had never had the chance to study Soobin so closely when he got like this, so he was going to grab his chance now that he had it.

Careful not to startle Soobin, he grabbed the alpha’s wrist and pulled him towards the couch. Soobin let out a protesting grunt but let himself get dragged along all the same.

“Big stupid alpha,” Yeonjun teased, laughing when Soobin’s mouth formed a pout. He’d noticed in the last few weeks that calling Soobin ‘alpha’ always got a certain flustered reaction out of Soobin, and he had started utilizing it to his own amusement.

It didn’t seem to help Soobin calm down, though. Instead, it had him gulping and clenching his fists on top of his knees.

“You know,” Yeonjun said, as he couldn’t help himself from putting a finger under Soobin’s chin and moving his head so he would face him, “your eyes are normally really pretty, but there’s something special about them when they are red.”

That only seemed to fluster Soobin more. “W-what?”

“Have you seen yourself with red eyes? You look like a hot vampire or something.”

Maybe Yeonjun should dial down a little, to prevent the flirting to come off as too genuine and make Soobin catch on, but it was hard when he was looking this hot (and when they were sitting this close).

“It’s not a good thing,” Soobin said, voice strained. He was staring straight at Yeonjun, eyes intense while the rest of his body was stiff. Yeonjun tilted his head in confusion, driving Soobin to continue. “When I’m like this, it’s not a good thing. Even if you think they’re… pretty.”

The vulnerability in Soobin’s voice made Yeonjun ignore the embarrassment, because it didn’t seem like Soobin cared too much about being complimented.

“When you’re… like this?”

“Like… unstable.”

Yeonjun caught Soobin’s eyes flickering down to his neck. The look in them was almost hungry, and Yeonjun swallowed thickly by instinct. That only seemed to make it worse, though, as Soobin followed the movement with hungry eyes.

Before Yeonjun had the mind to ask what unstable meant, a hand shot out and attached itself to the side of his neck. He jolted in surprise, but didn’t have much mind to react when he realized Soobin was pawing at the scent blocking patch on his neck.

“Miss your scent,” Soobin mumbled, nails dragging against Yeonjun’s skin a little, just at the area around the patch. It both tickled and sent a shiver down his spine.

“You do?” Soobin hadn’t spoken much about his scent, and Yeonjun had to grab his chance when he had it. “What… what do you think about it?”

“I love your scent,” Soobin mumbled, eyes hooded and still focused Yeonjun’s neck, “smells like… home.”

As much as Yeonjun was frustrated to not get a description of what his scent smelled like, he absolutely melted at Soobin’s words. Part of him wanted to rip his blocker off so that Soobin could get a full whiff of his scent (Soobin was already halfway there anyways), but then he took a better look at Soobin’s face and realized it was a bad time. With eyes still blaring red and a flustered face, he was clearly still affected from earlier, and Yeonjun knew Soobin hated being out of control like this. He’d much prefer to talk to Soobin about his scent and see how it affected him when he was in right mind.

“Ah, that’s so sweet, Bin-ah,” he said with a smile as he gently put his own hand on top of Soobin’s and stopped his movement. The sudden touch seemed to startle Soobin, and when Yeonjun removed the hand to hold it gently in his lap, his eyes widened as awareness trickled back in.

His head flicked to the side, facing away from Yeonjun as he flushed red in shame.

“Sorry,” Soobin said, trying to pull his hand out of Yeonjun’s grip.

Yeonjun refused to let him, though. He squeezed Soobin’s hand, placing his other hand on top to encase it in both of his. “Don’t be,” he said, rubbing the skin on the back of Soobin’s hand comfortingly.

Soobin shook his head, refusing to meet Yeonjun’s eye. “No, I… I don’t know what got over me. I’m sorry for—”

“For saying you like my scent? What, you don’t like it?”

Head snapping to the right to gape at Yeonjun, Soobin hurried to say, “What? No, that’s not what I—”

“Then what are you apologizing for?” Yeonjun smiled, unable to not tease Soobin.

“It must’ve made you uncomfortable, and with how I acted back at the café too…”

“You didn’t,” Yeonjun said firmly. “You really didn’t. If anything, you made me feel safe.”

Surprise painted Soobin’s face. “Really?”

Yeonjun could see the red trickle out, until Soobin’s eyes reclaimed their normal, warm brown colour. Nodding, Yeonjun smiled fondly. “It’s nice to know you’re here to protect me.”

The words took Soobin some time to process, but when the understanding settled, his entire body relaxed, and he finally smiled again. “Of course.”

Yeonjun opened one arm, and Soobin settled into his embrace easily. They sat like that, hugging and enjoying the warmth of each other’s company until Yeonjun’s stomach made a grumbling sound.

Chuckling, Soobin asked, “You want to eat something?”

Despite how his stomach was howling, Yeonjun’s appetite was on the low ever since that phone call. He shook his head. “Not really. Will you cuddle me until I fall asleep?”

Soobin followed Yeonjun to bed without a complaint. The clock was only 9 pm, much earlier than any of them would’ve gone to bed normally. Still, they had no problem to sink into sleepiness as they got under the covers together.

Unlike most nights—when it would take one (or both) of them to fall asleep before they ended up wrapped around each other—Soobin didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around Yeonjun the first thing he did.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

Experiencing Alpha space for the first time in his life had been extremely weird for Soobin. Both mentally and physically. It was like having your brain shut off, thoughts muffled a thousand times worse than how it felt to be drunk, and a sort of animalistic instinct he didn’t even know he had in him being the only thing keeping him functional.

He felt off for days after. Jittery, almost. More than anything else, he was mortified and embarrassed by the way he’d been acting, the way he’d completely lost control over himself.

At least he hadn’t said anything incriminating in Yeonjun’s presence. In Taehyun’s presence, sure, but that didn’t matter much. Not anymore, at least. Taehyun knew his secret now, and it was kind of liberating to be able to talk to him freely about his feelings, finally.

He barely even remembered what he’d been saying, probably mostly a lot of babbling about needing to protect his omega. Judging by Taehyun’s face at the end of it, though, he’d probably been a little too loose lipped, one way or the other.

He had growled at Taehyun a lot, that he remembered. When they’d entered the apartment—Yeonjun’s apartment—his instincts had nearly gone berserk, because it felt like he was inviting another alpha into Yeonjun’s nest. Which was ridiculous, because Yeonjun didn’t have a nest. And Taehyun was his best friend, who had been in that apartment countless of times before.

But rationality had escaped him, and he’d seen red. In that moment, he was grateful for Taehyun’s strong arms that he used to hold Soobin back until he calmed down.

Soobin honestly didn’t know what Taehyun did that helped him inch his way out of that mindset. He’d been growling one moment and laying splayed out on the couch with Yeonjun’s pillow in his face, babbling about his omega while breathing in his scent.

The whole thing was such a surreal experience, he could almost convince himself he’d dreamt it all. If only Yeonjun hadn’t shown up and called him a dummy for hiding away in the bathroom. He was pretty sure that if it was a dream, that wouldn’t have happened.

Every time he thought back to what happened next, he cringed so bad that he had to close his eyes and force the memory away. Had he really said that part about loving Yeonjun’s scent? Gosh, how obvious could he be?

Soobin was terrified that Yeonjun had figured it out after that. His anxiety had been through the roof from the moment he woke up and throughout the entire day, just waiting for Yeonjun to pull away from him. But Yeonjun acted just the same as always, albeit perhaps a bit shaken up by the news from the police. Either he didn’t know, or he didn’t care. Soobin was terrified to know which.

After one day, it got better. He started feeling more like himself, and could put his focus back on making sure that Yeonjun was doing okay. Because Yeonjun was so incredibly good at saying he was okay, when he was clearly not.

On Friday after the alpha space incident, Soobin had planned to take Yeonjun out to do something fun. He’d managed to invite Kai too, having hoped that he would be a calming presence for Yeonjun. Because even if neither of them had ever said so, Soobin knew that Yeonjun and Kai used to bond over being the two humans in their group, in a similar way that Soobin and Taehyun leaned on each other a lot. Hopefully, Kai being there would help calming both of them after this week they’d had.

Only, his plans were disrupted when his mom called him after class, practically begging him to come visit them that same evening.

“Soobin-ah, you haven’t been home at all lately. We miss you. Won’t you come spend some time with us?”

Soobin hadn’t reflected on how much time he spent at Yeonjun’s place until that moment. When was the last time he slept at home and not with Yeonjun?

Walking down the corridor, he pursed his mouth thoughtfully. He talked to his parents regularly, so it hadn’t dawned on him that they missed him or saw him sleeping at Yeonjun’s place as odd. Which, they probably didn’t, because he was sure they knew exactly why he was doing it.

“How about dinner tonight?” she asked, insisting.

“I—” Soobin didn’t know what to say. He already had plans, but at the same time… he hadn’t seen his mom in weeks. Weeks. Meanwhile, he lived with Yeonjun and saw Kai nearly every day.

He caved very fast.

“I could come by after school?”

“Really?” His mom’s tone instantly lightened, and something in Soobin’s chest lightened, as if relief settled in. “And you’ll stay overnight? I want to see my baby for more than a few hours, you know.”

Soobin couldn’t help but laugh a little. “Sure, I’ll stay. Will you cook something nice for me then?”

She promised to make so much food that he wouldn’t want to leave, and Soobin realized just then how much he had missed his mom’s food. And her presence. When was even the last time he slept at home? He had practically moved in with Yeonjun at this point, even if neither of them had officially said it.

Though, the thought of officially living with Yeonjun made him blush violently. Like, he knew the situation they were in right now was merely two best friends sharing a flat—mostly because Soobin had been too nervous to leave Yeonjun alone since he had been kidnapped—and even if it was mostly like that, it sometimes felt like more than that. More domestic than just two friends sharing a space.

They shared a bed, for one, and more often than not they ended up cuddling during the night. They cooked together (or Soobin would cook and Yeonjun would hang around the kitchen, trying to be helpful) and eat together before leaving for school together. Normal friends would get tired of each other when spending that much time together, wouldn’t they?

Maybe it was just his wishful thinking, believing that what was going on between them was anything more than just simple best friend behaviour. Because if he was honest with himself, he and Yeonjun had always been that close. It hadn’t changed much recently; it hadn’t even changed much since Soobin had realized his own feelings. The only difference was that they saw each other more often than before.

It was the sound of Yeonjun calling his name that pulled him out of his spiralling thoughts. He looked around, and saw Yeonjun jogging the last few steps, backpack slung over one shoulder. Looking like a dream with his hair laying styled, parted across his forehead, barefaced and so pretty Soobin’s heart made a flip in his chest.

Yeonjun was smiling at him, the same way he always did when they were reunited for the day. It was so incredibly easy going, and they fell into step with each other without having to say a word, heading back home together. And with every step, every glance over at Yeonjun as he rambled about his day and made sure to tell Soobin every little detail because he wanted Soobin to know everything, Soobin felt the affection grow in his chest.

And right then, he couldn’t help but think that, even if he was fooling himself with delusional thoughts about what direction their relationship was going sometimes, he didn’t really have anything to complain about.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The moment Kai stepped inside the apartment, Yeonjun pouted at him.

“Soobin is ditching us,” he whined, making the most unsatisfied face he could muster in case Soobin might be looking.

It was Friday, and the three of them had plans to hang out after school, until Soobin had informed him on the way home that he wasn’t going to make it tonight.

“Ditching us? For who, Soobin-hyung?” Kai asked, making a mock-angry face at Soobin when they walked over to the kitchen area where the alpha was standing looking into the fridge.

Yeonjun plopped down in his previous seat by the kitchen table, waiting for Soobin to bring him the soda he’d promised.

The last couple of days had been weird mentally for Yeonjun. For Soobin too, he could tell. Tuesday had been rough after that phone call, and he’d felt weirdly detached and anxious from time to time.

It was weird, the way the mind worked. He wasn’t walking around thinking about Mr X all the time or worrying where he might be, if he might be lurking around every corner. He felt safe around his friends. And when the police had sent out a national announcement about Mr X to inform the public, that had instilled another level of safety in him.

It was just… he still had this inherent sense of wrongness that he couldn’t shake. He was incapable of relaxing, constantly searching for distractions. Like going out for dinner and games on Friday night with two of his best friends.

Or one of them, apparently.

“Ugh,” Soobin grunted, leaning back so he was visible behind the fridge door only so he could roll his eyes at Yeonjun’s antics. “I told you I was sorry, hyung.” He looked at Kai as he continued his explanation. “My mom wants me to come and visit, because I haven’t been home in too long. You guys see me every day anyways.”

“Yeah, but we planned to go to the arcade and play our favourite game,” Yeonjun whined. “It’s been so long; I was looking forward to beating your ass.”

They all knew it was Yeonjun who was bound to get his ass beaten when it came to games, but thankfully Soobin didn’t comment on it. Soobin closed the fridge, soda bottle in hand, and stuck out his tongue.

“There will be plenty of time to do that another time,” Soobin said with a wiggle of his eyebrows as he poured Yeonjun a glass.

Yeonjun rolled his eyes. Technically, that was true, but he was in the mood for teasing. “Won’t there be plenty of time to see your parents too, then?”

Soobin snorted. “Tell that to my mom, who I haven’t seen in weeks.”

They argued teasingly back and forth for a while, Kai watching them in amusement.

“You know, you can always come with me,” Soobin finished with matter of factly. “You too, Kai, of course.”

Yeonjun contemplated it. He kind of wanted to, because separating himself from Soobin nowadays made him a bit anxious. He also would’ve loved to see Soobin’s parents again. If only they didn’t have a reservation at the arcade. “Maybe next time,” he ended up saying. “Are you staying the night there?”

Soobin’s expression turned guilty. “Yes, probably. Will that be okay?”

Yeonjun glanced at Kai. He hadn’t slept alone at his apartment in quite some time now, and even though he felt much better mentally, he didn’t know what kind of reaction being left alone would cause.

Still, he didn’t want them to think he was still weak like that. “I’ll be fine,” he said. Worst case, he could ask if Kai wanted to sleep over with him. It would be okay in the end, somehow.

Soobin looked at him for a couple of seconds, perhaps deciding whether to trust him or not. He glanced at the clock on the wall, then, and sighed. “I think I have to go now, if I want to join them for dinner.”

Yeonjun smiled. “Say hi to your parents from me,” he said, reaching out to pat Soobin on the butt before he left to put his shoes on.

“I will. Have fun tonight.”

They watched as Soobin buttoned up his jacket and exited. Yeonjun waited for the door to shut, before turning to Kai. “Wanna help me choose an outfit for tonight?”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Standing outside the front door to his parents’ house, Soobin froze with his hand in the air, realizing he was about to knock, as if this was a stranger’s home and not his own.

What the hell?

That was strange. He shook his head, frowning as he went to open the door and let himself in like he usually did—used to do, at least, when he was living here.

When he was living there? Was he not living there anymore? He hadn’t really thought about it, had only been focused on staying where Yeonjun was, so he hadn’t noticed how his idea of home had shifted. Now that he did think about it though, he realized how true it was.

Coming home was to come home to Yeonjun, finding him sprawled out on the couch with his phone in hand, or sitting by the kitchen table, pretending to be studying when he was nodding his head in tune with the song playing all around the apartment. If Soobin was lucky, and Yeonjun hadn’t noticed him coming in, he might even catch him doing some dance moves if the song gave him the right feeling.

He was surprised how easy it was to accept that he didn’t view his parents’ house as home anymore. He had basically moved out months ago, anyways, just not officially. Maybe he should talk to his parents about that, though, to make sure they were all on the same grounds here.

Inside the house it was warm, and the familiar smell instilled a sense of calm in him instantly. He took his shoes and jacket off, hanging it on his usual spot, before stepping into the living room.

His parents clearly hadn’t noticed his arrival. He could tell from the sound and the smell that they were occupied in the kitchen, so that was where he went.

Once in the doorway to the kitchen, he stopped to take in the scene before him for a moment. His mom was by the stove, stirring something in a pan, while his dad was by the counter chopping vegetables. Both had their backs facing him, but they didn’t need to see him to realize he was there.

He had removed his scent blockers on the way over, knowing his mom would whine if she didn’t get the chance to scent him a little after being away from each other for so long.

With a fond smile on his lips, he waited patiently for them to smell him. It only took a couple of seconds, his scent likely billowing over to them in response to recently have been released from the blockers.

His mom seemed to realize first, freezing as she took a couple of quick sniffs before dropping the spatula in the pan and turning around.

“I’m home,” Soobin said, grinning.

“Hi honey.” His mom was quick to wipe her hands on her apron before rushing over to give him a big hug. He smiled, returning the hug immediately. Instinctively, he leaned down and pushed his nose into her shoulder, breathing in her comforting scent.

“It’s been a while, Soobin,” his dad said, having come up behind his wife, waiting for them to finish. When they released each other, he too went to hug his son. It was strange, getting such a warm welcome by his dad when the last time they had spoken, Soobin had run out of a lunch date where his dad had tried to set him up with an omega. At least it seemed like his dad wasn’t holding that against him, even if Soobin was still a bit annoyed about it.

“I know,” Soobin said. “I’m sorry.”

“As long as you won’t be a stranger no more, we’re fine with you staying wherever you want,” said his mom as she rushed back to her place by the stove, making sure nothing was burning. “How is Yeonjun holding up? I haven’t spoken to him for some time now.”

Soobin went to sit on the bar chair by the kitchen island, knowing they would tell him if they wanted his help with the food. The mention of Yeonjun had, as always, a smile quickly spreading on his lips. “He’s doing better. Much better. I mean, he has his ups and downs, but these last few weeks I think he’s settled into it much more. We’ve been practicing a lot too, and he is learning super fast.”

“Good to hear, honey. I see you’re not wearing blockers anymore, that seems like a good sign.”

“Ah.” Self-consciously, Soobin put his palm against the scent gland on his neck. It felt almost raw, going without the blocker now, since he’d gotten so used to wearing them all the time.

If he was being honest, he didn’t think Yeonjun needed them to wear the blockers anymore. As he’d said, Yeonjun had been practicing a lot, and Soobin was pretty sure he had acclimatized himself to scents quite well. It was just… now that Beomgyu was teaching Yeonjun how to distinguish emotions and sense pheromones, he was afraid that Yeonjun would take one sniff of him and realize just how smitten he was. Or how easily his body… reacted to mostly anything Yeonjun did.

Before living together, getting turned on by Yeonjun wasn’t such a big problem. He’d been attracted by him for quite some time, even before figuring stuff out about his feelings, but he could get away with jerking off at random times without Yeonjun picking anything up back then.

Now, it was a constant fear of his that Yeonjun would catch him popping a boner at a completely non-sexy moment just because Yeonjun’s scent spiked or because Yeonjun had accidentally called Soobin ‘alpha’.

“Um,” he bit his lip, remembering to answer his mom, “actually, we’re still wearing them, I just took them off on the way here. The-the plan is to acclimatize Hyung slowly, so Beomgyu is going without the blockers most often now.”

“I see. Is Yeonjun wearing them as well? Or does he have control over his scent now?”

“No, no, he’s still wearing them. It’s not as easy for him to learn as we thought, so it’s taking some time.”

His parents both hummed, and Soobin briefly wondered if they were disagreeing with their methods. As a nurse, his mom surely knew more about the body than them. Maybe he should have gone to her for advice. She wasn’t saying anything about it, though, so hopefully their approach hadn’t been too disastrous.

Soobin didn’t feel like thinking (and definitely not talking) about it anymore, so he offered to set the table while they were cooking.

When the food was ready, maybe half an hour later, they sat in their usual places around the table. It all felt very familiar, and almost nostalgic; Soobin hadn’t realized how much he had missed this until now.  

Funnily enough, part of him was already missing Yeonjun. He couldn’t help wondering what he and Kai were up to, and if it wasn’t for his dad starting up a conversation, he would probably have pulled out his phone to send him a text. It was a bit much, knowing he’d been in Yeonjun’s company less than two hours ago, but he guessed being in love did that to you. Or maybe he was just more possessive and obsessed with his omega than the average.

Shit. There he went, calling Yeonjun his omega in his mind. Not good. If he kept doing that, he would fool himself into thinking it was real. And if that happened, who knew when he would accidentally slip up in conversation?

He tried to focus on his parents and not Yeonjun, for once. It was nice to be home, after all.

At first, their conversation was light. Easy. Catching up on what had been going on the last few weeks. Soobin talked about school and what classes he was taking. His parents talked about the news and some drama the neighbours had been stirring up lately.

It was all nice and cosy, until his dad had to go and ruin it.

“Soobin-ah,” he said, putting his utensils down, “we need to talk about your non-compliance with our attempts of finding your future mate. Especially how you ran out on the lunch date with Gahyun.”

Soobin, having been mid bite, coughed and nearly choked on his food. “W-what?” He coughed a little before managing to swallow the bite. “You mean the lunch date you tricked me into joining? Without telling me it was a setup with an omega I didn’t even know? You’re surprised I ran out of that lunch date?”

A frown formed on his dad’s face; he never liked it when Soobin talked back like that. “If only you’d kept your word and searched for a potential mate on your own, I wouldn’t have had to trick you into meeting with her—”

“When did I tell you I’d be searching for a mate on my own?” Soobin’s hands formed into fists, still holding onto his utensils on both sides of his plate. He stared his dad down, anger rising against his will. He didn’t want to lose his cool, but maybe it was time to tell his dad off once and for all. “I’m pretty sure I told you that if I’m gonna mate someone, I wanted to find them on my own terms, in my own time. I did not say that I was going to go look for one.”

His dad’s gaze turned stern. “Soobin-ah, you do not know—”

“And besides,” Soobin raised his voice, interrupting his dad harshly, “you know very well that I left that lunch because Yeonjun needed me. He ended up in the hospital overnight, for god’s sake!”

“Of course I know that,” his dad answered in a calmer tone than Soobin, but it was obvious that he was getting more agitated by the second too. “I—we just want the best for you.” He looked over at his wife as if searching for some common ground.

“If you think trying to make me fall for any omega you see fit then you really don’t know what the best for me is,” Soobin snapped, leaning back in his seat with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Honey,” his mom suddenly spoke up, startling Soobin so much his eyes widened as he looked over at her. He hadn’t expected her to join, and he definitely didn’t think she would be on his dad’s side, which her tone seemed to indicate. “If you don’t agree with our methods, or if this truly is something you don’t want, please tell us what it is that you want. Do you not want to end up mated?”

There was a certain look in her eye, as if she was trying to tell him something, trying to make him understand the hidden meaning behind her words. For five long seconds, Soobin felt only defeated. Usually, his mom was on his side, telling him he didn’t have to go along with anything his dad said if he didn’t want it. He can always find his own way, she used to say.

His own way.

Tell us what it is that you want.

Realization hit him. He knew exactly what she was trying to do.

He leaned his head forward, looking at his lap as he gathered some courage to speak his heart to them for the first time.

“Do you want to know why I don’t want you to find a potential mate for me?” he said slowly, ears perked up, listening for any reaction from his dad’s side. Nothing came, though, prompting Soobin to grit his teeth together and look over as he prepared to say the next words. “It’s because I already know who I want to mate. And frankly, if it’s not him, I don’t want to even consider mating anyone else.”

What felt like a heavy silence to Soobin settled between them all. He had just let his secret out, and even if he hadn’t said Yeonjun’s name, he basically had revealed everything already.

In the silence, Soobin just stared at both of his parents, awaiting their reaction. But it seemed they were digesting his words, and taking so long time doing that that Soobin was starting to get anxious. He retreated his gaze, trying to come up with what to say to diffuse the sudden tension.

A hand landed on top of his, where he was still holding his knife in his fist on top of the table. He looked up, meeting the eyes of his mom, who was leaning over the table to reach him. “Thank you, honey. For being honest with us.”

“Soobin.”

Soobin’s head snapped to the side. His dad’s face was still unreadable, and so was the tone he was speaking in. It forced a sudden panicked response out of Soobin, as he rushed to explain himself.

“I—I’m in love with him, dad! I—I know it’s unconventional and maybe not what you were expecting for my future but I just… I love him so much that I don’t know what to do, all I know is I’d rather die than mate with someone that isn’t him.”

He had been speaking so fast that he had to heave for a breath afterwards.

He’d been so caught in his panicking, everything-is-going-to-shit-mode that when his dad suddenly cracked a smile, he felt instantly flabbergasted.

“Finally, you said it, huh?”

Soobin blinked stupidly. “W-what?”

“Lik your mom said,” his dad continued, explaining himself, “thank you for telling us. We’ve had our suspicions for some time, but since you never confirmed it, I assumed we were wrong.”

“What… what do you mean suspicions?”

 His mom let out a chuckle. “We noticed how much Yeonjun’s disappearance affected you, but it wasn’t until you left home to sleep at his empty place that we realized just how much he meant to you.”

Ah. They’d seen right through him immediately, hadn’t they? Of course they knew who he was talking about the moment he said those words earlier.

“But you couldn’t have known I was in love with him,” Soobin tried, though there really was no use to try and defend himself. They already knew.

“We didn’t,” his dad answered, “and that is why I wanted to introduce you to other potential partners.”

“But…” Soobin shook his head, a bit shocked by this revelation. “I… I—”

“Honey.” The hand on top of his moved to pry the knife out of his grip, helping him to relax a little. “You know we love Yeonjun-ah. We are not judging you. Not at all. This is lovely news.”

He nodded stiffly, letting the words sink in.

There was one thing he needed to say, he realized, to make sure that they knew everything.

“It’s just…” he looked up, meeting their eyes. “I love him. I—I think I’ve been in love with him for a while.”

His mom nodded, opening her mouth to say something, but he interrupted her.

“I just—” he sucked in a deep breath. “I know it’s tradition for an alpha to mate with an omega, and that Hyung is an omega now but… I don’t want you to think that that’s the reason why I want him. Why I love him. I want him because he’s Yeonjun-hyung, and if he hadn’t become an omega, I wouldn’t give a fuck about mating. I would still want to be with him.”

That felt good to say. It had been on his mind for the last few months, ever since realizing what had been done to Yeonjun in that research facility.

Watching his dad’s face for a reaction, Soobin was struck with one more thing to say. “Actually, I think it’s disrespectful of you to tell me to find an omega to mate just because you think that’s what an alpha should do. That’s an old-school way of thinking. I just want to be happy, and I will be happy with him.”

Mic drop, he thought to himself, unable to keep a tiny smirk off his face.

“We understand,” his mom said. Do you? Soobin looked at her, trying to read her expression. She looked nothing but kind, but that was always how she looked at him. He realized that he had never doubted that she would be understanding when it came to this part of him—it had always been his dad’s reaction he had feared, and that’s what kept him from telling them the truth from the very beginning.

Slowly, he turned his gaze to look at his dad, taking a deep, stealthing breath as he waited for his response.

“I’m sorry, Soobin-ah. I… I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just wanted you to have the best future lined up for you. I realize now that I should’ve put more time into understanding why you were resisting my approach instead of pushing pack all the time.” The look on his face was one Soobin didn’t know if he had ever seen on his dad. Shame. “Will you forgive me?”

“If you promise to let it go and not ask me about mating again, then sure.”

“But Soobin!” his mom protested. “If you are going to court Yeonjun, we want to hear how it’s going!”

Soobin sputtered. “Court him? Isn’t that a bit… hasty?”

“Why would it be?” she said, smiling. “If you’re sure about your decision, I think it’s a great idea to start thinking about courting.”

“Oh.” Soobin scratched at the back of his neck. He was more than sure. The more he thought about it these last few weeks, the more sure he’d become.

The thought of placing a mating bite on Yeonjun’s pretty neck always made his insides turn into hot, burning goo.

“Courting is about showing your interest, to make him aware that you’re a possible choice for a mate,” his mom continued.

“I don’t think he likes me back, though,” Soobin mumbled, suddenly feeling shy for bringing it up.

“That’s what courting is all about. You show your interest to get him to like you.”

Soobin let out a snort. It’s not as simple as that.

He wanted to argue, to say that courting was supposed to be something serious, not just a little light flirting to show off your interest. What if Soobin asked for permission to court him, and Yeonjun was disgusted by his approaches? Not to mention, if he realized just how much Soobin was thirsting over him on the daily? If Yeonjun turned him down, he’d be absolutely crushed.

He didn’t dare voicing that to his parents, though. He knew they would just say the exact same thing as everyone else said. ‘How do you know how he feels if you’ve never asked?’ or ‘he deserves to know how you feel’. Stuff like that. Which, Soobin wasn’t stupid. He knew, reasonably, that confessing and all that shit was the best way to go, in the end. Everyone knew that, deep down. That didn’t mean it was easy, or that Soobin would ever gather the courage to do so.

Soobin’s mom didn’t seem to notice his inner turmoil, and continued talking about courting as if the mere thought of it wasn’t making Soobin’s insides buzz.  

“You’ve never courted anyone before, maybe you need some tips from your father—he was excellent at it when we first started dating.” There was a proud, fond look on her face as she looked over to her husband, who looked put on the spotlight, eyes wide.

“That was more than 20 years ago, dear,” he responded, scratching at the back of his neck.

When Soobin’s mom kept staring at her husband as if indicating that he should keep going, Soobin’s dad cleared his throat. “Well, in my case, I started with a well-thought through courting gift. Then when you hand it over, you want to make your intent clear, either with your words or with what type of gift it is.”

Soobin nodded; that much he knew, at least.

For the rest of the evening, Soobin felt more relaxed around his parents. They were so excited to talk to him about courting that even if Soobin tried to divert the conversation, they wouldn’t budge. They wanted to know all about his plans (his non-existent plans) and gave him more than enough advice on how to continue.

Going to bed that night, he felt very appreciative of his parents and their support. All the anxiety that had been building up inside him regarding seeing his parents again was blown away, and all he felt was content. Happy.

Still, the house didn’t quite feel like home anymore. He realized that as he lay there, staring up at the ceiling. Being there felt more like he was just there to visit his parents, and tomorrow he would be going back to Yeonjun again.

Back to their shared home.

As his parents’ many words about courting spun around in his head as he tried to fall asleep, Soobin dared to imagine a future where he and Yeonjun would never be separated. A future where they wore each other’s mark on their necks proudly, showing off their love to the world.

Hope was a dangerous thing. But it could also be empowering. And for perhaps the first time, Soobin let himself see it as a positive thing. Letting himself believe in hope, in a successful ending to his love story.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

It had been some time since Yeonjun hung out with Kai alone, but that night was just the same as always. Kai was being his usual loud self as they made their way through their favourite games at the arcade, screeching every time he thought Yeonjun was about to beat him, only to screech in a different pitch when he was winning.

He was, as always, incredibly endearing. Yeonjun loved spending time with him.

One thing that he appreciated was how easy it was to pretend with Kai. Or not even pretend. He didn’t have to think at all. Everything was just natural with him. Around him, Yeonjun could forget what a freak he was, not human but also not really a werewolf either, some kind of weird in between thing that was cursed to never fit in anywhere.

All the things that normally bothered him was forgotten tonight as he got swept away in the normalcy of hanging out with Kai.

He found himself reverting back to his old self, or at least he felt like it. Because Kai wasn’t wearing any scent blockers that reminded him of his inability to control himself. Kai didn’t bring up any werewolf related subjects, because why would he? Kai and Yeonjun had always been the humans of their group, and they used to rely on each other to be there to balance the others out. Yeonjun had been slightly worried that Kai would miss that and would act off around him, but he was the same as always.

And as much as Yeonjun was trying to accept what had happened to him, it was nice to feel human again, for a little while.

After spending maybe three hours at the arcade, their stomachs were complaining, so they finished up the game they were playing and decided to head to the closest supermarket to buy something to eat.

“Are you thinking the same as I am?” Yeonjun asked as they walked down the aisles. They both knew this shop like the back of their hands, as it was just next door to the arcade, and they had been there many times over the years.

Kai raised his eyebrows. “Ramen?”

“Ramen,” Yeonjun agreed.

They found the right aisle and picked out their favourite brand—after a small argument of which brand was the best, as per usual—before heading over to the snack’s aisle.

Yeonjun was pointing out his suggestions of snacks to get when someone cleared their throat next to them, making them turn their heads.

“Excuse me,” said the woman who stood behind them, a few steps back as if she didn’t want to get too close to them. Yeonjun noted she was wearing a name tag and a boring grey shirt that had to be part of her work outfit.

Her tone had been rather snarky, so Yeonjun raised a questioning eyebrow. She was at least twice their age, so he knew their best shot at not being yelled at was being as respectful as possible. “Yes?”

“I must ask you to leave,” she said, although her tone wasn’t matching her words. “I guess you didn’t see the signs, but we have a clear ‘No werewolf policy’ at this store.”

Yeonjun felt like he’d been doused in cold water. He stood frozen, just staring at her, thinking he must have heard it wrong. She… what? Was she being serious right now?

“I’m sorry, what?” Kai said, stepping around Yeonjun and quickly positioning himself between them. He almost acted like a human shield, making sure that the woman’s focus was on him and not Yeonjun.

“I said,” the lady repeated, her tone a tad bit more irritated than before, “that werewolves are not allowed in here, so I must ask you to leave.”

“Werewolves are not allowed? What the fuck?” Kai said, clearly not caring about being respectful. “We’ve been going to this store for years, and now you say we’re not allowed? We haven’t done anything wrong!”

Yeonjun felt a mix of gratefulness and horror at the fact that Kai was roping himself in under the werewolf name when there was no reason for him to get hate as well.

“I’m sorry but this is a new policy after an incident, and there’s nothing I can do to change it.”

Yeonjun felt something clawing at his throat, a painful sort of feeling that made him feel like running. Fleeing. Anything to get out of her judgemental gaze.

“That’s bullshit,” Kai kept on, growing agitated now. “I’m pretty sure that’s illegal, it’s discrimination against werewolves.”

“Kai,” Yeonjun mumbled from behind him, grabbing at his friend’s shirt with shaking hands. He could tell that Kai wanted to keep fighting, to stand up for Yeonjun, but he didn’t know if he could stand it. He might throw up. Or faint, who knew. He felt worn out and small, like an animal that had been kicked in the dirt. “Kai, let’s… let’s just go,” he added, only loud enough for Kai to hear.

Kai’s reaction was instant. He turned to look at Yeonjun, and his expression switched from angry to concerned. He glanced down at the packages of ramen in Yeonjun’s hands and nodded to himself. “You’re right,” he said, going to grab the packages, “they don’t deserve our money. Let’s just go, Hyung.”

With that he grabbed Yeonjun’s hand, keeping the ramen in the other, and pulled him away. As they passed the lady, who was looking at them with stern eyes, Kai pushed the packages into her hands angrily, before continuing pulling Yeonjun towards the exit. He didn’t stop stalking until they were a safe distance away from the shop.

Once they’d stopped, he turned on Yeonjun with a worried expression. “Are you okay? Hyung I’m so sorry that happened, I can’t believe there’s people who still think like that.”

Yeonjun hugged himself and tried to take a steady breath. He failed, but at least the cool, fresh air helped calm down the hot shame that was creeping up his neck. “I’m okay. A bit… surprised, I guess.”

“Hyung, you’re in shock,” Kai said kindly, stepping closer to run his hand up and down Yeonjun’s arm. “Let’s just go back to my place; I think I have a tub of mint-choco left since last time you came over.”

It was obvious that Kai was trying to distract him, and Yeonjun was grateful for it. It was just what he needed. He didn’t want to linger on it or talk about what he was feeling, because frankly he couldn’t put his emotions into words.

As they made their way back to Kai’s place, walking with their arms linked but not saying much, Yeonjun couldn’t stop wondering how that woman even knew he was a werewolf to begin with. She was clearly human, which meant she couldn’t have smelled him. Not that she would have been able to smell him anyways, since he was wearing the—

Oh. Realization hit him like a slap to the face. He was wearing scent blockers, and very noticeable ones at that. Fuck. Of course. Sure, they were similar to his skin colour, but they were big and placed on both sides of his neck, so of course she had seen them. Humans didn’t wear those, so it was like walking around with a big sign saying, ‘I’m a werewolf!’.

For a moment, he had the urge to forcefully pull his scent blockers off and throw them away, never to be seen again. He knew it was a stupid thought. He shouldn’t care that other people could see them since he needed them for his own safety. But that was easier said than done.

At Kai’s place, they ended up on the couch watching some old movie, bowls of ice cream already eaten and left standing on the table before them. They were occasionally talking, occasionally submerged in the plot, and slowly but surely Yeonjun started to relax after what happened earlier.

Perhaps halfway into the movie, he felt eyes on him and shifted his gaze to meet Kai’s, who was laying with his head in Yeonjun’s lap.

“What?” he asked with a laugh, feeling self-conscious about the angle Kai was looking at him from.

Kai smiled. “I just want you to know, I admire you Hyung. You’re really brave. And cool.”

Yeonjun froze, awfully touched. Still a bit sensitive from before, it almost brought tears to his eyes. “Yah,” he says, pinching Kai’s stomach. He couldn’t think of what else to say, not used to being vulnerable in front of Kai.

“I mean it,” Kai continued, not wanting Yeonjun to just brush over it. “And it’s not just because of what happened to you. You’re great, Hyung, no matter if you’re a human or an omega. And I really hate that she said that before. I hate that you have to face discrimination like that. That any of you have to face that.”

Yeonjun’s lips quivered slightly, but he ended up smiling down at his friend. “Thanks, Kai-ah. And thanks for standing up for me like that.”

“Of course, Hyung.”

It was quiet for another minute until Yeonjun spoke up again. “Hey, let’s not tell the others about this, yeah?”

Kai’s eyes froze on Yeonjun’s face for two seconds before his expression changed into something thoughtful. “Why?”

“They worry too much about me already. You all do.”

“Yeah, because we love you.”

Yeonjun smiled sadly. “I know.”

They looked at each other in silence, Yeonjun expectantly and Kai as if he was fighting against Yeonjun mentally. Eventually, Yeonjun seemed to win, as Kai huffed out a breath and said, “Okay fine. I won’t tell them.”

Yeonjun gave him a thankful kiss on the back of his hand.

They didn’t say much more after that, but they didn’t have to. When Kai moved to a sitting position, Yeonjun hugged him from the side, and for the rest of the night he felt a little less like a freak.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

With all the lectures Yeonjun had had with Beomgyu so far, it had dawned on him that there was a red line that Beomgyu was trying to ease him into realizing. A hidden message, one could even say. Which was that werewolves were highly sexual creatures—at least, much more so than humans.

Beomgyu never said it to him so outright, but there were hints. The number of times sex was brought up, for one, as well as the talk about how intense heats and ruts could be. Yeonjun had had a hard time accepting it, thinking that Beomgyu was just exaggerating. Then one day, he had put some effort into doing research on his own, and had found out that, for some inexplicable reason, their sex-drive was significantly higher than humans. Several sources also explained that their ‘animalistic instincts’ occasionally made their ‘urges’ harder to control, which just sounded surrealistic to Yeonjun.

It hadn’t been a problem for him, though. He had assumed that he was just different, being lab-made and all, because he didn’t feel much different on that part.

How fun it was to realize, then, just how wrong he’d been on that point. Because as soon as things were starting to calm down, and his life was starting to come back together again, he was beginning to see the signs.

It started with the dreams. Dreams in which he was being held down by Soobin and fucked in every position thinkable. But also dreams where he was being cared for, caressed and loved. All, very confusing, and simultaneously very arousing. More often than not, he woke up completely soaked and with an embarrassing problem to take care of—he thanked the heavens every day that Soobin slept like a log.

Unfortunately, it didn’t stop there. They could be in the middle of cleaning, and Soobin could bend over, and suddenly all kinds of images flooded Yeonjun’s brain, not to mention the feeling of hot arousal bursting through him. Or they could be seated on the couch and Soobin could reach for the bowl of popcorn, his arm muscles flexing slightly because of the effort, and Yeonjun had to cross his legs and think unhappy thoughts.

It was terrible. Not because he didn’t find Soobin sexy—oh lord did he find him sexy, always had—but because it was becoming a big problem having to hide it. He jerked off a whole lot more than usual; any time Soobin was in class—sometimes even when he was out for a grocery run.

The frustrating part was that jerking off somehow satiated him less than it normally did. Even if he reached his climax (granted, sometimes he didn’t even manage that) he felt off, like he wasn’t completely done. It bugged him, but he didn’t know what was wrong. And no, he was not about to ask Beomgyu about it. He didn’t care that werewolves were less prude than humans or whatever, he refused.

The worst of all… incidents happened on a day in March, not long after he and Kai had been thrown out of the grocery store.

It so happened that Kai had been there that day too. Kai had been with them last night (he had needed to bake cookies for his sister’s party and asked for their (read: Soobin’s) help) and ended up staying overnight. Since none of them had any specific plans that day, they decided to go out and get brunch together.

That wasn’t the problem. The problem was that Soobin—who normally showered in the evening, where he usually was very careful to put on his scent blockers and to get dressed before Yeonjun knew what happened—hadn’t had time to shower last night, and so he ended up doing it in the morning instead.

Only, he wasn’t so careful this time. Yeonjun was seated on the couch, scrolling on his phone, when a whiff of Soobin’s fresh, unhidden scent hit him the moment Soobin stepped out of the bathroom. It didn’t make sense how he smelled that strongly or that good after just having showered, and Yeonjun immediately stiffened.

His first mistake was when he turned his head and got a perfect view of Soobin by the bed, only a towel covering him and giving Yeonjun a show of his naked upper body. His abs and his pecs and his arms that bulged when he flexed and—

Yeonjun absolutely froze, fear blossoming inside him when he felt something wet trickle down into his boxers.

At first, he panicked. What the fuck. It took several seconds for logic to return to him and he remembered Beomgyu’s lessons.

Lubricating assholes. That was an omega thing. Right.

Still what the fuck, though.

The worst part was that Soobin didn’t even seem to realize what he was doing to Yeonjun. He was getting dressed, completely unaware of Yeonjun’s ogling. At least he hadn’t caught on to Yeonjun’s very physical reaction and the very reason he was panicking.

Yet.

Soobin’s scent was still billowing around him, making him lightheaded. He had to swallow down the spit that was gathering in his mouth. He was still facing Soobin; he should turn around. But Soobin had gotten dressed (when did that happen?) so he was safe.

He wasn’t safe. Because Soobin was wearing a pair of traitorous grey sweatpants, and Yeonjun knew exactly what Soobin in sweatpants meant. He tried—he really did—to stop his eyes from moving lower, but it was a losing game, honestly.

More of whatever that wet stuff coming out of his butt was trickled out, and Yeonjun was hit with reality, hard. He was wet, and turned on, and probably seconds away from Soobin finding out about his reaction.

He had to do something about it.

“Oh look at that, Beomgyu’s calling me, gotta take it!” he spat out, pulling his phone out of his pocket and rushing out of his seat. He just prayed that there wasn’t a wet spot left on his couch, and pulled his hoodie down low to cover his butt as he ran.

He might have interrupted one of them speaking, he really didn’t know, but he also really didn’t care. He was by the door in a second, pulling it open without hesitation as he lifted his phone to call the only person that could help him right now.

“Hyung, what are you—” he heard Soobin call after him, only to close the door behind him roughly.

The next second, Beomgyu was speaking in his ear. “What is it now, Hyung? I’m in the middle of—”

“Beomgyu, I have an emergency,” Yeonjun announced as started stalking down the hallway, leaving his own door far behind. He barely knew why he called Beomgyu in the first place; maybe because the younger was the only one he could ask anything omega related, and because (even if he wouldn’t admit it) Beomgyu was sort of his rock when it came to emergencies like this.

“Huh? Aren’t you with Soobin and Kai? What is it that—”

“I’m wet,” Yeonjun blurted, immediately blushing, and looking around, hoping no one else was near.

It was quiet from Beomgyu’s side for several seconds. “You are not talking about being soaked in the rain, are you.”

Yeonjun didn’t think it was even raining outside, so Beomgyu should know the answer to that question already. Still, he answered, “…no.”

Having walked the entirety of his corridor, Yeonjun stopped and turned around. He could see his own door on the other side, standing out to him as if illuminated by a red light, almost as if it was daring him to come back.

“Beomgyu I’m horny and Soobin and Kai are in my apartment. It’s…” Soobin’s naked body came into his mind again, and suddenly more of the wetness bellowed out and down his thighs. He shuddered. “It’s bad. What do I do?”

“Oh, that’s definitely a situation you’ve got there.” Beomgyu sounded like he had put down whatever it was he was focusing on when he started the call. “Okay, so, unless you want him to know—because he’s gonna know, the scent blockers won’t do anything about down there—you can’t go back inside.”

“I can’t just leave either, can I?”

“Well, you can say I called you and asked you to pick up something for me.”

“How’s that gonna help me? I’ll have to go back home sooner or later. If I leave, they will just wait until I come back.”

“Well, just come here, have a shower and go back. If they’re still there, he won’t be able to smell anything then.”

His words made sense, but Yeonjun knew that his friends would still wonder about his behaviour. Although, as he had reasoned several times before, it was better for them to think he was being weird than to know what was really going on.

“Okay, yeah,” he answered. “Yeah, I’ll do that. I, um… I shouldn’t take the bus like this, right?”

“Fuck,” Beomgyu replied, seeming to have realized something. “No. Definitely don’t do that. We’ll come and get you, just… don’t move.”

Yeonjun thanked Beomgyu before ending the call. Only afterwards, he realized Beomgyu had said ‘we’. It left him standing there in confusion with his phone to his ear for a few seconds, before he was reminded of the situation in his pants again.

Someone was walking down the corridor, someone Yeonjun didn’t know but could tell even from a distance was an alpha. Panic surged through him as he looked around, trying to figure out where to go. There were only the stairs between them, and he would have to run to get there before the guy.

So, he ran. He ran from the guy on the other side of the corridor—depicting the idea of an alpha finding him like this—and from his friends still stuck in his apartment, probably waiting for him to come back.

It was bright and only slightly cold outside, and he was immediately reminded that it was the middle of the day and people were bound the be out on the streets. Maybe it would have been wiser to stay in the building, but Yeonjun couldn’t make himself turn back. Instead, he ran to the side of the building, into the alley he was pretty sure was only vacated during the dark hours.

Halfway into the alley, Yeonjun stopped to lean against the building wall. There, he let out a heaving breath, finally allowing himself some air after running like a madman. It was only then that he was reminded about his predicament. As his heart started slowing down, the feeling of stickiness between his legs made him shiver.

What was worse was how it didn’t stop. Maybe it would have, if he could keep the image of Soobin out of his mind. But as soon as he remembered the ghost of his arousal, it came back in a strong wave. Blood was rushing south at the same time as his hole suddenly clenched hard, searching for something that was not there.

Fucking hell. He’d never had a reaction as strong as this before.

A whimper escaped him, and suddenly his legs felt weak. Another wave hit him, and he made the intelligent decision to crouch, his arms on his knees to hide the erection that was quickly growing.

What was taking Beomgyu so long? He said he’d come and get him, how long could it take?

His phone was ringing. With fumbling hands, he managed to pull it up, only to stare wide eyed down at it. Soobin was calling him. Shit. He had been gone for too long, and of course Soobin would notice. Fuck. If Soobin came out looking for him, there was no doubt he would find him. The mere thought of that happening made Yeonjun nauseous.

Still, he didn’t answer. He let the call go to voicemail, guilt building up inside as he pocketed his phone again.

If he’d been in a more of a stable mindset, he would have pulled his phone back out and sent them an apologetic text. Some sort of explanation.

But just the thought of focusing and writing out some kind of explanation with his now shaking hands brought him shame; he didn’t know if he could write anything coherent right now.

He felt drunk. Drunk on horniness.

It was strange, surreal almost, this feeling like he wasn’t entirely in his right mind, and all because of arousal. In all the times he’d been turned on before, he’d never experienced something like this.

Keeping his gaze down, he forced himself to take deep breaths. And trying to make the horny to go away.

Think about sad stuff, he told himself. Anything not sexy. Children crying. Karens yelling at you in the store. Hurt puppies. Cute puppies. And kittens. Those aren’t sexy. They are just cute. And bunnies, yeah bunnies are cute too. Cute bunnies and the way they scrunch up their nose, the same way Soobin does when he—

And he was thinking about it again.

Why couldn’t he get Soobin’s abs out of his mind? Was it his scent that had sent him into this frenzy? Soobin had always looked like that, had always had abs to flaunt, a great ass and co—

Ah fuck.

When Beomgyu found him minutes later—by scent most likely, since he wasn’t answering his phone—he felt like he was losing his mind. He wasn’t even embarrassed to be found like that. It was only Beomgyu, anyways. As much as he hadn’t wanted to talk to him about this before, he was rather comfortable to let him see him like this, surprisingly enough.

Only, it wasn’t just Beomgyu that had come to get him, he was about to find out.

“You should breathe through your mouth,” Beomgyu said as he threw Yeonjun in the backseat of the car he instantly recognized. It took Yeonjun a second to realize Beomgyu wasn’t speaking to him, but to poor Taehyun who was sitting behind the wheel.

“Fuck,” Yeonjun said as he noticed the younger. Shame washed over him, and he quickly hid his front under one of Beomgyu’s jackets he found next to him. “Tae I’m so sorry—”

As soon as Beomgyu was inside, Taehyun sped away from the building. His hands were gripping the steering wheel in a steel grip. “Don’t worry, Hyung,” Taehyun said in a restrained voice, his eyes focused on the road. “These things happen. It’s not your fault.”

“What happened, anyways?” Beomgyu asked, and Yeonjun noticed he was holding his hand in front of his mouth and nose, seemingly trying to not breathe in too much of Yeonjun either.

Was his scent really that strong that even Beomgyu was affected?

“I—” Yeonjun faltered, getting distracted by his hole clenching again as he thought about Soobin once more. It dawned on him that Beomgyu wasn’t aware of his feelings for Soobin, and suddenly the situation became even more humiliating.

But considering how many times Beomgyu had saved him, how many times he had gone out of his way to help him, maybe it was only fair that he tell him about this.

“Soobin came out of the shower without scent blockers,” he admitted, hanging his head a little. He didn’t want to see their reaction, not the way Taehyun would nod in understanding nor the way Beomgyu would most likely stare at him in surprise.

He still heard Beomgyu’s reaction, though. “Huh?”

“He was shirtless, and his smell hit me pretty hard,” Yeonjun added shamefully.

Even without looking up, Yeonjun could tell Beomgyu had turned in his seat to stare at him in confusion. “You saw Soobin shirtless and that made you all… crazy aroused?”

“I’m in love with him,” Yeonjun blurted, letting the secret out of the box without a second thought. Ah, he really was out of it, wasn’t he?

“You’re WHAT?!” Beomgyu nearly yelled, his head snapping back and forth between Yeonjun and Taehyun several times. “You’re in love with him?! How have you not told me about this? This is a big deal, Soobin has to—”

Taehyun’s hand shot out to block any more words from coming out of Beomgyu, and the youngest gave Beomgyu a quick glare before focusing back on the road again. Yeonjun wasn’t sure what it was about, but clearly Beomgyu had understood because he fell quiet immediately.

They reached Beomgyu’s apartment not long thereafter, and Yeonjun was infinitely grateful for his friends as they gave him some privacy in the bathroom. He could tell Beomgyu and Taehyun were going to have some kind of serious conversation, judging by the way Taehyun was dragging Beomgyu away, and frankly he was glad he didn’t have to be part of that. It was surely going to be about him, but he didn’t care. All he needed was to get himself off and then shower away any remains of this whole thing.

To his own frustration, jerking off did little to nothing this time. It was way worse than any of the other times he’d done it.

Standing there in the shower frustrated and horny as hell, he finally understood why.

With his fingers shoved deep inside himself, it still took him longer than he wished before he finally reached his climax. It was hard, reaching deep enough whilst standing leaning against the cold shower wall. When he did reach it though, he was seeing white. He couldn’t tell whether anything was coming out of his mouth, but if it did, it was surely Soobin’s name he was crying out. Oh well, it wasn’t like his friends didn’t already know anyways.

He gave himself a solid twenty minutes in the shower afterwards, making sure to wash anything and everything off. He even used Beomgyu’s very expensive looking soap twice, because he needed to not smell like sex when he went out of there.

Ages later, Yeonjun stepped out of the bathroom with Beomgyu’s robe tucked around himself. He wished he didn’t have to face his friends after that whole humiliating ordeal, but of course his wish wasn’t answered. As soon as he stepped foot outside, he could feel their eyes on him.

Both were sitting on Beomgyu’s couch, watching him. It was clear he wouldn’t be able to avoid having this conversation with them, so he sighed and walked over to join them.

“Hey,” he said when none of them seemed to want to speak first.

“Hey,” Taehyun repeated, raising one eyebrow.

“Okay, so this is awkward,” Yeonjun continued after another silence. He sat down in the armchair next to the couch, slouching in his seat. “Can you guys just forget about this, and we never have to talk about it again?”

“Believe me, I don’t want to talk about this,” Taehyun said with a glance Beomgyu’s way.

Yeonjun finally looked at Beomgyu, and immediately wished he hadn’t. The younger was staring at him with slightly narrowed eyes, leaning towards him in his seat. He looked like a hawk studying its pray before pouncing on it.

“I can’t believe you guys kept this from me for so long!” he finally spat out, shaking his head.

“Kept what from you?” Yeonjun asked, frowning. “My feelings or my sexual attraction to Soobin?”

Taehyun groaned and looked away as Beomgyu answered, “Both! It would have been great to know about this, really.”

“I don’t see how you knowing would make anything better, but sure, sorry for not telling you, I guess.”

Beomgyu looked like he was about to say something when Taehyun fixed him with a deadly look. “Don’t say another word,” he told him, tone serious.

After looking between them for a second, Yeonjun raised himself to his feet. “Oookay. I don’t know what’s going on but… great talk.” He pulled the bathrobe a little tighter around himself as a thought hit him. “Can I borrow some clothes? I shouldn’t stay too long, or Soobin and Kai are gonna wonder.”

“I mean, you can borrow some of mine if you find anything that fit,” Beomgyu said with a shrug. He pointed Yeonjun in the direction of his room. “And, you know, they’re probably gonna wonder anyways.”

“Great,” Yeonjun muttered as he made his way over to Beomgyu’s bedroom. “Thanks,” he called as he went, lifting a hand in the air.

Beomgyu was smaller than him, so most pants would be short on him, but it would just have to do. He dressed in a pair of jeans and a hoodie that were freshly washed, so they didn’t smell of Beomgyu. When he walked back out into the living room, he found Taehyun and Beomgyu arguing in hushed voices.

“Hey, so thanks a lot guys,” he said, announcing his presence. He noticed the way they quieted immediately, and briefly wondered if their argument was about him. “You guys really saved me today; I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”

“You could have just told Soobin about your feelings and avoided getting into this situation in the first place,” Beomgyu suggested, which caused Taehyun to slap his arm lightly and Yeonjun let out a deep sigh.

“Easier said than done,” he said, giving Beomgyu a pointed look before shifting his eyes to Taehyun. Beomgyu seemed to catch his message, judging by the way his mouth opened and closed before settling on not arguing any longer.

“Don’t worry, Hyung.” Taehyun got to his feet and approached Yeonjun, giving him a reassuring side hug. “I’ll make sure he won’t say anything to Soobin.”

Yeonjun smiled. “Thanks, Tae.”

“I’m not a snitch!” Beomgyu protested, pouting.

Looking at his phone, Yeonjun realized he had been gone well over an hour now. During which time, several messages had gone unanswered. “I better get going before they think I’ve gone missing or something.”

“Yeah, probably for the best,” Taehyun said with a cheeky grin.

“Thanks again. I know it was… awkward.” He thought back to the car ride, to what it must’ve been like for Taehyun to be in a car with a horny omega.

“Don’t worry about it.” Taehyun—the angel—said.

“Yeah, it’s fine,” Beomgyu filled in, getting to his feet as well. “It happens to the best of us.”

For good measure, Yeonjun apologized and thanked them one more time before leaving. He took the bus back to his apartment, only then checking his phone.

Several of the messages were from Soobin, worriedly asking if Beomgyu was okay, and then if Yeonjun was okay. Kai had asked if they should stay at his apartment or meet up at the restaurant later. Then Soobin had tried calling him a few times, and Kai once. After he hadn’t answered, Soobin’s messages were quite a lot more worried, but Yeonjun could tell he had tried to not be too overbearing. His final message, which came twenty minutes before Yeonjun got on the bus, read:

Soobin

Hyung, please call me when you’re done, we’re getting worried here. Is this just a Beomgyu situation or did something happen?

Oh, his sweet, sweet Soobin.

He didn’t hesitate to call, and the younger picked up before the second ring.

“Hyung, where are you!?”

“I’m on my way back from Beomgyu’s,” he said in a calm voice, noticing the distress in Soobin’s voice.

“Are you alright? Did something happen? Why did you leave without saying anything?”

“I- uh. It was kind of… an emergency.” He racked his brain. Either he told Soobin that Beomgyu had an emergency that he had to help him with, or he told him—part of—the truth, that he himself had an emergency. He never liked lying to Soobin. “I kind of had a reaction, and I needed Beomgyu’s help with it. Sorry for just leaving, but I didn’t know if being in an alpha’s presence then was a good idea.”

Soobin was quiet for several seconds, and Yeonjun worried he had hung up before he finally said. “Ah. Um, I see. I understand.” He sounded just like he did when he was acting like something wasn’t bothering him, and Yeonjun realized too late what his words might mean to Soobin.

“It wasn’t anything you did! It wasn’t like that, I promise. It was more… me being embarrassed than anything else.” That was as much he could tell Soobin without telling him the whole truth, and he just hoped Soobin wouldn’t be able to figure out what happened from that.

“Oh. Are you okay now, though?”

“I’m just fine. Are you guys still at the apartment?”

“Yeah, we wanted to wait for you. Kai’s listening, by the way.”

“Hi Hyuka!” he exclaimed, hearing the youngest groan at him from behind Soobin. It brought a smile to his face. “Yeah, okay, I’m home in like five minutes. Meet me at the entrance and we can leave for brunch?”

When he met them outside his building, he knew that they immediately noticed his change of clothes. He was grateful neither of them commented on it. To his surprise, as soon as he was close, Soobin pulled him into his arms and held him tightly. He was wearing his scent blockers again.

“Hyung, I was worried,” he mumbled into Yeonjun’s shoulder.

Yeonjun startled. Really? “I was just gone for like an hour.”

Soobin breathed in against his neck, where Yeonjun had placed fresh scent blockers over at Beomgyu’s place in fear of his scent still showing traces of his arousal. “Yeah but you just… disappeared, and you weren’t answering your phone.”

Yeonjun glanced up, seeing Kai standing behind Soobin with an unsure look on his face.

“I… I didn’t think…” Yeonjun said, frowning.

“After what happened last time,” Kai said, his smile forced, “we couldn’t help but worry when you kept not answering your phone.”

Yeonjun’s heart squeezed painfully inside his chest. He hadn’t even realized.

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry,” he said, quickly lifting one arm towards Kai so he could bring the younger into their embrace too. “I’m so, so sorry. I won’t do that again. I should have told you more clearly.”

“It’s fine, Hyung,” Soobin mumbled against him, but Yeonjun could hear the hurt in his voice.

“No, I’m really sorry. It was selfish of me.” He squeezed his friends tightly, trying to convey how sorry he was. “I won’t do that again, I promise.”

They stepped out of the embrace, and Yeonjun ruffled their hair. “Come on, let’s get some food. My treat.”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Later that night, Yeonjun received a text from Beomgyu that gave him the reality check he probably needed.

Beomgyu

Considering the incident today

I think we should practice more on your reactions to our scents

Yeonjun

How do you mean, exactly?

Beomgyu

Well, you clearly /reacted/ to Soobin’s scent

Now that I know why you’re reacting stronger to him, I can take that into account

Also, you’re still really bad at controlling your own scent

Yeonjun

You say that as if you’ve actually shown me how to do it

Your explanations never make any sense

Beomgyu

Excuse you, im the best teacher you’ve ever had

Yeonjun

You’re the only teacher I’ve ever had about werewolf things

Beomgyu

Point still stands

But anyways, come over tomorrow, I’ll bring Taehyunnie. Maybe he has some useful ideas

Yeonjun

Alright

Should I bring snacks?

Beomgyu

You know I love it when you do

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

As expected, Taehyun was already at Beomgyu’s place when Yeonjun arrived. In fact, he was there before Beomgyu had shown up, which Yeonjun found especially interesting.

“What’s going on with you and Beomgyu lately?” Yeonjun asked, sitting down on the couch next to Taehyun. There was a book and an empty cup on the table in front of them, indicating Taehyun had probably been there a while.

Big eyes turned on Yeonjun. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Yeonjun said, dragging out the last word, “you hang out all the time. You show up to school together, you have sleepovers in the middle of the week, and you’re at his apartment when he’s not even here.”

Taehyun gave a shrug. “I didn’t know he wouldn’t be here yet when I arrived,” he said, choosing not to answer the previous questions.

“Then how did you enter?”

“He gave me his spare key.”

Yeonjun gave him a pointed look.

“There’s nothing going on!” Taehyun said, and Yeonjun thought he was sounding rather defensive. “I like hanging out with him, and he asks me if I want to come over a lot, so that’s why we hang out often. Stop being annoying.”

Letting out an amused chuckle, Yeonjun ruffled Taehyun’s hair. “Sure thing. Just tell me one thing, then.”

“What?”

“Why are you wearing his hoodie?”

Taehyun looked down at himself in surprise, as if he hadn’t noticed what Yeonjun had. The hoodie he was wearing was cream coloured and fluffy, clearly more of Beomgyu’s style than Taehyun’s. It was also very evident that it belonged to Beomgyu because Yeonjun could smell the omega’s scent from where he was sitting.

“I—” Taehyun seemed at a loss for words.

“Do you like that it smells like him?” Yeonjun asked, tone slightly teasing. It earned him a shove from Taehyun, but it was worth it considering the blush appearing on Taehyun’s cheeks.

“I was cold, and it was just lying here. It’s very comfy.”

Yeonjun controlled his face and nodded dramatically. On the inside, he was beaming at the thought of Taehyun maybe having some sort of interest in Beomgyu. Of course, he couldn’t tell if that’s what it was, if Taehyun was having a small (and repressed) crush on Beomgyu, or if the two of them just had that kind of friendship.

He didn’t press Taehyun on it any more than that, and not long thereafter Beomgyu showed up.

“Oh, good, you’re already here!” Beomgyu exclaimed when he came through the front door, carrying a paper bag in both arms. Immediately, he kicked off his shoes and came to join them in the living room. “Did you bring snacks?”

“I left them in the kitchen,” Yeonjun said with a nod, pointing at where he’d dropped of his bag earlier. “Where have you been?”

“I went to get a few things that you can practice on,” Beomgyu said cryptically before he put the bag on the table before them. Yeonjun leaned over, glancing into the bag, and was immediately hit by a strong scent he recognized very well. It made him gasp and blink stupidly as his mind warred against itself, trying to decide if he wanted to push his nose inside the bag or run from it.

Taehyun had done the same as Yeonjun, but his reaction to the scent was more neutral than Yeonjun’s. “You brought Soobin’s clothes?”

“Yup!” Beomgyu grinned. “I went by his parents’ house and said Soobin asked me to get a few things from his room. I thought it would be smarter to get a few things he hasn’t worn in a while, so the scent wouldn’t be too strong.”

“You went to his parents’ house, and they just let you in like that?” Yeonjun asked. “Didn’t they question you?”

“I’ll have you know, I’m very good with parents,” Beomgyu answered with a wiggle of the eyebrows. “And Soobin’s parents adore me, they’ve met me before, so it wasn’t exactly hard.”

Not knowing how he felt about that, Yeonjun stayed quiet, watching him with narrowed eyes.

Rubbing his hands together, Beomgyu went straight to business. “Now, to start off, I think it’s time for you to face your fears head on.”

Yeonjun shared an amused look with Taehyun. “My fears being Soobin’s scent?”

“Yes and no,” Beomgyu said, taking a more serious approach. “I think what you’re actually scared of is your own reaction to Soobin’s scent. You’re scared he’s going to notice what it does to you, which is why you don’t want to remove the scent blockers even though we’ve discussed going without them.”

Oh. Well, he hit the nail right on the head there, didn’t he. Even if Yeonjun hadn’t exactly formulated it in his own brain yet, he knew that Beomgyu was right. The problem was all within himself. Soobin smelling incredible wasn’t the problem, nor was the fact that Yeonjun liked how he smelled. It all chalked up to that last part, that Yeonjun’s body reacted way too strongly to it, in a way that he had no control over.

He had hoped that the problem would go away if they just continued wearing the scent blockers, but clearly, that plan wasn’t going to work out. It already wasn’t working out, considering his reaction yesterday.

So, he was grateful that Beomgyu was doing this, both dragging him into another lesson and forcing him to face reality.

Beomgyu noticed Yeonjun struggling to answer, so he just moved right on. “I think you need to acclimatize. If you never let yourself get used to it, Soobin’s scent it’s gonna hit you like a trainwreck every time, and we’ll be right back to what happened yesterday.” Yeonjun nodded bashfully. There was no use in arguing. “Now, first step,” Beomgyu pulled up one of the items he’d brought, an old hoodie of Soobin’s that Yeonjun remembered well, “put this on.”

Yeonjun shrugged. He could do that—he’d shared clothes with Soobin millions of times.

When he put it on, his instant reaction was to shove his nose deep into the fabric and suck in as much of the scent as he could. It was there, although clearly muted. Faded. It only smelled of vanilla and incense, no traces of pheromones or anything muskier that could cause any strong reactions.

“Okay, easy there, tiger,” Beomgyu snorted, “I know he smells good and all, but if you’re going for not-so-obvious then you’ll have to act more normal.”

Somehow, hearing Beomgyu comment on Soobin’s smell made him want to growl possessively, but he bit it down forcefully. He let the hoodie fall from his grasp, lifting his head to roll his eyes at Beomgyu.

“He’s doing alright,” Taehyun commented, leaning back a little in his seat. He played with a loose thread in his jeans, glancing carefully up at Beomgyu. “You, uh, you think Soobin smells good?”

Yeonjun nearly gaped at the sudden insecure tone Taehyun was speaking with, and the way he tried to be nonchalant while asking such a loaded question. He whipped his head around trying to catch Beomgyu’s reaction.

But Beomgyu didn’t see the seriousness of the question and just laughed it off. “Well, yeah, course he does. He smells like coming home, you know, like a very comforting, warm type of smell.”

Yeonjun wanted to hit Beomgyu. That was a terrible response, and one look at Taehyun told him so. The alpha was pouting, which was very unusual to see because Taehyun usually controlled his expression well.

He looked at Beomgyu, giving him a very distinct Look that he hoped he would get. Beomgyu stared back at him, scowling in a clearly confused way, and Yeonjun had to signal very obviously with his eyes in Taehyun’s direction for him to get it.

When it clicked, though, Beomgyu’s eyes blew wide, and he shifted his gaze to Taehyun. Thankfully, Taehyun happened to be looking away at just that moment and didn’t catch Beomgyu’s reaction, only looking back at him when Beomgyu stuttered out more words.

“Ah but it’s just, like, nice. Not anything special, really. He smells good but not, like, great. Just like any regular, kind alpha, you know.”

Yeonjun sighed. Well. He didn’t know what to say to that. And when Taehyun looked up at Beomgyu with a tight expression on his face, Yeonjun felt even more out of his depth.

“Ah, yeah sure,” Taehyun responded, just as awkwardly as Beomgyu. “I get it.”

The tension was suddenly through the roof, and Yeonjun couldn’t take it a second longer. “I don’t agree with you at all,” he said with a smirk, trying to act like nothing was wrong, “but can we talk about what the next step is now? I’m wearing the hoodie, what now?”

Beomgyu looked at him like he just saved his life, and quickly jumped on the excuse to move on. “Right! The next step!”

The next step of Beomgyu’s plan turned out to just relax and go about his day while keeping something of Soobin’s on him at all times, to ensure he was getting used to have Soobin’s scent around him.

Taehyun suggested they do something active, to simulate any regular day in Yeonjun’s life, so they ended up deciding to go out for some shopping.

Yeonjun had hoped that by leaving the apartment behind, the awkward tension between his friends would lessen, but that didn’t seem to be the case. It so happened that Yeonjun found himself walking in the middle and even having to bridge the conversation between them.

He hated it. It was weird, because normally, Taehyun and Beomgyu were chatterboxes turned even worse when put together. But Yeonjun didn’t know how to make it better without forcing them to talk it out. It wasn’t until Taehyun needed a bathroom break that he dared to talk to Beomgyu about it.

“What the hell is this tension between you two?”

Beomgyu blinked rapidly, flustered or perhaps embarrassed by the question. “I don’t know,” he whined. “I’m just embarrassed, do you think he noticed how desperate I was to mention I don’t find Soobin’s scent that good?”

“Well, I noticed so he for sure noticed, but he probably doesn’t get what you meant.” Yeonjun placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You know what you should have said though?”

Shyly, Beomgyu shook his head.

“You should have said that Soobin’s scent doesn’t come close to his scent. I know I don’t know everything there is to know about alphas and this type of stuff, but one thing I do know is that they like hearing that we like their scent.”

Beomgyu sighed, pouting. “You’re right, I should have. I just panicked.” He glanced over in the direction Taehyun had left. “It’s too late now, though, isn’t it?”

Yeonjun swore he could hear the flush of a toilet not too far away, although one glance over showed that the door to the toilet was still closed. “I don’t know,” he said truthfully. Next, there was the sound of the water running in the sink, and he got a sudden idea.

Trying to be subtle, he shifted on his feet, forcing Beomgyu to turn with him until the bathroom no longer was straight in his sight. “What would you have said then, you know, about his scent?”

Beomgyu bit his lip shyly. “Oh, I don’t—”

“He smells good, though, right?” Yeonjun asked, prompting him a little. It was true that Taehyun smelled good, better than any random alpha Yeonjun came across in his everyday life. He smelled of oranges and something warm that was hard to name. Cedarwood? Sandalwood? Yeonjun had no clue. But he smelled like a calm, nice perfume that Yeonjun could have seen himself buying back when he was human.

“He does,” Beomgyu breathed out. He glanced around, and then it looked like he was visibly letting himself go, relaxing his body and falling into Yeonjun, forehead leaning against the taller omega’s arm. “Taehyunnie smells so good, it was the first thing I noticed about him. You know, back before I met Soobin, I saw Taehyun at school one day and I thought he was so handsome. And at first, that was that. Then, I stood behind him in the queue to buy lunch one day, and I realized he didn’t just look like a god, he smelled like one too.”

Yeonjun found himself chuckling at Beomgyu’s unguarded admission. He could be a menace sometimes, but he could also be so incredibly cute that Yeonjun just wanted to take hold of him and shake him like a little puppy.

Over Beomgyu’s shoulder, he saw the door opening and Taehyun finally returning. He was still a bit far away, but surely not far enough to not hear them with his werewolf hearing.

“So, what you’re saying is,” Yeonjun asked, directing his attention to Beomgyu who was still leaning against him, “that you think Taehyun smells better than Soobin? Is that what I’m hearing?”

“Well duh,” Beomgyu said, lifting his head so he could roll his eyes at Yeonjun. “I know I said Soobin smells good before, but there’s no reality where you could get me to say that Soobin smells better than Taehyun. Nuh uh.”

Yeonjun had to bite his lip to prevent from grinning when he saw Taehyun’s eyes widening where he was approaching them, already halfway there. He had clearly heard all that, and Yeonjun didn’t think there was anything Beomgyu could have said that was better than that.

Unfortunately, Beomgyu noticed Yeonjun’s gaze shifting, and turned around only to see Taehyun. He let out a high-pitched little sound and froze, stupefied, face draining of all color as Taehyun walked the last of the distance between them.

Yeonjun just hoped that he hadn’t been doing too much of meddling by getting Beomgyu to admit that while knowing that Taehyun was listening.

“Hey,” was the first thing Taehyun said when he came to a halt. He glanced at Yeonjun for a moment, before licking his lips and taking a deep breath as if to steady himself. “I uh… you too.”

Beomgyu hugged himself self-consciously. “Me too what?”

“You… you smell really good too. Your scent, I mean, it’s… really nice.”

Yeonjun wanted to laugh at how well it all was turning out. Finally, some progress was being made here.

“Oh.” Some color slowly returned to Beomgyu’s face, splotches of red hitting his cheeks and the back of his neck.

“Yeah.”

They were just looking at each other now, neither of them seeming like they were planning on saying anything else. Which, in other circumstance would’ve been good, if only Yeonjun hadn’t been there right next to them, wondering what the hell he was supposed to do know.

“Uh, should I leave or—?”

As if suddenly remembering he was there, Beomgyu’s nerves finally got the better of him and he burst out laughing. “No, sorry, we’re still not done of course. We’re still working on your problem.”

Taehyun looked much more relaxed now, and when Beomgyu dove right back into his role as Yeonjun’s teacher, he was smiling and nodding along rather than looking like he wanted to be anywhere but there.

An hour or so later, they returned to Beomgyu’s apartment, and Beomgyu immediately instructed Yeonjun to change into a different one of Soobin’s clothes, stating that the other one must’ve lost some scent already.

They hung out a little longer, just chatting and watching some YouTube videos. Any tension that had been there earlier was blown away, completely forgotten by all of them, and Yeonjun was thankful for that.

Still, later as he and Taehyun left together, he couldn’t help wondering what Taehyun’s thoughts about it all were.

Surprisingly, Taehyun was the one to bring it up. “So, um, about what you said earlier,” he said, walking and looking straight ahead, ears a tiny bit flushed.

“What part that I said earlier?” Yeonjun had said a lot of things earlier, considering they had been hanging out for hours.

“You know, um. About me and Beomgyu-hyung. I know you must wonder about… you know, all that scent talk. But… it’s not like that, if that’s what you thought.”

Yeonjun stared at him. “I’m lost.”

“Like. I don’t know. It’s not that deep. Just because we both think the other smells nice doesn’t mean there’s anything going on between or us anything.”

Oh. So that’s what he was playing at.

“Uh huh,” Yeonjun answered, not at all convinced. “Then why were you so damn sulky when he said he likes Soobin’s scent.”

“I wasn’t sulking,” Taehyun muttered. Then, he met Yeonjun’s eyes and shrugged. “I was just bummed for your sake because I thought Beomgyu still liked Soobin.”

“You know I don’t believe a word you’re saying, right?”

“Why?” Taehyun frowned. “You think I like Beomgyu-hyung? That’s ridiculous!”

“Why would that be ridiculous? You spend a lot of time with him, so why couldn’t you like him romantically?”

“But Beomgyu’s just… Beomgyu. I can’t like him like that, it doesn’t make sense.”

Yeonjun pulled on Taehyun’s arm, forcing him to a stop. “Should I be offended for Beomgyu’s sake? Do you mean he’s not likeable like that?” Taehyun’s eyes widened and he quickly shook his head. “Look,” Yeonjun continued, crossing his arms over his chest. “If you don’t like him, then you don’t like him. Fair enough. But I think you do, because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be so defensive about it.”

“I—”

“And,” Yeonjun interrupted, pushing a teasing finger into Taehyun’s shoulder, “that would explain why you wanted him to admit he likes your scent more. But what do I know.” He shrugged, starting to walk again without waiting for Taehyun to follow.

The alpha quickly caught up. “But…” Yeonjun kept quiet, letting Taehyun come to his own conclusions. “Fine. How do I know if I like him, then?”

Yeonjun chuckled. This was a topic he was an expert on. “Do you think about him when he’s not around? Do you find yourself leaning closer to his touch, or instigate it a lot yourself? Is he the first person you look to in a group setting? Stuff like that shows how much he means to you.”

Taehyun looked perhaps even more lost than before, and Yeonjun felt a burst of sympathy for him. He slung an arm over Taehyun’s shoulder, pulling his best friend close, like a walking side hug. “Don’t stress too much about it. You’ll figure it out. Just remember: it’s not an all or nothing kind of thing. You can like him and still think he’s annoying. You can want to kiss him and also want to punch him when he’s teasing you. And you don’t have to be in love with him just because you find him attractive.”

Taehyun snorted. “Great advice, Hyung.”

Yeonjun patted his arm, grinning. “Any time.”

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Coming back home after several hours away from Soobin, Yeonjun was more clingy than normal. Funnily enough, so was Soobin. Yeonjun hadn’t taken more than three steps inside the door before Soobin was there, wrapping his arms around him instinctively.

“Hello to you too.”

“Missed you,” was all Soobin said as he tightened his grip around Yeonjun’s waist ever so slightly.

“Missed you too,” Yeonjun chuckled. He let Soobin hug him for a few more seconds, before his eagerness won over and he leaned back to look Soobin in the eye. “I have to tell you something about Taehyun and Beomgyu.”

Soobin laughed and let Yeonjun drag him to the couch to start his gossip session.

Before Yeonjun could do so, though, Soobin frowned and tilted his head to the side, grabbing at the hem of Yeonjun’s hoodie. “Is that my hoodie?”

“Uhhh, yeah?” He looked down at it, suddenly very aware that it was an old hoodie that Soobin would likely know he hadn’t taken with him to Yeonjun’s apartment.

“Where did you get it?”

“I…” Yeonjun couldn’t fight to switch the direction of the conversation any quicker. “Uhh I don’t know, does it matter? You have to hear what happened with Beomgyu and Taehyunnie, I almost died—”

Thankfully, Yeonjun managed to diverge Soobin’s attention to the gossip, at least for now. Soobin wasn’t stupid, though, and he would likely remember. Yeonjun just hoped he would have enough time until then to come up with a good excuse as to why he was suddenly walking around with an item smelling like Soobin at all times.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

The fact that Beomgyu now knew about his feelings for Soobin was both a blessing and a curse. Since Beomgyu was his go to person when it came to anything omega-related, he could now freely ask questions regarding Soobin and his feelings for him. Beomgyu didn’t have a choice but to listen.

It also meant that Beomgyu took every chance he got to tease Yeonjun about it. And of course, he was even worse than Kai.

“Hello lover boy,” Beomgyu greeted him when he found him alone at their lunch table. Soobin had gone ahead to order food for them, and the other two hadn’t arrived yet.

“You know I know about your crush as well, don’t you?” He said, pointing a finger at the other. “Say something in front of Soobin and I’ll end you. Taehyun-ah’s gonna get all the dirt I have on you.”

Beomgyu stuck out his tongue. “You say that as if you have any dirt on me. I’m the cleanest omega you’ll ever meet.”

“I highly doubt that.”

Beomgyu snorted before lifting his backpack and pulling out a notebook from it. “By the way, how’s the ‘acclimatizing’ going?”

After the ‘incident’, as they had come to call it, Beomgyu had basically instructed Yeonjun to continue wearing Soobin’s clothes as much as he could, trying to get used to Soobin’s scent (and to prevent another similar incident).

Doing so had been easier than Yeonjun had expected, not because he wasn’t reacting to Soobin’s scent—he sure was, embarrassingly enough—but because Soobin didn’t seem to suspect a thing. In fact, he seemed to like it when Yeonjun wore his clothes, if his cute, satisfied smiles were anything to go off, so Yeonjun did it whenever he felt like it.

“I’m working on it,” he answered. “I think I’m getting better. Maybe.”

He refrained from mentioning how he’d been trying to study for three hours last night, but Soobin’s scent had distracted him so badly that he’d barely managed to write 100 words on his assignment. 

“Well, the key is to do it in small steps that you escalate with time, you know,” Beomgyu said, going into teacher mode. “Like, having something that smells very little of him on you at all times, and when you get used to it, you can take something else that smells more, until you’re okay with his full scent.”

“I don’t think you understand how much his scent affects me,” Yeonjun muttered, wiping at his mouth with his sleeve as a distraction.

“No, no, I get it,” Beomgyu said. “You know I’m the same with Taehyunnie, right?”

Yeonjun looked him up and down, trying to imagine Beomgyu having a similar reaction as him. “I highly doubt that.”

“I don’t mean the ‘incident’, I mean that his scent affects me a lot. Distracts me, more than anything.”

Yeonjun hummed. Before he could say anything else, he caught sight on Soobin, on his way back to the table, balancing two trays like a gentleman. Excitement filled him, and he was about to stand to help him, but Beomgyu ended up being quicker.  

“Thanks Binnie,” Yeonjun mused as Soobin placed the tray in front of him, smiling like a dummy. The thought of his alpha serving him food made something warm settle in his stomach.  

As soon as he caught a whiff of the food, though, the reaction was immediate. He swallowed thickly, his stomach suddenly turning at the prospect of food.

Yeonjun barely noticed Soobin’s response, or the subsequent conversation happening between the other two, as he focused on not getting sick at the smell of the food. His stomach had been feeling a bit queasy the entire day, but not enough to be worrying. Not until now. He just hoped it was something he’d ate that was causing an upset stomach, and that it would go away quickly.

It wasn’t easy, but he got through lunch by eating small pieces at a time, until half of his dish was gone. He deemed that good enough, patting himself on the shoulder for that one.

Hours later, as he was on his way to meet the other four for an impromptu group dinner, he was still feeling nauseous. He didn’t know what to do about it—didn’t want to alarm any of the others—so when the time for ordering food came, he found the least heavy, tiniest portion of food he could find on the menu, which happened to be a Japanese soup he’d tried before and knew he liked.

“Not hungry?” Soobin asked with a concerned frown on his face. Which was reasonable, considering Yeonjun was usually the biggest foodie, ordering way more food than anyone else. Likely, it was starkly obvious that something was wrong when he wasn’t so into food.

He had to come up with an excuse quick. “Uh, not really, I couldn’t stop myself and got some snacks in between lectures earlier.”

Soobin looked him up and down, as if judging whether he was telling the truth or not. Thankfully, nothing about Yeonjun’s expression revealed his nausea, so Soobin nodded and let it go.

Despite the nausea, dinner was cosy. It was always fun, hanging out all five of them together. Yeonjun kept an eye on Taehyun, trying to see how he was reacting to Beomgyu considering the conversation they’d had on Saturday, but he could see no change in his behaviour.

After having been there for a few hours, having finished their food long ago, it was time to leave. The air outside had turned significantly colder, typical March weather that Yeonjun should have been prepared for. As soon as they stepped outside, the cold wind chilled him down to the bone. He hugged himself, preparing for a shivering walk home.

Yeonjun walked next to Kai, Soobin on the younger’s other side, watching Taehyun and Beomgyu walk on ahead of them. Kai and Soobin were arguing over who was the best at some game they both liked to play (that Yeonjun wasn’t even gonna pretend to know anything about because he barely knew how to pronounce the name of it) when an especially icy wind hit them. At that point, Yeonjun felt his teeth chattering and he was glad that he didn’t have to speak, or the others would have noticed.

However, Soobin had always been good at noticing when something was wrong with Yeonjun, so he should have expected it when Soobin called his name and asked if he was alright.

“I—I, I’m f-fine,” Yeonjun stuttered, the shivering affecting his speech just as he had feared.

“Hyung,” Kai said immediately, reaching out to touch his bare arm. “You’re freezing!”

Yeonjun waved his hand, about to say it was fine and they didn’t have that much further to go anyways, but Kai quickly took off his jacket, then his hoodie, and handed the latter to him. Before he registered what had happened, the hoodie was in his hands and Kai was already pulling his jacket back on.

“Take it,” Kai said, grinning. “We don’t want you to turn into an icicle, Hyung.”

Soobin nodded next to Kai, and Yeonjun realized neither of them would let it go until Yeonjun had put the hoodie on. Without further ado he did so, and he had to admit he was relieved to feel the worst of the cold disappear from his skin immediately.

At home later, Yeonjun found himself standing in the middle of the living room holding Kai’s hoodie in his hand and staring at it. Soobin was in the shower, but for once Yeonjun’s thoughts weren’t focused on him.

He liked this hoodie because it smelled just like Kai. The scent was faint, sure, but that didn’t matter. It smelled like Kai, and therefore Yeonjun had to keep it safe. He had to put it somewhere where the scent would be undisturbed, somewhere he could also get to it easily.

Yeonjun looked around the room, eyes scanning for the perfect spot to place the hoodie. On the bed? Then it would be close to him. But then him or Soobin might touch it or kick it onto the floor or something, and Yeonjun couldn’t risk Kai’s scent getting removed from it.

Maybe the couch? They didn’t sit there that often anyways; whenever their friend group hung out, they tended to gather at Beomgyu’s nowadays, since he had the largest place. The couch was close, and not somewhere it would necessarily be disturbed.

Without much further thought, Yeonjun settled on the couch.

He placed the hoodie in one corner and immediately lifted it and folded it before putting it down again. It didn’t look right the first time. The second time was a bit better, he just had to puff it around a little before being satisfied with how it looked.

His next action wasn’t very thought through, but it was spurred on by the loud sound of Soobin hitting something (perhaps his head or his toe) against something hard in the bathroom, leading to a curse slipping out of the alpha. Reminded of Soobin’s presence, Yeonjun perked up and instinctively moved to where the basket of dirty clothes was standing just outside the bathroom.

There was no need to dig around for long. Yeonjun quickly found the hoodie and t-shirt Soobin had been wearing earlier, both of which smelled strongly of Soobin. He let out a satisfied hum before running on his tiptoes back to the couch.

After much consideration, Yeonjun decided to place Soobin’s clothes around Kai’s, so as to not cover Kai’s scent or overtake it entirely. The pile looked sad, Yeonjun thought, and way too small. But it smelled nice, and it gave him a sense of pride looking at it. He just needed to add to it a bit before it would be perfect.

To shelter the pile a little, Yeonjun grabbed a blanket they rarely used and placed it carefully on top. His creation wasn’t even noticeable underneath the blanket, but that only spurred him on to find more pieces to add to it.

Yeonjun stood in the same spot, staring at the wall thoughtfully, when Soobin stepped out of the shower. Remembering what happened the last time he’d stared at Soobin’s bare chest, Yeonjun forced his gaze to stay locked on the wall until he heard the closet doors close, and he was sure Soobin was dressed.

“Hey.”

Yeonjun almost jumped when Soobin’s voice came from much closer than he expected. He turned and smiled immediately at seeing his best friend with his wet bangs covering his forehead, dressed in sweatpants and a white t-shirt.

“Hey, do you want to—” Yeonjun let out a surprised little sound when Soobin pulled him into an embrace. He felt the wet strands of hair against his ear, but it mattered very little as Soobin’s arms wrapped around him and he snuggled into his neck comfortably. “What’s this for?” he asked with a chuckle, a hand instinctively reach up to play with the hair at Soobin’s nape.

“I’m just happy,” Soobin replied. Yeonjun swore Soobin’s nose was pushing against his scent blocker, and it caused a shiver to run down his back. “It feels kind of perfect now that you and Beomgyu are getting along. It just… it makes me happy.”

“Oh,” Yeonjun said. He leaned back a little so he could see Soobin’s face but kept his hands on him. “I didn’t realise it affected you so much. But I’m also glad, he’s so much more than what I thought about him before. Even if he can be really annoying at times.”

A beautiful laugh poured out of Soobin at that, leaving Yeonjun awestruck for a moment as he felt the vibration of his laugh. He was so close to Soobin, and he could see every little detail on his face. Whenever he laughed or smiled brightly like this, Yeonjun’s eyes would zero in on his dimples. There was an urge to touch them, one he couldn’t control, and so before he knew it, he was pushing a finger into Soobin’s cheek.

It was definitely not the first time it happened, considering Yeonjun had always been obsessed with Soobin’s dimples, so Soobin barely reacted to it. Instead, he hugged Yeonjun harder for a moment before taking a deep breath and letting him go.

Yeonjun couldn’t help but pout as Soobin turned his back on him, moving to the kitchen to make them dinner. He followed, and ended up just standing next to Soobin, leaning against the counter and studying him (although anyone else would call it staring) as he cooked. Once again, he was hit by the domesticity of it all.

For the first time in a while, though, anxious thoughts made his insecurities bubble up to the surface. He didn’t know where they came from. The switch in his mood was almost comical, going from happy and content one second, to anxious and worried the next.

“Bin-ah,” he asked, wrapping an arm around his middle nervously. He waited for Soobin’s hum of acknowledgement before daring to continue. “How come you haven’t gotten tired of me yet?”

Soobin’s hands stilled by the frying pan. There was a frown on his face as he turned to look at Yeonjun, and even though Yeonjun logically knew that it only meant that Soobin was confused, a tiny part of him worried that he’d somehow upset the alpha.

“Why would I get tired of you?”

“We spend so much time with each other, I don’t know,” Yeonjun said with a self-conscious shrug, unable to look at Soobin now. “When we were kids, we used to fight and get annoyed at each other after hanging out for too long.”

“Hyung,” Soobin said, grinning, “that was so long ago. I think we’ve grown out of that phase, haven’t we?” Soobin’s eyes flickered down to Yeonjun’s body, taking in his defensive stance. “I love spending time with you, why would I get tired of you? You’re my favourite person. I’ll never get tired of you.”

“Are you sure? You’re not just staying here so you can keep an eye on me?”

Soobin let out a sigh and turned to face Yeonjun fully. “I mean, I can’t help but want to keep an eye on you but… it’s not for the reason you think.” He went to lean on the counter as well, mirroring Yeonjun’s pose, and stared out at the kitchen in front of them. “It’s not that I think you need someone to watch you… it’s… it’s just that… I can’t stand the thought of losing you again. So, I don’t want to leave your side unless you tell me I’m being annoying. Like I said, I’ll never get tired of you. I don’t want to be anywhere else.”

“O-ohhh,” was the only thing Yeonjun could get out. Emotions swelled in his chest at the admittance. Soobin was not one to speak so bluntly about how he was feeling. Hearing it now, spoken so bluntly, so easily, was almost a shock, but of the good kind. Suddenly he felt like he might cry, as Soobin’s words made him feel all gooey inside.

“So unless you’re getting tired of me, Hyung, I’m not going anywhere.”

Eyes glossy, Yeonjun let out a relieved laugh. He knocked his foot into Soobin’s, staring down at their socked feet next to each other.

“I could never get tired of my Soobinnie,” Yeonjun whispered. He turned his head to look up at Soobin, then, and blinked through the tears that he refused to let fall. “Thank you. For being here. Without you, I would have been a mess after everything that happened.” They shared a look, and with a smile Yeonjun added, “An even bigger mess, I mean.”

Soobin smiled and opened his mouth to say something, when the smell of something burning caught both of their attention.

“Shit, the pancake,” Soobin cursed, jumping into action to salvage what was left on the stove.

Yeonjun laughed heartily, watching Soobin flop the hard, blackened pancake onto a plate. He might’ve gotten used to spending his days with Soobin like this, but he was sure as hell never going to get tired of it.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next few days passed by quickly. Without thinking much about it, Yeonjun worked on increasing the collection of clothes on his couch, trying to get it to a satisfactory size. Whatever that was, he wasn’t sure. He just knew it wasn’t complete yet.

While he couldn’t exactly explain why he was doing it, he knew that it was important. With every item added, he felt a little more at ease, loving how the little pile grew into a more noticeable heap under the blanket.

He’d managed to snatch a few of Taehyun’s shirts and a pair of his sweatpants from the alpha’s room when he’d been there to hang out with the younger. Yeonjun didn’t think he would miss them. Then, after their most recent practice session, he’d also “borrowed” some clothes from Beomgyu which had quickly been added to the pile. Sadly, he’d only managed to get hold of one more item from Kai, seeing as they very rarely vacated Kai’s home. He compensated by adding more of Soobin clothes instead, because those weren’t exactly hard to come by. Then, just to ensure the size and look of it was satisfiable, he’d added a few of his own clothes as well.

Even if he didn’t know why exactly he was doing it, it gave him great satisfaction to put all their clothes together, because it meant their scents were getting blended all together. Every time he worked on the pile, he got a whiff of it, and it made something proud and happy grow in his chest.

The whole time he was doing it, it never occurred to him that what he was doing was weird. He’d been working on it for at least half the week, and by now the pile was big enough to reach almost the entire height of the couch. It was noticeable, and just looking at it gave him a sense of pride.

Soobin, however, didn’t seem to look at it in the same way.

It was Saturday, and they had plans for the guys to come over, so they had spent the afternoon cleaning up the apartment together. After doing the kitchen, Yeonjun went to pull out the vacuum cleaner, only to come into the living room to the sight of Soobin removing the blanket off his creation.

Instantly, Yeonjun froze. Panic seized him by the throat, alarm bells ringing in his ears, as if there was suddenly danger ahead.

“Maybe we should put this in the laundry basket?” Soobin wondered, looking at the pile with his head tilted in confusion, clearly not sensing Yeonjun’s reaction.

As if his brain had finally stopped lagging, Yeonjun surged forward in an attempt to stop Soobin from disturbing it, a cry of “stop!” escaping him as he went. Still, he was too slow. Soobin had picked up two of the topmost shirts, turning them around and squinting at them before his gaze turned to Yeonjun.

“What?” Soobin asked, but all Yeonjun saw, all he could focus on was how his perfect creation had been disturbed. Ruined.

He felt Soobin’s eyes on him when he reached the alpha’s side, but Yeonjun didn’t notice the confused look on Soobin’s face. Instead, a distressed whimper escaped him as he reached out his hand towards the pile.

“Ohhh,” he mumbled, hands moving over the pile but not touching, not knowing what to do now that it had been disturbed. “Oh no. It’s—it’s all wrong. Why did you…”

There was no better explanation than that it was just wrong. It wasn’t Soobin’s touch per se that ruined it, but the fact that the perfect order Yeonjun had created was no longer in place. To fix it, he would have to redo it, to make it perfect again.

Yes. Redo do it. Start over, he could do that. But then, he needed to move it, didn’t he? The guys were coming over anyways, so the couch wasn’t exactly ideal anymore. Then, where should he put it?

The bed was made and there were hours left until they would go to sleep. It would have to do. Yeonjun just needed it to be complete and perfect again, because seeing it now made his insides squirm with discomfort.

Soobin’s words barely registered when Yeonjun suddenly grabbed a couple of pieces off the pile and ran to the bed. “Hyung? What’s going on?”

“I—I just need to,” Yeonjun muttered in response, not able to formulate a better one since he couldn’t exactly explain it to himself what he was doing. “Just need to fix it.”

He stopped next to the bed, staring at it thoughtfully. What was the best way to make this new version of his creation? In a pile, similar to the old one? Or should he switch it up? Change it somehow?

After a handful of moments, he decided to place the pieces in a circle, leaving an empty spot in the middle of the bed. That would leave some space to enter it, and once that thought hit him, it instantly felt right. Yes, a circle was much better than a pile.

As he was working, Yeonjun’s vision tunnelled. All that existed in his world in that moment was the pile of clothes that needed to be moved, needed to be rebuilt into an even better version than before. Slowly but surely, it took place on the bed, and with every item that was moved, Yeonjun felt a little less floaty, a little less panicky.

Eventually, the only items left to place were the two shirts still clutched in Soobin’s hand. Without thinking, he reached out for them, only for Soobin to pull his hand back, out of his reach. Instantly, a high, dissatisfied whine escaped him, the sort of sound that he’d normally would be quite embarrassed to let out.

He met Soobin’s eyes for the first time in minutes, giving him a pleading look.

Yeonjun didn’t know if he had ever seen Soobin look so concerned before. It tickled a part of his brain, alerting him that something was wrong if Alpha was giving him that look, but it was easy to ignore that thought since he was so focused on getting those shirts back.

When he reached for them again, he let out another, perhaps even worse sounding whine. It seemed to do wonders, causing Soobin to instantly hold the shirts out for Yeonjun to grab and instantly run with to the bed.

The hum of Soobin’s voice behind his back piqued his interest. His voice was gentle and low in volume, almost as if he was talking to someone else. Yeonjun struggled to focus on anything but the creation beneath his hands, so the words being spoken behind him went in through one ear and out through the other.

“Hey, when are you coming over? Hyung’s being really weird, I don’t know what’s going on. He has this big pile of clothes, and I’m pretty sure not all of them are ours, like it’s yours and Tae’s. Kai’s too.” Pause. “Yeah, he got upset when I touched it, said something about it being ruined, and now he’s putting them all on the bed.” Pause. “What? I—I didn’t know that.” Pause. “Okay, sure. Do that. See you.”

Yeonjun patted his own shoulder as he stared down at the final result on the bed. It was finished, and it looked much better this time. He had outdone himself with this one.

“Hyung?”

Yeonjun turned, and there Soobin was, by his side. Perfect. Just the right timing.

“Soobin-ah,” Yeonjun answered, immediately reaching out for the alpha’s hands. When Soobin allowed him to grab them, Yeonjun smiled lovingly at him as he started pulling him closer. “Come. It’s finished.”

Soobin’s eyes were wide, but Yeonjun thought it must be because he was as in awe as Yeonjun himself. He wasn’t saying anything as Yeonjun stepped onto the bed and sat down, pulling on Soobin to get him to follow. It would have been nice to hear some praise from his alpha, maybe to be told that he had done a good job, but Yeonjun supposed Soobin must be speechless.

Once they were both seated, Yeonjun scooted closer to Soobin. There really was no need for there to be so much space between them. He made Soobin open his legs so he could get as close to him as possible, lifting Soobin’s arms to place them around his waist.

“Hyung, are you lucid?” Soobin asked, and Yeonjun was nearly about to whine when Soobin didn’t allow Yeonjun to pull him close enough to be chest to chest.

“Of course,” he answered without concern. He nuzzled closer to Soobin, satisfied when his nose touched Soobin’s neck. If only that stupid patch wasn’t there, blocking Soobin’s scent from him. He was starting to get real mad at its existence. “Why?”

One of Soobin’s hands disappeared from Yeonjun’s waist. Yeonjun wanted to complain, because he had been so comfortable, but when a hand touched his chin, lifting it, Yeonjun swallowed any noise about to come out. His gaze was forced to meet with Soobin’s. “Do you know what you’re doing right now?”

The eyes on him were careful, almost stern, but not in a scolding way. In a concerned way. Yeonjun felt quite lost in those eyes, unable to fully grasp why Soobin was looking at him like that.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re acting weird, but I don’t think you realize it.”

Yeonjun tilted his head to the side. “Weird?” He let the word sit there, in the air between them, before the meaning behind it settled. Instantly, his gaze fell to his creation around him, which was emitting the most amazing mix of their and their friends’ scents. His creation was… weird? Soobin thought it was wrong? Unsatisfactory? “You—you don’t like it?”

He felt himself start to shake before he realized how it felt to have Soobin’s rejection staring right into his face like that.

Quickly, before Yeonjun had time to retreat, Soobin corrected him. “No! That’s not what I meant!” He shook his head fast, hands reaching out to grab whatever part of Yeonjun he could reach just to give some comfort. “It’s just. Hyung, if you really think about it,” he continued, and Yeonjun could feel the intensity of his gaze on him like a burning candle on his skin, “do you even know why you gathered all these clothes and put them on the bed like this?”

With Soobin’s eyes so focused on him, Yeonjun couldn’t do anything but really think his words through. Did he know why he was doing it? Well, the answer was simple: he was doing it because he felt like he needed to. It felt good. Calming.

Although, if he thought harder on it, trying to see further than just the feeling, he came up blank. There was no explanation, only doing.

“I just…” Yeonjun broke off, and Soobin seemed to notice his struggle to come up with an answer.

“It’s called nesting, Hyung,” he explained, and the word sparked recognition in Yeonjun. A thumb suddenly started rubbing, back and forth, against the skin at his elbow, and it was all Yeonjun could focus on. “Beomgyu can probably explain it better than me, but it’s something omegas do when they’re, um, about to go into heat.”

“Heat?”

Well, that word he knew quite well. Beomgyu had made sure of it. As an omega, he was bound to experience it, so Beomgyu wanted him to be prepared. Yeonjun had been skeptical, barely believing that he was going to get heats at all, considering his status as a lab made omega.

But now, here he was, the threat of heat suddenly very real.

An involuntary shiver rippled down his back.

“It’s completely normal, Hyung,” Soobin said, continuing his incessant rubbing of Yeonjun’s elbow. “I—I know you haven’t experienced this before, but it’s nothing weird or—”

“You said I was weird, though,” Yeonjun found himself saying, as it all started getting too much all of a sudden. There was Soobin, sitting so close he was encasing Yeonjun, his eyes with this sweet yet intense look in them, and the damn thumb rubbing and rubbing and rubbing—

It all was a reminder that Yeonjun was losing control over the situation before him.

He swallowed, retreating his eyes from Soobin’s face so he could continue. “If it’s not wrong, if it’s all normal, then why did you say that I was being weird.”

“Hyung.” Soobin sounded confused again, and it made Yeonjun frustrated. Upset, almost. “I didn’t mean that, I—I just meant…” he fell quiet, mouth opening and closing, as if he was trying but failing to form the words. Yeonjun pulled his arms out of Soobin’s grip, the tiny clump in his chest growing as he started feeling even more like a freak.

“Jjunie-hyung,” Soobin pleaded. He held his hands in the air between them, as if wanting to reach out but not daring. “I just meant that you’ve never nested before, so I thought… I just thought you should know what was going on. I never meant to say that you are weird, in any way.”

As if Soobin had finally managed to find the right words, the unease Yeonjun was feeling suddenly dissipated. Soobin didn’t think he was weird. He hadn’t screwed it all up by acting too weird for an omega. It was still okay.

Yeonjun lifted his gaze, daring to look at Soobin again. At first, all he planned for was to meet Soobin’s eyes, but then he was struck by awe, pure awe at the unfiltered beauty that was staring right at him.

He let his eyes roam over Soobin’s face, uninhibited for once. Almost like in a trance, he couldn’t stop himself. Soobin’s hair was getting long, he noticed, and he was bound for a redye. Yet, he was pulling off the fading red color perfectly. His forehead was barely visible between his bangs, but it was smooth and open, the perfect spot to place a kiss, which Yeonjun almost never dared to do—only when he was drunk. His eyebrows, dark and well-kept, framing his face in a masculine way. His eyes, hooded and captivating, the look in them shining despite the worried tint in his gaze. His nose—oh gosh, his nose. His cute, button nose that Yeonjun could kiss and boop with his finger, anything to get the chance to touch it, really. His cheeks, so smooth and plump, sitting atop his perfect cheekbones, and hiding within them, his dimples—

“Hyung? Jjunie-hyung?”

Yeonjun swallowed thickly, realizing he’d gotten lost in his mental admiration of Soobin without realizing that Soobin was waiting for a response.

“Sorry.”

Startlingly, Soobin’s hand reached out to pinch Yeonjun’s cheek. “Where’s your head at, hm?”

I don’t know, he wanted to say. It was all so strange, how he felt mostly like himself, but at the same time, it felt like he didn’t have control over what he was doing. Least of all how he was feeling. His emotions were a jumble of distress and satisfaction, making it impossible for him to discern what feelings came from where and if his reaction was even realistic at all.

Soobin’s hand moved to suddenly cup his cheek, as if he was somehow sensing Yeonjun’s inner turmoil and wanted to ground him a little. No matter if that was intentional or not, it helped, and Yeonjun let out a tension filled sigh.

“Thanks, Soobin-ah.” Yeonjun smiled despite the distress inside him. Slowly, it was easing off, but there was a hint of sadness left in him that he couldn’t seem to fully shake.

In an effort to calm himself, he leaned forward and put his ear on Soobin’s chest, right over his heart. There, he closed his eyes and tried to just focus on Soobin. Soobin’s heart beating steadily in his chest, and Soobin’s hand gently carding through his hair.

Yeonjun didn’t know how much time passed with them sitting like that, but eventually their little bubble was broken as he heard a knock followed by the opening of the front door. Instinctively, Yeonjun pulled Soobin closer, though he was unsure whether it was to protect himself or Soobin from the intruder.

“It’s just Beomgyu,” Soobin explained, his voice gentle above him.

Slowly, Yeonjun lifted his head so that he could watch the visitor entering their space. Beomgyu came into the room in silence—an odd behaviour from him in Yeonjun’s eyes—carrying a paper bag that he placed on the sofa table.

“Hey,” Beomgyu said as soon as he locked eyes with them on the bed. His eyes quickly shifted to focus only on Yeonjun. “How are you feeling?”

Yeonjun released Soobin and leaned back to a fully sitting position. Still, his legs were basically on top of Soobin, and his hands were on Soobin as well. “I’m okay,” Yeonjun said with a shrug, despite how he kind of felt like there a fist clenched around his heart. He couldn’t explain where it came from, so he refrained from even trying to voice it.

“Just okay?” Beomgyu asked, his gaze suddenly piercing, making Yeonjun wonder if he had the power to see through him. The two of them stared at each other for nearly half a minute, until Yeonjun retreated his gaze and pouted sadly.

“Are you sure there’s nothing else?” Beomgyu persisted. “No negative feelings?”

Under Beomgyu’s watchful gaze, it was hard to keep his composure. With a sigh, Yeonjun gave in. “I guess… I feel a bit. Sad. I don’t know.”

“Ah, of course,” Beomgyu answered, the tone of his voice empathetic. Yeonjun lifted his gaze to watch him come closer, only to jerk in surprise when Beomgyu stopped to flick Soobin on the forehead. Hard, it seemed.

“Ow!” Soobin groaned in pain, grabbing the spot while pouting. “What was that for!?”

“You clearly don’t know how to care for an omega,” Beomgyu responded, before completely shifting his focus over to Yeonjun and his creation. “Your nest is so beautiful, Hyung. It’s really well-made; I can’t believe it’s your first time!”

A gasp escaped Yeonjun, and the grip around his heart loosened slightly. “Oh.” Despite himself, he fluttered his eyelashes, a smile and blush appearing on his face. “Thank you.”

Suddenly, Soobin jerked, letting out a startled, “yes! Of course, your nest looks amazing, Hyung.”

Embarrassingly, Yeonjun’s blush darkened as he dared to look at Soobin. Or, in normal circumstances he might have been embarrassed, but in that moment, Soobin’s words had him relaxing in such a way that any thought of embarrassment was blown out of his mind instantly.

“Really?”

“Yes,” Soobin said, meeting Yeonjun’s shy gaze with determination this time. “It’s perfect. And it smells so good.”

Yeonjun grinned, the discomfort inside him quickly settling into a satisfied feeling. “Thank you. I’m glad you like it.” He turned to Beomgyu, then, his heart swelling when he saw Beomgyu’s fond expression. With a hand reaching out for him he asked, “do you want to join us?”

Beomgyu’s face shifted, his mouth falling open. “In your nest?”

“Yes. Why, is that weird?”

Beomgyu and Soobin shared a look. “No, it’s just… the nest is supposed to be only for your pack. Not that packs are that much of a thing nowadays, but… still. Like, for the people closest to you.”

Yeonjun kept his hand exactly where it was, waiting for Beomgyu to take it. “Okay. So, will you join us?”

He didn’t know if the noise Beomgyu let out before he pretty much jumped on them was a wail of despair or happiness. To his ears it was a tearful sound, but judging by the way Beomgyu was cuddling them after, Yeonjun guessed it was caused by happy tears.

They sat there, cuddling and talking here and there for quite a while. Yeonjun would have been satisfied to continue doing so the rest of the evening – especially if he could manage to drag Taehyun and Kai into his nest as well when they arrived – if it wasn’t for the realization that he was indeed getting closer and closer to his heat.

“Ugh,” Yeonjun groaned, his eyes fluttering shut as a sharp jab of pain shot through his head. He hated headaches.

“Are you okay?” Soobin was instantly leaning over him, and when he touched Yeonjun’s forehead, a relieved sigh escaped the omega.

“Oh, that’s nice,” he mumbled.

“You’re burning up,” Soobin commented, turning his hand to feel with the other side as well.

“It’s the preheat,” Yeonjun heard Beomgyu say, and it had him instantly opening his eyes wide.  

He let out a mewl, pouting sadly up at Beomgyu.

The other omega reached out and petted him gently on the arm. “We have actually discussed this scenario, hyung,” he was saying, his voice very gentle and soothing, despite the fact that he was glancing helplessly at Soobin. “Like, we didn’t know if it was going to happen or not, but now that it’s here, it’s a bit sudden, don’t you think? And way too soon.”

Yeonjun had to agree with that. It had creeped up on him out of nowhere, and even now he was finding it hard to accept that what he was going through was… that. Preheat. His body getting prepared for heat, which he barely had any idea how to deal with.

“So,” Beomgyu continued carefully, talking slowly as if to make sure Yeonjun was following, “there’s actually this heat supressing shot you can get, which will basically subdue your hormones so you don’t have to go through it.”

“Huh?” Yeonjun glanced between the two of them, hopelessly confused.

“It’s just temporary,” Soobin jumped in to explain, though he didn’t exactly look happy to do so. “It’s basically postponing your heat, so you’ll have more time to get adjusted and prepare for it, now that we know you can get it.”

“Oh.” Yeonjun thought it through for a couple of seconds. It didn’t sound like a bad idea. There was just one thing he didn’t completely understand. “Um, is it really that bad? Heat, I mean?”

Beomgyu bit his lip thoughtfully. “I mean, it’s… manageable? But uh, usually the first heat is the worst, which is why we thought you might not want to go through it just yet. It’s, um,” he glanced nervously at Soobin for a moment before fixing his eyes somewhere on the bed not so far from Yeonjun’s head, “it also depends on if you spend it with a partner or not. But um, we can talk more about that… later.”

Yeonjun forced himself not to look at Soobin after hearing that. Don’t let that thought get into your head, he told himself, but it was to no avail.

“So, uh,” he started saying, “how do I get this… suppress shot?”

Beomgyu told him that he needed to call his doctor to get the shot, and since it was a Saturday night, the best option was probably to do it tomorrow.

“Preheat lasts a few days,” Beomgyu reassured him when he worried that tomorrow would be too late, and so Yeonjun let himself trust in his friend and relax despite how he was feeling off in his own body.

Not long thereafter, the maknaes arrived, and their little ‘pack’ as Beomgyu had inadvertently called it earlier was complete. Kai had been oblivious to what was going on with the whole ‘nest’ thing, but Taehyun instantly caught on. And when Yeonjun didn’t hesitate to invite the two of them into his nest as well (despite how fitting all five of them on the bed was a bit of a struggle), the youngest alpha looked the happiest Yeonjun had seen him in a long time.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The next day, Beomgyu woke up a near feverish Yeonjun, reminding him he had to make a phone call to his doctor. Yeonjun nearly refused, because it felt so nice to sleep in the nest with all 4 of his pack members, that he almost told Beomgyu he’d rather go through with the heat than get out of bed right that moment. It was only when he lifted his head and realize quite how dizzy he was—his head feeling like it was full of cotton—that he decided to do as Beomgyu was saying.

He had assumed it would be awkward to tell Doctor Lee that he was going into heat and needed a suppressor shot, but she was, as always, very easy to talk to. It helped that Beomgyu was by his side as he did it, holding his hand when saying the words out loud had been difficult.

She asked him to repeat what symptoms he was having, to ensure that it was preheat and nothing else.

It was only then that Yeonjun reflected on how he’d been feeling this week. “I’ve been nesting, apparently. Like, I didn’t know what it was, I was just acting on instinct and what felt right, but I’ve been doing it all week, and right now it’s super hard for me to leave the… nest. Like I get anxious. Uh, my appetite’s been terrible all week too. A little nauseous. Stuff like that.”

“And how are you feeling right now?” Doctor Lee asked.

“I’m okay. A bit… lightheaded, and that thing about the nest, I feel like I want to stay here all day. Need to, almost.” Beomgyu gestured towards his forehead, touching his own with the back of his palm, reminding Yeonjun that, “ah, and apparently, I’m pretty warm too. Not feverish I don’t think, at least not yet.”

“Okay, thank you, Yeonjun. I agree that it sounds like you’re in preheat.” The sound of papers ruffling filled the air between them for a couple of seconds. “Since we don’t know the onset of your heat, I think the best action would be for you to come in and get the shot as quickly as possible, if we want it to fully inhibit your heat.”

“Oh.” Yeonjun glanced at the door, where Soobin and the maknaes had left to buy them breakfast (and give the omegas some privacy during the call). “So, you mean like right now?”

“Yes, preferably. Do you think you can get yourself to the clinic safely?”

“I can call a cab and go with you,” Beomgyu told him, clearly having heard the doctor’s words.

“Yes,” Yeonjun relayed over to the Doctor. “My friend can take me.”

“Perfect. I’ll make a call and ensure you’re taken care of as soon as you reach the clinic.”

As the call ended, Yeonjun had to fight against the discomfort of leaving the nest. It was for his own best, sure, but knowing that didn’t exactly make it easier to go against his strong instincts.

“Here, hyung,” Beomgyu suddenly said, and when Yeonjun looked up he found the younger holding up a hoodie in front of him. Immediately, Yeonjun recognized it as Soobin’s, a hoodie he’d added to the pile early on. Just from a small sniff, he could tell that sometime during the night, the hoodie had been infused with the scent of all five of them.

Without realizing it, he let out a gasp and pulled the hoodie into his arms. It smelled like his nest. Perfect.

After putting the hoodie on, leaving his place on the bed was effortless. It was like he was walking around with his nest right there. He followed Beomgyu downstairs, trusting the other omega to inform their friends about the situation, and not realizing until they were outside that he’d forgotten his phone in the apartment.

With a head full of cotton, Yeonjun was about to tell Beomgyu, but the thought blew away with the wind as soon as the cab pulled up and Beomgyu ushered him inside. The ride to the hospital was quick, thankfully. The longer time went by, the more uneasy Yeonjun was feeling. He couldn’t pinpoint where the feeling was coming from, only that it grew the further away from home they got.

The nausea was back in full as well, hitting him straight on when they walked into the hospital and passed the entrance café, the smell of baked goods stronger than ever. It was all he could do to keep the content of his stomach down, his hand reaching out to grab onto the hem of Beomgyu’s jacket to steady himself.

“You okay?” Beomgyu asked, slowing down to look at him closely.

“I—” realization hit him then. “I forgot my phone. And my wallet—I don’t have my ID, we have to go back—”

“Hyung,” Beomgyu placed his hand on top of Yeonjun’s where it was grasping the jacket, “I brought your stuff, it’s fine. We just have to go in, talk to a nurse, and then you’ll get the shot.”

Yeonjun hesitated. “You sure?”

“I’m sure. It’ll be quick, I promise.”

Lip wobbling, Yeonjun nodded. Okay. It was okay. He was okay, or, he would be, at least. It would be quick. It would be fine. He trusted Beomgyu. It would all be fine.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

”So…”

Soobin jerked, his head snapping to the side to find Taehyun suddenly by his side. He hadn’t heard him coming up, had been so in his head that he’d turned completely dead to the world for a moment.

They were at a bakery, having come there with the intention to bring fresh bread home for breakfast. By the counter was Kai, still looking over their options and asking the cashier for suggestions, while the two of them were standing some steps away.

Soobin had been excited when they entered, the prospect of caring for his omega together with the smell of one of his favourite foods bringing his mood up. They’d been in queue for all but five minutes before the text from Beomgyu had come, explaining the situation. He was taking Yeonjun to the hospital. They didn’t need to bring breakfast home.

It was at that point Soobin had retreated to the window, quickly getting lost in his own head.

Taehyun nudged him, once again pulling him out of his thoughts. “You seem on edge. Does it perhaps have anything to do with Yeonjun’s preheat…?”

“I—”

Was he on edge? Honestly, he’d felt a bit disconnected ever since yesterday, when he’d finally figured out why Yeonjun had been acting differently. Before that, he hadn’t thought much about it, had only noticed a few things here and there. But Yeonjun was good at hiding stuff, he knew that, so most likely he had missed all the obvious signs because of that.

Still, it bugged him that he hadn’t realized. The moment he did, though, his instincts went haywire. It was a good thing Yeonjun’s scent wasn’t out on full display, or it might have triggered his upcoming rut early. Which would have been a disaster. The mere thought of losing control like that in front of Yeonjun—because of Yeonjun, that was… he couldn’t even put it into words.

The three of them—him, Taehyun, and Beomgyu—had discussed what they should do if Yeonjun’s heat came upon them. They hadn’t known if it would, but Beomgyu had argued that it was good to be prepared. Soobin had been reluctant to discuss it without Yeonjun’s presence, since it was his body it regarded, but maybe it had been for the best. They knew the way mating cycles went, the way they felt, and even if they could’ve tried to explain it to Yeonjun, it was debatable whether he would fully understand it before it happened to him.

Despite having discussed it, Soobin couldn’t really say that he himself was prepared for it. Not for Yeonjun’s heat. Nor the sudden dismissal of his heat. He’d barely had time to adjust to the situation, to fully grasp that it was actually happening, before everything changed again.

Soobin had known that Yeonjun was likely going to get the shot, and that his heat would be postponed. It was the best course of action, he had agreed on that, because he could tell that Yeonjun wasn’t ready for it yet. But still. His instincts were screaming at him for allowing his omega to do that to himself. Screaming at him for not taking care of his omega, for letting him go out in public and go to a doctor that would inject him with something foreign, something that would cause harm to his body.

Soobin shook his head. His instincts were stupid. The shot would not harm Yeonjun, it would help him. It would prevent him from having to go through one of the worst aspects of being a werewolf.

Soobin knew that Yeonjun wasn’t ready because Yeonjun had only recently started to accept his bodily changes. Even if Yeonjun never spoke about it (to him, at least, who knew what he and Beomgyu were talking about though), Soobin could read him like a book. The way he hesitated to look at his reflection, the way he hugged himself when someone looked at him for a little too long, or the way he refused to wear any of his old, tight fitted clothes. Soobin knew. He knew that if Yeonjun had to go through a heat right now, it would freak him out. It would erase all his progress.

Taehyun tapped him on the hand, pulling his attention back to the presence. “That bad, huh?” he asked, and Soobin realized he must’ve spaced out quite a lot for Taehyun to give him such a knowing smirk.

“It’s… weird. I’ve never had problems with my instincts before but this… it’s like a constant feeling of wrongness. Like there are alarm bells in my head, warning me that I shouldn’t have let him go. Have you ever experienced something like that?”

“No,” Taehyun said, pursing his mouth. As an alpha himself, Soobin hoped for some input from Taehyun. “But I’ve heard of it. Seen it.” He gave Soobin a long look. “Only in mated couples, though.”

Soobin swallowed. Well. In a way, that didn’t really surprise him. He’d always been a little possessive over Yeonjun, always wanted to be by his side and hated when anyone else was there, even back in the days before he realized his feelings. The only change caused by Yeonjun being an omega was that now it wasn’t just his rational, human mind that was seeing Yeonjun as a potential partner, but also his animal, instinctual side. And that side of him was much less inclined to listen to reason.

“It’s not bad, Soobin-hyung,” Taehyun said, locking his arm with Soobin’s now to give some reassurance. “You love him.”

“Yeah, but having my instincts acting like we’re already mated is starting to give me problems,” Soobin answered, throat tightening. “What if I hurt him, somehow, because I get jealous or I act without thinking and—”

“We both know that there’s not a universe out there where you would ever intentionally hurt Yeonjun-hyung,” Taehyun said, stopping him from spiralling any further.

“Then what if it’s unintentional? I hate feeling like this, like… like I’m unstable. It’s alpha space all over again.”

“If it’s an accident, he’ll understand,” Taehyun said. He pushed a finger into Soobin’s arm teasingly. “I kinda want to see you lose control, though. You’re always so collected. I can’t imagine you could ever lose it so much that you didn’t know what you were doing.”

Soobin gave him a stunned look. “I think you’ve been hanging out way too much with Beomgyu lately,” he concluded, shaking his head when Taehyun let out a laugh that somehow only made him resemble Beomgyu even more.

“Taehyun, some help?” Kai called suddenly, and they both turned to see him carrying two trays stacked with their food and drinks. Taehyun rushed to his side to help him, while Soobin was left to look around for anywhere to sit.

They found a table close to the door, where the cool spring air was trickling in whenever someone entered.

“So,” Kai said, biting into the scone he’d bought for himself and chewing for a few seconds before continuing, “are suppressant shots a thing for alphas too? Do you get them so you don’t have to go through it?”

Kai was cute. In contrast to Yeonjun, who had grown up next to them and never really saw a reason to ask, Kai had gotten to know them only a few years ago, and his curiosity was never ending.

“We can get them, yes,” Taehyun answered, “but it’s less effective for alphas. Like it… it suppresses the, you know, horniness,” here, Taehyun glanced at Soobin, obviously trying for being casual about it when Soobin knew he was embarrassed to talk about it, “but everything else is the same. So, at least for me, I prefer just going through it all natural. It’s over in a few days, anyways.”

“What’s that mean, everything else?” Kai asked.

“Kinda like… restlessness. Irritability. Being really close to anger.”

“Possessiveness,” Soobin added. There were more words running around in his head, all of them negative. Self-deprecating. Probably not something he should let slip out, unless he wanted to completely ruin the mood.  “It’s nothing fun. And rut suppressants are not as regulated or tested as heat suppressants, so most doctors suggest going without them anyways.”

“Really?” Kai’s eyes were big. “But heat suppressants are okay? It’ll be safe for Hyung, right?”

Taehyun nodded, then another mischievous smirk spread on his face. “Soobin wouldn’t have let him get it if it wasn’t.”

Kai nodded, as if that made perfect sense. “’Course not.” He took a sip from his hot chocolate, and Soobin automatically followed the motion with his eyes. “I wonder how it feels, though. Will it have effect immediately?”

It seemed like Taehyun started to answer, but Soobin couldn’t hear it. Thoughts bounced around in his head loudly, almost like words spoken to him. Kai’s words were in the centre of it all.

I wonder how it feels.

Uneasiness spread through him. Not knowing how Yeonjun felt made him anxious. What if Yeonjun didn’t feel happy about it? What if the shot made him sick, despite Beomgyu’s reassurances that it should be completely safe. What if suppressing his first heat like that would cause permanent damage because his body hadn’t fully adjusted and needed to go through with it to—

Soobin pulled out his phone. He was going to call Yeonjun. No, he was going to call Beomgyu. To tell him to stop Yeonjun from getting the shot. He couldn’t let it happen. He couldn’t.

“Hyung?”

Soobin blinked, eyes focusing back on his friends sitting in front of him with watchful eyes. Reluctantly, he answered, “yeah?”

“You okay?”

He looked down at the phone in his hand and was hit with reality. What was he doing?

Quickly, he pocketed the phone and nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.”

“You should eat, your bread must be cold already,” Taehyun said, eyes flitting down to the untouched bun on his plate. “You know Yeonjun’s hyung is gonna be fine, right? It’s just a heat suppressing shot, not a life-threatening surgery.”

Pouting, Soobin rolled his eyes. “Tell that to my stupid instincts,” he muttered, grabbing his knife and stabbing it into the round piece of bread, starting to cut it in half.

It was impossible to stop the possessive thoughts from running wild. His omega was in a compromised position, and he wasn’t by his side to take care of him. Fuck, he should’ve gone with him. Why didn’t he think of that? Why did he let Beomgyu be the one to stay with Yeonjun? It was his omega that was going through preheat so it should be him that helped to take care of him.

“I should be with him.” Soobin looked up, surprised by his own words that had slipped out without preamble. Taehyun was giving him a soft look, rolling his eyes. Kai, by his side, was smiling in amusement. There was something about the look in his eyes, as if he knew the meaning behind Soobin’s words.

Suddenly, like a light bulb going off above his head, Soobin understood. “You… you know, don’t you?” He blinked rapidly, turning his gaze on Taehyun. “Did you tell him?”

“Know what?” Kai asked.

“About—that… that I’m…” Soobin’s mouthed opened and closed. He hadn’t been prepared to say it, and now he was completely dumbfounded by the surprised look on Kai’s face.

The human watched him struggle, his expression thoughtful and calculating, until it suddenly changed, and Soobin knew he had figured it out. “Oh! You mean that you’re in love with Yeonjun-hyung?” Kai looked between him and Taehyun for a moment. “What, I thought that was common knowledge?”

“What?” Soobin gaped.

“What what?” Kai asked back. “Was I not supposed to know that? Just because you never said it out loud doesn’t mean it’s not obvious, hyung.” He directed his next question to Taehyun. “You knew, right?”

“I… did,” Taehyun said, and judging by how slowly he got the words out, he must’ve been just as surprised as Soobin was feeling.

“See!” Kai exclaimed, as if that was proving his point.

“That’s just ‘cause I told him,” Soobin countered with a frown. If Kai knew, and he thought it was something that everyone knew, just how obvious did that mean that Soobin was?

“You did?” Kai suddenly looked put off. “Hey! You’d tell him and not me? Am I not your best friend too?”

“I…” Soobin’s eyes widened. “I didn’t mean to keep it from you, I—”

“To be honest,” Taehyun jumped in, “he told me in a moment of weakness. If that hadn’t happened, he probably would have kept it from both of us until now.”

Soobin scowled at that, but he refrained from responding since… in all honesty, Taehyun was probably right.

“Okay,” Kai said, sighing. “I’m not that mad about it because you’re emotionally repressed, we been knew.” Kai’s words pulled a laugh out of Taehyun, whilst Soobin just rolled his eyes in response. “I assume Beomgyu knows too, then? It’s only Yeonjun who doesn’t know?”

They both looked to him for the answer. “Yeah, Beomgyu knows.”

Kai nodded, taking another swig of his chocolate. “So, now that it’s established that we all know… am I allowed to ask? Or do you want me to continue pretending like I don’t know?” Soobin just sighed, and Kai took that as affirmation. “Yay! Okay, so, are you planning to confess?”

Straight to the point. Very effective, Soobin had to give that to him.

Also very annoying.

Should he tell them? About his conversation with his parents, and their suggestion that he show his interest to Yeonjun by courting. Should he then also tell them about how he had secretly been buying lots of stuff that could be a potential courting gift to Yeonjun, only he had been too chicken to go all the way and actually give it to him?

He thought Kai’s words through. Maybe he really was emotionally repressed. Maybe that was the whole issue here. Why should talking to his best friends about his feelings be such a scary thing?

So, he landed on just telling them everything. And for once, he felt the heaviness on his heart lessen, as the burden of keeping it all to himself slowly eased off him.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The whole hospital visit was… unpleasant, to say the least. But just like Beomgyu had promised, it had been quick. Doctor Lee had called ahead and explained about his trauma and aversion to hospitals, so right after signing in, they’d been ushered into a room and taken care of by a nice nurse. The whole ordeal had been over in a couple of minutes, and he’d walked out of there on unsteady feet, arm in arm with Beomgyu.

To his surprise, Beomgyu didn’t drag him into a cab and back home instantly—instead, he insisted that he treat Yeonjun to something sweet at the first café they found outside the hospital.

“You just got the suppressant shot, you should sit down and relax,” Beomgyu insisted, pulling on Yeonjun’s arm until they were walking in through the doors, entering the warm atmosphere. This time, the smell of buns didn’t make Yeonjun’s stomach turn, but he was also not entirely back to normal just yet, so it didn’t give him any pleasure either.

Beomgyu sat him down at a cosy couch seat in the corner, before leaving to order for them both. Yeonjun felt strange sitting there, waiting to be served. He wasn’t used to this treatment. He was the older one here, shouldn’t he be the one paying?

But at the same time, he was not at his best. He was still feeling quite off after the shot. Like his body was only slowly starting to get the memo, and the adjustment to whatever was in that shot required a lot of energy to perform.

He still didn’t have his phone, so he ended up playing with the candle holder from the table, passing it between his hands absentmindedly, until Beomgyu suddenly came back.

“Here,” he said, placing a large cup of steaming hot chocolate in front of him. It smelled of spices that Yeonjun recognized and loved. As he he took a careful sip of it, he was surprised that it was fitted perfectly to his taste.

An unexpected surge of emotions took over him, and he rushed from his seat before Beomgyu could sit down and pushed his face into Beomgyu’s neck, embracing him without hesitation.

“What’s this?” Beomgyu let out an amused laugh. His arms lifted to hug him back, and from this close Yeonjun could feel how his scent shifted into something he interpreted as contentment.

“I don’t know,” Yeonjun admitted, mumbling next to Beomgyu’s head, “I just wanted to thank you. I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me.”

He could feel rather than see Beomgyu’s grin growing in response to that. “Is this the hormones talking?” He chuckled, squeezing Yeonjun a little before leaning back so he could look at his face. “Well, you don’t have to thank me. Even if we didn’t exactly like each other in the beginning, I’m glad we could become friends. And, you know, I have to admit that I’ve enjoyed being your teacher. This has been a once in a lifetime type of thing, for you, sure, but for me too!”

The cheeky grin on his face made Yeonjun laugh. “You’re so…” he struggled with how to put a word to Beomgyu’s antics.

“Amazing?” Beomgyu filled in. “Generous? Kind? Incredibly beautiful and the best omega you’ve ever met?”

Ending the embrace, Yeonjun laughed again. “I think I meant to say ‘annoying’.”

They both took their seats. “Nope, I’m pretty sure you were going to say all those nice words about me.”

In a way, Beomgyu was right. Even if Yeonjun couldn’t exactly put it into words, he appreciated Beomgyu. So much. Not just for what he had done for him today, but for everything he’d done for him, since the day of his escape.

And even if he would never want to go through all of it again, he would always treasure the fact that it gave him a reason to get close with Beomgyu.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

Chapter Text

Soobin was stressed out. He was so fucking stressed . More stressed than he’d been during his last exam period, which was saying a lot. Why had he let himself get talked into actually going through with this?

“You already bought the stuff, so you should just give it to him!” Taehyun had said.

“Hyung’s going to love anything you give him!” Kai had said.

And Soobin had listened to it. He’d promised them that he was going to do it.

Now here he was.

Several days had passed, and it was now Friday. He was pacing nervously back and forth, back and forth, along the short distance between the bedroom and the kitchen of Yeonjun’s apartment. Yeonjun wasn’t even there; he’d sent a text earlier, saying he would pass by his dance studio to talk to his boss about something. Later, they had plans to go out with the boys, but that was still hours away. 

Now, Soobin knew that he was blowing it all out of proportions. There was no need to panic this much about giving Yeonjun a courting gift. It was not the end of the world.

He just… couldn’t get his heart to understand that.

Normally, he didn’t have to think twice about talking to Yeonjun because they knew each other in and out but… when his nerves were acting up, he suddenly turned into a stuttering mess. He hated it, but he couldn’t do much to change it. 

Usually, he would usually avoid getting into situations like this by just not opening his mouth. In cases where he found himself flustered, he’d pretend that he found it funny, or that he was just embarrassed, so that no one would notice that he just could not physically make his mouth form any coherent words.

This time, he wouldn’t get away with staying quiet, though, because he would be faced with Yeonjun, alone. Shutting his mouth and not saying a thing would only make it all seem weirder.

Though, opening his mouth and saying a bunch of weird nonsense would also make the situation awkward.

“Arghhh!” He sat down heavily on the nearest chair and grabbed his face in his hands, groaning loudly into the empty room.

Deep down, he knew that this shouldn’t be a big deal, if he looked at it objectively. He was just giving Yeonjun a gift. He’d done so many times before without a struggle. He wasn’t even worried that Yeonjun wouldn’t like his gift; no, he was almost certain he would love it. He’d specifically chosen it because it screamed Yeonjun.

The cause of his nervous breakdown was simply the prospect of Yeonjun figuring out the intent behind the gift.

His mom’s words about courting repeated in his head. That the whole purpose of courting was to show your interest, to make the other person aware , and to get them to like you back. So, in that sense, he should want Yeonjun to figure it out. Because he wanted Yeonjun to know how he felt, and he wanted him to feel the same towards him.

Ultimately, he wanted that. But the process of getting there, of confessing his feelings to Yeonjun, of making himself vulnerable like this for the first time in his life… the thought terrified him. It felt like he was going to hand over his beating heart to his hyung while hoping that he would not crush it before handing it back. It didn’t matter how much he trusted Yeonjun, nor that he knew that Yeonjun would never hurt him. In the face of fear, nothing seemed to matter at all.

Lifting his head, he stared at the wrapped item, which he had placed on top of the newly made bed. Maybe he shouldn’t have wrapped it. Would that make it seem weirder?

Getting to his feet, he crossed the room and picked the package up. Put it back down. Picked it up again just to turn it around, trying to place it in the perfect way.

Maybe he was too nervous to be doing this.

But… he had promised. Not only his friends and his parents, but also himself. If he didn’t do this, how could he say that he wanted Yeonjun to be his mate? If he wanted to have a chance, he couldn’t be waiting around doing nothing forever.

He turned on the tv in an attempt to distract himself. It barely helped; he kept glancing at his phone, checking for messages indicating when Yeonjun was coming home.

He hoped the gift was good enough. Since he’d bought several, he’d had to settle on one (for starters), and for that he had let Kai and Taehyun help him choose. In their opinion, this was the best one to start with. A smooth start, they’d said. He hoped they were right.

After an unknown amount of time—that Soobin couldn’t for the life of him say how long it was—had passed, the sudden sound of his phone ringing startled him so bad he nearly fell off the couch.

A sense of dread crept up on him as he dared look at the phone, before he realized that it wasn’t Yeonjun, but his classmate Changmin that was calling. After a quick breath to calm himself, he answered.

“ Hey Soobin ,” Changmin answered in a clearly urgent tone. “ How well do you know Microsoft excel? ”

“Excel?” Soobin wondered. “I mean, better than the average human being, probably, but I’m no expert.”

“ Okay, so I think I fucked something up and overwrote all my data and I don’t know if that means I just destroyed my whole project or if there’s a way to fix it, but I am kind of really worried right now. Please, could you help me? Pleeeeeaaaseee.”

“Oh, shit.” Soobin looked at the gift next to him, then to the clock. It was only ten past five, and they weren’t meeting the guys until eight. Yeonjun hadn’t said anything about the time, nor had he sent any other messages since earlier. It could take hours before he came home. “Okay, yeah sure, I can take a look at it. Are you still in school?”

After a long string of thank you’s, Changmin explained that he was at the school library, which was closing in 50 minutes. To make it in time to help him, Soobin would have to get on the next bus.

So, when the call ended, he got ready to leave immediately. Leaving no space to think things through. It was only as he was tying his shoes on that he looked over at the gift, lying so prettily exactly where he’d left it.

Should he hide it and give it to Yeonjun at another time? Or should he bring it with him to the library? What if he lost it on the way, or if he dropped it and it got somehow dirty and it wouldn’t be suitable to give to Yeonjun anymore and–

Perhaps leaving it out for Yeonjun to find it on his own would be the best way to go for Soobin’s poor heart. Then maybe, if he liked it, Yeonjun would even choose to wear it as they went out tonight. He really hoped so. The picture of Yeonjun showing up in his gift cemented the decision in his mind.

Before leaving, he ran to find a piece of paper to write on. He scribbled down a note for Yeonjun that he then placed on the bed next to the gift, then turning on his heel and bolting out of there.

Leaving the apartment, he felt a mix of relief and dread for how he had chosen to deal with his first courting gift.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The instant he got home, Yeonjun was ready to crash in bed. Just a short nap before it was time to get ready, and he’d be fine. He’d visited his dance studio because he was missing it like crazy, and had ended up being dragged into a two hour class with the highest level students. The students all recognized him and hyped him up, but that didn’t help the way he’d lost all his stamina and muscles in the last few months.

I really have to get back in shape for next semester , he thought to himself as he dropped his bag on the floor just inside the door, kicking his shoes off quickly. He knew he shouldn’t be sloppy like this now that he didn’t live alone, but seriously, Soobin was much messier than him, so he wasn’t allowed to complain.

“Bin-ah?” He called as he stepped inside, realizing a second later that he hadn’t seen Soobin’s shoes when he walked in. Was he out? That was odd, Soobin had said he’d go straight home after school, and that they’d get ready together before leaving.

Checking the kitchen, he wondered out loud to himself, “did he eat yet?” There didn’t seem to be any dirty plates lying around. “Maybe he went out to buy food?”

Humming the song they’d danced to, Yeonjun moved deeper into the apartment, thinking he should just get out of his wet sweaty clothes while waiting for Soobin. Maybe he should text him, though? Just to see when he was planning to get home—

The sight of an unexpected shape on his bed made him stop abruptly, staring at it. It was large, a wrapped object with a note on top of it.

Looking around, he wondered for a moment if he was being pranked. What was this? But Soobin couldn’t be around, couldn’t be hiding somewhere ready to sneak up on him, because Yeonjun was sure his sensitive ears would pick up his breathing if he was somewhere in the apartment.

Another two steps, and he was standing right over it. The note was facing down, so he gently picked it up and turned it over.

Yeonjun-hyung, it read. I saw this and thought of you, so I had to buy it. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to give it to you, changmin had an emergency and asked me for help, so I’ll be back later. I hope you like it <3

Your Binnie

Your Binnie. A shiver ran down his spine, an obvious sign of how much he liked the sound of that.

Soobin had bought something for him just because it had made him think of him? That was… wow. It made him all giddy inside, without even knowing what the gift was.

With careful but eager hands, Yeonjun ripped open the paper wrapping and pulled the item out.

He felt soft fabric in his hands before he saw it. Next, a whiff of something strong and familiar hit him.

For a handful of seconds, Soobin’s scent was everywhere. It was all-consuming. Despite how much he’d tried to get used to it lately, at that moment, he felt like he hadn’t made any progress at all.

Swallowing, he finally dragged his eyes over the item in his hands, realizing it was a cardigan. A fluffy, black and white, check patterned cardigan, so soft to the touch that he could immediately see himself living in it.

It was perfect.

When he put it on, Soobin’s scent had a suddenly calming effect on him. It felt almost as if Soobin was right there, hugging him and keeping him warm, making him feel safe. 

He spent maybe five minutes (maybe longer) just standing there, basking in Soobin’s scent and this incredible feeling. Then, after his initial rush of endorphins or whatever was going on, he stumbled his way over to the nearest mirror.

For the first time in months, Yeonjun felt confident and happy looking at himself in the mirror. This simple clothing item, a soft, fluffy cardigan, was somehow shielding him from his own cold and judgeful eyes. Instead of seeing everything wrong, everything different with his body, he could only see everything being prettily accentuated by the cardigan. 

If he thought about it a little too closely, he knew he would find it absolutely insane that an item with Soobin’s potent scent on it could change his view of himself so shockingly. And likely, once the scent faded and he was left with a cold, stale smelling cardigan, his thoughts would likely retort back to their previous state. 

Well, maybe so. Maybe he’d feel even more depressed and self-deprecating once reality settled in and his brain caught up to the fact that Soobin still wasn’t his, and even if he’d shared an item with his scent on, it didn’t necessarily mean anything. 

In an attempt to not think, Yeonjun pulled out his phone and resorted to a short little selfie session where he snapped pictures of himself from every angle just so that he could immortalize this moment. He tried to ignore how easy it was to notice how he’d let himself go lately, how his cheeks were still hollowed out, the color of his skin still dull, and the length of his hair longer than he’d ever let it be before. 

He touched his hair self-consciously, fluffing it up and inevitably taking himself back to a moment a few weeks ago, when Soobin had come home during one of Yeonjun’s worst moments. 

It had been one of those days where he’d felt off since the moment he woke up, but still forced himself to be okay and to go to school and smile and act like he wasn’t a broken teacup held together by disintegrating glue. He had expected Soobin to come home late, or maybe even the next day considering he was visiting his parents again, and thus he hadn’t even tried to put a stop to his spiraling thoughts.

Someone had commented on the way he walked. Another had exclaimed that his hair was nearly as long as the girls’ in their class. A third had simply asked if he was getting enough sleep, because he looked tired. 

On a good day, he would have taken it lightheartedly.  Before , he wouldn’t have cared, would have only seen it as innocent comments. But now, now that looking in the mirror was a big reminder of the shit that had been done to him, he couldn’t take it, especially not that day. 

So, once he got home, he’d completely crashed out. 

Soobin had caught him at the end of it. Afterwards, Yeonjun barely remembered what he’d been doing, but Soobin said he’d caught him with a pair of scissors, mumbling to himself about everything being ‘wrong’. 

What was the most memorable to Yeonjun to this day was what Soobin had said after he’d managed to pull some kind of explanation out of him. 

“I love your hair. Not because it’s long, or because it was short before, but because it is part of you. It’s a part of your identity, of how you hold yourself, so of course I love it.” He had carded a hand through Yeonjun’s hair at this point, and the genuine awe in his eyes as he studied his own hands moving between Yeonjun’s strands had hit Yeonjun square in the chest, making him breathless. “Even so, it doesn’t make or break you,” Soobin had continued. “In the end, it’s just hair. Still, I think you look extra hot with long hair.”

Then Soobin had blushed and joked about his own words being cheesy, but he’d also looked proud to have finally made Yeonjun smile again. 

Now, Yeonjun touched his still long hair, and smiled in appreciation. He wondered if Soobin knew how much everything he did, everything he said , stayed with Yeonjun. Soobin was careful with his words, especially when it came to compliments, but lately he’d been a bit more open with them. Maybe it was all an effect of Yeonjun’s trauma, a secondary response of the person closest to him in trying to deal with everything that was going on, everything that had happened. 

After an almost ridiculous number of selfies, Yeonjun crawled onto their bed and bundled up under a blanket, getting comfortable and relaxed with Soobin’s scent all around him. Closing his eyes, he could almost pretend like the pillow under his head was actually Soobin’s chest, and that the strong scent was caused by the proximity to his alpha. 

He stayed like that for three minutes before reality came rushing in, and the feeling of missing his best friend punched him in the gut. Quickly, he pulled his phone out and sent a message quickly. 

Yeonjun

Soobinnie when are you coming home? TT

Alsooooo I found your gift

It’s so pretty, i absolutely love it <3333 thank you!!! <333333

It took 8 minutes before Soobin finally responded. 

Soobin

You like it?😚

I’m still with changmin, we were kicked out of the library but he still needs help so we’re sitting at a bench outside trying to figure his stuff out before his computer dies

Yeonjun

OF COURSE I LIKE IT <333 It’s literally perfect wth???

oh damn, okay. will you make it home before 8?

Yeonjun checked the time. It was half past six already.

Soobin

I’m glad you like it<3 

and no probably not :/ but i can meet you guys there

Yeonjun

okay let’s do that. You want me to bring anything for you?

Soobin responded saying he didn’t really need anything, considering they were only going out for drinks and games.

That left Yeonjun with about an hour of time to get ready, all by himself. There wasn’t really any need for him to doll himself up much, considering they were just going to hang out the five of them in their own booth, so he spent most of that time enjoying himself wearing Soobin’s present. 

When it was nearing the time to go, Yeonjun found himself at odds. The question was whether he should wear the sweater out or not. On one hand, wearing it meant displaying to everyone around him that his alp– his best friend had gone out of his way to give this perfect item to him. It would mean wearing Soobin’s scent while being out in public, showing it off as if it was something belonging to the alpha (as if he belonged to the alpha), even if that wasn’t Soobin’s intention.

Thinking about it, Yeonjun had decided that Soobin couldn’t have known he was leaving his scent on the sweater. Soobin, who hadn’t gone a day without scent blockers since Yeonjun’s return, wasn’t one to flounder his scent around, and thus it didn’t make sense for him to hand over an item smelling like him and intending for Yeonjun to wear it while smelling like him. Maybe he’d tried it on in the dressing room and accidentally left his scent on it? But intentional or not, Yeonjun still treasured it immensely. 

On the other hand, wearing the sweater out meant the scent would fade faster. Yeonjun didn’t want that. Sure, he had all of Soobin’s hoodies lying around the apartment also smelling like him, but none of them were as potent as this sweater. With how much Soobin was blocking out his scent with the blockers lately, not much lingered on his clothes unless he was wearing them straight out of the shower and to bed while forgetting to put on new blockers, which basically never happened. So, this sweater was special, and… maybe Yeonjun wanted to treasure it for a bit more in private. For now. 

So, he ended up changing at the last minute, putting on a silky dress shirt instead. 

He sent a text his friends’ way once he was on his way, and ended up arriving at the same time as the youngest. They went inside to grab their table, and then, the moment the waitress had left them, Yeonjun quickly pulled out his phone. 

“Look at what Soobin gave me!” he said, shoving the phone displaying one of his mirror selfies in Kai’s face. He watched Kai’s face, grinning as he explained more. “He wrapped it and everything, and left it for me to find when I came home. He said he thought of me when he saw it in the store.”

“Damn, hyung,” Kai said, whooping as he picked up the phone himself. “It looks great on you! Soobin-hyung really knows what looks good on you.”

Yeonjun gave him a pleased smile. “He does, doesn’t he? Isn’t it so considerate of him? Like, there was no reason to get me anything, but he saw this when he was out and thought of me, so he bought it.”

Kai raised his eyebrows in thought. “So you don’t think he bought it for you with intention?

“What do you mean?” Yeonjun wondered, tilting his head in confusion. “He said he saw it and bought it because it made him think of me.”

“Yeah, that’s what he said .” Kai wiggled his eyebrows, and Yeonjun pursed his mouth thoughtfully. 

He wondered about Kai’s words, but quickly got sidetracked when they were joined by Beomgyu and Taehyun–once again arriving together, Yeonjun had to ask Taehyun what was going on there–and the omega immediately started discussing what game they were gonna play first. 

Beomgyu had been the one to suggest going to this bar, where they got their own booth equipped with its own tv and game console of their choosing. Taehyun had been skeptical at first, arguing that they could just as much play games and drink at home, considering he wasn’t very fond of places full of drunk people, but Beomgyu had somehow managed to convince him. 

As they were waiting for Soobin, Yeonjun offered to order the drinks for the five of them. He went up to the bar and hung around there until he caught the bartender’s attention. 

“Hi there cutie.” Yeonjun turned his head just in time to see a man slide into the spot right next to him, leaning against the counter so that his full attention was on Yeonjun. 

Yeonjun ran his eyes up and down the guy, taking in his broad shoulders and handsome face very objectively. “Hello,” he answered, just to be polite.

“What’s a little omega like you doing here all by yourself?”

Yeonjun’s polite expression fell in an instant. “Excuse me?”

“Well,” the guy said, leaning even closer now, and a moment later Yeonjun was hit by his strong pheromones that nearly made him choke. He smelled like something burnt mixed with something musky, which clashed terribly with Yeonjun’s nose. “I couldn’t help but notice the way you were all alone over here. You’re unmated, aren’t you?” His eyes scanned over Yeonjun’s exposed neck, and seemed satisfied with what he found. 

“I’m not here alone, actually,” Yeonjun said, looking over his shoulder to where the guys were sitting, seemingly still arguing over what game to choose. “Actually I–”

Just as Yeonjun turned his head back to let the guy know he wasn’t interested, he jerked when he felt an unexpectedly strong touch by his neck. 

“Hey!” Yeonjun slapped the man’s arm away, but the damage had been done. He must’ve rubbed his scent gland against Yeonjun’s skin, because now his smell was everywhere.

“I don’t smell any alpha’s claim on you,” the man continued, and Yeonjun thought he must be stupid to not notice how he was reacting. “Let me buy you a drink, and I can take you back to my table–”

Yeonjun wasn’t taking it a second longer. “Fuck off,” he told the guy, and moved several steps down the bar to call for the bartender. Thankfully, he caught his attention quickly, and managed to ask him to send their drinks over to their table when they were done. The bartender gave him a confused look, but when he nodded in the direction of the alpha he seemed to understand, and gave a nod. Only when taking a deep breath after that did Yeonjun realize that the bartender was an omega as well. 

To his great relief, the alpha seemed to take the hint and didn’t stick around, so Yeonjun could make his way back to the table in peace. He saw Taehyun raising his eyebrows at him when he returned empty handed, but just shrugged, not feeling like getting into it. 

The others seemed to have settled on a game, so Yeonjun could just take a breather and try to shake off that uncomfortable encounter. Nothing much happened, anyways. Still, Yeonjun felt a sense of discomfort when thinking of what just happened, most of it caused by the touch he hadn’t consented to. 

Well, any thoughts of that alpha and his distasteful scent disappeared when he caught sight of Soobin finally joining them. He was late by at least 20 minutes, but Yeonjun didn’t grumble about that for a single moment. He was just happy to see him, having missed his presence since the moment he stepped foot in the apartment earlier. 

He had purposefully left the seat next to him empty, telling the others it was Soobin’s seat (though he probably hadn’t needed to tell them, they surely already knew). It startled him, then, when Soobin hesitated, his face quickly closing off any emotions from showing. It only took a moment or two, however, before he seemed to come to a decision. 

It felt like a stab to the heart to see Soobin actively choose not to sit next to him. Taehyun met Yeonjun’s eyes the moment Soobin chose to sit next to him instead, just as surprised as Yeonjun by Soobin’s decision. 

The most concerning part was, however, that Soobin was avoiding Yeonjun’s eyes, making a clear effort to keep his face devoid of emotion. 

“Bin-ah,” he said after a minute, desperate to get some kind of response from Soobin. “How did it go with Changmin?”

Soobin nodded in an almost careful way, as if he was holding something back with a lot of effort. “It went well,” he simply answered, and Yeonjun’s feeling of wrongness only grew. He knew that tone, that way of deflecting and not wanting to come out and say why he was upset. 

“What happened with Changmin?” Kai asked, and something painful popped in Yeonjun’s chest when Soobin didn’t seem to have any problem with meeting his eyes when answering. 

He missed what Soobin said, as all he could focus on was the fact that he was the problem. He had to be. Soobin was upset with him, not any of the others, or he wouldn’t be so obviously avoiding Yeonjun’s gaze. What… what could it be? What had he done? Was it that he didn’t pay attention to him when he arrived? Had he missed any text messages from Soobin? Picking up his phone, he checked, and the only thing he’d missed was Soobin’s message in their group chat saying he’d be a little late. Nothing that explained Soobin’s sour mood. 

Yeonjun tuned back into the conversation again when Soobin got out of his seat, saying he needed to go to the bathroom. Immediately, Yeonjun jumped to his feet, saying he’d join him, only to freeze up when Soobin held up his hand. 

“It’s fine,” Soobin said coldly. “I don’t need company to go to the bathroom.”

Normally, Yeonjun would have argued, but there was something in his tone that held Yeonjun back, stopping him from following. 

Watching Soobin’s back as he retreated, Yeonjun swallowed down a painful lump in his throat.

“Did you guys fight?” Beomgyu wondered aloud when Soobin was out of earshot. 

“ No ,” Yeonjun said, pouting involuntarily. “At least I… I don’t think so. We were fine when we had lunch together, and I haven’t seen him since then.”

“Maybe it’s about the cardigan he gave you?” Kai suggested, pulling everyone’s attention his way. 

“He finally gave it to you?” Taehyun asked.

“You knew about it?” Yeonjun countered, eyebrows raised in surprise. 

“I–” Taehyun’s big eyes widened, and he glanced at Kai as if asking for help. “No? I don’t know if I’m supposed to say…”

“What are you talking about, what cardigan?” Beomgyu asked, looking put off for being out of the loop. 

Without hesitation, Yeonjun pulled out his phone and showed them the pictures he’d shown Kai earlier. “He left it for me to find when I got home,” Yeonjun said, smiling despite himself at just the thought of it. 

“So, what, did you not say thank you or something?” Beomgyu wondered. “Is that why he’s mad?”

“That doesn’t make sense…” Taehyun thought out loud, while Yeonjun answered, 

“No, I definitely thanked him! I told him I love it, so it can’t be that.”

The way Taehyun was looking at him, his mouth pursed in a thoughtful way yet still with a certain Look in his eyes, made Yeonjun feel like he was missing something obvious. At the same time, this look was very common for Taehyun, so Yeonjun decided not to read into it too much.

When Soobin returned not long thereafter, thankfully no one said a word about his weird mood. Yeonjun might’ve burst out crying if anyone did that, because just the thought of Soobin actually being mad at him made him sensitive. And if he would have to be confronted by the reason for Soobin’s mood, he much preferred to do that in privacy than in a bar full of people. 

Even if the atmosphere was a little tense, the games were a perfect buffer, and as soon as they had chosen which game to start with, the tension seemed to ease out a bit. Soobin was still not sitting next to Yeonjun, and still mostly avoiding eye contact, but at least he wasn’t refusing to look in Yeonjun’s direction anymore. 

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

“Take that, old man!” 

“Quit it!” Yeonjun whined when his character was pushed into the water, making him have to wait for it to respawn. “This is a co-op game, what the hell are you doing?”

Beomgyu just laughed in response, and kept on bothering Yeonjun despite how it also sabotaged himself and his performance in the game. 

And Yeonjun was having fun. Somehow, having Beomgyu annoying him and doing his very best to set him off made him feel a little bit more at ease, more like things were normal. Still, there was a lump in his throat that he was reminded of every time he automatically looked to Soobin for his reaction and realized that Soobin didn’t seem to be having as much fun as everyone else. 

It was crushing Yeonjun that he couldn’t figure out what to do about it. Whenever Soobin so much as glanced in his direction, he perked up and instantly forgot about his character in the game, causing the rest of them to cry out and forcing him to focus on the game once more. 

There came one point where they had the perfect opportunity to talk, as the younger three decided that they would go get their next round of drinks all together, forcing Yeonjun and Soobin to be alone by the table. “Soobin, I–” Yeonjun had tried to form the right type of words, something that would get Soobin to open up rather than close himself even more, like Yeonjun knew he tended to do. “I can tell something is wrong. Did I do something? I’m sorry if I did, I just want to–”

“It’s alright,” Soobin cut in. “I’m fine; I don’t wanna talk, that's all.”

“Soobin, I can tell you’re upset.”

“Yeah, so? Can’t you just let me be upset?”

It was in times like this that Yeonjun cursed the fact that he and Soobin were so different. Because, if it were him, he would’ve jumped on the first chance to talk his problems out–at least that’s what he did before this whole omega-transformation mess. Soobin was, as Yeonjun had suspected, more prone to distancing himself, to brooding in his feelings all by himself until he realized he was too sad to keep up the isolation. It was different now, though. Now they lived together, and Yeonjun knew Soobin would struggle with how to deal with his upset emotions when he couldn’t get away from Yeonjun. 

“Well, if it’s something I did, I think we should talk about it. I don’t like seeing you upset, especially not when you’re upset with me .”

Soobin met his eyes then. “Who says I’m upset with you.”

Snorting, Yeonjun smiled bitterly. “It’s quite obvious, Binnie.”

Retreating his eyes again, Soobin’s expression almost cracked, but he quickly shook his head to gather himself again. “Well, maybe there’s nothing you can do about it.” He sighed, then, wincing as if he realized just how cold that might’ve sounded.“You didn’t do anything wrong, hyung. I just wasn’t expecting… never mind.”

Yeonjun craved the answer so badly he nearly leapt out of his seat and shook Soobin. Unfortunately, the younger three returned at that exact moment, and Yeonjun was left completely empty handed.

An hour and a half, and two more drinks later, Yeonjun was definitely feeling some kind of buzz. Not quite drunk, but definitely not sober. Still, the only thing he could think of was Soobin, but at least the edge of his sadness had been taken away by the alcohol. 

When feeling the need to pee, his first instinct was to grab Soobin, but when he remembered that the alpha wasn’t by his side, he ended up dragging Beomgyu with him instead. 

“D’you know you smell like a burnt tire?” Beomgyu asked him after they did their business and washed their hands side by side. 

“What?” 

“Yeah, it’s weird,” Beomgyu said with a nod. “I smelled it earlier but I didn’t realize it was coming from you until right now.”

Yeonjun looked down at himself. He smelled burnt? Where would that come from– OH. 

“Shit, there was this alpha who touched me when I was ordering before,” he muttered, leaning close to the mirror and inspecting his neck as if he could somehow see the pheromones left there by the alpha. “Gyu can you smell me? Where is it coming from?”

Thankfully, Beomgyu was as drunk as him and didn’t hesitate to lean in and take a whiff. He then lifted one of Yeonjun’s wrists and smelled there, then looked up at Yeonjun and nodded seriously, as if this was serious business. “It’s just from your neck, I think, but it’s like… a lot. Did he get to your scent gland?”

He shouldn’t have, Yeonjun thought, but maybe the scent blocker he’d been wearing all day had started to wear off and was less effective now. 

“Can I get it off?” he said with a loud sigh. Tilting his head, and getting a little dizzy, he zeroed in on the scent blocker on the side of his neck. An idea hit him, and since logical thinking had escaped him, he went with it in an instant, pulling off both scent blockers from the skin around his neck. 

Beomgyu yelped in surprise, not having expected the fast movement most likely. “Oh,” he said when he realized what was going on. “I guess that’s one way to do it.”

“Do I still smell burnt?” 

Beomgyu’s nose went wild. “I mean, yeah, but it’s gonna get less the more your own scent takes over.”

As they made their way out of there, Yeonjun realized he’d never gotten an actual answer about his scent, so he grabbed Beomgyu’s arm to catch his attention. “What do I smell like?”

“Huh?” Beomgyu frowned almost dramatically. “You’ve been an omega for months and you don’t know?” Yeonjun just shook his head. “Hmph. Well, me and Soobin actually discussed this a while ago. It’s like… amber? But also mixed with something sweeter and floral, but it’s a bit hard to pinpoint.”

Yeonjun lifted his arm to his nose, trying to get a whiff from it. When he realized the scent blocker was still on there, he ripped that one off too, but was still met with nothing. He whined a little, pouting at Beomgyu as he questioned why it was impossible to smell your own scent, when suddenly a tall figure stepped into his way and forced them to a stop. 

It was not the same alpha as earlier, but it might as well have been, with how repulsed Yeonjun was by his scent and his closeness. 

“Excuse me?” Beomgyu was the first to speak between the three, and it became obvious then that the alpha was mainly there because of Yeonjun, since he barely even glanced Beomgyu’s way. 

“Hey,” the guy said, and Yeonjun instantly felt the urge to throw up a little in his mouth. 

“We’re not interested,” Yeonjun answered, grabbing Beomgyu’s wrist to pull him with him, but before they could leave the guy stepped into his way once again. 

“Don’t be so hasty, omega,” he said, running his eyes down Yeonjun’s body lewdly. “I can be your alpha for a night, show you a thing or two.”

That was the last drop for Yeonjun. He let go of Beomgyu in order to step up to the alpha and force a sharp finger into his shoulder. “I do not want to be shown ‘a thing or two’ by you. I already have an alpha, thank you very much, and I’m sure he’d show you what he thinks of you if you don’t get out of my way right now.”

Yeonjun didn’t give the alpha the space to say another word, basically running away the moment he made sure Beomgyu was with him, and thankfully the guy didn’t make a scene. 

“You already have an alpha, huh?” Beomgyu teased. 

“Shut up.”

When they got back to their table, Yeonjun was in a worse mood than when he left, but his anger flipped instantly once he noticed the empty seat.

“Where’s Soobin?” 

Taehyun and Kai shared a look. “He, um, he just left,” Kai said carefully. 

“He what?” Yeonjun looked around, assuming it was a joke and that Soobin would appear in his view any second now. 

“We tried to talk to him,” Taehyun admitted, “because, you know, it was pretty obvious he wasn’t in a great mood. But he… kind of refused to talk about it, or he said he would tell us later, I guess? I don’t know what’s going on with him…”

“Yeah, and then like a minute ago, he was staring into space before suddenly just jumping to his feet and saying he needed to go,” Kai added, filling in the missing piece. 

“A minute ago?!” Yeonjun looked around, searching for the exit quickly before bolting. If Soobin left just a minute ago, he couldn’t have gotten far, could he?

Yeonjun stumbled onto the street outside, failing to stay completely upright due to his intoxicated state. When he straightened, he looked around frantically, trying to catch sight of a tall, familiar alpha in the crowd of people hanging out there. 

But Soobin was nowhere to be seen. Yeonjun even resorted to calling his name, hoping against hope that his friend would return once he heard his name being called. It wasn’t until Taehyun reached him and gently tugged him back inside, gently reassuring him that everything was fine and that Soobin would find his way home without problems, that the fight in Yeonjun died. 

They only stayed half an hour longer, only because they had booked the table for that long and Beomgyu argued that Soobin’s bad mood shouldn’t affect their chance to enjoy themselves. Still, the atmosphere between them all was gloomy, especially because they couldn’t stop Yeonjun from ordering and downing two more drinks during that time. 

After their time was up, they had to pull Yeonjun with them; not because he couldn’t walk, but because he was too sad to move.

“You’re whining an awful lot for someone who can just go home and cuddle ‘your alpha’ when you get home,” Beomgyu complained after having had Yeonjun hanging off him for the last ten minutes. He made a little noise that alerted Taehyun, who then came over and replaced Beomgyu.

“But he’ll still be mad at me,” Yeonjun answered, pouting as devastatingly as he could. It wasn’t fair—why did Soobin have to leave him? Soobin never did that before. He was always so caring, staying by Yeonjun’s side no matter how stupid the stuff he did when drunk became. Had he really pissed Soobin off so much that he made him act so out of character?

Wait, was he mad? He had said that he was upset when Yeonjun inquired about it, but he hadn’t specifically said he was angry, had he? Was he really upset for real? Like hurt by something Yeonjun had said? Or done?

“Guys,” he slurred, grabbing onto Taehyun’s arm more firmly. “Do you think Soobin was angry, or was he, like, sad?”

“He’s not angry, hyung,” Kai answered without hesitation.

Somehow that didn’t make Yeonjun feel better, because it only meant that Yeonjun had somehow managed to hurt his best friend badly without realizing it. “You sure? How do you know?”

“Just trust me.”

He really tried to do that, but the closer to home he got, the stronger his anxiety was growing. He loved Soobin, but he never really learnt how to deal with a Soobin that was angry or upset with him . He’d been by Soobin’s side in times where he was hurt by others, but he’d never been in this situation before. Not where it was this bad, where Soobin would rather run away from him than talk to him.

Their friends were kind enough to bring Yeonjun home, not wanting to leave him to fend for himself on the bus. When they reached the front door to his apartment building, he shook himself back to awareness and told them to go home.

“You sure?” Taehyun asked. “You don’t want one of us as a buffer, in case he’s, um…”

“No, no. I’m nervous because I don’t like this feeling that I did something, but I’m not scared of Soobin. I’d feel better if you all go home before it gets too late.”

Kai gave him a long hug then. “If you’re sure, hyung.”

Despite feeling a little dizzy, Yeonjun smiled reassuringly and ruffled Kai’s hair. “Of course. Now go get home, please.” He left a little pat on Kai’s butt before releasing the younger man from his embrace.

The other two hugged him as well before the three of them turned to leave. “Text me later,” Taehyun called out to him, the last words that were spoken before they disappeared back into the night.

Nervous, but still hopeful, Yeonjun made his way up to his apartment. He had to fix this, had to get through to Soobin and get him to tell him where the problem lay. If he didn’t know what he did wrong, how could he make it better?

After struggling a little to get the key in the lock—because apparently Soobin had locked it behind him?—Yeonjun stumbled into an eerily silent apartment. It was evident the moment he closed the door behind him that he was alone, but still his heart didn’t dare to lose hope until he had checked.

“Soobin?” He called out, voice cautious and worried. “Binnie, are you here?”

No answer. After stepping into the living area, he noticed how nothing had changed since he’d left for the bar earlier, which meant Soobin hadn’t come home at all.

With no hesitation, Yeonjun pulled out his phone and called Soobin. Only for him to be sent directly to voicemail.

Soobin had turned off his phone? Why?

He had to tell himself that it didn’t have to be as bad as it seemed. Maybe Soobin’s phone had just died, and he was taking a long way home. He could just be out on a walk, giving himself some space to calm down. Yeonjun just had to wait for him to come home, then they would talk.

Only, Soobin didn’t come home.

It was 1 am, and Yeonjun was a nervous wreck, lying on top of the covers and checking his phone every ten seconds for any possible update. He’d called Soobin multiple times in the last hour, and sent worried texts to all his friends, asking if they’d heard from the alpha.

No one had. Still, they tried to reassure him that nothing was wrong, that there was no need to freak out. Kai told him that Soobin probably just needed some time to think, and he would come back like a lost puppy with its tail between its legs tomorrow. Yeonjun found the image a little funny, even if he didn’t fully believe it.

After a long time of worrying and kind of freaking out, Yeonjun seemed to finally fall asleep. When he opened his eyes again, it was morning, and the sun was shining right at his face, waking him. For a moment, he’d forgotten about last night, and he expected to find Soobin next to him when he rolled over to his side. Only when he noticed the untouched covers that he was still laying on top of did the memories come trickling back in.

He scrambled for his phone, checking for any potential update from Soobin, only to come face to face with a bunch of texts from Kai and Taehyun, but none from Soobin. It was also not even 8:00 yet. Just great.

Yeonjun

Soobin still didn’t come home *crying emoji*

Idk what to do, what if something happened to him?

Can you guys call him? I don’t care if he’s just ignoring me, I just want to know he’s okay

Unsurprisingly, Taehyun was awake and quick to answer.

Taehyun

On it

I’m sure he’s fine

He wasn’t drunk or anything, and it wasn’t that late when he left

Yeonjun

Yeah but

It’s so unlike him

What did I do??? did i really hurt him this much?? *crying emoji x10* what if he hates me now?

Taehyun

Please don’t worry so much, hyung. I /promise/ that he doesn’t hate you

You know he could never hate you

I’m calling him now, let’s see

Yeonjun waited patiently for Taehyun’s next text, but when he still hadn’t sent any after 2 minutes, he had to throw his phone away and jump out of bed. He needed to get busy with something, or his anxiety was going to boil over into panic.

He started making himself ready for the day, showering, styling his hair, choosing a nice outfit, all to just ignore the gaping hole in his heart that was caused by Soobin’s absence. And the potential scenario that Taehyun was currently talking with Soobin on the phone, and that Soobin was pouring his heart out to him, when he had refused to say a single word to Yeonjun.

Taehyun’s response came 25 minutes later.

Taehyun

He’s fine. Sounded a little tired, but he promised that he was fine.

Yeonjun

AND?

Taehyun

Umm

Sorry hyung, he didn’t want me to tell you. But he promised that he will be fine, and that he just needed some time to think.

I tried to tell him to stop being stubborn and just go home, but you know how he is

Yeonjun did know how Soobin was.

Well, now he at least knew that Soobin was safe. Even if it hurt a little that Soobin would answer Taehyun so easily, when he’d probably seen all 20 of Yeonjun’s missed calls from yesterday and thought nothing of it.

Actually, it hurt more than a little. He wanted to call Soobin again, but the fear that the alpha would just ignore his call (or worse, click him), prevented him from doing so.

He needed another distraction. A better one than just getting dressed for a planless day ahead of him.

Without thinking too much, he created a group chat with his three friends, for the first time excluding Soobin.

YJ

Hey guys

I need one of you to take me out

BG

Take you out as in on a date, or as in killing you?

YJ

Neither????

I need a distraction

I’m trying not to spiral here

Kai

Just woke up

Do you want me to take you out?

Yeonjun

Can you?

Kai

Let’s get brunch, i’ve been wanting to go to this new place in town for a while

Yeonjun made sure to thank Kai and send him all the kisses in the world. Kai said that the other guys were invited too, but Beomgyu just said he refused to join them on their little ‘date’. Yeonjun sent him the middle finger emoji in response.

Since Yeonjun was already ready to go out, he just had to wait for Kai to get ready, which didn’t take much time at all. They agreed to meet on the way, and the moment Kai sent a text saying ‘I’m on my way!’ Yeonjun got off his butt and ran out the door.

It was pretty pleasant outside nowadays, as spring had finally reached them. He wondered if the cherry blossoms were blooming yet, and supposed he could drag Kai with him to see them if they had.

The brunch place that Kai had suggested was relatively new, and situated not too far from their university. It was cosy, with nice paintings decorating the walls and making it give a small town sort of feel being in there. This early, there were barely any other customers there, so they had no problem finding a nice spot to sit where they could enjoy the view through the large front windows.

They spent quite some time at the brunch place, talking about anything under the sun. Yeonjun could tell that Kai was being careful to not bring Soobin up, which he had to say that he was grateful for today.

Instead, they found themselves gossiping about Taehyun and Beomgyu, and whether something was actually going on there.

“Taehyun said he likes Beomgyu’s scent,” Yeonjun informed Kai.

“He told me he thinks Beomgyu is pretty, AND he said he can listen to Beomgyu ramble for hours,” Kai added.

“Now that is what I call whipped. What do you think, does he like him?”

Kai hummed in thought. “Well, let’s put it like this: I’ve never seen him willingly drive to the other side of the city just to get a potted plant for someone else.”

“He did that? I’m telling you, whipped.”

It was fun, to get to hang out with Kai like this, even if the thought of Soobin kept staying at the back of Yeonjun’s mind the whole time. Distractions were like that: temporarily removing the issues, but solving nothing in the long run.

After having brunch and staying there as long as they felt reasonable, Kai took Yeonjun out for a walk. It had gotten slightly warmer since they entered, warm enough that Yeonjun debated removing his jacket after walking for a short time.

Since they had gone out so early, it was still early when they had been out walking for an hour. Yeonjun’s feet were hurting, and he felt exhausted since it had been a while since he moved this much.

Unfortunately, when lunch time rolled in, Kai had family responsibilities to get back to. He kept apologizing to Yeonjun, feeling guilty about leaving him to go back home alone, but Yeonjun reassured him that he’d done more than enough already.

He tried to get lunch on his own, but after getting takeout and thinking about heading back home—where he would be completely alone—he felt his anxiety creeping back in rapidly. 

So, instead he found a bench, looking out over the river, where he quietly ate his food and watched the people passing by on boats. He supposed it was just warm enough for boat rides; even if it was too early for cherry blossoms to have bloomed yet.

The longer he sat there, the colder he got, the wind biting into his skin. Occasionally, the sun peaked out and warmed him, but the cold hit harder each time it disappeared behind the clouds again. He sat there, holding out for as long as he could stand it, and then a little longer.

His phone vibrated a couple of times as he sat there, indicating incoming text messages but no apparent phone calls. Yeonjun knew none of them were from Soobin, anyways, so he ignored it for most of the time he was sitting there.

He finally had enough when he saw people walking past him give him worrying looks, which made him wonder if maybe his skin was turning blue in the cold. Well, no, it couldn’t be that cold. Maybe he just looked so devastatingly sad that just one look made them pity him.

Checking his phone, he quickly answered their group chat that he was doing fine (not exactly a lie, but not really the truth either). Then he found a surprising text from someone he hadn’t talked to in some time.

Juyeon

Heyy you know how we were talking about grabbing dinner?

Are you free tonight? 

Yeonjun jumped to answer directly, excitement growing since the thought of a new plan for this day meant a little less time he would have to spend on his own. 

Yeonjun

Hiii and yes! I’d love to have dinner tonight

It wasn’t exactly dinner time yet for a few hours, but Yeonjun didn’t have anything better to do, and he definitely didn’t want to go home, so he just told Juyeon to come meet him in town as soon as he could. He ended up walking around town at a slow pace, wishing that he’d had earphones so he could have blocked out his own thoughts with loud music.

He didn’t keep track of the time, just made sure to check his phone whenever he felt an incoming text. Eventually, Juyeon called him, informing him he was on the way.

The perhaps best part of his day was when he caught sight of Juyeon walking up to him down the street, and the very needed hug that followed after.

“How are you?” Juyeon asked him, the question he was reluctant to answer. “You look a little…”

“Tired?” Yeonjun suggested with a bitter laugh.

“Sad,” Juyeon replied, and Yeonjun had to avoid his intelligent eyes when it started feeling like he was seeing through him way too easily.

He managed to dodge the question by pointing out what direction they should head, and then dragged Juyeon with him to a restaurant they had both agreed upon. And being the kind friend he was, Juyeon let it slide, at least for now.

It had been some time since he’d seen Juyeon last now, a couple of weeks since he met up with him and Chanhee. They kept contact since then, though, by texting here and there, but now Yeonjun felt like he hadn’t heard much about Juyeon’s life for quite some time. 

Juyeon changed that immediately, by telling him what had been going on in his life. How he was fully back to work, and that he appreciated his job as a middle school teacher now more than ever. 

To Yeonjun’s delight, Juyeon informed him that he and Chanhee were still going steady, or in Juyeon’s words: “as strong as ever”. They were even looking to try and move in together, as soon as they could. Yeonjun had barely been able to hide his jealousy when that was brought up. 

It had been evident to Juyeon that Yeonjun was having a not so great day, so it was only a question of when he was going to bring it up. It took until halfway through dinner, before he brought it up.

“I feel like I’ve only been talking about myself nonstop,” Juyeon joked. “How have you been? How’s school? And everything else in your life? Are you more like… settled now?”

Yeonjun wanted to snort. Settled? Was he? He supposed he’d acclimatized to it somewhat in these last few months, but he couldn’t say that he felt fully settled in his new role as an omega. Especially not today, when he felt like his life was starting to unravel.

“It’s been… better, lately,” he ended up saying, because it was the truth. The last time he met Juyeon had been before he managed to get his life back together, before he was allowed back in school and around the same time he’d been admitted to the hospital because his insides were changing. Not exactly a good time, back then. These last few weeks had been... good, by those standards. 

“That’s good to hear,” Juyeon said, but he still looked a little unsure, a little doubtful. Shit, Yeonjun’s pokerface was terrible and he knew it. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just… today’s not really a good day. I mean, I was super happy to get your text and to hang out today but… I have to admit this is kind of… distraction?”

“From what?” Juyeon asked, smiling kindly at Yeonjun who was fiddling nervously with his napkin. 

Now was the time where he could choose to tell Juyeon about his feelings for Soobin. He remembered thinking about it last time he met him, but deciding to wait. But now it was just him and Juyeon here, and he was perhaps in a great need of someone to talk to. An outside perspective, perhaps.

“I’m…” he opened his mouth, struggling to form anything coherent. “My best friend. He’s, I don’t know, mad at me I think?” He shook his head. That didn’t sound quite right. “No, he’s… I did something that upset him, and now I feel…” he choked up, having to look away to prevent Juyeon from seeing the tears welling up in his eyes. 

Until now, he hadn’t cried. But facing it head on by talking about it made the long awaited tears come forth.

“Your best friend?” Juyeon asked gently. “You mentioned your friends, back then…” he hummed thoughtfully. “Taehyun? Or one of the others…?”

Thinking back to his time in the cell, Yeonjun could recall times he’d been lying on that stone cold ‘bed’ (if it could even be called that), staring up at the ceiling and just talking to Juyeon about whatever they could muster up. He’d talked about his friends quite a lot, maybe because he’d missed them so much. If he had to be honest, he knew he’d probably talked about Soobin much more than the rest of his friends, but it wasn’t exactly weird, was it? Soobin was his oldest friend.

“Soobin.” He took a deep breath. 

“Soobin, right. He’s the… your childhood friend?” Yeonjun nodded. “Okay, and he’s upset with you? If you’ve known each other that long, maybe he’ll come around?”

“I don’t know I—“ Yeonjun swiped at his nose, where snot was threatening to drip down. “He’s never been upset with me before. I mean, not like this. He’s not the type to get mad easily, but once he does he holds a grudge. The worst part is that I don’t know what I did. He wouldn’t tell me.”

Juyeon looked more confused than anything, so he asked Yeonjun to explain what happened so that he could give some helpful insight. So Yeonjun did. He told him about yesterday, about the gift he’d received from Soobin, and what it meant for him to have Soobin’s scent on it. He continued along to their meetup at the bar, and how cold Soobin had been from the moment he arrived. 

“So everything was okay before you left home, and then he acted weird when he showed up?”

“Yes! That’s why it confuses me so much, I have no idea what could have happened in that time.”

 “Well,” Juyeon said, “I think the only thing you can do is wait for him. It’s not your responsibility to apologize for something you don’t even know about. It’s on him to inform you of his boundaries and whenever you’re crossing them.”

I thought I knew Soobin’s boundaries already, Yeonjun thought bitterly. He reached for his drink, downing the soda quickly and staring down at the empty inside, for a moment wishing it had been something stronger that he could use to drown his sorrows.

“I guess you’re right. I just… it hurts me to think I hurt him, you know? Like…” he grabbed the fabric of his shirt, right over his heart. “It hurts.”

“It’s never nice, fighting with your best friend,” Juyeon nodded.

“Yeah but Soobin’s—“

Yeonjun stopped himself, realizing he’d almost spit his whole heart out in one sentence. Usually, he was much more careful to talk about his feelings for Soobin, at least with people who didn’t know.

But honestly, what was the point of keeping his feelings a secret any longer? Everyone else in his life knew about it already. It was inevitable that they found out. Right now he was given a chance to tell someone he cared about on his own terms. Most other people had figured it out from just seeing Yeonjun with Soobin, but Juyeon had just only briefly met Soobin once, when he and the guys had come to pick him up after the final escape mission. 

“Soobin is…” how did he phrase it though? The love of his life? The most important person in his life? The one his heart was desperately, achingly yearning for despite him being right by his side most of his life?

“He’s important,” he said. “To me, he’s-he’s like Chanhee is to you.”

Realization filled Juyeon’s eyes. “Oh.” Then he frowned in thought. “Like, he’s your—?”

“Oh! No, no, no,” Yeonjun realized what that sounded like. “We’re not like… we’re best friends. I’m just in love with him, on top of that.”

“Oh.” This time, Juyeon sounded more understanding. 

“Yeah.”

“And I guess you never told him about that, right?”

“Oh hell no,” Yeonjun let out a surprised snort. 

“So, you don’t know if he feels the same, then?”

Images of Soobin filled his mind. Him being so awfully sweet all the time, so accepting and understanding and just close , always so close to Yeonjun when he needed it. How he refused to leave Yeonjun, had basically moved in with him because he couldn’t stand the thought of being away from him. Maybe it was a trauma response, but maybe it was something more, as well. Yeonjun was never good at seeing love in other people’s eyes. Or at least separating what kind of love he was seeing. He knew Soobin loved him, of course, but it was impossible for him to say if it had ever grown as strong as Yeonjun’s love for him.

Defeated, Yeonjun admitted, “no, I don’t really know. I used to think he was straight and that I had no chance because of that, but now… I honestly don’t know what he likes. I’ve never seen him show interest in anyone else, so how am I supposed to know if he likes me ?”

“Sometimes it’s impossible to know,” Juyeon said. “Some people keep their emotions hidden very well. The only way to know is to talk about it, or by showing him how you feel.”

“Easier said than done,” Yeonjun muttered.

“I know,” Juyeon said, placing a hand over Yeonjun’s. “I’m not saying it’s easy, or even that you have to do it. But like… some people need that push.”

“Yeah.” Yeonjun let out a huff of air. He kind of needed that push, so why was he the one who had to be brave here? It wasn’t fair. But it also wasn’t fair to lay it all on Soobin, to hope for a happy miracle when he himself was too cowardly to even consider confessing.

Conversation shifted a little after that, and instead of Soobin they started talking about their common struggles: PTSD from their time in imprisonment. Juyeon was struggling with paranoia and panic attacks, which Yeonjun had to admit had hit him more than a few times as well in the last months. They shared a fear of walking through close spaces, though Yeonjun had managed to get over it lately by having such good friends by his side managing his fear. Not to forget, the strong fear of public transport, buses or trains all the same. Juyeon also talked about Chanhee, who was haunted by nightmares. 

“I actually started going to therapy recently,” Juyeon admitted. “It’s been going pretty slow, but I think it’s helping.” He swiped the last of his drink, looking down at his empty plate in front of him. “Chanhee is being stubborn about it though. I keep telling him it could help to talk to someone, that it could help him deal with his nightmares, but he refuses.”

“Stubborn, is he?” Yeonjun asked, amused.

“I never met someone as stubborn as him before,” Juyeon said with a fond shake of his head. “What about you?”

“I considered it,” Yeonjun admitted. “It was… bad, in the beginning, you know. But I’m managing now. My friends have been kinda like therapists, they’ve been helping me deal with most of my struggles. Besides, I feel like there wouldn’t really be any therapist that knew much about the whole ‘human-turned-omega’ mental health problems.”

Juyeon looked at him with a pained expression. “It’s all so shitty. Why would they…” he shook his head, hands tightening into fists on the table. “They called themselves scientists, and thought they could play god and do whatever they wanted? Human experimentation… what was their goal, anyways? Make man made werewolves, and then what?”

Yeonjun couldn’t meet his eyes. He appreciated the anger, appreciated that Juyeon cared so much that he asked these questions, but it was hard for him to face them. “I don’t know. I used to lay awake thinking about it but… I just don’t know. Maybe they wanted to create alphas who’re strong but… I don’t know why they would want to create… omegas like me.”

Truth was, he had thought about it a lot, and he didn’t like the answers he’d come up with. He much preferred not to talk about it now, much less to think about it. Juyeon seemed to realize that, probably because his body language was easy to read. So instead, he brought up the kids he was teaching in school, and about all the mischiefs they were making.

It turned into a really nice evening. Maybe not as distracting as he’d hoped for, considering how much they’d been talking about Soobin and other problems of Yeonjun’s, but still very nice.

After eating, they discussed going somewhere else for dessert. Yeonjun was all for that, especially after checking his phone and still seeing nothing from Soobin. 

When they left, a group of guys were standing around the exit, so they had to excuse themselves and push through them. Yeonjun kept his head down, and assumed it would be no big deal since they were all human. But just as he pushed through, Juyeon coming right after him, he was hit by a nausea inducing scent that was all too familiar.

Rose perfume. Strong enough to pierce Yeonjun’s nose, painfully overwhelming.

“Ah fuck.” Yeonjun held his breath as he stumbled away from the restaurant, waiting until they were some distance away before sucking in deep breaths of fresh air.

“What happened?” Juyeon asked as Yeonjun closed his eyes hard and rubbed his nose like a wild animal.

“It’s, the smell…” 

It could just be a coincidence. Most likely it was just that. Humans often wore perfumes that smelled too strong to his sensitive nose. But it was just… that smell was so specific, so familiar, that he couldn’t help the way his whole body seized in fear as he recognized it.

“Yeonjun?” Juyeon sounded worried, and it took him grabbing Yeonjun’s hand for Yeonjun to realize that he was trembling. “It’s okay, you’re safe.”

He was safe. He was with Juyeon.

Slowly, he pulled himself back together, until he was stable enough to walk with Juyeon to the cafe they had discussed getting dessert from. 

Yeonjun was halfway through his ice cream sundae when his fear response started up at full alert again. For a moment he assumed his senses were off after smelling the perfume earlier, but then his eyes fell on the group sitting by the table just by the entrance door. 

Despite how he hadn’t seen their faces before, Yeonjun knew instinctively that these were the same guys that had been covering the exit before at the restaurant. 

Juyeon noticed almost instantly that something was wrong. He raised his eyebrows, asking Yeonjun nonverbally what the issue was.

“Those guys,” he hissed under his breath. “By the entrance. It’s the same guys as before. With the smell.”

“You sure?” Juyeon asked. He was careful not to look over there immediately, but accidentally knocked his napkin off the table so he could turn his head and look at them as he bent to pick it up. 

Yeonjun noticed his eyes widening ever so slightly.

“Yeonjun,” he hissed. “I don’t want to freak you out, but we should leave. Right now.”

Yeonjun wasn’t saying no to that. He downed what was on his spoon, then followed Juyeon as he stood and moved towards the exit. They nodded politely at the waiters as they passed, and headed for the door while promptly not looking at the group in the corner right next to it.

The floral scent was back, but at least not as strong when they were just passing by. Yeonjun tried to ignore it, mostly by holding his breath once again. His heart was pounding in his chest, a constant reminder that he could never feel totally safe in public.

Finally, once they reached the pavement outside, Juyeon held his arms out, asking for a hug that Yeonjun gladly accepted. 

It was only a brief embrace, though. “Come on,” Juyeon said, grabbing Yeonjun’s hand. “We need to leave.”

“What was that?” 

Juyeon pulled him down the street, looking over his shoulder multiple times as they increased their speed. “Those guys. I recognized them. Or, at least some of them. From the lab. Not—“ he took a shaky breath. “Not Mr X, but the guys with him. Some guards, maybe.”

“What?” Yeonjun hadn’t even noticed, he had been too preoccupied with freaking out over the scent.

“Yeah but it’s fine, we—“

They came to an abrupt stop, Juyeon having run straight into someone ahead of them. They had both been too occupied looking over their shoulders that they hadn’t noticed the people that had cut their way off.

“Fuck,” Juyeon cursed, and immediately they both stepped back. Juyeon covered Yeonjun without thinking twice. 

Yeonjun felt panic start clawing up his throat. Memories of their imprisonment, of dark cages and needles and drugs resurfaced, which only served to make Yeonjun’s panic more pronounced. His vision thinned, the edges of his field of view growing black and crawling inwards. 

All he could see was Juyeon, standing up for him. His ears had gone numb, but he was sure Juyeon must be saying something. Maybe screaming, attempting to call for help. 

The scent of roses filled his nose once more, and it was the last straw for Yeonjun. Something inside of him snapped, breaking the connection between his body and his consciousness. Suddenly, all he could feel was a dark and blissful nothingness.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The previous night

It was cold and dark outside, yet Soobin kept on walking. He didn’t know what else to do, he just knew he couldn’t go home. He wouldn’t go home, because the thought of running into Yeonjun right now was painful.

Rejection truly stung worse than he had expected. Not only had Yeonjun refused to wear his sweater out–which Soobin had initially only been a little miffed about but assumed could have a good explanation–but he’d also walked back to the table, very clearly smelling like another alpha. An alpha Soobin didn’t even recognize. 

The pain that seized his heart in that moment was unlike anything he’d experienced before. He never believed it when people talked about heartbreak and the physical implications of it before. After today, he did.

Somehow, the nonchalance of it all stung even worse than being outright rejected. That Yeonjun didn’t seem to understand how big of a deal this was to Soobin, and that he didn’t seem to care to even acknowledge the denial of the courting gift. 

Ahhh, he really got rejected, didn’t he? Even the cold night air biting at his cheeks did nothing to distract him from the constant ache in his chest as he thought of Yeonjun now.

Soobin both wanted and didn’t want to know who that alpha Yeonjun smelled like was. Was it someone from his dance school? He had spent quite some time there, maybe he had… No, Soobin couldn’t even think of it.

On top of it all, there had been that alpha hitting on Yeonjun in front of Soobin’s nose. Soobin might have played that off as a coincidence, if it wasn’t for the glimpse he caught of Yeonjun’s suddenly bare skin. Had he removed his scent blockers to lure alphas in?

Fuck, Soobin felt terrible to think of Yeonjun that way. He knew Yeonjun better than that. Logically, his heart told him he was wrong, that his Yeonjun wasn’t like that. Even so, he hadn’t been able to stop his own visceral reaction when he realized what was going on. It was a mix of rage and panic, and not something he wanted to let out while in public. Hence, he’d fled. 

It was a coward’s move, he knew it, but he wasn’t very well equipped when it came to emotions and how to deal with them. Especially not when he’d been building up this whole courting thing for so long. Now it hurt even worse to see it fail.

So, Soobin walked. He walked and walked, having  turned off his phone early, keeping no track where he was going. He just needed to keep moving. 

Hours had passed, yet his mind hadn’t tired, hadn’t silenced his panicking thoughts. Somehow, he found himself in a familiar neighborhood. 

Before he knew it, he was unlocking the door to his parents house, using the spare key they always hid in a secret place outside. It was dark and silent inside, so he snuck up to his room without alerting anyone.

Once he closed the door to his old bedroom behind him, he finally pulled his phone out and turned it back on.

Missed calls after missed calls met him, and so did a bunch of texts. It was all expected, though the number of missed calls from Yeonjun startled him. What was Yeonjun thinking? Why would he call him so many times?

Well, his phone also alerted him that it was past 2 am right now, so thoughts about this would be better to face with a well-slept brain.

-

Sleep didn’t help much. Not in making him feel better, at least. He woke up to his mom knocking on his door, a questioning look on her face as he came inside.

“Soobinnie, when did you come home?” She asked. It was a valid question, because he hadn’t exactly alerted them that he was coming.

“Late,” he admitted, rolling over so he was facing her and rubbing his face with one hand tiredly. “I—ah, I had a fight with Yeonjun. Didn’t want to go back to the apartment.”

“A fight?” A serious look came upon her face, reminding Soobin of how uncommon such an occurrence was. He and Yeonjun never fought. The worst fight they had was when they were kids and were squabbling over who took who’s toy, probably.

His mom ushered him out of bed, insisting that he tell her what was going on over breakfast. And so he did. He had always had a close relationship with his mom, and it felt good to tell her when he’d been walking around stuck in his own head all of last night.

Talking to her helped make him feel better. Pulled him back to his senses. It was stupid of him to assume, she said. Not only stupid, but unfair, because it meant he didn’t give Yeonjun a chance to answer. In her eyes, it didn’t look like a fight at all. It looked like Soobin was reacting—she was kind enough not to call it overreacting, even though he knew that’s what she was thinking—to something without having seen the full picture. When he mentioned the missed calls, how Yeonjun had tried to call him into the late hours, her idea was cemented. And Soobin trusted her opinion. She made him feel better, even if he still felt a little hollow. 

Funnily enough, he felt a distant sort of ache the entire time. It wasn’t so much heartache, he realized (or his mom made him realize), but a deep sense of longing. Maybe combined with fear; fear of rejection, but also fear that he had fucked it all up.

Soobin had stopped denying his feelings of love for his best friend some time ago, but it still sometimes surprised him how strongly he could feel any feelings if it regarded Yeonjun. 

It was still morning when his phone rang. Soobin had finished his breakfast a while ago, and had spent the last half hour scrolling on his phone, trying to build up courage to text Yeonjun. So, when his phone started vibrating, for a split second he hoped to see Yeonjun’s name at the top.

But it wasn’t Yeonjun.

“ Hey hyung, ” Taehyun answered a moment after Soobin had picked up.

“Hey Tae,” he answered, too tired to even care to act normal. 

“ Hey, so where are you? Hyung said you didn’t come home last night? ”

“Oh.” Soobin had known this would be about Yeonjun, but he still blanked at the immediate mention of him. “I’m at my parents’. Did you… have you talked to him?”

“ Just over text, I think he just woke up and freaked out a little. And you? Why haven’t you talked to him? ”

“I’m…” well, that was the million dollar question wasn’t it? He grumbled over how to answer it, until Taehyun’s words trickled back into his mind. “Wait, what do you mean ‘freaking out’?”

“ I mean, he really wasn’t happy when you left last night, hyung. You should have said something. I think the whole night was very upsetting for him. ”

Soobin knew that Yeonjun had been upset last night. Of course he did, he wasn’t blind. But the thing was— Soobin was also upset. Taehyun made it sound like it was all his fault, that he had been upsetting Yeonjun on purpose, when that was the last thing he had wanted.

“Yeah well it wasn’t so fun for me either,” Soobin muttered, staring at the cup of coffee his mom had given him after their talk. It was untouched so far, and most likely it had gone cold already. “Do you think I wanted to leave just to upset him?”

“ I know you didn’t. But hyung, don’t you think you were overreacting? ”

There was that word. Well, yeah, maybe he had. But what if he hadn’t? What if he’d read everything exactly as it was—that Yeonjun had met another alpha that he bonded with, and let him be the first person to truly scent him. If Taehyun could just see that, then he would know just how Soobin was feeling.

To get him to see his point of view, he ended up telling Taehyun everything. Down to the last detail. How he had prepared the courting gift so precariously, had worn it around the apartment with his scent blockers off over the course of days—any time he found himself alone. How he’d hoped that Yeonjun would wear it out last night, but told himself it wouldn’t matter if he didn’t. And how the sight of him not wearing it still had been a strong hit to his hoping heart, only for the sudden reveal of a stranger’s scent covering Yeonjun to completely destroy him.

Taehyun said he hadn’t noticed. But Soobin knew that he was right. He was so in tune with everything Yeonjun that he could smell the slight slipping out of Yeonjun’s scent from his worn out blockers, mixing with that disgusting scent on top. And then there was that whole thing with Yeonjun ripping off his scent blockers, attracting alphas left and right in an instant.

“ I’m sure there’s a good explanation to all of this ,” Taehyun said. “ I’m sorry it didn’t go as you planned with the courting gift, though. But are you really going to give up, just like that? Yeonjun-hyung didn’t seem to even realize what it was… ”

“Of course he didn’t,” Soobin muttered, groaning and leaning back on the couch as he grumbled about this whole situation.

“ Well, in any case, I don’t think it’s fair of you to be angry with Hyung. He didn’t do anything wrong, so the least you can do is text him. ”

“I’m not angry . I’m… I’m…” Sad. Sensitive . Freaking devastated, if you asked his heart. Though talking to his mom and now Taehyun was helping to calm the aching slightly. 

“ I know ,” Taehyun sighed, voice kind as he continued. “ It’s hard, isn’t it? Having feelings .”

That made Soobin snort. “Yeah. Sure is. I’m sorry for leaving, I know it wasn’t fair, I just… I panicked.”

“ It’s okay, you know I of all people understand, right? But it’s not me you should apologize to .”

“No, I know. I’ll text him, or call him later. Right now I just… I guess I need some space; some time to think. 

“ Thinking about what your next courting gift is gonna be? How about a large placard with his face on it that says ‘I wanna bite you, let’s date’ .”

There was just something about the way Taehyun said that so seriously that caught Soobin off guard, and he ended up laughing for a full minute. He was clutching his stomach afterwards, and his mom peeked inside to see what he was up to. 

“ What, it’s exactly what you need. Straight to the point ,” Taehyun said when Soobin’s laughter had calmed to a level where their conversation could continue. 

“Too soon,” Soobin answered, wiping away the tears that had gathered in his eyes and welled over. 

“Okay, okay. Give it a few days, then. But hyung–” he paused, waiting for Soobin to hum in response, “trust me, it’s not as bad as you’re fearing. It’s really not. Just be patient with him, and don’t give up.”

Smiling warmly, Soobin supposed that he could do that. “Okay. I trust you.”

“ Good. Thank you. Do you want me to tell Hyung where you are? ”

“Oh.” Soobin’s chest tightened at the possibility of Yeonjun showing up at their door, even if he knew Yeonjun would most likely wait him out. “Could you… not? Just tell him I’m okay, and that I will come back home soon. I just need some time.”

Taehyun promised he would do that. Their conversation wrapped up shortly after that, and Soobin ended up once again scrolling through his phone, this time almost blindly. He did that for a while, until he felt restless and jittery. 

Instead, he went to find his mom, and ended up spending a few hours helping her clear out the weed that was covering her garden. Working with his hands helped him take his mind off his struggles for a little while, though flashes of Yeonjun would disturb his fake calm occasionally. 

After helping out in the garden, he found his dad working in the garage and was put to work once more, being put on the task of changing tires, and after that sawing down some branches from a tree that had grown wild in their yard. It was even more gruesome work than helping out his mom, and left him breathless and tired, just in time for lunch. 

The day passed much the same, with Soobin finding one thing or another to do around the house. His mom kept an eye on him, he could tell, and made sure to check in on him every hour to make sure that he wasn’t overworking himself as a way to try to cope with his feelings.

Kai and Taehyun had texted him since the morning, but the lack of anything from Yeonjun made him feel pathetically small. It didn’t make sense, when he was the cause of this whole ‘squabble’ between them, but he supposed he just hated the thought of Yeonjun avoiding him. 

As if Yeonjun was even avoiding him. More like, he was giving him the space he had asked for. But now that he was given it, Soobin didn’t want it. He didn’t want to stay away from Yeonjun, to be left alone. He wanted to hug Yeonjun and tell him how much he meant to him. 

More than anything, he wanted to kiss those pretty lips, grab that perfect waist and lift him into his lap, hold him there until–

He was letting his mind run a little too wild, wasn’t he?

Ignoring his annoyingly strong emotions, he checked the texts from his other friends. Taehyun was at first just reassuring him that it was okay to take his time. He also sent a few links with suggestions for pick up lines and over the top courting gift ideas. Soobin just rolled his eyes at those, moving over to Kai’s messages instead. 

He nearly dropped his phone when he saw two images he most definitely hadn’t expected to see. Instantly, his heartbeat picked up, and his fingers were moving on their own accord, saving the pictures. 

There was a message from Kai, just above the pictures. 

Kai

Hyung took this for you yesterday. Doesn’t he look good?

Oh fuck. 

Kai had sent him pictures that were taken by Yeonjun in the mirror, phone tilted to show off his face where he was sticking out his tongue cheekily, but most of all the focus was on what he was wearing. The sweater. The black and white sweater Soobin had gifted him. He’d tried it on, and judging by the look on his face, he liked it?

He switched to the second picture. There, Yeonjun was lifting the hem of the neck to his nose, clearly breathing it in. What the–

Soobin struggled to understand. Yeonjun had taken these for him? Then why hadn’t he sent them, or at least one, to him yesterday? And in that second picture, he was most definitely breathing in Soobin’s scent, which he knew he had left all over it before wrapping it up so neatly in that paper. 

He scrambled to send an answer to Kai immediately. 

Soobin 

What the fuck Kai??? where did this come from

Kai

I think what you meant to say was “thank you Kai for sending those nice pictures”

I was just out with Hyung earlier. I got him to send me some of his selfies from yesterday.

Wouldn’t you say he looks absolutely in love with your courting gift?

Shit . So Yeonjun had shown Kai those pictures, and Kai had asked to get some so that he could send them to Soobin? Did Yeonjun even know they had been shared? Did Soobin even care if the answer was yes or no?

Soobin

You’re evil

Kai

No, I’m your saviour

Soobin

My saviour who is trying to kill me

Kai

Yes yes, and now your saviour is telling you to go home 

I know you are both miserable and lonely, but this time it’s all up to you to fix it

Soobin

I knowwww. I will. I don’t know why I thought taking a day to myself would clear anything up. I just feel sadder than I did before. 

Maybe a bit wiser, but that’s mostly thanks to mom and taehyun

Kai

oh hail wise man Soobin

go get your man

I hope you’ll both feel better once youre reunited <3

Soobin had already decided that he was going back home without consciously thinking about it. Talking to Kai had helped cement the idea. 

It was only half past 4, not even 24 hours had passed since he last saw Yeonjun. But that had been more than enough time without him. Soobin had spent weeks without him once, without knowing he was even alive. This time he had willingly left Yeonjun. Never again. He never wanted to stay separated from him ever again. 

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

“Hyung?” 

Soobin closed the door behind him, frowning when he didn’t immediately see Yeonjun’s shoes where they were usually thrown off next to the shoe rack. His jacket was gone as well, which could only mean that Yeonjun wasn’t home. 

Still, he couldn’t help but call for him. “Hyung!” But no answer came. Soobin stumbled into the living room, and all but fell on top of the couch, miserable once again. The whole way home, he had imagined finding Yeonjun at home, his new sweater draped over his shoulders as he awaited Soobin’s homecoming. 

He looked around the place, seeing no difference to how it had looked yesterday before he left. The only thing was that the bed had been left unmade, as if Yeonjun had fallen out of bed that morning and not been in the mindset to go back and fix it.

Where could Yeonjun be? Kai had told him they had met earlier, before lunch, but that was many hours ago by now. Had Yeonjun come home and then left again? Maybe he was hanging out with some of his other friends. Wooyoung? Changbin?

Soobin was too shy to text Yeonjun still, but shameless enough to send texts to both of Yeonjun’s other close friends. He wasn’t very well acquainted with them, but well enough for them to answer in a friendly manner. 

Wooyoung

Sorry man, haven’t seen him

Changbin

We texted yesterday, but I haven’t heard from him today, sorry!

Well, Soobin had tried, at least. 

As time ticked on, Soobin tried making himself busy at home. Cleaning was an option as good as any, so somehow he found himself on the bathroom floor, scrubbing the shower walls. It had to be done at some point, so why not when he had nothing better to do than waiting for Yeonjun to come home?

As he was scrubbing, he was frustratingly thinking about how last night turned out. The more he thought about it, the more stupid he felt. Sure, his feelings weren’t invalid, but his reaction might’ve been too extreme. He’d taken Yeonjun’s silence and twisted it into words that matched his own deepest darkest fears. But deep down he knew that it wasn’t what Yeonjun really would say to him. 

They needed to talk. Soobin needed to talk. Or at least, he needed to get his head out of his ass and explain why yesterday got him so upset. Though, Yeonjun was smart. If Soobin mentioned the courting gift he would most likely figure the rest out on his own. And no matter how many times his parents or his friends told him that that was a good thing, it never failed to scare the shit out of him. 

The day was coming to an end, turning into night as the sun slowly disappeared outside. Soobin took a break, once again checking his phone. But there was no update from any of his friends. No missed calls or texts from Yeonjun. Nothing. 

He checked the time. 9 pm. He should probably eat something. Maybe he could make something for the two of them to share when Yeonjun returned. If nothing else, it could be a nice buffer, something for them to focus on if the conversation turned awkward. 

Well, that was as good a plan as any. He took his phone with him, aiming to turn on a podcast or something as he cooked. Before he had found something, he jerked at the sudden incoming call that appeared on his screen. 

After realizing who it was calling him, he almost dropped his phone out of sheer surprise. It was a bad day, okay?

“Yeonjun-hyung!” he exclaimed right after answering, his excitement and longing perhaps coming out very obviously in the way he couldn’t contain himself. 

“Um hi,” a voice that was not Yeonjun’s greeted him, immediately alerting Soobin. “Sorry, this is Juyeon, I’m with Yeonjun right now.”

“Oh.” Juyeon. Yeonjun was with Juyeon right now? Since when did they have plans? And why was Juyeon calling him from Yeonjun’s phone? “Right, Juyeon, hi. What’s going on?”

“I need help. It’s kind of an emergency,” Juyeon explained in a rushed tone that Soobin only now heard was close to panicking. “I mean–I think we’re safe, like in a safe place? But Yeonjun is not… he’s not looking so good. I don’t know exactly what happened to him but I think it’s some kind of trauma response. He’s like, completely unresponsive. It’s like he doesn’t hear me, or at least he doesn’t understand what I’m saying, and I don’t know, I don’t think he can get home by himself like this.”

Before Juyeon had even finished explaining, Soobin senses all sharpened as he took in the seriousness of the situation. “Where are you right now?”

Juyeon told him the name of the place and the general direction, saying he could send a pin location if needed. Before he was even finished explaining, Soobin had already pulled his shoes on, grabbed his keys, and bolted out the door. 

“Do you think you can move him?” he spoke into the phone as he rushed down the stairs, too impatient to wait for the elevator. “I’m on my way but it’ll be like 15 minutes, unless you can meet me halfway.” 

“Um, I’ll try,” Juyeon said, his tone doubtful. There was some rustling from the other side before Juyeon spoke again. “Yeonjunnie? Can you stand? Here, I’ll help you.” A few seconds passed, and more scuffling sounds reached Soobin. “I don’t think I can,” Juyeon told Soobin next, “he’s like a scared cat, he won’t even let me touch him.”

“Okay shit.” Soobin was fully focused now, forgetting any and every worries he’d been having recently in place of trying to help Yeonjun. First, they needed to figure out what was going on, and so far Soobin only had one guess. “It’s… can you let me try something? Let me speak to him.”

Juyeon hummed, sounding glad to let Soobin help him.

“Jjunie?” Soobin began. “Can you hear me?”

After a short pause, Juyeon let out a sigh of relief. “I think it’s working. He’s listening, keep going.”

“Jjunie, everything’s alright,” Soobin continued, forcing his voice to be calm and collected despite how out of breath he was getting from nearly running. “Can you tell me with words how you are feeling?”

There came no answer from Yeonjun, at least not in words, and it fit well with Soobin’s theory. Juyeon’s words after that only confirmed it even more. “I don’t think he understands what we are saying. This is… what is going on, Soobin?”

“It’s complicated,” Soobin said. He had to stop at a crossroads to wait for the green light and allowed himself a moment to breathe. “It’s a werewolf thing, let’s just say. It’s a very vulnerable state, so you have to make sure he doesn’t bolt and that no one else gets too close before I arrive.”

“Okay, I can do that. But how long will it take you?”

The light turned green, and Soobin sped off at an even faster pace than before. “Not too long. Ten minutes, maybe less. I hope.”

As there was nothing else Soobin could help with while on the phone, they chose to end the call so Soobin could focus on getting there quickly. He tried his best to not run, not wanting to be out of energy when he reached them, but it was hard.

Guilt threatened to overtake him as he thought back on the last 24 hours. He’d been in his head a lot, had assumed a lot of things from Yeonjun’s side without fully knowing, and without giving Yeonjun the chance to talk. He’d left Yeonjun’s side, had taken the coward’s way out by fleeing and staying away, thinking only of himself. Why had he done that? Why had he been so selfish?

It wasn’t his fault that Yeonjun was in a compromised situation right now, but it might just as well be. He had left him. He just needed to get there, to get to Yeonjun’s side and to make sure that everything was fine again.

Soobin lost all sense of time as he was rushing down the streets. It felt like too much time had passed, though logically it couldn’t have been more than a few minutes. Then, finally, finally, he made the last turn, and caught sight of them further down the street.

He’d only met Juyeon once, briefly, but he recognized him instantly. He was standing looking down at a Yeonjun who was sitting cross legged on the cold ground—the sight immediately made a pang of worry shoot through Soobin.

Why was he sitting on the ground? It was chilly outside, he should get his cute ass off the ground before he caught a cold.

As he was getting closer, his view of Yeonjun cleared, and he gasped as he realized the exposed position he was in. His neck tilted, offered to anyone in near proximity. The sight made something stir in Soobin’s gut, and he swallowed thickly, looking around. He was glad to see there were no other people around right now.

He was nearing them when an idea hit him. He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea or not, yet, but he was willing to try it out for Yeonjun’s sake.

So, Soobin ripped the scent blockers from his neck and wrists, exposing his scent glands. Quickly, he rubbed the spots to try and get the production going, as he closed in on the two figures in his sight.

Soobin knew that Yeonjun and Juyeon had noticed him when a sound close to a whine rang through the air, followed by swift movement before him. The next thing he knew, he was hit by a body slamming into him, almost causing the both of them to topple over.

Yeonjun was all over Soobin in an instant, his nose buried in Soobin’s neck and his hands scurrying up and down Soobin’s back. On reflex, Soobin’s hands found Yeonjun’s hips, and they stayed there.

He was like a wild animal, all taking and no giving. There was a constant, low sound coming from him that resembled that of a cat, almost like purring. It all but confirmed Soobin’s theory about what was going on.

“Soobin?”

Juyeon had caught up, panting slightly after having had to run after Yeonjun when he had bolted away like that.

“Yes, hi,” Soobin said, giving Juyeon a sheepish smile. He tried to not let himself succumb to the embarrassment of standing stiff as a board there while Yeonjun was basically feeling him up in the middle of the street.

“Oh thank god.” Juyeon sighed in obvious relief, sagging a little as he bent over, his hands on his knees. He was quiet for a few moments, catching his breath. All that time, though, his eyes were locked firmly on the two of them in front of him, and Soobin felt scrutinized under that gaze. He wondered what it must look like to Juyeon, who barely knew anything about their dynamic. “Is he going to be alright? He’s been like this for a while now.”

Soobin’s hands instinctively tightened their grip around Yeonjun when Juyeon’s eyes focused on him. The omega had slightly calmed down at this point, it was only his nose that was still moving, rubbing up and down against Soobin’s neck and then switching to the other side when he seemed satisfied with the first.

“He’s safe with me,” Soobin answered. He glanced down at what parts of Yeonjun he could see from their close position. “He just needs a calm environment to get back into a lucid mindstate,” he added, remembering how Taehyun had taken him back to Yeonjun’s apartment when he’d lost his control in a similar way not that long ago.

“So you know what’s going on with him?”

“Yeah, I think I do.” For his own sake, he rubbed the skin at Yeonjun’s hip, as if using the sensation to remind himself that this was all real. Yeonjun was really there. He tried to think of what could have happened to get him in this state, but his mind came up blank. Instead, he asked Juyeon to explain. 

Juyeon rubbed both hands over his face, and only then did Soobin notice that they were shaking quite violently. “After we had dinner at a place further down the street, we said we would go for dessert. But there was a group of people there, and I think Yeonjun smelled something that reminded him of the time he was kidnapped? Roses, I think he said. So we hurried away from there, but it wasn’t long before we realized that the same group had followed us. And I–I” Juyeon stuttered, probably he was still in shock as well. “I recognized some of them. They were guards, in there , you know. So we left the place, but of course they followed us. They were clearly trying something, but I don’t know if they were just trying to size us up or actually trying to take us again. But um, I started screaming for help, basically, and Yeonjun he… he lashed out. His eyes were blue, and he went ballistic, scratching, kicking, basically pushing them all back. Then when other people arrived– witnesses –they ran. Disappeared down the road. I tried to leave, because no way it’s safe to stay here, but that’s when Yeonjun sat down and refused to move. And that’s when I called you.”

“Fuck.” 

“Yeah.”

“Juyeon I…” Soobin instinctively held Yeonjun just a little tighter, the mere thought of knowing what had just transpired shaking him to the core. “I can’t thank you enough for being there and for staying with him. I don’t know what I would’ve done if–”

“Hey, it’s okay. Nothing happened,” Juyeon reassured him. “And evidently, he can defend himself.”

Soobin smiled proudly at that. He was just about to say something, when suddenly, the sensation at his scent gland shifted. Soobin sucked in a sharp breath as he realized that Yeonjun had started licking at the skin now. An involuntary shiver ran down his spine, and he tried to step away from Yeonjun quickly before the situation escalated. But Yeonjun wouldn’t have that, his grip around Soobin only tightening.

Soobin raised one arm from Yeonjun’s waist and gently placed it behind his back, carefully trying to pull him back. “Jjunie?” he asked, trying to get any sort of response out of him. The moment he saw Yeonjun’s eyes, though—pupils dilated and gaze unfocused, his irises a clear blue color and reflecting the light from the buildings close by—he knew that Yeonjun was as good as gone.

Soobin was sure his face was flaming red as he looked back at Juyeon, who was looking between them thoughtfully. “Juyeon, I think I need to take him home.”

“Of course,” Juyeon answered, his expression shifting, showing just how worried he was. “You seem to know what to do, so please, do what you can. Do you need my help to get him home?”

After considering it for two seconds, Soobin bent his knees and easily picked Yeonjun up, bridal style. The omega let out a wordless yelp, but not an unsatisfactory one, and instantly snuggled up against Soobin’s neck.

“We’ll be okay,” Soobin said, trying to ignore the way his own alpha instincts were roaring with satisfaction right now, “his apartment is not that far from here. I’ll make sure he’s safe.”

“Okay. Thank you for coming to help.”

Soobin shook his head. “Thank you for calling me. It’s not great for an omega to get into this… state alone, especially not around strangers.”

“Oh.” Juyeon eyed Yeonjun, seeming to understand that there was something going on that he didn’t fully know about. He took a deep breath. “Okay, you should go. Please text me when you’re home, Yeonjun has my number.”

The walk home after leaving Juyeon took maybe 20 minutes, maybe even longer, considering Soobin was walking as slowly and carefully as he dared, so as to not distress the omega in his arms. Though Yeonjun seemed quite content in his arms, and not even when he was walking up the stairs and struggling to get the apartment door open with his arms full did he react.

The first few minutes of the walk, he had tried to talk to Yeonjun, to see if he could pull any kind of answer out of him, but he had remained silent and up in the clouds the whole time.

When he finally managed to get the door open, Soobin nearly sagged, but since he was still holding Yeonjun in his arms he forced himself to remain strong. 

Soobin startled when Yeonjun suddenly thrashed around in his arms, acting like a cat trying to push against Soobin’s neck. It dawned on him after three seconds that Yeonjun was trying to scent him. His omegan instincts didn’t seem to know that he was still wearing scent blockers, preventing Yeonjun’s scent from being shared.

In a moment of weakness, Soobin imagined himself throwing Yeonjun on the couch and ripping those damn scent blockers off with his teeth, like he’d wanted to do since that very day when he’d made Yeonjun wear them for the first time. It had been weeks since he last smelled Yeonjun sweet, intoxicating scent at its fullest, and in this moment there was nothing Soobin wanted more than to have his and Yeonjun’s scents mixing together.

Soobin caught himself almost slipping into a dangerous headspace himself, and forcefully shook himself out of it. He needed to figure out what to do next, and decided on gently placing Yeonjun down on the couch, removing him from his arms.

A loud whine sounded through the air of their small apartment as soon as Soobin’s hands stopped touching the omega. He’d planned to quickly run and grab something for Yeonjun to drink, but Yeonjun’s hands shot out to grab his shirt, preventing him from moving too far away.

Carefully, he placed his own hands over Yeonjun’s, prying his grip around the shirt off gently. He then lowered himself to a squat, so that he was on the same level as Yeonjun when looking him in the eye. Yeonjun looked so innocent, so slack and expressionless that it almost pained Soobin to see him like this. Yeonjun, who was usually so expressive, both in body language and speech, was now wiped clean.

“Hyung, I’m just gonna get you something to drink,” he explained, trying to get Yeonjun to release him. It only served to make Yeonjun start to shake, his entire body entering some kind of distressed state, and it made Soobin panic. “Hyung! It’s okay, I’m just going to the kitchen.”

Soobin kept looking at Yeonjun, who still wouldn’t stop shaking, when it hit him. He was speaking in ways Yeonjun couldn’t understand right now, so he needed to find a way to get through to him.

He bent down so their faces were on the same level, looking Yeonjun straight in the eyes. Without needing to think, his next move came instinctively, hands moving on their own accord. His hand came up to Yeonjun’s left cheek and gently caressed his soft skin. “Shh, it’s alright. Alpha is right here.”

He stared into Yeonjun’s pretty, dark eyes, waiting for any kind of recognition to appear. It was hard for him to focus, though. Being this close to Yeonjun, their faces lined up perfectly, made Soobin’s skin tingle with anticipation. Before he knew it, his gaze lowered to Yeonjun’s plump, pink lips. The lips he had dreamt of kissing, the lips he was now running his thumb over. They were so soft, so full and firm. They were perfect.

“Ah–” Soobin startled at the sudden sound escaping Yeonjun, barely able to pull his eyes away from the sight of Yeonjun’s open mouth. He looked up, expecting to see an expressive look in Yeonjun’s eyes, perhaps a judging one, but there was still only that vacant look there.

Yeonjun swallowed once, his head bending forward as he did so, as if it took a lot of effort. When he opened his mouth again, Soobin realized that Yeonjun was trying to speak despite how far below the surface his consciousness seemed to be.

“A-alpha?”

Soobin’s heart might have just jumped out of his chest. That, or someone shoved their fist into his chest, squeezing his heart so hard it almost hurt. It was hard to put words to this feeling or where it was coming from. Just… seeing Yeonjun so vulnerable, it created a crater of conflict inside him. Because he was just so… aghghh Soobin was a little bit too in love with him to not feel any sort of jolt of pleasure from hearing Yeonjun say that word, in that tone.

Now was not the time to let himself indulge, though. He needed to take care of Yeonjun, nurse him back into a healthy mindspace.

“My omega,” he said, the words just slipping out as he ran his thumb up Yeonjun’s cheek. “Will you wait as Alpha gets you a drink from the kitchen? Alpha will be right back.”

To Soobin’s surprise, Yeonjun nodded obediently, and then the tight grip he’d kept around Soobin vanished. As Soobin straightened, Yeonjun leaned back on the couch and pulled his legs up, so that he could hug them while Soobin was gone. He looked a little like a puppy waiting for their owner to give them a treat. It was the cutest fucking thing Soobin had ever seen.

With urgency, Soobin ran to the kitchen and turned the kettle on. Some warm tea might be good for Yeonjun, since he doubted he’d be able to get any food into him in this state.

In the time it took for the water to boil, he prepared the teacup, and then settled against the counter, contemplating what to do next.

He could call Taehyun and ask him what he did to coax him out of alpha space but… Soobin had a feeling this was totally different. He hadn’t been that deep under back then; he had been able to answer Taehyun and realize he needed to calm down. Yeonjun was way past that level. He was almost animalistic, and if it hadn’t been for that one word he’d spoken just now, Soobin would have been worried he wouldn’t be able to pull him out.

Well, he still was a little bit worried. Maybe he should do some research, but honestly he didn’t think there would be much information to find. Werewolf research was very limited even in their modern times, and Soobin just knew that anything regarding omegas would be even more rare. But if he had to resort to using his phone, he would do so. Anything to help Yeonjun, because he knew how scary it could be to lose awareness and control.

He at least knew he had to be careful, because a person in omega or alpha space was submitted to their more… animal instincts. Soobin wasn’t fully aware what that meant for an omega, but he could guess. And he definitely didn’t want Yeonjun to do something that he would later come to regret. Which meant he would have to stop Yeonjun from trying to make any sort of move. But it also meant having to control himself should Yeonjun make any suggestive moves on him. And that would be equally hard (no pun intended).

When the water was ready, Soobin prepared the tea quickly, not wanting to leave Yeonjun alone another second if he didn’t have to.

Once back in the living room, he almost cooed at the sight of his Hyung, sitting in the exact same position as earlier, waiting so obediently for his return. His eyes visibly lit up when he noticed Soobin’s presence.

“Hi hyung, did you miss me?” Soobin asked playfully, of course getting no response back. He placed the tea in front of Yeonjun before going to sit at a respectable distance from Yeonjun, only for the omega to scoot over to him the moment his butt hit the cushion. “Hey you—”

Soobin jerked when strong arms wrapped around his midpart, and lips came in touch with his neck. Shivers ran down his spine in an instant, and it took all he had to sit still and not react.

Yeonjun was nuzzling, licking, then kissing, at Soobin’s neck, and Soobin’s insides went near feral. How could they not; he had dreamed about this for longer than he dared admit. But there was a distinct difference between this reality and his imagination; in his dreams, Yeonjun was kissing him willingly, because he wanted to. Not because his omega instincts forced him close to the only alpha in his vicinity.

“Hyung,” Soobin panted as he tried to keep his eyes from falling shut at the fantastic feeling of Yeonjun’s lips against his skin. Especially because he seemed to be an expert in finding his scent gland. “Hyung, please.” He knew he had to act, had to take control over the situation, but it was hard. Harder than he thought it would be. “Hyung you should—”

A sharp sting shocked Soobin’s system, forcing his eyes wide open in panic and his hands pushing Yeonjun away.

Fuck. Yeonjun just bit him. In the neck.

He felt around at the spot Yeonjun’s teeth had attacked him and breathed a sigh of relief when he realized they hadn’t pierced his skin. They were okay. No threat of a mating bite. Not that Soobin didn’t want one, but he’d rather die than get mated with Yeonjun under circumstances like this.

A whining sound from the floor pulled his attention to the sad, pouting Yeonjun looking up at him.

“Oh Hyung! I’m sorry,” he said, yearning to reach out to him but not wanting to get in a similar situation again. Carefully, he took Yeonjun’s hands in his. “I’m sorry for pushing you away. But you can’t do that, okay? If I let you hug me, will you promise to not bite again?”

He had no idea if Yeonjun actually understood what those words meant, but still he felt satisfied when Yeonjun nodded in agreement. Soobin pulled him up on the couch again, opening his arms for him.

With a happy sound slipping past his lips, Yeonjun jumped straight into Soobin’s lap, straddling him.

“Uff,” Soobin let out a strangled sound before he regained his composure. “You’re such a big baby,” he teased into Yeonjun’s shoulder, ruffling his hair.

They looked at each other, Soobin with gentle, loving eyes and Yeonjun with animalistic, unseeing ones. Soobin wished he could know what was going on in Yeonjun’s head, if there were any thoughts at all or if he wouldn’t remember a single thing the next morning.

They sat like that, Yeonjun straddling Soobin, for a long time. Soobin’s scent was filling the air as he couldn’t help the pheromones he was emitting. They were meant to calm Yeonjun, but they seemed to be doing more than just that, judging by the way Yeonjun’s gaze was turning darker with every passing moment. Soobin didn’t notice, simply finding comfort in embracing Yeonjun like that. He was almost about to fall asleep; it was so comfortable.

Soobin was fully unprepared then, when Yeonjun ripped his own scent blockers off, revealing the sweet scent of his aroused omega. He sucked in a sharp breath, eyes flying open as he took in the scent he had gone so long without.

He had to be really careful now to keep himself under control, as Yeonjun’s scent was billowing around him. 

“Hyung,” he said, voice coming out quieter than expected, close to a whisper. His hands found their way down to Yeonjun’s hips, aiming to lift him off his lap. Yeonjun resisted, whining when Soobin tried to move him, and locked his own arms around Soobin’s waist in retaliation.

Soobin’s eyes widened when Yeonjun’s hips suddenly grinded down on him, sending a sharp wave of arousal through him. “Fuck,” he groaned, his hands momentarily gripping Yeonjun, hard, before he realized what he was doing. “Fuck, hyung, stop.” 

Yeonjun didn’t stop so easily. He leaned over Soobin, knocking their foreheads together and letting out small whimpering breaths as he repeated the same grinding motion. 

This was bad. No, not bad. Awful. Because Yeonjun was Soobin’s wet dream, and hearing the way he sounded when their dicks rubbed against each other nearly made Soobin feral. 

It felt like something inside of him snapped, multiplying the amount of effort it suddenly took for him to keep himself from reciprocating. He imagined throwing Yeonjun on his back on the couch, then leaning down, on top of him, and tasting every single part of Yeonjun’s body. 

He blinked, awareness trickling slowly back in when Yeonjun moaned loudly. Soobin froze, the blood in his veins turning ice cold, as he realized he hadn’t just imagined it. Because what he was seeing was Yeonjun, on his back, shirt sliding up to reveal most of his abdomen. Soobin’s hands still holding his hips, dangerously close to sliding underneath Yeonjun’s tight pants. 

Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck–

Soobin ripped himself away, until he fell off the couch and hit the floor. Hard. Painful. Which was good. Pain was good, because it kept him centered. It was something to focus on when his control was slipping through his fingers. 

“Hyung,” he said, standing to look at Yeonjun. He forced himself to keep his gaze steady on Yeonjun’s face, to not let it wander. Screw the fact that he was half hard in his pants, Yeonjun was still completely gone, and he had done absolutely nothing to help him out of it. 

“Hyung,” he said once more, needing Yeonjun to hear him. He didn’t even realize that he slipped into his alpha voice until he saw Yeonjun jerk, eyes suddenly focused entirely on him.  

“Come hyung,” Soobin said, holding out a hand, “I think we should go to bed.”

Maybe the best option was to get him to fall asleep. Yeah, that would probably do it. Sleep and then everything would be better in the morning. 

He hoped. 

Even though he didn’t use his alpha voice to command it, Yeonjun took Soobin’s hand and let him pull him to his feet. Gently, Soobin ushered Yeonjun over to the bed, being careful to touch him as little as possible as they walked. 

Yeonjun stopped a step before they reached the bed, refusing to budge when Soobin pulled on his hand. Soobin didn’t know what else to do–he had run out of patience and energy a while ago now–so he ended up lifting Yeonjun, one hand under his thigh, the other behind his back, only to lay him down on his side of the bed. Yeonjun whined for a whole second before he realized he was suddenly (technically) under Soobin again. Instantly, he let out a seductive mewl, hands making grabby motions as if aiming to pull Soobin down onto the bed with him.

“Shh,” Soobin said, smiling despite himself. This whole situation was so absurd, Soobin could almost convince himself he was hallucinating, or that this was all just a very vivid dream of his. Because how could this be real? This, a mirror image of Soobin’s daydreams. Yeonjun, compliant and ready, looking up at him with those dreamy eyes, begging for Soobin to just—

Forcefully, Soobin jerked himself out of those dangerous thoughts, again . With every passing second, this was getting harder and harder for him. He really had to get the control back; over himself or over the situation, he didn’t know. 

Realizing he’d been frozen still for several seconds, Soobin shook himself back into motion. 

When he wasn’t given any attention, Yeonjun changed tactics. Suddenly, Soobin was hit with the omega’s strong pheromones once again, so unexpectedly that his hands fisted the covers he’d been in the process of moving to cover Yeonjun. 

“Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath, suddenly thankful for the fact that Yeonjun couldn’t comprehends words right now. Likely, Yeonjun wouldn’t remember what happened tonight—which was reason enough for Soobin to shut this all down real fast.

“Hyung, stop that.” He said, placing the covers down, only to sigh tiredly when Yeonjun, like a petulant child, kicked his feet out to get the covers off. Well then, he had to pull out the alpha voice once more, though this time intentionally. 

“Stop . Lay down.”

The command hit Yeonjun forcefully, and he followed without a single doubt. His face went slack after his head hit the pillow, and his eyes focused on Soobin, as if he was awaiting new orders. Soobin hated using that voice on him, hated forcing him to do anything, but right now he was desperate.

“Good job,” he told his hyung, hoping that praise would help lessen any potential tension in his muscles that made Yeonjun so obedient. He pulled the covers back over Yeonjun, and hummed in satisfaction when the omega didn’t move to remove it.

For a second, he contemplated going through his nightly routine, but immediately he squashed down that thought, assuming Yeonjun would grow upset again if he left his side for even a minute. So, instead of brushing his teeth and changing into sleep clothes, he decided to just get in next to Yeonjun. He only paused briefly to throw his jeans off to make it more comfortable.

His intention was to keep a good distance between them, but Yeonjun wouldn’t have that. Of course not.

Before he knew it, Soobin had a warm Yeonjun spooning him from behind, his legs drawled over him and his hands tickling underneath his shirt. It wasn’t completely foreign to him – he had been best friends with Yeonjun since forever, after all – but somehow this time it felt less platonic than he was used to. But maybe it was just an effect of this whole absurd situation. Soobin was probably reading too much from it. No, he was definitely reading too much into it, because he knew Yeonjun wasn’t lucid right now. But still, his bruised heart couldn’t help but feel hopeful.

As he felt Yeonjun hum contentedly against the back of his neck, Soobin’s thoughts drifted. He imagined Yeonjun waking up to them cuddling and getting a stomach full of butterflies. Of Yeonjun smiling and pulling his arms tighter around Soobin, kissing Soobin’s neck as he whispered sweet nothings in Soobin’s ear to wake him.

If only hope wasn’t so heartbreakingly painful at times.

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

The process of waking up was slow and drawn out, his senses returning to him one by one. He wasn’t aware of anything just yet, didn’t know what time it was, what day it was, or even where he was, only that he was extremely comfortable right now.

The first sense to return to him was touch. He felt warm, soft skin against his own, and his immediate reaction was to snuggle up tighter against that comfortable heat. His arms were wrapped around something, his legs tightly locked in place by something else, yet Yeonjun didn’t feel a tiny bit of discomfort. In fact, he felt very satisfied, especially because his hands could roam free over the smooth surface they were placed on.

Next, he noticed the smell. Oh lord, the smell. It was strong and all-consuming, wrapping around him like a protective cocoon, making him almost lull back to sleep. 

Sounds only returned to him when, after running his hands up and down that soft skin, his own hummings became noticeable to him. Then, mere seconds later, a low groan started close to his ear, a sound so familiar it managed to fully awaken him in a moment’s notice.

Eyes flicking open in shock, Yeonjun nearly gasped when he saw Soobin’s face mere centimeters from his own. Soobin, who’s eyes were fluttering, whose nose was scrunching up cutely as he too was slowly coming awake.

Realization hit Yeonjun then, hard . The skin against his skin, the soft heat under his hands, it was Soobin . It was Soobin’s back he was running his hands over, and Soobin’s legs that were tangled up with his own. To top it all off, they were so close, so perfectly lined up that not only were their chests touching, but so were their crotches.

Don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic.

Only, when Soobin’s eyes finally flickered open, Yeonjun very much did panic.

He jerked backwards, trying to at least get some distance between them, because if he continued to think about all the parts of them that were touching right now he would have a full meltdown, or worse, get hard-

“Oh, Hyung,” Soobin said, concern painting his face as his gaze flickered around Yeonjun’s face, as if searching for something. “Are you back?”

Yeonjun blinked at him in confusion. “What? Back from where?”

Soobin sighed in obvious relief. "Oh, thank god.”

Still very confused, and very much aware of the way his legs were still stuck in between Soobin’s (he hadn’t been able to pull away very far), Yeonjun cleared his throat. “Um… would you mind explaining what’s going on?” He thought back to the last thing he remembered from the day before, but either his mind was still hazy from sleep, or he’d somehow blocked out that whole memory. All he knew was he’d gone out to see Juyeon, in an attempt to distract himself from the emotions brewing inside him after Soobin had left him .

The whole situation became even more confusing to him now. What the hell had happened? The last time he saw Soobin, he’d been mad at him. He’d refused to talk to him, and then he’d stayed away all night, ignoring each and every one of Yeonjun’s calls. 

And now here he suddenly was, cuddling Yeonjun in his sleep? What the hell had he missed?

“How did I get home?”

Soobin studied his face before answering. “Do you remember anything?” Yeonjun shook his head. With a sigh, Soobin slowly moved out of Yeonjun’s arms to sit up. He looked down at Yeonjun, looking completely calm and showing nothing of the distress Yeonjun was feeling inside. “I’ll explain over breakfast, sound good?”

As soon as he got a small nod from Yeonjun, Soobin basically dragged Yeonjun out of bed. To his surprise, the alpha kept their hands locked as they entered the kitchen, moving around and grabbing everything he needed with his free right hand. Yeonjun barely knew what was going on—was he still dreaming?

Yeonjun watched him fry eggs and cut up fruits—when the knives came out, Yeonjun pointedly pulled his hand out of Soobin’s grip, for safety’s sake. Barely any words were shared between them, but it mattered very little.

When he noticed Soobin was plating the food, he moved away so he could turn on the coffee machine. A second later, he let out a surprised yelp as Soobin’s arms wrapped themselves around his middle.

Soobin was hugging him from behind? When was the last time he did that, when they were five?

“S-Soobin?” Yeonjun questioned, voice coming out a little higher than he’d hoped for.

The younger man just hummed against his neck. “Sorry, it’s just. You smell so good, and my alpha’s still upset since yesterday.”

“Yesterday?”

Soobin’s nose rubbing against Yeonjun’s scent gland made a shiver down his back. “I’ll tell you. Just… let me scent you?”

Fuck, he for sure must still be dreaming. This couldn’t be real. Soobin, asking to scent him? Soobin, who had been the one to ask Yeonjun to block out his scent, who’d taken months to even admit that he enjoyed Yeonjun’s scent. That Soobin was now asking to scent him? It didn’t make sense at all. Fuck, Yeonjun wasn’t even that wellversed in this whole thing just yet, but he still knew that this was odd behaviour.

He didn’t want to point that out, though, in case he was somehow interpreting this situation completely wrong.

Soobin didn’t wait for approval. He smoothly turned Yeonjun around in his arms, bringing them face to face and giving Yeonjun a perfect view of the alpha’s eyes. They were hooded, nearly closed, as Soobin grabbed Yeonjun’s right hand and lifted it to his neck. He rubbed Yeonjun’s scent gland against the one on one side of his neck. Then, he did the same with the other hand.

Yeonjun gasped when Soobin’s head dipped even closer to him. The intense look in his eyes almost made Yeonjun think he was leaning down to kiss him—only to at the last moment dive to the side to get access to Yeonjun’s neck.

Suddenly, Yeonjun became very much aware of his own heart beating forcefully inside his chest, as if trying to escape. He was holding his breath, frozen in shock as he waited for Soobin to do something.

First there was Soobin’s nose, breathing in against Yeonjun’s skin, then rubbing up and down for some seconds. He moved again, then, until their neck scent glands were touching.

Goosebumps erupted across Yeonjun’s skin, and he couldn’t help the shiver running down his back. It was just so… intimate, in a way Yeonjun wasn’t used to. Soobin had never hugged him like this before, had never initiated so much touch with him before, and he had a hard time not getting drunk from it all.

It went on for a minute, maybe two, Yeonjun wasn’t keeping count, until Soobin seemed satisfied. After sighing against Yeonjun’s skin, he took a slow step back. Just like Yeonjun was feeling, he looked a little dazed from the experience.

To Yeonjun’s frustration, Soobin acted like nothing happened, moving to bring their breakfast plates over to the living room. Yeonjun followed, not knowing what else to do, by pouring them some coffee and bringing them over to the couch.

Yeonjun had just put his things down when Soobin pulled him down to sit as close to him as possible.

“Soobin,” Yeonjun said with a laugh, hiding his face slightly as he felt his cheeks warm up.

“Sorry.”

Realizing he was quite hungry, Yeonjun dug into the food as he waited for Soobin to start explaining. Eventually, after staring at Yeonjun chewing for ten seconds, Soobin did.

“Yesterday, you know you went out with Juyeon?” Yeonjun nodded. “Okay, so, he called me when you were out with him. He said you were distressed and that he didn’t know what to do, so I came and took you home with me.”

“Distressed?” Yeonjun really didn’t remember this. “What happened?”

“He said you ran into some guys that you recognized from… that place?” Soobin’s hand suddenly landed on Yeonjun’s thigh, and Yeonjun had to fight to not show his shock on his face. To Soobin, it seemed like he didn’t even notice that he’d done it, which only made everything stranger to Yeonjun. “But maybe it’s better you ask Juyeon about it.”

Soobin looked down to Yeonjun’s neck, gaze going distant for a moment as he seemed to think something through.

“You, uh—” he started, eyes dragging their way up to Yeonjun's face again, “you remember when I went into Alpha space? At that café?”

“Yeah?”

“That’s… kinda what happened to you, only you went much deeper than I did back then.”

“I went into alpha space?”

“Well, for you it’d be omega space; though–” Soobin pursed his mouth thoughtfully, “I don’t really know if there’s any difference. Did you go through it with Beomgyu?”

“Not in a lecture, no.”

Soobin nodded, frowning slightly. “It’s a bit hard to explain, because it’s not really known exactly how it works.” He leaned back slightly in his seat, sighing as he continued. “Some believe that we could transform into wolves, a long time ago, and that’s why we are called werewolves. The story—or myth, legend, I don’t really know what it is—says that with time, we lost the ability to transform, but some part of that animal side still lingered with us. Supposedly, the animal side is like a primal side of us that mostly comes out as our strong instincts. But sometimes, that side takes over, like in moments when our survival is being threatened.

“So, basically, what happened to you was you went through such deep rooted distress that your ‘omega side’ took over, in order to protect you. It’s like the fight or flight reaction, just more extreme. You um,” Soobin rubbed at the back of his neck, “you were really out of it, when I got to you. You didn’t understand what I was saying, and you wouldn’t let me leave your side.”

While hearing that was embarrassing, it was much milder than Yeonjun initially worried. “That’s…” he didn’t really know what to say to that. He kind of pictured himself acting like a toddler, attaching himself to Soobin’s leg and refusing to let go. “Was I a lot to handle?”

“Hm?” Soobin looked genuinely surprised by the question. He smiled, and Yeonjun wondered if he was imagining things, or if Soobin’s cheeks really were flaming red suddenly.  “No uh, of course not, Hyung.” He cleared his throat. “I was just happy Juyeon called me so that nothing happened to you while you were in that state.”

Nodding thoughtfully, Yeonjun couldn't stop himself from asking, “and you said ‘your alpha’ was upset since yesterday?”

“Oh, that. Yes.” Soobin bit down nervously on his bottom lip. Yeonjun couldn’t keep his eyes off them, not even when Soobin started talking again. “Um, it’s like a primal urge to take care of you. Seeing you in that state was pretty upsetting, even if I knew you were safe here. I’m glad you’re out of that headspace now.”

Warmth spread through Yeonjun’s chest. “I’m sorry,” he said, leaning into Soobin’s side to hug him. “For upsetting you.”

Soobin just shook his head at him. He reached towards the table and grabbed a slice of apple, offering it to Yeonjun by holding it up to his mouth. Yeonjun moved to grab it, but found that that wasn’t Soobin’s intention. He moved his hand away from Yeonjun’s, letting out a dissatisfied grunt that made Yeonjun realise what he wanted. 

Thankful that Soobin wasn’t seeing his face, Yeonjun opened his mouth to accept the piece. Soobin hummed in content as he was allowed to feed the omega.

They continued eating their breakfast like that, Soobin feeding most of it to Yeonjun by hand, barely taking anything for himself. At one point, Yeonjun realized that the only way to get something in Soobin was for him to use the same tactic. He tried his best not to think too much about what was going on, because frankly he didn’t know what to make out of it. Soobin was acting strangely out of character, he couldn’t help thinking, but he was too embarrassed to ask him about it.

Soobin’s desire for skinship persisted even after they finished their breakfast. When Yeonjun got off his lap, he grabbed his hand asking him where he was going. “I’m just going to the bathroom,” he assured him, wondering why Soobin was looking so distraught.

Was it still that thing about his alpha being upset since yesterday? It must be, because Yeonjun had literally never seen Soobin acting like this before. Sure, he had his touchy moments, and he never shied away from Yeonjun’s approaches, but this was all some next level stuff. 

Not that Yeonjun was complaining. He really wasn’t, he just… worried. Since becoming an omega, he’d learnt just how hard it could be sometimes to be a werewolf. How everything could easily turn into a trigger, and how easily small things could affect you. Not only that, he’d also realized just how easy it was to lose control of your behaviour without realising it—as he’d seen when he’d experienced preheat.

So, now that Soobin was behaving oddly, Yeonjun couldn’t help but worry that something was going on.

Still, he didn’t know what to do about it. He supposed he could ask Soobin about it, but maybe the younger wasn’t even aware of what was going on.

In the bathroom, Yeonjun eyed the shower longingly, and quickly stripped out of his shirt. Only, when the fabric fluttered around him before falling to the ground, he caught a whiff of a scent that was both familiar and not.

Incense and vanilla, mixed with something floral that Yeonjun couldn’t put his finger on. He also couldn’t get enough of it. The longer he sniffed the air, the more lost in that mix of smells he became. He lifted the shirt, diving his nose into the fabric instantly and sucking in large gulps of air through his nose desperately. It was strong on the shirt, but not so much that the scents could be coming from there.

It took Yeonjun a minute of confusion to connect the dots. When he did, he lifted his wrist to his nose, eyes widening and pupils dilating as he realized what it was.

This was how his and Soobin’s scents smelled, mixed together. Amber and flowers, that was what Beomgyu had said. And now he was smelling something akin to amber, mixed with Soobin’s incense and a hint of something sweet to top it all off.

Fuck, Yeonjun had no idea why he could suddenly smell himself, but logical thought were blown out of his head right now. He cared very little about realistic explanations, only craved to have more of that intoxicating smell.

Suddenly, the shower was a no go. No way was he going to wash away his new favourite smell mere minutes after acquiring it just because he was feeling sweaty. It wasn’t the worst ever. He could deal with it. He would deal with it. 

Soobin had never scented him before. Not like this, and definitely not when Yeonjun was aware of it. Recently, it had come to his attention that Soobin most likely had been secretly scenting him all their life, since he had a distinct feeling that Soobin would often rub his nose up Yeonjun’s neck when they were hugging. That, or he would touch their wrists together before going to grab Yeonjun’s hand.

He didn’t know why it had taken Soobin months of Yeonjun being an omega before doing it again. At first, Yeonjun had been afraid that Soobin found his new scent appalling, and that that was why he made sure to not surround himself with it. Then, after that night when Soobin went into alpha space, he’d admitted that he apparently loved Yeonjun’s scent, and Yeonjun’s understanding of the situation had been completely blown to pieces.

He wished that he was braver than he was, that he dared to just ask Soobin about it, but he was still so sensitive about all these things that the mere thought of Soobin shutting him down made him want to cry. So, until now he’d been living in denial, trying not to think too much about whatever it was that was making Soobin avoid his scent so much.

Today, it was hard to ignore it. No, actually, he couldn’t deny it anymore, because now that he’d gotten a taste of how it could be to be scented by Soobin, he needed to know what Soobin thought. Somehow, the thought of himself going around smelling like Soobin made the part of him that was always anxious, always uneasy, suddenly quiet down. It was like he’d been wrapped in a cocoon of security, just by being scented by Soobin.

What if Soobin didn’t want to do it again? Would that be okay? Would he accept that? If he was being honest, it would crush a tiny part of him—or perhaps, a pretty large part of him, at this point—but it would ultimately be okay. He hoped.

Yeonjun took his time in the bathroom, not because he was getting ready for bed, but because he was having a bit of mental gymnastics to deal with. He wouldn’t call it a mental breakdown, because it was nowhere near the levels of breakdown he’d been through previously, but it was also not a very sane sort of mental state he was going through in there. Only when the sound of Soobin’s voice calling out, asking why he was taking so much time, did Yeonjun realize what he’d gone in there to do.

He brushed his teeth and did his business, skipping the shower and just putting his old shirt back on before leaving the bathroom behind.

When he came out, he stopped abruptly in his tracks, rendered speechless by what he was seeing.

Soobin, standing by the open window next to their bed, fanning himself.