Chapter Text
They leave the resort for the night with the moon high above them, that proud mountain fading into the distance as they huddle together in the back of their hired car. Issay's suit jacket rests loosely around Atsushi's shoulders, but neither of them pay any mind to the chill of the night air as they lean toward each other and pick up where they left off on their moonlit walk. Off to the side, the dividing panel clicks into place to grant them their privacy, and Atsushi smiles against Issay's mouth as the older man's hands wander over him.
"Are you sure you aren't too tired for tonight?" he asks, his voice a whisper, and releases a low, quiet sound as Issay claims his lips once again rather than immediately answering him. His own hands slide upward, resting at either side of Issay's neck, and he feels a shiver pass through him in response to the gentle sweep of Issay's tongue across his lips. It makes him wonder how many times Issay has done this for him; how many times has he entertained a request to come over after a long day?
"You asked me to make love to you, kitten," Issay says against him, and the way he says the pet name so gently, so affectionately, leaves goosebumps on Atsuahi's skin in the word's wake. He sounds as hungry for it as Atsushi feels, and when their lips connect again, he has his answer. Issay made him a promise, one which he remains intent to make good on. They kiss again, and Atsushi feels the way that it steals the breath from his lungs. He allows the other man to claim his lips for as long as he is able, breathing shallowly through his nose and taking a quick breath here and there when Issay allows him, but it becomes very clear and very quickly who holds the reins for the last of their night together, and for once he finds that he doesn't care to fight back against it at all.
His hands roam the other man's torso as their kiss continues, tracing his shoulders and sliding down his arms, then idly running up and down his chest. He picks at the buttons of Issay's vest without opening them, coaxing goosebumps in the wake of his touch which make the other man sigh out his pleasure against him, and he hardly notices at all when he is pulled forward into Issay's lap except for where the other man is warm and growing hard beneath him. He presses his weight down against the heat of him, and this earns him a surprised groan from the man beneath him which their driver is sure to hear.
Neither of them are quite fazed by the idea, however, and what began as the simple intention to continue kissing after being required to spend so much time mingling and adhering to rules of politeness and formalities and decorum, becomes something else altogether. It becomes something which truly feels like a release. Forgotten are the awkward and repetitive introductions, the teasing comments about their four year age difference, and the thinly veiled comments which were devised specifically to test Atsushi's devotion to the man who now held him so tightly. All of these thoughts, these memories, these questions, they are sure to return to them later, but Atsushi allows himself to melt into the older man's embrace, lips opening for him, body relaxing for him to be maneuvered as the other man pleases.
Somewhere in the midst of it all, the car ride ends, and Atsushi is left only briefly to stand and wait, flush with arousal and holding Issay's suit jacket tight around himself, before the older man returns to him and ushers him inside. He backs himself up against the door once it is closed after them, allowing Issay's jacket to drop, forgotten, to the floor once he no longer has need of it, and reaches to tangle his fingers into Issay's mane of hair. The kiss which follows is searing and passionate, and he releases a low sound into the other man's mouth as their lips open for one another, Issay's tongue pushing forward to meet his own.
His knees go weak, his legs nearly giving out underneath him, and he disentangles one hand from Issay's hair in favor of holding tightly onto his shoulder instead. He breathes out a laugh even as his head spins, coaxing a smile from the man who stands before him, and he breaks free of their kissing to catch his breath, chest heaving. "Forget what I said about making love," he manages to say, laughing breathlessly at himself. "I want you to fuck me, Issei. Please." His entire body feels warm and desperate for it in ways he cannot articulate, and with their two forms pressed so close to one another, he can feel the way that Issay's body responds in kind.
"You almost never say please," Issay comments with a quiet chickle, his hands roaming boldly down Atsushi's sides, fingers tugging the younger man's shirt free from where it was so neatly tucked in place. "Is this how we're marking the beginning of our relationship? Manners?" He nips at Atsushi's chin as he teases him, smiling, and there is mischief in his eyes when Atsushi meets his gaze.
"It's a special occasion, isnt it?" Atsushi responds, both hands grasping at Issay's shoulders once more. "If you'd rather I be difficult, I can take it back."
"No, there's no taking back manners," Issay replies, going for his jaw line, then his chin, then the hollow of his throat. Atsushi releases a breathless sound and lets his head drop back against the door with a dull thud. "You would still be doing what I want you to, anyway, if you did that."
"You're impossible," Atsushi chuckles, closing his eyes and enjoying the sensations of Issay's lips at his throat. Briefly he recalls the way his neck had looked earlier in the day before he'd covered it with makeup, marred with hickeys and bite marks, and he wonders if Issay will leave him with more. "All you're going to taste is concealer if you keep doing that," he says, tilting his head further to the side, his heartbeat thundering in his ears.
"That's fine," Issay remarks. Neither of them seem to have the patience required for him to take the time to remove the makeup; Issay barely manages to handle his rather expensive clothing decently, with desire and adrenaline rushing in tandem through his veins. He presses his face into the hollow of Atsushi's throat, eyes closing, and takes a few moments to attempt to collect himself.
"Let me move away from the door," Atsushi urges him, nudging a knee between Issay's legs and rubbing his clothed thigh against him, giving both of them a taste of friction which sends little shockwaves down his spine. "That bed in there will be so much better for this, don't you think?"
His claws unsheathe as he drags them down Issay's back, and he clutches onto him as the other man turns them around and makes his way back to his lips, kissing him again and again while pausing only briefly between kisses for flickering glances over Atsushi's shoulder as he maneuvers them to the bedroom. Atsuahi reaches behind himself once they near the door, fumbling it open, and allows Issay to do the honors of kicking it shut after them once both of them are inside. He smiles at him, eyes alight, as they shuffle toward the bed together, stopping just shy of the foot of it for a proper kiss.
Once more, Issay's proving tongue coaxes Atsushi's lips open, and the younger man allows him control of the kiss as the two of them tug haphazardly at one another's clothes. Unbuttoning Issay's vest takes more focus than Atsushi is used to exerting when it comes to undressing him for sex, and allowing him the space to shed it makes kissing awkward and difficult for a few moments, but the work of it becomes easier after that. He pulls at the older man's tie until it comes undone, then tosses it off to the side before it can be used as a blindfold or be otherwise used against him. Issay works on unbuttoning his shirt as he does this, pulling it free from the waistband of his pants, and then after allowing it to drop from his body he returns the favor for the older man.
He backs toward the bed as Issay's fingers reach for his fly and pull at the zipper, and he releases a breathless sound against the other man's mouth as his slacks drop to the floor and Issay palms him through his underwear. Those long fingers caress and tease him through the thin material, and he feels his breath hitch just before he feels Issay's smile against his mouth.
"Don't be mean," he says in a breath, hooking an arm around Issay's shoulders to pull Issay down onto the bed along with him as he drops back onto the mattress. The two of them kiss, hungrily and passionately, and then Issay is forced to break away so that he can shed his own dress pants and kick off his underwear. Once he is bare, he does not hesitate to rejoin Atsushi on the bed, pressing their lower halves together and grinding down against him. He groans, low and deep, and repeats the motion just to feel the way his cock slides against Atsushi's clothed one. He feels him twitch as he hardens, and hears the way that his breath catches in the bsck of his throat. "Fuck," Atsushi says with a gasp, rutting upward into that friction, and heat surges through him as Issay bears his hips down against his own once again.
Everything feels so much more intense, he wants to say, but those words are locked behind a door he can't open, and he is only able to push upward against the man above him, indulging in that pressure, that friction, that delicious spark. I'm starving for you, Issei, he wants to say, but those words are locked behind another door, though he can feel himself clawing at it. One of his hands grasps at the nape of Issay's neck as the two of them move together, the other dragging down his back, fingers curled. Issay groans for him, the sting of blunt fingernails making him shiver and arch downward against the man beneath him, amd the sound of it sends another electric thrill through his entire body.
He could come like this, he realizes, with the tension and anticipation so built up between the two of them, and he hooks a leg around Issay's waist, trapping him there. Issay improvises, snaking a hand between the two of them to ease the younger man's underwear down and out of the way, tugging his length free. Atsushi moans out his relief, rutting upward even though the friction is so incredibly dry - erhaps because it's dry, truthfully - chasing that sensation. Distantly he understands why he feels so desperate for it, but it's lost behind a fog and he has to trust Issay to find it for him.
The older man spits into his palm and reaches between them once more, using his saliva to ease the friction and take the uncomfortable edge away from that pleasure. He ruts forward as if fucking the man beneath him, and Atsushi pushes upward as if meeting him for those thrusts. Precome leaks from the tip of the younger man's length, and Issay uses it to make the slide easier for both of them, though he finds that he is at least able to hold himself back from the edge. Better to let Atsushi have the orgasm he denied himself early in the morning, to allow his thoughts to clear.
"My poor kitten," he whispers as he strokes both of their lengths, watching Atsushi writhe beneath him, feeling his body arch and shift and pull him in closer. "You've been on the edge of this all day, haven't you?" He plants kisses along the younger man's jaw as he speaks to him, nipping at his chin and kissing at his throat. "Don't you worry, my love," he continues, twisting his wrist on every upstroke and releasing a shuddering breath as he keeps himself back from that edge, focusing solely on Atsushi's pleasure. "I've got you, Acchan." His words are a promise, a reverent whisper, and his voice becomes strained as Atsushi's pitches higher, the younger man edging closer to his own release. "I've got you, Acchan," he says again. "Go on, my love. I've got you."
More words are lost behind that fog which Atsushi cannot reach for and cannot articulate, but he doesn't bother chasing them as Issay strokes him to completion, working him over with quick flicks of his wrist, and it only takes another couple of minutes of that focused attention before his pleasure gives way to a release which leaves him dizzy when it's over, and he only distantly reckons with the fact that his orgasm was embarrassingly quick. He ruts lazily into the heat of Issay's hand as it washes over him, his leg muscles tensing and then relaxing where he's pinned Issay against him, and then goes still when it is over, sagging down onto the bed.
Issay kisses fondly at his throat, nuzzling him, whispering hushed praises to him, and he shivers as he feels Issay's hair tickling his chin. "Issei," he says in a breath, lazily dragging a hand down the other man's back, though his claws have retracted for the time being. "Issei," he says again, and the older man hums in response, patiently waiting for him to find his words. "Fuck," is all that escapes him for a moment, but then he finds one of the doors from before, managing to unlock it and swing it open. "I feel like I'm starving for you," he says with a breathless chuckle, earning a smile from the man above him and a kiss to his clavicle. More of that fog clears, and his breathing steadies, and he drops his leg from its place at Issay's waist.
The other man settles into place atop him, kissing his way across his collarbones, and Atsushi feels the weight of his hard cock moving against him as Issay idly rolls his hips. "You aren't going to hear me complaining, kitten," he says warmly, affectionately, and presses a few open mouthed kisses to skin which does not taste sharply of concealer and foundation. "Would you still like me to fuck you?"
Heat flares in Atsushi's gut, and he nods, shifting beneath Issay. "Yes," is his immediate answer. "Yes, I still need you to fuck me."
"Ah, so it's a need now," Issay says idly, nipping at the younger man's skin. "Have we really awakened such a thing in one another, by staking our claim on each other the way we have?" He chuckles lightly as he speaks, but Atsushi does not feel ridiculed. Instead, he feels something coiling within him at the thought of even partially belonging to the man who rests above him. "You liked that, hm?" Issay questions, reaching down between them to better align their lengths. Atsushi only distantly realizes that his own come is being used to ease the slide. "I felt your cock twitching, kitten. Would you like it if I called you mine?"
That curled-up something flares again, and Atsushi feels Issay smile against him; the catch in his breath and twitch of his cock gives it away. He likes the thought, finds himself entertaining it in ways he once would never consider. "I'm yours anyway, Issei," he says quietly, as if voicing the thought might disturb the peace between them, or disturb something within himself when he was the one to propose this change in their relationship. Issay lifts his head, something unreadable glimmering in his eyes when their gazes meet, and he kisses him before he can say another word, leaving him breathless when they part. "I'm yours tonight," he says, tipping upward to meet him, and realizes that the twinge within him is excitement. Happiness. He pulls Issay's face back down to his own and kisses him again.
"Say it back," Issay whispers when that kiss is broken. There is something fragile in his voice, something desperate in his gaze, which Atsushi has never seen before. "Say it back to me, Atsushi," he says, and Atsushi feels the other man's heartbeat pick up, rushing with nerves or excitement or whatever this moment is between them. "What am I to you?"
Atsushi smiles up at him, and the sight of him is beautiful, breathtaking even. Eyes alight, cheeks flushed pink with the glow of post-orgasm, skin bathed in the moonlight glow. "You're mine," he says softly, as if voicing the thought might break this new and fragile thing between them, and it is no sooner than the thought has left his mouth before Issay is surging forward once more to kiss him. Atsushi can't help but wonder how long Issay has been waiting for a moment such as this, for a moment either of acceptance of his feelings or complete and utter rejection. He wonders, but he keeps it to himself. No need to voice it, he thinks, when this curling happiness has begun to spread outward, taking over.
His fingers curl tighter at Issay's nape, grasping at his mane of hair, and the two of them kiss just as fiercely, just as passionately as before. Issay's tongue coaxes Atsushi's lips open, and he reaches down between them to press the younger man's legs open, tucking them into place at either side of himself. Atsushi lets him, and he shifts in place beneath him to make it more comfortable for both of them, and he strains upward to keep their kiss going as Issay is forced to reach for the nightstand to pick up a condom and a packet of lube. This leaves him sitting half upright, but he find himself unwilling to end their kissing even as Issay does the necessary work of smearing lubricant onto his fingers, then reaches between Atsushi's legs to ease two of those fingers into his body.
Atsushi gasps at the intrusion, the sound followed by a grown, as Issay works those fingers further into him, not bothering with the notions of slow or gentle when neither of them have a single thing to do the next day and Issay can more than afford to book this vacation home for another night if required. He swallows these sounds as they are released for him, keeping Atsushi's lips occupied with his own as much as possible while still allowing him to break away for a groan if he needs. As the younger man's body comes back online after his intense orgasm, he begins to push himself down onto those fingers, fucking himself on them, and this encourages Issay to add a third with very little preamble.
He works those fingers apart within the younger man's body, squeezing more of that lubricant onto them when necessary, and then decides to test the give of his body by thrusting those fingers firmly in and out of him. Atsushi's head drops back and his vision goes hazy, but he manages to support himself with one hand while keeping the other arm around Issay's shoulders, and he trembles when Issay's lips wander back down to his only mildly abused throat. "Would you like me to fuck you like this, Acchan?" he asks the younger man, heat stirring in his gut at the sight of the other man, with something deeply possessive in the back of his mind whispering the word mine. "I could, kitten. And I could make it so good for you." He turns his wrist so that when he curls his fingers, he caresses the younger man's prostate, and the sound which escapes Atsushi's lips can only be described as a mewling whine. "Oh, my love, you're desperate for it, aren't you?" he whispers, watching the way that Atsushi closes his eyes and allows the pleasure to take him, and there is a part of him which recognizes that he may never have Atsushi this submissive ever again. "Use your words, Acchan," he coaxes him, easing up on his prostate for the moment, and waits for the younger man's thoughts to unscramble and return to him.
"Not like this," Atsushi whispers, feet sliding along the bed on search of a good place to find purchase, attempting to angle his hips in such a way that he can have that pressure at his prostate once again. But Issay allows him no such thing, merely finger-fucking him and continuing to work him open, and so he licks his lips and tries again. "On my knees," he manages, and Issay feels a heady rush at the thought of it. "I want you to fuck me while I'm on my knees."
"I can do that," he assures him, pushing those fingers in deeper and turning his wrist once more to curl his fingertips against the younger man's prostate as he withdraws them, and then he leaves him empty and panting, breathless, with a flush which spreads all the way down across his chest. "You're beautiful like this, Atsushi," he says reverently, pulling him in cloee for another kiss with an arm locked around his waist, and then he eases him down onto his back before pulling away.
Atsushi uses this opportunity to roll over onto his stomach, then pushes himself up onto his hands and knees, legs parted and back slightly arched downward, presenting himself for Issay's viewing pleasure. The older man groans at the sight of him, and rather than reaching for a condom he reaches to hold Atsushi's ass open, then leans forward and buries his face there, giving his entrance a swirl of his tongue before licking his way inside him. Atsushi moans out for him, shifting forward to take hold of the headboard, steadying himself, and then pushes his ass back against Issay's face.
"Fuck, Issei," he gasps, rutting back against the other man's tongue as he fucks him with it, and feels another flash of heat in his gut as the other man's answering groan vibrates against his entrance and the rest of him. "That's not what I fucking meant," he manages to complain breathlessly, then practically mewls as Issay withdraws his tongue to circle it around him and then licks his way into him once again. Never mind that one of his favorite things for Issay to do to him, aside from burying his cock in him, is to eat him out like this. Never mind that until ths vacation of theirs it had been nearly a month since he'd gotten anything from the man behind him, and that he feels a flash of ownership every time Issay touches him, or kisses him, or does anything to him.
Issay is his.
Even if they have yet to figure out the particulars.
Even if they never do.
Issay is his, and this rush of adrenaline, of arousal, of pure fucking pheromones, has got to be from the realization that neither of them have to hide behind a pretense any longer.
If only he'd gotten past himself and done this sooner, he thinks, though this thought doesn't survive long as Issay does something magnificent inside him with his tongue. His toes curl, and he moans out for him, and he pushes back against that handsome face and feels the way Issay moans for him in response. He feels it resonate within him, and the sheer pleasure of it is nearly overwhelming besides the pleasure of the act itself.
Issay reaches down between his own legs and strokes himself a few times to take the edge off, to back himself away from the edge, and the groans he releases against the younger man's ass send vibrations throughout his entire body. "You're never so on edge for me like this," Issay whispers, teeth catching on the soft swell of his ass. He licks at him again, and listens to the reaction offered to him. "Is becoming yours really all it takes, Acchan?" he continues, kissing that spot to soothe it, and then dragging his tongue over him once more. "I'll be yours for as long as you'll keep me," he promises, "if that is what it takes to make you feel like this."
"Please just fuck me, Icchan," Atsushi whispers. The emotions, the sensations, all of it, overhelm him, and he finds himself longing for Issay's grounding weight against him more than ever. A part of him is made uneasy by the prospect of it, unsure of what it all means for them, what they've just agreed to, but this part of him settles when Issay kisses his way up his spine and settles his weight against him, his chest flush to Atsushi's back. "I don't know what's come over me," he says, choosing to give voice to it, choosing to trust the man kneeling behind him, and closes his eyes when he feels those gentle fingers sweeping his hair to the side, this affection followed by soft lips trailing kisses along the back of his neck.
"We got excited," Issay whispers to him, soothing him with hands caressing his chest, placating his thundering heartbeat. "We got excited, and I've gone and made you feel far too much at once." He kisses at his nape once again, nuzzling him after, and continues to run his hands up and down his chest in alternating motions. "Let me make up for that, my love," he whispers, and one of those hands reaches between them. The head of his cock pushes against Atsushi's entrance, but he stops there, allowing the other man the chance to reject him. "I like making you feel things," he continues, "but I dont wish to overwhelm you. Would you still like me to fuck you?"
Atsushi releases a shuddering sound, that heightened feeling, whatever it should be called, fading in the face of Issay's gentle caresses, his loving attention. His body relaxes, and the head of Issay's cock slips into his body of its own accord. The pressure of him coaxes a moan from his lips, and he rocks back against him., encouraging him to give him more. "I trust you, Issei," he says breathlessly, feeling embarrassment from failing to properly settle into his beloved subspace, but keeps this to himself. "I will always trust you. Please, fuck me."
"All right," the older man murmurs, and then eases his hips forward, his length sinking slowly into Atsushi's body. The younger man groans for him, the sound coming from the bsck of his throat, and shifts his positioning to make it easier for the both of them, sighing out when Issay's pelvis sits flush against his own, his length buried all the way within him. His eyes fall closed, and he tilts his head back. Issay smiles, shifting forward with him and adjusting his own stance behind him, then reaches to cup his cheek and turn his head, guiding him into a sensuous kiss. "Fast or slow?" he questions, grinding his hips forward against Atsushi's to keep him present, content with working him open as he waits for the younger man's response.
Atsushi tilts toward him, seeking out his lips for another kiss, and Issay goes to him all too gladly, groaning into it as Atsushi's body flutters and clenches around him. "Fuck me slow like this first," he says, gasping as Issay's cock works him open, as it slides against sensitive places within him, "then fuck me harder when you can."
"So specific, kitten," Issay teases him, chuckling quietly, and then he kisses him once again, rewarding him. "I'd like to plug you afterward, to keep you full for a while." He nips at the other man's bottom lip as he says this, giving it a faint tug. "May I?"
Atsushi nods, his cock twitching with interest at the proposition. Then, because he knows full well that Issay will press him for verbal consent otherwise, he whispers, "Yes."
Issay smiles, then kisses him again. Atsushi reaches behind himself to curl an arm around Issay's neck, keeping him there, and their kiss becomes sloppy rather quickly as Issay begins to properly thrust. He draws his hips back and then works his way back in with short rolling motions, and he does this a few times before he draws back and then sinks all the way back in. Atsushi sighs out for him when he does this, his fingers going slack in Issay's hair, and Issay chuckles, reaching to take hold of his hand and place it back on the bed. "Don't strain yourself," he says softly, giving the younger man a smile, and then waits for Atsushi to face away from him and settle into a comfortable position before resuming his thrusts.
Atsushi's eyes fall closed once more, and he allows his head to drop forward as he chooses to simply bask in the pleasure being offered so freely to him. It takes a nonzero amount of effort at first not to slip back into the spiral of overthinking their new arrangement and what it could mean for either of them; even as he pushes the thoughts back he thinks of how this change will affect Hisashi, or Toshimasa, or Yuu. He wonders if they will be accepting. He wonders if Issay's firm will be as welcoming of their relationship as the other man claims. He wonders, until he decides to lean into that fluttering, blossoming happiness once more, and as he focuses in on the warmth of it, all 9f the other things melt away. He sighs out as his thoughts begin to go quiet, his legs sliding further apart on the bed to invite Issay in, and he licks his lips to wet them as the man behind him settles into a steady pace.
"There it is," he says in a breath, watching the way that Atsushi's body relaxes, muscles losing their tension. Feeling the way that he opens up for him, making each thrust into him easier than the last. Hears the way he moans, his voice low but enthusiastic, as he pushes his body back onto Issay's cock. Issay leans back down over him, covering his body with his own, and continues to work his hips against him, breathing out his sighs and groans right into Atsushi's ear. The younger man shivers at the sounds of it at first, but then he begins to moan in answer to him, falling into step with him and allowing himself to follow Issay's lead. "There you go, Acchan," Issay whispers to him, using one hand to grasp at the sheets and keep himself steasy while the other drifts down Atsushi's chest, knuckles grazing his cock. "You're doing so well for me." He offers this praise, recalling how Atsushi had melted right into it earlier in their evening together, and smiles when he hears the younger man's breath catching in response. He chuckles, then releases a groan as Atsushi's body squeezes around him, as if encouraging him to continue thrusting against a particular spot.
He settles his hips into place and thrusts in and out of the man beneath him at that same angle, and reaches to wrap his fingers around Atsushi's cock as he does. The younger man moans for him, pushing forward into to that caress, and then pushes back against him, fucking himself on Issay's cock. Heat flares in Issay's gut, and he gives Atsushi's length a few slow strokes, coaxing him back to full hardness. It's heavy in his hand even when it's mostly flaccid, but he makes quick work of that, and this coaxes moans from Atsushi's lips which sound positively divine as they fall upon Issay's ears. He keeps him there for a while, hanging in that liminal space between being fucked open and being fucked at the more intense pace which both of them seem to be craving.
When Atsushi's moans begin to pitch higher into discomfort, he eases back from playing with his cock, choosing to caress his balls instead, or to let him feel the press of his fingers sliding along his perineum near where their two bodies are connected, giving him just enough pressure to keep him at the edge but not enough stimulation to be able to leap from it. The frustrated sounds which this earns him are incredible, and he coaxes these noises from Atsushi's lips for as long as he believes the younger man can stand it.
But Atsushi begins to push himself more desperately back against him, his breaths becoming more erratic, and it is only then that Issay decides Atsushi can handle a rougher pace. He turns his head to bury his face into the crook of Atsushi's neck, moaning endlessly for him as he thrusts harder into him, the otherwise silent bedroom filled with the sound of their bodies colliding and the sounds they release for each other as each of them chase their release. Issay fucks into the younger man with as much intensity as he is able, and rather than try to match up perfectly with the pace he's set for the two of them, he tightens his grip around the younger man's cock and strokes him as quickly as he is able, twisting his wrist as much as possible and giving him as much friction as he possibly can. Atsushi's cries are positively rapturous as Issay pushes them both toward the brink of orgasm, and before either of them are able to take that leap over the edge, Issay realizes that it is going to be so much more intense than usual for both of them and opts to hold Atsushi as closely against himself as he can.
The sounds which escape the younger man pitch higher in his desperation to reach his orgasm, and Issay curls his other arm tighter around the younger man, resolved to keep him close even as the two of them chase that peak. Allowing him to feel his weight against him as much as possible as he fucks into him with abandon, at long last shedding the uptight professional facade which he has been forced to cling to since their arrival in Hokkaido and simply enjoying the way that Atsushi offers his body to him so freely, so completely, after finally handing him his heart. He fucks him harder than he means to, but the both of them are too far gone for either of them to stop.
When Atsushi comes, the pleasure of it is overwhelming, and he bites down on the pillow where he has chosen to rest his head, in an effort to stifle the loud cry which escapes him. He has little choice but to make an absolute mess of Issay's fingers as well as the sheets underneath them as he comes, spilling thick ribbons of come and sagging forward, trembling and rendered breathless, when his orgasm is done. Issay strokes him through it, coaxing the rest of that release from him, and his entire body trembles, and a strained whimper escapes him as a second, weaker orgasm rolls through him in the wake of the first.
Issay, having gone still behind him in the aftermath of his own orgasm, does his best not to crush Atsushi with his weight when the two of them drop forward, but finds that his limbs are quite useless for the moment when he attempts to lift himself away. He closes his eyes, resting there, as he works to steady his breathing and wills his heart to cease its pounding in his chest. The two of them rest there, sated and out of breath, for several long moments, until Issay's strength returns to him and he is able to move away.
Atsushi whines at the loss of his weight at his bsck, and Issay presses an apologetic kiss between his shoulder blades in answer. "It's only for a moment," Issay says quietly, and then eases himself into a kneeling position before carefully withdrawing his cock from Atsushi's body. The younger man whines again, shifting restlessly, and Issay stills his movement by pressing a hand to his lower back, easing him down. Atsushi shifts again but only seems to do so in order to ease the ache between his legs and avoid a wet spot beneath himself, and settles back into place.
Satisfied, Issay climbs out of bed and quickly disposes of the used condom, then makes his way to their suitcases where he retrieves a moderately sized plug and picks up another packet of lubricant to use for it. He climbs back onto the bed, easing Atsushi's legs apart just enough for the toy, and once he's sure there's enough lubricant on it, he begins to ease the thing into Atsushi's body.
"I know," he says gently as Atsushi whines, dealing with the discomfort of the new, consistent pressure. The younger man is rendered momentarily breathless, sensitive from his orgasm, and it takes him a moment to calm back down, even with Issay rubbing soothingly at his back. "I know, kitten," he says again, adjusting the toy only minutely to ensure it rests snugly within Atsushi's body, "but it will help with the ache." The younger man shifts, seeming to test the way which the plug moves within him, and groans quietly as it applies pressure to new places within him, stealing the breath from his lungs. "Here," Issay offers, moving into the space beside him on the bed, "let me help you. Do you have your words?"
"Sore," Atsushi says in a breath, though he allows Issay to carefully maneuver him onto his side, helping him to roll out of the wet spot. He inhales sharply as he shifts a little more to get comfortable, and he is met with Issay's concerned expression when he opens his eyes.
"I didn't hurt you, did I?" the older man questions, reaching to gingerly rub his side. He smiles, relieved, when Atsushi shakes his head. "Are you sure?"
Atsushi reaches for him, tugging at his arm to pull him closer, and tilts forward for a kiss once Issay has laid down beside him. "I'm still a little hazy," he says to him, nudging their foreheads against one another, and closes his eyes, "and I'm going to be sore in the morning." He chuckles a little as he speaks, shifting some more to test the way that the plug moves within his body and deciding that it isn't the worst one Issay could have chosen for him, and then continuee, "But please don't worry, Issei. I'm all right."
"I trust your judgment, Acchan," is Issay's murmured response, and he touches a kiss to the bridge of the younger man's nose. "Let me know if that changes. Hm?"
Atsushi nods, easing himself closer, and relaxes when he feels the warmth of Issay's body pressed against his own. He rests there, quiet, as the rest of the haze clears, and Issay waits patiently beside him, content with rubbing his side or pushing his hair back from his face. "How did the makeup do, by the way?" he asks, a small smile breaking across his features. "Is it all on the pillow now, or is it still on my face?"
"Remarkably," Issay begins with a chuckle, "most of it is still on your face." He brushes his thumb across Atsushi's bottom lip, smiling as the younger man presses a kiss to it. "I'm sure your roommate will be delighted to hear about that."
"Oh, Rookie isn't hearing a word about this," Atsuahi answers with a breath of a laugh, easing his leg between Issay's, seeking out primoximity to him. "This is just for you and me. This was special." Then, noticing the other man's lifted brow, he continues. "You've never let go with me like that before." Lightly he brushes his hand down Issay's arm, watching the goosebumps rise in the wake of his touch. "You just went for it, and trusted me to take it. That felt incredible, Issei." He's smiling as he says the words, and the two of them come together for a kiss, though this kiss doesn't last long as long as the rest.
"And all it took was for you to ask me to be with you," Issay teases him, chuckling as the other man rolls his eyes and reaches to shove at his chest. "You've never been mine before, Acchan," he says when the laughter subsides. "I've always known better than to try and claim you." His smile falters slightly as he speaks, but then it returns, and his gaze is warm as he looks into Atsushi's eyes. "Us choosing to do this together feels like we're dropping quite a bit of pretense."
"It does feel that way, doesn't it," Atsushi agrees with a thoughtful sound, lifting his hand to brush his knuckles along Issay's cheek. In return, Issay curls an arm around his waist, brushing his fingertips up and down Atsushi's spine. He releases a quiet sound in response to the touch, comforted by it even as his skin prickles in the wake of it. "I really want to get this right, Issei," he says after a few moments of quiet pass between them. "Are you too tired from the day to talk about the particulars?"
"Let's get your makeup removed first," Issay says with a smile, giving him a brief kiss. "I want to make sure you're taken care of before we have a conversation like that."
Atsushi nods, offering a smile in response. "All right. Though I don't think I could get up right now, even if I wanted to." He chuckles a little, feigning a small, bashful smile. Issay sees right through it, as he always does, but it still does something to him which he cannot explain.
"No need, Acchsn," he says, kissing that small smile and then shifting bsck from his embrace. "I'll go get that infernal makeup bag of yours, and I'll be right back." With that, he rises from the bed, and Atsushi watches him cross the room, admiring the sight of him in the moon glow. He disappears into the bathroom just long enough to retrieve Atsushi's makeup bag and a couple of towels, and he sets them within reach on the nightstand before moving to rejoin the younger man on the bed. "Close your eyes for me, Acchan," he says to him, fishing out the makeup removal wipes Atsushi brought with him, carefully beginning his work.
"You probably didn't think that this is the kind of aftercare you would be offering when you became a dominant, did you?"
Issay chuckles, shaking his head despite the other man being unable to see him. "No, I didn't," is his answer, "but I don't mind it, you know. It's my job to take care of you," he pauses there, gently guiding Atsushi in turning his head to get a better look at him, "and if this is what you need of me, then I'm happy to do this for you."
Atsushi feels that same fluttering within him, and he follows the guidance of Issay's hand. "You always take care of me, Issei," he says, keeping his eyes closed until the other man has finished wiping his eyelids, and then opens them to look up at him, watching him as he focuses on his task. "I want to make sure you feel taken care of, too."
"You don't have to take care of me, Acchan," Issay says gently, clearing away the foundation and concealer on Atsushi's cheek.
"Mmm, except we're in a proper relationship now," Atsushi says after a moment or three. "I don't think it's fair to you if I'm the one receiving all the care and I'm not giving you anything in return."
"I would hardly call what you've given me 'nothing,' Atsushi," the other man counters him, beginning to clear away the makeup near his jawline, exposing the faded teeth marks and hickeys from the night before. "You've given me quite a lot over the last couple of years."
"You know that isn't what I mean, Issei," Atsushi says gently, his gaze on the other man's features as he considers his words. "If you could ask anything of me in this new relationship of ours, what would you ask for?"
Issay appears to think that one over for a moment, focusing his attention on continuing to clean the makeup from Atsushi's skin. "We were meant to wait to have this conversation," he says thoughtfully, "until after I'd done this for you." He smiles a little as he speaks, earning a small smile from Atsushi in return, and then continues, "but since you're curious, if I could ask anything of you, it would be for me to be your only partner." He watches Atsushi's smile falters, the younger man glancing away. "I'm not asking that of you, by the way. I understand how much the others in your life mean to you."
"They may choose not to keep seeing me, anyway, once I tell them."
Issay pauses, meeting his gaze. He hadn't considered that. "And you're willing to chance that?" he asks, that catefully guarded vulnerability returning to his expression. "Acchan. You needn't risk-"
"Oh, Issei," Atsushi says gently, moving to sit upright as carefully as possible, ignoring the way that the toy within him shifts around inside him, and reaches to take Issay's face in his hands. "If only you knew how muxh you mean to me." He leans in close, pressing their lips together, and this time their kiss lingers, and Atsushi smiles into it when he feels Issay release a soft exhale against his mouth. "I even let you put a toy inside me tonight," he tacks on once their kiss is broken, earning a breath of a chuckle from the other man, "and if that isn't love, then I don't know what is."
"That certainly is a unique way to show your love for me," Issay says with another light chuckle, nudging his forehead to Atsushi's, brushing their noses against one another. "Let me show mine by getting the rest of your makeup off your face, hm? We can talk more about this after that."
"If you insist," Atsushi answers him with a smile, and then he draws back from their embrace. Once more, Issay picks up the makeup removal wipes, and Atsushi keeps still so that the other man can continue his work. He keeps his gaze on him, watching the way that he focuses on the task, and finds himself smiling as Issay's thumb skims his jaw to trace the line of bite marks left behind. He keeps quiet this time, however; neither of them aay a word until his skin is free and clear of the last bit of foundation, leaving his face bare.
Then, once the two of them have shifted into a more comfortable position, with Issay resting against the pillows and Atsushi curled up beside him, the older man is the first to break the silence. "Why now?" he asks, his fingers gently skimming up and down Atsushi's side. There is no accusation in his tone, only curiosity, and he turns his head to kiss Atsushi's hairline. "Earlier, you said that if you were going to do this with anyone, it would be with me." Atsushi hums in acknowledgment, though he doesn't say anything quite yet. Idly, Issay lifts a hand to brush the younger man's hair back from his face. "I'm curious, kitten. What was it that made you so sure about choosing this with me?"
"Is it cliche to say that it's the way you make me feel when we're together?" He tips his head back, looking up at the man beside him, taking in the sight of that carefully guarded expression on his features, as if he is braced to be let down in some way. "I feel safe when I'm with you," he says when Issay remains quiet, neither of them entirely sure of how to proceed with such a conversation. "I feel safe, and I feel protected, and cared for." He smooths his palm over Issay's bare chest, resting it over his heart. "You let me come to you whenever I need to, even if it's just to lie on the couch with you and have you play with my hair so that my thoughts can go quiet. I..." He pauses there, fingers curling slightly over Issay's ribcage. "I trust you so much, and somewhere along the way, that trust grew into love. I don't think I know exactly when that change happened."
"And so pursuing a relationship seemed like the next reasonable step, yes?" Issay questions, lifting a brow slightly. Atsushi nods in response. "Even though it was very possible that I would ask you to walk away from your other connections before I would agree to be with you." He considers this for a moment, catching Atsushi's hand within his own, idly playing with his fingers. "I am not going to ask that of you tonight, by the way," he continues, sensing the way Atsushi goes quiet and looks down at their hands rather than holding his gaze. He brings their hands to his lips and kisses Atsushi's knuckles. "I trust you, Acchan, and I want to let you have a chance to have the conversations that you need to."
"But you're nervous about this," Atsushi observes. "Introducing me as your partner to people you don't see often is one thing. Right? Making this work at home will be another." He glances back up at the man beside him, shifting a little next to him so that he can rest against him more comfortably. "I'm nervous, too," he admits softly. "It's been a long time since I've tried to be in a relationship, Issei. I'm nervous that I'm going to do something wrong and then I'll lose you." He pulls himself forward on the bed, leaning in close enough to the other man that he can press their lips together, and he releases a breath of a sigh against Issay's lips when they break apart. "I want to give you the feeling of security you give me," he says softly. "I don't want this to feel like the same arrangement with a different title."
"I'm relieved to hear you say that, Acchan," Issay murmurs, nudging their noses against one another, "because I don't want that either." He closes his eyes, curling his arm around Atsushi's waist as the other man settles half atop him. Atsushi grunts softly as the plug shifts inside him, but he manages to settle comfortably into place, Issay's arm around him keeping him close. "I only want to make sure you aren't making a decision here that you could come to regret."
"I wish I'd waited for a more romantic backdrop," Atsushi muses, chuckling a little, "but I don't regret this, Issei. How could I?" This time it is Atsushi who kisses the edges of Issay's mouth, then he turns his head to kiss him properly. Issay returns that kiss, his palm skimming down Atsushi's back, and Atsushi continues that kiss until the other man seems to relax. "I love you, Issei," he whispers. It feels strange to be offering comfort to the man who is the one to look after him, to see that flash of doubt in his eyes and be unsure of how to quell it, but then again their new arrangemt feels foreign to him. It feels strange to gaze into Issei's eyes and have the first word in his thoughts be the word mine. He finds himself at a loss as to what he should say or do after their kiss is broken, and feels the stirring of guilt and doubt within the pit of his own stomach.
Should he not have done this after all? Should he have waited? Should he have allowed Issay to be the one to make the ask?
These questions begin to swirl in his thoughts, and he begins to wonder if it was a leap too far, and perhaps too soon. There is a part of him which has been long been locked away, one which drove him to choose his current path to begin with, of paid-for sex and love for money and gifts and perhaps a few genuine collections along the way. He looks at Issay and thinks back on their encounter in Ikekuburo, and he thinks of Hisashi and the music shop, and of Toshimasa and Yuu and their damn near worship of him.
"Don't wander too far from me, kitten," Issay says softly, fondly, and Atsushi feels that nickname roll through him in a shiver of recognition. "What are you thinking about that has you drifting so far away?"
"It's so hard to know what is real," Atsushi whispers, his gaze flickering upward to meet Issay's. "In what I do, it is....So hard to tell what's real and what isn't. I don't just sell my body, I sell a fantasy, too. A....Really fucking good fantasy, if I might say so myself." He chuckles a little, though the sound has very little humor in it. "But this, Issei...." His fingertips trace a circle over Issay's heart, and there is something pleading in his gaze which Issay has never seen before. "This is real. With you, it has always been real."
"You say that as though we were always meant to fall for each other,."
Atsushi hums in response. "Maybe we were."
Issay's smile returns to his features, and despite his reservations, despite his concerns about how Atsushi's other partners might choose to move forward, he feels that same fluttering of hope within his chest that he'd felt before. His eyes shine with it, and then he feels his chest ache with it, and suddenly their proximity is not even close to enough. "Come here, Atsushi," he whispers, and tilts his head upward as Atsushi leans down to meet him, their lips connecting in a kiss which begins as something gentle and loving but deepens into something much more than that. Atsushi's lips part for him as his tongue slides forward, and then the younger man moves to straddle him, grunting quietly into their kiss as the movement causes that toy to shift within him once again.
One hand lingers on Issay's chest, fingertips resting atop the older man's heartbeat, and the other slides toward the nape of his neck, keeping him in place for that passionate kiss. So many of the words left unsaid between them are exchanged in gentle caresses, in idle sighs and desperate, quiet sounds released against one another's lips. Atsushi is too sore to offer the man beneath him his body, and so he instead offers him his hunger, his desire, and all the things which feel so much more familiar to both of them.
The new things, the unfamiliar things, will come later. In the morning, they will give voice to their fears, to their concerns, to their hidden truths. They will address them all, one by one, and they will do this as gently as they are able, with as much care for one another's limits and boundaries as they possibly can. They will have a conversation which to the both of them feels months overdue, and they will be happy and love-stricken when they return to Issay's home with something new and delicate between them which will require so much more from both of them in order for it to grow.
But here, kissed by the moonlight snd wrapped up in the tangled sheets of a vacation rental in Hokkaido, Atsushi's hips drag against Issay's in such a way that it elicits a gasp from the man beneath him and lights a spark between the two of them. He's too sore to offer Issay his body and so he offers his hand instead, and he kisses him and fondles him until he's on the brink of orgasm, exhausted and sensitive but just as desperate for it as Atsushi is to feel him come for him one last time before they sleep and face the daylight. He strokes him through that orgasm until Issay is breathless and spent beneath him, and they kiss for a while longer, simply indulging in one another, until they can kiss no more.
Once more, Atsushi takes his place at Issay's side, curling up close to him, and this time he doesn't mind the movement of the plug inside him; where he would usually choose to idly scratch at the man beside him until Issay relents and gives him permission to remove it from his body, he chooses to keep his claws sheathed as he shuts his eyes and listens to the way Issay's breathing slows, his chest steadily rising and falling as he succumbs to sleep, and decides he can tolerate the discomfort of the thing, just this once.
Because if that isn't love, he thinks, kissing Issay's shoulder before adjusting so that he may rest his head upon it, what is?