Chapter Text
I hope the encore lasts forever, now there’s time for us to spend
- Rex Orange County
——
After a bit of a delay due to the god awful Champions League format, Jude was finally touching down in Liverpool.
It was mid, going into late March, so the weather was a little cooler than Spain, but not as bad as he remembered it to be.
Staring at the buildings pass by with the smallest of smiles, Jude still had his brother’s concerns in the back of his mind, the possibility of all this being for nothing.
The possibility that this really was too far beyond repair, that maybe he’d realise too late, that it already was.
But really, that’s how it was going to stay, at the back of his mind.
Because Jude was ready, he was just excited to Trent again.
As excited as he was to though, he wasn’t expecting sunshine and rainbows, not with the Reds recent results. The injury definitely wouldn’t be helping his case either, Trent was as stubborn as they come, so he was probably trying to speed up his recovery in some stupid unconventional way.
He’d already kept himself bed ridden for a week after the injury, even going as far as staying home for his team’s cup final.
With all that being said, the moment his ride pulls into the drive way Jude is still desperate to see him, more than ready to keep him company.
He thanks his ride one last time before rushing to the door with a little skip in his step, lightly knocking with one hand and his travel bag clutched in the other, pleasantly surprised at how fast it opens from the other side.
Finally after what felt like forever (barely even a month btw), Jude had Trent in front of him again.
His tired expression quickly turns into one of joy, of relief, even his eye bags seemed to brighten— almost disappearing as a smile came instead, shining like the sun and warming Jude in seconds.
“The boy,”
He steps aside so he can make his way in, the door way open and welcoming as he snapped himself out of his trance.
Jude knew where everything was, it wasn’t his first time being here, but he drops his bag just shy of the door way before wrapping his arms around Trent the moment he closed the door behind them.
“How’re ya feeling?”
Trent hums going slack in his hold.
“Better now, but still hurts.”
“Still no training, yeah?”
“They wouldn’t let me.”
That makes Jude scoff, leaning back to see Trents face.
“I wonder why.”
Pushing off of him, Trent starts limping into the house while flipping Jude off, it’s kind of depressing really.
Jude starts to feel even worse than he already did for him, for this being his last season for the Reds, this is definitely not the ending he’d wanted.
But that whole thing was still a sensitive subject since his move had been announced by Fabrizio, so he was going to keep that to himself.
“C’mon, Jude.”
The sound of Trents voice brings his eyes back to his face, the lopsided smile telling Jude he could sense his pity.
“It’s late, I’m tired.”
Jude nods, backpedaling for his bag before catching up to Trent.
It’s pretty smooth from there, Trent was already ready for bed long before he had arrived, watching on as Jude got ready himself. There’s light conversation, banter, and everything in between— it felt nice, it was nice, it was something the both of them hadn’t really had before.
The presence of someone with you, just being there while you both existed, the presence of someone you love.
They were both settled in now, and it was clear the both of them were tired. All the lights were off, it was just them and the dark, rambling on about nothing and everything all the same.
“It’s not that simple, T.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know— I was in the midfield, then I was a centre forward, then I was swapped again and—“
“But you can still take them on, you haven’t done that for a while.”
Jude stares at him, realising he was right.
They had gotten into a deep breakdown of his position at Madrid, it had changed about three times at least, which was difficult for him.
He went off last campaign, young player of the season and all that, so it was a shock to the whole team to be honest.
But alas, buying Mbappe meant something was going to happen.
“I guess I haven’t.”
“You should.”
“Maybe I can’t anymore.”
Trent laughs, only stopping to yawn before speaking up again.
“You can.”
He takes Judes hand after saying it, sighing a little at its warmth, his hands were cold.
“What makes you say that?”
“Because you’re you.”
Jude laughs back, shifting a bit to get his arm out of an awkward angle.
“What?”
“You’re you, you’re Jude Bellingham.”
He brings his hand to his lips, eyes half closed with sleep as he kissed his fingertips before engulfing it back into his own.
“You can do anything.”
Oh.
“Can we sleep now? M’so tired.”
Jude blinks down at him, his eyes were already shut, the moonlight showing he was already half way there.
He was going to look forward to a lot more of this next season.
“Go to sleep, then.”
Trent hums, already asleep.
“Goodnight to you too, T.”
——
“Is it always warm in Madrid?”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
Jude adds a sugar to his coffee then slides Trent his tea, leaning on the island across from where he was seated.
“Better than here, I’ll tell you that much.”
“You don’t fancy the weather here in Liverpool?”
“Think my career would’ve looked a little different if I did.”
Trent rolls his eyes, laughing a bit before his face contorted a little bit as he took in Jude.
He wasn’t mad at the sudden change in atmosphere, It didn’t need to be said, he knew exactly what was going through his head -
It could’ve been here.
“Um— how about your area? Is it nice?”
“Everywhere is nice, T, I’ve already told you everything.”
“Right, of course.”
Jude lets the silence that follows sit, watching Trent as he played with the string of his tea bag, clearly a lot more on his mind than the weather.
“Are you scared?”
He looks up at him, down, then up again.
“Who wouldn’t be?”
“It’ll be okay, you can always come back here, it’s not like you’re leaving forever. It’s like an hour flight, Marcell and Tyler will always—“
“That’s not what I’m scared of.”
Jude raises a brow at him, a cue for him to continue.
“I won’t get home sick or whatever, I’m not worried about that, I’ll have this— you.”
All his answer does is confuse him even more, but he still tries his best to read between the lines.
“Not following, mate.”
Not that he does well.
“Home, being with you feels like home.”
Ah.
Of course.
Trent shrugs, motioning at the walls around them.
“And you’ll be much closer than this here.”
Jude feels his heart rate pick up ten fold, a warmth spreading through his chest he’d never experienced before, a feeling he now wanted for the rest of his life.
This was it, the feeling he had been fighting for.
Something so intimate and equally as intense said so casually, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“What I’m scared of is everything else, playing, the fans— I’ve never been scared before, not of doing what I love.”
He pulls his teabag out, dropping it onto the plate next to his mug.
“Like, am I staying in right back? Am I gonna be in the midfield? What if I mess up? My defending is better, but it’s still not perfect, y’know?”
He brings it up to his lips, quickly adding on before taking a sip.
“It’s a new place, new club and all that, new system. M’just so used to this one, so.”
Jude nods, taking a sip of his coffee.
Trent was right, skipping over the part where he made him fall in love all over again, there were a lot of things different from what he was used to— and that’s taking Liverpool and England.
It was something Jude was scared of too, being apart of something so different, it was scary. To add on the pressure of the history of the clubs was something he didn’t have though, but he’d still try his best to be the shoulder Trent can lean on.
He’s the one who talked his ear off about the club after all.
Before the whole LA thing, that is.
“It’ll be okay, I’ll show you everything.”
He puts his coffee down with force, its contents spilling a little bit.
How many shots did he put in it again?
“On and off the pitch. I’ll show you everything, we’ll get through it together.”
“But—“
“All of it, it’ll be fine, I’ve wanted to win with you for years.”
Jude reaches across the counters surface to take Trents hand, smiling at the sweet burgundy that appears on his cheeks.
“On and off the pitch.”
Trent smiles back reciprocating his hold and threading their fingers together.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Jude laughs, taking in the site in front of him.
“You can’t run away from me this time.”
“Fuck off,”
Trent laughs back, shaking his head before giving his full attention back to Jude.
“It worked out in the end, didn’t it?”
He doesn’t stop himself from laughing again, it worked out in the hardest way possible, in a way most wouldn’t let happen.
It worked because they made it work, it worked because Jude waited, he waited when he shouldn’t have.
It worked because he wanted it to, he needed it to, it worked because he chose to play this stupid game.
It worked because Jude had never been one to lose, he hated it.
“Yeah, it did.”
Especially when there was the smallest chance he could win.
——
They stay at home for the rest of the day, Trent still too concerned about speeding up his recovery process.
Jude had made himself comfortable on the couch as he watched Trent, who was spread out on the floor doing his rehab.
They had something random rolling on the TV, the volume low so they could listen to the music coming from the speaker. It was chill, calming, and something Jude could get used to.
As Trent moved to glute bridges, the thought plants a seed, growing rapidly and grounding its roots.
Knowing he was coming to Madrid (like, actually coming this time) meant they did get to have this, that it was something to get used to, it meant Jude never had to worry about someone else ever again.
The thing is though, he never should have had to worry about that in the first place.
He’d never be able to fully understand what Trent did, he didn’t think Trent himself did either, none of it made sense.
But if Trent didn’t get how would he?
What did it even matter?
Maybe he did understand, and if that were the case Jude wished he could explain it, make it so he could understand all his faults— come to terms with them.
Maybe if they weren’t as young, not as naive, not as confused or overwhelmed or scared.
But till then that’s all it’ll be, a misunderstanding, a maybe.
Something Jude was more than happy to live with if it meant keeping Trent next to him.
“Jude? Are you okay?”
Jude blinks himself out of his trance, realising he’s already looking at Trent when he does.
“Uh, yeah.”
“Don’t look like it.”
He frowns with his words, un-hooking his exercise band from his foot.
“If there’s anyth—“
“Jobe thinks I’m crazy, you know?”
Trents face scrunches up, his brows furrowed in confusion.
“What?”
“For staying with you, giving you a chance, he thinks I’m crazy.”
“Where’s this coming from?”
“I was thinking about it.”
“Oh.”
He lowers his gaze, breathing in heavily before looking back to Jude.
“Jude, if what I did—“
“I wish I got it, why you did it, but I just—“
Jude does the same, only he kept his eyes on Trent the whole time.
“I just don’t care anymore, not when I finally have you.”
“Jude—“
“No way I could let you go, not when you know too much.”
The light hearted comment gets a laugh out of Trent, a sad smile on his face as he responded with a half assed come back.
“Get lost.”
“Nah, you’ve got me got a long time now.”
Judes reply turns the smile into something more genuine, something a little more real before fading away with the silence.
His exercise band was still in his hands, poking and pulling on it as he kept looking around the room.
All Jude could do was watch, keeping his eyes on him as waited for him to steer the conversation.
He knew what he wanted, he’s happy with what he had, with what they have— but he just needed something from Trent, something to give him a little bit of closure, not that he could ever hold anything against him.
Before the silence can get too much, he gets just that with Trents next words.
“We’ll talk about it one day. This. Everything.”
And that was fine, that was okay,
That was all he needed to hear.
Because that didn’t mean they wouldn’t talk about it, it just meant they’d take their time.
It was time they now had, next season they’d have to have each other long term, they’d have each other for as long as the other would let them. They had each other to grow, as players and as people, they had each other to learn.
So even if Jude had to worry about someone else before, it felt like it never happened, because now he knew— he believed it because it was right in front of him.
They just had each other, they finally, finally had each other.
And maybe one day they’d be old enough to understand why everything happened the way it did.
“I think what I’ve told you is this best way I can put it still, when I flew to Spain, I just—“
“I get it, it’s fine, we’re fine.”
“You keep saying that, but I—“
“I was stupid too, I waited too long to say something.”
Jude laughs from his spot on the couch, bruising his arms over his chest as he looked at anything but Trent.
“You blinded me in more ways than one.”
“I... I guess so.”
All Jude does is nod, turning back but keeping his gaze on Trents band instead of the man himself.
This is closest they’ll get to it till then he thinks, a conversation about everything, the both of them were still too new to this— but they weren’t in a rush anymore.
They had time.
“I never thought you’d remembered. Ever.”
Trent speaks up again, tapping his lips to make it clear what he was talking about.
“That’s why I brought it up in LA, you in the bathroom.”
Jude just shrugs, smiling at him.
“I remembered every time, still do.”
“You do not remember all of th—“
“Six.”
“Really?”
“Including the time we fucked, seven.”
“Jesus.”
He shrugs again, his smile growing wider.
“We should do that again by the way, when you’re not broken.”
Not that Trent does the same.
“Haha.”
Then he does.
“But yeah I agree.”
Jude chuckles at that, prompting Trent to do the same until his smile fades into something sad again, leaning back on his hands as he kicked his legs back out.
“I really am sorry, Jude.”
Now shaking his dead, Jude gestures for Trent to come over, pulling him closer when he does just that and stops in front of him.
“I already said it’s okay, we’ll figure it out together, T.”
He pulls him in by his hips before taking of Trents hands in his own, kissing his knuckles then looking up to him with the most reassuring smile he could manage.
“I was dumb, you were dumb, we will be forever.”
Jude huffs out, shaking his head slightly in disbelief as he admired the man in front of him, wanting nothing but him like this in his arms at all times.
He wanted to take him home to Spain tomorrow, to shower him with everything he thought he could never have and everything he already does, to let him know he could do what he did a thousand times as long as it meant he’d get him like this every time.
Jobe could be right 100%, but Trent could make him wait all over again and he’d still do it all over again.
Because even if Jude still wasn’t bulletproof, even if he never would be, he’d still definitely take a bullet or two.
Especially if it was for Trent.
“Now we can be dumb together this time, I guess, both of us were wrong anyway.”
Trent forces a laugh, probably still just as confused as Jude was, but also just as committed.
He takes his hand out of Judes hold, using it to cup his face instead, holding him like a prized possession.
“Yeah.”
Then he leans down, pressing a soft kiss to Judes lips who graciously returns it, his eyes fluttering shut and his shoulders less heavy.
It’s nothing like LA, nothing like the first time, and nothing like in Finland.
It felt secure, it felt reassuring, it felt like everything it was supposed to from the start.
It felt like love. It felt like forever.
Because this time around he knew both of them were staying right where they wanted to be.
When Trent pulls away, his eyes blinking open and a deep red dusted on his cheeks, he’s smiling again— another real, genuine smile as he whispered against Judes lips.
“Maybe it’s the both of us.”
Jude just smiles back, moving to kiss him again.
Then again, and again, and again, any and every where he can reach.
“Maybe it is.”