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They will not use my tears for their entertainment

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The moment Haymitch saw Effie as he walked back in the room lent by Coin at old President Snow’s palace, he knew he was a dead man. And it was quite something to say for him as he had survived one Hunger Games, years of mentorship and a goddamn Rebellion.

“Did you truly vote in favor of new Games?”

Haymitch’s body stilled. So that would explain why she was royally pissed at him. But how did she know already? He had left the meeting with Coin and the other Victors a few hours earlier. He cleared his throat, hoping she wouldn’t catch his uneasiness to discuss this specific matter with her.

“Who told you?”

“Johanna, but..”

He threw his hands in the air, pissed at the culprit. “Of course it was Jo. I’m going to kill her.”

Effie brought her hands on her hips. She was back in her old Capitol’s clothes and Haymitch didn’t know whether he liked it or not. He had grown fond of the Thirteen’s uniform on her. Sure, the Capitol style had been toned down, but the awful wig was still there.

“Well, if two Games and a rebellion didn’t kill her, I doubt you’ll be able to, Haymitch. Besides, I fail to see how it changes the fact that you actually did vote for new Games.”

Haymitch sighed. That conversation was going to be unpleasant as fuck. “First of all, it was Coin’s idea,” he explained as his feet reached her.

“Why am I not even remotely surprised?” Effie snorted, but didn’t stand back when he faced her which meant hope was permitted.

The make up was softer too, he realized. She looked almost humane. If she wasn’t so angry at him, he could have kissed her right there, right now.

“Why the clown outfit sweetheart? I thought you were at least done with the ugly wigs.”

“And I thought you and your rebel friends were done with the Games. Do not change the subject,” she warned him.

He gulped down. “Touché,” he managed to say with a faint smile. She didn’t smile back.

“Who voted no?”

“Peeta, Annie and Beetee.”

“Who voted yes?”

“Johanna…”

“I already know that. Johanna, in her great kindness, didn’t forget to inform me of her vote” Effie replied dryly.

“Enabora as well.”

He saw Effie purse her lips, but it wasn’t out of anger. More out of disappointment. Haymitch tended to forget she knew the other Victors as well. She might even call some of them friends. Hearing that her friends voted against people like her surely might hurt her.

He tried to reach for her hand, but this time she recoiled from him.

“I guess I deserve it,” he mumbled.

Effie looked up, staring at him with the saddest expression on her face. “Interesting…You told me you wouldn’t let them use your tears for their entertainment but I guess Capitol children's tears are okay.”

“You don’t understand…”

Effie shook her head. “Oh so you’re telling me I’m just not clever enough to understand ? Enlighten me then, Haymitch.”

The way she said his name didn’t sound right to his ears. He much preferred the teasing tone she put into it when they would bicker. Or the sensual way she would say his name when they were having sex.

He crossed his arms against his chest. “Like I told the rest of the Victors earlier, I’m with the Mockingjay.”

“So, what? You’re betting on an unstable teenage girl whose life had been ripped apart? Wow, and I was called the naive one.” she snapped.

Haymitch shook his head. “She has a plan. I trust her. And you will have to trust me too.”

He was met with a hard and cold silence. He cleared his throat and quickly added,“The moment President Snow is dead, we’ll all be able to leave that damn place.”

“I’m not coming to Twelve,” she retorted right away. “I’m staying here.” Another silence stretched between them. “For Peeta,” she clarified.

“Of course,” Haymitch muttered, not sure to reply to that obvious lie.

Peeta was such a lame excuse, although the boy needed to have someone while he was recovering. Yet Haymitch was no fool. He knew the hard truth. Effie was Capitol, first and foremost. She was not going to come to Twelve. Like ever. And the thought depressed him. He couldn’t imagine a life without her. The Games, atrocious as they were, gave them a reason to spend time together. The moment Peeta would come back to Twelve, there was little reason for Haymitch and her to call each other.

“You can still visit though, right?” he dared asking her, his eyes making sure not to stare into her eyes.

“Of course. The children…”

He cut her off angrily. “Only the children?”

A soft smile lingered on her lips. “That depends.” She leaned forward and he seized the opportunity to grab her by the waist. “Do tell me, Haymitch. What are we?”

Haymitch rolled his eyes. “Come on, sweetheart.”

She pressed a hand against his chest, her eyes never leaving his. “I love you, Haymitch. It’s been years. and it’s not like I hid it very well. I know for you that our relationship was more like a way to get some steam off with the Games but…”

“It was not.”

Effie blinked.

“Maybe at first,” he admitted. “But it’s been a while since I didn't touch another woman.”

She pursed her lips and Haymitch just knew he had said the wrong thing. Again.

“Always the romantic, Haymitch.”

He cut her off with a searing kiss, one hand still on her waist. “Romantic enough for you sweetheart? Or should I throw you on that comfortable bed?”

Her hands wrapped around his neck and for the first time since he’d walked into his room, she was smiling. “You’re a caveman.”

He grinned at her. “Part of my charm, I guess…You know I’m not good with feelings and stuff. But just you know, you’re important to me.”

He wanted to kiss her again, but she talked first.

“I really hope for you Katniss has a great plan.”

Haymitch shrugged. “The girl is the freaking Mockingjay. She knows what she is doing.” He gazed at Effie’s lips. “You’re sure you’re not coming to Twelve?”

She smiled. “We’ll discuss my housing arrangement after Peeta’s recovery. The children do come first, don’t they?”