Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Peter's POV

---Thrusday ---

No no no no– Ahg DAMN IT!

Peter reaches the bottom of the subway stairs to see his train flying by.

This is suboptimal. 

Great, now he'll be late, and Jameson will chew him out. Peter groans and walks towards a pillar to lean on. No way he's leaving now, he already paid the stupid 3$, he's going to ride this train no matter what. Jameson will just have to suck it up, it's not like being late will kill him, might even be good for him. Develop patience --

Suddenly, a sharp tingle stabs the back of Peter's neck. He snaps his head up and looks for anything that might be dangerous and...

Nothing?

Peter rubs the back of his neck. It's gone now, whatever it was. Maybe it was never even there? But it can't be his tingling sense of doom was never wrong.

Peter's face scrunches in thought.

I guess there's a first for everything...

Deciding it's too early to be this hung up on nothing, so he ignores it, pretending that it never even happened in the first place. He shakes his head and looks back down at his phone. trying to wash away the worry slowly building up in his chest.

It has to be something it's never not nothing. Right? God, why isn't there like a spider-Yoda to--

The feeling from earlier slowly creeps up on him, starting from his hips, traveling up his spine, and buzzing at the back of his neck. Peter doesn't snap his head up this time; he waits for something, well, anything.

maybe it's like a see no evil type thing?

That doesn't make any sense, but it doesn't stop him from listening to his environment. Nothing happens; just regular NYC sounds: people talking, walking, taking photos--

*Click*

Hearing the camera click, makes his nape tenses up.

*Click*

Oh?

He lifts his head to find the source of the sound and sees a stranger taking selfies. No one else is taking photos. Peter's face twists, well, it's the guy his tingle was trying to tell him about. But him?

He looks so non-evil, though. Incredibly normal and somewhat... odd?

Peter doesn't stop looking at the stranger; he's kind of weird about it. After a bit, the stranger stops taking selfies, notices Peter looking at him, and gives him a wink.

???

Peter gives the stranger a shy smile before returning to his phone. He can feel his cheeks burning. He didn't mean to stare at the guy for so long; he's just confused about why a guy, who's not doing anything, is tripping his senses.

Maybe that says more about my love life than anything. Even my tingle of doom is playing matchmaker.

He puts his head in his hands, trying to ignore all that. He waits a couple more minutes for his train to come, trying to push away all the thoughts of what just happened. He lines up to get on his train, but he notices that the guy from earlier is getting on the same car as him.

It's all in my head. People ride the same train all the time. This is nothing.

Peter pinches his nose bridge and sits down, noticing that he chose the seat right across from the guy from earlier. Trying to avoid any more social interaction, he plays on his phone, and the guy from earlier does the same thing. The train ride goes smoothly; there is no tingle or conversation, just good old pretending to play on your phone. Peter gets up to leave the car, looking at the stranger one last time before leaving, he gives him another wink as he leaves.

God, I'm losing it

"Damn it, Parker! Where the hell have you been?!" Jameson yells at Peter as he enters The Daily Bugle. "You're 20 minutes late!!"

First of all, he's not 20 minutes late, he's 18 minutes late. But he has a weird feeling that Jameson isn't in the mood for semantics. "There was a holdup at the station." Before Jameson can demand the photos of himself Spider-Man, he pulls them out of his backpack and hands them to Jameson.

He wastes no time and sifts through the photos immediately. While looking through them, he hums in satisfaction. "Fine, but you're not off the hook for being late! Now go write something to sell these damn things!" he throws the photos back to Peter and slams the door of his office/

Holy shit

Peter stands there stunned. Jameson loved the photos, sure, in his own Jameson way. But the thought was still there. Maybe his heart will grow three times its size soon. Who knows? Peter walks over to his desk, still high off the 'praise' that Jameson gave him.

When Peter sits down and opens his computer, Betty, Jameson's secretary, hands him an article.

"Wow, those pictures must have been top tier to calm Jameson down from that. Nice job, Parker."

Peter leans back, throws his hands behind his back, and swivels his chair to look at Betty." Yeah, contrary to popular belief, I do try."

Betty scoffs a laugh and points her pen at the article she gave him, "Ok, well, try to write something following that bad boy." Peter looks over at the article and sees "SPIDER-MAN: A TRUE HERO OF NYC" headlining the article.

Peter's face twists in confusion, "Wait a second, I have to write something with this!?" Betty shrugs. "You haven't even read it, you can't look at the headline and just know what it's about."

Peter nods in agreement against his will. " Okay, good point. Have you read it?" Betty nods, and Peter asks, "Could I make anything good from this?" Betty snorts and responds. "HA, no. That article is gushing all over your boy, like a middle school girl. But I'm not the boss, am I?"

Peter tries to fight the blush creeping up his neck. "No, but you're boss adjacent, it was worth a shot." Betty hums in satisfaction. "Well, Parker, I can't tell you what to do, but if I were you, I'd just write the opposite of anything that article says."

Peter leans back in his chair and groans. It's good advice, but now he actually has to sit down and do it. Whatever, I usually make it work out in the end. Call it Parker luck." Betty gives him a flat face. "Wow, how amazing, now do it before Jameson gets pissy again." Betty returns to her desk, leaving Peter alone to work on his article.

After a few moments of playing solitaire, he hears Betty call for him. "Peter, can you come here for a second?" Peter's brow furrows in confusion.

She never calls for me unless I'm in trouble, and I'm pretty sure I smoothed things over with Jameson--

What the fuck?

Peter's train of thought is cut off after he sees the man from the subway earlier standing at Betty's desk, chit-chatting. Peter's face turns red, remembering what happened earlier. He rubs his cheeks, trying to cool himself down before arriving at Betty's desk.

"What's up?" Betty turns her chair to look at Peter and tells him what's happening. "Oh, Peter! Meet Wade. He's the new delivery driver assigned here. Can you please help him bring up the reams of paper? I have to finish this call." Peter nods and faces Wade, who begins talking. "Hey, didn't think we'd meet each other again so soon? What a coinkydink!" Betty raises her eyebrows, not looking at them.

Crap she's listening!

Peter begins heading towards the stairs and responds. "Yeah, small world or whatever. Anyway! Where are we going?"

Chapter Text

Wade's POV

(yellow)&[white]

--Wednesday--

Wade steps out of the cramped taxi car and stretches out, before shaking himself like a dog.

"Thanks again for the ride, Dopinder." Wade fakes patting himself down, pretending to look for his wallet. "Fuckin' eh, sorry, Dopinder. It looks like I forgot my wallet again. Is a crips 5 alright?" he asks the question, as he slowly lifting his hand.

[Really had to bring out the Canadian accent to guilt-trip this middle-class American citizen? That's just wrong.]

Oh, save it, he wouldn't help if he didn't want to.

(yeahh, cause who wouldn't help a maniac covered in blood, and has a full arsenal in his duffle bag?)

"Thanks, Mr.Pool, I'll see you later!" Dopinder enthusiastically high-fives Deadpool and gives him a joyful wave as he drives away.

"See, he doesn't look threatened; he did it of his own free will." Wade waves back, spins on his heel, picks up his duffle bag, and heads towards Sister Margaret's. Walking up the steps, he notices a sign that says, 'CLOSED: GO AWAY!!!' The latter part is underlined and written in red, probably to deter people from coming in. 

Wade flips the sign to say 'open' and enters the bar. "Take that stupid sign. I win again!" Wade mumbles as he walks into the smelly and somewhat sticky bar. He looks around the bar, trying to find Weasle, before yelling for him.

(Isn't that echolocation?)

"OH, honey, daddy's home~"

He can hear a loud groan coming from the back room. He waltzes up to the door and yells from the outside. "Oh dearest~ put your dick away and pay me!" he's made the mistake of swinging open the door mid-jerk. Never. Again.

The door swings open, slamming into Wade. Weasle comes out adjusting his pants and says, " I DON'T PAY YOU!! You need to contact the contractor and talk with them. I only take a fee." Wade comes from behind the door, rubbing his nose. "Ow fuck, I think you actually broke it. And why can't you contact them? You take a hefty fee, might as well use it." Weasle stares at Wade for a while, his conscience slowly leaning him towards helping Wade. 

Finally, he gave in: "Ugh, FINE! But only because you make me a ton of money." Weasle walks behind his bar and turns on his computer. Wade follows, sitting at the stool in front of him. Weasle gives him a side eye and asks. "Ok, why are you here? You usually wait until opening if it's something stupid like this."

(Aw, he knows us so well <3)

Wade shrugs and answers his question. " Mostly money, hint of bullying you, and a dash of 'new job' before anyone can get their grimy hands on the good ones, which falls into the first one, but whatever. Got any?" Weasel rolls his eyes, unhumered by what Wade just said, but before he can think of anything to say back. The screen in front of Weasle lights up. When he looks at the screen, his eyebrows shoot up.

"If I give you a pretty good job, will you leave me alone?" Wade furrows his brow in response to Weasley's question. "That entirely depends on how good 'pretty good' is." Weasle smirks-

[(Ew.)]

He turns his monitor to face Wade, showing him the job he's looking at.

***

TYPE: stalking

$$$: 300.000$ USD

TARGET: PETER BENJAMIN PARKER

    T AGE: 25

    T HEIGHT: 5'9

    T RACE: white

    T OTHER: link

DESCRIPTION: stalk target and report any activity ONLY with photos to this number +1 212.XXX.XXXX

CONTRACTOR: undisclosed

**PAYMENT WILL BE CONSIDERED FORFEITED IF**

number is contacted for reasons outside contract, the target becomes aware of the contract, or law enforcement is aware

***

Wade stares at the monitor. "What the shit? Is this real?! This can't be, you're fucking with me!" Weasle shrugs. "As real as it can get from my end, they already paid the deposit." Wade sits there flabbergasted. He can't believe the number he's seeing on the screen for a stalking job. Usually, most hit jobs range from 50k up towards 1 million if the person is really famous, but that's different; Wade is killing people, not stalking. Stalking jobs usually pay 1k-50k, never more than 100k.

Wade smiles, gets up from his seat, and walks towards the door.

"See you later, pookie. ttyl!"

Wade is riding back to one of his safe houses on the subway.

Borde Wade decides to scroll through the job description again and again. Of course, nothing changes; it's the same vague description as earlier. He clicks on the link to find nothing but an old Facebook page that hasn't been touched in at least 8 years. He searches through the friend list to find a handful of people: May Parker, Mary Jane Watson, and Harry Osborn, and that's it.

(Wow, someone's popular.)

"What the hell did this guy even do for this contract to exist?"

[Maybe that's why there's a contract in the first place? They wanted to know Peter better.]

Wade shakes his head and clicks on May Parker's profile. As he scrolls, he finds that she's Peter's aunt. They're Jewish. Peter works as a photographer and writer at The Daily Bugle, graduated from ESU 20XX, and finally got a job at OSCORP.

White's theory is trashed; May has all of Peter's information on here besides his SSN and where they live.

[You don't know that, maybe the contractor wants more than this, like what he's like or who he likes]

(Yeah, and they paid THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND dollars for that? No way, this guy has to know something.)

Wade nods in agreement. "Yeah, that theory requires a weirdo to be rich enough to spend that much money like it's chump change and like Peter enough to spend it."

He clicks off May's profile to look at the next, Mary Jane Watson. Her profile also looks like it hasn't been used in 8 years, but there are at least posts. He scrolls through and discovers that Peter, Mary, and Harry have been friends since middle school, Peter and Mary have dated, and they all went to prom together.

Great! May is still in the lead with the most information. Wade clicks on the next and final profile, Harry Osborn. His profile is as bare as Mary's and Peter's, but this time, he decides to click on Harry's friend list. The first one is Norman Osborn, the CEO of OSCORP. Wade finally makes the connection. Peter is friends with one of the richest kids, if not the richest, in North America.

Oh holy fuck.

[Is my theory back in play?]

(NO! Harry has been friends with Peter for a long time, so he wouldn't need to hire a stalker to learn more about him.)

Wade doesn't even bother listening to White and Yellow argue with each other. Wade shakes his head. He doesn't need to know who the contractor is, why he's being paid so much, or anything else besides finding Peter and reporting his activity to the contractor.

The subway dings, and he's finally at his stop. He gets up, walks off the train, and walks towards the stairs to leave.

As he approaches the stairs, he notices someone trying to break into an ATM. He stops and stares at the guy for a while. The guy is still trying his hardest, but has gotten nowhere. People have taken photos and videos of this guy trying to break in.

"This poor fucker." Wade walks behind him to stare over his shoulder and see what he's doing wrong. This guy only has a drill and has been drilling in the same spot for almost 5 minutes now. The drill bit is too dull, and Wade is sure this guy doesn't know that he has to push against the drill for it to actually do anything.

Wade can't help but feel bad. He should teach this guy a lesson. If he doesn't, Spider-Man will, and Wade won't rat him out to the police.

So he taps his shoulder and gives him a swift punch to his face. The guy falls back and hits his head on the ATM behind him. The guy quickly gets up and rubs his face.

"Ow, what the fuck? Who in the fuck are you? Knock off Spider-Man? I could make a better costume with my fuckin eyes closed."

The guy immediately rushes towards Wade to punch him, but before he can hit Wade, he moves and trips him with his foot. The thug lands directly on his face. Wade walks up and gives him a swift kick to his gut.

"Ye-ouch! That looked like it stung. I have Neosporin if you need it."

The thug gets up again and pulls out a gun that looks a lot like a toy and points it at Wade.

"Tell me who you are before I blast you're fuckin brains out."

Wade stares at him, "Oh, this guy's going to find out such a cool, fun fact soon." And gives him a thumbs down

The thug growls and shoots Wade's arm clean off. Wade sees his arm fall onto the ground, still holding the thumb out. His eyebrows shoot up in shock. The guy is still holding the gun out. "Are you gonna talk-"

"YOU HAD THAT ALL ALONG? AND NEVER USED IT TO ROB THE ATM? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??"

The guy looks confused, but still answers Wade. "I mean it would get the money."

Wade takes his good arm and faces palms. He grabs one of his guns and shoots the lock of the ATM just right. The machine begins to spit out various bills.

"If you ACTUALLY AIM you can still get the money, fucking moron. Same with me, sure as fuck missed my head dumb ass." Wade points his gun at the thug and shoots him in the head. The guy stands for a second before falling.

He wasn't planning to kill him, but he had it coming after shooting his arm clean off with a weapon that could have gotten into the ATM.

"My god this dude is making a shit name for criminals." Wade picks up his arm and heads towards the man to strip him of his valuables.

Wade grabs the gun, the man's phone, his wallet, and

"Oh?"

Chapter Text

Wade's POV

(Yellow)&[White]

--Thursday--

Wade looks over at his dining table for the nth time, and he's nervous. The image inducer he grabbed off the thug from yesterday sits next to the guy's phone, wallet, and gun. Daunting him.

(Use it, your ugliness is really recognizable as Deadpool)

[Yellow has a point, using it will reduce the chance of being caught as Deadpool.]

Wade grabs the watch and walks into his bathroom to put it on. As he does, a hologram flows over him. He looks like the thief from yesterday; he wastes no time changing his appearance to resemble his former self, before his cancer, before Ajax ruined his life, and before he became 'Deadpool'. But he stands there looking at the mirror. What did he look like?

He knows his eye colors didn't change, his teeth stayed pretty similar, but that's about it. He tries to recall his days in the military. He must have had a buzz cut then. He's pretty sure he had blonde hair. His skin was smoother; there were still acne scars, but nothing like the ones he has now.

(You can choose to look like whoever, but you're focused on making yourself look biblically accurate?)

[Yeah, pick a handsome celebrity, like Pedro Pascal or Adam Sandler.]

"No- Adam Sandler? Anyway, I need to keep a low profile and look normal. I can't stand out." Both yellow and white groan at his persistence. Wade continues to tweak his face, making him look perfectly average, with a hint of Wade Wilson to match. "Looking sharp, Wilson." He gives himself a wink before leaving his bathroom. He heads back to the dining table and grabs the man's wallet, taking out the money and credit cards, and picks up the gun. He looks over it again.

The gun appears odd; it has stripes around it that glow purple, and the light pulsates. There's no way to load the ammo, and it doesn't have a safety either. It's also super light. Wade holds it in his hands and points it towards a wall; it barely feels like he's holding a weapon that can blast off a grown man's arm. The weight is more akin to a Nerf gun. Wade looks over the weapon again and finally notices a logo on it.

"Oscorp? How did that idiot get hold of an Oscorp weapon?"

Wade grabs his bag and leaves his apartment, walking towards the elevator. And calls it to come up to his floor.

Wade never really sees Oscorp weapons, only their mutants. This is more of a Stark Industries thing, not Oscorp. Wade shrugs, thankfully, the guy he's stalking works there, so that he can go on his little side mission.

Wade takes the elevator to the lobby and leaves the complex. He walks towards the nearby subway station to meet Peter at the Daily Bugle and plant a bug on him.

It'll be so much easier to know where he lives. 

Wade watches his train fly by.

"Fuckin eh, I hate New York," While Wade grumbles more complaints, someone bolts down the stairs next to him. The guy groans loudly and shuffles his way to a pillar. Wade chuckles to himself.

(lololol guess he also missed the train)

[At least you're not alone, Wade]

"Yeah, it's not a bad thing to have something in common with a cute twink. Am I crazy, or does he look familiar, right?" Wade squints to try to make out the guy's face, but still can't make out anything.

(Yeah, you're crazy, but he does look familiar.)

[Where have we seen him before?]

Wade pulls out his phone to try to take a picture of his face.

(Inhance image!!)

But before he can, the guy shoots his head up, looking for someone or something. Before he can notice Wade, he pretends to play on his phone.

"Holy shit that scared me. That was some fucking timing."

[Maybe it's a sign for you not to do this, it's kinda super creepy.]

Wade tries to retake a picture, ignoring the Yellow, because he's already doing something super creepy, stalking some random citizen for cash. Instead of taking a picture of just the guy, Wade decides to make it a selfie.

He captures a couple of shots, getting a better look at his face.

Oh jackpot!

Looking at the pictures, Wade recognizes the face from May's Facebook. It's Peter Parker. He turns around to find Peter staring at him. He gives a smile and winks at him. This stalking job has just become a lot easier. Peter gives a weak smile and shakes his head in his hands.

"What a nerd." Wade smiles to himself and continues to watch Peter.

(Stop smiling, it's freaky.)

[I agree, we should focus on getting the photos sent to the contractor.]

Wade rubs his cheeks; he hadn't realized he was smiling. Wade pushes whatever that is away. There is no need to have any thoughts other than to stalk him. He opens his phone and sends the pictures of Peter to the contractor.

***

DP: [photo sent] || 8:45 1✓

+1 212.XXX.XXXX: Why this photo? Please send additional information with photos. || 8:46 1✓

Dp: He rides the A train to the Daily Bugle || 8:46 1✓

***

Wade waits a couple of minutes for the contractor to respond, but nothing happens. He should have expected being left on read.

"This man has zero charm. 4/10, wouldn't date—no 'good job' or 'Thanks' what a dweeb. I don't even know what to send and what not to! That job description said NOTHING!!" Wade lets his head fall back, and he realizes that he's going to be dealing with this dude for God knows how long. Wade groans. He's going to have the time of his life with this contract; he can feel it in his gut.

Wade continues to mope about what is to come soon. However, it is cut off by the train's arrival. He notices the car Peter is getting into and decides to follow.

He sits in front of Peter and uses his phone, with a dash of glancing up at Peter to see if he's doing anything. Which he isn't, but man, Peter looks like he's stressed out of his mind. Wade really wants to poke fun and tease him, but decides against it and plays on his phone, which is boring but safe enough. Wade notices that Peter is getting out at a stop before he has to and glances at Wade one last time before leaving. Wade can't pass up the offer and winks at him. Causing Peter's face to go bright red, scampering out of the train car.

Maybe this won't be too bad.

Wade looks up at the building in front of him. The Daily Bugle currently features an ad with their latest article, showcasing one of the best pictures of Spider-Man that Wade has ever seen.

"Holy fuck, that picture is so hot... do you think the photographer could make me look that good?"

(Who knows. Spidey in crappy photos is still hot.)

[Hard to make him not hot, really.]

"Yeah, but the color grading, the weird curv thing, and his ass. I need that picture hung up. And mine taken for my LinkedIn, this contractor is making me think of new job avenues."

Speaking of jobs, Wade looks around the building, trying to think of a way to get in that: 1. won't raise suspicion, 2. doesn't make him look like a creep, and 3. doesn't lead people to assume he's a stalker.

(Those are all the same thing.)

While looking around, Wade notices a delivery driver pulling up to the Daily Bugle. "Oh, I'm buying a lottery ticket later." Wade waits outside the van for the man to come out. He hops down from the truck and looks back at Wade.

"The fuck, need to get your eyes checked? Or better yet, take a picture and jerk to it later. fucks sake man I'm tryin' to work." Wade is a bit taken aback, but he needs that guy's uniform. "Hey, I need to borrow your uniform for a couple of minutes."

The guy- who was already pretty pissed off, somehow got even angrier. "Oh fuck off, if you're gonna demand me to stip at least pay me. I'm not just any whore." Wade rolls his eyes and pulls out his wallet to give the guy the cash he took from the thug yesterday.

"Whoah, WHOAH, chill, chill. Bro, you 'boutta pull a fuckin' gun on me? For an AMAZON vest? What the fuck is wrong with you? Apply they hire fuckin anybody. That icludes your bum ass."

Why are New Yorkers so mean? Wade stares at the guy deadpan. "Just give me the vest." Wade holds out his hand, clenching it open and closed. The man in the vest rolls his eyes and throws his vest at Wade's face.

"Fuck it, fine. I'm going to take a smoke break; give it back to me after you're done with... Whatever in the fuck you're doin', just don't fuck in it, don't wanna smell that shit all day." Wade immediately throws on the vest and heads into the Daily Bugle.

Before he gets far, he remembers he'll need more than a vest. "Hey, what are you delivering here? Do they need to sign anything?" The guy lights a cigarette and points to the reams of paper in the back of his van. "All of those." Wade groans and hears the guy laugh at him. "Told ya fucker. You also have to make them sign this because the dick inside wants it signed for some fucking reason." Wade grabs the tablet from the man and asks another question.

"Is there any way to grab more than a couple at once?" The guy shrugs, "Depends, sometimes I take my dollie and use that, get about four on, gotta go up and down like 3 times, but if Peter's workin, he'll help. I don't think he likes it in there. Plus, he's strong as hell and can carry like three like it's nothin. Oh yeah, they're going to the 4th floor." Wade looks at the reams of paper, groans, and grabs two to take inside.

The elevator dings, opening to the 4th floor. Wade looks around the office space to find Peter; he's at his desk playing solitaire. Wade huffs a chuckle. Now he needs to do his fake job to do his real one. He walks up to the desk, which resembles a receptionist's desk, and places the reams next to it. The lady picked up the ringing phone to answer it quickly.

"Hello, Daily Bugle, may I put you on hold for a moment?" She places the phone down and looks at Wade up and down. "Are you here to deliver the reams? Where's Andre?" Wade nods. "Yep, today I'm delivering the paper. Andre asked me to cover for him for a while." 

The lady hums unhappily and mumbles to herself. "he did?"

(Oh, she is so into him.)

Maybe, Andre will get the sick out of his ass, if I tell him he has a chance.

She shakes her head and introduces herself. "I'm Betty, Jameson's secretary. I can sign for the delivery. And you are?" She holds out her hand for the tablet; Wade gives it to her and answers.

"Oh, I'm Wade, delivery driver and part-time matchmaker." He leans on the desk. "Got a thing for Andre? I can hook you up."

Betty finishes signing for the delivery and holds back a blush. "That's none of your business. Here." She hands the tablet back with a bit of force. "Do you need help with the reams? I think Peter's about to lose his mind." Wade nods.

"While I'm certainly jacked, I'm not going to turn down free help," Betty hums and smirks, calling Peter over. "Peter, can you come here for a second?" Peter gets up from his chair and looks confused until he sees Wade. His face drops into an almost scared look, and a blush engulfs his face as he walks up to Betty's desk. "What's up?"

Betty swivels her chair to face Peter and tells him what's going on. "Oh, Peter! Meet Wade. He's the new delivery driver assigned here. Can you please help him bring up the reams of paper? I have to finish this call." Betty picks up the phone to resume the call, and Peter nods and faces Wade. "Hey, didn't think we'd meet each other again so soon? What a coinkydink!"

Peter walks past him and towards the stairs. "Yeah, small world or whatever. Anyway! Where are we going?" Wade smiles, pleased. "We're heading down to the street, and why not take the elevator?" Peter stops, and Wade catches up to him. Peter looks up to meet Wade's eyes. He sighs in defeat. "Ok, let's take the elevator."

Wade pushes the button to call the elevator up, and they both wait. "Have you seen the picture of Spider-Man plastered on the side of this building?" Peter freezes and nods stiffly.

(wtf, why such a weird reaction)

Wade continues the conversation. "Isn't it an amazing picture? Well, any picture of Spider-Man is an amazing picture, really. But man, that photography." Wade's chef kisses."I wanna see if they'll sell any to me." Peter stares at him, astonished.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Peter scratches the back of his head. "Sorry, I don't mean to. It's just, I'm the one who took the photo; actually, I take all of Spider-Man's pictures for the Daily Bugle." The elevator opens, and they both walk in.

Wade hasn't said a word for a bit. A bomb shell just dropped on him.

Peter is close enough to Spider-Man to take photos like that? Just who could he be to him?

[I think Peter being evil is out of the picture.]

(Oh yeah, with Spider-Man, I doubt that puritist would let anyone remotely evil into his social circle.)

Then it hits Wade like a ton of bricks. He has to stalk Spider-Man's photographer for God knows how long, and who knows what their relationship is like. Wade can feel himself wanting to quit this job.

(Yeah, either quit or get the shit beaten out of you by Spider-Man. Your choice.")

Peter looks over at Wade. He seems concerned. "Are you alright?" Wade shakes his head. "No, I mean yes, it's just. I was embarrassed because of all those things I said." Wade can feel the guilt begin to form in the pit of his stomach. Peter laughs. "But not embarrassed to wink at me twice? And flirt in front of a coworker? God, she's going to bring that up to me later, and I don't know if I'm ready to explain that."

Peter's laugh helps the guilt subside, only for it to come rushing back. "Really? She doesn't seem like someone to meddle." Peter scoffs. "You'd be surprised, but she's nothing compared to MJ; she'll try to play matchmaker all the time." Peter looks happy talking about his friends.

"Doesn't seem like you dislike it all that much." Peter shrugs. "I don't, it's nice to know that someone is thinking about you that much, they meddle."

The elevator stops and opens to the lobby, and they both step out and head to the street to retrieve the reams of paper from the van. Both of them can take six boxes each trip. It doesn't take them long to finish the job. Peter smiles at Wade and gives him a little wave as he returns to his desk.

Wade begins to head out, but before he can get far, Betty calls for him. "Pst, Wade, come here." She waves him over. "Are you interested in Peter, romantically, by any chance?"

Wade wants to say no, cause he's not really romantically interested; he's just doing a job. But because he's doing a job, he says. "Yeah, why do you think I got a chance?" Betty smiles. "Oh yeah, you have the build of a ceritin heroic arachnid. And I think Peter would be all over that. Plus, him and his on-and-off boyfriend are currently off, and I want it to stay that way."

Wade nods. "What's a good way to get close to him?" Betty looks over at Peter and back at Wade. "Hmm. Food, ask him to hang out and grab food together. He likes simple, don't go all out." Wade nods again. Thanks, I'll be sure to put in a good word for you with Andre." Betty has a blush creeping up and waves him away.

Wade makes his way down the stairs and back outside. He notices Andre is leaning on the van. "You're done? Finally, gimme my vest back." Wade throws it back at him and hands him the cash he was trying to give him earlier. Andre looks shocked and accepts the money.

"By the way, Betty has a thing for you." Andre jumps up. "Fuck yes! I fucking knew it. Damn I wasn't actually planing to fuck with you but damn dude, You're not to bad." Andre dabs him and hops into the van and drives off. Wade smiles. He didn't know that helping strangers with random things would actually feel good.

Now I'm hungry.

Chapter Text

Peter's POV

--Thrusday--

Peter exits the Daily Bugle and starts walking home. He looks up at the trees. They're changing colors already.

I guess it's already fall.

Peter smiles at the colors; they remind him of Wade for some reason. Peter shugs and keeps walking. It's probably because red seems like a color that would really suit him. Wade is so... violently himself, it's really admirable. He's surprisingly sensitive to what other people think about. Being embarrassed to say that he liked Peter's picture and Spider-Man, but not ashamed to wink and flirt with him.

Peter stops at the crosswalk. Is Wade really into him? Peter bites his lower lip. He's not against the idea. Peter's even starting to embrace it, Wade's charming, easy to get along with, and ripped. Wade's build must be something else. If Peter can tell that he's jacked with a hoodie on, he's got to look like a Greek god under that hoodie.

God, what would a hug feel like from him? Fuck, what would anything feel like from him? Could he pick me up?

Peter cuts his thoughts off and crosses the street. He shouldn't be thinking things that could provoke a boner. He can't handle walking around with one in public. Peter groans and tries to think of something else, but his mind keeps returning to Wade, and his... Assets.

Wade's massive, and he's not even much taller than me, well maybe his d-

Before Peter can finish the perverted thought, his phone starts buzzing.

***

Harry: Heyyy Pete!! || 5:34 1✓

Harry: Do you want to meet for drinks tonight? || 5:34 1✓

Harry: My treat! || 5:34 1✓

***

 Peter grips his phone tightly. Anxiety starts to pool in his chest. A part of him wants to see his friend of 14 years, while another part of him doesn't want to meet up after they broke up not that long ago. And Peter knows why Harry is doing this. He doesn't want to end things yet. And honestly, neither does Peter, but he knows it's better for both of them if they stop dating. They can't get back together no matter what.

Peter groans and replies to the text.

***

Peter: Sounds great! || 5:40 1✓

Peter: Where do u wanna meet? || 5:40 1✓

Peter: On a fine weekday lolol || 5:40 1✓

***

Peter worries that he's being too awkward in the text message. Peter shakes his head, whatever, it's nothing Harry hasn't seen before. 

Harry texts back immediately.

***

Harry: dw a couple drinks won't do much to a heavyweight like u || 5:41 1✓

Harry: We can go to the place we went last time, does that work? || 5:41 1✓

Peter: lol sounds great c u there!! || 5:42 1✓

***

Peter can already feel himself slipping.

Peter shakes his head and groans; he needs to clear his head; too much is happening today.

Maybe a jog will help

Peter jogs up to the block where the bar is located, and he immediately spots Harry. He's wearing a green pinstripe suit with a black undershirt paired with a deep red tie. An outfit that Peter loves.

Harry spots Peter and waves. "PETER!!"

Peter can't help but chuckle and wave back to him. Harry begins walking towards Peter with a big smile. His dark brown hair is ruffled purposely to look messy; his tie is loose, just past his collarbone, with the top few buttons undone. Peter can see Harry's tanned chest, which must have been freshly shaved, topped with Peter's favorite cologne.

Harry gives Peter a genuine smile that sets the pieces in motion to create a perfect storm.

Peter has to mentally slap himself not to lean into Harry's space, hug his neck, call drinks off, and ask Harry if he wants to go to his place with a nip at his ear.

FOCUS PARKER!!!

He still indulges himself just a bit. He's not a saint. Peter smiles back and greets Harry with a hug. Harry hugs Peter back and whispers, "It's great to see you again." Peter's not sure if he was even supposed to hear that or not.

Peter blushes as he hugs Harry, almost moaning the words into Peter's ear; he breaks off the hug with a couple of taps on his shoulder. And clears his throat. "It's great to see you, too, Harry. How was your day?"

Harry's smile doesn't falter, and he answers Peter with a shrug. "Pretty boring up until now, I thought I was going to lose my mind in those meetings. I'm glad you accepted my offer, it's great seeing you."

Peter smiles at Harry. "Why wouldn't I accept a drink offer? Sure, we're broken up, but you're still one of my best friends." Harry shrugs. "I was worried because you can't really enjoy drinking."

Peter jabs him in the side jokingly. "That doesn't really matter to me, I just won't drink it's fine. Now come on, we should go in." Harry smiles and accepts.

When they enter the bar, they find a couple of seats left and claim them. The bartender comes up and asks them what kind of drinks they would like. Peter only asks for water, and Harry asks for 2 shots of vodka.

After the bartender leaves, Peter looks at Harry confused. "2 shots? Is everything alright?" Harry nods. "Yeah, I need to get the nerve to ask what I want to ask you, I don't think I can do it sober, honestly.

Peter's gut twists; he knows that Harry is going to ask him to get back together with him. Peter mentally prepares himself to reject Harry.

As Peter is still prepping himself up, Harry rambles off on a different topic, trying to ease the mood.

When the bartender brings the drinks, Harry wastes no time and downs both shots. And asks for another two. Peter stares at him. "What do you need to tell me that you can't say sober?"

Harry responds. "Well. It's... I can't really explain it without telling you, don't worry, you'll find out what it is in a minute. You might not hate the idea so much." The bartender brings the last two shots, and Harry downs them and hands the bartender his card.

Peter frowns, "Harry, are you sure you need to tell me this drunk?" Harry nods. "Oh yeah, while I'm pretty confident in my looks, I don't think that's gonna be enough," 

Peter smirks and pokes fun at Harry. "And you think being drunk will persuade me?"

Harry shugs. "I think of it as courage, with a dash of fun. I'm still the Harry Osborne, just more... Charming."

Peter chuckles. "Yeah, charming, nothing else." He can't help but smile with Harry, even knowing what's to come, he loves spending time with him.

After a couple moments of them talking back and forth poking fun at one another, Harry seems to be a bit drunk. He clears his throat and grabs Peter's hands. "Alright, I think I'm drunk enough to ask now."

Peter's smile fades as he realizes what he has to say next.

Harry takes a deep breath and says, "You know why I dressed like this, you're smart, so Peter, is- are-, can we still be together? At least physically? I don't mind if you use me for my body, I still want to be with you. I won't even see other people, I only want you."

What the fuck???

Peter's face begins to burn red. He's shocked at what Harry proposed. He was expecting Harry to ask to be boyfirends again, NOT fuck buddies.

He manages to squeak out a "what?" Harry grips his hands tighter. "I want you to use me." Harry pulls Peter's hands closer to his body, touching his chest. "You only have to say the word." Peter can hardly believe what is happening right now.

"Well, um, Harry. I'll definitely think about it and tell you when you're sober." lights up, he was expecting total rejection but got an 'I'll think about it.'

"Yes! Think about it. Think about how compatible we are in bed. Think about how I already know your favorite positions, I know how to make you cu-" before Harry can finish his sentence, Peter throws his hands over Harry's mouth. He's too embarrassed to let Harry finish what he's about to say.

Harry smiles at Peter's blushing and licks his palm. Peter jolts and wipes his spit off on his clothes. Harry grabs his card from the bartender and grabs Peter's hand to leave.

fuck.

Peter helps Harry walk straight. Trying to enter the subway station

Harry's incredibly drunk; he can't stay balanced, nor is he aware of his surroundings. He barely manages to get Harry through the turnstile. Peter shakes his head. He can't believe Harry downed four shots of vodka on a Thursday.

"Pete i- lets go to sleep." Peter looks over at Harry and sees him dozing off. Peter is about to wake him up, but decides carrying him asleep will be easier.

Peter groans. "What the fuck is today?" And grabs Harry to try and walk him down the stairs.

Why are so many weird things happening to me?

As Peter gets to the bottom of the stairs, he drags Harry over to a bench to sit him down. He takes a deep sigh and sits next to him.

"Why such a long face?" Peter furrows his brow.

That voice sounds familiar.

Peter looks in the direction of the voice to see Wade smiling at him.