Chapter Text
24 September 2024
[19:23]
Colin Who?
Daph: Mayday mayday
Greg: 🚨
Daph: So…my plan may not have gone quite the way I intended
Ant: Say more.
Hy: 👀
Daph: I just talked to Alfie
Daph: Apparently P and C fought at dinner and P left with him
Soph: penelope left with colin? isn’t that a good thing?
Daph: No, not with Colin
Daph: She left with Alfie
Greg: well shit
Ant: Language.
Greg: 🙄
Ben: i mean you did set her up on a date with him
Ben: what did you expect to happen
Hy: thats what i said!!!
Hy: were supposed to be setting them up w each other not randos
Daph: They’re not randos!
Daph: Alfie and Sita happen to both be very nice people
Soph: im sure they are but aren’t we trying to get colin and penelope with each other?
Fran: You were playing the jealous angle I assume, Daph?
Daph: Yes! I thought if C got jealous enough it would force him to finally make a move
Kate: It’s not a bad thought.
Mick: actually yeah i agree
Mick: you should have seen him when i tried shooting my shot with her at the pub a few years ago
Mick: thought he’d dislocate his jaw with how hard he was clenching it
Ant: Well good idea or no, that’s not relevant now since it didn’t work. I assume you’ve confirmed nothing has changed between Colin and Penelope since Saturday?
Daph: 😞
Daph: C won’t return my texts
Daph: Or Simon’s
El: so what you’re saying is nobody won this stupid game that I said you shouldn’t have played in the first place?
Hy: u played too
Hy: “oh no they r both staying at mine and theres only 1 bed!”
El: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!
Greg: sure jan
27 September 2024
[20:19]
Mama Violet 💐: I just overheard a very interesting argument between my two youngest. Care to fill me in?
[Kate Bridgerton is inviting Violet Bridgerton to a Facetime call]
[Call ended, duration 0:12]
27 September 2024
[20:34]
Kate Bridgerton added Michaela Stirling to the Spouses Support Group chat
Kate Bridgerton renamed the chat Better Halves
Kate: Alright team, we let them have their fun and they made a right mess of things. I think it’s time we take things into our own hands.
Soph: I couldn’t agree more!
Mick: hear hear
Simon: About time
Soph: omg simon actually responded!
Mick: i didn’t know your phone even had a keyboard mate
Simon: And I fully expect you to maintain that perception outside of this circle. Understood?
Michaela Stirling liked a message, Sophie Bridgerton liked a message, Kate Bridgerton liked a message
Soph: so what did you have in mind?
Kate: We need to force them to actually SEE each other.
Kate: So they recognize their own feelings AND realise that those feelings are reciprocated.
Mick: yeah if they could just see what we see it’d all be over
Soph: maybe we look through everyone’s photos to see if we captured anything we could show them?
Mick: thats not a bad idea if we can find something good
Kate: What about the photos Ben took for his show? Didn’t he say he put them in all sorts of intimate poses?
Soph: that’s right he did! I saw some of them while he was painting and they are PERFECT
Soph: no one could look at those and miss how they’re looking at each other
Mick: so we get our hands on those, print them, and then just slide an envelope under their door the old fashioned way?
Simon: They’d still somehow manage not to look
Kate: Right. Whatever we do has to be foolproof.
Soph: …
Mick: …
Simon: …
Kate: What if they were part of Ben’s gallery show? We could frame some of them and say Ben’s dabbling in photography. Think you can talk him into that Soph?
Soph: actually, I might be able to do one better
[20:44]
Mick: ??
[20:52]
Mick: you’re killing us here soph
Soph: sorry! had to chat with Ben
Kate: What happened to keeping this between us?
Soph: i didn’t tell him why! he thinks it was his idea
Mick: WHAT was his idea?
Soph: what if instead of the photos, he paints them? like properly paints them, as many as he can manage between now and the show
Simon Basset emphasized a message
Kate: Sophie, that’s brilliant.
Mick: we just gotta make sure they actually go to the show
Mick: i wouldn’t put it past colin to just leave town
Kate: Right. I’ll make sure Ant puts the pressure on a bit.
Mick: if any of them can get him there it’s frannie, he never says no to her
Mick: i’ll make sure she goes down for it and lets him know she’ll be there
Kate: Eloise will probably bring Penelope as her plus one, but maybe we could text her to confirm.
Soph: I can do it
Soph: I’ll say we need a final headcount for the caterer or something
Kate: Good thinking.
Kate: Okay, so we’re all in agreement? Sophie, you text E about Penelope, and get B to paint as many of the photos as he can before the gallery show. Mick and I will get F and A to pressure C into going. And Simon…
Simon: Yes?
Kate: Well, just keep doing what you usually do I guess. Don’t want Daphne getting suspicious or she’ll meddle.
Simon: Copy that.
Kate: And no one let them know what we’re up to!
Mick: 🫡
Soph: 🫡
Simon: 🫡
27 September 2024
[20:56]
Kate Bridgerton: Things are in motion.
Violet Bridgerton loved a message.
Mama Violet 💐: That’s wonderful, dear.
20 October 2024
[14:22]
Better Halves
Soph: we have a problem
Simon Basset questioned a message
Mick: uh oh
Kate: Don’t say that!
Mick: whats going on?
Soph: Penelope isn’t going to the gallery show
Kate: What??
Mick: shit
Kate: Why not? Are you sure?
Soph: I’m sure
Soph: El said she suddenly has a work event that night
Soph: but like, it sounded like it’s maybe a last minute thing
Mick: do we think she is just trying to get out of seeing colin?
Soph: that’s honestly kind of what it sounded like
Kate: Okay.
Kate: Nothing to panic over.
Kate: I think we can recover from this.
Kate: Maybe we just focus our efforts on Colin.
Mick: yeah i actually think you have a point
Mick: we really just need him to figure things out bc once he does there will be no stopping him
Simon: Yeah you all weren’t around for Marina, but he proposed to her in a matter of weeks, everyone else be damned
Simon: Once he sorts out his feelings and knows Penelope feels the same way? He’s a goner
Michaela Stirling liked a message, Sophie Bridgerton liked a message, Kate Bridgerton liked a message
25 October 2024
[17:21]
mr. hyde: ur gonna keep me updated 2nite right????
mr. hyde: i cant believe im missing it
family pet: new phone who dis?
mr. hyde: i hate u
25 October 2024
[17:44]
Hy Me a River: hows the party
duchess: Colin’s not here yet
Hy Me a River: tell me when he is?
Hy Me a River: pretty pls 🙏
duchess: Can’t talk right now, I need to find the caterer
Hy Me a River: its not even ur party???
25 October 2024
[17:56]
ITS BOUQUET: good luck w ur show 2nite!!! 🤗 🤩 😃
Picasso: i know you’re just fishing for updates on c + p
ITS BOUQUET: and ur gonna send some right?
ITS BOUQUET: right????
25 October 2024
[18:19]
The Hywayman: somebody pls tell me what is happening
antman: Aren’t you meant to be writing a paper right now?
25 October 2024
[18:21]
Hyde & Seek: kaaaaaaate
Hyde & Seek: i need intel
Hyde & Seek: pls pls pls
wasp: All I know is he told your mum he’s coming.
25 October 2024
[18:47]
Hy-ci-ya (hold tight): take pity on ur poor bb sister
Hy-ci-ya (hold tight): no one is telling me anything 😢
francy feast: Colin just got here
Hy-ci-ya (hold tight): AND???
Hy-ci-ya (hold tight): 👀
francy feast: Nothing else yet, he’s just talking to Ben
Hy-ci-ya (hold tight): 😒
25 October 2024
[20:36]
Colin Who?
Daph: Did he just leave??
Soph: yes!
Hy: omg is it happening????
Soph: he asked El where she is and then ran out
Hy: 🥺
Greg: should we follow? 🤔
Ant: NO.
Daph: No!
Soph: no
El: absolutely not
Greg: FINE
25 October 2024
[20:38]
mr. hyde: ur gonna follow right??
family pet: i tried but ant stopped me
mr. hyde: 😩
25 October 2024
[20:38]
Mama Violet 💐: Did Colin just leave?
Kate Bridgerton: He did.
Mama Violet 💐: Is everything okay?
Kate Bridgerton: More than okay.
Kate Bridgerton: He’s going after Penelope ♥️
Mama Violet 💐: Oh that is wonderful news! Good work, dear.
Kate Bridgerton: Thanks for your help pushing him in the right direction.
Mama Violet 💐: Of course. I haven’t forgotten our agreement. All credit goes to you in exchange for ensuring Penelope becomes my newest daughter-in-law.
Kate Bridgerton: I can’t guarantee that part, remember? That’s on Colin.
Mama Violet 💐: Oh I know. I believe in him though.
Kate Bridgerton: Me too ♥️
“Alright, you two, it’s time for you to finally spill,” Michaela demanded.
“Yeah, we’ve had enough of this dodging and cryptic nonsense,” said Benedict. “Give us the whole story.”
Other voices chimed in from around the drawing room.
“It’s been weeks!”
“Not showing up to brunch so you wouldn’t have to talk to us was low.”
“Seriously, fess up already.”
Penelope cast a glance at Colin and sighed, trying to keep the amused smile off her face. They’d known it was coming—had even stayed up late strategizing the past few nights, anticipating the family inquisition. After talking in circles for what felt like hours, they’d finally come up with a plan of attack, deciding to tell mostly the truth (while leaving a few of the more salacious details to the imagination).
“Well,” Penelope began, smiling a touch nervously. The hush that had fallen over the room was as thick as it was unnatural. She didn’t think she had ever heard a gathering of Bridgertons this silent. There was usually at least someone whispering in the corner, or teasing under their breath. Now, it was as though each person were holding their breath, hanging on her every word. It felt strange, but also a bit thrilling, having such a captive audience. “You might be surprised to hear, but I’ve actually had feelings for Colin for quite a while.”
Gregory sniggered from his seat on the sofa, and Hyacinth elbowed him hard in the ribs, eliciting a pained “Hey!” Anthony glanced their way disapprovingly, but didn’t say anything.
Slightly abashed, Penelope amended, “Alright, well maybe it’s not that surprising to some of you.”
Daphne shot her an apologetic look. “I think we all knew, actually.”
“Except Colin,” Benedict chimed in helpfully.
“And Eloise,” Gregory added under his breath.
Eloise shot him a scathing look. “I heard that! And I’ll admit I might have…missed it…for a while, but I got there eventually.”
“Well it took you long enough,” Hyacinth sniped. “Only an idiot could have missed the way they looked at each other.” She rolled her eyes pointedly at Colin, who shifted in his seat, working his jaw in frustration. Penelope reached over to put a hand on his thigh, squeezing gently.
“No offence, Penelope,” Hyacinth added. Then she added in a stage whisper, “I blame my brother.”
Colin had spent the past six weeks apologising to Penelope every chance he got for not having recognized his feelings earlier, for not having really seen her. She’d finally convinced him that he had nothing to be sorry for, but she knew that Hyacinth’s comment had rankled.
“Right, well then, thanks for that everybody,” Penelope said, louder than necessary, her cheeks warm. She’d been convinced that she’d hidden her feelings so well all these years, only to learn that everyone in the room had apparently been fully aware of her, at least at the time, unrequited love for Colin. It felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over her head. She tried in earnest to maintain some semblance of dignity as she continued.
“So as you apparently all knew, I had feelings for Colin, but I didn’t think he felt the same way. Then, well…he did—it just took him a while to tell me. Once he figured it out and confessed everything though, that was it really. There’s not much more to tell.” She glanced around the room at the dozen incredulous faces staring back at her. “What?” she asked, exasperation seeping into her tone. “I’d been in love with the man most of my life. Did you really expect me to make him wait around once he told me he felt the same way? Should I have made him grovel?”
“Yes,” Benedict interjected with a cheeky grin. “Obviously.”
She caught the roll of Colin’s eyes beside her, and felt her lips twitch with a contained laugh.
“Who cares about that now?” demanded Hyacinth dramatically. “We want to know how it happened. We want details, Penelope!”
Details. Like the way his hot breath against her neck turned her insides to molten fire. Or the way his fingertips scraping along the swell of her breasts made her writhe with need. The sound of her name on his lips as she rode him to exhaustion. The way she was always wet for him, always wanting. They’d spent much of the past few weeks together in bed. And in the shower. And on the couch. And on the counters of his new flat. Even on his balcony late one night, giggles turning to moans as they tried not to alert the neighbours to their activities. (She still couldn’t make eye contact with Rajesh from 4C whenever she ran into him in the lift, certain their recent exploits had not gone unnoticed.)
But she couldn’t share any of that here, so she shook herself out of it, trying to ignore the feeling of his warm body beside her, removing her hand from his muscular thigh with a clearing of her throat.
Luckily, Colin seemed to notice her hesitation and jumped in, always so attuned to her needs in a way that made her feel weak with adoration. “Well, I left Ben’s gallery show early, as you all know, and I ran to the hotel where Pen was having her book event–”
“–Hang on…”
“–Wait!”
“–Colin.”
He paused in irritation at the commotion as everyone began speaking over each other, finally asking exasperatedly, “What?”
It was Daphne who took it upon herself to speak for the group, explaining patiently, “We want the whole story of course, Colin, but start at the beginning. What finally clued you in to how you felt? Was it…jealousy, perhaps? Seeing Penelope with someone else?”
“Oi!” Gregory shouted indignantly. “That’s not fair!”
“No leading the witness, Daph,” Anthony cautioned.
She stuck her tongue out at him and Penelope bit back a laugh at the usually refined Daphne—a literal Duchess—behaving like a bratty sister.
“Fine!” Daphne granted. “Strike the bit about jealousy. But the rest of the question stands.” She shot a sharp look at her eldest brother, who nodded his approval.
“I don’t know exactly when it happened. Or how.” Colin exhaled, looking thoughtful. “It was a lot of things, really. For ages, I’d been getting these flashes of feeling something…more…but I kept brushing them aside, not allowing myself to really think about them. They’d hit me in quick little bursts, like lightning, where suddenly my whole world just lit up, and I could see everything clearly for just the briefest moment…but then it always went dark again. I convinced myself each time that the feelings weren’t real, that they were just…mixed signals in my brain. I just couldn’t accept that anything had changed between us.” He looked over at Penelope, his gaze softening. “But, then again, maybe nothing really changed at all. Maybe I’ve always felt this way and it just took me this long to see it.”
Penelope was gazing at him intently, noting every subtle expression as he spoke. She knew that his explanation was no longer just for his siblings—it was for her as well.
He continued, “By the time we went to Bath I’d finally figured it all out, and I was planning to tell her there, but…” He glanced at Pen again, a slight furrow between his eyes that she wanted to reach out and smooth away with her fingertip. She mouthed an apology, wondering how things might have been different if she’d been braver, if she hadn’t run. “Well, it didn’t really work out,” he finished lamely.
Hyacinth sprang to her feet with a triumphant shout, accidentally knocking Gregory’s beer out of his hand. There was a brief flurry of activity as a rag was fetched to mop up the mess on the carpet, and the beer was replaced with a new one from the pack on the counter. When the chaos had finally died down, Hyacinth announced to the room, “So, he knew he loved her in Bath, and he tried to tell her while they were there. I really think that means I win.”
A series of shouts and bickering erupted before Eloise’s voice rang out above all the rest. “He tried to tell her in Bath, meaning he didn’t tell her in Bath, so they didn’t get together, so that’s not a win! If anything, you almost ruined it!”
“But–”
Kate jumped in over Hyacinth’s continued protests, stating in a ringing authoritative tone, “Eloise is correct. The objective was for them to enter into a relationship with one another. That didn’t happen on your turn, Hy, so unless they say that your little weekend getaway was what spurred their eventual romance, you did not fulfill the objective.”
She threw a pointed glance at the couple, perfectly manicured eyebrows raised. Penelope just shrugged and shook her head—she hadn’t told Eloise about sleeping with Colin in Bath, and she didn’t think she was quite ready to have that conversation right now with the entire Bridgerton family, Violet included.
“Wait, so if it’s whatever ‘spurred their eventual romance’ then is my boat thing back on the table?” Gregory interjected.
“No!” several voices responded at once.
Everyone was talking over one another, except for Violet, who looked oddly peaceful amongst the chaos, a small smile on her lips. Penelope met Colin’s eyes and he just shrugged, neither of them at all taken aback by the melee surrounding them. If fisticuffs broke out right there amidst the damasks and silks of the drawing room, no one would have been particularly surprised.
Eventually the chaos seemed to reach a peak, and Colin sighed exasperatedly, then stood, rising to his full height.
“Stop!” His voice cut through the noise, and, perhaps more from shock at his now furious tone than anything else, they all did. Colin glared around the room at each of his siblings in turn, glowering menacingly. Penelope was rather impressed by his imposing figure. He was usually so composed, so gentle. This was a whole other side of him, one she was sure his siblings weren’t used to either, judging by their apprehensive expressions. “Somebody needs to tell me what the bloody hell—er, sorry mum (he glanced rather sheepishly at his mother, who was looking stern)—what exactly is going on here.”
A long silence followed as everyone looked to one another, deciding who would speak on behalf of the group, the tension palpable. Finally, Anthony spoke up.
“We couldn’t all just sit around and watch you avoid your feelings anymore.”
“You’re one to talk,” muttered Daphne under her breath, but Anthony ignored her.
“I’ll admit some lines may have been crossed, but I assure you we only wanted the best for both of you…” He trailed off, grimacing uncomfortably as though he had swallowed something rather foul.
“And?” Colin prompted coldly.
Anthony sighed, but continued. “And a bet was placed as to who among us could set up a scenario which would serve as catalyst to you finally admitting your feelings for one another.”
Penelope glanced sideways at Colin. He looked furious, his jaw tense and fists clenched hard at his sides. She reached over and took his warm hand in hers, gripping it tightly and pulling him down to sit beside her once again, though he remained taut, like a coiled spring ready to snap.
Francesca jumped in then, speaking in a soothing tone. “We shouldn’t have meddled, of course, but it was just so clear to all of us how you two felt about each other.” Her eyes met Penelope’s. “We just wanted to see you both happy.”
Penelope swallowed. She knew it was true. That, and that a Bridgerton could never resist a bet. Once it had been proposed, nothing on earth could have stopped them all from fighting to the death to claim victory. And, well, it had led to this hadn’t it? Colin’s hand in hers, the two of them surrounded by the people who loved them most in the world, who had been so committed to their relationship that they’d all gone a little off the deep end fighting for it.
“How long?” she asked, more curious now than anything.
“About a year,” Michaela answered. “That When Harry Met Sally showing—that was mine and Frannie’s attempt. We went first.”
Penelope’s mouth pursed and her brow furrowed as she thought back on the past year, trying to figure out all the ways in which she and Colin had been manipulated. They had already figured out a few of the more obvious instances—Hyacinth booking them the “Ultimate Romance Package” for one, as well as–
“The double date was part of this, I assume?” she asked Daphne, who nodded.
“We were getting desperate,” she explained. “Nothing else had worked! I thought maybe making Colin jealous would force him to make a move.” (Penelope sensed a new wave of anger to her left and again squeezed Colin’s hand as Daphne continued.) “Plus, I figured if worse came to worst and you two never figured things out, at least you’d have another option in Alfie, who I did genuinely think you might get on with.”
Penelope nodded, considering this information. “I do think Alfie’s a good guy,” she allowed. Colin shifted in his seat, and she quickly added, “But we really aren’t at all that compatible in the end. Besides, he’s off to the Arctic in a few months.”
“He’d better be,” murmured Colin sulkily under his breath beside her. She fought back an amused smile. She knew she shouldn’t be so charmed by his outlandish jealousy, but really she thought it was sweet, if exasperating at times.
“Well,” Penelope began, trying to decide whether to let them off easily or make them sweat a bit more. “I guess–”
“Who did it?” Colin asked sternly, his voice cold as ice.
“Uh, it was all of us, mate,” Michaela explained placatingly. “The bet was technically between the siblings, but we all got involved.”
“Whose idea was it then?” Colin looked from face to guilty face in turn, his voice rising as he again stood and demanded, “Who’s responsible?”
Furtive glances were thrown amongst the group, no one quite making eye contact with Colin or Penelope now. In fact, she’d never seen most of them look so guilty. Finally, Colin seemed to lose patience with the lack of answers, singling out Hyacinth with a glare.
“Hy. Spill. Who did it? Was it you? I knew you were up to something with that hotel thing.”
Hyacinth’s eyes widened in alarm before she scowled, ready to fight back. Instead, Anthony leapt from his seat. “Hey, take it easy on her!”
Colin whirled around, redirecting his fury toward his eldest brother. “Well then? Are you going to tell me? Was it you, dear brother? You do realise the whole thing almost blew up in your faces, right? What if she hadn’t forgiven me?!”
Penelope could hear the pain and desperation in his voice and stood up, ready to cut in. This hadn’t been part of their plan.
“Hey," she murmured soothingly, clutching his hand even tighter. “That’s not possible, okay?” He let out a shuddering breath, but otherwise didn’t react, his teary gaze still fixed on his brother’s face.
Anthony returned the stare until Kate sighed heavily and got to her feet beside him.
“Fine,” she said, meeting Colin’s gaze unflinchingly. “I may have had a hand in it.”
“More organised the whole thing…” Gregory muttered under his breath.
“I didn’t organise the whole thing,” Kate countered.
“Well, you did draft the rules of engagement and subsequent addendum,” Anthony pointed out in a pompous tone.
“Wow. That’s your husband throwing you under the bus there, Kate,” teased Benedict, looking gleeful. “Hope you like your sofa, Ant, because I bet you’ll be sleeping on it for a while!” Sophie giggled, looking nervous.
Kate just rolled her eyes, still waiting on Colin’s judgement.
Colin hadn’t moved, just watched her through narrowed eyes. “So,” he finally mused, his voice soft and face unreadable. “You’re the one responsible for this whole thing?”
“Yes!” someone cried from Penelope’s left.
“She did it!”
“Totally her idea, bro.”
Kate looked around the room, hissing under her breath, “Traitors.” She turned back to Colin and Penelope, bracing herself for whatever was to come.
But instead of shouting, Colin’s face broke and he grinned his signature crooked grin, all trace of anger gone. “Well then, I guess congratulations are in order,” he pronounced, holding out his hand toward his sister-in-law.
Several gasps could be heard around the room as a self-satisfied smile spread on Kate’s face. She took Colin’s hand, giving it a firm shake.
“WHAT?” Hyacinth screeched. “No way!”
“You all said it was Kate’s doing, so I’d say that makes her the winner,” Colin explained cheerily.
“We only said that because we thought you were pissed!” Gregory whined.
“She wasn’t even eligible!”
Everyone began shouting at once, arguments bouncing around the room as claims of credit and accusations of rule-breaking erupted. Amid the chaos, Colin leaned close to Penelope, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her tightly against him.
“Well,” he murmured in her ear, his voice low and sincere, “I suppose we do have all of them to thank, in a way.”
Penelope looked up at him, her face alight with a warm, adoring smile. “Maybe a little. But I think we might’ve managed just fine on our own.”
She stood up on her toes, moving her arms to wrap around his neck as he leaned down and kissed her sweetly, the wonderfully chaotic sounds of his family—their family—surrounding them. She sighed happily as she pulled back from the kiss, linking her fingers with his and nodding suggestively toward the door.
And as the bickering went on, Violet was the only one who noticed them slip quietly out of the room, hand in hand.
12 December 2024
[21:54]
Frandalorian: You already knew, didn’t you?
Colin ✈️: 😉