1 - 20 of 71 Works in James Bond Has Issues

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    He broke in.

    Unfortunately for the sanctity of the window in the guest bathroom, the front entrance was too heavily fortified.

    He slipped in, vaguely grunting as the action pulled at his barely scabbing wounds. His deerskin loafers made no sound as he crept forward, avoiding the subtle tripwires hidden carefully in the warm wooden flooring.

    At last, he reached the master bedroom, and carefully turned the knob. The gentle pull to open it was nerve wracking, even for an agent as experienced as him.

    There was an immediate flurry of movement, and his heart started to pound, his network of capillaries flooding with adrenaline as a sleek, modified glock was pointed at him.

    It lowered a moment later. ”Bond?”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,804
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    32
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    393
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Madeleine was familiar with lovely prisons, being forced to take refuge in places whose beauty only highlighted her own lack of choice. The difference was, when she had been trapped in the gilded cages of her childhood home or the Hoffler Klinik, she had been alone. Now, she had James.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,079
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    216
  3. Tags
    Summary

    “006, you ought to know better than to sneak up on someone holding a gun.”

    “Gun parts.” 006 pointed out, “You have gun parts.”

    Before Q could rationally think his actions through, he had reassembled the gun and had it loaded in a blink. It was loaded, aimed and ready to fire– even taking the few centimetres it leaned to the left in account.

    “You seem to keep forgetting I am the one to have built the weapon you are here to return to TSS. Personally.”

    Q lowered the gun and dismantled it just as easily as he had before, laying out the pieces on a tray and picking it up. He had to push past 006 who was still standing in the doorway, his eyes following Q as he moved to carry the tray back to the main workshop area.

    “Well? What are you waiting for? I don’t have all night.” Q leaned on the workbench, peering at 006 sharply.

    A look of amusement broke through 006’s otherwise stern facade. “Marry me.”

    Pausing, Q blinked. “Did you just… Did you just proposition to your superior officer?”

    006 nodded, grinning brightly.

    “Drop your mission gear onto the workbench and get out of my Branch.” Q ordered, “Before I change my mind and shoot you.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,732
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    49
    Kudos:
    858
    Bookmarks:
    261
    Hits:
    7,004
  4. Tags
    Summary

    M married Bond for political reasons. Bond married M so he wouldn't have to bother to figure out his estate when he died.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,350
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    433
  5. Tags
    Summary

    After discovering he had fallen for a lie and that Madeleine Swann was never on his side, James Bond is called back into the field. He must stop an arms dealer bent on destroying the world! In Prague, he is paired with a CIA agent wanting to prove herself in the field. James soon falls into old habits but will he fall for the sexy CIA agent or will he discover her dark secret? Meanwhile Q ends up in a fake relationship with James. James soon discovers that he is in love with two different people, the MI6 Quartermaster and the CIA agent! Who will he choose? And what will happen when his secret daughter is revealed? Will Spectre destroy James Bond's chance at being happy?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,113
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    3,469
  6. Tags
    Summary

    After an unknown criminal organization blows up his flat and injures him in the process, Bond is packed off to recuperate at Q’s apartment against his will. At first, the two of them don't see eye to eye on their living arrangements (Bond would really like ONE morning when he’s not woken by a cat stepping on his face), but over time they come to realize that living together isn't as bad as it seems.

    A cozy slow burn with some real and figurative explosions thrown in.

    (currently not being updated)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,393
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Comments:
    87
    Kudos:
    125
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    3,745
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Bond arrives back in England battered and bruised after going MIA at the end of a dodgy mission. Q takes it upon himself to take care of the stubborn 'double-oh' agent. The following events take them on a journey neither of them was expecting.
    ---
    Takes place not long after the events of Skyfall. Lots of Bonds blatant flirting and lots of Q being awkward. This fic is 'banter' heavy and has elements of humour, chaos, angst and wit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,258
    Chapters:
    4/25
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    71
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2,045
  8. Tags
    Summary

    In a post- alternative No Time to Die universe, James Bond still reeling from Madeleine Swann's betrayal has met his match in Jayne, a young, brilliant, damaged CIA agent. James eventually falls for the beautiful Jayne after having a brief fling with Q and in an uncharacteristic move marries her. James and Jayne are no sooner back from their honeymoon, when they learn that their respected agencies are far from happy about their marriage and that they are grounded from all missions indefinitely. That makes matters worse when they realize that the mission, they met on is far from over. In a mission that leads them to Washington DC and Kazakhstan, both James and Jayne must confront their past and future. As the bodies and bombshells pile up, James struggles not to fall victim to past mistakes as he wrestles with the question, is Jayne the right girl for him? Or will she betray him like the others?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,215
    Chapters:
    19/19
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    32
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    2,541
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Our agent needs comfort..

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,933
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    438
  10. Tags
    Summary

    When James Bond has terrible horrible no good ways of coping so he takes a little stroll and figures out he's a dumbass.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,304
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    267
  11. Tags
    Summary

    James is alive and they have all the time in the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,634
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    2,186
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Inspired by the prompt "things you said that I wasn't meant to hear."

    "She’ll only understand what he means when it’s too late. Right now, though, the residual anger that lingers on her face compels him to stand up and get his coat."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,078
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    150
  13. Tags
    Summary

    James Bond along with Sebastian Ronson is one step closer to uncovering the secret organization behind Quantum and getting the hard drive in a mission that leads them from Zurich to Monte Carlo to Amsterdam. However, standing in their way are James' old enemy Mr. White and a beautiful heiress, with a connection to M that holds an important clue. As Bond and the heiress begin to connect, will he keep his promise to M? And has he finally met the love of his life? Wonder what James Bond was up to during the gap between Quantum of Solace and Skyfall and how he became involved in the opening events of Skyfall? Wonder no longer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,640
    Chapters:
    8/16
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1,470
  14. Tags
    Summary

    The tragic and deeply heartrending tale of James Bond's life aspirations getting crushed before his very eyes. To what depths will the Queen stoop to in order to torment our beloved 007?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,063
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    136
  15. Tags
    Summary

    '007 found himself retreating quite suddenly out of the research and development branch of MI6 upon almost bumping into his quartermaster for the third time that very week.'

    James Bond rather fancies his quartermaster and after Q inserts a new tracker, everything starts spilling out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,765
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    177
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    1,990
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Bond gets injured, Q gets sick. They both get some much-needed downtime.

    Sequel or companion to Indelible, but can probably be read on its own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,248
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    368
    Bookmarks:
    36
    Hits:
    5,137
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Мужчины за работой. ©

    Майкрофт напрягся до корней волос.
    - И что же это за чудесный план, после которого метафорическая гора свалится с наших плеч?
    - Смерть Джеймса Мориарти.

    Series
    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    9,546
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    19
    Hits:
    372
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Kitty Harte (Pussy Galore) always knew that Mr. Goldfinger was a racist homaphobic man. She had avoided the man until she met her partner Sky Moreson, a reporter for The New York Times. One morning Kitty got a message on her phone from her girlfriend saying she found something. That was the last time she heard from her. Now Kitty is going into the heart of Mr. Goldfinger’s New York Building to get her girlfriend back. Now if she could only get that stupid British spy to stop flirting with her.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,611
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    67
  19. Tags
    Summary

    They acted like they were something, or maybe just wanted to take more from each other while the other party was still willing to give and be patient before moving on. Not only their body warmth but mentally affection, James think, that was a warm feeling they were both anxious about, especially himself.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,616
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    218
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Not ten minutes after James and Tracy Bond's wedding concludes, it all comes crashing down on 007.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    592
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    240

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