Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

This is it.

He has waited twelve years for this day. For this very moment. The party of a lifetime, on his father’s private yacht. It’s big enough to be a small cruise ship, really. And with the number of guests present it certainly feels like a cruise.

The guest ranged from movie stars, to politicians, to media moguls and CEOs. People that influence the world’s economy, the world’s ideas, and every inch of society.

And maybe about ten of them are his age.

Eighteen.

He’s waited twelve years for his eighteenth birthday. His mother died on his sixth.

He still remembered sitting in the hospital room, holding her hand to the bitter end while she asked him to turn on the news, so she could at least hear his father’s voice. What a dismal birthday. Her heart stopped just after noon, and he sat at the hospital alone while his father was out giving speeches. He at least came to her funeral, but even back then he knew that was more of a photo op. Well maybe he didn’t know it was a political move, but he knew it was strange. All these men and women he’d never seen before, who’d never visited his mother in the hospital, who knew his name though he’d never met them were there. And all the cameras and reporters. After it was all done, he gave another speech, and made him stand by his side and hold his hand as he cried.

In spite of how strange it was, foolishly, he thought his father really missed her. He’d never seen him cry. So, he cried along with him while the cameras flashed, and they made the front page. The senator and his grieving son. What none of them captured was that his tears stopped right after the door to their car closed.

Only he kept crying.

And he cried for twelve years. No always visibly. Mostly alone. Mostly internally. He cried over how miserable he was. Over how cold his father was. He cried at every new boarding school. He sobbed after every fight about his future on the political stage. He wailed and clawed at himself each time he was isolated. He starved and cut himself every time he was told he was a disappointment. He stole alcohol from the pantry. He took pills from the medicine cabinets.  He took strange powder mixtures from the kids that stayed out late in the underground.

He did everything he could to ruin his life and to ruin his father’s image. It was the only way he knew how to cry any more.

But even all of that wasn’t enough.

He never relented. His fate was decided. He’d follow in his father’s footsteps come hell or high water. His father ‘cleaned up’ his act. Paid off teachers and police officers. Ran off friends and pushed him to hang out with the proper influences. He lived twelve years of crying and hating and finally it was all coming to an end.

Goro stood looking out the balcony window form his room on the boat. He was dressed head to toe in black, with only a few white stripes on his tie providing any color. He looked like he was going to a funeral, not his own birthday party.

He could hear the live stage band that was performing on the front deck of the ship, their music drifting through the night air. The wind carried the tune along with the voices of the party goers and the rhythmic sound of stomping feet from their dancing and the steady clinking of champagne glasses. The party over head was in full swing as the hour of midnight approached.

He was supposed to be up there to cut into the far to expensive cake right as the clock chimed. He was supposed to smile and take photos and shake hands and dance with his predetermined date.

But at midnight he didn’t plan to be on the boat anymore.

Goro turned away from his balcony and the image of the moon light reflecting off dark water to retrieve the only thing form his room he planned to take with him. On his nightstand there was a picture of his mother and him. She was sitting in her hospital bed, her hair removed and replaced with a colorful red and blue bandanna. He was sitting on the edge of her bed, half leaning over her lap while she held up a large strawberry cupcake with a big, black and white stripped number six candle on it.

He still remembered the taste of the frosting. It was a bit stiff but had a nice vanilla flavor to it. One of the nurses was kind enough to run to the bakery down the street and get it and the candle that morning. The doctors and a few of the patients that could leave their rooms came over to sing to him. His mother held the cupcake with shaking, bony hands and smiled while he made his wish.

When it was all over the nurse cut it in half and they shared it.

And a few hours later she went into cardiac arrest and was gone.

Goro ran his finger tips over her smiling face. He was certain that by now his hand had probably worn away a little dip in the glass from how often he did this. The version of him in the picture looked so happy. He wasn’t even sure he could smile like that anymore. In the back of his mind he made not to not look at his reflection in the glass, for he knew that if he did, he would see a face far removed from the little boy in the image. He’d see the makings of a face that made him feel vile and disgusted in his own existence.

Goro stood next to his bed holding the picture lost in thought until a knock came to his door. It jerked him out of his memories and made him frown, “I’ll be up in a minute.”

“You will not!” A female voice responded before the knocking resumed. “Open this door Shido Goro or face my wrath.”

“Oh, god…” He sighed and rolled his eyes before setting the picture down and walked over to the door. “Stop your knocking! I’m opening it.”

Goro unlocked his room door and before he could even turn the knob himself, it was twisting, and the door was swinging open. He had to jump back to avoid being hit.

On the other side of the door there was a young woman, his age with long dark brown hair and matching eyes. She was wearing a sea-foam party dress, with a skirt of shimmering silk and lace layered underneath and a grey sweater tied around her waist. She had on a pair of white high heels, and pearl accented jewelry for her accessories. In one hand she was carrying a small black wrapped, rectangular package.

“You take too long! I’m a very busy woman, and you are an atrocious party host!” She stormed in with a smile on her face and made her way over to the bed where she fell into a sitting position.

“Mika,” Goro shut the door to his room, “I am not hosting this party.”

“It’s a party for you. On your daddy’s fancy boat. You’re a host by default.” She crossed her legs before flashing him a big toothy smile. “Seriously though, are you going to leave me up there to deal with all these old farts by myself?”

Goro walked over to her and stood with his arms crossed, “I didn’t ask you to come.”

“You begged with your eyes.” Mika laughed. “Besides there’s only you, me, Hifumi, your fiancé and that Sugimura creep on this boat to talk to. And Hifumi and your fiancé are oddly attached at the hip…” Mika turned her head to the side and peered at Goro.

“Haru is gay.”

“Oh! So, you two do have something in common!” Mika clapped her hands together and nodded, “See and you didn’t want to get married.”

Goro rolled his eyes and Mika tossed the black package at him, “Speaking of gay, ‘Happy Birthday’!”

Goro fumbled to catch the gift and chuckled as he started to unwrap it, “Isn’t your gift for me up with the others?”

“That’s the gift your daddy-dear wants you to have. This is the gift you deserve.” Mika leaned back on the palms of her hands and watched Goro open the package.

He unwrapped it slowly, first seeing the edges of a frame, followed by the glass cover of a picture, and the start of someone’s silver hair. Goro kept unwrapping with a confused look until he could get a good look at the picture and laugh. The picture was a signed, shirtless, autograph of a man with bowl cut silver hair, grey eyes, hold a Red Hawk Featherman helmet under his left arm and burning blade in the other.

It was signed ‘To my number one fan, Go-chan. From SS.’

“Mika! What the hell!?” Goro tilted his head back and laughed. But he pressed the picture to his chest, “Where did you get this!?”

“I was doing a photoshoot! And who should be there but Featherman War Cry’s own Red Hawk, Souji Seta! I told him my best girlfriend in the world was a huge fan! And that her birthday was coming up… He was there for some swimsuit thing taking place after my shoot.” Mika put a hand to her chest and lightly shook her head, “I politely begged and used all my charm for a picture. I’ll have you know I had to run to the nearest convince store and grab those Red Hawk props!”

Goro pulled the picture back and looked down at the image, “He looks… Great.” He sighed, “But who’s ‘Go-chan’?”

“Well I couldn’t use your actual name! Do you think he’d do it if I told him it was for a guy!”

“He might have,” Goro shrugged.

“For someone who’s supposedly really smart, you’re really stupid.” Mika rolled her eyes. She got to her feet and spread her arms open with a sigh before smiling again. “Happy Birthday, Goro.”

“Ha,” Goro leaned forward and returned the hug. It felt awkward. It always did when he hugged Mika.

They’d met years ago at a party that her manager got her into because it would be good for her image. And they bonded over fake smiles and supervised glasses of wine.

He then met her again a week later at a party her manager would have lost his mind over if he knew she was there, and they bonded over catty remarks and too many unsupervised cans of beer.

Talking to Mika was fun, but there was always a sense they were both acting. He didn’t dislike her, and he could tell she didn’t dislike him, but really at the end of the day he didn’t really know what she was like. And he wagered she didn’t really know what he was like either.

She at least knew enough to know he had no interest in his arranged marriage. And had seen him at enough parties getting his dick sucked to know he was gay. Goro was certain at least one of those hook ups was Mika’s boyfriend at the time, but that was besides the point…

They pulled back from the hug just as another knock came to the door. Goro hadn’t locked it this time so the knock was instantly followed by the knob turning. He scrambled to reach around Mika and shove the picture under his pillow while she stepped to the side and did her best to put on the most unassuming appearance she could.

The door swung open and Goro’s father stepped into the doorway. The moment their eyes met any good feeling that had existed in the room since Mika’s arrival flew out the window.

Goro couldn’t stand the sight of him. His father’s bald head, his trimmed, thin beard, and eyes Goro could only describe as ‘beady’ hidden behind orange shades. He was wearing his usual black blazer with a white shirt, and dress pants.

“What are you doing still in your room?” He walked into the room a frown on his face.

“It’s my party, I’ll spend it where I want to.” Goro immediately snapped back.

Shido turned to Mika with a slight frown and expectant glare. Her face lit up for a moment before she looked back and forth at Goro and the door, “I’ll see you up on deck, Goro!” She turned quickly on her heels and rushed around Shido.

As she started out the door she turned back and mouthed a ‘Good Luck’ to him.

Once the door was closed, Shido started talking again, “Here in your room with a woman unattended. You know your fiancé and her father on this boat. Are you trying to make a scene? Again?”

Goro rolled his eyes, “Who cares? Would anyone really say anything? You cheated on Mom all the time.” He threw his hands up in the air, “Haru will get over.” Goro already knew Haru didn’t care. They only spent time together to please their fathers. Haru confessed to Goro first that she wasn’t really into men; she was just grateful her father broke up her previous arrangement to pair her with Goro, as he seemed nicer than Sugimura.

That much he could agree with, he was at least better than that walking dumpster fire. Sugimura was so ill tempered and such a bastard that sometimes Goro wondered if his mother had been one of Shido’s affairs and he was his brother. He certainly had the same disposition as Shido.

“Don’t get flippant with me,” Shido reached out and grabbed Goro’s wrist. He immediately tried to pull back only to have his chin grabbed by his father’s other hand. “Okumura has contributed greatly to my previous campaign and my reelection campaign. Not to mention the stock I hold in his company is worth several fortunes. No one might say anything publicly, but I have more money tied up in you marrying his daughter than you can imagine. So, get your act together, and at least have the common sense not to fuck around with her father on the boat!”

Shido let him go by giving Goro a hard shove so that he fell back onto the bed. Goro tumbled back and landed ass first on the pillows, and he heard a faint crack underneath him. He bit his bottom lip and looked down for a moment before glaring up at Shido.

“But you admit I can fuck around! You don’t care what kind of person I am, just so long as your image isn’t tarnished by me!”

“Of that’s all that matters. I run this country. How would it look if I can’t control my own brat? You turn eighteen in a matter of minutes. So, your behavioral problems are going to come to a stop. If you want to play, learn to do it behind the scenes like any self-respecting politician.”

“I don’t want to be a politician!”

“No one asked about what you want. You’ll do what’s required, and that’s that.”

Goro felt a lump form in his throat, “Do what’s required… Is that what you told Mom when she married you?”

“I told your mother I expected obedience from her. And she was happy to oblige. She was happy with our arrangement. If you’d learn to behave you could be happy as well.” Shido pointed at him, “But if you continue to act out of line, I can make you just a miserable as you are trying to make me.”

Goro looked down and grumbled, “You already do.”

Shido smirked at Goro’s comment. He didn’t answer, but he looked proud at knowing his son was unhappy. He turned from him and approached the door before speaking again, “Be sure to leave your misery in here. There are reporters on deck, and I expect a happy picture of you and Okumura to be the headline of every news outlet, do you understand?”

“Yes, Sir…” Goro let his head hang until he heard the door shut.

The moment he was alone he got up and grabbed his pillow before hurling it at the door with a scream.

He dragged his hands over his face and closed his eyes to think for a moment before looking back at the bed.

On the mattress he saw the picture Mika had given him, the glass was cracked and had cut into Souji’s perfect abs. He reached down and grabbed the picture by the frame before picking up a few pieces of the broken glass. It wasn’t an expensive gift, and he wasn’t even completely sure if it was sincere… but the fact that it was broken made his anger grow. He turned, frustrated and chucked it at the wall.

The frame cracked, and the rest of the glass shattered out onto the floor as it fell. Where it struck the wall, a dent formed.

Goro stared down at the broken image and felt himself gasping for air. Tears slowly started to roll down his cheeks. He walked around the bed, the broken glass cracking under his dress shoes, and grabbed the picture of his mother.

Twelve years.

Goro stroked her image as tear drops fell against the picture frame.

He could see his reflection staring up at him, and in turn found himself picking out the jaw line and face structure of his father. He hated how much he looked like him. Hated how much he had to see Shido even in his own reflection when he desperately just wanted to see his mother.

But he was going to see her soon.

Goro walked back around his room and locked the door. He then grabbed his dresser and pushed it against the door before returning to the balcony.

Outside the night air was blowing with a steady chill again. And he could hear the band shifting its music to a celebratory tune. He turned and sat on the balcony’s bars with his back to the ocean and his mother’s picture pressed to his chest.

The wind whipped up and caused his hair to blow around his face as he heard the guest start to sing a birthday song, and the clock set up on the boat’s deck started to chime down to midnight. A frantic knock came at his door as a servant tried to get him to open so they could rush him up to the party. Of course, Shido would not return a second time.

Goro smiled as he felt his bottom lip tremble and the saliva build up in the back of his mouth.

He was going to give himself the best birthday present ever. And the biggest fuck you to his father he could manage.

At the final chime of midnight Goro tilted his body back and fell off the balcony. He felt the night air rush past him, and heard the guest cheering drunkenly overhead. They had no idea, nor did they even care that he wasn’t present.

His hands tightened around the picture of his mother just as his eyes fixed on the moon over head. And in the next moment his back collided with the cold ocean waves.

Immediately all the air was knocked from his lungs by the impact. The cold water coiled around his body, and ever muscle in him tightened up in shock. He closed his eyes and kept his mouth shut. Instinctively he didn’t breathe, but he had to fight the urge to start moving his arms. His brain was telling him to kick his legs, to move his arms. To let his mother go, and start trying to swim.

But he refused.

He pulled his body together, letting his weight drag him down like a rock. There was a faint bit of moonlight breaking through the surface of the ocean, and his eyelids, but he knew that soon everything would be dark. His lungs were burning for air and his brains messages to try and save himself were become more and more disjointed.

Thoughts of vanilla frosting and strawberry cake crumbs flooded back to him between orders to kick his legs.

Images of flashing cameras filtered in between the moonlight and the growing darkness of his subconscious.

Long brown wavy hair framing a content and loving smile, was replaced with a withered and tired look, and red and blue cloth as the coldness of the ocean began to rob him of his sense of feeling.

Goro could almost see her, he was certain. He felt himself fading away, ready to join her when something pulled him back.

Something bumped into him in the ocean.

Something big.

For a moment his mind panicked thinking it was a shark. Not that he was opposed to it eating him, but he really didn’t want to feel its teeth in his final moments. He tried to kick it away, only for his feet to flail about in the water.

He thought perhaps he was wrong and it was just a wayward fish, until he felt something again.

This time hands.

Hands.

And they were grabbing at the picture he so desperately clung to. He felt fingers with sharp nails grabbing at his hands and arms and pulling. Goro immediately resisted. Though he didn’t have much air left in his lungs to do so, he still tried. He was going to die with his mother. He didn’t know who was trying to separate them, but they would fail!

His body rolled over in the ocean and he tried to blindly kick and swim away.

But the person pulling at him would not give up. They let Goro roll over but now grabbed at his shoulders and were trying to drag him upward.

Had someone jumped in after him?

Goro struggled, shaking his body back and forth. He had to take one hand off the photo to push at the person, but his hand swung around in the water and only connected with scales. He felt a cold body, and found himself running his palm along long scaly skin.

The lack of air to his brain must have been confusing him.

However, he soon felt his head break above the ocean waves and without thinking he gasped for air.

“No!” He started to cough and scream. He opened his eyes and struggled to look around and see who had grabbed him. But the saltwater running down his face, and waves lapping up to obscure his view made it hard. He could barely see the lights of his father’s boat off in the distance, and the moon reflecting off the waves.

He kept his mother’s photo in one hand as someone supported him from behind, their hands holding him up under his arms.

“Let go!” Goro screamed as he frantically tried to free himself. “Let me go!”

“You must swim!” A boy’s voice shouted at him. “Let go of that thing!”

“Thing!?” Goro kept trying to see who was behind him, but every time he turned his head the person leaned to the opposite side. He could just barely catch glimpses of red and black moving behind him. But he could feel their nails digging into his armpits as they held him up. They were holding them both up. Whoever it was had a lot of strength.

“The thing in your hands! Let it go! Swim!”

“No!” Goro felt his fingers clutch the frame tighter. Even though the water was cold, and his grip was weak, he was never going to let his mother go. “Let me drown!”

“You need to swim!” The boy behind him shouted. Goro heard a splash behind him and turned his head to the left. He couldn’t completely process what he was seeing, a large red fish tail came up from the water, he could hardly make out the black accent scales streaked along the sides, and the bony extensions coming off the large horizontal fin before it collided with his arm.

He shouted as pain stung through his arm and his hand let go of the picture. It started to slowly sink into the water.

“Now swim!”

“Mother!” Goro started flailing his arms and the boy let go. He did not, however, swim for the boat. Instead, Goro dove his head underwater and started trying to swim after his mother’s picture. He could barely see in the darkened waves. He was reaching out frantically scrambling around reaching for her, trying to reunite with her.

Behind he felt hands grabbing at his legs, and he kicked viciously at his would-be rescuer.

He just wanted to drown. He just wanted to be with his mother.

Goro’s lungs were soon burning again. His hands reached anxiously as he pushed his body and swung his arms with all his might. Time and time again he was met with darkness until his fingers brushed against something.

Eagerly Goro pushed himself one last time as he felt glass slide over his fingertips. He couldn’t see it in the darkness of the waves, but he felt it. He knew it in his heart he was brushing up against her smile again.

And then his ankles were grabbed, and he was yanked back.

He was pulled back with a force faster and stronger than he was, and he screamed. He opened his mouth into the ocean water and screamed. The air rushed form his lungs and sea water flooded in to replace it and fill his gut. All his senses were overwhelmed by the cold and the salt and his anger and sadness. He thrashed pathetically as he ran out air and energy.

Goro felt himself giving up.

He felt everything slipping away. His air, his willpower, only his memory of a loving smile and vanilla frosting remained.

He even felt it on his lips.

That sweet vanilla bean taste. In the darkness of the ocean it was warm.

A pair of soft, but textured lips against his that strangely reminded him of vanilla frosting on a strawberry cupcake, with a hint of salt.

Goro found himself focusing on a pair of gold eyes watching him with intent determination, as the flow of sea water into his body was halted by another’s mouth over his own. But he was exhausted. He just wanted to drift down into the ocean.

He closed his eyes and sighed as the dark waves of the ocean pulled him and his would-be savior down.

Chapter Text

“Do you like it?”

Goro felt his mother gently tracing his fingers over his arms. Her nails had to be clipped while in the hospital; the skin on her fingertips was soft to the touch. She had only picked at her half of the cupcake and spent most of the time watching him eat.

Outside a seagull cried out.

“Yes! It’s strawberry flavored!” Goro used his fingers to pick up the crumbs on his little paper plate and licked them off his fingers. He looked up at his mother’s face and watched her smile. Her eye lids were only half open, but she looked happy. The light coming in from the window next to her bed seemed to make her face shine like the sun.

Just looking at her made him feel warm.

“It’s too bad your father couldn’t make it…”

Goro stopped licking his fingers, and let them hang in his mouth. He didn’t care that his father couldn’t come.

Over his ankles a wave crashed and soaked his feet.

“Maybe we can turn on the TV and catch his speech. I’m sure he’ll wish you happy birthday on the television…”

Goro watched her reach out to grab the little remote tucked beside her on the bed. As she pulled it up Goro’s hand ripped from his lips and grabbed her wrist.

“No! No! I don’t want to see him!”

“Goro!” She tried to pull away.

“I hate him!” He held onto her wrist. “I hate him! I hate him! I don’t want him here! I just want it to be us!”

“Goro, let go!” She tried to pull away.

“No! It’s just us, just us only!”

“Goro! I said let go!” His mother pulled her arm back from him, and the moment they came apart something grabbed Goro by his legs. He let out a scream and reached out for her. But he was quickly dragged down into the floor, into the dark ocean.

His mother remained on her bed, looking over the side at him. The light shining behind her as she drifted further and further away. He clawed out trying to get to her.

And instead found his fingers digging into hot sand.

Goro’s head jerked up and he let out a startled gasp. He scrambled, half asleep and clawed forward with his hands; He dragged himself a foot before he stopped and tried to catch his breath. Something was on him, sticking to the lower half of his body.

He rolled over and found a few palm fawns tossed over his lower half. A few feet away was the ocean. He was lying on a beach.

Goro’s chest heaved as he tried to reason with himself about what had happened.

“I… I fell off the boat.” He slowly looked around in awe. “I fell and… Someone tried to get me?” Goro licked his lips, a decision he immediately regret as he licked sand off his lips. He spit a few times, thinking about how gross the sand tasted. Nothing like the cupcake in his dream.

“…Mom!” Goro’s head snapped up and he looked around frantically for his picture. He kicked off the palm leaves and started to look around the beach. “MOM!” He called out, even if it was just for an object. He wanted it. He needed it.

Another couple of feet up the beach Goro could see another stack of two palm leaves. They had a few rocks placed on their ends and a seagull was pecking viciously at them. He rushed over to it, causing the bird to fly away. Goro grabbed the rocks and shoved them aside in a hurry. He then tossed away the leaves hoping to find his mother’s image underneath but instead he found a few eels and one salmon.

He stared at the pile dumb struck until he felt a knot settle in the pit of his stomach. He grabbed one of the eels and angrily tossed it screaming down the beach. The seagull descended upon it and started to feast. Goro cursed and grabbed the rest of the fish and tossed them angrily at the ocean. Once he was out of fish, he picked up the rocks and threw them too. Then he started to kick at the sand, and kick at the waves. He couldn’t stop screaming.

“Why!?” He screamed out at the empty sky and sea. “W-hy!!?”

Goro tilted his head back and looked up at the sky over head. The sun was shining and there were no clouds. In any other case this would have been a beautiful day. He felt his body fall back and he landed in a sitting position in the sand. He pulled his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his knees before putting his head down.

“…Why?” Goro closed his eyes. He could feel tears catching on the edges of his eye lashes.

Somehow, he’d survived his fall into the ocean. But he survived it alone.

Goro sat still on the edge of the beach; the ocean waves steadily rolled in and out, and the seagull occasionally called out into the open air. Every now and again the wind caused the palm trees behind him to rustle and his hair to tickle at the back of his neck.

But he didn’t move. He sat still letting the sun beat down on him. His all black outfit clung to him as he sweat, and the sea air stuck to his skin.

Someone had put him here, hadn’t they?

Goro slowly lifted his head and blinked a few times as he scanned the beach.

He was covered up by leaves to protect him from the sun. And those fish had been covered up to protect them from gulls.

Goro turned around to stare at the land behind him. Up the beach he saw a few trees here and there among some shrubs. Further back he could see a thicker mass of trees, and plant life and a few large rocks. Someone else had to be here with him.

He got to his feet and approached the edge of the where the plants were growing.

“Hello!?” Goro called out, but no one answered. “Hey! Where did you go!?”

He stood still and listened.

From behind he heard a loud splash in the ocean. But when he turned his head around, he didn’t see anything. He glanced up and down the beach before walking forward into the brush. As he explored, he continued to callout, hoping that whoever had grabbed him would answer soon.

It took him about a half hour to explore the area. He’d been dragged up onto an island, that for all he could tell was uninhabited. He searched it form end to end; he guessed from what he saw that the island was a crescent shape. The middle part was covered with plants and palms; he’d woken up on the east side of the island, the west side had no beach. There were just rocks with plants hanging out over a shallow area of water he could wade out into before it dropped off into the ocean proper. On the north end he could see another island and make out a trail of plants and trees marking a shallow spot in the land connecting the two. However right now the land was underwater. It more than likely was more visible when the tide came down.

But as much as he looked, he couldn’t find another person.

“I know someone grabbed me… They couldn’t have gone far.” Goro leaned under one of the many trees lining the beach. Walking around in all black was quickly tiring him out. He unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off to drape it over his shoulder. He then knelt down to roll up his pants to his knees and remove his shoes.

Once he made himself a bit more comfortable he walked back to the area where he’d woken up, and to his surprise he saw the set up of the palm leaves covered with rocks had been restored.

Goro stopped in his tracks and looked around. No one had answered his calls earlier.

“Hello!?” He ran towards the set up and looked around. No one was there. And there were no footprints. He could just see a long impression in the sand coming from the water, it made a U-turn at the new pile and returned down to the ocean.

He turned his head to look out over the water and peered curiously.

He didn’t see anyone on a boat, or a raft. Just water. Water for miles.

Goro lifted the rocks and found a new set of fish, different from what he tossed out earlier along with a drawing in the sand. The drawing showed what looked like a crescent moon and then a full one with a few dots between them. The full moon had a little circle dug out of it and some water in the middle.

He stared at it confused and looked around.

“What is this supposed to mean?”

Over head the seagull cried out again. Goro looked up to see it circling with a few friends now. He looked back down at the fish and grabbed them before wrapping them up in the leaves. If he was going to be stuck here, he was going to need to eat.

But he would need a fire to cook and water to survive.

Goro looked back down at the drawing in the sand.

“Water in the middle. It’s a map of the islands!” He looked around. “Someone is here! Hey!” He called out angrily. “Where are you!?” Goro shouted out into the area but no one called back. He sighed just as one of the sea gulls over head dove down towards the ocean behind him. However, the bird let out a loud cry and Goro heard a violent splash behind him.

He turned around just in time to see the bird flailing in the water like it had crashed. Just under the surface of the water he saw a few bubbles and shadow dart away.

“God damn birds can’t even hunt… No. wonder you want my fish.” He combed his fingers through his hair and nodded. “Alright… Time to head to the other side I guess.”

Goro made his way to the north end of the island and studied the layout of the shrubs and trees growing up from the water. He’d wrapped the fish and his shoes up in his shirt into a neat little bundle to carry.

“Alright, if I just, hug the plants it should be fine…” He held his bundle of fish tight under one arm and used his other to keep balance as he waded out into the water.

He found footing in soft sand just under the waves, and every few feet there was a plant he could latch onto while he poked around with his toes to make sure he wasn’t stepping off into the ocean. The process was slow, but he did make it across the little submerged land bridge to the next island. Unlike the pervious one there was no beach. The plants came all the way down to the water’s edge, and there were rocks jutting up here and there along the edge of the island.

He had to be careful not to cut himself or fall as he made his way up until his feet found solid land. He couldn’t tell if this island was bigger, but it felt denser than the one with the beach. There were certainly more plants to push out of his way and move aside as he explored, and the trees grew more clustered together to block out more of the sun.

Goro didn’t bother to call out for anyone, at this point he was convinced they weren’t going to answer. So, he made his way through the dense cluster of trees and plants and vines until they gave way to a section of the island that dipped down. Nearly right in the center, just as the crude map had shown him there was a pool of water. Goro scanned the area, but there were still no signs of anyone.

He circled the pool and studied it. He couldn’t see the bottom, so that was unnerving. But there were a few places where flat rocks stretched into the water. He could use those to sit safely on the edge. And there was at least one tree growing out over the water.

Goro placed his bundle down in a safe location away from the water’s edge before kneeling near the shore of the pool.

“Okay, let’s see…” He put his hands together and scooped up some of the water before bringing it to his lips. He held the water on his tongue for a moment before swallowing. “Well it’s not salty. So, there’s that… But…” He dumped the rest of the water and shook his hands. “I can drink this and probably die of parasites… Nothing to boil it in. No fire to cook with.”

He rubbed his face and leaned back to look up at what he could see of the sky between the trees.

“I wonder if someone will find me? That would mean going back home… Maybe I should just try again?” Goro continued to look up at the sky. He thought about what to. If he stayed, the chance that he would die was very likely. He could try again to definitively kill himself… But he knew whoever dragged him out of the ocean was close by.

But where were they? This place wasn’t that big. Even if they had been on this island while he was on the other, there’s only one way to travel between them unless you swim around…

“And that would require too much effort… I guess I should wait until they show themselves, and then plan from there.”

Goro moved back to a safe distance from the edge of the pool and began looking around for a good place to set up camp while he waited for his savior to show themselves. He managed to find an area not far from the pool of fresh water where he could start clearing around plants. He broke branches and dug up small shrubs with his bare hands to make a clear patch of dirt. Halfway through he was grateful he took off his shirt, because his hands and arms were covered in dirt and sweat.

He survived the area pleased with himself. He dug out a clear area between two palms big enough for him to sit down and possible start a fire.

“A fire…” He looked over the pile of small plants and limbs he’d removed and figured he could start stripping them of leaves to make a fire. “But I need something to start one with?”

He looked around and began scouring around for any small rocks.

“Maybe I can I create a spark… Or maybe that’s just movie bullshit?”

Either way he figured it was worth a try.

Goro found as many rocks as he could and washed the dirt off them. He then took a few of the smaller limbs and removed the leaves from them before making them into a small pile. He went to work trying to use the twigs and rocks to spark a flame. A process that took him probably over an hour, but after several attempts, a few splinters, and a few times he banged up his fingers he finally got a spark going.

Goro blew on the tiny spark and fed it twigs and dried brush until he felt it confident it would keep burning on his own. He leaned back and sighed. His palms were practically raw from all the effort.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had to work this hard…” He laughed and tilted his head back. The sunlight was strong as before, so it had to be approaching late afternoon. “Still no sign of this other person.” He turned his head to his wrapped-up bundle of food, “I didn’t imagine them.”

Goro pulled the bundle over to the fire and unwrapped it. “This is going to taste terrible…”

He used some of the leftover stripped limbs to skewer the fish and prop them up over the fire. He let them cook until they were blackened and then ate. It wasn’t great, but it was something. He spent a lot of the time spitting out scales and bits of little bone and hoping he wasn’t biting into something he was going to regret.

By the time he finished eating the sky overhead was turning orange.

Goro contemplated exploring for the other person again, but figured he’d better spend his time getting more limbs for his fire. Surely whoever was here with him would have to come to the fire once night fell right?

Nope.

Even after the sun set, and Goro had built up his fire to ensure it would burn through the night, no one came.

Maybe they didn’t want to be seen? But why not? They were both stranded out here together, weren’t they? What were they eating? And how were they avoiding him?

Goro wrapped his shirt up into a ball to use as a pillow and laid down facing his fire. He supposed he had nothing else to do now but wait. Maybe in the morning he’d make a second fire down on the beach. He could make a torch and carry the flame across the land bridge, that would be easier than making a new fire. But then what? Hope that someone sees the smoke and comes to get him?

Just to go back to society and his shit-hole of a life and father?

He closed his eyes.

“I don’t want to go back…”

Goro tried to settle into a comfortable position so he could go to sleep. He at least had the fire to keep him warm but sleeping on the bare dirt wasn’t great. Maybe he should have made a bed out of palm leaves? He could do that tomorrow. If he could manage to rest. His mind kept drifting around about what he should do about his situation. Should he try to get help? Did he want help? He still had to find something so he could drink that water. But until then maybe he could pick form fruit from the trees for their juice?

His mind kept wandering and wandering until it found something to focus on… A tune off in the distance.

He could hear a faint humming.

Goro opened his eyes and rolled over.

Someone was humming a little tune. Every now and again he thought he heard words mixed in, though he didn’t know what they were. It sounded like the voice of a boy.

“It was a guy that rescued me last night…” Goro sat up and strained to listen. The noise sounded like it was coming from the east side of the island. He sat up and grabbed a branch to shove into the fire. He waited until it lit up before standing and walking away from his fire towards the sound. The closer he got to the edge of the land the louder it became.

Goro pushed his way through the forested area, however just as the water came into view the sound stopped.

“….Hello?” He turned around confused. “Is someone there?” The only response to his question was a faint splashing in the water. Goro continued forward to the edge of the island and held his torch up to illuminate the water. “Hey! Are you out there?”

No one responded.

“…What the hell?” Goro stood on the edge of the island looking for a few minutes more before he made his way back to his camp. The singing didn’t return.

The next day Goro decided he would set about setting up a signal fire. If worst came to worst, and he was rescued, he could at least do himself in on land quick and easy. He crossed back over to the island with the beach and found a new set of fish waiting for him. He didn’t bother to look around for anyone but set about gathering branches and bush limbs for a big fire on the beach. Once he had the pile made, he went back and got a torch to light it up.

He then started searching the island’s trees to see what ones had fruit. He found some with coconuts and spent the better part of the early afternoon climbing them to knock a few down.

By then he was hungry, so Goro opted to roast his fish at his new fire and break open one of his coconuts to drink from with a rock. While he ate, he stared out aimlessly at the water as he waited.

After he finished eating, he considered thinking about making a log somewhere of how many days he was here. So far, he was onto two.

“Father probably has a search party out looking for me…” glanced up at the smoke rising up from the fire. “So maybe someone will see that… Or maybe he’ll just assume I’m dead and move on.”

Goro sighed, “Mom, I wish you had made it here too.”

After he finished eating, Goro gathered up the large leaves that had been previously used to cover up his fish, and himself and laid them out in the shade at the edge of the forest line. He then laid down with nothing else to do and let himself drift off to sleep.

He slept surprisingly sound until the sound of someone singing woke him up.

Goro opened his eyes to see the sun had gone down. His new fire was still burning strong- he had built up a massive pile of shrubs to keep it going. He rubbed his eyes and groaned as he sat up.

“Singing? Again?” Goro looked around. The voice was once again coming out from the ocean. He got up and stumbled a bit as he approached his fire.

Just as he stepped into the light the singing stopped.

“Oh come on… Who’s there!?” He walked past the fire and stood at the edge of the shore. His eye scanned the waves back and forth until he saw something move.

Just out beyond his fire’s light he saw something pop up form the water. And he was sure that whoever it was saw him staring at them, because the shadowy figure hesitated for a moment before submerging again.

“HEY!” He wades out into the water until it was up to his knees, “HEY! COME BACK HERE! WHO ARE YOU??”

Goro stopped and scanned the waves again. They had to come back up. They couldn’t stay under the water forever.

Yet, for as long as he stood there, he never saw the figure come back up from the water.

Eventually he gave up and made his way back up to the shore. Goro grabbed his leaves, wrapping them up into a neat roll, and a torch before making his way back to his camp.

His first fire was burning low now. He reignited it and laid out his leaves before sitting down.

“Someone is here…” He took a deep breath and looked around.  However, they were avoiding him. And as crazy as it sounded, they were doing so by swimming around the island while he was walking on it. “So, when I’m on one end they swim to the other… That has to be it.”

The idea that the other person on the island was avoiding him made him nervous. Why did they not want to be seen? And how were they surviving?

it seemed they were only interested in making themselves known at night… Or at least that was the only time they were comfortable with letting their guard down.

“Then tomorrow night… I’m going to get them to show themselves. They dragged me up into this island before. I’m certain they’ll do it again.”

Chapter Text

Day three.

Goro had taken to carving out notches in one of the trees around his camp.

It had only been three days, but he already felt miserable. He caved that morning on trying to find something to boil is water in and had another handful from the pool. But after he promised himself, he was going to just drink the water from the coconuts until he could think of something… Or talk to the other occupant on the island.

He knew they were still around as more fish had been left on the beach.

He gathered it up and cooked it before exploring the island again trying to figure out where this other person hid themselves. He started with the western end of the island, since that seemed to be where he’d caught glimpses of them the most.

“…But they’re always out in the water…” Goro stood on the edge of the beach tossing small rocks and shells into the ocean. “But I do spend all my time on the northern island. Maybe they’re hiding on the southern end.”

He stopped tossing rocks and started down the beach.

Three days in and his skin was starting to tan. He was going to get such an awful sunburn. And worse yet the tan highlighted old wounds, where his cuts had created slightly discolored lines along his arms. There were a few more on his back, but he didn’t cause those.

Goro made his way down the beach; the sand slowly started to taper off and merge into the plants that covered the rest of the land. By the time he reached the southern edge he was wading his way through short grass and peaking over fledging palm trees. It didn’t really look like there was anyone hiding out down here, except Goro noted that a few of the young trees closest to the water had broken stems on top. Evidence of leaves that had been snapped off.

“This must be where they’re getting the leaves from.” Goro traced his fingertips over the snapped branches. “These breaks aren’t clean, so they didn’t use a knife or any sort of tool…”

He turned his attention out over the water. He could see white sand just under the water stretching several feet out. The sand was dotted with colorful shells, small crustaceans, a little fish swimming about. The sun light reflected off the water’s surface and reminded him of the kind of scene he’d see on a vacation brochure.

“It really is a pretty place… If I wasn’t stuck here, I might enjoy it.” With no place else to go, Goro started walking forward out into the shallows. He kept scanning the area, hoping to catch sight of someone else, maybe out scrounging around in the water. He even glanced back to see if anyone had come up onto the shore behind him, but he saw nothing.

Finally Goro stopped once he was a few feet out into the water and shouted, “Hello!!”

No one answered. He grumbled and stared out at the ocean. They’d dragged him back up to the island before.

He tilted his head back and shouted again, “If you don’t answer me! I’m just going to swim for it!!”

When he heard nothing, Goro nodded to himself.

“Alright then, here I go…” Goro clenched his jaw before running toward the end of the shallows. It was a bit clumsy, the water slowed down his movements, and the further out he went, the higher it was getting. By the time the waves were up to his waist he was struggling to move forward.

It was at that point that he started to swim. He pushed off the ground and hastily started paddling and kicking to push himself out into the deeper water.

Goro’s arms and legs carried him out past the clear waves into the murky ocean, the island slowly left behind him. It wasn’t until he started to feel confident that he might be allowed to swim out to his death that he heard a splashing sound behind him. Someone was following him.

He stopped swimming and started treading water as he looked around.

The island was far away now. The ocean tide was easily pushing him back from the land as it rolled away from the island’s edge. But he didn’t see anyone. Goro twisted in the water and started swimming again.

And again, he heard something behind him. But he didn’t stop moving forward as he glanced back. He didn’t see a person, but he was certain he saw a shadow under the water.

“Oh, good!” Goro felt his heart race. Rather than a person he attracted some sort of large ocean fish. He could only hope it wasn’t carnivorous. He tried to swim faster, but the shadow just caught up to him and then disappeared further under the water.

He was sure that he caught a faint glimpse of red coloration as it dove under him.

Goro stopped swimming and started treading again.

He was now so far out he could just see the tops of the trees from the island. His arms were tired, and his body was burning with exhaustion.

He could easily swim just a bit more and be too tired to make it back. He’d sink to the bottom. That would be wonderful…

But he wouldn’t get the chance.

Under the water something started pushing him from behind. Goro let out a yelp as he was certain he felt hands against his lower back shoving him back the direction of the island. Immediately he started to swing his arms and kick to shake it off.

“What? What the hell?” He slammed his fist into the water hoping to hit whatever it was, and in response a big red tail splashed up out of the water. He recognized it for the same one he saw the night he fell off his father’s yacht. The fin was almost two feet in length, and fanned out with bony spines that helped it spread open and retract as it slammed into the water and flooded his vision with seawater.

Goro turned his head away and started to cough and rub his eyes. His body bobbed in the water and for a moment his head went under as he stopped moving.

Just as he went under arms wrapped around his middle and pushed him upward, so his head stayed above the surface.

He started screaming between his coughs and reached under the waves to try and pry the arms off of him. The more he tried the more he felt sharp nails digging into his middle. The person supporting him started swimming back towards the island at a pace faster than he could manage.

“Stop! Stop! I don’t want to go back!” Goro tried kicking and twisting his body, thinking maybe he could turn to face them, but he had no such luck.

All he could mange to see under the water behind him was something red and black, and occasionally see that large red tail coming up from the water and a pair of black dorsal fins cutting through the water’s surface. They were attached to a red and black fish.

That was pushing him?

The fish was pushing him back to the island.

The lack of water was distorting his thoughts.

Goro continued to scream until he felt his toes dragging along on the sand. He’d been brought all the way back to the shore and he was furious. He was pushed down once the water was shallow enough for him to kneel and finally, the arms let him go.

He stumbled a bit as he scrambled to turn around and shout at the person that had brought him back, but instead he was met with the back end of a large retreating fish. Without thinking Goro reached out to grab the base of its tail. He flailed forward and his hand slid along the scaled body until he managed to wrap his fist around the area where the fin’s connected to the body proper.

Immediately the fish started to thrash.

It’s dorsal fins stood ridged out of the water as the creature whipped its tail back and forth, and dragged Goro along.

He started screaming for it to stop, but refused to let go. He could see the fish was long, it’s body as big as his, maybe bigger. It was mostly red, but had black streaks on its tail, and the fins on its back and sides were black. The front half of it was moving erratically as it tried to shake him off. He was almost confused into thinking it had arms?

Arms that were clawing at the sand as it started spinning around in circles under the water. The entire process was disorienting. Goro had to close his eyes to keep from throwing up. But his grip was slipping. A few more shakes and twist in the water and he was forced to let go.

Goro was flung back and landed with a splash. He landed face down in the water with the upper half of his body floating, and his legs dragging in the sand. He held his breath and didn’t move, gambling that if he stopped moving, whatever had pushed him back to the island would come investigate.

And he was right. He heard something swimming towards him, but what he didn’t expect was to hear it speak.

“…Oh… Oh no! Oh no, I hurt him!” Goro felt a hand on his back and one on his stomach. The other person started to roll him over and he closed his eyes while they did so. “Oh gosh… Is he breathing?” He felt fingers poking at his face and a hand against his chest. He recognized the voice as the same one that had told him to swim two nights ago.

This was the boy that brought him here. He slowly opened his eyes to peek. Goro wasn’t sure what he was expecting to see, but he wasn’t expecting this.

The person in question looked strange… A mass of short, wet, black hair tangled with a few tiny errand seashells, and golden eyes. His skin had a reddish coloration to it, lighter than the deep red of the fish tail his upper half was attached to. Along his skin there were patches of black scales clustered together where black fins grew out of his arms; the scales covered the sides of his torso where the slits for gills were rapidly fanning open and close. And some even trailed up his neck and over his chin.

Goro’s eyes opened wider as he took the sight in and the boy looked down at him.

The both paused before the other seemed to panic and dove back into the water to swim away.

Goro struggled to sit up and screamed after him, “H-hey! Wait! WAIT!” Goro chased him reach out. “Come here!”

He sloshed about in the water watching the black fins on boy’s back zip out to the deeper part of the water and stop. He watched them circle around and around a few times before his head came up out of the water just enough to peek at Goro.

Goro stopped at the edge of the drop off and stared out at the creature.

“…That’s a mermaid.” He spoke more to himself than to the boy watching him from a distance. “There’s a mermaid… Out there… looking at me-” in the middle of him speaking to himself the mermaid in question pulled back under the water.

“Whoa! Hey! No! Come back!” Goro waved his arms angrily, but he didn’t come back up to the surface. “If you don’t come back, I’m going to swim out there again! Hey! DO YOU HEAR ME?”

He glared at the water and watched as he saw the mermaid’s head peak out again, but this time even further back in the ocean.

“…God, he’s fast… Hey! Come back here! You can’t just leave me here!”

He watched as the mermaid’s head came up a bit higher for a moment like he was going to speak, but then he pulled himself back down into the water.

“…Fine!” Goro looked down at the water and dove forward. Sure enough as he started to swim out, the mermaid came right back and started to swim along side him, ready to drag him back to the island. This time however when Goro felt his hands reaching round his waist, he turned his body and grabbed onto the other’s arms. “Finally!”

He stopped swimming and held onto the mermaid’s arms as they swam back to the island. Once they were in the shallows Goro planted his feet down and started trying to pull back and drag him toward the beach.

“Come! Here!”

Much to his surprise, they didn’t flail about trying to shake him off this time. Instead the boy let Goro hang onto his arms and pull him back towards the beach. In doing so, Goro got an even clearer look at his fantastic savior.

As he guessed, the boy’s body was longer than he was tall. Probably by a good foot, but most of that was in his tail length. The more human part of his body was built lean and he had more of those black scales on his back where his dorsal fins grew along his spine. They trailed down into a black stripe that ran down his tail. His tail had several lines of black scales running long it lengthwise.

Once Goro’s feet hit the grass he fell back into a sitting position and continued to hold onto the mermaid’s arms. He found himself gasping for breath. The entire ordeal had worn him out. The mermaid pulled the upper half of their body up onto his legs and stared at him as they waited.

“You’re… a mermaid.”

“Hmn,” he watched the mermaid hum and reach up to twist a few of the wet locks of his hair around. “And you’re a human.”

“Oh good,” Goro rolled his eyes, “I got a sarcastic mermaid.” He sighed and pulled his hands back so he could lie flat on the ground. “A sarcastic mermaid and stranded on a deserted island. Wonderful.”

Goro felt the mermaid crawl off him and pull himself to lie next to him on the grass, “Are you okay?”

“What?”

“You’re probably very tired from going out into the water so much… And you passed out after I tried to shake you off.” The mermaid put a hand on his forehead. “Do you need any treatment?”

“Why are you asking me that?” Goro swat his hand away, “Actually, why did you even save me? Why did you bring me here?”

The mermaid looked at him perplexed, “I brought you here because humans need land to live. You fell off your boat and blacked out. If you had stayed awake, I could have taken you to it… But after you stopped moving it was easier to bring you here.” He watched the mermaid motioned around the area.

“Okay… But then, why everything else? Why are you still here? Why are you bringing me food?”

“If I just left you would die… I figured I could give you what you need to survive. Land isn’t enough, you need food, so I bring fish. And I know humans drink fresh water… There’s some of that here too! I figured could take care of you until another group of humans comes by and then they can take you home.”

Goro slowly processed what he was being told, and he felt a knot of anger twisting in his chest, “Take care of me? Like what? Like I’m your fucking pet!” Goro pushed himself to stand up. “I didn’t ask you to save me! I didn’t ask you to take care of me! I wanted to die! I was trying to drown!”

He threw his hands in the air, “And now because of you I’m stuck here! Still alive! And I don’t even have my mother any more because of you; you, stupid fish!”

Goro watched the mermaid recoil for a second at his shouting. His hands curling the grass and his fins visibly pulling back against his body.

“…You… wanted to die?”

“Yes!”

“…Why?” He slowly relaxed a bit as his curiosity started to take over. “Is that something humans do? Want to die I mean?”

Goro pinched his nose and sighed, “No, I guess… Some people do. But not everyone.”

“Not everyone?” The mermaid pushed themselves to roll over so they could sit on the ground. “So is it… Like and instinctual drive? Like to thin the heard? Is that why you keep running out into the water?”

“No, its no instinctual. It’s-” Goro waved his hand around and scoffed, “Why am I even talking about this to you… Look, fish- I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to be alive. So, I’m going to go swimming now. Do not come get me. Do you understand?”

“No.”

Goro scoffed and sputtered, “What do you mean ‘No’?”

“Is there a benefit to you dying?”

“Yes!” He threw his hands up in the air.

“What?”

“My fucking father won’t have me to push around for one! And second, I get to be with my mother! It’s nothing but beneficial! Okay!?”

Goro watched the mermaid stare ahead and flick his tail up and down, “So, you want to die for revenge?”

“Yes.” Goro nodded, “Now you’re getting it.”

“…And, this is normal among humans?”

“What does it matter if it is or not?”

“Well, I’m trying to learn about you… So, it matters. What if someone else falls off a boat and wants to drown? I need to know how to tell the difference.”

Goro pressed his lips together, he didn’t like this.

“Look, I’m not telling you to not save people. Some people don’t want to drown. I just do, okay.”

“Would other humans let you drown yourself?”

Goro hesitated. He looked down at the mermaid; he was watching him intently.

“Yes.”

“I think you’re lying.”

“Well, you’ll just have to take my word for it.” Goro turned and started walking back out toward the water. He heard a faint splash behind him as the mermaid started to follow.

“What causes humans to try and kill themselves? Do they all do it for revenge like you?”

“Oh my god…” Goro covered his face as he walked, “Can you go away? I’m busy here. I’d like to die in peace.”

“You know you’re pretty calm for a human seeing one of my kind for the first time. The last human that saw me screamed until they passed out.”

“Good for them.” Goro stopped walking as the mermaid swam around to cut him off.

“So why do human’s kill themselves?”

“…Cause we’re unhappy.”

“That’s it?” Goro watched him reach up and play with his hair again. He pulled off one of the shells stuck to his hair- it had a little hermit crab in it. The mermaid flicked it away and looked back up at him waiting for an answer.

“That’s it! We’re unhappy to the point that it consumes us. We hate being alive because our lives are empty. We’re miserable. Every moment we’re alive, we feel like our existence is causing a problem. So, we want to die.”

“…And humans just let that happen to each other? That’s awful.”

“…Some humans try to fix it.” Goro shrugged. “They get medicine, they get treated, they get better-”

“Have you tired that?”

“….No.”

Goro watched as the mermaid suddenly dove back under the water and swum around him a few times before stopping to stick his head out of the water again.

“Then let’s try it!”

“Try what?”

“Try to make you better!”

Goro frowned. The mermaid was smiling at him, his golden eyes wide.

“Move. I’m going to drown myself,” he stormed around the fish.

“Wait! Please! Just wait!” He felt the mermaid grab onto his leg. “You can’t kill yourself if there’s away to make you better! We have to at least try!”

“No we don’t! I don’t know you! I don’t have to try anything! I don’t owe it to you to try!”

“Then I’ll just keep saving you! I’ll save you until you let me try to make you better!”

“Are you kidding me!?” He tried to shake him off. “Don’t you have mermaid things to go do?”

“These waters are my home! I’m not going anywhere,” he smiled. “So, let me try! Please?”

Goro put a hand to his forehead, “If I let you try, and you fail, will you let me go?” Goro watched the mermaid’s tail flick back and forth as his face twisted with worry. “Well?”

“If I fail… I’ll help you drown yourself.”

“Well,” Goro sighed and looked out at the water. “Okay, I’ll give you seven days.” He knew seven days was far too short an amount of time. “In seven days, if I still want to drown, you have to help me. Understand?”

“Okay,” the mermaid let go. “And in seven days, when you want to live, I’ll help you get back to the mainland.”

“I doubt that… So, mermaid, do you have a name?”

“The last human I met said my name sounded like ‘Ren’ in human.”

“Sounded like? How do you say it in mermaid?”

Goro watched as Ren put his lips together and with his teeth started singing a long note that indeed had an ‘r’ sound to it. He closed off the note with a hollow tone he made by making an ‘o’ shape with his mouth and pushing his sound from deep in his chest.

“Huh… I guess that does sound like ‘Ren’. Kind of closer to ‘Re-on’ but whatever works…” Goro chuckled.

“And what’s your name?”

“Goro.”

“Just Goro?” Ren tilted his head, “I thought humans have two names?”

“Ah, you know that much…” He paused, “Akechi. My full name is Akechi Goro.”

Chapter Text

Goro made his way back to his beachside bonfire. The sand was sticking to his wet legs and feet. And his pants were rubbing against his skin, weight down by all the seawater.

Ren made his way around the island by water and was already up on the beach by the time Goro made it back. He was staring intently into the fire as he held his hand out close to the flame. His body stretched out behind him with his tail end just reaching the waves rolling up on the shore.

“I guess fire is a new experience for you?” Goro stopped next to flames and started to pull on the ends of his pants trying to dry them off.

“I’ve seen it before… But I don’t get to be near it often.” Ren put his lips together and blew into the flames. He watched the part right in front of his face flare up a bit. Seeing the fire dance from his breath made Ren excited. His tail splashed up and down, smacking against the breaking waves.

Goro rubbed at his mouth to stop himself from smiling, “I suppose you don’t…” He turned around and tried to dry off the back of his pants next since pulling at the front wasn’t working. “Do you see humans a lot?”

“Not up close.” Ren backed up from the fire and pulled himself around to where Goro was standing, “But I like to watch their boats go by. Sometimes I head closer to shore and watch your harbors. And at night I come up to the surface and listen to see if I can hear any of their conversations.”

“Do all mermaids do that?”

Ren shook his head.

“So it’s just you, huh? Why?”

“Why what?” Ren reached out and pulled at the front of Goro’s pants, mimicking his previous action. Goro swatted his hand away.

“Why do you watch humans, if no one else does?”

“Oh…” Ren pressed his lips together. Goro watched as his mouth twisted from side to side and his golden eyes narrowed. “I just think you’re neat.” He looked up and Goro and smiled as if testing to see if his answer was satisfactory.

“Right…” So, he didn’t want to answer it seemed? “You said another human saw you before, how that happened?”

“Oh!” Ren beamed and laid down in the sand. He propped his head up with his hands and started recounting the story, “Makoto was on a class trip! Whatever that is- But she had been on a boat, not as big as the one you were on, but still pretty big. But she didn’t fall off.”

“She didn’t? Then how did you meet her?”

“The humans on the boat were diving into the water. Uh, I think it’s called scrub diving?”

“Scuba diving.” Goro corrected him.

“Yes! Well, they swim around with all these tanks on their backs so they can breathe-”

“I know how scuba diving works…”

“Right, sorry, of course, you do. You’re human… Anyway! Something was wrong with her tank. I saw her panicking and struggling. She was kind of off from the group. I think the fact she couldn’t breathe made it difficult to swim. I came up to her and removed her mask to give her some air-”

“You removed her mask!” Goro shook his head, “Are you stupid?”

“Well I couldn’t put air in her lungs with that thing in her mouth,” Ren reached up to his lips. “I had to pull it out so I could cover her mouth with mine.”

Goro also reached up to touch his lips. A small realization dawned on him, “You did that to me too, didn’t you?”

“Yes! But it was easier for you. You passed out… Makoto kept trying to push me away. It made it very hard to get her to the surface. Luckily, she had not gone down too far.” Ren chuckled. “As soon as her head was out of the water she started screaming. I had to flee. I thought that would be the end of it, but her group of humans came back the next day. I saw her swimming around strangely. She still wasn’t following the rest all the way down, instead, she was looking. I realized she was looking for me, so I came up to her and we swam away from the boat to surface in peace.”

“She was very upset, claiming I kissed her. I wasn’t really sure what that was… But we had a few minutes to explain that I didn’t mean to ‘kiss’ her, as human’s call it. I just wanted to stop her from drowning. I didn’t get to talk to her long, some other humans came up looking for her. So, I had to retreat.”

“So you’re fine with being seen by one human but not many?”

Ren’s tail swayed back and forth. “I was warned not to let too many people see me. I was told, in groups, humans are like a hungry shark. But alone, they are as normal as any of us.”

“Huh, who told you that?” Goro watched as Ren’s tail stopped moving. He pulled his hands back from his face and pushed his body up a bit.

“Just a friend…”

“A friend that also watches humans…” Goro stopped trying to dry the back of his pants. “So you’re not the only one?”

“Uh…” Ren’s eyes turned away for a moment.

‘Oh, he is awful at pretending...’ Goro thought.

Ren looked back at Goro, “So! How do I start helping you not want to kill yourself anymore?”

He changed the subject, and fast. Goro might not have known anything about mermaids, but he knew a thing or two about suspicious activity.

“You’re asking me how to help me not want to kill myself? Like what? You just expect me to give you directions on how to do this?” He folded his arms.

“Well, how else am I supposed to know what to do?” Ren pulled himself a little bit closer. “I’ve never met anyone who’s wanted to die before. And you said other humans get help, so you must know something about the process! Do I need to get you medicine? A special food? Is there some part of your body I have to fix?”

Goro sighed. “I don’t know… There are all kinds of ways people try to get help. Medicine, therapy-”

“What’s therapy?”

“Therapy is… Talking.” Goro motioned with his hands, “Two people get together and talk about why the other is having problems and they try to help them feel better. And to not dwell on those problems.”

“Does it work?”

“I guess-”

“Then let’s do that one!” Goro watched as Ren pushed his upper body up off the ground with his hands before falling back down to the sand. The sight made him laugh slightly. A reaction he quickly put a stop to as he put back on a stern expression.

“I, don’t really want to talk to you, Ren…”

Ren stopped smiling, “Why not?”

“I don’t want to talk to you about what’s bothering me.” Goro turned back around and pat at the back of his pants. They still felt wet. He was going to have to take them off to dry them. “Besides, you’re not a professional. You’re just some, silly fish that dragged me out of the ocean.”

Goro kept his eyes focused on the fire as he heard Ren moving around, dragging his tail through the sand. He wasn’t sure what the fish was doing… Maybe pacing? Could mermaids pace?

Finally, Ren spoke again, “What’s a professional?”

Goro let out a long sigh and tilted his head back. Maybe he could bash his head in with a coconut fast enough that Ren couldn’t stop him…

“A professional is someone who does a thing for a living! Like helps people, or teaches people, or studies something-”

“I study humans!” Ren’s voice was so excited. Goro was growing tired of his enthusiasm. “That’s all I do all day!”

“But that doesn’t make you a professional!” Goro turned around as he shouted. “You don’t even know that much about humans! If anything, you’re an amateur!”

“So… A professional is someone who knows a lot about humans?”

Goro pinched the bridge of his nose, “Yes. Sure. Fine.”

“So if I brought you a professional, would you talk to them?”

He hesitated. What was Ren implying? Did he know someone that knew a lot about humans? Was it another human? That didn’t seem right. He was already weird about giving up information…

“How do I know they’re actually a professional? And that you’re not just making this up?”

“Why would I make it up?”

“I don’t know anything about you. You say you wouldn’t make anything up… But you’re a very suspicious individual.”

“Me?” Ren’s eyes went wide, “Why would you say that?”

“You clearly aren’t telling me everything. There’s something not quite right about you. Even though it’s only been an hour, I can tell.” Goro watched Ren huff and look around. The mermaid started flicking their tail about and poking around in the dirt. “Don’t have an answer?”

“Give me a test!” Ren looked up. “Give me a way to prove she’s a professional on humans!”

“A test huh…” Goro looked back at the fire and nodded, “I need a pot.”

“A pot?” Ren parroted back at him.

“Yes, a metal pot, to boil water in. That way I can drink it.” Goro held his hands apart to show Ren the size of pot he wanted.

“Oh!” Ren pointed off to the north, to the second island. “There’s water up there for you to drink.”

“No,” Goro shook his head. “It's fresh but I can’t drink it. It could have bacteria or parasites.”

“Bacteria?”

Goro hung his head and grumbled. “Tiny, little living things that would make me sick. I have to boil the water to kill them.”

“…Why don’t you just pick them out.”

“Because I can’t see them.”

“…If you can’t see them then are they not there?”

Goro tilted his head back and screamed up at the sky. When he looked back down Ren had backed away a little bit. He was staring at Goro wide-eyed in shock, and his fins had pulled back to his body again. Goro watched him in silence for a few minutes before he slowly relaxed.

Ren seemed to have a strong reaction to recoil when being yelled at. Goro wonders if that was just instinctual to flinch at a loud sound…

“You can’t see them… They are microscopic. That means really, really, really, tiny. I would need a special tool to see them. But its easier to just boil the water and be safe about it. Your so-called ‘professional’ should be able to understand. I want a metal pot to boil water in. Got it?”

“Got it,” Ren nodded. “I’ll be back! With one metal pot!”

Goro watched Ren turn around on the beach and pull himself back into the water before he dove under. He sighed and shook his head.

“What am I getting myself into?”

Chapter Text

After Ren left to go talk to his human ‘professional’ Goro picked through the trees to find a few thin limbs to make into a clothesline. He stuck them in the ground making an ‘x’ shape and hung his pants and briefs over them before using the larger palm leaves like a mat to sit next to the fire.

Afterward, there was nothing for him to do but wait.

He stared absently into the fire, his mind wandering back and forth between questioning how long it was going to take Ren to come back, and wondering if he could get away with drowning himself before the mermaid’s return.

He was tired enough from all the swimming he did earlier that he felt like he could easily sink to the bottom of the sea.

But right now the idea of getting up and trudging out to the ocean seemed daunting. Instead, Goro found himself slowly leaning over on his side and propping his head up with one hand.

Surly Ren would be back soon. It would be alright if he just closed his eyes for a bit next to the fire while he waited.

Goro stretched out further until he was flat on his side, using his arm as a pillow. He’d just take a little nap. He’d be up before Ren came back.

It was easy for Goro to pass out under the summer sun. He was asleep within minutes. His mind drifted over the sea of his subconscious, teasing him with thoughts of talking fish, and nearly drowning. As the dreams played back to them his conscious mind found it all absurd. A mermaid? He must have dreamed up Ren, just as he was dreaming now. None of this was real, none of this had happened. He had just dreamed of Ren, he was just as imaginary as his mother.

His mother.

She ran her fingernails through his hair and chuckled lightly. Goro kept his head on her lap and he breathed in the smell of her hospital bed sheets. They smelled like seawater.

“Have you made any new friends at school?” She whispered to him.

“No, I don’t play with anyone.”

“Why not?”

“They all want to play after school… I don’t want to. I just want to come here. I just want to be with you.”

“Goro,” his mother dragged her fingers from his hair down his neck, “You need friends. You can’t be alone.”

“I’m not alone. I have you.”

“What about that girl… Mika?”

Goro shifted slightly as the gentle touches of her nails against the nape of his neck tickled, “She’s okay. But we’re not friends.”

“Then what about Ren? He seems nice?”

“Ren is not my friend…” Goro stopped fidgeting as her hand moved down his spine. “He’s not even real.”

“But I think he wants to be your friend.”

“I can’t be friends with something that isn’t real. It’s just a dream. A fever dream from the heat...” Goro turned his head up to look at her. The sun was shining overhead, and the clear blue sky hung behind her head.

“A dream? …Goro you should wake up.”

Goro shook his head, “I don’t want to.”

“Goro, wake up.” He felt his mother’s fingernail’s poking at his cheek. They started to feel a bit sharper than normal.

“No,” he tried to close his eyes and roll back over.

“Hey! You’ll dry out sleeping in the sun!” This time hands poked at his sides. “Goro, wake up!”

Goro grumbled and reached out to grab the hands poking at him, only to be startled when they felt wet and scaly. He rolled over and blinked a few times to see Ren’s face staring down at him with concern. Goro hesitated for a moment before groaning and letting his hands go.

“No… No! You were supposed to be a dream!” He covered his face and sighed.

Next to him, Ren continued to sit on the beach, gently poking at Goro’s body. “You have to wake up. Sleeping in the sun is not good for you.”

Goro pulled his hands away from his face and sighed. He did not move, however. He glared up at the blue sky, upset that once again Ren had disrupted his time with his mother. And on top of that, Ren was still poking away at his body. His hands were gently tapping at his arms and his stomach and his thighs. Goro turned his head to glare at the fish, but Ren didn’t notice. He was too busy looking Goro over with the same glee a child did a new toy. His eyes were full of curiosity and his lips twisted as he moved his hand up and down Goro’s skin.

“Do you mind?” He smacked Ren’s hand away and sat up. “Why are you poking at me like that anyway, huh?”

“Oh! Sorry!” Ren pulled his hands back and laced his fingers together, “I’ve just never had a chance to study human anatomy before! And since you were already undressed I was just trying to understand how your muscles work… Like how your legs and hips all connect and your-”

“Stop,” Goro held his hand up and sighed exasperated, “I am not your science project . Stop touching me.”

“Science project?” Ren tilted his head.

Goro sighed, “Never mind… just… don’t touch me okay?” He looked over to where his pants were drying and grabbed them off the sticks, so he could get dressed and Ren would stop staring at him.

“Do all humans dislike being touched? Makoto had a problem with it too.”

“It’s because you don’t ask, idiot,” Goro turned his back to him while he got dressed.

“So, then can I ask you, can I touch you?”

“No.” Goro turned back around, once his pants were back on and crossed his arms. “You may not.”

“Hmmn…” Ren’s tail flopped up and down on the sand as he thought.

“You were touching me in my sleep, weren’t you? Before you tried to wake me up?”

“Uh… Just a little bit?”

Goro got down on one knee and glared at Ren, “Don’t. Do. That. Got it?”

“….Okay,” Ren looked away a few times refusing to keep eye contact before he remembered Goro’s request. “I brought your pot!” He turned from Goro and used his hands to help drag his body across the sand to where he’d left a black iron pot on the beach. He picked it up and held it over his head. “Ta-da! This is what you wanted right?”

Goro walked over and took the pot from him.

It looked old. It had a few dents in its sides, and he could clearly see where someone had knocked some barnacles off of it. But it didn’t have any holes in it, and it had handles on either side that he could use to hang it over his fire.

“Hmn…” Goro raised his eyebrows and looked down at Ren, “Your professional gave you this?”

“Yes! She said it was just what you wanted. She also told me what you are trying to kill in the water. It’s like plankton! But it makes you sick instead of being a food source.”

“Ah, yes… I guess it is easier for you to understand the idea of plankton than bacteria.”

“I never knew that humans had to worry about dangerous plankton. Can you tell me about the other things you do to your food? I’ve seen you stick the fish next to the fire until they turn black, is that so you don’t get sick as well?”

“Yes.”

“Wow!” Goro watched Ren’s eyes light up and widen. “So, the little dangerous plankton lives in the fish too!”

“Human stomachs aren’t made to eat things raw… Well, somethings, but even then it has to be in small amounts. And only certain parts of an animal. Some fish I can eat raw, but they have to be cleaned.”

“Cleaned?”

“The scales removed, the insides taken out, and meat cut off for me to eat… But I can’t do all of that here, so, I have to cook the fish.”

“…What do you do with the ‘cleaned’ parts of the fish?”

“Throw them away.”

“Really!?” Ren shook his head, “I only throw away bones. Or anything hard a can’t chew. Humans throw away the whole inside of a fish?”

“I guess it does sound strange to you. But surly your professional can answer all these questions.”

“Maybe, but I like to learn for myself.”

“Why?” Goro looked down at Ren.

The mermaid rolled his head to the side, “Why not? I want to learn about humans. What better way than to study them myself?”

“It just seems odd,” Goro continued, “You have someone who can tell you all about humans without any of the danger.”

“Yes, but she lives far away, and down in the deep…” Ren flit his tail back and forth, “Not to mention if I lived down there, I wouldn’t actually get to see any live humans, only dead ones.”

“Dead ones!”

“Yes, the humans she and her daughter bring back from sunken ships. That’s where they got the pot.”

“She and her daughter?” Goro turned the pot over in his hand. “Does your human professional have a name?”

“Yes, but,” Ren stopped. He turned his head out to the water lost in thought.

“….Ren?”

The mermaid snapped back to him, “I don’t know how to say it in human.”

“Then sing it, like you did your name.” Ren shook his head. “Why not?”

“It might cause a panic if someone else hears it.”

“Someone else?” Goro now turned his attention toward the ocean. “So, when you sing others can hear it?”

“Yes, for stretches of the ocean our songs can carry. The human professional that gave me your pot isn’t very… well-liked. Saying her name makes others restless.”

“And why isn’t she liked?”

Ren sighed a bit, “You have to trade things to get things.”

“Trade?” Goro held up his pot, “Did you have to trade for this?”

“Yes.”

“Trade what?”

Goro watched as Ren shrugged slightly, “It wasn’t really important. What is important is that I brought it to you. So now you can have water! And so now you know you can talk to me about why you want to die, and I’ll make you better!”

Goro pressed his lips together and sighed. He had honestly forgotten that’s what Ren’s pot quest was all about.

“Fine, I’ll talk to you. Some . But that doesn’t mean you’re going to fix me like you think you are.” Goro pointed up the shore. “I’m going to the other island so I can boil some water and sterilize this thing. While I do that, why don’t go get me some fish so I can eat.”

“That I can do! I’ll be back!” Goro watched Ren turn and pull himself towards the water. As soon as enough of his body was enveloped in the waves he easily pushed himself forward and sawm out into the sea.

Goro turned the pot over in his hands and muttered to himself as he walked up the shore.

“Have to trade things to get things?”

Goro’s pot of water was just coming to boil when he heard Ren calling out to him from the shore of the island. He approached the edge and looked down to see the mermaid had returned with a fish in each hand.

“I’m back. I brought you something to eat!”

Goro only nodded and carefully found footing on the rocks before holding out his hands for the fish. As he took a step back and started to retreat onto the island, he heard Ren make a questioning noise.

“Yes?” Goro turned around.

“Are you going to eat up there?”

Goro nodded, “My fire is up here.”

“Oh… But I can’t really get up there to talk to you.” Ren swam up to the rocks and plants in the way and ran his hands over them. “The slope is all covered inland growth. How can I talk to you if you’re so far back?”

‘I guess you can’t,’ is what Goro thought to himself. But he didn’t say it out loud. Instead, he twisted his lips before motioning out over the water. “It will take a little bit for my fish to cook, but I’ll come back here to eat. Why don’t you go eat yourself and come back.”

“I’ll eat with you.”

“Why?”

“Why not? Do humans eat alone?”

“No, but-”

“Then I’ll eat with you! I’ll go get a few crabs and wait for you.” Before Goro could protest Ren’s head was already underwater. He sighed. This was going to be a long seven days…

Still, as promised, once his fish was done cooking, and his water had cooled down enough to drink he made his way back to the shore. Ren was already there waiting for him. He had gathered a few crabs, as promised, and had them flipped on their backs on one of the rocks. There’s claws had all been broken off and the poor things were flailing about trying to escape.

“You’re back! So, we can eat and talk now,” Ren circled around himself in the water as Goro settled down on the slope.

Goro looked over at the crabs and frowned, “I suppose so…” Ren reached up into his rock and grabbed one of the crabs. Goro watched him raise it up over his head before swiftly bashing it against the stone. He repeated the action a few times until some of the sell broke off. He then picked away at it until there was a gap big enough he could put his mouth over.

Goro felt himself cringe as he turned away and started to eat his own meal.

After a few bites of his fish, he spoke up, “So…Tell me about mermaids.”

“What?” Ren stopped in mid-swing with his second crab. “Why?”

“What do you mean, ‘Why’?” Goro snapped at him. He glared in Ren’s direction. “You wanted to talk. So tell me about mermaids.”

“I want to talk about humans! I want to talk about you.”

“We talked about me earlier.”

“But we’re talking to help you. How is learning about mermaids going to help you?” Ren countered.

Goro sighed. It wasn’t. But he didn’t want to talk about himself… “Look, this whole ‘talking about it’ to get better. Requires trust.” He motioned back and forth between himself and Ren. “People who see a therapist. A professional, develop a trusting relationship with each other. And Its through that trust that they figure out how to help the person who wants to kill themselves. Right now I don’t trust you-”

“You don’t trust me?” Ren set his crab down and moved closer to Goro, “But I brought you your pot.”

“You also are clearly hiding something.”

Ren’s face lit up  for a moment before he shook his head, “I am not.”

“You’re awful at lying. There’s something you’re not telling me… And that’s fine. Maybe. But you’re going to tell me something before I tell you anything else. So, let’s talk about mermaids.”

Goro watched Ren sway in the water before finally nodding.

“Good… So… You mentioned your human professional has a daughter. But you live alone? Do all mermaids just, stay with their parents until they set off on their own? Where are your parents?”

“Oh, uh…” Goro watched Ren tap his chin in thought. His slender, clawed fingers tapped along his jaw as he mulled over the answer. He was clearly picking which parts he wanted to tell Goro and which parts he didn’t… “My parents live very far north of here. They live together with the rest of my siblings in a pod.” Ren motioned off to the north. “We live in family pods! Some pods even group together to live in larger groups…. There are two really close families nearby, actually. Other than my friend and her daughter.”

“So your friend and you are the odd ones living in small numbers? Why?”

“Well, my friend, like I said she’s not really… ‘liked’.” Ren reached over to grab one od his crabs. “She’s kind of territorial. And I guess others just think she and her daughter are weird because they like surface stuff so much. I mean I do too-”

“So why don’t you live with them?” Goro interjected.

“Its too far down…” Ren slammed the crab into the rocks. “I can only see so far in the darkness. They have parts of their bodies that light up, or they can see without light at all… Her daughter sometimes comes up to see me. So, I’m fine up here on my own.” Goro watched Ren bash the crab again, this time a little too hard and it exploded in his hands.

He let out a yelp and tried to salvage as much of the insides as he could.

Goro frowned.

“But you went from living with your family to living on your own…” He looked out over the water, “What about the other two pods? Do you spend any time with them?”

“Oh, I see them when I got out gathering…” Ren paused for a moment like he was trying to piece together a phrase. “Ryuji is always at the front of his pod. He’s faster than his kids and partner. Yuuki’s always bringing up the rear helping eh stragglers. I once joined them in taking down a shark. It was fun! They live east of here… And to the west, the new family Ann and Shiho just settled in. Their kids just hatched so I haven’t seen Ann out hunting as far from home as before. But she used to come by the island every now and again to gather crabs.”

“So you’re not totally alone… I see.” Goro resumed eating his fish. So, mermaids were social, but Ren lives alone. Though it seemed he chose to live alone if his friendless with the other locals was any indication. Would the other pods really not tolerate his obsession with humans? 

Well then again Goro was barely tolerating Ren himself so…

And Ren could, on the fly, translate their names into human ones. Or maybe he had already had these translated for them? Perhaps by the mermaid, he refused to name?

“Okay, now it’s your turn,” Ren moved closer to Goro and propped the upper half of his body upon the slope next to him. He let his chin rest in his hands and stared intently. “Tell how to make you not sick.”

“Ugh, I keep telling you it doesn’t work like that. There is no ‘here’s how to make me not sick’. It just… happens. Through talking.”

“Okay, well then talk!”

Goro rolled his eyes, “Blah blah blah, there. I’m done.”

“Blah blah blah?” Ren narrowed his eyes, “What does that mean?”

“It means nothing,” Goro shrugged. “Its what Mika always says when she’s told to talk, but she has nothing to say.”

“Mika?”

Goro reached over for his little pot of water and raised it to his lips for a drink, “She’s someone I knew back home.”

“A friend?”

“…I guess she was as close to a friend as I had. Sure.”

“She probably misses you,” Ren pointed out. “I’m sure when they told her you fell off the boat she was sad. Do you want her to be sad?”

Goro took another sip, “Mika will get over it. We just knew each other. But we weren’t close.” Goro set the pot down on his lap, “We just… partied together. Dancing, talking shit, drinking… We weren’t that close. Hell, she’s probably glad I’m dead so I’ll stop stealing her boyfriends out from under her.”

Ren reached up to twist some of his hair in thought. The look on his face told Goro he didn’t fully understand everything he was saying, but he was still considering it.

“The last time you saw her was she happy to see you?” He finally stopped playing with his hair and dragged out a tiny piece of kelp.

“I-” Goro looked out over the ocean. “The last time we saw each other was on the boat. She gave me a birthday present. And a hug. She seemed pretty happy to be there.”

“Were you happy to see her?”

Goro shrugged, “Out of everyone on the boat, she’s probably the person I was the most willing to see.”

“Then, I bet she misses you. I’m sure she’d want you to be alive. Just so you guys could, uh, ‘dance, talk shit, and drink’ together again.”

Goro scoffed at first. But he shortly followed up with a chuckle.

“Mika has so many other people willing to do that with her… She’ll replace me soon enough.”

“You really think so?”

Goro nodded, “There was only one person that really wanted me around. And she’s already dead.” He lowered his eyes to look down at the mostly empty pot on his lap. “That’s why I wanted to drown. Why I still want to die. So, I can be with my mother.”

He heard Ren sigh next to him. He glanced over to see the mermaid had stretched his arms out before him and was now lying flat against the slanted ground. His upper half completely out of the water and his tail still submerged.

“You still want to die…”

“I told you, this wasn’t going to work.”

“I still have six days!” Ren’s tail suddenly raised up out of the water and splashed back down, covering Goro with seawater. “You’ll see! If the thought of your friends wanting to see you won’t help you, I’ll think of something else!”

Goro shook his head, flinging water everywhere and grimaced.

“Whatever,” he stood up. “I’m going to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow morning can we talk some more?”

“Sure.” Goro climbed back up the slope onto even ground and looked back down at Ren. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Goro! I’ll make you better tomorrow! I promise!” Ren waved to him before turning and diving back into the water.

“What a stupid creature…”

Chapter Text

Goro woke up to the same sound he went to sleep to the sound of Ren singing.

It seemed the mermaid sang every night, but Goro had to admit this was the first time he heard him during the day.

He lay on his back, looking up at the sun filtering in through tree branches overhead. Ren’s tune the past few nights had been peaceful, slow, and haunting. But this melody he was singing now felt more upbeat. Granted, Goro had no idea what the words were, it all just sounded like long drawn out wordless notes and wails to him, but he could tell the tempo was different.

“I wonder what it means?” Goro muttered to himself. He supposed he could ask. But talking to Ren about his music would mean he’d have to talk to Ren. Why do that when he could just lie here and pretend to be asleep for a few more hours?

He rolled over onto his side, deciding that pretending to sleep was a better option when he started to hear a second song.

Goro lifted his head and glanced around confused. Someone else was singing now. He thought Ren lived alone? He pushed himself up to his hands and knees and crawled forward, trying to sneak his way to shore. He reached the edge of the island, where the incline started and peeked out from the bushes.

There was a second mermaid out in the water. They were swimming around Ren in circles as they sang, a long train of blond hair trailed behind them. From what Goro could see their body was covered in white and coral colored stripes, and off their shoulders and back were several, long and thin spiny fins. Ren seemed content to stay still as the circled him, almost like they were inspecting him.

Goro watched the other mermaid stop and reach out to fiddle with Ren’s hair before he started to say something back at them in a series of chirp-like notes and a few coos. Once they had stopped swimming Goro could see the other mermaid had blue eyes, and their mouth kept twisting as they studied Ren with intense curiosity.

Eventually, they stopped poking at him, and the two seemed to reach some sort of understanding. Ren and the other mermaid then dove under the water and out of sight.

“Was that someone new?” Goro stood up and made his way back to his camp confused but figured he could ask Ren about it later.

Ren didn’t return even late into the afternoon.

Goro had moved over to the southern island and taken up a seat on the shore opposite his little fire. The trees hung out over the water here, casting a shadow over the shallows. He sat on the edge of the shore with his pants rolled up to his calves and his feet stretched out soaking in the water.

He stared down into the water, his mind wandering around in circles about what to do. Ren had been gone for so long he could probably drown himself, but he couldn’t get his body to move from its sitting position. So, he sat still mindlessly staring out into the water. He sat so still for so long that eventually little fish and sea creatures began to swim around his ankles as if he was part of the seafloor.

“How long are you going to sit there?”

Goro’s head snapped up and Mika leaned across the division between the passenger’s side and driver’s side seats of the car they were in.

“Well?”

“What was the question?” Goro shook his head, “I wasn’t listening.” He was thinking about how far he’d had to drive before he let Mika out and tried to crash.

“God! You’re such a himbo… I asked how long are you going to sit there! We are stealing a car!” She reached forward and ran her hands over the dashboard. “You promised me we were going to see how fast your dad’s new Maserati could go! So let’s GO, GORO! ”

He laughed at her as he reached forward and turned the ignition. “Right right. Just name a destination, my lady, and your chariot will carry you there!”

“Oh my god, just shut and drive.” Mika leaned back in her seat as Goro pulled out of the parking space.

He wasn’t supposed to driving. He wasn’t of age yet. And he had no permit. But he knew how to drive. And he knew even if they were pulled over the by police, at most he’d just be escorted home. After all, it wasn’t the first time he’d taken a car. Just the first time he had a passenger.

So that meant the car had to come back in one piece this time.

Mika rather put a kink in his plan to crash his father’s new, shiny, ugly, custom gold-colored car and make himself and the vehicle into a gory, splashy headline. It was his fault for telling her he planned to steal it. ‘I’ve never been in a Maserati!’ she said. ‘I want to come with!’ she insisted.

Oh well. There was always the next car.

As Goro pulled out of the parking garage he pushed down harder on the gas and floored it out into the street. Immediately a car blew its horn in irritation at being cut off.

“Wheeeee!” Mika put her hands up on the roof and kicked her feet. “Oh, the roof is soft! Is it a convertible?”

“You bet, there’s a button on the dash to bring down the hood.” Goro swerved the wheel and wove the car in and out between a few slower ones, leaving angry divers in his wake. He’d press the button himself, but he had to focus on driving if he was going to keep Mika alive.

“Oh, I see it!” Mika pressed the button and the hood of the car started to pull back. The wind whipped her hair around as they sped down the road, but she laughed with excitement. “Oh, man! Imagine we showed up to a party in this thing!”

She leaned back in her seat, “All the guys we could pick up!”

“Are you saying our looks are enough anymore? Already over the hill, Mika?”

She scoffed, “How dare you, over the hill! If I am, then you’re decrepit! You’re older than I am!”

“By a few months!” Goro took a sharp turn and cut off several other cars trying to turn as well. He’d already run several red lights and there were still no cops on their tail. They must be busy. “So, you never said where you want to go!”

“Hmmmn….” Mika tilted her head back and looked up at the sky. “How about the beach!”

“With no swimsuits?”

“We can buy some from one of the shore shops there. What, are you too cheap?”

Goro started to laugh, “In a car like this, you dare ask if I’m cheap?”

They both started to laugh when their voices were overpowered by the sound of sirens. Goro looked up in the rearview mirror and sighed at the red lights.

“Wow, that was fast!” Mika turned to look back.

“Actually it was slower than before…” He tightened his grip on the steering wheel, “Want to see how long we can go before we’re pulled over.”

“Won’t that go poorly?” Mika sat back in her seat.

“Nah,” Goro shook his head, “They’ll chase us, and if they can’t cut me off they’ll throw down some of those tire spikes and forcibly stop the car.”

“Goro?”

Mika narrowed her eyes at him, “How many cars have you stolen from your dad’s garage?”

“Goro. Hello?”

“As many as he can pay the press to not report about!” Goro slammed his foot on the gas and started to speed ahead faster. Next, to him, Mika laughed and braced her hands against the dashboard. She sounded happy, but she was probably nervous.

“Are you going to respond?... Are you sleeping?”

Goro wasn’t sure if they’d make it to the beach, but they’d have a good time trying.

“GORO!”

A splash of salt water to his face snapped him out of his reminiscence. Goro closed his eyes and spit as he wiped off his face. Once he was done he looked up to see Ren eyeing him from the shallows. The mermaid grinned and giggled a bit to himself.

“Finally!”

“Ren, Goro huffed, “Why did you splash me?”

“I asked you how long are you going to sit there and watch the fish all day! But you didn’t answer me. You were asleep with your eyes open! Honestly, I didn’t know humans could do that.”

Goro sighed, “That’s not quite what happened, but sure... We can do that.”

Ren continued to giggle. Goro couldn’t stand it. He narrowed his eyes at Ren before he was struck with a brilliant idea. Goro leaned back in place and lifted his legs up out of the water. Ren stopped laughing to watch him, curious about what was going on. Goro lifted his legs up higher and higher and held them until the were level with his head. He had to lean back and use his arms to keep himself upright.

“What are you doing?” Ren looked up at Goro’s feet dangling over the water. Goro didn’t respond. “Goro?” Ren moved a bit closer. “Goro did you fall asleep again?”

Goro still didn’t answer. Though his legs were shaking from holding the position. Ren moved closer again still calling his name. The mermaid reached out to grab onto one of Goro’s legs and that’s when he let them drop, splashing water everywhere.

Ren let out a yelp as they were both soaked. Goro leaned forward to watch Ren flop backward and he started to laugh. It wasn’t until Ren saw Goro laughing that he realized Goro had been playing a joke, and he was the victim.

“Oh, I get it! You were mad I splashed you!” Ren playfully scooped up a handful of seawater splashed at Goro.

“Well, I wasn’t happy about it, that’s for sure.” Goro leaned forward and continued to chuckle, a slight smile on his face. “Besides I figured a little bit of seawater wouldn’t bother you.”

Ren shook his head, “It didn’t.”

The mermaid pulled himself up closer to Goro laid down next to him. He kept his eyes fixed on the human as Goro resumed staring down into the water.

“So were you dreaming while you were sleeping out here?”

“Hmn,” Goro nodded. “I guess so. But not really. I was actually thinking.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“…The last time my plans to kill myself were foiled by someone else being around.”

“You’ve done this before?” Ren leaned in closer to him shocked.

“I’ve tried lots of times…” Goro looked down at his arms. He extended his left one and held it out close to Ren’s face. “See here, they’re more visible because of the tan I’m getting, but those marks on my arms are cuts I made.”

Ren lifted his hand and reached out to touch the marks; his finger stopped just over Goro’s skin. He looked up at him wide-eyed, “Can I?”

Goro took a deep breath before nodded, “Sure. This time you can.”

He watched as Ren’s claws delicately traced over his old self-inflicted injuries. His golden eyes shimmering with misunderstanding and a billion questions.

“I thought these were battle scars…”

Goro chuckled, “Battle scars?”

“Well!” Ren stopped tracing Goro’s arm and pushed himself up using his arms so he could be closer to his face, “Ryuji has a bunch of old scars. But he fights every predator that comes into these waters! They look so similar to yours… I just thought you got them protecting your home.”

“Oh,” It was Goro’s turn to be shocked. He did recall Ren mentioning Ryuji had him help take down a shark. Was Ryuji the mermaid from earlier? “Well, no, these are self-made… The ‘battle scars’ I guess would be the ones on my back and on my legs.” Goro looked over his shoulder. “I got those from my father.”

“Your… father?” Ren muttered his answer. Goro looked back at him and noticed he was looking out at the water. He followed Ren’s gaze but didn’t see anything. Maybe Ren’s eyes saw something he didn’t. While he was staring Ren turned back to Goro and started asking questions.

“You’ve said before, you wanted to die because of your father… He’s not a nice man?”

“No. He’s the worst.”

“Have you ever tried getting along with him?”

Goro sneered and rolled his eyes, “Really? You don’t think I tried to do what he wanted. Nothing I ever did was good enough for him. So I just lived the life I wanted.”

“But that life didn’t make you happy. Maybe you could have tried his way more? I bet if you did, he wouldn’t have attacked y-”

“Are you fucking kidding!?” Goro snapped at him and Ren pulled back. “I’m out in the middle of the god damn ocean and I still manage to find an asshat that thinks my father is right!”

Ren backed up from Goro, “No, no, I didn’t say that- I was just asking-”

“You’re asking a stupid question!” Goro got to his feet. “You think if we could have ever of gotten along I’d have tried to drown myself? Or drink my self into a stupor? Or take drugs? Or steal his stupid cars and try to crash them?”

As Goro stood up Ren pulled away backed out into the water, “No, no. I didn’t mean that. Please stop, yelling-”

“I will not stop yelling!” Goro followed after him. “Didn’t you say you were going to try to make me feel better? How does blaming me for my shitty dad make me feel better!?”

Ren was scrambling away now, pulling himself through the shallows using his arms at a hastened pace, “I’m not blaming you! I’m sorry! It was a mistake! It was a mistake!”

Goro chased after him, refusing to let Ren get away, he tried to reach out to grab his tail, to pin him down. He could tell Ren was trying to make it back to deeper water and swim away. Goro raised his leg up high and stomped down on the end of one of the fins of Ren’s tail holding him in place. Ren immediately started flailing about, screaming for him to let go.

“I will not let go! You started this! Why do you think Shido’s right and I’m wrong, huh? Tell me?”

“I didn’t say that!” Ren pulled on the end of his tail pleading. “I didn’t! Please let go! Please stop yelling!”

“No!” Goro screamed at again, “That is what you said! Answer me, Ren!” He leaned forward and screamed as hard as he could, “ANSWER ME!”

In response, Ren erupted into a shrill wail. Goro covered his ears and stumbled backward. The sound was so high pitched, he couldn’t stand it. He turned and scrambled back to land, trying to get as far away from the noise as possible. As soon as his feet touched soil the noise stopped.

He looked back to see Ren staring at him. His eyes wide and his chest heaving.

Was that some sort of panicked response? A natural defense?

“…Ren?”

“I’m sorry!” He answered hastily. “I’m sorry! It was a mistake! I was a mistake!” Ren quickly turned in a few more heaves pulled himself into the deeper water and swam off.

Goro stood on under the trees, feeling a bit shocked and confused. But he was certain Ren did not misspeak.

“I was a mistake?”

Chapter Text

Goro waited for the rest of the afternoon for Ren to return.

He did not.

He walked all around the islands several times, even called out for him, but Ren never responded. He didn’t even sneak up to leave any fish. Meaning Goro was going without dinner tonight.

Well, he supposed he deserved this.

Thinking back on the whole incident Ren clearly started to panic when he raised his voice. In fact, Ren always panicked when he raised his voice. Either he doesn’t like loud sounds, or something has conditioned to be fearful of them.

“I was a mistake.” Goro stared into the pot of water he was boiling. He might not have any food, but he could still drink.

“Mistake…” He sat with his legs crossed and his hands resting on his knees. “He lives alone when everyone else doesn’t. Doesn’t seem to want to be around other mermaids. Can’t handle yelling… But he does interact with the others. Just wants to live alone?  Or can’t handle conflict? Or thinks he is a source of conflict?”

‘I could ask him if he comes back…” Goro sighed. “And if he doesn’t then I guess I could just drown myself as planned.”

Ren did eventually return. Long after sunset, and after Goro had fallen asleep, he was stirred out of his slumber by Ren’s song. Another sad song… At least he was sure they were sad. To his ears, the tone was always somber, lonely. If he had to compare it to something else reminded him of the kind of lone howl, he’d hear from isolated wolves on nature documentaries, but woven into several notes instead of one long call.

A lone tune sung at night.

Goro slowly sat up and listened to Ren sing.

After a few minutes, he got to his feet and moved away from his campfire toward the end of the island.

“Ren?”

The singing stopped.

“Come on, Ren, I know you’re there… I promise not to yell.” Goro could hear the water splashing about as Ren swam around. He was probably debating on if he was going to come closer or not.

“Look if you’re worried… The water is too deep here for me to pin you down so…”

“I’m not worried about that,” ren responded. His voice was low, sheepish. Goro’s lips twisted.

He looked around; Ren sounded pretty close. But he couldn’t see him. He should have brought a torch from his fire.

“Then what are you worried about?”

“…I don’t want to make you mad again.” Ren responded. “If you get mad… You won’t be happy. And then you’ll kill yourself.”

“I’m not going to kill myself because of you, Ren.”

“…Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Goro stood still as the sounds of water started up again. Eventually, he saw Ren’s head peaking out of the water as he came out from the area to Goro’s right, hidden just behind some rocks. However, Ren kept most of his body submerged, letting only his neck and head show, he kept his eyes cast down. He looked so small and pathetic.

Goro moved toward the edge and sat down, letting his feet dangle into the water. He sighed and reached his hand out. Ren stared at him unsure of what to do, and honestly, even Goro didn’t know what he was trying to do. Ren wasn’t a dog. He couldn’t just pet him and make him feel better…

“Give me your hand,” Goro finally spoke. Ren lifted his hand out of the water and Goro grabbed on tight. He pulled back as hard as he could and Ren resisted a bit, but eventually gave in and helped Goro pull him forward. He reached up with his other hand, and Goro grabbed it, so he could pull Ren up onto the island to sit with him.

Once settled he continued holding onto Ren’s hands, carefully stroking his thumbs over the back of his palms.

“…I’m sorry I yelled at you.”

“I’m sorry I gave you a reason to yell at me.”

“No,” Goro shook his head, “You’re trying to help me. You don’t know my situation, its natural you’d ask about my father’s perspective of things. I just- I didn’t want to answer you. I’ve been asked many times before to try things his way… It doesn’t work.”

“I see…” Ren lowered his head. He didn’t speak. But he didn’t pull away either. Still, the silence made Goro uneasy.

“I won’t yell anymore.” He watched Ren to see if he would lift his head, “I promise.”

“Okay.”

Ren still didn’t talk.

Goro let out a defeated sigh and released his hands. He turned his attention back out over the ocean and sat in silence for a long time.

“…Can you sing some more?”

“What?” Ren slightly lifted his head to look at him.

“You’re singing. It’s, nice… It’s kind of melancholic- at least to my ears. But I still like it. No clue what you’re singing, though.”

Ren laughed, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.

“What? It's funny that I don’t know what it is?”

“No… I mean, yes. But no.” Ren looked up at him with a faint smile, “I guess it’s… Kind of sad. But it’s my song.”

“Well, it’s nice… I’m sure your friend’s like it too.”

“My friends?” Ren blinked a few times in confusion.

“You know, the other mermaids… uh, Ann, Ryuji… One of them was here yesterday morning, right?”

“Oh! You saw Ann!” Ren nodded. “Oh yes, we’re friends but, my song-”

“What? Does she not like it?” Goro asked, but just as quickly as he did, he recalled how the music changed once she arrived. “She sings that happy, upbeat, pop-y tune! Of course, she doesn’t like your sad music.”

“Oh no, that’s not it… She doesn’t dislike it.” Ren opened his mouth a few times like he was trying to say something and failing. Goro watched the mermaid waffle on what he was trying to say a few times before finally, Ren spoke again, “She just, can’t understand it.”

“Like she doesn’t get the meaning?”

“…No, like… You can’t understand it. She can’t either.”

Goro shifted in his seat and peered at Ren. “Excuse me?”

“You can’t tell me what I’m singing, can you? You just hear a tune, right?”

“Right.”

“Did you hear that same tune last night?”

“Uh…” Goro paused. He heard Ren singing last night too. He nodded. “I heard you last night.”

“You didn’t answer me. Was it the same?”

“Hmm… I think so? Actually, I just remember it was kind of sad.” Ren looked away. He smiled as he did but Goro could tell it wasn’t out of happiness. “Are you… Singing the same song every night?”

“Yes,” Ren turned back to him. “It's my song. It's how everyone knows who I am. I can hear Ann singing, and I know ‘That’s Ann. She’s coming this way. Or she’s having trouble. Or she’s celebrating.’ But Ann hears my song and hears… Just… noise.”

Ren smiled at Goro. He pressed his lips together and reached up to fiddle with his hair. “It’s just noise to them. They know someone is singing but-”

“No,” Goro cut him off, “I saw her and you interacting. Or talking… She was talking to you.”

“Oh yes, we can talk!” Ren nodded, “But talking and your identifier song are two different things. She… Never knows it’s me until she’s here. Until we are face to face.”

Goro opened his mouth as realization dawned on him, “And that’s why she was looking at you so funny. She was making sure you are… You.” Goro pointed at Ren, “You live alone because no one can recognize you.”

Ren nodded, “Yes.”

Goro frowned. Was that the mistake? That the others couldn’t recognize him? Was it really that big of a deal? He tapped his chin in thought. The only thing he could compare it to was like a fingerprint. And it really wasn’t that big a deal if your fingerprints didn’t work… Was he born that way? That would be quite the mistake...

“I mean… I lived alone before that.”

“Before?” Goro asked. “So your song didn’t always sound like nonsense to everyone?”

Ren turned to him, “I wanted to understand humans. I was offered a chance to understand them. So I took it. I thought it would be better, since I- I had trouble with my own kind.”

Goro stared at Ren speechless. “You traded it away… To those professionals.” He put his hand over his mouth. “You don’t get along with your kind because you’re ‘a mistake’?”

Ren hesitated, “I’m a runt.” He folded his hands together, “I’m kind of…I weighed down my family. I did try. I tried very hard to keep up my parents and my siblings and do everything. It never worked out… I usually got in the way during hunts. Or couldn’t gather what they felt were adequate supplies. It- It didn’t help that I spent all my free time watching human boats.”

“…Did they yell you a lot?”

Ren nodded. He reached up and put his hands over his ears, “Mostly my siblings. Always upset they had to share with me. Wait on me. That I had to be there… So one night I just figured it would be easier if I wasn’t.”

Goro looked away form Ren out over the ocean and the night sky.

“My father yelled a lot too. Especially when he was hitting me.” He half chuckled, “You’d think I’d know better not to treat someone that way… But here I am, yelling at you. Stomping on your tail. Acting like Shido. Reminding you of your family… You were just asking if I tried. Because you tried.” Goro leaned back; he placed his hands behind him and used his palms to support his body. “But you’re here, alone. So, you have to know, trying doesn’t always work.”

“So when trying doesn’t work, you just kill yourself?”

“Seems like a better solution than to continue to suffer.”

“You could just leave. Like I did.”

“Its easier for you… You just swam away. My father… He controls everything. He has a lot of power. He controls tons of other people and their lives. And my life. All I had to look forward to was to die, and see my mother again.”

“But you said, someone else stopped you before?”

“Oh, yeah, Mika…” Goro tilted his head to the side. “She was my friend. My only friend, I guess…”

“Don’t you think she’ll miss you?”

Goro shrugged, “I mean, we were friends, but… Not, really.”

“What do you mean not really?”

Goro didn’t answer right away. He wasn’t sure he could get into the complexity of human relationships or explain them to Ren without the mermaid insisting he should have tried for Mika…

“She didn’t recognize me.” Goro turned to Ren, “Like how Ann doesn’t recognize you. We saw each other all the time. We spent time together. We even exchanged gifts… But…Who I really am, I don’t think Mika ever saw that person.”

“Oh.” Goro locked eyes with Ren. It was such a short answer. But there was a clarity in his eyes like he understood.

A smile slowly crept over Ren’s face. And Goro felt one growing on his. Ren turned to look out over the ocean and started to sing.

Indeed the tune sounded different to Goro’s ears than what he had heard earlier that night. But he could still tell it was Ren. He slowly let his body lean back and closed his eyes as he listened to the song.

Goro was all alone.

Ren was all alone.

No one knew who they were.

Two lonely souls, unrecognizable to the world. Castaway on an isolated island.

In spite of it all, the knowledge filled Goro with just a little bit of happiness. And even if he didn’t know the words, he was certain that there was a little bit of happiness in Ren’s tune, too.

Chapter Text

Goro fell asleep to Ren’s singing.

The mermaid’s haunting melody had lulled him into a comfortable sleep on the end of the island shore after he shut his eyes. Granted falling asleep on the edge of the island with his feet dangling over the sides probably wasn’t the best place to rest, but with Ren next to him he felt safe enough to drift off.

He’d never been sung to sleep before, at least not that he remembered.  Perhaps when he was an infant his mother sang him to sleep. Though those songs were probably sweet and loving. He still had no clue what Ren was singing. Maybe he’d ask him during their next conversation.

Goro continued to lie on the side of the island with his feet dangling off, even as the sun rose up overhead and it’s rays started to warm his skin awakening him to the world.

He couldn’t hear Ren singing now. Just the sound of the ocean gently lapping against the shore and the breeze cutting through the trees overhead.

How many days had he been here?

Goro crossed his hands over his stomach and let his legs kick back and forth in the water.

It would be time to kill himself soon wouldn’t it? This had to have been his third or fourth day out here with Ren, right? With Ren…

Even though the mermaid had been somewhat annoying, after last night he felt he understood him a bit better. Maybe they could come to trust each other. But as for feeling better within a week’s time… Well… Maybe he didn’t have to kill himself on the seventh day exactly…

Goro continued to ponder his situation as he swung his legs. Eventually, he felt something in the water brush up against his ankle. He didn’t think much of it at first until it latched on. He stopped swinging his legs and tried to shake whatever it was off.

“What the heck?” Whatever was on him held on tighter. He felt it squeezing and sticking to several places along his skin. “Ren?” Goro sat up. “Is that you?”

Goro leaned over the side of the island and pulled with his leg. However, the moment he pulled up, whatever had him pulled down.

“S-shit!” Goro brought his other leg out of the water and tried to leverage himself on the slope to pull back. “Let go!”

The creature that had him held on even tighter, pulling back with its own force. It started to drag Goro down off the slope of the island and towards the water.

“Fuck- FUCK!” He scrambled reaching around to grab onto the nearest tree limb or bush and clung on for dear life. Goro started swinging his leg wildly trying to shake what was dragging him loose. “REN! REN WHERE ARE YOU!?”

His voice echoed around the area, but Ren didn’t respond.

Goro looked back down at the water as he felt the hold on him creeping up his leg. Coming up out of the water he saw a long, thin, orangish looking tentacle coiling its way up his skin. And a second one was coming up out of the water to try and grab his free leg.

Oh, he’d seen this movie before.

Nope.

Did not care for this at all.

“REN!!!”

Goro started trying to pull himself up and onto land again. But he was clearly losing this tug of war. His heart was racing. He didn’t want this creature to drag him down into the depths. Or maybe he did? If some rogue sea monster killed him he could die without the guilt of leaving Ren by himself… It wouldn’t be his fault he drowned…

Goro bit his lower lip and contemplating letting go. Would this creature kill him right away? Would it be slow and painful?

“…Ugh… Ren…” Goro took a deep breath and let go of the plants he was hanging onto.

The creature at the end of his legs yanked him into the water with one seamless tug. His head submerged under the water and his arms flailed as he tried to recover. The water rushed into his nose and over his eyes and blocked his senses for a good moment.

However, once he was in the water, he was not dragged down further. He actually felt the creature release his legs, allowing him to pull himself up to the surface. With a few sputters and gasp Goro looked around confused.

“What the hell?” He tread water in place turning his head left and right scanning the area. He did this a few times until suddenly a face popped up next to him.

Right out of the ocean a face burst up from under the waves. Goro found himself staring at a pair of mischievous mauve colored eyes on the face of a girl with very light orange, soft and shiny looking skin. Her hair was the same color, but it looked like she had a mixture of small tentacles growing out her skull. The locks of hair were long and floated on the surface of the water around her face, but the shorter tentacle parts perked up and moved about, some even reaching out for him though they were too short.

As they stared at each other Goro found himself stuttering out of shock. There was a third mermaid here now?

And this one looked so… different?

The longer he tried to find something to say, the more the new mermaid just stared at him. Her lips pressed together into a thin line that slowly became a wide smile across her face.

He didn’t like it.

“Uh…” Goro tried to paddle and back himself up a bit. “Hi… I’m- well, you’re probably looking for Ren… He's not here, and I don’t know where he went…” Goro’s back hit the edge of the island. The mermaid followed him. As soon as he couldn’t swim any further a larger tentacle raised up out of the water. “Uh… I’m not sure what you want… I don’t speak mermaid… You probably can’t even understand me…”

The girl used her appendage to pat him on the head a few times before a second tentacle came up and she started playing with his hair; gently pulling at his locks and ruffling it about.

“Okay… That’s… not cool- can you stop.” Goro tried to reach up and push her off. However, she quickly grabbed his wrist to move his hand and a third tentacle came up to resume poking at his head.

“Uh. Great, why do all you things want to touch me?”

“Touch is the most readily available way to learn about something new.” She answered him.

Goro paused for a moment after she answered.

And then he started to scream. Not for Ren. Just scream. In response, she screamed back at him, just as loudly.

They continued on for a good minute before Goro stopped and she stopped in turn.

“Do all humans scream as an introduction or is this just something you do?”

Goro felt his face contort with confusion and annoyance, “You speak!”

“Well, yes.”

“Why did you grab me!?”

“You had your feet in the water. And I figured it was easier to study you down here rather than climb up onto the land.”

Goro continued to stare at her with annoyance and disbelief, “Let go of me! I’m not some stupid science project for you stupid fish to poke at!”

“Such hostility… I wonder if this is normal. Is this what scared Ren away?”

“I’ll tell you what’s not normal!” Goro started kicking his legs and thrashing since she wouldn’t let go of his arm. “Dragging people into the ocean- wait, what?” Goro stopped fighting. “Scared Ren away? What do you mean?”

“Hey. You need to be careful with that thrashing. You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“… No! Let go of me!” Goro resumed resisting. “And what did you mean Ren was scared away!?”

“Calm down, human!”

“LET GO!”

The mermaid opened her mouth to show Goro her teeth as she let out a gurgling hiss. Under the water, his legs were suddenly seized and the girl’s orangish color changed before his eyes to black with a green undertone.

“Stop before you hurt yourself!”

“No!” Goro continued to try and resist her. In response, she rolled her eyes.

“Fine! On land, it is then!” The mermaid ducked her head under the water and started to swim. Her tentacles went with her, dragging Goro along. He yelped and flailed as he was dragged under. The seawater quickly rushed around him as she hauled from the second island over to the beach.

Within a minute she was hauling herself and Goro up onto the sand next to his bonfire. She used her tentacles to roll him forward onto the beach where Goro tumbled for a bit, still screaming. Once he stopped rolling, he got up on his hands and knees sputtering and cursing.

“What the hell! I’ve never been treated so rudely in my lif-” he was cut off by black and green tentacles grabbing him again and a weight crawling upon his back. “What are you doing!” He ended up falling back down into the sand. Goro kicked his feet and smacked his arms on the ground as he looked over his shoulder.

This mermaid was clearly some sort of octopus. From the stomach down she was all tendrils. Her skin was smoother, no signs of scales like on Ren, and her coloration changed and flickered the more agitated she was becoming.

“I ask the questions human,” she calmly responded. “Question one! Why did Ren send out a distress call? Question two! Why are you so rude? Question three-”

“Shut up! I’m not answering you! You’re attacking me!”

Offshore the twos shouting was interrupted by the sound of Ren letting out a loud call. Both Goro and the new mermaid turned their heads to see him angrily swimming up from the ocean. Ren kept repeating the same trilling call over and over again.

“What is that? What is he saying?”

“Hmmn…” The other mermaid let him go, slowly pulling back her tentacles and sliding off Goro’s back, “He’s saying my name.”

“Your name?” Goro rolled away from her the moment she lifted herself. “Pru-tata? Fru-tatata? …Futaba?”

“Is that what you hear?” Goro could swear her tone was sarcastic. Did mermaids understand sarcasm? Ren hadn’t displayed the capacity for it yet. “What an oversimplification of my name.”

Oh. It was sarcasm. No. Goro didn’t like this new mermaid one bit.

Ren came rushing up onto the beach, pulling himself up in a hurry and still frantically speaking to Futaba in their language. Goro watched as Futaba’s body changed back from black to orange and the tentacles on her head shifted and fanned out. Ren continued singing and every now and again Futaba’s head would move or her orange would alter slightly; even her lips would part but she made no noise. The longer Goro watched it slowly dawned on his she was speaking, but he couldn’t hear her.

Was it just in body language and color? Or was she speaking in a pitch he couldn’t hear?

Ren sighed, and finally resumed speaking in human, “I’m sorry I didn’t come to tell you to ignore my distress call… I didn’t think you’d hear it so far away.”

“Well, I did. Your voice carries you know…” She turned toward Goro and a crooked smile crept up on her lips. “Besides, I’ve been wanting to come here anyway since you said you found a live human.”

“Wait?” Goro pointed at Futaba, “You understood Ren’s scream from yesterday?”

“Yes!” She lifted her head high, her tentacles lifting up off her skull a bit, “Well, I mean, I understood that a sharp strange noise filled the air. Clearly someone was trying to signal they were in distress. And Ren is the only one around here who’s long-distance calls sound like several sea creatures beating each other to death.”

Goro felt his shoulders slump. It wasn’t just the song? It was all long-distance noise? What would have happened then if Ren was actually in distress? Would no one come? Would he just die…

Goro straightened up and glared at Futaba, “Hey! If you knew Ren was in danger, why did you take so long to come here!  He could have been hurt!?”

“I was helping mom with a new addition to her experiments… She wasn’t going to let me just swim off-”

“In other words, you were so wrapped up in your experiment you didn’t realize how long it had been,” Ren reached over and poked at Futaba’s tentacles with a smirk on his face.

She coiled her tentacles closer to her body and her coloration brightened.

“It was very important! But I promise I came as soon as I could.”

“As soon as you could, huh?” Goro watched as Futaba turned her head to glare at him. The tips of her head tentacles turning colors.

She understood when sarcasm was directed back at her.

Good.

“It’s fine… I was never in any real danger. Goro is my friend!” Ren turned to him to flash him a bright smile.

“Ah,” Goro nodded in response and looked toward him, “Right.” So, Ren is fond of having him here. Then he was right to think that his death would have a poor impact on him. But at least he knew Ren wasn’t totally alone. There were the other mermaid families around… And this… annoyance .

“Anyway, now that you know… You should probably head home-”

“Home!” Futaba cut him off, “Did you not listen. You have a live human. I need to inspect him.”

“I don’t want to be inspected!” Goro stood up. “So, go home like Ren said!”

“Oh come on, we never get live humans in the depths. Only dead ones!”

Goro shuddered. If he died did that mean this girl was going to drag him down to the depths to be experimented on… He turned to stare at Futaba. This must be the daughter of the ‘human professional’. So, they studied corpses? They were also responsible for Ren’s inability to communicate…

“You can’t just take Goro and poke at him,” Ren shook his head. “Besides, I’m trying to help him feel better, so he won’t kill himself.”

“Well, why don’t I help you with that then?”

“No.” Goro shook his head. “No, go away, Futaba, you are not helping.”

“Futaba?” Ren asked.

“It’s what he hears when you say my name.” Goro watched as Futaba started to say something and then stopped. She looked at Goro and then looked back to Ren. Her lips curled together and her hair shifted from orange to red and Ren let out a chuckle.

“Stop that,” Goro crossed his arms.

“Stop what?” They both turned to him.

“Talking in a way that I can’t understand you.”

Futaba turned to Ren and did it again.

Ren looked from her to Goro, “She says ‘No’.”

“You… Why don’t you sing like Ren does!?”

“Wow, Ren, got yourself a stupid human, huh?” Futaba let her tentacles spread out over the sand, “Do all humans talk the same? No. Just because you can’t hear my words doesn’t mean I’m not making them. Your human ears don’t have the capacity to understand the full range of vibrations my vocal cords can make.”

“Huh…” Goro frowned. Well, Futaba certainly seemed… Educated? Was that even the right word for this? She just knew a lot. A lot more than Ren. She knew how to explain things to him and seemed to understand a lot about creatures outside of her species. Maybe she and her mother really were the local human experts?

“So… What’s your mother’s name?” Goro redirected the topic.

“Oh…” Ren tried to answer. “Well if you hear her name as ‘Futaba’ then her mother’s name would be-”

“Wakaba,” she finished Ren’s sentence. “And believe me, if Mom could come up here, she would. But you know how the sunfish are… They get up in arms when we come to the surface. That’s why I didn’t announce I was coming.”

“Futaba,” Goro interjected, “Ren said everyone gets agitated by you and, Wakaba because you ask for things in return. High prices I wager for things from the other merfolk around… Why? If all you’re interested in are humans?”

“We’re not just interested in humans. It’s just there’s so much to learn about you. And we have such little access. Mom can only learn so much form a waterlogged, rotting body and the scraps of human society that float down to our home.” Futaba started to shift along the sands. “It's not like when Mom was young when she could come to the surface. Oh, so many of us came to the surface and interacted with humans! At least that’s what she tells me…”

“She used to come to the surface?” Goro was shocked. “Why did she stop?”

“What you humans call ‘technology’. You became very dangerous to associate with. Started killing other things in mass-droves. Mom doesn’t know much about new human world ways… So, we study what we find! But Mom’s really good at picking your brains.”

“Ugh,” Goro recoiled, “I get the feeling you mean that literally…”

“Oh, it’s a fascinating process!” Futaba suddenly pushed herself up to ‘stand’ on her appendages. She reached out for Goro with two of them, and before he could pull away she had them wrapped around his neck. Her tentacles poked at his face and she leaned in closer wiggling her fingers at him. “Mom’s able to use organic electrical currents to light up human nerves and watch your brains work. The better the brain, the more info she gathers. The more things she sees! She’s going to teach me someday- But oh, what we wouldn’t give to be able to run a current through a living brain!”

“Let go!” Goro started to pull on her tentacles, immediately creeped out. No one was running experiments on his brain. And certainly not some creepy octopus-child and her creepy mad-underwater-scientist mother!

“Futaba,” Ren calmly spoke up and the girl stopped messing with Goro. They both turned to look at him. Ren had a pensive look on his face. It was perhaps the most serious expression Goro ever saw him make. “Why did you come here? Was it really just because I was in danger…? Or do you just want to take Goro away from me?”

“What?” They both asked.

Futaba let go and sank back down to eye level with Ren, “No, no, no, no! I don’t want to take him from you! I really did come because you screamed! I just- you know- he’s here!” She motioned to Goro. “I’m not going to take him! I’m just joking. Mom’s not going to come take Goro away.”

Ren peered at her. Goro watched the way his fins pulled back against his body and he refused to look her in the face. He didn’t quite believe her. Did Ren have reason to distrust her? Honestly form his perspective, he felt they shouldn’t trust her.

“If your Mom wants a live human, there are several out in the ocean today.”

“There are?” Futaba perked up.

“Yes. That’s where I was… There’s a boat out near where Goro fell into the water.”

“There is?” Now Goro was curious. He hadn’t even asked where Ren went once he got back.

“Yes. It's much smaller than the one you fell from… But there are lots of humans. They’re all scuba diving. They’re going down very deep. You two could easily snag one.”

“Wait,” Goro leaned down and interrupted the story, “They’re scuba diving? Where I fell?” He felt his heart race. “Are you certain?”

“Yes,” Ren nodded, “I know these waters. It’s the same spot.”

“Did you get a good look at the boat? Did it say anything on it? Like words? A name? A company?”

“Oh, um,” Ren reached up and fiddled with his hair while he tried to recall the boat. “I didn’t get a good look… I didn’t want to be spotted so I stayed pretty far back from the boat. Only came up a few times…”

“Do the words ‘Search and Rescue’ sound familiar?” Ren shook his head. “Uh… Recovery? Investigation? Coast Guard?”

“Oh!” Ren nodded, “I did see the word Guard in big red lette-”

“Shit!” Goro jumped up shouting at the top of his lungs. Ren immediately pulled back and Futaba looked back and forth between the two concerned. “Sorry… Sorry… that’s not about you. That’s- that’s-”

“Those humans are looking for him,” Futaba explained. She turned to Ren, “They’re seeing if he survived. They’ll keep combing the ocean for a while until they feel satisfied that he’s dead.”

“Oh…”

Goro rubbed his chin anxiously. This was bad. If they found him he’d have to go back to the mainland. He had to stop their search.

“Ren!” Goro knelt down again, “Can you back out there to the boat and damage its motor.”

“What?” Ren shook his head. “You want me to damage the boat.”

“Uh, excuse you, that’s dangerous!” Futaba shoved her head in between them. “What if they see him! No, he can’t do that.”

Goro leaned around her to keep eye contact with Ren, “If they find me I’ll have to go back home! Back to my father!”

“SO!” Futaba leaned further to block Goro again. “Ren is not going to risk himself for you.”

“Oh, what do you care! You stole his song!”

“I didn’t steal it!”

“Your mother did, same difference,” Goro put a hand on Futaba’s head and shoved her down to the ground. “Ren.” He held the mermaid’s gaze.

“I’ll die before I go back to the mainland. If they find this island, I will kill myself.”

Ren’s eyes went wide. He looked out over the water in a panic. Futaba reached up with all her tentacles and shoved Goro over. He started to shout and she sat on him.

“Get off!”

“No! You can’t just say that! You’re making Ren risk his life for yours! No! Maybe I should just drag you into the ocean! Save everyone some trouble!”

“Futaba…” Ren reached out to grab her shoulders. She coiled her appendages around Goro’s arms to stop him from resisting.

“You’re selfish!”

“Get off of me!”

“First you scare him!”

“Futaba, listen”-

“Now you’re threatening him-”

“This doesn’t concern you, you, stupid cephalopod!”

“Will you two stop!”

“You’re such a miserable human! Are all of them like you!?”

“If you don’t get off of me, I’m going to eat your stupid tentacles for lunch!”

“Both of you-” Ren opened his mouth and let out another scream.

Both Goro and Futaba jumped. The former scrambling off Goro and curling up as tight as she could to protect her ears. Her whole body turned white at the noise. Goro covered his own ears and grit his teeth. Ren held the note for much longer this time until he ran out of breath.

As soon as he stopped Futaba slowly uncurled herself. “Owwwwie. It’s much worse up close.”

“I’ll go.”

Goro uncovered his ears, “You will?”

“Yes…” Ren looked down at the sand, “Their presence here is making you unhappy. I promised to make you happy.”

“Ren,” Futaba inched forward, “Don’t go. If the human’s see you, they could kill you. Or worse!” Ren didn’t say anything to her. Futaba rubbed her face and groaned. “Okay, fine… Then I will help you.”

“You will?” Goro looked at her shocked.

“Of course I will! I can’t let anything bad happen to Ren.” She folded her arms and pushed herself to sit upright so she was slightly taller than Ren. “He has to live to see how big I’m going to get! I’m going to be as big as my Mom one day!”

Ren chuckled dryly, “You don’t have to remind me I’m a runt, Futaba.”

She coiled a few of her tentacles around Ren’s middle, “Once I’m full-grown, I’m going to take you on the farthest and fastest swim of your life! You’ll see so many humans your heard will spin! Then you won’t be so fond of this one anymore!”

Ren continued to laugh and gently pat Futaba’s tentacles. Goro forced a smile, though the idea that Ren wouldn’t be fond of him once he met other humans stung.

She slowly unwound herself from him and sighed, “Okay. Ren, first we need to stop off at one of the wrecks on the floor. If I’m right, we should be able to find some good chunks of debris we can slingshot into their boat’s propeller. It will stop them from looking, and save us from having to get in close.”

“You got it!”

Futaba then turned and pointed to Goro’s fire, “And you, human, make that smaller so they don’t see the smoke. I know you creatures need to keep warm. But even if we stop them form looking. That will attract them eventually.”

Goro looked over at the fire and nodded, “Okay.”

“We’ll be back!” Futaba turned to Ren and clearly said something Goro was not allowed to be privy to. The two nodded at each other and hauled off into the water and out of sight.

Goro sat up on the beach staring at the waves and rubbed his arms where Futaba had held him down. She wasn’t wrong. It was terrible of him to threaten Ren for his own safety… But he didn’t want to go back. He just couldn’t. Still… He felt, awful.

“Oh, Mom…” Goro closed his eyes, “I’m becoming more like him every day…”

Chapter Text

“How is the coffee?”

Goro paused as he pulled the mug away from his lips. It was a plain white porcelain mug. A smile crossed his lips.

“It's fine. I like it.” He set the mug down and across the table the girl before him smiled. Her expression was bright and joyful. She always seemed so bubbly. Like a little girl. She was a child. Not a woman.

Not like Mika.

“I’m so glad you’re enjoying it. Most of my friends refuse to come here when I tell them the blend is fertilized with elephant dung.”

He watched her reach up gently play with the ends of her strawberry curls.

How could Shido expect him to marry such a fanciful girl? How much money was he making on this arrangement? On his misery?

“Actually, I’m just happy in general you seem to be fond of coffee. This will make planning dates easy,” she giggled to herself.

“I don’t really like coffee,” Goro placed his hands on his lap. “I don’t really like any food.” He watched some of the joy drained from her face. “I just eat what won’t kill me. As long as I don’t feel like I’m going to wretch, all food is good.”

“Oh.”

No smile this time. She reached out for her cup and brought it to her lips.

He was going to ruin this.

Goro reached up and grabbed his cup. He could slightly see a reflection glaring up at him.

His father’s disgusting frown.

Goro swallowed and put the cup down, “So, Haru, other than coffee, what do you enjoy?”

Haru looked up at him. There was a glint of curiosity in her eyes, but he could see her lips were twisting with restraint. She wasn’t as eager to express her joy about her interest now.

“Look, Haru- It is alright that I call you Haru, yes? We’re going to be engaged… I know I don’t care about food but, really you must like something else?”

Haru sighed, “I enjoy gardening.”

Goro pressed his lips together.

“I like cats? Do you like pets?” She asked.

“I’m… More of a dog person I think.”

“Ah.”

An awkward silence hung over them. Both of them reached out for their cups and started drinking their coffee. Goro turned to look out over the restaurant they were dining in. No one else was there. No one, save for the owner and he was sitting on a barstool doing a crossword puzzle. He was left alone in perfect silence.

God, Goro wished that was him.

“Well at any rate,” Haru spoke up again, “I’m still glad that our parents arranged this.”

“You are?” Goro looked back at her.

“Yes. I mean, we might not have much in common but, you seem much more polite and nicer than my previous fiancé. So, I’m sure we can make it work.”

Goro caught himself before he rolled his eyes too hard. He seemed ‘polite’ and ‘nicer’ than her last boyfriend. Women- no girls had such low standards. He knew Mika to toss away boyfriends like napkins if they even so much as stepped out of line. He’d kill to be engaged to her. Every night they’d party and go home with someone different. No obligations. No pomp and circumstance.

No pretending to like her.

Just the reality of his disastrous life spiraling down the drain.

Instead, he was here, with Haru. This sweet, polite little girl, that clearly needed a father figure more than a husband.

Goro picked up his coffee again.

“I guess this is better for you then.”

Haru cleared her throat. She then excused herself and made her way to a little bathroom in the back of the store.

“Hmmn,” The store’s owner spoke up as soon as the bathroom door shut. “A three-letter word for effort? Or an attempt?”

Goro looked around. Was he asking him or just thinking out loud?

“Also a verb for taking someone to trail…” the man tapped his pencil against the end of his bearded face.”

“Try.” Goro spoke up.

The man lifted his gaze to him. From behind his glasses, he tossed Goro an uninterested stare, “You should.”

Goro’s mouth hung open. The man didn’t break eye contact with him until the bathroom door opened up. He looked back down at his paper and didn’t even write anything down. Goro snapped his head back to look across the table and scowled.

As Haru took a seat she paused in place, “Is something wrong, Goro? You look a bit unsettled?”

Goro glanced a the store owner and then back at Haru, “I think I’m developing a distaste for coffee.”

“Oh…Uh, well, shall we pay and be off then?”

“Fine by me.” Goro stood up and put the exact amount on the table. He’d be damned if he was going to leave a tip. Fuck this place. Some shitty hole in the wall café with no customers and shitty staff… It’d be closed by the end of the year. Even if he had to pay off a health inspector to do it.

Outside the café, Haru walked with her hands folded before her. She kept a slight distance from Goro. He walked with his hands in his pockets. They didn’t really look like a couple.

“Ugh,” he pulled a hand out of his pocket and reached for her’s. The moment he grabbed at her she jumped away. Goro looked at her shocked, “What? I’m trying . Isn’t that what you want?”

“Oh, oh… Sorry. I,” Haru looked down at his hand, “You don’t have to.”

“Really?”

“I mean, I guess… But not right now. Only when people are watching.”

Goro peered at her, “Why? I thought you wanted us to get along?”

“I mean, I do but I,” Haru hesitated. She took a few deep breaths and looked down at the sidewalk, “I don’t really want you to touch me.”

Goro pulled his hand back and shoved it back into his pocket. “Fine by me.” He started walking again, this time at a faster pace. Behind him, Haru called for him to wait. He could hear her moving faster now to catch up to him.

“Goro, please, wait… Don’t take it the wrong way.”

“And how should I take it? First, you’re happy we’re together, and now you don’t want me to touch you?” He rolled his head from side to side as he talked, “Maybe I’ll just call my father and tell him I’d rather hang myself on my wedding day than do this-”

“Goro!” Haru gasped, “You shouldn’t joke about that!”

“Who’s joking…” He stopped and turned to her. “So? I can’t touch you?”

“It’s not you… I just… I don’t… I don’t want men in general to touch me.”

Goro watched as Haru looked away. Her cheeks just next to her curls were turning pink as she tried to not look at him to gauge his reaction.

“Men? …You don’t like men?”

Haru bit her bottom lip and shook her head before bowing to him, “I’m sorry! I’m really sorry… I know this is inconvenient for you. And I understand I still have obligations to fulfill and I will, but I- just when I have to. Please. I don’t mind if you see other women. I won’t complain. I just-”

Goro looked up from Haru and out ahead at nothing. He felt a smile creep across his face as Haru went on trying to explain herself. He started to chuckle and put one hand over his eyes. Haru looked up shocked and worried.

“Goro?”

“You don’t like men. You don’t like men!” He pulled his hand away and beamed, “Well lucky you. I don’t like women.” Goro watched the color drain from Haru’s face. He continued to smile at her. “You don’t have to worry about me wanting to touch you. The thought has never crossed my mind.”

“Are you serious?” She nearly whispered the question.

“Of course I am.” Goro held his head up high as she smiled. “Obligations, duties, marriage… This will work. We’ll get married, the whole song and dance… And then- separate rooms. Our own lovers. Our own lives!”

“I- I can have a girlfriend?”

“Your girlfriend can be our live-in maid for all I care.”

“What about you?”

“I’m not the settling down type,” he shrugged. “So, do what makes you happy and I’ll do what makes me happy.”

Haru breathed a sigh of relief.

“Goro, you don’t know… How much of a weight off my shoulder’s this is.” She smiled at him, not the same fragile one she had back in the coffee shop. It wasn’t one of a little girl, but a very calm and reassured woman. “But still, we will eventually have to work something out. I know my father has already expressed his desire to secure the family’s hold on his company.”

“Eh,” Goro curled his lips. “We can still get around all of that. I’ll shoot something in a cup for you-”

“Goro,” Haru’s eyes went wide as to how dismissive he was over this.

“What? Hell, we can even pay the doctors to make sure it’s a boy. So, you only have to have one.” Goro waved his hand in the air, “And if you don’t want to carry, we can get a surrogate-”

“You, how can you say that- it's so crass… Don’t you want kids?”

“What?” Goro’s face twisted in confusion. “What does it matter. We don’t like each other. Hell, if we play this right we’ll hardly even have to see each other.”

“But we should still be friends. Especially if there will be children.”

“I don’t really see the point. I thought you understood, I don’t want anything from you.”

This time, when the color drained from Haru’s face it wasn’t from fear or shock. No there was something else in Haru’s eyes. Something that sent a bit of a chill down Goro’s spine. How quickly he had seen her many faces. A little girl, hiding a woman trying to be herself. And now that woman was looming over him like she wanted to take a knife to his throat, or better yet a swift ax and just remove his whole head.

“Well, you’ve just got it all figured out haven’t you.”

“Well… Yes?”

Haru’s face was like stone.

“You’re so cold and selfish. You certainly are Shido’s son, aren’t you?”

Goro finished shrinking down his bonfire. He’d spent the better part of the afternoon throwing sand into it, and pulling out some of the limbs to toss into the ocean. The fire was now a fraction of its size. During the entire ordeal, he cursed himself.

Why did he ask Ren to go stop the boat? Why did he tell Ren it was his job to make him happy? He wanted all of these things for himself… But what had he done for himself?

He couldn’t keep doing this. He was truing into Shido. Making unreasonable demands of others just because of what he wanted.

He was such a piece of shit.

“…But what did you expect?” He muttered to himself. “Of course, you are. Look at you. Have you ever made anyone happy? Anyone at all?”

Goro stood next to the smaller fire and stared out at the late afternoon sky. In about another hour he wagered it would be sunset and the mermaids had still not returned.

“You’ve never made anyone happy… Not even yourself. How can you ask that stupid fish to do it? What’s wrong with you?”

Goro kept muttering to himself.

“You really are awful. No wonder you have no friends. No wonder he’s so hard on you. No wonder you’re you .”

Goro took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

“Fuck. Mom… I need you.”

Goro kept his eyes closed and started running forward. He felt his feet splash into the water. The waves sloshed up against his legs as he kept running. His body slowed down as he went deeper but Goro kept moving forward.

Eventually, he felt his feet slip out from under him and he splashed forward. He still kept his eyes closed as he pulled his head up and coughed and sputtered. He started blindly swimming forward.

“I’m sorry!” He shouted out at nothing. “I’m so sorry, Mom!”

Goro felt his chest heaving.

“I don’t want to be like him! I want to be like you!”

Goro’s arms flailed about wildly as he pulled out into the water. The waves came up and smacked against his face. The seafoam came up into his open mouth.

“I hate this! I hate him! I hate being alive!”

Goro eventually stopped swimming and tread water for a second.

“I’m so sorry, Mom… I tried…”

Goro took a deep breath and dove under the water. He started to swim down, grasping at nothing. His eyes squeezed shut. He didn’t know how far he had gone or where he was going. But he knew he was going to end it.

He opened his mouth to scream into the darkness and let the water in.

And as soon as he did he felt several limbs wrap around his torso and pull him up.

The moment his head broke the surface he started screaming.

“Ah! Stop! Stop let go of me!” He swung his arms around wildly.

“Calm down it's us!” Futaba’s tentacles squeezed around his gut.

“Goro! Goro, what are you doing!?” Ren’s hands reached out to grab his arms and touch his face trying to calm him. He sounded distressed.

“Stop! Just let go! I’m done! I’m tired!”

He still kept his eyes shut. He refused to look at them as he tried to free himself. “I don’t want to do this anymore!”

“Goro, no! We took care of the boat! The humans are gone! You’re safe now! It’s okay!”

“It’s not okay!” He cried. He could feel Futaba trying to drag him back to the island. “I’m not okay! I can’t do this! I can’t become him! Let me drown!”

“Goro!”

“He’s fighting so much! Stop struggling you’re going to hurt us both!”

“I said let go, damn it!”

“Goro, why are you doing this?” Ren sounded like he was panicking. His tone was all over the place. His voice was breaking. “Please, Goro, let us help you!”

Goro let out a yell of frustration and dug his nails into one of Futaba’s tendrils.

“I’m going to let go!”

“Don’t!”

“Yes! Let go!” As he screamed he felt Futaba release him and immediately Goro stopped thrashing and started to sink. But Ren grabbed him by his shoulders. He refused to let him down.

“Goro! Swim!”

Goro did not.

“Goro, please!” Ren’s body struggled in the water. “Futaba, help!”

“Just let him drown, Ren. He wants to die.”

“No!” Goro felt Ren tug him as hard as he could and the next thing he knew he was on his back. Underneath him, Ren used his entire body to support Goro and keep him above the water.

He finally opened his eyes and found himself staring up at the now red sky.

Ren wrapped his arms around Goro’s waist and started to swim for shore.

“I won’t let you drown, Goro. I won’t!”

Goro gasped as few times and turned his head this way and that. He tried to pull Ren’s hands off of him, but the mermaid held fast. He even tried to rock his body from side to side so he’d slide off, but failed. Ren corrected his balance each time, pushing Goro back up onto his chest and stomach and continued to swim on his back.

It was few more minutes of awkward swimming until finally, Ren rolled over and Goro found himself dumped into shallow waters. The mermaid’s hands grabbed onto his arm and pulled him towards the beach with all the grace of someone hauling a sack of potatoes.

Goro’s legs dragged in the shallows, and eventually, he started to stumble along until he was crawling up onto the beach with Ren.

He remained on his hands and knees in the sand, his head hung and his lungs burning for relief.

“Why!?” Ren started shouting. “Why were you trying to drown yourself!?”

“…I can’t…” Goro shook his head.

“I got rid of the humans! We’ve been getting along! I thought you were becoming happier!”

“I can’t!” Goro lifted his head to scream at Ren. Goro noticed Ren recoiled a bit, but just as quickly recovered. He was keeping himself upright using his arms, though they were shaking in the muddy sand. All around his golden eyes, the whites had turned pink and red, and Goro found himself wondering if mermaids could cry.

“You have to try!” Ren shouted back. “Please, Goro, you have to try!” Ren took a few deep breaths himself and then spoke in a whisper. “I don’t want you to die… I’m trying to make you happy…”

Goro pressed his lips together. He said nothing and crawled past Ren up onto the drier part of the beach and fell onto the ground. He rolled onto his back and looked up at the sky. Ren stayed down closer to the shore but Futaba followed him up.

She leaned over him and into his field of view. He could see her mouth pulling down to one side into a frown.

“I- I just can’t, Ren… I can’t turn into him. I hate him.” Goro closed his eyes. “I just want to be with my mother. Why can’t you understand that.”

“…Your mother?” Ren asked. Goro didn’t answer.

He felt his breathing calm down and his mind felt empty. So close again. And stopped again.

Ren started singing, not his usual sad tune, but in short little burst. In between, there was silence. Goro imagined Futaba must have been talking to him in her own way. As each stretch of silence became longer, Goro noticed Ren’s responses came faster. Shorter and sharper. More succinct. Whatever Futaba was saying she was making him angry. At least that’s what he guessed.

Soon, Ren stopped singing and Goro heard something splash back into the water.

Around him, he heard the octopus moving on the sand until she coiled a tentacle around his leg.

“What are you doing?”

“Making sure you don’t leave.” She sounded annoyed.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Apparently I do,” Futaba huffed. “You know, human, you’re a real piece of work. So cold and selfish. You don’t really care what happens to Ren, as long as you’re happy, do you?”

Goro didn’t answer. He felt his chest tighten and he turned his head away.

He turned his thoughts away.

But in his mind, he could see Futaba glowering at him, with the same cold expression as Haru. And Ren smiling at him with the safe soft glow as his mother.

He tried to be happy.

He really, really did.

Chapter Text

It had been hours since Ren left.

Goro hadn’t moved.

He was certain his leg was asleep form Futaba’s tentacle down.

The sun had set.

The stars were out.

Neither he nor Futaba had said a word since Ren left.

He had to go to the bathroom.

“…Hey,” Goro mumbled, without turning to look at the mermaid. She didn’t respond. So, he raised his voice. “Hey.”

Still nothing.

“Hey, Futaba,” Goro turned his head to her.

“What?” She asked dryly.

“Let go.”

“No. Ren told me to make sure you stay on land.”

Goro stared at her, keeping his face as straight as possible, “I have to take a piss.”

“Do it lying down.”

He grumbled and pushed himself to sit up, “Just let me go for a minute.”

“No.”

“Why not? It’s just going to take a minute!” God, she was annoying.

“You could run out into the ocean. You’ve already proven you’re unstable and untrustworthy!”

“So, if I do, just drag me back.”

Futaba crossed her arms, “I don’t want to.” She shrugged her shoulders. “If you run out there, you’ll die. And then I have to explain to Ren that you’re a selfish jerk. And his feelings never mattered. And he can’t get hung up on the fact that he couldn’t help you.”

Goro frowned at her, “I’m not going to run out into the water.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Ugh,” he covered his face with his hands and mumbled. “Why do you even care if Ren’s upset that I die?”

“Excuse me?” Futaba snapped at him.

“I asked why do you even care? You clearly don’t care about him.” He sneered.

“Where did you get that idea from?” Futaba’s skin started turning black again as she grew agitated.

“The fact that you stole his song! And isolated him here around this stupid island!”

“I did not ‘steal’ Ren’s song! He traded it to us so he could speak to humans!”

“So, you couldn’t ask him for something else?”

“It was the most valuable thing he had!”

Goro held his hands and made two little mouths, “Hey there, Futaba and Futaba’s mom!” He started using one to talk making a silly voice. “I’m a lonely, runty, little fish striking out on his own! And I like studying humans but can’t understand them! I heard you study humans too!”

Goro started using his other hand to talk, making an equally as foolish voice, “Why yes, we do! We can teach you to understand them! But it’s going to cost you!”

“Oh? What could it possibly cost? Do I have to work for you?”

“No!”

“Do I have to gather things for you?”

“No!”

“What then?”

“Give us your voice! Cause we’re like… Horrible sea-witches or some shit. And we’re going to deprive you of your ability to ever be part of a community and make proper friends!”

“Seems legit! Here you go!”

And then Goro threw his hands up into the air and waved them around, “Yay! You and your mom are assholes!”

Goro watched as Futaba took in a deep breath of air and puffed out her cheeks. Her entire body was fluctuating between black and green as she glared at him.

“So don’t come at me saying I don’t care about Ren’s feelings. He could have been friends with the other mermaids in this area if not for you two.”

Futaba opened her mouth and let all the air she’d been holding out, “You don’t even know if that’s what happened! Which it isn’t!” Her tentacles started flailing around. “Ren made the choice to offer up his song! He’s the one who said he didn’t fit in with other mermaids! In fact, we even said he could live with us, but his body doesn’t make luminescence like ours so he can’t stay down in the dark!”

“You still could have asked him for something else.”

“Do you know how hard it is for my mother to do things like that! And she doesn’t make the rules! The exchange has to be equal!”

Goro wrinkled his nose at her, “What? Like some law of science?”

“It’s not science,” Futaba folded her arms. “It’s called ‘magic’. I know humans know what magic is.”

Goro rolled his eyes at her, “Magic isn’t re-” He stopped himself and reconsidered. He was talking to a mermaid. “So mermaids know magic, huh?”

“Some of us do.” Futaba reached out with one of her tentacles and grabbed the end of one of the sticks in the fire. She pulled it out and waved it around in between her and Goro like a torch. “Mom says humans used to do magic too. That she and her mother and sisters would come up to the surface and do exchanges with humans that could do weird things. But the rule was always the same. Magic only works if the exchange is willing and equal.”

Futaba coiled a second tentacle around the stick and snapped it in half. She took the second half up to the burning end and held them together.

“Magic is just… passing one thing onto the next. But filling the void created with something from the first. She can’t just give Ren a whole new way to talk without taking another. She doesn’t even like to do magic that often! She actually really likes the ‘science’ stuff you humans invented. That’s why she studies your technology and brains.”

“What about you? Do you like magic?”

“Hmmn,” Futaba waved her two torches around, “I want to do magic-science! I think it would be neat to see if we could conduct magic on a human brain. Instead of just using electricity to playback sequences and thoughts. I’d like to use magic to make a human alive again! But Mom says something would have to die for that to happen.”

“Do not bring back a dead human,” Goro scolded her, “I’ve seen that movie, you’ll ruin the world.”

“Ohhh!” Futaba tossed her torches back into the fire. “You’ve been to movies! Tell me about them! Tell me every one you’ve ever seen!”

Goro pointed at his leg, “Only if you let me up.” She frowned. “Equal exchange.”

Futaba grumbled about him not running for the water as she let go. Goro got up and turned to head toward the trees. As he walked away Futaba kept shouting at him.

“Anyway! I care much more about Ren’s feelings than you do!”

“Sure you do!” He stepped over a few bushes and behind a tree, “That’s why it took you a whole day to come check on him!”

“I was busy!” She shouted back but sounded a little bit closer.

“I don’t know why you think that matters? If you’re his friend you’d come right away.”

“And if you were his friend you wouldn’t betray his trust.”  Goro peaked around the tree, he swore it sounded like Futaba was coming closer to him. However, she wasn’t next to the fire when he looked out. “He risked his safety to make you happy, you know.”

Goro jumped when Futaba’s voice came from next to him. He turned his head to see she’d made her way over to the tree and had climbed up the side. Her tentacles were tangled up in the branches and she was leaning around to look at him. “He spent the entire time we were out there talking about how much you needed him.”

“…Are you seriously going to watch me?”

“Never seen a human ‘take a piss’ before! I wanted to know what you meant!”

Goro closed his eyes and sighed.

Afterward, Futaba told him he should have just said he had to pee.

The two took up their spot by the fire again, and once again she wrapped a tentacle around his leg.

“Won’t your mother worry that you haven’t come home by now?”

“She knows I came to see Ren. And if there was any trouble, I’d call for her.” Futaba was back to poking at the fire.

“Hmn, how long will Ren be gone for?”

“No clue! He didn’t say. He just said he had to go find something for you.”

“For me?” Goro watched her play with the fire.

“I told you. He’s really set on helping you… Not that you deserve it. At least when he helps others they give something back.”

Goro leaned forward to rest his arms on his knees, “So… Ren being helpful is normal?”

“Mom says he’s ‘conditioned’ to do it. He was trained to ‘be of use’ even if he did a bad job. You foolishly told him you had a problem and now he wants to fix it.” Futaba motioned out around the water. “But the others- He helps Ryuji, they split food. He helps Yuuki they’ll spend time playing together. Shiho helps him hunt, he’ll watch her tadpoles. He helps Ann, she’ll bring him shiny things she finds on the floor. He helps you… He gets what?” Futaba turned to him.

Goro shrugged.

“Exactly. There’s nothing in it for him. Even if he could help you- you’d leave him. And he foolishly counts you as a friend. He’ll never see you again.”

Goro pressed his lips together, “I never wanted him to help me.”

“But you agreed! And you can’t even be bothered to stick to the agreement!”

“How do you know about that?”

“Ren told me everything when he came to get that pot. And he told me more while we were out breaking the boat. He likes having you here…. And he’s going to be sad when you’re gone. Even sadder when that ‘gone’ means dead. But you never considered that, did you? You just ran out into the ocean to die… Didn’t think about the fact that your bloated, water-logged corpse would be floating around his island when he got back?”

Goro bit his lower lip and stared into the flame.

No. He hadn’t really been thinking about that. Now the image of Ren swimming up to his dead body was stuck in his head.

“So… what do you expect me to do? Just… live here forever?”

“I don’t know. You have to figure that out. With Ren! And not by yourself!”

Goro rubbed his forehead. Thinking about someone else? He wasn’t any good at that. He hadn’t done that since-

“I’m back!” Ren’s voice called out from the waves.

Goro lifted his head and Futaba let him go. She crawled out to meet him.

“Great! Now I can head home!” Futaba stopped at the shoreline and peered at Ren as he pulled himself onto the beach. “What’s that in your hands?”

“It’s for Goro!” Ren held up a very familiar-looking picture frame. “It’s his mother!”

“Mom?”  Goro got to his feet and rushed over. Ren held out the picture to him and Goro took with his hands trembling.

It was indeed his photograph. The edges of the frame were split on one side, and the glass had cracked terribly. Water had gotten between the picture and the glass, but it was still intact. His mother’s face was still intact. He carefully picked away the broken glass and stared in awe.

“You… You, went to go find this? Why?”

Ren twisted a finger in his hair, “You mentioned her again… And you called for her the first morning you woke up on the beach, and when you fell from your boat. I don’t really get how that thing is your Mom, but you said you wanted to be with her. I thought it might make you happy to have it.”

“That thing is a photograph, Ren,” Futaba corrected him. “Humans make pictures that can last forever. They’re of things, places, other people. That one must be of Goro’s mom.”

“Yeah, what she said…” Goro still looked at the picture shaking in his hands. “This is her, and me… Just before she died.”

“She died?” Futaba asked. Goro just nodded in response. Futaba turned to Ren and said something private once again.

“I don’t think that she’d want that though!” Ren said back to her. He turned to Goro, “Is that why you want to die? Because she died? You think she wants you to come be with her?”

“I-” Goro hesitated. His mother had never said that. “I- She wanted me… To be happy.”

“Then, let’s keep trying to make you happy, Goro!” Ren insisted. “I’ll keep your father from the island! I’ll do everything I can for you-”

“Ren,” he shook his head.

“I mean it! I said I would make you happy-”

“Ren!” Goro got down on his knees, “You, you shouldn’t do this.” He glanced at Futaba. “Please, let’s call it off. There’s no way in seven days I’m going to be happy.”

“Then seven weeks.” Ren was unyielding. “Or seven years.”

“Ren, come on…” Futaba shook her head.

“I know you can be happy. I saw it last night. You just have to try.”

Goro looked down at the picture of his mother. Ren had gone crawling around half the night on the ocean floor for this. For him. He couldn’t think of anyone outside of his mother who had paid him such kindness. What would she say if he refused Ren’s generosity?

“…I should try…”

Ren beamed as Goro looked up. Yet Futaba shook her head.

“I’m going home,” she declared. “I’m going to tell Mom about your human… Maybe she’ll have a solution for his lack of happiness.”

“You think so!” Ren looked excited at her.

“I doubt magic could fix my depression. Besides… I don’t want or have anything to ‘trade’.”

Futaba started to crawl away from them back into the ocean, “Well it’s better to ask her than leave it to you two! Because either he’s going to kill himself in a random spontaneous act! Or You’re going to make Ren so miserable he wants to die too!”

“Come on, Futaba, that won’t happen.”

“We'll see!” She shouted at them one last time before her head submerged under the water.

Ren turned back to Goro and smiled gently, “How do you feel?”

“…Better.” He wasn’t sure.

“Are you hungry? I know I didn’t really get to go hunting today. I could go now?”

“No, I want you to stay.” Goro sat back in the wave break on the beach and Ren crawled up to sit next to him. He looked down at his mother. With the broken glass removed he no longer had to face his reflection. Just her undaunting smile. “…Could you sing again?”

“Of course,” Ren nodded. He turned out to the ocean and started his song.

Goro looked down at his mother and took Ren’s music in. His heart felt heavy. He should try. But what would come of it? Futaba was right, he couldn’t stay here forever. He’d have to leave. All of his choices meant he’d eventually hurt Ren…

He really had just agreed to this without any consideration. He was awful. He was going to die. And Ren would be all alone like he was.

Goro felt Ren’s hand on his shoulder, “Are you okay? Your crying?”

Goro looked up at him and took a deep breath, “I’m sorry… I’m just…” He trailed off. “Thinking how beautiful your song is. I, I wish my mother could have heard it.”

Ren offered up a half-hearted smile.  Goro got the feeling he saw through his lie. “Maybe one day we can make a song together? One we can both understand?”

Goro hesitated. He kept his eyes on Ren, watching the light from his fire flicker across his face. They were at eye level with each other,  his golden eyes were fixed on Goro, filled with expectation. It was the face of someone who had hope. Something he lacked. The face of someone willing to try even in the face of constant failure, something he couldn’t understand. The face of someone other’s valued and considered himself after all others. And in his eyes, Goro could catch his own empty reflection.

There was so much in Ren that Goro didn’t have. He couldn’t understand it.

And he knew he was going to ruin this.

“Yes. I’d like that very much.” Goro felt his chest constrict as Ren smiled. When he turned away to continue to sing, Goro looked back out at the water.

He knew he was never going to make that song. It was just going to hurt Ren when he was gone.

Just like it hurt him when his mother was gone.

Chapter Text

Goro woke up still on the beach under the late morning sun. He was covered in sand, which was highly uncomfortable. He pushed himself to sit up, groaning and grumbling about it as he heard Ren greet him.

“Good morning!” The mermaid was over by Goro fire, which had a few fish stuck on sticks cooking next to it. “How are you feeling today?”

“Ren?” Goro dusted off his hands and arms as he looked over the scene, “You’re cooking the fish?”

“Yes!” He answered excited. “I figured you’d be hungry when you woke up, so I went ahead and cooked your food so you wouldn’t have to wait.”

Goro sat still stunned. He hadn’t been expecting that. But then again, he hadn’t been expecting Ren to bring him his mother’s picture either. He turned to his side and still found it beside him. Goro picked it up and looked down at her face with a fond smile.

“Wow,” He looked back up to see Ren staring at him. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you make that face.”

Goro chuckled as he put the picture down and made his way over to the fire to eat. Ren ate with him. The mermaid had even cooked one of the fish he caught for himself, curious to try it the human way.

“It's too crunchy….” His lips curled as he ate. “But I kind of like the flavor.”

“It's too crunchy?” Goro shook his head, “You eat crabs!”

“The inside of the crab is soft, though! This is all crunch!”

Goro laughed. “Maybe tonight you should bring me a crab. We can boil it, and you can try that next.”

“Boil it?”

“In my pot of water. We’ll put it in and cook it in the water over the fire.”

“Alright!” Ren nodded and resumed eating his fish. Goro watched him, trying not to laugh at the faces he made as he made his way through his meal.

Ren glanced up at him every now and then but didn’t speak again until they were done eating.

“So, you’re feeling okay today?”

“…Yes,” Goro shrugged his shoulders. “I feel okay.”

“Having your mom is helping?”

“Yes.” Goro nodded.

“Good! What else can I do to help you?”

Goro pressed his lips together and shook his head, “Ren? Do you ever not help someone?”

“That’s an odd thing to ask?”

“Futaba says you often help others at your own expense… I just want to know, do you ever stop and consider that maybe you shouldn’t?”

“No,” Ren answered right away. “I want to help you, Goro.”

“…I’m just saying, I don’t think-”

“We shouldn’t focus on this.” Ren cut him off. “I think we should just try to relax today. You were really upset yesterday, and you hardly ate, and you tired yourself out swimming.”

Goro let out a slight scoff and shook his head, “You’re impossible.”

He stared at Ren, as the mermaid was waiting for him to either agree or keep pushing the topic. Goro didn’t really feel like fighting right now.

“Okay… How about we spend the afternoon on the south end of the island? Where all the little hermit crabs are in the shallows? We can… I don’t know talk about human things?”

“We can talk about your Mom,” Ren offered up. “I’d like to learn about her. Maybe if you tell me about the way she was, I can figure out how to make you happy.”

Goro sighed, but nodded and smiled, “Okay.”

Ren dove back into the water and swam around the island while Goro slowly walked along the beach. He held his picture in his hand and traced his thumb over the image. What was he going to do? Was there even a proper solution to this mess?

Probably not.

When he arrived at the end of the island, Ren was waiting for him. He was playing some odd game in the water where he flipped over the little hermit crabs as quickly as possible, trying to get them all on their backs at once before they’d turn themselves over. Goro walked around in the shallow water until he found a rock poking up high enough that he could use it as a seat. He watched Ren mess around for a little bit before the mermaid came over to him.

“Do you want to play? It’s easy. The one who gets the most crabs on their back before the first one flips back over wins.”

“Sounds to me like you like bullying crabs.”

“I’m not bullying them! They’re fine.”

“I bet those crabs are thinking, ‘Oh god, it’s Ren again! Can’t he stop turning my house on its head!”

“If anything they are thinking anything, it's probably that they are happy they’re too small for me to eat.”

“That too,” Goro reached out to poke at Ren’s forehead. “…I think my Mother would like you.”

“Really?”

“Yes.” Goro nodded. “She was always smiling like you are. She always tried to tell me positive things, or happy stories.” Goro looked down at his picture. “I spent all the early years of my life by her side. My father was hardly around… They got married out of convenience. They were dating because she was good looking and popular. It boosted his popularity to have a beautiful woman on his arm everywhere he went.”

Ren leaned over and glanced at the picture. “You look like her.”

Goro scoffed, “You only say that because you’ve never seen my father…” He looked away. “I’ve got her hair and eyes… But, everything else is his. Even his rotten personality.”

“I bet she didn’t think you were rotten.” Ren looked up at Goro and smiled, “I certainly don’t.”

Goro pressed his lips together and closed his eyes, “She always did her best to smile and be happy. Even after she got sick… I don’t think she ever once cried outright when I was around. I always thought she’d get better. That things would go back to normal. But she died.”

He turned back to Ren and held up the picture. “This was taken just before her last breaths. She died on my birthday. We shared a cupcake- it’s a type of sweet food. We made a wish together. And she asked me if I enjoyed it. She asked if I was happy, and I was… A few hours later she was gone.”

“…I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. It’s… No one’s really.” Goro looked at Ren who was staring at the picture again. “…Hold still.”

“Why?” Ren tried to look up and Goro put his hand on Ren’s forehead.

“I said hold still,” He pushed his hair away until he could see the top of his face and placed a kiss on it. “There.”

“Hmn? That was… A kiss? But you kissed my head?”

“My mom used to kiss my forehead all the time. You asked what kind of things she used to do.”

“I thought you had to kiss on the lips?”

“You can kiss anywhere,” Goro rolled his eyes and half smirked. “It means different things depending on who it's from and where they kiss you.”

“It does!” Ren’s eyes opened wide. “Can you explain it to me?”

“Oh, I guess I should have seen that coming… Okay.” Goro shifted on his seat so he could face Ren directly. “You’ll usually get a kiss on the forehead from a parent or caretaker. It’s meant to make you feel better-”

“Really?” Goro could see Ren’s light up at that bit of information.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, let me finish.”

“Okay, okay…”

“You can also kiss people on the cheek, usually that between family and close friends. It’s a goodbye, or a hello… If it’s between lovers, and you’re not departing, it’s usually something playful, depending upon the mood. Like an invitation to fool around.” Goro watched Ren tilt his head as he was trying to understand. “Uh… fool around… Mate? Fuck? I don’t know what you guys call it.”

“Oh,” Ren nodded, “We have songs for that. And dances. Some of us can even change colors like Futaba.”

“I do not want to know what her ‘fuck me’ color is so we’re going to move on.”

Ren put his hands over his mouth and started to laugh.

“So along the same vein, there’s your hands…” Goro reached out and took one of Ren’s hands. “Kissing the back of your hand can be respectful. Or flirtatious.”

“How do you know?”

“It’s all in the eyes. Eyes closed and down,” Goro lowered his head and looked down at Ren’s skin, “Is reverence. Eyes up and making contact,” He looked up at Ren, “Is bold, daring. You want the attention of the other person, and you want them to know your intentions are more.”

“Oh.”

He turned Ren’s hand over and pulled back. With his other hand be poked the center of Ren’s palm and then up his arm, “Kisses along here are more sensual… Really you’re only going to give or get these if you’re in the process of sex. Trying to get your partner worked up. Not the kind of thing you should do in public unless you want everyone to know what’s going to happen as soon as you’re alone.”

“Humans kiss in a lot of different ways…”

“You could say we like to put our mouths on a lot of things.”

“Like how Futaba puts her tentacles on everything?”

“…No.”

“Are you sure?” Ren narrowed his eyes at him.

“That last one I’m going to teach you is on the lips,” Goro ignored him and put his finger over Ren’s mouth, “This is the one that upset Makoto. Mouth to mouth is… Kind of viewed as important by some people. It’s a very important bond. Lots of human cultures use it as a sign of sealing a bond of affection and love between partners. It's also very interpersonal. You’ll kiss on the lips all the time before, during, and after sex… Unless you’re with a hooker then there’s usually a rule-”

“A hooker?” Ren spoke, his lips moving against Goro’s finger.

“Don’t worry about it,” Goro shook his head. “Anyway, kissing on the lips, is important to a lot of people. Only kiss someone on the lips if you’re serious about them. If you love them a lot.”

Goro pulled his hand back, “There’s more but I feel like those are the important ones.”

“That’s so much info… Humans use kissing for as much as we use song for.”

“Oh yeah…” Goro thought to himself for a moment. “So, can you… not do any long-distance singing?”

Ren shook his head, “Anything that carries a certain distance is just noise.”

“…What kind of songs are for long-distance?”

“Well, identifying songs, emergency, warnings-”

“Communication between family?”

“Yes.”

“What about things like hunting? Like if you are coordinating something?”

“Yes, that too.”

Goro frowned slightly, “Finding a mate?”

“Y-yes,” Ren nodded.

“…Do you ever want it all back?”

“It’s not impossible for me to do those things, I’m just limited.” Ren reached up and played with his hair nervously. “I’ve managed to get along just fine. Besides, once I started living alone, none of those things were important anyway. There’s no one around that needs to call out to me or that I need to call to-”

“But you sing every night, Ren,” Goro pointed out. “You’re singing something. And you sound unhappy.”

Ren looked down at the water for a moment, “I might be a little isolated. But it’s fine,” He looked up at Goro and smiled. “If I hadn’t done it, I’d have never found you. I think this is well worth the trade.”

Goro took a deep breath and held it. How could Ren say that? What if they had never met? What if he had successfully killed himself? This fish was so dumb. Trading everything for nothing. For even thinking he could make him feel better…. He exhaled.

“Ren, what will we do when time is up between us?” Ren tilted his head to the side but didn’t answer. “Will you really help me drown?”

“I’ll think of something.”

“You’re so confident you’ll save me… But, haven’t you spent so much of your life trying to help others and failing?” Goro watched Ren’s expression narrow as he looked away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up your siblings.”

“It’s fine,” Ren reached up and put a hand on Goro’s, “You’re not like them. That’s why I know this will work out.” He leaned up until he was slightly over Goro and placed a kiss on his forehead.

Goro couldn’t help but frown as he tried to suppress a blush. He should have seen that coming. He knew Ren was going to retain that one out of all of them and still the mermaid managed to sneak it in.

“Alright! Alright! Let’s play your silly crab game for a bit! I want to move on!” He pulled away and Ren laughed.

Goro laughed too. Part of him hated that it felt so good. He knew it couldn’t last forever.

Chapter Text

Goro and Ren remained in the shallows until late into the afternoon. The boys spent their time playing various games Ren invented, while Goro told Ren stories about his mom and the various ways she used to take care of him.

It actually did make him feel better to talk about her so much.

He never really had a chance to talk about her on land.

Shido never wanted to talk about her, only putting down Goro’s reminiscing with a cold and heartless ‘She’s dead.’ And he spoke of her a few times to Mika, but they were hardly ever in a setting that was appropriate for such talk.

However, Ren wanted to know about her. And being able to tell all of his memories of a happier time made him feel a bit more positive about his situation.

Maybe he could stay with Ren past the seven days…. Not forever, but, then again if he wasn’t found by the rescue crew it would be forever.

Maybe it was best not to dwell on it and just enjoy the rest of the day.

“I should go get some crabs for dinner,” Ren looked up at the sky. “The sun is going to set soon. How many do you think I should get?”

“I think two will be enough for me,” Goro looked up at the sky with him. He was standing out waist-deep in the water. He’d been in the middle of teaching Ren how to play ‘Marco Polo’ and just lost for the tenth time, Ren had an unfair advantage being able to dive underwater when they decided to stop.

“Then I’ll bring four! Two for each of us!”

“Sounds good, I’ll go fetch my pot and meet you on the beach.”

He turned and started to make his way back up to dry land when he noticed Ren hadn’t moved. The mermaid had now turned his head and was looking out at the ocean.

“Ren? Everything okay?”

“Oh, yes… Sorry, I just heard Futaba calling. She’s coming to the island.”

“Oh. Great.” Goro rolled his eyes, “I guess we’ll be feeding her too.”

“It would be courteous to have enough crabs for her as well.”

“Fine, but I’m not boiling her’s.”

Goro walked back over to the second island to retrieve his pot and filled it with water from the freshwater spring. He then returned to the beach and waited for the mermaids to join him.

Ren, along with Futaba surfaced up on the beach just as the sky was starting to turn red and orange from the setting sun.

“I’m back!” Futaba announced. “Did you miss me?” She opened her mouth wide to show Goro a toothy grin.

“I did not.”

Futaba made a grumbling noise as Ren came up behind her laughing, “Come on, Goro, she helped me catch a lot of crabs!”

Futaba did dump a small pile of crustaceans on the beach. At least they would have a good dinner. Goro grabbed a few and tossed them into his pot before positioning it over the fire.

“Ren told me you two had a pretty good day,” she watched Goro work. “So, have you decided what you’re going to do when time’s up?”

“Not really.” Goro didn’t look away from the fire when he answered.

“I figured as much,” she said it so matter of factly Goro wanted to tell her to get lost. “That’s why I asked my mom about you. And she offered a solution.”

“I’m not letting your mom experiment on me,” Goro turned to her this time.

“Relax, she doesn’t want that… Sort of.”

“Sort of?” Ren moved closer to Futaba. “What does she want?”

Futaba picked up one of the uncooked crabs and used her tentacles to crack one of its legs off. “So, I told Mom about your human… She said he’s suffering from a thing called ‘depression’.”

“Wow, tell me something I didn’t already know,” Goro shook his head.

“Shush you! This part is for Ren!” Futaba raised the crab leg to her lips and sucked out the raw meat and juices before tossing the empty shell into the fire. “She’s had a few human brains that have depression infected in them.”

“Infected?” Ren asked. “Like a poison? Like something gave it to Goro?”

“That’s not how it works,” Goro commented.

“No, nothing bit him or anything like that… Some humans just have broken brains, Mom says. The little nerves in your head that make you think good things don’t work. She’s noticed this when studying them and parts of their brain don’t light up. Found out it was called depression by picking through their memories.”

“Did she see a way to fix it?”

“Yes!” Ren perked up at her answer, “But it takes longer than seven days.”

“Oh…” Goro watched as a pensive look came over Ren’s face.

“But! She offered a solution. Away for you and Goro to work on his depression for a long time.”

“I only agreed to seven days,” Goro interrupted. Not that he was sure he’d keep to that timeline. But he did know he had to do something if he was going to be on this island for a long time. “But let’s hear it anyway.”

“Mom’s offering to make Goro into one of us.” Futaba snapped another crab leg off.

“One of us!?” Ren leaned closer to her shocked.

“Wait? Into a mermaid?” Goro now turned and got down on one knee so he was eye level with Futaba. “She can do that?”

“Sure she can!” The girl ate her next leg and casually tossed it into the flames. “She can do a lot with magic. She figures if you’re a mermaid, the humans can’t find you, and you and Ren will have plenty of time to make you not depressed anymore.”

“Futaba that’s wonderful news!” Ren clapped his hands together. “That fixes all our problems!”

“…A mermaid… me?” Goro looked back and forth between the two. That would buy him time. Shido could never find him. Hell, he’d never have to go home… “What’s the catch?”

“Catch?” Ren looked at him. “What do you mean?”

“What do I have to exchange?” Goro peered at Futaba, staring intently at her as she ate.

“Well, technically… To change your whole body, you’re whole species is a lot of magic. Mom is basically changing your whole life.”

“You’re not answering me. What do I have to exchange?”

“It has to be equal… So, for a new life, you have to give up your old one.”

“His old one?” Ren shook his head, “What does that even mean?”

“His memories of being a human.”

“No,” Goro answered immediately. The two mermaids turned to him. “I won’t do it.”

“But, Goro, you don’t even like your current life.” Ren pointed out.

“Yeah, you came out here to die. It’s not like you’re enjoying the memories now?”

“If you’re a mermaid, you could stay here with me! You’re enjoying this! You could be happy.”

“At the cost of my memories?” He scoffed, “Are you both insane? I’m not giving you, or your crazy sea-witch mother my memories!”

“Stop calling my mom a ‘sea-witch’!”

“She is!”

“Guys, please don’t start yelling again…” Ren grimaced, fearing he’d have to break them up again.

“What is wrong with you!?” Futaba did not stop yelling. “I’m offering you the perfect solution.”

“It is not perfect! It's terrible! I have to give up my memories to be happy! I’d rather be dead!”

“Goro, please,” Ren pleaded, “You said you wouldn’t yell anymore.”

“Fine then be dead!” Futaba tossed what was left of her crab at him. Goro raised his arms to block it from hitting him in the face. “You think you can just stay here and exploit Ren’s kindness! Either the humans are going to find you and drag you away, or they won’t and you’ll eventually die out here on this island!”

“Futaba, don’t make it worse.”

“I would rather die on this fucking island than not remember my own life!” Goro got up and pointed at her, “You and your mother are scum! You offer solutions, and just steal from people the things they need! The things that make them happy!”

Futaba’s entire body started rolling between colorations of black and green. “Why you- forget it! I’m taking back the offer!”

“Futaba-”

“No, Ren!” She turned to him, “Forget this human! Just swim away and let him die here! He doesn’t care about anyone other than himself!” She started to crawl away toward the ocean. Ren called after her, but Futaba didn’t stop.

Eventually, she was completely underwater and gone.

“Goro…” Ren turned back to him. “Why?”

Goro stood with his fist clenched at his sides glaring out at the ocean.

“Ren… I can’t. I don’t want to forget her.”

“Her…? Your mother?”

Goro nodded. He could feel his eyes misting over with tears, but he did his best not to cry. “I don’t- I don’t want to give her up. All of this… The entire point was I wanted to be with her.”

“Goro,” Ren spoke softly. He moved closer to him and reached up to take his hand. “Goro she’s dead. Don’t you think she’d want you to be alive? She wanted you to be happy.”

“But to forget her? As if she was never there? As if our time together never happened? It’s the only happy thing I’ve ever had in my whole life.”

“…The only thing?”

Goro finally looked down at Ren. A few of his tears fell and landed on their joined hands.

Ren looked up at him, eyes wide as he tried to offer a comforting smile.

Goro felt his lips tremble.

“Yes. The only thing.”

Ren continued to hold Goro’s hand, but his smile steadily faded. It was replaced with a grimaced and hurt expression. Goro tore his hand away.

“I’m sorry…” He muttered as he walked around Ren, and past the fire and picked up his mother’s picture.

He charged ahead with his head down, until he made it back to his camp on the other island and curled up into a ball to try and sleep.

There was no singing that night.

Chapter Text

Goro slept like shit.

He spent all night tossing and turning and he wasn’t sure if that was because he had hardly eaten in the past two days, because he kept waking up to sob, or because there was no music to lull him to sleep.

He wasn’t even sure what day it was. But he knew his last day was approaching.

He’d turned down the one long term solution he possibly had.

Goro reached out and picked up his picture from where he had set down. He’d been staring at it each time he woke up.

“Mom… What can I do?” Goro pressed the picture to his forehead. “I want to be happy… But I don’t want to be without you…”

At some point, Goro had fallen asleep again in that position. He only woke up again when he heard voices.

Human voices.

He sat up in a cold sweat. Why did he hear people?

Goro slowly got up and crept over to the edge of the island and peeked up from the trees. Close by he could see the rescue vessel and a small search boat with a few men making their way from it to the island.

“Fuck!” He hissed and backed up from view. “Fuck. Fuck! Why are they here? I thought Ren was keeping them away!” Goro turned around in place.

Ren.

He hadn’t heard Ren singing last night. Or this morning. Had he left him?

He couldn’t blame him.

He really did ruin this, didn’t he?

Goro’s eyes flicked around the island as his panic quickly grew. There was no place to hide here. There was nothing he could do other than try to leave. He grabbed his mother’s photo and started to hurry to the other side of the island.

Maybe he could swim for it?

But swim to where? There was nothing around? And it's not like he had the stamina to just wait them out in the ocean.

Goro stopped at the edge of the island and looked out at the water.

“Ren?” He practically whispered the mermaid’s name, fearful he’d be heard. “Ren are you still here?”

Goro carefully slid down the slope and into the water so his body didn’t make a splash.

“Ren, please?” He bit his lip and looked over the water’s surface.

There was nothing.

No movement. No sound.

“Fuck.” Goro shook his head. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He guessed this was it then.

With his eyes closed, he pushed off the side of the island and made it about a foot before he collided with a body. Goro let out a cry of shock and opened his eyes to find Ren just as surprised.

“Goro!” He whispered, “Where are you going?”

“Ren!” Goro wrapped his arms around the mermaid’s neck, “You’re here! We have to leave!”

“Leave?” Ren returned the embrace, confused. “Why? If they find you, you can go home-”

“No, Ren, know I don’t want that!”

“But you don’t want to be here either…” Ren pulled back and looked at him confused. “Goro, go back to the humans.”

“Ren, no…” He shook his head several times.

“You’re not happy here.”

“I’m not happy there either!”

“But I failed you… Just like I failed my family.”

Goro took a deep breath and clung to Ren, “You didn’t fail me. I’m failing me! Listen… You can’t fix me. But that’s not your fault!” He gently shook Ren’s shoulders. “I might not be perfectly happy here, but I swear to you, this is better than anything I’ve ever had on the mainland!”

“...Really?”

“Yes!” Goro smiled, as nervous as he was, “That much I can tell you. I don’t want to go back. I don’t want to be my father’s puppet. I don’t want to drown myself in alcohol and drugs and sex and parties… I don’t want to go! So, will you help me hide?”

Ren bit his bottom lip as he thought.

However, those thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of the rescue party calling out that they had found something.

Ren and Goro exchanged fervent looks before the mermaid pulled Goro forward to wrap his arms around him. Ren turned around so Goro was clinging to his back, and started to swim away from the island as quickly as he could.

Goro kept his arms wrapped around Ren’s shoulders and a tight grip on his photograph. Occasionally he looked back to make sure they hadn’t been seen and that no one was following them. Slowly the island faded from view as Ren seemed to swim without a clear destination.

“Are you cold?” Ren asked after a while. He’d stopped swimming as fast a long time after the islands had vanished from view. He was slowly circling around in the waters, and Goro wasn’t sure how long it had been, but he was starting to shiver.

“A little bit…We’ve been out here a while.” He still clung to Ren, but his arms were getting tired.

“I can roll over onto my back and you can lie on me again.”

“That might work.” Goro had to loosen his grip a bit as Ren turned in place. He put his hands one Goro’s hips and helped him steady himself as he flipped over.

Goro found himself pressing his cheek against Ren’s shoulder. He slid his picture between their bodies and used the mermaid as a floatation device.

“Are you not tired?”

“A little… But this also makes it easier for me.”

“I see…” Goro sighed. His limbs were still dangling in the water, but at least most of his body was out now.

“I’m sorry I’m not bigger,” Ren casually drifted along on the ocean’s surface. “If I was Ryuji’s size, all of you could be out of the water.”

“Are you really that small?” Goro questioned him. “You’re bigger than an average human.”

Ren’s tail flicked, “I told you I’m a runt. I did end up growing to be a decent size, but everyone in the area is still bigger than me. Ryuji is much bulkier, that’s why he’s charged himself with keeping dangerous predators out of our waters. Ann and Shiho have got such long beautiful tails. Yuuki is pretty close to my size, but even he’s a bit longer than I am. Futaba is the only one smaller than me and she’s still growing.”

“I see…” Goro closed his eyes. “Well, I think you’re just the right size.”

Ren chuckled and reached up to comb his claws through Goro’s hair.

“…I’m sorry about last night,” Goro mumbled. “I’m sorry dealing with me is such a hassle.”

“It’s okay.”

“It is not.” Ren didn’t respond. “You do too much for me. And every time I do nothing for you. I’m really sorry, Ren. I know that probably seems hollow… But I am sorry.”

“…Are you still going to kill yourself?”

“…I don’t know. If I do, you don’t have to help me. I know you don’t want me to die.”

Ren let out a low hum in response. The two drifted in silence for a while after that.

Eventually, Ren started singing softly as he ran his fingers through Goro’s har and over his scalp.

“We never did make a song together.”

“We could do it right now. We have time to kill while we wait for the humans to leave.”

Goro slightly lifted his head, “How should we do it then? You make a tune and I make the words?”

“Words in human would be best. That way we both understand the song.”

“Alright…” Ren’s tail swished under the water with a bit of excitement, propelling them a bit faster. The mermaid started singing his tune and Goro just listened at first. Again, the melody sounded slightly different, but it was a song, for sure. Not like noise as Futaba and Ren described it.

“Are you going to start?” Ren stopped singing after a few minutes to question him.

“Oh, yes, I guess I’m just trying to get a feel for it. For where it starts and where it loops…”

“I see.  I’ll start again.” Ren started up the song once more.

Was it the same? Goro closed his eyes, maybe it didn’t sound the same to his ears, but it felt the same. The same lonely song he’d been listening to all week.

“Hmn… I’m alone?” Goro pressed his cheek back down to Ren’s chest. “I’m drifting alone on the ocean. Just me and my tune. I’m searching the seas… Searching for-”

“You.” Ren interrupted him.

“Hmn?” Goro looked up.

“I’m searching the seas for you. In sunlight, by moonlight. To the north and the south-”

“Oh, you’re adding on…” Goro muttered… “Ah, I’ve looked under every wave, but you’re nowhere to be found.”

“Really?” Ren frowned.

“What it fits?”

The mermaid whistled and flicked his tail. “Then- You’re searching the ocean! You’re looking for me! The one also alone, in this big empty sea!”

“I’ve got nothing and no one, for miles all around.”

“So it makes sense that it’s you that I’ve found.”

“We’re alone together, in miles of blue sea. Just the two of us adrift, for as far as anyone can see.”

“Sea and see? Is that all you’ve got-”

“Don’t be so picky!”

“It might not seem natural, it might seem odd, but when I’m drifting with you I don’t feel so lost.”

“We’re swimming together, now, across every wave-”

“Under the sun, under the moon-”

“And with each passing day. I’m swimming the ocean, with you and my song-”

“I think this is what I’ve been looking for all along.”

“We’re alone in the ocean. Just us and our song.”

“Huh,” Goro  folded his hands under his chin and looked up at Ren, “Is that what you’ve been singing?”

“…Close enough. There’s no other person in it.” Ren reached up and scratched his claws through Goro’s hair, “But I like this new version. I’ll sing it from now on.”

“Oh great, now everyone really won’t know what you’re saying.”

Ren started to laugh. His merriment causing him to splash his tail and cover them both with water. Goro insisted he stop and when he didn’t he reached out to start splashing the fish in the face.

They didn’t return to the island until sunset.

By then the rescue party was gone, but it was clear they had picked over the island. They’d taken Goro’s little pot- probably for proof he had been there but left the fires burning. Their footprints were all over the beach, and they’d hacked through several of the smaller plants investigating the area.

“They’ll probably come back… Since they saw someone was living here…” Goro stood on the beach next to his fire.

“We could go into the sea and avoid them again,” Ren was at his feet. They were both staring into the fire.

“You know that’s only going to work for so long… If they come back with a helicopter, they’ll spot us. Meaning they’ll see you.”

“…So then…?” Ren never finished his question.

Goro stood still for a long time before turning away from the fire to sit down on the sand next to the mermaid. He reached out his hand to Ren who took it immediately. Goro pulled him forward gave him a hug.

“I’m sorry I lied to you.”

“Lied to me? About what?”

“About the fact you could maybe help me… And that I’ve never been happy here.” Goro pulled back. “I want you to know, this has been the best week of my life since I was a kid.”

“Goro…” Ren tried to smile, but Goro was sure he was crying. It was hard to tell since his face was naturally wet from seawater. “We still have a few days. I can hide you… Maybe they’ll give up-”

“Ren,” Goro cut him off, and put his fingers to Ren’s lips to stop him from talking, “They’re going to go back and tell my dad I was here. And he’s not going to stop in a few days. Those people may be back to your island and around these waters for weeks… Me staying here isn’t just impossible, it’s going to put you in danger. I’m sorry… I can’t stay.”

Ren hesitated before reaching up to gently remove Goro’s hand, “I’m going to miss you. I- I don’t know what to do now?”

“Just keep helping your friends. Eventually, you’ll find someone that can understand you.” Ren nodded. Goro looked back at the fire, “I’ll put these out so your islands don’t burn down-”

“You can leave the one on the beach.” Ren insisted. “It's far away enough from the trees that they’ll be fine and I- I like looking at it. Let it die out on its own.”

“Okay…” Goro cleared his throat. “I- I’m also going to give this to you.” Goro held out his picture of his mother and him.

“Really? Why? You wanted her so badly-”

“I’m going to be with the real thing soon enough. I just, want you to have it. I’m in the picture too, even though I’m really small.”

Ren reached forward and took the photo. Goro noticed how much his hands were shaking. While Ren looked down at it Goro leaned forward and kissed his forehead again. Ren looked up and smiled.

“I’m not going to go until morning, so, let’s just stay here until we fall asleep?”

“Okay.”

Goro laid back in the sand and put his hands behind his head. As he looked up at the night sky Ren laid down next to him, but let his head rest on Goro’s chest.

“Do dead people you care about wait for you until you die too?”

“…I like to think so.”

“So then, when I die, will I see you again?”

“I want to hope so.”

“Then, I’ll make sure to sing when I die, so you can find me.”

“Sounds good.” Goro pulled one hand out from behind his head and ran his hands through Ren’s tangled hair.

Neither Ren nor Goro fell asleep that night. Both just lay in silence, occasionally trading off humming their new song together.

Chapter Text

Goro laid still for as long as possible once he realized the sun was coming up.

He knew Ren was awake because he felt the mermaid shift the moment the first signs of dawn became visible.

Morning felt like it had come so quickly.

Once most of the night sky had been pushed back by the sun’s light Goro openly sighed.

“Ren. It’s morning.”

“It’s not morning if you keep your eyes closed.”

Goro smirked and chocked on a dry chuckle. Days ago, that answer would have bothered him. But right now, he almost felt like telling Ren he was right. Still, he felt the mermaid push off his chest and allowing him to sit up.

Ren was looking at him, with the most, weak and pathetic smile he could muster. And yet he still looked a bit happy. Goro felt his chest constrict and for a moment all his thoughts paused. He smiled so much like his mother on his birthday. Doing her best to be happy in the face of the inevitable.

“…I want you to be happy.” Goro whispered.

“I am. I promise.”

He nodded stiffly and then looked around the beach like he was searching for something.

“You should… Probably swim away. I don’t want you to be here. I- you shouldn’t have to see or deal with what’s left of me.” He finally looked up at Ren. It was clear now he was crying since his face had dried off during the evening, the new streaks of water were clearly tears. “I’m sure Futaba will find my body and drag me down to her mother.”

“Yes, I think she will too…” Ren took a deep breath. He leaned forward and gave Goro a kiss on the cheek.

“What was that for?”

“You said they were for goodbyes?”

“Oh…I did, didn’t I?” Goro sat still for a long time before leaning forward and returning the gesture. “Goodbye, Ren.”

Ren offered him one more wide smile before collecting the picture and turning to slowly head back into the water. Goro watched him, and every now and again Ren would turn back and look. Soon he was just a head glancing back at Goro. And eventually, he was gone completely.

Goro stared out at the empty waves as if waiting for something before he opened his mouth to gasp and cry.

“I’m going to die.”

Goro didn’t move from the beach for some time. He had pulled his legs up to his chest and put his head down and cried for a long time; until he practically felt exhausted. By the time he lifted his head the sun was high in the sky, it had to be close to noon.

He couldn’t sit here forever. Soon the search team would be back.

He had to leave.

It was time.

The moment he’d waited twelve years and several days for.

Goro forced himself to stand up and stared out across the ocean. As if he was expecting to see Ren’s head pop up from the waves and stare at him from a distance like the first time they met. It was only recently, but already the memory gave him such a nostalgic feeling.

“I shouldn’t swim this way,” he whispered out into the open air.

He wouldn’t chase after Ren, out of fear his body would be drifting in the mermaid’s way when he came home. He turned and started marching across the island to the opposite side of the beach. He pushed his way through the trees and the bushes until he exited out the other side.

Back out to where the trees dangled over shallow water. Where he had splashed Ren with his legs to drown out his memories of stealing cars and his former best friend.

Goro looked out into the water and rubbed his hands with his face.

“This shouldn’t be that hard. I just did it not that long ago. I just… Need to go. I need to let go. I need to focus on seeing my mother, and nothing else.”

Goro clenched his fist at his side and stared out at the sea. He tried to think about his mother, but the only thing that came back to him were thoughts about his father. His cold stare, his cruel words. There wasn’t an once of affection in all of Shido. He never understood. He never cared. Goro was just an extension of his plans, not a person but a tool. Did he even miss him, now that he had been gone for a week?

“Do you even miss her?”

Goro sat still in a stuffy white suit, to stiff for a thirteen-year-old, in a fancy restaurant filled with men and women all having conversations that were over his head. His chair was hard. His food was too rich. And there wasn’t another child in the entire establishment. The air was filled with the sounds of wine glasses, stuffy chitchat, and violins. He wanted to go home. But he had to be here for his father to show him off to his political peers.

They’d spent the first part of dinner just walking around tables, meeting the other members of his father’s party. They’d rented out the entire restaurant for the night. Shido had given Goro a list of answers to memorize. General statements to show he had a ‘head for politics’ and would be perusing it as a career.

“Do I miss who?” Shido barely looked up from his meal.

“Mom,” Goro frowned. “It's her birthday this month… I wanted to celebrate.”

“Celebrate?” Shido looked up at him now. “We don’t hold parties for the dead.”

“We could hold a remembrance party? Or dinner? Something?” Goro clutched at his knees under the table.

“No. I’m far to busy this month. I have a political rally to attend every week for the next two weeks. Interviews, and you’re going off to your new school next week-”

“I don’t want to go to that school.” Goro hissed.

“Well after that incident last semester you have to.” Shido glared at him from over his glasses. “And I expect a better performance in your grades. And no inappropriate behavior. You're costing me hand over fist in finances to move you every semester. Keep it up and you’ll have a private tutor at home where you can be watched around the clock.”

Goro bit his bottom lip and looked down at his plate.

He listened to the sounds of the guest around the restaurant chatting and eating. Eventually, Shido realized Goro was sitting still.

“Eat your meal.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“I didn’t ask if you were hungry, I told you to eat.”

Goro blinked a few times as his frustration grew. “I would rather starve.”

“What was that?”

“I said I would rather starve.” He looked up at Shido, glaring as hard as he could. He did everything he could to keep his face from breaking into tears.

“Fine,” he watched his father flag down a waiter and instructed him to take the plate and Goro’s drink away. The man did so without hesitation, but he glanced at Goro confused. Shido shrugged his shoulders slightly and resumed eating in absolute silence.

Goro kept his fist balled up under the table and lowered his head.

“Don’t you dare cry in public,” Shido told him. “You’re a man. Sit up straight and look ahead. For every tear that falls, you’ll regret it when we get home.”

Goro felt his arms and legs shaking as he looked up again, “I’m going to die.” Shido paused and stared at Goro with indifference. “Just to spite you.”

Goro sat up straight, and let his tears fall, “I’m going to die.”

It was easy to consider his own death when Goro focused on how much he hated his father.

His feet carried him out into the water with angry hastened steps. He wouldn’t let his mind focus on Ren, or his mother, or his friend. He’d focus on Shido. He was the reason he had to do this. His death would be satisfying for that reason alone if nothing else. To spite his horrible father…

Goro made it out to waist-deep water and his chest felt tight.

If nothing else… Was there nothing else?

He felt he waves gently push against his body, nudging him forward and back.

Was it really all just out of spite?

He found himself loosing motivation again. Questions of why he had to die came rushing back as soon as he started to think about other things. About other people.

Goro put his hands on his head and screamed.

“Why is this so hard!” He slammed his hands into the water. “I came so close twice! Why! Why now can’t I do it!?”

He put his hands over his face and questioned what he was going to do. He needed to do something. He couldn’t just stay here.

Goro dragged his hands down his face, as the ocean came back into the view he was greeted with Futaba’s face just inches away from his. He jumped back screaming and she did the same. Their shouting lasted a much shorter amount of time, however. Goro smacked his hands against the water angrily.

“What’s wrong with you!? Why do you keep doing that!?”

Futaba mocked him smacking her tentacles on the water’s surface, “I don’t know!? Why do you keep doing it!?”

“Ugh, Futaba, can you go away? I’m trying to drown myself here.”

“I’ve noticed!” She started to swim circles around him. “I’m waiting for you to do it so I can take your body to Mom. Fresh brains are rare, so we can’t let you go to waste.”

“Ugh, great. My body is being donated to mermaid medical science.”

“So when are you going to do it?” She kept circling him.

“I don’t know… Soon.”

“Why don’t you do it now?”

“I don’t know.” Goro tried not to follow her as she moved. Instead, he held still, keeping his arms crossed in the water.

“Are you afraid?”

“I don’t know.”

“Are you… having second thoughts?”

“What part of ‘I don’t know’ is so hard for you to understand?”

“Do you… Maybe not want to do it?”

“Futaba!” He snapped at her and turned around in the water. “Is there a point to all of this!?”

She stopped swimming. Futaba looked at him, all the mischief had gone from her expression. “Ren’s going to miss you.”

“I know.”

“You don’t even really want to leave him. I heard you two out in the ocean yesterday.”

“Oh…” Goro looked away from her almost embarrassed. “It was just a song.”

“You don’t sing your song with someone else. Not unless they are very important to you. Ren is never going to sing that song again, you know. No one else can understand him.”

“Why are you putting this on me? I didn’t take his song, you did!”

“Yeah… But you gave him a new one.” Futaba frowned at him. “Is it really that scary, the idea of a new life? You don’t even like your current one.”

Goro looked down away from her. In the water, he thought he saw Shido’s face staring up at him. But as the waves rolled off his chest his image became distorted. The clear jawline was much softer, his hair looked longer, his frown almost like a smile…

“Is it really worth it to die, just make someone unhappy? When you could live and be happy with someone else? And be happy for yourself?”

Goro looked up at her, “But I’m going to forget. My mother… And what if I forget him? Forget Ren?”

“Impossible.”

“But my memories-”

“It's only the memories in your head, not in your heart, stupid.” She reached up and pat his skull with one of her tentacles. “So, are you going to die out of spite?”

Goro slowly shook his head. “No. No, I don’t want to die for Shido. I want to live for Ren!”

“Great!” Futaba splashed under the water and Goro looked around for her. She popped back up a few feet away from him. “Swim this way!”

“I have to swim there?”

“Of course you do! You turned the offer down before. So now you have to work for it.”

“What? Really?” Goro started to swim after her.

“Yes really! I told you it only works if you’re willing! Prove you want it!”

“How far do I have to go?”

“Pretty far!” Futaba swam ahead of him. Occasionally she ducked down under the water and reappeared further away. “You may even drown before we get there.”

“W-what!?” Goro stopped swimming and started to tread water. “If that’s the case why go!?”

“Why not go?” Futaba stopped far away from him. Her body was bobbing back and forth. “Either you’ll make it and succeed. Or you’ll fail and die-”

“But Ren-”

“Is expecting you to die anyway!” Futaba dove under the water.

Goro took several deep breaths and looked around searching for her. He turned around to look over his shoulder. He could still see the islands. He could swim back-

“Don’t go back!” He turned his head around to see Futaba waving at him. “Come this way!”

Goro swallowed hard and started to swim toward her. She continued to move away from him, just frustrating him further.

“Futaba!” He shouted at her over the waves as they started to splash up into his face. “Futaba! Can’t you help me!”

“No!” She sounded far away. Goro stopped and looked around again. The waves were now freely tossing his body this way and that. He couldn’t see Ren’s islands. He couldn’t have swum that far already?

“Futaba where are you?”

“Over here, Goro!” He heard a splashing sound back the opposite way. But when he looked back there was just open water. His heart was racing.

“Why can’t you help me!?”

“You have to want it! You have to try on your own!”

Goro cursed and started swimming towards the sound of her voice.

“What if I drown!?” Goro screamed after her.

“Just keep swimming!” He heard Futaba, but he couldn’t see her.

The waves seemed rougher the further out into the open sea he went.

It was cold. The waves kept smacking him in the face. His arms were getting tired. He was starting to shiver.

He stopped and looked around.

The clouds had all gathered overhead, and the sun was peaking through them. The sky was dark blue and the sea around him was even darker. There was no sign of his guide.

“Futaba!” Goro heard what sounded like her voice way off in the distance. But he couldn’t tell which direction. “Futaba, come back!”

If she responded he didn’t hear her.

This was stupid. She’d lead him out to sea to die.

Goro picked a direction and started swimming. Maybe he could make it back. Maybe he could make it back to Ren.

Every stroke he took was painful. The cold water was making it hard to breathe. He felt himself gasping as one arm splashed forward and his legs kicked tirelessly.

No one called out for him to follow.

The saltwater was stinging his eyes now. He wasn't sure if he was crying from exhaustion, frustration or fear.

The clouds all crowded together and the sun became like a bright orange beacon before him. It had lowered down to hover just above sea level. It’s like shining like a lighthouse through the clouds.

How had it gotten so low? Had he swum for that long?

It felt like he just started.

But he was so tired it could have been forever.

He squeezed his eyes and kept swimming. If he came this far, he could make it back to Ren.

He sawm blindly until he felt a tug. Like his entire body was jerked backward.

Goro opened his eyes and gasped. The clouds overhead had turned dark blue and waves around him were thrashing now. The sun still shone ahead. Hanging just above the now turbulent water.

Had a storm rolled in? How did he not see it?

The sea tossed him, and a wave came up and over his head. Goro struggled as he tried to turn himself upright and come back out through the surface.

As his head broke through the waves the clouds swirled around the sunlight, circling it in a strange pattern. The entire sea was a violent, dark blue mass. Tossing and churning around him.

“F-Futaba!” Goro screamed and whipped his head around just in time to be hit with another wave. It rolled over him and dragged him down. He fought to swim against it. But the wave dragged him into a strange current.

Goro’s head burst out from the side of a wave and he saw the clouds around the sun all had a bright fiery pink color. Outstretched from them they turned hues of yellow, orange, blue and black. They bled into the dark blue sea. And the waves were circling around each other, dragging Goro towards an undetermined center. Away from that bright sunlight.

“Futaba!”

Goro thought he heard a noise. Not someone calling back to him. But the faint echo of a song.

Goro tried to fight back against the current, but it was dragging him down. He desperately tried to swim towards the light. Out of the churning water. “Come back!”

Another jerk of the current sucked him into the water and the salt of the sea started to burn his lungs. His nostrils, his mouth, his eyes all felt like fire. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. But his sound only came out as gurgled bubbles until his head emerged again.

The song felt closer now. He knew it. He recognized it.

“Ren!” He didn’t try for Futaba this time. He had to get back to the island.

Goro stretched out his hand into the water trying to fight it and felt something trash against his touch just under the waves.

He did his best to turn around in place and could see a shadow under the water. It was swimming just under him, and all around. It was huge, long, and twisting and turning in spirals with the current. He followed the shadow as it circled the sea. Around and around him it went, flowing with the current, making the current.

His heart skipped a beat and he tried to swim faster.

He just wanted out. He just wanted to get back to that island. Back to Ren and his foolish optimism. And his stupid misunderstandings of humans. And his lonely, haunting song.

“Ren!” Goro felt himself moving up through the waves, fighting against being dragged down. He felt more like he was clawing at a mountain than swimming in the sea.

Up above all the clouds spiraled around the light. Just above the water. Just in the distance. Just beyond his reach.

But he knew he could make it if he just tried.

He had to try.

Goro’s body screamed at him to stop. Breathing was a challenge. His every muscle ached. Even if he made it out of this whirlpool he’d be dead in the water from exhaustion. But he kept swimming up.

Every now and again he’d feel it brush against his legs. The thing in the water with him. He’d see its shadow swim past him. He swore sometimes he saw it turn and look up at him from the depths, four wide eyes reflecting the spiraling light overhead. 

But Goro kept swimming.

And just as it seemed like he’d reached the top, and the light was within his grasp, something breached the top of the waves.

Goro’s heart stopped and he let out a scream as a large white tentacle tore its way up through the water. He wanted to move out of its way but couldn’t. It splashed down on top of him, dragging him back down into the water. Pulling him too far down into the current to make it out.

His body was dragged around in the circle. Head over heels, he tumbled in the water. He felt his limbs being yanked around by the current and the seawater filling his lungs. He could barely look out and see the large shadow circling around him. It’s body now lighting up with flashes along its spine and across eight long appendages. Along with it, he saw a smaller shadow, giving off a similar light circling with it.

His eyes drifted upward, he could still see the light, now overhead. Shining down into the whirlpool while the cool seawater numbed his body and his mind.

Ren’s song echoed in his head.

Goro found himself mesmerized by it. Maybe it was its glow, or maybe the cold water of the ocean, but he couldn’t feel his body anymore. He couldn’t feel himself trying to move.

Or maybe the current had just broken every bone in him.

“Goro.”

In her darkened hospital room his mother sat holding out a tiny plate with one large cupcake on it. It shook slightly in her boney hands.

The staff had turned out the lights and shut the curtains so only the light of the candle on top filled the room. It shined between them, drawing his eyes to it. The big number six candle with black and white stripes. The smoke rising up off of it in little clouds. The white vanilla frosting swirled atop a strawberry cupcake.

Someone was singing a song in the background. Not a birthday song.

A lonely one.

“Happy birthday, Goro.” His mother held it out to him with trembling hands.

Goro leaned forward on the edge of her hospital bed, a large smile across his face.

He’d waited all year for this day. He knew just what he wanted to wish for.

He looked up at her, to see her smiling at him. Her face was hidden just behind the light, just beyond him.

“Aren’t you going to wish?”

“I am!” Goro took a deep breath. The air in the hospital room felt cold and salty in his lungs.

“…May I wish too?” His mother stopped him before he could blow the candle out.

“You’re going to make a wish on my birthday?” Goro blinked a few times confused.

“If that’s alright?” His mother chuckled. Her laughter in tune with the song filling the room.

Goro stared at the candle, its light flickered as a large shadow passed over it.

“Well, I’m six… so I think that means I’ve got at least six wishes in the candle. So, you can have one.”

“Good.” His mother leaned forward. “Then I wish for you to be happy.”

Goro laughed, “I am happy, Mom! You’re here! And we get to have this cupcake! You should wish to better! That’s what I’m wishing for.”

“You are?”

“Yes!” He looked up to see her crying. “I’m going to wish that you're better. So that we can leave here. And things can go back to normal.”

“…And what if I don’t leave?”

“You will leave!” Goro pointed to the candle. His arms felt heavy as he tried to lift them. Weighed down by tons of cold, blue water. “I’ve been waiting to use my wish for you. So, we can be together. That’s why I’m happy.”

“I see…” The song was swelling, but Goro couldn’t understand the words. It was completely foreign, but he knew it so well.

Then, I know what I will wish for.” His mother held the cupcake out toward him. “I wish that you, find someone who makes you as happy as I do.” Goro twisted his lips. He didn’t understand the point of that wish. “I think you should wish for that too.”

“Why?”

“Because… Knowing that you’re happy, will make me happy.”

Goro waited for a moment and contemplated her idea. He wanted to wish for her to be better… But…

“Then I wish, that your wish comes true. And I’ll find someone that makes me as happy as you do.”

Goro reached out, trying to take the light in his hands. He opened his mouth and closed his eyes. But there was no more air in his lungs.

 The song came to an end.

And he blew out the light.

Chapter Text

It's that noise again.

Goro opened his eyes and peered around his room.

That same noise every night now for two weeks.

It stopped soon after he woke up, but he knew it would start up again.

He opened his mouth a few errant bubbles of air that had gotten trapped under his tongue released themselves. He stretched out his arms which had been folded up under his chin and swayed his tail about, pushing the water around him left and right. After a bit of stretching, he pushed off his bed. It was lumpy, but kind of soft. Wakaba had told him it was called a ‘mattress’ by humans. He liked it, but his tail was too long to fit on it with the rest of him.

From the top of his forehead two long, black and white striped extensions that had been folded back while he slept freed themselves from his hair. As soon as they were loose, they went to work illuminating the area around his face allowing him to get a better look at the room. He only knew it was called a room because Futaba had gone around teaching what all the rooms were called and how to read the signs.

There was a dining room, a mess hall, a ballroom, a playroom, a game room, a lounge, a bar, a theater, and bedrooms. He knew his was a bedroom. It had his lumpy mattress in it, a dresser where humans used to store clothing, and a few items scattered about he was still learning the names and purpose of.

Though he did enjoy the item called a mirror.

It hung up on the wall next to the doorway. He liked to swim up to each time he woke up or entered the room to examine himself. As if something in his brain was searching for something familiar. Something he was supposed to see in himself, but he didn’t quite know what.

Goro swam and stopped in front of the reflective glass. It had a few chips in its side, but overall it was whole. And long enough that he could see every inch of himself.

He was mostly black with some white. His long tail and lower body held most of the black and his upper body held most of the white. Where his body and tail met there were horizontal stripes of the white fading into the black and black rising up into the white. And they weren’t even, either. The black managed to work it’s way up to his chest, it even covered the lower half of his arms, leaving just his shoulders and up white, while the white quickly faded into the black.

The gradient was actually kind of hard to look at, making his body’s appearance somewhat disrupted and hard to make out. His fins were the same way covered in the messy black and white stripes, but they went no particular direction. Horizontal, vertical, diagonal. Even he felt that they sometimes changed patterns while he slept. The fins that grew out of his forearms were sharp, good for fighting off predators or gutting prey.

And the lights that he made were just as good for drawing in food as they were for lighting up the area.

Goro leaned into the mirror so close his antennae touched the cool glass. The lights started at the tip and traveled down into his hair. Right now it was a steady warm, golden color, but he could change it depending upon his mood- usually, the lights were red when Futaba was around mocking him.

He traced his reflection with one hand and ran his other through his chin-length brown hair.

What was he looking for? It wasn’t in his red eyes. It wasn’t in his hair. He knew it wasn’t in his tail or body, though sometimes he questioned his unusual pattern. It bothered him a bit how his two halves looked like two colorations mashed together. It was unnatural. Like he was molded, not made.

He dragged his finger along his chin and hummed at his reflection. He always lingered here the longest. Something about his jaw… Maybe it was connected to what he couldn’t remember? A memory he was looking for that was long faded from his mind but lingered in his heart.

From out in the distance the strange noise started over. At least he thought it started over. There had been a little break while he stared at himself before he started hearing it again. For all he knew it was a continuation, but he felt like it started over.

Goro pushed off of the mirror and swam towards his window. The glass had long since been broken out, allowing him to swim in and out of the rectangular opening. He stuck his head out and glanced around in the darkness.

His room was actually on a slant, as was the entire vessel that contained his room.

A ‘cruise ship’ Wakaba called it.

‘Lions Pride.’ Futaba had named it. Well, she said that’s what the human words on the side of the boat said.

Half broken and teetering a slope on the edge of the greater deep. A good shift in the earth could send it falling deeper, but as it was, it remained positioned on the edge of darkness. Still, too dark a place for any sunfish to dwell, but just good enough for ones like them, that could traverse between both. Goro turned his head trying to pinpoint the source of that sound.

It wasn’t that it bothered him. It just called to him. It was strange. He could almost swear it had a melody, but it was clearly just noise. Just an endless racket that started up each night for the past two weeks.

He pulled himself through his window and swam along the side of the boat, following up its slope past several unused rooms and up to the area that the signs had labeled a ‘deck’.

As he passed over the railing and started to swim towards the boat’s upper levels a voice called out to him.

“Out night prowling again, are we?”

Goro stopped swimming and turned around.

Futaba was stretched on the deck on one of the human things. A ‘pool chair’, he’s pretty sure it was called.

“I’m not night prowling,” He swam down to where she was lounging. “I’m going to ask Wakaba about that noise.”

“Noise?” Futaba tilted her head, “What noise?”

“Don’t play dumb.” Goro huffed. “I’m not in the mood.”

“No, I’m serious, what noise?” She glanced around. “Something coming up from the deep?”

“What! No!” Goro waved his hands around, “How do you not hear that . It’s been happening every night for two weeks!”

“Ohhh!” Futaba put her hands behind her head, “Yeah, I know what that noise is.”

“You do?” Goro swam around her so that he was behind her chair. He leaned over the back and stared at her face. “What is it?”

“Hmm… I don’t want to tell you.”

Goro frowned. As he did so the lights on his antennae turned a red glow. Futaba giggled at the sight.

“You’re always playing games… I’m going to go ask Wakaba.” He pushed off the chair and resumed swimming away.

“Mom’s busy! Can’t you wait until morning?”

“It stops in the morning! I want to know what it is now!”

Goro continued to swim away. He didn’t bother to look back and catch Futaba sitting upright to rest her chin in her hands and smile.

Wakaba’s room was in what was known as the ‘Captain’s Room’ and the ‘Bridge’. Usually, at this time of night, she was focused on reviewing her findings during her experiments. During the day she slept down in an area called the ‘Engine Room’. It was one of the few rooms big enough for her to comfortably stretch out in.

Goro swam into the upper halls through a hole in the ship's hull. Immediately he saw a long white tentacle sticking out of a doorway, the tip of it tapping against the floor.

“Wakaba?” Goro swam up to the door and stuck his head in. The room only had Wakaba’s tentacle sticking up through a hole in the floor. “Oh, she must be down one…”

He turned around and swam down the hall until there was a break in the floor for him to pass down through. Here he saw to more tentacles, their middle sections running across the hall between doorways.

“Wakaba!” He shouted. “Are you on this floor!?”

“At the end, Dear!” She responded back.

Goro swam down the hall and around a corner to the bridge. There used to be a set of double doors here, but they were now taken off and discarded in the hall. The entire room was aglow with several lights of various colors: soft pinks, blues, greens, whites. They were coming off of little glowing anemones that Wakaba had planted around the room. Their glowing lights were amplified by the all-glass walls encircling the room. The creatures all held something inside them. Things Wakaba had collected. Bits of information she harvested from the surface.

She could run her fingers through their waving tendrils, and the little shocks would come back to her as information obtained from human minds or even her own memories that she stored away to prevent them from fading.

As Goro entered the room he saw the main part of Wakaba’s body in the middle of the room. She was surrounded by her anemones here. They sprang up around her in a large circle, covering most of the floor. The rest of her- her long tentacles extended out over the room and through gaps in the floor. The various lights of her plants reflected off of her pale white skin, and where they touched her, the little shocks from their bodies caused her own luminescent cells to light up and flicker.

She was hunched over them, running her fingers through the tops of them, causing them to light up and various patterns. It was a sight to simply hover in the water and watch her talk to them. The flashing light show passing back and forth between them could be captivating.

Even hunched over, and sitting on the floor she was tall. Goro knew once she sat upright the top of her head would just barely clear the room.

As she poked around through her newly acquired knowledge, her two lower set of eyes stared ahead, completely blank and devoid of color. Above them her second set of eyes were closed, focusing on the things she was seeing in the anemones.

Goro was somewhat curious about the transfer process. Futaba had told him his mother would coil her tentacles around a human head and send surges of her own body’s electric charges through the nerves. It made the brains ‘alive’ for a moment, if only long enough for her process all their information. And then she’d transfer the patterns of the shocks into an empty anemone so that when she’d touch the plants, she’d receive the same info again and again. It was the only way to keep the info since eventually, the human body would rot away.

“Good evening, Wakaba,” Goro stopped just after the doorway. “Sorry if I’m interrupting you…”

“It’s alright, Dear.” Her head swayed to the side causing all her black hair to swirl around her face before settling again. Like her daughter she had a few smaller tentacles tangled up in her black locks. At the moment they hung limply around her head and down to her shoulders, past her chin-length hair. “It's just taking me a while to go through all these memories. Eighteen solid years…  I couldn’t ask for a better recovery. Nothing fractured or partial due to the sea degrading the mind before the transfer.”

“Are human minds really that interesting?”

“Have you no curiosities, Goro?” Wakaba pulled back from her stored memories and sat upright. Goro had to tilt his head back to look her in the face, not that she could see him do so. The black tentacles mixed into her hair lifted up to ensure she didn’t bump her head on the ceiling, reaching out to feel for the metal top before she could bump it. Once she was upright her second set of eyes opened. Unlike the bottom pair, they were black. Solid black. No distinction between pupil, iris or sclera.

“Well, yes… But,” Goro moved forward, making sure to stay above the anemone field. For Wakaba they felt like little shocks, to him they were numbing stings. “But not about things that don’t pertain to me. And certainly not humans! They’re dangerous. I’m mostly just curious about what I’ve forgotten?”

Wakaba’s body slowly changed from white to a soft golden orange and she let out a soothing sound that made the glass walls behind her shake. One of her tentacles worked its way back to the room to wrap around Goro’s middle and hold him.

“You were in a bad state when we found you on the ocean floor a month ago, Dear. That storm did a number on you… But I’m sure if there’s anyone out there looking for you, be it a pod or a partner, you’ll find them soon. You just have to listen they’ll call for you. I know they will.”

“Ah,” Goro ran his hands along Wakaba’s tentacle, his claws gently scratching at her skin, “Speaking of call… Wakaba, can you, tell me about that noise?”

“Noise?”

“The one that’s been happening each night? For the past fourteen days?”

“Oh, the song.”

“That’s a song!” Goro exclaimed and Wakaba chuckled.

“That’s Ren. He lives east of here, underneath two little islands.”

“That’s him singing?” Goro scrunched up his nose and his antennae started to give off a soft blue light, “It sounds strange. Like… He’s not singing anything? Why is he doing that?”

“Oh, he’s singing, alright. We just can’t understand him… Ren is curious about humans. He wanted to know their language, so I gave him the ability to speak it. But as such, his ability to speak long distances was taken from him. His nightly song, all his calls for others of our kind, reach our ears as nonsense.”

Another one of Wakaba’s tentacles reached up and tapped next to her eyes white eyes, “For just as I had to make a trade to see and keep memories, Ren had to make a trade.”

Goro frowned, ”So, he’s just going to sing forever? And no one will ever come?”

Wakaba let him go, “It seems like it.”

“That’s fool-“ He stopped midsentence and turned to look at Wakaba. He didn’t want to be rude. “It’s silly to sing when you know no one will come.”

“Maybe he thinks someone will come out of curiosity.”

“That’s highly unlikely.”

“Why not? You came to me out of curiosity?”

Goro started to respond and stopped. He folded his arms and Wakaba laughed at him. She reached out with her hands and took Goro’s arms into her palms. He looked down as her thumbs stroked over his fins. He by no means was a small fish. But Wakaba was so much bigger than him, that nearly his entire arm could fit in her hand. He’d always been told those in the deep could grow to sizes bigger than he’d seen, but he never actually saw anyone this large until he met Wakaba.

Goro didn’t live near the surface, but he wasn’t a deep-sea dweller either. His lights allowed him to dive down to some depths to find food, but he always came back up to where there the sunlight could reach him.

“Thank you for answering my questions, Wakaba.”

“Anytime, Dear. Are you going to go rest up now?” She let go of Goro’s arms.

“…No. I- I think I’ll go for a swim.”

“Have fun. And be careful.”

Goro thanked her again before turning out and swimming away. He exited the boat through a hole in the wall and started to swim upward. Down on the deck, Futaba was watching him swim away and inside Wakaba was poking at the memories of a boy who drowned himself over a month ago.

Goro kept swimming upward until there was enough moonlight that his antennae’s light was no longer needed. They natural rolled themselves back until they became tangled up in his hair again.

The ‘singing’ was louder now. That made sense. If Ren lived under a couple of islands he favored the surface and sunlight over the dusky and dark waters they lived in.

He turned around in the waves for a moment orienting himself before pinpointing east and swimming that direction.

As he sawm he found himself focusing on Ren’s confusing tune. Some part of him tried to sort out the words. He felt like they were on the tip of his tongue, but at the same time, he couldn’t say them.

“Why is a song, that isn’t even music familiar to me? Have I met Ren before?”

Goro lightly chewed on his lower lip as he swam. Nothing in his memory recalled someone named Ren. Then again, his memory recalled very little before the storm.

He woke up on the seafloor to Wakaba stroking his head, her tentacles wrapped around it actually, and asking him questions. He’d been tossed around in a violent storm and crashed onto the floor after being caught up in a whirlpool… His body was bruised up, his fins torn, and his head had a big knot on the back of it where he had struck something. But before the storm, he couldn’t really pinpoint anything else his life.

He knew he was on his own. He’d intentionally left his pod. But he didn’t know if they were looking for him. Something told him they weren’t.

He didn’t know what his destination was, or his origin. He just knew he was going… Somewhere. Somewhere he knew he was supposed to be.

Wakaba offered for him to live in her shipwreck until his memories returned and his body healed. He thought he’d only be a few days, but it had been a full month now. He wanted to leave right away, thinking that he should keep moving and his thoughts would come back to him- but the waters were swarming with humans.

Tons of boats for days… It would have been dangerous to swim around in open water with them lurking about, so he stayed put. Goro had no love for humans. Though he had no encounters with them, he never wanted to be close to one. The thought of it made him shudder. He was fearful if a human saw him they’d take him away. It was foolish, he knew that. But perhaps it was a leftover lesson from his days with his pod? Nevertheless, too many humans meant no traveling.

Actually, they had all been clustered eastward. Had they been around Ren’s island?

“That might explain why he only just started singing. But what were the humans doing around his island? And why the hell would you stay there… It’s so dangerous. Is he in idiot?”

Goro rolled over as he swam, “Why do I care if he is an idiot?” 

The singing was getting closer now. The ‘song’ had stopped and started a few times since he started making his way toward the islands. And even though the noise sounded worse the closer he came, he found himself swimming faster to reach the source. There was something about it. He couldn’t make out what it was about, or its purpose but he knew it’s intent.

“Lonely. It’s a lonely song… It sounds like it’s missing parts,” Goro looked down as he saw the ocean floor rising up. A sign he was approaching land. “How do I know it’s missing parts?” He questioned himself. But he was certain now there were gaps in the melody. Like someone else should be singing too.

Goro raised his head and could see the upward slope of sand, rocks, and coral rising up to breach out of the water. He’d arrived. He started to slow down and contemplated announcing himself.

But instead, he found himself poking around the island base. He could make out the traces where humans had been. There were bits of coral broken off, places where their hands and tools had carved up the ocean floor. Even little metal sticks with orange tags marked on them.

He knew what this was, for some reason. It was a sign they were looking for something.

“Ren probably had to live out in open water while they were here… That’s hard to do on your own…” Goro plucked up one of the little metal sticks. Why did he know this? Had Wakaba or Futaba spoken about it? They must have?

He turned his eyes up toward the surface and tossed it away as he swam around the island until he could see a beach.

Goro slowly pushed his head out of the water to make as little a splash as possible. He still wasn’t sure he wanted Ren to know he was there.

Once out of the water he could hear the mixed-up melody more clearly. Much to his dismay it was, even more, haunting out in the open air.

And to exacerbate his strange infatuation with the music the one making it was just as mesmerizing.

Maybe it was the moonlight? Or that he’d spent the past month with just an octopus and her eldritch mother to talk to. But there was something about the mermaid he saw on the beach that brought all his thoughts to a pause The red and black scales reflecting the dim glow of the moonlight, his messy black hair tangled up with little shells, his long slender tail casually moving up and down in rhythm to his song… He had his back to Goro, and his head was down so he could see his face but…

It caused a knot to form around Goro’s heart.

He knew this.

He’d never seen him before but he knew this. His entire body tingled with familiarity and his heart started to race from adrenaline. But no memories came. Just this feeling. Just this overwhelming feeling to swim up onto the beach and talk to him.

And luckily for him, his body was determined to act on that feeling before his brain could process what he was doing.

Goro dove forward and with a few hefty pushes of his tail swam for the beach and broke the surface of the water again, “Hello!”

The moment he spoke out Ren stopped singing. He stiffened up and quickly turned around to stare at Goro as he pulled himself out of the water. When their eyes met Goro stopped for a moment, taking in Ren’s startled expression and golden eyes. He did his best to slow down as he came up onto the sands, trying not to seem too enthusiastic to meet this stranger.

“Hi,” Goro said again. For some reason he was breathless. He couldn’t stop his lungs from gasping for air. He was sure he looked ridiculous with his gills flapping so much… He really wished he didn’t.

Ren didn’t say anything. In fact, he backed up, still eyeing Goro. He had something held tight in his hands, some little, flat colored square. Upon closer inspection, Goro could see Ren was a bit smaller than him. His tail had a few good feet on him, and the upper half of his body gave I'm a slight clearance in height as well. Ren's body, in general, was also thinner, though Goro knew he only had the mass he did to survive his deep fives and long stretches of swimming in open water.

“H-hey wait, you don’t have to-” Goro stopped moving so Ren would stop as well. “Sorry. I’m sorry.” Goro held up his hands. It was slowly dawning on him how ridiculous this was. He swam up, full speed to a total stranger and started to approach him like they’d always known each other.

“I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean to intrude.” Goro cleared his throat, Ren still wasn’t saying anything. He was just looking over Goro. Studying him from head to tail like he was in shock. “I came to, well I guess to meet you? And introduce myself… I heard your song-”

“You heard my song?” Ren finally spoke. He stopped studying Goro and finally looked him in the eye. The stunned, but somewhat excited look on his face made Goro smile.

“Yes, well… I mean I heard the noise.”

“Oh.” Ren’s enthusiasm faded.

Goro lurched forward a bit, “But I know it’s supposed to be a song! Wakaba told me when I asked her what the sound I’d been hearing for two weeks was-”

“Wakaba?” Ren at least didn’t back up this time when Goro moved forward. “Wakaba sent you?”

“No, she didn’t send me… I’m living with her. And her daughter.” Goro let out a sigh, “I’m, really sorry… I know, this conversation is a mess. I didn’t mean to come bother you I,” He looked down and shook his head. “I guess I was just curious.”

Goro looked back up at Ren and nodded, “I’ll leave you to your singing.”

As he turned to leave, Ren moved closer, he reached out like he was ready to grab Goro’s arm but hesitated. Goro stopped and looked down at Ren’s hand hanging in the air. He wasn’t sure why he stopped? But something nagged at him that he was waiting for permission.

He looked up at Ren, who was waiting, his lips just slightly parted as he tried to find a way to ask.

“You can,” Goro answered his question.

Ren slowly reached out and touched Goro’s arm. His fingers shook as he traced along his skin, and over the scales of his fin down to his hand before he grasped it.

He had been waiting for permission. What an absurd thing to do? If he wanted to touch him, he just had to. How else would he learn about him?

Ren turned over Goro’s hand and continued to trace along his fingers. He studied Ren’s face as a range of emotions swept over the other mermaid: confusion, awe, curiosity, but mostly something he wouldn’t quite call sadness. Like he was on the verge of crying but wasn’t sure which emotion was triggering it.

“Are you okay?” Ren looked up at him. “You look like you’re going to cry.”

“Goro,” Ren whispered his name.

“…You know who I am?” It was his turn to be shocked.

“You don’t know me?”

“I- I don’t know anyone, really.” Goro rubbed the back of his head where he’d been struck. “I was caught in the storm last month. Tossed around under the water and woke up on the ocean floor. I don’t know how long I was unconscious for… Wakaba found me.”

“The storm?” Ren questioned him.

“The big one, west of here?” Ren shook his head. “Maybe you missed it… There were a bunch of humans in these waters. You probably swam away to hide-”

“Yes, I had to leave. They were looking around for-” Ren hesitated. He looked out over the ocean and Goro followed his gaze.

Nothing was there.

“So you were staying with Wakaba this whole time?”

He changed the subject. Was he hiding something?

“I was… But, she only just mentioned you. You know her. She never said that I knew you.”

Ren looked Goro over. He was clearly thinking. Slowly he shook his head, “I guess… I’m wrong. I don’t know you, I just- Futaba she just- says things.”

“Oh,” Ren let go of Goro’s hand and sat still.

There was a long silence. He watched as Ren kept his eyes off him now, he turned them down to his little colored rectangle. Goro could see little drop of water falling off his face onto the paper. It looked like an image of two humans.

They were smiling. They looked happy together. But clearly looking at them was upsetting Ren. Was that the source of his song’s melancholy?

“Um,” Goro cleared his throat and reached out to touch the side of Ren’s face. He pulled his chin up to look at him, “I’m not really sure why. Even if we don’t know each other… Your song sounds familiar to me. Maybe I used to hear it before you exchanged it for human speech. I can’t really remember much of anything but… I do like hearing you sing.”

For the first time since he arrived Goro saw Ren smile. His lips curled up just a bit, and for a moment his eyes brightened with joy.

“Do you mind if I stay and listen to you?”

“Yes, you can stay.” Ren turned his head to the side and pressed his cheek against Goro’s palm. “But I’m going to be stopping soon.”

“Will you sing again tomorrow?”

“Yes.”

“Then I’ll come back sooner.”

Ren laughed this time and Goro couldn’t help but laugh with him.

“I’d really like that.” Ren pulled away from Goro’s hand and shifted his body around so he could lean in closer to him as he started singing again.

Goro felt a smile broaden across his lips as the song started up. This time Ren didn’t look at his image, he just stared at Goro, his expression full of a warm nostalgic happiness he’d never seen before, but that he swear he knew. He found himself trying to hum along to the song and slowly leaning down to settle into the sand.

He stretched out his tail across the beach and let his head rest on the upper part of Ren’s tail. The other mermaid started to comb his fingers through his hair; occasionally picking out his little antenna and fiddling with them.

Goro continued to listen, trying to work out what Ren was saying, “I wish I could sing with you… But I don’t know the words.”

“…I could sing it in human,” Ren whispered. “Actually, in human, it’s a duet.”

“Really?” Goro considered it. “But I don’t know human very well, just a few words.”

“I can still teach you the song.”

“Wouldn’t it take me a long time to know its meaning?”

“…Maybe. But I think you’ll know what it means in your heart.”

“Alright.” Ren started singing again. Goro noted this time it was the human version. He still had no idea what was being said. “…I think this is what I’ve been looking for along.” Goro whispered to him.

“Then I’m happy that you found me.”

“I think, no, I know…” Goro closed his eyes and smiled. “I’m happy I found you.”

Chapter Text

Out in the ocean, a ways from civilization but not too far from reach, two lonely islands sat among the waves. They were connected by a land bridge that was sometimes there and sometimes concealed by the tide. The southern island consisted mostly of warm beaches, swaying palms, and little pockets of sea life frolicking around in the crystal-clear shallows the surrounded the island.

Its northern partner was a bit more rugged. With rough ground and rocks surrounding it from all sides, it had no easy shore line to allow access to its lush interior. It was covered from end to end with thick plants, vines and shrubs, all feed a health supply of fresh water from the spring in it’s center.

They weren’t large enough for anyone to inhabit, but they were a home. Beneath the islands, under their foundation and hidden among their reefs an underwater den had been carved out years prior.

Ren had found the islands, and that no one had claimed them as their home and made them his own. It took him weeks, because the island’s base was hard, but he managed to shape out a tiny home for himself. It was good that the base of the land was strong, it meant it would a decent place for him to stay during storms. And where they were positioned was just right for him to swim out and observe humans without having to live too close to their homes.

He thought he would live under these little islands alone forever. Especially after he met Wakaba and traded away his song. The prospect of being on his own forever was lonely, but he felt somewhat safe in that decision. It meant no one would ever shout at him again. He’d never have to worry about being denied his fair share of meals, or excluded from games or unprotected when the group was in danger.

Looking back now, he knew he could never go back to living on his own.

Outside the den Ren could hear the familiar sounds of four merry and excited chirps. Just chirps. They weren’t full and proper songs yet. But they were trying. They were making their own little chorus of calls out of fragmented notes and yells and whistles as they tried to establish who they were on the bottom of the ocean floor.

They were currently excitedly announcing the hunting of a great shark. And those making the calls made sure to do so close to the cave entrance so the occupants inside would know.

“It can’t be morning already,” a voice under Ren grumbled. Low and deep, the vibration mimicked the sound of the waves crashing in a storm. “Tell them to come back in, it’s too early for play.”

“It is morning, Goro.” Ren lifted his head form his partner’s chest and leaned up to kiss him on the end of his nose. Goro’s face wrinkled up. “They’re not going to stop calling until you go out there and be the monster for their game.”

Goro let out a series of annoyed groans that echoed around the cave. He and Ren had expanded his little den four years ago. They had to.

Four years ago, after a nearly a year of coming to visit and occasionally staying, Goro finally moved to the islands form Wakaba’s wreck. However, he was larger than Ren. And the two of them trying to fit into his little den just didn’t work out.

Thankfully, Wakaba sent Futaba to them with some items she identified as a ‘hammer’ and a ‘spade’ to make the cave bigger. It made the process much easier than Ren’s original method of clawing at the walls and using rocks to chip away at the base.

Ren did accidently point out to Futaba this wouldn’t have been a problem if they hadn’t made Goro so big. A statement that Goro still pesters him about the meaning of to this day. Afterall Goro wasn’t big- Ren was just small.

They ended up needing to expanded it again a year later after they had their first clutch of eggs.

Goro finally pushed himself up and grabbed Ren so he could roll them over and place him on the cave floor. He tussled Ren’s hair and offered him an affectionate hum before circling around the den and shooting out with a fake roar of terror. Outside the four smaller voices yelped and laughed offering up pretend panic and fear.

Ren laughed to himself listening to the excitement outside of the cave.

Over head he’d managed to carve out a little notch that he’d slid his most prized possession into. An old human photo of a woman and her son. Ren had put into the roof of his cave so he could look at it every night after he went to bed. Originally, he used to stare up at it and cry himself to sleep. He hadn’t realized that weeks later the boy in the picture would be swimming up to his beach in a new body, confused that he both knew and did not know him. But accepting that he wanted to make new memories with him in place of what was missing.

Ren pushed himself up and let out a sigh.

He was feeling tired the past few mornings. And his body was starting to feel heavy, weighed down. He ran his hands over the upper portion of his tail, pressing down he felt his body resisting. He looked around the cave and considered the space. Well it had been three years, it would be nearly four soon enough. He was sure they still had the tools Wakaba had given them out in the reef among their things.

Ren finally pushed himself up completely and swam out of the den to watch the game.

Outside he spotted Goro chasing around four tadpoles; merchildren no longer than a few feet in length. Their bodies were chubby, fins short, and not that skilled at swiming. Yet, they were swimming circles around him, but Goro was letting them win.

Ren watched as two swam around Goro frantically, their bodies just blurs of white and red. They still hadn’t grown out of their child camouflage yet, so their bodies were speckled with white over their red scales. But Ren could already tell their smallest was going to be red and white by the way the spots were working themselves out into a striped pattern across her back and all down her tail, spine and arms. Goro managed to snag her by her arm and she let out a playful cry of help. Her long brown hair started tangling about as she shook her head.

“You’re mine!” Goro exclaimed.

“No, no, no! The shark got me!”

Goro pulled her into a hug and started to pretend to chew on her face.

“Grrr, Mika-fish taste delicious.”

“Help! Help!”

Ren kept his eyes on them as he swam over the coral bed just outside their cave. The other three tadpoles had gathered together to watch and plot. One of their sons with a red, black and white pattern bobbed back and forth trying to get the other two excited.

“Come on! Come on! You can’t be scared! It’s a real hunt! We have to fight him!”

Ren watched him waving his arms around frantically, causing the messy black hair he inherited form him to tangle up even more. He had to stop and push it out of his eyes, one gold and one grey, to keep watch on his siblings. Easily the biggest of the bunch, but it made him into something of caution-less daredevil.

“Akira!” Ren shouted at him, “Don’t get too rough.”

Akira stopped waving around like a fish flopping on land and pulled his hands back behind his back.

“I’m just playing, Papa!”

Ren shook his head but kept smiling. He eventually stopped over an area of the reef that they’d cleared out and placed Goro’s old mattress on. He’d brought it and the mirror from the wreck. But they couldn’t get either into the cave. The mattress was too wide, and Ren worried about expanding the mouth of the cave, as it could invite in predators, and make the storm surge worse.

So out in front, in the shallows it went. It made a good napping spot at least.

The mirror was back against the island’s base. Ren didn’t really find it as interesting to study himself as Goro did. But once the kids were old enough to leave the cave they greatly enjoyed it as well.

“Attack!” Ren heard Akira call out just as he settled down onto the mattress. Over the top of the reef he could see Akira leading his brother, black and white with dual red stripes forming on his tail, and other sister, slowly turning all white save for a few light red speckles on her tail and fins, into a charge on the ‘shark’.

Goro had to let their smallest go, and immediately Mika swam away and right over to Ren. She flopped down onto the mattress next to him and snuggled up to his side to hide her face.

“What’s wrong Mika?” He tucked his arm around her.

“I always get caught. Daddy picks on me.” She kept her face buried into his side as she spoke, keeping her words muffled.

“Goro’s not picking on you, Sweetie. He just gets you because you always hang back. He wants you feel included.”

The shouting from the game and the cries from the ‘shark’ grew louder as Goro led the attack party back over to the mattress. Where after a few fake punches to his nose and gills he very over dramatically died and fell onto the rest of the soft surface with his upper half on the mattress and his tail hanging off.

“We won!” Ren watched their other three kids swim around in a circle over head chanting a victory cry. Their song consisted of each of them mashing notes together trying to make a tune. 

Akira came to a stop,“Let’s do it again!”

“No,” Goro shook his head and closed his eyes.. “You kids go play something that doesn’t require a monster to beat up.”

“Okay!” Their second son turned to his sisters. “Akechi, Mika, come on.” He waved for them to follow him. Mika freed herself form Ren and swam after her two bigger siblings.

“Robin, don’t lead your sister’s outside the reef!” Ren turned to shout after them.

“We’re just going to play mirror tag!”

Ren kept his head up, following them with his eyes until they stopped over by the mirror and started swimming back and forth between it.

“Daddy,” Akira had stayed behind. He perched himself on Goro’s chest and looked down at him excitedly, “Can I go hunting with you and Ryuji?”

“Hmn? You already go hunting with me, Akira,” Goro opened one eye.

“No, not for food. When there’s a real shark in the area! I want to go.”

“No.” Both Ren and Goro answered.

“Why! I know everything to do for a shark! I did everything Ryuji taught me during our game-”

“That’s a game. Where I am the shark, Akira,” Goro sat up slightly, “You’re too small to go predator hunting. If there are sharks in the area, you’ll stay in den with Ren and your siblings.”

“But I’m the biggest!”

“Akira,” Ren interrupted him, “Go play with your siblings.”

Akira hesitated for a moment before making an indigent series of chirps and whistles. He pushed off of Goro and flipped, head over tail in the water before swimming off away from the mirror and his brother and sisters. Ren watched him swim away until he stopped to start chasing clownfish around the coral.

“…I’m worried about Akira and Mika.” He turned to Goro.

“I understand Akira, but why Mika?”

“She’s upset she’s the smallest. You notice lately she comes and hides with me hallway through their games?”

“I’m trying to include her more…” Goro rolled over so he could prop himself up on his elbows and look at Ren.

“I know… But I’m still worried.”

Goro reached out and grabbed one of Ren’s hands. He held it tightly in his own before bringing it to his lips making Ren smile. Goro had picked up the gestures from years of Ren performing them himself.

“I won’t take him shark hunting. But maybe I can find some small predator I can teach Akira to handle… Maybe eel duty would be good for him.”

“He might like that.” Ren leaned in to press their foreheads together. “As for Mika… Do you think she’d like helping me care for eggs.”

“She probably would. But don’t you want to provide her with a more immediate task to help her feel more included.”

“Hmmmn,” Ren kept his forehead to Goro’s but let his eyes drift away to look to the side.

“…Ren?” Goro grabbed the sides of his face to try and make him look back at him. “Ren!” He shouted his name and started to laugh.

Ren pulled away laughing, “I’m not sure! I just- feel the same way I did before we had the kids. Its been a few years… I’ve forgotten a bit of the signs-”

“You’ve forgotten because you keep filling you head with human garbage,” Goro teased.

Ren scoffed and started to reprimand him when a noise came to his ears. Both he and Goro turned their heads the same direction. Their focused on the ocean waters beyond where Akira was playing.

“…A boat.” Goro said, all the excitement gone form his voice.

“It’s coming this way. Maybe it will keep going?” Ren glanced at Goro.

As they listened to the sound draw closer, Akira stopped playing. He hovered over the reef for a few minutes before turning and shouting at them that a boat was coming.

“It’s coming right for the island,” Goro pushed off the mattress and shouted, “Kids! Into the den!”

Ren continued to watch as the boat came into view. Why was a boat coming to their island? Boats hadn’t come directly to the island in years. They passed by, or they stopped out in the deeper waters to fish. But to come to the islands? Why?

Robin, Akechi, and Mika all came back right away. Goro ushered them into the den and then called for Akira directly.

“Akira! Come on!”

Akira lingered just a bit longer before swimming back to Goro and his family.

Goro stayed outside the den, watching Ren.

Ren stayed on the mattress watching as the boat pulled up just outside the edge of the reef. It lowered its anchor. And then nothing. Were they planning on fishing? They didn’t put any lines in the water? Ren finally got up from the mattress and started to swim towards the boat.

“Ren!” Goro called after him. He glanced back to see Goro shake his head. Behind him their children were peeking out from the cave entrance. Goro hated the idea of going near humans. But Ren had to know why they were here…

He ignored his partner’s calls and swam up toward the ship. As he approached he could hear a woman talking. He only heard her voice. Was she talking to herself? Ren made sure to stay down low so he could approach from under the ship’s shadow and listen.

լAnyway… I should get to the point. I only have this boat for a day and I’m sure you don’t want to be bogged down with my ridiculous story about boating lessons…˥

Who was she talking to? Ren glanced back at the den. Goro was still waiting for him, frowning and looking nervous. His antanee had freed themselves from his hair and were turning various shades of yellow and white.

Ren slowly made his way up the side of the boat so he could hear better.

լYou probably thought I didn’t give a shit since, you know… It’s over been five years! Who doesn’t come visit their friend’s grave in five full years but… Honestly I- I didn’t come because I didn’t really know what to say?˥

“A grave?” Ren approached the surface and slowly pushed his head out of the water. He couldn’t see who was talking, but it sounded like her voice was coming from the back of the boat facing the island.

լI’m sorry I didn’t understand… I always kind of took your proclamations of death as being really dramatic daddy issues. I knew you were unhappy, but you know! I figured we’d make it out together.˥

There was a long pause. Ren used the opportunity to swim around towards the end of the boat. He could see something colorful falling into the water. Uppong closer inspection he realized it was petals. He followed the drifting bits up to see a large handful of flowers being held over the edge by a woman. She had long, dark brown hair tied back in a ponytail, and was wearing a blue jacket over a black dress.

լAnyway I knew if I didn’t come now I wouldn’t get the chance… I’m leaving the country. I- you remember that weird kid with the blue hair from the Kosei graduation party we crashed? That one that followed me all night asking to model? …Well surprise! He really is an artist. I ran into him again two years ago at a show for a gallery. He had some works on display. They’re not bad… He’s not bad.˥

Ren watched the woman’s shoulders sag and she reached up to wipe away a few tears.

լHe’s got a show in America! So, you know, I’m going with… We’re, ah, we’re going to get engaged… I really wish you could be there.˥

Ren leaned out a bit from the boat to get a good look at her face and watch her cry.

“Ren!” He looked down when he heard Goro hissing his name. He’d swum up to the boat bottom and was looking at him with a wide horrified expression. “You’ll be seen! Get down here!”

“Wait, just wait-”

լAnyway, Goro, these are for you.˥

Ren snapped his head back up at the woman on the boat.

լI wanted you to know I still think about you. I’m sorry you couldn’t be here to be happy with us. Haru and Hifumi send their regards. And I mean, you know… You did at least get your wish. After you died, suddenly then everyone could come out of the wood work and talk about how shitty your dad was. Old teachers, old classmates, tutors… They were all ready to throw him under the bus for mistreating you.˥

She paused again.

լI did too. I should have done it while you were alive-˥

Ren swam out from the boat’s shadow and shouted at the woman, լAre you here for Goro!?˥

The woman on the boat paused for a moment. She looked around confused.

լIs- is someone talking?˥

լDown here!˥ Ren splashed in the water and waved to her. She leaned over the side of the boat and her jaw dropped. լYou are, aren’t you? You’re here for-˥

She started to scream. She dropped her flowers on the deck of her boat and backed up.

“Ren!” Goro swam up and grabbed his arms. He pulled Ren under the water and held him tight. “What are you doing!” Goro shook him. “You’re going to get taken away! Stop! Come on we have to leave-”

“Goro, wait!” Ren shook his head. “I think I know what this human wants! She’s not dangerous!”

“ All humans are dangerous!”

Ren shook himself free from Goro and came back out of the water just as the woman stopped screaming. She was not pacing the boat talking to herself.

լOkay, okay, okay… Calm down, Mika. You didn’t see a mermaid. You did NOT see a mermaid. It’s fine. It’s fine. You’re in an emotionally compromised state. This is a big deal for you. The therapist warned you might be emotionally overwhelmed and see things… Its fine… Its fine…˥

լUh, Hello? Are you alright?˥

լOh god, my hallucination is questioning my health…˥ Ren watched her walk back to the edge of the boat nervously. լH-hi hallucination mermaid.˥

լHi!˥ Ren waved to her. լI’m, Ren! You must be Mika!˥

լOh, good, you know my name, figment of my imagination… Uh, look, I’m just here to leave my friend some flowers. And then I’m going to go. I don’t really need a psychotic break out here in the middle of the ocean. So, if you could just… not talk. That would be great.˥

լYou brought flowers for Goro.˥ Ren smiled, լYou came because he died right?˥

լYou’re not going to stop talking are you?˥ She lowered her head. լWhy… Oh my god, why is this happening to me…˥

լGoro isn’t dead.˥

Mika continued to stare at Ren with complete apathy.

լI mean… He kind of ‘died’ but… Uh… It’s hard to explain…˥ Ren reached up and played with his hair. He didn’t know what to tell her. լThere was is much to explain… I know! I’ll show you!˥

Ren dove back under the water and scanned around for his partner. He saw Goro still hiding under the boat. He was now trying to shoo away their children who had come rushing out of the den once they saw him rush up to grab Ren. He was trying to reassure them Ren was not being taken.

“Goro!” Ren waved his hands, “Come here!”

“Ren! You come here!”

“Goro! Come up here and see this human!”

“No!”

“Why does Papa want you to see the human?” Robin asked.

“Are they funny looking?” Mika looked confused.

“I want to see them!” Akira tried to swim forward only to be grabbed.

“I thought humans were dangerous?” Akechi asked.

“They are,” Goro answered her.

“Goro! She’s not going to leave until she sees you!”

Goro glared at Ren. He crossed his arms and jerked his head up toward the surface.

“Kids, go back to the den. Now.” Goro let go of Akira and swam up to the surface. Ren took his hand and emerged first.

լMika?˥ She was standing at the end of her boat, looking out over the water. When Ren popped up, she looked startled again, but calmed down after a few deep breaths. լMika… I want you, reintroduce you to someone…˥

Ren pulled Goro’s hands and brought him up out of the water. Goro was still glaring, unsure he liked this. He fixed his eyes on her and slowly his agitation faded. As Mika looked at him, she gasped. She gripped the sides of the boat and her eyes went wide.

լG-goro? Goro is that you!?˥

He didn’t respond. He just looked at Ren.

լHe doesn’t quite understand human as well anymore.˥ Ren answered. լFive years ago, I found him after he fell form his boat and brought him here. Goro said he didn’t want to go back to his father… So, he stayed here with me. But-˥

լBut?˥ Mika continued to watch Goro. Goro was looking between her and him trying to understand.

լTo be like me, he had to forget he was human… I’m sorry. But he is alive! He’s not dead!˥

Some of the shock faded from Mika’s face. As she thought about Ren’s words, she wasn’t sure how she felt. Goro was alive, but not human. He didn’t even recall being human but…

լIs he happy?˥ Mika asked Ren.

լWe’re very happy together!˥ Ren answered enthusiastically. լ I’ve been trying to teach him some human again, but it’s a slow process… He has learned to sing our song however.˥

լYour song?˥

լOh, uh… Its like how mermaids seal a bond. Like humans kissing.˥

Ren watched as Mika folded her hands together and a genuine smile crossed her face.

լHe’s happy with you?˥

լYes.˥ Ren smiled at her. Goro looked back and forth between the two like he was thinking of something and then he spoke.

լ…Mika?˥

լHe knows my name!˥ She exclaimed.

Ren chuckled, լHe picked up on what you’re called. Actually Goro’s really good at learning through observation. But he might remember you somewhat. He named our smallest daughter after you. But said he couldn’t remember why he thought the name was pretty.˥

լHe think’s my name is pre- Wait! DAUGHTER!˥

Ren hesitated and then looked at Goro.

“Can we show her the kids?”

“Absolutely not!” Goro’s antenna freed themselves from his hair again to show they were glowing red with agitation.

Ren smiled sweetly, լHe says he doesn’t want to bring the kids up he-˥

“I want to see the human!” In the middle of his sentence Akira burst out of the water and Mika yelped. Akira started to swim around his parents chanting the word ‘human’ over and over. To Mika it sounded like he was making the same high-pitched squeak again and again.

Shortly after he was joined by a chorus of squeaks as the rest of the kids started to jump out of the water at random. Goro started shouting at them to get back down.  His voice sounded like a series of barks to her, and Mika started to laugh.

լKids! Goro has kids!˥ She leaned over the boat and mocked him,  լShido Goro! You con-artist! You convinced everyone you were dead and you’re out here banging the cutest mer-boy in the seven seas.˥

Goro turned to look at her a bit confused. He was unsure of what he said but for some reason he felt like smiling at her. Something about her tone told him she was being snarky.

“I don’t know what that human said… But you tell her if that’s an insult, I’m taking it as a compliment.”

Ren chuckled and turned to explain his answer to Mika. Goro watched as Mika laughed. And she and Ren exchanged a few more words.

լYou called him ‘Shido’ Goro… I thought his name was Akechi Goro? I picked that name for our other girl...˥

լAkechi was his mother’s name… He used to use it when he didn’t want people to associate him with his father.˥

լI see.˥ Ren turned to his partner and smiled. լWell it worked. I think Goro is wonderful. And his mom sounded wonderful too.˥

Mika reached down and grabbed the bouquet of flowers, լHere! For the happy couple!˥ She tossed them into the water. The moment they hit the waves the kids swarmed over them asking what they were. Mika chuckled at the uproar of musical notes. լOh my god, they’re so cute…˥

լMika,˥ Ren called for her attention. լI know this is a lot to ask but… I don’t think you can return here.˥ Ren looked over to his kids. լI had to leave my island and live out in open water for weeks while humans were searching for Goro. Our kids are small… They won’t survive out in the open sea. If you come back, a lot others might come too…˥

Mika looked at the kids and then at Goro and Ren. լI understand. I’m leaving for the other side of the world next month. That why I came to say goodbye…˥

She leaned over the boat and held out her hand. Ren urged Goro to swim up to her. He was hesitant but did so. He stopped just before her hand, staring at it before reaching out to take it. Mika squeezed it and smiled.

լSo long, Goro. I’m glad you finally found that happiness you were missing when you were living as a human.˥

Goro looked into her eyes and felt a weird sensation run down his spine. He’d never met this human before, but suddenly he felt sad. Like seeing someone he’d been missing for a long time. It wasn’t quite the same feeling as when he saw Ren for the first time but it was so close...

լGood- Goodbye, Mika.˥ Goro nodded and looked back at Ren as if questioning if he said it right.

Mika let out a soft chuckle before letting go and pulling her hand back.

լGoodbye, Goro. Ren! Take care of him for me! I know he’s kind of an idiot and jerk, but he’s a good guy.˥

լGoodbye, Mika! And I will!˥ Ren waved to her before ordering the kids back under the water. Goro grabbed the bouquet of flowers and dragged it under the waves. They watched as Mika raised the boat’s anchor and started the engine.

“She’s leaving?” Their Mika asked.

“Yes,” Goro answered her. “I don’t think she’ll be back either.”

“Aww,” Akira huffed. “We didn’t get to talk to her!”

“There’s no need to!” Goro scolded him. “Come on! Back to the den, all of you!” He handed off the flowers to the kids so they could play with them before turning back to Akira.

“That was dangerous, you know.”

“I know.”

“Never do it again.”

“I promise, I won’t.”

“Good,” Goro grabbed Ren around the waist and gently kissed him on the lips.

Ren chuckled and pressed his cheek to Goro’s shoulder.

“Will you sing to me?”

“Right now?”

“Yes. Right now.”

Goro let out a bit of a content sigh and continued to hold Ren as he started up his song. Once he started singing, the kids started trying to offer up their own additions to the melody.

“We’re alone together, in miles of blue sea. Just the two of us adrift, for as far as anyone can see.”

“But you’re not alone, you’ve got me!” Akira swam around them excitedly. In his hands he waved around the flowers, causing the petals to fall off and drift around his parents in the little whirlpool he was creating.

“And me!” Akechi wrapped herself around Goro’s tail.

“Me too!” Robin joined Akira in circling them.

“And I’m here!” Mika grabbed onto Ren’s shoulders.

 “Our family might not seem natural, it might seem odd, but when I’m swimming with you I never feel lost.”

“We’re swimming together, now, across every wave!” The group sang together to Ren.

“Under the sun, under the moon-”

“And with each passing day.  We’re swimming the ocean, with you and our song-”

“I think this is what I’ve been looking for all along,” Goro kissed the top of Ren’s forehead. 

Out in the ocean, as Mika sped away, she could faintly hear a tune hitting her ears. She only caught bits and pieces but stuck with her for the rest of her life. And occasionally she found herself humming back the song that filled her heart with a bittersweet joy.

լYou’re together in the ocean. Just you and your song.˥