Archive of Our Own ^beta

"I heard he had a nervous breakdown." Sky hears the words and stops before rounding the corner. 'It's not about me'. He tries to reassure himself as he continues to listen, despite his brain telling him to walk away.

"No way, I think he went away with that hot boyfriend of his. He's rich and influential so he could easily arrange for Sky to miss classes."

Sky can feel his heart rate pick up and his hands are trembling but his legs won't move. He's frozen to the spot, listening with morbid curiosity to his peers speculating about his three-week absence.

"No matter the reason, he shouldn't have been allowed back into the program." A female voice says and Sky thinks he recognizes it, but he doesn't care who it is. 'They're right.' A voice whispers in his head. 'You don't deserve to be here.' It viciously continues.

"Yeah, well, I guess he has friends in high places." A male voice replies this time.

"Sky! There you are!" Rain calls from behind him, excitement clear in his voice. He turns around slowly, trying to get his breathing under control, but obviously fails because Rain asks, worried: "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's nothing. Let's go." He steers his friend back in the direction he had just come from. Away from the voices which have quieted noticeably.

Rain finally pulls his arm free when they reach the cafeteria entrance. "Sky, you're pale and shaking like a leaf, what happened? Should I call P'Pai?" The obvious worry in his best friend's voice almost has Sky in tears but he pushes down the emotions and persuades his friend that he is fine and that he doesn't need to phone Pai.

Rain doesn't look convinced but he backs down, changing the subject to the next street race. Sky lets his friend's excited voice soothe his nerves as he tries to forget the hurtful things he overheard.

But forgetting proves difficult, the things they said have settled like lacerations on his heart. He spends every waking moment working on his assignments and the school work he missed.

Every time Prapai tries to get him to take a break, Sky refuses and tells him that he will slow down when he is caught up on his classwork.

Sky knows that he is pushing himself but the voices in his head are getting meaner. 'You're useless. Your classmates are right, you don't deserve to be there. You should just quit for real."

Sky shakes his head, trying to clear his mind. He glances at his watch and is surprised to see that it's 4 am already. He sneaks into the bedroom and quietly lies down next to Pai, trying his best not to wake his soulmate. He promised him that he would be in bed by 11 pm.

Sky breathes a sigh of relief when Pai only turns around in his sleep, finding Sky's body and pulling him close, but doesn't wake up. He falls asleep within seconds.

He groans when a hand shakes him lightly on the shoulder. "Sky, sweetheart, you need to wake up. It's 7:00 and you said that you want to stop by Phayu's before uni this morning."

He finally opens his eyes and is met with Pai's worried expression.

"Baby, what time did you come to bed?"

Sky looks away quickly as he fibs. "Not late, P'Pai. I can't remember the exact time but not long after you did."

Pai doesn't believe him, he knows that much, but the older man doesn't call him out on his lie. Instead, Pai hugs him before going to the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

Prapai drives him to Phayu's house. They take the car because Pai isn't sure Sky won't fall asleep on the bike in his current condition.

Phayu agreed to help him prepare for the make-up test he is taking later that day.

Rain ambushes Pai in the living room where he is waiting for Sky. "P'Pai, I'm glad I can have a moment alone with you. I'm worried about Sky." He gets straight to the point.

Pai looks at Sky's best friend warily. If Rain has picked up on Sky's worrying behaviour, things are worse than Pai imagined. His concern has been steadily increasing. His soulmate hasn't been sleeping much, pressuring himself to catch up.

"Sky has trouble staying awake in class. He's exhausted, is he sleeping at all?" Rain asks trying to keep the accusation out of his tone.

"I'm not sure how much he's sleeping," Pai answers honestly. "He insists on working after I go to bed. He promises to follow me soon after, but I'm not sure he does."

Pai sighs in frustration. He can't shake the feeling that they're missing something.

"Rain, did something happen at uni? He started staying up late a few days ago and he's determined to get his missed assignments and projects done as soon as possible. We arranged for him to have time to catch up. He doesn't need to work himself to death like this."

Rain shakes his head in denial but then stops, remembering the strange look on his friend's face that day at uni, and the way he was trembling. "P'Pai, there was something, it happened a week ago. I found him standing in the hallway, he was pale and shivering. I asked him what was wrong, but he deflected. Fuck! Something must have..."

"Naughty boy! Language!" Phayu's stern voice cuts off what he was about to say. Phayu glares at Rain and then at Prapai while Sky just stares into space, looking like he might fall asleep while standing.

Pai takes Sky's arm and guides him to the sofa in the living room.

"P'Pai, we need to go." Sky protests weakly but sits down anyway. Too exhausted to put up a real fight.

"Sky, baby. Rain and I are worried about you. You're not sleeping and you're working yourself to death. Sky, we spoke to the faculty, you don't need to..."

"Why? P'Pai, why did you do that?"

Pai stares at his soulmate as he interrupts him angrily. Sky is furious and he pulls away from Prapai who is trying to hold him.

"I didn't ask you to." He adds, his voice softer this time.

Pai is shaken by his soulmate's reaction but he quickly composes himself and then turns the younger man's face to look into his eyes.

His breath catches at the sorrow he finds.

"I know, my Sky, but I wanted to. And Phayu wanted to. You deserve..."

"No! No, I don't. I shouldn't be there." Sky pulls away completely as he wraps his arms around himself.

Pai is utterly lost. 'What the hell?' He looks at Rain and then at Phayu who has matching expressions of confusion and heartbreak.

"Sky, what do you mean? Why do you think that?" Phayu asks as he kneels in front of the younger man. He reaches out and carefully places a hand on one of his knees.

Sky remains silent and refuses to make eye contact. His lack of response has the other three men even more concerned.

Rain sits down on the arm of the sofa and pulls his friend against him. Sky stays stiff as Rain tries to hug him. "Sky, you're my best friend and I love you. Those weeks without you in class were the worst. I don't only want you by my side, I need you there."

Sky slowly relaxes as Rain speaks and by the end of his little speech, Sky is hugging him back fiercely, tears running down his cheeks.

Pai and Phayu exchange relieved glances as they watch the two younger men embrace each other.

Pai waits until Sky pulls away from Rain's embrace before he asks his soulmate to look at him. He's frowning slightly when he asks: "My Sky, what happened? Who put the idea in your head that you don't deserve to be back at the university?"

Sky shakes his head in denial, avoiding eye contact. "I, I don't know what you're talking about, P'Pai." But the tremble in his voice, combined with his body language is a dead giveaway that he's lying.

"Something happened, at the university," Rain states firmly, leaving no room for arguments.

Sky finally sighs in defeat and stares miserably at his hands.

"I overheard some of our classmates talking." Rain and Pai share angry looks over Sky's head but no one says anything, patiently waiting for him to continue.

"They, they feel that I shouldn't be there. That I've been given special treatment because of," he glances at Pai for a second before looking back down. "because you're my boyfriend."

Pai can feel the rage boiling in his veins. 'How dare they?' He thinks. 'They have no idea what he's been through'.

Rain's face is flushed in anger. "Who, Sky? Who said that?"

Sky looks up at the obvious anger in his best friend's voice and he is left speechless at the matching furious expressions on all three faces staring at him.

"Umm, guys, you do know that murder is against the law, right?" He attempts to lighten the mood.

It doesn't work, Pai also insists on knowing who made the remarks.

Sky looks at each of the men before he responds.

"Guys, I appreciate the concern, but I don't know for sure who it was. I didn't see their faces, I only heard them. And, more importantly, they don't have the full story. I can't blame them for speculating... "

Pai interrupts heatedly: "Like hell you can't. Baby, they have no right to spread rumours, especially because they don't know the details."

Rain and Phayu nod along in agreement, still furious on Sky's behalf.

Sky sighs, he is exhausted and doesn't have the energy to argue, but he knows that he needs to get his friends and boyfriend to drop the matter.

"Look, yes, I was hurt and upset when I heard them. And I took the things they said to heart. I'm glad you guys called me out on it. I needed to share this with you, I know logically that what they said isn't true. But the voices in my head kept repeating all the hurtful things I heard and adding untruths from my past."

His arms are wrapped around himself in a self-hug again and Pai pulls him into his side, enveloping his soulmate in his strong arms.

"I'm okay, really. I promise I'll slow down. I'll take the time the faculty gave me to catch up." He turns to look at Rain as he asks: "Please, don't make a scene. I just want to forget about what happened and focus on my studies. I'll talk to you guys if I feel overwhelmed, okay?"

The other men don't look convinced and they still look peeved but they eventually agree reluctantly.

When Prapai drops Sky at the university the younger man doesn't miss the way his soulmate glares at the students passing by. He just chuckles and kisses him on the cheek before he joins Rain.

Pai watches the two enter the university and turns to Phayu who has joined him at his car.

"I hate this Phayu. He's been through hell and now he has to contend with petty jealousy as well." His hands are balled into fists by his side, fighting the urge to punch something.

"I know Pai, I feel the same, but believe me, Rain won't let this go. He'll make sure Sky knows how much he deserves to be here, and he'll take care of anyone who doesn't agree."

The morning passes uneventfully, Rain keeps an eye on Sky and their classmates, making mental notes of everyone's interactions with his friend.

They're sitting at their usual table at lunch break. Sky is quietly dozing, his head resting on top of his arms while Rain, Sig and Ple discuss their newest assignments.

"It must be nice, missing 3 weeks of classes and then sleeping peacefully through lunch. I should get myself a wealthy boyfriend."

Rain is up and in the student's face within seconds. Atid is taken aback by Rain's sudden invasion of his personal space. Atid is a tall guy with a medium build, larger than Rain in all aspects, but he finds himself cowering at the rage emanating from the smaller man.

Sig and Ple are by Rain's side now, not sure what has set him off but ready to back him up if needed.

Rain glances at Sky and is relieved to see that his friend is still asleep.

He steps even closer, jabbing his finger into the man's chest as he snarls at him. "You have no right talking about my friend behind his back. He has every right to be here. Heck, he deserves to be here more than any of us. If I ever hear you talking about him again I will make sure to let his very wealthy and influential boyfriend know exactly who has been spreading rumours about him. And believe me, he is very protective of his soulmate."

Rain revels in the fear he can see in the other man's eyes. Atid backs away slowly, his hands raised to show he isn't a threat.

"Hey, calm down, man. I meant no harm." He turns around and hurries away, glancing back once to make sure Rain isn't following him.

"And make sure to tell your friends to stop spreading gossip." Rain yells at his retreating back.

Sky is awake and looking at his friend with a frown. Rain just shrugs and tells him to go back to sleep.
"I'll wake you up for the next class." He says while stroking his friend's back.

He sends a quick text to Phayu and Prapai telling them that he found the culprit and he took care of it.

He smiles at Phayu's reply.

'That's my boy.'