Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Doctor Kirraman?" A voice pipes up from across the counter. Caitlyn looks up from the chart to see a young nurse, one of a dozen she's seen around the unit today. She doubts more than one will last a year.

"Yes?" Caitlyn asks, looking over the rim of her glasses.

"Sorry, still learning names around here." The nurse says, sliding her a manila folder. "Your new admit is here."

"Give me the rundown." Caitlyn replies, flipping to the tab in the folder marked for labs.

"Patient is a 47 year old transgender woman, assigned male at birth, admitted in the ER last night for what's thought to be a stroke. Patient has a history of brain cancer, and hasn't been conscious or responsive since she's been here. On a ventilator as we speak."

"I'm not seeing specifics here on her medical history." Caitlyn notes, seeing how bare bones the chart really is.

"We're waiting on the patient's medical records, apparently they've got quite a bit to sort through at the oncology clinic she's been going to. Long family history. Everything I have is from the home health nurse. Looks like brain cancer, the nurse mentioned something about side effects of meds she was on as a kid. She's been on a downward slope for a while now. The pacer in her chest is probably the only thing that kept her alive long enough to even get to the E.R.. Looks like she was going through the process of getting set up for hospice, but the partner was dragging her feet, hadn't quite gone through with it before all this happened." Caitlyn sighs and shakes her head.

"So instead of dying at home she's braindead in one of our beds. Did they not factor the hospice care into her being admitted?"

"They did, but the partner is... Pushy." Caitlyn quirks a brow. "From the sounds of it, she threatened legal action, and also to break the E.R. doctor's knees."

"Wonderful." Caitlyn sighs and can already tell this is going to be a migraine inducer. "Well, suppose I should lay eyes on the patient then. Anything else of note so far?"

"Nothing yet. Apologies doctor, every facility we contact has been acting strange when we reach out for this woman's records, or I would have more to report."

"Not to worry, I understand. Just notify me when we have more to go off of." The nurse nods and Caitlyn makes her way to the listed room number. She knocks on the glass door to the room, and hears a cough on the other side. Caitlyn hears the ventilator hissing from the hall.

"Come in." A gruff woman's voice responds, and Caitlyn can hear the fatigue in it. She slides open the door and the privacy curtain, to see an all too familiar face sat in the bedside chair.

"Violet?" Caitlyn says before she can think. She changed a lot in the 25 years since they'd last seen each other. The years hadn't been kind to her.

Her face is carved with the type of worry lines and wrinkles that marked a rough life. Some Cait remembers, like the scar across her lip she said came from a bad run in with a foster parent when she was in her late teens, but so many more were new. There was one scar in her eyebrow that looked especially nasty.

Her hair was trimmed short with just enough for it to be slicked back. It was almost entirely grey at the temples, giving her a salt and paprika esc look. Deep black bags hung under her eyes like a noose under gallows, giving away her lack of sleep.

Her clothes were disheveled, old work pants and a pale blue T-shirt clung tight to her flat chest. Her old canvas jacket was stained with God knows how many colors.

"Well shit, guess med school worked out for you, then." Vi says without thinking, trying to wipe the tired from her eyes as she sits up straighter in her chair. "Sorry, I mean uh... Hello, Doctor." She shrugs, like that's all she has to give.

Caitlyn should walk away. She should leave and be done with this. With their history, it'd be an ethical nightmare for her to continue.

But she just sighs. She'd cared for Violet once, a long time ago, and God forgive her, the butch looked absolutely pitiful.

"No, you're fine. From the sounds of things, you’ve been through quite a bit. I just came to do my assessment." Vi nods.

"Of course. Do I need to leave the room or anything?"

"You're fine where you are. If you want to step out, you're okay too, but I do have some questions if you're able to answer."

"Of course." It’s only then that Cait notices her hand hasn't left the patient's bed the entire time they've been speaking, clasped onto the hand of the woman laying there unconscious, one calloused thumb rubbing along her knuckles.

God Caitlyn hadn't seen Jinx in decades.

She looks so much more peaceful than the last time they saw each other. For all the difficulties the nurse described in her life, her face doesn't show it having worn her down.

Her skin is smooth and pale, giving her an almost ghostly, angelic look to her. It was only challenged by the thin blue veins tracing their way under her skin like a spider web. She was skinny, but not gaunt. Her hair is just a shade or two lighter than Caitlyn’s, and it's tied into two messy, disheveled braids that hang over the top of the bed.

Caitlyn starts with the basics, checking lungs sounds and vitals as she speaks again. "We're having trouble getting ahold of her medical records. I know she has been dealing with brain cancer. Can you give me any more details?"

Vi nods and clears her throat, thumb still tracing the woman's knuckles. "The cancer popped up about half a decade ago. We had some luck at first, chemo and stuff helped. She was in remission for a while, but it came back about 2 years ago.”

“The home health nurse reported some issues with medications as a kid?”

“Yeah, uh… She got into a lot of trouble when she was young. They put her on these pills some quack told em would make sure she was a good obedient little girl." Caitlyn can practically hear the gritting of Vi's teeth, the hand not thumbing Powder's knuckles clenched into a white knuckled fist. She breathes for a second before continuing. "From everything the docs have said, the medication even back then was known as something you don't stay on long term, and the buildup of it over years and years, made her a lot more at risk for, well, everything that got us here."

"I see." While checking her pulse, Caitlyn notices a tattoo along the inside of Powder's arm, wispy pale clouds, going up her inner forearm and around the elbow, disappearing into the sleeve of the gown. Had she not moved her wrist, oshe'd have missed it entirely.

“Here, I need to see her other arm. Tattoos like hers can interfere with the vein finder if we need to place another i.v. quickly.” Vi complies, moving her hand from Powder’s and allowing Caitlyn to see another tattoo of whirling gears and sprockets, this one trailing down her whole forearm, over the top of her hand, wrapping around her ring finger. There's a spot in the very middle that seems to have been sloppily filled in.“Hmmm, well, I suppose we will just hope this i.v. holds up. Must be quite fond of machines for a tattoo like that." She finds herself observing idley.

"She got it for me. Wanted one to match mine." Vi adds with a chuckle, rolling up the sleeve of her jacket to show a similar whirling gear tattoo on her right forearm.

“Still a mechanic, then?”

"Yes ma’am. Got myself a little shop out near the edge of the city. Quite the upgrade from being an oil jockey at your old man’s shop, eh?" Caitlyn chuckles, a bit amazed Vi has the energy for a joke.

"Quite so. Loris was irate at having to replace you." Vi tenses a bit, and her hand returns to holding Powder’s. It's then that Caitlyn notices the hand that isn't thumbing Powder's knuckles has its own embellishments of ink, whispy blue clouds just like the patient's forearm, drifting lazily over scarred knuckles to wrap around her ring finger.

"Yeah... I really am sorry about all that. Family needed help, and… well, you don't give up on family." Vi looks between her and Jinx on the bed, and Cait sighs.

"I didn't mean it like that, I swear. We have more to worry about now." Caitlyn pulls a penlight, and shines it in both of Powder's eyes, opening the lids with her fingers. No reaction, from her or her pupils, which stay a stagnent black island in the midst of an icy blue lake.

Caitlyn swallows hard and Vi's shoulders slump. "We have a standard course of tests we run on patients going through these kinds of situations. I'll get the orders placed and we can get those running. There's always hope." She tries to offer reassuringly, but she can read it plainly that her words fall on deaf ears.

"You don't have to lie to me, doc..." Her voice cracks before she can finish her sentence. "I know what this is. She saw it coming a long ways away… I just never had the stomach to face it like she could."

Caitlyn sighs and puts her stethoscope over her shoulders. "Would you like me to get our chaplain then? We could discuss a plan for-" for the end. That's what she wants to say, but the words don't manage to come out. Vi shakes her head, almost violently.

"No. Run your tests, All of em. If there's any fancy experimental shit you can try, try it." Caitlyn can't help but furrow her brow at the whiplash.

"Violet, the costs-" She's interrupted yet again.

"I don't care what it costs, do everything you can. If there's a sliver of a chance..." Vi hesitates for a moment, and Cait wonders if she even believes what she's saying until she sighs and shakes her head. "I need to Know, really know, beyond any shadow of a doubt. Or I... I could never forgive myself." She squeezes Powder's hand, and Caitlyn sees a tear snake down her cheek. “God, Isha is still away at school… the time will help. I know I don't really have much room to ask favors of you, but please, just… anything we can try.” Vi looks at her like she's begging for her own life.

"I'll get things ordered."

Vi nods. "Thank you." Her voice cracks again, and all Cait can offer is a pat on the shoulder.

"Of course. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Cup of cot and a coffee?" Vi says, before quickly correcting herself. It seems the hours were finally catching up to her.

"I'll have a CNA bring those down in a few minutes. Still take it black?"

"No, lots of cream and sugar if possible." Vi says, looking at Jinx with a tired smile, some inside joke Caitlyn doesn't get to know.

What else is new?

And so Caitlyn returns to her work. She does her rounds with the clinical team, works with the various students and doctors in their residencies, and finds herself being pulled to-and-from for the entire rest of the day.

It's several hours later the next time she even passes by her newest admit’s room, and by then Violet is sound asleep on a ragged old cot set up right alongside Powder’s bed, the two still hand in hand.

It seemed the insurance companies were determined to ensure testing for Jinx took as long as possible. Every test she tried to order required some sort of paperwork or prior authorization. She sat there, God only knows how many hours into her shift, filling out one form after another when she found her mind wandering.

She was 23, and barely at that. Still in her pre-med with an ungodly amount of homework to do and so little energy to do it. The university she’d chosen for her undergrad was nestled into a sleepy little town in Michigan named Thebes. Nonetheless, her family still managed to own a few businesses in the area. One such business was a quaint little diner that Caitlyn ate at far more often than she'd like to admit. It was the typical small town diner, obsessively themed around the 50s, soda shop aesthetic right down to the paper hats and the jukebox.

Caitlyn sat at a table, books splayed out with a mostly eaten plate of eggs and toast in front of her. It couldn't have been earlier than 11 at night, the entire diner was a ghost town save for a few truckers stopping on their way through.

Caitlyn chewed on a piece of toast, her eggs just finished. She was reading about advanced lung cancer or something like that when she got the strangest sense of being watched.

She looked up from her book to see Violet’s eye fixed on her, paused half way through bussing a table across the diner. She looked pale and startled, and Caitlyn had to look back over her shoulder to ensure there wasn't a ghost behind her. Nothing to be seen, she turned back to the woman.

Caitlyn quirked her brow questioningly as they made eye contact, and Vi snapped her head away, looking back at her table. Her hair was long and shaggy, more akin to some grunge drummer than any ladylike haircut. It was pulled back into a messy ponytail that showed a cigarette tucked behind her ear. Her smock was dirty to a frankly concerning degree, and the tight black T-shirt she wore didn't seem to fare much better. Cait could see seams under her shirt, owed to her binder.

Caitlyn didn't make much of it. She didn't recognize the butch, so it was likely she was just some fresh hire who was scared to see the owner’s daughter in the building. She returned to her studies and toast.

A few minutes later, Vi swung by her table, swiping her empty plate away. “Need anything else?”

“I thought you were a busser. Shouldn't the waitress be the one asking me that?” Caitlyn asked, absentmindedly, still reading.

“Yeah, well I'm pretty sure our waitress is in the deepfreeze with the line cook. So I think you'll have to settle for me for the moment.” Vi said, and the brazenness of it all caught Caitlyn so off guard she couldn't help but laugh. It was the worst, cackling little laugh that always made her self conscious, but Vi just chuckled along with her.

“You must not know who I am if you're going to rat on your coworkers so easily.” Caitlyn observed, looking for a name tag on Vi's shirt and seeing none.

“You must not be used to being subtle, if you're willing to ogle me when I'm looking right at you.” Caitlyn guffawed at the insinuation as Vi continued. “But no, I don't know you from Eve. Why, should I?” Caitlyn, still reeling from the previous barb, had to fight the urge to scoff.

“Caitlyn Kirraman.” She said, offering her hand, grinning smugly as she added “my father owns this diner.”

“Violet Dollanganger. Friends call me Vi.” She replies, shaking Caitlyn's hand with a firm grip and calloused fingers. Even then, Caitlyn noticed scars on her knuckles. “And uh, please don't rat on my coworkers about the deepfreeze bit. Ekko is a good dude, and Skye is a real sweetheart.”

“You're the one bandying their business around to customers.” Caitlyn pointed out with a chuckle, leaning back into her seat. Violet chews her cheek.

“To be fair, all the prissy college girls tip well if you give em some juicy drama.”

“Prissy?” Caitlyn asked, appalled. “You certainly are good at putting your foot in your mouth. How did you even manage to get through the interview here?”

“I'm one of the only people in this town that isn't either going to or working at the college.” Vi points out with a smug chuckle. “You can get away with a lot if you're the only option.”

“Are you really willing to test that?”

“Nope, but I'm already this deep in, so I figure, might as well just keep digging and see if I can pop out on the other side of the world.” Vi said, setting her massive bucket of dishes on an unoccupied table, leaning against it and crossing her arms.

“I see. Well, if the line cook is occupied, I guess I'll have to settle for some coffee.”

“I can bring food if you want. It's a stovetop, not rocket science. And I'm not too bad of a cook.”

“Hmmm, fine. I'll take a steak and fries.” Vi arched a brow at her.

“After all those eggs?” Caitlyn shot her a look and Vi swallowed. “How do you want that steak?”

“Rare, but not blue. And please, for the love of God, season it well.”

“Coming up.”

Caitlyn returned to her studies and after some time reading about intracranial pressure variance, Violet reappeared with a plate stacked tall with fries and a cheap cut of steak typically seen in a diner.

Vi set it down and was about to walk away when Caitlyn held up a finger. “Wait just a moment. I wanna see if this holds up to your boasting before you scurry off.” Caitlyn cut into the steak, at the very least it looked properly cooked. Not too blue that it should still be mooing, but not dry like it could've turned out.

Caitlyn popped it into her mouth, and she could see Vi's hand twitch in anticipation.

Caitlyn looked at Vi as she swallowed the bite, relishing seeing the smartass nervous.

“Alright, I'll admit, you’ve impressed me.” Caitlyn said, crossing her legs under the table. “But, you missed something.”

“What?” Vi asked, looking back at the steak.

“My coffee.” Caitlyn couldn't help her grin. Vi rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“How d’you take it?”

“Black, and brewed strong. Bring an extra mug.”

“Gotcha, still a cheap shot. My cooking is fuckin delicious.”

“It's good for diner food.” Caitlyn specified.

“Well that's cus I have diner grade ingredients.” Vi quipped back.

“It's a poor chef who blames their ingredients.”

“Yeah well, poor is exactly how I’d describe the ingredients your old man makes us stock.” Vi shot back. Caitlyn can remember the little crooked smile she wore back then, all bravado and confidence. Oh so pleased with her little joke.

“The coffee?” Caitlyn reminded, and Vi grinned as she walked back to the kitchen. A few minutes later, she returned with two mugs and a fresh pot of coffee. Just from the smell, Caitlyn could tell it was brewed strong. “Good. Now sit, and take these.” Caitlyn slid her a stack of note cards.

“Excuse me?” Vi asked with a quirked brow.

“No, you're not excused. I said sit. I need help with these cards, and unless I'm mistaken there's no tables needing bussed at the moment. Though if you want anything for your coffee, grab it now.” Vi stared at her for a moment, some debate boiling in her head for a moment before she finally took her seat. She poured herself a cup of coffee and sipped it. She removed a flask from her apron and poured a shot or two in.

“Guess I can't go pissing off the boss’s daughter. But uh, we can just call this my lunch break.” She offered as her excuse, taking the stack of flash cards and showing her one.

“Good thinking. Tardive dyskinesia.” Caitlyn answered.

“Is that how you pronounce that?” Vi asked, showing the card. “Fucking hell.”

They sat there for the better part of two hours, well into the return of the waitress. She seemed confused, but Caitlyn recognized the girl and she knew who Caitlyn was, so she was smart enough not to disturb them.

The first hour was occupied by studying. The second, markedly less so.

“What the fuck is an anal prolapse?” Vi asked incredulously as she read the title of the card.

“A very unpleasant conversation topic.” Caitlyn replied over the rim of her coffee mug before taking a sip. Vi flipped the card over and read the definition before going pale and putting the cards down.

“What kind of fucked up degree are you going for?”

“Pre-med, and it's not “fucked up”. It's an essential part of ensuring people receive proper care that I understand these sorts of symptoms.”

“So what, you're going to be an ass doctor then?” Caitlyn rolled her eyes.

“No you neanderthal. And the word is proctologist. I'm not sure exactly where I'm going just yet. I want to specialize in neurology, people's spines and brains and such, or perhaps Oncology.”

“I know that one. My old man saw one of those when I was real young. Cancer doc, right?”

“Yes, correct. Was your father older? It's surprising he would need that kind of care so young.”

“Not sure. Might have just been a scare. Never told me what it was about. I was only a kid back then and uh… he passed not long afterward. Nothing to do with cancer, though. A bad fire in our apartment.”

Caitlyn was flabbergasted by the ease with which Vi said that, as if she were commenting on the weather.

“I'm so sorry for your loss.”

“Don't be. I've had a long time to get over it. Shit happens, the world is fucked up like that.” Vi said with a shrug, downing the last of her mug and topping it off.

“What about your mother?”

“Didn't make it out either.” Vi admitted.

“Did you have any siblings?”

“Look, I really would rather not talk about this anymore. Tell me about you.” Vi gestures at her and leans back in her seat. “Kirraman is a big name. How'd you end up in this Podunk shithole?”

“I'll have you know we have one of the best premed programs in the world here in this “Podunk shithole”. And it's a very nice town if you give it a chance.”

“Yeah but I know for a fact you’re not planning to stay here once you're done with that program. I'm only here cus my brothers asked me to come.” Vi said pointedly, and she did indeed have a point.

“Well, no. I wasn't.” Vi grinned at her.

“So, why medicine? Name like yours, I'm sure you could land some cushy corpo gig with your daddy’s business. You’d make a tidy living and never have to work a hard day in your life.”

“Because I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like much of a life at all.”

“Agree to disagree. The shit I would do for that kind of “fuck you” money is unreal.”

“I want to help people, really help people, not just donate to a few charities. Medicine lets me do that.”

“Well, that's admirable. Fuckin hate charity. Spent most of my life in foster homes and I'd see all these big rich guys donating to this or that charity. “Oh this 10 million dollar donation will help so many foster families have a merry Christmas” or some feel good horse shit. Meanwhile, nothing changes.” Caitlyn chuckled at the snobby voice Vi impersonated, and that seemed to draw a smile out of her.

“It's all for tax breaks anyway. You donate a few million, and save several times that come the end of the year.”

“Aren't you worried about getting whacked over spilling the secrets of the wealthy and powerful?” Vi teased, taking another sip of her coffee.

“Unlikely. Besides, who cares what some busboy in a “Podunk shithole” college town knows?” Vi chuckled at that and shook her head.

“Ouch, that one hurt. But, fair.”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“What do you want to do with your life? I can't imagine the diner is exactly your life's work.” Caitlyn gestured to the 90’s style faux 50’s aesthetic surrounding them. Vi sighed and stared at her coffee for a moment, like she was hoping she'd find the answer in the grounds at the bottom of the cup.

“I'm not quite sure. It's kinda why I'm here. Didn't have time to think about the future when I was in the system. Mostly just focused on keeping myself sane and alive. I had some ideas, but they were never really planned out all that well, and they kinda fell through last year. Ekko, the line cook, he's like family to me. He came out here to get into trade school. So now… I don't know, I guess I'm kinda trying to figure out what's next for me from here.” Vi shrugged and took another drink of her coffee.

“Are you good at anything?” Caitlyn asked. “Besides cooking a diner steak.” She clarified, only to receive a smug grin in response.

“I'm good at quite a lot of things.”

Caitlyn couldn't help but roll her eyes. “Flirting clearly not being one of them.” Vi faked offense.

“Why I never! I have no idea what you are talking about. I’d never dream of flirting with an heiress so far above my station.” Vi said in what she probably thought was a good impression of Caitlyn's accent, a hand pressed dramatically to her forehead as if she might faint.

Caitlyn kicked her under the table and the act fell away. Vi settled back into her leisurely lean in her chair as she continued. “Relax princess, I was meaning like, practical skills. I'm decent with a tool box when it comes to grunt maintenance. Worked a lot of under the table construction gigs when I was a teenager. Mechanics is my specialty though. Had a good gig fixing up cars for a while when I started living with this family that owned a junkyard. But never bothered to look into working an actual shop.” Vi said with a shrug.

“I could see you being a rather good fit for a mechanic.”

“Can't tell if that's meant to be a compliment or a dig.”

Caitlyn hears a call light off in the distance.

“It was a compliment.” Caitlyn specified, and Vi grinned from ear to ear.

“Well thank you. But like I said, still figuring out if that's where I want to go in life. Besides, I don't even know how to get started actually doing that as a career.” Vi shrugged.

“Keep it in mind. I mean, seeing how lacking your customer service skills are, maybe an auto shop would work better for you.” The waitress giggled at Caitlyn’s barb, and Vi was quick to reply.

“Hey Skye, don't you have something to go track down in the deep freeze?” The waitress glared at Vi before walking back into the kitchen area.

“Maybe I could get you a job at the shop here in town. My father owns it as well.” Vi looked at her, eyes squinted in suspicion.

“I told you, Hun, I'm not one for charity.”

“I never said it would be for your sake. Clearly your customer service skills being what they are, it'd be a benefit to my father to get you under a car rather than gabbing on with his clientele.” Caitlyn offered teasingly. Vi still didn't seem to trust her, but she seemed to calm down slightly.

“I mean, It’d sure beat having to work here. Ekko is only here to pay his way until he gets through trade school enough for the on-the-job training bit.” Caitlyn went to drink more coffee, but found her cup empty. She held the empty mug out toward Vi, who was already in the process of pouring herself another cup.

Vi went to pour the cup, but the table wabbled a bit, moving Cait’s arm, resulting in Vi dumping at least half a cups worth of lukewarm coffee directly into Caitlyn’s lap.

The two shot up from their seats in a mess of swear words and napkins. Vi apologized profusely, hesitant to try and help Caitlyn pat herself dry.

“Fuck, I'm so sorry.” Vi said as Caitlyn finished drying it to the best of her ability.

“No, no you're fine. It happens. It's late, you're tired, I get it. Don't worry, your job is safe.” Caitlyn assured.

Caitlyn hears a call bell ring in the distance.

“Thats not what I'm fuckin worried about. Let me make it up to you. Anyway I can. Got a car that needs fixing or something?” She offered half heartedly, seeming to have realized how uninspired that sounded mid sentence.

“No, I ride a bicycle on and off campus.”

“Cool, cool, eco friendly and shit.” Vi chuckled nervously to herself, scratching the back of her head. “Seriously though, that shit looks expensive, and ruined, let me do something to make up for it.”

Caitlyn thought for a moment, and made a decision. “Fine. You said you're a good cook when you're properly equipped. Show me. Cook me dinner some time? A proper dinner that is.” Vi arched a brow at her, then smiled.

“Sounds good to me. You got a sweet tooth?”

“I do in fact. I'm quite fond of cupca-”

Caitlyn hears the call bell go off again, snapping her attention from her recollections and back to the inside of the hospital she currently calls her prison. No nurses or CNAs are sat at the nurses station, and Caitlyn realizes it's shift change for both teams. She, unfortunately, still has several hours in her shift.

But, she decides to step up and be a good team member. She walks down to the light, if only to ensure it's not something urgent.

She knocks on the door to Powder’s room and hears a groggy “come in” from Violet. She finds Vi back in the chair beside the bed. Her salt-and-Paprika hair is messy and unkempt. “Oh, hey doc. Sorry, I just needed a hairbrush. I tried using the comb I found in the bathroom supplies but uh, it broke.” Vi holds up two pieces to a cheap plastic comb.

“Here, I don't think we have anything in storage, but I have a brush I keep in my locker for my own emergencies.” Caitlyn retrieves the brush and hands it to Vi.

“Thank you. Her hair can be a bit… unruly.” She stands and walks over to Powder’s bed. Caitlyn sees one undone braid hanging loose, the other still intact but messy. “She loves her long hair, especially after starting treatment, but can’t stand it being in her face. It's been that way since she was a kid. Even her bangs drive her crazy if they get too long.” Vi chuckles quietly to herself, slipping behind the bed as she starts brushing out the undone braid.

“Since she was a kid?” Caitlyn can't help but notice that comment, eyes flitting to the door where some nurses are walking past and back to Vi. “You two must have known each other quite a long time.” Vi's eyes shoot up to meet Caitlyn’s, and she smiles for just a second before returning to her brushing.

“Sure did. We grew up in this little mining town called Zaun. Most everyone we knew lived in the same apartment building close to the mines, and it was the type of town where everyone knew everyone.” Vi shakes her head. “She was my best friend growing up, kind of my only friend, besides Ekko. The fire, it didn't just hit my parents. The whole apartment building went up in smoke. Powder was sleeping over in my room when it all went down.”

Vi choked on the smoke as she woke up. She could feel it tearing at her airway as she lurched out of her bed, falling onto the ground and dragging the soft flannel bedspread off with her. Powder was barely 4, now in the bed alone.

Vi heard screaming in the distance, muffled by the walls, the smoke and the roaring of flames. She couldn't understand why everything hurt so badly, her lungs, her body, her eyes, everything was in pain. She ran to the door, and the knob was so damn hot she has to yank her hands away before she could even try to turn it. She only realized years after the fact that probably saved both their lives.

“Mommy! Daddy!” She screamed, tears tearing at her eyes. It was getting harder to breathe already. She barked out a cough, choking as dark clouds flooded her lungs. She tried the door again, but couldn't get past the pain, thank God.

“Fi?” Powder whimpered from the bed, wiping her eyes. She looked around, confused, and starts to curl into herself. “W-whats going on?”

“I don't… I don't know…” Vi choked out, coughing harder.

“Fi, I'm scared.”

“I'll fix it.” Vi ran to the window as her last hope. But it had been painted shut long before they ever got there. They hadn't been able to get them open the last two summers, no matter how hard they tried or how hot the apartment got. That day was no different.

She slapped at the window with a weak hand, then a sloppy fist, unsurprisingly failing. She grabbwd the biggest book off the shelf, “Bible” written across the front in ornate gold, and flung it into the window, only for it to bounce off with a weak thud.

She grabbed the next thing she saw, a little brown box, metal and wood, painted in light blue and white clouds. Their mom had kept trinkets in it when Vi was Powder's age. Now it was just clutter. Vi gripped it in her hands and ran at the window, hitting it with everything she could.

The glass cracks.

“Fi, stop! Mommy will be mad!” Powder sobbed, curled in a ball on the bed, smoke in her eyes leaving tears rolling down her cheeks. Vi smashed the window on her fifth hit, her arms screaming at her in exhaustion. The box clattered out of her hands and the window onto the ground below. Vi gasped for fresh air, but she could feel the heat getting worse.

“Powpow, come here!” Powder wouldn't move, frozen in fear. Vi clamered over the tiny bed to her, grabbing her and trying to pull her up onto Vi’s back.

“Fi, I'm scared!” Powder sobs as she tries to squirm from Vi's grasp.

“Powpow, I need you to trust me.” Vi begged, grabbing Powder’s hands. “I promise, I'll keep you safe. I'll always keep you safe. But you need to trust me.”

Powder stared at her, but she nodded. Vi pulled her on like a backpack, carrying her sister to the shattered window.

The shards of glass on the bottom of the windowsill tear into Vi’s knuckles as she tried to get a grip to pull them through. She let out a cry, before she can stop it.

“Fi?” Powder asks from her back, tears dripping down her chin onto her sister’s shoulders. Vi hid the wounds as best she couls, forcing herself forward. The glass carved a gash into her shirt and chest, into the knuckles and palms of her hands, into her shins.

But then they're out, falling onto the foliage outside their window, next to a popped open keepsake box, along with the lighter and scattered garbage that had filled it.

Vi heard something in the distance, screaming.

She grasped for what she could, Powder, the box, and the lighter. She pulled them all to her chest and dragged herself out of the bushes.

She made it maybe 15 feet before she collapsed. The screaming was only getting louder. Powder sobbed, choking and gasping in her arms, as Vi realized in horror that she recognized the voices.

She heard her name, and Powder’s. She heard her parents screaming.

Vi covered Powder’s ears with her bloodied hands as the screaming got louder and louder, until it felt like it was shrieking directly into her head. Powder tried to pull away, but Vi held her hands over her ears until the screaming stopped. Blood dripped down Powder’s cheeks.

“Fi?” Powder asked from her chest.

“It'll be okay Powder. I'll keep you safe. I promise.” She replied, unthinking, staring at the flames as they poured out of the bedroom window they had crawled out of. Vi watched the blaze lick away any trace of the blood they'd left there to ash. Vi coughed her lungs out. She could remember the feeling of the smoke clinging inside her chest.

A pair of double doors were thrown open in the distance, a choking, coughing man with short cropped black hair stumbling out, followed by a small crowd of other survivors. He saw them and rqn to them.

“Violet! Powder! Thank God you two are okay.” Silco choked out as he pulled them into his arms. “Violet, where are your parents? Ekko? Benzo?”

Violet just stared into the flames, blinding muttering to powder that she'd keep her safe.

“Ekko was being raised by his uncle at the time… the three of us lost everything. Me and Powder were lucky at first, got shipped to the same orphanage. Ekko ended up out in Colorado.” Vi speaks as if she doesn’t even realize the words are still coming out of her mouth, focus solely on the hair in her hands as she brushes it out and starts to braid. “I'm sorry, this isn't important. You probably have a ton of shit to do. I shouldn't keep you. I'll uh, I'll find you when I am done with the brush.”

“No, no Vi you're fine. If you need to talk, I'm here.” Caitlyn assures, holding up a small pager. “I've got this if anyone needs to contact me. You're not interrupting.” It’s a lie, she knows that. Caitlyn has no idea why she hasn't done the smart thing and notified her supervisor of a need to reassign this particular patient, but here she still is, despite everything.

Vi chews her cheek and nods. “Okay… Thank you. It's hard, not having anyone to talk to. She's been the one I told everything the last 25 years, and now…” Vi swallows hard, and Caitlyn pretends not to see the tears.

“Want to tell me more? You never told me about your childhood when we were…”

Vi smiles. It's a sad, tired small but it's something. Caitlyn isn't a good therapist, but this woman is a friend, right? She had been, once. She'd been so many things once.

If nothing else, she was the family of a patient, and Caitlyn prides herself on her bedside manner. She has to at least try. Though she can just hear the ethics board throwing a fit over this in her head.

“Yeah… she uh, she and I were in the same orphanage, like I said. It was the one nice thing, having her there with me. She was shy as a kid, didn't like people and people just didn't seem to like her. Did I ever tell you about the time I first hurt someone? You know, on purpose?” Caitlyn shakes her head no. “Yeah I guess I probably wouldn't have huh… well, I was 8, Powder was maybe 5. We'd only been in for a little while by then…”

Violet sat on the bark in what could charitably be called a playground, but more accurately was called a death trap unfit for human usage. Loose bolts, splinters, and stabbing hazards abound. It was a shoddy neighborhood park next door to the orphanage that they called home, which was in about as good of a state. She had a god awful bowl cut and held an old battered copy of a book about King Arthur. Powder scribbled crayon on paper on the concrete, each stroke carrying the texture of the rock into her doodles.

“Fi, look!” Powder said, holding up her paper to show a doodle on her page.

“Oooooh, good pirate! He's got a nice hat!” Vi said over the top of her book.

“No silly! It's a monster Look, that's his teeth.” Powder said, pointing to what Vi had assumed was hair. “There's blood on em!” Vi had assumed it was very colorful hair.

“Oh, uh, It's great Powpow!” Vi lied, looking back to her book as Powder beamed at her. Vi felt her stomach rumble and looked around to find the decrepit old crone that had been tasked with keeping them alive. “Stay here. I need to poop.” Vi said, awkwardly pushing herself out of the bark.

“Miss Gracy says you should say you're going number two.” Powder corrected, proudly.

“Fine, I need to poop number 2.” Vi said, walking to the other side of the playground.

She still couldn't find that old lady who was supposed to be watching them. She saw a few boys, maybe a couple years older than her, off playing in the grass, but not the actual chaperone. But Vi figured if she wasn't there to see them, she wouldn't be there to get mad at Vi for walking off.

Vi knew something was wrong when she walked out of the bathroom and everything was quiet. The boys who had been roughhousing in the grass were gone. Vi worried she had been left behind, and ran back to where she had left Powder.

By the time she got there, one of them was holding Powder's drawings overhead while Powder hopped uselessly, not even coming up to his elbows at the highest point “Give it back! That's mine!” She yelled from the middle of the group, tears already welling in her eyes.

“Oh what, gonna cry about it crybaby?” one boy asked, dangling the paper over Powder’s head.

“Go ahead, cry over your little monster you freak.” Another boy jeered.

Vi stomped up to one boy and tried to shove him. “Leave her alone you jerk!” The boy turned to face her and shoved her over with a single hand as if she weighed nothing.

“Dude, whatever. You two weirdos creep me out.” He said, turning back to Powder and the others. “Come on guys, this blows.”

The tallest one sighed. “Yeah, these freaks are no fun.” He said as he tore Powder’s drawing and threw it on the ground. Powder only cried harder, trying and failing to punch him in the leg. “Don't fucking hit me you runt.” He said, smacking Powder in the back of the head, sending her stumbling onto the ground, her face hitting the concrete with a wet crunch as she cried even louder.

Vi saw red. She reached for something, anything, and came back with a rock. It was big and seemed to always want to tip her over to one side of the other, but Vi managed to keep control of it just long enough to run at the tallest boy and heave it square into his kneecap. The boy went down with his own sickening crunch, hollering in pain like Vi hadn’t heard before. A folding knife clattered out of his pocket and onto the ground at Powder's feet.

While the other boys were freaking out, Vi snatched up the knife and tried to grab Powder and run, but her sister was clutching her face, blood pouring out of her nose, and in all the commotion, the chaperone finally decided to make herself seen.

“Fi?” Powder asked, stepping into their room a few hours later. Her trouble pronouncing Vs wasn't helped by her injured nose.

“Yeah Powpow, what's up?”

“You didn't go to dinner…”

“Yeah, I'm in trouble, remember?”

Thanks to Powder being inconsolable, and being outnumbered three to one, the chaperone deemed Vi the trouble maker and told her no dinner for a week, and increased chores for a whole month.

“I know… but…” Powder walked over to Vi's bed, and pulled a napkin out of the pocket of her skirt. Inside was a few slices of some sort of mystery meat, and a single chocolate kiss. “Thank you. I'm sorry I couldn't help.”

“Of course, Powpow. Just be careful, this could get you in big trouble.”

“Don't worry! I was really sneaky. No one saw.” Violet smiled from ear to ear and scarfed the meat down. It was half cold, and hard, and the chocolate had melted on it, but she wouldn't have traded it for anything in the world.

After she finished the food, Powder set a small piece of paper on the bed in front of her. Vi opened it to see one of Powder’s doodles.

“That's a great monster, Powpow.” VI said with a grin.

“No silly, it's you! You’re a knight, like in your book.” Vi looked at the scribble again from another angle, and still couldn't see it. Too many limbs, too many colors. Jinx points at one part. “That's you, that's your hair, and that's me behind you.”

“It's great, Powder.” Vi said as she finally managed to see it, like one of those weird posters where you have to cross your eyes for it to make sense. Powder fidgeted with her fingers for a moment.

“Can I stay with you?” Powder asked. Vi lifted the blankets up, and powder climbed right in alongside her. Just like she had every night since they'd gotten there. Just like they would every night after until they were torn apart.

Vi felt the pocket knife pressed between her hip and the bed.

She'd keep her sister safe, she swore to herself.

Of course she doesn’t say that part out loud to Caitlyn. Caitlyn smiles at Vi, who is just about finished with the first braid. “You protected her. That's very sweet of you.”

“I had to. She was small, even for her age. She was quiet, and drew monsters, everyone thought she was crazy. But I mean, we can look back now and see what it was, just a kid with trauma trying to cope with something she never should've had to face.” Vi finishes the first braid with a hair tie and starts to undo the second. “Course it was a double edged sword. I kept her safe, but with how many fights I ended up in, I got a bad reputation fast. Angry, violent older kids aren't exactly the first pick for adoptions. But Powder? She was a cute kid, quiet, no reputation other than the whole monster thing. She got snapped up quick.” Vi pauses her unbraiding to take a deep breath, trying to calm herself, but even then Caitlyn can still hear the icy edge creep into her voice. “She begged the family that adopted her, the Foxworths, to take me too. Begged and cried for hours, but they said I would be a bad influence.” She shakes her head. “Said I could hurt her, or someone else. Said they didn't want my bad attitude causing more harm than it already had.” By the end of that sentence her teeth are clenched so tight Caitlyn worries she will hear them crack.

Finally Vi lets go of the hair and steps out from behind the bed. “I can't braid while I talk about this. I’m gonna get pissed and accidentally yank or something.” Vi collapses back into her chair, leaving the one braid finished and the other only half undone. Violet reaches out and clasps Powder’s hand in her own as she takes a steadying breath. “They managed to coax her out of our room while I was asleep.”

Vi didn't know why she woke up that morning. Something in her just knew Powder was gone. Maybe she felt that snake bitch Miss Gracey shaking Powder in her arms and it took her time to wake up and realize. Maybe she heard her talking to Powder, telling her they needed to talk about something. Maybe she felt Powder's crawl out of their shared bed in the orphanage dorms.

Either way, her eyes tore open to an empty room and an empty bed. Powder was gone, nowhere to be seen. Vi scrambled out from under the blankets, knife still in her pocket like it was most nights since she's gotten it. She stuffed her feet into her ratty boots and didn't even bother lacing them as she ran down the hall, hollering for Powder.

She ran into Clagor. He was a nice but awkward boy, and she stopped dead as she ran into his massive frame.

“Clagor, have you seen Powder?”

“Yeah, Gracey is standing with her out front. She's got a bag and everything. What happened, you sleep in again? You're gonna be late.”

Vi was already taking off down the hall to the front gates. The security guard, Marcus, hollered for her to stop as she ran toward the front door, but she was out before he could get his ass out of his seat.

Miss Gracy was 7 feet tall, all bones, and had a beak-like nose that Vi had never seen in any position other than being stuck up in the air. When Vi saw her, she was stood next to the loading and unloading zone of the parking lot with a scared Powder by her side, an iron grip on her hand even as the young girl struggled against her grip.

“Gracey, you dumb cunt, you're not taking her away!”

“Vi!” Powder squealed, finally wrenching her hand from Gracey’s grasp, running to Vi and all but jumping in her arms.

“Violet, we talked about this. I know you're upset, but there's nothing to be done. Everything is finalized.” The nasally bitch winged as she looked to Powder. “Powder, dear. Come here this instant.”

“Fuck you you raggedy bitch, you're not taking her away!” Vi shouted, stepping back as Gracey stepped closer. She reached for Powder and Vi slapped her hand away. Gracey looked aghast at her. At the same time a fancy looking car pulled into the loading zone, and Marcus finally hauled himself out of the front doors.

“God damnit, Dollanganger!” Marcus shouted as he stomped over to them. Powder clung to her chest as Gracey spoke with a very large, very pissed off looking guy in a suit. Vi looked between the two and backed up as Marcus moved closer and closer. Gracey moved toward them, desperation in her eyes, and Vi felt the weight of the world falling on her.

They couldn't run, the whole campus was fenced in. They wouldn't be able to run into the building, the door would be locked and they’d need someone to buzz them in. She couldn't drive, so stealing the still-running car wasn’t an option.

Powder clung to her chest and Vi saw one way out.

“Powder, get behind me.” She whispered. Powder did as she was told, moving between Vi and the side of the building. Vi put up her fists, and saw Marcus roll his eyes.

“Come on kid, can't you just be happy for her? Maybe if you were a little more grateful, your ass would be out of here by now.” Marcus said, arms crossed, foot tapping impatiently.

“You're not doing yourself any favors, Violet. Let Powder go, now.” Gracey prodded. Vi swallowed her fear and braced for a fight. Maybe, if she was lucky, she'd break the old bitch’s nose so bad she'd never be able to stick it up again.

“Fuck you, crone.” Vi spat.

“Marcus, handle her.” Gracey impatiently barked.

“On it.” He said, moving to step closer to her. He reached for Powder and Vi punched him in the elbow. “Son of a-” he grunted, reaching to snag her hand mid-air. He got a grip, but before he could do anything with it, Vi kicked him in the dick and put him on his knees.

The beefy henchmen-looking motherfucker in the suit walked past Gracey, shoving Vi aside like she weighed nothing, grabbing Powder under the arm as she screamed and swatted at him. “Let me go!”

Vi grabbed her hand and the two pulled each other closer as best they could. Marcus managed to get back on his feet, grabbing Vi around the waist and heaving until she finally couldn't keep her grip.

Powder slipped through her fingers, guided toward the car that would take her away.

“Get off me you asshole!” Vi screamed, arm outstretched toward Powder as if she could still grab her and keep hold. They stumbled backwards, falling on their asses, but Marcus kept his grip.

Vi grabbed the knife from her pocket, flicked it open with the thumbstud, and buried it in Marcus’s thigh. Blood splattered out from around the blade, and Vi caught some of it in her eyes. He screamed, letting her go, and Vi tried her best to haul herself to her feet.

Blood was thinner than she had expected it to be, but her vision was blurred by it nonetheless. She tripped over her own feet, falling to the ground, hands clutching at the dirt under her as she watched Powder be dragged away through a red haze.

Blood dripped down her cheeks, stinging her eyes. She could hear Powder's screams ringing in her ears.

“They took her away.” Caitlyn whispers out, looking between the two others in the room.

“Tore her right out of my arms there in the front yard.” Vi spat. “she was screaming and crying, begging me to stop them… and I just fucking couldn't.”

“You were a child.”

“I was all she had.” Vi corrected. “And I failed. They sent her off to meet the new family. I found out later they lived on basically the opposite side of the fucking country, some big mansion on the outskirts of Upstate New York.”

“And what happened to you?”

“Juvie. Not exactly easy to just ignore a kid stabbing the security guard. After that, I ended up in the foster system… you know most of my stories from there.”

Caitlyn nodded. She's heard quite a few of them when they'd been together. None of them had happy endings, and few had happy beginnings.

“We would be lucky if we were able to get in contact maybe once a year.” Vi says with a shrug. “Silco and Vander helped us where they could. They were family to us, even if not by blood. They tried to get custody of both of us, but just… never could get the courts to listen. Silco had a record, and Vander couldn't get them to look past the whole “faggot with a wrap sheet” thing, especially back then. But they were able to get the number of the family that adopted Powder from some court shit, and conveniently it ended up being passed on to me.”

“I’m glad you had someone. But if you had the number, why so little contact?” Vi shook her head and sighed.

“The family claimed she would have “behavioral issues” whenever we would talk. So they stopped letting me talk to her. It always boiled down to me being a bad influence for them.”

“Behavioral issues?” Caitlyn is dumbfounded by such a silly excuse.

“Remember what I said about the meds? Powder stopped being the sweetheart she is pretty quick after they tore us apart. She'd draw on the walls, break things, let the expensive dogs escape. Anything she could to raise hell, she did. Shrink told the family it was trauma and separation, but they just shopped around til some quack called it psychosis. They put her on pills that helped her keep calm and quiet. Guess whenever we would talk she'd start raising hell again even with the pills.” Vi runs her thumb along Powder’s knuckles, grinning with pride. “I say everything would've been a lot calmer if they didn't tear us apart. But that was their lesson to learn, not mine. Didn't matter though. We found our ways.”

“Must've been quite the challenge sneaking that around.”

“Oh you have no idea.” Vi said with a chuckle. “But I'm a master of subtlety.”

“Since when?” Caitlyn can't help but ask with a laugh.

“Excuse me! I can be very subtle when I need to be.”

“Oh please, you got caught 6 separate times trying to sneak onto campus to see me.”

“It took me a while to learn Security’s patrol routes, sue me!” Vi's defense however falls flat. “Okay, maybe it was more Powder that was the stealthy one. She'd find me on this or that website, message me, give me the number for her new cell phone. We'd talk for a few days until she got caught, then some time later she'd find me somewhere else. Her family would ban her from whatever site we were talking on, and six months later she'd have one of her friends send me a message with a new way to get in contact. I'd do everything I could to keep record of our messages. Whenever I missed her, I'd read them back over.” Vi smiles faintly, but it wavers at the end as tears gather in the corner of her eyes. “I'd have them memorized in a few weeks. Pretty sure, gun to my head, I could still recite most of em.”

Caitlyn is about to reply when her pager goes off, ringing out a quick tone as a nurse notifies her of another patients test results and a number to respond.

“Damn, Violet I'm-”

“Go ahead. Thanks for listening to me… it helped, a lot.” Caitlyn gives her best reassuring smile and stands up.

“I'm glad. I'll try and stop by tomorrow, when time allows.” She pulls her work phone free and dials the nurse who paged her, returning to her actual job.

“Hey, Cait.” Vi says before she leaves. “I’m sorry. I hope you know that. I never wanted things to play out how they did.”

Caitlyn can't even begin to process everything that means. But she nods, and walks out to talk with the nurse.

A while later, Vi finishes the last braid alone in the room. Well, not alone, but that's kind of the crux of the whole issue, isn't it?

Her hands left idle were never a good thing. So she decides to try and turn in for the night, again. The clock on the bedside table reads 2 in the morning.

“You’d be beating my ass if you knew I was staying up this late again. But I mean hey, at least I'm not smoking, right?” Vi tries to joke to Powder, to no response. She didn't expect one, but it still stings deep in her chest. She leans down, pressing a kiss to her temple, then to her lips. “Goodnight, Clouds. I love you.”

She collapses onto the tired old hospital cot. She's gotten used to them over the last few years, but this one feels especially worn down. The cancer ward, now that place had the good cots.

Vi wonders to herself absently if she could convince a nurse to snag her one from there, but thinks better of it. It feels silly, wanting to be comfortable at a time like this.

She makes it maybe 10 minutes into trying to sleep before she gives up. She reaches for her phone, swiping it open. Her notifications are flooded with a bunch of shit she can't bother to sort through. She sees confirmations from Ekko, Jayce, Mel, and Isha. That's all she cares about.

She swipes away and opens up her photos, going to the oldest folder on the phone. She's greeted by what feels like miles of pixelated screenshots. All several decades old. She flicks her thumb and watches the pictures scroll by. It comes to a stop in the middle somewhere random, and opens the photo as she begins to read the texts.

Vi was in middle school, more accurately she was running late for middle school.

She scampered down the stairs, hair still sopping wet and hanging limp in her face as she rushed to get ready.

“No running in my kitchen.” Grayson said over the rim of her coffee mug, and Vi stopped right away. Grayson did not need to yell or threaten to make herself heard.

“S-sorry Ma’am. Running late.”

“I can see that.” Grayson said looking at the clock. “If you run you should be able to make it. don't forget food.”

“Thank you ma'am.” Vi stuttered out as she quickly reached into the fridge, grabbing for a sandwich.

“If you keep sleeping through your alarms, I may have to take back Mylo’s old iPod. Can't have you staying up so late.”

“Understood ma’am. I uh… I was wondering if maybe I could have a uh, friend over after school tonight?”

Grayson raised a brow at Vi. She couldn't blame her. Friends weren't exactly a common occurrence for Vi. She'd been placed with Grayson and Milo over a year ago, and hadn't even really bothered to get to know anyone else for the first half of that. She couldn't count the number of homes she'd had to transfer out of before reaching the six months mark, so she made it a habit not to bother setting roots until after then.

Grayson sighed and looked at the calendar. “Hmmm, it's not a boy, is it?”

Vi grimaced. “Eww, no freaking way.”

“Language.”

“Sorry ma'am… but I mean, Milo has his tutoring group tonight, so I figured we wouldn't be bothering anyone. She’ll go home before dinner.”

Grayson thought on it for a moment and sighed. “I think that should work fine. But I'm not driving anyone home.”

“She lives close!” Vi assured, smiling from ear to ear. “Thank you ma’am!”

“Of course. And Violet?” She looked at the foster parent nervously, fear spiking in her that she'd already been caught.

“Yes ma'am?”

“Good for you. Now get going or else.”

Vi ran out the front door, managing to make it to the bus stop seconds before the doors shut on her. She slid through the aisle and found her spot tucked right in the very back.

“Dude, you can't keep cutting it this close.” Milo taunted, clapping her on the back as she took the seat opposite him. “Mom is gonna find out that you're staying up all night, playing on that damn phone.”

“It's not a phone, it's an iPod. Like, an old as hell one at that.”

“Whatever, man, it's got apps and shit, and whatever it is you do on that thing all night, it's gonna land your ass in hot water. Plus it keeps me up.”

“Fine, man, I'll turn the brightness down or something. Get off my shit. Don't go telling Grayson on me either.” Vi said, punching him in the shoulder.

“Dude, c'mon, you've been here like, a year now. It's cool to relax a little.”

“What else would I call her?” Vi asked. Milo raised his hands halfheartedly in surrender, but let the subject drop.

The next stop came and went, and a second later a mess of blue hair took the half-seat open besides violet, forcing the two of them into close proximity.

“Hi, Violet!” The girl said through a dopey grin, a little pride flag pin hanging off the strap of her backpack.

“H-hey, Jemma.” Vi tried to say without sounding too nervous. Clearly it hadn't been as successful as she thought, and Jemma looked between her and Milo questioningly.

“Did I um, y'know, interrupt you and your brother or-””He’s not my brother.” Vi interjected quickly, realizing she may have snapped too quickly as Jemma looked even more confused and Milo just looked bummed.

“S-sorry. Y'know, he's like, my cool room mate and stuff.” Vi offered as a pathetic excuse. Jemma just smiled back at her, the seat too small for the both of them, and Vi so unbearably nervous at that proximity. She could smell Jemma’s perfume, it smelled like apples and cinnamon.

“Oh, yeah, like, cool!” Jemma offered as a response, before deftly and subtly steering the conversation back where she wanted it. “So, did you talk to your uh, not-mom about me coming over?”

“Yeah, I did! She said you can come, just gotta go home by dinner.”

Jemma beamed at her, red creeping onto her cheeks, contrasting against the blue of her eyes, and Vi felt something tight and fluttery in her chest as she smiled back.

“Great!” She finally says, tucking her hair behind her ear.

They exited the bus, Jemma running off to her class as Milo and Vi went to theirs. “Dude, she's totally crushing on you.”

“Shut up!” Vi said, looking around the halls, pausing for a long moment before looking at her scuffed up hand-me-down boots. “You think so?”

“Oh dude, totally. Without a doubt. I may not know a lot of lesbians but like, if that's not gay then you're the pope.” Vi felt herself blush as Mylo shook her shoulder. “Good luck with your lil date tonight, Casanova. Casandranova? Is Casanova a gendered term? Do I need to be conjugating it like a verb in Spanish? Is casanova even spanish?” Milo wondered absentmindedly as they walk into class.

Vi met Jemma after school at the flag pole, tripping over her own feet immediately before reaching her and falling flat on her face. She pushed herself up and tried to play it as best she could, and Jemma just smiled at her.

“I was thinking we could walk?” She offered, along with a hand to help Vi up. “If you think you can make it that far.”

“Oh I totally can.” Vi said, just barely managing not to immediately trip again.

They got a block or two from school when Jemma pulled a lighter from her pocket. A few seconds later, she produces a pack of cigarettes.

“Where did you get those?” Vi asked as Jemma unwrapped the plastic from the pack.

“My big sister. She started smoking last year and I finally managed to convince her to get me some! I think she feels bad that she's going away for college soon. They taste awful but you get used to them.” Jemma put the cigarette in her mouth and lit it with a flick, offering the box to Vi.

“I didn't know you had a sister.” Vi observed, taking a cigarette from the box. Jemma held her hands out to light it between Vi's lips.

“Yeah, I talk about her like, all the time.” Jemma said absentmindedly as Vi choked on the smoke in her lungs.

“S-sorry. I uh, I thought you meant you had another sister.” Vi tried her best to cover her ass, half her words coming out between hacking coughs. But after a moment the coughing passed, and they continued walking.

“Right… so uh, do you have any siblings?” Jemma asked as they walked. Vi swallowed hard, chewing her cheek as she pulled the cigarette from her lips. She looked at it for a moment before putting it back and taking as long a drag as she could.

“kind of. I have a sister, but we haven't talked in a long time.”

Vi never handled pity well, and the look Jemma gave her spiked that anger like she hadn't felt in a long time. But Vi tried her best to hold it back, keep a level head. She looked at Jemma’s soft blue eyes, took another drag from her cigarette, and felt her nerves settle.

Her mind drifts to Powder, try as she might to avoid it. But she thinks better of it. She's with Jemma right now, she should focus on her. She takes another drag, feels the smoke in her lungs, the quiet burn of it, and breathes it out as she refocuses.

“-so that's when I told her it looked fugly, which she seemed to think meant fuckably ugly, don't know where she got that idea, and like, completely ignored my advice not to get it. But now that it's been sitting unused in her closet for like, a month, she wants to whine and complain and I'm like, girl I told you! You know?”

“Uh, yeah no that sounds crazy. What a hypocrite.” Vi responds.

“Totally.” Jemma finished her cigarette and tossed the butt in the nearest storm drain. Vi nursed hers for a lot longer, saving it for when her mind drifted back to Powder. “So, got any ideas for what electives you wanna take next year? I was thinking about becoming a library assistant.”

“I uh, hadn't really thought about it. I took auto shop this year, I've been really enjoying that.”

“Wow, very butch of you.” She said with a playful smirk.

“Is that a bad thing?” Vi asked.

“No, not at all. Butches are hot.” Jemma said, bumping their shoulders together. “Plus, they're like… the protectors of the community. Makes sense for you. Milo told me about that bully you beat up for taking his lunch.”

Vi took another drag. “You talked to Milo?” Jemma blushed beat red and looked away.

“Oh, yeah, you know, just uh, chitchatting. Not about you or anything. Cus you know, that'd be weird.” she laughed awkwardly, and Vi felt her face get warm. “So, like, what do you do in auto shop?” she asked, clearly trying her best to keep the conversation flowing.

Vi talked for a bit about this or that project and assignment, and Jemma did everything she was supposed to. She listened, asked her questions, smiled and giggled at the few times Vi would try and crack a joke, even when Vi knew they were probably shit.

Jemma was sweet. Looking back Vi could see how obvious she was about her crush. Maybe it was out of necessity, Vi was the only other out gay girl in the school at the time, even if Grayson wasn't aware of it yet. Vi had only come out at school because she'd been caught with a playboy she found out in the field behind the highschool. Milo had to be sworn to secrecy for that, and it was only after that that Vi really started to even bother getting to know him.

They got to Vi's foster house a few minutes after Vi had finished her smoke. They got inside to find the house empty, and Vi guided Jemma up to her and Milo’s shared room. Two twin sized beds occupied opposite sides of the room. Vi's side was neatly made, with her clothes folded up in neet piles in her duffel bag, and the few other personal items she had stashed neatly in a backpack right beside it.

Vi set her school bag onto the ground besides the other bags, and sat on the edge of the bed. Jemma did the same, politely placing her bag as the fourth in this line, and sitting beside Vi.

“So you wanna see the memes I sent you during class?” Jemma asked, pulling out her phone. It was years newer than Vi's third hand iPod. The two stretched out on their stomachs across the bed, vi up against the wall while Jemma laid next to her near the edge.

They scrolled through the different chat apps and social media they talked on. “God, why do you have so many of these accounts?” Jemma teased her as she opened the most recent chat.

“You never know what sites are good until you try em.” Vi justified.

“Dude, you have a Google plus account, nothing good comes from Google plus. Besides, you might wanna find a more anonymous username for your accounts then just your full legal name.” Jemma teased again, finally pulling up the memes. It was the generic shit from that day. Some guy getting hit in the nuts with a vacuum cleaner, a screaming goat that sounded like a dude, all that type of shit.

One video had them both cackling so damn hard that Jemma nearly fell off the bed, but Vi managed to catch her arm and keep her from falling. It was only like, a foot high drop, but the hit to the ego of a middle schooler would’ve been socially fatal.

“Th-thank you.” Jemma said, yet again bright red, the two were laying sideways, facing each other now.

“Oh um, of course.” Vi managed not to stutter out. She realized her hand was still on Jemma’s forearm and let go. Jemma seemed so disappointed.

“You have strong hands.” Jemma said absentmindedly. She reached out, dragging a finger along the top of Vi's arm.

“Thanks… you know, auto shop and stuff.” Vi said. Jemma laid her hand over Vi's, her fingers so much shorter and thinner than Vi's, so many fewer scars dotting them.

“Wow, your hands are so big…” Jemma absentmindedly commented, and Vi felt the back of her throat go dry.

“Gotta be, right? Like you said… protector.” Vi mumbled, feeling an icy reminder shoot down her spine, a voice whispering in her ear “not like you have ever protected anything that really mattered.”

She found herself craving another cigarette.

“Vi… can I kiss you?” Jemma asked, face so red it comically contrasted the blue of her hair. She didn't even look Vi in the eyes until vi responded “yeah. I-I’d like that.”

Vi leaned forward, just a few inches, and Jemma did the same. That all but closed the gap between them and Vi wondered how they'd ended up so close without her realizing.

Their lips were centimeters apart when Vi heard the front door close and Grayson shout down the hall “Violet, you have a letter! It's from someone named Powder.”

Vi all but jumped over Jemma to run out the door, unkissed and uncaring as she hurriedly mumbled “I'll be right back”. She rushed into the kitchen, grabbing the envelope from Grayson's hands.

“Calm down, child. It's okay, whats all the rush?” Grayson had seen Vi get excited for mail from Vander and Silco, but that was nothing compared to this.

Vi grabbed a butter knife and sliced the envelope open, careful to be sure not to damage it's contents.

It was a postcard, some bougie resort town bullshit, but Vi flipped it over to find nothing written but the name of some chat app and a username. Vi downloaded the app there on the spot, standing in the middle of the kitchen, lied her way through age verification, and started typing.

VioletDollanganger: Powpow? This you?

The reply came in second.
PowderGanger:Vi! Thank God it actually made it to you.
V: How the hell did you manage this one? I thought your parents checked all your outgoing mail after last Christmas?
P: dude, don't remind me of that.
V: I mean you were the one who thought “sending a letter to Santa” at 12 wouldn't be suspicious.
P:shut up, shut up, shut up!
V: Never. But seriously, how'd you manage this one?
P: bribery. My parents took me to this like, resort town and every chance I got I slipped away and paid the sketchy weirdos selling postcards an extra 20 if the sent it to Vander with a little note to send it to you. I sent like, 9 of them figuring at least one of the guys has to be decent enough to follow through.
P: do you have time to call? I have the house to myself for a little while longer. I miss your voice.
V: of course, Powpow.

The ringtone comes out of Vi's speaker faster than it should've taken for Powder to receive and read the text.

Vi hurriedly stepped out onto the back porch, praying the Wi-Fi was good enough for the call to hold. She breathed a nervous sigh and answeres, the postcard still stuck in her grasp.

“Powpow?”

“Oh thank God.” Powder said in response. “It's really you.”

“Of course. Accept no imitations.” Vi thought she was such hot shit for that line.

“Never. I was just… I don't know I was worried.”

“It's okay. I'm here. God it's nice to hear your voice. You sound like you're growing up!”

“You sound like a squeaky teenager.” Powder teased with a snicker.

“Hey, now that's a low blow.” Vi's voice decided that was the perfect moment to crack, and Powder giggled on the other end of the line. God, Vi couldn't remember the last time she heard Powder laugh. It makes her heart hurt. “How are you doing in school? Are you okay at home? Are you safe?”

“School is good. Math sucks, but I like English. I've been reading this book series from the 80s my teacher said she read when she was my age. It's something about these kids stuck in an attic, I'm just getting started tho. I've been doing a lot of art too. It's like, my favorite class, the teacher is completely sick of me bugging him during lunch so I can have more time to spend painting. We've been doing landscapes and every time I start doing a Bob Ross voice in my head while I do it.”

“But you're safe?” Vi asked, tension winding itself in her stomach as Powder hesitates.

“Yeah, yeah I'm safe. Safe is like, their primary concern here. Even if it means no fun. I do like, nothing but get driven to school, attend some classes, get driven home and then sit around waiting for school. Every time I say I wanna go do something it's always “no no, that's too dangerous, that's unladylike, that could get you hurt.” It's so annoying, but like, at least they're being misogynistic about it which is vaguely affirming if kinda shitty. I still get into trouble but it's okay, they don't hit me. Just yell. It's been better since they put me on these meds, I guess. That's what everyone says at least. I don't mind… they make the days go by a lot quicker, at least, right?”

Vi swallowed hard. “Okay, well… I'm glad you're safe. Have you heard from Silco or Vander?”

“No, not in like, a year. I think my parents are swiping their mail from me.”

“Bastards.”

“They're overprotective. I think they're afraid…” afraid she'll turn out like Vi. “You know what, I'm not letting them take up any more of this. I'm just glad you got my card. God, Vi, I miss you so much. How are things for you? Are you still in Pittsburg with Clagor? He seemed really sweet.”

“N-no, I uh, I got kicked out of there a couple years back. Got into a fight with a kid in the neighborhood. He uh, he took the keepsake box.”

“The one from home? With the clouds?”

“Yeah. Don't worry, I got it back.”

“That's good. The design was so pretty. I think about it all the time.”

“Me too.” Vi admitted.

“Do you have anything else from the old house?”

“Just Dad's old lighter. I still try and keep it maintained, you know…”

Powder gave a long "hmmm" before she responded. “You should send me a picture of it, the box and stuff. When we're off the call I mean.”

“Totally!”

“So, how’s your new place then?”

“Good. The lady who runs it is nice. This boy Milo is pretty cool, but he keeps acting weird when I don't call the lady mom. But it's a nice neighborhood. The school actually has funding, they've even got an auto shop! I've been taking it all year, I'm getting really good at it.”

“God that's so butch of you.” Powder teased.

“How the hell do you know that word?”

“I read, plus I have the internet, dweeb. Duh. I saw that profile picture you chose, you look like if Leslie Feinburg designed a sonic O.C. A real edgy one too.”

“Who the hell is Leslie Feinburg?”

“Google it later, that’s not important right now. Like I said, I've been reading like… a lot. But that really is great Vi. I'm glad you found such a nice place. Where is it?”

“Rhode Island.”

“Oh wow! That’s like, closer than you've ever been before!” Powder said excitedly, and Vi could just imagine the big goofy grin splitting her sister’s face.

They don't remark on the obvious, on the fact that no matter how close Vi is, she can't go to Powder, can't see her, can't hug her, can't be her big sister like she should be. No, that right was stripped away by some rich assholes “charitable donation” to the orphanage and an expedited adoption process.

“I know. Maybe one or two more placements, I'll end up right next door.” Vi fantasized idly.

“I mean, what if you ended up just staying there… it's just a few more years before you're, you know, out…” Powder said quietly. “It seems like you're doing well there. Maybe this is just the waiting game now. You know?” Powder offered, and Vi could hear her chewing her nails, as she always did when she was nervous. She was pitching some scheme to Violet that she just didn’t quite get.

“Yeah, maybe. Wait until I get all grown up, soup up some jalopy, ride in with the cavalry to bust you out of that posh shithole.” Vi offered.

“Always my knight in shining armour.” Powder whispered, and Vi couldn't help but think she sounded like her mind was miles away. “Can you do me a favor?”

“Of course, anything.”

“Send me a picture of you, along with the one of the box? Like, a good picture. Not that grainy one you have for your profile. I don't… I don't want to forget what you look like. I've been getting a lot more forgetful lately. My old man says it's just a side effect of my meds.”

“Of course. You should send me one too! I haven't seen you in years.”

“Of course, here let me…” Vi heard her tapping as Powder’s breathing got more distant. Vi did the same, pulling back and sending the best photo she had from her collection, mostly consisting of selfies taken in a dirty mirror. The one she sends is one Grayson sent her, a picture of her and Milo out on a hike in the mountains, Vi in an old flannel and paint splattered work pants she got from a thrift shop. She saw Powder’s picture, a gap-toothed grin painting her face along with her hair chopped to bits like she'd hacked at it with safety scissors, contrasting with the ungodly expensive looking dress and jean jacket she was wearing. Vi sent along a blurry photo of the keepsake box as well. “I promise I'll send a better one later.”

“You better, those clouds look like blue dogshit in this pic.”

“Powder!” Vi feigned offense to the language, and she heard Powder laugh as the back door opened behind her.

“What?! You swear like a sailor!”

“Yeah, but you're a kid, Clouds! It's different.”

“Oh so I’m Clouds now, huh? What happened to Powpow?”

“I'm allowed to give you more than one nickname, kid.”

“Oh c'mon, cut the “kid” stuff, I'm like 3 years younger than-” “Vi? What's up?” Jemma asked from behind her. Vi held up a finger as she heard something weird from the other side of the line.

There was clicking, and Powder swearing under her breath, and rustling like the microphone rubbing against fabric. Then she heard yelling, a woman's voice demanding to know who she's talking to.

“Vi, what the hell is-” Vi waved her off, pointing to the iPod in her grasp. She heard Powder begging someone not to take the phone right as she felt a wad of something hit her in the back of the head.

“I'm going home. I can't believe I thought this was a good idea.” Jemma muttered as she walked back into the house. Vi couldn't care less as she heard the line go dead, just as she heard Powder yelling her name into the line.

The last words Vi heard were Powder yelling “please don’t forget me!”

Vi listened on the dead line for several minutes after that, but there was nothing. The iPod had already gone to sleep by then. She fought the urge to fling it into the fence, but it's not hers, none of this is. Not this house, not this family, not this life.

She stuffed the iPod in her pocket, and looks behind her to see the pile of shit she'd been hit with before Jemma stormed out, mostly new pack of cigarettes.

She could probably catch up to Jemma. Run after her, apologize, explain. But something about that just felt equal parts humiliating and pitiful. She picked up the smokes, pocketed them, and walked up to Milo’s room.

The keepsake box was tucked in the very bottom of her personal bag. The blue and white clouds painted on the lid and body were starting to fade with age and wear. Vi took a picture of the box and went to send it, but was greeted with bold black text declaring “THIS USER NO LONGER EXISTS”.

Tears tore at her eyes, but she made quick work screencapping the messages and saving them so they don't get lost. She types out notes from what Powder told her over the phone, reading, art, painting, meds. She made a note to look up that Feinburg person.

She looked at the trinket box, lid cracked in half and super glued back together, and picked it up as she walked back down stairs.

“Your friend seemed upset.” Grayson observed idly, looking at Vi with that same fucking look she always gave when she was trying to get her to talk about her feelings.

“She's not my friend.” Vi mumbled, walking out back onto the porch, sitting back on her spot on the edge of the concrete. She set the box in the grass in front of her, opening it to show a near bursting stack of paper. At the top sat a rusted old Zippo lighter, and underneath that lay letters disguised as letters to santa, postcards, a few notepad pages that had lists of old usernames and her best summary of the phone calls they’d had.

She held the postcard from today in her hand, and just stared at it. She shifted in her seat and felt the smokes rustle in her pocket.

She pulled one out of the box and lit it with her father’s lighter as she set the postcard down, rifling through the box and reading one of the old letters. She drained the smoke by the time the letter was done. It helped, so she started a new one, reaching in and grabbing another page.

This one came up, a faded crayon doodle, Vi as a poorly scribbled knight with a stick figure Powder behind her.

She made it through half the pack by the time she put the doodle away. She set it back in the box gently, and then reached for the postcard to add it to her dragon's horde. She paused for a moment, and leaned forward, sniffing at the paper. She was right, Powder had added some perfume or something to the card like she had the last time she sent her mail.

It was a pretty scent. Apples and cinnamon. Vi finished one more smoke before going back inside.

3 months later, Grayson would be hit by a drunk driver while coming back from grocery shopping, and Vi and Milo both ended up back in the system.

It took Vi 5 minutes to pack everything she owned. Milo was nice enough to let her keep the iPod.

Vi ended up in Idaho, and then a couple years later in Colorado, maybe an hour drive from Denver with a woman named Xemina Talis and her son. They owned a junkyard, and Vi found herself with lots of free time, and lots of busted up cars to fiddle with to fill it.

Vi is torn from her trip down memory lane by a cough tearing its way up her throat. She pulls a blue hankerchief from her back pocket and retches into it as she feels her lungs spasm trying to clear a path. When she pulls the bandana away, she doesn't bother to look at it.

She feels sleep finally tugging at her eyes, looking at the clock to see 4:32 AM in bright red LED, and lays down onto her side on the cot, reaching her hand out to clasp Powder’s. “How could you ever believe I'd forget you?” She mumbles as sleep finally overtakes her.

Powder doesn't respond, the bloody hankerchief is left hanging off the side of Vi's cot.

Chapter Text

“She’ll be having the scan done later today, should be around 5, perhaps 6 o'clock. It's late, but it's the soonest I could get. May run late if things lag behind. Results should be in my in-basket tomorrow morning. From there, we will have more details to plan around.” Caitlyn explains, writing the appointment on the small whiteboard by the bathroom door.

“Sounds good. Thank you, Cait.” Vi says, worrying the palm of her hand with her thumb. “I'll let Jayce know. He’s planning to come visit, don't want too many people here, it'd make moving her a bitch and all that. Ekko will be stopping by tomorrow too.”

“God, I haven't talked to Ekko since college.” Caitlyn says absentmindedly. She pauses for a moment and chuckles. “I'm glad to see you two made up.”

Vi sighs. “Me too. The man has the patience of a saint, I couldn't imagine my life without him. I ever tell you how me and him reconnected after I got shipped into the system?” Caitlyn shakes her head. “Complete random chance. It was back when I lived with Jayce...”

Jayce walked into the kitchen in a worn out pair of pajama pants and a sweatshirt from their old highschool. A week after graduating, he had debated about cutting the sleeves off and trying to make Sleeveless Hoodies a thing again. Even after 3 years, Vi still gave him shit for it.

Just like Ximena, he went from the entryway to the coffee pot, to his designated spot on the far end of the dining table. Ximena would always take the seat on the other end of the table, to Vi's left, and the seat across from Vi would always remain empty. They were a family of patterns, and the gap left by Jayce's dad left its mark in Ximena and Jayce's routine. Vi swore she could see their footpaths worn into the hardwood like footpaths in a nature trail. The home was nice but it's age showed in the creeks and the old wood grain covering just about every inch.

Jayce tossed a stack of envelopes on the table in front of Vi. She set her spoon down in her bowl of cereal. “Your chunk of bills for the month. Mom says don't worry about rent since you fixed the radiator.” Jayce took a seat with his bagel and coffee.

“Anything else in the mail for me?” Vi asked, like she did every morning. Jayce shook his head no.
“Tell your mom she's getting rent whether she likes it or not.” Vi said through a mouthful of bagged cereal from her corner of the pantry. Jayce shook his head and laughed.

“Dude, come on, you know my mom doesn't actually care if you pay rent. That shit was your idea to begin with.”

“She's not getting money from the state anymore, and she's letting me live here. I'm carrying my own weight.”

“Fine man, go nuts, just make sure the power bill gets paid too. That's the only one that effects me.”

“Yeah yeah, will do. I'll pay it off before I leave for my date.”

“Damn, a date, huh?” Jayce smiled and nudged her with his elbow. “Thank God, at this point I was wondering if you were some kind of monk on a vow of celibacy.” Vi rolled her eyes and punched him in the arm.

“Nah, that's just wishful thinking so you don't gotta worry about competition. There's not exactly a lot of women that are my type out here. That's all.”

“Oh you're just a picky asshole. You had girls falling all over you back in highschool, you just never took the bait.”

“Women are not bait, Jayce. We've talked about-” “That's not what I meant and you know it. I'm not being some chauvinist pig. You just need to expand your horizons.”

“Well, clearly I am. I'm going out with that girl Periwinkle, you remember her? Asked me to fix her 4 wheel drive last week?”

“Oh, the artsy one with the tattoos and the blue ponytail?”

“Yeah. She wants to drive into the city and check out the Christmas lights at the botanical gardens.”

“You and your blueberries, man.”

“What was that?” Vi asked with a quirked brow.

Jayce took a bite of his bagel and replied “ I’m just saying there’s a pattern."

"Bullshit."

"There is! Your dating history is like a fucked up casting call for Blue is the Warmest Color.”

“I never should have shown you that fucking movie. Besides, your full of it. Lest had black hair.”

“She dyed it black months after you guys started dating, when you first started going out it was blue. You also broke up like a week later.”

“Dude, that's a low fucking blow, she’s dumped me.” Vi said pointedly. Jayce raised his hands in surrender. “I'm grabbing smokes on the way out, you want me to bring you anything back?”

“Nah, I'm trying to quit. Shit’s bad for your health.”

“Yeah, so is living.” Vi replied, pouring the last of her cereal milk into her mouth. She wiped her mouth off on her sleeve before cleaning her bowl, putting it in the dishwasher and leaving to pay the power bill. Before she left the room, she paused at the doorway and looked back to Jayce. “Still on for boxing tomorrow?”

“Yup. Bright and squirrely before I go into town for class. Just make sure to turn the heater on in your shop beforehand.” Shop was a charitable descriptor for the old work shed Vi had unofficially taken over for her tinkering.

“Will do.” She said as she left the room. She had a few hours until she needed to start getting ready, so she went out into the lot to see if she could find a new serpentine belt for her truck.

She arrived to her date 15 minutes late.

“Hey, Peri, I'm so sorry.” Vi said as she walked up to the woman.

“It's totally okay, I saw your text.” Peri said, standing from her seat on the bench to greet Vi with a hug. She was a pretty femme, with a sweater dress and a pair of high knit socks that disappeared under it. She had giant puffy earmuffs that clamped her curly blue locks into a bell shape around her head. “How was the drive down?”

“Great. With the new belt I can actually run the headlights and the heater without it screeching. So I still have some sensation in my hands.” Peri laughed and Vi felt some reassurance she hadn’t atom bombed her chances by being late. It was a cute laugh, the kind where her eyes scrunched and Vi could see color creep into her cheeks.

“Well, maybe a hot chocolate will do some good for you then. There's a really good shop a couple blocks from here. Way better than the stands in the gardens. They think the pretty holiday lights will make everyone forget they're paying 10 bucks for powdered box mix.”

“Sounds great to me.” Vi said, pulling her coat tighter around her. It was the least grease stained of all her warm clothes, with a (mostly) pristine blue plaid pattern laid in the wool. VI was jealous of Peri’s socks, because for God's sake work pants were not made for snow, and Vi would die before willingly wearing thermals. “Mind if I smoke?” Peri shook her head no and Vi lit up, catching the way Peri’s eyes drifted down to her lips. She gave a smile. “So, last night you were telling me about a new project?”

“Yeah! Oh my gosh, it feels silly to call it new. I've been working on this painting the last few months,” she pulled out her phone, showing Vi various photos of the painting as they walked down the snowy sidewalks. “I wanted to play with color more in this one than the last big project I had. It was a lot more like, Keith Haring-esc, and this time I really wanted to lean into something different. I just feel like I've been in a rut lately.”

“Oh wait” Vi swiped back a photo. “I love the texture you put on that one there. Was that intentional?”

“Not in the slightest, but I really loved how it turned out once it was done.” Vi couldn't help but laugh.

“Well hey, at least you're honest.” Vi offered.

“Oh I'm quite a lot of things.” Peri taunted.

“Oh is that so?”

“You'll just have to see, I guess.” Peri kept walking, nudging Vi with her elbow, inching closer to her and staying there after. Vi nestled up closer as well, and felt Peri link their arms.

“So, what kind of things do you do for fun?”

“Well, cars of course. Though I'll admit that's a fucking awful hobby to have during the winter. Hurts a hell of a lot more to fuck with nuts and bolts when jack frost is around.” That managed to pull another laugh from Peri. “But I try to read when I can. Keep cultured and all that shit.”

“Oooh, reading anything good?”

“You ever read anything by Leslie Feinberg? Stone Butch Blues?” Vi asked.

“No, which makes me feel like an awful femme.” Peri admitted, a joking look of shame on her face. “It's on my to-read list though, I swear.” Vi laughed at that.

“You can borrow my copy if you want, I’m just rereading it.” Vi offered as they stepped into the crosswalk, Peri leading them along the way.

“I would love that. Okay, but have you read any Bechdal?”

“Not really. Family is a complicated enough subject for me as is. I saw her latest one was “are you my mother” and knew damn quick I wasn’t ready for that.”

“Valid. Valid. I think you might like her comics though. I'll lend you one of my copies.”

“”One of”?”

“I might have a bit of an obsession.” Vi cackled and put her smoke out on her boot, a habit she'd picked up from Lest years prior, before they walked into the shop. A few minutes later they walked out with a fresh hot cocoa and one apple cider. Vi produced a pair of tiny bottles from her coat pocket. “Care for a lil extra warmth.”

“Oh my God, yes please.” Peri popped the top off her cup and Vi poured a shot of cinnamon whiskey into the cocoa, doing the same with her own cider. “Mmm, it's perfect.”

“I thought they might help.” Vi chuckled and sipped her apple cider, the whiskey getting lost in the flavors of apple and cinnamon.

“So what's the story with your obsession with Bechdel?” Vi proded.

“Listen, I can't help it. I grew up a dyke with a perfectionist mother and a weird relationship with my dad. I was basically “Assigned Allison Bechdel Stan at Birth”.”

Vi felt bad laughing at that one. Maybe that was how Jayce felt about her foster care jokes. “That'd be a long ass acronym.”

“God you're so fucking corny.” It was affectionate.

“So what else do you read?”

“Do you count smut?” Peri asked as they entered the gardens, the whole thing covered in lights for the holidays.

“Duh.” Vi said, before pointing at a pretty tree, covered in red, blue and green swirling lights. “Oooh I love that one.”

“It's so pretty. Okay, I just finished “A Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics.”, very good read. It's a Victorian era romance with an older, wealthy widow and this spunky young lady scientist she ends up funding. I was shocked to find an examination of class, sexuality, race and gender in 1800s England nestled in a paperback romance video. Very very good. Very smutty. The smut is also very good.”

“Okay now that I wanna read. Shit sounds insane."

“I know, right? Like I understand all the lil old ladies with their shitty dime store romances so much more now. When it's made gay it fucking slaps.”

“Probably the most action those ladies saw in months.” Vi joked.

“Well I'm hoping I'll have a little bit more luck with that.” Peri said with a sly wink. Vi felt her cheeks get warmer and prayed she'd get away with blaming it on the cold.

“I mean, I feel like you'll have plenty of luck.” Peri gave her a smile and Vi sipped her cider. “I mean, if you wanted to, we could slip back to my place?"

"Mmmm, I mean, that sounds-"

“Holy shit, Vi?!” A familiar voice called out from behind her. Vi whipped around, having to let Peri’s arm go for a moment to turn around and see a head of white locks and a green coat running at her. Ekko had her tackled in a hug before Vi could say a word.

“Dude! Holy shit, what are the chances!?” Ekko said, pulling back from his hug. He stood just at Vi's height, even being several years younger.

“Oh my God, little man!” Vi gripped him by the shoulders, absolutely beaming from ear to ear. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I just got off from work! Helped put all these lights up."

"Dude that sounds awful."

"Mel, the pay was good, and I need the money. I'm saving up to pay for trade school.” Vi felt her grin grow even wider, and genuinely wondered if she might split a lip from smiling.

“That's amazing! Congratulations, man. You've got a whole plan and everything.” Vi said. She realized she was being rude and turned to Peri. “This is Ekko, him and me were inseparable as kids. Dude was like the little brother I never had.” Ekko looked confused as Vi turned to him and spoke. “Ekko, this is-”

“C'mon man, my memory isn't that bad. I recognize Powder!” Ekko turned to a very confused Periwinkle, wrapping her in a hug as well, before pulling back and smiling at them both. “Holy shit, it's insane to see you both after so long.”

Vi swallowed hard as Peri gave her a deeply confused and uneasy expression.

“No-no, Ekko, this is Periwinkle, we’re uh… out here on a date.” Vi explained. Echo’s cheeks got dark and his eyes went wide.

“Oh shit, uh, sorry to interrupt, and you know, the hug. I can give you my number Vi, and you can just hit me up-” “No, you know, actually-” Peri interrupted. “You two really deserve to be able to catch up. I actually have to go, I got a text from my roommate, the landlord is pissed.”

Peri hadn’t touched her phone since they left the cocoa shop. She backed away and told Vi she would text her later, which would turn out to be a lie. Vi offered to walk Peri to her car, but that was politely yet swiftly No-thank-You’d.

Vi sighed and pulled her smokes from inside her jacket, lighting up with her father’s old lighter.

“Well.. shit.” Ekko said. “Sorry about that, man.”

“Nah, that's… y'know, she was giving me weird vibes all night. I probably didn't really have a shot anyway. You just gave her a good out.” Vi lied through her teeth. “It happens. Dykes are weird like that.” Vi took a drag and quickly added. “Oh shit, I'm a lesbian by the way I'm not just-””no yeah I pretty much figured. You look the part.” Ekko quickly responded.

Vi sighed and shook her head.

Then they both started cackling laughing.

“Oh God man, I missed you so fucking much.” Vi said, hugging Ekko from the side.

“I thought I was never gonna see any of you again. I can't believe I lucked out and recognized that hair.” Vi felt him clap her on the back. “Well, I guess if your schedule has opened up, wanna hang out?”

“Fuck it, why not? I live about half an hour from here if I speed. Wanna go get shitfaced and dick around in my workshop?”

“Let's do it. You good driving? I haven't got a car. Took the bus to get here.”

“The bus? Dude, fuck that. You ever need to get somewhere, call me. I'll drive your happy ass wherever you need.”

“Seriously?”

“As a heart attack.”

“I don't know if that's how the saying is supposed to go.”

“What the fuck ever, wanna get drunk or not?”

“Sure man. Gimme just a second, I gotta grab my tools first. I left em over by some rust bucket piece of shit in the corner of the lot.” Vi sighed and Ekko looked at her confused, before seeming to realize “oh God that's your-””-thats my rust bucket piece of shit yes. It drives well and doesn't have a car payment, so shut up.”

They walked into Vi's shop maybe 20 minutes later.

It was a shed with a simple concrete floor, covered in a half dozen rugs on the far side, while the side closest to the door had a massive work bench pushed against a wall, opposite of which had a service door for driving vehicles in and out. Vi pulled up a couple chairs in front of the workbench, walked over to a small space heater, flipping it on max before grabbing a couple hard apple ciders from an old as hell fridge plugged in in the corner. Ximena didn't allow alcohol on the property after Jayce's dad, so Vi had to keep her stash out of the house.

“You just move in here?” Ekko asked, pointing to the bags by Vi's bed. A massive duffle, and two backpacks neatly packed and set along the side.

“No, the family that owns this yard fostered me the last few years I was in the system, and when I graduated the mom was nice enough to offer me cheap rent. I help around the house, help cover bills, shit like that. I make a decent living, taking care of the cars around here. Nothing official though.” Ekko whistled to himself and sipped his cider.

“Good for you man… sorry again about fucking up your date. I feel like a total dick.”

Vi sighs and shrugs.

“Shit happens, I can't blame you for assuming. The hair ain't that common.”

Ekko smiled and held his bottle toward Vi. Vi clinks it with her own, before smacking the top of it with the bottom of hers, sending suds shooting out the top. Ekko hopped up to keep anything from dripping onto him, and Vi just cackles.

“There, were even.”

“Hey man, it's your floors.”

“Shit, right… meh, fuck it. ” Vi takes a long pull from her bottle.

“If you don't mind me asking tho, where is Powder? Up in the main house or something? I'm kinda shocked you two ain’t with Silco and Vander.”

“I keep in touch with them, but I’ve just… you know been busy. Too busy to move in with em.” Vi lied again. “Powder doesn't live here. She lives in this fancy ass McMansion shithole in upstate New York. Got adopted by some family out there when we were just kids.”

“Oh my God, Vi, when was the last time you talked?”

“She uh... She was able to get ahold of me for a few hours when I turned 19. Told me everything she could about her home, school, her family. She said she was trying to write a novel, got really into painting and art and shit so she showed me some of her work.” Vi said, and seeing that look of pity in his eyes burned so much deeper than any look Ximena or Jayce could give her.

“I'm so sorry man.” Vi pulled her smokes out and lit one.

“Shit happens, Ek. I’m just… I don't know, trying to start fresh.” Vi lied again, breathing out the dark clouds from her first long drag.

“Yeah, I suppose.” Ekko looked at his cider bottle and offered it to her again. “To new beginnings, and old friends.”

Vi smiled at him. He always did try to help. She clinked her bottle with his again, and they both drink. Vi sets her bottle back down on the workbench and Ekko immediately taps the bottom of his bottle on the top of hers.

“You son of a-” Vi chugged as best she could, but eventually the suds caught up and she ended up with beer all down her shirt. Ekko looked around and found an old iPod touch on the edge of the workbench, hooked to a ratty old speaker system. He walked over, music on the mind, and Vi sighed.

“Shit’s broken as hell.”

“Probably cus you're running it off a piece of tech that I am pretty sure went out of service a decade ago.” Ekko said, but to his surprise the iPod lit right up, plugged into the same outlet as the speakers.

“Nope. The speakers just don't work unless the wires are at, like, the perfect angle. Shit's more trouble than it's worth. I just haven't tossed it out.”

“Well, let me fiddle with it.” Vi shrugged.

“Be my guest. Didn't know you were into tech.”

“Of course I am, man. Gotta be, to be a half decent electrician.” Ekko said, pulling a multi tool from his jacket pocket, he discarded the jacket as the room warmed up.

“Huh, so that's your trade of choice?”

“Yup. I love the way wiring things up works. It's like your own little Frankenstein's monster, you have to plan every vein and artery, then it's alive.” Ekko said, raising both hands in the air and putting on a fake German accent for the last few words. Vi couldn't help but laugh.

“Okay, Doctor Frankenfurter, I think you've had too much to drink.”

“I've had literally one hard cider. Not even, half of it ended up on your floor, jerk.” Ekko said, popping open the back of the sound system with his screwdriver.

“Okay then I guess you're just not funny.” A single discarded bolt from Vi's workbench hit her in the head, and she couldn’t help but laugh.

An hour and a half and several apple flavored bottles of alcohol later, they were badly dancing to some poorly shuffled playlist off Ekko’s phone.

“Vi, dude, what the fuck are-” Jayce walked in right as Vi tried and failed to moonwalk, landing square on her ass. He looked over and seemed shocked to see Ekko. “Do uh, y'all need some privacy?”

“Jayce, what the fuck are you doing up?”

“Dude, it's only like 9 pm.” Jayce said, leaning a little more in. “Hey, just be sure to clean up your bottles and shit. You know how my mom gets about booze.”

“Don't worry man, they'll be in a bag on the way to recycling at dawn.” Vi slurred out with a salute.

“So, just to be sure, this isn't some weird sex thing?”

Vi and Ekko scrunched their noses in unison. “Ew, fuck no.” They said at the same time, looking at each other and then cackling like drunk idiots.

“Hey, I mean, I told you to expand your horizons. I didn't think that would include trying dudes, but you do you.” Jayce taunted. Two things were thrown at him in rapid succession. Vi chucked a bolt at his head, which missed by a mile and change, and Ekko tossed him a cider. He looked at the bottle hesitantly, but shrugged and popped the top off against the edge of the workbench, opting to join them.

“Dude, that's gross, this man is like a brother to me.” Vi said, clapping Ekko on the back.

“Hey, whatever boats your float.” Vi chucked another bolt, managing to hit his shoe. She took a long puff from her smoke.

“You're such a fucking asshole.” Vi said with a cackle.

“The three of us were really inseparable after that. I think I spent more time with the two of them than just about anyone in my whole damn life up to that point. Besides Powder, of course.” Vi's smile turns a little somber, and Caitlyn can tell she's thinking about college. “Even after everything I put Ekko through… he still never gave up on me.” Caitlyn smiles at her, she hopes she's reassuring, but feels like it doesn't quite meet the cut. “Guess I can say the same about you now, though. I really do appreciate everything you've done to help us. I know we didn't part on the uh… best terms.”

Caitlyn sighs and moves away from the computer, her charting completed. “It's nothing, Vi. I'm taking care of her like I would any other patient. However…” Vi tensed at that. “I can understand if you feel… uncomfortable with me being her physician. If you'd prefer to avoid a potential conflict of interest, I can have her assigned to-””-no.” Vi cuts in, simple, calm, but without an inch to wiggle. “I wouldn't trust anyone else in this building with her life like I trust you. Pow adored you, she really did. I know she'd rather you be the one taking care of her.”

Caitlyn nods, and feels some strange mix if guilt, anger, and pride in that.

“I'll be back in a few hours when doing my rounds. I'll have a few students with me, if that's okay?"

“Yeah, just don't let them treat her like some kind of guinea pig.”

“Never.” Caitlyn assures. Vi smiles, and Caitlyn notices the heavy bags under her eyes.

"Cait, you uh, you left your computer logged in." Vi points out.

"Oh Lord, thank you. I do that all the time."

Caitlyn is in the cafeteria later that morning, getting what could charitably be called either a reasonable lunch or a very late breakfast (considering she had no food up to this point, it would count as the latter). She just finishes paying for her food when she hears “Caitlyn Kirraman, well aren't you a sight for sore eyes.”

Jayce saddles up to her with a grin that she hasn't seen in years, outside of her television. She sets her tray down and wraps him in a hug.

“Could say the same for yourself, Senator.” Jayce hugs back.

“Oh please, I'm not elected just yet.” Caitlyn laughs and sees Jayce has a tray of his own, two in fact.

“Care to eat together?” Jayce asks, pointing to the nearly empty seating area. “I just got done visiting Vi and Powder, was gonna eat, drop some food with Vi, and then leave.”

“I think I can make that time.” Caitlyn teases.

“How have you been?” Jayce asks, leading them to a far corner of the room, several tables away from the nearest person. It should be a while before the room gets busy again.

“Overworked, underpaid, and my daughter has been an absolute hellion.”

“So the usual?” Jayce asks.

“Yes, the usual.” She sighs and fiddles with her fingers. “I… I wanted to say I'm sorry. For missing Viktor’s funeral.” Jayce sighs this time.

“I understand why you couldn't.” He shrugs.

“How's your mother been? How's Mel?”

“Mel is good. Still on the Newark city council, she enjoys it here in the city. Mom… mom’s good. Still pressing me about grandkids, but you know, I think she's starting to finally realize that's not happening.” Cait chuckles. “It's getting close to my dad's anniversary though, so she's gonna fly out next week to see us. It'll be nice, she can meet Isha. Maybe that'll get her off my back about grandkids. Though I wish it was under better circumstances.” Cait rests her hand on his. “I'm fine, Cait. It's been a long time.”

“Jayce, your father-”

“Drank himself to death. I've come to terms with it. I'm 54, I don't need to be coddled about it.” He assures, shaking his head, changing the subject. “Vi said you're Powder’s doc. That true?”

“It is.”

“That must be fuckin awkward.” she hasn't heard that kind of language from him since university.

“They're just another patient and their family.” She declares so certainly. “She's been telling me some stories about her youth. How did I never know you lived together for nearly 6 years?” Caitlyn asks incredulously to shift the conversation. "I spent nearly my entire premed uni career with the two of you and I never heard a word about this.” Jayce laughs at Caitlyn’s question, a french fry in hand.

“Well to be fair, Vi barely talks about anything from her past unless she's drunk, and she's been sober for damn near 25 years. But also it uh… was pretty painful toward the end, so I think she may just try to kind of block it out.” Jayce admits. Caitlyn feels her brow furrow in confusion, and Jayce just sighs, leaning back in his chair, giving a quick look around, like he's scanning the room for threats. “Well, uh, okay so I’d known Ekko for like, a little less than a year when this all went down...”

Jayce and Ekko were on a run to the gas station, Vi's wallet in hand. Ekko had his overalls and green winter jacket on, Jayce was in a coat so puffy it made him look like a marshmallow man. Ekko had a couple of cases of cheap cider under his arms, the kind they liked to keep stocked in Vi's fridge. Well, Vi and Ekko did. Aside from the occasional cider, Jayce basically never drank. He didn't shit on Ekko or Vi for it though.

As they walked up to the counter Jayce pointed behind the clerk. “Two cartons of the menthols please. The blue ones.”

“Two cartons? Weren't you boys in here just last week getting two more?” The old lady behind the counter asked, sliding the boxes over as Ekko slid Vi's debit card.

“No, it was more like two weeks ago, I could swear.” Jayce said, and the old lady shrugged, rang them up, and sent them on their way.

“She's right though.” Ekko said as they loaded into Jayce’s pickup. His was in a significantly better condition than Vi's, seeing as he'd bought it, not built it. “We were there last week snagging her more smokes.”

“I know, I just thought maybe best to not seem insane. I've gotten used to her getting like this. Basically every year I've known her, between October and her birthday she smokes like a chimney. More than usual, I mean.” Jayce said with a shake of his head. “I remember last year, the second week of October, I shit you not I saw her smoke an entire pack in one half hour bitch-session out on the patio.”

Ekko chewed his cheek. “Fuck.” He said, putting something together in his head.

They pulled the truck back into the scrap yard and hopped out to the sounds of blaring music in the shop, Vi tearing into something under the hood of her newest pet project, a suitable ride for Ekko. It was a 2006 Subaru Outback that had been sent to the scrap for a cracked engine block.

“Here's your wallet and your smokes, try to make these ones last.”Jayce said, tossing them both onto the duffel bag set neatly alongside Vi's bed.

“Thanks, man.” Vi popped open the carton and grabbed a pack, stuffing it in her grease stained back pocket. Her hair was so full of grease and oil it was slicked back out of her eyes despite its length. Vi lit a smoke and slapped the side of the car. “I think she's ready for the new engine. Think you guys can help me drop her in, then we can get smashed to celebrate?”

“Something feels very wrong about drinking to celebrate a new car.” Ekko said, but he grinned from ear to ear and continued. “As long as you're cool with me crashing on your bed again I'm down.”

“Course, man.” Vi finished the smoke and tossed it in the direction of her ashtray, which at this point was trying its best to contain what Ekko had dubbed the Mount Everest of cigarette butts.

The new engine hung from the mount in the ceiling by a massive length of chain and a winch. “This is the biggest engine they ever put in these things. 6 cylinders, 3 liters. Obviously it's nothing fancy but it'll get you 250 horsepower.” Vi explained as they guided the engine down, Jayce slowly lowering it with the winch.

“Keep going, keep going, keep going, STOP!” Vi shouts, Jayce quits turning the winch, and Vi and Ekko hurry to start connecting the bolts, supports, belts, wires, and such.

Several hours, a few hundred swear words, and some sore cold fingers later, the work is done. The engine turns over with a roar, and the three of them were so excited they almost forgot to open the damn service door, leaving the exhaust nowhere to go.

After opening the doors and catching their breath, the three of them cracked open some drinks and sat on the concrete ramp leading out of Vi’s workshop, leaving Vi's room to air out and hopefully rid itself of the scent of car exhaust. It was not successful, but Ekko and Vi slept like logs on that smelly bed anyway.

The next morning, Vi walked into the kitchen with Ekko in tow, and Jayce greeted them as he always did. “Good morning, lovebirds.”

“I'm a dyke.” Vi muttered under her breath.

“And you're a dick.” Ekko followed up, smacking Jayce on the side of the head. He just chuckled and ate his bagel.

“We doing anything today?” Jayce asked.

“Nope. I got the day off.” Ekko said.

“For once.” Vi joked, pouring herself a bowl of bagged cereal and sliding the bag over to Ekko.

“Living ain't cheap.” Ekko responded, pouring himself a bowl and sitting across from Vi, the only spot left open at the small dining table being Ximena’s.

“Your mom has a few tasks for me. Checking out the heater, making sure the oil tanks are topped off, basics. Maybe we can drive into town and snag a late lunch after. Oh shit, plus Erika is coming up to get her car looked at again.”

“Isn't that like, the third time this month?” Ekko said.

“Yeah, she's a hypochondriac.” Vi says with a shrug. Jayce just laughs.

“More like a Vi-pocondriac. She just stares at you the whole time she's over.”

“I’m the mechanic she's paying to fix her car. Nothing wrong with her wanting to be sure I'm doing a good job.” Vi excused, downing a concerningly large bite of cereal.

“Oh whatever, she's totally into you.” Jayce said.

“Whatever, dude. She's not my type.”

“You're just saying that cus she's a brunette. If she was-””-Jayce, start on this bullshit again and you can do your own damn belt change next time that yuppy piece of shit pops.” Vi cut in. Jayce and Ekko exchanged a look, and Vi sighed to herself and took another bite of cereal.

“Fine, alright, I'll drop it.”

Vi chews her cereal, and a whole minute later, she lets out a quiet “thanks, man… sorry.”

“It's all good. Just… I know you've been in a funk the last few weeks.”

“Come on man, I don’t need the therapy brigade.” Vi groaned.

“It'll be the tenth next week.” Ekko said, looking Vi dead in the eyes.

“I know.” Vi pinched the bridge of her nose.

“What am I missing here?” Jayce asked.

“Powder’s birthday.” Jayce’s eyes went wide as he looked back to Vi.

“Holy shit, dude why didn't you tell me? How old is she now?”

“She'll be 18, right? She's only about a year and a half younger than I am.” Ekko said plainly. Vi stood, her bowl half eaten, and started washing it in the sink.

“Whatever man, can we please not talk about this?” Vi all but begged over her shoulder.

“Dude, you keep bottling shit up it's gonna fuckin kill you.” Ekko said pointedly. Vi put her dishes in the washer and grabbed the smokes from her back pocket.

“Will it be quick? If so, I think I'd take that over this conversation.” Vi said, popping a cigarette in her mouth and walking for the door.

“Vi, don't joke about that. We've lost enough.” Vi paused at the door frame and sighed.

“Sorry, Ek, okay. I'm just… I’m not gonna be okay for a while. It just happens. Time’ll pass, I’ll be back up to myself after my birthday. Can we please drop it? There's nothing I can do, and I don't like thinking about that.”

Ekko sighed and exchanged a look with Jayce, before looking back at Vi. “Okay man, I'm sorry. Do you need anything?”

“Swing by later tonight? We can take that new beauty of yours out for a real test drive?”

“Of course. Sounds good. Text me when you're done and I'll drive back up.” Vi nodded and walked outside. Jayce could hear her lighter flick a half second after the door closed.

“Man, what are we gonna do?” Ekko asked, mindlessly stirring his cereal.

“I don't know. The best we can, I guess.” Jayce took another sip of his coffee. “What are you gonna do now that you have a real ride?”

“I was uh… thinking about finally biting the bullet and applying to a trade school.” Jayce beamed.

“Hey man, good for you. You planning to stay local?” Ekko shrugged.

“Not sure yet.” He admitted sheepishly. “I’d feel bad leaving here. Leaving you and Vi.”

Jayce grimaces a little bit. “I uh, got a little news on that too. I didn't want to say anything because of the timing and all, but I uh… I got accepted to this really good school in Michigan, in this little town called Thebes. Mom is doing better financially, and I'm kinda out of credits I can use at the community college.” Jayce shrugs. “I uh, I think they have a trade school in the area too.” He offered. “We can try and talk Vi into going with us. Maybe that's what she needs, a change of scenery.”

Ekko wondered for a moment, but something told him as much as Vi refused to let her roots take hold, she wouldn't like the idea of leaving either. “She's been here 6 years man. This place is the closest thing she has to a home.”

“Home isn't a place, it's people. I think she'll go for it if we try talking to her. If not, well then she stays here and mom has some more help around the house. It's her decision what she does with her life. I think she'll like having that choice for once.” He offered with a shrug. Things seemed so simple back then.

“Yeah, maybe-” a ringing came from the floor across from Ekko. He looked under the table to see Vi's phone buzzing quietly on the floor. “Dude, she forgot her fuckin phone again.” He said, moving over and grabbing it up, answering a second before it could click to voicemail. “Yello.”

“Oh, my apologies, I might have the wrong number. I was trying to get ahold of Violet. Violet Dollanganger?” A woman's voice replied somberly from the other side.

“Yeah, this is her line. Sorry, she forgot her phone in the kitchen. I can try and snag her. Is this Erika?”

“Who the hell is Erika?” The voice replied, quickly trying to do some damage control with “Sorry, I mean no, it's not. My name's Powder. I-” Ekko almost dropped the phone.

“Powder!? Holy shit, it's me! It's Ekko, from the old neighborhood?” He said hurriedly, looking to a flabbergasted Jayce, hearing her gasp on the other side.

“Oh my god! Ekko, that's amazing! How long have you been with Vi?”

“Oh well like, we're not together, she's-””-Yeah no shit, you know what I mean!””-Sorry, I know, I know. Here, let me get you to her. She's been missing you something fierce. This'll get her out of her grouchy ass mood.”

“... She's missed me?” Powder said quietly from the other side of the line.

“Of course she did, dumbass.” Ekko teased, and he heard a giggle on the other side of the line. Ekko threw the door open and saw Vi on the far end of the lot, just at the edge of earshot. He set the phone down, cupped his hands, and shouted out after her. “VI! VI! VI YOU DIPSHIT TURN AROUND!”

The first yell slowed her pace, the second halted her, the third got her facing Ekko finally. Ekko held up the phone and Vi waved it off, shifting to turn back around. “ITS POWDER!” that stopped her dead in her tracks, facing him as he heard her yell back “what” just barely loud enough to hear. Ekko cupped his hands and shouted as loud as he could. “POWDER!”

Vi sprinted back to the front door. She closed the gap in a minute and was a panting mess, barely able to catch her breath. “I swear.. to God… if this is a fucking joke…”

Ekko stuffed the phone in her hands, sending Vi's cigarette falling unnoticed on the porch. “Talk to her yourself!”

“That you, Clouds?” Vi asked, pressing the phone to her ear.

Vi sits at Powder’s bedside, scrolling her photos as she sees a hastily scribbled out list of steps, written on her old shop pad from back at Ximena’s place.

“God I can't believe we ever thought this would work.” She says to Powder, silent save for the whirring of her ventilator. What Vi wouldn't give in that moment to have that kind of optimism in her today. Instead she just reads through her own old notes, remembering that day she thought she could really have her family back.

“That you, Clouds?”

“Vi! Oh thank God, it's really you.” Jinx sighed in relief, the sounds tickled the hairs on the back of Vi's neck.

“Of course it's me. Accept no imitations.” Vi joked, trying her best to keep her composure, Ekko still staring at her.

“Never. I just, well sometimes I… that's not important right now. I'm just glad it's you. It took me almost a year to get ahold of Silco and Vander. I'm pretty sure the only reason I could was because my family has been so busy with planning the party, they don't have time to keep an eye on me.”

“Jesus, what are you in some kind of lockdown?” Vi said, pacing back and forth on the porch.

“No, it's just… they're so fucking worried about making sure I don't "sully the family name". It's all a bunch of weird old money bullshit. They've already picked out the college I'm going to, my major, where I'm living, what I'm going to fucking eat, every God damn thing.” She heard Powder groan. “I can't fucking take this place anymore Vi. God, walking on eggshells doesn't even fucking come close. I feel like I'm tapdancing in a minefield. Every God damned day it's something new wrong; I'm too loud, or crass, or clumsy or fucking something!” Vi hadn't heard Powder cry since their last phone call almost 4 years ago. The thought made her queasy and she leaned against the house as she heard a choked sob from the other side of the line.

“God, Powder I’m so sorry.” Vi whispered.

“I need your help.”

“Anything. Please, just ask."

“I can't get out of this place on my own. I need help.”

“Wait, like you're a hostage or something?” Vi saw Ekko bristle in the corner of her vision.

“Not technically. Until my birthday I'm a kid, but all the shit they seem to have planned for my college seems hell bent on keeping me stuck. There’s some private university on a mountain in the middle of but-fuck nowhere Europe. It's like an hour from any kind of population center. I'll be locked away for another 4 God damn years and that's assuming they don't decide I'm going to do a masters. Because fuck me right? Why should I have any say in my God damned life!?”

“Can't you just say no?” Vi couldn't tell what she was missing here.

“And end up back in the psyche ward again? No thanks.”

“The fucking what?!” Vi shouted into the phone.

“Can't be too loud or else we're “having an episode”, can't calmly say no and sit quietly or else it's a “depressive spiral.”” Powder seemed to be more lamenting to herself than actually trying to explain it.

“Jesus, Clouds, does Vander know?”

“He has for years, but with the lawyers my dad can afford it doesn't matter.” Vi groaned and shook her head.

“I can't believe he never fucking told me.”

“Vi, I told him not to. You couldn't do anything.”

“I could've come get you!”

“And caught a fucking kidnapping and abduction charge for taking a minor from her home?” Powder shot back , leaving Vi floundering. Powder hadn't challenged her like that before, and the first time she did, she won. There was another sloshing sound, and Powder continued. “But that changes next week. I'll be a legal adult, and if you can just get me off the property before they notice, I'll be free. They won't be able to pull any of that “oh she's not well mentally, please help us officer, we're so worried for our little fucking psycho bitch daughter” shit on me in time to stop me.”

“How do we do it?”

“They're having a party on the 10th. It'll be insanely packed, lots of traffic in and out, perfect for me to slip through. There's an old service road off the freeway, they make labor use it instead of the nice road their guests take. If you can take it onto the property, it'll give you an easy way in without too many eyes on you. Find me, we slip out when we can, and we're home free. I don't care where the hell we go, I just want to be away from here and back with you, and Vander and Silco and Ekko and… I know this is a lot to ask, but do you think it'll work?”

“We're going to try it, regardless. Hell or high water, I’m getting you away from that place.”

Vi envies the certainty of her younger self.

She heard a sigh of relief from the other end, and then another sob. “God, thank you, Vi. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I… I can't tell you how long I've been waiting for a chance like this.”

“I know, Powpow. God, don't I know.” Vi lamented. “Are you doing okay? Do you have any friends around who can help?”

“Not really. I had a legion of acquaintances back in highschool, but none that lasted past graduation. All the guests for the party are weird business partners of my parents. These snooty rich fucks have no God damned souls, Vi. It's all just empty pomp and circumstance. I'm pretty sure you could crack one open and you'd find servos and gears running off of their own greasy self importance. I can't fucking stand these people.” Vi paused as she heard Powder’s words slurring together.

“Powder, are you drunk?”

“I'm tipsy, that's very different, thank you very much.” She hiccuped into the line. “You would be too if you had to live with these fucking people. I swear being cooped up with them has made me absolutely batty. This call is the first good thing I've had going on in months… Can we keep talking? Please?”

Vi furrowed her brow. “Of course, Pow. How long have you got?”

“Somewhere between an hour and eternity.” She said with a tipsy giggle.

“Seriously, Powder, I don't want to risk you getting caught again.”

“Always protecting me, even when you're God only knows where…” Powder mumbled into the line, giggling at the end.

“I'm still an hour out from Denver. Living in this little auto-graveyard with the same family from last time we talked.”

“You finally set down some roots. Good for you.” Powder’s pride and envy showed. “So, who is Erika?” Vi shot Ekko a glare, and he just looked back confused.

“Erika is just some girl who stops by to have me check out her car.”

Ekko laughed as he put together the context clues. Powder laughed at the same time. It's a syrupy, bubbling laugh that makes Vi smile just hearing it. She hadn't heard that sound in almost a decade, and yet again the thought makes her queezy.

“Oh my God you actually went and became a mechanic? You absolute fucking stereotype.” Powder teased. “Let me guess, big old flannels, you don't own a pair of shoes that aren't work boots, you drive some shitty rust bucket you fixed up cus “they don't make em like they used to”... oh I bet you don't drink anything but cheap vodka and shitty beer.”

“I fucking hate vodka. Fireball and hard cider are more my speed. And I'm not a mechanic, you need certifications for that shit. I just fix stuff up for friends.” Vi chuckled.

“That's worse, you realize thats worse right?! You're like the homophobic propaganda cartoons they play in Mormon temples.” They both laughed and Vi pinched the bridge of her nose. “How many repairs have you done for a case of Angry Orchard?”

“Fuck off! That's a cheap shot and you know it!” Powder cackled on the other line, coming to a quiet pause before she finally spoke up again.

“Never change, Vi. Promise me?” Powder said it so somberly, some fear creeping into the edges of her voice.

“Never.” Vi swore, she put her back against the wall and slid down, dropping onto her ass. “Tell me about your life, Pow. What have you been doing? Are you still painting? What happened to that book idea you were working on?” Powder groaned.

“Oh, God I forgot about that. I gave up on that years ago, turns out a wealth of reading does not in fact prepare you for writing worth a shit. Just turned into self insert fantasies to pass the time. Got me locked up for a week in the ward after they found it. “Maladaptive daydreaming” or some shit.” Powder sighed. “Painting’s been good, though. I love it. My style really feels like it's developing into something I can appreciate.” She giggled again. “I've been thinking about what I want to do when I'm out on my own, finally… I’d make a pretty good tattoo artist, don't you think?” Vi chuckled at that.

“I mean, if you've got the art talent, why not?”

“Exactly!” Powder said, so vindicated by her sister's approval. “Hell of a lot better fit for me than a business major with a minor in fucking healthcare administration.”

“Oh God that sounds fucking disgusting-””-Doesn’t it?! It’d be nice, finally getting to do something that'll leave my mark on the world. Not having to deal with this perfect pristine bullshit.” Powder giggled and continued. “I have this sketchbook I stash under my bed, it's full of all my best designs. Maybe I can tattoo you once we're home free.” The thought of Powder leaving something on her that would last forever made Vi's chest feel tight and her eyes water.

“I… I would love that, Powder.” Vi said, her voice cracking over the mic.

“Don't you dare start crying. If you start then I'll start and it'll be just like my call on your birthday.” Vi laughed, tears still tugging at her eyes. “God Violet, this place feels so fucking cold and empty. I miss you, I miss your warmth. I miss getting to tell you everything and showing you my shittiest art projects and having you humor me that they were worth a shit. I’d give anything to be there with you now.” Vi thought about that aged crayon drawing of her and Powder sitting at the top of her keepsake box.

“Just give me a few days, Powder. Just give me a few days and I'll make it all better.”

“I’ll give you everything if you give me the chance.” Powder murmured, quiet and distant. There was a long sigh on the other side. “I can see them driving out of the woods. I should probably hop off.”

“Okay… Good catch.” Vi replied. “I guess this is goodbye for now.”

“I'll text you the map and a few more details in a few minutes. Dress code, a few ideas for cover stories if someone starts bothering you, that kind of shit.”

“Thank you, Powder.”

“I should be thanking you.”

“You're giving me my little sister back. How could I ask you to thank me too?” Powder paused and sighed, almost sounding disappointed.

“Always my knight in shining armor… I love you, Violet.”

“I love you, too, Clouds.”

“Promise you won't forget me?” Powder’s voice cracked, and Vi couldn't hold back. She felt tears drop down her cheeks, Ekko rested a hand on her shoulder.

“I couldn't if I tried.”

The phone line went dead, and Vi sat there for a minute before she pulled it from her ear.

“Vi, what happened?” Ekko furrowed his brows. Vi sniffled, taking a deep breath, clearing her throat, and looking at him.

“You feel like a road trip?” Vi asked from her spot on the floor. “New York isn't that far of a drive, right?”

Ekko just stared at her for a moment, before offering his hand. She grabbed it, and the two pulled Vi back to her feet. She stormed into the house, hollering “Jayce, meet in my shop, ten minutes!” Before turning to Ekko. “Give me a minute, I need to write some things down.” She ran to her shop, leaving her smokes discarded on the porch behind her.

Jayce sighs to himself, his burger half devoured, not a drop of grease or ketchup on his fancy suit.

“By the time me and Ekko got to her shop, she had already gotten some text from Powder with the details she needed. They had this whole scheme cooked up, where Vi could pick up the right clothes to pass as a server, a map of this old dirt road that led onto the back end of the property, everything.” He takes a drink from his paper cafeteria cup. “She said we'd drive out that next morning, road trip to New York to pick her up, bring her back to Colorado and they'd just… figure it out from there. They were going to sneak Vi in amongst the servers, she'd meander around until she found Powder, and then the two would slip out. God, how did we ever think that would work?” He laments to himself, shaking his head.

“Oh, to be young and stupid again. Right?” Caitlyn offers.

“Amen to that… you know, that night was the closest I had ever seen someone be to death… before seeing Powder today, I suppose.” Jayce swallows. “I thought Vi was going to die in the back of Ekko’s shitty little Subaru. It's where she got that scar on her lip, you know.”

“She told me it was from some foster parent.” Jayce exhales.

“It's not exactly something she'd bring up pleasantly. After it all went down, she never really talked about it again. I think it hurt too much… We managed to make it onto the property, Vi actually managed to sneak into the party pretty easy. I can't believe this worked, so she walked up to this guy…”

Vi walked up the back lot of the property in a service worker's nightmare, black button down, black slacks, and a pair of thrift shop dress shoes. Her fingers twitched in anticipation as she prayed to God her plan would work.

She approached a waiter smoking out behind a tree on the edge of the property. “Hey man, you seen Eric?” She asked.

“Come on dude, I'm on my break.” The smoker lamented, taking a drag off his cigarette. “Besides, I don't even know a guy named Eric. Or you for that matter…”

“I just joined up earlier this week. They gave me shit directions so I got here late and some guy in the parking area told me to find Eric, said he'd be out here.” Vi lied through her teeth. “I'm just trying to get my stuff and get started. Last thing I need is to be fired on my first day.”

“Thank God, I've been telling them we need more staff for months now. I think I know who told you all that. Alex loves fucking with the new guys. Don't worry, you'll want to go in through that door there.” He pointed to an industrial style door on a little shed off of the main house. “It’s got a staircase down into the kitchen. Family doesn't like seeing “the help”. Look for the redhead, she'll get you a fresh tray and send you on your route. Be careful though, man. Security is acting super weird. Jeremy bumped into their loonie-toons ass daughter, got thrown out of the building. Literally.”

“Jesus.” Vi muttered. “Hope he's doing okay.”

“Meh, you won't be saying that after a few weeks. Dude is an asshole.” The smoker said. “And listen, don't tell anyone I'm out here, aight?”

“Just as long as you don't tell anyone I was late.” Vi said. He grinned and offered her a smoke. “No thanks.” She said, stepping out from the tree line toward the kitchen. She opened the door easy enough, following a cartoonishly dark staircase down into an industrial sized kitchen absolutely pulsing with activity. Cooks piling trays high with different little bite sized foods, and servers carrying them out up another staircase opposite from her.

The red head found her first.

“You! Where is your name tag?” She was a foot shorter than Vi, with a massive head or curls that framed her round face well. Her pristine acrylic nail poked Vi in the chest to emphasize her question. Vi swallowed down her anxiety and managed to choke out.

“Sorry, Ma'am. Uh, some guy named Alex told me I was supposed to take it off. I didn't get it but I'm the newbie.” She offered.

“I'm gonna kill that damn boy.” Sasha muttered. “Fine, whatever. Full trays are over there. Grab one and go. Try and stay mobile but don't run from the guests. And for the love of God, leave the blue haired girl alone.”

Vi gave a little mock salute, which got an eye roll in response. She took a tray filled with tiny shrimp, figuring it would be easiest to not accidentally drop.

The staircase up brought her into the house in the middle of a hallway. She followed the noise of a crowd into a frankly insanely large ballroom.

Vi had heard Powder talk about her adoptive family being wealthy, but to Vi that had always meant a home they owned and driving the types of cars you made payments on. Then, she saw the full breadth of it all. She didn't even know Ballrooms were real, yet here she was standing in one. A massive staircase at the far end of it lead up into the rest of the house. At the base of the staircase a massive orchestra was playing something Vi guessed could be called music. A field of tables wrapped around the dance floor like a maw about to bite down on them all. Right in the clutches of its maw was a legion of people dressed to the nines prancing around to the lacking tune.

“Jesus.” Vi couldn't help but whisper under her breath. She saw another server wandering between tables, and took her own meandering route around the various small cliques of people sitting around, drinking, laughing, and stuffing their face. A portly man in a sweater that probably cost more than Vi's yearly smoke budget waved her down, and she offered the tray before moving to the next table.

She had gone through maybe a quarter of the tables before her tray ran out. She grit her teeth and went to fetch another. Last thing she wanted was to spend her night feeding these wealthy fucks and missing the chance to even see her sister. She was at the service door back down to the kitchen when she heard her.

“Vi?”

Vi looked behind her at the entrance to the hall, and was greeted by the first real sight of Powder she’d had in more than a decade.

She stood nearly half a foot shorter than Vi, hair chopped at her chin, bangs hanging over her forehead in a way that made Vi certain they'd been cut with scissors in the bathroom. Her dress didn't fit her right, Vi could see Powder flinch as she tried to move in it, running down the hall to meet her.

“Thank God.” Vi whispered, wrapping Powder in her arms. She held the back of Powder’s head, and felt her fingers in the soft blue curls of her hair. She took a breath and was greeted by the sweet warm scent of apples and cinnamon. She breathed her in and felt Powder shudder in her arms.

“We have to go, now.” Powder’s voice cracked as she spoke, pulling back, wiping tears from the corner of her eye, smearing mascara to the side. Vi looked behind her and saw someone very big and very pissed off walking their way.

“Shit. Come on.” Vi grabbed Powder’s hand and threw open the door to the kitchen, dragging her sister behind her down the steps, screaming out ahead of her, “Move! Fire!” Vi said, shoving a server out of their way.

“I'm sorry!” Powder yelled behind them.

“I'm not!” Vi hollered. They ran through the kitchen, and just started their way up the other side as they heard more footsteps running into the room behind them.

Vi slammed her shoulder into the door and threw it open in front of her. Storm clouds gathered in the distance as she and Powder sprinted for the parking area.

“Vi is lucky Ekko was keeping a good watch.” Jayce declares as he crumples up the wrapper to his burger, tossing it down on his tray. “He saw the two of them running for their lives, half the god damn party chasing after them, and got behind the wheel right away. told me to hop in the back seat, so I did.” He sighs and shakes his head. “Powder got to the car first and was about to try to crawl in the back with me, and Vi comes right behind her, scoops her up, plops them both in the passenger seat, slams the door and just yells “drive drive drive!”. We peel out so fast we're throwing rocks behind us into some very pissed off security personnel and several very pricey cars, and somehow managed to end up getting out of there in one piece… well, almost.”

“What happened?”

“Just a hundred karrot run of bad luck.”

Powder gasped for breath, sat on top of a similarly panting Vi in the passenger seat of the car.

“Jesus fucking Christ, did you broadcast via megaphone that you were making a break for it?!” Jayce called, looking back over his shoulder, thankful that there were no lights behind them. It was getting dark quick, thanks to the storm clouds.

“Shit happened man!” Vi snapped back at him, arms around Powder’s waist as she looked out back over her shoulder.

“Take a left here!” Powder shouted over them.

“Where?” Ekko shouted back from behind the wheel.

“Behind the fucking tree!” Ekko yanked the wheel and sent them flying around a corner, further into the dense woods. “This part of the road is used way less. It'll connect to the main highway further away, keep them off our trail. They won't think to follow us here. I always use the main road when I'm running, they'll start there.”

“I hope you're right.” Ekko said, knuckles pale against the steering wheel.

“Should I crawl into the back?” Powder asked.

“I think that's the least of our problems right now.” Vi replied. Jayce leaned forward and offered his hand over the top of the seat.

“Hello, My name is Jayce by the way.” Powder took the offered hand awkwardly over her shoulder.

“Powder.”

“Lovely to finally meet you.”

“You as well. I heard lots of good things from Vi.” Powder offered. For just a moment, Vi took a deep breath and thought they might have actually won, they might actually make it out.

Then there was a pop from outside, and the car slowed to a crawl.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Ekko shouted as he stopped the car.

“Open the trunk! Ekko be ready to go. The both of you, do not get out of this fucking car! We need to be able to go, ASAP!” Vi hollered, hauling her and Powder out just as the rain began. Jayce saw raindrops on the back windshield as Vi threw everything she had into fixing the flat.

By the time the single set of headlights pulled up behind them, Vi was just starting to get the lugnuts fastened on the new tire.

The woman that got out of the car was older. Her thick black curls were streaked with heavy smears of grey, umbar skin marked with scars across her jaw and neck. She wore the same black jacket and slacks as the rest of the security team, along with a pristine red shirt and the radio on her belt.

“Shit, it's Ambessa!” Powder said, looking up from beside the tire at Vi, now standing between the woman and her sister. Vi rolled the sleeves of her shirt up to her elbows. Retrieving something from her pocket.

“Young Miss Powder, I think we've seen the end of this little tantrum. Don't you? Come with me and I'm sure you're parents will be very forgiving.”

“You guys can't keep me stuck in this shit hole my whole life!” Powder snapped.

“Clouds, focus on the lugnuts.” Vi instructed over her shoulder, eyes never leaving Ambessa. Powder moved like a woman possessed, grasping the wrench and fastening the wheel into place.

“That’s nice, dear. Now really, let's end this little joke.” Ambessa moved to step toward Powder, but Violet stepped forward to meet her, the knife still in her grasp, not yet unfolded. Lightning flashed in the air above them, storm clouds choking the sky of light save for the headlights and taillights of their two cars. The whole road bathed in a pale, eerie red and yellow haze.

“You're not taking her.”

“Oh please, child.” Ambessa sighed, aiming a punch at Violet’s jaw. She missed, but only to the point she hit Vi in the side of her head. It dazed her instead of knocking her out cold.

Vi kept on her feet and slammed her fist into Ambessa’s stomach, pushing the two apart.

“Powder, focus on the wheel!” She shouted over her shoulder, ducking out of the path of another cross before throwing everything she had into tackling Ambessa at the waist. She slammed the two of them into the older woman’s car, taking the chance to slam her fist into the side of Ambessa’s head and score another body shot.

Ambessa took the punches like they were nothing. Everything blurred together so quickly.

Vi missed her shot at Ambessa’s jaw, but landed another solid hook into the side of her ribs. Ambessa got her right back with a fist to the sternum that sent Vi stumbling back and gasping for air.

Vi hurled her knuckles at Ambessa’s head again, missing by a mile. Ambessa threw her weight into a strike to Vi's elbow, missing but landing a solid blow to her wrist. Vi pulled her knee into Ambessa’s stomach, and Ambessa took the chance to smash her skull against Vi’s.

Ambessa slipped in the muddy road, which sent her next punch wide. Vi grabbed for the arm and slammed her fist into the other woman's head. Ambessa managed to land a solid blow to Vi's jaw, but overextended, sending them both to the ground.

Ambessa got to her feet quicker, but by the time Vi was up, she’d flicked the blade open.

“Don't pull a weapon you aren't ready to use, brat.” Ambessa snarled.

“Fuck you.” Vi barked back, taking a swing at the woman without taking the time to think of what she'd risked.

She'd hoped pulling the knife would end the fight then and there, but clearly that wasn't the case. Ambessa swung for her and Vi managed to dodge it before leaping forward, sending her knuckles into Ambessa’s jaw, pulling the knife back, ready to strike. This woman stood between her and her life. What else could she do but fight?

Powder shouted that the tire was done, but Ambessa used the surprise to sucker punch Vi in the temple. Vi went crashing down, her dagger discarded in the mud inches from her hands.

Vi reached for the blade, but Ambessa sent her heavy boot into Vi's face. “Your blows have strength, child, but no technique, no precision, no tact. You're nothing but a mutt gone feral, gnashing it's teeth at the world.”

Vi pushed herself up to her knees again, only for a heavy blow to her temple to send her back down. Another blow landed on her ribs, and another, and another.

Powder screamed, while Ekko and Jayce clamored out of the car to help. They stopped dead in their tracks as Ambessa pulled her jacket aside, flashing the grip of a pistol holstered under her arm.

They'd never had a chance to begin with. It'd all just been her game.

“I tire of this little exercise in mediocrity. Miss Powder is going to come home, willingly. Because if she doesn't, then I'm afraid I'm going to have to keep you all here until the police arrive and haul you away.” Ambessa said with a grin.

“Fuck you!” Ekko shouted.

“You two” Ambessa gestured to Ekko and Jayce, gun still exposed, “will be lucky to get away with just trespassing and destruction of property. Miss Violet, with the frequency with which they have to deal with you, I'm sure a stocking and harassment charge could be added as well. Ah yes, and can't forget carrying a concealed weapon, and felony assault with a deadly weapon as well!” Ambessa smiled at them like an executioner smiles while polishing his axe, sending one last kick into Violet’s head as the woman was making another attempt at pushing herself up, hand reaching for the knife. “But, it would be far less of a headache for me if you three simply disappeared. Plus, I'll admit, this little sparring match was fun. So, Powder, how about you come home, and none of your little friends end up in prison?”

Powder looked at the bloodied mess of Vi's body, smeared with mud and grime, lip split open and her eyes fading in and out of focus. She stepped forward.

Ekko moved to stop her, but Jayce stopped him, eyes fixed on the pistol at Ambessa’s hip.

“Powder, please don't do this.” Ekko begged. “We can figure it out.”

“What's there to figure out? We lost, Ekko.”

“It'll kill her to lose you again!” Ekko begged, straining against Jayce’s arms.

“Look at her and tell me she's better off.” Powder sobbed back. “Get her out of here. Get her to Vander and Silco. Let this be done for her.”

Powder went to step forward, only for a hand to wrap around her ankle. Vi, half conscious and bleeding in the mud, gripped her for dear life, her other hand yet again trying to push her back up.

“P-please.” Vi begged, pitiful and broken on the ground at Powder’s feet.

Powder knelt down to her, cradling her head in her arms. Jayce could see a single eye looking back at him, the white of her eye blood red from a burst blood vessel. The eye shook in terror as it pleaded with him silently, “stop her, don't let her go.” Red tears dropped from the corner of the bloody eye as the rain came down, washing their trails away. Whether it was blood or the red taillights illuminating her, Jayce didn't know.

Vi just stared at him.

“I'm sorry.” Powder whispered, placing a kiss on Vi's forehead, lips lingering on the skin. “I'm so sorry I love you.” Powder sobbed against her brow.

She set Violet down gently, standing and walking to Ambessa’s car. Ambessa watched Ekko strain against Jayce’s grasp, and chuckled.

“You boys were close. We thought we had caught your infiltrator already. Didn't think you would be stupid enough to send her. You might have made it out, just unlucky I suppose. I suppose miss Powder has always been a bit of a jinx.” She taunted, opening the door for Powder before moving to her own door. “If any of you three are seen on this property again, please know you will be shot in full accordance with the law. Remind Miss Violet of that when she is conscious again.”

Ambessa and Powder drove away. Ekko stood there for a minute, still trapped in Jayce’s grasp.

“What the fuck happened?” Ekko choked out.

“I… I dont know.” Jayce whispered, rain dumping down on them as they heard sirens in the distance. “Fuck, we need to get her out of here.”

They heaved Vi up, an arm of hers draped over each of their shoulders.

“You drive.” Ekko said, hauling Vi into the back seat with him. She fought back as best she could, trying to crawl back out of the car.

“We can’t…” her voice strained against her throat, every inch moved seemingly taking mountains of effort. Ekko pulled her back without much strain, and Jayce got in and drove. The sound of sirens followed them. He couldn't see the lights or cars, but the sounds hunted them ruthlessly.

Eventually they got back on the freeway, and the sirens finally went quiet.

“Ekko, please. Powder…” Vi whimpered out.

“I’m so sorry, Vi.” Ekko murmured back, arms wrapped around Vi to keep her from trying to go back. “Vander and Silco will know what to do. They have to.”

Then Jayce just heard them both sobbing quietly. Vi didn't try to get out of the car again, but Ekko still held onto her. Vi grasped what of him she could.

"… but yeah, we left New York as fast as we could. Hopped to Jersey and ended up at Silco and Vander’s.”

“You didn't take her to a hospital?” Caitlyn asks incredulously.

“What the hell were we going to say, Cait? The woman looked like she'd been hit by a fucking train. It would raise questions we couldn't answer. Besides, she didn't have insurance. Last thing that woman needed was a bill.”

“Oh my God… I can't believe she never told me.”

“Can you blame her? I know for a fact that day still haunts her Nightmares. She was saying she dreamt about it last night."

Chapter Text

Silco and Vander had a beat to hell three bedroom home in a neighborhood in a strange corner of New Jersey. Vi was laid up in one guest room, while Ekko crashed in the other, and Jayce took the couch. Vi hadn't been conscious for the first day they were there, and Ekko started to panic.

“She's not waking up, Vander. What if she's seriously fucked up? Like a coma or brain dead or something?” Ekko asked, sitting at the dining room counter. Vander, a heavyset man in his forties who wore his stubble as well as any suit, was cooking breakfast at the stove. Jayce clearly held similar anxieties, twitching in his seat across from Ekko.

“Silco is taking a look. He’ll know what to do.” Vander assured. He wore a sweater that hugged him just a bit too tight, and a smile that couldn't quite cover his own concern. At his hip, a massive shaggy mutt of a dog panted in hopes of a treat. “Down girl, no bacon for you. Heart can't handle it.” Vander muttered, nudging the dog away. There was a whine from the dog before she walked away, sitting herself beside Ekko, staring up at him hopefully.

“Not to be ungrateful, but does he even have medical experience? How does he know if she’s okay?” Jayce interjected.

“Boy, I have seen more men dead and dying than you've seen alive and well.” Silco responded from the bottom of the stairwell, walking past the dining table and settling in beside Vander. The two couldn't contrast more if they tried. Vander had long hair, a ponytail, and muscle like an ox. Silco’s hair was slicked back close to his scalp, and the only thing Jayce saw him in the entirety of that week was black slacks, a dress shirt, and a burgondy waistcoat, even at half past midnight when they'd first pulled up. He was wiry and gaunt, with a burn scar centered around one eye that he claimed came from a cop throwing a road flare in his face during some labor strike “when he was their age”. He grabbed a mug from a cabinet and filled it from a pot of drip coffee Vander had put on 10 minutes prior. “Violet is injured, but nothing that'll be permanent beyond a few scars. The worst damage I'm afraid will be to her heart and mind.” Jayce bristled at that, standing up from his seat.

“If she's got a concussion we should get her to a real doctor.” That struck a nerve as Silco set his cup down with a decisive thud.

“Her mind, boy, not her brain. Trauma, PTSD, heartbreak, loss, whatever the hell you want to call it. Apologies if I did not spell that out eloquently enough for you, or if you find my qualifications questionable!” Vander set a hand on his shoulder, and Silco stalled in his ass-chewing.

“We're all tired and worried about Violet. Let's not let that get to us.” Vander assured. Silco took a breath, smoothing down a pair of stray hairs that had escaped his coif.

“My apologies. I lost my temper. Your concern is reasonable, but I did not see anything indicating a lasting brain trauma. She’s resting, but I was able to rouse her. She… won't be joining us however.”

Jayce sighed and shook his head. “I’m sorry. You let us stay in your home and I was being impolite. My mother raised me better.” Silco sipped his coffee and he settled in at the dining table, leaving only one side unoccupied. “It is a lovely home.” Jayce said, hoping it might help. It didn't. A cat plopped up onto the table from the unoccupied chair across from Silco, a fluffy Persian with hair so white you could swear it looked blue wandered up to Silco. She received a scratch under her chin.

“Thank you.” Silco said, sipping his coffee, still giving the cat scritches until Vander set plates in front of Ekko and Jayce, and took a seat beside Silco, the last open side still unoccupied. “When we moved here It was a difficult place, both the home and the neighborhood were in dire need of repair. But it was what we could afford, and I think we made it quite a lovely home.” Silco rested his hand on Vander's.

“We had hoped to make it a home for Vi and Powder some day.” Vander said, his expression dipping for a moment, hand dropping down to the tired old dog still giving Ekko begging eyes for his food. “Never did work out like we planned though…” he tried to brighten up a bit. “But, that's different times. We’ll let Vi and you two rest and recover for a few days, send you on your way back to your lives. I'm sure all three of you have quite a lot waiting on you back in Denver.”

Jayce and Ekko exchanged a look, and Vander caught them in it. He shot Ekko a decisive stare down. Ekko cracked when Vander lifted his brow questioningly.

“We still need to talk to Vi about Denver.”

“Ekko, what have you done?” Vander asked over his plate of pancakes.

“We were waiting to talk to Violet about it. We thought with Powder being back in her life might numb the blow.” Ekko twitched in his seat. “I got a really good opportunity at a trade school in this town in Michigan called Thebes. Jayce got into a good college there, and I applied while we were driving out here. I just got accepted too… we leave in a week.”

Vander sighed, and clapped Ekko on the shoulder.

“Good for you. I know Benzo would be proud of you, making something of yourself. What are you going into?”

“I figure I'd make a pretty good electrician.” Ekko said, embarrassment creeping into his cheeks.

“Union?” Silco asked over the rim of his mug.

“Of course.” Ekko’s reply got an affirming nod from Silco.

“Good on you. I agree, Benzo would be very proud. But what does that have to do with Violet?”

“We're all she has back home.” Jayce finally finished, seeing that Ekko couldn't. “She's lived with my family for almost 7 years now. Besides my mother and I, Ekko, and half a dozen exes I don't think she's on speaking terms with, she has no one. If we leave her behind after what happened last night… I don't know how she'll handle it.”

“I think you're being a bit dramatic. She's a grown adult. You boys have lives of your own. Some things just can't be helped, there's no shame in it.” Vander said.

“We can't just leave her to rot.” Ekko griped.

“And when did I say to do that, young man?” Ekko looked embarrassed. “I'm not saying to throw her to the curb. I'm saying have a conversation like the grown adults I know you all are, and let her make her choice. If she doesn't want to go with you, well maybe a little time alone is what she needs.”

“That's all she's had the entire time I've known her.” Jayce mutters. “The girl spends more time under cars than she does talking to just about anyone. I have lived with her for most of a decade and I've never seen her unpack her bags. It's not that she won't want to leave her home that worries me, it's that she has no home to leave.”

“Home isn't a place, boy, it's people.” Silco interjected.

“Yeah, that's exactly the problem. It took me three and a half years of trying to finally get to a place where I think she counts me as a friend. But her home is Powder, I've watched her trying to fill that void for years now and it isn't working. She has Ekko, and you two, and that's it. What happens when that's gone?”

Vander looked more and more concerned as the conversation dragged on, but it's Silco that Jayce notices most. His bad eye twitched and his grip on his mug tightened to the point Jayce wondered if it would snap in his hands.

“Quit your damned worrying and talk to her.” Silco cuts in sharply. His tone softened considerably as he turned away from Jayce. “Ekko, dear lad, I think it'd be best that it's you who does it. Simply make her the offer, if she refuses it… I'll remind her she has always had a room open for her here. She never took us up on the offer before, but perhaps this bruise to her pride will make her consider it again. You will not, however, talk about her like she's some sick dog you are looking after, understand me, boy?” Silco asked pointedly at Jayce.

“I wasn't…” Jayce fumbled awkwardly.

“We know.” Vander assured. “I know, at least. You care, that's a good thing. Just be careful that care doesn't come across as condescension. Vi's proud, that whole family always was, and if she thinks you're trying to coddle her, she's as likely to take it as an insult as care.”

“I’m not trying to coddle her or treat her like a kid. I'm just… I'm worried. Last week I thought it'd be fine if she stayed back in Denver. But… she was willing to kill or die there to save Powder. How do you just… go back to normal from that?”

“You don't. You go forward. Find a new normal. Sounds to me like that's exactly what Vi needs. Maybe a fresh start will give her a chance to finally set down roots.” Vander picked up a scoop of his pancakes and chowed down. In the far corner of the room, Jayce saw the fluffy white cat, curled up into a ball, around which laid the massive mutt that had been begging for scraps earlier. He made eye contact with the dog, its black fur ruffling as it stared back at him sleepily.

“Can I ask what happened to the dog's eyes? One of them is all red.”

“Burst a blood vessel. Ran into the glass door one too many times.” Vander replied simply.

“She does it all the time, chasing after that cat.” Silco muttered over his mug of coffee.

Violet Dollanganger laid injured, battered and broken in a bed that had been meant for her 10 years prior. The bedding was plush and red, with a print a decade or so out of style, but the size was too small to make sense for a guest room. A twin mattress only made sense for a kid’s bedroom. There was a dusty desk in the corner of the room, and in the very corner of that desk, staring back at Violet like the blade of a guillotine, sat framed copies of the few surviving childhood photos of her and Powder. They’d been left in the bushes outside the building, when the keepsake box had popped open.

Vi stared those photos down most of the first day or so she was conscious. It felt like God's little sick joke to her, a consolation prize so miniscule she'd rather just have been told to fuck off.

Vi was 5, all chubby faced and apple cheeked, and Powder had just turned 3, the two were sitting with their parents on a bus going to something she couldn't remember, bundled up in winter gear and scarves, hand in hand together as a family.

Next to it there was a photo of the last neighborhood barbeque they ever had. It was in a run down little public park on the edge of their apartment complex, and someone had managed to snag a picture of Vi, Powder and Ekko eating at a picnic table together. The three of them each sat in line one after the other, smiling over half eaten plates of food. Powder was 4, and had pitched a fit when their dad had tried to put her in a boys swimsuit.

The first time Vi remembered Powder asking to be called her sister happened just a few months later. She forgot there was ever a time she was anything else. The fire took it all away just a few weeks later. Meanwhile, Vi was wearing a pair of Ekko's trunks and a T-shirt that she'd probably stolen from her dad, the way she was swimming in it.

The door opened slightly, but no one stepped in that Vi could see. She didn't move much to look, but a moment later, she felt pressure on the mattress, shifting slowly toward her.

A massive ball of fluff and whiskers entered her vision, licking at Vi's face. Vi tried to push the cat away, but she simply wouldn't stop trying to lick Vi's wounds. She may not know much, but she knew that couldn't be good for either the cat or her injuries. She pushed the cat away one more time, and it stopped licking, simply staring up at Vi with bright blue eyes that knew too much.

Another, much heavier weight joined them on the bed, and Vi saw a massive dog with a bloodied eye looking at her. It licked at Vi's bloodied knuckles, and she moved her hand away.

“The fuck are they feeding you?” She muttered. Vi felt the tension she held clenched in her jaw and finally broke her eyes away from the photos to glare at the hound.

She sighed and shook her head against the pillow. It all just felt like some sick joke. She'd failed to save Powder yet again, and here she was, greeted by some sick twisted version of what could have been. She could have done homework at the desk, in a room covered in posters she knew she wouldn't have to tear down with moment's notice. She could have slept every night in a bed that was hers, really hers. Her clothes in the closet, her shady shit stashed under the bed, her secrets known only by these walls, not spread out across a half dozen states and a dozen homes.

She saw shows always depicting siblings hating each other, being annoyed by one another, desperate for privacy. Violet wondered what that would've been like, to have her sister so close that she resented her presence instead of longing for it. Her eyes stung.

The kitten in her bed nuzzled against her, and licked at a tear on her cheek, before curling herself up against Vi's chest. The pup settled in at her legs, leaving Vi with barely an inch of space left to herself. The dog's head draped itself over her blanket covered hip. Violet wrapped her arm around the fluffy white cat, and sobbed into the white fur until her lungs ached and her eyelids were rubbed raw. For all her fussing, neither animal left her bed.

She fell asleep like that, and mercifully was able to sleep without a nightmare for the first time in damn near a decade.

Instead she dreamed of Lest.

Lest was stunning, with a soft jaw and pouty lips that loved to whimper her name. She dreamed of the smooth skin of Lest’s thighs bulging between her fingers, of pressing Lest’s knees to her chest and railing her into her mattress. Vi heard her moan and it was so sweet she wished she could drink it like wine.

Lest always had a very particular fantasy she loved to play out; she wanted to be a pin up girl. She wanted to feel beautiful, desired, lusted after.

Didn’t everyone?

Back then, Vi would do anything to make her feel exactly that. They’d spend hours in Vi's shop, Lest posing on this or that car Vi was working on, if it was pretty enough of course. When any other car was lacking, they could always just use Lest's Jag. She'd drape herself with grace and poise, barely dressed, pressed against the paint and the glass, and Vi would always be more that happy to play the doting photographer, naked from the waist up, packing a strap in her pants that couldn't wait until they moved on to the next part of the fun.

She dreamed about their last night together. Lest was splayed out over the hood of her Jag, on her back, one leg extended out toward Vi, the other pulled close to her chest, draped just right to cover the thong she wore and make it look like she wasn’t wearing one at all. She had her elbows propped behind her, pushing her chest together. Her eyes were like gold and saw right through Vi, it was one of the things she had loved about her. She never humored her bullshit, she said it plain. And when she wanted Vi, she made Vi feel absolutely addictive.

Vi reached down, past her camera, and moved Lest’s leg, spreading them wide for her and taking another few photos. She made eye contact over the top of her camera, Lest looking past her choppy blue bangs, clinging to her forehead from the sweat. Vi knew for a fact that she chopped them herself in her bathroom, but they never managed to look anything but absolutely stunning. Or maybe Vi was just a sucker for her.

She always thought it was the latter.

“Gonna keep me waiting down here all night, handsome?” Lest asked. Vi chucked the camera onto her bed, threw Lest over her shoulder, and dropped the now giggling and squealing woman on her back besides the camera. She kept giggling even as she unbuckled Vi's belt, one hand tracing up Vi's stomach.

Then Lest had her back to Vi, riding her strap for everything she was worth, as Vi clung to her from behind. Lest's thong was still on, just pulled to the side for the sake of getting Vi's strap sinking into her tight ass as fast as possible. Vi's arms were wrapped around her waist, helping heave her up and down as her poor legs started to tire out.

“God yes, Vivi more, please~!” Lest begged, and who was Vi to ever say no to her?

Vi pumped her hips faster and faster, blue hair clinging to her own sweaty face, nestled into her partner’s neck. Vi bit into the tender flesh of her shoulder and heard Lest moan.

Vi closed her eyes and breathed in the familiar scent of Lest’s sweaty skin, her sweet perfume, the floral shampoo she used. All the while she felt Lest take every inch of her cock like it was all that mattered.

Then the scent changed. Vi's eyes were still closed, but her nose was flooded with the scent of apples and cinnamon layered over sweat and lube and cum. The riding becomes more vigorous as the moans continue strange and new, higher pitched, now giggling instead of purring in her ear. “God yes, Vi, please! I need it. I need you.” Powder moaned in her ear.

Vi's eyes opened to see they were in the shitty bench seat of her truck, Powder’s pale skin glistening with sweat as she rode Vi's cock. Vi's hands gripped her sister’s hips, slamming her down and lifting her back up.

“Vi, please, I'm coming~!” Powder screamed. Vi sunk her teeth back in as she thrust even harder inside her sister’s body.

It was the best anything had ever felt on her cock.

She snapped awake to a porch black room, but she could still see the mud-caked pocket knife on her nightstand. It glared at her accusingly, and it's stare made So feel sick. She looked up at the ceiling, rubbing her eyes with the palms of her hands until she saw stars.

The animals were still there, and she realized someone had closed the door to her room.

She walked out into the hall, and for the first time since she got there, turned away from the direction of the bathroom and walked down the stairs.

Jayce was asleep on the couch, a pillow over his head but his mop of black hair gave him away quickly. Vi turned toward the kitchen to see that the oven light was still on. Basking in the light of it, pouring himself a cup of coffee, was Silco. He set his filled mug down, and picked up a second.

“Violet, my dear lad, I’m glad to see you awake.” Silco said softly as he poured another mug. He brought them both to the dining table, just at the edge of the oven light's glow. “Sit with me a bit?”

“Oh… sure.” Violet said, walking to the table. She took a seat across from two empty chairs, one of which Silco took as his own. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” He gestured toward the fridge. “We have creamer in there, some cinnamon sugar disaster Vander simply demands. I think it's more fit for ice cream than a cup of coffee, but I won't begrudge you if you indulge. Sugar is in the cabinet.”

Violet put on her best attempt at a smile, but sipped her coffee as he had poured it, strong, black, and bitter. Something in the bitterness, that absence of sweetness, felt familiar and soothing in its own way.

“Thank you” was all Violet can offer. Silco hummed at it, sipping from his own cup.

“Of course.”

“For everything, I mean. I don't know what we would have done without you letting us stay.”

“You needn’t have clarified, Violet. I understood.” He smiled at her, a tired, withered old thing that still offered her comfort and a warm cup of coffee. “Your friend and dear mister Ekko tell me you're quite an automotive hound these days. They tell me that you even put together Ekko’s car.”

“Yeah… I like fixing up cars a lot. Makes sense to me.” Silco smiled at her, brighter now.

“It's lovely, isn't it?” He sighed. “Knowing how to fix something when it's broken… knowing that it'll always be a question of which tool or part you need.” Silco sips his coffee. “I felt very similar, working the machinery in the mines. So much simpler, amongst the gears and chains.”

“Yeah…” Vi said, sipping her mug as well. She caught her reflection in the cup, her lip split with a nasty gash that would leave quite the scar.

After a moment of comfortable silence, the fluffy ball of white fur pranced onto the table in front of her.

“Ah, our dear lady back from her nap, I see.” Silco said with a knowing smile.

“It was you…”

Silco just gave his same thin smile.

“I have no idea what you're talking about, dear boy.” Was the only explanation Vi received. Silco took a few sips of his coffee, widdling away a couple minutes before he said anything more. “Vander is a much more practiced man when it comes to comfort and kindness, but he lacks subtlety, and it is so very awful to feel pitied.” The cat crossed the table to stand in front of Vi.

Vi scratched her chin, rewarded with soft purring. “What's her name?”

“Clouds.” Silco replied, catching the fluffy creature’s attention. “She was meant to be a housewarming present for you and Powder, along with that massive hound Vander insisted you would love.”

Violet pets at Clouds again. “Powder would've loved her. Both of em.”

“She will.” Silco affirmed. Vi went quiet for what felt like hours as she realized she didn't share his same certainty.

“... I failed.” Vi whispered. “She was in my arms… I had one more chance to get things right and I failed.” Vi’s voice cracked, and she braced her head between her hands. Silco stood and walked to her side, resting against the counter, a hand on her shoulder.

“My dear boy, you did not fail. You’ve been failed; by myself and Vander, who were charged with keeping you and your sister safe and happy, by a world that let you be separated after so much tragedy, and face so much more in trying to correct that rotten choice. You are not a failure, Violet, the world you were born into is.”

She'd thought she was done crying. She was wrong. The tears stung as they struck the wound on her lip.

It was a long moment before Vi was able to compose herself enough to speak. “I don't blame you guys… I hope you know that.”

“And I know that if asked about you, Powder would say the same.” Silco assured her, patting her shoulder again.

“I'm the oldest, I'm the one who was supposed to keep her safe, keep her out of trouble. All these God damned years she saw me as her knight in shining armour and the first chance I get to actually take care of her, actually be there, she has to be the one saving me.”

Violet shook her head in disgust, standing from and pacing back and forth along the table.

“It was supposed to be different this time. I'm not some kid, I'm a grown ass butch. I've fought so many god damned times and the one time I need it, really need it, I lose. Just like when I was a fucking kid!” Vi is snapped from her lamentation by Silco stepping into her path, placing a hand on each of her shoulders. He stood just about as high to her as Jinx had.

“Violet, you were a child. The weight of that responsibility should never have fallen on you. There is no failure to be forgiven, not then, nor now. If Powder were here, she would say the same.”

“I guess we’ll never know, will we?” Vi bit back bitterly, Silco slapped her across the face.

“What does that kind of talk help, young man?” He asked simply. Vi couldn't meet his gaze, looking down at the floor where Clouds nuzzled against her leg.

“I'm sorry.”

“And I'm sorry for striking you, but nothing else seemed to snap you from that state. Take a breath, please.” Silco asked. Vi nodded and took a moment as she heard someone at the base of the stairs.

“Everything good, Vi?” Ekko asked. Vi hadn't even heard him walking down.

“Yeah, little man, I'm okay. Just… decompressing.”

Ekko nodded, but didn't look certain.

“Ekko, my good man, I think you've actually arrived at the perfect time.” Silco clapped Violet on the shoulder. “Give us just a moment and then you two can talk?” Ekko nodded, and Silco thanked him and turned to Vi as he spoke. “I truly am thankful you found him again. I like him considerably more than the annoying one snoring on my couch.” Silco leaned against the table next to Vi, who rested her weight against it as well.

“Jayce is a good guy.”

“He's all worry and no action. I met many like him in the mines. They irk me to no end.”

“Cut him some slack. He walked in on his own dad having drank himself to death. I think any of us would be a bit of a worrywort after that.”

“... Fine. I'll make efforts to be kinder. Tomorrow.” Silco acquiesced. He'd never been very good at saying no to her. “Violet, Powder is a smart girl, has been her entire life. The amount of schemes and tricks she has used to contact us, to get us the information we needed to get her in contact with you, has always amazed me. This misstep is not the end of your stories together, I'm certain of it. She is too cunning and you both are too damned stubborn for it to be the case. You are the inescapable poles at the center of each other's lives, always have been, even after all these years apart. You two will see each other again, whether those jackasses who have taken her like it or not. There's only so many years where they have this kind of control over her. She will find her way back to you, when she does that, then you can be her protector. Help her find her way in a world she has been removed from.” He shook Vi's shoulder gently. “Just know that no matter what happens, you both will always have a home here with us.”

Vi worried the palm of her hand with her thumb, as flashes of her dream struck her. “What if it’s too late? What if we’ve become too different, spent too long apart?”

Silco sighed. “Family isn't fickle, dear boy. If it were, you two would have given up on each other so long ago, and I doubt you'd be here, injured as you are. No matter how much you've changed, you'll learn to love each other and be part of each other's lives however best you can. As long as you care for one another, things will find their way, place, and form. Just be patient. There is love and kindness in this world Violet, an overflowing amount, but only if you're willing to fight for it. I have never known you to back down from a fight.”

Vi paused for a second, standing one more time to wrap Silco in a hug. The scrawny man hesitated for a second, but wrapped his wiry frame around her in return, patting her gently on the back.

“Thank you.” Vi said.

“Of course, dear child. As I said, you'll always have a home here… do you need anything, before I retire for the night?” He asked, leaning back out of the hug.

“No. Thank you.” Vi said as she let him go. He smiled at her, gave her one more pat on the shoulder, and made his way toward the stairs.

“Coffee pot is still full. I'll send Ekko down in a moment.” He said to her, before pausing at the stairwell steps, grabbing a dog toy from the floor and chucking it at the couch. The big fluffy mut scampered after it, landing her fully bodyweight onto Jayce’s chest. “Good, you're awake. Ekko will be down in a minute.” Vi gave him a look, and Silco chuckled. “I said tomorrow.”

Jayce groaned in confused annoyance, eventually escaping his canine prison as Ekko made his way down. “Can we talk on the porch?”

They settled in on the front steps, the sounds of partying and what they decided to believe were fireworks in the distance. Vi kept her coffee in hand, leaning against the rail as the cold felt welcome against her tender flesh. A cigarette sat in her mouth as Ekko and Jayce both nursed their own cups of coffee.

“So what's up?” Vi asked, taking a long drag off her cigarette.

“Me and Jayce are moving to this college town in Michigan… there's some really great opportunities out there for us, and we don't want to leave you behind. I know it's a big thing to ask, but-””Fuckit. I'm in.” ”-I think this could be a really great chance for all of us to get a fresh start out somewhere we can really grow. I was thinking you and me could-”“-Fuck it, I’m in.”” figure out some kind of two bedroom situation since Jayce will have to live in the dorms, but like,” “Ekko!” Vi interjected for the third time, startling him from his pitch. She smiled at him and repeated herself.

“Fuck it, I'm in.” Ekko just looked at her for a moment, confused.

“Just like that?”

“You guys walked into a flaming shitshow for me like, two days ago, and dragged me out alive. Yeah, Ekko, just like that.” Vi said, clapping her arm over his back. “Besides, what do I have back in Denver besides the two of you? Literally 99 percent of my shit is in the back of your fuckin’ subaru.” Violet said, hugging him from the side.

“Holy shit, I was expecting this to be a lot more… I don’t know, complicated.”

“Maybe, just this once, I can be a little less stubborn. Just don't go getting used to it.” Vi said, sipping her coffee, offering the mug to Ekko. “To old friends.”

He clinked his against hers. “And new beginnings.”

Jayce smiled at her through exhausted eyes, and clinked his glass against theirs. “Maybe that’s exactly what I need.” Vi said with a grin.

“Sure, but when I say it about your dating life, I’m the bad guy.” Jayce interjected.

“Don’t start on this shit with my exes again man. Do not need that right now.” Vi responded, clapping him on the back as well.

“Fine. Can I go back to bed, then?” Jayce asked, feigning falling asleep, leaned against the wall.

“Dude, it’s only like, 10 pm.” Ekko replied as they made their way inside, away from the winter air. Vi finished her cigarette, tossing the filter back in her pack as she walked through the door.

“Doctor Kirraman?” The nurse says as she is scribbling a few last minute notes into her client’s chart. She's standing at the table spanning the perimeter of the nurses station, and the nurse is sat at one of the computers on the other side.

“Yes, how can I help you?” Caitlyn asks, looking up from her patient’s chart.

“We finally received the records for Miss Dollanganger. I uh, think there is something you may want to see. It's to do with her, uh, “partner”.” The nurse makes air quotes with her fingers, and Caitlyn feels her brows furrow. “I think it's best you simply see it for yourself ma'am.” She presses a button and Cait hears the whirring of the printer.

“I'm just saying. I feel like it's only fair we be aware that we're having to look after these types of degenerate hicks. I thought this type of thing was relegated to trailer trash in Alabama.” The nurse says snootily, sliding over a pair of documents. One from Powder’s chart, where Vi was listed under “Partner/significant other” by a staff during her intake, and page from Violet’s most recent doctor's visit where Powder was listed as a “sibling” in Violet’s self reported testimony. There's a piece of the next page, test results, in the scan at the bottom.

Caitlyn looks over the page from Vi's chart for a long, drawn out moment, and swallows at the horrifying realization that creeps up her spine.

“God, Vi, yes~!” Caitlyn moaned out, her back arched, head rested back against Vi's shoulder. Vi cupped a hand over her mouth, chuckling at the protest this raised from Caitlyn, not that that protest lasted long as Vi thrust up into her again, burying her cock to the hilt.

“Gotta be quiet, Cupcake. Don't want our guests to hear us, now do we?” Vi grunted into Caitlyn's ear, hand still covering her mouth. The music from the party was audible through the walls of Vi's shitty little apartment, bass thudding in a way Vi knew would get her a complaint from the crazy chick in the apartment below. But, that was tomorrow's problem. At that moment, Vi wanted to enjoy her little birthday surprise from Caitlyn. She'd only turn 25 once.

The heiress’s dress wasn't even taken off all the way. She hadn't been wearing panties under it, so Vi hadn't seen a point, just pulled down and up enough for Vi to get her hands and strap exactly where she wanted them. She pulled the hand away from Cait’s mouth, and returned it to between her legs, playing with her clit as Cait continued riding her.

“F-fuck!” Caitlyn whimpered under her breath. Vi shushed her, closing her eyes as she let herself get lost in the warmth of it all. The wet smack of skin on skin and the rushing blood in her ears drowned out the world around her, the music, even Cait’s moans. She could smell sweat and sex flooding her nose, her mind hitching at the honey and lilac scent underlining it.

She breathed through her mouth, and she could taste the salt on her partner’s skin even before she lapped at it with her tongue. Her partner dropped down onto her cock, grinding against her just right, and Vi couldn't help but moan.

“God yes, Po-” her breath hitched, biting down on her tongue to catch herself, grunting at the pain before quickly correcting. “Please, just like that.”

She teased along the length of her partner’s neck with her tongue, and when that made Cait moan she buried her teeth into the tender flesh. She grunted as she heard Caitlyn moan again, snapping her from her thoughts. She just needed to get off, and then they could go back to the party.

She moved her hands to her partner’s hips, and puts them to work, slamming her down as hard as she could, Vi grinding against the leather backpad of her strap with every thrust.

Then her mind wandered, like it had every time she was in bed for the last two years, ever since that awful night in New York.

She thought of light blue hair, and the scent of Apples and cinnamon, of Powder. Vi bit down into the tender flesh of Powder’s neck, and through the rush in her ear and the wet smack of skin on leather, she could fool herself that the moans were just a little bit higher. That fantasy was enough to make Vi slam the last few inches of her cock into her partner’s wet hole and feel all the tension and strain of her body drain out into one merciful orgasm.

Vi collapsed back onto her bed, Caitlyn falling down on top of her as the two are left one mass of sweating, panting, fucked-out flesh. In the middle of that little pile, Vi could try her damnedest to ignore the gnawing raw post orgasm guilt that had hounded her the last few years.

She pressed the palm of her hands into her eyes until she saw stars, as if she could wipe away the image of her own fantasies. Hadn't worked the last hundred times prior, but maybe this time it would.

Caitlyn sat up, grinding leather against Vi and sending a rush down her spine, before finally standing up, slipping Vi's cock out of her. She turned to face Vi, eyes still hungry.

“Your turn?” Cait asked hopefully, biting at her lip. Vi chuckled and shook her head.

“I'm spent, Cupcake. Came harder than I have in months. Really ought to thank whoever decided you should learn to ride horses.” That got her a slap on the arm and the deadliest of eye rolls. “Besides, we should rejoin the party. The guys will start realizing we're missing soon.”

“But you always make me feel good. I want to repay that.” Caitlyn teased, trailing a finger down Vi's sternum.

“Baby, I told you, I have a wonderful time giving you everything I have. I don't need anything back.”

“I know, I just… I feel bad. Like I'm being lazy.” Vi sat up, her stomach screaming from fatigue, and planted a kiss on Cait’s forehead.

“I'll tell you a thousand times, this is how I like it.”

Vi stood and started searching for her clothes. She took the toy out of her harness, but left the leather and slid her pants overtop of it all. Vi tossed Cait a pair of underwear from her clean clothes pile, a remnant from some previous visit. She kept meaning to make space in her closet and dresser for Cait to leave some clothes, but it just never really happened.

“Best to avoid any wet spots.” VI said with a wink.

“Oh you're going to be so smug about this aren't you.”

“Guilty as charged.” Vi replied. She pulled her shirt off the floor, a little patterned blue button down that still had her smokes tucked into the breast pocket. That craving hit Vi like a truck, if she had less shame her mouth would be watering at the thought of a cigarette. They always sounded great after she came.

Vi slid the button down on, but left it unbuttoned. Cait had just slid on her underwear when someone knocked on the door.

“Come on lovebirds. It ain't a party without the birthday boy.” Jayce called through the wall.

“Motherfucker.” Vi muttered under her breath, laughing just a little.

“He is such an ass.” Cait said, straightening out her dress.

“He's your cousin.”

“Not even. His mother and mine just grew up together. Go out ahead, it'll only encourage them if we walk out together.”

“Yes ma'am.” Vi said, checking herself for lipstick in her mirror. Her undercut was sloppy and in need of a retrim. The sides and back both had at least an inch to them, and the longer top was damn near to her chin.

The scar on her lip had healed down into a thick line. It was darker than the scars underlining her now flat chest, the product of a very generous gift from Caitlyn for their first anniversary.

Assured there was no obvious evidence of their fun, she walked out into the faded old apartment she called home, the door hinges to her bedroom screeching in desperate need of oil. The place wasn't fancy, a big shared living area lined on one side by a small kitchen, but it was all hers. Ekko had only moved out a couple weeks prior, having managed to find a one bedroom he could afford on his new wage.

The man himself was stood at the kitchen counter, grazing away at a bowl of dip someone must have brought. He was smack dab on the opposite side of the living space of Vi's apartment. Jayce was closest to Vi, at the tv fiddling with the volume on the music.

The tv area had two couches facing each other, and a loveseat facing the television, with a massive table at the very center.

Viktor and Mel both sat on one of the couches behind Jayce, sharing a single unit, sat just a bit too close on such a spacious piece of furniture for it to be friendly. They were chatting away about some philosopher well beyond Vi's reading level.

“There she is!” Jayce said, clapping Vi on the back. “I thought maybe the unthinkable had happened and you'd actually gone to bed at a half-decent hour.” He hiccuped at her.

“How much have you had to drink tonight, Jayce?” Vi asked.

“I have had a reasonable amount. I just had a scotch and soda and it gave me the hiccups.” Jayce was such a lightweight Vi could genuinely believe a single scotch and soda got him tipsy. “Besides, that's rich coming from you, Fireball.” Jayce responded.

“I've had a reasonable amount to drink tonight.” Vi defended.

“Bullshit.” Jayce called. Vi looked to Viktor, the usual arbitrator of these disputes.

“Oddly enough, only three drinks.” Viktor pitched in.

“No, she snuck a shot or three with Ekko half an hour ago and you didn't notice.” Mel added.

“Ah, that seems more likely.” Viktor nodded, and Jayce concurred. “Where is Caitlyn?” Viktor asked, getting a snicker from Jayce.

“She'll be out in a bit.” Vi said, giving Jayce a smack to the head. “And at least I can handle my liquor. I know your mother raised you better than this.” Vi taunted.

“Yeah she did with you too, and look how that turned out.” Jayce muttered as Vi moved past him to the loveseat, shaking her head and laughing.

Vi greeted the next person in the room to join their little circle, Loris. He was a building of a man, his mop of hair kept out of his face by a headband, still in his jumpsuit from the auto shop.

He and Vi had been coworkers the better part of a year by then. He took a seat on the other couch, opposite Viktor.

“Can I ask,” Viktor said to Loris, “where do you get your jumpsuits? I've been in need of more for use in my lab, but I can't find a decent supply.”

Viktor was a “Friend” of Jayce’s from the engineering program. He was in the study of putting weird ass machines and wires and shit in people's bodies from what Vi could remember Jayce saying. Vi could respect it from a “crazed mad scientist” angle, but it was funny how much of Just A Guy he really was. All Vi knew was that he worked with a bunch of weird ass fluids, so a few jumpsuits made sense.

“Uniform supply.” Loris replied. He was, as ever, a man of few words. “They're good about letting you buy bulk, but they'll fuck you if you seem like a chump. I can go with, if you want.”

“I have a pair of em that I got too small, Vik. If you want em, they're yours.” Vi said, looking over her shoulder to the Kitchen. “Ekko man, whenever you come back, mind bringing the Fireball?”

“You and your fuckin Fireball man.” Ekko said. “Yeah I got it!”

“So sue me, I like my whiskey with some flavor.”

“Sue you for what? Your collection of shirts you refuse to wear right?” Ekko taunted, setting the bottle and a cup on the table at the center of the circle.

“Hey man, invest this much money into your chest and you'll flash it around too.” Vi joked, pouring herself three fingers worth of whiskey.

“It wasn't your money that got invested, you fuckin sugar baby.” Ekko teased, settling into the couch seat that put him closest to her.

“What's with the ass chewing? it's my birthday!”.

“Just gotta keep you humble.” Ekko said, leaning over and handing Vi a card and a strangely shaped present. “Happy birthday, man.”

“Dude, I told y'all you didn't need to buy me anything.” Vi said, taking the card.

“Yeah, well I never really did follow your directions too well, did I?” Ekko replied, making Vi chuckle.

“Happy Birthday, To My Annoying as Fuck brother!” The birthday card read in massive letters cut out like a ransom note. Inside was a $20 card to this or that mega-corporation, and a note that read “to laying down roots, even when the soil is hard. Love you, Vi. - Ekko .”

She opened the package to see a tiny green sprout in a pot.

“It's a Ginko sprout. Ginko Biloba Pendula specifically. It's slow growing, will last in that pot a few years before it needs to be repotted. But they're resilient. Grow well under any conditions, city or desert, frost or scorch, they'll just… keep growing.”

Vi could remember even then, the sting in her eyes at being called Ekko’s brother.

God, how time only complicates life more.

Vi stood from her seat as Caitlyn entered the room again. Vi leaned over to Ekko, who met her in the middle and clapped her in a hug. “Thank you, brother.”

“Come on man, of course.” Ekko said back. “I'm proud of you. Hope you know that.”

“I know Benzo would be proud of you too.” Vi pulled back, wiping her cheek with the palm of her hand, still holding the fireball. “Okay, fuck, I need to stop now or I'm gonna start crying.”

Caitlyn laid an arm gently on Vi's shoulder, and settled into the couch on Vi’s opposite side. A few sips of liquor later, as Cait and Mel were chatting away about school, Vi felt that urge to smoke tugging at her again.

“Are you feeling ill, Violet?” Viktor asked.

“Happy as a clam, just craving a smoke.” She admitted with a chuckle.

“It's not good for you, you know.” Viktor taunted, not an infrequent event. He was quiet, and a bit awkward, but he and Vi got along well. “It can make chest tissue grow back.”

“Bullshit.” Vi called, sipping her glass. “No fuckin chance.”

“It's true. My doctor discussed it with me in detail during my own procedure.”

“Mine didn't.”

“Sounds like your doctor ought to go back to med school then.” He grinned at her and twirled his cane. It had been Jayce’s second year project, designed all fancy with some space age bullshit, but at least it was pretty. It could also apparently withstand a nuclear blast, but Vi wondered who that would help.

“Viktor, it's not nice to toy with the inebriated.” Mel teased, slapping his arm.

“No, you're right.” He assured. “But it is rather fun.”

“C'mon Vik, be nice.” Jayce chuckled, a Shirley temple in his hand.

“I'm being very nice. If I was not nice, I would not be here. I would be somewhere much quieter.” He still had a smile, but Vi couldn't tell if he was serious or fucking with her. He flashed a little smirk, and Vi grinned back.

“You fucker, you had me for a minute there.”

“I could tell. You're very easy to read, do you know that?”

“Yeah, yeah. You're not the first who’s told me.” She stood, placing her now empty glass on the counter.

“Where are you going?” Loris asked over his shoulder.

“Need some air.” Vi said plainly.

“Liar!” Jayce shouted from his place beside his two friends (?) on the couch. “She's going to smoke. Not even pot, cigarettes like she’s someone’s loser dad. And blues because God forbid she try anything or anyone that isn't blue.” Jayce blubbered drunkenly, the Shirley temple still in his hands.

“Hey! You don't see me giving you shit for your type being “petite and out of your fucking league” now do you, Major League Jayce-ball?” Violet retaliated.

“Put a fucking shirt on! And a coat, it's December!” Jayce shot back, and then the two broke out into cackling laughter fits.

“I'll be fine.” Vi replied, grabbing her father’s old lighter from her pocket, pulling a canvas jacket from the hook to throw over her still undone shirt.

A knock came from the door just inches away from Vi. She groaned, wondering if Ekko had invited Skye over again, or if Jayce had another person joining his strange “friend group” this evening.

She stuck the cigarette in her mouth, and opened the door, stepping out.

“Hell-” Vi stopped dead in her tracks, greeted by cold winds and pale blue eyes.

The cigarette dropped from between her lips, landing on the ground between her boots. The door behind her closed, leaving Vi in the dark and cold with a phantom.

“Are you real?” Vi said the words before her liquor-addled brain could stop them.

“Depends… are you?” Powder replied. Her face was wrapped in a scarf, a wool peacoat pulled tight around her body, topped with a bright pink beanie on her head with a ridiculous puffball at the peak.

Violet reached out, her fingers hesitating just inches away from Powder’s form. Vi swallowed the fear that this might just be another hallucination from a little too much booze, another hopeful dream that would end a nightmare. Powder reached up, meeting Vi's fingers with her own. They were so cold. How long had she been out here?

But she was there, real, present, in the flesh. Powder was standing at the front step to her apartment.

“Oh my God.” Vi choked out, before her sister rushed into her arms. Just like years ago, Vi's hands fell into place around Powder so easily. One arm around her sister’s waist, the other wrapping up her shoulder, clutching the back of her beanie-clad head, fingers burying themselves amongst soft pink wool and softer blue hair. She could feel Powder’s pink and blue nails grasping at her through the fabric of her jacket. She could feel Powder's breath hitch in her grasp, as she breathed in that apple pie scent that had meant “Powder” in her head for so long.

“I'm so sorry.” Powder choked out.

“God, you're here.” Was all Vi could manage for response.

“I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, I promise. I'm here. I'm here. I love you, and I'm here.” Powder whispered. The door opened again.

“Vi? Who… who is this?” Caitlyn asked from the doorway. Vi didn't know why she felt so startled by the interruption, but felt her body instinctively pull away at the same time as Powder all but leapt back from from her as she turned to see the occupents of the party all looking in their direction. Jayce and Ekko were already moving as Vi responded.

“Oh, Cait… this is Powder. My little sister.”

“Hi.” Powder offered meekly. “Most people just call me Jinx.”

“Powder, this is my partner, Cait.”

“You're sick.” Caitlyn says as she enters Powder’s room, snapping Vi from her own reminiscence. Cait closes the door behind her, and stands in front of Vi, arms crossed.

“Not the first time I've heard that from you.” Vi says, fatigue heavy in her eyes and her posture, more dripped over the bedside chair than sitting in it. Even still, her thumb raked over Powder’s knuckles. It's late, Cait knows that, but it doesn't stop her.

“A coworker of mine went snooping through your chart. Thought she should let me know a few things.” Vi pinches the bridge of her nose, a familiar strain ebbing into her body language.

“God, please don't tell me she's told everyone about us.”

“Of course not. I had her dragged to the admin for HIPPA violation and got her terminated. Any luck, her license will be stripped as well.” Caitlyn assures, before kneeling down to look Vi in the eyes. “You saw an oncologist last week.”

Vi swallows, looking out at the last ebbs of sunlight from the waning sunset out the window. “Cait, can we please not-”

“Lung cancer. Patient offered path of treatment, including radiation and chemotherapy, patient agrees she is fully understanding of risks and potential benefits of treatment or lack thereof, but refuses further consultation and treatment at this time.” Cait recites from memory. “Why? Please don't tell me you're stupid enough to think homeopathy and tea tree oil will fix this.”

“No, obviously not. Cait, please-”

“Then why, Violet?” Cait demanded. “Why refuse treatment when you are well aware there's still a path to recovery and remission? Signs show it’s early, it's treatable, but it's time sensitive.”

“... Chemo would've made me weak.” Vi admits begrudgingly. Caitlyn just stares at her. “Powder… she needs a lot of help around the house these days. Needed, I guess... Who would take care of her if I'm laid up in bed, too sick to keep food down? We have a decent savings, but two people on cancer treatment plus home health would burn through it quick. We have a kid to get through college, I can't be stupid about this shit.”

Caitlyn sighs. “Vi, I don't believe for a second that-” “-Cait I knew the choice I was making when I was in that fucking office. I don't want to talk about it right now, okay? Don't you have some results from that brain scan to get me?” Caitlyn is taken back by the response, only for Vi to continue, bitter and barking. “Except you don't. Because you left your damn computer logged in here, again, and lucky me, the results popped up before it timed out. You're not the only one who can memorize medical charts. “Patient neural function nonexistent. Per reading and rereading, the possibility of spontaneous return of neurological activity sits at near-zero.” We're here for Powder’s sake, not mine, am I right?”

Caitlyn looks down at the chart in her hand, and sighs. “Yes, that's correct.”

“Good. Then why don't you go ahead and focus on your fucking job and I'll take care of me. I have Ekko coming tommorow, and Isha should be in the day after. Once they've visited to say their goodbyes, we can make plans to… to put this all to rest.” Vi's voice cracks, and she stands up to storm off to the bathroom, pausing as she stands next to Kaitlyn. “Why the hell do you even care? I thought you'd be happy to see me rot. I can't say you wouldn't be justified.” Caitlyn is shocked at the reply, only to have Vi keel over in a coughing fit, tripping over herself. Caitlyn reached to help Vi, only for Vi to shove her hand away, stumbling up to her feet, walking to the bathroom and closing the door.

The party went quiet quickly, leaving just Powder, Vi, Jayce, Ekko and Cait surrounded by a periphery of the others. The last three were sharing the couch Jayce and his “friends” had shared earlier, while Vi sat next to Powder on the loveseat, hand in hand.

“Jinx, how did you get here?” Jayce asked, shockingly sobered by the seriousness of the situation (and his lack of actual alcohol).

“I… just walked away.” Powder offered with a weak chuckle. “I uh, ended up going to that school in Europe. It was exactly as isolated and awful as I expected. Nothing cartoonishly evil, obviously, just the type of place rich families ship their daughters to so they can be kept from getting knocked up by the poolboy for a few more years.” She gave a weak shrug. “They had a field trip, a visit to DC. Once we got to the States, I called the administrator, told them I was officially dropping out of the university, and just… walked away.”

“Just like that?” Ekko asked.

“I mean, yeah… It was the best chance I had. I was on U.S. soil, away from any of my family’s property, none of their bodyguards or agents were around to make some claim of this or that “mental imbalance” to get me locked up and released to their care… I spent a long time working it all out. I thought I was gonna be able to do it last summer, but… well let's just call it trial and error.”

“Jinx, is anyone going to come after you?” Caitlyn asked.

“I don't think so. They shouldn't even be able to find me.” Powder admits, holding up a little prepaid debit card. “I got this in my own name, my real name, a couple years ago. Filed a little bit of money away when I could. I chucked everything to do with Powder Foxworth. All I have is my bag.” She nodded to the moderately sized piece of luggage tucked in the corner of the room. “But that's fine by me. I always kinda packed light. Besides a few books, I didn't really have much to leave behind.”

Mel looked at Powder with a kind worry. “Jinx dear, I don't mean it as an insult but you look absolutely exhausted. Are you okay?” It was true. Powder was pale, even for her, and the bags under her eyes looked like they were carved into stone.

“No, not at all.” Powder assured. “I've always had trouble sleeping. Just a night owl I guess. The last few days have been really stressful, so that didn't help.”

“Yeah I mean it's not like she looks ill, she looks about as sleep deprived as Vi always does.” Jayce remarked idly, trying to reassure Mel with a hand on hers. He did not seem to comprehend that that was not assuring at all, even Vi understood that.

“Where are you going to stay?” Vi asked, and she could see the blush creep into Powder’s cheeks. It made her mouth dry and her fingers twitch.

“That’s kinda my one sticking point. I don't know. I have a little bit of money set aside to get my new life started, but rent would eat through it fast. I was gonna reach out ahead of time and try and ask around, but I didn't… I didn't want to risk disappointing you again.” She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, looking away from Vi. “I guess I could sleep on someone’s couch.” Ekko looked like he was about to speak but hesitated, leaving Vi to speak first.

“I have a room to spare. You can stay here. ” She declared, and Powder’s smile grew twice its size as she threw her arms around Vi, the old worn down Goodwill Leather sticking to Vi's skin where her shirt rode up.

Vi made eye contact with Caitlyn, giving a weak smile. Caitlyn looked back at her with that same loving gaze, and Vi felt the strangest guilt creeping into the pit of her stomach. The others stood and readied themselves to go for the night. Caitlyn was helping pack away the food in the kitchen when Vi approached her.

“I hope you don't mind me saying that without, you know, consulting with you first.” Vi said, scratching at the back of her head.

“Of course not. I'm overjoyed for you both, Violet. Besides, it's your apartment.” Caitlyn teased, pausing her task of packing up the dip Ekko had thoroughly decimated to lean over and peck Vi on the cheek. “Besides, she's your little sister. I may be a bit… possessive at times but even I'm not daft enough that you'd need to worry about me getting jealous of you spending time with your little sister. I think you and Jinx living together is a great idea.” Vi put on a smile and felt that same creeping shame flow in. Normal people don't feel guilty about living with their little sisters. Then again, normal people don't think about their little sisters every time they orgasm for nearly two years.

She told herself she was being a fool. That those fantasies in her head were just that, fantasies. Simple imagination that she’d probably get over after a few weeks of living with her little sister again.

Maybe this was the fresh start she needed. She'd start over, live with her sister again like they were kids, and her brain would finally course correct and make her able to orgasm without that fucked up guilt and shame, and the fantasies that brought it on. She’d suddenly understand all those sitcom families with the siblings who fucking hated eachother, and wanted nothing to do with one another.

It’d all work out, and Vi could finally go back to being a regular, everyday dyke with normal dyke problems.

When Vi turned to walk out to the living room, she saw Ekko and Powder sat at the loveseat, chatting and smiling like they were kids again. And, just like when they were kids, Ekko got red in the cheeks every time Powder so much as flashed a smile. Vi had always told Ekko never to go into poker. He was too good of a man, too honest, his body made of tells. He’d always been the one who kept Vi honest, then again she was a dogshit liar too.

Powder looked at her and smiled, her eyes drifting down to Vi's cheek and the blue haired woman behind her. Powder just kept smiling, but Vi felt guilt creep into her conscience yet again.

What did she have to be ashamed of?

Where to start.

The real question in Vi's head became why she saw that shame and guilt echoed back at her in Powder’s gaze before she looked back to Ekko. Eventually everyone began pouring out. Ekko and Powder made a plan to meet and catch up again over coffee at this little record shop nearby. He clapped Violet on the back and beamed at her. “Told you setting down roots was worth it, man. Happy birthday.”

Jayce reintroduced himself to Powder at the door, and introduced Viktor and Mel as his “companions” which was a new one for Vi. For both of them too, as they steered him out the door looking equal parts amused and confused. “Happy birthday man! Also you left your smokes out here in the snow!” He called over his shoulder.

Caitlyn offered Powder a hug on the way out, which Powder accepted stiffly.

“It's lovely to meet you. We should get to know each other more! Last thing I want is to be the partner her family loathes.” Caitlyn said with a chuckle. “Let me treat you to lunch tomorrow. Wherever you want. I'll bring some ideas for good local shops, since you're new to the area. Oh, and there’s a few lovely thrift shops Vi’s shown me around the area, I’ll take you to some! Got to restock the wardrobe, right?”

“Oh, uh, sure!” Powder said with a grin that pinched in the corners. Vi was struck by the resemblance it bore to the face Powder had made when she had broken Vi's favorite toy as a kid, but hadn't been caught yet. “That'd be wonderful.”

“Great! Have Vi give you my number, let's plan for noon!” Caitlyn said, giving Vi a quick kiss. “Happy birthday. Let me know if either of you need anything, okay?” She asked.

“Of course. Thanks, Cupcake.” Vi replied as Caitlyn walked out into the cold.

Loris offered Powder his hand. “Nice to meet you, Jinx. Your sister’s a dickhead, but she’s a pretty alright dude.” He offered simply. Powder giggled and shook his hand.

“I’ll have to judge the “allright” part for myself. But glad to see some things never change.” Loris chuckled and looked to Vi.

“I like her. She’s funnier than you.” He said, offering knuckles to Vi.

“Yeah well hopefully that consoles you through having to do your own timing belts from now on.”

“You’ve been threatening that since your first day, you little shit.” He gave her a hug and stepped out into the cold as well, closing the door behind him.

“He’s… not wearing a jacket.” Jinx looked at Vi, equally confused and concerned.

“Never does.” Vi replied. “He walks, too. I’ve seen him walk into work with literal frost on his eyebrows, not a coat in sight.”

“That’s… terrifying. I thought I was gonna freeze out there after 10 minutes.” Powder said with a laugh. She’d stripped off her coat, leaving her in a fluffy pink sweater and jeans.

“Why wait so long to knock?” Vi asked, hands stuffed in her pockets.

“I was just getting ready, you know. Psyching myself up.”

“More like psyching yourself out.” Vi teased. “The hell do you have to be nervous about, Pow?”

“I just… you know, didn’t want to mess up. For all I knew, Vander and Silco could've given me the wrong address or like, I could mess up and make your birthday all about me. Plus I mean, I didn’t even think to get you a present.” She looked down at her boots, and Vi couldn’t help but laugh. She nudged Powder’s chin up to look her in the eyes.

“Powder, are you fucking crazy? You’re here, you’re home, we’re back together again. I couldn’t ask for something better. You didn’t need to get me a fucking present. You’re the greatest present I’ve ever gotten.” Vi regretted the words the second they left her lips. Her finger, still hooked under Powder’s chin, dropped quickly as Vi hastily added. “You know, I’m just… I’m just happy you’re back in my life.”

“Y-yeah, of course.” Powder added hastily, blowing her bangs out of her eyes, suddenly finding the door very interesting to look at. “C-Caitlyn seems nice.”

“Y-yeah, I feel like the two of you will get along really well.” Vi said.

“So she's your… partner, then?”

“Yeah. Yeah, we've been dating for about a year and a half. She uh, she got me my job at the auto shop.” Vi swore she had hallucinated the disappointment in Powder’s expression. She had to have, she thought.

“That’s great, really. You two seem really… sweet together.” Vi chocked the awkward delivery up to just the awkwardness of the moment. She scratched the back of her head.

“It's kinda late. You're probably tired. We should get you a bed set up, y'know?” Vi said scratching at the back of her head.

“Y-yeah, that sounds like a good idea.”

The spare bedroom (formerly Vi’s bedroom until Ekko had moved out and she’d taken the bigger room) had a simple bar steel bed frame and a bare mattress in the middle of the far wall, leaving a u shaped channel around it. On the opposite side of the bed from the door, a small IKEA dresser sat gathering dust.

“Not much, but there's lots of space to make it your own. Plus, your door doesn't squeak, which is pretty nice.” Vi offered. “I'll grab you some fresh bedding, feel free to get settled in, unpack, whatever you need.” Vi said before walking to the linen closet at the end of the hall, grabbing some basic sheets and a pillow. It took her a minute, but she managed to get it all gathered.

She got back to Powder’s room and found the girl rifling through her splayed open bag.

“Damnit.” Powder muttered under her breath.

“What's up, Clouds?”

“I might have been rushing a little bit when I packed my bag. I uh… might have forgotten to pack pajamas.” she admitted, not meeting Vi's eyes.

“Rookie mistake. PJ’s have got to be one of the first things you pack when you move quick.” Vi said with a chuckle, setting the bedding down on the still bare mattress. “I can see what I have to spare if you want.” Powder smiled.

“Yeah, if you wouldn't mind. Maybe like, a T-shirt and shorts?”

“I'm pretty sure any shorts i'd have would dwarf you… is a pair of boxers doable?”

“Yeah that should work just fine. Thanks, Vi.”

“Course. Here, let me just grab em.” She comes back to find the bed made, powder sat on the edge of it fussing with the pillow.

“Satin pillowcases? Really?”

“They're good for your hair, sue me.” Powder chuckled and shook her head, taking the pile of clothes from Vi. “I threw you a couple extra just to tide you over till we can get you some more clothes.”

“Thanks, Vi.”

“Of course. Thank you.” Vi said blissfully. Her and Powder just smiled at each other, both seeming to really take in the fact that this was real. Powder was really home, Vi there with her. They had the chance to really be sisters again.

And here Vi sat, letting her filthy mind ruin it all. Her eyes drifted to Powder’s soft, pillowy lips, to the red creeping into her sister’s cheeks, probably still from the cold outside. Vi’s gaze dropped to the soft knit pattern of Powder’s sweater, the way it wrapped over the curve of her hip, the swell of her chest. Powder’s jeans were tight, and Vi could feel the effort it took to drag her eyes off of Powder’s thighs.

She swallowed down her shame and suddenly took a keen interest in the pattern in the door. “I'm uh, I'm gonna turn in for the night. I'm just across the hall. If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. Okay? I'm serious, anything.” Vi said. Powder nodded a little too quickly, looking for something she must have really, really needed in the contents of her bag.

“Y-yeah, thank you.” she paused for a second and rested her hands in her lap. “I love you, Violet.”

“Love you too, Clouds.” Vi replied, stepping out before she could find some way to ruin the sanctity of that moment as well.

She moved to her room and quickly started stripping. When she pulled the harness off, she was annoyed by how messy her boxers still were. Well beyond what should be there from her and Cait.

She chucked the harness on her dresser, reminding herself to clean the leather later. She grabbed for a new pair of boxers and some pajama pants, big fluffy blue ones she'd gotten from Cait for Christmas the year before. She saw the time on her phone screen, damn near 2 am, which for her was equivalent to going to bed at 6 in the evening.

Vi crawled into bed, the massive lumpy comforter feeling like a welcome shield from the world. Sleep, however, did not find her quickly. Water is wet, grass is green, and Violet Dollanganger couldn't fucking sleep.

She wondered if she should offer the pajama pants to Powder instead of her boxers. The thought of Powder walking around the apartment in nothing but a T-shirt and Vi's boxers would not help Vi in her present conundrum.

Even with Powder being so much smaller than her, those boxers would only cover so much. So baggy and flimsy they might as well not even be there. So easy to pull off and get them out of the way.

Vi pushed the thought of that away as she felt a familiar craving nibbling at the edges of her mind. She remembered Jayce’s comment, realizing she'd left the pack she had earlier out in the snow.

Christ, was she really willing to go smoke damp cigarettes in the middle of the Michigan winter? She checked her phone, 2:30 AM, well below freezing temperature-wise. Was this her rock bottom? Was this the shit that’d finally get her to quit, like every god-damned person had been telling her to since she was 14?

She could go to sleep and just smoke in the morning like she had a hundred other nights. She was so sure of herself. Then again, everyone is right before being massively humbled.

Vi turned over and pulled the covers over her shoulders, counting off cars she had worked on in her head, her own version of counting sheep.

She'd done the engine on Ekko’s Subaru, and then the breaks on Jayce’s fancy ass truck. She'd fixed just about every part on her beloved rustbucket. Then there was Peri’s car, that had to have been a Nissan. Then there was Lest’s Jag. God how could she forget Lest’s Jag. That thing was an absolute beauty. Polished to a mirror shine. All the better for fucking her on top of it.

God she could remember bending her over like a pretzel on the hood of that car, her legs dangling, face matted with blue hair sticking to her face, she had that pretty blue bob, just perfect for gathering a fist full to use for a handle. Vi could just imagine the sounds Powder would make with her strap-

Vi sat up and grabbed her phone off the bedside table. She opened her bedroom door, hinges squeaking loud as sin.

She made it to 2:45, she thought to herself as she threw her jacket on and fished out her dad’s lighter. She decided that she’d go sit out in the cold and smoke until she could be a normal fucking person.

Just a few minutes shy of 4 in the morning, Vi finally gave up. Her entire damp pack of smokes was gone, and just about every nonessential part of her body was numb from the cold.

She trudged in from the cold, hung her jacket on the hook, kicked off her boots, and sloshed her numb, perverted form down the hall to her bedroom. She closed the door, hinges screeching in need of oil, collapsed into her mattress, and proceeded to stare at the wall.

“Vi, you up?” She heard Powder ask from the doorway a minute or two later.

“Yeah.” Vi grunted out. “Can't sleep. Just uh, insomnia, I guess.”

“Yeah, me too.” Vi heard her swallow. “Vi, can I stay with you? Like when we were kids?”

Vi knew in her core she should say no. She was in the middle of some kind of fucked up spiral and that would do nothing but stoke it. She had a responsibility to keep her sister safe, and at that moment she felt like letting Powder stay would be throwing her to the wolves.

But, the idea of saying no to her sister asking for something so simple as childish affection after so long apart felt evil. Especially if it was just because she had spent the last two years being a fucking pervert and couldn't keep it in her pants. The thought was just too humiliating.

Vi lifted her arm and with it the massive comforter. Powder crawled in alongside her, and Vi let the arm down. It settled over Powder’s midsection as she nestled herself up against Vi's body. They clicked together like there was nothing to it, like they were back to being kids again, sleeping over in Vi’s bed because Powder had another nightmare. Truth be told, Vi had just as many, and they never really went away. The most Vi had to think was about ensuring her hand didn't drift too high.

“You reak of menthols.” Powder said with a fatigued chuckle.

“Sorry bout that.” Vi sighed and breathed in that soft apple pie scent. She felt her eyes get heavy.

“It's fine. But that stuff isn't good for your health.”

“Neither is living.” Vi replied.

“Don't pull that “sage old butch” bullshit with me.” Powder taunted over her shoulder. Vi sighed again. “Seriously, promise me you'll cut back."

“Ain't even here a day and you’re trying to change me.” Vi faux-lamented. Powder scoffed and slapped the top of the arm draped over her waist.

“Promise me. We didn't put all this fucking work in just for you to go dying on me.”

“I'll cut back. I promise.”

Powder sighed contently, draping her arm over Vi's, raking the pad of her thumb over Vi's scarred knuckles. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Vi replied, taking another deep breath in through her nose.

Time passed and Powder’s fingers began to slow. The last thing Vi heard before falling asleep was the soft snoring coming from Powder.

Vi wondered when she started snoring, and soon after fell asleep herself. It was the best night’s sleep Vi had gotten in decades.

The first thing she saw the next morning was that old, mud-stained pocket knife on her nightstand. She couldn't help but feel like the dagger was laughing at her. She wondered if all of Thebes could hear it but her.

Chapter Text

Vi was cooking breakfast in the morning, two months after her 25th birthday. It was a lazy day, still 2 days out from the start of her work week. At just about 8 o'clock in the morning, Vi was running on a downright decadent 7 and a half hours of sleep. She heard her door to her room squeak open and closed, and could hear Powder’s footsteps on the shity vinyl flooring.

“Morning.” Powder said with a yawn, popping open an energy drink from the fridge door. Vi was amazed how easily she did it without tarnishing the polish on her pink and blue nails. “You need to oil that fucking hinge.”

“I’ll get around to it.” Vi said, flipping an egg on her pan. “Over medium with salt and pepper?”

“Yes please. I'll get the toast.” Powder took a sip of her energy drink and set it down, grabbing a bag of bread and throwing slices in the toaster. She was wearing a faded old T-shirt to some “greatest hits of mullet rock”-ass band from Vi's dresser, along with a baggy pair of Vi's boxers that barely poked out the bottom of the shirt, it dwarfed her so much.

Vi was proud of the fact it only occasionally tripped her up to see Powder wearing her clothes nowadays. It usually wasn't even really about the clothes themselves. It would be something like seeing Powder’s nipples poking through the especially well-worn shirts. On this particular morning, it was her sister’s thong strings peaking over the waistband of Vi's boxers when she lifted the shirt a bit to scratch an itch on her hip.

Vi figured it was better that Pow was wearing underwear under her boxers, though that was kind of defeated by the damage of realizing her baby sister wore thongs to bed. Vi wondered if she had been doing that the whole time they'd been sharing a bed. Powder had gone thrift shopping with Caitlyn and Viktor twice up to this point, slowly building an actual wardrobe, and Vi would hazard a guess that those trips were not where she had gotten thongs.

Powder snapped her from her lamentation by grabbing her drink back up and hopping onto the counter beside Vi with practiced ease, her feet dangling off the edge, kicking lazily in the air. “You excited for the concert tonight?”

Thank God, something else she can think about. “Hell yes I am.” Vi said, grabbing the energy drink from Powder’s hand and stealing a sip. She choked on the sweetness. “Jesus how do you drink these things? Is this fucking Skittles? Are you drinking Skittles flavored shit at 8 am?”

Jinx stole her can back and flicked Vi on the forehead. “It's not my fault you like your coffee bitter and tasteless. You deserve a little sweetness in your life, do you know that? It's important to me that you know that.”

“My life is plenty sweet, thank you very much.” Vi said, flicking Powder right back.

“You asshole!”

“You flicked me first.”

“Yeah, but I'm a poor defenseless girl.” Powder feigned fainting.

“You started it!”

“Wow okay, transphobic much?” Vi rolled her eyes. They went through this bit at least 3 times a week. Vi flicked her on the forehead again. “You're such a dick. Good luck getting me to help you with your T-shot this week, dick.”

“Yeah yeah. Well this dick just made you breakfast.” Vi lamented the fact that she didn't realize how horny that would sound until after it left her lips, and quickly course-corrected. “Can you make sure the table is set?”

“Already did.” Powder said with a smile.

Vi nodded, sliding half the contents of her pan onto a plate, and the other on her own. She carried the plates to the dining room table, a recent addition Powder and Cait had found while out thrifting together. It was meant to “De-bachelorize” the apartment, according to Powder. Up until then, they'd just eaten their breakfasts on the loveseat. It was cramped, but had the best view of the TV. Besides, it wasn't like they were averse to the proximity.

This little morning routine of theirs wasn’t intentional. None of their routines were. They all just sort of fell into place. Vi’d wake up first and cook breakfast. Either she’d eat it with Powder, who usually woke up half an hour later at most, or leave her a plate in the microwave if Vi had to leave for work before she was up. They'd go about their business, come home, then whenever it was time to get ready for bed, usually decided by Powder, they'd both just so happen to get ready together, brushing their teeth in the bathroom side by side, and turn in for the night in Vi's bed. Vi could not remember a time she had gone to bed so consistently early and managed to actually stay asleep through the night since she was a kid. Even Caitlyn had noticed the improvement in the bags under Vi's eyes, and Vi hadn’t had any of the really bad nightmares in weeks. She’d had a few too many dirty dreams about Powder, but thankfully she'd avoided letting her perversion corrupt their little rituals outside of her own head.

Powder had slept in the guest room, her room, maybe a dozen times in the 2 months she had lived with Vi. Every single one of those nights being nights Caitlyn had stayed over. They never talked about it, never made a plan. They never really talked about their nightly routine at all. On nights Powder knew Caitlyn would be over, she'd simply excuse herself to bed about an hour earlier than their usual, and settle into the guest room. When Vi woke up the next morning, the routine would resume unchanged, save for a third plate being made.

It wasn’t weird, Vi assured herself. They'd slept the exact same way as kids, long before Vi turned out to be a fucking degenerate. It was just their little way of making up for the time apart, she told herself. Caitlyn probably wouldn't even have a problem with it if she knew about it, Vi assured herself. It was such a non issue, Vi didn't even think to bring it up.

God, she was hopeless.

Since the addition of the table and it's chairs, Powder had started cutting Vi's hair every other week to save her some money at the barber. She'd gotten pretty good with a pair of clippers, maintaining Vi’s tidy undercut. She also had started helping Vi with her testosterone shots. She had never been good with needles, hence her complete lack of tattoos, but Powder helped. Powder always helped.

Vi sipped her coffee, black and bitter, and felt herself craving a smoke. Keeping her promise to cut back was going about as well as a shotgun enema.

“Excited for your interview today?” Vi asked over her mug.

“Hell yeah I am! This tattoo apprenticeship could be my big break.” Powder beamed. “They have a super cool team, lots of different artists I could learn a ton from. This one woman does these really amazing neon designs, God I have to show you them. The shit goes crazy.”

“You showed me her stuff last night before bed, you goofball. @Sev-Ink-A right?” Vi asked with a chuckle. Powder got red.

“Oh yeeeeah. That's her.”

“I'm excited for you. How long does an apprenticeship run?”

“Usually like, a couple years. One year if you’re lucky, a quick learner, and find a good shop.”

“Well I'm sure you'll do great.”

“The only thing… it isn't paid.”

“Yeah, I'm aware. I've been around the block a few times, you know.” Vi assured, scarfing down a bite of sausage.

“Why do you insist on talking like a dad?” Powder teased, getting serious for a moment and she poked at her food. “But like… you're sure that's okay?”

“Powder, I make decent money. I've told you before and I'll tell you again, you don't need to stress about working right now. This apprenticeship is a good idea. You'll help with shit once you've got yourself set up.” Powder just looked at her guiltily.

“I promise I'll keep up with my chores around the place. I want to actually contribute something, make my own way.”

“You aren't my live in maid, Powder.” Vi pushed down that thought real quick before her brain could start thinking about certain outfits. “You live here, we share the load. If you want to take on a little bit more, and it makes you feel better, I'm not gonna argue, but focus on your apprenticeship and I'll consider that more than enough.”

“Okay, if you're sure.”

“Always am.” Vi lied.

“This is all assuming I get the gig.”

“You will.” Vi assured, chowing down on her breakfast, finishing just a couple minutes before Powder. The two cleaned their dishes off in the sink together and went about getting ready for the day.

As Powder walked away to shower and get ready for her interview, Vi's eyes caught the sway of her hips, and felt her mouth go dry.

Christ, this woman was going to kill her.

She popped a pack of smokes from her pocket and flipped it around in her hand, before returning it to her pocket. She had promised Powder she'd try. Not that that would last much longer.

Vi didn't have work that day, but there was a small cluster of tasks Powder had been asking her to do for a while, and Vi figured they were a good way to kill time until the concert. Powder took care of a lot more of the cleaning then she needed to, she insisted on it. But Vi was the handier one, so when it came to fix ups, those landed in her lap. So, nicotine cravings clawing at the back of her perverse mind, she threw herself into those tasks.

She was under the sink trying to fix the stupid fucking leak when she heard Powder talking.

“You okay if I borrow your truck?”

Vi slid out from under the sink only to find Powder standing over top of her. Thank Christ she was wearing jeans today and not a skirt, tight black ones that clung to her ass and stopped just below her belly button, leaving about a mile of skin exposed before the start of the crop top she had cut out of one of Vi's old tie-dyed shirts that had shrunk too small, and a faded denim jacket that was definitely from Vi's side of the coat closet. Even shrunk to hell, the crop top was massive and baggy on Powder.

Well, Vi figured she did tell Powder to borrow as much clothing as she needed to until she got her wardrobe remade. But it seemed like no matter how many times Powder went shopping, Vi's clothes always ended up on her.

“Yeah, just be gentle.” Vi reached for her carabineer but Powder snaked it off her belt loop first.

“God, you're such a dyke.” Vi shot her a glare, and she just smiled back “Of course I'll be gentle. Always am.”

“Wait,” Vi checked her watch. She'd started wearing it with her promise to cut back on her smoking, it was programmed with a timer set every hour allowing her a single smoke. “You said your interview wasn't until way later. Why are you taking her now?”

“Her? The truck is a her? God you're hopeless.” Powder said lovingly.

“Her name is Brandi, thank you very fucking much.”

“If you say that's because of Brandi Carlisle I'm gonna have to invent a new slur for you, I swear.”

“Fuck off my shit.”

“Oh my God it is! It totally is!”

“Whatever, while you're thinking up your new dyke-phobic slur, explain what you're doing with her this goddamn early.”

“Going thrifting with the girls.” Powder said, twirling the keys on her finger.

“You mean Cait, Mel and Vik?”

“Yeah, the girls.”

“You know that Vik is a trans guy, right?”

“Yeah, no shit have you seen the boy? But he's also a queeny twink, so like it works.”

“Okay, that's gotta be transphobic.” Vi braced her elbows behind her, sitting up with Powder’s boots still on either side of her hips. Powder leaned down, resting a hand on the kitchen counter as she hooked the keys on her own belt loop.

Vi didn't look where she hooked them. Vi didn't look. She didn't.

Right side, exact opposite of Vi’s.

“Our group chat is quite literally called “The Girls”, he's the one who named it. Does that settle your mind?”

“Fine, whatever.” She waved it off. “Just don't crash Brandi.”

“Yes sir.” Powder said with a mock salute. Her boots knocked against Vi’s as she walked away, her hips still swaying. Vi sighed and slid back under the sink. She checked her watch, twenty more minutes until she could have her first smoke of the day. God was she going to need it.

Caitlyn waited with Viktor at the corner of the sidewalk next to the entrance of their university when Jinx pulled up in the rustbucket. She stuck her head out the passenger side window and hollered at them. “Hey there Prettyboy, how much for the hour?”

“More than you can afford, young lady.” Viktor replied, deadpan. He opened the door, crawling into the middle of the bench seat, and Caitlyn joined him.

“Where’s Mel?” Jinx asked, her smile faltering a bit when Cait crawled in.

“She'll meet us there. She had some appointments on the other side of town this morning.” Caitlyn explained. “I'm still amazed Vi lets you drive this death trap. She treats it like it's more precious than gold.” Caitlyn griped as she took the passenger side of the bench seat.

“I guess she'd just rather risk me crashing it than have to drive me everywhere.” Jinx offered with a shrug.

“Unlikely. She drove me to and from her home and classes for weeks while she was fixing my bicycle, all because she refused to allow me to drive her precious truck.” Caitlyn lamented.

“I believe her name is Brandi.” Viktor said. Jinx looked very confusedly at him, before frantically refocusing on the road.

“How the hell did you know that?”

“It's written on the dashboard, here in sharpie… Or perhaps it's a paint pen?” Viktor scratched at the name on the dashboard. “No, no it's a sharpie.”

“Oh, dang, never saw that.” Jinx admitted, scratching the back of her head with an almost nervous chuckle. Caitlyn didn't understand how she could miss it, anyone sitting in the middle or passenger seat would've seen it.

They pulled into the parking lot of the thrift shop, and Caitlyn popped out of the passenger seat, offering a hand to help Viktor.

“Vik, maybe we can luck out and find you another jumpsuit for your workshop.” Jinx said, bouncing out of the driver’s side door.

“Perhaps. Loris was not kidding, those stores are cutthroat.” He said, shaking his head as he braced against his cane. Mel’s pristine silver car pulled up alongside them, and the woman stepped out, stunning as ever.

“Hello dears.” Mel said. “I’m not too late, am I?”

“Not at all. Just arriving.” Caitlyn assured, offering a hug to Mel that was gladly accepted.

Caitlyn had always liked Mel and Viktor. They got along well, and all had to deal with Jayce’s nonsense and by extension, Vi and Ekko’s. These little social calls breathed sanity into Caitlyn's life, especially when school got in her head.

Jinx’s recent addition to these little escapades had been an interesting process, but not an unpleasant one. The girl was sweet, excitable, and very intelligent about a very strange set of topics. But she also never seemed to actually relax around them, at least not around Caitlyn. They'd have great times together, and almost every time Cait would catch Jinx staring at her with this strange, conflicted mix of emotions on her face.

Powder got along amazingly with Viktor. As they walked into the thrift shop, Caitlyn could watch the two chatting on and on excitedly about the plans for later in the evening as they rifled around in the racks.

“So, you think you’ll do well?” Viktor asked.

“I hope so.” Jinx said as she pulled out a fluffy pink pair of sweatpants from one rack. “The woman that runs the shop is no joke. She's crazy good with her color work on like, any skin tone. Everything I’ve seen from her is just mind blowing, and I'm hoping she'll see my designs and give me a shot.”

“How did you find this woman?”

“She’s actually a friend of the family. Silco and Vander apparently used to work with her in the mines back in our hometown. It was this dusty little place in Illinois called Zaun.” Viktor smiled at her, a pair of overalls in his hands.

“Goodness, the world certainly is small.” He said with a chuckle and a shake of his head. “I haven’t heard those names in many years. My family settled in Zaun after coming over from Czekia. They brought me to some of the meetings Silco and Vender held.”

“No way!” Jinx bounced up and down, Viktor’s free hand in both of hers. “That’s amazing! Oh my god, wait, was your family in the fire?”

“God no, my parents did everything they could to keep us away from that godforsaken slum of a building.”

“Oh…” Jinx said, her face contorting into a rather devastating impersonation of a kicked puppy. Viktor seemed to realize his mistake.

“Oh… yours was, then?”

“Y-yeah. Hasn’t Vi talked about our family?” Jinx asked, looking between him and Cait, confusion evident.

“No, she doesn't talk about her past very much at all.” Mel said with a shrug. “I didn't even know she had a sister until you showed up. Truth be told, I had assumed Violet was lying when she first introduced you. I assumed she was cheating and came up with a sorry excuse.” Viktor gave her a look and she scoffed. “Oh don't act like you didn't think the exact same thing. You thought the exact same thing until Jayce confirmed it.”

“She didn't… talk about me?”

“Violet is just a bit quiet when it comes to everything you two have been through.” Caitlyn admitted, feeling bad for the poor girl as that same mournful expression crossed her face.

“Oh…” Jinx scratched at her arm, and Caitlyn could swear she recognized the butchered shirt. She wondered how many clothes she still needed to buy to borrow from Violet so much. Caitlyn stepped forward and rested a hand on Jinx's shoulder.

“It took months for Vi to tell me about even the beginnings of what the two of you went through. I think she's just sensitive, and hard to open up. Don't think anything of it, dear.” A mix of emotions replaced the kicked puppy dog eyes, comfort, guilt, anger, shame, guilt again. Suddenly, the happy go lucky Jinx she knew was back.

“Thanks, Caity-Kat. That means a lot.”

“Of course, Jinx.” The smile faltered.

“Now, on to happier topics.” Viktor tried to redirect, clearly sorry for the difficult emotions he'd dredged up. “Your interview!”

“Oh yeah!” Jinx said, still wearing a smile. “It's one of the best shops in town. I see their bumper stickers everywhere around the city.”

“Really? I wouldn't take Thebes to be a town with a bustling body modification community.”

“Given the state of some of the people at the University, it doesn't surprise me.” Mel chimed in, taking a place at Viktor's side, their arms looping together. “Perhaps if you and Jayce stepped out of your lab on occasion, you’d see that.”

“Now, why would we ever consider that, Lásko?”

“Perhaps so that we could actually see each other more often than when you two drag yourselves out for fear of Vitamin D deficiency?”

“A little deficiency never did anyone harm.”

“Oh now you’re just being obtuse.” Mel slapped him on the arm and grinned.

Jinx and Cait exchanged a confused look, shaking their heads.

“You two confuse the fuck out of me.” Jinx chuckled out.

“Genuinely confounding.” Caitlyn agreed.

“What?” The other two said in unison.

“You're a gay man and a straight woman who act like a married couple.” Jinx pointed out, rifling through the racks. “It's confusing, dude. I feel like you're gonna end up on conservative news shows as proof why gay people aren't real. That's not even counting the shit with Jayce.”

“Of which I would really rather not know anything. At the very least, it's perplexing.”

“Yeah, like don't get me wrong I'm not judging y’all. I'm the last person with any right to yuck someone’s yum, but like… dudes what the fuck?”

Mel stiffened visibly, which even in moments of stress was rare. Viktor patted her hand reassuringly, and simply returned a smile. “Some people just have different thresholds for affection. I think you two are making a fuss of nothing. Everyone’s boundaries are… different. I mean, dear miss Jinx, you and Violet are very close. Not everyone is so affectionate with their family. People are messy, it's the way of things.”

“Y-y'know what, you're so right Vik. Okay so anyway back to thrifting!” Caitlyn couldn't help but chuckle at Jinx seemingly admitting she was wrong. She seemed stiff about it, but then again if she'd been able to admit she was wrong easily, Caitlyn might have doubted she and Vi were actually related.

Jinx scratched at the back of her head and went back to the racks silently.

After a few minutes of silence from Jinx as the other three chattered on about classes and schoolwork, Jinx pulled out a tiny pink skirt and grinned at it, holding it up. “Oh my God, for the concert tonight? Hot or what?”

“Oh I love that!” Caitlyn said. “It will look great on you! I love that brand.”

“Oh, you bought them before?” Jinx asked, looking it over again, clearly not sure one way or the other whether it was actually worth buying.

“Yes, I wore them constantly, though not as much in the last few years. I actually wore a skirt very similar to that to my and Vi’s first date. She loved it.” Cait realized she'd gotten too comfortable in all the chat and gossip, and kicked herself internally. Jinx’s face yet again was a kaleidoscope of embarrassment, shame, and the briefest flash of anger. But when the tide settled Jinx looked at her with an embarrassed affection as she shook her head and laughed. “I'm so sorry, dear. That was much too much information.”

“You're fine, Cait, really.” Jinx assured as she dropped the skirt into her basket. “I'm not like, weird about talking about you and Vi dating. Just please for the love of God, keep it exactly as un-detailed as those two over there talking about Jayce. Last thing I need right now is to hear shit like that.”

“Oh absolutely.” Caitlyn assured. She found a cute little jacket off the rack that would be a fun addition to her wardrobe, and tossed it in alongside the pink skirt. “But I am glad that it's not, you know, some landmine topic. Violet is my first real relationship since I’ve come out. I’ve never had to navigate “the family” with a partner before. I'm still terrified of meeting those men you two always talk about.”

“Oh, Vander and Silco? You don't have to worry about them. They're puffballs. Marshmallows made into people. Silco puts up a good front, acting all scary, but honestly? His heart is even bigger than Vander’s. I'm sure they'll love you.” Jinx's eyes settled on her own boots as she chewed her cheek. “I mean Vi clearly does. And it's obvious you're nuts about her.”

“I am. Honestly, my biggest problem is trying not to be too crazed about it all. I can be a bit… possessive at times.” Mel giggled at that and Caitlyn shot her a look.

“Oh?” Jinx asked, bumping her hip against Cait’s. “What's the story, morning glory?”

“Shall I tell it or will you?” Mel asked.

“It's really not that bad, there was wine involved, it happens.” Viktor tried to assure.

“Oh my God, Caity-cat did you get tipsy and cause a scene?!” Jinx exclaimed, giddy to hear more.

“Okay-” Cait began, “it wasn't that big of a deal. We were at a little social for my university, and Violet had snuck onto campus to attend. She had walked off for some reason, I think it was to use the restroom, and after a little while I got worried-””-8 minutes. She was gone for 8 minutes” Mel added quickly.

“Oh my God you were tracking the minutes?” Jinx asked, giggling. “Respect, hun. That's commitment to the bit.”

“It felt like much longer.” Caitlyn tried to defend herself, but opted to move on quickly instead. “Anyway, I saw Vi talking to this woman, who seemed very intrigued with her, and may have had an… outburst.”

“She drunkenly called the security guard, who was checking to make sure Vi had a ticket to the event, a homewrecking whore.” Mel explained. Jinx laughed so hard she curled over and started clutching her sides.

“Oh fuck, that's awesome!” Jinx choked out between laughing fits. “Honestly, valid. Why the fuck where they picking on Vi anyway?”

“To be fair, she had been pretty brazenly sipping from a flask most of the night, which is a pretty good way to get security’s attention.” Viktor contributed.

“Hmf, she does enjoy her liquor.” Mel sighed out with a roll of her eyes.

“And the cider, don't forget the cider.” Vik added, similarly unimpressed.

“Hey, lay off.” Jinx said.

“Agreed. So Violet has a higher tolerance then most. We don't help that by gossiping. Besides, she's been doing much better lately.” Caitlyn added as well. “Or should we go back to talking about your all's little socials together with Jayce every weekend?”

“Hmm, Viktor dear I think I've found one of your jumpsuits.” Mel said quickly.

“Ah, thank you.” Viktor said, taking the jumpsuit off the rack and the two very hurriedly moving in the direction of the dressing rooms, mostly to just avoid the conversation.

Jinx and Caitlyn sighed in unison.

“That is really fucking funny though.” Jinx said, nudging Cait with her elbow.

“I know, but it's so embarrassing. And it earned me quite the reputation. Vi is so hesitant around other women now because of me. She was worried about me being jealous of you living with her, I wish that was a joke. I mean, that's just ridiculous.” Caitlyn said with a chuckle and a shake of her head. Jinx gave an almost pained laugh.

“So real, haha. It'd be so silly for us to be jealous of eachother…”

“Although i can't lie, I may be a bit more demanding on Vi’s time in the later months of this semester. I stay with my family during the summer, and I try to get as much time with her as I can beforehand.”

“No yeah, that's totally reasonable.” Jinx mumbled, sorting through the aisle, seemingly just relieved to not be talking about Caitlyn being jealous of her anymore.

“Jinx…” the younger girl's eyes looked absolutely terrified as she looked at Cait.

“Y-yeah, C-Caity-kat?”

“I just wanted to say thank you.” Caitlyn said. “Vi’s been doing so much better since you've been back in her life. She's been smoking less, she seems so much happier, so much more present. God, she's finally sleeping through the night for once. I just… thank you, dear. Really. I was getting so worried about her, but it feels like for once in her life, things are looking up for Violet and I can't help but think that's all thanks to you.”

Another kaleidoscope of emotions, from pride, to guilt, to shame and something so much more painful than all of it. But after a beat, Jinx looked at her and smiled in a way that crinkled the corners of her eyes.

“Of course. I'm not gonna act like it's not totally selfish on my part. I… it's been really nice getting to have her back in my life. Things’ll never really be like I wanted,” she swallowed and quickly clarified “You know, like… getting to just have normal sister lives together growing up. We won't ever get that time back is what I mean. But uh, I like the life we've made for ourselves. It's been nice. And I really have enjoyed getting to know you. It seems like you did a lot of good for Vi too. She really has a life built for her here. Thank you for, you know, working so hard to be so nice about me becoming part of it again.” Jinx wiped the corner of her cheek. “Okay, fuck, I'm not crying in a stupid thrift store.”

Caitlyn offered a hug, and Jinx took it. They pulled apart quickly after, moving to another isle of racks.

“What about this?” Caitlyn held up a faux corset top.

“Ooh, hot. Very “dominatrix-y”.” Jinx said with a little sway of her hips and a crack of a fake whip. Caitlyn rolled her eyes.

“Maybe not for me then.”

“Come on, live a little, Caity-Kat!” Jinx encouraged. Caitlyn looked at the top and tossed it into their basket. “Hell yeah!”

“I am almost guaranteed never to wear it.” Caitlyn promised.

“Still, it'll be fun to have. Plus, come on, you could wear it for the concert tonight.” Cait shook her head and chuckled. “Oh whatever, you know I'm right. Oh, it’d look great with this!” Jinx said, picking a leather skirt off the rack and tossing it into the basket a second later.

“I suppose so. I can give it a try in the dressing room.”

“This stuff has been really fun, you know. Getting to shop with you and everyone I mean. But like… I don't know. Hanging out with you is kinda… cool.”

“Really? I was worried we were boring or that you and I just… weren't getting along.”

“I know, I've been weird and stupid and getting into my head about shit.” Jinx admitted. “But I'm trying to move past that. I'm trying to move on, even if it's… you know not a perfect process.” She kicked the basket between them gently with her boot. They had a lot more scuffs in the leather, and Cait had no doubt Vi would adore the chance to polish them. “I don't know, it's just like… this is the kind of stuff you always see sisters doing in the sitcoms and shit, you know? Shopping, gossiping, getting to have fun. Even if we had the chance to grow up together, to be normal, I’d’ve never gotten these kind of fun big sister moments with Vi. It's nice, you know, getting to have em with you, getting to femme out a little.” Cait smiled at her and rested her arm on her back.

“Femme out, is it? I didn't realize you were a lesbian too.” Caitlyn beamed.

“I… I don't know if I am.” Jinx admitted, scratching the back of her head. “Maybe I picked the wrong word. But I just… I don't know, I mean I can like boys. I guess I don't really know what I like all in all. You know, not a lot of chances to explore sexuality when you're bouncing between private school, home, and the psyche ward isolation unit. There's like, one or two people I know of that I can really call “my type”.” Jinx looked back at her boots, red creeping into her cheeks and shame into her eyes.

“Well, now is a good time to let yourself explore. Figure it out for yourself. I didn't figure it out until I was around your age.” Jinx chuckled.

“Relax, I'm like, 3 years younger than you and Vi. 3 and a quarter if we're technical but that just means ages always seem weird and inconsistent.”

“Regardless, who knows, maybe you'll run into some nice butch out there at the concert tonight who’ll sweep you off your feet.” Caitlyn returned the hip-bump from earlier.

“Yeah, I'm not holding my breath. Wanna go try these on and then head out?”

“Absolutely. Mind dropping me and your and Vi’s apartment on your way to the interview?”

“I would, of course. But I have my interview after this. I don't think I'd have time.”

“I supposed I could ask Mel, but then I'll have to tag along for whatever tasks she has before she can drop me off.”

“True, but you could probably change over at her place beforehand.”

“I suppose so… shall we, then?”

“Follow me, Caity-Kat.” Jinx said, hooking her arm through Cait’s.

Cait feels her mind pulled back to reality by another late night call bell from the nurses station. A nurse stands up and gets it before Cait can use it as an excuse to not stare at paperwork any longer.

Cait wipes a tear from her cheek with the heel of her palm and returned to her charting. She chews her cheek, looking down at the bracelet around her wrist. She bought it a few weeks prior at a little stand in a farmer’s market. Pristine pink, green, and powder blue beads lacing over the chord.

They'd been so close, once. They all had. Things had made so much sense then, even if only because Caitlyn had been so oblivious.

She misses that, the closeness if not the ignorance it was built on. But could one have ever existed without the other?

The guilt and shame in Jinx’s expressions made so much more sense in retrospect. To crave something so desperately, knowing how wrong it was, must have been such an awful burden to bear. What must it have been like, to have it flaunted in her face every single day that Caitlyn had everything she wanted? The fact that they’d been able to be so close as they were then was a miracle.

And yet it had all gone so terribly, horribly wrong.

Vi managed to finish most of the tasks on Powder’s list by her 5th cigarette of the day. She opted to call it from there. Wouldn't make sense to exhaust herself before the show.

About half an hour later, Vi was just getting out of the shower when she heard a voice through the thin walls.

“Violet?” Caitlyn called.

“In the bathroom, cupcake.” Vi called back, towel wrapped around her waist as she grabbed a tiny bottle from the counter, smearing some of the cream on her face.

The bathroom door opened, cold air wafting in as Caitlyn entered and took stock of Vi. She was already dressed for the show, a tight purple corset top tucked into a short leather a-line skirt ending just above her knees, leaving bare, smooth skin all the way down to her boots. “Well hello there. Hope I'm not bothering you.”

“Mmm, you? Never.” Vi teased back, recognizing that twinkle in Cait’s eye. She grabbed a pump from the much larger bottle on the counter, smearing it up her arms.

“Are you… moisturizing?” Caitlyn asked, like she was asking if Vi had just been made pope.

“Uh, I think that's what this shit’s called.” Vi picked up the bottle. “Moisturizing body lotion” written out in big bold text.

“Who are you and what have you done with my partner?” Caitlyn asked with a giggle.

“What?”

“Violet, I've been trying to get you to moisturize for almost 2 years now.” Caitlyn exclaimed with a laugh.

“Yeah, well, you never told me it'd stop me from getting so damn itchy when it’s dry out.”

Powder hadn’t needed to.

“I most certainly did. You won't hear any complaints from me. I had thought you felt a little softer as of late.”

“Not where it counts.” Vi said with her usual shit eating grin.

“No, not at all.” Cait said, only partially rolling her eyes. But still, she dragged her hand slowly up Vi's bicep, and Vi couldn’t help stroke her own ego with a flex. “I'm just happy you're taking better care of yourself.”

“I've taken care of myself just fine, thank you very much.” Vi replied.

“You've done great at keeping yourself alive, my beloved. But it's been so great seeing you thrive and grow into your own and actually start taking care of yourself these last few months. Have you been sticking with your watch?”

Vi slid the box of smokes over on the counter. “Yes ma'am. You can check yourself.”

“I don't need to. I trust your word, my love. But I am proud of you.” Caitlyn slipped behind Vi, hands settling on both of Vi's arms. “I think that deserves a reward.” Caitlyn placed a kiss at the base of Vi's neck, looking at her in the mirror.

“We've got like… an hour, max. And I still need to get ready.” Vi said over her shoulder, even then not being able to stop the grin on her lips.

“I know, I'm sorry dear. Mel took forever with her tasks. But, I suppose you'll have to decide what you want quickly, then.”

Maybe that was why her morning was so rough. Cait had been working hard with classes, they hadn't seen each other in almost a week, and Vi had been having a hell of a time trying to rub one out. She was just pent up, that was all. She'd fuck Cait, get that energy out of her system, and then be able to be a normal functioning member of society again.

“Get your ass on the couch, now.”

“Oooh, now that-” Vi didn't let her finish, impatiently picking her up over her shoulder, sauntering out into the living room and dropping Cait on the couch. She was giggling as Vi pounced on top of her, towel still around her waist.

Caitlyn always was a sweetheart to her. She grabbed Vi by the shoulders and pulled her into a long, tender kiss. They had to pause for a second because Cait couldn't stop giggling. Vi took the chance and latched her lips on Cait’s neck, as she felt perfect polished blue nails dig into her shoulder blades. “Mmmm, Vi be careful. I don't want to walk around all night with bruises.” Vi chuckled in her ear.

“Don't worry, cupcake, I'll be gentle.” Vi assured, just barely nipping at the flesh of Cait’s neck. She knew Vi too well for her own good. Vi set her hand on Cait’s knee and felt her legs spread without a word. Her fingers met wet lace, and Vi felt absolutely spoiled. She also felt like she'd been played like a damn fiddle. “You fucking succubus, you had this planned the whole time.” Cait laughed, only to whimper a second later when Vi teased her clit in retaliation.

“Mmm, you tease.” Cait choked out as Vi slid her fingers under the lace, teasing her clit directly before dipping her fingers down, wetting them and teasing her entrance. “Violet, please.”

“Mmmm, please what?”

“Please fuck me. Y-youre the one who said we needed to hurry.”

“Mmm, you're so right.” Vi grinned as she slid one, the two fingers into Cait’s cunt.

“Oh God.” Cait moaned at the sudden stretch. Violet gave her a moment to adjust, and curled her fingers, just to be a bastard. The whimpers that drew out were very encouraging, and then she pumped her fingers as hard as she could. “God, V-vi!”

“You said we needed to hurry.” Vi muttered in her ear, fingers feeling along Cait’s insides for that bulb of nerves. When she found it, she pressed it for all she was worth. She flicked her thumb over Cait’s clit. Her moans dug into Vi's ears as her nails carved into Vi's skin. She could feel Cait pulsing around her, and knew she had to be close, so she gave absolutely everything she could. Violet couldn't help but imagine her moans being higher pitched, her hair being lighter blue, the nails dug into her back being painted pink and blue.

The door flung open as Caitlyn came on Vi's fingers. Powder sauntered into the living room damn near half an hour early. Whatever she may have said died in her throat as the two locked eyes, all the while Vi could feel Cait throb around her fingers, and her dick throb as her eyes raked over Powder’s body, and Powder’s gaze dripped down over the entire scene before her.
Vi watched the red flood over her sister's cheeks, her lips parted just so slightly as she took in the sight of Vi. It must have only been a second or two between when Jinx walked in and Ekko walked in behind her, but it felt like hours.

“Hey, what’s-” Ekko saw the state of the room, yanked Powder back out, and slammed the door.

Vi thanked and cursed God for Ekko as Cait realized what had just happened.

It took twenty minutes for Vi to get Caitlyn out of her room.

“I can never look Jinx in the eye again.” Cait groaned on the other side of the door.

“Listen, Ekko got her out of here well before she could have seen anything. Besides, from the door, she would’ve just seen your back and your head.”

“... you’re sure?”

“Double checked myself.” Vi assured. Powder did, however, get quite the eyeful of Vi.

Cait finally unlocked the door and walked out into the hallway. “There’s my sweet little cupcake.” Vi said, setting her hands on Cait’s hips. “We can still have a good night, okay?”

“Am I being silly?”

“You’re being human.” Vi assured, giving her a peck on the cheek.

“Okay…” Cait took a deep breath.

“I thought you doctors were supposed to be above all that “oh the human body is gross” stuff?” Cait rolled her eyes, which Vi took as a good sign.

“I’m going into neurology. The most embarrassing thing I'll see of a person is the inside of their skull.”

“Well would you rather she walk in on you getting brain, then?” Cait slapped her in the arm. “Okay okay, bad time for jokes. Give me just a few minutes, I gotta get dressed.

Several heavy, slow knocks came from the front door as Vi stepped out of her room, finally clothed.

“Come in.” Vi said, wiping her hands off on her nicest jeans, they only had a few oil stains, mostly on the knees too. Shit was fancy.

Powder walked in alongside Ekko.

“Okay so she does know how to wear a shirt.” Ekko said, hands in the pockets of his green windbreaker.

“Busting out the wife pleaser is a little on the nose don't you think?” Powder joked.

Vi looked confusedly down at her simple black tank top.

“Oh you don't wanna start there little miss “never remembers to close the door to the bathroom when she showers”. It's called a tank top, thank you very much. So what were you two up to?” Vi asked, quickly trying to redirect the conversation.

Powder held up a plastic bag. “Gas station run.”

“No, I mean before that. I thought you had your interview. When did you squeeze in hangout time?”

“Oh, no, that was actually just great timing on my part.” Ekko said. “I pulled up right behind your truck at the entrance to the block. No joke, I couldn't even tell it was Jinx driving.”

“Oh, okay.” Vi looked back to Powder, raising a brow questioningly. Powder looked back at her, confused, her cheeks slightly red. “Well, how’d the interview go?”

Powder looked disappointed and relieved for a fraction of a second before her face split into a grin. “I got it! I start the day after tomorrow!” Ekko and Vi clapped as Powder struck a little pose, still holding the bag of gas station goodies.

“That’s great, Pow.” Vi said with a grin. “What are the hours?”

“Looks like I’ll be starting about an hour after you, and getting out half an hour prior.”

“Shit, well I guess that’ll make transport easy. You can take my truck as long as you're fine dropping me at work and grabbing me after your shift.”

“Of course!” Powder said.

“Greetings.” Viktor called from the doorway, sauntering in with his cane, followed close by Jayce and Mel.

“Jinx dear, you seem absolutely bubbly. What’s the occasion?” Mel asked, as if she didn't already know.

“I got the gig!!” Powder hastily explained, doing a little dance as Vi heaved a sigh of relief.

Things were fine. They’d be fine.

So why the fuck was there still a burning in the pit of her gut and a throbbing between her legs?

While Mel and Powder sat on the couch chatting, whittling away the last half hour or so until they had to leave for the concert, Vi kept feeling eyes on the back of her neck.

Every time she’d look, she’d just see Powder, smiling happy as can be. But there was something hungry in those pale blue eyes. Vi swallowed down the tension boiling in her, and chased it with a sip of cinnamon whiskey, the first of many. Her flask would be her best friend tonight.

Vi had no idea what musician Powder and Cait had been so excited to see, but from the attire of the audience Vi assumed it was the single gayest cowgirl in the fucking world. The opening act was on, base pulsing in Vi's chest in a way that felt amazing as it mixed with the liquor swirling in her system. She still had a massively overpriced plastic cup full of watered down whiskey in one hand.

Vik, Jayce and Mel had disappeared somewhere a while ago, and Vi was left as one point in a diamond with Ekko to her right, Cait to her left, and Powder across from her.

Powder had changed, a tight, bright pink miniskirt and fishnets replacing the jeans she'd worn to her interview, but Vi's modified tie-dye and her baggy leather jacket stayed in place. The damn jacket covered more of her legs than her skirt when her arms were down. Vi was ashamed to admit she could tell Powder had taken off her bra.

God above, she was just hopeless.

One thing that hadn't changed though, was that storm behind the younger woman's eyes. Something was roiling in Powder’s mind, and every time their eyes met, Vi's body wound tighter.

The night followed a very consistent cycle. Another song played, Vi downed another shitty whiskey from the bar. They'd all dance together, and Vi would do everything she could to keep her eyes on Cait. She'd make it a decent way through, she really was trying. But then inevitably, Vi felt Powder’s eyes on her, and couldn't help herself from looking back. Every single god damned time, Vi felt it get harder to pull her eyes away.

Powder’s smile was always a little wider, her eyes hungrier, her hips a little more mobile, her skin that much more slick with sweat. The sweat stuck her shirt to her skin, making it that much more obvious that she had abandoned her bra at home. Vi could've sworn in the flash of the lights she saw Powder wink at her.

Vi had made it through the opener and to the main event with some of her dignity intact, if not her liver. Her tolerance was award winning, but she hadn't been drinking anywhere near her usual for months by then. Even with the watered down concert house whiskey, her flask and her constant trips to the bar meant she was plastered.

The liquor had been meant to alleviate the tension in Vi's body. But her dick was still throbbing and her entire body felt like a wound up spring waiting for the opportunity to snap. For the moment, the dancing was helping her. Then, of course, the music had to slow down, something romantic and sensual now humming out of the speakers.

Caitlyn leaned into Vi's form, her back up against Vi’s chest and her head draped back onto Vi's shoulder, eyes closed, letting the music vibrate through them.

Ekko wasn't nearly so bold. He stepped away, quickly shouting something about grabbing drinks. Vi wrapped her arms around Cait’s waist and let her chin rest on her partner’s shoulder. She let her own eyes drift closed as she listed with her partner to the tune.

But she’d never been able to deny Powder what she wanted, and Vi could feel Powder’s eyes on her, begging her to look back. Vi let her eyes open again.

Powder was swaying to the same song. To anyone else’s eye, she’s just been dancing to the tune and enjoying herself alone. Vi knew that was the reality, but their eyes would meet just frequently enough, just long enough, that some part of her, that decrepit, shameful pit in her gut where every gross urge rested, wanted it to be anything but that simple.

Then the song ended, the spell broke, Cait opened her eyes and laid a kiss on Vi's cheek, and the tempo shot back up. Vi saw a flash of jealousy across her sister’s face, followed so swiftly by shame and guilt, only for it all to be gone and replaced with a smile at the next flash of light.

A guy walked behind Powder in the crowd, and Vi watched his hand disappear as he walked. Powder yelped, stepping away from the guy, stumbling back until Vi caught her, leaving her standing beside Vi as she shouted over the music. “Cop enough of a feel, you fucking perv!?”

The guy laughed, some dickhead beside him laughing along with him. But the two squinted at them in the dark.

“Are you a fucking guy? Dude I think you felt up a guy!” the buddy cackled, the handsy son of a bitch getting red in the face, stepping in like he had lots to say.

Ekko was coming back by then, moving like he intended to step between the guy and Powder. Caitlyn was already waving down security, but in the wave of pink and denim it'x be half past too damn late before they’d get there.

“You got something to say to me you fucking tranny bi-” Like that, the tension in Vi's body snapped. A whole night of liquor and immoral, perverse sexual tension found its release in Vi's knuckles smashing the grope-happy motherfucker's nose into a coarse, bloody paste.

The guy spat blood everywhere, a wild flailing blow in retailiation landing squarely across Vi's jaw. Her off hand grasped at the guy's lapel to pull him back for a second shot, but slender hands pressed on her chest.

“He's not worth it.” Powder assured. When that didn't slow Vi, she pushed harder. “Vi, down.” She said, her lips inches from Vi's ear. Her breath was hot against Vi's neck and its smell laced with liquor. Vi didn't try and push past her. Powder pressed on her chest and Vi stepped back. Powder kept just as close as Ekko stepped between Broken-nose McGrabAss and Powder, but the second guy wasn't so lucky.

The son of a bitch spat out “Jesus, you better keep your bitch on its leash unless you-.” just to be cut off when Powder wheeled around, a sloppy but powerful cross smacking into the guy’s throat, knocking him on his ass and the wind out of his sails.

Security decided to arrive then, pushing the two groups apart. Vi wrapped her arm protectively around Powder, pulling their bodies flush against each other as the two were pushed back.

“They fucking started it!” Powder spat, her tiny frame shaking in Vi's grasp.

“I’ve got you, Clouds. You're okay.” Vi whispered in Powder’s ear, arm still tight around her. Powder gripped Vi's arm in both of hers and heaved a breath.

“You guys good?” Ekko called.

“Vi, God, you're covered in blood. You both are!” Caitlyn said in shock.

“It's not ours, it's his.” Vi barked out, teeth still bared. They were all drowning in the sound, and Vi's arm was still wrapped around Powder, eyes trained on the exact son of a bitch as he and his buddy were escorted away into the crowd. Vi was breathing heavy and deep, and could feel Powder doing the same.

“Vi, you two should get cleaned up. God knows what kind of diseases that man may have. There are some bathrooms on the other side of the venue!” Cait shouted in Vi's ear. The threat gone, Vi realized just how tight she was holding on to her sister, arms quickly letting go as she stepped back. Powder stiffened visibly, still shivering, vibrating with tension. “Jinx looks pretty shaken. I don't think she should go alone. I think there's some family bathrooms, maybe it's be best you go together.”

Poor, sweet, innocent Caitlyn had no idea what she’d just done. Vi looked at her like a man looked at the devil offering a handshake at crossed roads. Then she nodded.

Vi, still stood there behind her sister, leaned forward, resting a hand on the opposite shoulder. “We should wash up.” She whispered in her ear. The flashing lights couldn't hide the goosebumps creeping across the miles of her sister’s bare skin, Vi could feel them under her fingertips. Powder looked up at her and nodded, lips twitching upward for just a moment.

Vi took her hand and led her through the crowd. It took damn near 10 minutes to reach the family bathrooms at the very back of the venue. The line was short, but took a good long while to sit through.

A giggling couple sauntered out of the bathroom they walked into, a pretty femme in a cowgirl hat and pink boots leading some shaggy haired butch, who hadn't quite managed to wash off the lipstick marks on her face, out by her carabiner. Vi and the butch made eye contact as they passed each other. The butch giving her a wink and a smile that sang “good luck”.

They must not have noticed the blood. Or maybe they had, and Vi and Powder were just that obvious.

The door closed and locked behind them, and Vi went straight to the sink, grabbing for a fist full of paper towels and wetting them under hot water. There was a toilet stall to her left, and a barstool nestled between the stall and the sink for some God forsaken reason.

“Are you okay?” Vi asked, eyes locked on the sink. She couldn't look at Powder.

“I'm gonna be fine.” Powder assured, resting a soft, small hand on Vi's arm. “Thank you.” She whispered, her hand rubbing the tense muscle. Vi kept her eyes on the sink.

“Of course. I promised you I'd always protect you. About time I finally followed through.”

“We were kids, Vi.”

“I still promised.” Vi finally looked at her, she was so close, just like she had been out in the concert.

“You just can't help being my knight in shining armour, can you?” Powder whispered, the sweetest little smile on her bright pink lips. Vi felt tears pull at her eyes, swallowing down every feeling of guilt, pride, and perversion that phrase brought to her mind.

“Do you um… do you want help?” She gestured uselessly toward the stack of wet paper towels in her hand.

“Please?” Powder asked, her face the perfect little pout. Vi just could never say no, even when she knew she should have to this whole idea. She cupped Powder’s clean cheek in her free hand, dabbing at the blood, washing her sister clean and feeling absolutely filthy inside.

The blood splatter dripped down Powder’s chin, chest and stomach.
Vi figured the shirt was probably trashed, but once Powder’s chin was cleaned, she just kept looking at Vi with those big baby blues, that storm still brewing behind them. She made no motion to take the paper towels from Vi's hands.

Vi’s hand crept down and rubbed away the blood on her little sister’s stomach. Her fingers brushed against the smooth tender skin, and Vi could watch the goosebumps spread out from the point of contact. Her breath was uneasy, her head swimming and not just from the booze.

When the blood was washed away from Powder, she took the towels in her hand. “Let me help you. Please.”

Vi knew she should say no. But she just nodded.

A steadying hand rested on Vi’s chest, guiding her back until she was sitting on the barstool, and Powder wiped Vi clean of the blood they shared.

She started with her face, tenderly dabbing at the spot where she had been hit. Vi could tell that was gonna bruise good. Then Powder moved to wiping at Vi’s neck, then her exposed shoulders, down her arms to her bloodied knuckles. She was so tender as she wiped at the scars. Thankfully, the skin hadn't been broken in the fight. The scar tissue was thick, well worn.

Powder wiped the blood from her hands last, and then the paper towels were dropped unceremoniously on the floor.

She still held onto Violet's hands, thumbs tracing idle patterns over the scars on her knuckles. Vi couldn't look at her, her eyes instead fixed on the pink and blue
Tipped fingers dragging soothing circles that only made Vi feel more and more like a spring under tension, waiting for the opportunity to snap.

Her mind was frantic. The fight should have helped, she thought, the fight should have released the tension. She wanted to smoke so Goddamn bad, but she couldn't make herself move. She focused on trying to steady her breathing, eyes still fixed on those beautiful nails.

“Vivi, please look at me.” Powder whispered, her pleading voice coming from so much closer than it should've.

She knew she should walk away, they had cleaned up, they could go back to the concert before they would be missed. She knew that she should've just stood up and gone, everything good honest and decent in her screamed to do just that.

But Vi could never say no to Powder. She knew what would happen if she looked into those baby blues, and a dirty selfish part of her wanted it so fucking badly she couldn't say no to it, either.

Violet looked up and saw no veneer over the storm behind her sister’s eyes. Powder looked at her hungrily, lips parted ever so slightly and curled into a hesitant, pleading smile.

Then Vi was on top of her.

Their lips crashed together sloppily, all liquor and instinct, thought completely discarded like bloody paper towels. Their teeth clicked against each other as Powder buried her fingers in Vi’s hair, grasping at the crown of her skull and pulling Vi deeper. Vi wound her arms around Powder, one hand clasped over Powder’s hip, the other grasping at her shoulder. She heaved the woman up, pinning her against the bare tile of the wall. She heard Powder moan into her lips, felt her nails digging into her back, legs wrapping around Vi’s waist and clinging to her.

Powder slid her tongue, sloppy and desperate, into Vi’s mouth. She tasted like cotton candy and vodka, so sickeningly sweet that Vi understood why Powder loved those sugary energy drinks. Powder tried to pull her tongue back, Vi sucked, sloppily pulling it back into her mouth before swirling her own tongue around Powder's. Then it was VI's turn. Her tongue in Powder’s mouth, Vi squeezed the shoulder she was clutching so hard she heard Powder gasp and whimper. She'd leave a bruise, and she didn't think enough to care. Vi dragged her nails down the entire length of Powder’s back, from her bruised shoulder to bruised hip, before trailing her fingers up and down Powder’s stomach.

Vi pulled her lips away from Powder's, hearing a desperate whine and feeling Powder’s fingers pulling at her hair. Powder’s hips were rocking, grinding herself against Vi's body. Vi latched her teeth into the base of Powder’s neck, grasping her hip just as desperately as she had her shoulder, pulling Powder closer, rolling her hips into her sister's frantic thrusts and being rewarded by a whimpered, desperate moan.

Vi bit down harder, dug her fingers in tighter, everything she could to just feel Powder underneath her, against her, with her. The door shook with a few heavy knocks, some distant voice shouting about time being up.

Then the spell was broken.

Vi pulled her mouth back, taking a shaky breath in as her mind caught up with the rest of her. Jinx felt her grip loosen, quickly bracing her legs under her.

They stayed there for a long moment, panting and just staring at each other, two deer caught in the headlights.

“Vi?” Powder asked, fear knit itself across her face just like the smeared pink lipstick. That fear told Vi everything she needed to know. Vi stumbled backwards, no distance between them feeling far enough to be safe from Vi ruining it.

She was afraid of Vi, how could she not be after what had just happened? Grinding, moaning and hair pulling all turned to trying to squirm out of Vi's grasp,trying to call for help and failing, trying to tear Vi off of her.

Vi felt her back hit the stall wall, her drunken stumbling knocking the stool over. Her eyes trailed across Jinx, greeted by evidence of her guilt already appearing. She could see bruising already forming where her teeth had been on Jinx’s neck. Her shoulder and the opposite hip had marks from her fingers digging into Jinx’s, into her sister's, flesh.

Vi’s eyes just kept moving from her neck, to her shoulder, to her hip.

Neck, shoulder, hip.

Neck shoulder hip.

Neck-shoulder-hip-shame-shame-shame-you-were-meant-to-protect-her-what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-you?

Vi puked in the toilet. She could have lit the contents of that bowl on fire, they reeked of so much liquor. Jinx placed a hand on Vi’s shoulder, and Vi jerked away, falling against the stall and frantically pushing herself up. She couldn't look her sister in the eye, wiping the puke and lipstick from her face with her hands before running for the door. “I’m sorry.” She pitifully whimpered.

“Vi!” Jinx called after her. So long to get back to her and there Vi was, running from her.

She stumbled out of the venua and typed out a quick text to Cait.

VioletDollanganger: I’m sick, going home, I’m sorry.

It was true in more ways than one.

Vi managed to get into the back of a cab spit out her address without puking. Her head was swimming, her body hurt, and she knew her boxers were going to be a mess. But that ache in her core was the least of her worries.

The tears came before she could stamp them down. They tore at her eyes and she couldn't help but sob.

What had she done? How could she ever look her sister in the eyes again? God, she'd promised to protect her literal seconds before trying to devour the girl whole.

Drunk fingers moved before Vi could think better, the speaker of her phone pressed into her ear as the line rang and Vi sobbed. She knew one person on the earth she could trust who would be awake at this hour.

“Violet?” Silco answered, and Violet thanked God. “It's the middle of the night, dear boy, is everything okay?”

“Dad… I fucked up.” Vi choked out, feeling like she was back to being 6, confessing to shoplifting candy to her mom. “I hurt her. I didn't mean to, everything just moved so fast… they were right. They were always right.”

“Violet, slow down. Take a breath. I need you to answer me carefully. Is Powder injured? Is there blood, sprains, anything broken?”

“N-no. Nothing like that. I think the worst is s-some bruising. We were at a concert, I lost track of what was going on.” Silco sighed with relief.

“Okay, that's good. Bruises heal, wrongs can be righted, we can make amends for our mistakes.”

“B-but-”

“Violet, you and Powder are family. Family doesn't let a single mistake shatter it.”

“But I… I hurt her.”

“... My dear, I know what it is to have hurt people you didn't intend to, far more than most. I think that you're old enough that perhaps, another time, I can talk on that more. Trust that I know it hurts. But as long as there is a real, genuine intention to be better, to make amends and better yourself, family forgives. I have no doubt that Powder will forgive you. Self loathing will eat you alive if you let a mistake destroy you, and that will do nothing but deny you the chance to make things right. I beg you to take me at my word on that.”

“O-ok. S-so how do I do that? How do I make this right?”

“Well, whatever harm was done is done, it can't be taken back. There may be hurt or distrust there, but as long as you work to ensure it doesn't happen again, the rest is up to Powder and yourself to decide together.”

“Okay… okay I can do that. I can do that… thank you.”

“Of course, my dear boy. Now, are you safe?”

“Yeah, yeah I'm okay. I'm in a cab, driving home. I… God I feel sick.” Silco sighed.

“I have no doubt. But it's good that you're safe. Do you want me to get Vander?”

“No.” she snapped. Vander would pry, Vander would ask for more details, details Vi wouldn't be able to fake this shit-faced. Vander would Know. “No, I'm okay. I'm sorry to bother you.”

“Your well being has never been a bother to me, dear boy. Call me when you're feeling better.”

The line went dead, and Vi realized she had received a text back from Caitlyn.

Cupcait: I'm sorry you're not feeling well sweetheart :( do you want me to come with you? Jinx is back with us, Ekko could bring her home, I can look after you, make some soup?

The text was almost 20 minutes old.

VioletDollanganger: No, stay.
VioletDollanganger: You were excited. Too sick for company. Talk to you tomorrow
Cupcait: Okay, sounds good. I'll bring you something hearty tomorrow. I love you, Violet.
VioletDollanganger: I love you too

Vi sent her last reply as the cab turned a corner. She rolled down the window to the cab and lit a cigarette, black clouds gathering in her lungs. She lit another one right as the first finished.

She stumbled her way into her apartment, and into her bedroom. She fiddled with the old knob, pressing and turning it sloppily until it finally locked in place. As she had a hundred times before, she collapsed drunk onto the bed, hastily stripping to her boxers and nestling in for a restless slumber that never quite came.

She was sadly awake to hear the others return. She heard Cait knock on her door, and when she got no response, walk away with a whispered “I love you”.

She heard Ekko settle into a bed on the couch, too sloshed to drive home. She heard Ekko start to snore, and 45 minutes later she heard Jinx cross the hall to her door.

Vi heard her try the knob three times before she gave up.

“I’m so sorry.” She heard Jinx whisper through the door. Vi, even swimming in liquor like she was at the time, wondered what in the world she could have to be sorry for.

No, Vi was the oldest, Vi was an honest butch, Vi was the one responsible with keeping her sister safe. She had failed every step of the way. She's been failing for years, worst of all the last couple months.

Silco was right. The first step to righting the wrong was ensuring it didn't happen again. So, she figured, remove that temptation. Establish some healthy boundaries, and let her and her sister have a normal fucking relationship.

The morning showed up like a sucker punch. Vi puked around 6 am, thanking God for her bedside trash. She fell back asleep, and was woken up at 9 by a hellish migraine from the sunlight. She groped around bleary-eyed for a bottle of Tylenol and a few glugs off a long-discarded water bottle, and found some semblance of sanity. She saw the mud smeared pocket knife on her bedside table, mocking her. Her watch buzzed, she could have a smoke.

The buzzing watch was hastily discarded onto the floor.

She crawled out of her room and into the kitchen. Ekko was already up at the dining table, a phone pressed to his temple. “Hey, Markus, thanks again for this opportunity man. I should have an answer for you in a few weeks… yeah man, you too. Solidarity.” He said, hanging up before looking to Vi, holding up his mug. “Made a fresh pot, man.” he said with a grin.

“What’s got you in a chipper mood?” Vi asked with a chuckle.

“Kick ass opportunity this summer. One of my buddies from school might have a summer gig a couple states over that could get me a lot of on-the-job experience, really get me jumpstarted on my career.”

Vi poured herself a mug, dragging herself to the table, clapping Ekko on the back congratulatorily on the way past before settling across from him.

“Good for you, brother. And thanks for the coffee.” Vi mumbled, sipping at the mug. It tasted bitter on her tongue, making her nose scrunch.

“Too strong for you? That'd be a first.” Ekko joked, taking a sip of his own.

“Just not for me this morning.” Vi hobbled to the fridge, pulling one of the massive stockpile of energy drinks in the door. She didn't bother reading the flavor. It was fruity and sweet, even with “Zero Sugar” written on the label. But it did what it was meant to do, and Vi felt something soothing in the syrupy battery acid. “Guess I'm just not feeling good.”

“Yeah, Jinx said you puked after the fight.”

“Yeah, guess I drank too much. I uh, think I blacked out. Don't really remember much after breaking that guys nose.” Vi lied through her teeth before sipping the drink. “She say anything else?”

She pulled the pack of smokes from her pocket and lit up there in the kitchen. Her watch still left discarded back in the room.

“Not much. She seemed really embarrassed. Said in all the chaos she tripped in the bathroom, came back all banged up and bruised, thankfully nothing serious, far as I could tell. But she got a real worried call from Silco.” Vi remembered her phone call, her drunken sobbing. God she was pathetic. “Me and Cait made sure nobody messed with her the rest of the night, and Cait dropped us back here. Figured you wouldn't mind me briefly returning for a stay at our old abode.” Vi nodded.

“Of course not, man. You've always got a place to lay your head here, you know that. Thank you for taking care of her.” Vi said with another long drink and a drag from her smoke. “You still got your key, right?”

“Of course. And yeah, She didn't really need me, I just wouldn't feel right fucking off and leaving her alone after some shit like that.” He tapped his knuckles on the table a few times, fidgeting before he finally spoke up again. “Hey, Vi man, can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure, hit me with all you’ve got.” He fiddled with his mug.

“Listen. I know Jinx just came back into your life pretty recently, and I want you to know I haven't had any like, malintentions or anything with how much I've been around these last few months. But… well I mean, you know I always had a crush on her as a kid.” Vi felt her stomach lurch as she realized where this was going.

“Yeah, little man, I remember. You two were inseparable.” Almost as bad as her and Vi.

Almost.

“Yeah, well… guess I never really figured out how to grow out of that. I think I may want to ask Jinx out.” Ekko admitted. “But, she's your sister, and you’re my brother, you're both really the closest thing to family I have in my life. I don't want to make shit awkward by making life messier for you.”

“You asking me my permission or something? She's a grown woman, she can make her own decisions.”

“I know that. That's not what I'm asking. I just never want to put you in a position where you'd have to pick between us. Cus let's be real, I know which is winning there. But really, Vi. If you told me that you think it's not worth risking our friendship, I would respect that.”

Ekko was honest, forthright, and considerate. He was a cavalcade of everything Vi knew herself not to be. Vi figured it didn't hurt that him being in Jinx’s life would keep her busy, making it that much harder for Vi to have a relapse of judgement.

“Man, I’m not gonna get in the way. Just please don't make it weird.”

Pot meet hypocrite kettle.

“I'll do my best.” He said with a chuckle.

“Seriously though, Ek, I appreciate you being up front with me.”

“Of course. Besides, pretty sure this is the least of my worries. I don't even know if I've got a shot.”

“Hey, you're a passionate, honest, hard working dude. Besides, we know you two get along well.”

She could always rely on Ekko, and yet here she was, using him as some buffer to protect her sister from her own weird incestuous fixations. Christ, wasn't she a piece of work?

“Dude, I don't even know if I have a shot. That woman knows a little bit too much about Allison Bechdel and Leslie Feinburg for me to feel confident. Caitlyn told me yesterday they were out thrifting and Jinx said “I mean, I can like guys.”. What am I supposed to do with that?”

Vi sighed and shook her head again, pushing herself up to stand and pat Ekko on the shoulder.

“You two are awful loud, you know that?” Jinx asked from the place where the wood patterned vinyl of the living room floor met the shoddy beige-but-once-white vinyl of the kitchen. Ekko startled in his seat.

“S-shit, how much of that did you hear?”

“Enough to know you really need to work on your impression of me, loverman.” Jinx flashed a smile as Ekko’s cheeks flushed, maybe it was real, maybe it wasn't. Vi couldn't bear to look her sister in the eyes to try and figure out. “Did you steal one of my drinks?”

“Yeah, sorry, I'll replace it.” Jinx was wearing Vi’s shirt and a pair of pink pajama pants. It was the most clothing Vi'd seen her wear since she walked in on her birthday. Vi lit another smoke.

“Don't worry about it.” Jinx was trying to look at her. “Are you okay? Tell me the truth.”

Lying, Vi forced a chuckle out. “I am. I'm doing alright. Hangover is a bitch, but I guess that's what I get for blacking out. I can't remember anything after the little scuffle with that perv. Hope I didn't act like too much of an ass. If I did…” Vi sighed out a dark cloud from her smoke, their piece of shit smoke detector not making a peep. “I'm sorry. Really, I am. I'll be sure it doesn't happen again.”

“Oh…” Jinx was quiet as Vi turned her back on her, grabbing at the freezer for a hot pocket.

“I uh, I gotta go get ready for work.” Vi said, throwing the hot pocket in the microwave.

“Your rotation doesn't start until tomorrow.” Jinx pointed out.

“Loris called in sick. They need me to cover.” Vi lied. “Besides, I think you and Loverman here have something to talk about.”

“I hate you both so, so fucking much.” Ekko groaned.

“Vi…” Jinx asked, something quiet and desperate underlining her voice. It stopped Vi dead in the entryway to the hall. “Are you sure you're okay?”

“Of course.” Vi said over her shoulder. She couldn't look her in the eyes. Not now. If she did she'd crack, relapse into bad judgement, wrongs left unrighted, amends unmade and her with them. “I think you two would make a cute couple.”

That wasn't the question Jinx was asking, Vi knew that. But in her guilty, penitent mind it was the answer that was needed. She walked away to shower, a thought crossing her mind as she looked at her phone in the bathroom. She typed out a quick text to Jayce. By the time she was done showering, she had her reply.

VioletDollanganger: Hey Jayce, you still boxing? I'm getting a little flabby.
MajorLeagueJayceball: Yeah I am! Got a good new gym here in town. I could get you a spot. What's your schedule like?

Vi typed out her reply, tracking the conversation as she got ready. First step, she gave herself her own damn T shot like a grown ass butch.

VioletDollanganger: Wide open. Get me as much gym time as you can as long as it doesn't fuck with my work schedule.
MajorLeagueJayceball: Damn, going hard for it! Sounds good to me, man. I'll join in with you. Always trained better with you around. Plus Mel has been trying to get me out of the lab more.

She sighed to herself as she finished throwing on her work overalls. She didn't actually need to go in, but in all likelihood someone would probably take her up on her taking over the rest of their shift. She just needed to get the fuck out of this apartment, away from Ekko and Jinx long enough for them to work things out, away from the bedspread that still smelled like apple pie, away from everything.

She had apologized, in the only way she could manage to. She couldn't fully confess, because if she did that would mean having to confess to more than two years of perversion that she'd rather gouge out her fucking eyes than own up to. Now all she had to do was ensure it never happened again.

She'd keep busy, hope that Ekko and the tattoo shop could keep Jinx busy as well, and things would get better. She would get better. She would figure out a way to remake herself into a normal fucking person, with a normal relationship with her sister, and everything would work out.

She lit another smoke there in her bedroom, hurrying out the door and out of the apartment.

Chapter Text

Chapter 5 - Invisible / Daylilly

Jayce pulled Vi aside a month after the concert.

They were at the boxing gym. Vi had just gotten off of work and still had so much oil stuck in her undercut that it looked damn near black. Vi was working the heavy bag for everything she was worthin a pair of blue shorts. They were the only clean ones she had left. Laundry was hard to do when you were avoiding your roommate.

Her wrists ached, her arms screamed, and for a short, blissful moment she was free from her own skull. She smashed her fist into the side of the bag with a few jabs and a right hook as her music pounded in her ears.

She was losing steam, and desperately wanted to keep herself in that blissful rush. She searched for motivation, something to piss her off. She thought of every son of a birch she'd ever wanted to hit, every person who had ever fucked her over, everyone who had ruined her life and destroyed her chance at being a normal person.

She smashed a devastating cross into the bag, almost able to feel Miss Gracy’s boney nose crack under her glove. Another jab-jab-hook, and she sent Marcus sprawling onto the ground, minus a few teeth. Jab, cross, jab, uppercut, and that burley, henchmen-looking motherfucker that stole Powder from her was crying for his mother.

“Vi-”

Jab, right hook, left uppercut, cross, and Ambessa’s skull was cracking against the hood of that pretty car she used to haul Powder away.

“Vi-”

But who was left? She couldn't punch a foster care system that was never meant to take care of kids. She couldn't brutalize an adoption system that treated poor kids like pets to be bought by the wealthy. She couldn't hurt a system that discarded the fathers she could have had cus of the crimes of desperation and poverty, because they were different,

So it was her turn, it was Vi’s face on the bag. Jab, right hook, left hook, right uppercut sent her to the floor. cross, cross, cross, broke her teeth, broke her jaw, smashed her occipital bone on one side, cross, cross, cross broke the occipital on the other. Cross, cross, cross broke every part of her that couldn't let go of the sick perversion she had become. Cross, cross, cross and her eyes leaked out of their shattered sockets as she-

“Vi!” Jayce hollered, grabbing the headphones off her dome.

“WHAT!” She barked back, snatching the music out of his hands. He startled at that, and the look of hurt in his eyes snapped Vi to some form of sense. “S-shit, sorry man. I was uh… I was in the zone. I’m sorry.” She swallowed and reached for the energy drink next to her unopened water bottle.

“It’s all good. I get it.” He tried to assure, but it was clear how shaken he still was. “The uh, the owner said they gotta close early tonight. We gotta shower and go.”

“Ah, shit. Okay well, go ahead and wash up. I’m finishing this set then I'll shower at home.” It would make a good excuse to skip out on cooking with Jinx. It was a wonder that Jinx still kept asking after all the weeks of excuses.

One more thing Vi had to feel guilty about.

“C'mon, man. Why don't we head out together. I uh… I've been meaning to talk to you.”

“Aren't we doing that right now?” Vi asked, returning to her boxing stance in front of the bag. Before she could throw a punch, Jayce grabbed her wrist.

“A serious talk, man.”

Vi sighed and undid her gloves.

“Then talk. Not like anyone else is here to hear us.” aside from the old man behind the front counter, i.e. the opposite side of the building, the gym was empty so late.

“I'm worried about you.”

“Why? I'm fine.” Vi said, chucking her gloves in her bag, and starting to undo her hand wraps. Blue.

“You're not, though, and you're terrible at hiding it. You’ve got eye bags under your eye bags. Worse than even in highschool. I'm worried about you.”

“Well fuckin don't be. I'm fine. I’ve ran on a lot less sleep before.”

“Yeah by downing so much caffeine that your heart damn near explodes.” He rested a hand on her shoulder. “Come on, Vi, I'm begging here, talk to me.” she didn't respond, focused on her hand wraps. “It's the nightmares, isn't it? They're back.”

She stopped halfway through her hand roll, looking at her workout shoes. She sighed and shook her head. “Yeah, yeah they are.” He gave a half smile at the progress.

“Okay, see now we know the problem, so we can fix it.” He said.

“Man, I've had these things since I was a kid. They’re not really something you can fix.”

“Have you tried talking to anyone about em?”

Considering how many of them centered around her bending her sister over? No. “Yeah, and it didn't help.”

“Well, it seemed like you were doing real well there for a few months. What helped then?”

Having Powder, but that wasn't an option anymore. She'd proven to herself that she couldn't be trusted around her sister.

“Nothing helps or hurts man, they come and they go. Shit’s like the tides.” Vi lied. Jayce chewed his cheek, clearly not believing her.

“Have you thought about maybe… cutting back on the drinking? Maybe that would help. Seems like things started getting bad around the time you were hitting the bottle hard again.” Vi rolled her eyes.

“Fuck off, Jayce. I'm not talking about this again.”

“Vi, I'm worried about you man. You're drinking a lot, even for you. It's… man it's fucking concerning. How many bottles are you going through a week? Fuck it, a day?”

“That's none of your fuckin business.”

“You're my best friend, of course it's my business, you stubborn prick!”

“I'm fine!” Vi snapped.

“You're not!”

“Then fuck it, I will be fine.” Vi said, chucking her arm wraps in her bag, turning her back to him and facing the massive wall length mirror. “This shit comes and goes man, a few weeks, you'll barely even remember this. Just fucking…” Vi sighed and shook her head. “Just let me deal, man. It'll pass. It's gotta.” Because what would it mean if it didn't?

Jayce looked at her through the mirror. He sighed and shook his head. “I'm sorry. I hope I'm not being a dick about all this. I can't imagine going through the shit you did as a kid. But I know what it was like when my dad died. I'd do just about anything not to sleep, cus whenever I would it would just be… him. Him all cold and stiff, staring at me… I'm not trying to be cruel, but I'm worried, and I don't know what to do to help and God you're so fucking stubborn all the fucking time...” He looked her in the eyes through the glass. “Man, just please promise me you'll know when to cut back, okay? Promise me I won't…” he shivered. “Promise me you aren't gonna go out like my old man.”

“Jayce…”

“Just promise me that, and I'll let it drop. I'll give you all the time you need, to brood and bitch and drink and smoke. We’ll just stay being buddies and training partners. Just give me your word that you'll know when to cut back, and that you'll come talk to me if you think you’ve reached that point.”

Vi looked at him in the mirror. “I promise.” She grabbed a jump rope off the wall. “I'm still gonna keep training.” Jayce sighed, but true to his word, he let her be.

It was April by the time Ekko finally confronted her. He’d been giving her those concerned looks for months, but he didn't say anything until then. There was a party and Jinx and VI's apartment, Vi couldn't be assed to remember what for.

She was sat back on the couch, three fingers of spiced whiskey in her hand, when he dropped down next to her.

“Hey man, can we talk?”

“Sure, gimme everything you got.”

“I was thinking maybe we talk outside.” Vi sighed, almost certain that she had an idea what this was going to be about.

“Shouldn't you be hanging with Jinx?” He gave her a strange look, chewing his cheek.

“I can’t find Powder anywhere. Figure she'll let me know when she wants to be found. You're the one I'm more worried about though.” She hauled herself up, muttering a “come on” as she walked toward the door.

By the time he had followed her out, she had a cigarette between her lips, lit with her old man’s lighter. They were on the ledge by the staircase, overlooking the parking lot of the apartment building as Vi leaned against the guard rail. “What’s up?” She asked around the cigarette.

“Dude, I'm worried.” Ekko said.

“So is fucking everyone these days.” Vi sighed out smoke. “Which doesn't make sense to me. I’m not drinking that much more than this time last year. But oh, Jinx shows up and I take a break for a few months, then all of a sudden I have a fuckin problem when I go back to normal. Such horse shit.” Vi lamented, taking another drag of her smoke as she finished doing some nasally impression of nobody, ice clinking in the glass in her hand.

“Vi, man, that's not what I'm talking about.”

“Then what?”

“Vi, did I do something wrong?” Ekko asked, and for the first time in months, Vi looked him in the eyes.

“What?”

“You barely fucking look at me man. We don't talk at all any more, aside from the most boring ass small talk and the second I talk about Powder you find some excuse to step away. “Oh I gotta smoke” “oh, need a refill”.” Ekko looked like dogshit. At some point he'd gotten his hair touched up into a set of short locks, they looked good on him, but the bags under his eyes were so awful he might as well be a Dollanganger. “Man, did I fuck up by asking Powder out? Is that what all this is? Did I fuck things up between you two?”

Vi groaned and dragged her hands through her hair, still oil-slicked and disheveled. “No man, that's got nothing to do with this.You asked me flat out if it was okay, I'm not mad at you.” Vi only partially lied. She wasn't mad at Ekko. She had practically thrown the two of them at each other and fled the room. “You're a good dude. You're my best friend, my brother. I’m…” just a degenerate who wants to fuck her own sister. “I’m not mad at you, Ek. I hope you know that.”

“Then what's up, man? Just talk to me.”

How the fuck could she talk to him about this, to anyone? If there was ever a line even brothers couldn't cross, “Hey man, I really want to have sex with your girlfriend. You know, my sister?” was it.

So, Vi made up her best, closest excuse. It was almost the truth.
“Promise me this stays between us? You can't even tell Jinx.”

“Of course.”

Vi sighed and looked back out into the distance. “It's not you, man. It's her. Every time I'm around, she's on your arm, or around you, and she's the one I can’t look at right now. The nightmares have been bad lately, and… she just reminds me too much of it all. I can't look at her without being reminded of all this awful shit, and I'm just hoping that it passes.”

It wasn't entirely a lie, she just left out exactly what the nightmares had turned into. Now instead of the fire, the orphanage, or Ambessa, it was them, back in that damned bathroom: Violet standing over top of a defiled Powder, who stared at her in terror, sobbing as she asked her over and over why, why, why. Now it was Powder, figuring out that she'd been the target of Vi’s fantasies for years, looking at her in disgust, running away from her and never coming back. Now it was Vi, old and alone by no one's hands but her own, dying in a hospital bed with no one there to mourn the sick degenerate she’d allowed herself to devolve into.

“Fuck, man, I'm so sorry.”

“Me too.” Vi knocked back the entirety of her glass, 2 and a half fingers of cinnamon whiskey burning its way down her throat and singing away the remnants of those nightmares for a few short seconds. “I uh, I think I'm gonna go get a refill. You good?”

“Yeah… thanks, man.” Ekko said, leaned up against the rail, worrying the palm of his hand with his thumb. Vi made her way to the door. “Hey, Vi…”

“Yeah?” She said, stopping with her hand on the knob.

“You know I love you, right?”

“... I love you too, Ek.”

Thinking of those days makes a bitter taste rise in Vi's throat as she lays there in her cot, staring at the dark ceiling of the hospital room. She closes her eyes and tries to let sleep overtake her, but without liquor or Powder, sleep has always been hard to find.

She isn't the only one who finds trouble sleeping. She never was. Part of what had made her and Caitlyn so compatible in their youth was the way they could waste away the hours in the late night together.

Across the city, Caitlyn stares up at the ceiling of her home, and by utter coincidence finds herself reflecting on that same party.

Caitlyn, unsurprisingly, couldn't find Violet anywhere. The apartment was shockingly small, considering how often the butch seemed to disappear in it.

More often than not, Cait didn't go chasing after her. She’d figured out very early in their relationship that Violet was very like a cat, when she needed space, she took it, and it very rarely helped to intrude on it. But, for all her faults, Caitlyn wasn't blind. Vi had been spiraling for months, far longer and far worse than any of the depressive episodes she’d had before. It was also very out of season.

The normal spiral struck in October, and ended in the weeks after her birthday. She’d smoke more, drink more, sleep less if at all, and live off of black coffee, menthols and frozen meals. But eventually she would pull out of the funk, and they'd go back to how life had been.

It was never ideal, but Caitlyn had seen in her own parents' marriage exactly how useless it was trying to “fix” someone's depression. Every summer, her father would fall into his own “funk”, and she’d have to spend those months watching her mother berate and accost him for not doing more to spend time with her while she was home from school. That tradition started in her youth at boarding schools, and continued well into her college career. Caitlyn Kirraman would be many things, but she would be damned if she turned into her mother.

But things were different now. It was the late weeks of spring and Vi was downing those sickeningly sweet energy drinks like cardiac arrhythmias were a myth, and whiskey like liver disease was propaganda. Even for Cait’s understanding, she was getting more and more worried and nothing she did seemed to help.

It felt like the time she spent with Vi was split into three phases. In the mornings they'd talk almost like normal, save for Vi being so clearly distracted by thoughts that made her worry her thumb in her palm, smoke, or dig her own nails into her skin.

Then in the evenings Vi would imbibe her poisons and they'd talk a little bit easier, even if Vi’s eyes never quite seemed to focus on Caitlyn.

Then late at night, things would go one of two ways: Violet either making some excuse for why she needed to be alone, or pressing Caitlyn face down into her mattress until the two of them collapsed. The second option were some of the only nights Caitlyn ever saw Vi fall asleep before 4 or 5 in the morning. But those were becoming fewer and farther between, both because Vi would ask for her alone time more, and because Caitlyn was becoming more and more bothered by the way everything in that room reeked of smoke.

Caitlyn felt guilty for not being around more, but there was only so much she could take. Vi needed her space, Caitlyn understood that, even if it left her feeling woefully incapable of helping the one person she desperately wanted to.

She just prayed she'd get some time with Vi in a better state before she had to leave for her parent’s again that summer.

Caitlyn stepped out of the empty bedroom and heard a whimper from the bathroom. She saw the door cracked open, light pouring out into the dim hallway, and set a gentle knock against the wood.

“Y-yeah?” Jinx asked from the other side.

“Jinx? It's me.” Caitlyn said, stepping in to see Jinx sat on top of the closed toilet lid, wiping tears and mascara off her cheek with the palm of her hand. She was in a pair of pink shorts and a black halter top. She had taken one of Vi’s old leather jackets and covered it in pink and blue leather paint with fun little designs, including the white and blue clouds Caitlyn recognized from Vi’s keepsake box. Caitlyn had always liked Jinx’s clothing projects, even if most of them started with stealing Vi’s clothes. Jinx was such a creative girl, even more so since she’d started her apprenticeship.

Jinx’s face soured the moment she laid eyes on Caitlyn. “What do you want?” She sneered, as if Caitlyn was intruding into her space alongside some other perceived sleight Caitlyn didn't understand. Her words slurred together, shame and guilt replacing the disgust on her face as tears welled up in her eyes again.

“I heard you crying. I wanted to check on you, make sure you were okay… Did I do something wrong?” Caitlyn asked, inching her way into the bathroom. Jinx wiped more tears away, looking down at the floor.

“N-no. I’m sorry, Caity-kat, it's not your fault.”

“What isn’t?” Cait asked, closing the door behind her as she saw Jinx grab a glass off the floor, three fingers of cinnamon whiskey over ice clicking around before she downed a gulp. Her face puckered at the burn of it.

“Nothing, I’m just… not feeling good. Please, just drop it.”

“I've been hearing that an awful lot from you and your sister lately, you know that?” Caitlyn asked, stepping closer. The mention of Vi made Jinx flinch. “Talk to me, Jinx. What's the matter? I feel like I never see you anymore.”

“What are you talking about? We never escape each other. You're here all the time.”

“Yes, but you aren't. You spend an awful lot of time over at Ekko’s, you don't answer any of my texts, we haven't gone shopping in months.”

“I’ve been busy.” Jinx grumbled, taking another sip of whiskey, face puckering yet again. She stared into the cup longingly, wiping another tear. “It doesn't taste right.” Caitlyn furrowed her brow.

“Did someone put something in your drink?”

“No, god no, that's not what I meant.” Jinx shook her head and groaned. “Please just leave me alone, Cait. I can't talk about this right now. Least of all with you.”

Caitlyn must have worn her hurt plainly, because guilt painted itself on Jinx’s face in an instant.

“Jinx, whatever I've done, I'm sorry.”

“You didn't do anything!” Jinx snapped, chucking the glass into the corner. Miraculously, it didn't shatter, but the drink went everywhere as Jinx curled into herself, grasping at the leather of the jacket, pulling it tight around her like it would shield her from the world. “It's me, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I've completely ruined everything, and I have no idea how to fix it. I had so many ideas of what life would be like when I finally got here, and I fucking ruined it all because I couldn't stop being that dumb little girl that believed in knights and princesses and happily ever afters.” She sobbed into her hands.

Caitlyn knealt down and reached her hand out. Jinx flinched away from it on instinct, but Caitlyn kept going, and took Jinx’s hand in hers. “Jinx, whatever's going on, we can figure it out. I miss you, but I can't help you if you won't talk to me.”

“I miss you too. But you have no idea what you're asking.” Jinx choked out.

“I think I'm more understanding than you expect.” Caitlyn offered, only to be greeted by a cold, bitter laugh.

“Not about something like this.” Caitlyn just stayed there, Jinx’s hand in hers, and tried to give something like a reassuring smile. The quiet dragged on, and Jinx seemed to break like a dam. “Vi won't even look at me anymore. I broke her, I destroyed her and everything we'd made for ourselves since I showed up. She hasn't looked me in the eye since the concert… y-yknow since the fight.” She added hastily.

“Have you talked to her?”

“Of course! But she won't say more than a few words before fucking off to smoke or with some excuse about needing to go to work on her truck. I.. I think she hates me.”

“Jinx, she could never hate you.”

“You don't know that! Everyone always says family is forever, but it's all a crock of shit! Family is a fickle, backstabbing nightmare, and I'm so tired of feeling like I'm the broken fucking freak in every family I'm part of.”

“Jinx, you are not broken, and your family is not fickle. I know your home wasn't a loving one, but that's not what family is. Violet loves you, she always has and she always will, she's never been capable of anything else. Ekko adores you, and if he doesn't count as family to you two I don't know who ever could.” Caitlyn brushed some of the hair out of Jinx’s face and smiled up at her. “I'd like to think I'd be counted amongst your family as well. I know I'm not your sister, but maybe someday I could be.” She offered with a squeeze of her hand. Hope, realization, anger, guilt and tears found their way back into Jinx’s face in a strange, bitter cocktail. “And I know that I care about you, and I don't think you're a freak. I think you're someone who has been through so much, and that those wounds take time to heal. Have you been talking to anyone?”

“Y-yeah. Vi got me set up with insurance and stuff… I’ve been seeing this therapist who put me on meds that actually help. They help the nightmares and stuff…”

“That’s great!” Caitlyn praised, squeezing Jinx’s hand again, receiving a tiny squeeze in return.

“It's not enough. It's not like…” she stopped, and the tears poured down, the sobbing renewed.

Cait sat with her for quite some time, the two just sitting there in the silence. Jinx didn't try to pull her hand away. She sat there, hand in hand, and stared at Cait with that same shifting kaleidoscope of emotions for what felt like hours. Affection, anger, grief and shame, wrath and desperation all revealed with drunken honesty that couldn't extend to her words.

“You’d’ve made a good sister, in a better world.” Jinx finally said, running her thumb over the pristine skin of Caitlyn’s knuckles.

“I can be a good one here, too.” Caitlyn offered, squeezing Jinx’s hand. Jinx squeezed back, chewing her cheek as she stared at their interlocked fingers, dark blue, pink, and light blue nails mingling amongst each other.

Jinx didn't believe her. It was written plain as day across her face. But the fact that she wanted so badly to believe her was written just as obviously. “I don't think it works like that. I don't think things work out very well at all for me. I'm just a wrecking ball shaped like a person. I'm just a jinx.”

“That's not true.”

“It is! I ruined everything. I ruined our childhood, I ruined her life by being away, now I’ve ruined her by being here… I think the worst part is I’m not even sorry for what happened. I’m sorry for hurting her, but… I don't regret what I did. I know I should, but I've never done what I should, never thought how I should, never felt how I should…” she looked back up to Caitlyn and remembered who she was talking to, swallowing down words unsaid.

“Jinx, the fight wasn't your fault, getting taken wasn't your fault. Vi doesn't blame you for any of that.” Jinx gave her a look, and Caitlyn couldn't help but feel like a child talking about things she didn't understand.

“I know. I was lucky, she forgot even if it seems like she couldn't forgive. I thought it'd all work out anyway, that I could force it all to work out by sheer power of will. Now I'm just left here in the wreckage of my own creation, lacking even the good conscience of feeling bad about it. I don't, and I don't care that I should. I feel bad that I hurt her, that I could hurt you, but I can't bother with all the other shit. If that makes me a monster, fine, fuck it, I'm the monster in this story then, not the princess.”

Caitlyn remembers being so confused at the time, writing it all off as drunken babbling. Would anything have changed if she'd put together what Jinx was saying? How could she?

“You're not a monster, Jinx.” Caitlyn said, squeezing her hand again. “I know you think everything is ruined, but Vi is just in a bad place. Give it time, but don't give up on her. Things will work their way out, all we can do is be there for her when they do.” Jinx gave her such a sad smile, squeezing her hand back. She crawled down from the seat, plopping onto the floor beside Caitlyn and resting against the woman, the two leaning against a cabinet.

“You're a sweetheart, Caity-kat, you know that?”

“I try.”

“...I’d really like for you to be my sister.” She sniffled, linking her arm with Caitlyn’s. “But I don't feel like I'm that lucky. I'm sorry, Caity-kat. I really am.”

“I think you'd be surprised if you gave me a chance. You have nothing to be sorry for, dear. I'm sorry life hasn't been kinder.”

By the time Mel walked in to find them, still there in the quiet together, she said they'd been gone for nearly an hour. They returned to the party, Jinx not quite bubbly as she used to be, but a smile on her face all the same, just as Vi and Ekko walked back into the living room, the end of a cigarette still burning between Vi’s fingers. Jinx looked at her expectantly, as Vi breathed the last of the cigarette smoke out of her lungs, the cloud of smoke drifting in front of her eyes as they dropped to the floor. Jinx’s smile disappeared with the smoke.

Caitlyn stares at the ceiling, no closer to sleep than she had been, but several fresh tears gracing her cheeks.

Several weeks later, Vi hauled herself out of bed a few minutes before her morning alarm was set to go off. She had been awake for the better part of an hour anyway, so what the fuck did it matter?

She searched through the pile of clothes in the corner of her room, digging up the jumpsuit with the fewest oil stains. It reeked of smoke, which was saying something seeing as basically the entire room did as well. But Vi figured it was good enough for her. She found a pair of clean boxers and threw them on, along with the first tank top she could find. It could be charitably called usable.

She walked out into the hallway, hearing the shower running. The bathroom door was closed as Vi walked past on her way to the kitchen. She had half an hour before she and Jinx needed to leave, if they wanted to get to their jobs on time. She set about rallying up something to eat.

“We need to make a stop after work.” Jinx said from the entrance to the kitchen.

Vi stood at the stove, facing the wall, stuffing some half cooked frozen dinner into her mouth. She mumbled over her shoulder “Can’t you just go after we get home? Have Ekko take you.”

“He can't. He's getting ready to leave tomorrow.” Vi dragged her hand down her face as she realized she'd completely spaced. He was leaving for the summer. Was it really already that late in the year? “I don't see why you can't just help me. It's a supply run for his party.” Vi sighed and shook her head. She felt like a dick, Ekko getting ready to leave for months while there she was, being a petty asshole.

“I’m sorry, you're right. Just take the truck. I'll walk home from work today.”

“That's like an hour walk.”

“I need the cardio. Besides, the fresh air will do me good.”

“Or you could just ride with me like a normal person and help me carry the supplies.” Jinx offered prodingly. Vi’s response consisted of taking a swig off the candy flavored energy drink she had taken from her shelf in the fridge. “Can you please actually look at me? I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall here.”

Vi sighed and turned around. “I'm trying to eat.” She grunted out, eyes settling on Jinx’s outfit. Vi didn't know how she had gotten the blood out of her old tie dye shirt, but however she had it became an even more frequent part of her outfit rotation than it had when she first got it.

The crop top did wonders to display the vibrant ink Jinx had adorned herself with in the 3 months she had been working at the studio. She'd chopped it up more since the concert, cutting the collar off, giving it an off the shoulder look that felt like Jinx demanding Vi be reminded of her sins. Her body had been painted over with fluffy blue and white clouds, just like the ones painted on their mom's old keepsake box. It suited her, Vi had to admit, but the placement felt like some sick joke with Vi being the punchline.

Vi could see a blue cloud adorning Jinx’s neck. A little bit lower, her left shoulder had one listing up lazily from her back. Vi knew that there was a whole trail of them drifting down and across her back, ending at the final cloud on her opposite hip.

Neck, shoulder, hip.

Neck, shoulder, hip.

Shame, shame, shame.

Her fingernails were all pink now. They matched her shorts.

“Are you going to say anything?” Jinx asked, arms crossed in front of her, sneaker clad foot tapping.

“I said my piece. Take the truck, grab whatever we need and I'll walk. I should get home around the same time you do unless you sprint through the grocery store. I'll help from there.”

“You know Ekko better than anyone. I need help picking out stuff he’ll like.”

“He's your boyfriend.” Vi shot back.

“He's your brother.” That was a glass of ice water down her spine if she'd ever had one.

Ekko deserved better than her being a bitch just because she didn't want to be alone with her sister.

“He likes nachos. I'll send you a list of supplies, the good stuff, the brands he likes. He likes it with the shitty cheese spread, don't make it too fancy with trying to melt shredded cheese or nothin like that. But he does like fresh jalapenos, the canned ones make him gag.” Vi said, grabbing for her phone. “He also likes empanadas. There's a good place, Argentinian, that's got a lot of good options. We haven't gone since me and Cait got together. If you talk to them, they'll probably let you set up some kind of catering order to pick up. I'll send you his favorites.” Vi sighed to herself, pinching the bridge of her nose. ‘I guess that probably would be easier for me to put together, since they know me… if you grab the groceries, we can get the empanadas together, and I can cook the nachos.” Vi could justify that to herself. It kept the time alone to a minimum, but didn't make her feel like an asshole. She had enough of that feeling to last a lifetime.

Jinx sighed as well, seemingly resigned to having to accept that. “Fine… thank you.”

“No problem.” Vi lied. “Can I please go back to eating my breakfast?”

“Sure, do whatever.” Jinx sighed. Vi returned to facing the wall, but she could feel Jinx’s eyes weighing heavy on her back.

Vi took a drink from her can. The sugar-free synthetic sweetness tasted bitter on her tongue, or maybe that was just her.

She finished her food as Jinx grabbed for some frozen burrito and threw it into her bag. “Let's go.” Was all she said before making her way to the door. Vi followed after, hopping into the bed of the truck as Jinx got behind the wheel. Jinx didn't bother giving her shit for it anymore. She hadn’t for months now.

Vi took her lunch break in the back lot of the shop. She had her back against the wheel of some junker that they were being paid to keep alive a few weeks longer. She had a bologna and cheese sandwich in her grease smeared hands, cleaning them off prior to eating hadn’t crossed her mind. She wasn’t even really tasting the food, it was just to keep herself from getting the migraines that came whenever she caffeinated but didn’t eat. She took another bite of sandwich and sipped from a can of skittles flavored battery acid, it was her favorite one.

Loris settled beside her on the ground, grabbing out a monster of a sandwich from a metal pail.

“I'm joining you.” He grumbled, taking a bite from his sub.

“Man, I really don't feel like it right now.” Vi replied, taking another sip.

“You never do.” He replied after swallowing his bite.

“I don't fucking need this today, dude.”

“Tough shit.” Vi shook her head.

Loris was the only friend who hadn't tried to pull this ‘are you doing okay? We're worried about you’ shit with her in the last few months. He'd always been good about respecting her privacy, not sticking his nose in her business.

But he didn't say anything. He just sat there, eating his sub, so she didn’t push back much harder than that.

Vi tried to take a bite of her sandwich, but it was aggressively unappetizing. She tossed it back onto the paper bag she had brought it out in. She sipped her over caffeinated syrup, and figured she'd just let them sit there in silence.

He took another bite of his sandwich, then another, then another. He grabbed one of those tall, glass-bottled colas from his lunch pail, searching around for a second before letting out a quiet grumble of exasperation. No bottle key, it seemed.

Vi sighed, offering her hand. He handed it over, and Vi popped it off with the edge of her carabiner, handing it back to him. He grabbed it, looking at the bottle for a second before offering it to her. Vi looked at him with a raised brow, and he insistently re-extends his hand out.

Vi took a drink from the bottle. She tasted caramel, citrus and cane sugar. Then she handed it back, and Loris took a long pull off of it before returning to his sandwich.

“What's up, man?” Vi finally asked.

“The guys worry about you.” He replied simply. “They think you’re drinking on the job.”

“That's bullshit, man. I'll do a breathalyzer.”

“I know that. They don't.” Loris took another bite, finishing off one half of the sandwich and polishing off the last of his cola. He dusted his hands off, grabbing a second bottle out of his pail and offering it to Vi. She popped the top off again, snaking a long drag off the top this time. “Your clothes reek of smoke and liquor. Your eye bags are bigger than your eyes. You look worse now than you did on your first day here.”

“I looked good my first day!” Vi shot back.

“You looked like a corpse that was too stubborn to die. Always have.” He paused for a moment. She looked at her reflection on the glass bottle. Her hair was a mess, so much oil in it from her hands running through it that it practically looked black. Her undercut had grown out into a shaggy mess, and her longer hair at the top had grown out so much that if it weren't for the oil it’d fall to the sides in the douchiest fuckboy middle part. Looking at her own eyes in the reflection made Vi realize just how apt that corpse metaphor was. She looked gaunt, eyes sunken in and bloodshot. “Almost.” he added before taking the bottle back and sipping it.

“Almost what?”

He grumbled at her. He hated having to elaborate. “You almost always have. Looked like shit, I mean.”

Vi propped her arms on her knees, leaned against the car as she fiddled with her fingers. “When didn't I?”

She knew the answer.

“For about two months, at the start of the year. You were good then. Well rested, well fed, and you didn't house two packs in a lunch break.” He points to the discarded boxes laying at Vi’s feet. Even she was ashamed of that.

“I'm just… I'm just going through something right now, man.”

“No shit.” Loris stuffed the other half of his sub into her hands, still wrapped in the paper from the shop. “Eat. It's good. It'll taste much better now, without ash in your mouth.”

Vi sighed and took a bite.

She hated to admit it, but it was a really fucking good sandwhich.

He pulled out a third bottle of cola, grabbing a bottle key from his pocket, popping it, stealing a sip then holding it out to her. She looked at him, confused.

“What the fuck is this?”

“It's a soda. You drink it.” She chuckled. She actually chuckled.

“What the fuck are you pulling, Loris?” He smiled back at her.

“Right now? A friend's head out of her ass.” He offered her a tired smile and the bottle of soda again.

She took another bite from the sandwich and grabbed the soda from him. She sipped it, washing it all down.

“Do you wanna tell me what's going on with you?” Loris asked. She sighed and leaned her head back. Loris was a good dude, but he knew Vi the least out of most of her friends.

Maybe that was a good thing. He had fewer pieces he could put together, fewer chances to figure out what the fuck was wrong with her. She didn’t need to be as vague.

“I don't really think I can, man. I'm in deep shit, and feel like I'm just swimming deeper into it.” Vi sighed, taking another bite, washing it down. Loris didn't say anything, just sat there, patient. “I fucked up a few months back, bad. Really bad. And I'm trying to make up for my mistakes, trying to be better, but it feels like something is wrong with me. Like I'm just cursed. Like god is sitting there laughing at me." Loris nodded.

“Can I be real with you, kid?”

“Don't call me that. I'm 25.” Loris chuckled.

“I was about your age when you were born, kid.” He shot back. “Listen, I don't have some magical insight that will make it all better. But I have seen my fair share of men running from something. You don’t strike me as the type to run from a fight, and you’re of no use to anyone like this. Not me, not your friends, not your wifey or your sister. So quit fuckin running.” Vi sighed and nodded.

“Thanks, man.”

“Don't mention it.” Loris slid the bottle key back into his pocket. “It’s your friday. Come in with some clean clothes next week, and get some sleep. I'll keep management off your ass.” Vi nodded, taking the last bite of her sandwich, polishing off the last of the cola. They sat there for another few minutes, before curiosity finally overtook her.

“... What the fuck was up with that bottle shit?” Loris shrugged.

“Everyone wants to feel needed.”

Vi hoofed it home at the end of her shift, stuck confronting the worst part of a self destructive spiral: Coming out of it and realizing how fucking stupid she'd been acting up to that point.

She felt that ungodly self loathing strike to her core as she cursed herself for being too stubborn to just accept the damn ride and be around her sister. It wouldn't even have been time with them alone, they would have been in a public shop.

She could’ve texted Jinx and asked for a ride, but Vi was still too proud for that.

“Vi?” She was startled from her thoughts by a voice suddenly beside her. Mel, still in her car with the passenger side window down, was pulled over on the side of the road beside Vi.

“Christ, Mel, scared the shit out of me.”

“I honked at you. Are you okay?”

“I uh, I kinda acted like an idiot and now I'm walking home from work.”

“You’re aware that it's supposed to rain in the next half hour, right?” Mel asked.

Vi did not know that.

“Would you like a ride? I can drop you a few blocks from your place.”

Vi threw her work bag in the trunk and hopped in the front. There was a stack of books on the seat, Vi set them on her lap.

“Sorry, you're just catching me coming back from the library.”

“Not a problem. Thank you for stopping.”

“Of course, dear. I recognized the hair but thought I might be seeing things.”

“Lil too much time with Jayce can drive anyone crazy. I know first hand.” Vi offered with a chuckle.

“Now that you mention it, I recall him saying something similar about you.” Mel responded in kind.

“Huh, makes sense he'd talk about me with you, seeing as you're all he talks about around me.”

“Well, look at you being a good friend.” Mel chuckled, almost seeming surprised.

“It's true, the guy never shuts up about you, or Vik. Pretty sure his next big engineering project is just gonna be a big neon sign that says “please ask me about my two favorite people”.” Mel chuckled but Vi could swear she saw a blush.

“Haven't you heard? He transferred out of engineering.”

“He what? Viktor is gonna be pissed.”

“No no, Viktor supported him completely. Viktor has been… coming to terms with some things as of late, and I think he sees that Jayce may be able to do more good in the public sphere than stuck in some lab.”

“God… when did all that happen? He never said a word to me about this.” Mel looked at her, concerned.

“Jayce has tried to talk to you about it quite a bit, Violet. You haven't exactly been the most conversational these past few months.” Vi knew she was probably right.

“Yeah, I know… I'm trying to get my shit together.”

“Good. Because as much as I know Jayce, Powder, and Caitlyn just adore you, and I do enjoy your company, I could only handle so much more of that damned brooding.”

“That bad?” Mel nodded.

“Viktor called you a “mopey self-interested cunt”.”

“Ouch…” Vi looked down at the lap full of books she had, and her eyes caught on something. “The Three Theban plays…” Vi read out on the top cover. Mel looked embarrassed.

“Ah, yes, don't mind that. Its-”

“The myths of Oedipus and Antigone. Yeah, I know it.” Vi muttered, flipping through the book. Mel seemed genuinely shocked. “You're a poli sci major, well I mean you're poly-a-lot-of-things but like… why would you need to read Oedipus?” Vi asked, looking over to her.

“It's not for me. Viktor asked for it. Didn't give much explanation. I haven't read it since my first year of school. How do you know that play?”

“I read it for a school project in high school. Jayce chose the Great Gatsby.”

“I see… What was your project about?”

“I argued that Oedipus trying to be a good person is what damned him.” Vi said, rifling through the book in search of something as she kept rambling. “Oedipus did everything he could to be a good, honest man and not some incestuous mother-fucker. He found out about the prophecy made for him and tried to escape it, tried to do the right thing. But because his parents sent him away, he was doomed to do everything he wanted to avoid. Also that Freud was a bitch.”

She found the quote she had been searching for. “Oh again, the misery, all at once, over and over the stabbing dagger, stab of memory raking me insane.” She recited, moving the cigarette from behind her ear to her mouth. It was the man of the hour, after having blinded himself. Vi chewed her cheek, fatigue had the better of her and a tired huff escaped her lips as she set the book down on her lap. “Do you think Oedipus still loved his wife as he blinded himself?” She asked Mel.

Mel looked at her, and Vi knew she had said too much.

“Sorry, I get a little loopy when I’m tired. Haven’t had enough caffeine.” She tried to justify.

“Not at all. I must admit, I don't have an answer.” Mel looked at Vi for a long moment at a stop light, and cracked a small smile. “In matters where I have no knowledge, I hold my tongue.” She recited from memory. “Maybe that's a lesson you could learn.” Vi chuckled at the taunting.

“It's but sorrow to be wise when wisdom profits not.”

And it's the pain we inflict on ourselves that hurt most of all.

“Ah I see, so that’s your justification.” Mel teased with a laugh. “I’ve never seen this side of you, Violet.”

Mel had only really become part of Vi’s life through Jayce, and she tended to get along much better with Cait and Jinx than Vi. Vi always worried she came across too vulgar and barbaric for her best friend’s partner’s taste.

She was glad to see that she could actually manage to impress her.

“Yeah well, folks get real weird when you bring up Oedipus at the function.”

“Personal experience?”

“No, thankfully I was never that dumb. Close, though.” Mel chuckled again, and the two settled into a strangely comfortable silence. Vi reached for her phone, typing out a quick message.

VioletDollanganger: I’m sorry. I've been an ass lately. I'm on my way home now, I'll help with whatever I can for tonight.

She received a text back seconds later.

PowderGanger: Good. I was waiting for you to get home so we can go grocery shopping anyway.

Vi smiled at her phone, then she looked up and smiled at Mel.

Maybe she could be normal after all.

VioletDollanganger:Hey man, happy birthday. Excited for your party tonight. Wanted to say I'm sorry for being such a dick lately.
EKKOEkkoekko: Thanks, Vi. I knew it was nothing personal. I've seen you in a funk before. I was just worried. Can't wait for the party!! Better be sending me off right.
EKKOEkkoekko: love you, Vi. Hope you never doubt that.
VioletDollanganger: Never, brother. Hope you always know the same.
EKKOEkkoekko: <3

MajorLeagueJayceball: Dude Mel said she found you on the side of the road???
VioletDollanganger: Yeah man, she's a saint. I pulled some dumb shit and was too stubborn to ask Jinx for a ride.
MajorLeagueJayceball: Lol, well at least you're honest about it.
VioletDollanganger: listen, I know I've been a bag of dicks lately. Thanks for sticking around with me for it.
MajorLeagueJayceball: Of course. I knew you'd pull through eventually. You know I’ve always got your back, man.
VioletDollanganger: Thank you. I think I'm gonna skip boxing tomorrow.
MajorLeagueJayceball: Sounds good. Rest up, brother.

Mel dropped Vi off on the corner a few blocks from her apartment building.

“Thank you.” Vi said, half out of the car. “Please tell Viktor I’ll work on the “mopey cunt” issue.” Mel rolled her eyes.

“Take care, Vi. I'll see you at the party. Ciao.”

Vi closed the car door and hoofed it to her home. The sun was hitting her back hard, so she undid the top of her overalls, tying the empty sleeves around her waist, letting the breeze hit her tank-top-clad back.

She walked into the apartment a few minutes later, dropping her work bag on the ground by the door. Jinx was laid out on the couch, legs crossed and clad in tight blue jeans she'd thrifted some time ago, pink designs paint-penned into the fabric. She had one of Vi’s old fucked up choring shirts on, one covered in a few dozen different stains and bleach spots that Vi would wear when doing dirty work around the house. She hadn't cut this one into a crop for some reason, instead it was tucked modestly into the jeans.

Vi finally looked up and met Jinx’s eyes for the first time in months. Her eyes were absolutely brilliant. There was a shimmer to them that made Vi worry for a moment that she was about to cry.

“Pink contacts?” Vi asked, assuming that her sister's eyes hadn’t magically changed colors while she wasn't looking.

“Y-yeah.” Jinx replied, tucking a hair behind her ear. Her hair’d gotten so long, and was pulled back into a sloppy ponytail that Vi would've bet had more hair escaping from it than in it. “I uh, I started wearing them months ago. We sell em at my shop, so you know… thought it would be fun.”

Vi smiled at her little sister for the first time in a lifetime.

“You look beautiful.”

That was something she could say. That was a sisterly thing to say. She could be okay, be normal, and not be a bitch.

Jinx rolled her eyes, but Vi swore she could see red in her pale cheeks. Vi felt an old urge tick away, and her hand reached for her smokes. She managed to pause her hand on her pocket.

“Don't worry. I'm getting changed before the party. Ekko is getting done with work late, so we have some time before people show up.” Jinx crawled off the couch. “Ready to go?”

“Shouldn't I shower first?” Vi still had oil slicked through her hair from work.

“We’ll have time after! I want to get the empanadas figured out ASAP so we have time to panic if it doesn't work.” Jinx said, grabbing Vi’s keys off the hook by the door. She bent down to slide her boots on, and Vi swallowed down that cigarette craving again.

“Fine, just a second.” Vi stepped into her bedroom, door hinges screaming, and grabbed the watch off her bedside table. She fastened it in place as she stepped back out. “If we get thrown out because I look like a bad Ellen Ripley cosplay, it's all your fault.”

“Oh whatever. You look hot.” Jinx waved her off, still fastening her boots and mercifully ignorant to Vi’s awkward reaction to the compliment. When she stood back up, she looked to Vi, then to her wrist, then back up with a gleeful little smile.

“Ready to go?” Vi asked.

Jinx nodded, and Vi followed her out the door, crawling into the passenger seat of her truck. The interior smelled like apple pie, mint and tobacco. Vi breathed it in. They stopped at a red light and Vi looked over to Jinx, who was already looking at her. Jinx smiled at her again, and Vi smiled back.

45 minutes to her next smoke. She could make it. She could be normal. They could be normal. This could be normal.

Vi closed the door to the truck, and stuck her hands in the pockets of her overalls. The groceries for the nachos, as well as drinks for the party, were sitting pretty in the back of the truck. There was a case of those glass bottle colas in the back as well, a treat for Vi. She checked her watch, and saw she was 10 minutes late to her smoke. She slid the pack out of her pocket and lit up, staring at the front door of the empanaderia before looking over to Jinx who was leaning against the side of the truck. They just looked at each other for a moment. Vi blew the smoke from her drag out the side of her mouth, and Jinx shifted her gaze suddenly down at the groceries.

“So how’s Cait? Haven't seen her around in a minute. I’ve missed her.”

Vi looked back at the front door of the shop, thankful for the cigarette.

“She's good. Been busy though. She's uh, she's going back to her family’s estate this summer, so she has to make sure every loose end is tied up before she can ship off.”

“Damn, fancy fancy. An estate? You really bagged a sugar mama.” Jinx teased with a half hearted chuckle.

“You’re telling me.” Vi took a risk and looked over at Jinx again, and was rewarded with the site of pink irises staring back at her. “I’m glad that the two of you get along so well.” Jinx’s smile faltered a bit.

“Yeah, me too.” Her heart just wasn't in the words coming out her mouth. “It’s, yknow, hard not to get along with her. She was a real sweetheart, helping me shop and stuff when I first came into town. She uh, she even helped me pick out my outfit for tonight. She’s pretty good at the whole “Big sister” gig.” Jinx swallowed and looked back at the groceries. “I'm glad that she's been so good for you. I'm happy for you both.”

“Yeah… you know I uh, I hope you know I feel the same about you and Ekko.” Vi lied. She'd been doing that a lot, lately.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, totally.” She took a long drag. “What's not to love? My baby sister and my brother, together.” Vi cleared her throat. “Okay, that came out wrong.” Vi tried to correct as Jinx burst out laughing.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Jinx cackled out as Vi pinched the bridge of her nose.

“You know what I mean! He's as good as my brother, so like, I trust him and shit, or like...” Vi shook her head, shrugging in surrender. “Oh what the fuck ever, cackle it up there over there, Wicked Witch of the West.”

Jinx’s laughter eventually slowed, seemingly more to do with her being out of breath than anything as she replied. “I'm sorry, your face was just priceless.” Vi finished her smoke and shook her head.

“Yeah yeah, fuck off.” She tossed the butt in the back of her truck, a small mountain of them collected in one corner from months of smoking while Jinx drove her. “How about you stay out here, and I'll go get the order put together?”

“What, are you planning to rob the place? I'm not playing getaway driver in this pile of scrap. I’m pretty sure you keep it together with duct tape and faith. I'll just walk in with you.” Jinx said, stepping away from the truck to stand by Vi, who just sighed and shook her head.

“Fine, but you aren't allowed to judge me for this, and Caitlyn never hears a word, got it?” Vi asked pointedly.

“Oh God, what the fuck are you doing?” Vi didn't respond, walking toward the front door, flexing her muscles a little bit just to get some blood pumping.

“Heyyah Lisa, how's life treating you, sugar?” Vi asked, sauntering up the counter. Lisa was in her late 40s, with her pale blue hair up in a tight bun that had more than a few strands escaping. She was wearing a sweater that hugged a bit tighter than ought to be professional, with the faintest hint of old tattoos peeking out under the cuffs and collar.

“Well well well, long time no see, Vi.” Lisa said with a sly grin, faltering slightly when Jinx walked in. Lisa leaned back from the counter. “Oh my, who is this?”

“Relax, Lisa, this is my sister, Jinx.” Vi said before cocking her best grin. “Listen, Lisa, I need to ask a favor.”

“Oh I see, not a word for more than two years, and now you come in asking about favors.” Lisa taunted, that grin slipping right back in place the moment she realized Powder wasn't a potential jealous partner.

“It's Ekko's birthday today. You know he loves this place. I just wanted to see if we could arrange for a bit of a… bulk order.”

“Sweetheart I told you years ago, we don't cater or deliver. Not even for you.” Vi rested her elbows on the counter.

“And I'm not asking for either. I’m just asking that before y'all close up, throw one big last batch in and let us swing by to pick it up. You know I'll pay well.”

Lisa hmm’d for a long moment, chewing on her cheek.

“For old time’s sake?” Vi offered as her last ditch effort. Lisa rolled her eyes, but Vi could see the pink in her cheeks.

“... Fine. But if you’re paying up front and I swear to God if you aren't here by 10 minutes after closing I will personally hunt down that piece of shit truck of yours and dump every single empanada open on the interior.”

“At this point I'm pretty sure that would be an improvement.” Jinx offered up, Lisa chuckled.

“I like her.” Lisa said to Vi.

“Everyone does.” Vi grumbled, pulling her card out and listing out the order. She slid the card over, signed the receipt, and walked out of the place, holding the door open for Jinx and flashing a grin to Lisa one last time before stepping back out into the parking lot.

Watch be damned, she was pulling another cigarette out before Jinx even started laughing. To give Jinx credit, she at least waited until they were back in the truck.

“Oh my fucking God! You absolute fucking dog!” Jinx punched her in the arm. “You flirt with the owner of the Empanada shack?”

“Her dad owns the shack. She just runs it.” Vi corrected, her father’s old lighter whipping out to finally light her smoke. “God, I feel dirty.” Vi mumbled, taking a drag as she rolled down the window. “And she's a nice woman, I'll have you know. She fosters cats, and has some really great ink work she got done during a summer in Peru. Thank you very fuckin much.” Jinx just stared at her, brow furrowed.

“Wait a minute, you two actually…” Vi couldn't look at her. “Holy shit you did.” It had less mocking bite to it, but Vi didn't like the knowing realization that seemed to underline the new tone.

“I… I was new to town.” Vi said, like it explained everything. She took another drag and looked out the open window. “Me and Ekko were waiting on our first check from this diner we worked at, money was tight, and we stopped by here figuring we could at least afford one each… she slipped us half a dozen free of charge, and her number was on the receipt.” Vi shrugged, shame and guilt bubbling up from places she didn't know existed in her. “We talked for a while, she was nice. Wasn’t like I had a lot of friends around here, and I mean she's pretty.” Her resemblance to one of the two occupants of the truck went unremarked on, but not unnoticed. Her first time with Lisa was the first time she thought of Powder while sleeping with another woman. Vi would've sooner gone to her grave then admitted that at the time, however. “One thing led to another.” Vi shrugged again, took a drag, and huffed it out the window. “I don't even know why I'm justifying myself like this.”

Jinx rested a hand on her shoulder, and Vi looked over at her, brows knit in concern and confusion. “Vi, I'm not judging you. I just…” she didn't finish the sentence. “I'm sorry.” Vi sighed and rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hand until she saw stars.

“It's all good. I'm just… it was a really rough part of my life, and Lisa was really good for me at the time.” Vi tossed her cigarette out the window and rolled it up. “Okay, so we have to swing by at close to pick them up. I'll need help doing that.”

“I'm sure we can find a helper, maybe Jayce.”

“Yeah, that'll work. Alright, homeward bound.” Vi said, leaning her head back against her seat. “Do you think you can trim my hair before the party? I look like a fucking mess.”

“Yeah, but after you shower. I'm not letting that oil slick anywhere near my good trimmers.”

“Oh, what happened to it being hot?”

“Yeah it’s gonna be real hot when my trimmers burst into flames and light your whole head on fire.” Jinx replied.

An hour later, Vi sat freshly showered and shaved in a chair from the dining table, towel around her neck, as Jinx took scissors and clippers to her hair.

It would be normal, if she completely ignored the fact that every time Jinx's fingers brushed her neck, it made her break out in goosebumps. It was even worse than before the concert. Now she knew what Jinx’s fingers felt like digging into her back, trying to pry her off when she’d let her drunken degeneracy take her too far.

But she managed to keep herself level headed enough to make it through the cut. However, when Jinx took the towel away and Vi went to check herself out in the mirror, she was surprised by what she saw. “What happened to the usual?”

“Meh, the old undercut was a little boring. So cliche. I kinda like you with this shag, though, and thought leaving it might do you good. I was right.” Jinx said from the bathroom doorway. It wasn't the long floppy mess she had grown out. The sides were buzzed neatly like she liked, the back was trimmed, but it was longer than she usually did.

“I look kinda like Silco”

“Yeah, if he had way more style and a lot less hair gel.” Jinx ran some product through her hair and mussed it up. When she stepped away, the hair was smoothed back but not right to her scalp, with a lot of messy texture worked through it that complimented her face.

“Does it look good?” Vi asked hesitantly.

“Of course it does, I cut it.” Jinx said with a twirl of her scissors.

“Seriously.”

“Yes, you look very handsome.” Jinx assured, standing by Vi and looking at her in the mirror. Vi smiled at her. Vi’s watch buzzed, letting her know she could have another smoke. Vi looked back to Jinx and saw her fiddling with her hair, still not able to get a ponytail that could work.

“Do you want help braiding it?” Vi offered.

“God, yes please.” Jinx groaned, and Vi just chuckled.

“C'mon, we can set up on the loveseat. You got hair ties?” Jinx flashed her wrist, where two bands hung. “Oh you had this planned the whole time.”

“Damn right. I wasn't gonna do it. You see all this fuckin’ hair?” Vi sat on the loveseat and Jinx settled on the floor between her legs, back against the couch. Her hair had grown a lot just in the 6 months she’d been staying there. The choppy bob she’d had now hanging down to her shoulder blades.

Vi worked her fingers slow and steady through the process of it all. They didn't talk much, but they sat together in a comfortable quiet while watching some video essay about Scooby Doo Jinx streamed from her phone.

The months apart were showing, and Vi got a bitch of a hand cramp half way through the second braid. Jinx just cackled at her.

“There.” Vi said, finishing the last braid. It didn't contain all her hair, quite a lot hung out at the bangs, but Jinx seemed content, leaned back against the couch, head resting against Vi's knee.

“Thanks, Vi.” Jinx said. She didn't look back.

“Of course.” Vi sighed, sitting in the silence before she spoke again. “I love you, Jinx.”

“I love you too.”

Jinx didn't move from her spot on the ground. She just stayed there, the room's silence held up by the mountains of everything they weren't saying.

Vi’s watch buzzed. She'd gone a whole two hours without smoking.

“Shit. Guess we should get ready.” Vi sighed as she saw the time.

“Come on, the video has like 15 minutes left.”

“... Fuck it.” VI said, sitting back on the loveseat. It’d been 3 months and 15 years. They could have 15 more minutes.

“You look like a fucking eyesore. I love it.” Jinx said in a rush as she stuck an earring in one of the half-dozen piercings in one ear, sauntering up next to Vi in the kitchen. She wasn't wrong. Vi had a black button down with a bright messy pattern of blue flowers printed across it, along with a searingly bright blue tie, suspenders and her nicest jeans (she'd managed to get the oil stains out of the knees!). “Is the food almost ready?”

“Nachos have a while, but It should time out perfectly so folks can settle in, I'll bring em out, we can snack then I can grab the empanadas with Jayce.” Jinx nodded.

“Thank you.”

“Of course. You look beautiful.” Vi said, looking at Jinx’s own attire. The skirt was black, leather, and well fit to her body, ending with what felt like miles between its hem and the top of her knees. The top was tight, pink, low cut, and strappy. She had torn fishnets covering her arms, and pink tights on her legs tucked into boots. Over it all, she was wearing a leather jacket from Vi's side of the closet. It was way too big for her, the bottom of the jacket barely an inch higher than the bottom of Jinx’s skirt, and covered in pink and blue leather paint.

“Thank you.” Jinx said, looking away from Vi quickly, smoothing out a wrinkle in her top. “I um, I need to do my makeup.” Her lipstick was already pink and pristine, and her eyeshadow was flawless as ever, but she still walked toward the bathroom. Jayce, however, barged in a moment before she could disappear down the hall.

“The man is on his way. I saw his car pulling into the neighborhood while we were coming up the stairs, eta like 5 minutes, tops.” Jayce dropped a half dozen wrapped packages on the kitchen counter, alongside a massive case of beer. He popped it open, grabbing one out before stuffing the rest of the case in the fridge.

Mel walked Viktor into the apartment behind him, the two linked at the arm. Viktor looked paler than he usually did, but Vi realized she hadn't really taken a look at him sober in months. She knew for certain that he was walking with a more pronounced limp however. He tripped on his own foot ambling toward the kitchen, and Vi managed to catch him in time.

“Shit, Vik, you doing okay?”

“It will pass.” Was all he said, righting himself with Mel and Vi’s help. He looked at Vi for a moment, something quizzical in his eyes. “Violet… you've cleaned up.” he poked at the sloppy knot on her tie.

“Yeah. Did Mel pass along my apologies?” Vi offered with a chuckle.

“She did. I'll admit, I didn't believe her. But, you aren’t drunk before I've even arrived, so I'll take that as progress. The hair… well, I suppose it suits you.” He patted her lapel. “In your own way.” Vi felt her hand go up to her head on instinct.

“I like it. Jinx cut it for me.” His lip curled up slightly.

“I see. This shirt is very nice. You wear blue quite frequently.”

“Yeah, it's uh, it's my favorite color.” Vi replied simply. Jayce snickered as they heard footsteps through the pitifully thin walls of the apartment.

Ekko walked in to a hustle of greetings from the whole apartment.

“Well if it isn't the man of the hour!” Jinx said, sidling up to Ekko and pecking him on the cheek. She left a little pink lipstick mark in her wake, and Vi looked away quickly, going to tend to the nachos.

The party settled in, folks grabbing drinks, finding seats around the circle of couches. Ekko and Jayce thought it only right to start the night off with a celebratory shot. Vi opted not to join them.

“Move your asses, hot nachos.” Vi set the massive baking tray out on the table in the middle of the couches, set on top of a few oven mitts.

“Holy shit, you didn't.” Ekko said, looking at the mass of chips, cheese, beef, jalapenos and beans as he stood from the couch. Vi brought a couple bowls of guac and sour cream out as well.

“Yes I did.” Vi said with a smile.

“Thanks, Vi.” He moved over and pulled her into a hug. When he pulled away his hands still rested on VI's shoulders. “You look good. Glad you seem to be doing better.” Vi smiled at him, doing her best not to let her gaze drop to the lipstick still on his cheek.

“Had a buddy of mine pull my head out of my ass for me today. Kinda wish I’d let you guys do that a while ago when you tried. I hope you're planning to drink, cus I'm staying sober tonight, and someone has to finish that case Jayce packed.”

“Oh fuck no, I got an early drive tomorrow, I'm not getting plastered. Just pleasantly buzzed. Powder said there's a bong though, so I might just take her up on that.” He let Vi go, looking at the tray. “Christ man, these look delicious.”

“And that ain't all.” Vi said with a grin. “I'm making a quick supply run. Got us a big ass order from a certain empanaderia.” Ekko lit up even brighter.

“No fucking way!”

“Only the best for you, man.”

“Thank you, Vi. Seriously.”

“Eat up. Jayce, im enlisting you to help me pick everything up in a bit.” Mel leaned forward in her seat, grabbing a chip.

“Pretty late to be picking up food. Are you sure they'll be open? Thebes is a ghost town at night.” She asked before popping the chip in her mouth.

“I convinced the woman running the counter to let us bulk order right before they close up tonight.”

“Wait a minute, you saw Lisa?” Jayce asked from his seat between Vik and Mel on the couch. “Does Cait know?”

“Relax, dude, I didn't turn a trick for empanadas.” Vi said with a dismissive wave. Jinx giggled.

“You might as well have.” Her traitor sister taunted.

“Oh I gotta hear this.” Jayce said, Mel even perked up.

“Jinx, you promised.”

“I promised I wouldn't tell Cait.” Jinx replied, before returning her focus to the others. “She literally like, pumped her arms up in the parking lot trying to look all buff before she went in. Then when she gets in there it’s all “awe c'mon baby, for old times sake” with these big puppy dog eyes.” Jayce cackled like a banshee at that.

“Traitor! Judas! Kain!” Vi sputtered in betrayal.

“All that for empanadas? Really?” Mel asked.

“It was for Ekko.” Vi grumbled.

“From what I’ve heard, you’ll flirt with anything blue in a skirt.” Viktor observed, warning a cackle from Jayce.

“Jayce, dude-” Vi's attempted interception floundered as Jinx looked at Jayce. Mischief was painted on her face like the tattoos embedded in her flesh.

“Oh I gotta hear this. What am I missing?”

“Violet has a bit of a type.” Viktor said, looking at Violet like she was some prototype he was testing. “At least that is what Jayce has always told us.”

“Oh?” Jinx prodded, mischief gone, curiosity remaining.

“Hey, c'mon it's Ekko's day today, we got better shit than my exes to talk about.”

“Which ones should we avoid talking about? The blueberries? Oh shit, right, that’s all of them. There's Lisa, Oh and Periwinkle, and Lest, Sasha, Melissa. Shit, I considered Cait as a change, since at least her hair is dark blue. ”

Ekko cleared his throat. “Listen Jayce, lay off, okay?”

“I…” Jayce looked at Vi, and seemed to realize he'd said something he wasn't meant to. Vi glared at him, jaw clenched tight. “Sorry, man. Was just giving you shit.” Vi swallowed the frog in her throat and scratched the back of her head. She could feel Jinx’s eyes digging into her soul and couldn't face it directly.

“It’s all good man.” She offered her best attempt at a chuckle. “I'm uh, I'm gonna go smoke. Jayce, meet me down at the truck in ten?’’

“Y-yeah, sure, Vi.” He said as she stepped out. She could still hear him through the door. “I give her shit about it all the time, I just thought we were kidding around.”

“You didn't mean anything by it.” Jinx offered.

“I think Violet is simply not finished with the issues she has been dealing with these last few months.” Viktor added.

Vi finally walked off to her truck. She didn't like being talked about behind her back.

She was on cigarette number three when she heard footsteps on the stairs. She flicked the but into the back of her truck and took a breath.

“Listen, Jayce, I’m sorry I-””You know, it's rude to talk with your back to someone.” Jinx interrupted. Vi turned around and was greeted by the sight of her sister standing there, still wearing her jacket. “You've got a real bad habit of that.” She continued with a chuckle

“Where’s Jayce?” Vi asked, taking a keen interest in the rocks at her feet.

“He thinks you're pissed at him, so I told him I would go with you instead.” Jinx explained, like it was just that simple.

“I'm not pissed. He just likes picking at old wounds.” She lied.

“Yeah, that girl Lest really seemed to strike a chord.” Vi took a breath.

“Yeah.” Vi said, resigning herself as she pulled another cigarette out, lighting it with a flick of her father's lighter.

“... You gonna tell me why, or am I gonna have to waterboard it out of you?” Vi shook her head.

“Hasn’t enough of my damn past been dredged up today?” Vi finally mustered up the stones to look her sister in the eye again. There was understanding there, concern, curiosity. Most importantly though, there was one thing Vi couldn't understand until it blatted her in the face less than an hour later, a nervous hope.

“C'mon, Vi. I can tell you're hurting. Talk to me.” Jinx tugged on the sleeve of Vi’s shirt.

“Lest… Lest was my last serious relationship before Cait. Kind of my only other one.” Vi admits. “She was the first woman in my life who didn't treat me like I was weird or broken for being stone. And she was one of the first other trans people I got to be with. She was….well she was like you.” Vi realized how that sounded and quickly clarified. “She was a trans girl, I mean.”

God she was fucking hopeless.

“Y-yeah, no, I got what you meant. N-no confusion there.” Jinx crossed her arms and gave a forced laugh. She smiled up at her, but there was a sympathy in the stare that felt almost pitiful, or maybe jealous. “I’m glad you had someone back then… What happened?”

“Honest to god? I don’t know. Me and her were doing good, I thought we really had something. Then, well… She up and ghosted. Completely vanished. Her family was always weird with me, so they didn’t tell me shit, and she never picked up the phone. She just… vanished.”

“That’s awful. I can’t believe Jayce would be so cruel about something like that.”

Vi groaned. “He doesn’t… He doesn’t really know. I never got an answer as to what happened, and so I just… never told him. He knows we split, and that it was her call, not mine, but not much else. He still thinks I dumped her over her hair…” Vi swallowed as she realized once again she’d planted her boot in her mouth. “What Jayce was saying… I wasn't… I didn't…” She couldn't finish her sentence.

What the fuck could she say?

The best defense she could manage was that she hadn't been intentionally looking for women to fuck that looked like Powder, at least not until after being beaten bloody trying to save her. But what did that say about her that she’d spent so many of those years before then unknowingly doing the exact same thing? Her whole life had been chasing after the ghost of the woman standing in front of her, and now all these years later Vi was so warped, twisted and perverted by it all that she could barely look her own little sister in the eyes.

Jayce was right to mock her. He should have done worse. He should've beat the dogshit out of Violet from day 1, until it rewired whatever the fuck Vi had wrong with her, she knew that. She deserved it. She wanted it.

She breathed in black clouds as her eyes fell on the tattoo on Jinx’s neck.

“I know.” Jinx said, running her thumb along Vi's knuckles. Vi felt a panic strike deep into her core. “Everyone has a type. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It doesn't make you a monster.”

Of course, of course that’s what she meant. What could Vi have thought she was saying? “We should go.”

“Dibs on driving.”

“Fine by me.” Vi said, holding the driver’s side door open. Jinx hopped in and Vi followed suit on the other side.

The drive to the empanaderia was quiet and tense. Jinx had a grip on the wheel like it was a lifeline, so tight that Vi could see her white knuckles even against the pale backdrop of her skin.

Vi could hear every click and sputter in her old truck’s engine, and each one felt like a condemnation in and of itself. How had life gone so wrong that her and her sister sitting in a truck together was such a tense, uncomfortable silence?

Well, Vi knew how. She got shit faced and groped her little sister in the bathroom of some faggot cowgirl convention. Then she chickened out from actually apologizing for it, pretended she was just black out drunk and drank herself into a stupor for three months trying to escape the guilt.

God her life was a cruel joke.

That train of thought was not going anywhere good, so Vi broke the silence.

“So, how is the tattoo shop going?” Jinx startled slightly, lost in her own thoughts.

“Good. Things are good. Kind of stressful. Sevika says that I'm doing really well with all my technical skills, and that she thinks I'm ready to start working with real clients, not just fake skins. Which is really fucking scary. Like, it's a real person. It's real, not imaginary, not a fantasy I make up in my head to make me feel better. Now it's real, and that means I could really fuck it up. I could really make such a drastic mistake that everything is fucked and I can't ever fix it or make it better. I could make one stupid fucking decision and ruin my entire life and make everything tense and weird and scary and destroy everything I've been fighting for for nearly 15 years…” Jinx went quiet suddenly and cleared her throat. “You know, everything I've been working for with my uh, my art and tattooing.”

“I think you're overthinking it.” Vi said. “I know given my last few months this is gonna sound hypocritical, but nothing good comes from running from shit that scares you.”

“But… but what if it turns out it's all wrong? That I'm not ready? That all these signs I thought I saw were just bullshit dumb luck and coincidence and I'm really really crazy, just like they always said?”

“Who said? The Foxworths? Fuck em. They can rot in piss.” Powder’s hand left the stick shift, resting on Vi’s hand. Vi caught Jinx’s pink irises flick over to look at the scar on her lip.

“But what if they were right about me? That I'm some… crazy person who isn't fit to be out here in the world? What if I'm really a curse? A jinx? What if… what if I hurt you?” Jinx yanked her hand away, hastily adding “You know, like hypothetically hurt you while giving you a tattoo. N-not that I expect you to get a tattoo, or like let me tattoo you.” Jinx groaned. “Fuck I'm sorry that makes no sense.”

“I’ll let you tattoo me.” She said.

Jinx looked at her like she was crazy.

“Vi, you don't understand what that would mean. Like, it's a permanent change, no going back, no ability to undo it.”

“Yeah, I trust you.” Vi said with a shrug. “I mean I trust you with my hair, don’t I?”

“That's different!”

“Jinx,” the name seemed to sting her sister as she said it. “I trust you with two knives bolted together near my face and neck. I'll trust you with a needle. I trust you not to hurt me, I trust you to always try and do what's right… I'm sorry that I haven't been able to be someone you can say the same about.”

“Vi, I trust you with my life.”

“And I trust you with mine.” Vi said as they pulled into the parking lot, Lisa’s car was the only one left aside from Brandi. “I really am sorry for how I've been acting the last few months… I don't know what came over me.”

“I don't blame you… I'm sorry too.”

“What do you have to be sorry for?” Vi asked. Jinx looked like she was about to reply when Lisa knocked on the window to the truck.

“You had me worried I was being stood up.”

Vi hopped out and Jinx followed. “Sorry, Lisa. Truck had some trouble. You know how she can be.”

“Ha, I'm amazed you're still driving this old girl.” Lisa said.

“Can't beat the classics.”

They loaded several boxes of deep fried joy into the truck on the floor of Vi's seat.

“Looks like the dessert ones are still inside. I'm gonna go grab em. Hop in and I'll be out in just a sec.” Vi said to Jinx.

Vi walked up to the shop and saw Lisa with a box in one hand and keys in the other, locking the front door. “Thank you again. I really do appreciate it.” Vi said, sidling up to the woman.

“Of course, Vi.” She offered her the box. “I know I played up being a tough bargain earlier, but I hope you know you can come around without having to play up the Casanova routine. You doing okay? Taking care of yourself? You look like you haven't slept in years.”

Vi sighed. “That bad?”

“Worse than when you first blew into town, babe.” She said.

“I'm on the mend, I'll be okay. Just uh, dealing with some stuff.” Vi admitted. “But no, I'm doing good. I've got a good gig, I have my own place.” Lisa smiled at her.

“That's good for you! You and Ekko should stop by some time, I'll throw in a few extras just for old times sake, and no, not those old times.” Vi chuckled and took the box.

“That sounds lovely. Maybe I can bring my partner around. Haven't been up til now since she can be a bit… possessive.” Lisa gave her a smug look.

“ Of course, she's always welcome back.” She chuckled. “I knew you were lying about that girl earlier. I could see the jealousy on her face. Oh you always were a terrible liar.” Lisa said with a playful poke.

“Lisa, I swear, that was my little sister.”

“Oh please, sweetheart. You can cover a lot of things, but I'm not blind. I saw the way that girl looked at you. She might as well have had lil hearts in her eyes.” Lisa shook her head and chuckled. “Goodbye, Vi. Take care of yourself, and I don't just mean survival.”

“Goodbye…” Vi mumbled out, looking at the ball of blue hair sitting patiently in the driver’s seat of her rusted-out pickup.

She hopped into the passengers side, pulling the boxes onto her lap. “Let's roll.” Vi said as Lisa drove out of the lot, leaving them alone. The truck was running, the gear was in reverse, all Jinx had to do was put her foot down.

She didn't.

Instead she threw it in park and gripped the steering wheel like a lifeline.

“Jinx?” She flinched at the name. They sat there in the dark, the closest lights being the occasional car driving past them on the complete opposite side of the building.

“Vi… are we still sisters?” She asked, tears gathering in the corner of her eyes, still staring out the front windshield. She wiped a tear away and her hand settled in the middle of the bench. “Out of everything we lost, they didn't take that from us too, right?”

“Of course, no one can ever take that from us.” Vi said. She moved the food to the floor, turning in the old bench seat of the truck to face her better. Vi reached for her sister’s hand, and saw pink irises fall on their interlocked fingers, then look up to finally meet Vi's gaze. “I’m sorry I’ve been running away these last few months. I’m never doing that again, I swear. You’re stuck with me.”

Jinx looked at the scar on Vi’s lip, then back at their hands, eyes locked in her scarred knuckles as a tear fell down her cheek. “Vi… if it turns out that I'm wrong about everything, please forgive me.” She choked out, another tear falling down her cheeks. “Please.” She plead one last time.

Vi knit her eyebrows together in confusion.

Jinx took her hands away from Vi’s grip and the steering wheel and reached forward, grasping her by the fabric of her shirt with both hands and pulling the two crashing together. Vi felt their lips press against each other, this time stone cold sober.

It was heavenly, it was wrong.

Her sister’s fingers were firm, grasping, clawing at the fabric of her shirt and the tender flesh underneath, while her lips felt soft and welcoming against Vi's own. Vi felt the tears on Jinx’s cheeks wet the scar on her lip. Her sister's hands moved up to her cheeks, cupping them both, nails digging into the back of her neck, grasping at her, clinging on like Vi was everything she had. Vi felt blood trickle down the back of her neck as a nail broke the skin.

They pulled apart only when the need for air finally seemed to break them. Vi gasped for breath, greeted by the scent of cinnamon and apple and salt.

“Jinx…” Vi gasped out.

“Please stop calling me that.” Her sister pleaded, tears still on her cheeks. Their lips were maybe 2 inches apart at most. “That's not what you call me, that name isn't for you, I hate how it sounds when you say it. I miss hearing you say my name.” she whimpered out, resting her forehead against Vi’s. “I've tried being a good sister and I'm sorry, I can't. I can't pretend that I forgot too, I can't pretend I love you how I'm supposed to anymore. It all feels so fucking empty, I feel so empty, and I can't stand it. Today was so nice, I didn't want to ruin it, I swear. But I can't do this anymore, Violet. I can’t. I miss you, I miss the way your lips felt, I miss our bed and getting to feel close to you. I miss being able to sleep through the night, and seeing you, smelling you, feeling you there next to me on the nights where I can’t.” Powder sobbed into her shoulder, and Vi wrapped her in her arms. “I've missed you so much and I don't want to ruin today but, God please just tell me I'm right and you feel the same. If I'm wrong just… Please just tell me that you don't think I'm disgusting.”

Vi floundered, lost in the chaos of everything she was hearing and everything it meant. The first words that came to her mind were “Powder, what about Ekko, Cait…”

“I was wrong!” Powder said. “I can't fucking lie to myself anymore. I love Ekko, but… I love him like I know I should love you. And no matter how hard I try, I love you like I know I can never love him, like I've never been able to love anyone else.” Powder wiped her cheek.

“I… we… What would mom and dad say if they…”

“I don't care what the dead think of me.” Powder whimpered into her neck. She pulled back and Vi saw her mascara running down her cheeks, she felt awful at the morbid thrill the sight sent down her spine. “I just… I don't care what anyone else thinks, I don't care about anyone else. I care about you. I want you. I want to be with you. I’ve wanted to be with you for so fucking long. If you don't want this, then tell me, I can take it. But I need that to be your choice, yours, not someone else’s.”

“I… I don’t…” She couldn't tell Powder she didn't want this. She could never lie to Powder, and she could never manage to tell her no. But God, what would it mean to say yes?

“Vi… please, I need you.” Powder begged.

The next kiss is just as sudden as the previous, but Vi pulled Powder into her this time. It was disgusting, her baby sister moaned into her mouth in glee and Vi had never felt herself throb so fucking hard.

They tore into each other, fresh and raw. Vi felt Powder’s lipstick smear against her lips, and couldn't believe it. She wanted her, Powder wanted her, Powder wanted Vi just as desperately as Vi had been craving her.

Vi felt every sick and twisted part of her thrum in glee. She felt every sensible part of her screaming to stop, to do the right thing, to run. Her cock and her conscience waged bloody war on each other as Powder discarded Vi’s jacket onto the floor.

Vi pressed Powder under her, her little sister’s legs spread so easily and welcomed Vi home between them. Vi had never felt more comfortable anywhere before in her life, and that ripped apart every shred of self respect Vi’d ever held.

Powder’s hands roamed wherever they could reach. They grasped at her biceps, her forearms, her back. Powder dragged her nails in long, thin trails up Vi’s shoulders. She cupped Vi’s cheeks, now smeared with pink lipstick here and there from the messiness of their kisses, and wiped the tears from their well-worn trails.

“I’m so sorry.” Vi whimpered, bleeding out her shame as she was gasping for breath. Powder kissed one cheek, and then the other, right where they were dampest.

“Don’t be.” Powder assured, biting her lip. “I'm not.”

Powder pulled their lips back together. Just like muscle memory, Vi felt legs around her waist pull the two of them flush against each other. Vi ground her hips forward into Powder and savored the moan it drew out of the tiny woman. She was so loud, and Vi loved it.

Powder dug her teeth into Vi’s bottom lip and tore a groan from the back of her throat. Vi’s retaliation was stuffing her tongue into Powder’s mouth like she wanted her to gag on it. There were several things she wanted Powder to gag on, and even as the shame ate at her, Vi felt the thrum between her legs get that much more intense at the thought.

She pulled her lips from Powder’s and moved to her neck, lapping at her pulse point and feeling her shiver. Even her sweat tasted so sweet, and Vi kissed and nibbled and sucked on the skin, desperate to get a taste.

“God yes, harder!” Powder moaned.

“I can't, it'll leave a mark.” Vi grunted out.

“Then put that mouth somewhere you can leave one. But first get back here.” Powder growled before pulling Vi back into a kiss, Powder stuffing her tongue into Vi’s mouth this time. She moaned at the taste, still happily grinding away against Vi’s core.

Vi, however, was far too tempted by the first half of Powder’s demand. She shoved Powder's top up over her chest and pulled her lips away from her sister’s. Powder whined at the separation, but Vi felt utterly trapped by the view before her. She just stared down, slack jawed, almost drooling.

Powder dug her pretty pink nails into the meat of Vi’s arms. In retaliation her fingers dragged up the length of her sister’s thighs and spread them wider. It took no effort at all, the only thing stopping Powder from spreading her legs even wider at Vi’s request being the truck around them.

Powder wasn't wearing shorts under her skirt, and Vi was gifted the full, beautiful view of Powder. Her pale, creamy thighs laid out under sheer pink nylon, meeting at the apex where a lacy pink thong blocked Vi’s view of her last prize.

Vi could see a few thin, straight scars spreading out from that same spot. She hadn't realized Powder had gotten bottom surgery, but now all she wanted to do was devour absolutely everything before her. Her eyes trailed up Powder’s stomach. She dragged her fingers along the tattoo on her hip, the one marking where Vi had bruised her the last time they'd been like this. Past all of that, her eyes landed on tiny silver balls on either side of Powder’s nipples.

Christ, Vi thought she would pass out then and there. She tightened her grip on Powder’s thigh to keep her steady, and felt her shiver under her grasp. That only worsened when Vi impatiently dove forward, wrapping her lips around a nipple as her hand slid back between her sister’s thighs.

“God, Vi, yes!” Powder moaned in her ear, nails dragging against her scalp. Vi lapped her tongue at the nipple and piercing, drawing another squeal out of Powder. “Mmm, that's it baby. Just like that.” Powder moaned. Vi repeated the motion and was rewarded handsomely with moans and squeals pouring out of Powder’s lips like wine. Vi drank them in as she traced her fingers over nylon and lace, feeling Powder shiver again.

Vi sucked at the flesh above Powder's nipple until she was sure a bruise would form, moving her mouth over the other nipple as her hands made quick work tearing Powder’s tights open.

“S-shit, Vi, you fucking animal!” Powder giggled out. Vi looked up at her, mouth still around her tit. “Mmmm, fuck you look so good down there.” Powder bit her lip and pushed Vi down. “Show me what that mouth can really do, baby.”

Vi could get used to that kind of bossing around from Powder. She slid down, legs in all kinds of fucked up positions to accommodate the both of them on the tiny bench seat, and slid her head between her baby sister’s thighs.

God, if Vi couldn't get enough of her smell before, she had no idea. The heady mix of sweat and pussy mixed with everything else Powder made Vi's head swim better than any liquor.

She pulled the thong aside and dragged her tongue through the folds of Powder’s cunt. If she could bottle the taste she'd drown herself in it. Instead she opted to try and drain her sister dry then and there, or die trying. She worked her tongue as deep as she could and lost herself in the taste, the smell, the warmth of Powder’s body around her.

Vi lapped her tongue at Powder’s clit in long languid circles, and felt fingers tangle in her hair. “God yes, Vi just like that!” She moaned, muffled by her own thighs. Vi did as she was told, her circles getting faster and tighter, letting drool drip down her tongue and chin.

“Fuck, please finger me.” Powder whimpered out. Vi pulled her tongue away and chuckled.

“Patience, Powpow.” God the name felt revolting coming from her mouth with her head between her sister’s thighs, spit still glistening on her chin.

“I'm done being patient.” Powder declared, her fingers clenching and tugging at VI's hair, making Vi look her in the eye. “I went through months of recovery and years of waiting for you to be able to play with this pretty little hole. Now show me you know how to fuck it, God damnit.” Powder demanded, and for the second time that night Vi felt herself throb harder than she had ever thought possible.

Her mouth latched onto Powder’s clit as she stuffed two fingers into Powder’s mouth. She didn't need to give any instructions, Powder ran her tongue sloppily over both digits until they were dripping wet in a few seconds. But she wasn't content to stop there, bobbing her head up and down on Vi’s fingers, sucking on them seemingly just to tease Vi more.

It worked. God, Powder could play her like a fiddle.

Finally Vi pulled her fingers out of Powder’s mouth to move them to her cunt. Vi teased slow circles around the entrance until the grip in her hair was so tight she worried it'd rip her scalp. Then she slid in and heard Powder really scream.

Vi worked the first finger slow and steady, pumping and curling and toying around to find exactly what could make Powder loudest. She knew it was stupid, and couldn't fucking care. If she deafened herself it'd be worth it, if it got them caught, it'd be worth it. By the time she had the second finger in, Powder seemed to have given up any pretense of quiet as well.

Vi couldn't help but keep her eyes open, roaming over Powder’s chest the way it pumped up and down with her breathing, the way her mouth opened when she moaned, the way she looked at Vi so lovingly, even with the devious grin painted on her lips.

Vi pumped her fingers in and out, letting more and more drool drip down her tongue and chin onto her fingers. Every pump seemed to make the grip in her hair tighter, made the thighs around her head clench harder, made Powder moan that much louder.

Eventually Vi was sure they'd be busted, because Powder was all but screaming at every thrust. She could tell she was close, and Vi wanted so desperately to know what it would feel like to finally make Powder cum after so long imagining it.

“Vi! Vi God please I'm a-almost there! Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Vi gave one last long suck on Powder's clit as she pumped her fingers for all they were worth, and was rewarded by the feeling of Powder spasming around her fingers.

Powder came moaning Vi’s name over and over, until she collapsed back, leaning against the door. She panted desperately for breath, still clutching Vi by her hair.

“G-get up here.” Powder demanded in a pitiful little whine. Vi crawled over top of her again, and Powder pulled her down into a filthy, sloppy, wrong kiss. It was the best Vi had ever had. Powder wrapped her arms around Vi and held her tight, and Vi held Powder just as desperately. Both of them seemed to fear letting go, and letting the other risk floating away.

They cuddled like that for a while, Vi’s head on Powder’s chest, Powder’s nails dragging along her scalp. Their gasping turned to panting turned to calm, even breathing.

Vi felt her foot brush a box and groaned. “We should get back soon.” Vi mumbled.

“I know.”

It took a few more minutes before Powder finally let go. They sat up and started trying to right themselves.

“If anyone asks about my makeup, I saw a puppy without an owner and started crying.” Powder said, looking at herself in the mirror.

“I'll drive.” Vi said.

They rearranged, and Powder checked the boxes under the jacket as Vi pulled out of the parking lot, her dick still throbbing like a bitch.

“They're still plenty warm.” Powder said, looking at herself in the passenger mirror, fixing this and that detail with strangely practiced ease. She seemed to have everything she needed stashed in her purse to perfectly recreate her makeup.

Well, almost. Vi heard Powder mutter “shit, I grabbed the wrong tube.” To herself as she started applying her lipstick. They drove in silence for a while until Powder spoke again. “Vi…”

“Yea, Powpow?” Powder smiled at the name.

“I know Cait and Ekko are probably staying over tonight… once they're gone, whenever that is, can I… can I come back to our bed?”

“Our bed?” Vi asked, an almost giddy smile crawling on her lips. Powder blushed.

“Y-you know what I mean.”

Vi reached her free hand out and took her sister's in her grip. “Of course… I missed you being there.”

“Then why push me away?” Powder asked, old anxiety bubbling up in her eyes.

“I was being an idiot. I just… I didn't forget as much of that concert as I said.” Vi confessed, and Powder's look of confused hurt hit deep and precise.

“Why lie about something like that? I understand lying to Ekko, or Silco, or Cait, but… why me? I could've taken it.”

“I… I thought I'd hurt you.” Vi confessed. “I was drunk, we both were. You were shaking and nervous and trapped with me and I… I pounced on you. I thought you'd hate me. I thought me being too drunk to remember would make it more forgivable. I thought that if I just made sure it didn't happen again, then you'd be able to forgive me.”

“Vi, I was the one who kissed you.” Powder said, and it was Vi's turn to be confused, memories of the night blurring into each other, bleeding and warping the more she tried to make them concrete. “I thought you'd been so disgusted by realizing what I'd done that you puked and fled crying. I… I thought I had been lucky enough that you had forgotten and we could start over. Then you started acting so weird, and I got scared that you remembered somewhere deep down and… and hated me for it.”

Vi squeezed Powder’s hand. “I could never hate you.” She stopped at the red light and looked over. “Never.”

Powder squeezed back.

“I love you, Violet.”

“I love you too.” Honesty tasted sweet on her tongue as Vi brought Powder’s knuckles to her lips and placed a kiss against them.

Some assholes in a Tesla honked and they realized the light had turned green.

“We’re gonna have a lot to figure out.” Vi sighed.

“And we will. Together.”

They drove for a while longer, hitting another stop light. Powder licked her thumb, reaching over and making quick work cleaning the smeared pink off of her sister’s face.

“If anyone asks about why my lipstick is different, I ate an empanada while we were driving and messed it up. If they ask why we're late, Lisa fucked up and had to remake the desserts. No one should touch those until a while after the other boxes, so they won't question why they don't seem to be any warmer.” Powder coached her as she made sure Vi's hair was only the appropriate level of messy.

“You just have these on hand?” Vi said with a smug grin. They made eye contact as the light turned green. Vi hadn't realized she took the pink contacts out. Her baby blue eyes matched the color of her lips, now pressed into a hard, worn expression.

“You learned your ways to survive growing up, I learned mine. Just follow my lead and no one will know any better. We can figure out what comes next in the morning.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” Vi said, “Doesn't feel right to lie to Ekko, or Cait…” Vi felt her heart stop. “Shit, Ek… if he sees the bruises-”

“He won't.” Powder assured, a gentle hand on her shoulder. “He already had his… “goodbye present” yesterday, or I would’ve told you not to leave a mark.” Powder pulled her hand back. “I know it's not right, but we can't be rash about this. What we did in that parking lot is a felony in 48 states, this being one of them, and I have no intention of that being the only time.” They pulled into the parking lot of the apartment, and Powder fidgeted with her hands before adding. “Assuming that you want that too.”

The weight of it all hit Vi in the chest, but didn't sway her. They could make this work. Vi refused to stumble blind into the wilderness to die in shame.

“I do.” Vi assured, before hopping out of the car and moving over to Powder’s side, opening the door. “Whatever happens, we’ll handle it.”

Powder dropped out of the truck and started piling Vi’s arms up with boxes. She smiled up at her. “And don't go running away from me ever again, got it? I've been worried sick these last few months.”

“Never again.” Vi smiled. Powder looked down at Vi’s lips, then a voice called from the stairwell.

“There you two are!” Jayce hollered, Loris and Ekko beside him. “What the hell took so long?” Powder looked to Vi, one brow raised, a final question of certainty. Vi didn't flinch, and didn't look away.

“Lisa fucked up man, the desserts still had to cook when we got there. Couldn't leave Ek’s favorites behind just cus you can't stand having to wait a few more minutes!” Vi hollered back as she and Powder walked to the stairs. “Besides, y'all had nachos! Don't act like you're starving.”

“We were worried that dinosaur of a truck had finally broken down on you. 5 more minutes we were gonna send a search party.” Vi and Powder exchanged a glance, smiles still plastered on.

“Well, no need to worry. Sorry bout the wait, man.” Vi nudged Ekko with her shoulder and smiled, guilt eating at the pit of her gut. “And, you know, not getting you a present.”

“Don't stress, Vi.” Ekko assured, taking a box from her pile. “Tonight is the best present I've had in years. Good food, good flower, and good company. What's not to love?” He paused for a moment to look at her. “Hey Vi, you good man? You look really flush.”

Powder interrupted before Vi could think of a good lie. “Come on, Sparky, let's get the man of the hour back to his party.” Loris and Jayce followed Ekko and Powder, each taking a few boxes. Vi followed after them.

“Vi!” She heard Caitlyn cheer as she walked in. “I'm so sorry I was late. I got stuck dealing with the dorm authorities, they completely lost my luggage.” Caitlyn grabbed a box from Vi, leaving her with just a few. “Here, let me help.”

“Cupcake, it's fine. I understand.” Vi said, walking over to the table and setting down the boxes next to a few open ones. She wrapped her arm around Cait’s waist. Caitlyn leaned in for a kiss, and Vi snatched up an empanada, taking a quick bite. It was full of ground beef and vegetables, and Vi prayed to God that it would cover the taste of pussy on her breath. “Sorry, baby, one sec, I'm fucking starving.” She said through a mouthful of food.

She scarfed down the rest of the morsel, grabbing a cola from the fridge and downing a few heavy glugs.

Caitlyn leaned in and planted a kiss on her lips once she was done. Vi returned it, tense for the moment, waiting for a spark of realization in Cait’s eyes, waiting for the moment she was exposed. But Cait just pulled back, same adoring look in her eyes as ever. Vi only then understood why that look had always filled her with so much shame. She’d never be able to fully return it.

“Sweet, as ever.” Caitlyn teased. “I’m sorry I've been gone so much lately. I feel awful. You've been dealing with so much, and I’ve barely seen you in weeks. Now I’m leaving for home tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? I thought you left next week.”

“No, I told you weeks ago, my parents are insisting I come back early to try and make it for some big party they're hosting.” Vi swallowed down the realization she had probably been too plastered to remember any of that conversation.

“R-right. Shit I forgot.” She was concerned by how little lying to Caitlyn burdened her. “Well it's okay, we can make the most of tonight, and I can drop you off at the airport tomorrow.” Cait beamed at her.

“That sounds lovely. But the flight is going to be early. Are you sure you'll be okay? I know you haven't been sleeping well.” Caitlyn rubbed her arm and nestled in close.

“Don't worry about me. I'll be okay. I want to be there to send you off.”

“If you're sure. Maybe we can see about doing something to… tucker you out, before I go off for the summer.” Caitlyn said, a sly little grin and nervous blush creeping onto her face. Vi gave her best smirk in response.

“I think that could be arranged.” Caitlyn bit her lip.

“I like the new haircut. You look so handsome.” Vi blushed.

“Thanks. Uh, Powder cut it. Realized I was kinda schlubing it, wanted to look good for Ekko’s party, and y'know, to see you off.”

“She's very skilled. If she decides against tattoo artistry, she would make a wonderful beautician.” Vi chuckled.

“Damn, brain surgeon and a life coach.” Vi got a slap in the arm for that one, but it was playful, light, happy.

Vi’s eyes scrolled the party, seeing Loris sat on the left couch, while Powder and Ekko had their backs to her on the loveseat. Powder was cuddled up flush against Ekko. On the couch across from Loris sat Mel, Jayce, and finally, Viktor.

Viktor’s eyes were trained right on her, one brow raised barely, eyes squinted slightly. Their eyes made contact and his head cocked to the side just a bit, before his lip curled the slightest bit upward. Vi could feel the confusion creep into her own expression, and Viktor just smiled back at her before biting into a pastry, the hazelnut filling of one of the dessert empanadas dripping a bit onto his plate, no fresher than the filling in any of the others.

Vi collapsed into bed later that night, Caitlyn’s “goodbye gift” fully given, the heiress herself catching her breath sweatily beside Vi. Vi undid the buckle on her harness, tossing the leather onto the ground to the side of her bed.

Caitlyn wrapped her arms around Vi’s torso and curled into her, resting her head on Vi’s chest.

“It’s going to be hard being away from you again.” Cait said. Vi rested her arm on Cait’s shoulder.

“I know, baby. I'm sorry the last few months we had together were so… rough.”

“It's okay. I know you have things you deal with. I’ll admit, I was… worried. But I didn't want to push you and make it worse. I knew you'd talk to me when you were ready.” Cait squeezed her, laying a kiss above Vi’s heart. “I missed you. I'm glad I have my Violet back.”

Vi squeezed her back. “I missed you too, cupcake.” It wasn't a lie. She had missed Cait. She'd missed her, missed Ekko, missed Jayce and missed being able to actually be present enough to connect with them.

“I need to use the restroom before bed.” Cait said, crawling out of bed and slipping her pajamas back on.

Words kept ringing through Vi’s mind, alone now in the room. “I love him like I know I should love you, and love you the way I know I can never love him.”

Vi didn't know if it was the same for her and Cait. She did love Cait, at least she thought she did. It wasn't as much as she loved Powder, but then again how could it be? That wasn't Cait’s fault. Vi’d never loved anyone like she had Powder. But the different types of love she felt for Cait was different then what she felt for Ekko or Jayce.

Vi was passed out asleep before Cait returned from the bathroom.

The next morning Vi woke up with Cait’s alarm. They got ready together, Caitlyn grabbing a cozy tracksuit she always wore for long distances, all royal blue with her family crest embroidered on the breast, and sauntered to the bathroom. Vi kept it simple, jeans, a black button down she couldn't bother to button, and a tank top that had at one point been white but was a salmon pink for reasons Vi was still pissed at Ekko about. She didn't shower, figuring she was just driving her there and could shower when she got back.

She walked out of her room to see Ekko and Powder milling about in the kitchen, mugs in their hands. Ekko’s was a green one with his union local’s logo on it. Vi couldn't remember when he had first left it there, but she remembered damn near dropping it last month when trying to grab a glass for her whiskey.

Vi sauntered in and was greeted by Ekko chuckling. “Make enough noise last night, you animal?”

“Who the fuck starts a conversation like that?” Vi asked, grabbing the coffee pot only to find it empty.

“A tired electrician who couldn't sleep cus somebody doesn't know how to close their goddamn door.” Ekko said with a shit eating grin, throwing a crumpled up napkin at Vi's head.

Vi chuckled nervously, not looking at her sister. “Shit man, I'm sorry. You know, “goodbye gift” before the long trip apart.”

“Oh you don't gotta explain it to me.” Ekko said. “In fact I may have to drink away the memory that you tried.” Vi shook her head.

“You know what, how about I cook breakfast as my apology? Will that prevent you from like, electro-bitching at me?”

“Won't say no to that.” Ekko said.

“Can someone set me up with some caffeine while I cook then?”

“Here, let me make you something.” Powder popped out of her chair, wearing one of her own T-shirts for once and some pink shorts. “I saw this idea online and I want to try it.” She pulled out a moka pot that Vi didn't know they owned and prepped it, setting it on the small back burner as she went to the fridge.

Vi got started on a basic breakfast, bacon, eggs, hash browns. She threw her cast irons on their burners and flipped the heat on, and got to work prepping. Powder navigated around her, grabbing a mug from the cabinet while Vi was working the pan right by it. She snaked the moka pot out while Vi threw meat down in one pan, popping the top off a bottle and pouring it into a mug while Vi threw hash browns down as well. Vi flipped the bacon as Powder poured the contents of the mochapot in the half full mug, mixing it with a spoon before sliding it over to her.

Vi took a sip and was startled from her cooking. It was warm and fizzy, tasting of caramel and sugarcane and espresso. She looked at Powder, putting a half full bottle of cola in the fridge before turning back and facing her. “Well?”

“It's good. Sweet, but not, I don't know, fake.” She took another sip and flipped the hashbrowns, before pulling the bacon out and replacing it with eggs. She heard the loud hinges on her door, meaning Cait would be out soon. “Ekko man, you gotta try this.” Ekko stood and walked over, taking a sip from the mug.

“Shit that's good.” Vi took the cup back and smiled at Powder, taking another sip.

Vi grabbed a plate. “Two eggs, three bacon, and hash, right Ek-man?”

“Hit me with three eggs. Gonna be a long drive to Jersey.” He said.

“Damn, this shit’s in Jersey?” Vi asked.

“Yeah, isn't that just the bitch of it?” Ekko said with a shake of his head. “Maybe I'll have time to stop by Silco and Vander’s. Say hi.”

“Give Clouds a pet for me.” Vi said.

“Gice who what now?” Powder asked.

“Not you, a cat.” Vi clarified.

“Oh you'll love her.” Ekko said with a grin as Vi handed him his plate.

“Cholula is in the fridge, bottom shelf in the door.”

“Thanks, man.” Ekko settled into his chair again as Cait walked out in her tracksuit. Vi tossed eggs and hashbrowns on her plate and handed it off.

“For you, Cupcake.”

“Thank you, darling.” Cait gave Vi a kiss and Vi felt her cheeks burn.

She piled a plate up for herself and another one as well. She took the plates with her, two fingers holding the handle of her mug haphazardly. She set her plate down, then the mug, then set a plate in front of Powder. “Four bacon, extra fatty and chewy, two eggs over medium, and extra burnt hashbrowns.” Powder beamed.

“It's perfect.”

Vi felt proud as she tore into her own meal. She sat across from Cait, and Ekko across from Powder. They enjoyed the meal quietly, a little chit chat occasionally breaking up to mostly comfortable quiet. Vi could feel Powder’s foot brush against hers under the table.

Eventually the meals wrapped up, the dishes were tossed in the sink, and bags loaded into the backs of old rusted pickups and lovingly maintained Subarus.

The four of them stood together in the parking lot of the apartment building. Caitlyn wrapped Ekko in a hug. “I hope you're safe and learn as much as possible. Good luck.”

“Thanks, Cait.” Ekko said, letting her go. Ekko looked at Vi, and the two yanked each other into a hug, clapping each other on the back a few times. “Take care of yourself, man. You're looking better already. Don't let it slip.”

“Never.” Vi said. “You know I love you, right Little Man?” Ekko chuckled and pulled back.

“Of course, Vi. You're family. Don't worry, you're not getting rid of me that easy. I'll be right back in town before you even know it.” Ekko assured. Something gnawed deep in the pit of Vi’s gut, and Vi pulled him in for one more hug.

“Take care of yourself, brother.” She said. Ekko gave a little nod.

Powder wrapped Cait in a hug next. “You better come back with lots of fun gossip. We need some good stories for the grannies at the thrift shops.” Cait laughed and hugged Powder back.

“I'm sure my family will have no shortage. Just be sure Violet doesn't get into too much trouble while I'm gone.”

“Yes ma’am.” Powder said with a little mock salute that made Caitlyn giggle. Vi saw Ekko’s eyes on Pow and took it as their sign to go.

As they pulled away, Vi saw Powder wrap her arms around Ekko’s neck and kiss him goodbye.

Caitlyn left with a long kiss at the doors of the airport, vanishing into the crowd of travelers.

Vi returned home to find Powder still in her pj’s, scrolling her phone on the couch. Vi noticed the tiny shorts had been replaced with a blue pair of her boxers. Vi just smiled at the sight, feeling pink climb in her cheeks. She looked down at her boots, scratching the back of her head.

“You gonna stand there all day, handsome?” Powder asked from the couch.

“You have something else in mind?” Vi asked with a raised brow.

“Down, tiger.” Powder said, putting her phone away and hopping up.

“I didn't say a damn thing.”

“I know that brow.” Powder shot back, correctly. “I have the pot on the stove. I was thinking I could go for another coffee, and after that I still need to shower for the day.” Vi sighed.

“Yeah I do too.” Powder blew her bangs out of her eyes.

“Wanna shower together?”

“What happened to “down tiger”?”

“It doesn't have to be a sex thing, you goof.” Powder said, heading for the kitchen.

“Whatever lil miss “shaking her ass with every step”.” Vi tossed her over shirt on the back of the couch, leaving her in the pink tank tucked into her jeans.

“Wow, how dare a woman try and walk around her own home without being sexualized.” Powder rolled her eyes.

“Oh don't you pull that shit with me. I know how you walk. That was a lil stripper strut and you know it.”

“Oh? Been watching me walk around have you?” Powder asked, a brow raised as she looked over her shoulder. She turned back to the fridge, grabbing the half full bottle and the mochapot from the stove, topping off two mugs and handing one to Vi.

“Maybe.” Vi looked away, sipping the drink and feeling that damn red in her cheeks.

“Mmmm, someone embarrassed to be caught?”

“Fuck off.” Vi said, resting against the counter, taking another drink.

“Oh you're precious.” Powder stepped closer. She dragged a blue nail down Vi’s arm, and Vi felt her throat go dry. “Can I be honest?”

“Please.”

“I found it… a lot hotter than I should’ve when you were apologizing while fucking me.”

“I'll keep that in mind.” Vi said, her eyes drifting down to Powder’s lips. Powder’s eyes traced a similar trail, but she leaned forward, popping up on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on Vi. It wasn't some reckless drunken mess or desperate bench-seat foreplay, it was simple, slow, loving. Powder pulled away a second later.

“You don't have to think about it so much. If you want to kiss me, just kiss me.” Powder whispered against her lips. “I’ll be sad if you don't, if that makes it easier.”

“It does.” Vi murmured back, hand reaching up to cup her cheek, placing her own gentle kiss against Powder’s lips. The two separated, both taking their sips of their fizzy coffee mixture as they settled against the counter, Vi’s arm behind Powder’s back, their sides flush against each other.

“I feel awful.” Vi confessed. “Not about what happened last night. I just hate lying to Ekko and Cait.”

“I know, baby, I do too. I love them both to death, they’re family and I hate having to lie to them. Cait seems like she was really good for you, and Ekko did a lot to help you. I… I owe them both a lot more than I can ever repay. But I am done waiting for my life to be right for others.” Powder snaked her arm around Vi’s waist. “It's just temporary. We can’t break things off suddenly with both of our partners out of nowhere at the same time. People will ask questions, questions we don't have answers for.”

“I know. I just wish there was some better way.”

“I know, baby.” Powder rested her head on Vi’s shoulder. “Do you want to lay down on the couch?” Vi nodded and the two moved, mugs still in hand, to the loveseat. Powder sat against one arm rest, Vi against the other, their legs intermingled as they talked and looked at one another.

Powder sighed. “They're both leaving town for a few months. We can play the doting partners while they're gone, then once they're back, I can break things off with Ekko first. I'll tell him we grew apart, and I realized I was gay while I had all this time to myself. Our relationship was shorter, people will believe a 3 month gap ruined a 3 month relationship, easy. Me and Ek can deal with that awkwardness for a while, but it's still young enough of a relationship that things should be able to settle back into something comfortable with time.” Vi nodded along, taking another drink.

“Makes sense.” Vi said. “I guess he did ask if you were a dyke too, so it's a suspicion he would buy if it came true.” Powder smiled.

“He's a smart man. He knew I was a femme before I even did.” She chuckled, thinking for a moment before resuming her train of thought. “After that, we just wait for Cait’s school semester to get busy. If you break things off with her then, she’ll be too busy to have time to pry. We can give it some time, I'll do my best to console her and help her get over it. I'm hopeful that we can make things work. I really do love her to death, I don't want to lose her.” Vi stared at Powder for a long minute after that. Her hair was still in braids, but the sleep had made them messy and tufts were sticking out everywhere. Her legs leaned against Vi’s, one ice cold foot stuck under Vi’s thigh. Vi let a hand drop down, her thumb tracing slow lines across the pale flesh of Powder’s thigh.

“You really have this all planned out.” Vi said with a smile. But Powder’s expression dropped into something shameful and serious.

“Yeah, I kinda do. Vi…” Powder looked at her, hesitancy carved into the wrinkles at her brow. “When did you know? How you felt about me, I mean.”

Vi felt her cheeks get hot.

“After the…” she swallowed. “After I failed, and Ambessa took you back. It started as dreams, I’d be thinking about someone else in bed and then… you would be there instead. I felt like a monster. I thought something had been broken in me. At first I just tried to ignore it, tried to keep living life and being a normal person but, well… you heard what Jayce said. Even before then, my type was always you, so that didn't really work. Then it started to be the only way I could… you know…” Vi felt like a jackass, blushing like some flustered repressed high schooler.

“No, I don't.”

Vi sighed and set her mug down, pinching the bridge of her nose. She was really going to make her say it out loud.

“Powder, I haven't been able to get off without thinking of you in years.” Powder looked embarrassed this time. The pink in her cheeks made Vi want to show her exactly what she'd think about doing to her.

“I've known since I was 16.” Powder declared like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“Wait, so you…” Violet couldn't believe it.

“I guess it started before then, the thoughts I felt like I shouldn't have about. You know, dreams, fantasies. I think deep down I knew I loved you, really truly loved you, for a long time before then. But for the first few years and again after the concert, I convinced myself I was just some traumatized little girl chasing some dream. I thought being with Ekko would help, I thought being normal would just find me and click me right into my proper place if I acted it out enough. But I…” Powder sighed and wiped a tear at her cheek. “I’ve known that you were the only soul I’m meant to share this world with for the last 6 and a half years.”

Vi pulled Powder closer to her on the loveseat, pressing a kiss to her forehead, and felt both arms wrapped around her midsection “You always were the smart one.” Vi said against the skin of her forehead. “I was always looking for you. I didn't even realize it until after I lost you again. But I just… Whatever I could find that would remind me of you, that could make me forget you were gone. Anything that made me feel like you were there even when you weren't.” She felt a tear trickle down her cheek into the blue tangles of Powder’s hair.

“I would try and memorize our calls, our texts, your voice, everything.” Powder confessed into her shoulder.

“I kept screenshots and notes of it all.” Vi admitted. “Every card, every letter, all of it. Stuffed that old keepsake box to bursting. I don't even know if you remember it, but there's this little crayon drawing you did of me, the day I broke that kid's knee… some nights I’d just look at it and cry.”

“My knight in shining armor.” Powder laughed out, digging her nails into the fabric of VI's tank top. “I spent so long thinking about you like that. So perfect, so pristine, everything I wanted out of the world, made into one person. Brave, strong, caring. Everything I did was focused on finding my way back to you, because the world made sense when I did. I… I thought when I first came here, when I saw the life you had with Cait, with everyone, that maybe everything I felt was some foolish fantasy. I thought I was some silly girl in love with an ideal and that I’d find you, the real you, and you’d be flawed like any person, and it’d break the spell and I could finally be normal. But, I saw your flaws, your mistakes, all of it, and it only made it that much worse. You weren’t some fantasy anymore, you were real, and that didn’t change a thing. You were still my brave knight.” Vi tried to bite down the shuddering breath that escaped her there, and failed. Her hand moved up Powder’s back and neck until she was cradling the back of her head. She let out a choked sob into Powder’s hair.

“I felt like a monster.” Vi confessed through a choked sob. “I’m supposed to keep you safe, to protect you and look after you. I'm the oldest, I'm the butch, that's my responsibility. But I just felt like a predator because whenever I’d look at you I couldn't see my baby sister. You'd grown up, and I… I couldn't keep my eyes off of you until I drank them crossed.” Powder squeezed her, placing a kiss at the base of Vi’s neck. She pulled them back, until Vi was laid out on top of her, head on her chest, Powder’s fingers in her hair, blue nails dragging slow trails against her scalp.

“No, baby, no no no. You were never a monster, I never saw you as a predator. I wanted you to look at me. I did everything I could think to make you look.” Powder confessed, voice cracking. “Violet, there was never a moment since I came here where I had clean hands and pure intentions. I knocked on your door with every hope of seeing if you felt the same as I always had. I would've figured myself out if not, but… but I came here hoping to love you like this. This is all my best dreams come true, Violet.”

Vi sobbed into Powder's shirt, and felt her nails slowly comb through her hair. “I love you.” Vi confessed.

“I love you too.” Powder whispered, her lips ghosting against VI's scalp. She placed a kiss on Vi’s forehead. It wasn't even 8 in the morning, but Vi felt her eyes grow heavy, her ear against the fabric of her worn out T-shirt, hearing the thunking of her heart.

They fell asleep like that, Vi draped over top of Powder as her sister, her partner, toyed with her hair. Vi’s arms were clutched around Powder’s waist like a vice, and by the time she woke up they’d both be completely numb.

They had a plan, they had each other, and really the former was an afterthought now that the latter was true.

Vi misses that certainty as her reminiscence is once again interrupted by a violent coughing fit, this one however only stops after she is curled over, face down in the hospital toilet, puking into the bowl. When she flushes, the water is red. She looks at the bedside clock. 4 in the morning, and she still can't sleep worth a shit.

“Ekko will be here soon. Then Isha. I'm pretty sure she's bringing Prema too.” Powder doesn't respond. Vi didn't expect her too but the silence cuts regardless. Vi drags her hands down her face, letting out a long, exhausted sigh. Her hand falls back to Powder’s. She worries her thumb across her wife’s knuckles. “I don't know what I'm doing anymore, baby.” Vi admits. “You were always the smart one. Now you're gone and I'm stuck down here.” Vi rubs her teary eyes with the palms of her hands until she sees stars. A muddy old pocket knife sits in the pocket of her jeans.

She sighs and looks back at her wife. She's beautiful. Vi wishes she was there so that she could tell her. But Vi knows exactly how the conversation would go.

“You're beautiful, you know that?”

Powder would chuckle at that and look at her, eyes half closed from fatigue, eye bags worse than they ever were, even when they were apart.

“You always say that.” Powder would reply.

“And it's always been true.” Powder would smile at her and run her thumbs along Vi's knuckles, she'd look at the scars on them, Vi would pretend not to see how sad they make her.

“My hair is a mess.”

“You saying I did a bad braid?”

Powder would roll her eyes and give Vi that tired little smirk that made her eyes scrunch up. Vi always loved kissing the spot where her eyes scrunched, and the crows feet started coming in. Powder hated it, but in that way that made her giggle and smack at Vi playfully, so Vi did it anyway whenever she could.

“You know I'm not.” Powder would retort. “I'm not wearing any makeup.”

“When have I ever cared about that?” Vi would give her a little smirk, she'd roll her eyes again.

“I have bags under my eyes so bad that they might as well be Louis Vuitton.”

“Damn, got me a femme with expensive tastes.” Vi loved using that one whenever Powder made that shitty joke. When her treatments got rough, she'd make it at least once a week.“Besides, I'm just as guilty.”

Powder would look at her differently then. Vi could see the worry creasing her forehead, even as she looked at the expressionless face of her wife on the hospital bed.

“That's part of the problem. You look like shit, honeybear.”

“I know. Can you blame me? This cot isn't exactly luxurious.” Vi would say with a chuckle. “But I'm not the one we're taking care of right now. You're sick, babygirl, don't worry about me. I can take care of myself.”

“You and I both know that’s a lie. You're absolutely capable of it, but you're not doing it.”

“Never was when you weren't around. Y’know what they say, old dogs and old tricks.”

“Baby I'm not getting better, and I'm not the one I’m worried about. Why didn't you tell me about your diagnosis?”

Vi would sigh and lean back in her chair, but never far enough away that their contact would break. She was trying not to cry, but her voice would crack no matter what.

“Powpow, please.”

“Baby, talk to Ekko. He’ll help, he always has.”

“He won't get it. No one will.”

“He's your brother, Vi. He's one of the only other people who gets you like I did.”

“My darling beloved, no one on this earth gets me like you do.”

“I don't think that's true. Jayce and Ekko have been there for you through everything. They’ll understand. They’ve understood far worse. If Ekko can be a good uncle to Isha, after all the shit we put him through, he’ll understand this. You just know he’ll be able to convince you if he's given a chance.” Powder would read her to filth and smile that tired smile that she knew Vi could never say no to.

Vi didn't want to think about that.

“I love you.” She says it out loud. Powder doesn't respond.

She tries to think of something else, but she finds her mind wandering back to the day she almost lost her brother.

Chapter Text

EKKOEkkoekko:Hey, Cait, I know it's still a month out, but do you know when you're landing back in town?
CaitlynK:I haven't bought my ticket yet, but I was planning on coming in a few days before the semester starts, like usual. Why?
EKKOEkkoekko: I'm getting done with my work shit a little earlier than I expected, was thinking maybe I would go home a little early.
EKKOEkkoekko: Powder has been really quiet lately, I'm worried about her. Idk, just seems like her and Vi were really going through it before we left, maybe it's getting bad again? Thought maybe a little surprise would help ‘em both.
CaitlynK:Oh that's a lovely idea, Ekko!
CaitlynK:I understand completely. Violet has been awfully quiet as well. I’m worried she might have started drinking again.
EKKOEkkoekko:I doubt Pow would let her do that.
CaitlynK:I know, I just worry. I think the surprise idea is just lovely. Let me see what dates I can find for tickets!

Vi didn't want to wake up. It was her Sunday, the last day off before she had to go back to the shop, and she was cozy and comfortable in bed.

“Baby, come on, we gotta get up.” Powder said, nuzzling into her neck. Vi grumbled, arms wrapping tighter around the smaller woman.

“Cozy. Fuck off.” Was all Vi bothered to mumble out. She could feel Powder chuckle against her neck, tiny fingers dragging along Vi’s ribs. She'd forgotten to put a shirt on before she fell asleep.

“We’ve got a busy day, honeybear. We gotta wake uuuup.” Powder kissed her cheek and shook the both of them a bit in bed. Vi groaned and begrudgingly let her go. Powder sat up at the edge of their bed, her arms reaching above her head in a long languid stretch. She’d forgotten to put on just about anything before she fell asleep. By the time she was done, she looked to Vi, their eyes meeting. “Oh, I see. So that got your eyes open.” She teased. Vi smiled, laid out on her back, looking at the tussled mess of Powder’s hair and the remnants of last night's make up still on her face.

“You're beautiful.” Was all Vi offered in response.

“And you’re very handsome. Now, how about we get you out of bed.” Powder stood up, grabbing Vi’s wrist and feigning trying to drag her away. When that failed, she gave Vi a look that only spelled trouble.

Powder sauntered out of the room, her steps slow and even, hips swaying in a way Vi knew damn well was intentional.

“Fine, guess I'll just have to shower alone.” Powder sighed like a fuckin drama queen, walking out of the room.

“It’s a bluff.” Vi mumbled under her breath. Then she heard the water start. “God damnit.”

She stepped into the bathroom a moment later. It was a small one, the toilet directly next to the shower, both across from the counter and sink, where Powder stood naked, toothbrush in hand.

“I knew you were full of shit.” Vi grumbled, stepping up to the sink and grabbing her own toothbrush.

“Not my fault the hot water takes forever.” Powder feigned innocence, toothbrush stuck in one cheek. Some toothpaste dropped onto her chin, Vi wiped it away with her thumb, starting to brush her own teeth with a dismissive wave in Powder’s direction. She didn't buy it for a second.

They finished brushing, and Powder stepped into the shower while Vi took a leak in the toilet.

“So what the fuck is going on today that we had to get up so early?” Vi asked, playfully through the shower curtain.

“Oh hush, it’s not that early. We’re grocery shopping, then stopping by the studio to finish up your back, then we have drinks with Mel, Vik and Jayce.”

Vi stood up, stripped down and stepped into the shower behind Powder. “Any reason why we packed so much in today?” Vi asked, reaching over her sister, grabbing for the bar soap.

“For the same reason we had our little dinner date last night. Because I get one more week of it just being us and Jayce’s little clique. Which means we get one more week before I have to start sharing our bed again and we have to worry about being even more careful. So I'm making the most of it while I can, and you’re gonna let me.” Powder declared, a hand on one cocked hip.

“Bossy lil femme, aren't you?”

“Yup.” Jinx responded, flicking Vi's nose with her loofa.“Luckily, I’ve got a butch who likes being bossed around.” She said, poking Vi in the sternum with a blue nail.

“Got me there.” Vi said, wiping the soap off her nose and pecking Powder on the lips. “Need help with the shampoo?”

“Yes, please!” Powder said, turning away as Vi pumped the shampoo into her hand, before slowly working it into Powder’s hair. There was an ungodly amount of it already, but Vi liked helping Powder take care of it. She dug her fingertips into Powder’s scalp, slowly working the shampoo into a rich lather, hearing Powder sigh contently, leaning back against her.

“God, you spoil me.” Powder hummed against Vi’s chest.

“Mmm, you give as good as you get.” Vi gave her another peck, and had it returned. “You're good to rinse.”

“Thanks baby. Let me put the conditioner in, then I'll get your back.”

Vi turned her back to Powder, and felt the loofa, covered in that same apple pie body wash, touch against her spine.

“Not tender, right?”

“No, it feels good.” Vi assured. “Hasn't been tender in a while.”

“Good.”

“How’s it look?” Vi asked over her shoulder.

“It looks amazing, not to toot my own horn. Your skin takes ink so well.” She felt Powder’s nails trailing slowly over the lines of the design Powder had etched into her skin.

“I think I'm just lucky to have a great artist.”

The first tattoo Powder gave her was on her forearm. It was a simple layout of gears, belts, pistons and sprockets. It came out beautifully. Then, Vi told powder she wanted something bigger, something with meaning.

They stayed up for hours over the next few weeks plotting over it all, and now most of it sat in ink under her skin. Just like the design on her forearm, a stylized mesh of parts and pieces of one very specific engine. At every vent, piston, and gap in the diagram, out poured blue and white clouds. Just at the start of her rib cage, two daggers dangled from their place on either side of Vi’s spine.

Finally Vi felt hot water wash away the suds on her back. “It's gonna look so pretty with the last of the shading and the highlights.” Powder said, pecking a kiss on Vi's shoulder. “But the view is wonderful already.”

Vi turned back to face her partner and took in the sight of her as she washed the conditioner out of her hair. Soap suds and water dripped down from the top of the cloud tattoo on her neck, past a smattering of bruises and newly added clouds across her chest and hips. Vi’s eyes dripped lower, past her bellybutton and stomach, both clad in their own fresh bruises, then dipping between her thighs.

“Planning to just stand there gawking, prettyboy, or are you gonna do something?” Powder asked, her wicked little grin telling Vi everything she needed to know. Vi couldn't help but feel a similar grin split her lips.

“Got something in mind?” Vi asked, stepping closer until Powder had her back to the tile. Vi could see the goosebumps across her skin as the cold of the tile hit her. Her pierced nipples perked up, and there was a strange thrill in watching it happen. Vi looked back up to meet Powder’s gaze, and saw it focused squarely on her lips.

“Get on your knees.” Powder breathed out. VI didn't need to be told twice. It was cramped, but she fit herself into place in front of Powder, whose back was still flush against the cold tile wall. “Good boy.” Powder said, fingers raking through VI's sopping wet hair, settling at the crown where she grabbed a tight fist full. “Come on, baby, you know what I want, don't you?”

Vi did, and she felt like being an asshole about it. She laid kisses against Powder’s thighs, nipping at the soft skin with her teeth, hands braced just above her spread knees. Every teasing kiss and bite made the grip on her hair tighten that much more, and Vi just kept at it. She placed a kiss right above the soft blue curls below Powder’s stomach, and felt the growl of agitation before she heard it. She looked up to see that same evil grin on Powder’s lips.

Powder huffed, shoving Vi’s face between her legs. “Come on you dumb mutt.” She cood, making Vi throb as she finally gave up on her game and lapped at Powder’s clit.

“Fuck, Vi~!” she heard her sister moan from above. She put one of Powder’s thighs over her shoulder, lapping at her lips with her tongue now that she had better access. Powder welcomed her with a moan so loud Vi worried the neighbors would complain again. Vi felt her head go light as she pulled back to gasp for air, breathing in the absolutely addictive smell of Powder’s wet slit.

With barely a second of breathing, she was pushing back between her sister's thighs and her tongue went right back to work, changing between hungry exploration and dragging long circles around her clit.

She could gauge how well she was doing by the death grip on her scalp and how desperately Powder moaned her name. The grip grew tighter, the moans more frequent and more desperate, and Vi decided her cruel streak was well broken as she locked her lips around Powder’s clit and sucked.

“God yes, Vi I'm coming!” Powder moaned, the leg over Vi’s shoulder clamping down as Vi felt the other leg get shaky. Vi wrapped her hands around Powder’s waist, bracing her against the wall and supporting her weight as Powder panted desperately above her.

Once Powder had her sea legs back, Vi let go and clambered back up to her feet. She hadn't realized how sore her knees had gotten. Powder gave her a hand up, saving Vi from eating shit when one foot nearly slipped.

“Easy, tiger.” Powder purred. Her eyes were half lidded and her pupils blown out like dinner plates. “You got more in you?” She asked, biting her bottom lip. Vi got a wicked idea in her head.

“Always, babygirl.” Vi said, turning the water off. “But my knees need a break. Feel like spending some time on yours?” Powder’s eyes, somehow, got even wider, as did her grin.

They hastily dried off with their towels, Powder snapping Vi in the ass with hers trying to hurry her. Vi snatched the towel back and dangled it over Powder’s head until a very swift flick to the forehead dissuaded her. She chucked the towel into the corner and sent Powder out into the hall with a smack on the ass. Somewhere in the three steps between the bathroom door and the door to their bedroom, Powder pulled her down into a kiss.

That kiss held, even while they stumbled through the door to their room. However, it did not hold when Vi tripped over her own damn feet and sent them tumbling to the floor. Powder, still giggling at their fall, hopped on top of Vi, still on the floor, and pulled her back into another kiss.

They separated again, panting for air, and Powder stood up. “Where’s your harness?” She asked, looking around the room as she helped pull Vi up.

“I can't remember, I was like half conscious when I took it off.” Vi said, fumbling around until she tracked it down, half buried in Powder’s dirty clothes pile. It was tangled up in a wad of shimmery blue fabric that Vi recognized as Powder’s dress from the night before. God, it hugged every curve on her body so well Vi was getting lightheaded just thinking about it.

She sprayed off her cock with some toy cleaner by her bedside and wiped it down before slipping the harness into place. The leather backpad ground against her dick and she could just tell she wasn't going to last long.

“God, you look absolutely mouth-watering.” Powder said. “Get your ass on the bed.”

“Yes ma’am.” Vi said, sitting on the edge of the mattress, legs already spread.

“Good boy. So obedient today.” Powder knelt between her legs, all but licking her lips as she stared at the light blue plastic cock sticking out from Vi’s pelvis. “I think you deserve a reward.”

Vi was a sensible butch, she knew that it was rubber. She understood that it was not in any way attached to her nervous system and that anything she could feel had to be a result of movement rubbing leather on her t-dick.

She knew that as a rational adult with a functioning brain.

However, she was pretty sure 90% of the blood in her body was at that moment occupying the 2 inches or so of meat sticking out between her legs, rubbing agains the back of her strap, so her brain wasn't functioning worth shit. When Powder dragged her tongue along the base of Vi's strap, her cock, she swore she felt every single god damn centimeter.

“Fuck, Pow-” she grunted out, making Powder’s eyes gleam.

“I barely touched you.” She teased, placing a hand on either thigh as she lapped her tongue against the tip. She took the tip in her mouth, and Vi could swear she felt her swish her tongue around it.

Powder started bobbing her head up and down, her hand stroking whatever wasn't in her mouth, pressing the leather down against Vi’s meat. “Jesus Christ, babygirl.” Vi moaned out. That only encouraged her, her bobbing getting faster, the pressure on her dick stronger. “Fuck, Powder! Powder, God I'm so close. God baby, thank you. Thank you, fuck-” Without even a hand on her head, Vi watched her choke down 7 inches of powder-blue rubber.

Whether it was the sight of her sister looking up at her, nose buried in her treasure trail and cock completely deepthroated, or the pressure of the leather on Vi’s dick, Vi came right then and there. She came so hard she saw stars and had to collapse back onto the bed to keep from falling forward on top of Powder. She'd done nothing but sit there and she was panting for air as she heard Powder’s lips come off her cock with a loud pop.

Powder crawled up onto the bed beside Vi, propped up on her hands and knees, staring down at her.

“Good?”

“You're either an angel or a succubus. Maybe both. Probably both.” Vi mumbled out, half-dazed. Powder just grinned at her.

Then Vi's phone alarm went off.

Vi had the same alarm every morning, she'd had to start doing that about a month ago after a few too many times almost sleeping through her alarm for work. She hadn't even thought to question why Powder was waking her up instead of the usual alarm, but when Vi turned her phone over, sure as a sunrise, it was the usual time for them to wake up.

Vi looked at a very proud looking Powder.

“You sneaky lil bitch. You had this planned from the start!”

“It's not my fault you're predictable.” Powder justified, sitting back on her feet, hands on her hips. “Besides, I didn't hear you complaining, mister.” She poked Vi in the sternum, her pristine blue nails shining as one jammed into her chest.

“No complaints here.” Vi said, stretching out. “I am, however, going back to bed.”

“I’ll get the ice water.”

“I'm up.” Vi said, popping back up onto her (admittedly shaky) legs. Powder giggled and Vi couldn't stop herself from smiling at the sound.

Vi settled into a comfortable outfit: work pants, boots, and a pink button down that had some dorky flamingo pattern. Powder loved it, so fuck it, why not? Vi buttoned it up about half-way, though she was pretty sure she buttoned them one off from the correct button holes.

“Hmmmm, is this outfit too sexy?” Powder asked, holding up a few items on hangers from their closet. Vi didn't even bother looking.

“Why would that matter? We're going to the shop then out with friends. Dress however you want. Who cares what anyone thinks?”

“I'm not worried about other people’s opinions, baby, I'm worried about you being able to keep your hands to yourself around our friends.”

Vi looked at the hangers in her hands.

“... The leather skirt is really cute, but maybe swap it for those Daisy dukes instead. Still hot, but uh… not leather. Less tempting.” Vi offered, to a very pleased-with-herself smirk from her sister.

“Noted, keeping the skirt in mind for a special occasion though.”

“You're evil.” Powder just grinned at her. The outfit was cute, a baggy long sleeve that had been chopped into a crop top with a few too many holes, black shorts, fishnets that were torn to shit for various reasons Vi may have been responsible for, and some cute blue over-the-knee socks.

“I need to polish your boots again.” Vi noted as she and Powder walked into the tattoo shop.

“They're fine.” Powder said, leading them to the station she had been sharing with the newest artist at the shop.

“They're just looking a little dry. I'll polish em before we go to bed tonight.”

Zaunite Ink wasn't exactly thriving, it was a shoddy ink shop in a college town. But the walls only had some water stains, and they were covered in hundreds of framed flash sheet displays that Vi was almost entirely sure weren't stolen off of Google images.

The tattoo table was in relatively good repair, and Vi sat down on it as Powder prepped her station, ink and machine. “You sure we're gonna have time? I thought you said we had like, hours left.”

“Yeah, there should be plenty of time. Just don't be a bitch and take too many breaks like last time.”

“Oh fuck you, sorry I was a little squirmy while you were cheese-grating my ribcage with a needle.”

Powder flicked her in the nose with a gloved hand.

“Shuddup.” Powder said. “And lay down. I'm just about ready.” Vi sighed and took off her shirt, tossing it onto the back of Powder’s rolling chair.

Vi laid out on her stomach, hearing her sister’s music blast out of the shitty shop speakers. Not twenty seconds later, Powder was straddling her back and hunching over her, dipping her needle and jamming it into Vi’s skin.

An hour into the session, the door rang open. A tall sepia-skinned woman strolled in, seeming to catch her eyes on the two of them.

“Hey, Sev. Didn't realize you'd be in today.” Powder beamed, seemingly completely unconcerned with the fact they'd been caught with her straddling Vi.

“Jinx.” The woman acknowledged. “Can I walk in here one time without seeing you in the middle of some crazy shit?”

“Awe, come on. You gotta admit, for me this is pretty tame.”

“Are those… did you mount your ink caps on your client's shoulder?”

“Yeah, duh? Easier access. This girl is built like a shit brick house, this is legitimately the most ergonomic way I could figure out to do this. You're the one always telling me to spare my back.” Powder pointed out. Vi could hear the woman grumble under her breath, dragging her hand down her face.

“Who the fuck even is this guy?” The woman asked. Vi, still face down on a tattoo table, extended a hand outward to shake.

“Vi. Nice to meet you. I’d stand and shake your hand proper, but uh. Occupied.”

“Hey don't move, numbnuts! You'll spill my ink.”

Vi heard another groan, and felt a hand shake her own.

“Sevika.” she let the hand drop and Vi could feel ink drip onto her shoulder. “So, you the boyfriend I hear so much about, then?”

“No, he's out of town.” Vi said simply, feeling Powder tense on top of her.

“I thought you said you had some kind of fancy dinner date planned with him last night? You haven't shut up about that god damned boy for months now.” She felt Powder pinch her ribs in retribution as she lied with practiced ease.

“He left town this morning. Won't be back for like, a week.”

“Oh thank God. If I had to hear about that fancy dress one more time...” Vi heard Sevika meander over to the main tattoo station. “So who’s this one?”

“This is my sister, Vi.” Powder said, returning the needles to Vi’s skin.

“Well you two sure seem… comfortable with eachother.” Sevika muttered.

“Don't make it weird, Vik. She's my sister for god’s sake.” Had Vi not been temporarily terrified of being busted, she’d’ve lost it laughing at the irony.

“So you're Silco's other brat then.” Sevika quickly pivoted. Vi turned her head, finally able to get a decent look at Sevika now that she was seated. The woman had her long hair pulled back into a high, short ponytail. She was wearing some fatigue pants tucked into well loved old combat boots, and a tank top that showed off more than it hid. Her left arm had extensive burn scars covering the majority of the skin that was left, a significant portion of it gone, replaced with a prosthetic. Her left cheek also had thin, spidery burn scarring, spanning the skin from her chin to her eye. The rest of her skin was covered in various tattoos

“How do you know Silco?” Vi asked, brow furrowed in confusion in a way that Sevika quickly mirrored. She hunched forward in her seat, elbows on her knees as she stared Vi down.

“I've known Silco and Vander since you were high as my knee, kid.” Sevika said plainly, throwing her heels up on a table, leaned back in her chair.

“Come on Sev, she doesn't know.” Jinx said plainly. “Sevika used to work with them and our parents in the mines. That's part of the reason she hired me.”

“Hey now, don't sell yourself short as some legacy hire. I brought you on because I saw talent in you, and I've been proven right. You've taken to a needle like Cobain took to smack.”

“Easy to do when I've got a big willing canvas to practice on.” Powder said, patting Vi on the head.

“How do you go from being a miner to being a tattoo artist?” Vi asked.

Sevika offered her missing arm as a response. “Got burned, bad, trying to dig folks out of the fire.” Sevika said plainly. She pulled a cigarillo from her pocket, sliding it between her lips and lighting it up with a lighter just like Vi’s father’s. “Losing half your God damned arm is not exactly conducive to a long and illustrious mining career. Plus, when the union fell apart, I was one of the ones that got blacklisted by the industry.” Sevika sat there, puffing away on her cigarillo.

“I didn't know the mine was union.” Vi said. “Not surprising with Silco but still.”

“It wasn't. That was the problem. Maybe if it had been, we all wouldn't be dealing with the consequences now.” Sevika seemed to catch VI's eyes focused on the lit end of her smoke. “You smoke, kid?”

“No ma'am. Quit 84 days ago.” Sevika chuckled at that, taking a long drag off hers before snuffing it out on the ashtray on her table.

“Good for you, kid. Never saw the point in it. Got a lot worse shit in this world trying to kill me. Guess all of us do.” She chuckled at a joke Vi wouldn't understand for another year.

Powder went back to her work, etching long burning lines into VI's skin with a wide needle. It hurt a lot less than the line work, but it was still a bitch.

After a while Vi felt Powder’s phone buzz in her back pocket. Powder snagged it, granting Vi a merciful break from the needle.

“Mel-bell is asking the group chat if she can bring someone along tonight.” Powder declared.

“Oh God, are they adding another person to their weird not-polycule?” Vi groaned into the tattoo bench.

“No, she says it's some friend of hers that had a date cancel. Must be from school or something.”

“Sure, fuck it, why not.” Vi said, shrugging and immediately regretting it.

“God damnit, my ink!”

Powder refilled her ink cap and went back to work.

“So this is the magnum opus I've been hearing so much about then?” Sevika asked from her seat.

“You know it!” Powder said. Sevika grumbled and sat up from her chair, walking back over. She stood over Powder’s shoulder, and Vi could feel her eyes looking over her back. “It's based on a 3 liter, 6 cylinder Subaru engine. Obviously I had to stylize the hell out of it, but I think it turned out really good.”

“A Subaru engine?” Sevika asked, chuckling. “I know it's a stereotype, but I feel like this is taking it a bit far.”

“She's a mechanic. Besides, that damn car means a lot to her. To us both.” Sevika shrugged.

“So was temhe dick and balls shape you drew here intentional?” Vi felt Sevika point somewhere near her ribs.

“Wait, what the fuck, I didnt-” Powder sputtered, panicked. Sevika laughed.

“I’m just screwing with you, kid. This looks good. The shading is solid. You start the highlights yet?”

“No, that's next up.” Sevika chuckled, slapping Vi on the shoulder.

“Good luck, boy. This much white is going to be fuuuuuun going in.” Sevika walked back to her station. A while later some guy walked in and she started a tattoo on him as well.

Finally, several hours later, Vi sat back up on the bench with a fully completed back panel.

“Christ, you're evil.” Vi mumbled, downing most of a Gatorade and what she was pretty sure was twice the recommended dose of Tylenol.

“Oh please you big baby. It's done.” Powder said, swapping her gloves for a fresh pair and producing a massive roll of second skin. She took her time placing each sheet until it finally covered the entirety of Vi’s back. “I'll have you wear that for the rest of the night. Depending on how it bleeds, we will peel it off either tonight or tomorrow and I'll help apply a new coat. After that, I can just help you use Vaseline.”

Vi nodded, not really paying attention. “I'm fucking starving.”

“I told you to tell me if you were hungry! Last thing I need is you fainting on me.”

“Hard to notice I'm hungry when a pint sized pipsqueak is stabbing me!”

“Pint sized? Fuck you! Not my fault you're a fucking lumberjack.” Powder flicked her ear. “Let's go get you some fast food. You need fat, carbs, and sugar.”

“God that sounds delicious.” Vi crawled off the table and delicately threw her shirt back on. She still managed to fuck up the buttons. “You good driving?”

“Yup!”

Several greasy burgers later, Vi felt much better. She dozed in the passenger seat of the truck on the drive back to their place, Powder’s thumb rubbing delicate circles across her knuckles.

Vi took a well earned nap on the couch while Powder did her makeup and got ready for their evening.

About half an hour later than they should have, they got back in the truck, and hit the road.

The bar was a shitty college dive, nothing more, nothing less. Thebes had a single gay bar to its name, and even then it was basically a party club owned by some straight assholes that had some pride flags and hosted drag shows. Vi still would've probably preferred that spot, the drag queens loved her and the kings were pretty good dudes and dykes, but most of its patrona were just straight girls going to dance with their boyfriends and gawk at the community like it was some kind of faggot safari.

They walked in together, and saw Vik and Jayce sat at a table tucked in the distant corner. Vi did her best to sneak up behind Jayce, suddenly springing on him. He jumped out of his chair like a spooked deer, clutching at his chest.

“Ah! Fuck, Jesus, Vi!” Jayce put a hand to his heart. “You scared the shit out of me!”

“Yeah, that's revenge for your little “fake tarantula in the toilet” prank last week. Asshole.” Jayce shook his head and gave Vi a hug, along with Powder.

“Jinx, I can't imagine how you live with this woman.” He said, shaking his head.

“Oh she has her perks.” Powder said with a wave to Jayce’s companion. “Vicky, looking precious as ever.” She sauntered over and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“Powder, dear, your smile is a breath of fresh air in this musty hell.” Viktor said, pushing himself up on his crutch to give her a one armed hug and return the kiss to her cheek. “You look lovely.”

“Oh stop.” Powder giggled, walking over and taking the seat next to Vi.

“You two keep that up folks are going to think you're together.” Jayce said with a chuckle. Vi cackled.

“Oh please, that boy is as gay as the day is long, and Powder’s a fucking dy-” Powder’s heel dug into her foot. Vi caught herself, clearing her throat quickly. “Done deal, you know, off the market. Since uh, she's with Little Man.”

“Jeez, Vi. Choke on your own spit or something?” Jayce said, slapping her on the arm. Viktor, however, just looked at her with that same god damned look he had at the party. He looked at her like a puzzle to be solved.

She liked Vic, she really did. He was a nice guy, they got along well enough, hell he even got tipsy once and they compared top surgery scars. He was an alright dude, and he was Jayce’s right hand-job man, so Vi kinda didn't get to dislike him, but fuck if that look didn't make her equal parts pissed and nervous.

She chuckled at Jayce's little taunt. “Yeah man, must have. Throat feels a lil dry, haha. I was thinking I might snag a drink. Anyone want anything?”

“I'm okay, but thank you, Violet.” Viktor said with a smile.

“I'm good too, got a beer in me but I wanna keep myself good to drive.” Jayce assured.

“When are Mel and her friend showing? And it's a friend right? I'm not gonna have to deal with a third “friend” always showing up with you to everything at my place, am I Jayce?” Vi asked with a smirk. He got a bit red and Viktor opened a book Vi had not seen him holding previously.

“No, nothing like that. I don't even know who she's bringing. She just said it was some girl in one of her general courses who needed something to do tonight. Should be here in a few, though.”

“Aight, guess I’m just getting for us then, Powpow.”

“Oh, I'll tag along!” Powder said.

They made it to the line to order at the bar and Powder pinched her elbow.

“Jesus, sorry.” Vi said. “I caught myself.”

“With my help, and all the subtlety of a train wreck.” Powder teased. “We need to be careful, esepcially with Caitykat and Sparky coming home next week. We can't go getting caught, and that's like twice today you’ve almost done just that.”

“Oh you can't count that shit in the shop. How was I supposed to know you'd been talking about me to your mentor?”

“Cus you're literally the best thing in my life. Of course I'm going to talk about you!” Powder pinched her again.

“Ow shit, Jesus, okay! Quit pinching me.” Vi said. “And that's… really sweet, actually.” Powder blushed as the line for the bar moved closer.

“I mean, yeah. Like, I genuinely would go crazy if I couldn't talk to someone about you. So I figured… you know, Sev doesn't really know Ekko all that well and like, 90 percent of the shit we do is stuff she could feasibly believe me and him would. So I just swapped the pronouns and avoided specifics.”

“Well, clue me in on that next time, okay?”

“I will. I didn't even realize she was coming in or I would have.” Powder nudged her with her elbow. “Think you can avoid outing me as a femme for a few more weeks, until me and Ek split and I can actually come out?”

“I'll do my best. I just can't believe it's not obvious to everyone.”

“Let's count our lucky stars for that.” Powder said, kicking Vi's boot with hers and smiling. They got to the front of the line, the crowd at the bar so packed Vi was practically leaning over the top of Powder’s shoulder as the younger woman ordered. “Malibu and pineapple juice please! Do you have any coconut cream? No? Okay, yeah just that then.” Powder said, chipper as ever.

“Hey, gimme a cola.” Vi ordered over her partner’s shoulder, bracing one hand against the bar at Powder’s side. She leaned her head down just a bit to whisper in Powder’s ear. “See that's the shit I'm talking about. That’s a femme ass drink order.”

Powder rolled her eyes. “It's basically a Pina colada. Nothing special.”

“Whatever you say.” Vi chuckled in Powder’s ear. “ And uh… just so you know, I um… I tell Loris about the cute shit you do around the apartment and just say it's stuff Cait did while she was in town.” Vi admitted, scratching the back of her head with her free hand. She saw pink in Powder’s cheeks as the bartender brought their drinks. Vi tossed him three fives and hollered to keep the change before stepping away from the bar, walking to the others.

They settled back in and Vi felt Powder’s boot settle right up against hers, the tiniest little connection without risk of being spotted. Vi sipped her cola and adjusted in her chair.

“You good, Vi?” Jayce asked.

“Yeah, got done with the back piece a couple hours ago. It's just a little sensitive.”

“Oh shit, it's done then? Let’s see!” Jayce said, sitting up in his chair. Vi noticed Viktor’s hand moving away from Jayce’s thigh under the table.

“For real?”

“Yeah, come on! Someone besides Cait is telling you to take your shirt off for once, hard to believe I know.” Vi stood up and heard Powder groan.

“Oh my God you're actually doing it.” Vi pulled the flamingo shirt off of her and turned her back to the boys. “You're such a fucking dork.” Powder giggled.

“Holy shit, Vi, that looks amazing!” Jayce exclaimed, standing up and walking over to look closer.

“Beautiful work, Powder.” Viktor said, still seated. “The clouds are a lovely detail. They're based on yours, no?”

“Not quite. They're both based on this keepsake box our mom had when we were kids. It was one of the only things we had of our folks’. Guess it kinda became the unofficial Dollanganger family crest.”

“I see…” Vik said.

“Well you all certainly weren't hard to find. Why is Violet not wearing a shirt?” Vi heard Mel say from behind her, Jayce with a hand on Vi’s shoulder as he looked over the tattoo details.

“Mel, darling, you ask that as if it's an unusual state for her.” Viktor said.

“Well, glad to see some things never change.” Vi felt Jayce's hand drop from her shoulder at the same moment she felt like ice water had been dumped down her back.

No fucking way.

Vi turned, grabbing her shirt off her seat as Jayce spoke.

“Oh my God, Lest?! What are the odds?” Jayce asked through grit teeth and a certainly pained smile.

There she was, jaw just as soft and lips just as pouty as they had been damn near half a decade prior. Her nose was small, almost feline, and she stood several inches taller than Mel, maybe 2 of those inches from the heels she wore.

“Vi.” Lest said with a smile. “Good to see you.”

“Hey, Lest.” Vi said, slipping her shirt back on. “Love the hair. Black really suits you.”

Mel and Viktor just stared at her.

“Powder, this is Lest.” Vi said, gesturing between her partner and her ex, because life was hell and God was cruel. Powder looked at her, one brow half cocked and Vi gave a half-nod. “Lest, this is Powder.”

“Lovely to meet you dear.” Lest walked over to Powder's side and offered a hand to shake. Powder took it awkwardly. Vi leaned over to Jayce, gently resting a hand on his shoulder, and trying her best to crack his bones by grip strength alone, a smile still plastered on her face.

He turned his head and quickly whispered “I swear I had no idea this was who she was bringing.” She believed him. He wasn't this stupid. “Lest, can I get you something to drink?”

“I’d love a Pina colada if they have them.” Lest said with a grin.

“Best I could get was Malibu and Pineapple.” Powder said, shaking her glass. It was already empty, a state it hadn't been in a moment or two prior.

“Ooh, close enough. I'll take one of those if the offer is still up.” Jayce smiled and nodded.

“Of course. Hey, Mel, come with me. Now.” Jayce said, smiling through grit teeth as he walked toward the bar, all but dragging Mel along with him. Vi settled back into her seat, Lest on the far side of Powder, Viktor in the chair beyond her. Vi could feel his twink eyes examining her.

Vi settled her boot against Powder’s, and felt her sister press against her harder. The quiet stretched on painfully long. Finally Vi couldn't stand it.

“So, what brought you out here to Michigan?” Vi said, because “what the fuck are you doing on the opposite side of the country after disappearing without a word” would have been rude, even for Vi.

“I moved out here for school, actually. A little late, but I'm finally going for my graphic design degree.” Lest said with a smile. “Speaking of, I love your tattoos dear. Beautifully done.” Lest said to Powder, resting a hand on top of hers, fingers just barely on the edge of one of the blue clouds.

“Oh, thank you.” Powder said, and Vi saw her soften a bit. Her posture had become so stiff, and Vi hadn't even realized. “I uh, I had someone do the first few, but I did a lot of these myself.”

“Oh you're an artist?” Lest lit up like a spotlight and scooted her chair closer. “Oh you have to show me your work! Let me show you some of mine.” Lest reached into a pocket on her dress, pulling out her phone. Powder, still a bit confused, eased her posture a bit more and grabbed her own phone off the table.

“Oh, uh, sure!”

Vi saw Jayce drag his hands down his face as he and Mel stood in line. Mel flashed her an apologetic look, and Vi felt some relief in it. Okay, so this wasn't some prank.

Powder and Lest took turns showing each other art from their Instagrams. The most recent post on Powder’s page being one of Vi’s back from earlier that day.

“Oh my God, wait, you did her?” Lest asked, pointing to Vi. Powder blushed a bit and nodded. Lest looked at the tattoo on the side of Vi’s neck and smiled. “Oh that's precious, clouds to match!”

It was true. On the left side of Vi’s neck sat the topmost portion of her back panel, a blue and white cloud just like Powder’s.

“Yeah, it's my biggest project yet. Took us almost 20 hours under the needle. It would have been faster but someone isn't good with pain.” Powder said, nudging Vi with her elbow.

“Not my fault you're heavy handed with that fuckin torture device.” Vi shot back, managing a small but genuine smile in her sister’s direction.

“Wah wah wah, all I hear is a big baby crying.”

“I'm amazed you can hear anything with how loud you play your music when you work.”

“You're one to talk! Every time I stop by the shop you’ve got no ear protection and your face is stuck right next to an engine.”

“Pow, the engines aren't running when I'm working on them.”

“Not all the time, but they definitely have been. Not to mention all the fumes you're probably huffing.”

“Please, I've breathed way worse shit into my lungs.” Vi said.

“Yeah, and it took months of me badgering you to get you to quit that.” She said, flicking Vi in the side of the head.

“Oh you two are precious.” Lest said, snapping them from their little banter as Jayce and Mel returned.

“Um, thanks.” Powder said, some of the tension returning to her. Vi could swear she was leaning away from Vi subtly.

Jayce set a glass in front of Lest and Powder. “Got you another since you were out.” Jayce said to Pow, tussling her hair.

“Hey!” Powder said, swatting his hand. But, she snatched up the drink and took a glug, regardless of his brotherly douchebaggery.

“So, Lest, Mel says you and her are working together on some project?”

However, Vi wasn't paying attention to them in the slightest, turning her eyes to Powder, mouthing out “you okay?” Powder chewed her cheek a little and made a quick hand gesture under the table, one hand making an L, rotating with her thumb pressed into the other palm. “Later”. She looked at Vi with a raised brow, asking the same question. Vi shrugged and nodded toward the exit door, and Powder shook her head no. Vi mouthed “tell me when” and Powder nodded.

“-so I walk in, and I wish I was kidding here, but there's professor Sallo doing a line off of his desk. I was beyond gagged, it was insane.” Lest said as Vi tuned back into the conversation. She let her hand slip off the table, moving it over just slightly, curling her pinky around Powder’s under the table. Powder squeezed back.

“I can't believe he was so bold.” Mel said with a chuckle.

“Bold or stupid. I guess he assumed no one would bother showing up to his office hours.” Lest giggled. “So, Jayce, Mel tells me you've decided to join her in the political realm.”

“Yeah, looks like it.” Jayce said, taking a sip of a Shirley Temple. “Never really was one for politics, but she and Vik both thought that I may be able to do more good long term in office than sitting in a lab researching all the ways we're getting fucked over.”

“Still need to work on your language before you go hitting the campaign trail darling.” Mel said.

“Oh please, we're among friends. And Vi.” Jayce said, flicking his cherry stem at her.

“Yeah, fuck you too.” Vi said, brushing it off, her hand dropping away from Powder's. “You better not go turning into another no-good suit.”

“Never. I'll be the man of the people, an honest man for a bright future.” Jayce said.

“Oh, you practiced that one in the mirror, didn't you?” Vi said, leaning forward, bracing her elbows on the table as she looked between Mel and Vik. “He'd do that all the time back in highschool, I shit you not. I walked into his bathroom one time to borrow some tp, and I see him, bare assed naked, standing at his mirror practicing the way he was gonna ask out this girl in our class.”

“Oh fuck you.” He waved her off, getting a wicked grin on his face as he looked at Powder. “Hey, Jinx, did Vi ever tell you about the girl she asked to senior prom?” Powder looked at Vi like a shark who smelled blood.

“No she didn’t.” Powder said.

“Jayce, I swear to God. You promised!” Vi pleaded like a dying woman would for her life.

“I'm quite curious to hear this one.” Lest piped up.

Vi was in hell. This had to be hell. Or a nightmare. Well that one was unlikely, Powder was there. Okay, so hell.

“So she had been meeting up with this girl from the class above ours, her hair color doesn't need to be specified, and it was getting close to prom time. I should repeat, they were not dating, they made out in her truck, yes the exact same rust bucket piece of shit y'all drove here in, maybe a half dozen times.”

“Wait a minute, you’re still driving Brandi?” Lest asked, but she could already tell the answer. “Oh my God, of course.” She said with a smile.

“Anyway, Vi gets it in her head that she's gonna ask the girl to take her to prom, even though this priss has barely acknowledged her in public. So she goes, gets this big poster board from the art room, takes it out to her truck, and uses the mountain of leaking oil to paint out this thing that says “We Auto go to prom together”.” Jayce cackled as Vi put her head in her hands.

“It was a good pun!” Vi tried to defend herself.

“It really is not.” Viktor of all people chimed in.

“I agree. That's why I said she should’ve gone with “want me to be your ride to prom?”” Jayce explains.

“That is, somehow, worse.” Vik replied.

“Wrong, but anyway, she makes me drive along with her over to this girl's house and throws a couple rocks at her window. Well, the girl didn't look out. So Vi goes, grabs some more rocks, chucks em.” Jayce was visibly holding back laughter. “Well, one rock turns out to be a bit too big, and crashes through the girl's window!”

“Oh God, no.” Powder groaned, trying and failing not to laugh. Lest was giggling behind her hand, giving Vi a look that was at least sympathetic.

“Yup!” Jayce downed the rest of his drink and continued. “So she sprints back to the truck just yelling “drive drive drive!” And hops in the bed. I peel out, fucking terrified, and we go home. We go into class the next day, and get this, not only does the girl publically announce her new boyfriend, a freshman which, gross, but she then announces that she's launching the Young Christian Women’s Association at our school to “root out sin and degeneracy”.”

“No fucking way.” Powder laughed, looking at Vi. “You fumbled a girl so hard she became homophobic?”

“No the fuck I did not.” Vi started, only for Jayce to interrupt.

“No it's way better. Turns out, Vi fucked up the address in her phone to begin with, so we just broke in some complete random family’s window! The weird homophobic crash out was completely unprompted.” Jayce lost it, laughing so hard his face got bright red. Mel and Viktor tried their best to keep polite, but Vi could tell they were holding back laughter. Powder and Lest didn't even try.

“Jayce, I need you to know that I am legally obligated to kill you now.” Vi said amidst her sister and her ex’s laughter. “I’ll give you the good grace to let you choose your method of death, wood chipper or wild bear.”

Jayce just laughed harder. “Fuck off Vi, you're a teddy bear.” He choked out.

“Hey, I’ve handed you your ass more than a few times.” Vi said in her defense.

“Yeah, but you haven’t been by the boxing gym in months, man. You're going soft.” Jayce teased.

“Am not!”

“Man, it isn't a bad thing. You’re doing good. I'm happy for you. You seem like you're sleeping again, you're sober, you're… Powder, how many days is it?”

“84 day, 16 hours, 43 minutes from her last smoke.” Powder said with a quick peek at her phone.

“Yeah, see. You're doing good man. Maybe a little softness is what you need.” Jayce clapped her on the shoulder and stood. “Let me get you another soda. Jinx, you need another?”

“God yes, please.” Powder said, already tipsy. Vi hadn't seen her drink this much in a while. She just kept looking at Lest and then back at Vi, fiddling with the glass still in her hands.

The others carried on some conversation Vi couldn't really have given less of a fuck about. Vi wanted to try and do something to offer reassurance, but anything she could do would be too obvious. Their eyes met for a moment and Vi tried to offer a smile, but the one she got back was nervous, hesitant in a way she hadn't seen Powder be in a long time. Vi looked back to the rest of the table and saw Vik, yet again, studying her. She looked to Mel, and saw something curious in her eyes as well whenever they'd flit over in her direction. Vi didn't even want to hazard taking a look at Lest.

The room suddenly felt sweltering, too damn hot and still sending a chill down her back. Her leg was bobbing like mad, and Vi couldn't escape the sticky, uncomfortable feeling of her fresh tattoo.

Fuck, she was spiraling and bad.

“I’m gonna get some air.” Vi said, realizing after the fact how out of nowhere it sounded. She stood and walked through the crowd to the door.

The cool night air felt like heaven when it finally touched her. She took a deep breath in and thanked God for the quiet as she stepped a few yards away from the entrance, hanging around at the very edge of the light from the bar sign.

She didn't want to smoke, but she missed having something to do with her hands when she was getting her breath like this. Without the cigarette, she was just some freak who couldn't stand hanging around her friends. She fiddled with the pocket knife in her jacket pocket.

Vi didn't know how long had passed before she heard Lest pipe up from behind her. “Can I bum a light, mister?”

“I don't smoke anymore.” Vi said, turning and facing her. She had a little fur shawl draped over her shoulders.

“No, but I’d bet you still keep your daddy’s lighter on you anyways, don't you?” Vi saw the cigarette between her lips, a little bit of lipstick stuck in the butt.

Vi grabbed her father's lighter, flicking it open and lighting the end of her thin, long cigarette. Lest took a long drag, flicking the end off with a manicured finger and letting the smoke out slowly from her nose. “Always the gentlemanly butch.” Lest said with a smile, but something in it didn't sit right.

“I try.” Vi said, stuffing her hands in her pockets. “You seem like you're doing well for yourself.”

“I make a decent living. The fancier parts are just… presents.” Lest took a long drag and breathed the dark clouds out slowly. Vi nodded with a sigh.

“How long’ve you been a pro?”

Lest chuckled. “Not quite, baby. But close.” She took another drag. “Close to 5 years, now.” Not long after they had split.

“Can I ask if that's why?”

“You can. Doesn't mean I'll tell you.” She gave her that cheshire grin. “No, that's not why I split on you. Convenient timing, but unrelated.” Vi nodded, eyes fixated on the bags under Lest’s eyes, the price paid for the bag under her arm and a roof over her head, she supposed.

“I'm happy for you, I hope you know that, going to school and all. Never ended up being my thing.” Vi said.

“No, I suppose it wouldn't be.” A new cigarette was pulled out, Vi lit that one as well. “But thank you, hun. Really, it does mean a lot. Figured that it couldn't hurt to have a back up plan. There's always someone trying to sell something. Figured it might pay well to be the one making the ads, instead of being the product.”

“Makes sense. You always were persuasive.”

“I think you're just good at being told what to do.”

It wasn't flirtation, just a simple declaration. But it's precision hit Vi in a sad pit in her stomach. Lest had known her better than anyone else back in their day. Now it seemed like she had only dropped a few rungs down on that ladder.

“Listen, I know it's been a long time, and I'm happy now, but… do I ever get to know why?” Lest finished the rest of the cigarette in one drag.

“I guess I didn't really say much when I left.”

“You didn't say anything.” Vi pointed out. “Your sister dropped all of the stuff I’d given you on my front step and told me to talk to you. But when I tried to call, you never picked up. No one knew where you went, if you were okay. None of your friends told me shit, and I was left wondering if you were dead in some ditch or wanted me there instead. I couldn't even talk to Jayce about it, because I had nothing to tell him. All he knows is that we broke up. For fucks sake, Lest, he thinks it's my fault that we split in the first place.”

“Don't put that on me, Violet Dollanganger. You're the one who could never admit you were afraid.” Lest snapped at her. “What you told or didn't tell him is not my fault.”

“I didn't mean it like that, Lest. I just… God I thought you were dead.”

“Yeah, well… you were wrong.” Lest said, pulling out another cigarette. Vi didn't reach to light it. Lest just stood there, waiting.

Vi’s lighter clicked and the end of the cigarette burned bright red.

“I didn't want to leave you high and dry. But I knew if I talked to you about it, you'd ask me to stay.”

“Would you’ve?”

“... That’s not the point.” Vi sighed and ran her hands through her hair. She didn’t even know why she wanted to know.

Didn’t she deserve to? Did it matter?

“Where the hell did you even go?”

“Same place as every other tgirl fleeing her home town, San Francisco.” Violet shook her head. “I had a job offer, one too good to pass up. Money was getting tighter and tighter around the house, and my parents weren't exactly overjoyed at their tranny kid taking up funds and space.”

“So you jumped ship to Cali and left me behind?” Vi asked, aghast. “You could've talked to me, fuck if you needed a place to stay you could’ve stayed with me.”

“Baby, we both knew that relationship was never gonna end with a white picket fence and kids.”

“So you ditch me without a word two days after I tell you I love you?” Vi spat, half a decade old pain bubbling up in her guts.

“Vi, we both know it wasn't me you were saying it to.” Lest cut through everything Violet had inside her with a single sentence. Then she just kept chopping. “You were chasing ghosts, and I would not settle for being someone's shitty imitation. I wasn't going to be your runner up or your consolation prize. You can't tell me that was wrong of me, I refuse.”

Vi took a shaky breath. Tears pulled at her eyes and she felt one drip down her cheek. Lest wiped it away. “I'm sorry” was all Vi could manage. “You deserved better.”

“I know you didn't mean to. I could tell. But Vi, you were in an awful place, going everywhere and nowhere, and I loved you but I knew that if I stayed with you that would only make us both miserable. And I was right, wasn't I?”

“You always were.” Vi admitted, taking a long, exhausted breath. “Be real with me. Did you know?”

“That you were gonna be here tonight? Fuck no.” Lest said with a chuckle. “Mel didn't know about me and you, I'm pretty sure. I had a date cancel at the last minute, had already gotten gussied up, was bitching to her about it and she offered me to come along to hang out with her boytoy and his friends. I didn’t even realize the guy she always talked about was Jayce until I walked in. Girl is tight lipped about her private life. She mentioned someone named Vi a while back, but I figured there was no way it was you. All this way out from Denver, all these years later, I figured it had to be someone else.” Vi laughed at that.

“No ma’am. It's me. Accept no imitations.”

“Never.” Lest chuckled, pausing and looking Vi up and down. It didn't feel sexual, more like an artist seeing how the weather had worn down her sculpture over the years. “You know what really made me sure it wasn't you?”

“What's that?”

“Mel thinks you're cheating on your girl.” Lest took another drag. “Couldn't come up with a name for who with, honestly she didn't get very specific at all, but she was so certain about it. She ranted to me about it a few weeks back. That was what really had me convinced it had to be someone else.” Vi put on a smile, burying the stabbing feeling of guilt that phrase put in her chest. Caitlyn flashed across her mind as Lest kept going. “I think she's insane. I'll tell her as much.”

“How d’you mean?”

“Vi, you may be a lot of things, but you were never disloyal. You always took the whole “butch chivalry” thing very seriously. It’s cute.” The knife twisted and Vi just had to keep her smile and let the blood flow. “Besides, I saw the way you look at your girl in there. That isn't the look of someone disloyal. I figured you out a long time ago, mister. You got her name carved into the meat of that big ol’ heart of yours, and the whole world can see it. You’ve just been bleeding love all over anyone and everyone who would give it a place to drain.”

Vi looked through the window of the bar, eyes settling on a very tipsy Powder, sat with the rest of the group. Powder saw her, and Vi held a hand out, fingers extended, save for the middle and ring that bent down to her palm. She slid the hand to the side in the air. “I love you”. Powder blushed and smiled at her through the window, mirroring the gesture as subtly as she could.

“She's her, isn't she?” Lest asked, drawing Vi's eyes back to her. “She’s the ghost.”

“Yeah…” Vi admitted. She was too exhausted to lie, too tired to cook up some story. Lest pulled out another smoke. Vi lit it, and watched the burning cherry glint off a tear on Lest’s cheek. Vi wiped it away. “Good makeup. Didn't even smudge.”

Lest laughed, Vi laughed, because what else was there to do with such ridiculous bullshit.

Lest blew out a long, dark cloud of smoke. Vi felt some of it go in her lungs as she breathed. It was familiar, comforting, an old friend stopping by. But it didn't linger. They'd gone their separate ways and Vi didn't have that wound gouged in her heart anymore, didn't have a gap in her chest she was desperate to fill. Now, there was just scar tissue and a name etched into it.

“You know that if you ever end up in a tough spot again, you can always crash with us. I don't mean anything underhanded by that, just to be clear. I’ve moved on, I’m happy. I'd just rather you have a place to stay with someone you know than crash with some stranger.”

“You sure your lil wifey in there would be okay with that? She didn't seem too keen on me at first.”

“She’s trans too, she’d understand. It's a big, fucked up family. If we don't look out for each other, who does?” Lest chuckled.

“Knowing the parts of the community I do, that's one incestuous-ass family.” Vi couldn't help but laugh at that one. If she only knew.

“Okay, maybe a bad metaphor then.”

“No, I think people are just messy like that.” Lest said, putting out her cigarette on the bottom of her nice heels. She tossed the butt onto the ground and stepped forward, wrapping Vi in a hug. “Jayce was right, you know? You're doing a lot better for yourself, and it shows. I'm happy for you Vi, honest.”

Vi wrapped her arms around Lest and bit back tears whose origins she didn’t quite understand.

“Thanks, Lest. And I meant what I said. Please call if you ever need help. My number hasn't changed.”

“I know, baby.” She pulled back and laid a hand on Vi's cheek, giving it a little tap. “Always needed to be easy to find.”

“Do you uh, think all this can stay between you and me? I know you said you wanted to put Mel’s mind at ease, but… if she wants to know about my life, she can ask me herself.” Lest gave her a smile that knew too much.

“Of course, hun.” She turned and walked a few steps to the door, looking back over her shoulder. “Vi?”

“Yeah?”

“She seems like a real sweetheart, but that family resemblance is strong. Be safe.”

Vi sighed as Lest walked back into the bar.

She was too tired to care.

She was so fucking tired.

She wanted to go home and lay down in their bed.

They dipped out pretty soon after Vi returned, maybe half an hour. Powder had cut herself off, and was left moderately tipsy by the time she got into the passenger seat. Vi settled into the driver’s side, threw the truck on, and sent them on their way.

Powder was quiet, legs curled up to her chest on the bench seat. Vi knew something was wrong, but wanted Powder to have her time to think. When they hit the freeway, Vi set her hand on the bench between them. Powder took it in hers a moment later.

They walked into the apartment, and Vi closed and locked the door behind them. “Baby, do you want to talk about it?” Powder paused, staring at the couch, her back to Vi.

Her voice cracked when she spoke. “We're okay… right?” Powder asked, still not facing Vi. She seemed so small, arms wrapped around herself, head bowed down.

“Is touch okay right now?” Powder nodded, and Vi stepped closer, pulling Powder against her, wrapping her in her arms. “We're okay baby. You're safe. No one's taking you anywhere.”

“I know.” Powder mumbled. “I just… you want to be here, right? With me, like this?” Vi rested her chin on top of Powder’s head. She knew she was crying already. Vi hadn't been the only one spiraling in the bar.

“Baby, is this about Lest?”

“Yes.” Powder admitted, shaking out of Vi’s arms, leaning her ass against the arm of the couch, crossing her arms as she faced Vi, but couldn't look her in the eye. “She just… she seemed so nice, and pretty, and cool, and the way she looked at you was just so fucking tender. God, and you two spent so long outside together. I just got worried that you were having… I don't know. Doubts.” Her makeup was smearing down her cheeks.

“Powpow-””-Dont fucking Powpow me right now, Violet, I'm trying to talk to you about this seriously. Don't baby me here.” Powder snapped. Vi stepped closer and reached to take Powder’s hand, only for it to flinch away. “Can you just answer the fucking question?! It shouldn't be this hard if the answer is no!”

“Powder, I know you're scared, but I need you to let me talk to you instead of bracing for a fight that isn't coming.” Vi said, as plain and calm as she could. Powder swallowed, and Vi saw her posture loosen just a fraction. “If you don't want me to touch you, that's fine, but tell me that. Okay?”

“I… I want you to touch me.” Vi offered her hand, and after a long moment of staring at the scars on Vi’s knuckles, Powder took it.

Vi stepped closer, and Powder stood from her spot leaning against the couch. Vi ran her thumb along Powder’s knuckles, as her little sister used her free hand to wipe some of the smeared makeup and tears off her cheek. “Fuck, I'm being so stupid aren't I?” Powder muttered out, tears trickling down her freshly wiped cheeks.

“You’re being human. Today was a long fucking day, and then we got thrown a hell of a curveball at the end there.” Vi said, leaning down, resting her forehead against Powder’s in the dark of their living room. “I'm sorry if I made you worry. I wanted to reassure you more, but with everyone around I felt like I couldn't. Nothing happened between me and Lest out there other than talking and getting a little closure. I… I never knew why Lest dumped me. Now I do.”

“I know you two didn't do anything. I saw you the whole time… I didn't mean to stare. I'm sorry.”

“It's okay baby.” Vi leaned her head up, kissing Powder’s forehead. “I'm not going anywhere. I'm here because I want to be, and I have no intention of going anywhere. You're my heart and soul, Powder. I don't know who I am without you.” Powder sniffled and sobbed.

“You’d be fine. You lived without me for years.” Powder tried to sputter out.

“And I spent every waking moment of it trying to find something to fill that void, no matter who it hurt, including myself. Do you have any idea how many of our friends have told me I was like a corpse before I found you again? Far, far too many.” Vi cupped Powder’s cheeks in her hands. “Powder Dollanganger, your name will be carved into the flesh of my heart until long after I am dead and in the ground. Never doubt that.”

“I don't like thinking about you dying.” Powder whimpered out, finally looking Vi in the eyes. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so angry. I knew you weren't suddenly going to leave me. I just… I get so scared of losing you again.” She clutched Vi's wrists, placing a delicate kiss on the inside of VI's palm.

“Never.” Vi promised.

“You can't know that.”

“I don't care. If I have to crawl out of the earth itself, covered in fire and brimstone, I'll do it.”

Powder, tears still in her eyes, still clinging to Vi’s wrists, giggled. “God and you're just stubborn enough that I believe you.”

Vi smiled and kissed the tip of Powder’s nose. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Powder kissed Vi's other palm, her lips tracing their way to Vi’s scarred knuckles, then the top of her hand. “Thank you.”

“Of course. Always, for you.”

Powder kissed the inside of her wrist before snaking forward, her palms settling against Vi’s chest. She placed a kiss on Vi’s cheek, then her jaw, then her neck.

“Easy there, Powpow.” Vi chuckled, arms snaking around her partner’s waist.

“Shut up and kiss me.” Powder giggled against her neck. Vi felt fingers on her shirt buttons.

“You sure that's a good idea?” Powder rested her head on Vi’s shoulder, nuzzling into the crook of her neck, her warm breath tickling against the skin.

“I'm tipsy, Vi, not blacked out. I know what I'm doing, and I know what I want. I want to feel like I'm yours.” Powder placed a kiss against her neck, right where it met her shoulder. Vi shivered and pulled Powder flush against her.

“I can do that.” Vi said, hoisting Powder up onto her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Powder squealed and giggled, slapping at Vi’s back before being dropped down right onto the couch, Vi kneeling between her legs. She leaned forward, kissing her sister slowly, hands back in place on either side of her face. Vi savored her taste with languid strokes of her tongue as she felt Powder's fingers work the last of the buttons on her shirt, shoving the pink flamingo mess off. Vi pulled her hands away but didn't dare remove her lips as the shirt fell off down her back. Powder’s nails dug into Vi's back, careful not to touch the massive expanse of fresh ink, but still pulling a groan from her.

She pulled her lips away from Powder’s, kissing along the crest of her jaw, down her carotid to her pulse point, taking her time sucking a dark bruise into the flesh. Powder gasped, Vi kissing her way along her clavicle and sternum to the other side and sucking in an identical mark. Powder squirmed under her, digging her nails in even harder, and Vi felt something trickle down from one of the lines carved by her nails.

She pressed kisses against Powder’s bare stomach, nipping at the skin. Powder hummed and settled her fingers in Vi's hair, scratching at her scalp soothingly.

Vi slid the hem of Powder’s top up along with her bra, dragging her tongue methodically up her sternum until she latched onto the flesh of her breast, just off from the nipple. She still had a half dozen faded bruises on her chest, but Vi wanted to add a few fresh ones. She wanted to leave every little reminder she could that Vi was hers, wholly and completely. Powder was good with makeup, she could cover whichever ones they needed to.

She sucked and bit and lapped at Powder’s pierced tits until she had left maybe a dozen marks, and Powder had dissolved into a whimpering mess underneath her. Vi slid her hands down to the waistband of Pow’s shorts and undid the button, unzipping them methodically only for Powder to slap her hands away and frantically undo them, shoving her shorts down. Vi looked up at her and saw that wide-eyed, panting hunger staring back at her. Vi didn't bother pulling her shorts the rest of the way off, she pulled them to her knees and then shoved her knees to her chest. The fishnets were torn enough they were already out of the way, and her thong was flimsy enough Vi just ripped it. It wasn't one of her fancy ones, anyway.

“Christ, you fucking animal.” Powder giggled out.

“Oh please, you love it.”

“Yea-oh fuck!” Powder moaned as Vi dragged her tongue against her clit. Vi lapped at her cunt like a dehydrated mutt and savored every lick.

Powder certainly didn't sound disappointed, her moans getting louder and louder with every flick of her clit, every inch of tongue Vi stuffed inside her. Vi wasn't quiet either, between the sloppy, wet sounds from her tongue and the guttural desperate moans she breathed out against soft blue curls, it was no wonder neither of them heard the unlatching of the deadbolt, or the key turning in the doorknob, or the door opening.

Caitlyn knows that she crossed several dozen professional boundaries yesterday, but couldn’t be quite assed to care. She sits there, pondering it all in the tiny garden planted by the pathway to the entrance of the hospital.

Just the conflict of interest this case could bring her under scrutiny for should've made her give it up. She should’ve walked away the moment she saw that salt-and-paprika hair, but she didn't. Now she knows far more than she should about the self destructive decisions of an ex she never thought she'd see again.

She heaves a sigh and bites into a breakfast sandwich she’d fetched from the cafeteria. It's fine, does that even matter?

“Cait?” A man in a long green windbreaker asks as he enters the garden. He has shock white hair sitting in long twists held up in a ponytail high at the back of his head. “Well I'll be damned.” Cait stands up, leaving her sandwich on the bench.

“Ekko, looking as handsome as ever.” Caitlyn greets with a hug. “Good to see you.”

“You’re still quite the stunner yourself, Kirraman . Couldn't agree more, just wish it was under better circumstances.” Ekko admits. “I'm not sure if you heard, but uh, Powder…”

“I'm aware. I was just up there.” That's not technically a HIPPA violation, she justifies to herself. She didn't specify she was there as her doctor.

She knows that wouldn't hold up in court, but she’s well beyond the point of salvaging her career if any of this came to light anyway.

“Really?” Ekko asks, a bit shocked. “I didn't know that you three had made up.”

“We haven’t, really. It was the first time I'd seen either since…” Ekko sighs, scratching at the back of his head.

“Yeah.”
“If I'm honest, I'm a little shocked you're here at all.” Caitlyn admits. Ekko laughs, shaking his head.

“Family is weird like that, I guess. Especially where those two are concerned.” Ekko says with a shrug. Caitlyn has to suppress a snort as she laughs at the absurdity of the statement.

“I suppose you're right.” Cait admits.

“So how have you been?”

“Fine.” Cait replies, settling back at her bench. Ekko joins her, sitting beside her as she takes another bite from her sandwich. “Work keeps me busy. But I've got a quaint little apartment on the edge of the city.”

“That's wonderful.” Ekko says, beaming. “Got anybody special in your life?” Cait just shrugged.

“Never really bothered to settle down.” Cait says plainly. She had more than her fair share of drunken one night stands with random women, but never had quite thought to set down roots. “What about yourself?”

“I’ve got a partner. He's a sweet guy, works as a paramedic here in the city.” Ekko pulled up his phone and flashed the lock screen, a man with terra-cotta skin, piercing green eyes, a long scar on his nose, and a bat tattoo over the breadth of his neck. He's handsome, but seems a bit serious. “He’s a dad. We both spoil his little girl rotten, even though she’s in college nowadays. Then again I guess Vi and Pow are just as bad with Isha.” He said with a shrug, returning his phone to his pocket. “Has she been around? Poor kid is probably a mess with her mom like this.”

“No, I haven't met her. Vi mentioned she was coming tomorrow, something about having to fly back from university.”

“Jeez, poor kids.” Ekko said with a shake of his head. “I gotta imagine Vi is spinning herself crazy without Pow or Isha around.”

“So… Isha is their… daughter?” Caitlyn asks, confused.

“I'm amazed Vi didn't tell you about her already. That woman never shuts the fuck up about her. Every single time I'm on the phone with her, it's 90 percent updates on Isha’s life.” Ekko said with a sigh. “Though I guess there's been… other shit on her mind.” Ekko scratches the back of his head.

“I suppose so…”

“Is she doing okay? Vi I mean, not Pow. Vi… let me know the situation.”

Caitlyn chews her cheek. “She's doing as well as you would expect.” That answer seems to be exactly the opposite of what he wants to hear.

“Fuck.”

“... Ekko, I hate to pry, you know I do.”

“That isn't gonna stop you.” He says it affectionately, as if they're just right back to the friends they were nearly 25 years ago.

“How did you ever forgive them?” Cait asks. “Don't mistake me, I've moved on with my life. I feel I've done pretty well for myself. But just… it was different for you, even I understood that. You and Vi were family.” Ekko looks at her and leans back against the bench.

“Are family.” He corrects. “I mean, don't get me wrong, it wasn't easy. But like I said, family is weird like that, and not just in the way we’re both thinking. I was pissed at first. I mean, you remember how we found out.”

Powder heard the screaming first. She shoved Vi’s head out from between her thighs, sending her sprawling back onto the floor, back slamming against the table so hard it made her dizzy. She looked at the open doorway, light pouring in from the outside, blinding in the dark living room. Her lips and chin still slick, Vi looked into Caitlyn’s tear filled eyes.

“You're sick!” Caitlyn choked out, dropping a bouquet of blue flowers on the ground, beside it a single pink rose, left discarded as Ekko just walked away. Vi felt frozen, her entire body locked in place, a statue left to stare as her life fell apart.

“Fuck.” Vi heard Powder say, frantically pulling her shorts up. “Shit, shit, shit!” She stood up, pulling Vi to her feet before frantically pulling her top down. “I'll try to talk to Cait, you go after Ekko. We can fix this.”

Powder pushed Vi toward the door, and before Vi could think she was running, stomping heavy, oil-stained work boots over delicate rose petals.

She tripped at the first step and fell down the stairs, landing on her ass and scrambling up to her feet as Ekko approached his battered old Subaru. Vi sprint-limped toward him, getting to him right as he was opening his door.

“Ekko, please-” her hand met his shoulder, and in a flash she was on the ground, head reeling.

When she finally could lift her head again, Ekko stood over her, fire roaring in his eyes so bright it felt blinding to meet his gaze. She saw tears on his cheeks and blood dripping from the freshly torn skin on his knuckles.

His chin quivered and then clenched. She watched him swallow down the tears, then spit on the ground next to her.

He got in his car and drove away without another word. Vi tried to crawl to her feet in time to stop him, but she could only watch his retreating license plate. She could hear the 6 cylinder, 3 liter engine roar as he sped away.

Vi stumbled toward her truck, keys still hanging from her belt loop. She fumbled around to pull them off, and went to unlock her door. She caught a glimpse of herself in the glass of her driver's side window. Her eyebrow had split, blood tricking into her hair and down her face, and a blood vessel had popped in her eye, leaving her blue iris swimming in a sea of red.

She smashed her fist into the rusted metal of her car door. The metal bent in, and she could feel the pain reverberate up her wrist, choking back a sob as she threw her door open, and crawled in.

She wasn’t even wearing a shirt, but she didn't care. She knew the fire in those eyes. She'd seen it before, burning bright and leaving nothing in its trail. She couldn’t let him go, or it would burn away every shred of them, and he'd be gone forever, just another family member consumed by the flames.

She threw the truck into drive and swerved into the street.

She was at his quiet one bedroom home sooner than she should've been, and dragged herself to the front door. Her fists hit the door harder than she should've.

“Ekko, please!” She begged against the door. She knocked again, and heard nothing.

She pulled her key ring, and found the one Powder had painted an “E” on in nail polish.

She didn't think, she threw the door open and stepped in. The entryway bled into one massive room, one end of it floored in vinyl tile with a modest kitchen, the rest covered in old ragged carpet, a book case and an old TV. Standing at the kitchen sink, his hand still bleeding and his cheeks still wet, was Ekko.

“Get out.” He ordered. Vi didn't move. “Get the fuck out!” he spat, throwing a bottle of hydrogen peroxide at her. It hit the wall and splattered.

“Ekko, please, I'm begging you-””- What the fuck could you possibly have the stones to ask me for, you underhanded son of bitch?!” He spat, stepping away from the sink.

“Please, man, just let me explain. I know this is bad, but please.” He stared at her and shook his head.

“Get out.” the calm, quiet response hurt more than anything he could have screamed.

“Ekko, please.” He shook his head and stomped to her. Vi saw fresh tears.

“I thought we were family, Vi.”

“We are, man. Please-”

“Vi, family doesn't do this kind of shit to each other. Or do I get treated different since you can't finger fuck me!?” he spat in her face, shoving her back. She stumbled against the wall, but managed to keep upright.

“Man, if you gotta hit me, do it. Give me whatever you got. I'm not saying I don't deserve it.” Vi held her arms out at her sides, surrendering to whatever wrath she had incurred. “Please just let me explain.”

“I don't need a fucking explanation, Vi. I know exactly what the fuck was going on. I know exactly what you are!”

She stared at him stupidly, floundering for words. The first and only ones she could muster being “You knew?”

“EVERYONE KNEW!” He spat. “You wore it on your face like a badge of fucking honor! I knew from the day I fucking found you again, out trying to fuck that lil Powder lookalike at the holiday garden! I can't believe Jayce didn't fucking put it together!” Ekko slammed his foot against the wood door of one of his cabinets. “But you know what, I thought, I thought that maybe you didn't know. Maybe you were just fucked up and would grow out of it. I thought, when you got with Cait, that you'd finally moved on. When Powder showed up I thought you might finally fucking heal and grow and be better. I asked you before asking her out, just to be sure that some shit like this wouldn't happen, to give us all an out. But no! Instead you lied to my face then FUCKED MY PARTNER BEHIND MY BACK!” He shook his head, limping up and down the length of his kitchen. Vi saw his chin quiver again.

“Ekko, this wasn't how it was supposed to go. I didn't mean for it to play out like this, you have to believe me.” She pleaded.

“I don't care how it was supposed to go, Vi. I care that you stabbed me in the fucking back!” He looked at her like he couldn't believe she didn't get it. “You're my brother, one of the only people I thought I could trust in this dogshit fucking world. After everything we'd lost, I thought I could always count on you.” He smashed his foot into the cabinet again, and swallowed back tears. “God damnit, how could I be so fucking stupid.”

“Ek, please…” Vi’s voice came out a quivering sob, and he shook his head, another tear dripping down.

“Vi, why couldn't you have just talked to me?”

“What the fuck was I supposed to say?!” Vi asked, desperate to know what she could have possibly done in this hellish situation.

“I don't know man, anything! Something! We could've figured something out.”

“What could we have possibly figured out? What, were we gonna fucking share her?”

“No, God damnit! I don't know!” He exclaimed, throwing his arms up, exasperated. “Why, of all the insane, fucked up shit that we’ve had to deal with, did you think this was the one thing you couldn't talk to me about?”

“Because it's fucking insane! Because it's weird! Because I know this shit is wrong, but I don't fucking care anymore. How could I expect you to understand any of this?”

“Because we're family, you stupid fuck, and that's what family does!” He smashed his foot into the cabinet one last time, shattering the wood. “Because you're my brother, and I thought you saw me as the same! Because I watched you almost die in the back of that shitty little Subaru, the one you built for me when I needed it. You're family, and I love you, and you should've known that. Yeah, I wouldn't have been happy. I would've been freaked out, and confused, and uncomfortable, but I would've fucking tried to get it! Because it's you two, and I'd rather have you in my life as freaks than lose you! But no, instead you fucking betrayed me.” He collapsed onto the ground, head in his hands, and sobbed there on the kitchen floor. Vi limped toward him, dropping down onto the ground in front of him. She tried to put a hand on his shoulder, but he slapped it away, sobbing harder.

“I'm so sorry.” Vi sobbed, pulling him into a hug. He tried to push her back, but it was weak, half hearted and underpowered by their awkward position. He sobbed into her shoulder, his hands balled into awful fists that couldn't manage to actually hit her, but still tried even as they sobbed against each other. “Please, let me make this better.”

“You stupid fucking asshole.” He wept against her, his hands stilling against her back, holding her as she drowned in his rage and he bled out her apologies.

It felt like hours there, clinging to one another with all the hatred and hurt pouring out on the kitchen floor, until they were both too drained to do anything more.

Eventually they fell apart, leaning against the wall together, scraps of wood paneling on the ground around them, side by side as they stared off into the distance.

“Vi, I can't be around you right now.” Ekko finally said, head resting back against the wall, staring at the ceiling. “I just… I can't.”

She nodded numbly. “I understand.”

“I don't think you do.” He said, looking her in the bloodied eyes, his so bloodshot that they almost matched. “Vi, I love you, but I don't know if we come back from this.” She nodded again. She had nothing left to cry out, tears spent trying to douse all too familiar fire.

“I love you too. I understand.”

He nodded, pulling his legs to his chest, wrapping them in his arms.

“I… if I want to talk to you again, I'll be the one to contact you. Otherwise… lose my number.”

“Okay.”

They stayed there for several short eternities.

“Vi, I need you to leave.” He finally choked out. Vi nodded, grabbing her keyring, unhooking her key to his door, setting it on the ground between them.

She walked out past the beat up old 2006 Subaru, with its 3 liter, 6 cylinder engine, and got in her truck.

Vi hauled her sore, broken body up the steps to their apartment, finding the door unlocked. The living room was empty, Vi's shirt still on the ground between the couch and the table. Vi latched the door closed behind her.

She made her way to their bedroom, and found the room in pitch black, quiet sobbing coming from the bed.

“Clouds?” She asked, her voice cracking. Powder sat up in their bed, crawling over to the edge and scrambling over to her. She cupped Vi’s cheeks, looking at the blood dried to her face, her blood red eye, the mess that had become her entirely. “Any luck?” Vi asked.

“Cait drove off before I could get to her. Wouldn't pick up the phone, i… I don't know where she went, even if we had a second car to track her down.” Powder admitted, her face a mess of smeared mascara and bloodshot eyes. Vi kicked herself, having taken the only vehicle they could afford without a thought as to what Powder would do. “Are you okay, honeybear?” Vi had been wrong. There were still more tears in her to cry. Her voice cracked and she broke like a flooded dam.

“I think I lost Ekko.”

“Oh baby.” Powder guided her to the bed, where Vi collapsed, and sobbed. Everything hurt, from her back and legs to her head and eyes, to the very pit of her heart. Powder set Vi’s head on her thighs, running fingers through her blood-caked hair.

“Please don't go.” Vi sobbed out desperately, her fingers bunching in the fabric of one of her own T-shirts Powder was wearing as a nightgown. “Please. I can't lose you too.”

“Never.” Powder swore, pressing soft kisses to her aching temple, her lips coming back with specks of blood. “You're not the only one with a name carved into your heart, my darling beloved. Wherever we go, we go together.”

“Together.” Vi murmured. The day, in all its exhaustion, caught her. She fell asleep there, in their bed, clinging to Powder, her boots still laced and her pants still on.

She woke up somewhere around 4 in the morning to find she'd been stripped down to her boxers, her phone plugged in on her bedside table next to a glass of water and a small pile of over the counter pain meds. They sat in a neat pile next to her lighter and that mud-stained old pocket knife. Her head, throbbing and sore, was rested on Powder’s chest, her fingers still in Vi’s hair even as she snored gently.

Vi took the stack of pills, downed the water, and sent a quick text to Loris with some excuse about food poisoning. When she settled back in bed, Powder’s hands reached for her, and pulled the two back together.

Caitlyn sighs as she remembers watching Powder run after her car as she drove away.

What would life have been if she'd stopped? If she'd spoken to her, like Ekko and Vi had spoken? Would that have changed anything? Should it have changed anything?

“I had no idea that all that happened…”

“Kinda hard to find out when you burn bridges with the whole group, huh?” Ekko doesn't ask it to be cruel, he's too kind for that. But it stings nonetheless, because he's right. She lost everyone's number but Jayce’s, and even then, college had been the closest they'd been since they were children. She'd cut off any chance of ever finding closure in her pursuit to try and forget it all had ever happened.

In her defense, wouldn't most anyone do the same? The woman she'd thought was the love of her life had been caught with her head between another woman's thighs. That didn't even begin unpacking the fact that the woman had been her own sister.

“But… How did you ever make up? How could you ever forgive them?”

“It took a long time.” Ekko admitted. “I didn't speak to them for almost 3 years. That was nearly as long as I had been back in Vi’s life by that point. But, I spent a lot of time thinking about shit, going to therapy, really trying to come to terms with what had happened. Kinda like you did.” he offered with a smile.

“What made you talk to her again?” Cait asked.

“Well, Jayce got into contact with me. We'd kept in touch, but life got busy, y'know how it is.” He shrugged. “He told me that Vander had passed, and that Silco was dying, and they didn't know how long he had. Figure he thought I deserved the chance to say my goodbyes if nothing else.” He smiled at her. “That's when I got to meet Isha for the first time, though, so it wasn't all bad I suppose. But I guess you need a little context for that. This is all what Jayce and Vi told me after the fact. But, it seems like after we found out, a lot of shit changed.”

Chapter Text

Vi woke up to the sounds of knocking at her front door, her bedside clock reading ten in the morning. Powder was still asleep, so Vi rolled over, laid her arm over top of her, and decided to ignore it.

Another set of knocks came, and another, and Vi realized she wasn't going to get away with ignoring them.

She did her best to sneak out from the bed without waking Powder. She didn't bother putting on her pants, and went to the door. As her hand reached for the knob, she paused.

Powder had repeated so many times that the things the two of them did were a felony that it had almost lost its edge in Vi’s mind. But she heard another heavy set of knocks and realized that there was every possibility that the hand on the other side of the door could be cops. If Ekko or Cait had called the cops, reported what they'd seen, it was entirely possible they were there to haul the both of them off.

No, not both of them. Vi would be sure of that. She’d sell them a line about Powder being the helpless victim, Vi the perverted freak who assaulted her sister. It’d spare Powder jail, and Vi had been in the system once already, the cops probably wouldn't question it.

She took a breath and threw the door open, squinting against the piercing migraine and the bright light pouring in from the doorway.

Jayce and Viktor stood on the tiny rainbow welcome mat Powder had picked up the month prior for Pride. Vi sighed in relief only to immediately have a whole new batch of anxiety pop up. Jayce had more stubble than usual, having missed his morning shave and wearing a short sleeve button down that just screamed “Mel and Viktor picked this for him at the store” and a pair of jeans.

Viktor had his usual long button down, waist coat and slacks. Vi had never seen him out of it save the one time he got drunk and they'd compared scars. However, for once, he didn't look at her inquisitively, but with the kind of sad understanding Vi would’ve mistaken for pity from anyone else.

“Me and Mel got a couple pretty interesting phone calls last night.” Jayce said, sizing Vi up.

“Yeah? What’d they say?” Vi asked, her pink heart boxers doing little to shield her from the breeze.

“I think I want to hear your side of things first.” Jayce said with a soft smile. He held up a bag of fast food. “Breakfast?”

Vi looked at the bag, looked back at Jayce, then Viktor, and stood out of the way.

She closed and latched the door behind her, guiding the guys to the kitchen.

“Coffee?” Vi asked, grabbing the mocha pot.

“Sure.” Jayce said.

“Me as well.” Viktor said, settling into a seat with his crutch resting against his thigh.

They sat in silence while Vi prepped the pot and put it on the stovetop. She walked over to the kitchen sink, filling her hands with water and splashing her face, seeing some of it drip back red and brown from the dried blood.

“Is Ekko okay?” Vi asked as she dried her hands and face.

“He will be, I think.” Jayce said, scratching the back of his head. Vi nodded and sighed, pouring out two small mugs and setting them on the counter in front of her guests. She began refilling the pot.

“Cait?”

“Honestly, I don't know. Mel said she's already back at her family’s estate. I uh, I don't think she's coming back to town for school.” Vi dragged her hands down her face, feeling some of the scabbing on her brow strain.

“Fuck.” Vi said, tossing the refilled pot back on the burner.

“Ready to tell me your side of things, then?” Jayce asked.

“Baby?” Powder asked from the entryway to the kitchen, still rubbing sleep from her eyes. She had one of Vi’s tshirts on and not much else. She saw their guests and damn near jumped out of her skin. “S-shit, Jayce, Vik, n-nice to see you. I uh, was just-””-Sweetheart.” Vi interrupted what she was sure was about to be a very good excuse. “I'm just gonna tell them. Do you want coffee?”

Powder relaxed and nodded. “The usual, please. Okay if I get changed?”

“Go ahead. Mind grabbing me my sweats first?”

“Yeah.” She stepped out and Vi poured out another two mugs, walking to the fridge and grabbing a bottle of cola, popping the top off on her counter and pouring the contents in with the coffee.

“So it's true then?” Jayce asked, sipping his coffee. “You two are uh… together?”

“Yup.” Vi said, sipping the sweet, lukewarm mixture in her mug. It was nice to just be honest about it, and Vi didn't have the energy to lie any more. “Happened the night of Ekko’s send off. I didn't mean for it to play out like it did. But I mean, you gotta understand why I didn't exactly jump on a megaphone about it. The shit we’re doing is a felony in this state.” Jayce sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Shit… It’s been going on that long?” Jayce asked, a brow quirked. Vi nodded. “So the getting sober, quitting smoking, you getting better…” Powder walked into the kitchen with a pair of green sweats.

“All thanks to her.” Vi said, taking the pants with a thank you. Powder excused herself to the bathroom. Vi threw the sweats on there in the kitchen, finally no longer in just her boxers. “When she first came back, she would crash in my bed with me. Nothing romantic, just… like we used to when we were kids. I hadn't slept that well since back then. But the uh, the night of the concert, we were drunk, made out in the bathroom. I panicked and...” Vi gave a shrug as if that could bridge the gap.

“You decided to do damage control.” Viktor remarked, as if the missing piece to a puzzle had fallen in his lap. “Distanced yourself, whether physically or emotionally.”

“I guess you were right, Vik.” Jayce said. Vi snapped her head back and forth between the two men.

“You knew?”

“I'm amazed everyone didn't.” Viktor said, with a small chuckle. “Please, Vi, I don't mean to offend, but you are not exactly fit for a poker table. Your face is like a uh, movie, with subtitles.” Vi pinched the bridge of her nose.

“He told me his theories last night.” Jayce said. “I'll be honest, Vi, I had no idea.” Powder returned, baggy green shorts and a slightly less gargantuan one of Vi’s shirts on. Her face was washed and her hair pulled back. She took her mug from Vi and hopped onto the counter beside her. Vi felt her nails scratch along her back soothingly.

“Maybe that was for the best, Jayce-ball.” Powder said. “I'll be honest, if it wasn't for you teasing Vi about her dating history, I probably would've never put the pieces together. Never would have had the stomach to actually admit how I felt.” Powder admitted, sipping her coffee. She looked to Vi. “It's great, baby. Thank you.”

“Of course.” Vi took a sip of her own and looked at the boys. “For once, Jayce, I'm glad you didn't shut up.”

Jayce looked at them with bewildered entertainment.

“Well… okay then.” Jayce said with a sigh, downing the rest of his espresso.

“Okay?” Vi asked.

“Yeah, okay.” Jayce shrugged. “Vik, darling, anything to add?”

“No, I'm not surprised. However this does fill in a few snippets I had been missing. Besides, we don't exactly have much room to critique… outlandish arrangements, romantically.” Viktor looked to Powder. “I will say, Powder dear, you've done a wonderful job with her. I find her much less annoying now.” He said, fidgeting with his cane. “No offense, of course.”

“Wait, wait, wait, this doesn't make any fucking sense.” Vi set her mug down harder than she meant to. “Your throuple shit is a whole other ballpark from this. It’s minor league type scandal compared to us. What the fuck are you pulling?”

”Vi, why do you want this to be more difficult?” Jayce asked, brows knit in confusion.

“Because it can't possibly be this easy!” Vi snapped.

Because what did it mean if it was?

Powder rested a hand on her shoulder. Jayce, slowly and calmly, stepped up from his seat.

“Vi, I know I'm not Ekko, but I think of you as my family too. I wasn’t quiet about being afraid that I was gonna walk in here and find you dead from choking on your own puke, just like my old man.” He rested a hand on her shoulder. “Vi, it scared the fuck out of me. Genuinely.” He looks between her and Powder. “If this little… arrangement of yours is what you need to keep yourself from falling apart like that again, I don't care. My brother is happy, healthy, and alive. If there's gotta be some awkward adjustments, I'll take that over the alternative.” He paused for a minute, gauging her for a reaction. “Does that make it any better?”

Vi wrapped him in a hug. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” He hugged back. “I hope you know I love you.”

“I love you too, man.” He clapped her on the back.

“Powder, Hun. I'm sorry to say, Mel will take a bit more… convincing.” he said as the hug broke apart.

“I kinda figured.” Powder said, chewing her cheek. “Her and Cait were a lot closer.”

“She still cares about you, don't get me wrong. But, just… leave getting her to come around in my and Viktor’s hands. Give it some time, and I think we can convince her to give you guys a chance.” Jayce offered with the foolhardy confidence he said everything. It felt so strange to hear it in the context of the two of them.

“Thanks, man. I don't know what I'd do if I'd lost you in all of this too.”

“You're not lucky enough to be rid of me that easily.” He said with a laugh. He hung his arm over her shoulder, feeling the second skin clinging over her tattoo. He looked at it for a second, a somber tone falling over his face, before looking at her and giving his best attempt at a reassuring smile. “We’ll figure it all out. He's family.”

Viktor stood and moved over to Powder's side, his crutch clicking in the vinyl flooring. “And you're happy in all of this?”

“Yeah.” Powder said, her smile tired but no less loving. “Yeah, I really am. If I'm being honest, this was kind of what I wanted when I first came here. Obviously not like this, but… I love her. This is how that love feels best, feels right. I still don't understand why you're so… okay with all of this, Vikky-and-Vance.” Viktor sighed, slumping a bit and leaning against her.

“I… do not have long for this world, Powder dear. The doctors say if I make it another decade, it will be a miracle. I have much bigger things to worry about than whatever way you decide to find your comfort in another grown, consenting adult. Besides, life is too short to let the world hold you back from that which you love. I had my own journey with that, not too long ago.” He said simply, looking at Jayce like he held the world in his hands.

“Vik, I didn't know…” she put an arm over his shoulder, hugging him at her side.

“No, not many do. I don't enjoy talking to others about it. I loath pity. It is so fickle, so dismissive, and yet so many find it so quickly when they learn I’m ill.” he sighed and shook his head.

Jayce stepped in. “The treatment will take, Vik. Don’t give up on me yet.”

“Never.” Viktor said, smiling at Jayce so fondly.

Things settled as best they could. Vi was amazed that she didn't get thrown out of her job at the auto shop, but she and Loris ticked the days away as they ever did.

Vi didn't tell him about the updates in her life. He didn't ask, not about her dating life, or the little notes with hearts and doodles that started showing up in her lunches, or the Powder blue lipstick that would be smudged on the collar of her overalls.

He didn't ask, she didn't tell.

Powder and Sevika seemed to have a similar arrangement. When Powder started referring to her boyfriend with they instead of he, Sevika, shocking no one, couldn’t be bothered to give a fuck. Similarly when Powder’s boyfriend went from they to she.

That wasn’t to say they got stupid or careless. When they were out and about, they’d keep physical affection to a plausible deniability. Though even Vi could admit they pushed it a little. They'd stay close, Powder would lean against her at the bar or take her arm when they were walking around the town. In the fall they held hands out in the streets, figuring they could use the excuse of each other's warmth. When Powder had a drink or two she'd kiss Vi, but Vi made her best effort to ensure they didn't go making out in public.

But nobody’s perfect.

Mel eventually ended up back in their lives. Vi was sure it was only because of the very deliberate pressure from Jayce and Viktor. At first, she showed up when the 4 of them would go out for drinks. They made an effort to not be too blatant about things around her at first. Powder would sit by her, Vi would sit by Jayce, they’d cut away the night talking about work and school, life shit.

Didn't mean Vi wouldn't feel Powder's sneakers rubbing against her work boot under the table.

Then, Mel settled in a little more, and they did too. Powder would cuddle up against Vi at the bar, call her “babe” and “sweetheart”. They weren't bold enough to kiss around her at that point, but Vi remembered Powder kissing her cheek while they were standing at the bar away from everyone. Mel looked at Vi when they got back to their table and pointed to her own cheek. Vi was confused until she realized some of Powder’s lipstick had smudged on her. She wiped it away, and they didn't talk about it.

Progress?

Viktor and Vi actually started chatting in more than just passing as well. Viktor would rant about idiots in the administration at his university kneecapping his research budget, while Vi would go on raving about management at her shop cutting hours then complaining about their slow times on repairs. Vik asked her once how she liked taking her T from shots instead of gel, and Powder gave Vi unending shit for the fact that she hadn't given herself a shot in months.

What could she say, Powder was better at it than she was. She was gentle and delicate in a way Vi never really could figure out.

Vi found out in one of her and Vik’s bitch-sessions about their jobs that Viktor came from Zaun too. Such a small world.

Vik and Powder kept on happy as clams. He, Pow and Mel formed the strange trifecta that would turn any conversation into absolutely bloodthirsty gossipping. Vi and Jayce would sit there, nursing their drinks in utter horror at the cutthroat shit they would talk on this-or-that girl they all happened to know, or professor who had done one of them wrong. They heard them spill secrets on others that neither would have given up under torture.

Then Mel started coming around the apartment. They figured they could be more relaxed there. They'd give each other pecks and Powder would wear Vi’s clothes when they were comfortable. Powder would curl up with Vi on the loveseat, and there was more than one occasion where they'd fall asleep like that, their friends conversing around them, music humming in the background. It was a night just like that, late that next summer, when she got a call.

She pulled her phone out and stepped out onto the stairs. “Hey, dad, what's up?” Vi answered without even thinking.

“Violet, dear boy, I need to ask a favor of you and your sister.” Silco said, his voice sounded tired and a bit hoarse.

“Anything.” Vi said, leaning against the rail.

“There's some things we need to discuss, the four of us. I think it's best done face-to-face. Is there any way you two could come out to stay with us for a few days.”

“Yeah, yeah I think we could pull that off. I uh, I think we have a few life updates it might be good to talk over in person as well. Give me a couple days for us to get things put together? I could probably swing next weekend with my work if I pull some strings.”

“That’s perfect. I have appointments all through the rest of this week, and Vander is taken most of next.” Silco coughed off mic, slow and barking. “Violet, I am afraid I need to step away, apologies for the abruptness. But I wanted to say… I hope you know how proud I am of the man you've grown into. No matter what happens, whatever may change… please know that I care for you and your sister deeply, as if you were my own blood, and I will always wish the best for you.”

“I love you too, dad.” Vi chuckled into the microphone. He didn't chuckle back, then the line went quiet.

Two weeks later, they loaded up their bags into VI's beat to hell old truck and took it out on a drive to New Jersey.

“Well, small mercies-” Powder said from the passenger seat. She had her back against the door, her legs stretched out, resting across VI's lap. “At least if we get caught here, it’s legal.”

Vi chuckled and shook her head. “I would really rather not have Vander or Silco catch us. I've been walked in on mid-fuck enough for one lifetime.” Powder laughed and it made Vi smile. She rested a hand on Powder’s leg, just above the knee. Her fingers rested in the soft blue plaid of her skirt, her thumb idly toying with the fraying edge of a tear in her tights.

“So we're really doing this? Telling them?” Powder asked, looking over the rim of her sunglasses.

“Yup.” Vi sighed out. She felt Powder’s hand on hers, a thumb running gently over her scarred knuckles. “If shit’s gonna bite us in the ass, I'd rather it be for being honest.” Vi looked to Powder and tried her best at a reassuring smile. “Plus, I don't really know if we were ever actually capable of being subtle.”

“I think if anyone will accept us, it's Silco and Vander. They'll understand what you mean to me.” She placed a kiss on Vi's knuckles.

“I hope you're right, but I'm ready if not.”

The road swept away past them, the sun hanging low on the horizon thanks to a late start that had been caused by the two of them being “distracted” post-shower. The whole sky was painted in long pink streaks at the furthest edge of the horizon, the higher portions of the sky swimming in soft blues, with the gaps in between full of a million different hues against the white clouds. The radio played quietly in the back, thrumming some beat from a song off Powder’s phone thanks to some contraption she had stuffed in Vi’s cigarette lighter. Wasn't like Vi was using it for anything else.

Powder fidgeted with one of her braids, staring at Vi for a minute. “Did you ever go to school dances growing up?” She finally asked.

“Not really. Like, I went to a couple, but usually I just ended up getting into a fight or some shit before I could really do anything.”

“Damn, that bad?”

“Middle school dances in assfuck Idaho? Yeah, no those aren't very fag-inclusive.” Vi said with a chuckle.

“Ironic given the name.” Vi rolled her eyes.

“I had a kid start shit with me after he thought I tried making out with his girlfriend, the stupid fuck.”

“Oh… you totally tried, didn't you?” Powder asked with a chuckle.

“No, I did not try.” Vi replied haughtily, flicking a grin in Powder’s direction. “I succeeded.” Powder rolled her eyes.

“You're incorrigible.”

“What can I say, she was a very sweet girl. Reminded me a lot of you, not that I'd made that connection at the time.”

“God, I'm in love with a fucking dork.” Powder shook her head. “I never really went to dances much either. Contrary to popular belief, those big fancy schools don't have big galas every other week. Plus, when they would, I was usually in trouble for some shit at home so I almost never got to actually, you know, go.”

They went quiet for a while, a new song started, then another. Powder leaned her head back against the window and closed her eyes.

“When I was older, after I started figuring everything out, I would think about us at a dance together sometimes.” She admitted, head rocking to the side and back in time with the music. “You'd be there in a little vest and tie, and ask me if I wanted to dance. You'd spend all night spinning me around the dance floor, until we were both so dizzy we had to cling to each other to keep upright.” Powder opened her eyes just slightly, looking at Vi through her eyelashes. Vi rubbed her thumb along Powder’s knee.

“Really?”

“Mhmm.” Powder admitted. “I also thought about way dirtier shit that we'd do afterward, but that felt a lot less lovey dovey to talk about.” Vi cackled and slapped her thigh.

“Oh my fucking God, and you're calling me a dork?” Vi asked with a shake of her head. Powder chuckled and just kept watching Vi drive.

“You think we could've gone to a dance together? In another timeline where shit didn't turn into such a nightmare?”

“Well, either you'd’ve been coming to my prom at like 15 or I would have been 21 coming to yours. So probably not. I'll take a lot of risks for you, babygirl, but yeah no, not messing around with the age of consent.”

“Oh boo you.”

“Boo?! I feel like that should be like, the least boo-able thing in the fucking world, you little shit!” Vi said with another smack to her leg.

“I'm trying to be all romantical and shit, and you're just absolutely fucking me over. Boo. No pussy for you.” She crossed her arms and stuck her nose up.

She cracked three seconds later and started laughing so hard Vi worried she was going to piss herself.

They got to the little neighborhood on the outskirts of the city with maybe half an hour of sunlight left. Vander was sat out on the front porch in an old rocking chair, a big grin plastered on his face.

“Well you kiddos sure took your sweet time. Had me worried this old rustbucket had finally broken down on you.” He chuckled, hauling himself out of the chair. His face was worn with old scars and fresh wrinkles, his hair filled with greys that hung loose to his chin.

“Blame Powpow. She slept in.” Vi lied as she hopped out of the truck, ignoring the glare Powder gave her out of the corner of her eye.

Okay, so maybe Vi was the one who started their little “distraction”. She certainly hadn't heard any complaints from Powder. There was a lot of screaming, but not the complaining kind.

“Well, I suppose a little rest is alright.” Vander said, tussling Powder’s hair.

“Hey, my braids! Vanderrrrrr!” She whined, crossing her arms and pouting up at the beast of a man.

“Alright, alright. No need to give me the puppy dog eyes.” Vander grumbled, pulling her into a hug. “I can't believe you're finally home.”

“I missed you both so much. The calls have been nice, but it's just not the same.” Pow said, doing her best to wrap her arms around the absolute bear of a man.

He held one arm out for Vi, who joined in the small group hug.

“I'm glad we could get you two out here finally. Shouldn’t’ve taken us this long after all these years of waiting.”

“You guys are busy, and we had… life stuff we were figuring out. We understand.” Powder assured.

“Well, I'm just glad you're here now. I’ll let Silk know that you two are here.” Vander looked at her. “What’s this old thing?” he asked, flicking the collar of the battered old denim jacket Vi had on. It had seen better days, but the denim was sturdy, even if the space where the sleeves used to be were ragged.

“It's called a vest, pops, don't tell me you're finally going senile on me?” Vi asked, punching him in the arm. He chuckled but cut it off quickly.

“You look like the punks we used to keep on pickets to fight off scabs.” Vander said, resting a hand on her shoulder. “Makes sense, seeing as your old man was one of em.”

Vi felt her smile go so wide she worried it'd split her lip. “Thanks, pops.” He looked a little solemn, still trying to keep his own smile on.

“Of course. C'mon, let's get you two set up. Got your rooms all dusted and ready. Beds may be a bit small, but if all else fails one of you can pull out the couch bed.”

“There's a couch bed?” Vi asked, remembering Jayce just sleeping on the sofa.

“Yup! We've had it for near a decade now.” Vander said. Vi grabbed her and Powder’s bags from the back of the truck, and made a note to never tell Jayce that fact.

They walked in and Vi set their bags at the base of the stairs, seeing Silco at the kitchen counter. An old, grey in the mouth mut scittered excitedly along the vinyl and crashed into Vi’s legs. He barked at her excitedly as she dropped to her knees to pet him. “Oh who's a good boy! Who's a good boy!” Vi said, the old hound flopping over and letting her pet at his belly.

Vander walked, slow and lumbering, over to the seat beside his husband. Silco’s hair was shorter than it had been last time she'd seen him, only a couple of inches. What had grown back had thinned some, and greyed a lot more. He was pale and scrawny, even for him, but his smile was just as bright as he stood to walk to Violet. When she stood from her fun with the mutt, he cupped her face in his hands, giving her a once over. He smiled at the end of it.

“Goodness, boy, look at the sight of you. Had me thinking some stranger was stumbling in to harass my dog.” He said, letting his grip on her face go and patting her on the shoulder. “You look well, Violet.”

“Thanks, dad.” Vi said, pulling him in to a hug. He hesitated, but returned it after a moment, and he hung on a few beats longer after Vi let go. “You doing okay? You look like you've seen better days.”

“Oh don't mind that now.” He assured, turning his attention to her sister. “Powder, darling, you're absolutely radiant! The spitting image of your mother.”

Jinx all but tackled him in her arms, the two flopping onto the floor. “Shit, Silco are you okay?” She asked. Vander shot up in his chair, concern written on his face in big bold letters. But Silco just chuckled, sitting up, giving her an awkward little hug on the floor.

“I’m wonderful, dear. God you haven’t changed a bit.” He chuckled, coughing into the crook of his arm as Powder stood back up. She offered him her hand and he took it, accepting her help off the floor. “Well, I suppose you do have more tattoos now.”

“Haha, yeah.” Powder beamed, sliding her jacket off to show her full sleeve of clouds.

“God above, young lady, how much money did you put in your skin?” Vander asked with a chuckle, settling in beside Silco, a supportive hand on his lower back. They exchanged a glance.

“Only a couple hundred at first. A lot of these I ended up trading for with some of the other artists in my shop. You know, they add a cloud, I do some designs of theirs.”

“Ah, how’s Sevika fairing these days? She's awful at returning my calls.” Silco muttered the last bit.

“She’s got a massive stick up her ass, but she's working it out slowly but surely.”

Vander barked out a laugh that felt like it could shake the earth.

“Glad to see some things never change.” Vander said.

“Now, let's not start all this again.” Silco was swiftly ignored.

“Oh come off it, Silk. You just liked her cus she was your little mini me. You two could've cracked diamonds with how hard assed you were back in the day.” Vander prodded Silco teasingly. “I could never get them apart. Swear to God, I thought she was gonna create a cult devoted to you.”

“She was a committed trade unionist and wanted to learn how one does the work.” Silco retorted. “I knew you were always jealous.”

“Jealous my ass. She scared me. She did talk pretty good shit when off the clock, though. Once heard a man call her a cunt, she told him she was amazed he knew what one looked like. I think he quit the next week.” Vander shook his head.

“Oh that hasn’t changed. She called Vi a mopey bitch-boy once when she was at the shop for a tattoo.” Powder said with a chuckle.

“She did?” Vi asked.

“Shit, that might have been after you left…” Powder feigned innocence, before giving Vi a shit-eating grin that made Vi want to kiss her then and there. Instead, she cleared her throat as Vander started talking.

“Well now, Vi you didn’t tell me you had work too. Let’s see it lad!” Vander prodded. Vi slid her vest and flannel off, tossing it onto the kitchen table before hiking up her tank top and shedding it to show her back. “Christ, boy. Do you want some skin with your ink?” He said with a chuckle. “It’s beautiful. Sevika’s good at her craft, I'll give her that.”

“Hey, that's my work, thank you very much.” Powder harrumphed, crossing her arms and marching over to stand by Vi.

“You did all that?”

“Yeah, like a year ago.” Powder said, prodding Vi with her elbow. “This whiny asshole couldn't hold still half the time. The fact it all came out straight is a miracle.”

Vi rolled her eyes. “We're not having this argument again. Maybe next time I willget a tattoo from Sevika.”

“Oh you wouldn't fucking dare if you know what's good for you.”

“Children, children, let's settle down.” Silco said, shaking his head with a grin and a chuckle. “How about we get something delivered and turn in for the evening. There's a lovely little Chinese takeaway. I'll order us something to eat, and we can catch up on everything.”

They all agreed, and a few minutes later Silco paced around the kitchen, phone in between his ear and his shoulder, as Vander settled in on a cushy loveseat while Powder and Vi took seats on the couch. There was respectable distance between them, until Powder set her back against the armrest and plopped her legs in Vi's lap.

Plausible deniability?

Vander didn't make much of it, settling into his seat, stretching his arm along the back. “So, how's life been? How's Jayce? Ekko?”

Vi swallowed and scratched the back of her head. “Jayce is good. He's uh, he's got some really good folks in his life now. A woman named Mel and a guy named Viktor. They’re good to him and he seems to be doing really well with their support.” Vi said. Vander gave her the raised-dad-eyebrow, clearly picking up on her lack of answer to half of his question. Silco walked in as Vander spoke up.

“And Ekko?” He looked between the two of them and Vi felt guilt impale her in the chest for the thousandth time. It was a familiar blade, and sunk in ever deeper. Powder sighed and spoke while Vi was still trying to find her words.

“We had a… falling out last year.” Silco settled in beside Vander, concern clear on his face.

“A falling out with Ekko?” Vander said it like they'd just said they saw a unicorn. “What the fuck happened?”

Vi lamented internally, they really weren't even going to get a little bit of time to enjoy themselves? She looked to Powder who tried to give a reassuring smile.

“Maybe it’s better saved for another time.” Silco intervened, a hand resting on Vander’s knee. “The kids are just getting in from a long drive. We can talk about life and… drama later.”

Silco was a saint.

“I s’pose that's best. You’re young. It’ll all work itself out with time.” Vander offered.

“I hope so.” Vi admitted, worrying her thumb along the inside of her palm.

“Well, then. Tell us, how is Caitlyn doing, then?” Silco asked. Vi looked at her boots, not seeing Powder shake her head no to her side. “Or, well, how's the shop? You're still working with cars, yes?”

“Yeah, the shop is good. Loris is good. He's gotten the managers position which is nice. Means they’re off my ass, finally” Vi said, settling back a bit.

“And Powder, how's the tattoo business working for you? Sevika teaching you well?”

“Always.” Powder beamed. “That woman makes sure I never get a moment's peace.” Vi never understood just how Powder was able to play the part so well.

“Why do I have the distinct feeling that the opposite is the truth?” He asked with a chuckle.

“Pshh, what could you possibly mean? I'm a saint. Ain't that right, Vivi?” Powder kicked her in the leg with a smile that screamed “c'mon, cheer up and stop being weird.”

“Yeah, saint of almost burning the apartment down every time you try to cook.” Vi chuckled, trying to relax.

“Oh I do not!”

“You absolutely do. You caused a grease fire last week!”

“That's a completely reasonable possibility when cooking!”

“You were trying to cook toast!” Vi said, poking Powder in the forehead.

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” Powder said, chucking a pillow at Vi’s head. Vander and Silco chuckled. “At least I don't almost burn the apartment down every winter cus I can't remember to turn the radiator off!”

“Fuck you, that happened 2 times!”

“You singed my favorite shark plush! You burned the fucking blahaj!”

“Oh come on, I bought you a new one!”

“It's not the same and you know it.” Powder harrumphed, her arms crossing as she turned her nose up.

“Glad to see nothing has changed since you two were little.” Vander chuckled, shaking his head at their little argument.

“Not true, they've gotten much louder.” Silco said, leaning into Vander.

“Ah, too true. Reminds me of Felicia and Connol.” Vander mused.

“I suppose apples and trees.”

Vi felt something squirm in her chest at the idea of her and Powder resembling their parents. It didn't feel unpleasant, but it felt so very strange. Her and Powder’s eyes met, and Vi was greeted with the sight of nothing but pride in blue eyes.

“What were Mom and Dad like?” Powder asked, fidgeting with her braids.

“They we're honest folks. It shows in how you kids came up. Hard working, no nonsense. They were also the most insufferably lovey dovey people I ever had the good graces of meeting.” Vander said fondly.

“Preposterously so. Though perhaps our frame of reference was a bit warped given the time period. We are far more open now. I'm sure if us back then could see us now, we'd say similar about ourselves.” Silco pondered, his hand on Vander’s knee.

“Oh we are nothing compared to those two.” Vander said. “God above, they were like a Hallmark movie. Couldn't be subtle for the life of em. Always had to be touching, or cuddling, or talking about eachother. Connel took one look at your mother and I swear his eyes’d become big ol hearts like a fuckin looney toon.” Vander shook his head, long lost memories seeming to dredge up from the depths. “Once, I tell yah, he found out your mother wasn't feeling well. Keep in mind he was probably 16-17 at the time, she was several years older than him. So he brings her a bouquet of flowers right to her door, knocks, and when she trudges up in some sweatpants and slippers, he stutters like a jackass and tells her “you're the most beautiful person in the world”.” Vander can't help but cackle. He nudged Silco with his elbow. “He worked that line over the entire 45 minutes drive to your apartment, too.”

“Did he really? I had thought he was just stunned in the moment.” Silco chuckled.

“Wait, you two were there?” Vi asked.

“Of course we were! Your father and I grew up together. That dumb son of a bitch didn't leave my side from the day we could walk. I'm the one who fuckin drove him to the apartment.” Vander explained. “Dumb bastard didn't have a car.”

“Felicia and I were classmates in highschool. We got along extremely well, and had just moved in together for uni. I was on the couch when your father came knocking.”

“Wait, then why didn't you answer the door?” Powder asked.

“Because, your father annoyed me. He had his little crush on her since our senior year. He was the silly freshman crushing on an upperclassman, and he was her problem to deal with.” Silco said with a chuckle. “Your mother took the flowers and told him “kick rocks and come back when you’re legal”. Which I thought was both extremely comical and the proper response. However she did keep the flowers. Put them in a little vase on the kitchen table until they started to wilt. Then she hung them up in the pantry to dry.”

“Oh if he'd’ve known about any of that he would've been even more insufferable.” Vander lamented, resting his elbow on the arm of the loveseat and his head in his hand. “He would track the god damn days until his 18th. Had a little notepad he'd cross out every day on.”

“No, you have to be lying.” Silco said, leaning out to look at Vander.

“Swear on my life. The boy counted down every single day.” Silco dipped back into him.

“Such a ridiculous lad.” Silco chuckled and shook his head. “Then again you were rather ridiculous when we first met as well.”

“How the hell do you mean? I was a bag of charm and physique.”

“Oh I’ve got to hear this.” Vi said, only to be slapped in the arm.

“Shut up, first I wanna hear how mom and dad got together!” Powder said.

“Well, those aren't exactly seperate stories.” Vander admitted. “Like I said, your father and I were basically inseparable, and the son of a bitch never thought to buy himself a car. So, the day after he turns 18, he calls my house and begs me to give him a lift to her apartment. The man didn't consider for literally a second that this woman might have moved on, or fuck it, moved period! No, he decides in the middle of winter that he's gonna go to her apartment out of nowhere, years since they've last seen each other let alone talked, and ask her to go out with him.” Vander shook his head and chuckled. “So the crazy bastard has me drive him over, and miracle of miracles, it turns out they're still living there. They're having a little holiday party, even. So he walks up and stands there at the door for damn near fifteen minutes in the blistering cold, working up the guts to knock. He doesn't even have a winter coat on, just this old blanket-lined denim monstrosity he called a jacket.”

“No wonder the boy was so pale when he came in.” Silco noted idly, more to himself than anyone else.

“Well, finally he saunters up and knocks, and she answers it and just seems dumbfounded to even see him there. They just stand there, gawking at each other for a while. I don't know what the hell he said, but she invited him in to the party.” Vi chuckled and looked over, seeing a strange blush on Powder’s cheeks, her gaze down and off to the side. “He asked if I could come in too. God only knows why, cus I was ready to drive my ass home and leave him there to freeze, I was so fuckin cold, and she goes “to hell with it, why not”.”

“Thank god she did.” Silco said, squeezing Vander’s knee. “I still remember that silly little vest you wore the first time I saw you. All black leather with that silly Cerberus on the back.” Silco looked at them both. “He looked like some sort of beatnick Fabio with his hair grown out back then.”

“Hey, leave that vest out of this. I still have it. It's a quality piece of leather. Besides, that's all rich coming from you mister “wore nothing but women's jeans and tank tops the entire first year we were dating”.” Vander shook Silco as he teased him. “Looked like you were plannin’ to run for Miss Twink USA.” He looked to Powder. “Sevika ever tell you how she and Silco met?” If possible Silco looked even paler.

“Vander, no!” He said harshly.

“Tell me, tell me, tell me!” Powder squealed.

“We’re standing at this shitty little dive bar, years after all this. It was the type of spot folks like us could be comfortable in. Well Sevika, feeling rather comfortable after a few rum and cokes, walks up behind him, slaps him on the ass, and goes “hey there babygirl, feelin like a ride tonight?”” Vander howls with laughter as Silco drags a hand down his face.

“She's going to kill you for telling that story. She told you she would.” Silco remarked like he was commenting on the weather, and Vander still looked a little afraid.

Lying, Vander said “I'm not scared of her. That's the honest truth.”

“Well, get back to the actual story!” Vi prodded, even as Powder typed something on her phone and hit send.

“Not much more to tell, really. All I know is that your parents spent most the rest of the night catching up with each other, and when I was starting to get ready to leave, he was nowhere to be found and neither was she.” Vander said with a chuckle. “Lucky it played out like that, too. Cus while I was looking for him outside, a certain someone sauntered out after me and asked me for my number.”

“Never did end up getting that from you.” Silco joked.

“Yeah, cus I never left that damned apartment without you by my side. Except for work, I suppose.” Vander shot back.

“Not true. You left to get your things a few weeks later.”

“Right, cus someone was too precious to carry boxes.” Vander teased.

“Mom and dad never told us about any of that.” Vi said, shaking her head.

“Not exactly the type of story you tell your kids, at least not til they're older.” Vander said. Silco chuckled, before bursting out in a coughing fit. He pulled a pocket square free from his waist coat and coughed into it. The red fabric came away damp.

“Jeez, Silky, you doing okay?” Powder asked, sitting up and pulling her legs out of Vi’s lap. Silco looked down at the kerchief and back at them, and sighed in resignation. He tucked it back into his waistcoat and looked to Vander, who nodded back.

“Children, I'm sorry, but I think we have to dampen the mood slightly.” Silco said, sitting forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “There's something Vander and I have to ask of you. It's not something small, but a true sacrifice, and I feel there are things you ought to know before you make a decision. It's only fair.”

“What’s going on, Dad?” The title made Silco flinch, shame inching across his weathered features. Vander set a hand on Silco’s back, rubbing gently.

“Violet, Powder… Your parents were always dear friends to us. Ekko’s Uncle Benzo was as well.” It was Vi’s turn to flinch in shame. “The five of us, at your ages, were inseparable. When we made plans for the future, they always seemed to include each other. I truly considered your parents family, even when we had nothing like blood tying us together. When you two were born, you were as much our children as your parents, when Ekko came under Benzo’s care, we all took him under our wing. We swore that if anything ever happened, those of us who remained on this earth would ensure the wellbeing of you all.”

“We know all this already, Silky. Why bring this up now?” Powder asked, her hand reaching for Vi’s without thinking as her body wound tighter in anxiety. Vi didn't pull away, running her thumb along Powder’s knuckles.

“Because your parents' death is my fault.” Silco admitted, his eyes moving from the floor, finally, to meet their gaze. Fear, shame, guilt all carved into every wrinkle and scar that time had worn onto his face far too young. Vi realized if Vander and Silco were the same age as their parents, that would put them in their late 40s at most.

“W-what?” Vi asked, Powder's fingers crushing the bones in her hand.

“When I was your age, I was a young upstart, trying to rise through the ranks of my union. I wanted to help people, to do something that would really change people’s lives. But… well, it was a different time. People like Vander and I, like you children, were pushed out of life in so many ways.”

Vander sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “Back then, watching your friends die was just part of the life. AIDS ate our neighborhoods alive. Saw a lot of good men and women wither away to nothing, all because of bad luck. The lucky ones had family to mourn em. Most of us… we were all we had. You'd lose someone in the morning, and by night their whole apartment would be ransacked, families taking anything they could to erase the memory of their kid being some degenerate fag… Most folks assumed that just being around us could get them sick, or thought we deserved it.”

Silco took Vander’s hand, a thumb running along scarred knuckles. “The union was better than a lot of places. Not perfect, but things were hard fought, and they had to accept whatever help they could get. I wanted to do what no one else was willing to risk. I took every opportunity I could get. When the union told me they needed me to organize one of the few new mines opening in the States, I jumped at the chance. Your parents, God bless them both, agreed to help me. They'd done the work before, they wanted to support me.” Silco seemed to lose steam, words failing him. Vander squeezed his hand.

“C'mon Silk, nowhere to go but forward.” Vander assured.

“...You two were so young. You, your parents, Vander, everyone went to Zaun because of me. They packed up their lives and moved into that godforsaken building to help me try to unionize the mines. It was slow, years of hard work, I got desperate to have results, and, well, I got sloppy. One of the people I trusted turned out not to be trustworthy, and reported me… I expected to be fired, instead someone broke in the window to our apartment and threw something in. I think it was fireworks, just meant to scare me away and signal that they knew who I was and where I lived. I don't think they meant to kill, but whatever it was that they threw in… the carpet went up in flames so quickly. Before I could even realize what was going on, the whole apartment was burning. I tried pulling the alarms, but they didn't work. We'd been telling management for years, and it never got addressed. I tried to scream, but the smoke was so thick…” Tears trickled down his cheeks, but his eyes never left them. He refused to look away even as their horror and heartbreak became more and more visible. “I… I'm so sorry. Everything that happened, the fire, them being there to begin with, everything you children have suffered since then… It’s my fault. I tried to make up for it however I could, but could never make it right, could never fix what I'd broken.”

“It's on both of us, Silk. We both took the gig salting.” Vander tried to comfort as best he could.

Vi squeezed Powder’s hand, looking at her. Powder let go, and Vi stood. Silco, finally broken, looked down at the ground between his feet.

“Vi…” Vander and Powder said in unison, not moving from their spots on the couch. Vi didn't respond, walking around the table to stand in front of Silco. He didn't move, still looking down, a man awaiting the executioner’s blade.

“Stand up.” Vi whispered, it was all she could manage to push out without her voice cracking. He looked up at her, and did as had been asked of him.

“Violet, I…” He choked out, as Vi pulled him into her arms.

He pulled her close, thin, wirey arms clinging to her with everything he had as she did everything she could to avoid sobbing into his chest. A hand settled on the back of her head, cradling it.

“I don't blame you.” She managed to strangle out. His cheek rested against her head, as she felt her scalp wet from the tears on his cheeks.

“I don't either.” Powder wrapped her arms around them both. Vi pulled Powder closer, and Vander added his arms around the three of them.

“Thank you.” Silco whispered.

“Of course.” Powder assured.

“You're our dads.” Vi choked out, finally breaking completely, sobbing into the fabric of his waistcoat. He stroked her hair.

“If the only trace I ever left on this earth was the two of you, I could not be prouder. Nothing could ever change that. I hope you both know that. I know we could never give you a home to grow up in like we wanted, but I want you both to know that this home we stand in now is yours. Your names have been on its title since you were children. No matter what happens, this house is yours when…” he couldn't finish his sentence.

They stood there, wrapped together in a mess of limbs and tears, choked sobs and bittersweet love. Eventually, Powder and Vi calmed, their sobbing quieted, and they pulled away.

“You said you had something to ask.” Powder pointed out, wiping smeared mascara and tears from her cheeks.

“I do…” he sighed, wiping his own cheek with his pocket square.

“We both do.” Vander corrected, hands on his hips. “The mines in Zaun… the levels of radiation in them were completely against regulations. It bled into the watershed, into the soil..the whole town was poison. No one outside management had any idea until well after the fire brought investigations into the town.”

“Your father and I are ill. Cancer, likely from the mines. I've been dealing with it for some time, but Vander had scans turn up positive last week. The doctors assured us that, with treatment, we should have long lives ahead of us. This won't kill us, I give you my word.” He tried to assure them.

He didn't realize he was lying.

“With both of us dealing with treatment, however, managing things around the house, appointments, and everything else may be difficult. We were hoping… perhaps you two might move in to help us? I know it's sudden, but we're close to the city, which I have to imagine would be good business for Powder, and I know a shop in town who would be happy to hire Vi. We know it's a lot to ask, but-”

“We’ll do it.” they said in unison.

Silco and Vander looked amazed. “If you need time to think it over-”

“No.” Vi said, looking to Powder for reassurance. She received exactly as she needed. Vi caught that old white cat, Clouds, sat in front of the sliding glass back door as the old mutt played in the back yard, a pane of glass separating them.

“You're family. If we don't look after each other, who does?” Powder offered. “But… there's something we need to tell you.” She looked to Vi then, who swallowed the frog in her throat as she faced the terror of what could come. She looked at Vander and Silco, then back to Powder.

A thud hit the back door, and Vi looked to see a dazed hound recovering from running into the glass.

“I'm so sorry kids.” Vander mumbled, shooing Clouds away from the glass door. “Damn dog never can stop chasing her.” The old mutt stood, eyes opening to reveal a freshly popped blood vessel in one side.

Vi swallowed the terror and took Powder’s hand. The two stepped back from Vander and Silco.

“Dad, Pop… we…” Vi began, floundering for her words until Powder gave her hand a squeeze, speaking up.

“We're together.” Powder confessed. “Not like… like when we were kids. Like you two. Like… like our parents.”

The world stopped, and if a pin dropped in the next county over it could've been heard in that room.

Vi could feel the blood pounding in her veins, feel her heart thudding so hard in her chest that it felt like it intended to crack through her ribs and pour out onto the ground at her feet.

Vander’s eyes traveled back and forth between the two of them. With every pass he seemed more concerned, more angry, more guilty.

He made a step toward them, and Powder dropped Vi’s hand, putting her arm out in front of Vi, stepping between them.

Vander stopped, his eyes settling on Powder, distrust and shame evident in equal measure.

“I wasn't trying to…” he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. After a moment, Vander and Silco exchanged a glance, and Vander looked to Vi.

“Violet, can I speak to you outside? Alone.” Vander finally said. Powder and Vi exchanged a look, fear written clear on Powder’s expression. Vi took her hand again and squeezed it. Powder, hesitatingly, trusted her.

“Sure.” Vi said. She walked to the door, Vander joining her, and they stepped out into the dark porch, a flickering bare bulb the only light.

Vander was stiff and lumbering. He ran a hand through his weathered, greying hair. “Christ above.” He muttered, already pacing the porch. Vi leaned back against the railing. She could feel the pocket knife in her back pocket taunting her. She pressed the palms of her hands into her eyes until she saw stars. “I just… how in the hell does something like this happen? Actually don't tell me. I don't think I want to know.” He shook his head. “I… God forgive me for my failure, this is at least consensual, right?” He finally asked, looking her in the eyes. “No one is doing anything against their will?”

Vi immediately shot up. “Of course not! Or, I mean of course it… God fucking, of course it's consensual! What the fuck do you take me for?! If you think I'd ever try to force Powder to-” Vander put his hand on her shoulder, stopping her dead.

“Powder isn't the one I'm worried about, Vi. You are.” Vander said quietly. “I just want to make sure you're not being forced to do something you don't want.” Vi stared at him in confusion.

“W-what?” She stuttered out. “No! Powder would never. She couldn't, even if she tried.”

“I'm not saying she's putting a gun to your head, boy! God damnit, I know I haven't been around as much as I should have, it'll haunt me til the day I die. But I was there the days you and her were born, Vi. I saw you two every day from then til the fire. You never were able to say no to her and I highly doubt all those years separated helped that. Just, for the love of all that's holy, tell me the truth. Are you doing this because you want to, or because you're afraid of losing her?”

Vi didn't need to think. “I love her, pops. I know it's not how I'm supposed to, but it's the only thing in my God damned life that's actually felt nice in a long time. I feel… whole. Like I'm not chasing some missing part of me anymore. God, Vander, I'm sober! I haven't smoked in over a year, I sleep well, I eat well. I'm doing good, really good, and that's all because of her.”

“Christ, a year? That's how long this has been going on?” Vander asked. Vi sighed and shook her head, turning her back to Vander. “What the fuck do you want from me, Vi? It's your God damn sister. You two should-” Vi wheeled around.

“What? Hate each other? Barely be able to stand being in the same room together like some fucking sitcom? Annoy the shit out of each other and barely hang out except on the holidays?”

“That's not what real family is like.” Vander tried to intervene, but Vi cut him off again.

“How the fuck would I know that!?! Last time I had a normal family I was 6 years old and they went up in fucking smoke!”

“What about Ekko? Jayce? How many times have you called those boys your brothers. Gonna fuck them next?”

“It's not the same!”

“Why not?”

“I don't fucking know!” Vi slammed her fist into the support beam to her side. The awning shuddered above them and Vi panted, looking down at torn, bloodied knuckles on a hand that hurt like hell. “I don't know why. I don't know if something broke in me back in New York, or if I was always going to turn out this fucked up, or if I'm just some selfish asshole. And I don't care! I’m happy, Vander. I'm happy with her, in a way I've never managed to be happy and have it actually work out before. And she's happy with me. Can't that just be enough? Can't you just be happy that I'm not trying to chase myself into the fucking gave anymore?” Vander sighed and shook his head.

“Of course I'm happy about that, boy! It's the sister-fucking I have a problem with.”

“Guess what, those two aren't separate.” Vi said, stuffing her still-blody hands into her pockets. Vander shook his head and put his hands up in surrender.

“I got the answers I needed. I just wanted to be sure you were safe.” His arms flopped at his sides. “I just… for the love of God, try and keep your hands to yourselves when I'm around.” He took a breath, then another, and another. Vi saw his posture slacken a bit. “I… I understand if this means you don't want to move in, but there's no God damned way you two are sharing a bed while you're here. I know you're coming to help us, but I just… for my own sake.”

Vi sighed and shook her head. “Of course we're still helping. I… you're family. I want to help.” Vander looked at her, really sizing her up, and sighed.

“You know I love you, right? I just… I'm just trying to make sure you're not making a mistake.”

“I love you too. I get it, but I don't think I am.”

Vander paced around a bit more. “She's on her meds, right? This isn't some… psychotic episode?”

“She never had psychotic episodes.” Vi corrected, bitterness boiling in her blood at the thought of the Foxworth’s doctor-shopping. “She's been going to therapy every week the whole time she's lived with me. I go monthly. Her therapist knows about her feelings, even if not about the fact she's… acting on them. They got her on meds that actually help her, and yes, she takes them regularly, exactly as prescribed. I'm not a fucking monster.”

“God dammit boy, stow the fucking villain complex. I’m not trying to say you are. I just want to be sure.”

“Then ask whatever you want. But I'm asking you to just give us a chance.”

“I’m sorry, kiddo. I don't know if I can.” Vander admitted, shrugging his shoulders, his hands settling in his pockets.

“Well, I'll give you time to figure out, then.” Vi offered. Vander’s lips curled into a small, tired smile.

“Just as fucking stubborn as your father, the both of you.” They stood there, in the quiet dark, bare light bulb buzzing above them, until Vander chuckled. “I can’t believe you're still driving that pile of rust and bolts.”

Vi chuckled, looking at her truck. “Of course. Pretty sure that jalopy will outlive us all.”

Vander laughed at that, and pulled Vi into a hug from the side. He kissed the side of her head and tussled her hair. “Don't go jinxing it, she'll fall apart on you tomorrow. Suppose you already knocked on wood though, huh?”

“Suppose so.” Vi chuckled, looking at her bloodied hand.

“Let's get inside. It's cold as all hell out here.”

“It’s summer.”

“End of, and I’m an old man.”

“Oh you wouldn't last a day in Michigan.”

“Why do you think we never visit?” She pulled away and punched him in the arm, and the two chuckled as they walked through the door. Silco and Powder stood in the kitchen, sipping from mugs.

“See, I told you they'd be fine.” Silco said to Powder as they stepped in. She had worry carved into every feature, but it settled some when she saw them laughing. She still ran over the second she saw Vi’s hands.

“For God's sake, what did you do?” She asked, taking Vi's hand in both of hers, looking at the bloodied knuckles.

“Got into a bad fight with a support beam.” Vi admitted.

“Dad, please tell me you have a first aid kit.” Powder hollered over her shoulder to Silco.

“Bathroom cabinet, left side.” Silco answered.Powder dragged her to the stairs without a word.

Powder sat Vi on top of the toilet lid as she pulled the first aid kit out.

“Baby, I'm fine.” Vi tried to assure.

“Shut up. I am not buying the tough-butch bullshit. Last thing I need is that hand getting some infection and being out of commission.” Vi was confused until she realized it was her right hand, her strong hand.

Powder dumped saline over top of the knuckles in the sink, dabbing the wound with gauze.

“How did things go with you and dad?” Vi asked.

“Really well actually.” Powder said, smiling at her. “He said that he didn't get it, and he was pretty sure Vander would be irate. But he just asked if we were happy and if both of us were certain about this. He made sure I wasn't holding you at gunpoint or pulling some “fuck me or I'll never be in your life again” shit, and when I assured him all was well, he said he was just happy we seemed to be doing well for each other.” Powder began wrapping Vi’s hand with more gauze covered in antibiotic ointment. “Wanna talk about your chat with pops?”

“You mean you didn't hear it through the walls?”

“Oh I totally did, but I meant if you wanna talk about it. I'm always here to listen, honeybear.” She pecked Vi on the forehead. Vi sighed.

“Separate beds and holding back on PDA around him was the long and short of it.”

Powder's turn to sigh. “I don't want to go back to sleeping alone.” She pouted. Vi pulled her closer, wrapping her arms around Powder’s waist.

“We’ll figure it out. He's family, and honestly I'm just glad he didn't tell us to go and never come back.”

Powder played with her hair. It was growing out, and Vi realized her style had fallen into some strange mesh between Vander and Silco’s styles.

“Wherever we go, we go together.” Powder said plainly. Vi placed a kiss above Powder’s stomach, it was closest to her lips when she leaned forward.

“I wouldn't have it any other way.” Powder leaned down and kissed her.

“Guess I will have to get used to sneaking them when I can.”

They went back downstairs, and could hear the hushed whispers before they took the first step.

“-they’re willing to help us and you want to throw a bunch of demands at them?”

“I don't think “please don’t fondle your sister where I can see” is a very big demand, Silk.”

“Vander, that's not what we're talking about. I swear, the first chance we get to have them in our lives after all these years of trying and you're acting like such an ass I'm shocked Violet agreed to stay at all.”

“Silk, what would Connel and Felicia think? How are you acting like this is so normal!”

“I’m not!” Silco snapped in a harsh whisper. “I’m well aware of how strange this all is. I just refuse to act like an ass about it, unlike some of us.”

“Silk-”

“Do not interrupt me again, Vander. I'm not concerned with the opinions of ghosts, I'm concerned with Violet and Powder’s well-being. Connel and Felicia asked us to look after them, and we failed, handily. They asked us to ensure the two of them were happy, we failed that as well. Now, for the first time in decades, we get to see Violet smile, I simply don't care what it costs. We have what could be our last chance to actually be a family, and I refuse to allow you to ruin it. You will bite your tongue, or I swear to God however long you have left on this earth will be a bitter lonely hell free of my company, do I make myself abundantly clear?”

“God damnit, fine. I'll bite my tongue about this whole… “ordeal”.” Vi could practically hear the air quotes with that bit. “But I can't handle the thought of those two sharing a bed here. It’s just wrong, Silk. Vi said she’d accept that.”

“How long do you expect that acceptance to last?”

“... I'm trying, Silk. I swear. But this is a lot to fuckin process on top of everything else, and it isn't like my noggin is running at full capacity. Can't we ask for that “trying” to go both ways?”

“If we lose them because of you…”

“I'll bear that shame until the day I die. It'll be one sin on a long, long list.”

Silco sighed, then he looked in the direction of the staircase and saw them standing there, halfway down.

“How long have you been listening?” His eyes settled on their hands, locked together.

“Long enough.” Powder said. She looked at Vander and gave a weak half smile. “Thank you.”

Vander kept his eyes on his hands for a long minute, sparing a glance at them. “Of course. You're family. Just… humor an old, sick man's boundaries, and I'll try and be… understanding.”

“We can do that.” Powder said, looking at Vi.

The food got there not long after. Dinner was quiet, and tense, but it was a family dinner, and Vi hadn't had one of those properly in over 20 years, so she couldn't give a rat's ass.

Besides, she could feel Powder's sneaker rub against her boot under the table. It wasn't much, but it was enough. Powder was always enough for her.

“You sure you're gonna be okay without me around, Jayce-ball?” Vi asked as she slammed the tailgate of her rustbucket closed. Just about everything she owned was stuffed into the back of it.

“I’ve got Mel and Vik taking care of me. I'll be just fine.” Jayce assured, his hair a mess, wearing sweat pants and a tanktop. Vi was matching him, save for having lost the tanktop. At least her pants were green instead of “dick print sweatpants” grey like his.

The apartment had finished being deep cleaned the night becore, but moving all the shit to the truck was a morning job. “It’s you I'm worried about. Just a matter of time before lil miss over there is gonna get bored and cause havoc for the fun of it.” Jayce said, nodding to Powder sitting on the hood of the truck.

Her outfit was pristine as ever, shorts, crop top (cut out of one of Vi’s shirts, because how dare Vi want her own shirts), and a blue flannel (also Vi’s).

Powder just chuckled. “Eh, I can always just harass your partners over the phone. Sorry to say, Jayce-and-the-argonauts, but they're way more fun.”

“Hey, I'm the one dating em. I agree.” He settled up against the tailgate with Vi.

“Oh are you finally admitting it now?” Vi asked, nudging him with her elbow.

“Oh let's be honest, that's the worst kept secret in this goddamn town.It’s only a secret because Mel thinks “bisexual polyamorous throuple” might not poll well when we're running for office. But, I don't have to worry about that from you two. You'll be across several state lines. Plus, I've got nuclear level blackmail on you, and that's not even counting the incest.” Vi smacked him in the back of the head, looking around the parking lot while Jayce cackled like a banshee. “Relax, man. I checked before I said it.”

“I'm gonna kick your ass.”

“Hard to do from Jersey.”

“You know there is always the chance we move. Could still end up within ass-kicking and life-ruining range for you.” Vi threatened.

“Okay, so I have to avoid Rhode Island and New Jersey the rest of my life, big fuckin whoop.” Jayce taunted. “Besides, I think I'd rather die than move to Jersey.”

Vi shook her head and bumped Jayce’s shoulder with her own.

“Thanks, man. For everything.”

He clapped her on the back.

“Of course, Vi. Just take care of yourselves, and stay in touch. Tell those old bastards that I'm praying for them.”

“Man, you haven't been to church since we were in highschool.” Vi chuckled out.

“Don't tell my mom.” He was dead serious.

“Oh I'm telling Ximena the moment I see her again. Fuck it, I'll text her right now.”

“Okay okay okay I'm sorry about the incest joke.” He grumbled, and Vi pulled him into a hug.

“I'm gonna miss you, you dipshit.”

“Yeah, well like I said, don't be a stranger. I can bring everyone out to see you in a few months, assuming they still even need you by then.”

“Thanks man. Tell Vik and Mel I said goodbye.”

“Will do.” They looked in the overloaded back of Vi’s truck, and Jayce chuckled. “You’ve come a long way from a few duffle bags by the bed, huh?”

She rested her head on his shoulder, and he hung his arm over hers. Vi looked at Powder and smiled.

“Yeah.”

Chapter Text

“Vi, help, please!” Powder screamed, her voice ringing in Vi’s ears. She can't see her, all she sees is blood.

Flames were everywhere around her, she didn't need to see them, she could feel the heat waft off of them as she crawled along the ground. She reaches around trying to feel her way back to safety, the broken glass digging into her knees, her shins, her knuckles.

“Violet!” Connell screamed in her ear so loud it startles her, sending her sprawling onto her back. Her entire body was left pressed against the broken glass covering the floor of her burning home. Her grasping hands found the handle of a pocket knife, still dripping in wet mud. she grasped it, only to feel more blood splatter in her eyes.

“You were supposed to keep her safe!” Rang in her ears.

She hadn't remembered her mother’s voice in years, but there was no mistaking it.

She writhed in the glass, blinded by the blood in her eyes as she heard Powder scream for help again, begging Vi not to let them take her away.

Vi held the dagger in her hands, the gleam of the firelight against the freshly sharpened tip being the only thing she can see through the blood clouding her vision. Her parents scream in her ears to do it, to right her wrongs, to destroy the monster she’s become. The point of the dagger is inches from her eyes, then it plunges down.

Vi shot up in bed, panting and gasping for air. She could feel the smoke in her chest for a moment before it vanished. It took a few minutes for her heart to calm down, but it did eventually.

She was in the room that had once been meant for her, under a now decade-and-a-half out of fashion bedspread, alone. The desk in the corner still had the photos of them at the Barbecue from their youth. Ekko’s young eyes stared into her soul, and she shook her head to break the spell.

She didn't know what time it was, but she got out of bed anyway. She wiped out a few wrinkles in her faded green shirt, and stumbled down the stairs to find Silco, dressed in his best as always, sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of black coffee and a newspaper.

“Up early again?” Silco asked, looking over the top of his newspaper. Vi saw the clock on the oven, 545, just like the last three days.

“Couldn't sleep.” Vi mumbled out, exactly as she had the last three mornings in a row. She went to a cabinet and popped it open. “Where's the moka pot?’

“Barely been here a few weeks and already losing things, dear boy?” Silco asked with a chuckle. “Other cabinet. Bottom shelf.”

“Can't help it that yall have actual shit in your cupboards.” Vi turned on the burner and prepped the moka pot while it warmed up. She caught a glimpse of herself in the glass in the microwave. She looked like shit.

She popped the top off a bottle of cola, and took it and the now bubbling mocha pot with her to the table, along with an oven mitt and a mug. The mocha pot filled her mug with a couple shots worth, then sat on the oven mit while she topped it with the cola.

She sighed at the familiar taste, sipping it and feeling some semblance of normal returning to her body. She couldn't handle this lack-of-sleep shit like she used to, so the caffeine was a must.

“May I try some?” Silco asked, giving her a chance like he always did. She slid the mug over and he took a long sip.

“Not bad at all. Still a bit sweet for my taste, but it's better than your father’s sugary creamer nightmare.”

“Powder showed it to me. It's the only way I can take my coffee anymore. If I'm hard up, cream and sugar will do. But this, it's… it's home.” She said, taking another sip before dragging her hands down her face, trying to wipe the last of the sleep from her eyes. “We got an appointment tonight in the city, right?”

“We do. Your father and I have a few follow ups prior to our next round of treatment. We need to be there by 3 pm.” Vi nodded and leaned back in her chair, taking another sip.

“Works for me. We’ll have to take your car, unless you want to get real cozy on my bench seat.” Silco chuckled.

“I think our sedan should work just fine.” Silco assured. “I was thinking that perhaps it would be good if we brought your sis-...” He cleared his throat. “Powder along with us, and the four of us could enjoy some time in the city while we're there. I’m not sure how able I'll be to handle the adventure once treatment starts again, and I want to enjoy the city with you all.” Vi smiled.

“That sounds like a good idea.” Vi said. She tapped her mug awkwardly. “You can call her my sister, if that's what’s most comfortable. It doesn't bug me.”

Silco sighed and shrugged. “I think I'll continue with Powder. You two are independent of each other, she deserves to be her own person, as do you.”

Vi shrugged and went to take another sip. “She should be up in about an hour. I'll wake pops up then, make us all breakfast.”

“He should be up around then on his own as well. He doesn't sleep in much, anymore.”

“That's makes a few of us.” Vi joked, finishing her coffee. Silco gave her a tired smile.

“I suppose it does. I was thinking perhaps-”

Vi heard Powder scream, and was on her feet before she could think. Her mug cracked on the ground, and she was up the stairs in an instant, taking them 2 or 3 at a time.

She threw the door open and saw wild, unfocused eyes finally settle on her. Powder was crying, and her hands were reaching for Vi before Vi even made it to the bed. She pulled Vi close and started sobbing into her shoulder. Vi wrapped her arms around her as a very out of breath Silco made it to the door.

“Shhhh, Powpow, it's okay.” Vi whispered, rubbing her back. She had a massive green T-shirt from Vi’s bag on. Powder choked out another sob. “Breathe, Clouds, you gotta breathe. Let it out.”

Vander joined Silco at the door, Vi could recognize his heavy footsteps. Powder sobbed into Vi’s shoulder again. “I… you were… I thought you were gone.”

“I’m right here, baby. You're safe. No one's taking me away.” Vi assured. She could feel Powder’s pink and blue nails digging into her back. “Take another breath for me, sweetheart.”

It was shaky, but Powder took a slow, deep breath in, and let it out. Each one after was a little easier. Vi kept rubbing her back, and eventually her femme settled into slow, calm, even breaths.

“S-shit, I'm sorry.” Powder said, embarrassment creeping in as she saw Vander and Silco still in the doorway.

“Is uh… is there anything you need?” Vander asked, ever the awkward giant.

“N-no. I should be okay. Really, I'm sorry about waking you guys up.”

“Me and Dad were already up.” Vi assured, leaning back and resting her hand on Powder’s. “Are you gonna go back to sleep? Where's your bonnet?”

She'd started wearing it a few months prior. Even with her braids, her hair was getting ridiculously long, and it helped keep it out of her face and protected. Mel had shown them to her.

“I have no fucking idea.” Powder said, a semi-forced laugh coming out. “I uh, I think I'm up for the day.” She swallowed. “Can you stay?”

“Of course.” Vi said, squeezing her hand. She looked to her fathers, seeing Vander look between the two of them, too much going through his mind for Vi to parse from his expression. “Pops, there's coffee in the mocha pot if you want it. Should still be warm. I'll be down in a bit to clean up and cook breakfast.”

“Thanks. I uh, I can get food. Don't worry about it.” Vander muttered out, his eyes met hers, searching for a moment, before looking away quickly.

“No, you rest up. We're in for a long day, sounds like. Dad has lots of plans.” Silco, very quickly, guided Vander away from the door and down the stairs. Vi stayed with Powder, placing a kiss on her temple. “You gonna be okay?”

“I’ll live. The embarrassment is the worst part.” Powder admitted, kissing Vi's neck.

“They get it.”

“I know… still.” Powder sighed. “I miss you.”

“I know, baby. I miss you too. We’ll make time tomorrow, a little date night, just us.”

“That sounds lovely. Pops told me about a little diner out on the edge of town. Could be yummy?”

“Let's do it.” Vi smiled and pulled back, wiping a few stray tears from her femme’s cheeks. “Did you take your meds last night?”

“... I might have spaced it.” Powder admitted.

“Baby, you know those help you sleep.”

“I know, I didn't mean to. I just… you usually remind me before bed. I'm not some kid, I know it's not like, your job to remind me. I'm a big girl, I can remember my own meds. I just fell asleep before I could take em.”

Vi gave her a peck on the lips. “I'll remind you before I go to bed tonight.” Powder smiled and sighed.

“Thank you.” Clouds, in all her fluffy white feline glory, hopped onto the bed between them and nestled in against Powder’s side. The old mutt joined them on the bed as well, licking at Powder’s face. “Hahaha, okay this is a little crowded.”

“A little?” Vi asked, damn near falling off the bed. “You gonna be okay if I go make breakfast?”

“Yeah, I'll be alright. I might stay here with the fur babies for a minute.” Vi gave her a kiss and stood up.

“Go right ahead, I'll make the usual.”

“Thank you, honeybear.”

Vi made it down to see the rest of her bottle of coke gone, the mug cleaned up, and the mocha pot cleaned and sat by the sink as Vander sipped a mug of dark, fizzy coffee.

Vi went to work cooking breakfast, and Vander eventually joined her. “Let me help.”

“Aight.” Vi said, grabbing a carton of eggs out from the fridge. “Mind putting the Mochapot on for another batch?”

“I think I can do that. We gonna need toast?”

“Nah, Pow handles that.” Vi said, starting on grating the hashbrowns.

Powder popped down and took care of the toast a few minutes later. Vander poured her a mug of coffee and Powder popped a new bottle of soda to pour in.

“Sorry about waking you up.” Powder said as she leaned against the counter by Vi and Vander. Her hip maybe a foot from Vi’s.

“Don’t worry about it, Clouds, I'm sure I'll survive on a little less beauty sleep.” Vander assured, pulling up the chair beside Silco, so they could sit and face them.

“I was already up.” Vi said. “Couldn't sleep.” she snaked the mug out of Powder’s hands and took a sip.

“Hey! Mine.” Powder said, snatching the mug back. Vi bumped her hip against Powder’s.

“God damn, fine. I'll just go fuck myself.” Vi lamented dramatically. Powder just chuckled and elbowed her side.

“Oh please, you absolute drama king. If you want another cup I'll make you one.”

“But I don't want my cup, I wanna annoy the shit out of you and take yours.”

“You could never annoy me.” Powder said, before adding “touch my caffeine supply however, and we're gonna have problems.”

“Oh please, I am your primary caffeine supply, little miss “oh no I almost made the mochapot explode!"”

“I’m the one who showed you how to use the moka pot in the first place, dick. That was one time!”

“One time-bomb more like! Damn near blew up the entire fucking apartment.” Vi poked her nose and flipped some eggs in the pan. “Two eggs, over medium with s and p, bacon, extra fatty, and hash.” Vi dished out and handed Powder the plate. “Pops, whatcha want?”

“I’ll snag the same as Clouds. Sounds delicious.”

“Got it. Dad?” Vi looked over her shoulder to Silco.

“I'm not very hungry.” Silco replied.

“Tough shit, you're eating.” Silco chuckled and Vander gave her a strange look of fondness.

“Toast and some eggs, then?” Powder offered.

“That'd be lovely. Thank you, kids.”

Vander and Silco were served up and Vi settled in beside Powder with her own plate piled high with potatoes and runny eggs.

They scarfed down their food, and enjoyed some time around the house. They had a little time to kill, and gathered around the tv, Powder and Vi on the couch, Silco and Vander on their little leather loveseat.

Vander put a movie on, Vi honestly couldn't remember which one. Powder curled up against her on the couch during the opening credits, and the two were asleep minutes after the title card.

Vander woke them up after the movie had ended, and the three of them set about getting ready for the morning. Silco, of course, was already showered and dressed for the day, on his 4th cup of coffee.

Vander went to shower in the master bathroom, while Vi and Powder set about their morning routine in the other bathroom downstairs.

A while later, Vi popped out dressed in blue jeans, a tank top, and an old green flannel. Powder stuck with a simple dress, forest green and A-line with pleats in the skirt and black tights. She added some fresh polish to her pink and blue nails while Vi laced her boots on the couch. She stood up and grabbed an old denim jacket from the coat closet, the fabric outside was faded from age, and the inside was lined with what looked and felt like a wool blanket. It was cozy, but Vi realized it wasn't hers. She saw the time on the clock, ten minutes behind schedule, and threw it on anyway, hollering that she was ready to go.

They loaded into the sedan, a Subaru made within the last decade which felt downright luxurious. Vi and Silco say in the front with Powder and Vander in the back as they made their way into the city.

The appointments went quick, and Vi spent most of the time her parents were in with the doc coordinating future appointments with the clinic. Powder was in talks with a shop about opening a space, and Vi was starting with her new garage in a week’s time. They'd figured out the week days that they’d be able to keep open for appointments, and Vi was thankful Powder had thought to plan ahead like that.

Vi could take them to a treatment Mondays and Powder was ready to take Wednesdays and Fridays. Between the two of them, they could make just about everything work.

The appointment wrapped up, just about a thousand new ones freshly programmed into their online family calendar, and they set out to hit the town.

Silco was insistent on seeing the local art museum. He ranted and raved about it the entire drive there, gloating about the massive collection of so many different works from different eras. The museum had apparently hired some new leadership who were “shaking up the art world” by bringing together collections around themes and motifs, as opposed to eras, artists or styles. Vi kept her mouth shut, because she hadn't even realized that was a controversial thing. Vi figured “showing off paintings about similar shit” was how art museums worked.

Then again, she hadn't been to one since she was 14, so what the fuck did she know? When they pulled up to the museum, Vi was certain God was laughing at her.

In massive, bold text, Vi saw the words “Oedipus Rex” above a display featuring the museum’s newest collections.

“You've got to be fucking kidding me.” Vi muttered to herself as Powder took her arm, Vander and Silco already walking to the entrance.

“Could be worse. At least it's not a collection of fan art for Flowers In The Attic.” Vi didn't even know what that was.

They walked in with their dads,paid far too much for 4 admissions, and the four of them meandered around in vaguely the same direction.

They didn't talk about it, but they ended up going just about anywhere they could that wouldn't mean going to the room with the main exhibit. Vander and Vi seemed in solidarity with each other, not wanting shit to do with seeing that.

Vi saw a few pretty pieces, but really Powder was the one enjoying herself, leading them around to every plaque and piece, reading every description. She’d “ooh” and “ah” at every design and pattern. “I could do something like this for a tattoo! Oh I could just imagine using this kind of perspective for a design. Oh my God, baby, look at the pretty deer!” But at a certain point Vi was having more fun watching her look at the art then the art itself.“-god look at the colors of that sunset, that's just stunning, isn't it?” Powder asked.

“Mhmm.” Vi responded. Powder looked at her and rolled her eyes.

“It’d be more believable if you looked at the painting while you said it.”

“I'm looking at the prettiest piece in the whole damn building. I'm fine.” Powder rolled her eyes and blushed.

“You're such a cheeseball.” But she pecked Vi on the cheek, their arms still linked.

Eventually, they had to enter the main room to get out of the building, because again; God thought their life was a sick joke, and wanted Violet personally to suffer.

Vi ended up in the dead-center between two paintings. One marked “by Charles Francois Jalabert”, showing a blinded man standing tall, his daughter in pink guiding him through streets and crowds that recoil at the sight of him. Some people point, some lean away, no one pays the two a kind eye, but the man stands tall regardless. Vi catches Silco out of the corner of her eye, seeing him gazing at another painting along with Powder just beyond Jalabert’s work.

The other painting in front of Vi is marked “by Prema Besada” and shows a single man alone, face buried in the crook of his arm as he sits, curled up alone between two massive pillars of white. Vander settles in next to her as Vi’s eyes linger on the red rawness of the man’s flesh. His ribs and sides seem almost gorey, but Vi takes in the red along his knees and shins. She can't help but remember glass.

Vander stood there with her, quiet for a long moment, his eyes seeming to stare at the same details. Vi felt an old nagging question ripping at the back of her mind.

“Do you know the myth?” She asked.

“Mhm.” Vander muttered, still staring.

“Do you think he still loved her? You know, when he…” She points to her eyes. He looked at her with a reasonable amount of concern.

“Does it matter?”

Vi sighed and kept staring.

“I don't know. Doesn't it feel like it should?”

He didn't reply. After what felt like hours besides each other, he swallowed and looked to Vi, nudging her with his elbow.

“Why don't we go join the others? We've been here a few hours. I could go for some dinner.” he offered.

“Sounds good to me.” Vi said, he clapped her on the back and they walked past Jalabert’s painting and toward their partners. Both are greeted with a smile, but Silco looks at Vander with a bit more concern.

“Everything okay, dear?”

“I'll be alright. Just uh, got lost in thought.” Vander looked at them all, but his eyes seemed to rest on Powder’s. “How does Italian sound for tonight?”

“Heavenly.” Powder said, looping her arm with Vi’s again. “What do you think?” She asked Vi.

“I could fuck up some olive garden.” The other three laughed, Vi didn’t get it.

“There's a lovely little spot we know, a little “Mom n pop from the old country” kinda place. It's a decent drive, but not too far.” Vander said as they headed for the exit.

They got to the main street and started walking. It was dark out already, and the air had taken a chill. Powder huddled closer to Vi, their arms still linked.

“I wasn't expecting it to get so cold.” Powder muttered.

“Fall’s coming early this year. Winter'll be here sooner than you expect.” Vander agreed.

Vi stripped her borrowed jacket off, the old blanket lining and faded denim shedding quick before she laid it over Powder’s shoulders.

“Thank you.” Powder said, sliding her arms into the oversized sleeves and retaking Vi’s arm. They turned a corner, and Vi caught Vander looking at them, curiosity in his eyes, fixated on the jacket.

“Vi, where’d you find that old thing?” He asked, chuckling as if he didn't believe he was seeing it.

“Back of the coat closet, why?”

“... Nothin, just hadn't seen it in a long time. Didn't even recognize it.” Vander shook his head.

“How far to the car?” Powder asked.

“I was following your lead… Fuck.” Vi groaned as realization hit her.

“Oh my God you didn't.” Powder looked at her, agog. They were lost in the middle of Newark.

“We parked ages ago, cut me some slack.”

“Alright, alright, we know it was somewhere around here.” Vander began, “Let's just go ahead and split up. We go left, you go right, call the other when you find it.”

“Deal.” Powder said, leading Vi by her arm down their assigned part of the road.

They wandered and wandered, having dick-all luck and getting more and more into the side streets outside the main drag. Powder giggled and squeezed Vi’s arm. “I really can't believe you forgot where we parked their car.”

“In my defense, I'm used to my rustbucket being visible from space.” Vi said.

“True. Are you ever gonna actually replace the old jalopy?”

“Hell no. With good maintenance, that bag of bolts will be driving our grandkids around. Besides, there's a few too many good memories in that truck for me to give her up just yet.” She said, bumping Powder’s hip with her own. Powder didn't react to the bump.

“...grandkids?” Powder asked, a blush creeping onto her cheeks. “I think you need to have kids before that, and that's not exactly a capacity we have anymore.”

“I mean, we could always adopt. Try and be better about it than… well…” Powder knew the end of that sentence already.

“Vi, we couldn't.”

“Why not?”

“I can think of one massive reason!” Powder pointed out, prodding Vi’s side with her finger.

“We could adopt a kid legally. It's called kinship adoption. We just keep our mouths shut and make it seem like we're normal siblings, and if we pass the other inspections it'd circumvent any of the weird marriage requirements the state may have.” Powder looked at her for a long minute, a smile creeping onto her lips.

“You seem to be very well researched on this, Vivi.” Now it was Vi’s turn to blush. She scratched at the back of her head nervously.

“I uh, you know, did some research. I've been having trouble sleeping lately, was just scrolling and uh, happened to find a few interesting articles.” She was so full of shit she could've been wrapped in tinfoil and called a manure silo.

Powder just giggled and pressed a kiss to her lips. It was the first real kiss they'd gotten in a few hours, and Vi felt like she was going through withdrawals. She stole another kiss, and Powder giggled against her as she returned it.

“I love you, you dork.” Powder said as she pulled back. “Shall we return to our search?”

“Lead the way, babygirl.”

They wandered farther and farther into the weird and winding side streets.

They passed a half dozen cars that looked like the one they needed, but none that were actually it. Vi really was appreciating the rust on her old truck, she knew the pattern of it by heart at this point.

They spent what felt like hours searching, wandering up and down the city streets looking for any sign of the car.

Vi felt like they had walked miles by that point, and were no closer to to finding their car. They took a turn, and another, looping around trying to find anything that looked familiar, with precisely zero luck.

“I'm losing my mind, there's no way we're this fuckin lost.” Vi mumbled to herself.

“I know, right? I feel like we have to have passed the car at some point.”

Vi sighed and they took a corner down a smaller side street. There were bars up and down the sides, and out in between two of them, a pair of guys sat playing instruments, a small bucket in front of them with some cash in the bottom.

The music they were playing was jazzy and light, meant to gode drunk bar patrons into giving a few dollars.

“Oh that's lovely.” Powder said, hugging Vi’s arm as she heard the music as well. Vi watched the smile creep onto her face, the smile lines popping out, the skin at the edge of her eyes creasing slightly, leaving Vi with the unbearable urge to place a kiss right there.

She did, and Powder giggled and poked her in the ribs. “You trying to eat my eyes, you weirdo?”

“Wouldn't be the first part of you I ate.” Vi whispered, getting a slap in the arm and a blush flaring across Powder’s cheeks as her reward. But Powder was still smiling, and that's all Vi cared about.

Powder pulled her arm away, feigning offense. “Well I never.” She harrumphed. “So vulgar.”

“Yeah and that wet spot you left on my bench seat wasn't?” Vi teased, that one hit home, jaw dropping in feigned offense.

“Oh you little shit. If that's how you're gonna be.” Powder sauntered off ahead of Vi, her hips swaying with every step. Vi just appreciated the view, continuing to walk on. One of the two guys playing their music chuckled as she walked by.

“Lady troubles, man?”

“Only the good kind.” Vi replied. The man, an older white guy who had no hair on the top of his head and so much fucking hair everywhere else, laughed.

“Good for you, brother.” he said, returning to his guitar. Vi looked at Powder and a thought struck her. She pulled her wallet out and grabbed a pair of 20s.

“You guys got anything we can dance to?”

“Hell yeah brother. Thank you.” She handed him the 40 bucks and they stopped mid song.

“Clouds!” Vi called, her femme stopping and facing her as the music changed to something slow, rhythmic, the type of shit Vi remembered playing in the background of school dances while she got the shit kicked out of her in middle school. “Can I have this dance?”

Powder looked at her, being swallowed whole by the oversized jacket, her braids hanging down to her shoulders, and a massive smile painting itself on her lips as she realized what Vi was asking.

She scampered back to Vi and threw her arms around her neck, tackling her into what felt like a good slow dancing posture. Vi’s hands settled on her hips, and the two spun around lazily to the tune being played by the two guys a couple dozen feet away. They spun around on the side street together, Powder giggling for the whole first minute.

“You're such a dork.”

“Yeah, well you're kinda stuck with me, so I hope you like it.”

“I love it.” Powder said, resting her head on Vi’s shoulder. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Vi said, placing a kiss on her temple. Powder pulled back, looking up at Vi with a look that held every ounce of tenderness Vi could believe existed in the world. Vi couldn't do anything but stare at her, her massive grin, her scrunched up eyes, her bright pink cheeks, her soft lips.

She was blessed, that was the only thing Vi could think as they spun around together. Around and around and around they went. On one spin, Vi caught a glimpse of Vander at the entrance to the side street. Their eyes met for a moment, by their next rotation around, he was gone.

The music slowed, and moved on to a new song. They stood there for a minute, just enjoying the warmth.

“Everything you hoped for?” Vi asked, placing a kiss to her temple, her head back on Vi’s shoulder.

“So much better.” Powder said, pecking her on the corner of her jaw. “Thank you, honeybear.”

“Of course. Let's uh, let's head back. I think we can confirm it's not on our side of town.” Powder giggled and followed Vi back up the street to where they had come from, where Vander had been.

When they exited their little side street, Vi saw Vander leaning against a pole a little bit up the sidewalk.

“Hey, what're you doing here?” Powder said.

“We found the car.” He said.

“I thought you were gonna call?” Powder asked.

“I did. Neither of you picked up.” He replied with a chuckle. The looked at each other, both reaching for their phones, only to find Vi’s phone was in the pocket of Powder’s jacket, and Powder's phone was dead in the pocket of her dress. “Not a big deal, don't worry about it. You two only made it maybe 3 blocks from our starting point.” He said, clapping Vi on the shoulder. “Let's go home.”

They walked back to find Silco waiting in the car. They made quick apologies and got in, Vander driving this time, Vi beside him, with Powder and Silco in the back.

The drive home was quiet up front. Vander had a tight grip on the steering wheel, his eyes looking at the road with his mind miles away. Vi settled into the quiet, occasionally tuning in to Powder and Silco’s chit chat.

They were tired and opted for some take out from the Italian joint. Vi called the orders ahead while they were driving, and brought the food out to find Silco and Powder both dozing in the back seat by the time she got there. She climbed in and closed the door as gently as she could.

Vander looked into the back of the car with his rearview mirror and cleared his throat. Neither of the dozing pair in the back stirred. He looked to Vi and and took a breath, looking back out the front window. “You know…” he began, pausing for a second. “That jacket was your father's. Connel, I mean.”

“Oh, shit. I didn't mean to-”

“No, no. It's good that you have it.” He said. “I held onto it all these years so you could. Just never remembered to actually give it to you… I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for a lot of things.” He sighed again, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. “You look just like him, you know that? Not the hair, obviously. You got that from your mother. But… God, everything else is just like him. You sound like him too. Sometimes you'll be talking, and I'll forget for just a minute that he's gone. Powder does the same with Felicia.”

“I… thank you.” Vi said, not sure what else she could say.

“No, thank you. I… I didn't realize how much I missed them until I started feeling like they were back in some little way.” He took a long breath, shuddering just a bit at the end. He swallowed and cleared his throat. “The uh… the couch-bed sleeps two.”

Vi was afraid to assume what he meant. “W-what?”

“It'd be snug, but I uh, I don’t imagine that will be an issue for you two. I think it'll do until we figure out a more permanent solution to you and Powder’s sleeping arrangements.” Vander said.

“I… thank you.”

“Don't misunderstand me, I don't like this. I love you both, but… I can't help but feel like we failed you. If we had been able to bring you home, give you two a normal, happy life together… maybe this all would be different. But, you two need each other. I may be a sick old man, but I'm not blind just yet. You look like shit, boy, and the only time that changes is when you two are together. I don't know if I'll ever be… okay with this whole deal, but I can't in good conscience call you my son and then do something I know is hurting you.”

“I understand. Thank you, pops. Really, I… I can't thank you enough.” Vi paused for a moment and couldn't help herself but ask something nagging at the back of her mind. “What changed?” He looked at her, then back at Powder.

“... She looks at you like your old man always looked at your mum. I learned a long time ago, ain't nothin in heaven or earth that can stop a Dollanganger with that look in their eyes.”

Vi chuckled at that. She'd have to tell Powder that once she woke up.

“Love you, pops.”

“Love you too, boy. And please, for the love of God, spare my heart. That bed is for sleeping only. Understood?”

“Trust me, you don't have to worry about that.”

They'd learned that lesson a long time ago.

Ekko sighs to himself as he looks over at Cait.

“From what Jayce told me, Vander died pretty suddenly a couple months after Vi and Powder moved in. Some things got missed on one of his brain scans, it had progressed a lot farther than they thought, couldn't afford the better scans or something like that. He had a stroke. He just… collapsed late one night.” Ekko explained.

“Oh my God…” Caitlyn whispered, floored by the thought of losing him so soon, so suddenly.

“Yeah. It still fucks with Vi pretty bad. But, after that, things changed around their house a lot. ” Ekko said. “Vander being gone, Silco said it didn't really make sense for him to keep the master bedroom anymore. Powder figured it was more about him not wanting to have to stay in the room and be reminded of him as much. Silco moved into one of the two smaller rooms, and the master bedroom was just kinda empty for a while. After a few months, Vi and Powder eventually moved rooms, got new stuff in there, y'know. Vi told me that she and Powder started fostering Isha about a year after Vander died. Said the house just felt too empty. Plus, you know, not knowing how long Silco had, they wanted their kid to at least get to meet her grampa. I showed up about a year after that. Jayce clued me in to the shit that they'd been dealing with. I had taken a lot of time to, you know process everything, and I ended up deciding I wanted to talk to Vi. He told me that they were having a party at the family home. Wouldn't you know it, it was an hour’s drive and one state away.”

Their morning alarm went off. Vi slapped her phone till it shut up, swapping it to playing music before rolling over and nestling into Powder’s neck. “Today’s the day.” She mumbled half-asleep as the tune played from her speaker.

“Hng, five more minutes.” Powder whined.

“Last time I let you do that you were late and got mad at me. You've got an important client today.”

Powder groaned, nestling into her covers. “It's two clients.”

“So even more important that you actually show.” Vi teased, kissing along Powder’s clavicle.

“Fucking responsible asshole.” Powder grumbled, but she opened her eyes, still managing to smile down at Vi. Vi continued lavishing her lips on Powder’s collarbones, moving up to her neck. She managed to draw a giggle out of her, her hands finding their way to her hips. “Mmmm, careful, tiger.”

“What, I can’t enjoy waking up next to my milfy girlfriend?” Vi teased, nipping at Powder’s neck.

“Oh shut up you goofball. I’m not a milf.” Powder said, swatting Vi’s forehead.

“I mean, you’ve got a kid, and some plump, very grabbable hips.” Vi emphasized her point by squeezing her hands around said hips, drawing a gasp and a sleepy giggle out of her partner. “Sounds like a milf to me.”

“Shut up, I haven't put on that much weight.” Powder said, still leaning down to kiss Vi. She hadn’t, but that wasn’t even a thought to Vi.

Powder’d settled in comfortably, they both had. Vi’d definitely lost some muscle definition, put on a little ponch, but she couldn’t give less of a shit. The only person she wanted to impress was currently in her bed. On Powder, that settling had taken the form of just a bit of extra cushion around Vi’s favorite parts, namely, everything. Her hips, her stomach, her thighs and her cheeks (both meanings of the word).

“Baby, I never said that. A little softness looks good on you.” And it did. Powder looked happy, like she’d gotten to enjoy just a bit of the softness of the world that had been taken from them so long ago. Vi loved it, loved every reminder of it. And god be damned if it didn’t make her hard to appreciate it. She had chosen her words very carefully when she called Powder’s hips grabable.

“You’re just saying that.” Powder grumbled, embarrassed.

“Bullshit.” Vi said back, content to prove it to her. She gripped Powder’s hips, shifting them until she was sat right between her femme’s legs, dipping forward to press a kiss to Powder's lips.

Powder didn't take much convincing. Her legs wrapped around Vi’s waist, and her arms around Vi's neck, pulling the two of them flush against each other. Vi pressed her thumbs into the crease of Powder’s hip just to pull a squeel out of her. It opened her mouth up perfectly for Vi to slip her tongue in.

Powder didn't taste sweet, Vi was sure she didn't either. They both tasted like god awful morning breath and Vi devoured the taste just as rabidly. She lapped her tongue against Powder’s, grinding her hips forward in sync. Powder moaned into her mouth, fingers rushing up into her hair, pulling tight.

“God damn.” Vi grunted as she moved her lips to Powder’s throat.

“No bruises anywhere visible.” Powder instructed.

“I'm not an amateur.” Vi teased, nipping at her sister’s ear with her canines.

“No, but you've certainly got the enthusiasm of one, don't you boy?” Powder teased, slapping Vi’s cheek playfully. “Mmmm, wanna show me what else you've got?”

“Do you really gotta ask?” Vi tried to reply. Powder wrapped a hand around her throat, squeezing ever so gently.

“Mmmm, that’s not the answer I was looking for.” Powder pulled Vi closer by the throat. “Try again.” Vi did three things in a single second, throb, get light headed, and hitch her breath.

“F-fuck… yeah, yes, God yes, please.” Vi finally stuttered out. Powder grinned at her and smacked her cheek again, playfully.

“Good boy.” Powder said, releasing her grip on Vi’s waist with her legs.

Vi all but dove over to her bedside table, snaking out a mass of leather and plastic, along with a bottle of lube. Vi was very practiced with fastening her harness, however even she hit a snag while sliding it into place, her attention being drawn to Powder. In the moment Vi’s eyes had moved to the drawer, Powder had slid the stolen shirt she called a nightgown up to her collarbone, one hand snaking its way between her legs, rubbing in slow, languid circles as the other hand moved to her soft chest, toying with one pierced nipple.

Vi didn't care how many times she'd seen it all, a view like that made her brain short circuit.

Powder put a finger in her own mouth, licking it slowly before returning it between her legs, letting it slip in slowly. The whole time here eyes never left Vi’s. She let out a little huff, before speaking. “You gonna keep gawking or do something about it?”

“Baby, give me the time I'll do everything.” Vi said, hastily fastening the harness in place as Powder worked herself up. By the time Vi finished, Powder had worked herself up to two fingers, and worked Vi up enough that when her dick pressed against the leather back pad of her strap, the pressure alone made her see stars. “Fuck, you're too good at that.”

Powder giggled at her, pumping her fingers in and out as she panted out a desperate “quit talking and fuck me already, you dumb mutt.”

“Yes ma’am.” Vi grinned, snatching a condom from the bedside drawer, slipping it over her strap (it made clean up easier, fuck off) and dripping a frankly ridiculous amount of lube over it. Powder took a moment, stroking the dripping wet plastic cock, sending a shiver up Vi's spine from the pressure before taking her now slick fingers and returning them to under the soaked through thong between her legs.

Vi gripped Powder’s legs and pushed them up until they rested comfortably on Vi’s shoulders. She pulled the thong off, chucking it away before grabbing Powder’s hip with one hand, rubbing the tip of her strap against the already slick entrance with the other. She could see the scars from her surgery, and trailed the tip of her thumb along one, sending a shiver through her sister’s body.

“You sure you're ready?”

“Fuck me now or I swear to God I'll just ride the dildo and make you watch.”

That thought damn near knocked Vi on her ass. But, she steadied herself and grasped Powder’s hip, sliding herself in with a slow, unyielding thrust.

“Fuck!” Powder choked out. Vi’s hand latched over her mouth, chuckling as she rocked her hips slightly, another couple moans muffled by her hand.

“Gotta be quiet, sweetheart. I know that's hard for you.” Powder rolled her eyes, Vi rolled her hips, and Powder proved Vi’s point by screaming into her palm. “That's what I thought.” Vi grunted out, sliding all but the tip out before taking her first real, full thrust in. Powder groaned under her, and Vi repeated the process.

The call and response of thrust and moan repeated faster and faster until Vi’s hips smacked against Powder’s ass in time with the music, Powder’s screaming kept mercifully quiet by the hand over her mouth.

Every thrust in drove Vi a little closer to her own cliff, the pressure against her dick combining with the sweet sounds of Powder screaming driving her insane. She groaned into Powder’s ear, panting and gasping for breath as she whispered out. “Fuck, baby, I think I'm gonna cum.” Powder’s nails dug into her arms, goading her on, begging not-so-silently into her palm “faster, harder.”

Vi obliged, grunting and whimpering as she thrust with everything she had left. The nails digging into her skin gripped tighter and tighter until Vi felt Powder clench around her cock, pressing leather against her dick and finally dumping her over the edge. “Fuck, fuck, take it. God take it.” She moaned into Powder’s ear, managing a half dozen final thrusts before collapsing on top of her, her hand finally falling from Powder’s mouth, the two panting and gasping for breath in a pile of sweaty limbs.

They had just about regained their breath when Vi’s alarm, the real alarm, went off.

“Oh you asshole.” Powder giggled out from under her. “You planned this whole thing.”

“Guilty. Figured it'd be a good way to wake you up.” Vi confessed, pressing a kiss to Powder’s neck. “Shower then breakfast?” Vi offered. Powder nodded yes and the two lurched out of bed like fucked-out zombies.

They brushed their teeth together in the bathroom sink, before Powder started the shower and stripped. A baggy shirt hit the ground, soon joined by Vi’s boxers, harness, and a dingy pair of green sweats.

“I still don't know about letting Isha call out sick.” Powder grumbled as she climbed into the shower.

“Baby, it's her birthday. Besides, I have the day off. Let me have a daddy-daughter day with her while you have your clients, then we can all have a nice afternoon together before the party.”

Powder was still hesitant. “I just don't know. Is that setting a good example? School is important!”

“And Isha has been studying her heart out all year.” Vi pointed out. “Her teachers think she's a saint, and the only class she's having trouble in is math. Let her have a day. I'll run through her signing practice with her while I'm here.” Vi grabbed the hair brush from the little basket hanging from the showerhead, already setting to work helping Powder brush out her ungodly mass of hair.

“Fuck, in all the prep for her party I completely spaced helping her with her math homework.” Powder groaned, dragging her hands down her face. “Oh my God, I'm a terrible mother!”

“Okay, no, stop it.” Vi couldn't help but laugh. “I'll do her math homework with her too, then, how about that?”

Powder sighs. “...Okay, you win.”

“Hey, “it's not winning-”” Powder sighed again and finished the dorky slogan the foster guide had taught them.

“”Because parenting is not a competition, it's a team sport.” Okay, I agree, letting her stay home is a good idea. But do her homework while I'm gone, okay? I wanna be able to enjoy it when we're all together.” Vi smiled at Powder and pecked her on the lips.

“That I can do.” Vi assured, Even if she knew Powder was absolutely going to end up taking a nap after work anyway.

“Here, flip around, let me get your back.” She scrubbed at the aged ink on Vi’s back, and Vi watched the suds on her shoulders drip down her upper arm and the far newer tattoo that was marked there, an old grey-in-the-mouth mutt, with a burst blood vessel in one eye, and a blue and white cloud charm on his collar. Powder pressed a kiss to Vi’s spine.

“Do we know how many of her friends are coming?” Powder asked.

“I know Prema and her dad are coming, if that's what you mean.”

“She has other friends.” Powder said with a giggle.

“Does she? Cus all she ever talks to me about is Prema. “Oh dad, Prema made a great joke!” “oh lunch was fun! I ate with Prema.""can Prema sleep over?”.”

“... So you're sure her dad is bringing her?”

“Yup, asked him at the PTA meeting last week. He was a sterling conversationalist as always.” Vi said with an eye roll.

“He's just quiet. Can you blame him? He's got that big scar and the neck tattoo, he probably just doesn't want to scare anyone by being too loud.”

“Baby, I'm the only diesel dyke in that room, I get it. I got exactly 6 words out of him. “Hey, sup, cool,” and “we’ll be there”.”

“Try asking him about the bat tattoo he has on his neck. I wanted to try that last time Isha and Prema had a playdate.”.

“Aight, I'll try it tonight and see how it goes.” Vi said with a sigh. They finished readying themselves for the day.

Vi was in a fresh pair of sweats and a green tank top, she'd wear something fancy when they got ready for guests. Powder was looking absolutely scrumptious in a black top and shorts, green knee high socks under her boots and one of vi’s flannels over top of it all.

Vi walked down the stairs to be greeted by the sight of Silco, his hair just barely grown back from his last round of Chemo, sipping his morning coffee with Isha in her pj’s in the seat beside him. She was wearing an old Miner’s cap that she'd found while helping Silco pack up Vander’s stuff. Her fluffy brown hair bloomed out of the bottom of the helmet.

“There's the birthday girl!” Vi said, grabbing the now 5 year old under the arms and heaving her up onto her shoulder. Vi sang a copyright-free birthday song, doing a little jig around the kitchen before setting the kiddo on the counter beside the stove. Vi moved her hands in front of her to sign out “bacon and toast?”

Isha responded by nodding and signing out ‘thank you!’

“What about hashbrowns?”

Another “thank you”.

“and eggs?” That got a grossed out face and a shaking head in response.

“Got it, no eggs.” Vi said out loud. “Can you help me with the toast? Mama has to get ready for work.” Isha nodded yes, grabbing the bag of bread off the counter nearby and dropping down onto the floor, taking her little step stool up to where the toaster had been moved at the corner of the counter.

Vi cranked the stove and threw the hash browns in on one pan, throwing bacon and eggs in another. Powder was running around getting her stuff gathered for the shop, and Vi had a mug filled with a double shot of espresso and cola ready to go with a plate of food by the time she was sat at the table.

“Happy birthday sweetheart.” Powder said, kissing Isha on the forehead. She sat in the next seat over, leaving Isha with Silco on one side and her on the other. “You're gonna stay here with Daddy and Grandad while I go do some work stuff, okay? But just remember, school is very important.”

“I know, mom.” Isha signed back, giving a quick “thank you” before tearing into her stack of potatoes, toast and bacon. The greasy pile was packed away astonishingly fast.

Powder finished her plate and drink, and by the time she set her dishes in the sink Vi had an insulated cup full of another double shot and cola ready. The lid was on and it was ready to be stuffed into her hands with a kiss and a “love you, sweetheart.”

Vi took her plate and Silco's and set them down at the same time. She signed out a quick “Isha, honey, don't forget to put your dishes away.” Isha nodded and grabbed the dishes, setting them on her little step stool before moving it from the toaster to the sink.

While she set the dishes down, Vi tore into her plate. Silco bit into a piece of bacon and flipped through the newspaper, a mug of black coffee quickly replacing the bacon in his other hand. “Electrical workers win union vote at New York power plant.” He read the headline of some middle-of-the-paper story, a smile on his face.

“Good for them.” Vi said through a mouth full of eggs and burnt toast. Isha settled into her spot by Silco again, looking excitedly at Vi. “It's delicious, honey.” Vi signed out, swallowing an especially charred bite before flashing the biggest smile she could give. Isha beamed up at her, and Silco gave her a knowing smile. “Go get your homework folder, and we can get that done so we can have a fun rest of your birthday!” Isha nodded and ran up the stairs to her room.

“I still gotta call the school.” Vi sighed, chomping into a bite of burned toast.

“I already did, before you two even came down those stairs.” Silco said, sipping his coffee as he folded up the paper.

“How'd you know to do that?” Vi asked.

“Oh please, Violet. There was not a chance in hell you two were sending that girl away on her birthday.” He said, finishing another strip of bacon. Vi chuckled and shook her head, scarfing down another scoop of her breakfast.

“That predictable?”

“Always have been, the both of you.” He set the newspaper down in front of her, greeting her with the photo from the story he'd been reading. There, in front of a massive flag for the electrical workers union, sat Ekko, grinning from ear to ear. “Ekko seems to be doing well for himself.”

Vi smiled as she saw his face. He'd changed the style on his locks, a few charms shaped like lightning bolts interspersed amongst them. It looked good on him. “Good for him.”

“That plant is only an hour’s drive from here.” Silco observed, looking over his mug at her. Vi sighed.

“He told me if he wanted me back in his life, he'd be the one to contact me, dad.” Vi reminded him.

“I think he'd understand.” Silco assured. “Isha’s been asking about him again. Wondering when she finally gets to meet this “Uncle Ekko” she hears so much about in your stories.” Vi sighed, and stuffed down another bite.

“He asked something of me, dad. I'm gonna honor that. I owe him that much.”

“Violet, do you have any idea how many times I told your fathers, both of them, that I never wanted to see them again? Far more than I could count. There's love in this world, my dear boy, but only for those willing to fight for it.”

“I know, dad. But Ekko will tell me when he's ready. He’s had my number memorized since he was 20, and he knows I wouldn't change it.” Silco gave her a look that felt so very dad-ish, a raised brow with a half smile that made every decision she'd ever made feel like a childish mistake. But Isha, the saint she was, scampered into the room with her homework folder and a pencil bag, saving Vi from further discussion.

They sat at the table for almost two hours, working through math problems and then practicing the signs of Isha’s ASL program. Vi learned a few new ones to add to her collection, and had to help Isha adjust one particular sign to ensure she wasn't accidentally calling people bitches.

Isha ran her homework back to her room as Vi prepped her a snack. “Dad!” She hollered from the kitchen, “You want a grilled ham and cheese?”

“Not hungry, dear boy.” He replied from the couch, a novel in his hands. Vi covered Isha’s ears with her hands.

“Bullshit, you barely ate breakfast.” She uncovered Isha’s ears, the girl giggling like a maniac from her place sat on the counter by the stove.

“That does not change the fact I’m not hungry, Violet.”

She sighed and covered Isha's ears again. “Go smoke a joint then, you need to eat if you're gonna get your strength up. Your next round starts in a few weeks.” She uncovered Isha's ears as Silco sighed and stood, wandering up the stairs to his room.

“You know I could still hear?” Isha signed to her as she flipped the first grilled cheese.

“Than that can just be a little daddy-daughter secret.” Vi replied, before adding “also, probably not a smart thing to admit to. But thank you for being honest.” Isha harrumphed at her in a way that just screamed Powder’s influence.

Vi popped the mining cap off her head to tuss her hair as Silco returned a few minutes later smelling like patchouli and with his good eye bloodshot to shit.

Vi set a grilled ham and cheese in front of him with a cup of black coffee. Isha sat in the seat beside him and Vi poured her a little mug with cola in it so she could match her grandfather. Vi ate her own sandwich as Isha was finishing hers. She got a text from Jayce that put a smile on her face as she looked at Silco.

A few minutes later, Vi got another text from Powder that made her smile even wider. She looked to Isha, wearing a pair of boy's overalls and a big sweater, mining cap still on her head. “Mommy should be home soon. Why don't you clean up, buddy.” Isha beamed and rushed to set her dishes in the sink.

Powder walked in with a tired look on her face a bit later than expected. Vi had espresso and cola ready to go the moment she stepped in. “You're an angel.” Powder sighed, taking the mug with a kiss to Vi’s lips.

“Finish that and go get some rest, baby. Jayce, Mel and Vik should be here in the next hour or two.”

“But Isha-””-hasn’t had a nap all day either. Her homework is done, she just had lunch, and she should probably get a nap in before her big exciting party tonight.” Vi said with a smile. Isha, as if on cue, let out a long yawn from her spot beside her grandfather on the couch. “Thank you, honeybear.”

“Of course. Drink up and go grab a nap.” Powder chugged the caffeine and set the mug down in the sink.

“Isha, sweety. Do you think a nap is a good idea?” Isha pouted and shook her head no, pretty swiftly yawning again. “I was gonna go take a nap on me and daddy’s bed. Does that sound nice?” Isha seemed to debate it, but nodded yes. Vi smiled as she saw Powder pick Isha up in her arms, carrying her on her hip up the stairs. Powder was predictable, and Vi was glad she'd taken a minute to throw fresh sheets on the bed and make sure her bedside drawer was closed tight.

There were some mistakes one really tried to only make once as a parent. Not fully closing the drawer with a curious kid in the house, one of the big ones.

She peaked her head in about 10 minutes later to see Powder wearing her bonnet, Isha curled up in her arms, the two snoring softly, fast asleep already. How the hell the kid could sleep in that mining cap, Vi had no idea. They hadn't even stayed awake long enough to get under the blanket. Vi fixed that, draping the comforter over the two of them, and sneaking back down the steps to start prepping for the party.

Ekko stood outside of the home that he had last entered hauling Vi’s bloodied, broken body. Now, his 2006 Subaru Outback sat in the driveway next to a rustbucket piece of shit truck that was a sight for sore eyes. He heard kids laughing and yelling on the other side of the fence, and wondered if maybe Jayce had been telling the truth.

He was wearing a pair of blue jeans, a T-shirt, and a puffy green jacket. He looked at his watch, the faded pink fabric of the straps matching the dimming LED display that told him he was half an hour late for when Jayce had said to show.

A soccer ball landed in the lawn in front of him, and two kids ran out to follow it. The first kid had grey-brown hair tucked under what looked like an old miner’s cap and massive golden-brown eyes that greeted him with instant recognition he couldn't reciprocate. The second kid had terra cotta skin and bright green eyes that looked confused at him.

Golden-eyes ran up to him and wrapped her arms around his leg, giggling. He froze, not sure what to do.

“Isha, who’s that?” Green-eyes asked. Ekko watched the kid let go of his leg, tapping the side of her head with her hand in the shape of a u. “Oh! So you're uncle Ekko! Hi, I'm Prema!”

“Uh, nice to meet you.” Ekko said, confused.

“Isha, sweetheart, you better not be playing in the street again.” Ekko heard a familiar voice call. Vi walked out from the side gate the kids had come through, and Ekko almost didn't recognize her.

She stood there in a pair of black trousers and a forest green sweater that made her look like the next words out of her mouth would be “would you like to be my neighbor?”. Her sleeves were rolled up to the elbows, one arm marked with ink while the other wasn’t. The kiddo waved her hands at Vi excitedly, practically jumping up and down. “N-no, honey. Not yet. I'll tell you when we're ready for that. Why don't you and Prema go back to playing with the others? Uncle Jayce is getting the grill running. Hotdogs will be ready soon.” Her eyes didn't leave Ekko.

The kids grabbed the ball and ran back to the side gate, but not before Isha ran back to Ekko, wrapping his leg in another hug. The kids scampered off, leaving the two of them standing there in awkward silence.

“Sorry I'm late.” Ekko said, finally breaking the silence.

“Man, you're here. That's all I care about.” Vi said, her face breaking out in a massive grin that made her a lot more recognizable. Her hair was resembling Silco’s short, slicked back look, with a bit more length and shag to it.

“You look good.” Ekko said with a shrug. “Seems like you're doing well.”

“Yeah, yeah I am.” Vi said, scratching the back of her head. “I uh, I've been sober three years now. Haven’t smoked even longer than that.” Vi chuckled nervously. “That uh… that girl with the brown hair? That's… that's my daughter, man. I mean, not yet technically. Right now she's technically a foster kid but… she's my daughter.”

“That's great.” Ekko said, kicking a rock with his boot. “I'm happy for you, man.” Vi just stared at him, swallowing before she spoke.

“Ekko, I'm so fucking sorry for how things went down.”

“I know you are. I knew it back then, Vi.” He stepped closer.

“We thought it made more sense to try and time things out. I wasn't reveling in stabbing you in the back, I just, fuck, we were just trying to be safe, be smart. I was worried about losing you if you found out about what we were. I know I should've trusted you, I should have told you, but the thought of you seeing me as some kind of freak or pervert terrified me. I can handle the whole world hating me, but you… man you're my brother. That wound could never heal.” Vi stepped closer. “I’m sorry. I'll say it a thousand times, and mean it. I never should have betrayed your trust, I should've talked it out and trusted you to understand me. Especially after everything we've been through.”

“The shit hurt, Vi. It really fucked with me, to think you were just playing me for some patsy. I felt like the world's biggest joke. You two are all I've got. It's hurt, not having you in my life, feeling like you didn't give a shit enough to even try and talk to me about this until I walked in on it.” Vi swallowed anxiously, but Ekko took another step toward her. “I gotta admit… I'm glad to see that at least it wasn't all for some stupid fling, some hot freaky just for the sake of the taboo… I think that's what really made me believe it was worth showing up again. If it was for something real… I don't know, it makes it easier to understand.”

“… I love her, Ekko. I love her with all my heart and soul. I don't think I’m made to be in a world without her in it.”

“I know, man. I was there and saw first hand how bad shit got when you didn't have her. Look at you, you look like some kind of PTA dad now.”

“I uh… kinda am. Y’know, the kindergarten equivalent of the pta but same shit.” Vi chuckled, but eventually her face fell back to being serious. “But I'm gonna be honest, I’d say the same about you… not wanting a world without you in it, I mean. Not the PTA shit. I’ve missed you, brother. As good as shit has been, it isn't the same without you around. ”

“You never called.”

“You told me not to.” Ekko smiled at Vi’s response and stepped closer.

“I did. And you respected that.”

“Of course. It was the least I could do.” They stood right in front of each other, Ekko and Vi looking each other square in the eye as he poked her in the sternum.

“Some shit like that never happens again, understood? No more secrets.”

“Never.” Vi swore.

“And listen man, before anything else, I gotta be sure. There's… there's nothing weird going on with the kid, right? Cus if there is…”

“If there was, I hope you'd do the world a favor, drag me out back, and put me down.” Vi assured. “No, there's nothing weird there and never will be. That's my daughter, man. And I know it doesn't make sense, but… me and Powder are different. Don't ask me to explain, cus I can't if I tried. Isha is family like you and Silco are family, like Jayce and Mel and Vik are family, not like Powder.”

“I just had to be sure, man.”

“I understand.” Vi assured, cracking a smile. “It's the exact kinda thing I’d expect from her uncle Ekko.”

Ekko pulled Vi into a hug. Vi wrapped her arms around his shoulder, a mass of white locs being stuffed in her face. She didn't give a shit. She did her best to try not to cry but the tears came anyway, dripping down her cheek into his hair. She could see a few blue and pink beads woven into his hair along with the lightning charms, and cried harder, a massive smile on her face.

“I love you, man.” Vi said.

“I love you too.” He replied. His voice cracked and he cleared his throat to try and hide it.

They stood there for God only knew how long, until an older woman walked up the sidewalk, a dog on a leash in her hands. “Is everything okay, Violet?” Vi waved, still in their awkward hug.

“Family moment, miss Habbernathy, everything’s fine!” She choked out. The two pulled apart as the sweet old lady nodded.

“Ah, I see. Sorry to interrupt!”

“No, it's okay. Uh, Isha’s birthday party is just getting started if you and the mister want to join.”

“Oh, no thank you sweetheart, but I appreciate the offer! Am I still watching Isha after school next Tuesday?”

“Yeah, if that still works! I gotta run Silco into the city.”

“That'll work just fine! The girl is an angel.” She waved goodbye and Vi wiped her cheek with the back of her hand as Ekko just laughed.

“I think you’ve finally been domesticated, man.” Vi laughed and punched him in the arm.

“You have no idea, dude. I'm fuckin cooked.” She shook her head and took a breath. “I'm out here making bag lunches, got a fuckin booster seat in the old rust bucket. I’m helping with a bake sale next month. Can you believe that shit? A fucking bake sale!”

“Oh my God, who are you and what did you do with my brother? What kind of fucking alien body snatcher finally got her?” He cackled and Vi wrapped her arm around his shoulder, eyes getting all misty again.

“God dammit, I missed you man.”

“Don't you fuckin start again or we’re never getting off this driveway.” Ekko said, also getting a bit misty. “Guess I should probably go say hi to everyone and get to properly meet my niece, huh?”

“Let's do it.” Vi said with a grin, pausing for a moment. “You know, there's uh… something I've been waiting to do until we were, you know, back in each other's lives. I was hoping maybe you'd be down to help me.” She pulled a ring box out of the pocket of her trousers.

“Man, I'm honored, but I don't like you like that.” Ekko joked, cackling like a dickhead as Vi groaned at the stupidity. “How is that gonna work? Proposing, I mean.”

“It's uh, not exactly a real proposal.” Vi said with a shrug. “You know, obviously we can't like, actually get married. But I mean…” she popped open the ring box, showing not a ring but two very neatly folded pieces of paper. She took one out gently and unfolded it to reveal “application for adoption” in big bold letters with the seal of the state of New Jersey. “We can be a family, in our own little fucked up way. We talked about the idea in abstract a couple years back, so she'll know what I'm asking. And I asked Isha a few months ago if she wanted us to be a family, permanently, and she couldn't calm down for hours, she was so excited. So… I just have to pop the question to Powder officially.”

“This is fucking insane, Vi.” He said, affectionately.

“I know, ain't it just?” Vi cackled back, folding that first slip back up.

Ekko looked at the second slip. “What's that, then?”

“Oh that… that's the ring.” Vi said, unfolding it to show a pair of tattoo designs. Whirring gears and sprockets, belts and pistons wrapping up one forearm, over top of a hand, and around the ring finger, while the second design followed the same placement with white and blue clouds. “I tricked Powder into designing them. Approached over email like I was a client, got the designs drafted from her, paid up front then just… conveniently didn't show for the appointment. She was pissed about a no show, but I knew she'd be more mad if I went to any other artist to design our wedding bands.”

Caitlyn can't help but laugh at that idea. “She had to know Powder saw right through that.”

“Oh absolutely. She designed those rings of theirs to the nines.”

“I’ve seen them… they aged well. Very lovely.” Cait sighed. Ekko stretched on the bench beside her, the sleeve of his jacket riding up to show the very edge of a blue and white cloud tattooed into his wrist.

“She told me later that same night. But that's getting ahead of myself, genuinely it was really sweet. Vi even got Isha to help with the proposal.”

Ekko was led back into the yard and saw a massive party. There were half a dozen kids all running around, reeking havoc while small gaggles of parents stood around the back porch, or sat around on thin plastic lawn chairs, or mingled in the kitchen.

Powder tackled him in a hug before he even saw her coming. How she was so stealthy with all that bright blue hair, Ekko could never understand.

“Oh my god, hi, Powder.” He choked out, the grip around his chest iron tight.

“Oh my God, Ekko I can't believe you're here!” She said as she finally released him, leaving him gasping for air. “I'm so sorry, I know I never got the chance to talk to you after, but please know that I-””Powder, Powder, we're fine.” Ekko interrupted, setting his hands on her shoulders. She was wearing a bright blue sundress and her nails were painted blue and green. “Vi and I talked things over. I… we're good. We're okay. All of us.”

Powder’s eyes welled up like she was about to start crying too, and she tackled him in another hug.

“Holy shit!” Jayce hollered as he walked over to join the fray. Vi nudged him and nodded toward several of the parents. “I mean uh… stay in school kids.” He yelled at the little gaggle of demons running past him at that moment. Powder and Ekko got up off the floor, with the help of Vi and Jayce. Jayce greeted Ekko with a more restrained hug. “Glad you could make it.” He said, clapping him on the back.

“Glad to be here.” Ekko said. Jayce stood there in linen pants and a button down that made him look like the definition of an uncle grilling up dogs in the summer. “Heard you were manning the grill tonight?”

“Hell yeah man. I got everything, burgers, dogs, veggie burgers, these weird tofu dogs, I got some portabellos grilling up right now too.”

“Shouldn't you be watching em, then?”

“Dude, those things have so much water in them, they're like impossible to burn.” He said, nodding toward the grill. “Care to join me on cool uncle duty?”

“Fuck it, why not.” Ekko said, Vi chuckled and grabbed a beer from the pack by the grill, cracking it open on the edge of the picnic table and handing it over to Ekko. “Ain't gonna throw off your little plans, is it Vi?” He whispered as he took the beer.

“Nope. Accounted for.” She looked around until she saw Isha and Prema sprinting around together away from the other kids. “Isha, honey!” The girls stopped and Isha looked to her dad. “Remember that special craft you wanted to do when uncle Ekko showed up?” Ekko watched the kid’s face split into a grin, and all Vi had to do was nod and the two went sprinting into the house.

Jayce looked between the two and smiled. “So tonight's the night?” He asked.

“Man, if you can think of a better occasion, tell me. Cus I'm pretty sure this is perfect.” Vi replied.

“For once, maybe you're right.” Jayce said.

They sat around, chewing the fat for a few minutes. Ekko got about halfway through his beer, catching his brothers up on the recent union vote, his life since he'd left, just about everything.

He finished the beer off and chucked it in a trash can, before speaking up.“I'm gonna hit the bathroom real quick.” Ekko said, walking toward the house.

“Be safe, don't fall in.” Jayce said, earning a well practiced eye roll.

God Ekko had missed them.

As he stepped out of the bathroom, and back into the living room area, Ekko’s eyes caught on a younger guy, maybe a couple years younger than him. He had short, messily coifed black hair. He was handsome, and one of the only people at the party that didn't look like he was going to whine at the PTA meeting about swearing.

He had old cargo pants on and a mostly clean T-shirt that seemed very well loved by how worn it was, plus silver gauges in his ears that matched a chain around his neck that complimented his familiar looking terra-cotta skin. What really caught Ekko's attention was his bright green eyes that searched over the living room. The next thing Ekko noticed was a long scar from halfway up his nose, ending just above his lip.

“Prema? Prema!” He called, looking around the living room, seemingly ready to move to the kitchen.

“I think she's with Isha. They're uh, working on some craft project.” Ekko said with a shrug. The man visibly relaxed, still seemingly tense. He stopped wandering, sticking his hands in his pockets and breathing out a sigh.

“Figures, should've guessed.” He said, chewing his cheek. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, of course. You her dad?” He nodded yes, but didn't say much else. He stood there, hands in his pockets, seemingly unbothered by the quiet of the room. “I like your tattoo.” Ekko said, very bothered by the silence. The man had a sprawling bat splayed out over his throat, wings wrapping up behind his ears. He smiled at that.

“Uh, Thanks. It's old as all hell, er, shit, I mean uh… sorry.”

“No worries, as long as Jayce is here I don't think you gotta worry about anyone noticing you swearing. Plus, I don't have a kid here, so I could give a shit less.” The man chuckled. “You got a name?”

“Sunil. Most just call me Scar, though.”

“That seems kinda fucked up.” Sunil laughed, leaning against the back of the couch.

“Yeah, it is, but better that than having to explain my name for the 50th fuckin time.” Ekko noticed a chain around Sunil’s neck, ending with two rings dangling against his sternum.

“You're telling me. My name's Ekko. The amount of times I have to tell people “no it's not spelled like the word” is the most petty ring of hell imaginable.” Prema ran down the stairs, past both of them, grabbing a box of art supplies off the living room table and immediately running for the stairs. She has Isha’s miner’s cap on her head, the chunky metal hat flopping around on her head with every step.

“Prema, laddoo, no running in the house…” she was already gone as Sunil was speaking. He sighed and dragged his hands down his face. “Her father was so much better at all this than I am.”

“Is he not here?”

“No, he uh… he passed away last year.” Sunil’s hand went to a pair of rings on the chain around his neck, fidgeting with them.

“I'm sorry to hear that.” Ekko said, settling beside him against the back of the couch. Sunil stiffened a bit, but didn't move away. He seemed to relax after a moment.

“It's been hard.” He said with a sigh. “He was the one who handled all of this stuff. The play dates, the PTA shit, socializing with all the stuffy assholes. I haven't got a clue what to do around them. It seems like every time I talk, something gets fucked up and misconstrued. It's easier to just try and stay out of the way.”

“I get that.” Ekko said, crossing his arms. “But I mean, I know the guys who live here, they're pretty alright. I don't think you'd have to worry about getting misunderstood by em.”

“Oh, Isha’s parents? They're nice enough, a little awkward though.”

“Yeah, Vi and Powder. I grew up with em. They're like family to me.”

“Oh, shit I uh, I meant awkward like-””- no you're fine, they're awkward as fuck around basically everyone but each other and Jayce. They're weird and they know it. But, y'know, they're pretty understanding about a lot of shit. Can't really afford not to be.” Ekko said. Sunil smiled and Ekko found his eyes drawn to the creases it made in the corners of his eyes. He was a handsome man, Ekko found himself thinking.

“I've been meaning to try and get to know them better. Isha is basically all Prema talks about at home. Literally not a day goes by where I don't hear some story about the kid. “Oh, Isha said the funniest thing.” “Isha taught me this fun new sign,” “Isha says that sign is actually a swear word so we can't use it anymore”.” He rolled his eyes and chuckled.

“Then why not get to know em?”

“Eh, I didn't want to risk fucking it up for her. I was worried about accidentally starting some shit, making them say they couldn't hang out anymore. Isha was the first friend she made after her father passed. I'd hate to ruin that for her.”

“I highly doubt that'll be an issue.” Ekko said, nudging Sunil with his elbow. “I was gonna go back out and hang with em. You're welcome to come along if you want.”

He chewed his cheek at the thought, and Ekko found his eyes drawn down to his lips before the man finally spoke up. “Fuck it. Why not?”

The two walked out to the back patio. In the far corner of the yard, a small gaggle of parents were mingling around chatting, while their strange little family was circled around the grill. Jayce and Vi stood at the helm, with Viktor, Silco, Mel and Powder in a semi-circle around them.

“You drink?” Ekko asked.

“Not tonight.” Sunil said.

“Vi, got a soda to spare?” Ekko asked as they joined the circle. Vi grabbed a cola from a pallet of them at the foot of the grill, popping the top off on the grill handle before handing it over. Ekko took it and handed it to Sunil, before taking his beer in hand. They smiled at each other, and Ekko noticed some red in Sunil’s cheeks. It suited him.

“Here ten minutes and you're already making friends.” Jayce said, hooking his arm over Ekko’s shoulder and lifting the lid to show off a roaring grill and several very well-cooked mushrooms. “Fuck.”

“Language, there's kids around man. Say fudge or I'm never gonna hear the end of it at the next meeting.” Vi reminded.

“Fucking fudge.” Jayce said, quickly removing the mushrooms with his hands. Vi rolled her eyes and Ekko spared a glance to Sunil, who was laughing at the chaotic scene.

“See what I mean?” Ekko asked.

“Oh, I'm seeing it.” Ekko and Vi exchanged a glance, Vi looking bewildered. Sunil looked at Vi too, gesturing toward the house. “Apologies in advance for whatever mess my daughter is helping make. Her and art supplies are a dangerous combination.”

“No worries, man.” Vi said, shocked at the amount of conversation already. “She’s helping Isha with a uh, project I think.” Powder looked at Vi confused, and Vi feigned ignorance, poorly. “You've got some good ink work.” Vi said, gesturing to his neck.

“Thanks. Got it when I was 17 and convinced I was gonna become a vet. It's faded to all hell by now.”

“It still looks good.” Powder said, patting him on the shoulder. “I mean a little touch up might be nice but the line work is holding up really well.”

“You know any good artists?” Sunil asked. Powder beamed at him.

“Yeah, me!” She beamed with pride. “Baby, come here, show him.” Vi chuckled and walked over, pulling her arm out of the sleeve to show off. “This gear pattern on her wrist was one of the first ones I'd ever done. Then this big ol mutt is some of my latest work.”

“Well damn.” Sunil said, taking a sip of his soda. “Got any space open any time soon?”

“Of course!” Powder said. “Don't even worry about paying. Cover the cost for the ink and we’ll call it even.”

“You sure?”

“Oh hush, it'll take me like an hour and a half, 2 tops. Don't worry about it. What kind of shading would you want, it seems like-” Ekko tuned out as they chattered over specifics, but Sunil and him made eye contact for a moment, the taller, younger man flashing him a tiny, nervous smirk that made Ekko’s mouth feel dry.

“Well well well, long time no see.” Viktor said, now beside Ekko, who quickly turned to face him, seeing him and Silco stood side by side. They both seemed in equal strength, meaning very little. They were pale and thin looking even compared to their baseline, and Silco’s hair had thinned and greyed considerably. “You're looking well, Ekko.”

“Ah, my dear man, wonderful to see you.” Silco said, patting Ekko on the shoulder. “I saw you in the news. Wonderful to hear about your plant’s vote.”

“Thanks, Silco. Yeah, management fought us hard on that. Brought in consultants and had meetings slandering us every couple days. But they still couldn't stop us.” Ekko beamed.

“Glad to hear the new generation has some fight in it.” Silco beamed. “So that was your salting then?”

“Yes sir.” Silco waved off the sir.

“Oh please, you're among fellow unionists. Leave that propriety somewhere they give a damn. I’d love to pick your brain on the state of the movement.”

“Anytime, old man.” Ekko said with a grin. Silco seemed to grumble at that, but Ekko paid it no mind. “How’ve you been, Vik?”

“Life carries on as ever. My research has made some promising progress, but, I've been trying to spend more time at home as of late.” He said, looking at Jayce and Mel fondly over Ekko’s shoulder.

“Wait, do y'all live around here now?” Ekko asked.

“Yes, in fact.” Viktor said.

“Mel is on the city council in Newark.” Jayce explained. “She's got a pretty nice house, and Vik was able to get a pretty nice gig at the university in town.”

“Well shit, I didn't realize the whole gang was so close.” Ekko admitted, wondering how much he'd missed.

“They only got settled in a few months back. Don't stress it.” Vi said, knocking the base of her bottle against Ekko’s. He looked at her, confused, and she smiled. “How'd Viktor put it… you’ve got a face with subtitles.”

Ekko grinned and shook his head.

“Whatever, man. You're one to talk.” Ekko found his eyes tracing back to Sunil, who was now chatting away with Powder about a dozen different tattoo ideas. His smile was wide, and easy, with those same scrunched up smile lines in the corners of his eyes.

“You know he's single.” Vi whispered to him. He looked at her, a bit shocked. “Subtitles.”

Ekko rolled his eyes again. “He's a widow, man. That's different.”

“Dude, you've gotten him to say more in a few minutes than I've heard from him in almost a year.”

“... You think I'd have a shot?” Ekko asked.

“He's looked over at you every like, 10 seconds since you two got here. Yeah, I think you’ve got a shot.” Vi said, hooking her arm around his shoulder.

Ekko looked over to Sunil and, feeling bold, shot him a wink. He swallowed, and winked back. He clearly wasn't practiced with it, it was a little awkward and dorky, but in a cute way.

He smiled and looked back to Vi.

“I missed you man.” Vi said, hugging him closer, knocking their skulls together.

“I missed you too.” Ekko said, lifting his bottle toward her. “To old friends.”

“And new beginnings.” Vi said, clinking the neck of her bottle against his. He smacked the base of his against the top of hers and laughed as she scrambled not to spill any on herself.

“Oh my God you two never change.” Powder giggled out, now stood across from Vi in their little circle.

“Maybe that's a good thing, sometimes.” Ekko offered, drinking from his beer.

“Hey, change can be good too.” Vi said, her cola abandoned in the lawn. It was her lawn, who gave a shit? She had a knowing grin on her face, and her eyes settled on Powder.

Ekko saw Isha and Prema run out, a folded up piece of posterboard in Isha’s hands. Vi nodded her head in their direction, and Isha moved through the people.

Silco saw them moving and looked to Vi, an eyebrow raised. Vi just smiled back at him, giving the tiniest nod.

“Hey, babygirl?” Vi said, getting Powder’s attention from her chit chat with Mel and Sunil. Most of the rest of their little circle had their attention turn to Vi, interest piqued by the strange tension in her voice. “Remember our talk after the museum?”

“Y-yeah?” Powder replied, confused.

“Good. I uh, I think Isha has something she's trying to show you.”

Behind Powder, displayed between Prema and Isha like a little banner, the piece of posterboard had been decorated with pink and blue flowers in marker and crayon, with big black block letters that said “Will you merry dad?”.

Powder, face creased in confusion, turned back to Vi to find her on one knee, a fucked up ring box that held no ring in hand. “What do you say? Make me the happiest butch in the world?”

Powder let out a squeak that Ekko still couldn't believe was possible with a human voice box, tears welling in her eyes as she shook her head furiously up and down.

“Yeah?” Vi asked, confirming the obvious. Powder bounced up and down in place.

“Yes, yes, of course, a thousand times yes!” Vi jumped up and wrapped Powder in her arms, lifting her up by her waist and spinning her around as the family around them celebrated. Jayce wolf whistled and clapped, most just cheered.

Mel and Vik fawned over Powder the moment she was back on her feet, excitedly gushing as they looked at the designs for the wedding tattoos.

Silco picked Isha up with some effort and rested her on his hip.

“I suppose spelling homework will be the next priority, eh?” He asked.

It was a weird, fucked up little family, but it was his. And Ekko wouldn't have it any other way.

Caitlyn looks at Ekko, brows knit together in contemplation.

“You gonna tell me what's got your mind turning a mile a minute over there, Caity-Cat?” Ekko asks, looking at his watch. “Shit, I'm running late. I told Vi I'd be there twenty minutes ago.”

He goes to stand, but she grabs his wrist.

“Ekko, I need to tell you something about Vi. She's doing something foolish, and I think you're the only person who can convince her to get her head out of her ass. But if you can't… it could cost me everything.”

Ekko looks at her, swallows, and sits back down.

EKKOEkkoekko: Guys, I need you to get to the hospital, now.
MelMedardaEsq: Is everything okay? Did something happen?
MajorLeagueJayceball: Ek?
MajorLeagueJayceball: Ekko, c'mon man, what's going on?
EKKOEkkoekko: Just get your asses down here. We need to talk some sense into Vi. She's lost her fucking mind and I need backup.
MelMedardsEsq: Oh god
MajorLeagueJayceball: We’ll be there in half an hour.

Chapter Text

Vi looks at her phone, fidgeting in her seat as she sees how late in the day it's getting. Ekko was supposed to be there more than an hour ago.

She was starting to worry that something could have happened to him, horrors running through her head. It could be a car crash on the freeway, a blown tire sending him swerving into oncoming traffic, a million different ways her brother could be dead. She can practically hear the crunching of the metal, worrying her thumb along the inside of the palm of her hand, when she hears a knock at the door.

She jumps up and pulls the curtain aside, showing not just one familiar face, but three. She opens the door, and Mel, Jayce, and Ekko all step in.

“Hey, guys, I thought you all weren't coming until tomorrow?” Vi asks as Ekko clicks the door closed behind them. “What’s going on?” She looked around between the three of them, her eyes settling on Ekko as he stepped forward.

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Vi looked at him, confused. “Man, you gave me your word when I came back, no more secrets.” Ekko says, watching as Vi’s jaw clenches in time with her realization.

“God damnit, Cait.” She mutters to herself. She goes to storm out of the room, but Ekko grabs her, pulling her right back.

“Don't you be mad at Cait. You're the one acting like a goddamn fool.” Ekko said, poking her in the sternum. “What, you just thought that we'd all not notice you fucking dying until it was too late?”

“Fuck off, Ekko. I'm not having this conversation with you, not right now.” She tries to move for the door again, but Ekko shoves her back into her chair.

“Ekko, maybe we should-” Jayce was cut off by Mel laying a hand on his shoulder.

“You're not fucking running from me, Vi. You're so fucking determined to die, than sit here and fucking explain it. Don't be mad at me for making you face your own actions.” Ekko drags his hands down his face. “I can’t believe you would do this to me, to Isha, to all of us!”

“Fuck you! Don't you dare bring my daughter into this.” Vi shoots back up.

“You brought her into this! You don't get to be a selfish prick when you're a parent, God damnit. What the fuck are Isha and I supposed to do without you? What, not enough to lose Powder, we gotta lose you too?”

“I’m fucking lost either way!” Vi exclaims. “What the fuck am I supposed to do Ekko? Go to treatment? Make everyone watch one more fucking person we love rot away in the hopes that I’ll be the one to make it when no one else did? How many people have we watched go through that same process? Pops, Dad, Powder, Vik, now me too?”

“Do not use Viktor’s death to try and justify this.” Jayce said through grit teeth. “I love you, but
If you go down that route, things aren’t going to end well.” Vi takes a breath, looking at her boots in shame.

“I… I’m sorry, man. But still, I'm not subjecting Isha to another God damn round of watching someone wither away and die.”

“That's a crock of shit, Vi.” Jayce says. “So you want her to just watch you die fast than? You're a lot of things, but you're not that stupid. Be honest, you don't want to stay with her gone.”

“No fucking shit, boy detective! Brilliant deductive skills.” Vi exclaims, arms out at her sides in exasperation. “Fucking revaltory! A mind for the history books.”

“I’m trying to help you you dumb son of a bitch. You don't need to be a dick.”

“You come barging in here yelling at me while my wife is fucking dying and have the stones to call me a dick?” Vi snasp back.

“You're fucking killing yourself, Vi. You expect us to patiently wait while you do it?” Ekko points out.

“No, Ekko, I'm not. I'm just letting God's sick fucking joke be done. I'm making a god damn choice because for once, I get to. So much of my life was carved out by the fucked up choices of others, well for once in my God damned life I'm making the calls, and this is the call I've made.” Vi snaps, about to spout something else when a coughing fit takes her.

She barks out cough after cough into her hand, her body trying to expel the masses that had grown in the pits of her desperation, but they refuse to come out. She hacks and hacks until blood drips into her palm and between her fingers. She crumbles, bracing against the hospital bed as the other three brace around her, afraid and unsure of what to do next.

Vi falls to her knees, still barking out a cough as a mud stained knife falls from her pocket, clattering across the tile floor. Her hand desperately clutches for Powder's, but it doesn't help. She whimpers out the last few painful barks, panting for breath as she pulls her hand away, dripping with blood, her face is covered in it from the top of her cheeks, just below her eyes, all the way down her chin. When Vi finally looks at them, still clutching Powder’s hand, she's burst a blood vessel in one eye from the pressure of the cough.

“Call me whatever you want, stupid, selfish, I don't care. I'm dying how I choose. I'm dying me, I'm dying hers.” Silence fills the room as the three left standing look at each other. Mell steps forw

“Vi, no matter when you die, you'll die hers. We all know that.” Mel knelt down beside her. “You won't be apart forever. Just enough to give you some time.”

“And make her wait longer?” Vi asks, her voice cracking, tears dripping through the blood on her cheeks. “Haven't we had to wait enough?”

“Think about Isha, Violet. Her and Prema will be getting married someday. Don't you want to be there? You and Powder had a parent at your wedding, doesn't Isha deserve the same?” Vi looks up at her, blood still dripping down her face.

“But why me? Why do I get to stay?” Vi asks, as if the very thought hurt her. “What the fuck have I done but try to ruin myself? I spent so much of my life trying to run from the fact that I missed her, in all the wrong ways. I brawled, smoked, and drank myself blind, just to stop seeing that she wasn't there. I did every single god damned thing wrong, and I'm the one who gets to live? I’m the one who has to stick around? Powder was smart, the only shit she did wrong was stuff outside of her control, being raised in a toxic dump and then being pumped full of pills by a family that wanted a child but didn't want to raise a fucking kid.” Vi ran her thumb along Powder’s knuckles, looking at the body with a bloodied eye full of love and regret. “She should be here, I should be the one in this fucking bed.”

“But you're not.” Jayce said. “You're here, and Isha needs you. Fuck, we need you, man.” Jayce knelt down on Vi’s other side. “We can't lose you too, especially not Isha.” Vi looked at him for a long moment, before staring back at Powder’s hand.

“Isha will be okay. She can sell the shop, the house is paid off. She'll have a home, and more than enough to pay for the rest of her school and getting her life started. If she sells the house she can start a life just about anywhere. She has you guys, and Prema, and Sunil… she has so much more than I had at her age. I've done the best I can, but I've made up my mind. Please, just… So much of my life was decided for me, let me choose this.”

Ekko and Jayce look to each other, and to their mutual horror they realize that they would. They knew what this meant to Vi, knew how desperately she wanted them to just give her this, and for all the shit they'd ever given each other, they couldn’t say no to their brother making such a genuine plea for mercy.

Were things different, they might have left it there, heartbrokenly accepting that this was a point Vi, in all her bull-headedness, couldn't be swayed from.

But, there's a strange compassion in cruelty, a compassion and love in being willing to care for someone in the way they need most, but want the least. Mel picks the pocket knife off the ground, decade-old mud stains worn into the wood handle.

“Violet,” Mel began, she doesn’t respond. “Violet, please look at me.”

Reluctantly, she does, one white and one blood red eye settling against the soft gold of her own. One day, she'll admit to thinking of Isha’s as Mel spoke.

“You asked me a question, once, a long time ago in my car. I didn't have an answer for you then. Do you remember that?” Mel stuffs the folded up knife into Vi’s hands. Horror strikes Vi deep in the pit of her heart. Mel can see it in the fear and the tears gathering in her eyes. She tries to look away, but Mel grabs her by the bloodied chin, forcing her to look her in the eyes. Gold stares back at bloodied powder blue.

“Mel, please, don't.” Vi whimpers out, her voice cracking.

“Do you have your answer?” Mel releases her chin, allowing Vi to look at the blood on her hand, the blood on the bedspread below her. She looks at her reflection in the blackened screen of the bedside computer, blood dripping down from below her eyes. The monitor's reflection is strange and warped, leaving Vi alone, bloodied and raw between two pillars of empty black screen, a blade in her bloodied hands.

“Yes.” Vi replies in a horrified whisper.

“What is it, dear?” Mel asks, cruelty beyond cruelty in the name of love and family and everything so messily in between the two.

“More than anything in the world.” Vi says, staring at her own reflection in desperate horror. “I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” She chokes out, collapsing back onto her ass, her back against the hospital bed as she throws the dagger away and wipes the blood from her face.

The knife remains discarded on the floor as Mel pulls her into a hug. Vi clings to the pristine white of her dress, bloodied hands smearing it, but Mel just hugs her back. Ekko and Jayce pull them into a tangle of limbs and tears. Vi promises to go to treatment. They promise not to leave her, they promise to be there for her to the bitter end.

That promise wasn’t needed. It had always been a given, but it’s reiterated again and again from each of them to the others.

A very nice, very underpaid nurse is convinced to bring a few extra cots to the room and look the other way about how cramped it's gotten.

They stay with her. The evening wears away into the night, and one by one they fall asleep on their cots.

Mel is the first to fall asleep, so it makes sense she's the first to wake up. She initially just goes to the bathroom, but after she walks back out, she settles into the chair beside Vi, still sat at Powder’s bedside, thumb worrying over her knuckles.

“Shouldn't you get some sleep?” Mel asks, crossing her legs.

“I will eventually. I've been crashing around 4 the last few days.” Vi admits, looking at the bright red LEDs that say 2:03 AM.

“Isha will be here today, it'd be good to be rested.” Mel says, trying her best to be supportive.

“She flies in at noon. I'll have some sleep by then. Besides, it doesn't really help one way or another. I want to take what time I have.”

“I understand.” Mel says. “When Viktor was passing, Jayce and I would take shifts, making sure he was never alone.”

“I remember. You both looked like hell.” Vi admits.

“I can't say you're doing much better… I'm sorry, dear. I hope you know that. I'm sorry that you have to go through all of this alone.” Vi rests her free hand on Mel’s.

“I'm not alone… I think in all the chaos, I forgot about that.” Vi sighs out. “I’m sorry for being such a jackass, for making you all worry.”

“Mistakes are human. I'm just glad you're finally seeing reason.” Mel pulls the old knife from her pocket and offers it. “Can I trust you with this?”

Vi's looks at it and sighs. “I think it's time I gave that old thing up. Would you… can you hold onto it until Isha gets here? Give it to her.”

“Of course.” She puts the knife back in the pocket of her dress. “Have you thought about what you're going to say to her?”

“I’ve been trying not to… Isha knows this routine. She's lived through it more than any kid should. Silco, Viktor… But it's different when it's her mom. All I can do is try to be there for her. She'll tell me what she needs. She learned that from her mother.”

“Clearly.” Mel says, and Vi actually chuckles. “Have you made arrangements? Jayce and I will be happy to help with anything we can.”

“Powder already did. She had everything ready, and I didn't even know… I think she knew I was never going to be able to accept that we needed to make those plans, so she made them for me.” Vi admits, shame inching into her voice.

“There's nothing wrong with wanting to hope. When Viktor was passing, Jayce… he’d sit there with him, telling him over and over that this would just be another bad stint. That the treatment would take, he'd get better, it'd all just work out. Viktor would nod along, assuring him that he was right, but I don't think either of them really believed it.”

“So why play the whole game?”

“Because there's some things we do for the ones we love, things that are stupid and foolish and don't change a thing, but we do them because we feel better for it. What’s life, but a performance devoted to making those we care about happy?”

“Dad always used to say life is a fight to leave the world better than you found it.” Vi says with a sigh. “I don't really know if I managed to do that. I think Ek was a lot more of what he hoped I would grow into. A good, honest union man who fights the good fight and makes people’s lives better. Not some petty bourgeois prick who owns an auto shop.”

“I think Silco was proud of you. Besides, it seems like Isha has taken up that mantle for the both of you.” Vi chuckles and nods.

“Sure does. That girl’s gonna raise hell like none other once she's out in the world properly.”

“And you'll be right there to see it all.” Mel assures with a squeeze of Vi’s hand.

“You're a good actor.”

“We both know that's not true.”

“You're a politician.”

“And I've been stuck in the same role for nearly 20 years now. That's not a great sign.”

“It's cus you're too honest for your own good. You and Jayce both.” Mel smiles at that, nudging Vi with her elbow.

“So you admit, I'm a terrible liar. Thus, I must be telling the truth.” Vi shakes her head with a weak smile.

“Fine, fine. You win. I believe that you believe I'll beat this.”

“It's not about winning, Vi. Family isn't a competition.”

“It's a team sport.” Vi completes the saying with a sigh.

“Exactly.”

They sit in a comfortable silence for a while, the only sounds being the snoring of the two men on their cots, and the respirator keeping Powder alive.

Tomorrow, after Vi, Isha, and everyone says their final goodbyes, it'll be turned off, and Powder with it. Vi has been reassured a thousand times that she won't feel it, that there's nothing left to even feel the pain, but she still doesn't know if she believes it.

“Violet, can I ask you something?”

“Gimme everything you got.”

“I don't want this to come across as cruel or rude, but… if you could do it all again, would you change anything?”

“You mean would I still fall in love with her?”

“... Yes.”

“Yes, a thousand times out of 999, yes. I'd do it all over again, go through every hardship, every heartbreak a thousand times if it meant just one more day with her.” Vi confirms, rubbing Powder’s knuckles. She pauses for a long second, before continuing. “If you're meaning sonething bigger picture, in some version of the world where we got to grow up together, be a normal ass family, be normal sisters… I honestly can't tell you.” Vi admits with a shrug.

She pauses for a long while, staring at Powder, chewing the inside of her cheek. Finally, she begins again. “I think part of me wants to believe that if we’d been together as kids, we could've been normal. Part of me wants to believe that there's some alternate universe where things worked out for me with Cait or Lest, where Powder found some nice girl to take care of her and we could just be sisters... But then I think about how beautiful she was on our wedding night, how happy I've been with her… I think about Isha, and the idea of her just being my niece… fuck it makes my heart hurt.” Vi wipes a tear from sore eyes, one still blood red. “That's my little girl, man, my daughter. Powder's… Powder is the best thing that ever happened to me. She's my wife. I can't comprehend a world where the two of them are anything other than that and I'm still happy.” Mel squeezes Vi’s hand, and Vi just takes a minute, letting the feelings rush over her.

It's several minutes before she speaks again. “I don't know if I really believe in soul mates, but if they're real, I think Powder is mine. My soul has only ever been able to rest easy next to hers, and I can't imagine a universe where that isn't true.”

Mel squeezes her hand, and Vi squeezes back.

“I'm glad that I gave you two a second chance.” Mel says, because what else could she say.

“I am too. Powder adored you, I hope you know that.”

“I do. She never could hold that kind of affection back. Neither of you could.” Vi smiles at that.

“Got us there… when me and her were young, mom would always tell us “there's love in this world, if you're willing to fight for it.” Guess if you're willing to fight for something, you don't tend to be quiet about it.” Vi starts to tear up again, pulling her hand from Powder’s to wipe it away. Mel squeezes her hand, and Vi squeezes back. It's not the same, but it's a comfort that helps in its own way.

Isha arrives the next morning far earlier than she should've. She storms out of the elevator, Prema right behind her, the two joined at the hand. Isha, for all the blood connection she lacked to Violet and Powder, ended up looking so much like them both. It wasn't just the blue hair dye that she hadn't redone in several weeks, leaving her with clear brown roots in her hair. No, she turned out tall and slender like her mother, but that didn't stop her from growing into a strong proud butch just like her father. Isha Dollanganger was all heavy boots and cotton tank tops, draped in an old denim jacket with a wool blanket lining. Her sleeves were rolled up to her elbows, showing her right wrist wrapped in pink, blue and white clouds.

Her hair was a wavy mess that reminded Mel so much of Violet’s hair at the worst of her spiral, even tucked under a ballcap bearing the logo of her uncle’s union local. Her honey gold eyes had her mother’s same curiosity, even with the signature Dollanganger eye bags under them. When the door to the hospital room was flung open, she and Prema nearly tripped over the cots on the floor.

Violet was up in an instant, as Isha just stared at Powder laying in the bed. The tears started as Vi wrapped her in a hug, blocking her view.

“Isha, honey, your flight wasn't supposed to get here for another 3 hours.”

“I couldn't convince her to wait.” Prema pipes up. “She was adamant that we drive and get here as soon as possible.” She explains, standing awkwardly to the side. Her eyes settle on Powder, and Violet holds an arm out. Prema joins the hug.

“Thank you, dear, for making sure she got here safe.” Vi says to Prema.

“Of course.”

Vi kisses Isha’s forehead as the child sobs into her shirt. Prema tries her best to be a rock for her butch, but she's only human.

“It's okay, sweetheart. Let it all out.” Vi hums. By then, all three of Isha’s uncles and aunts are awake and up. Vi nods to the door, asking for the room. They nod and leave them be. Mel taps Prema on the shoulder, and Prema separates herself from them both to step out.

The last thing Vi hears before the door closes is Ekko wrapping Prema in his arms as Mel offers to buy Prema breakfast.

Vi just holds Isha for a long time. The sobbing just keeps coming, from the both of them, but they have each other. “It's okay Ish. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere.” She promises.

A dagger digs into a familiar pit in her chest as Isha clings to her tattered old shirt, guilt bleeding into her that she ever meant to give up on her child. She can be better, she will be better. If she has to dig herself out of the pits of hell, she'll do it to be there for her daughter as long as she possibly can.

Eventually, Isha’s sobbing slows, her fingers dig less desperately into the faded blue fabric of Vi’s shirt, Isha pulls back a bit.

“What happens now?” Isha asks with her shaking hands. Vi sits her on the cot across from her chair.

“Well, the doctor’s run all the tests we can, and we've confirmed that… mom isn't in there anymore. Her brain stopped working the night we got here. I wanted them to wait to do anything until you were here, but now that you are, well… we're gonna take whatever time we need, however long you want, and then once we've said our goodbyes, they're going to turn off that machine over there, and her heart will just… stop.”

Isha looks at her mother for a long moment, and then looks to her father. “Will it hurt her?” she signs out slowly, hands still shaking.

Vi, with all her doubts, with all her fear, does what any good father does, and pretends to be certain. “No, honey. Mom is gone, gone-gone. There's not even working nerves left to transmit a pain signal. She's gonna pass, peacefully and surrounded by the people she loves. But not a moment before you’ve taken as much time as you need. If you want to stay here all day and all night, we will. I won't leave your side. I'm not going anywhere.” Isha nods, and Vi wipes a tear from her cheek. Isha looks her in the eyes, pointing to one of her own, asking what happened to her eye. “That's not important right now, honey.”

“Bullshit.” She signs out. “What aren't you telling me? You've got that guilty fucking look on your face.”

Vi swallows and lets out a shaky breath.

A face with subtitles.

“Isha, I… I went to the doc last week, and they found some growths in my lungs.” Isha’s face goes blank and stoney in a way that is more terrifying to Vi than anything in the world. When Isha stands up, wheels around and kicks over a cot with a wordless scream, it's a relief.

The metal bends and breaks as Isha stomps it under her boots. “Isha, honey, please, just listen to me.” Vi wraps her arms back around Isha from behind, pulling the struggling kid back from the mangled cot. Isha breaks free, facing Vi, rage and betrayal gouged into her face.

“You fucking liar!”

“I wasn't lying, Ish. I meant it, I'm not going anywhere. I called the clinic this morning, I start treatment in a couple days. It's the same kind Grandad had, but we caught it a lot earlier, They said I've got a real shot.” Vi desperately tries to explain. Isha chucks her hat against the far wall and lets out a strangled sound of exasperation, running her hands through her hair. “I'm so sorry, Ish. I know this is so much to have to deal with all at once. I wanted to find a way to tell you better.”

Isha just paces back and forth across the room, dragging her hands down her face, than sticking them in her pockets, then back to combing them through her hair.

“I'm moving back.” Is all she signs when she finally stops.

“Ish, no. You've got a life of your own you're building, you don't have to do that.” Vi tries to assure.

“Fuck that, you're going to need help around the house, just like grandad did. I'm moving back.” She repeats the last three signs slow and punchy, emphasizing the certainty of every one.

“You have Prema, Ish.”

“You had mom!” She signs back, the anger visible in her flailing limbs.

“That was different and you know it.”

“I. Do not. Fucking. Care.” Isha signs out.

“Well I do, young lady. You’re going to school, you've got a good career ahead of you. You have so much more going for you than your mom or I ever had at your age. You're not derailing all that for my sake.”

“I'm not spending what could be the last few years of your life fucking off in some school!”

“Well I’d hope you're not fucking off in school to begin with!”

Isha just glares at her, even as she tries to repress a groan. “Don't try to make me laugh right now, I'm pissed at you.”

“Tough shit, kid. Thems the dad rules. I raised your ass, now you get to listen to my shitty jokes.”

“... God damnit, you completely threw off my fucking train of thought.” Isha signs out, returning to her pacing.

“What kind of language are they teaching you at that school?” Vi asked, seeing Isha roll her eyes.

“School? Don't sell yourself short, I learned most of these from you.”

“I don't think I even knew half those signs.”

“Then how did you know they were swears?” Isha raises a brow questioningly as she signs, and Vi is struck by just how much she acts like her mother.

“You got me there.” Vi tries to smile, but their little moments of respite comes to an end. She wipes her cheek with her hand and takes a breath. “Listen, Ish, I really mean it. I don't want you to drop out just because of me. Go to school, get your degree, make something of your life that me and your mother could've never dreamed of.” Isha sighs and shakes her head.

“I can go back to school. I can't come back to you forever.”

“I know, but that's life, kiddo.”

“Yeah, well not mine. I'm finishing this semester then I'm transferring back to a state school.”

“Jersey State isn't a school that'll win you a lot of big gigs as a librarian.”

“You have no idea how library sciences work. How the fuck would you know?”

“... Smartass.”

“Learned it from the best.”

“Yeah, you learned that from your mother.”

“Sure did.”

Vi sighs and signs to her daughter. “There's no convincing you, is there?”

“Nope.”

“... Stubborn asshole.” Vi signs.

“Guess who I learned that from.”

Vi smiles at her daughter. “I love you, kiddo.”

“I love you too.”

“... I hope you know that your mother and I are, were, and will always be so fucking proud of you.” Vi pats her on the shoulder, cupping her cheek in the other hand. “If the only trace I ever leave on this earth is you, I would be damn happy with that.”

“You stole that from grandad.” Isha signed, pausing midway through to wipe tears off her cheek.

“Yeah, yeah I did.” Vi says, wiping her cheek. She pauses for a long moment, looking Isha in the eye. “Ish, when I was your age I was convinced that God either didn't exist, or was some sick bastard. I’d gone through so much, and I really believed that if there was any God in this world, he had to be some kind of bastard like the old Greek ones, who just revelled in misery or didn't care enough to stop it... Then your mom ended up back in my life, and I kinda cooled down on giving a shit about God one way or another. Then you showed up.” Vi chews her cheek and sighs. “I still don't really know if I believe in God one way or another. I don't really know if I care. But if he's real, in that all knowing, all seeing way they say he is… well, he can't be all bad. Because you're here. Because you're my kid, and I got the be your dad, and nothing in my life has ever made me prouder. I'm so fucking proud of the butch you’ve grown into. I need you to know that the last words me and your mother spoke to each other was about how proud of you we are, and how much we love you.”

Isha’s lip quivered, and she tackled Vi in a hug. “I love you, kiddo.” Vi whispers as Isha shakes in her arms. She doesn’t need to see Isha sign it back. She feels it in the squeeze of her daughter's arms around her.

The others come back eventually. Prema hugs Isha close, kisses her cheeks, and runs her thumb along Isha’s unscarred knuckles as the others pour in around her.

When Powder passes, she doesn't go alone. She has her daughter's hand in hers on one side, her husband's on the other, and her family surrounding her. There are no good ways to die, but there are many far, far worse than that.

Vi paced around the tent that was acting as her dressing room for the evening.

“Relax man, it’s going to go great.” Ekko assured from a stool off to the side. His shoes were polished to a mirror shine, his suit pressed and pristine, and his salmon pink tie was fastened perfectly. They'd set up a mirror on one side of the tent, and Vi felt worse about how she looked with every glance.

“Jesus, this suit fits me like shit.” Vi groaned, her perfectly fine suit sitting completely normally on her frame.

“You getting cold feet?” Jayce asked, matching Ekko and Vi to a t in his own suit.

“Not exactly like she can back out of this relationship.” Ekko half-whispered.

“That'd make the family reunions awkward.” Jayce joked, nudging Ekko with his elbow.

“I'm going to kill you both, I swear. I'm gonna make it look like a bloody accident.” Vi adjusted her tie, and it looked a bit better, but she still felt out of place.

“Dude, you look good. You're going to work yourself into a conniption at this rate.”

“Y'all are sure everything is set up?” Vi asked, looking between them.

“Priest is ready and very, very well lied to.” Jayce confirmed.

“Silco is taking care of your flower girl, and I made sure the DJ and catering are all set.” Ekko responded.

“Are you sure you and Sunil are okay looking after Isha this weekend?” Vi asked.

“Of course, man. The house is already prepped, and Isha and Prema are stoked to get to have a mega-sleepover.” Ekko chuckled, standing up and patting Vi on the shoulder. “Relax, man. This is going to go great. Take a breath, and remember why you're here. Shit won't matter once you're out there.”

“I know I just… we didn't have a lot of time to plan for this. We had to rush to be absolutely certain Silco and Vik could be here. I just don't want anything to go wrong. It's her special day.”

“I can guarantee, as long as you're there when she walks down the aisle, she could not give a shit less about anything else.” Ekko said.

Vi took a breath. “You're right. You're right.” She caught another glimpse of herself in the mirror and immediately started taking off her suit jacket. “Fucking hell, I look good awful in this.”

Jayce and Ekko tussled with her, trying to get her to knock it the fuck off, when they heard a tired pair of chuckles from the entrance to the tent. Viktor and Silco stood, the first with a cane in one hand, the second with his crutch. They both wore their same usual waistcoats, slacks and button downs, seemingly unneeding to change for the occasion given how they always dressed to the nines. Viktor had at least changed colors, wearing white slacks and shoes with a powder blue tie and vest.

“You are your fathers’ child, Violet. Both of them.” Silco said, something draped over his free arm. From the shimmer of it, it looked like leather, freshly polished. He stepped closer, swatting at Ekko and Jayce with his cane to part them. “Connel had quite a similar tantrum before his wedding to your mother, and Vander, well he refused to wear a suit at all for our ceremony. They were so much less formal in our day. Then again, we had ours long before they actually counted for anything legally.” He chuckled and undid the last button on her suit jacket. “Go on, I think I have something you'll find more fitting.”

Vi took the jacket off. He pointed to her waist coat, and she removed it as well, left in just a powder blue tie, a white button down, black slacks and her best polished boots. “Put your arms out, boy.”

Vi did as instructed, and Silco slipped a vest over her arms, patting the leather down, smoothing it all out and fastening it at the front. He adjusted her tie, and looked her over.

“Lads, what do you think?”

“Looks good. The back patch is fun.” Ekko said, finger tapping his chin thoughtfully.

“Little “heavy metal” for a wedding don't you think?” Jayce asked, hands on his hips in a way that screamed Mel.

“I like it. It feels very… Violet.” Viktor assured. Vi looked over her shoulder at the mirror, greeted by a glimpse of the Cerberus heads on the back panel. Otherwise, it was a simple leather vest. It fit her better than her suit’s waistcoat, if nothing else.

“Vander held on to this ratty old thing for so long… I thought perhaps it might find some use today. I might have had it altered a bit, based on the measurements of your suit, but…” Silco said, standing beside Violet, looking into the mirror with her. “What do you think?”

“I… I love it. Thank you, dad.” Vi turned to face the mirror fully. Silco rested a hand on her back.

“Of course, dear boy. And don't fret, Isha is not being neglected. She may, however, have made a bit of an… adjustment to her flower girl attire when I was fetching this from the car.”

Vi chuckled and shook her head. “Unsalvageable?”

“Quite the opposite. I think it's rather fitting.” he said with a chuckle. “However, I want to take some time to gloat about the fact I was correct to pack a pair of trousers for her, just in case. She said she wanted to dress like her father.” He smiled at Violet and patted the place his hand had settled on her back.

“Fine, I'm sorry I called you silly for packing her two outfits.” Vi admitted, shaking her head.

“No apologies necessary.” He took a single blue silk pocket square from his own waist coat and tucked in into Vi’s pocket. “Just in case.”

Vi wrapped her arm around Silco’s neck, a strange, awkward little hug as they just stared in the mirror.

“Thank you for being here. I… I know this has to be so fucking strange.”

“Violet my dear boy, life is strange, and love most of all. Yet, we all fall to it eventually. Are you happy?”

“I'm terrified.” Vi admits. “But God, yes, I… I can't imagine being happier.” Silco chuckled at that.

“The fear will pass.” He assured. “But the love will remain. It remains so much longer than you ever expect it to.” He looked at her, at the vest, and sighed. “You do look so terribly like your fathers.”

“Do you think they'd be proud of me?”

“I think you have better things to ponder than the expectations of ghosts, dear boy. But I hope you never doubt that I’m proud of you.”

Vi looked at herself in the mirror, eyes tracking down to the blue and white clouds wrapping over the back of her hand. There's a blank space in the middle of the band of ink on her ring finger.

The ceremony was small. It had to be. It was a small plot in the forest a few states over that Powder had insisted on, and Vi could never say no to her. It couldn't fit many people, and that was fine because there weren't exactly an overflowing number of people they could invite in the first place, outside of their little family.

A few of the neighbors and parents from the PTA had been invited, just as ignorant to exactly what was going on as the priest standing at Vi’s side was. As far as any of them knew, Vi and Powder were just a normal couple. As far as the priest was concerned, they had eloped years ago and didn't need anything actually officiated, but needed that to stay hush hush for the sake of “appearances”. He was a nice guy, and assured them he wouldn't say a thing with a wink and nudge.

The sun was setting in the distance, and a few very good friends had spent several long hours that morning stringing lights between the trees, bathing their tiny little camp with warm golden light. Ekko and Jayce stood behind Vi under a tiny altar, her best man and sole groomsman respectively. Viktor and Mel stood ready on the other side of the aisle. Mel wore a lovely blue dress and the gold of her makeup looked stunning.

Sunil sat alone on the front row, three empty seats in his vicinity. Two of them were meant to be empty, the ones meant for Silco and the little Flower Butch. However, the one seat empty to Sunil’s right was not in fact intentional.

Vi leaned over and whispered to Ekko. “I wonder where Prema went.” Ekko chuckled and patted her on the back, managing to peel his eyes off of Sunil for the first time that day. Vi supposed she was learning that Ekko liked seeing his man in a suit.

“I've got a guess.” He whispered back as the music began to play. Vi swallowed and stood at attention at the altar, finally forced to stop fiddling with the blue fabric of her tie.

“Vi, I need you to breathe. I'm not carrying your ass if you pass out.” Ekko whispered in her ear.

Right, she'd forgotten about breathing.

Vi made a mental note to thank her dad again for planning ahead as Isha walked out, clad in her own black slacks, button down, and a little blue bowtie. She tried to surpress a laugh as she saw what he had meant by “modifications”.

How she had managed to sneak Silco’s old miner’s helmet along, Vi had no idea. How she had managed to sneak blue and pink paint markers from her mother’s art supplies, also a mystery. However one mystery that had been solved is why her and Prema had been so absent for the last few hours.

Pink, blue and white clouds had been drawn all over the miner’s cap, along with the right sleeve of Isha’s button-down. Vi looked at the blue clouds on her own arm, and felt tears of pride well in her eyes.

Prema was the one holding the basket of flower petals, the two of them throwing fistfuls onto the ground at their feet along with several people’s laps by accident. Vi didn't have time to laugh, as a moment later Powder walked out on Silco’s arm, the old man managing to keep pace even without his cane, though Vi could see Powder carrying more than a fair bit of his weight.

She was beautiful. That was the only thought Vi could manage to process. Over and over and over again, with every single step, she was beautiful. Her makeup was pristine, and Vi had no doubt in her mind that it was Mel’s handiwork. Vi couldn't believe the braids she'd put in Powder’s hair that morning had held up so well. Her wrist was exposed, showing a massive expanse of gears and machinery over her forearm, the back of her hand, and her ring finger. Her finger, just like Vi’s, had a gap left in the ink. Their eyes met, and Vi realized Powder was crying, a massive grin on her lips as tears dripped down her cheeks.

Compliments to Mel's craft, the makeup didn't run.

Vi’s face felt like it was going to split in half from her own smile, but she could tell her cheeks were wet as well. She felt her fingers brush silk in her pocket, and removed the silk kerchief Silco had given her, wiping her cheek quickly before Powder could finally reach them. Vi took Powder's hand, guiding her up the last step.

“You look beautiful.” Violet choked out, still grinning like a jackass.

“God stop or I'm gonna start bawling.” Powder laughed there at the altar, wiping her cheek with her hand. Vi took the kerchief and wiped the other side, offering it to Powder after. She took it as the priest said “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today” and by the time that doddering old jackass in the fancy robe had finished his shpiel, that little piece of blue silk was soaked through in tears from them both.

“I understand the couple has prepared their own vows.” The priest said with a smile.

“Yeah.” Vi said, fumbling for the piece of paper from her vest. She unfurled it with shaky hands and started reading. “I uh, when I started writing these, I didn't think I'd ever be able to fit every feeling I wanted to get across on a piece of paper. But, I figured that would be a stupid goal to begin with. I've got the rest of our lives to try and show you how much I love you and our strange, fucked up little family.” She stumbled a bit, looking at the priest. “Uh, pardon my French, padre. There will be more.”

The priest waved it off with a chuckle remarking “that doesn't sound like any French I’ve ever heard.”

Vi looked back to Powder, steadying herself. “I wanted to make some big dramatic declarations in my vows, but in all the years we've spent together, you've never asked me for anything except me, all of me. So, I don't really know what else I can promise except to give you just that. When life gets messy, when things get hard, when Isha takes your side in every single argument-” the crowd chuckled and Vi smiled at her daughter, sat beside Silco. “Traitor” Vi signed there on the podium, Isha just laughed as Vi looked back to Powder. “I’ll love you with every part of me that there is left to give. Even when the whole world feels like it's crashing down on us, I promise to stay by your side through every minute of it. If I went blind, I'd love the touch of your skin and that same apple pie perfume you've been wearing since you were a kid.” Powder laughed, hand to her mouth, her makeup finally starting to run. Vi supposed it was a matter of time. She took a breath and finished as best she could. “I fucking hate “till death do us part” because I'm sorry baby, you're stuck with me after that as well. As long as any trace of me exists on this earth, it will love you just as I love you now. I know that no matter what we face, as long as we have each other, it'll all work out.”

Powder wiped her cheek with the sopping wet silk.

“I hate to show you up on this baby, but I don't need a paper for mine.” Both of them laughed, and a chuckle rippled through their small audience. “I don't need a paper because I've had these vows thought out in my head since I was in highschool. Because I always knew we'd end up here eventually. Or well, I always hoped so. You were the one who defined what a good person was to me. My hero, my knight in shining armor, my strong butch who protected me from everything, no matter how much danger it put her and both of her brothers in.”

Ekko and Jayce cracked up behind Vi, who looked at them and repeated the sign for “traitor”. Ekko smacked her on the back of the head as Powder took a deep breath and continued.

“So, I promise to be there to undo the armor, to pull the weight off your shoulders and tend to your wounds. I promise to be there as a shoulder to cry on, and I promise not to tell Ekko or Jayce so they can't use it against you in your next silly game of bitching each other out.” She looked to the priest. “Apologies, father.” He waved it off. “I promise to hold your hand when you're afraid but can't admit it. I promise to rub your knuckles when they're sore and bloodied, and to always try and protect you just like you've always protected me, so that they never have to be again. But, seeing as you're insistent on teaching Isha how to box, I suppose that may be inevitable… I love you, Violet.”

“I love you too, Powder.” Vi choked out, certain that she looked like a mess. Isha and Prema scrambled back out of their chairs.

“Now, it's time for the rings.” The priest said. A moment later, the two of them walked back out with Prema carrying a small pillow covered in cling wrap with a machine on it, and Isha carrying a stool that looked massive compared to her small frame. It seemed to want to tip her over to one side of the other, but Isha managed to keep control of it just long enough to get it to the altar.

Isha set the stool down between them, and Prema offered the machine on the pillow.

“You ready for this, kiddo?” Vi asked, kneeling down to place her hand on the stool.

“You remembered how mommy showed you, right?” Powder asked, almost in unison with Vi. Isha got red in the face.

“Guys, you're embarrassing me. I've got it.” Isha signed out, placing two tiny ink caps from the pillow on the stool. One had blue, the other black. To Isha’s credit, she unwrapped the needle and placed it in the machine with a well practiced hand.

“Remember sweetheart, not too deep.” Powder reminded as Vi set her cloud-wrapped hand on the stool, their own makeshift workbench.

“You're gonna do great, kiddo.”

And she did. She filled in the lines on each of their ring fingers, just like she'd practiced with her mom a hundred times in the kitchen of their home. The lines were a little messy, and went a bit too deep on Vi’s finger, but the wedding bands were done. Vi gave Isha a hug and a kiss on the forehead, before she and Prema ran back to their seats.

“You may now kiss the bride.” Their hands were reaching for each other before the priest could finish his sentence. Vi wrapped her arms around Powder's waist, Powder wrapped hers around Vi’s neck, and they shared the first kiss of the rest of their lives.

Vi spun Powder around on the altar, tripping over her own shoe and sending them both tumbling into the dirt. They giggled like jackasses even as Jayce and Ekko rushed over to help them up.

They had their dinner, Isha and Silco sat on either side of them, with Prema, Sunil and Ekko progressing on Vi’s side of the circular table, and Jayce, Vik and Mel on Powder’s. Sunil nudged Ekko with his elbow, and Ekko cleared his throat, standing as he clinked his glass with his fork.

“I apologize, I haven't been to too many weddings before, so I may not do this too well, but I've been told it's a tradition for the best man to say a few words.”

Vi and Powder exchanged mortified glances, and Jayce couldn't hold back a wicked grin. “Oh I can't wait to hear this.”

“Now, for those of you who don't know, me and the couple go way back. We're family, that's kinda how that works.” The crowd chuckled and Ekko took a sip of his drink.

“That's not to say we've always been around each other. There's been a lot of time missed of eachother's lives. Some of it was by choice, most of it wasn't. But we never stopped being family. Vi found out, when we were first getting back into each other's lives, that I was riding the bus around Denver. So she tells me “fuck your bus pass. If you need a lift, let me know and I'll drive you wherever you need to go.”” Sunil covered Prema’s ears, but Isha just laughed. Ekko gave Sunil an apologetic look and a pat on the shoulder. “Sorry baby… but, she meant it. She drove me around in that rustbucket for almost a year. Come to find out, that whole time, she was searching around for pieces and parts, and built me a car out of em in her garage.”

“My mom's garage.” Jayce clarifies, earning a chuckle from Vi.

“Well, Vi builds me this car, with a little help from us, and says it's all mine. Less than 5 years later, she gets the engine, the one we put into that dinky lil Subaru out in the parking lot together, tattooed onto her back when I'm not even in town. We got into a pretty big fight, for reasons that aren't important now, not long after. Even when that included me cold-clocking her in the parking lot, she still got into her same old rustbucket and chased me down trying to apologize. No matter what I said, what I threw at her, she never gave up on me. Even when I told her to lose my number, even when I didn't speak to her, or Powder, or anyone for years, I eventually came back to find out that I'm somehow good ol “Uncle Ekko” to some punny little runt I'd never even met.” He walked around the table as he spoke, poking a giggling Isha in the miner’s helmet as he passed. He looked to Vi, to Powder, and smiled.

“These two never gave up on me, and if I'm being sappy and honest, I never gave up on them, even when I probably should have. Because that's just what family is.” Ekko looked at his cup, then at Vi and Powder, then at Isha and Prema and Sunil. “Without these two assholes, I wouldn't have a lot of the best parts of my life. For all the ups and downs, Vi, Pow, I hope you know that I'm glad I could be here for you today, and I'm glad that if nothing else, you two will always have each other.” Vi stood and wrapped him in a hug. When the two of them finally pulled apart, Powder kissed him on the cheek and had to wipe tears from her own.

“I hope you know I'm getting you back for this when it's time for your wedding. I'm writing the sappiest fucking tear jerker imaginable.” Vi said, wiping her own damp cheeks.

“Psh, who said I'm ever getting married?” Ekko joked, only for everyone else at the table to roll their eyes, save for the children.

“Oh please, it's been barely 6 months and you two moved in together ages ago. You're moving at dyke-speed, bud. I'm expecting engagement announcements before you hit a year.” Vi said, slapping him on the back.

Isha and Prema ran off to do something and Vi could only chuckle. Powder looked to Sunil and nodded toward the gap in the tent they'd run out of. “Why do I have a sneaking suspicion today won't be the last time we see them walking down an aisle together?”

“Because you're observant, and your daughter has a face with subtitles. Every one of you Dollangangers do.” Sunil replied, sipping his glass of wine as he smiled at Ekko.

The tables were moved to make space to dance, and within a couple hours there were several very-well-liquored-up pta parents receiving rides home while the rest danced in the forest.

A few chairs had been left open, and in one of them, sat a very winded Viktor. He watched the rest of the crowd mingle and dance around in pairs.

Sunil and Ekko were off in their own little corner, Jayce and Mel a little ways away, Isha and Prema jumped around together at the center of the dance floor in a manner that might possibly be called dancing somewhere Viktor had never been before. But he watched them all as the sweat trickled from his brow.

Vi, also sweaty and breathing hard, found her way into the seat beside him. Her vest has been undone and her button down unfastened almost to her belt.

“Whatcha doing over her, Vik-tory lap?” Vi asked.

“Resting.” He answered simply, chuckling at her eye roll.

“What, Jayce and Mel ditch you over here all by your lonesome? Assholes!” She shouted it vaguely in their direction but it was easily buried by the music.

“No, I was dancing with them earlier. Just… lost my breath, taking a moment.” He said, wheezing slightly. “It's… significant effort, to support my own weight, these days.”

“What if I helped take some of the load off?” Vi offered, flexing comically. “You look like you weigh less than Pow. I could throw you around the dancefloor pretty easy.”

“My my, Violet, talking like that will give people the wrong idea.” He feigned indignation, hand pressed to his forehead like he was about to faint from the vapours.

“Oh fuck off.” She kicked his foot. “For real, though. Let me help.”

“No, Violet, genuinely. It's kind, but I would hate to be a bother. You should dance with Powder.”

“Powder’s dancing with Silco.” Vi said, standing up and offering her hand. “Besides, you're not a bother, you're family.”

Viktor looked at Vi and smiled, taking her hand. She heaved him up like he weighed nothing, and the two danced around like jackasses.

Epilogue - Two Coffins by Against Me! / I know the end by Phoebe Bridgers

Isha sees her father wear a suit three times after that day in the hospital.

The first was a few days later, at her mother’s funeral. It was a small affair, just the immediate family, and a few guests. Her father wore a blue tie for the first time since the wedding.

Ekko and Sunil were there, they bowed their heads at the casket, laid a blue rose, and offered their condolences. When Vi finally broke down, it was Ekko who held her close, it was Ekko’s suit that absorbed the tears.

Sunil and Prema stayed with Isha, Prema always stayed with Isha, no matter how tough it was. Isha would never be able to say thank you enough for that, but she'd spend the rest of her life trying.

“If you ever need anything, either of you, you know you can always come to us.” Sunil assured, resting his hand on her shoulder. She nodded, signed out a thank you with shaky hands, and almost as soon as he stepped away, Prema led her off not too far from where Ekko and Vi stood, letting her sob herself.

Mel and Jayce laid their roses on the casket, and waited for the others to finally return. Isha was greeted first, her uncle wrapping her in a hug. “May her memory be for a blessing.” He choked out.

Vi returned, and received a hug from her second brother as Mel kissed Isha on the forehead. “I hope you know how proud she was of you, my dear.”

“Thank you, Aunty M.”

Uncle Ekko took her hand in both of his. “I think it might be best if your dad stayed with me and Sunil for a few days. If you want to stay with us, you're always welcome.”

“Thank you, but I…” her hands stalled in mid-air. “I think I want to be home tonight.” Ekko nodded and smiled.

“Then there's no way in hell your dad is going to agree to stay with us…” He chewed his cheek.

“You can come stay with us.” Isha signed. “I think she'd like having you around. She's got treatment tomorrow, it'd help a lot.”

“Of course.” her uncle said. “I'll pack a bag and be by later tonight, Sunny’ll understand.”

Caitlyn stood off to the side, distant from the others up to that point. It wasn't until Aunty M and Dad walked over to her that she finally joined the rest of them.

She laid her rose, and Isha could hear her whisper an apology to the casket, something about fleeing parking lots and missed chances. Isha didn’t know her well, then. But that would change with time.

Vi laid a bouquet on Powder’s casket, and threw her fist full of dirt when they were lowered down. Isha threw her own alongside her father.

Isha kept her word. She finished the semester and transfered to a university close to home. She moved into her childhood room, her and Prema video calling almost nightly as they worked on schoolwork together.

She took care of her dad just as Vi had taken care of Silco when Isha was little, including badgering him to smoke his damn pot and eat to get his strength up. She got her first scar on her knuckles burning the shit out of herself trying to cook him a grilled ham and cheese on a day when he was especially sickly after chemo.

Everyone stopped by as often as they could to check in and help out. Cait stopped by quite a bit.

Isha would hear whispers from her uncle's and aunts, wondering if Cait and her dad had gotten back together. The rumors buzzed that they'd restarted the gap-filling-fling neither of them had realized they were in all those years ago.

Isha knew better, though.

There was only ever one woman on this earth for her father, and she was buried in a cemetery a short walk’s distance from their home. She was buried alongside their fathers. Vi visits her, visits all of them, every night she has the strength to.

Caitlyn and her dad were weird, without a doubt, but how could they not be? She knew her dad had cared about Cait, her mom had too. But they never got the chance to make that clear and make amends with her like they had with uncle Ekko.

All that hurt, all that care (the two never being that far apart), it hadn't gone anywhere. Now they had so little time to figure out how to resolve it, with one fewer person there to be part of it.

Besides, Cait was taken by the time those rumors really started. Shed started seeing some graphic designer named Lest a few months after the funeral.

Cait was nice. She would help cook meals when Isha was tired from finals, help drive dad to appointments, help with the different pills and meds and supplements. She never quite became Aunty C, but she was someone Isha learned she could rely on.

There were moments where they'd be talking, Isha and Cait, and Isha would say something that made Cait just stare at her.

Isha had learned that look quickly after her mother’s death. The look of someone seeing her mother’s ghost in her. Isha felt a fucked up pride in it. Lest, when she started joining in on Cait’s visits, wouldn’t be so subtle. She'd look Vi right in the eye and go “that apple never fell far from your tree” when the two would start squabbling.

The second suit Vi wore was at Isha and Prema's wedding. Vi had given Isha her grandpop’s old leather vest when they announced their engagement, and it had been a bitch but Isha found a tailor willing to adjust it to her size. The back patch looked ridiculously big in comparison now, but Isha wore it without a suit jacket as she stood at the altar.

Her father sat in the front row, a portrait of Powder framed in her lap. Uncle Jayce sat on one side, Aunty M on the other, dad’s hand clasped in her own. Uncle Ekko and Sunil walked Prema down the aisle together.

Isha felt her brain short circuit at the sight of her, only able to process a singular thought as she watched her walk up the aisle: She was beautiful.

They had their dinner and some music and dancing. Her father danced with Aunty M and Cait, with Isha’s uncles and Lest, just about everyone. It wasn't the same, but it was family. It was enough.

The last time Isha would see her father in a suit was the day she was to rest beside her mother. Her father got ten years from the diagnosis date. Isha knew that it was a lot more than they should've expected, given what she had, but that didn't help the rage she felt looking at the casket.

Uncle Ekko stands by Isha’s side as they lay the coffin to rest. There are pink and blue roses by the dozen on its lid, along with a rusted and mud-stained old pocket knife.

It makes sense for it to be buried with her. The knight in shining armor, buried with her blade that never turned on her even at her weakest. Her last sign of victory.

Victory over what, Isha would never really be sure.

They threw their fist fulls of dirt on top of Vi’s coffin, and just stared at the pit for a long while as it was slowly filled in. The last surviving Zaunite took the hand of the last Dollanganger, the blue cloud on his wrist brushing against the pink and blue clouds on hers.

Aunty M and Uncle Jayce have their clouds on their wrist as well. Isha can see them as they approach to offer their condolences and their reassurances that they would always be there, telling Isha to call them whenever they could help. They offer their congratulations as well, gesturing to Prema's stomach. Caitlyn and Lest do the same, and give Isha and Ekko both a hug so tight it could crack bone.

Caitlyn was gentler with Prema, and the two started having a conversation about vitamins and all the many many things to avoid while pregnant. Lest and Jayce make small talk, Lest doing her best to try and comfort the man who was always too honest to really get his political career off the ground.

Ekko walks Isha to the rustbucket truck with the faded old bench seats that had driven her just about everywhere she needed to go since her childhood. There's a faded denim jacket with a blanket lining folded up in the middle of the seat. Isha pulls it out and walks over to Prema, draping it over her shoulders with a peck on her cheek. Isha pulls a lighter far older than her out of its pocket and fiddles with it as she walks back to her uncle.

“Don't go taking up smoking now, kid. Those things’ll kill you.” Ekko says.

“Yeah, a lot of things will.” Isha signs, leaning back against the truck. He looks at her, seeing a ghost of a butch only just buried under a head stone that read “loving husband, beloved father, cherished son, eldest sister.”

“You uh… you hear about that book Aunty M and Cait are working on?” Ekko asks.

“The one about mom and dad?” Isha signs out. “Yeah. They asked me a few things, asked if I wanted to write something to go in at the end, an epilogue I guess.” Isha sighs and stuffs the lighter in her pocket.

“You gonna do it?”

“Haven't decided.”

“You gonna read it?”

“No. I get why Aunty M wants to do it. Wouldn't be a good librarian if I didn't respect wanting to preserve a story, but I have a feeling anything they didn't tell me, they held back for a reason. I’m glad they listened to my idea about the ending. I think my parents deserve to be remembered for loving each other, not being torn apart. I like that they took my idea to change the last names too. Mom always loved those books when she was a kid. She'd get a real kick out of that being the fake name they settled on.”

Ekko chuckles and shakes his head. There's a long gap as he stares off in the distance at Cait and Prema, still talking away.

“Listen, kid, I understand you not wanting to disrespect their privacy, but I think there's something you should know about your parents.”

“I know.” Isha signs, throwing Ekko completely for a loop.

“They… they told you?”

“No shit. Dad told me the day I turned 18. Said it was my right to know, and do with that knowledge what I thought best.” She shrugs.

“I… I didn't realize you knew.” Ekko admits.

“Doesn't change a whole lot.” She signs. “I don't care that my dad was my uncle or however that works. He was a good dad. He was there for me, he taught me how to fight, taught me when it was the right thing to do. He looked the other way when I got suspended for clocking out that dickhead who was bullying Prema in middle school, sat me down, said that's what a good butch does and that he was proud of me and told me to enjoy my vacation. That's the shit I cared about.” Isha shakes her head, pacing back and forth, leaving Ekko seeing ghosts once again.

“You seem to have reacted to it a hell of a lot better than most of us did.” He said with a chuckle, Isha didn't have it in her to laugh, but she signed out a quick “yeah, they told me that story” much to Ekko’s embarrassment.

“You know… moms the reason I became a librarian.” Isha signed out, half-heartedly.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah… she talked about growing up in a big, empty house, only ever really getting to talk to people when she would go to the library at her school. She talked about the way that her whole life got changed by the books she'd read. The way that she’d get these plans to track dad back down from reading old Hardy Boys books and shit… she said a good book can do a lot to give someone hope, even when everything seems hopeless.”

“You think that's why aunty M is writing that book about your parents?”

“I have no idea why they're writing that. Maybe I don't need to… it'll be nice to be able to have that memory of them, though.”

Ekko rests a hand on her shoulder, and wraps her in a hug when she finally breaks down. He's family, that's what family does. She sobs into his jacket, gripping it with everything she has. She can feel his tears drip onto the top of her head as he finally cracks himself.

They calm their nerves as Prema, Lest and Cait come to check on them, Sunil and the others close behind.

They all say their goodbyes with plans for dinner together the next night. Caitlyn and Lest are invited. Even if she isn't Aunty C, they’re still family. Cait has the cloud to prove it. The ink is fresher, but Isha doesn't care.

Isha helps her femme up into the truck, and climbs in on the other side. She turns the key and the engine roars to life. They pull out and drive home.

Prema holds Isha’s hand and runs a thumb along sore but barely scarred knuckles. With any luck, their daughter won't have any on hers. Regardless, Isha Dollanganger wears her name as a badge of honor until the day she dies.